#Tally aint big

[fuzzlespup]

TALLAHASSEE MENTIONED!!!!!!!

"Interstellar Guide to the Planet Earth" by TJ Klune

By the end of this guide, you will have been given the tools in order to safely and carefully visit Earth. If you should have further questions, please see Glorbak the Destroyer of Worlds, who will be happy to answer any inquiries you may have.

Remember: Exploration is the key to survival!

1.   You meant to travel to the HUMAN LAND OF DEARBORNE MICHIGAN, but because of the bending of space and time, you accidentally ended up in the dark place known as TALLAHASEE FLORIDA. Do not fret! Though Florida is considered an area where dreams go to die (also see THE HUMAN LAND OF TEXAS), there are many wonderful things to discover, such as bugs, humidity, reptiles and HUMANS called JESSICA who chew loudly while running a business called a NAIL SALON. This is used to sharpen the talons of humans, and to paint them different colors. Though not much is known about this tradition, it is thought that it grants powers to the HUMANS who visit this establishment.

2.   Oh no! While exploring the HUMAN LAND OF NORTH YORKSHIRE ENGLAND, you happen to see a GREY disguised as a chimney sweep. As you are well aware, GREYS are an odious species whose entire way of life is built around anal probing. Though we have a treaty with the GREYS, it is important to remember that anal probing does not provide any scientific and/or medical knowledge. Given that the GREYS have the technology to do non-invasive full body scans, it’s unknown why they continue to proceed through the back entrance. If you come across a GREY preparing to do just that, please remind them that it is against RULE 5#$7^45J to proceed with anal probing without the expressed permission of the one being probed. Consent is important no matter what part of the universe you are in!

"Interstellar Guide to the Planet Earth" by TJ Klune

3.   HUMAN HOLES. Though it may seem disgusting to an elevated species, HUMANS evolved to have multiple holes in their bodies. Do not be scared! These are imperative to their survival. We have already discussed one hole (the anus), but did you know that humans have several more? The most diabolical is the hole in the top parts of their bodies, otherwise known as a MOUTH. Inside the MOUTH is a wet piece of muscle surrounded by shards of bone that pierce through the flesh. This is, as far as we can tell, a “feeding hole”, the bones used to break up sustenance, and the muscle inside swirls it around. In addition, there are glands in the MOUTH HOLE that create lubrication. It is unknown if this lubricant is poisonous. If you should see a HUMAN leaking lubricant from its MOUTH HOLE, it is either a) hungry or b) getting ready to attack. One line of thought is that the lubrication allows HUMANS to breathe fire, though no evidence of this has been noted.

4.   Most HUMANS have communication devices they carry around with them at all times. Interestingly, these devices seem to have an unintended consequence: not one of them could survive without it. If, on the off chance, you find yourself surrounded by a mob of HUMANS CARRYING TORCHES AND PITCHFORKS, tell them you are going to take their communication devices away. Most likely, they will crumble and dissolve into LEAKING LUBRICANT FROM THEIR EYE HOLES, begging you not to do what you said. Some have suggested that the HUMAN’S life forces are tethered to these devices, and if they are taken away, there is a chance the HUMANS will turn feral.

5.   And finally, the most important: DO NOT ASK HUMANS WHO THEY VOTED FOR. On Earth, people “choose” their leaders on a special day filled with love and celebration and good feelings. However, the HUMANS elected are oft considered “really bad at their job” and “unable to speak in coherent sentences.” In a fascinating turn of events, the HUMANS appear to be rare creatures who are somewhat advanced, but also continually make terrible decisions just because they’re mad about certain things that have no basis in reality. If you do make the mistake of asking a HUMAN who they voted for, chances are you will be stuck in a conversation that will last as long as the life of a star. The only way to get out of said conversation is to announce you voted for the other leader running in the election. This will most likely incense the speaker to say things like, “DAMN YOU, YOU DON’T CARE ABOUT ANYTHING BUT YOURSELF�� before leaving. Congratulations, you survived an encounter!

[life-series-playlist-submissions]

see i have a whole list of songs that i can associate w/ characters but unfortunately most of them are either for aus, or not for the life series at all (though still for lifers)

anyways here are a few others i have for life series, besides the ones i already have suggested- there is a very obvious bias here lol

there's actually quite a lot but i promise they all fit very well trust me

these are all tcw songs

"easier" w/ clockduo

"strangler fig" w/ ll!skizz (crane lives dtiys im looking at u)

"shallow river" w/ clockduo

"once and for all" with impulse and other crastle people :)

"queen of nothing" with life series winners, OR limited life

"how to rest" w/ skizz and the LiL affirmations

"icarus" w/ 3l imp n skizz

"i talk in my sleep" w/ clockduo AND imp n skizz..... post-life series. dont put it in the skizz playlist tho this aint about him /aff

"down the river" for SL!villain scar. specifically villain scar. also clockduo bc everything is about clockduo forever

"ribs" w/ dl!pearl

"pretty little things" w/ clockduo

"know how" w/ clockduo

oh wait one fish in a birdcage song- "rule #5: james picard" for last life

AND NOW. songs that are for specific aus (or are not for the life series) so you shouldn't add them to the playlists, but i thought they would be fun to talk abt anyways

"the bidding" by tally hall for a team BEST drag au me and my friend are making... very.... slowly....... i am always rotating it in my mind and exploding this au's skizzleman but i cant write for shit............ yes girl go discover a whole new thing that it turns out u love and then have ur aroace awakening................. and then get traumatized..............................................

"infinitesimal" by mother mother for the same au mentioned above

"rule #7: angel tango" by fish in a birdcage for... you guessed it... team best drag au................ (i have a whole playlist made. it was the first themed playlist i ever made. and i did it before we changed a whole important plot point so now i need to make another one. regardless here is the link i need to talk abt this silly au)

"sick of the silence" by mother mother for 3L!skizz in a very specific au i have where he's a shapeshifter and, during 3L, got stuck in one form (enderskizz)

"neverending hum" by lemon demon for skizz in general. impulse is the armadillo named corey /silly

"space oddity" by david bowie for hcs8!tango. i love david bowie guys

"my wife and my dead wife" (specifically the live version from "gotta let this hen out!") by robyn hitchcock for an ethimpdubs au i have where etho is bdubs' dead husband and impulse is bdubs' newer, alive husband, and then etho comes back as a ghost like ten years after his death

You can totally add songs that fit the personalities of the lifers in general! Also Space Oddity is 1000% HC8 Tango, big agree.

Added songs to the playlists Bdubs, Impulse, Skizz, Cleo, Tango, Grian, Scott, Pearl, Martyn, Scar, Joel, Last life and Limited life. (I added the Queen of Nothing song to all you suggested because I couldn’t make any decision).

[lxikobsd]

thx for reblogging that post (and adding onto it) on Kunikida's """erasure""" from the narrative. I stay mostly out of kicking the juggernaut pairing hornet's nest. altho it's about time the big ship fans stop acting like the world revolves around them. I admire the bravery bc this fandom climate silences me, and I know it silences more people

I have no issues kicking the nest out of spite against the most aggressive wasps

If we're using wasp metaphors, I've met SKK enjoyers that are like bumble bees. Super chill and its always a pleasent experience. And while I do have quite a bit of bias from being a shipper, I really enjoy talking with people who actually read the manga and analyze SKK and KNDZ's canon relationships.

But much like bees, its always the wasps who ruin it for everyone.

My vendetta against SKK shippers isn't against the bumble bees; its against the wasps who haven't touched BSD outside of dead apple/15/stormbringer and talk like they know anything, spread misinformation about my favorite character to promote their ship, spam the comments of people who dare to post Dazai or Chuuya in a ship that isn't SKK saying how it should've been SKK, have a superiority complex because they're pandered to by the producers of BSD and calling any other Dazai or Chuua ship "fake" while claiming SKK is canon because it gets more fanservice bait, harass Asagiri about SKK and even sending him death threats after he said it wasn't canon.

Its very obvious who has actually read BSD and who spend most of their time on BSD tiktok/ao3 by their opinions on characters, most notably SKK vs KNDZ, and most of the time its those people who are the metaphorical wasps.

Nothing Asagiri said in that interview about SKK was anything new in any way if you read the manga, but it was a slap in the face to people who got 80% of their view on SKK's dynamic from fanfics.

I've said it before, I don't hate SKK's canon dynamnic. I started out neutral on the ship when first getting into BSD but after my fate was sealed to being a dedicated KNDZ shipper I quickly grew to detest SKK as a ship because of shipper behavior. I've been suspecting it for a while, but getting confirmation that SKK is the reason my favorite anime character of all time has been getting shafted sparked a new rage in me against SKK and having him say SKK hate each other and there is no canonical feelings gives me a high that eases the pain of how pissed off I am

But speaking of Kunikida's "erasure", it seems as though he was always intended to be on a similar level to Dazai for screentime. I took notes of about 10 characters from BSD and tallied how many chapters they appeared in from chapter 1 to 53. 50 seemed like a good number of chapters and 53 is the final chapter of the Cannibalism arc stuff. My only criteria was they had to physically appear in the chapter, no flashbacks or mentions.

Atsushi was obviously 1st place with 44 chapters at about 83% of chapters. Dazai in second with 34 chapters (64%), and Kunikida in third with 32 chapters (60%)

Dazai often gets credited as Atsushi's mentor but really Kunikida is the one who is more suited for that title. He's the one who actually helped Atsushi adjust to his new life working at the ADA in the first arc, he was the one who talked to Atsushi when he cried realizing the ADA is full of people who care and don't think he's a burden, he's the one who teaches Atsushi to fight and not over rely on his tiger power.

Dazai brought the street cat home, Kunikida is the one who takes care of it by feeding it, bathing it, taking it to the vet, cleaning its litterbox, etc. But Dazai gets called the cats owner because it was his idea to bring it home and he plays with it sometimes. It aint just the narrative that erases him to meet the SKK quota, the fans erase how important he is especially to Atsushi

[minniethemoocherda]

Iridescent: Chapter 11

Summary: When Jazz is promoted to Head of Special Operations, the last thing he expected was to have to work with a face from his past.

Ao3

FF.net

Jazz quickly shut off the robotic voice of his text-to-speech generator as he heard a knock on his door.

He wasn't expecting anyone. And the past few times that someone had turned up unexpectedly at his door hadn't exactly bode good news so he went to answer it with caution.

Even with all the scenarios he was imaging, Jazz was still surprised to find Prowl standing behind his door.

"Hey Commander." Jazz greeted, leaning against the doorway. "You got more paperwork for me?"

"No." Prowl stated. His expression gave nothing awayway but judging by his long pause he was clearly gathering his thoughts to say something. "Would you like to... hang out with me?"

Jazz nearly slid off the doorframe. Honestly he'd been starting to worry that Prowl was about to tell him that somebody else had died. So it was a bit of a relief. If no less confusing. But frankly Jazz didn't really care about the reasonings behind Prowl's change of heart. As whilst Jazz wasn't currently the Praxian's biggest fan, that didn't mean that he didn't want Prowl to like him back.

"Alright." He shrugged, not wanting to appear too eager. "Do you want to meet up in the rec-room for lunch?"

"The recreational room is very loud." Prowl stated.

"Well most people's shifts don't start ending for another hour so it should be pretty quite right now. I'll just finish this then we can head down if you want?"

Prowl paused, that breifly blank look crossing his eyes that Jazz had begun to recognise as when he was assessing all possible probabilities with that big battle computer brain of his. Whatever conclusion he'd come too must have been acceptable as a moment later Prowl nodded.

Jazz tried his best to finish his work as quick as possible. He avoided Prowl's gaze as he turned the text to speak generator back on but thankfully the commander didn't make any comment on it.

As soon as he was done, Jazz lead the way towards the rec room, not wanting to give Prowl time to change his mind.

Thankfully Jazz had been right in his guess that it wouldn't be busy. Besides the clashing green and red forms of Inferno and Hound taking up one of the central tables with a cyber-chess match, the place was empty.

Jazz poured a cube of energon for himself then one for Prowl, trying the get it to the same shade of pink that he remembered Sideswipe previously making for the commander. It must've been close enough as Prowl took one inspecting glance at cube before taking a sip. Jazz mentally tallied that as a win.

Despite the place being practically empty, Prowl took them to the right corner booth which would let them survey the room whilst keeping an eye on the exit. Whether Prowl was aware that he'd done this on purpose, Jazz wasn't sure but he wasn't about to complain when he would have done that same.

As soon as he sat down, Prowl sharply turned his whole body towards him.

"The weather is terrible today." Prowl stated. He then proceeded to stare at Jazz expectantly.

"Err yeah sure is." Jazz replied.

There was then an awkward silence as Prowl apparently had no idea what to say after that. Whatever was happening here, the guy was at least trying, so Jazz decided to throw him a bone.

"So how's Bluestreak settling back in?" He asked, guessing that would be a safe subject.

Sure enough, that got Prowl to brighten up.

"She is settling in well. And I am glad that she has found a friend in Bumblebee."

"Me too." Jazz said. Primus knows the kid could do with better influences than the twins. "Hey If this is too personal then you can tell me to frag off but if you don't mind me asking, what did Bluestreak mean that you weren't biologically brother and sister? Because you could've fooled me! And believe me, that aint an easy thing to do."

"As the only other known Praxian still alive, I believed that it was my duty to become her gaurdian after the destruction of Praxus."

Shit. Jazz had been stationed in Iacon at the time but like everyone else left on their planet, he had heard of the Battle of Praxus. Although calling it a battle was a bit disingenuous. A slaughter would be more acurate. Praxus had been a Neutral State up until that point so most of the casualties had been civilian. Many of the remaining neutral cities had joined the Autobots after that but in Jazz's opinion the loss of life hadn't been worth it.

"Well from what I've seen from her records she's grown into a resilient young bot." Jazz told him.

"She should not have needed to become so resilient." Prowl stated, a slight edge to his voice. "She has been through so much for such a young age. Loosing her family, deciding to transition and growing up during a war."

"Still, you must be proud of her?"

"I claim no responsibility for her strength of character. That is all her. But yes I am proud." A rare smile crossed Prowl's face. It soon vanished however when he turned his attention back to Jazz. "Do you have any siblings?"

"I did." Jazz stated before smoothly moving the subject back to Bluestreak. "Is she the reason you're doing... whatever this is?"

"Yes." Prowl sighed. "She is worried I do not talk to anyone whilst she is away and I cannot have her worrying about me whilst on a mission when a distraction could cost her life."

Okay that made sense. What didn't make sense was- "Why did you pick me? I thought you hated me!"

"I do." Prowl replied without hesitation. "But you are the only one interested in talking to me."

"Well how do ya know that for certain? When was the last time you actually tried to make friends with someone?" Jazz asked.

Prowl's eyes took on that blank look once again and judging by the fact that it was taking him this long and he hadn't come up with an answer yet told Jazz that it had probably been a long time.

"Listen if you genuinely to be my friend then I'm more than happy to be! But I don't want you to feel like you have to settle for me because you think I'm you're only option." Jazz told him.

"You are my only option."

Well with that attitude he would be. Still as he had done with Mirage all those years ago now, Jazz decided to give the bot a helping hand.

Glancing around the room, Jazz's gaze landed on Hound and Inferno, two of the friendliest mechs in the entire Autobot army.

Perfect.

"Come on!" Jazz downed the rest of his drink then held out a hand to the commander. After a moment's hesitation, he took it allowing Jazz to lead them over to the central tables.

"Heya mechs! Who's winning?" Jazz asked, dropping Prowl's hand so that he could lean on the comparitivly cooler table.

"Inferno." Hound grumbled.

The bot in question shrugged. "That's only because I've played against my Red so much."

"I've been trying to think outside the box like you're always telling me! But it's hard when you're literally playing with little boxes!" Hound faux whined, pretending to bang his head on the table.

"That's because you're taking it too literally." Jazz explained, patting his friend on the helm. "We ain't confined to black and white boxes in real life!"

Jazz then grabbed one of Inferno's pawns and ate it.

"Well I've gotta admit, I have no idea how to respond to that." Inferno stated whilst Hound banged his head against the table for real.

"I do." Prowl stated, moving another pawn to take its place.

Interested to see where the commander was going with this, Jazz moved Hound's own pawn to steal it back. It wasn't until three moves later that Jazz saw what was about to happen the second before Prowl took his rook.

Jazz grinned.

Oh it was on.

Hound and Inferno had already whittled down each others pieces so it wasn't long until the two commanders were down to two pieces each. Jazz with a knight. Prowl with a rook. And both with their king.

Within that time the lunch hour had truly begun and their little game had drawn quite a crowd. But despite the number of people, the room was oddly quiet. Many of them were probably in shock to see the head of tactics actually in the Rec Room for first time.

Being a spy, Jazz had been aware of the silent swarm starting to form, but Prowl was so engrossed in the game that he hadn't appeared to have noticed.

Jazz smirked to himself, as he placed his knight adjacent  to his opponents king.

Prowl paused, looking up to stare at Jazz with those intelligent blue eyes. Jazz gave nothing away, keeping his smirk only for himself.

Sure enough, two moves later, Prowl defeated Jazz's King and the crowd exploded.

Prowl froze as the mechs surrounded him with applause, singing his praises and clasping his shoulders.

Jazz allowd himself a small chuckle at the sight.

Perhaps Prowl wasn't a complete arsehole. Sure he was partly. But more so he was just extremely socially awkward.

Jazz allowed the crowd another minute to shower their congratulations before coming to Prowl's rescue.

"Alright I know most of ya'lls shifts have started again by now so get ya sorry afts back to work!" Jazz ordered. After a few grumbles and quick dashes for energon, most having forgotten to refuel in their engrossment, soon only the original players remained.

"Thanks for letting us joing in." Jazz grinned. "And sorry about your pawn. I'll make ya a new one!"

"Don't worry about it!" Inferno said, waving him off before perking up. "Hey I was thinking of starting a cyber-chess club. I thought it would be fun for the base! Plus it would be a good excuse to get Red out of their room." He then turned to Jazz with a pleading glint to his optics. "Just promise me you won't eat the peices when playing with them? I think it would cause another episode."

"I promise." Jazz said, holding his hand to his spark. Out of the corner of his eye, he snuck a glance at Prowl.

The Head of Tactics had a slightly blank stare on his face as though what Inferno had just asked them didn't logically make sense.

Jazz gave him a subtle nudge.

Prowl blinked, his mind seemingly now back within this realm of reality as he turned to Inferno.

"Yes, I would like to join your club." Prowl said. Jazz thought that he imagined the corners of Prowl's lips twitch in a smile.

"Thank you so much!" Inferno beamed as they started to pack away. "I'll send you both a rota for matches!"

"Can't wait!" Jazz cried, giving him and Hound a wave as he strolled towards the exit. Prowl followed behind him after a polite nod.

As soon as they stepped outside, the blast proof doors slammed shut behind them, leaving the pair in total silence.

"You let me win." Prowl stated.

"Of course. It's the only way you could win against me." Jazz said, finally letting his smirk free.

"I could have beaten you."

"Prove it." Jazz dared, his smirk now a full on grin.

"I will." Prowl told him, that monotone voice of his expressing his calm confidence.

"I'm looking forward to it." Jazz said, turning down the corridor towards his habsuite, surprised that he actually meant it.

He had nearly reached the end of the corridor when caught Prowl's reply.

"Me too."

The next morning stacked on top of Jazz's mounting pile of daily reports, was a datastick.

Curious, he plugged it into his computer where a voice recording tab popped up.

He pressed play, and was surprised yet touched to hear the words of this mornings reports read aloud by Prowl's steady voice.

[glittcrsss]

These would all look pretty normal on their own but together it’s a goddamn freakshow

[katsukikitten]

Bakugoxreader is a USA transfer. Shes really sweet but doesn’t put up with bakugos shit. He tolerates her because she puts up a good fight and low key thinks her accent is adorable. one day their class has a tea and shes bummed because she likes iced sweet tea. Everyone thinks that’s weird but later that night Bakugo shows up with a pitcher and a little embarrassed because he doesn’t know if he used enough sugar. Then she jokes about in the south sugar could also mean kissing. And then they do.

Sun Tea

A/N Hopefully this is close to what you had in mind lovey! Enjoy! Thank you for your patience while I wrote this!

Three sets of eyes stare down at the pile of cards atop the circular coffee table, each of you sitting cross legged while a few of your other class mates sit among the couches.

"Draw six Y/N." Kirishima wears a rare devilish smile as he places down a yellow draw two card atop two other hellish cards.

You return his smile holding eye contact with Bakugou as you dramatically produce a red draw two.

"Bless your heart Bakugou doll, you've gotta draw eight." You take much satisfaction in placing down the card that will screw him over.

A little too much actually, it's not very hospitable of you to enjoy another's misfortune.

It all boils down to when you were first transferred here, mostly against your will, from America Bakugou hated you with every fiber in his being.

And you hated him in return, which was quite unlike you.

But he had aired all your dirty laundry about your delinquent behavior that you had done in America.

What he didn't know was you had to do those things to survive.

You absentmindedly brush against the tattoo on your neck and two sets of red eyes follow.

Believe it or not he was beginning to see that now.

Could really see how much that lifestyle was thrust upon you.

"This is a stupid fucking game! Why'd I let you talk me into playing hair for brains!?" Bakugou snarls, snatching at the deck on the table counting out eight muttering fuck you beneath his breath.

Kirishima laughs in response as he places down a red eight, Deku places down a red six before you place down a skip.

"You're fucking working together huh?" He snarls darkly and you laugh.

"Ain't his fault you're as lucky as a June bug in November." Your laugh echoes in the room. Pulling at the ash blonde's stomach. Although he doesn't know what the hell you're saying he knows that your voice is just too God Damn cute. You notice the dusting of red on his cheeks and chalk it up to his temper.

To which he adds validity to your assumption by adding harshly.

"What in the fuck are you saying?"

It's a question you hear often.

"I believe she means you're not lucky at all." Todoroki chimes in, heterochromatic eyes peering over his book. Momo nods in agreement as she writes down the expression as she has been these past few months, every now and again she'll try to use the English expression in everyday conversation to you.

And honestly you don't have the heart to tell her that not ALL Americans will understand what she's saying.

You pray to the good Lord that she'll run into another decent Southern belle who would get a lick of what she's saying.

Kirishima takes sympathy and places down a reverse for his friend.

Bakugou smiles from ear to ear and plops down an angry looking black card.

"Draw four bitch." He snarls close to your ear and you narrow your eyes. You draw a blue zero, a red two, a green six and the very card that first scorned you.

A draw four that may be your saving grace.

"Don't be gettin too big for ya britches now Suki, Im fixin ta win." You drawl out real heavy because you're excited and again Bakugou's cheeks begin to heat.

You smirk a deadly smile to him that he returns ten fold.

His smile sends your stomach into a tizzy and you try to talk yourself from the edge.

The two of you had just gotten over absolutely loathing each other and transitioned into hard frienemies.

So why the hell were you fighting off a crush?!

It was bound to happen since Aizawa paired the two of you together and only because Bakugou had the highest score in English.

But damn if you weren't hard to understand sometimes. It was like you weren't even speaking English!

At least not the english Bakugou was taught.

Depsite your past, time showed those harsh scarlet eyes that you weren't a total lost cause, an extra undeserving of a second look.

You more than proved you were a worthy rival and it all came after the phrase.

*"Oh I'm finna kick ya ass to high heaven."*

He has never seen you so flustered before and damn did you keep good to your word.

Forcing him to actually try against you. Never admitting that he enjoyed that part of you.

Narrowed eyes, flushed cheeks and pouty lips pulled past white teeth looking "madder than a wet hen."

Or whatever the hell it was you said.

He just hadn't known he would enjoy that odd ass twang you had too.

But you'll never know that it wasn't really Kirishima who convinced Bakugou to play this stupid idiotic game.

No, it was you, when you wore that devilish smirk before adding

*"Guess you're too scared you'll lose!"*

Katsuki sat down and actually dealt the cards himself then.

"Does anyone want tea?" Mina asks, peeking out from the kitchen.

"Please dahling!" You shout and she smiles your way before making her way back to that amazing smelling dinner.

You have two cards left in your hand, you feel lucky but at the same time you're relying on Bakugou to set down a card that will benefit you.

Please God let it be either a blue card or a zero.

You really didn't want to have to use your ace in the hole or have to draw.

Bakugou places down a red reverse causing Kirishima to draw a few cards before he slaps down a red eight.

"Oi Deku. Make yourself useful. Y/N only has two cards." Bakugou snarls, Izuku gulps avoiding eye contact.

He looks over his cards with nervous eyes muttering to himself with each passing second Bakugou gets that much more agitated.

"OI! PUT DOWN A CARD!" He yells and Deku does hastily.

And the Uno Gods have blessed you as a red zero stares lovingly up at you.

"Its about to go to hell in a hand basket for y'all! Uno!" You exclaim as you place down your card, switching it to blue.

"What?!" Kirishima laughs while Bakugou snarls.

"Means you're about to have a bad time." This time Todoroki doesnt even bother to look up from his book. He flips the page and Momo flips through her own notes.

She must spy the phrase and puts a tally by it. She figures the more times you've said it the more common the idiom.

Little does she know there are some phrases in their you'll most likely never utter again having been quick witted when you made the Southernism on the fly

"How the hell do you know what she's saying?" Denki asks looking up from his switch, trying hard not to move as Jhiro naps on him. Dead to the world with her head phones plugged in.

Todoroki shrugs flipping another page before he eyes the game.

Bakugou sucks his teeth, he doesnt have anything to use against you, you clearly don't even go after him.

And to make things worse he doesn't even have fucking blue or a damned zero. He draws seven cards before blue shows up. He places the blue nine down harshly, Kirishima places a green nine over top of it and all eyes fly to Deku.

Who again begins to murmur and mutter as he thinks of his next move.

All the while your smile grows wider and wider.

There isn't much of a card out there that could stop you.

Deku hesitantly lies down a red nine hoping that changing the color so rapidly would cause you anxiety.

When he see that it doesn't he begins to watch in horror as you place down that little black cars with the +4 in the corner.

"No..." He gasps.

"NO!!" Bakugou shouts slamming his fists agaisnt the table, "Rematch!"

"What's the with all the fuss?" Mina asks carrying a large tray of drinks. She makes her way around the room setting down a scalding cup to each person.

"Y/N won and Bakugou's mad." Kirishima explains kissing Mina's cheek and tapping his lap, "Thanks babe."

She sits cozily picking up her cup.

The whole class, aside from yourself and napping Jhiro seem to take a sip of the tea in unison.

Everyone holds the cup just in front of their chest as a smile spreads on their face.

Even Bakugou looks joyful and you look to the steaming liquid in the gray cup before you.

Heavily missing your favorite sweating Mason jar clinking with ice as you watched summer storms a brew.

Scarlet eyes notice how your drink goes untouched, he nudges you harshly before shouting.

"Oi!" He hates the long face you wear, "Drink it before it gets cold."

"I uh... I keep forgettin the tea aint iced or sweetened here." You say sheepishly keeping your eyes down, "Thank you Mina."

"What? Iced? Sweet?" Bakugou sounds baffled as he tried to understand.

Tea was fucking tea. It didn't need ice and it didn't need sugar.

"Yea! It's a staple in the Southern states. Can't throw a rock where it ain't served." Your face brightens as you speak, that drawl even heavier, "And sweet enough to rot your teeth!"

"Why?" Bakugou asks borderline nasty while you have the attention of everyone in the room.

"You see it gets hotter than Hell in the South, humid enough to make ya melt faster than Frosty in July. So sweet tea keeps ya sane. It's cool and of course sweet, keeps us southern folk from being bitter about how hot it is." You stare into the liquid in the cup, almost imagining it to be different.

"Oh! And if it's hot enough in the summer, which it always was where I was from, yall can make sun tea."

"Alright you're making shit up now." Bakugou shakes his head before taking another sip. He closes his eyes when he sees that his comment has struck something in you.

Your face flashes from angry to almost hurt.

"I used to make the best sun tea every summer." You say longfuly before adding, "Anyway I'm tired. Imma head to bed."

"But dinner is soon!" Kirishima and Mina express their worry in unison.

You smile to mask your hurt. Although it was extremely hard for you in America there were somethings you missed greatly.

Sweet sun tea was one of 'em.

You could take the girl out of the South but not the South out of the girl.

"I'll be fine. I'm full as a tic from that late lunch. I'll see y'all when the roasters sing." You wave as you head towards the stairs.

All the while crimson red eyes bore into you.

Before the bore into space through dinner and now into the ceiling as he lies in bed.

Why did you look like that?

Where you that upset?

Had his comment been too far?

Were you madder than that stupid wet hen you kept mentioning?

No, he knew you weren't mad he knew you were feeling "blue" and that he needed to some how make you "right as rain."

That's how you said it right?

He snarls as he snatches up his phone looking up this and that before settling on doing the ultimate thing for you.

He bares his teeth when he sees JUST how long this will take and that he may have to move it depending on the sun.

But he rises early from bed anyway and gets all of the things needed for what he's fixing.

Soon the morning melts into night and Bakugou was lucky that it was in the dead of summer.

Katuski notices that you announce that you're going to"hit the hay" sooner than you normally do when you're not feeling yourself.

Nervousness begins to escape him through beads of sweat on his brow as begins the finishing touches.

You lie on your bed, scrolling through the old photos on your Insta. Longing for those flashes of lightning, corn fields brightened by the moon's light and those old winding backroads.

You open your window to let the warm air in, at least Japan and the south had one thing in common.

Even the bugs would scream late into the night about how hot the day was.

You lie back again, sighing as you scroll, longing for those times once more.

You missed the stars, you missed the barn cats, the hens, the long trips to the beach.

You scroll down a bit further and spy a picture that brings tears to your eyes.

"You're dumber than a box of rocks Y/N pull it together!" You whisper to yourself as you wipe your eyes.

It was only a photo of a large glass container absorbing all of that summer sun and a wide mouth quart mason jar filled with ice.

Ready to be filled.

Still tears fall and for the first time you cry.

Cry for the lost memories.

The lost time and most importantly your lost childhood.

That place took everything from you, forced you to the cities to sell and steal.

But here you were crying like a baby over some tea and the moon.

A harsh knock comes at your door that has your heart in your throat.

You toss your phone as if you were looking as something bad before clearing your throat.

"Coming honey. Gimme a sec I ain't decent." You say, not really lying as you look yourself over in the mirror.

It really wasn't decent for a Southern Belle to cry over some spilt sweet tea.

You open the door to be met with burning scarlet eyes.

"Honey really?" He asks with a smirk.

"Had I know it would have been you that the cat dragged in I would have said vinegar instead." You cross your arms, far from in the mood to deal with Bakugou of all people.

He gives you a pointed look, half knowing what you mean before he sighs heavily.

"I've got something for you now sit down and close your damn eyes." He snarls and you look at him suspiciously.

"Last time you 'had' something for me we scrapped with our fists." He rolls his eyes and gently guides you into your room. He ushers you to sit on your bed making his way back to the hall.

"No peeking damn it!" He growls. Now it is your turn to roll those gorgeous eyes before you close them with an exasperated sigh.

What in Sam's hell was he up to?

You hear an odd sound of clinking before he kicks your door shut.

A long silence stretches between the two of you before courage returns to Bakugou.

Something cool is pressed against your palm and you grab onto it quickly letting your eyes flutter open.

When you spy a mason jar filled with ice and sloshing tan liquid you squeal as if it were a wedding ring. Your reaction alarms Bakugou before he sees the smile forming on your kissable lips.

He swallows his hot desire as you jump up and down on the bed.

He swallows his hot desire as you jump up and down on the bed.

"Is this what I think it is?!" You bring the jar to your lips and taste.

Your body relaxes and your head tilts back, eyes fluttering as it brings a rush of memories.

How did he get the tea to sugar ratio so...so fucking perfect.

You dare not ask who made this tea because it was made right.

Your heart pounds in your chest as you take in all of the context clues.

Bakugou had been going outside every hour or so today. Making some sort of excuse not to leave the dorms today.

Then he holed himself up in the kitchen just before you had turned in for the night.

Lastly his cheeks were red, burning hot and it finally dawns on you that it isn't from his temper.

But from something else.

Your heart pounds in your chest.

"Is...is that enough sugar for you?" Bakugou asks hesitantly, scratching the back of his head.

You laugh aloud wondering if he realizes the double meaning to his words.

"What?! What is so fucking funny? Is it fucking laughable how bad it is?!" He growls standing as you set down your tea as your laughing fit sets in.

Finally you wipe away a stray tear before regaining your composure.

"Oh no. Bakugou it's great. But sugar has another meaning in the south." You giggle again before adding, "Sugar can mean kissing.

Bakugou stares at you for a moment, he watches as you brush you hair behind your hear. He drinks in the blush that burns in your cheeks seep down your throat as you realized what you've just said.

And he breathes in the sweet smell of summer air carried in on the breeze of your open window.

All day while he tended to that sun tea, moving it into direct sunlight he caught wiffs of smells that reminded him of you. Wild flowers, lilies, sunflowers, honeysuckle, all swaying in the wind watching as he worked and every time he opened the top to that tea he would smell that sharp black tea, combated by the sweet smell of sugar.

He slides his hands past your cheeks, wrapping fingers into hair as he pulls your face to his.

Capturing your lips with his own, and like every spar you've had with him you fight to be the winner. Pulling at this bottom lip with your teeth, demanding entrance the he allows but only for his tongue to win in the end.

He kisses you until you become putty in his hands, melting into his touch as your hand grips tightly onto his black skull tee shirt. A moan escapes your lips as he kisses you impossibly sensual and slowly.

He pulls away and you actually whine but he does not move far, pressing his forehead to yours.

He stares at you before a deadly smile crosses his slightly swollen lips. His voice comes out dangerously husky as he says

"Is that enough sugar for you?"

[hey-hamlet]

BNHA AU Ideas: Songbird, Part 2

Also on AO3! 

Link to Part 1 

TL;DR: 

Izuku has a powerful quirk: he can give powers to the people around him based on the different songs he sings. Unfortunately, everyone else really wants that quirk and are willing to kidnap him to get it. 

Songbirds sing even when the music stops.

Hello I’m redefining Izuku’s quirk for the sake of more dramatic powers: Most songs are general power-ups (everyone in auditory range), others are personal power-ups (only the person singing). Both only affect those who hear them, unless the effect is 100% intrinsic. Izuku uses a lot of general power-ups because he’s helpful like that. Each song can only be used once per day.

Examples: A song that creates a forcefield will only be a barrier to those who hear it, but a strength increase is a strength increase no matter which way you slice it.

anyway! day 1 of class is ok bc izuku and bakugo head to school together, and its honestly a miracle he didn't get kidnapped again

anyway, he meets iida and is fucking floored when he apologises for yelling at him. uraraka calls him the "boy with the singing quirk" and hes pretty happy. bakugo is grudgingly pleased izuku has friends and sits down, izuku following suit. shinsou is half asleep at his desk and seems to have been there the whole time

aizawa does his little spiel, quirk assessment happens yadda-yadda. izuku looks so chill on the outside but the kid is freaking the fuck out internally

he's coming second in the test, aizawa still erases his quirk, more of an example to the class because he assumed izuku wouldnt lose his shit. he didn't - at least externally

from this we also find out izuku has a kind of internal metronome because he suddenly has no internal 'beat' when his quirk is erased. his hearing gets substantially worse too.

which serves to freak him the fuck out because he feels off balance and like hes had cotton stuffed in his ears

anyway, yeets the ball, all is good, bakugo glares fucking daggers at aizawa for singling out izuku and izuku tries not to dissociate

battle trial is nothing special, but bakugo just fucking,,, turns his hearing aids off so izukus quirk doesnt work on him

its a blessing and a curse because it leaves izuku free to use most personal powerups, but honestly bakugo wants a nice fight more than he wants to win so thats fine with him

izuku wins, but only just, izuku gives uraraka a speed up through the comm link, iida who was Not ready for that, loses

USJ

Bakugo and Izuku sing Stronger than You and kick ass for a solid while before the song runs out and the nomu hits them into the lake. Izuku, with a broken leg and the beginnings of a concussion, has to drag a semi-conscious Bakugo to shore and let me tell you they both almost drown like 8 times. Izuku helps All Might by singing Anything (Hedly), which functions honestly like a big Ol’ Plus Ultra to anyone believing in what they are doing. (It starts working on Shigiraki after the Stain arc, but before then he was acting without purpose)

Sports festival!

All Might and Izuku are basically dad and son in this universe too, so, despite the dissimilar quirks, Todoroki still calls out Izuku to fight. Because Todoroki is the son of Endeavour and privy to a little more heroics insider info than he really should be, he also knows how often Izuku deals with villains. In an attempt to piss off the eternally nice and collected boy enough to give him a fight he can piss off Endeavour with, he calls him a damsel in distress.

Izuku is fuming and Bakugo has to basically hold onto his forearm to stop him from clocking Todoroki right in the jaw, but lord is Bakugo also pissed. Todoroki, for a second, realises he may have fucked up.

Todoroki wins the first event, Izuku is pretty middling. Like he's top 10? But he didn’t make a major impact. But the guy sees Monoma and gets an Idea

“HI SO – I know you hate class 1A, and really there is something to be said for the way our school is trying to pit 2 classes of children against each other like a bitter blood feud - BUT I have an idea that could be 100% ridiculous and if you want 1B to make an impact, please work with me. I need to shove something in Todoroki’s face.”

“… I’m listening.”

The general idea is Izuku’s songs have a different effect when sung in a duet, some are only practical in duet form: IE, stronger than you is a dodge boost alone, but in a duet is a massive power boost to the two singing it. So what if two people with Izuku’s quirk sung a duet? Chaos, probably.

Monoma agrees because one of the only things he likes more than 1 upping 1A is quirk based tomfoolery. The team ends up consisting of Izuku, Monoma, Kendo and Uraraka. Kendo and Uraraka, with the use of Uraraka’s quirk, carry both Izuku and Monoma – the better you sing, the better the quirk works.

Its lucky Monoma knows most of the songs Izuku brings up as ideas, and adds some suggestions of his own. If the other two know the song it's not a bad idea to join in, but its not the end of the world if they don’t.

The list of songs they have on standby and their effect when sung by two people with the Songbird Quirk

Two Player Game - Be More Chill: It forms both a connection between the people singing it, allowing them to anticipate the other's movements and creates a semi-translucent double of each singer that mimics their movements with a half second delay, aka: each punch you throw hits twice.

Family – Mother Mother: Creates a kinda forcefield that hovers just above the body. The stronger the bond between the singers, the stronger the shield – good thing Uraraka and Kendo know that one.

Hurry Hurry – Airtraffic Controllers: Slows down your perception of time, giving the appearance of superhuman reflexes. With the addition of a partner, it also grants superspeed.

We don’t get tired, we get even – Pat the Bunny: The more energy you’ve used up, the more energy you get back when singing this song + a proportional increase in general ability.

Doubt Comes In – Hadestown: Anyone who hears it quickly loses the ability to fight other people, including the singers.

The Greatest Show – The Greatest Showman: In addition to the normal effect of drawing attention to the point you can’t look away, singers get a ‘moon jump’ ability.

Turn the Lights Off – Tally Hall: Makes the area pitch black and gives the singers monstrous forms with plenty of claws and eyes.

How they use these is up to your imagination, but they end having taken the 10’000’000 point band from Todoroki. Bakugo, the only person with a decent understanding of Izuku’s quirk, just turned off his hearing aids and told his team to block their ears when weird shit started to happen. They came second, Todoroki third and Shinsou’s team fourth.

Uraraka gets to the second round bc Bakugo fights Monoma in the first round and jesus that fight is hilarious because its just Monoma – while using Bakugo’s quirk too – insisting that Izuku has abandoned class 1A for class 1B and Bakugo getting progressively more done with this boy’s shit.

Izuku and Bakugo + Todoroki and Iida are the semi finalists. Izuku and Bakugo are mostly just like “Thank fuck I’ve been talking to so many god damn weirdos today please can we just have a normal fight”. Izuku wins, j u u s t. (Izuku and Bakugo have a pretty 50/50 win loss ratio going on in this AU)

Todoroki vs Izuku is the final round of the whole thing, Todoroki told him about Endeavour, Izuku is pissed that no one looks at him and sees him, they only see his quirk (other than like, 6 people at this point). So he gets where Todoroki is coming from but holy shit hes doing literally just that. The main song Izuku uses for that round is Escapism – Steven Universe which makes him intangible (other than like his feet so he doesn’t go through the floor like Mirio). He’s trying to get the vibe across to Todoroki that he is free of his blood. He stops singing just to scream that at him, which is really what loses him the round. He's not intangible anymore, so he has no way to dodge the fire that comes at him. But he's pretty happy anyway.

Stain Arc!

Izuku’s hero name is Lyre!

Izuku doesn’t intern with Gran, but he does visit the guy with him. All Might hasn’t given his quirk to anyone else because the only suitable person he can see is Izuku, but Izuku basically can’t say no to him so he’s having a crisis. Izuku just thinks he’s there to visit All Mights old mentor and shoot the shit, which is really what they do.

Gran basically just ends up telling him “Kid aint a wallflower, he’ll tell you to fuck off if he doesn’t want it. All Might decides to ask Izuku about it after everything is over.

Izuku ends up interning with Endeavour, along with Todoroki. He never ended up yelling at endeavour, even though he hates the guy. Shouto encouraged him to take the offer bc, 1, Endeavour literally never gives out internship offers and 2, it’d be more fun because that way he doesn’t need to deal with his dad’s bullshit alone.

Endeavour is like “Oh it’s the kidnap kid, your quirk is neat.” And izuku is smiling through gritted teeth like “Th Anks SiRr”

So, starts pretty normal, then the winged Nomu steals Izuku right off the ground. Izuku just says “I’ll be fine! Just keep doing what you're doing, I’ll get myself down.” Endeavour just shrugs like “Ok, I give you permission to defend yourself.” While Todoroki is screaming internally because his new friend is literally being flown away

So the Nomu that was once a really good friend of Izuku’s (not that izuku is aware of that) literally just dumps him somewhere else and leaves. Izuku is confused, really confused, so he starts walking his way back to where he was before he hears a familiar voice.

Guess who it’s Iida, with a serial killer standing right over him. Izuku panics and goes straight into Turn the Lights Off. Without Monoma it only makes it dark, but it’ll have to do.

Thing is: he has a key problem. By virtue of the fact he’s singing, Stain can always hear him. Izuku’s only advantage is that he can see Stain but stain can’t see him, and the darkness means Stain moves more cautiously.

Anyway, in the artificial darkness, he can send a longer text anyway.

Midoriya [7:31PM] stain – [Location Pin Dropped]

So a lot of people, All Might and Aizawa included, f r e a k o u t. Todoroki goes running, Endeavour sends sidekicks with him because he saw his son, normally deadpan, almost chocking on panic as he mutters “Midoriya found Stain.”

Endeavour very much wants to also get Stain but the Nomu are Very Pressing Right Now, so there isn’t much he can do other than try and hurry the fuck up. Torino is kicking around because he could mostly, trying to get a glimpse of All Might’s kid in action, ends up having to kick villain ass. He's not that concerned until he remembers “OH SHIT TOSHI’S BOY”. When he finds Endeavour the man, a little panicked for Endeavour’s standards, yells at him to go to the address bc his son and intern are fighting the fucking hero killer.

Gran Doesn’t think he’s moved so fast since he kicked All for One in the face with Nana 25 odd years ago.

So Stain is kinda pissed bc suddenly he can’t see and someone is singing. He goes to stab Iida but,,, he ain't there anymore, and the singing is fading away. He figures “oh well, lemme get native” the singing changes to a different song. Very quickly he can see, but the singing boy, still singing is rocketing towards him and rapidly changing form.

Monster – dodie: Literally shifts Izuku into a monster. Stain suddenly realises that this is Songbird, talk of the underground, most wanted quirk by villains and quirk traffickers everywhere. This kid, target of villains everywhere, has put himself in their sights just to try and help people.

He thinks maybe Songbird might be one of the good ones.

Oh, an aside? People calling him Songbird sets off hella panic attacks because the only people who do that are people actively trying to kidnap him. And that’s what stain is calling him.

His monster form wavers and he tries to sing through tears and hitching breaths and Stain smiles because he's still curled around Native with his claws out.

Todoroki gets there first and helps defend Iida, Izuku is fighting to keep stain away from Native. The pros are on the way, Izuku is fading fast. Endeavour has been training them hard so he's exhausted and freaking the fuck out, while someone waves swords in his face.

Stain gets him, he loses the monster form. This doesn’t help Izuku’s panic, because now he can’t move and he’s felt this before along with grabbing hands, and dark vans and ropes around his wrists praying someone knew where he was going so someone might know to come for him when he doesn’t get home.

Todoroki sees that and he doesn’t know what to do. Izuku is panicking – the boy who seemed so put together and on top of things s falling apart at the seams. Iida feels horrible. He just wants to go to his friend he's never seen that distraught before.

Todoroki does the only thing he can think of. He sings.

He was never into music before, be after the sports festival he learnt Escapism -the song Izuku sang to him – and singing it back to him is the only thing he can think of doing.

It helps. It really helps, because if there was one thing that never happened when Izuku was taken – it was singing. He calms down just enough to breathe, which is all he needs to do.

The quirk wears off and Izuku throws himself at Stain, the words to Thunder by Imagine Dragons already pouring from his lips and electricity pouring from himself. If Stain touches him, he's toast, even if its via a sword. Izuku just has to avoid thrown weapons.

Izuku gets a hit, the quirk wears off Iida, who rushes in to stop Izuku from taking a throwing knife to the arm. The three of them knock out Stain just as the heroes skid into the alley. Izuku lets out a sob and crumples to the ground, Iida and Todoroki rushing over to him. They both honestly look like they’d bite anyone who got too close. Gran calls All Might who starts hightailing his way over there – Aizawa is also breaking a few traffic laws to reach his pack of injured kids.

They don’t get there in time. Shirigaki, furious that the hero killer went against him, orders Kurogiri to get Izuku. They take Iida and Todoroki for good measure. The heroes watch in horror as the children they were meant to protect vanish under their noses.

Headlines the next day: “UA sports festival finalists defeat Hero Killer – only to be taken by Villains seconds later.”

[nobody-knose--archive]

well, today i figured i didn’t have anything better to do & liveblogged the pingry ep. it’s probably a better stepping stone further into the tally void than incomplete demos, coming right off of complete demos, at least.

-from what i know this one basically includes all the mmmm songs that weren't on complete demos (andrew singing ones wahoo) & the expected demos that didn't end up anywhere else + just a friend. i also believe this one was recorded similarly to complete demos so i really have no clue what to expect for taken for a ride's vocals. anyway here i go

-the bidding sounds impressively professional to start things off, but i suppose humming isn't a terribly complex technique anyway. the intro feels a little longer th

-whoah there if that aint a marked difference in audio quality here we go

-guitars also sound different & i don't remember if this album has steve or ross on it i now realize

-goodness the mixing is wonky for rob's segment. the backing vocals do not need to bounce between channels

-why do they have kinda weird voices for the chorus. sounds like they're trying an accent or something. i can barely recognize who's singing

-the keyboard backing in zubin's segment sounds the same as usual, as in, it sounds so stupidly similar to the questions answered backing music that i'm offended i couldn't pick up they're the same for so long

-less echo on disappear actually. at least they still had the brass section

-still a weird sound on the chorus but maybe i can chalk that up to different mixing & more red

-outro sounds not super different. still very good drumming on display which will give me the push i need to decide it's ross drumming

-however i don't hear him shouting out the auctioneer stuff, and given that it was presented as a video during the mmmm recording, i might assume it was done specially for the mmmm releases, so maybe he didn't drum for this album after all

-it does have a greater similarity to the live performances even if the keyboarding is using a different synth

-well now. that's a real piano

-and as any piano will be when played that low, it's out of tune. very

-and everyone's singing? i can't hear andy in the slightest. this is interesting

-i mean i can certainly hear him doing plenty on the piano. but. it's interesting

-i suppose given the ep's hallmanac description, as a compilation of acoustic/one-take recordings i shouldn't be surprised taken for a ride is this different. but boy is it jarring. sounds incredibly different without the heavy synthesizing and complementary instruments

-barebones certainly. not much more of a way to describe it. that's what i expected just not in this way. i like the sound of this bridge though

-do very much wish i could hear andrew's actual voice. even at acoustic live performances he would sing at the very least. then again, that was years later i suppose.

-and it's only now at the final chorus that i realize, somehow, this is a piano-only song. no guitar, no drums even. that's really interesting. even the album version had some drums & bass

-red's singing isn't as impressive here. not as many high notes. understandable. bitch

-different rhythm on the quick part! bet steve feels lucky he didn't have to drum this part although i am hearing some sort of. pants-slapping? now that would be a sight to behold irl

-and that's the end

-goodness. be born. considering how this song was always & every time performed acoustic live i really expect to hear nothing here i haven't from concert recordings

-we're missing whatever the hell that skittery little shaker is called. alas i am not a percussionist & do not know the name of every auxilliary instrument ever

-rippin it up on the melodica bay be. a suitable replacement for whistling considering that never was all that good live. nobody can compare to bora karaca at whistling

-there's extra bass harmonies on display here. swell

-also no percussion i'm realizing

-da-da-da!

-but yeah normally ross uses brushes on a box/seat drum (also don't know what that's called!) for some good gentle percussion & it's not here. really hoping this won't be a trend because i'm fond of drumming even if it's from stebev himself

-bah (chorus) bah

-wait a minute that's not a bah! that's a doo! big difference! what are you doing rob

-i can tell it's one-take because rob has to take a breath in the middle of that final long bah there

-ooh dropping off the guitar there real quick are you? and not even doing the full outro too. good way to spice things up at the end.

-honestly maybe the reason i & so many other th fans dislike be born so much isn't even the country sound and weird subject matter, it's the fact that this song lacks a whole lot of the variability that might separate it from other music. in the album versions there are violins/fiddles, and the live versions... don't have that. maybe some halfway decent whistling at best. it just is what it is. especially compared to the rest of mmmm- g&e could often be more faithfully recreated on stage, but mmmm got to mix things up most of the time, except for be born. food for thought

-anyway. of all the songs i would expect to be absolutely completely identical (other than be born) the whole world and you definitely takes the cake. a delightful song. i should listen to it more.

-but yeah it was a toy orchestra piece long before a tally hall piece, and toy orchestra was & is nothing but silly little live performances. how on earth could they make this one completely different

-other than. the "punk rehearsal" i've heard of from incomplete demos. that's just. a thing i think

-oh hold on i didn't even listen to the end of be born there was a tiny outro with chat at the end oh that's adorable

-hey i can hear andrew's voice! nice!

-starting off with a full ensemble vocals, all sorts of harmonies in action, and a normal piano instead of a toy piano, so already i'm being proven decently wrong on this song's inability to be greatly altered

-other than that. i kinda like how it sounds as if they're stumbling over their words at points

-boy has andrew's voice changed hasn't it. i know i haven't listened to the solo albums so i'm not exactly one to speak but he really developed his singing a lot over time

-clapping live & not in a studio sure sounds a lot worse, especially when it's like 4 people max doing it and not a whole crowd

-zubin (i'm pretty sure) flexing on us all at the end there. good for him

-ayyyyyyy

-it's the song that's sure to invoke an emotional response out of me >:}

-it's also the song i was convinced had andrew vocals in the background (the badadum's between verses) for a good while. still not 100% certain it's rob instead but it's not like i can ask them themselves

-yeah i'll admit it right here this is the song i listen to when i'm going through emotional turmoil. not this version of the song, and no, i don't mean i listen to i'm gonna win or even the tally hall rock version of this one. i mean i listen to the cover of it from we think we're playing in a band. and that's enough on this subject!

-however given the above information yeah i am pretty familiar with this song already. not a new experience right here

-i greatly appreciate the heavy piano work. it's one of my favorite parts about the song

-oh and i should stop talking about that subject right there as well. actually i think i should just say nothing about this song in general. you'll see why in about uhh pauses video

-this friday or so? damn that's sooner than i thought lucky me

-everything will be fine! i'll be making it through!

-oh hello there. "ALBUM" is not a word beamed directly into my brain with great volume thank you very much

-so. it's the outro to good day done with weird haste. looping. no actual chord pro-

-this is. is this some sort of radio performance? what the hell is going on

-steven!!! hello there thanks for the confirmation & god is it surreal to hear his name truly uttered in the context of red rob zubin andrew. wow

-pingry school spring fling. how the hell have i never heard about whatever the hell this track is before

-wait- is it over? song listed as good day but it's in fact the outro to good day done on. a radio program maybe. and now it's a really strange sounding performance of yearbook

-i genuinely can't tell if there's a filter on rob's voice or if the micro- shit that's loud

-what in the hell is going on is this another radio performance or something? like ok yearbook at least was on songs about girls by listedblack but i really want this to be made clear soon

-all i really think i need to know about yearbook is that it's another rob "heterophobic homophonic" cantor angsty boy band song and. listening to it for the first time her. that impression sure isn't going away

-at least i get to hear andrew twinkling those ivories in the back. got a good sound. even if the mixing here is all sorts of wack. a song this complex should not be performed live with only like one microphone

-alright rob i get it you were in love with a girl- and it's over? ok

-live performance of just a friend holy shit hell yes hell yes hell yes for some reason i thought this would be the studio version but no

-i cannot imagine what this song will sound like with steve on the drums hell yes oh will there be banter will rob forget his lines will red say some random 4-syllable phrase will zubin be the best singer in the whole damn band give me an answer now

-already hearing some banter :}

-they're moving weirdly fast and andrew's already got the piano playing even in the beatboxing part. wowie

-ooh kick it andy do those riffs hell yeah

-"that sounded fishy... zubin sedghi!" i'm in love

-KICK IT ANDY

-AND ZUBIN

-and there's the drums! go stevie. go stevie

-good ness andrew just will not let up on the sick as hell keyboarding will he fukc yeah bro kill it

-rob sounds unbelievably tired for this i'm half expecting him to trip up the lyrics at any moment

-"i don't buy it" "don't gimmie that!" you say it boys. oh classic zubin line right there preserved on an official tally hall recording for all eternity, what a treasure this is

-hm isn't this a bit early to go into the pseudo-breakdown chorus? no it works. andrew still rippin it up of course

-and there's the tambourine bay be!

-buildup to the "oh snap" isn't as intense as it could get in later performances which i will gladly blame in its entirety on steve <3

-boy oh boy does rob's voice just sound generally different here. so young so so young

-shooby-doo-wah. well i had low expectations which were not quite fulfilled but it's technically more than what we got on the studio recording so. i won't complain

-THERE IT IS

-BARBEQUE SAUCE BAY BE

-what a fool i was to pause the moment he said it. silly old me <3

-no, no, thank you for coming! but hold on one second. is there not... one more track? technically not a song, technically something i think i've heard before, but if i take a step over to the tally archive...

-cell phone call.

-circus you say? if i had to guess it's the whole world & you given the 08 version of the song but that's a vague guess. can't think of anything better but my current answer isn't that good on its own

-ah! it's joey jo joseph. this wouldn't happen to be that phone call spoken of that, like, invited joe into the band in the first place, would it? i remember that story from an old bio or something, but it doesn't seem like the type of thing that'd be recorded & put on an album. hard to say

-pj? like a certain rob cator frat dude voice JP!?

-well well well now. i'm not sure what to say. i don't recognize that song they're playing as the outro. it could either be some vague listedblack or miscellaneous early tally hall song lost to the void or a demo. i wouldn't exactly know. anyway that ends the pingry ep. shorter than i thought it be, lucky old me. hope you enjoyed!

[neverlearnedtoread]

Shadow of the Fox

⭐⭐⭐⭐: anime but in book form, so you can feel morally superior to dumb weeaboos who only read subtitles (it’s me. im a dumb weeaboo)

Oh?? 👌😉😏

diversity!!!! vibrantly described japanese-fantasy setting. imo that should almost always be a selling point. sure it’s ‘bare minimum’, but its nice to see authors not go with the default

reads like an anime! *ben wyatt voice* it’s all about converting your enemies into friends along the way so you can fight a big monster when you arrive at your destination!

yumeko took a while for me to warm up to but was a great example of a female character who didn’t need physical prowess to be a leader; she was intuitive, quick-witted, and got people to trust her by being nice (and lying through her teeth. gotta respect the hustle)

the ending - what can i say? i like cliffhangers. besides this trilogy is gonna have Asian dragons show up at some point so there’s no way im letting go now

No.. ❌🤢🤮

lots of jumping around different povs- there’s yumeko and tatsumi and random third-person chapters with hidden players we don’t know anything about yet, so its hard to stay totally invested the whole time

reads like an anime - depending on who you are and what you like, this can be a good or bad thing (see selling point #2). if you’re not into anime or manga, and aren’t familiar with their tropes, this story could feel really disjointed - why team up with a guy who was trying to kill you a second ago? why trust a dude that shady? who is that mysterious guy, and why is he allergic to answering questions directly?

meandering plot - if you don’t like tropes such as ‘characters you meet along the way will join your party for fun’ and ‘random stuff happens on the road’, this book may not gel with your interests

Summary: Every thousand years, some asshole has bullied an all-powerful dragon into doing him a solid - and this millennium’s Dragon Bullying Season is coming up. Everyone is on the prowl for three pieces of an ancient scroll - the dragon’s calling card - hidden in temples across the world. Enter Yumeko - a half-kitsune, half-human who grew up in one such secret scroll-hiding temple; when her home is attacked, she escapes with the prize, hoping to stash it in one of the other temples - and crosses paths with a samurai looking for the very scroll she’s meant to be protecting. In a surprisingly baller move, Yumeko tricks him into escorting her safely to the other temple instead.

Concept: 💭💭💭

I’ll be honest, I read the words ‘fox’ and ‘kitsune’ and added this to my ‘to-read’ list, no questions asked. I love fox-spirits! They’re so pretty and sneaky. A few of the reviews I read of this book were pretty low, and the excerpt at the beginning didn’t fill me with a need to know what happened next, but I thought about the fox-mask on the cover and went ‘it has foxes; it’ll be fine’ and didn’t look back.

Some spoilers under the cut!

Execution: 💥💥💥💥

The beginning was kind of a drag, but once the two main protagonists came together, they countered each other’s more annoying traits - Yumeko’s naivete through Tatsumi’s eyes felt like a novelty, while Tatsumi the ‘No Emotions Allowed Train’ was a little more #mysteriousallure in Yumeko’s POV. I also loved the surprisingly nuanced perspectives on yokai - in Yumeko’s view, they were easy to understand, if overly wary of outsiders - but in Tatsumi’s eyes they had a ‘hidden, shadowy dangers’ vibe, which informed the way he acted around them.

Personal Enjoyment: ❤❤❤❤

Once I shifted into the mindset of anime-typical tropes, I thoroughly enjoyed the characters interacting with whatever crossed their path and learning more about them through quick-throwaway scenes, instead of big, backstory-revealing moments. Yumeko hiding things from everybody she meets and gradually tallying up a bunch of different lies was also fun - she’s not the most experienced at this sort of thing, but you can tell she has a knack for it (it’s barefaced confidence, and also knowing what people want to believe). I liked seeing a character that dealt in trickery and manipulation, but never out of malice - more often than not she did it for someone else’s benefit, and not only her own.

Fave Moment: Yumeko being like ‘i can sense an intruder in your very home!!’ and conjuring a rabbit to stun the emperor’s court into believing she has prophetic powers. live that hustle babe. we stan

Fave Character: Yumeko - but more specifically I liked Tatsumi’s POV of Yumeko. She’s quick-thinking and brash, with a great poker face, and it shows itself in its best light from an outside perspective. We can tell Yumeko’s winging it, but Tatsumi very earnestly thinking ‘how did she know?? that would work?? she’s incredible’ while battling his ~feelings~ was great fun for me to read about, like calm down bro, she’s cute and she got lucky it aint that deep

[tacittherapist]

((HS2 Spoilers under the cut!))

((For all the shit I give the epilogues, it does have its moments. Specifically highlighting this bit of dialogue here: ROXY: you think you choice mattered so much that no one elses could measure up? ROXY: n then what ROXY: did u get what u wanted? ROXY: did your life end and the points got tallied and you came out on top or like what? ROXY: still p much seems like were movin to me ROXY: and you sure dont seem like ur winnin so wheres all this good shit you got that you gotta go around handin out apologies for? ROXY: also damn dude while were at it!! ROXY: u forgot to actually say sorry in that apology! JOHN: no, i didn’t — i just meant... JOHN: i’m sorry for fucking up your life, or making it not— ROXY: i like my life!!! ROXY: i mean it aint perf and i got my share of fuckups n mistakes in there but you dont get to tell me its fucked up ROXY: or that it isnt real or somethin ROXY: its mine!

First: criticism. The writers wield this little section like a crude cudgel. They use it to underscore the weight of ‘canon’. This is the ‘candy’ timeline, so it supposedly ‘weighs less’ than the ‘meat’ timeline, but its characters still have meaningful thoughts and emotions. Here, John supposedly makes a choice that supposedly invalidates a bunch of supposedly important events, and Roxy here blows it all out of the water by claiming she made these choices too and that part of the blame rests with her in the direction her life has taken... which is total dogshit used to justify a bunch of really overt swings in character thematic. Continued here: ROXY: you wished i was one way the whole time we were married ROXY: but i wasnt ROXY: but now that youre all convinced ur the only real boy in a crowd o puppets ROXY: here i am bein me just like you ordered only i did it without your help ROXY: widen ur zoom my man!! ROXY: im not actin like this now because you want me to or bc you dont want me to ROXY: i was bad at standin up for myself then and im learnin to be good at it now ROXY: ive got my own self actualization train ROXY: ur just pullin in to one of my many roxy figures some shit out stations right as i built it JOHN: but... JOHN: you were never like that before i... ROXY: dude ROXY: where tf do u get off trying to decide what is or isnt me being “like me” enuff ROXY: do u think ppl stay the same their whole damn lives or what JOHN: you’ve really never felt like anything about our lives here was... off? ROXY: off from what exactly?? JOHN: the way things should be? ROXY: what does that mean???

Roxy here argues that there is no ‘one right way to be’ as a half-baked wink to the audience that all this gross mischaracterization is intentional and that it diverges so grossly from the established character arcs in order to demonstrate that nothing is set in stone. While technically true, this also makes for some pretty terrible writing.

Roxy was a caring, almost too involved individual before the epilogues. Her ditching Calliope for John and this messy marriage business and just letting Jane warp into a full-blown dictator makes no sense, even couched within the idea that ‘characters change.’ Yes, characters change, but there’s generally a reason for it! And not a shitty deus ex machina reason such as ‘John makes a choice!’ What even fucking happened to Candy Calliope anyway? She just fucked off somewhere? How do you sincerely throw a character away like that and then have the gall to wink at the audience as if what you’ve done makes sense? Changes in character are generally brought on by catalysts in their life! Trauma, joy, death, new settings, new ideas, events! Not... John deciding to eat a plate full of candy. If we had insight into Roxy’s thought process behind ditching Calliope and marrying John and having a kid on a whim, this might be saved. But we don’t even get a glimpse. Instead we’re pawned this shitty excuse for a very glaring departure from what we knew about Roxy. Character development is just that -- development! As in to become more complex or advanced! Roxy has made wrong choices in the past, yes, but her reasoning was laid bare in such a way that those wrong choices made sense for her to make. She then makes different decisions later because she learned from her wrong decisions. This is development! Her character is learning and changing behavior because of the things they’ve been through! Her reasoning for this awful series of bad choices is just... not explained, despite going against a ton of shit Roxy has learned. It’s slipshod. It’s careless. It’s sacrificing the tree to showcase the topper. The audience isn’t vested in this Roxy because she’s seemingly robbed of her agency, and then they’re trying to foist this idea that she somehow still has agency on us as if they didn’t preface the entire timeline with ‘well, all this shit is going to happen because we decided it and no other reason!’

Now: the praise. This bit of dialogue has huge implications for ‘non-canon’ dynamic. No, not ‘non-canon’ in the cheeky way the epilogues and HS2 claim to be ‘non-canon.’ I mean ‘non-canon’ as in this blog that I run and all the blogs that you, the reader, are writing and reading as well. Roxy’s insistence that characters change can swing the other way, too. Characters can develop in bad ways as well! Not bad as in bad writing, but bad as in flawed character reasoning! Suppose what Roxy learned from her time in HS1 was that most things can be solved by unvoiding fix-all solutions into existence? Then we might be able to see her trying to fix the human-troll-population issue by just... making more planets! Or unvoiding some sort of device trolls could wear that inhibits hivemind tendencies! That would be interesting and perhaps morbid to write about!! It would at least track with her past experiences!!! Or better yet: perhaps she actually takes a side against Jane (as she has done in the past) but instead of using their friendship as the moral plating, she went right into sarcastic arguments FOR eugenics to demonstrate how bigoted Jane was being? That’s a very Roxy thing to do!! She could have made the argument that if trolls need eugenics to suppress their violent tendencies, then so should humans! Having read about the Condesce’s eugenic practices during her formative years, this should have been fairly obvious to Roxy that what Jane was suggesting was from the same playbook, at least.

But I digress. What this bit of dialogue really does is give credence to us, the audience, in exploring these stories we’re currently writing for these pre-established characters. YES, canon Rose likely didn’t dabble so thoroughly in game magics, and she likely didn’t have as much anxiety as my Rose. BUT I prefaced my Rose’s current state with a bunch of events that make sense! She missed her rendezvous with the others! She had to float adrift, alone in a broadcast satellite, for nigh on a decade! She’s had a long fucking time to develop all these anxieties and mental illness because that’s what happens when you’re isolated for years! It is a tool I use to express my own anxieties and explore how someone might somehow overcome them! And most importantly: she’s still Rose. She has unprocessed mother issues. She cherishes her friends. She’s more than a bit gay. And she knows when the meta is using her and when it’s not, because she’s had a traumatic experience being used by Doc Scratch as a plot device. And that trauma isn’t going away (well, unless she gets therapy, but given the setting we’re writing... not likely), so she’s going to be overly cautious when it comes to big decisions involving her friends. What she’s not going to do is suddenly abandon everyone she’s departed from because uhhh Jade ate some bread the wrong way or whatever.

tl;dr: What this section of the epilogues/HS2 (well, really just this bit with Harry Andersen, Tavros, and Vrissy that is somehow more interesting than virtually EVERY OTHER PART of HS2) is telling us, the audience, is that it is good to diverge from canon. Non-canon characters will still have very real feelings and face very real consequences for their actions. Just... don’t do it like they did it. All these characters we’re writing for and all these events we’re writing around them... they’re valid! They matter! Just because they’re not canon doesn’t mean others are willing and wanting to read them, and that makes them important! Unfortunately, this also means the epilogues/HS2 are important, but let’s ignore that for now. What I’m trying to say is: be indulgent! Write the things you want to write! As long as they’re well-reasoned, they’re good writing! Characters can be overpowered! They can be cliche! They can have teenage problems as an adult! Just... give them a good reason.))

[dwestfieldblog]

A GOODBYE TO BOHEMIA

(Part 2wo.... MAY.BE)

The fast approaching showdown of Anonymous verses Q Onan...Catma daydreams versus Dogma nightmares. Tyrants, populists and religions trying ever harder in desperation to block the rolling flow of evolution. More money, more power to feed the dreams of immortality of the wannabe (but never truly will be,) ‘Elite’. The I-Ching tarot doesn’t look too good. The Tao index does.

The Supreme Court in the US (i.e. for Us, not you) is close to overturning the statute on abortion rights. Some alleged Christians have been bribing with threats of eternal damnation to get judges to go against the Constitution and the freedom of choice of over half the country. A fundamental right. What’s the plan? To seed a vastly overpopulated country of unskilled workers, with children growing up in poverty despising their parents and damming the church? More absentee fathers, more need for financial help. Perhaps the priests just need more little kids. Once again, for the third time...it is NOBODY else’s business other than the gravid female as to whether she has an abortion.

‘Neither a law nor a court can truly justify the revocation of a human right; the most fundamental of our freedoms are inabrogable. The repression of such an essential liberty may be effective, for a time, but it cannot be legitimate.’ Well said. But, Edward Snowden, this would carry about nine pounds more weight if you were not sheltering in Moscow as Putin’s guest. He aint too big on liberties.

Original sin is the original lie. Back to religion for a giggle...Amuses the Hell out of me to see orthodox priests in Russia blessing missiles used to kill women and children. The very height of high holy compassion and decent Christianity. And Putin’s substitute cock is named Satan 2? Blessed by the Patriarch. God’s spokesman in Moscow. Couldn’t make this reality up. I pray that the witches, magickians, Sufis, Zen Buddhists, Kabbalists , Native Americans, Aborigines, Maori, Gnostics and the real Illuminati are all linking up to calm this insanity before it really metastases. The mass are truly within Chapel Perilous now...

Loved to see the pope (the one in Rome who is retiring) for gently telling Patriarch Kirill (formerly a KGB agent before he saw the eternal love and light of the Redeemer Christ) from the Russian church not to be ‘Putin’s altar boy’ (read bitch) in time for the glorious May 9th charade of a parade. A sentence from the president’ speech went thusly...

‘Our duty is to do everything so that the horror of a global war does not happen again’. Said the bald dwarf who had recently invaded an independent country in search of imaginary Nazi hordes and warned the world of his intent of using nuclear weapons should anyone dare to respond...And then went on to wag his finger at Ukraine for having the temerity to defend itself and kill the aggressors who came to murder them. Hmm. 26 million Russians died in the Second World War and then Uncle Stalin killed another 20 million. Yes, I have been checking from Western and Eastern sources to reach a balanced number between the two. Putin is doing his best with his people at home and his citizens’ brothers and sisters in Ukraine to ratchet up his own tally. Bloody cultural genocide.

310 thousand children have been taken away from their homes in Ukraine, presumably off for ‘re-education’ in the motherland. Thousands and thousands of civilians removed and dropped off in the East of Russia to die or to make babies to slave as second class citizens. And repopulate Putinland because the birth rate has been dropping at a rate which greatly alarms the paranoid septuagenarian. ‘Russia’s destiny and its historic prospects depend on how numerous we will be.’ His pride in the larger than usual grain harvest...thanks to what he stole from the farms in Ukraine, just like the good old days the bald pensioner wants to bring back. Blocking the ports, millions to starve all the faster in Africa, food prices shooting up, empting shelves, oil, gas shortages, civil unrest rising, Bosnia and Pakistan being stirred up for extreme violence.

Meanwhile, here, in the heart of Europe, the barse between the stinking (fill in the word) of the East and the foul (fill in other obvious words) of America. Finland and Sweden to join NATO, for very clear reasons and immediately threatened by the Kremlin. Your fault guys. What did you expect when you invade an independent, sovereign country? Others who share borders will be nervous no? The disgusting Orban, Erdogan and Bolsanaro remain eager to fellate the Baldhead in Moscow with smarmy appeasements.

Coming up on May 35th to the next anniversary of Tiananmen Square , from where actual history has been erased, washed away like the pools of blood, machine gunned students and crushed heads. As they say in China, ‘The loudest duck gets shot’. A chilling proverb for Totalitarian dead souls to use.

Just before the local council elections in Britain Boris (Let the bodies pile high) Gummidge was interviewed and told about a 77 year old woman, a widow, living alone on one meal a day who cannot begin to afford the new heating bills and so travels around by bus most of the day to conserve domestic energy. This bastard’s reply to what he would do to help her, was to say that it was thanks to him that she had a ‘Freedom bus pass’. (Which was another one of his demonstrably nefarious lies, it was started in 1973).  Another member of his cabinet of foulage said that poor folk should just buy own brand food from cheaper supermarkets to balance their budgets. AS IF THEY DONT ALREADY DO THIS. This particular guy claimed 196,000 pounds in expenses in one year. Disgusting hypocrisy is not an exclusively English trait but by Goddess, they do it damn well.

The largest number of mortalities in Europe, 126 police fines for breaking lockdown rules, endless evidence of parties while British citizens obeyed the law, stayed home, unable to visit care homes, hospitals and funerals... and Boris rules out resigning. The utter arrogance of ‘public servants’ who serve none but themselves.  As Bill Burr said, ‘We’re the only species that saves the weak’. Yes, because most understand (‘religious’ or not) that we ALL get weak before we die. The cancer victim in the hospice is us, the homeless guy in the gutter, the human who finally breaks under stress. ‘One island, one ocean world’.

‘In the particular is contained the universal’ eh?

Hurrah, the Queen’s Platinum Jubilee is coming... featuring open top buses representing each decayed decade with acrobats baking a four tier cake, a trapeze artist suspended from a helium balloon with the 96 year old’s image, scientologist top gun Tom Crusing, bloody Ed Sheeran singing the National Anthem, and pensioners on mobility scooters dressed as flamingos. Yes, really.

There will be even deeper financial problems when our eccentricity bill finally becomes due... The learned helplessness of the working class and the utter impotence of the middle class. Voted for an ‘oven ready’ USA chlorinated chicken Brexit for the right to eat even worse food. Yum yum.

The prodigal black sheep, mixed metaphor in the labyrinth is soon going back to where he was born, with an utter sense of finality and dread. In my lifetime so far, there has never been a worse time in which to return to England. Going home to die in several ways., June the ?th will be the first day of the end of my life. Aint it amusing to argue about ‘reality’ when you’re one step away from the street? Ah well, as Beefheart rasped, ‘You couldn’t have done what you did if you knew what you were doing’.

I have loved being in the Czech Republic for over 27 years of love and freedom, beautiful friendships with remarkable people. 350 songs recorded here since 2003, 127 students...Almost half my life so far in an atheistic country with a sense of surreal black humour almost as good as England’s J. Loved the sense of nature and magic, worthwhile traditions kept alive, the unity of families, the lack of class consciousness, the ALCHEMY, the portal on Petrin Hill, Mednik, Michaelsky Forest, Kostelec NCL, Vsetaty and the MUSIC! Thank you deeply to all those I had any kind of relationship with, you were, are and will be loved whether or not we parted well. Students, Blood brothers, Muse sisters and female angels. Wishing you all the peak experiences you psychonauts can handle... CZECH FOREVER.

Condemned to drift or else be kept from drifting...

Whether cleaning the streets, attempting care work or stacking shelves, I will continue to drift from ether to astral, flowing my own way despite the blocks of Aries ice. The Omega Man.  May Aradia scourge my soul for falling to inertia these last three years and return me to my dirty purity. Keep reminding myself of that quote again ‘You gave your life to be the person that you are now...was it worth it?’Yes, it was. Every little thing the Goddess does is magick.

A way, a lone, a last, a loved a long the riverrun...

[aion-rsa]

The Office: The Farm Spin-Off Would Have Wrecked Dwight and Angela’s Ending

https://ift.tt/3yUPU8j

Warning: contains spoilers for The Office seasons 1-9.

“Geese and goats and Schrutes and hijinks at the Bed and Breakfast” is how Rainn Wilson, the actor behind The Office‘s Dwight K. Schrute, summed up proposed spin-off The Farm, which never went beyond its pilot episode. Speaking to fans on a Reddit AMA back in 2012, Wilson called the Dwight-focussed show a terrific, weird yet accessible rural family comedy. Had it been ordered to series, it would have told the story of the Dunder Mifflin paper salesman running a 1,600 acre farm and B&B with his brother and sister.  

“It would have been a really big hit,” The Farm writer-director Paul Lieberstein told ‘The Office Deep Dive with Brian Baumgartner’ podcast in 2021. Lieberstein was co-showrunner on The Office for seasons five to eight, and played HR manager Toby Flenderson on the comedy. He told podcast presenter Brian Baumgartner how disappointed he was when NBC chose not to pursue the project in 2012, blaming a change in management. “I don’t see how someone could not give The Farm a chance. Not give the Dwight spin-off a chance,” he told the podcast. 

The year before, Comcast had bought a controlling share in NBCUniversal, which resulted in a change of NBC Entertainment Chair. The new boss, says Lieberstein, did not champion The Office. “I have to say that they didn’t even know all of the characters’ names at that point, they weren’t really following the show. I think we were just a disappointing line item at the time.” 

Lieberstein had planned for the spin-off to develop into a mockumentary about the hardships of running a small family farm “at a time when they’re being squeezed out”, he told The Daily Beast in 2018. “It would have old characters and new, and they’d have kept the B&B going. It would have been a lot of fun.” 

The spin-off’s major new characters were introduced in the unaired pilot, 12 minutes of which were chopped up and edited into season nine The Office episode ‘The Farm’. A pre-Silicon Valley Thomas Middleditch played Dwight’s unlikely brother Jeb, a hapless drifter who’d stumbled into Californian weed farming. Roswell’s Majandra Delfino played their pseudo-intellectual, amateur poet, Chicago-dwelling sister Fannie, single mother to nine-year-old city mouse Cameron, played by Mom’s Blake Garrett-Rosenthal. The 12 minutes of the pilot shown laid the groundwork for Dwight to take ‘Cammy’ under his wing and school him in Schrute tradition.

‘The Farm’ episode also introduced a new love interest for Dwight in the form of Esther Bruegger (played by writer-director Nora Kirkpatrick). Bruegger’s character was an attractive, younger-than-Dwight sprout farmer from a neighbouring farm, who recurred as Dwight’s girlfriend on season nine of The Office until Dwight and Angela finally reunited and went on to marry in the series finale. If The Farm had come to fruition though, that series finale would have been entirely different.

Angela Kinsey – the actor behind The Office’s uptight, judgmental accountant Angela, who had a long-running secret affair with Dwight – was not part of The Farm’s cast. After the end of The Office, Kinsey was lined up to star alongside her real-life pal Rachael Harris in FOX sitcom pilot Dirty Blondes, a post-divorce female friendship comedy by Black-Ish’s Stacy Traub. When that didn’t happen, Kinsey starred alongside The Daily Show’s Rob Riggle in the pilot for oddball family comedy The Gabriels. That one didn’t go either, but if either had gone to series, then Kinsey obviously could not have also been part of The Farm, meaning that ‘Dwangela’ wasn’t always destined to be Dwight’s romantic endgame. Perhaps Kinsey would have made Lilith Sternin-in-Frasier-style guest appearances in the spin-off, but it seems that she and baby Philip weren’t always intended to be Dwight’s big story.

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The original plan, if The Farm had gone to series, was for the backdoor pilot to have slotted in around episode five of The Office’s final season. At that point, Dwight had given up on Angela after (wrongly) learning in the season premiere that he wasn’t the biological father of her son. Rainn Wilson’s character would have been written out of the show around the mid-season point, leaving Dunder Mifflin for an Angela-free future. 

Somewhat counter-intuitively, Dwight would also be leaving for a Mose-free future. Mose Schrute was Dwight’s strange cousin, a recurring character who lived at Schrute Farms and popped up to add weird vibes whenever the story ventured in that direction. Any fan would have expected Mose to be a cert for The Farm spin-off, but that was an impossibility. Mose’s character was played by one of the show’s writer-producers Michael Schur, and originally intended as a seldom-seen joke. The character though, proved a fan favourite, so the team kept finding ways to bring him back. 

At the end of season four, Mike Schur and Greg Daniels left The Office to run its first ever spin-off, a city council-focused comedy that eventually became Parks & Recreation. In 2013, Parks & Rec was entering its fifth season, and there was no way that Schur would have time to run that show and continue playing Mose. Schur told Aint It Cool in June 2012 that Mose’s absence from the series proper would be explained, “and that the explanation was too funny to reveal ahead of the pilot’s airing.” A tragic farm-related accident? Scouted for a new season of Amish in the City? Or perhaps Mose finally elopes with his lady scarecrow… we’ll never know.

When NBC declined to pick up The Farm, the decision was made in good enough time for Dwight to be re-inserted as a lead into the last half of season nine, and for the series finale to be written around his and Angela’s wedding. An unintended victim, showrunner Greg Daniels told fastcompany.com in 2013, was British actor Catherine Tate who played Nellie on The Office:

“The toughest part was for Catherine Tate. There was going to be this zone where Rainn had left and Ed Helms was doing The Hangover [Part III] and we had talked to Catherine about the character of Nellie kind of filling the gap and being the driver of comedy A-stories in that period. Then when The Farm didn’t go, Rainn kind of came back and filled that role. So I think we kind of wasted a brilliant comedian this year a little bit with Catherine Tate.”

Greg Daniels, 2013.

‘The Farm’ half-hour eventually aired as episode 17 of the season, which introduced Dwight’s new girlfriend Esther just in time for Angela’s marriage to her closeted gay husband Senator Robert Lipton to have fallen apart, creating a mini love triangle. Who would Dwight choose, a young teutonic beauty who knew her way around a combine harvester, or his ‘Monkey’?

Dwight chose Monkey, and promised to raise her son Philip despite not being his biological father. That’s when Angela told Dwight that she’d faked the DNA results and Philip was, as suspected, his son. ‘Faked the results’ isn’t quite how editor-producer David Rogers put it in this 2013 interview with Office Tally. Rogers explained that lines had been cut from scenes suggesting that when Dwight took a used diaper from the garbage to test Philip’s paternal DNA, he accidentally picked up one used by Jim and Pam’s baby or another child, hence the lack of a match. In the end, that explanation was dropped to simplify things. 

Dwight and Angela’s one-year-later wedding story in the series finale gave The Office the perfect premise to reunite the show’s cast, many of who had left Dunder Mifflin for pastures new. It let Steve Carell make a deliberately low-key cameo (he didn’t want to draw focus from the main event) as Michael Scott, Dwight’s surprise best man. It let Jim and Dwight show their brotherly affection for each other, after years of enmity. And it gave Dwight and a partially redeemed Angela – who’d been brought low by the end of her marriage and lost some of her sharper corners in the process – a happy ending. Had The Farm happened, all of that would have been different.

Some think that that NBC’s decision not to move forward with the spin-off was no bad thing. When writer of The Office: The Untold Story of the Greatest Sitcom of the 2000s Andy Greene was asked about the defunct series in this Jeremy Roberts interview, he clearly thought it was for the best:

“Everyone I spoke to felt it was a bad idea. I agree. You don’t want to spend that much time with Dwight on the farm. He’s funny at an office with people that are his total opposites. “The Farm” is a salvaged failed pilot that they chopped up into a regular episode because NBC didn’t want to pick it up. The whole thing was just a colossally wrong-headed idea and one of the worst Office episodes ever.“

Andy Greene, 2020.

Dwight works so well as a character in The Office because he’s the chaotic element in Dunder Mifflin’s everyday mix, the unpredictable wildcard in a place of crushing predictability. Surround Dwight K. Schrute with characters as unhinged as he is, and he loses his unique power. If The Office is ultimately about – as Pam says in the show’s last ever line – seeing beauty in ordinary things, then The Farm, with its oddball characters and outlandish Schrute family traditions, would have been anything but ordinary, so maybe wouldn’t have captured the same beauty.

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The Office: An American Workplace is available to stream on Netflix in the UK, and on Peacock in the US.

The post The Office: The Farm Spin-Off Would Have Wrecked Dwight and Angela’s Ending appeared first on Den of Geek.

from Den of Geek https://ift.tt/3i8hwjN

[spacevampires]

just saw this oops- used my big ol everything playlist that's been building since i was 15

aint no rest for the wicked - cage the elephant

who are you now - sleeping with sirens

stay the night - green day

the requiem - linkin park

lyra - myrne

still wide awake - anthony amorim

the bidding - tally hall

peacemaker - green day

stronger monsters - toby fox

wild one - green day

idk that many people here so idk who to tag oops-

@dumbest-ass and @dearpercocetmp3 both tagged me<3

Shuffle your playlist and list the first ten songs. (I used my Spotify liked songs, so some of this is older )

Hey Heartbreaker - Dream Wife

uuu - Field Medic

Desolation Row - My Chemical Romance

Wet -  Dazey and The Scouts

J.A.R. (Jason Andrew Relva) -  Green Day

No Glory in the West - Orville Peck

Call This # Now - The Garden

I Don't Care - Fall Out Boy

Any Place (Growing Up) - Ramshackle Glory

Keasbey Nights - Streetlight Manifesto

@happylittlemasksalesman, @demolitionnshawty, @coffinhug, @mychemichalpisskink, @sean-reblog, and anyone else who wants to participate …ᘛ⁐̤ᕐᐷ

[a-mere-ninja-blog]

Week 2

Day 7:

Doesn’t feel like Monday! Feels like an extension of Sunday. But with things to do. 

Received video call from friend who is bored at home. Interrupted constantly by her 3 year old either trying to kill herself, beating her little sister over the head with a metal pole or trying to run off with me (the phone) to show me things around the house. Grateful I only have a grumpy cat.  

Ad mowed the lawns whilst I worked. Got actual fomo. Because it’s sunny. And he’s outside. With something to do. FOMO! ABOUT MOWING THE LAWN! He had to save washing the cars for me so we could enjoy it together. Never washed a car in my adult life. Now feels like a treat. 

BoJo announces lockdown, without actually saying the word. Only allowed out once a day to exercise. Feels like doing time for a crime I didn’t commit.

Day 8:

Have upgraded to gym wear this week. Mainly because this week’s pjs are shorts and it’s cold in my kitchen. Opt for my galaxy leggings and a hoody. 

Work flies by today in a blur of calls. Lots going on to support aviation and keep national infrastructure going.  

Do workout in garden & practice my skipping. Attempt to do one footed boxer skip. Still determined to come out of isolation fit. Turn to Youtube. Manage to get a basic skip going. Pretty chuffed. Film self. Not look remotely like Anthony Joshua. Miffed. Clearly a bad tutorial. 

Long call with oldest friend. Never fails to cheer me up. 

Redo the gel polish on one hand. Currently pink on the left and gold on the right. Save the other hand for tomorrow. Gotta have something to look forward to. 

Before bed Ad puts big red cross through today’s date on the calendar. Has decided he wants to keep a tally of the days in lockdown. Like a prisoner. Is really chuffed with his idea. Day one down. 

Day 9:

Work is another blur of calls. Had video call with director whilst hair in a pineapple. Never gonna complain about a bad hair day or feel self conscious at work again.

Ad busy with jobs in the garden. Very happy with his man tools until he cuts through the wire of his saw. That cut his fun short.  

Attempted a run with Ad. Well a jog. Didn’t go too far as Ad’s torn calf is still recovering. But probably did twice the distance with all the zigzagging across the road to avoid people.  

Think about painting nails on other hand. Can’t be arsed. Might leave them mismatching. Aint nobody gonna see anyway. 

Another big red cross. Day two down. 

Day 10:

Work. Still trying to publish FAQs from the last few days on our website. Two calls with policy debating the use of ‘shall’ versus ‘should’. Please this one is not a video call.

[krakenator]

CHAPTER 8 aka “Here comes the sun”

SPOILERS are sprinkled around extremely liberally for The Property of Hate

Masterpost here

“Day 4 everybody! The sun is shining, the tree’s a sun, and it’s time to start a new- 

*gasp* the tree’s a sun

THE TREE’S A SUN

*wicked witch voice* ITS MEEEEELTING

oh very funny tellyman

and i SWEAR TO GOD if this is some kind of sick  FORESHADOWING where Hero and RGB get separated and don’t appear on the same pages as each other-

oh hey i didn’t notice the Deer on this panel; RGB’s hanging onto its ear

So if the tree was sick and it’s also the heart of the sun... could we say the tree had heart disease?

ok and it also turns out that the whole deer thing is because ‘hart’ is another term for them so could we ALSO say that the tree is a heart of harts?

Izzit me or does Assok’s speech here have greeny-yellow mixed in there? …TOby???

The entire look of the tree and RGB doing a slip’n’slide on it implies a very... meaty texture to me so uh congrats mod thanks i hate it

OH FUC I KNOW EXACTLY WHAT THIS REMINDS OF

MOTHERFUCKING MEAT CIRCUS AAAAAAAAA-

This entire page is huge fucking mood. That’s me @the world in my head every time I’m about to do something Stupid n’ Sketchy™

its also the first time we see the frankly DELIGHTFUL dynamic of RGB being like “oh god oh fuck why” and Hero going “YEEEEEEEAAA”. Hero loves rollercoasters and RGB won’t be dragged on one for anything less than certain death otherwise. 

LOOKIT that big grin. she seems to smile WAY more in the latter half of the current comic and honestly. Yes. we need more of that

Oh deer. What a staggering outcome. Guess we’re getting right to the hart of the matter huh.

So RGB asks how Hero knew it was sick, and the answer was it had no leaves- the tree’s by the Pool of Tears in chapter 2 during the daytime didn’t have leaves either, but began to grow more near the end of it- are those tree’s sickened as well? OH- this could explain why the Fears were able to wander around in such a forested area

Have to wonder… tree’s are powerful. What could stop one from dreaming like that?

OH. OF COURSE. RGB’s already given us the answer- Nothing. The gooey stuff that was coating the tree, the [-----], is just another form of Nothing! Even more damningly, biting through the strand so the sun could balloon away renders Hero’s tongue temporarily numb. 

“You didn’t swallow any did you”- oh motherfucker that’s foreshadowing to when Hero really does accidentally swallow Nothing in the Elastic Valley storm, which erodes her voice from black text to white

So the next question is why did the [-----] melt so SUDDENLY? Black was left behind from Hero’s Fun Impalement Adventure, which smacks far more of Fear stuff than dream/nightmare residue, both of which are colorful, yet Dreams have the healing properties and Hero dreaming in the tree may have even helped the thawing

going on the assumption black = Fear shenanigans, have we found something stronger than Nothing? is this- oh come on. is this a rock-paper-scissors scenario?

Nothing beats Trees, Trees beat Fears, Fears beat Nothing?

on that note I should point out that Hero’s night of rest and dreaming has indeed closed back up her schism

absolutely everybody: how the FUCK did that DUMBASS-

and like they all know it’s THAT dumbass. they all look at the BULLSHIT happening in the sky and say “i don’t know how but i KNOW RGB is in the thick of that nonsense”

RGB rekted counter = 4

and promptly rekted yet again (5)

Ok, we confirm that [-----] is an insulator- a weaker form of Nothing, then. Not enough to destroy the sun-tree, but definitely enough to encase, sicken, and weaken it.

K but [------] as censorship, anyone?

!! Assok’s voice is numb too. How did I miss this bit of the story, did I just skim over it last time? Assok’s voice is the way it is because it’s numb, it could only have gotten numb by chomping on [-----], Assok came out of a crack in the [-----] to investigate Hero’s crying... my god

im such a dummy i finally get it. Assok’s been chipping away at the [-----] trying to keep the sun alive

kids are honestly such little shits; mod really nails this aspect of Hero directly on the head

truly they are made for each other- one shit kid and one bastard man.

OH OKAY I thought Assok threw themselves at RGB’s face in retaliation for yelling at Hero for essentially tazing him but that’s not it- its STATIC CLING

And tally that 6 for the RGB ‘slapstick-comedy Bad Man gets thrown around’ counter

ITS JULIENNE! Aint NOBODY got ANYTHING on her KNIFE FEET

fuckin. the sound effects. step+stab = stap. amazing

bruh i love her speech. i look at it and i taste cherry chocolate. even the shards around the boxes and that haphazardly make speech tails looks like chocolate shavings

Julienne and Melody’s designs are both INCREDIBLE tbh. julienne and click are probably my favorites out of the entire cast. you look at them and you INSTANTLY what they are about

and yet there are surprises

...... shitpost idea

and the candyfloss poke at my head, no fun! i said Julienne- mmgh!- stop it now

RGB looks like he has wings this entire page and I think that’s beautiful. the entire ‘fight scene’ between him and Julienne is utterly fantastic

Hero just calmly going fishing. Serenely stares down the knife Julienne tries to stab through her upon Jules realizes RGB’s gone and kidnapped ANOTHER WHOLE KID but relenting the INSTANT Hero says hello, pats, and flatters her

this chapter is really delivering on the “RGB gets slammed around” aspect of my TPoH enjoyment. I didn’t think we’d hit double digits this quick but that makes 10

Melody, bass-boosted: MY WIFE

as a musician i adore Melody with my entire being and i would die for her. every time i read her FORTE i’m assaulted with the auditory memory of myself and the rest of the trumpet section seeing a “triple forte” note written in our music sheets and as one blasting it in exactly the way the composer surely intended: discordant chaos

aaaaa her foghorn blast includes sheet music in the background!! i wonder from what piece

her speechbubbles be yellow, with short, stout tails and a circular box

is there anything better than seeing just the barest hint of Hero at the top of one panel before she slams into RGB in the next?

Assok’s QUADRUPLE FORTE on the other hand sounds like 50 CHILDREN SCREAMING THEIR OWN COMMENTS AT ONCE FOR A SOLID THIRTY SECONDS

it’s all stuff we’ve heard before looks like: “snice”, “koh ping”, “eediotic”, “damninably frah ghile”, “j ustryin toolwek affrew”, “justav to trusttmi”

dsvjkfkfhh- special fuckin shoutout to “AI DOOHAIT TOOHAFF TORAIMSMA VOYCE” for being the ONE thing in all caps aka the time RGB, uh, raised his voice

join me next time for some QUALITY DUNKING ON RGB. just absolutely roasting him

[sweetnestor]

crankgameplays livestream 4/2/17

just a tiny lil recap (6 pages on paper to be exact)

he doesn’t know what to do, still getting his shit together

“I just wanted to say sahh dude” (shoulda kept a ‘saahh dude’ tally tbh)

said he wasn’t feeling good, hes got tummy aches

didnt feel like recording, so he streamed instead

doesnt really want ppl donating to the channel, but he appreciated it

someone said they wanted more original songs from him and he was confused

he started playing overwatch

on the Hit it fergie video: now he really wants ppl to stop tweeting him about it, he did the video just to shut them up

ppl are spamming ‘soft and neat’ thanks for your contribution phandom

apparently hes horrible at overwatch

ppl want him to play ukelele but he aint got one, the one he had in the 12hr solo stream was kathryns apparently

he hardly plays overwatch and frequently gets killed

“I’m an overwatch king dude!! Saahh…”

tbh its much calmer than his videos,,,,, voice is much deeper,,,, more relaxed,,,, good for the soul

so many “sahh dude”s

he forgot to tweet out the stream link oops

hasnt watched the walking dead in a while, he fell behind

used to watch twd with his dad a lot

he also misses his parents a lot

he talks about how supportive they were in everything he did, they never said one negative thing

they would drive him 45min back and forth for gymnastics :’)

he also cried while writing out a long birthday message to his dad :’’’)

“balls balls balls balls” -in the midst of a battle or something

“how did i die?” -ethan, when he dies

Ethan, brian and G are doing a panel for indy popcon and hopefully a m&g

he likes that ppl feel welcome here in the community

“Ew gross girbeagly? Stupid…” idk the context i just wrote it down lmao

“You guys really dont have to donate!!!” x23442345

will probably make more battle cats videos

he misses maine

doesnt like pacific time bc its super hard to schedule things and videos

had a road trip to canada w his bro just before he moved to la

He’s not going to do another snapchat video

In a dry spell when it comes to games lately, hopefully it stops soon bc theres new games coming

Robin is watching apparently???

Ethan says pax south is much more chill than pax east

He regrets not taking the time to reupload all his videos from the old channel onto the new one

Theres apparently 700 privated videos on the old channel

Deciding what music to play in the background

“Big jazz boy, yeah thats what i am, you know it”

*burps into the mic*

He put on the flower crown “i am adorable” :’)

Says we should listen to the podcast “the comedy button”

He listens to a lot of podcasts actually

Ethan does not live with mark, and he doesnt film in his office

Fave thing abt maine is his friends :’)

Once he moved away he really started to appreciate the town he came from

Probably gonna keep the blue hair for the rest of 2017

He likes ppl cosplaying as him

Someone asked if hes dating kathryn and he said no

“I’ll tell her about that, she’ll laugh”

Dancing to the music (this happens throughout the stream)

Someone asked if he could help them name their puppy

“Omg i love puppies i hope you love her forever and give her treats tell her i said hi!!”

talked about his pupper cooper (rip) and that she was his best friend

he really wants a girl dog, but he knows hes too busy rn to take care of one

Had a slight allergy to dogs but it probably went away over time

he’s playing with a silver ball

If youre mean and bullying ppl then u dont belong in this community, be respectful!!

says the ball is somewhat like a stress ball

basically he constantly needs to be doing something with his hands due to adhd

He did not go to college, took a gap year,,,, then another one,,,, then la happened

Considered going to film school and if he had time he’d want to do a short film

He doesnt think he could have a job that isn’t creative

He’ll think about doing a tour of his place,,,, possibly,,,, one day

Fave 21p song,,,,,,, heavy dirty soul,,,,,,,, maaybbee

He’s a scorpio (i only put this bc for some reason i thought he was a libra)

Mixed feelings about the ‘dark side’ character thing: he doesn’t want to come off like he’s copying jack & robin, but he does like the communities ideas

wants to be more consistent with trash goblin podcast

Crankgameplays name origin: dad owned a company called ‘crank’ & ethan had a poster of it in his room and then he and andrew were deciding what to name the channel, eth saw the poster and then bam

thanked the ppl who donated to the channel (lots of name butchering)

And thats what you missed on glee