#TV is back anime is saved fellas !!!

[mazojo]

Oh we are SO back

[phoenixkaptain]

Do you mind if I ask your top 10 favorite characters (can be male or female) from all of the media that you loved (can be anime/manga, books, movies or tv series)? And why do you love them? Sorry if you've answered this question before.....Thanks...

I think I have answered this question before, but I don’t mind because I like talking about ny favourite characters!

(And my favourite characters change hourly, so-)

I can’t rank them, I love them all equally, but my current favourites:

1. Luo Binghe from Scum Villain Self-Saving System. I can’t help it. Fanon likes to paint him as comical, at times, but I love how competent he is! He just… would like to be a housewife. Preferably his Shizun’s housewife… and, he is, as Shen Qingqiu says himself, the type of person to smile to your fave while sliding a knife in your back and I love that for him

2. Quan Yizhen from Heaven Official’s Blessing. He throws a bed at Pei Ming. He’s obsessed with his shixiong and beats up his own followers for badmouthing him. He’s smart enough to realize that everyone thinks he’s stupid, therefore he can use obvious tricks because nobody thinks he can fool them. There’s a scene where Xie Lian and Quan Yizhen both praise something for being beautiful (I think it was the Brocade Immortal’s fighting) and even Ling Wen is like “You know I’m trying to kill you right?” He’s great :)

3. Tim Drake from DC Comics. The third Robin, the one most similar to Batman, the world second greatest detective. Can sneak up on Superman and managed to stalk Batman. Was going through a lot and tried to clone his best friend. The quintessential perfectionist. I headcanon that he plans his dates out on corkboards and no one will convince me otherwise. Also, his relationship with Ra’s Al Ghul in his Red Robin run was comedy gold.

4. Artemis Fowl from the books of the same name (I’ve never seen the movie and like to pretend it doesn’t exist). Fakes his own death multiple times and steals gold from fairies and is altogether a criminal mastermind. There’s a scene in the first book where Holly Short (the other main character) tells him to stay put and she’ll bring him back a lollipop (mocking him). She leaves and he mutters “But I don’t like lollipops.” Also gets made fun of for having a girly name, which I can relate to since I was made fun of for having a masculine name.

5. Shen Qiao from Thousand Autumns. God, he’s just the best. He is absolutely infuriating. He has the patience of ten thousand men. Began the book waiting for him to snap, then realized that I didn’t want him to lose his temper because that would make Shen Qiao sad and Shen Qiao deserves all the happiness in the world. His martial brother pushed him off of a fucking mountain. Yan Wushi names a deer after him. Have you ever seen baby Shen Qiao? Qiao-er?? The cutest little fella, the sweetest bean, has never done anything wrong in his life.

6. Marth from the Fire Emblem series. There’s a scene in the remake of the first game where, after you recruit one of the characters during a fight, Marth can talk to him. The character is like “I understand if you don’t trust me.” Marth: “Why wouldn’t I trust you?” “I literally tried to kill you fifteen minutes ago.” Marth: “The past is in the past.” Marth is just the most polite boy. He was the first male character to be included in the FEH Bridal Event and he is… so cute…

7. Mara Jade from Star Wars. Specifically Mara Jade in the Thrawn trilogy. She is loyal to Karrde because he was nice to her. She wants to kill Luke so bad, but she can’t because if she doesn’t find out why he’s so weird before she kills him, she’ll never be at peace. Darth Vader’s coworker. “Who’s this “son of Vader” you keep mentioning?” -Mara Jade, while sitting next to the son of Vader they keep mentioning. Mirrors Anakin and I just love that for her (especially since he went good -> evil and she went evil -> good, they mirror each other babeyyy) She’s like “Are you sure you don’t want me to murder this creepy old guy?” The straightman in her and Luke’s relationship and it is so funny that the literal ex-Dark Jedi is the normal one.

8. Hiwatashi Nazuna from BNA. She is in love with Michiru. Anyone else: “Your agent is weird.” Nazuna: “Shut up you don’t know what you’re talking about.” Michiru: “Your agent is weird.” Nazuna: “You make a great point and I’m going to start distancing myself from him right away.” The trickiest trickster to ever trick trickers. She is willing to kill for Michiru and it’s honestly very relatable.

9. Kudou Shinichi from Detective Conan. The dumbest man alive. Also the most dramatic man alive. Obsessed with Sherlock Holmes and infodumps about him constantly. Is terrible at pretending to be a child, literally nobody is convinced, but Conan is so cute, how can they say no to him? Has the strongest moral compass of any character (aside from maybe Shen Qiao) and the world is lucky his moral compass is so strong, because if he decided to be evil, no one would be able to stop him. My favourite moments are the ones where innocent little Conan-kun smiles and says horribly dark things that even make the murderer scared. Absolutely terrifying, at seventeen and seven, good for him.

10. Tianlang-jun from Scum Villain Self-Saving System. I know it’s another character from Scum Villain, but hear me out. He is absolutely insane. He decides to destroy the world because everyone thought he wanted to. He barters with Su Xiyan over how attractive his face is. He asks Zhuzhi-lang if he thinks he’s ugly. He is a pure-hearted innocent maiden and also the most powerful character in the book. He only loses to Binghe because he was stuck under a mountain for over a decade, and his body is rejecting his demonic qi and falling apart. He makes a coffin look like a throne and is intimidating as fuck, then asks Shen Qingqiu to help him up and his arm pops off. And he just says “Dang. It happened again, Zhuzhi-lang.” My favourite red herring of all time, I just want to pat-pat his head.

These are the current ones. Shout-out to Yan Wushi from Thousand Autumns, who spends the entire novel fucking with Shen Qiao then has the terrible realization that he fell in love with Shen Qiao. Also, he made a very convincing woman. Also also, as I was looking through my notes on Thousand Autumns, I was reminded that he has the truly remarkable ability to ruin Shen Qiao’s reputation without even being present. Amazing! Second shout out to Bai Rong, also from Thousand Autumns, who gets a crush on Shen Qiao and offers to become his sugar daddy. A lot of characters try to seduce Shen Qiao, but Bai Rong was my favourite because she was just so… cute about it.

I like a lot of characters… Thank you for your ask :)

[henryobsessed]

The Veterinarian and the Werewolf - Chapter 8

Word Count: 1879

Warning: trigger - hunting, and demeaning verbal abuse.

A/N thanks again to my beautiful @sillyrabbit81 for your editing and @amberangel112 for your encouragement.

Chapter 8

Henry could not understand why Jessie was still considering going out with this jerk. He huffed at Joe’s words and was pleasantly surprised at Tom’s reaction. Pleased to have someone in his corner, he nuzzled into the young man’s arms. It felt nice, an odd feeling of loss and regret pulled at his soul. He hadn’t seen his nephew in five years, he would be fifteen years old now four years younger than Tom. Memories of their last time together flooded his mind, the feel of his hands running through his fur. Even then he had refused to change, sadly his nephew had never known him in Human form.

The packhouse was large, made of local stone it would be considered menacing to outsiders. But for those invited in, it was a house filled with love. They had found Henry and his nephew Adam just outside their forest line, half-starved, dehydrated and desperate for care. The pack doctor had tended to Henry whilst one of the pack's mothers had shared her milk with the little pup. Adam had captured the mother’s heart and at Henry’s approval had adopted him into the pack. Henry had grieved the loss of his only kin but been so grateful to them. He knew he could not look after the little one, not with his heartbroken in pieces.

Over the next ten years, he had come and gone from the house checking up on Adam, watched as he grew strong, not only physically, but emotionally he had developed into a beautiful soul. Their last time together they had sat just like he was now with Tom. He had curled up next to Adam, his head in his lap, Adams fingers running through his fur. “I wish you could change for me Uncle, I see all the other dads and sons playing together and I love the idea that when I change next year we can run together. Then I can finally talk to you and hear your voice back. But I want to know what you look like, to be able to hug you like I see that others hug their dads.” His face had added to Henry’s grief looking so heartbroken and longingly at him. He had tried at that moment, had attempted to honour his request but his human side was so lost, hidden in pain. He had left the house that day, knowing even if it broke his heart, he needed to let his nephew grow with his new pack and not be held back by him.

Now nestled against Tom he regretted that decision. He heard a chuckle soft and happy. “Well look at you two. I would never have guessed Wolfy could be so comfortable with another human. I haven’t seen him like that with anyone except with me. What’s your secret Tom?” Her bright eyes landed on Tom who had continued to scratch behind Henry’s ears.

“I don’t know Miss Jessie, but I have always loved wolves, well any kind of animal really but especially wolves.”

She seemed thoughtful as she eyed them both making Henry wonder what she had planned. “Tom, are you free tonight? I have a date and I really don’t want to leave Wolfy alone again.” Henry felt Tom stiffen. Wondering what was wrong with the request, he moved his head to look up at the boy.

A brief look of disapproval flashed in his eyes before they softened as he looked down and saw Henry watching him. “Yes, Miss Jessie. I would love to spend more time with this beautiful boy.” Internally he chuckled at Tom’s words, if only he knew he was twelve years older than him.

That afternoon Henry, Jessie and Tom spent out in the garden. Tom seemed to fit beautifully into their friendship group kneeling beside Jessie as they planted new flowers and shrubs where they had pulled up the weeds. Together, Henry dug the holes, Tom placed the plants and held them in place whilst Jessie filled the soil around them. Henry enjoyed hearing the light conversation between his Mate and his new friend until it became heavier. “So, Tom, when did you begin to love wolves? I know your father traps them, so I’m interested as to why you don’t follow his belief.”

Tom continued to work, as a gentle hum was heard working up from his throat. “I know why Dad does it, although I don’t think he is correct. He blames the wolves for his loss of cattle, but I haven’t seen that many around. The wild dogs are more to blame but he won't listen. They have a group that meet purely to discuss the wolf problem, but in my whole life, the only large group I have seen was back when I was four. It’s the first and last time Dad allowed me to come to a hunting party. Mom was horrified that he was taking me, but I wanted so much to be with Dad, and he wanted me to be just like him.”

Henry shuddered as the boy spoke as if by some force of nature, he knew that he was about to hear what had happened that day. He also sensed the grief radiating off the boy, wanting to calm him he pushed his body into Tom’s side. Nuzzling his head as if to say, “It's ok, I’m here for you.” Tom let out a heavy chuckle as if he had heard Henry’s voice.

He sat back looking down at Henry as he spoke, “Thanks Wolfy, you would think that I would not remember something that happened that long ago, but it's imprinted in my mind. They had been tracking a pack that had only just entered the area, convinced the rest of the ranchers that they were a risk to our lively hood, that we couldn’t let them nest here. So, the best of their marksman left, when we found them all, sitting around a tree, curled up sleeping, all I wanted to do was go play with the cuddly animals. Dad kept pulling me back holding me still and quiet. I didn’t understand until the loud bangs began.”

Tom’s voice wobbled at this point and Jessie who had been silent up till this time also came closer. She pulled him into her side, her arm encasing his thin body as his shoulders began to shake. “I started screaming as I saw a single wolf with a baby on its back running away, Dad aimed for it but I managed to push the barrel up making him miss. I got the thrashing of my life that night. I couldn’t sit for a week, but it was worth it. I was never allowed to come again after that, not that I wanted to. It took a while, but Dad eventually began to trust me enough to check the traps. I am glad too because it meant I could help this fella.”

Jessie held the boy as his sobs subsided. Henry was trying to hold his anger in, these were the people who had destroyed his family. And yet this one boy had not only saved him once but twice, his gratitude was the only thing stopping him from wanting to go rip the throats out of the group. Ignorance and fear were the driving forces that ended his family, if only they knew the wolves would only ever take a sick animal, and sometimes the young, never the strength of the herd. They would never kill without need. But the wild dogs he had seen were giving us a bad name.

Jessie's voice interrupted his thoughts, the softness not hiding the grief in her own. “Was that near here Tom?” How did Jessie know?

“Yes, Miss Jessie, by the tall tree in the middle of the forest.”

She silently picked up the tools, both animal and human watching her, wondering what she was thinking. Sighing she stood up, “Come, it’s getting dark and I need to get ready for this date.” She walked silently back into the house. The boy and the wolf looked at each other before both followed.

Jessie fixed dinner for Tom and Henry then left to dress, leaving the pair to their own devices. Tom seemed quiet after revealing his early childhood trauma and Henry was eager to help calm the boy. After eating, he plodded into the living room, jumped up on the couch and yipped in Tom’s direction. Chuckling, Tom responded, “You want to watch some TV boy?” Nuzzling the remote, he yipped eagerly hoping to distract the boy from his thoughts.

Tom settled next to him and picked up the remote, they settled on watching a rerun of M.A.S.H before they both heard the clicking of heels and the rapping of knuckles on the front door. Open-mouthed both Henry and Tom sat dumbstruck as Jessie walked down the stairs in a light yellow sundress her dark hair flowing softly twisted into waves. “Wow Miss Jessie, you look amazing” got in first before Henry followed with his eager Yip. Giggling Jessie smiled softly at them both, “Ok I won't be out late, but even so, don’t get up to any mischief”

This caused both Henry and Tom to laugh, one sounding more like a series of yips. The door opened and closed and Jessie was gone. Together the two sat, watched movies and shared some popcorn that Tom had found in the pantry. Just as the end of a Witcher episode finished they heard yelling coming from outside. “I don’t give a dam Boyd, you had no right to hit that poor man, It was an accident.” The front door opened as Jessie stormed inside, the front of her dress had a brown stain down the side of her skirt.

Next Boyd came crashing into the room his face red as he reached out to grab Jessie's arm, this caused Henry to jump into action his snarl reaching the ears of the big man before he saw the wolf racing towards him. Jumping back almost stumbling over the kitchen chair Boyd’s face grew hotter, “Keep that mutt controlled Jessie otherwise I’ll control him for you with my shot Gun.”

The air went still as Henry felt Jessies and Tom's hands on him, “That is enough Boyd Hatfield, you are no longer welcome in this home. Get. Out!” Surprise filled Boyd’s face as he not only recognised Tom but registered his marching orders. Menace replaced the look of surprise, “Listen here little girl, you better watch that attitude of yours. I’ll allow you to cool off but we are not finished talking, and if you value the life of that mutt you will do as your told.” Punctuating the statement with a nod of his head he turned and strolled out the door.

Heart pounding he turned looking up at Jessie who seemed to have lost her speech, her face pale and her hands shaking. Tom moved swiftly pulling her into his arms as she began to cry, frustrated that it wasn’t his arms holding her, Henry pushed his body against her to show he was there, but inside he was furious. That man had threatened not just himself but Jessie, but he had to focus on her right now, she was more important no matter how much he wanted to go after him.

Chapter 9

[butchbarneygumble]

Got tagged by @lucky-lacmac ! I always grasp the chance to talk about my comfort characters so HERE GO They vary depending on hyperfixations so I'm going with what comes to mind rn and thus they're not numbered wheeeeeee Prohyas Warrior (Mighty Magiswords)

I just. I was just smitten by this guy from day one. I was in Florida, caught the first episode on TV. Wasn't too enticed by the show yet, but soon found myself dreaming of the characters. Gave it more of a chance when I was back home, and eventually got way too into it and it moved from Background Noise to Hell Yeah I Love You!!!! The show in general brings me so much joy but something about Accordion Man just... speaks to me. He insist he's manly and has a killer bod, but he's also openly fond of cute things like dolphins and lil bugs and is super motherly. I just love when characters defy gender expectations. And I love his design, his attitude, his voice, the sense of humour he brings, and that hair, man. That hair Sends Me. He's probably one of the reasons I dyed my hair blue.... not to mention both he and Vambre are just unapologetic manchildren who just try to have fun with their job and adult life. I really relate to that and wish CN would do more cartoons about that. I'm tired of children protags jhckgfgs

honestly every character in this show gets comfort character vibes from me (just please give vambre a break with the hornyposting she deserves so much more) and the fact it has like no fandom at all is criminal

Conker (Conker's Bad Fur Day)

Imagine if you will, I was 6 years old or so when Bad Fur Day released. I had no knowledge of it until my dad bought it for himself from the bargain bin in a local Intertoys that is now gone. Playing it through a bit (sneakily) my mom caught me JUST at the moment he threw up during the opening cutscene. I cried out of secondhand embarrassed, mom consoled me and it went into storage until I was 13 Then I found footage of the Great Mighty Poo on Youtube and snuck in that damn game again. Now, I had actual knowledge of English and as a teenager, the concept of an adult game was just very exciting. I fell in love with Conker, but in a different way a lot of people do. I see him as a normal guy who's just having a really weird day and his greed ruins his life. It's poetic, and I want to hug him a lot. But also slap him for being a little shit. He was there for me in my strange teenhood, when I was exploring adult subjects when I probably shouldn't, but it's been good all the way through. Probably my gateway into the furry fandom as well. As an adult I find myself enjoying the non-edgy stuff more - and it reflects in the fan material I produce of Conker. He is still very important to me and I love him a lot.

Barley Lightfoot (Onward)

Rarely was there ever a character I could point at and be like "me." Girls in animation were always just... There, or very girly to a point I couldn't see myself in there. Surprise, surprise, Renée, you're not even a girl!!! Barley is one of those characters that I saw myself in. I do not have a sibling, but sometimes do wish I had one - and live vigorously throughout media portrayals of them. He is me as my best self - supportive, loud, clumsy, outwardly scary but otherwise just trying to do the right thing. He's one of those "Do I want to date you or do I want your gender" types. Ian is a good boy too ofc, but Barley to me is especially personal. His choice of fashion and body shape, right down to his big jawline, I feel mirrors myself. However, where both Lightfoot bros shine is that I share the experience of having "half a dad".

When Barley and Ian were going through the underground river and he was talking about the last memory of his dad, I saw me. I cried buckets. My dad was diagnosed with ALS somewhere around when I first read about Onward's development, and when I saw it with him he was already paralyzed and wheelchair-bound. He was smiling all the way through. Fergy Fudgehog (Viva Piñata)

Lilshit. Absolute trash animal. Why do I love you so much? I dunno. He's kind of awful. Whereas originally characterized as a scaredy-cat who hated the idea of parties, he eventually got flanderized into a nasty little so-and-so who would sell his own adoptive brother if it meant he could get a snack out of it. When he's not that, he's a whiny manchild. Yet he entices me. His colour pattern, and my fondness for hedgehogs... him making weird noises a lot. I like him enough to have had a role play account for him for a while that's still around!! Sometimes you don't know why you like a character and that's okay.

Luigi (Super Mario Bros) Mario (Super Mario Bros)

When I was 12 I first got into Mario. And I don't mean playing the games and enjoying them, but actively into the characters, lore, and stories... for as much as you can say Mario has story. Mario and Luigi are just such pleasant looking characters. They shouldn't be cute but they are. They were my first crushes and recently I've gotten back into it and I'm just here for it. Mario and Luigi are cute and I should say it!!!!!I legit find them attractive, physically and mentally. Also shipping Luigi with Peasley gives me happiness and I hate teenage me for having bad taste and hating it.

Donkey Kong Diddy Kong Dixie Kong

Donkey Kong is the Absolute, the Eternal. He has always been there in my life, and so have his games. Something about that ape makes me feel comfortable and happy and I just want to hug him. I love the lore of the games, the aesthetics - toony-yet-realistic, and it influenced the HELL out of my own art style. Donkey Kong is just a Cool Soft Gorilla who WILL kick ass. Diddy and Dixie were also super influentual to me. DKC2 is one of my most favourite video games, starring two of my most favourite characters, and my favourite aesthetic... though, in a fun case of chicken-and-egg situation, I dunno if my love for pirates came from DKC2 or other way around. Lars Barriga (Steven Universe)

Babby's First Gender Envy When Lars' entire arc happened, I was in college, constantly trying to discover myself. I enjoyed the character before the arc but the arc just elevated my love for him to the stars. He's just a fella, so nervous about what other people think about him... later in the show you get an insight on why he's like that. Then, he's dragged to space, forced to confront his emotional constipation, Fuckin Dies trying to save his new friends, and is brought back to life as a badass pink space zombie. Something about that just vibed with me super strongly. And how Steven always saw the good in him even if he bullied him. I love him so much. I love them both. That's the main ones! I tag whomever wants to do this I'm bad at tagging jdkfghjd

[charmandhex]

A TOTALLY UNOFFICIAL AND VERY MUCH NOT SANCTIONED BY NBC OPENING SCENE FOR AN AS OF YET NONEXISTENT PILOT OF THE ADVENTURE ZONE: BALANCE ANIMATED SHOW THAT I AM 100% NOT GETTING PAID FOR

Credit to: the McElboys

No credit to: me, Charm H. Adventurezone, sleep deprived [job title redacted] and overly ambitious fic writer

[Our opening shot is of the world of Abeir-Toril (or whatever the fuck we’re going to call it to avoid copyright issues idk that redacted job title up there sure isn’t lawyer) as it drifts through the Prime Material Plane. From here, we can see little but clouds, water, and land masses. One regular-sized moon orbiting the world drifts into view. If you look closely, but you’re only looking closely because you’re a nerd who knows what to look for, you can see a much, much smaller moon -THAT’S NO MOON got there first Clint what now- drifts over a massive, still lake and a brightly colored spot that we might know to be Neverwinter, wait- Eversummer, hm, that was graphic novel, but can we use that there?- KINDASPRING there we go. The initial shot is quiet, for a moment, before seven notes -yes those ones folks- ring out.]

GRIFFIN [audio only]: I can guess what you’re probably all expecting. Some big, dramatic speech to match the big, dramatic intro we’ve got going on here. [As Griffin talks, we start to zoom in on a continent conveniently labeled NOT-FAERUN. We fly by our much smaller moon, but not close enough to see anything of interest – yet. We see Kindaspring, all busy and fantasy and so on. We catch a glimpse of a city buried in the shadow of a mountain range, with a bunch of dudes who all look the same. A city on a cliff, a shining gold monument in the center and trails of dust on a track around the city. Canyons, and a dash of pearlescent color just for a moment. Blink and you miss it, and a flash of a black and white tent in the woods near Kindaspring. You get the picture.] But, fact of the matter is, folks, we kinda blew all the budget on this one shot! Completely boned it in the first two seconds! So, let’s get right into it and roll some fuckin’ initiative- oh, can I say fuck? Are we allowed to do that, here on NBC Peacock? Shit, I’m going to completely bone our cussing budget too- anyway! Let’s roll some initiative and meet our heroes.

[Zoom in on wagon on road outside Kindaspring. It’s not a very impressive wagon. There are patches on the canvas. The wheels are all creaky and bouncy over the dirt road. The horses look like they could use a nap. There are stink lines, y’all. The road, meanwhile, is pretty well-used. There are ruts, and the sides of the road run clean and even. It’s surrounded by woods, and we’re far enough out of Kindaspring to not get any noise from the city, nor close enough to our destination to even get a hint of whatever the fuck I’m going to have to call Phandalin that isn’t Phandalin.

But back to our characters. Right now, only one is visible, a buff human man, like super buff, no you don’t understand animators, he must be a brick shithouse of a man, he’s very sensitive about this. He has massive muscles and massive sideburns, and he looks way too happy to be driving this wagon. You just know the vehicle proficiency jokes are coming. Cartoon GRIFFIN pops up in the corner of the screen, looking unimpressed.]

GRIFFIN: …Well, maybe not heroes. Three… boys. Three very messy, very murder hobo, very horny boys. [A beat.] Tres horny boys, if you will. So, uh, first up is-

MAGNUS [aware of Griffin and waving at everyone- listen, fourth wall breaks are kinda a thing for me, folks]: I’m Magnus Burnsides, human fighter! [Stat card for Magnus pops up on the side. There’s a not very flattering picture with it.] Also… [with the wagon reigns in hand, he starts counting off on his fingers, concentrating] Uh, master carpenter, man of action, rush into battle- oh, and I’m from Raven’s Roost, and-

[The canvas flaps blow open behind MAGNUS, and MAGNUS’S stat card disappears with a pop and a tiny bit of white smoke. TAAKO steps out, already exasperated and swinging a hand, colliding with MAGNUS’S head and pushing it to the side.]

TAAKO: Yeah, save the backstory for like… 40 more episodes, my dude. We don’t have time for that shit right now.

GRIFFIN: O-kay, guess we’re just gonna assume we can swear whenever we want.

[As GRIFFIN is talking, TAAKO stops pushing on MAGNUS’S head.]

TAAKO [triumphant, shouting]: FUCK!

[Flock of birds flies out of the trees.]

GRIFFIN: So this is Taako, the elf wizard [TAAKO’S stat card pops up. Much more flattering picture.] and-

TAAKO: That’s Taako, you know, from… podcast, elf wizard and baller chef, yes, thank you, very much. AND very, very beautiful. [TAAKO does a hair flip. There are sparkles and magical sounds.] And very, very bored. [TAAKO’S stat card disappears.] How far away is this fuckin’ town? What’s it called again?

MAGNUS [shrugging]: Beats me. [To GRIFFIN] Did we come up with a name that doesn’t violate copyright?

GRIFFIN [evading the question, because I still am]: Aaaaaaaaaaaaand last but not least, Merle Highchurch. [A beat. GRIFFIN sighs.] Merle, that’s your cue.

MERLE [inside the tent]: Wha? Somebody say my name? [Canvas flaps rustle rustle rustle. MERLE’S face pops out, looking around owlishly. He also steps out to the front of the wagon.]

MAGNUS [now very crowded and still trying to drive]: You missed your cue, old man.

MERLE [indignant]: I was busy studying my cantrips!

TAAKO and MAGNUS [in unison]: Gross!

MERLE: No, not like-

GRIFFIN [interrupting]: And Merle is a cleric! [MERLE’S stat card pops up. The picture was taken too high, so we can only see MERLE’S hair and forehead.]

MERLE: I’m a what now?

GRIFFIN [overly enthusiastic, it’s a bit now, folks]: Now, for those of you who aren’t familiar, clerics are kind of a support class magic user. They can cast things like buffs-

MERLE: Huh?

GRIFFIN [still overly enthusiastic]: and heal their party members-

MERLE: I can do that?

GRIFFIN: Clerics also serve gods, and Merle’s god is Mort-

MERLE [indignant again]: Hang on! That doesn’t sound right!

GRIFFIN [pushing out of his little bubble and leaning into the scene]: Then who is your god?

MERLE: Uh… Pan! [MERLE pulls out the Extreme Teen Bible.] See? Pan!

MAGNUS [whispering to TAAKO]: Okay, I guess this is how we’re resolving that whole thing. [TAAKO shrugs. MERLE is smiling. It’s adorable, like those little smiles Carey Pietsch does I love them so much, y’all.]

GRIFFIN: So, Magnus, Taako, Merle. Off on an adventure of epic proportions. [GRIFFIN is getting excited.] Full of action and danger and goofs and found family and-

MAGNUS: Now hold on! Epic proportions? Epic? [MAGNUS waves a hand around at the generally pretty chill woods, the boring road, and the stink lines wagon.]

TAAKO: Yeah, so far this is snoozeville, population, uh, me and these two chucklefucks.

MERLE [peering at GRIFFIN]: you sure you got the right dnd party, bud?

GRIFFIN [looking at audience]: We’re still negotiating contracts, so I’m filling in for, uh… someone. So for now, hey, I’m Griffin McElroy, your Dungeon Master, your best friend, and your announcer for this pilot episode. Ahem. [GRIFFIN clears his throat.] Grab your shields and ready your spell slots. Strap in your asses and… really, just strap in your asses. And, for the very first time, welcome to the animated version of… THE ADVENTURE ZONE!

[Title card and Mort Garson’s “Déjà Vu” plays. All my ideas went into dialogue, folks. Fan artists, this one’s all yours.]

[We pop back into the same scene as before.]

MAGNUS: Yeah, so, uh, like we were saying, before, uh, whatever that was, what we’re doing now is-

TAAKO [interrupting]: Hold on! We are not, I repeat, not doing some dumb recap where we explain this boring job... unless…

MAGNUS, MERLE, and GRIFFIN [all have gone laser eye meme]: UNLESS?

TAAKO [singing]: Flashback sequence!

[There’s a loud POP! as the scene shifts, and we’re now in your standard fantasy tavern. There’s a table with four chairs right in front of us, all of which are empty. The tavern acts as a backdrop behind that, illustrating just how fantasy this world is. We see humans and elves and dwarves yes, because we’ve already seen them, but also Gnomes and tieflings and haflings and orcs and Genasi and aarakocra (try spelling that one, folks ;) I’m sure that won’t come up later) and so on and so forth.

There’s another POP! as GRIFFIN’S window reappears in the upper right corner. He looks slightly ruffled.]

GRIFFIN [straightening his hair and glasses]: Wow, that is going to take some getting used to. Anyway, the boys should be here in a second, and-

[Three more pops as MAGNUS, TAAKO, and MERLE appear in three of the four seats at the table. MERLE lands upside down. He immediately starts struggling to right himself]

MAGNUS [looking at the empty chair and frowning]: Wait, what was the name of the guy we were meeting again? Gumdrop?

TAAKO: Hm… Gurgle? Guava? Gumbo?

MERLE [having finally righted himself]: No! My cousin, uh… um… oh, that’s right, Gundren!

[As MERLE says GUNDREN, another pop as GUNDREN pops into existence in the chair. He looks like if you put MERLE through a grinder, not like we’re gonna run into one of those in an episode or two, right, fellas?

Nasty boy that he is, GUNDREN lets out a grunt and then spits on the floor. People have to clean that, GUNDREN! This is why you- (SPOILERS REDACTED)- anyway.]

GUNDREN: So, like I was saying, boys. You take my wagon from here in Kindaspring down the road to Mandolin-

TAAKO: Oh, that’s what we’re calling it?

MERLE: I thought that was another TV show?

[Up in the corner, GRIFFIN shrugs.]

GUNDREN: Uh… yes? That’s… what it’s called? [GUNDREN looks suspiciously at them. It seems like he’d give the job to someone else in an instant, if literally anyone else would take the job. But magically, he’s stuck with these boys.] But, uh, you get my wagon and my goods to Mandolin, and I’ll let you in on the next job. And that job, boys… [GUNDREN laughs. It sounds like if you threw rocks in a blender.] That’s the kinda job that will be the last job you ever need to take.

MAGNUS [cheerfully]: Well, that sounds murdery!

[There’s a loud POP! and we’re back on the wagon again, all of our boys already in place.]

GRIFFIN [shrugging, smiling]: Guess you’re going to find out! Oh, and boys… let’s roll initiative.

[ikenbar]

A Date with Kiro: The Costume Shop

Howdy folks!

So, I’ve had the idea for dates supporting my oc, Ikamara for some time now but I wanted to go a little farther in her story before trying anything. But now we are at Chapter five so HERE WE GO!! 

I also want to use the dates to show off who would be the main fella for the next chapters!! and  SURPRISE!! Kiro will be the main for the next chapter!! :D So excited for this chapter you guys have no idea. And I’ll be able to show it off next week!! Stay tuned~ ;P

-Ike and Bar Productions

Setting: Right after the happenings of Chapter four. Ike has a weekend off so she spends it investigating some leads on the Montu case.

To understand some details about the Montu case, feel free to read Chapter one, part one of my fanfiction here! If you’re just here for the sake of a Kiro date, enjoy your stay! You don’t have to read the fanfiction to understand what is happening but it would make more sense! :D

Warnings: There are none. Unless you have a problem with tight clothing and/or cute gay moments.

Date with Kiro: Costume Shop

"Sorry, mam. Like I said before, we don’t sell that here.”

I pouted, dropping the mask in my hand slightly. I had made a goal to visit all of the costume shops in Loveland city, searching for the mask Montu had sent me, hoping to find one that had sold it. But the city only had three costume shops, and I had been through all them before ten on a Saturday.

Sensing my disappointment, the shop owner continued, “If it would make you feel better, you can have a look around. I don’t know. Maybe they took something apart from my store to make it.” I thought a moment, then nodded, shoving the mask into my messenger bag. I turned and looked around the shop. It was small but jam packed full of strange outfits and costumes. Some of which seemed to be vintage. This intrigued me.

I had barely taken one step into the store before a buzzing came from my pocket. I pulled it out and froze. 

It was Kiro.

I still hadn’t quite accepted the fact that the Kiro was now one of my frequent connections. But there he was, calling me on a Saturday like we were actual friends… at least I hoped we were. Maybe I was just a question he was trying to answer. After all, how we met left a lot to the imagination.

Without wanting to waste anymore time, I quickly answered the call.

“Speaking.” I said, as casual as I could.

“Hey Super Stranger! How are you?”

Instantly my sour mood disappeared as Kiro’s happy voice filled my ears. Kiro had given me that nickname when I had saved him from a car accident. I had my motorcycle helmet on so he couldn’t see my face very well. He had called me his hero and had given me a nickname to commemorate it. And, though the nickname was corny, it never ceased to bring butterflies to my stomach. “I’m alright.” I mused, walking further into the store as I spoke, “How are you?”

“I’m great!” Kiro sang, “Guess what?”

“... What?” I asked, my smile faltering slightly.

“I found this amazing little stand that serves the best drinks! You’ve gotta come try it!”

“What- Now?” I scoffed.

“Yeah!” Kiro sang, “I don’t know when they are closing so it has to be now!”

“I’m a little busy with work.” I said, pulling at various costumes from their racks, “I don’t think I’d be able to leave it so easily.”

“You work on the weekends?” Kiro laughed slightly.

“Well superheroing isn’t really a part time gig!”

“But even superheroes need breaks!”

“Yeah, well, crime never rests.”

“But they make an amazing hot chocolate! They add espresso for extra flavor!”

The mention of coffee instantly changed my attitude.

“What do you say? Just one drink!” Kiro’s pleas increasingly became higher pitched, as if he was a child promising to do chores for a piece of candy. 

Before I could say another word, a scream came from Kiro’s end of the phone. “Oh no.” Kiro whispered with dread on his tongue, “I’ve been spotted! I’ll text you the address and you can just meet me here!”

“Are you sure that’s a good-”

“No time to talk!” Kiro hurriedly said, “Gotta go! Later Stranger!” And with that, he hung up the phone. I looked down at the phone, shaking my head uselessly at it. Despite the disapproval I felt, a smile still crept it’s way up my lips. There was no way of saying no to that man.

 With new found motivation, I searched the variety of costumes for anything pertaining to Montu. Without realizing it, I had begun looking through the superhero suits. As I scanned the clothes, I pulled out a particularly familiar looking costume. My foster brother, Sam, and I used to watch old cartoons from CDs that our foster father kept in his attic. There were a thousand collections to pick from but one cartoon in particular truly piqued our interest. 

Boot Fever. 

It was about a group of superheroes that fought villains who tried taking over their already crumbling city. It was a very old show with a very old premise but, man did Sam and I eat it up. From the characters to the animation to even the terrible voice acting, we watched that show late into the night. I may not have had great memories of my childhood, but those memories are ones I would take to my grave. 

I thought the show had long been forgotten but there I was, holding the main protagonist’s outfit. Her name was Red Sparrow. Her super power was to be able to transform her body into anything she thought of.  Sam compared her to me all the time. Though the only point he could connect us to was the fact she was strong. Because, other than that, we were complete opposites. She was very dramatic and in tune with her emotions. Not to mention her suit was extremely form fitting. And, at the time, the tightest thing in my closet was my yoga pants. Even then they would be paired with an oversized sweatshirt and a flannel around my waist.

Past all of that, I loved the fact that she wore a full face mask. It resembled the face of the bird she was named after and, though the design was simple, made her character a big hit in her time. Women's appearances in shows in that time were based solely on how revealing they were. Red sparrow seemed to take that and turn it on it’s head. Her jumpsuit completely covered her whole body, hiding her identity completely.

I plucked off the mask from the top hanger and turned it over in my hands. No one would know it was her unless they took it off. She was a mystery. I longed to be that mystery ever since I was a kid-

A loud bang came from the front door. I ducked behind the clothes rack, immediately bracing for a fight. Instead, I was met with the sound of someone panting heavily. “Welcome in, sir.” The owner of the shop said sarcastically, “Is there something I can help you find?” Curiosity overlapping my shock, I peered around the rack. 

There, weakly leaning on the door, was Kiro. He had his eyes closed as he gasped for air. He was in his usual disguise of sunglasses and a black hoodie, but the hoodie’s armpits looked to be drenched in sweat as his sunglasses slid down his equally wet face.

I quickly sunk back behind the rack, frozen in fear. Kiro can’t be here! I screamed in my head, If he tried talking to me he’d know I was Super Stranger! Then I would only disappoint him by being some lowly tv show producer with no regard for feelings! Not to mention, holding a scantily clad costume of an old tv show. I have to act fast.

Looking down at the mask in my hand, a stupid plan came to mind. Not having the time to second guess it, I quickly threw the mask on and pulled the rest of the costume off of it’s hanger. I hurried to the dressing room and pulled the curtain shut, praying that Kiro didn’t notice me go in there. I quickly started stripping down, folding my clothes and shoving them into my messenger bag as I moved. 

As I changed, I heard some screaming coming from outside of the small shop.

“I saw him go this way!”

“Quick! Don’t let him go too far!”

Some rustling came from inside the store as Kiro’s familiar voice traveled the air, “Sir, I need a place to hide! Please! Help me!”

I had never heard Kiro so desperate. Half of me wanted to jump out of the dressing room right then to help him. The other half would rather finish getting dressed first. 

The latter won.

 I pulled on the skin tight suit, regretting it instantly as it squeaked over my skin and tugged at my unshaven leg hairs. 

“I don’t know, sir.” the shopkeeper droned, “That sounds rather suspicious to me.”

“I’ll give you my autograph.”

“There is a dressing room over there you can hide in.” The shopkeeper spoke quickly and excitedly. I cursed in a whisper as I picked up my pace. After a moment of pause, quick steps approached my hiding spot. With one last zip of my costume, thankfully from the front, the curtain to the room shot open. Kiro hadn’t looked at me yet, still focused on the door where the screaming had only further increased. But, once he had, his face went completely red. 

“I-I’m so sorry!” Kiro stammered, eyes darting straight to the ceiling, “I didn’t know this room was occupied!” A loud bang came from the store’s door again. Without lingering on the awkwardness anymore, I grabbed Kiro’s arm and pulled him into the room. I pushed him into the corner and held a finger to the mask’s beak. Still bushing wildly, Kiro nodded, holding his eyes on my mask all too securely. 

High pitched voices rang through the store as they searched the shop. Some of them were questioning the shopkeeper. Others were whining about how small the store was. The sound of metal scraping against metal chimed in the mess of sounds as the girls started searching the clothing racks for him. Soon the interrogating and complaints turned even more sour as they slowly came up with nothing.

Just as I thought we were in the clear, a shadow appeared under the dressing room curtain. “Hey!” A particularly annoying voice called, “Is there anyone in there?!” I froze. Kiro couldn’t answer. He was the person they were looking for! But I couldn’t answer either because Kiro would know I was Super Stranger!

“Hello?!” The girl impatiently called. I felt Kiro’s eyes on me. 

I sighed.

“Occupied.” I resolutely boomed. The shadow flickered.

“S-sorry!” She said, obviously startled by my voice. The shadow quickly disappeared. Avoiding Kiro’s eyes, I walked over to the curtain and peered out of the room, just in time to watch all the girls leave the store. I sighed once again and straightened myself, letting the curtain fall back into place.

“You should be safe now.” I said, turning back to face Kiro. He was staring at me wide eyed and mouth agape. His face had significantly returned to it’s normal hue, if not for a slight blush on his cheeks.

“S-Super Stranger?!” He scoffed, finally letting his eyes stray from my face and to my body. I folded my arms and popped my hip.

“Eyes up here, chief.” I deadpanned, signalling for him to adjust his gaze. He did so, his blush rushing back through his face.

“Sorry!” He chuckled nervously, pulling his eyes from me completely, “I just never thought you’d have such a…”

“Yes?” 

“... Such a love for such an old show! I mean, how old do you have to be to know who Red Sparrow is?!”

“Apparently not old at all.” I walked over to Kiro and tilted my head so our eyes met, “Suggesting that the twenty-three year old Kiro knows about it.” Kiro tensed. Then he laughed, releasing some of the obvious tension that rode on his shoulders. He looked at me adoringly through the mask.

“I can’t believe it, Super Stranger! You saved me again!” Kiro raised his arms. I held a hand out.

“They were just some fangirls.” I insisted, pushing Kiro backward, “No big deal.”

“Of course it’s a big deal! Who knows what they would have done if they caught me! Let me make it up to you.”

“That isn’t necessary.”

“Come on it’s the least I can do! Hey! That drink stand I was telling you about isn’t too far from here! Let’s go there!”

“And how do you expect to get out of here with those girls looking for you?” I asked, folding my arms again. Kiro’s eyes flickered back to my body. Then, a strange emotion sparked in his eyes as he let them linger there.

“I just need a new disguise!” He said rubbing his hands together. I slowly looked down at my outfit.

“... If you think you’re getting this-”

“No, this shop is full of costumes! I wonder…” Kiro walked past me, being careful not to touch me. He paused at the curtain, checking that the coast was clear, then he moved out of the room. I had only been alone for a couple of minutes until Kiro had returned, costume in hand. I froze.

In his hands was the costume of Complex Cell, the sidekick to Red Sparrow. He could duplicate himself up to a thousand times and not break a sweat, easily confusing the enemy long enough to take them down. He also just so happened to be Red Sparrow’s love interest. 

“What are you doing?” I asked, even though I already knew the answer.

“What do you mean, Sparrow?!” Kiro beamed.

>>>

“I can pay, Kiro.”

“Who is this Kiro?!” Kiro boomed, handing the shop owner his card, “For I am COMPLEX CELL!!” I rolled my eyes. The moment Kiro had put on the costume it was like he had completely disappeared, only to be replaced by Complex Cell. The overly confident, motivating, annoyingly positive sidekick of a superhero… so in reality not much had changed other than how he spoke, which was cute at first but it got boring quick.

“Come, dear Sparrow!” Kiro laced his arm into mine, “Hot chocolate awAITS US!!” He took his card and skipped out of the store, pulling me closely behind him. 

The moment I stepped out of the store, I immediately felt the eyes of the world on me. I may have been comfortable with my body but I had never been that exposed before. I normally would be wearing at least a jacket but now… 

“Hey.” Kiro tugged on my arm, “You ok, Sparrow?”

“I’m not Red Sparrow.” I said through my teeth, “Do you realize how much we stand out?! Everyone’s staring!”

“The sidewalk is practically empty.”

“Emphasis on practically.”

“Stranger,” Kiro laughed and tapped my arm lightly, “You’ve got nothing to worry about. Remember, you’re not the only one dressed up like this! I’ve got your back! Besides, you look amazing!”

My heart leaped through my throat, “... You really think so?”

“Of course!” Kiro looked down at me. His mask only covered the top half of his face, exposing his glistening smile, “I’m disappointed more people aren’t looking! More people need to see how amazing you look!” I elbowed Kiro in the side but still felt the uneasiness lift from my shoulders. There was nothing Kiro would say that could make me hate him.

“Red Sparrow!?”

Kiro halted in his steps and spun around. A small child smiled brightly at Kiro and me. She was tugging at her father’s jacket, pointing at us excitedly. “Dad! Dad, look!! It’s Red Sparrow and Complex Cell!” Kiro released my arm and struted confidently towards the kid.

“Hello, dear child!” Kiro boomed, , smiling brightly and laughing dramatically as he knelt to the little girl’s eye level, “I see you have spotted Sparrow and I! But I am very surprised that someone as pretty as you could know about us!”

“I watched you guys win battles with my mom!” The girl giggled, blushing at Kiro’s shining face, “I really like how you guys save the day! Everyday! I especially like Red Sparrow.” The girl looked hopefully up to me, “She’s my favorite!” 

“Well today is your lucky day!” Kiro turned to look at me as well, smile somehow brighter than before, “Isn’t it, Sparrow??” I looked between the two of them, frozen in place. I know what Kiro wants. He wants Red Sparrow. But I'm not Red Sparrow! I’m Ike. The horrible, cold, distant-

A sparkle flashed across the little girl’s eyes. A sparkle I was all too familiar with…

I sighed.

“My dear adventurer!!” My voice jumped to action as I threw my hands in the air and cat-walked over to the girl, “I am honored to be considered your favorite superhero! Pray tell, just how are you doing this fine day?” I knelt down next to Kiro and posed for the girl. Her face lit up beautifully, smiling brighter than even Kiro. Before I could say anymore, she ran into my arms, wrapping her arms around my neck tightly and nearly tipping me over. I kept my arms out, looking to Kiro for any kind of help he could give me. He merely grinned, flashing me with adoring eyes. I frowned uselessly at him. He was no help. 

I patted the little girl softly on her back, “M-My! You startled me.” I awkwardly said in Sparrow’s voice, “What’s this for?”

“Last year, my mommy died.” The little girl’s whisper stunned me even further, “She was sick and spent a lot of time in her bed. But we would still spend time together to watch you save the day! She said that she liked you because it didn’t matter what happened to you. You would always make sure the bad guys would lose. And that’s why you’re my favorite! Because you were my mom’s favorite!”

Anything I wanted to say was blocked by a lump forming in my throat. Tidal waves of emotions crashed through my heart as the girl’s grip remained tight around my neck. I may not have had that kind of experience before, nor did I want to experience it, but hearing it come from such a small voice made me feel so bad for her. Like I was next to her on that bed and watching those shows with her mom. The only person I watched those kinds of shows with was Sam and if I were to lose him…

I wrapped my arms around the little girl, pulling her closely to me as I cradled her. “You and your mother have quite an amazing taste.” I said, heroic voice faltering slightly, “But, you should know one thing. I am only a hero because you allow me to be one.” The little girl pulled away from me.

“What do you mean?” She asked, her big eyes filled with curiosity. I smiled lightly and moved my hands so I was holding her arms.

“I am only a hero to protect people like you! Without you, I would be nothing.” I tilted my head and winked at the girl through my mask. The girl shook her head and pushed my hands down. 

“That’s not true.” She smiled, “You don’t need someone watching you to do the right thing! You should be able to do it because you know it’s right! That’s what my mom always said!” My finger twitched. Without a moment to waste, the girl turned to her father.

“Daddy! Daddy! Can you take a picture of us!!”

>>

The girl and her father walked joyfully away, leaving Kiro and me in silence. A hand rubbed my back. “You alright, Stranger?” Kiro asked, finally dropping his hero facade. 

“... How can a girl that young be so smart?” I asked softly, folding my arms and adjusting my posture to one that better suited me instead of Red Sparrow. Kiro laughed.

“You know, I was thinking the same thing!” He said through a chuckle, “I guess it’s true that wisdom comes from experience.” Kiro’s words left us in another meaningful silence.

“... She reminds me of my foster brother.” I said, my voice trailing slightly. Kiro’s head snapped to me in my peripherals. 

“You… were a foster kid?” Kiro asked, tone shifting dramatically.

“We used to watch Boot Fever all the time when we were growing up.” I continued, ignoring Kiro’s question, “He would dress up and pop popcorn because he was so excited to watch it with me.”  I turned and caught Kiro’s sparkling eyes. I rolled my own and shoved him from me. 

“Don’t look at me like that.” I deadpanned. 

“Stranger!” He said, closing the distance between us again with open arms, “You’re opening up!” 

“Yeah, yeah.” I mused, looking round the area we were standing in, “Where is this drink stand you have been raving about?”

“Oh!” Kiro quickly grabbed my hand and pointed behind me. A cute, wooden, mobile drink stand  sat on the other side of the street. Steam wafted up from a false chimney, gracing the cool air with the soft smell of caramel and cinnamon. Two people stood in line for the drinks, but other than that the street was nearly empty. “Luckily for us, those girls didn’t see me at the stand.” Kiro excitedly said into my ear, “And there is no line! Let’s go!” Kiro pushed against my back. I quickly swatted him away and started walking to the stand on my own. Kiro quickly followed, clapping his hands together like an eager child.

The couple at the stand left with their drinks, leaving room for Kiro and me to walk up. The woman manning the stand looked me up and down. A charming smile flashed on her lips. “Red Sparrow?” She asked, leaning on the counter and arching an eyebrow.

“Barista?” I asked, folding my arms again. She laughed and stood up straight.

“No need to get defensive, Red.” The barista said, “You look good!” A sharp blush struck my cheeks. Arms wrapped around my waist and pulled me backwards and into a chest.

“I know, right?!” Kiro giddily chimed, rubbing his head into my shoulder. I rolled my eyes and flicked Kiro’s forehead. He whined and pulled away from me to rub his head. The barista chuckled and turned to her drinks.

“So, what will it be, heroes?” She asked, avoiding any more eye contact with me. I looked at the menus on the side of the stand, then at Kiro.

“... I’ll have an iced caramel macchiato, subed with white chocolate mocha, coconut milk, and a mocha drizzle.”

Kiro and the barista looked at me in shocked silence. I turned calmly to Kiro. “Anything you’d like to add, Cap?” I asked Kiro casually. His look of astonishment never faltered.

“...You really drink that kind of drink?” He asked with a laugh.

“Oh not at all.” I tactlessly chimed, casually looking at the tip of my gloves, “I just told you I was a foster child. I’ve got to throw you off my scent before you figure out my secret identity.”

“Oh a drink order won’t throw me off!” Kiro laughed and casually approached me, “Just you wait! I’ll figure your identity out and we can be heroes together!... Speaking of which,” Kiro leaned forward, eyes shining beautifully, “Did you ever come up with a superhero name for me like you promised?”

I didn’t know if it was how close he was standing to me, the soft aroma of romantic scents, or the fact that he fit into that superhero costume so well, but every word I wanted to say got caught in my throat. All I could do was look him in the eyes. Eyes so gorgeously blue, I could swim in them…

“Hey, Red.”

I snapped to and looked over at the barista. She shook the iced drink in her hand. “You gonna pay for this or make me stand here holding it in the middle of fall?” She asked, tone dripping in annoyance. I cleared my throat and nodded, taking the drink from her. 

“As for you, Captain.” I said, regaining my composure as I turned back to Kiro, “Your hero name is one of importance. I will tell you what it is in due time.”

“So in other words, you don’t have one yet.” Kiro sighed, pouting slightly.

“I do too!” I huffed, stepping away from the stand and gesturing to Kiro to follow, “I’m just not going to expose it in a place where everyone is listening!” Kiro laughed and pulled me into a firm side hug.

“Alright Stranger, I’ll let you off this once.” He sighed, pulling me down the street with me by his side, “So what are you up to for the rest of the day! Are you free to hang out?”

“Me?” I scoffed, brushing off Kiro’s hand from my shoulder, “What about you? Does Savin even know you’re out here?”

“Today’s my day off! Which means I’m all yours!... if you’ll have me?” Kiro’s eyes sparkled like diamonds as he awaited my answer. My hand drifted to my messenger bag where a lump graced my fingertips. I dedicated the whole day to finding anything I could about Montu… but I suppose the costume shops were a bust, and I had no other leads to follow… 

“... Where to first?” I asked, adjusting the messenger bag on my shoulder. Kiro beamed and laced his arm in mine. With that, we had continued our walk down the street, starting a meaningless conversation and going nowhere in particular. And, for the first time in a while, 

I was alright with having no where to go.

(Next)

[niqhtlord01]

Hello, welcome, and salutations everyone!  We thought this time round we’d give our fighters a break from their never ending struggle for bloodshed, fame, and cookies, for a short look behind the curtain and see how the fighters interact with each other. -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

(Doors opens to backroom with several characters chatting and lounging.) Grif: So was this your first show?  Nemesis: No, I sssstared in a popular tv show before written by J.J.Abrams.  Simmons: Wait; are you talking about LOST?  Nemesis: *nods*  Grif: You were the smoke monster?!?!?!? Nemesis: Eassssssiest money ever made.  Nemesis: Ju-ju-just floated around being spooky.  Simmons: I have so many questions!!!!!!!

(Pans over to Caboose and Freckles talking with Cammie and Nugget) Cammie: You ever think of taking him out of the gun into something else?  Caboose: Oh Freckles here used to be a eight foot tall fighting robot.  Cammie: Then how’d the fella end up in a gun?  Caboose: Oh it’s a long story that has me, my friends, mr stabby stab, mr grumpy bug, and santa.  *Nugget hops on Freckles and falls asleep* Cammie: I’ve got time to spare, lay it on me.

(Over at the bar, Felix and Roman are sharing drinks) Felix: No way. Roman: *dabs cigar in tray and takes a sip) Roman: I kid you not friend.  Felix: They wrote you off by getting eaten by a bird?!  Felix: *smacks table and laughs* Roman: *puts out cigar entirely* Roman: It was a BIG bird.  Roman: Besides, didn’t you get written out by falling off a building? Felix: After being blasted off by a grenade.  Felix: But seriously, you were one of the best villains they had. Roman: *Tips hat* Too true; but i think I wouldn’t have fit in with kids now fighting a literal devil lady.  Felix: *Raises glass*  Felix: Too wayward souls. Roman: *Raises glass* Roman: Taken before our time.  *Glasses tink together.* 

(Tucker and Professor Rufus appear to be in a heated debate of some sort) Rufus: So you’re telling me you’ve experienced time displacement? Tucker: Dude, we just call it time travel. Rufus: Not the most technical term I assure you.  Tucker: *groans* Tucker: We already know you’re smart, your probably the smartest one here. Tucker: No need to keep piling it on. Tucker: Besides, chicks aren’t interested in guys who speak the lengthy of a dictionary.  Rufus: Point of fact I would gladly take against you.  Tucker: Oh yeah?  Rufus: Have you heard my voice?  Rufus: I could be reciting a twitter feed and I would have women swooning over me.  Tucker: Damnit he’s right; i can’t even stay mad at him. 

(Don Paragon is sitting in a chair opposite Dr. Watts.) Don: What exactly are you a doctor of.  Watts: At first it was just robotics but after a while I just got bored and kept getting more and more doctorates.  Don: What are you working on now?  Watts: Animal Husbandry. Don: ...... Don: Surely you jest.  Watts: I was very, very bored.

(Tex and Toth watching Wyoming and Nomad from another table.)  Tex: I’m surprised your friend has been able to keep listening to Wyoming’s stories.  Tex: During Freelancer we couldn’t get him to shut up when he started.  Toth: It probably helps that he can’t talk and is too polite to leave.  (both turn to observe Wyoming making grand gestures while Nomad nods but tries to grab hold of Skout as she walks by for a save)

(Yang and Weiss walk over to Jaune sitting by himself)  Yang: We need to talk. Jaune: What about? Weiss: You are too shy and too nice to be single.  Jaune: I- Weiss: No, I’m not saying I want to date you.  Yang: We just came over to give you some advice on how to grab yourself a girl. Weiss: But also to make you look less depressing by not having you sit alone Valentina: Who says he’s sitting alone?  *Valentina decloaks in the open seat opposite Jaune as Yang and Weiss jump back in surprise.*  Valentina: *Grins*  Valentina: Sorry ladies, but he’s mine now.  Yang: Why were you cloaked?? Valentina: I had an urge to run a quick errand. (Before Yang could ask what errand the door to room is kicked in)  Church: Everyone come quick!  Church: Someone filled O’Malley’s helmet with whipped cream and now he can’t figure how to get it off! 

 (Ruby sitting at a bar stool with her legs swinging while talking to Sarge and Yasamin) Ruby: I do not kill people!  Yasamin: But you cut them to pieces with a giant knife. Ruby: *Gasps* Ruby: Crescent Rose is a scythe thank you very much!  Yasamin: Which you use to slice your enemies to pieces with.  Sarge: Calm down missy.  Sarge: Clearly this little girl can’t tell what a adorable killing machine she is because of her attire.  Yasamin: How does that factor in at all?  Sarge: Last time I checked, and with Grif’s help I check daily, human blood was red.  Yasamin: I still don’t- Yasamin: *observed Ruby’s outfit*  Yasamin: Oh, I see now.  (Locus and Ren sharing a bowl of tea together) Ren: It is nice to meet someone who is equally calm headed. Locus: It does get tiring being the voice of reason for so long. Ren: How do you balance it out?  Locus: Most problems can be solved with a well placed bullet.  Ren: *disturbed* Ren: And the ones that can’t be solve with a bullet?  *Nora smashes table with giant hammer* Nora: Can be solved with a giant hammer!!!! (Donut and Kazu looking at TV screen of ocean) Donut: You ever wonder why we’re here? Kazu: Contractual obligation mostly.  Donut: Yeah, me t- Donut: Wait what?! Kazu: I signed an english contract even though I can’t read it.  Donut: Why?!!? Kazu: It was either that or go back to power rangers. Kazu: And in Japan, power rangers gets pretty out of hand.  Donut: How so? Kazu: Last gig I had to play the green ranger fighting a living sushi cart that spat out living lobsters and eels. 

[cardest]

Washington DC and the Baltimore playlist

DC Sound Attack! Well, if Biden is waiting in the wings to move in to the White House and well, gets a bit bored or just has some spare time, he can totally tune in to my Washington DC playlist! And Baltimore! Maybe he and the new VP can grab a crab cake from Lexington Market! Anyway, what a town DC is, the bands, the songs, the TV shows and who can forget the Exorcist? So I just had to put a list of songs together from DC, from Virginia, Baltimore and surrounds. You may have see my Philadelphia playlist added a few days ago below. I wonder what Ian Mackaye would think of this list

WASHINGTON D.C 001 Clutch - D.C. Sound Attack! 002 Foo Fighters - The Feast and the Famine 003 Rollins Band - Change It Up 004 NCIS-Theme Song 005 Bad Brains - Pay To Cum 006 Prong - Banned In Dc 007 Parliament - Give Up The Funk (Tear The Roof Off The Sucker) 008 Fugazi - Bulldog Front 009 KMFDM - Stars and Stripes 010 Dead Kennedys - Stars and Stripes of Corruption 011 Vlado Kreslin in Hans Theessink - Bourgeois blues 012 TROUBLE FUNK  - Spin Time 013 Ministry - Ass Clown 014 Marvin Gaye - What's Going On 015 X Files - Theme Song 016 Clutch - How To Shake Hands 017 The Rolling Stones - Sweet Virginia 018 Pig Destroyer - The Adventures of Jason and JR 019 Experience Unlimited - Da Butt 020 The Evens - Dinner With The President 021 Steppenwolf - Draft Resister 022 The Blackbyrds - Blackbyrds Theme 023 Oneness of Juju - African Rhythms 024 Pontiak - Ignorance Makes Me High 025 Ex Hex - Rainbow Shiner 026 Parliament Chocolate City 027 Bill Hayes - The Ballad Of Davy Crockett 028 Staple Singers - Washington, We're Watching You 029 The Razz - You Can Run (But You Cant Hide) 030 Criminal Minds TV theme bits 031 Clutch -  White's Ferry 032 Incredible Bongo Band -  Apache 033 Jimmy Newman - Washington, DC 034 CHUCK BROWN & THE SOUL SEARCHERS  - BUSTIN LOOSE 035 Weird Al Yankovic - Party In The CIA 036 Overkill - King Of The Rat Bastards 037 CANNABIS CORPSE - Zero Weed Tolerance 038 Funkadelic - One Nation Under a Groove 039 the coup - piss on your grave 040 Primus -  Electric Uncle Sam 041 Pocahontas OST - The Virginia Company 042 OFF! - Elimination 043 THE HONEY DRIPPERS - Impeach The President 044 Roy Ayers - D.C. City 045 Chain & the Gang - The logic of night 046 Pentagram - Walk Alone 047 Duke Ellington - Caravan 048 Clutch - Son of Virginia 049 The Messthetics - Serpent Tongue 050 House of Cards - Main Title Theme 051 Windhand - Old Evil 052 While Heaven Wept - Hour Of Reprisal 053 Genocide Pact - Induction 054 Nation of Ulysses ~ You're my Miss Washington D.C. 055 Minor Threat - Betray 056 ILSA - Cult Of The Throne 057 Stop the World-The Clash 058 The Dismemberment Plan - The City 059 Les Baxter - The City 060 America - Old Virginia 061 Talking Heads - Don't Worry About The Government 062 Gwar - The Reaganator 063 Junk Yard Band - Loose Booty 064 Chicago - State of the Union 065 Clutch - I Have The Body Of John Wilkes Booth 066 Carol Leon -  Washington, DC song 067 Rollins Band - Icon 068 COUGH - Crippled Wizard 069 The Magnetic Fields - Washington D.C. 070 Washington DC's new State Song, John Oliver 071 Alice In Chains - Never Fade 072 Animals as Leaders - Another Year 073 Deceased - Mrs. Allardyce 074 Tru Fax and The Insaniacs - Love Love Love 075 the hidden hand - someday soon 076 Sourvein - D.I.L.L.I.G.A.F. 077 Pig Destroyer - Alexandria 078 Drugs of Faith - The False War 079 Ex Hex - Diamond Drive 080 The Exorcist OST - Main Theme Tubular Bells 081 the slickee boys - gotta tell me why 082 Ministry - The Dick Song 083 Egg Hunt - We All Fall Down 084 Trouble Funk - Drop the Bomb 085 Q and Not U - End The Washington Monument (Blinks) Goodnight 086 Foo Fighters - Arlandria 087 Die Cheerleader - Washington D.C. 088 The Jesus Lizard - Queen For A Day 089 King Giant - The One That God Forgot To Save 090 Gil Scott Heron - Washington D.C 091 Unrest  - Bavarian Mods 092 Rites of Spring - For Want Of 093 American Dad! TV show theme 094 Readeez Presents The U.S. Presidents Song 095 Darkest Hour - No God 096 Fugazi - Facet Squared 097 Rollins Band - Wreck-Age 098 R E M - Don't Go Back To Rockville 099 Dag Nasty - Trying 100 Bad Brains - Rise 101 Municipal Waste - Masked by Delirium 102 Escape-ism - Bodysnatcher 103 Tilt - Arkade Funk 104 Nonchalant - 5 O'Clock 105 Jawbox - Savory 106 The Staple Singers - Long Walk To D.C. 107 Teen Idles - Fleeting Fury 108 Burnt by the Sun - Washington Tube Steak 109 Chain and the Gnag - [Ive Got] Privilege 110 Priests-  Ice Cream 111 Lamb of God - Checkmate 112 Lonnie Liston Smith - Sunburst 113 DEVO - Secret Agent Man 114 Duke Ellington - Money Jungle 115 Butch Willis - Flashback 200 William DeVaughn - Be Thankful for What You Got 222 Peabo Bryson - D.C Cab 666 Get Smart Original Theme

Baltimore 001 Divine - You Think Youre a Man 002 Bill Callahan - Javelin Unlanding 003 Clutch -  Pigtown Blues 004 Cry Baby Soundtrack - King Cry Baby 005 PIG DESTROYER - Baltimore Strangler 006 Loo Reed - Edgar Allan Poe 007 The Fleshtones - The Girl From Baltimore 008 Gram Parsons - Streets of Baltimore 009 Prince - Baltimore (feat. Eryn Allen Kane) 010 Mr Bungle - Carry Stress In The Jaw 011 george harrison - baltimore oriole 012 George Brigman - Jungle Rot 013 Primus - DMV 014 Strawberry Alarm Clock - Barefoot in Baltimore 015 Nina Simone - Baltimore 016 The Obsessed - Punk Crusher 017 Scott Walker - The Lady Came From Baltimore 018 Clutch - The Great Outdoors! 019 Frank Zappa - Whats New In Baltimore 020 Mother Freedom Band - Touch Me 021 Misery Index -  The Calling 022 Internal Void - Window to Hell 023 Trapped Under Ice -  Stay Cold 024 Agathocles -  Blatimore Mince Meat 025 FULL OF HELL - Deluminate 026 Dirt Woman - Fades to Greed 027 Wormhole - Nurtured in a Poisoned Womb 028 RHCP - Millionaires Against Hunger 029 Swell Fellas - Placebo 030 Clutch - Hot Bottom Feeder 031 Black Lung  - Ancients 032 Dying Fetus - Fixated On Devastation 033 Motorhead - Civil War 034 NOISEM - Deplorable 035 The Brandos - Gettysburg 037 Visceral Disgorge - Fucked into Oblivion 043 SECRET CUTTER - Trampled By Light 044 Cemetery Piss - Such the Vultures Love 045 Pig Destroyer - [Head Cage #04] Circle River 046 Pockets - Come Go With Me 047 War On Women - Confess 048 Horse Lords - Against Gravity 049 Cry Bay OST - Doin time for being young 050 Clutch - Earth Rocker 666 Locrian - Two Moons

And what a way to meet up in the middle with Clutch teaming up with randy from Lamb of God. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4Y6EVouZm-I

[signor-signor]

Trending 27th - January 2020

What have been your efforts in the campaign for SaveWOY and what are your upcoming plans to save WOY? Now this is a question worth answering!

In the past, I made a little list of the things I did to support SaveWOY and bring awareness to Wander Over Yonder’s existence and its third season plans. Since then, I’ve done a whole lot more from hand-drawn art to more intricate art. Some of them are almost as special as that signed poster @peepsqueak got from the WOY crew as a token of their gratitude.

Here’s an updated list of everything I did for SaveWOY so far:

Attended the SaveWOY picnic at Griffith Park, where I got to sign a banner.

Pointed out various higher-ups involved in the business of Disney television.

Sent several letters to the higher-ups, some of which had envelopes with an image of the downed space pod taped to them.

Started a weekly Twitter post series, SaveWOY Thought of the Week.

Made Lite-Brite art of Wander and Lord Hater, which Craig McCracken and Francisco Angones liked.

Attended D23 2017 with an Operation: FORCE drawing of Hater, a colored page of Wander and Sylvia and a few facts about WOY, and an orange pen with a green hat (I got the hat from the aforementioned picnic) - there, I signed a bench with Wander and the phrase, “Never hurts to help.”

Signed my name, drew Wander (and my own character, Jacken DeBox), and wrote, “Happiest place in outer space!” on the highest beam for Star Wars: Galaxy’s Edge.

Wrote a letter (and drew Wander) for the victims of the Las Vegas tragedy with the message, “The darkest times call for the sunniest smiles!”

Got Craig to reveal the name of the ship (said to play a BIG part in S3, made a cameo in Future-Worm) when I commented that we’d have to figure out the name - his response: “The ship is called The Star Nomad.”

Wrote a couple of cards to two Disney higher-ups with the message, “A little nice makes naughty think twice!”

Drew Dominator in a situation that might take place several seconds after she passes the downed space pod, just in time for Noël Wells’s B-day.

Made the Star Nomad with LEGO Digital Designer.

Made three images in the style of the original Star Wars trilogy VHS set.

Posted 50 WOYS3PredictionPolls on Twitter.

Made an image of “The First 5 Years” with over 140 individuals (including the question marks for 3 new mains and 2 new regulars - I still want to know what they look like!) and one cleverly made Hidden Mickey.

Shared WOY-related images from my 1st 5 Years fan art on Twitter acknowledging the B-days of most of the voice actors (Charlie Adler, Kevin Michael Richardson, Ken Marino, Josh Sussman, H. Michael Croner, James Adomian, Jason Ritter, and Piotr Michael clearly noticed).

Typed a summary of how I think the S3 premiere would go.

Typed lyrics to “Let’s Go Soarin’ and Explorin’,” a song from my aforementioned S3 premiere summary. Wouldn’t it be great if Andy Bean used it?

Made a microgame with WarioWare: D.I.Y. where the player has to spin the fan to make the Star Nomad fly. Part of a chorus from “Let’s Go Soarin’ and Explorin’” included.

Started FanCharacterFriday on Twitter - more Tumblr users seem to like Dr. Otmar Vunderbar.

Made a short comic page of Lord Hater trying to break out of the DTVA vault plus a sly reminder that Disney owns the rights to WOY.

Shared a list of potential episode titles for S3.

Made an actual LEGO Star Nomad based on the model made with LDD. Hopefully, those who worked on WOY have noticed. In case you missed it, here’s a picture...

Now, the ideas I have in mind for further boosting support for the campaign. I may not be able to do most of them myself, but they are certainly for everyone’s consideration.

Provide updated information of higher-ups (if any).

As soon as we find out what Kid Cosmic looks like, expect fan art of him saying, “Watch my show and tell your friends so we’ll make that Mousey Company pay for what they did to my half-brother!”

Another SaveWOY picnic - if there’s one in my general area, you can count me in.

LP album artwork of My Fair Hatey.

A mural identical to that of Super Smash Bros. Ultimate consisting of not just characters from WOY, but also characters who were said to debut in S3 and characters who’d fit in perfectly, namely some of my OCs.

Pumpkin stencils of the main characters for Halloween.

Drawings of various WOY characters stuck on the ex-secret planet explaining why they need to leave said planet. Maybe I could also show how the galaxy’s villains would react if they learn that Lord Dominator’s been bested by Lord Hater.

Drawings consisting of SaveWOY-related messages spoken by the main characters from Disney shows that got at least three seasons (e.g. DuckTales, Fish Hooks), tons of love from the viewers and the executives (e.g. Gravity Falls), or both (e.g. SvtFoE, Mickey Mouse ‘13).

Example with Phineas and Ferb:

Phineas: “We may be creative and famous, but we’re not the ones who came up with the Star Nomad. It’s the ship powered by orbbles! Orbbles! I’d LOVE to see it take flight, wouldn’t you? If you let Mr. McCracken end the show his way, and not the executive way, which, truth be told, is the absolute worst, Wander will surely be elated!”

Ferb: “The Orbble Transporter was invented by conjoined twin brothers, voiced by the performers of the theme song.”

Irving (peeking in from the side): “Speaking of voices, the titular main character sounds JUST LIKE ME! How could you possibly resist?! And look, just because I’m the biggest fan of these guys (gesturing to P&F) doesn’t mean I have no interest in what’s planned for the furry orange fella!”

Since I’m a full-time Disneyland cast member, I should be able to make contacts with anyone who might have more clues about what S3 would entail. It might be a long shot, but if I’m able to convince Disney that WOY’s influence on my life boosted my chance at gaining employment at the company, they should understand.

A weekly Jeopardy-type pop quiz on Twitter - here’s the catch: you must refrain from finding information online when you read the answer (I bet you that the most hardcore fans of the most popular shows will get most of the questions wrong).

Example: This arachnomorph got his name from a dog tag he swallowed when he infiltrated a fish-shaped ship. He later became Lord Hater’s beloved pet.

-Who is Captain Tim?

Summaries of S3 episodes I made up myself a while back.

More fan-made characters - my most recent is an elected official of Cluckon, Mayor Spye C. Drumstick.

Conjuring a logo that best fits the status of S3/TV movie - Wander Over Yonder: The New Galaxy (the center would have the silhouette of the Star Nomad with Wander and Sylvia on it).

Brainstorming possible ideas for the three new main characters.

If all else fails, I suggest we make a web comic based on the hints we accumulated back in 2016 and what we learned from the cameo in Future-Worm’s finale. Team Sea3on has been taking that approach for SatAM Sonic the Hedgehog S3, though they are also making an animated version.

That’s about all I’ve got so far. In closing, I have several questions to ask as the new decade kicks off.

Disney executives: Are you even listening to us WOY fans? What more do you want? I’ve done so much for the campaign that I feel I’m entitled to know everything that was planned for WOY’s third and final season, especially now that I’m working full-time for your company. If you tell us what your demands are, we’d be happy to oblige.

@crackmccraigen: Are you aware of how hard the fans and I have been trying to talk Disney into giving you the chance for true closure? We’ll make sure we watch KC when it comes out on Netflix. If we’re lucky, we might see WOY get added to Disney+, where it should get that closure, assuming you’ll have finished KC your way before then.

@suspendersofdisbelief: I know you’re super busy with DuckTales and you love the plans for WOY S3 so much that you can’t bear to reveal it all in one post, but it’s been waaaay too long since we got any hints from you. Are there any other WOY S3-related facts you could describe in much greater detail? The campaign could do with more motivation.

Non-WOY fans: Are you convinced? Need I remind you what’s in the end tag of the “last” episode of WOY? You know there’s much more to life than tales from the land of Ooo, a blue middle school cat boy in a world of unusual individuals, adolescent twins in an Oregon town filled with oddities, a half-gem half-human protagonist, a coming-of-age princess of Mewni, a trio of ursine trend-followers in San Francisco, and all that jazz. If you’re not one bit interested in Hater’s origin story and all that was planned for S3, it’s your loss.

Pessimists: Will you please dispense with this unnerving “Wander is dead” talk? As a certain Popeye would say, “That’s all I can stands, I can’t stands no more!” You’re not trying to let the Disney bosses win, are you? You probably used to think previously canceled shows like Hey Arnold!, Samurai Jack, and Young Justice could never be brought back. The point is, all is not lost.

@peepsqueak and WOY fans/SaveWOY supporters: Have I been of assistance? Almost every remark I’ve ever made shows wit and perception. I mean, just think. Wander is still stuck in that vault where his goal of reforming Lord Hater remains incomplete, and he has no idea of what threat awaits him. He says, “Glorn, help us.” It’ll take something big and extraordinary to convince every Disney fan (and perhaps every Netflix fan) to talk some sense into the higher-ups. Not to mention the replacement/back-up voice actors we’ll have to find if Disney takes even longer (we already lost one - René Auberjonois). We shan’t rest until we get the answers!

@disneyanimation

[canadian-buckbeaver]

Clueless Love - Bert Edition

(Trying to get in the habit of writing a bit everyday.  Enjoy my warm up writing that I did before I worked on commissions and patreon. Also blame @saiyurimai for helping to enable me)

Bert freed the monsters of UnderSwap, bringing them to the Surface to help them begin their lives anew.  Stretch and Blo, the wonderful skeleton sisters, live with him as they search for work that will help them become independent. Bert, knowing that he has caught feelings for the dazzling Stretch, tries to keep himself in check around her.  But she makes it hard some days.

This is one of those days.

Bert sighed as he fumbled with his keys, struggling slightly to open his front door.  It had been a very, very long day for him and he was looking forward to pulling a “Stretch” and catching a much-needed nap.  

It had been more than a few months since Bert had managed to free the monsters of UnderSwap, leading them to the Surface world.  For the most part, the majority of the monsters were settling in nicely with the other humans.  Alphonse, the Captain of the Royal Guard, was working with the army to help train soldiers of all shapes and sizes.  Thomas and Amanda were working towards opening a school for gifted monsters and slowly figuring out what their dynamic was.  Urnado was working with other scientists on various projects, helping to make the world a better place.  Everyone was slowly finding their niche in this new world.

Heck, even the skeleton sisters were adapting to this new world.

Finally fumbling the door to his little condo open, Bert stepped in to see (his little soul giving a little jump at the sight) the eldest skeleton sister stretched across the couch.  She looked rather comfortable and asleep.  Just like how he wanted to be.  Soon, he tried to soothe his tired bones, soon he too will be asleep.

But he knew that wasn’t the only thing that he wanted.

He hated working double shifts at the local hospital but the money was good… and the money was needed.  Stretch and Blo had only found part-time jobs, nothing that would be enough to live on their own, so Bert had invited them to live with him. They had opened their house to him in UnderSwap, it was only fair that he did the same.  Perhaps if he was being truly honest with himself, he would admit that that wasn’t the only reason why he had invited them to live with him.

Quietly he closed and locked the door behind him, shucking off his shoes at the door.

“did you have a good shift?”

Bert jumped at her voice, her warm tone sending shivers down his spine.  He looked back at the couch.  Stretch was peeking at him through half-lidded eyes, giving him a warm smile. “It was alright.  Very busy.  Cough and cold season seem to be hitting us early this year.” Bert told her, slipping off his jacket, exposing his scrubs under it.

Stretch chuckled before sitting up and walking over to him, taking the jacket from him and hanging it up into the nearby closet. Bert couldn’t help but notice how her ecto-body moved with every easy step. The sweater she wore did nothing to hide her curves. “well I’m glad that you made it home safe.” She said to him as Bert chided himself for being a pervert. Stretch was a friend, nothing more.

Not that he wouldn’t mind.  As odd as it was, he found himself rather attracted to the skeleton. She was funny, witty, kind, an exotic form of beautiful…. The list went on and on.  Anyone would be lucky to date her and she caught many an eye – human and monster alike.

Bert, on the other hand, was just plain old Bert.

“I am too,” Bert replied quickly, realizing that he hadn’t answered her.  He had to get his mind back on track. “Sorry Stretch.  I’m a little tired right now.  Not really all there.”

“I’m not surprised.  you helped so many people today and were on your feet for so long.  I don’t know how you do it.  come on with me and have your shower.  Blo was given a few new soap samples from that bath shop that she got an interview at.  I think that it would suit you.  I’ll even wash your back for you.”

With a nervous laugh, Bert allowed Stretch to lead him into his bathroom and start to prepare the shower for him.  “New soaps?  I’ll have to thank Blo.  Where is she by the way?”

Stretch didn’t even turn around.  “she’s out with Alphonse and Urando tonight.  they found an anime that they hadn’t seen before and wanted to have a marathon.” Stretch turned around to face him, a playful blush on her cheekbones.  “it’s just you and I tonight, big boy.” She purred.

“Really?  Well, that is unusual.  A good unusual mind you,” turning his back to Stretch he pulled the scrub top over his head, being careful not to touch it more than necessary.  It had been a messy and long shift.  “We should be naughty tonight.”

Thin, boney fingers gently pulled his undershirt from his bottoms. “oh really?  tell me, how exactly should we be naughty?”

“Well with Blo gone for the night we could order pizza to be delivered and have that for supper.  Thick crust, extra pepperoni and grease, the whole nine yards.  And I could use a beer or two.” Bert was thankful he had the next day off. Alcohol always made him tired.

The fingers pulled away.  “well, yes I suppose we could.”

“Certainty saves one or the both of us from cooking,” Bert chuckled.  “I’m going to jump into the shower real quick.  If you call the pizza place, I’ll be out before they arrive.”

“aw.  I was going to wash your back for you though.  anything that would help you to relax.” Bert’s horny imagination added a sweet lift to her voice, almost making it sound like Stretch was pouting.

Bert chuckled.  “I got my back, thanks. If you order the pizza that would be plenty of help.”

Stretch sighed and rolled her eye lights before leaving the bathroom, already tapping away on her phone.  Quickly Bert stripped and stepped into the shower, the warm water already making his dirty skin feel better, cleaner.  Stretch was such a big help sometimes.

* * * * *

Changing into some of his favourite relaxing clothes, Bert arrived just in time to watch Stretch take the pizza from the delivery guy. To his annoyance, he could see that the delivery guy was openly staring at Stretch in agape and wonder.  Yet, Bucky pushed those feelings aside.  Stretch did not belong to him.  “So… ugh… tell me you’re not stuck at home, eating a whole pizza by yourself this Friday night?” the boy asked, his voice cracking midway.  Bert would have cringed alone at the line.  The guy was probably not much older than high school age.

Stretch gave a giggle and shook her head.  “oh no.  luckily for me I have this handsome fella to help me out.” She seized Bert’s hand, pulling him in view of the delivery guy, and handing him the pizza. “hot and smoking, just the way you like it, dear.”  Her eyes slowly travelled up and down his body, taking him in.  “you’re wearing my favourite shirt!  I always love how the blue brought out your eyes.”

Bert chuckled.  He could almost hear the pizza guy’s porn dreams shatter into a million pieces.  “Thanks, Sugar.  You know how to spoil me.  Not to mention that you always had fabulous taste.” He kissed Stretch’s offered cheek, taking the pizza and carrying it to the couch.  Stretch had already set up the room. The coffee table had a beer and a bottle of honey, napkins, and a raised platter where they could put the pizza.  She had even lit a couple of candles, making the room smell nice.  Bert wondered if his shoes were smelling again.

“bye!  have a great night!” Stretch told the guy before closing and locking the door. Turning slowly, seductively, Stretch purred.  “are you ready to Netflix and chill, big boy?”

Bert was sure that his face lit up with a fierce blush before he laughed at Stretch’s fake attempt to seduce.  “Oh definitely.  Can hardly wait.  All night long, Honey-Buns. But remember that we aren’t allowed to watch Game of Thrones without Blo anymore so we’ll have to find a new show to watch for tonight. But come on over before the food gets cold.”

Stretch’s eye socket seemed to twitch as Bert picked up the remote and getting Netflix set up.  Bert suddenly had the feeling that he missed something.  “Did the delivery guy bother you?” he asked her carefully.

Stretch shook her head wildly.  “oh!  heavens no! he had just never seen a living skeleton so was just a little surprised is all.”

“Little surprised, my ass,” Bert muttered, turning the TV to some sort of comedy show, something that he knew that Stretch would like. He took a large bite of pizza, ignoring the scalding grease that ran down his throat.

“are you jealous?” Stretch asked him, slowly walking over to him, hips trading the fabric of her pants easily.

The words took a second or three to sink in.  Bert accidentally inhaled the pizza in his haste to disagree, coughing wildly to clear his windpipe.  “Stretch, why would I be jealous?  You’re my best friend.  I was just worried that he had said something that I didn’t catch or tried to touch you. Part of my job is to protect you after all.”

This was perhaps the wrong choice of words. Stretch came over and sat beside him, silently.  Bert was already beginning to regret his words, sensing that he had made her upset in some way. He was pleased when he saw her pick up a piece of pizza.  It was only after she covered it with honey that she began to eat.

At least she was eating.

Bert tried to ignore what she was doing to the poor pizza for a couple more slices.  It wasn’t any of his business and besides, Stretch had always had a bit of a sweet tooth. It was easier said than done, however, as the honey bottle would make all sort of noises.  The slow whine as Stretch squeezed it, the rattling as it reformed to its shape, the puttering as honey slowly oozed out of it.

“How can you eat that?” asked Bert, trying not to sound judgmental.

Stretch peeked over at him, still holding the bottle in one hand as she lined the remains of the crust with honey.  “hey now. some people deface pizza with ranch sauce, I prefer to perfect it by adding honey.”

“Now that I find difficult to believe,” Bert grumbled, shaking his head and finishing up his own slice.  “Pizza is already perfect.”

“hey, the honey really pulls the tomato sauce and the grease of the pepperoni together!” Stretch countered.  “you don’t know until you try it.”

With a chuckle, Bert shook his head, turning his attention back to the TV.  “I suppose you’re right,” he said, crossing his arms behind his head.  He was feeling a little better with food in his belly, less tired.

There was a slight pause before Stretch shuffled closer to him.  “do you want to try some?” the skeleton offered him, fluttering her eyes at him.

Bert knew that Stretch wouldn’t give up until he at least gave it an honest try.  “Sure,” He said, reaching out and pinching off a piece of the crust and popping it into his mouth.  Slowly he chewed, considering the taste.  It wouldn’t be his first choice but he had to admit that it seemed to work.  “Yeah, that’s pretty alright.  Though, as I said before, pizza is perfect on its own.”

Stretch said nothing, didn’t even move the honey bottle.  Bert, worried that he had somehow misunderstood what she meant, turned to face her, ready to apologize.

For a moment, all was still.  Suddenly, the skeleton was shaking so hard that her bones were rattling, clanking loudly.  Her eye lights went dim as they stared down at her knees, and still she said nothing.  She only rattled.

Truly concerned, Bert sat up, turning fully to face her.  Reaching out to her, he tried to calm her.  “Hey…” he got out.

Hey is all that he would get out.

Stretch’s eye lights blazed suddenly with bright light, flickering up to look up at him.  She sprang at him, catching him off guard, pushing him off the couch.  Bert yelped as he landed on the carpet, his spine not quite cushioning his fall.  Stretch seized his shoulders, pressing them to the carpet, pinning him, her eyes wild as she stared at him.  “WHAT WILL MAKE YOU UNDERSTAND ME?  DO I NEED TO DANCE NAKED IN FRONT OF YOU, OR ARE YOU TOO MUCH OF A BONEHEAD TO COMPREHEND THAT TOO?”

Bert’s mind was definitely swimming. “I… I… what?” he was trying to understand what he did wrong.

“I SENT BLO AND THE OTHERS OFF WITH THAT ANIME YOU RECOMMENDED THAT THEY TRY. I OFFERED TO SHOWER WITH YOU.  I FLIRTED.  I CLAIMED YOU AS MINE IN FRONT OF THAT DELIVERY DRIVER. I OFFERED YOU A TASTE OF HONEY AND PIZZA AND YET YOU TOOK THE CRUST.  I EVEN THREW OUT THAT TERM THAT YOUR HUMAN SHOWS ARE ALWAYS THROWING AROUND, ‘NETFLIX AND CHILL’ IN THE HOPES THAT YOU WOULD UNDERSTAND. AND YET YOU ACT ALL INNOCENT AND SWEET! I THOUGHT I KNEW HOW YOU FELT ABOUT ME. DO YOU NOT WANT ME?”

Her words were a rising tide.  Drowning him as he desperately swirled among their midst.  It wasn’t fair how now he could see all that she was trying to say to him.  “You…. You were flirting with me?”

Stretch gave a loud groan and she looked up to the heavens.  Probably seeking guidance from the heavens for his dumb ass.  “I have been for a while but thanks for noticing,” she finally said, her eye lights finally losing their crazed look to them.  She shook her head and sighed.  “Perhaps Blo was right.  I should have grown a spine and told you outright other than skirting the issue and hoping that you would understand.”

Bert couldn’t believe his luck.  Stretch… Stretch wanted him? The monster that could have anyone that they wanted and she had chosen him?

He couldn’t believe his luck.

“Better late than never, I suppose,” Bert said, his fingers slowly tracing her thighs, feeling her curves.  The soft, warm swell of her ecto-body, the sparking of magic underneath his fingertips.  He gripped her pelvis firmly, and ground up against her, rocking against her warmth, letting her feel what she did to him.  “But I do believe that it is my turn to claim you as my own.”

* * * * *

Bert slept soundly, snoring gently, one hand on his forehead, the other wrapped loosely around her ribs. Stretch rested her head on his chest, savouring the moment.  She could hear his heart thundering in his chest, under her skull.  She could smell his unique musk mingling with own, taste his salty sweat on her tongue.  Murmuring softly, she squeezed her thighs together, still feeling his mess between her legs.  She would be sore in the morning she knew, and she would have to explain a few of the bite marks that Bert had left on her neck.

But yet, she couldn’t stop the silly smile on her teeth. That had been worth everything.  The little outburst, all the work, all those little frustrations, everything.  She couldn’t wait to do it again.

At last, her senses still drunk off of him but finally closing her eyes, she settled her skull on his chest, dozing off.  

That night there were no nightmares.

Instead, Stretch dreamed of a human woman, one with long brown hair and brilliant blue eyes.  As the human turned to look back at them, the human image flashed quickly, changing.  In a heartbeat, Bert being shown in her place before the vision of the girl returned. Stretch smiled, instantly understanding her dream.  Gently she took the hand of the woman.  “We always find our way back together, don’t we, my dear?” she asked Bucky. 

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #196

“what separates man from beast? turn to your master.”

What's a show that you absolutely refuse to watch? 13 Reasons Why. How many times have you been in love? Twice. Do you remember how old you were when you started swearing? 7th grade, however old that is. How many years older than you would you date someone? ~9, maybe 10. Depends on just how much I'm interested in the person. What was the last thing you pinky-swore on? *shrugs* Don't even recall the last time I did that. Would you consider yourself a nice person? I think I am. Are you a car kind of fella? No. I don't even know the names of the most basic models. Are there a lot of mirrors in your house? Not at all. There's like... two. Who’s the laziest person you know? Proooobably me. True or false: Glee is annoying. All musicals make me cringe. Would you make a good teacher? Why? Fuck no. I'm not dealing with 20+ kids, and I'm also way too awkward for that. Is the fan on? Actually no. I have a small heater in my room that turns on/off to regulate the temperature. Otherwise, my room is frigid this time of year. Have you ever broken someone else’s bone? No. Do you really believe in your ‘one true love’? I don't believe in that concept. There's billions of humans on this earth; you don't have just one that you'd be wonderfully compatible with. Do you worry more about other people’s happiness than your own? It depends. Have you ever had feelings for 2 people at the same time?
 Yes, Jason and Juan until I picked between them definitively. You could also say Sara and Girt, but I'd come to learn my feelings weren't romantic towards Girt. Do you believe that leaving a significant other for someone else is ever a good idea? Sure; if you're even considering someone other than your s/o, that says something anyway. It's a far better alternative to cheating. Is it possible to ‘fix’ a ‘broken’ relationship?
 Mixed emotions, idk. Would you ever throw out/give away something an ex gave you?
 I've thrown out stuff, but I haven't given anything away, though I'd probably be able to. If you found someone seemingly perfect for you, but it turned out they had a child… would you still give the relationship a chance?
 No chance. Who is the first person you see in the mornings? Well, I live with only Mom. Who was the last person you were in love with for more than a year?
 In love, probably Jason. I consider someone being in love and just loving someone are of different intensities. Do you have a secret life?
 The RP site is unknown to just about anyone. Have you ever seen the last person you kissed without a shirt?
 Yes, but she was just changing her shirt rq, and I didn't really look anyway out of respect. Do your parents know EVERYTHING about you?
 No. Are you friends with your best friend’s boyfriend or girlfriend?
 She's the same person lmao. Favorite thing to eat with peanut butter?
 Jelly. If you had to get a piercing right now, what would it be? At this very moment, probably my left daith. Do you have a nervous habit? (e.g. biting nails, tapping feet, smoking) Most obviously, I knead my hands and I'm fidgety. My eyes dart around, and I bite my lip a lot. Current favorite song? I've been hopping around between a lot lately. Maybe "Counting Bodies Like Sheep To The Rhythm Of The War Drums" by A Perfect Circle. Do you know anyone famous? No. Do you own a Bible? No. Have you ever pierced your own body part or that of someone else? No. The last time you held a baby: Moooonths ago, like last summer when Colleen needed me to hold her son for whatever. The last form you filled out: Something for vocational rehab. The last time you stayed up past 12AM: Saturday night/Sunday to see the super blood wolf moon. It was incredible. The last time you gave up on or quit something: Well it's not like I'm ever doing anything noteworthy to remember quitting. The last video game you played: Some of The Legend of Spyro: Dawn of the Dragon. The last time you were in a big city: Not since March '18. The last television show you watched: Avatar: The Last Airbender with Sara. I'm surprisingly really into it and can't wait to keep going ahhhhhhh. Who was the last person you sat next to? My mom. Do you wear socks to bed? No, I hate socks. How many Canadian provinces have you been to? None. What kind of car did you take your drivers test in? N/A What is your first memory of being in a hospital? I have very faint memories of when I was a very little kid, my sisters and I played in the room where my mom and her three co-workers worked. I can't remember why we were ever there? All I know is we always wanted to go to the little gift shop to get candy lol. Does anyone in your life treat you badly? Are you allowing them to treat you that way? Or do you stand up for yourself? Not consistently. Have you ever cut someone out of your life because of how they treated you? Rather how she treated most of the human population. How much was the rent/mortgage at the cheapest place you’ve ever lived? Idk, probably here, where I think it's $700-something. Do you still keep in touch with your very first best friend? We're friends on Facebook, but that's it. Who got married at the last wedding you went to? Oh JEEZ. I think he was one of Ashley's co-worker's nephews or something like that?? I can't remember the exact connection, but it was complicated. What was your favorite home-cooked meal when you were a kid? Like, made from scratch? Um. I dunno. Nothing stands out. What was the topic of the last conversation you had with your dad? The laptop we're working on getting. Have you ever been to a wedding where the bride was a total bridezilla? No. How often did you visit your grandparents when you were growing up? Almost never. Dad's were in Ohio, Mom's mother was in Florida (my grampa died when I was like, two), and here we are in NC. We couldn't afford to travel much. Have you ever had psoriasis? I don't think so? I do have super dry skin, but I don't think I've ever had scaly patches. How much of your time to do you spend being bored? What could cure that boredom? Almost every day past afternoon, really... and having shit to do that doesn't confine me to this house, or have Sara here. Do squeaky toys annoy you? Yes. Animals: love ‘em? Why or why not? I absolutely love them; they're our neighbors. It's amazing how creatures that can't speak can be so interesting. Is a solitary person necessarily an unlikable person? Um, no. Are you a picky eater? You have ABSOLUTELY no idea. If you play Sims, have you ever saved a Sim from death? I've played the animals one, in which case, yes, lol. Are you hopelessly addicted to the computer? Admittedly so. Almost everything I do is on there, and it's sad just how lost I am on what to do if I don't have WiFi or a gaming console. I've been this way since I was a pre-teen though, so it's not exactly something I think I can un-learn. Like I'm not one of those people who puts every opportunity behind sitting here on it at least, I'll happily jump up for something fun and/or interesting, but it's still my go-to thing to do. Do you prefer online or face-to-face communication? Why? Depends on the person and my mood, but more often than not, online because I'm a socially awkward abomination. What kinds of things do you watch on YouTube? Let's plays mostly, but also random shit from some people I'm subscribed to, beauty videos with Jeffree Star solely because I love that hoe and am there for his personality, uhhh other misc. things that make me laugh. If you’re offered a trip to either Hawaii or Alaska, which would you choose? Probably Alaska, esp. if it's a good season for the Northern Lights. Do you have any close friends that were adopted? No. If you could have any job/talent, what? (regardless if can or not)? Hyperrealistic traditional artist or meerkat biologist. Who, in your opinion, is the best thriller writer? I wouldn't know. Does your mom eat meat? Yes. Was your dad ever in a sports team? Yeah. Do you prefer thick or thin crusted pizza? I stroooongly prefer thick. Thin is just flaky and hard. Have you ever had an eerie/paranormal experience? What happened? A lot. The top two that scared me the most follow: 1.) I was home alone, very late in the night watching TV, and Teddy, who was glued to me, would not look away from the bottom of the bed and was barking and growling relentlessly. I even tried forcing his head to look away with how badly it was scaring me, but he absolutely would not let it. Me personally, I "felt" a strong and malevolent female presence just fucking staring at me, and I called my mom literally crying. I was so shaken up that at like 4:00 A.M. I think it was, she had to call our poor neighbor to sleep in the house with me. Safe to say, I did not sleep in my bed; I'm pretty sure I didn't for a good few days. 2.) I was outside one night, walking with my iPod as I did most nights. I suddenly stopped dead when I saw this white, transparent thing walk very fluidly out of the woods of my backyard and just vanish. It was fucking crazy because it felt like time had slowed, and I remember perfectly it looked like a bipedal creature walking on all fours instead, but it was not a fucking human or animal. It reminded me of some Rake depictions (which I don't really believe in), but not precisely. My entire body absolutely chilled, and I was like a deer in headlights for many seconds, but after that, I have never run faster than I did going back inside. I immediately told my mom, freaking the hell out, but who knows if she believed I actually saw something. I didn't do nighttime walks for I think around a week, and for a loooong time, I'd altered my path so I couldn't see the spot it had appeared, and I over my dead body would ever go to the clearing at night. I also either saw a star do some weird-ass shit over the course of a week or so, or it was some UFO doing something okay only facts here. All three of these things happened at our old house, sooo glad that is no longer home lmao. Do you have any friends with the same name as you? No. How many people of the same name as you have you ever met? Oh jeez, plenty. How often do you see your best friend? Our history so far has been every ~2-3 months. Do you like incense or does it give you headaches? I love that shit oml. Do you prefer to watch or attempt? Depends? Do you shout when you’re upset? Occasionally. Where was the last place you ate, except from home? I believe Wendy's. What was your favorite thing to do as a kid? Play Spyro or make-believe with my favorite toys. Do you take any vitamins? Which ones? Yes, for vitamin D, as my deficient of it beforehand was absolutely abysmal, and it was probably the cause of my knees wanting me dead. Have you ever lost something really precious to someone else? Maybe? Who makes you feel small/inferior? It's entirely unintentional, but my psychiatrist, ha ha. He is a fucking genius with incredible knowledge of like... everything. Are you protective of your family? Well yeah. I'm especially protective of my younger sister, but not like, incredibly. What size ring are you? Idr. What’s something you regret buying, but you just can’t get rid of it? Sad as it is to say, my rat Mitsu. She's nervous of being held, yet she always jumps up onto the cage's bars when I'm passing and enjoys me petting her through them, but that's all I can do, and I feel awful. Her claws also reeeaaally irritate my skin (maybe from the bedding, idk), but getting rid of a pet rat isn't exactly easy, especially with the fear of her being bought merely as food. What villain do you believe is most worthy of a redemption arc? Is Harley Quinn still even a villain??? What was your favorite school project you ever made? Idr. What role do you take on when you have to do a group project? (for example: leader, delegator, slacker, etc.) The meticulous writer/taking the notes. What’s a funny mistake you’ve made recently? Oh boy, how is nothing coming to me among certainly a million options in the back of my mind??? OH WAIT. I was texting Sara and mentioned I was watching Shane Dawson, but it autocorrected to "Shame," and I was like, "still accurate." What would be your reaction if one of your parents said they were having another kid? My mom's long past that age. And my parents are divorced. How many friends do you have that don’t live in the same country as you? One of my long-time Internet buds, off the top of my head. What is always in your wallet that doesn’t need to be? HAHA. One time in high school, me a few friends got together to just wander the mall. We went into a tux store and got a card there for literally no reason, but it's still in my wallet for memory's sake. What is a strange red flag you have when pursuing a relationship? Excessive and/or raunchy flirting. If a single thing you say fits the latter, you're fucking out. How many people have you thought “Glad I don’t have to interact with them ever again” about? Probably a decent number. What do you NOT want on your tombstone? Don't mention shit about God or Jesus or whatever. How many couches do you want in your residence? One long one or two average ones for the sake of accommodating company. What is the strangest website you have bookmarked? Nothing strange. What is your typical number of windows/tabs open on your computer? Ha, usually 4-5 tabs. Sometimes more, sometimes just two or three. Do you follow the expiration date on food? Like, religiously. What is the coolest name that you would never name a real human child? "Magnus" is the first that came to me. What fish scares you the most? Probably stonefish. Hard to spot 'em, venomous as hell, enough to sometimes kill. How do you feel about snails? In almost all cases, they gross me out. Just not as much as slugs. I hate slimy things. How often do you think about what guys will think of you? The older I get, the less I give a fuck what one thinks, at least about how I look. If you are on birth control that allows you take pills and skip your period, how often do you opt to skip it? How come? I can't skip mine. Is there a book series where you loved the first book, but for some reason the other books in the series just didn’t measure up? Idr. Are there any stores/restaurants that you would like to shop/eat at, but there aren’t any located near enough to you? Oh, I'm sure. I'd have to think. If you are a part of a certain fandom or are a fan of a popular series/musician, is there a rivalry between your fandom and another one (e.g., Lady Gaga fans vs. Katy Perry fans or Marvel vs. DC)? The Silent Hill and Resident Evil franchises are often compared, but I haven't seen much "rivalry." There are some people who pit Markiplier and JackSepticEye against each other with them being close in subs, but it's wonderful that I usually see only great bonding between the two fandoms instead, and they usually overlap with fans. Metallica is constantly shit on by Slayer fans. There's more, I'm sure, but I don't feel like digging deep into the thousand fandoms I'm in lmao. Do you ever have smell hallucinations? Don't think so. If you were told by a professional that you were unable to become pregnant, how would that affect you? Is there something important to you about conceiving a biological child rather than adoption? And finally, if you even want to have children, would you choose adoption or surrogacy or would you go on childless? Honestly? I'd be fucking ecstatic. I'll probably never have hetero sex ever again, but rapists always worry me. I don't at all want kids. Is there something that you did not used to take seriously, that you either now take seriously or wish that you had in the past (e.g., a relationship that you miss, your education, etc.)? Man, I don't know. I would say my college, but I didn't really have a choice in my decrepit mental state, and fuck that school from a trillion different angles anyway. Are you physically affectionate with your friends? Just with hugs. I'm not a platonic cuddler/kisser/hand-holder. Are any of your friends/relatives actually impressive artists or writers? Are you willing to share an example of their work? My cousin is an incredible artist, but I don't believe I've seen her work in years. When it comes to relationships/crushes, are you more often the pursued or the pursuer? Pursued, I guess. Do you ever find yourself making negative comments about other people’s appearances, whether it’s people you dislike or even just people on tv? I generally keep comments to myself. Have you ever dated someone on the football team? No. Do you have any ceramic animals in your house or outside? There is this pointless dolphin in the corner of our backyard?????????? Why????????????? Who made you???????????????? Have you ever made a summer bucket list? No. Have you ever stayed in a hotel suite? No. What type of waffles do you like? (Plain, blueberry etc..) Plain or chocolate chip, 'pending on the mood. Have you ever been to a night club? No. What was the last thing to make you sad? A picture on Facebook of some dick posing beside an elephant he killed at a watering hole. It was in an anti-trophy group or something like that. Do you kill spiders when you see them? If it's in my house and not tiny, unless it's too close to me. Are you allergic to any animals? Which ones? No. Does it bother you when people play with your hair? It would if it was anyone but my s/o or maybe my mom, but even from her, that might feel weird. What is your favorite movie series? SHREK, BITCH. I haven't seen the fourth one though and I am legitimately mad. Not sayin' it for the meme, I legit love Shrek okay. Did your parents get married before or after you were born? I actually found out recently it was after I was born. True/False: You’ve had an odd dream this week. It's weird, I've actually been briefly recalling them lately... but not for long. I believe I have, though. Who was the last person to let you down? Mom, probably. Can you dry swallow pills? I'm capable with small capsule ones, but I don't. What was the last thing you ordered online? Sara's Christmas present. Are you happy with your relationship with God, or do you want more from it? I have no relationship with him, if you're addressing the "God" I'm assuming you do. Even with the entity I believe in, I don't really see us as having a "relationship" in this life. They're just my silent judge that sees me according to how I deserve. Is your spirit made for adventure? Eh. Yes and no. Have you ever been rejected by a church? No.

[speedsiteshoe]

Pokepark 2 wii wonders beyond

There aren’t many, but they are kind of fun and can be replayed in local multiplayer whenever you’re bored with the main quest.Īs far as Wii titles go, Pokepark 2 is damn pretty with fluid animations for all the Pokemon and endlessly adorable visuals even in the loading screens. The mini-games are all variations on sidescolling platforming, simple shooters, and little puzzles.

Again, it’s incredibly easy to use for little tykes playing this game, but until later stages with many enemies, the battles can be frustratingly easy. The turn-based battle system of the core Pokemon titles is replaced by a simplified version routed mostly in button mashing. You’ll find yourself constantly tapping the dash button and it never seems to be fast enough. Moving around the worlds can be a pain because these cute little fellas have tiny legs, making them incredibly sloooooow. This lends itself to a simple button layout, but with only a single D-pad for movement, it’s far better suited to sidescrollers than 3D games and there will be camera issues from time to time. The game is controlled by holding the Wiimote on its side. You can only play as one of those main four characters, but you’ll encounter about 100 or so other Pokemon along the way and make friends with them by either getting into a fight, getting into a chase, or playing one of a handful of mini-games. Much of the game consists of roaming around PokePark and befriending other Pokemon (via a menu based Pokedex-style system) to find ways to slip back into Wish Park and save the cake-munching lost souls. You play as Pikachu, Oshawott, Tepig, and Snivy. Yep, that’s the plot and it makes about as much sense played out over a full game as it does in that single mind-numbing sentence. It’s about evil creatures kidnapping Pokemon from their PokePark home and transporting them to the dark n’ brooding Wish Park where they are hypnotized by cake. Story has never really been the strength of the Pokemon series (did you ever try to follow the “plot” of the TV show? Well, don’t) and PokePark 2 is no exception. It’s an almost obnoxiously cute little timewaster that I’m sure will please the pint-sized target audience while leaving anyone old enough to remember a world without Pokemon in the cold. PokePark 2: Wonders Beyond is Nintendo’s latest console Pokemon effort and presumably the final one that will be produced for the Wii. We’re talking about cute little animals bumbling around and getting into magical fights and there is an unavoidable age cap on that experience. The franchise is one of Nintendo’s staples, but with the exception of the fairly deep RPG-lite handheld titles, these games are really just for kids. When you’re talking about games like Mario Galaxy or the latest Zelda epic, the company cranks out stunningly-crafted and all-inclusive experiences guaranteed to make any player feel like a giddy eight year old discovering videogames for the first time.

While Sony and Microsoft are constantly discovering new ways for players to machine gun and chop up fresh characters, Nintendo prides itself on simple, fluffy, family-friendly entertainment. Nintendo has long branded itself as the Disney of the videogame world.

[charlyritter]

hey fellas new meme for those who’ve been here for a while, take an old ask meme you reblogged (remember when those existed!!) and see if your answers are still the same, imma just start with this one I answered in 2013 or 14

new answers are in italics

Name: sabrina | same... Nickname: my friends call me Biene (german for bee; my family says Bienle because yes hi i’m from southern germany), my brother has like 10,000 different nicknames for me | same (oh man this could be more boring than I thought), my brother’s still the best brother in the world just to give you an update on that Location: germany | same -.- Age: 21 | 25 (wtf, I am not immortal o.O) Height: 1.60cm | I grew a lot, I am actually 2m tall now (jk, same) Any pets: no | same :( Favourite thing @ yourself: best taste in tv ever known to mankind | still p much the only thing I got going for myself! Worst habit: i’m scared of pretty much everything | oh my god!! same!! why!! Fun fact: i made vegetarian burgers today and they looked like shit but tasted awesome and the moral of the story is that sometimes it’s really easy to make me happy | I made potato-pumpkin casserole today and something I learned about myself is that I find it hard to come up with fun facts that are not food-related

Identity, Sexuality & Personality

Gender identity: female | same Sexual preference: idk | same Romantic preference: idk | same “Kinsey Scale” score: i don’t even have to do this anymore i always get ‘not sexual’ | same omg Relationship status: single until the end of time | ................... Myers/Briggs type: idk | yep, still too lazy to do those test Hogwarts house: idk | still don’t get the concept of a hogwarts house

Routine

“Early Bird” or “Night Owl”: night owl that sometimes transforms into early bird because i stay up so late that there’s no point in going to bed anymore | luckily my sleeping pattern’s not quite as horrendous anymore, will still never be able to alter my biorhythm to that of an early bird (which btw is not a thing, I’ve read a book on it) but I’m very happy and content with getting up between 8 and 9 nowadays considering 11 was “getting up early” for me for YEARS. Morning routine: get up ten minutes before i have to leave, curse a lot | most of the time I have the time to have a cup of coffee nowadays. Bath or shower: showers | same First thought in a morning: ugh ('shit’ when i’m really late) | idk I guess that’s my VERY first thought but I do also get ridiculously excited about getting to drink coffee anew every single day and I don’t get why  Last thought before falling asleep at night: can i please just fall asleep already | pls don’t ever let me get insomnia that bad again lol

School/Work

Do you work or are you a student: student who’s looking for a part-time job | omg same why am I still so horrendous at getting and keeping jobs goddammiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit Where do you work/study: at…uni?? i’m not sure if i get the question | still think the question’s weirdly phrased, still at university What do you do: i’m a translation student (english + french) | same Where do you see yourself in 5 years: hopefully happy | I’ll have a Master’s degree in translation, I’ll have lived abroad for a year, I’m working a job that’ won’t make me rich but is reasonably well-paid, maybe as a project manager or general translator, and gives me 30 days off per year which I use to travel more, I still don’t own a decent apartment because I’m saving up all my money to travel, I’m volunteering at an animal shelter

Habits (Do you … )

Drink: very rarely | same Smoke: no | same Do Drugs: no | I mean, I have smoked weed since back then but that doesn’t count does it (and I don’t really smoke weed in Germany) Exercise: sometimes | currently at least 3 times a week but I try to get more workouts in Have a go-to comfort food: it used to be gummy bears but then i went vegetarian and now…it’s vegetarian gummy bears?? i don’t really know but i’m sure it’s some kind of candy | still don’t have that one go-to food Have a nervous habit: i bite my lip | huh. I don’t actually think I bite my lip......? 

What is your favourite … ?

Physical quality (in yourself): my hands | same In Others: hair i guess | same I guess Mental/emotional quality (in yourself): i’m never bored | same (also remember when we didn’t capitalize ‘I’ lol) Food: pizza/pasta | same Drink: caffeine-free diet coke, mineral water and right now every variation of this | oh god remember when I still drank coke, EEEEEWWWW (other than that same re: the water and I’m sure I just forgot to mention coffee?!!) also gotta love that camouflaged advertising for Ensinger haha Animal: frogs/toads | omg I thought that was a more recent thing? but yeah same obvi Artist/Band/Group: pink floyd is my to-go band but really i listen to lots of different stuff by lots of different people so i don’t know | still not good at listening to music Author/Poet: oh god. so many | hm? TV Show: breaking bad | same Actor/Actress: colin firth | same

[sorenserotonin]

Momentary Losers chapter 3

AO3 link

chapter 1 chapter 2

Summary:  Richie and his bandmates get back from a tour to meet Stan's boyfriend Bill, and Bill's small and anxious best friend Eddie. From the moment they met, Richie was infatuated, but he was sure Eddie hated his guts. How could he not? Richie was everything Eddie wasn't. Little did Richie know, everyone has a little bit of a "Total Disaster" in them.

Ships: Richie Tozier/Eddie Kaspbrak, Stanley Uris/Bill Denbrough, Beverly Marsh/Ben Hanscom, Mike Hanlon/Richie Tozier, Stanley Uris/Mike Hanlon (eventually)

warning for drug use, mentions of underage sex (its natural for teenagers to do things at that age, and its not explicit don't worry), a down day in depression, and adults had sex (again not explicit)

Richie was laying on the living room floor facetiming Mike. He smiled at the sight of Mike petting the puppy that slept on his chest. “I can’t make it,” Mike gave a pout and Richie’s smile fell. “I got that charity event.”

Richie groaned. “I don’t wanna third wheel Stan and Bill,” he sat up. “Can’t you save animals the next day?”

Mike rolled his eyes. “You’ll have Bev,” he licked his lips.

“She and Ben have date night that night,” Richie ran his hand through his hair.

Mike pursed his lips, thinking. “Ask Eddie if he’ll go,” he suggested.

Richie hadn’t thought of asking the smaller man. He didn’t know how he felt about Eddie, other than thinking he was cute. He wondered if Eddie would even agree. He sighed and scratched his head. He said goodbye to Mike and hung up. He immediately regretted hanging up, missing the comfort of seeing his friend and the small animal.

He bit his lip as he opened Eddie’s contact information. The contact photo he used of the smaller man was a four panel comic of a man dressed as a flower asking to be pissed on. He snorted, mumbling to himself and he pressed the call button. “And just let him fucking die?” he laughed as he waited for Eddie to pick up.

“Richie?” Eddie asked.

Richie smiled. “Hey, Eds,” he bit his lip to stop laughing.

Eddie sighed. “Don’t call me that,” he stated. “Why did you call me?”

Richie furrowed his brow. “Well I won’t tell you if you ask in that tone, Spaghetti Man.”

Richie could hear anger bubbling in the way Eddie breathed. Richie wondered if the man took the teasing the same way Stan did or if the anger was real. “Is there a specific reason you called me? I was in the middle of making lunch.”

Richie could hear the sound of Amy Winehouse playing from Eddie’s speaker. “Me and Stan were invited to do a video with some website and we can bring a plus one each. Stan is taking Bill, I was wondering if you wanted to come with?”

He heard Eddie’s breath hitch. Before Eddie could answer there was a clatter and Eddie hissed. “Shit,” he whispered.

“Everything good?” Richie asked.

“Yeah I just dropped a knife on my foot-”

“Do you need to see a doctor?” Richie quickly asked.

Eddie took a deep breath. “No, it was the handle of a butter knife. I just have to clean it up.”

Richie was relieved to hear that Eddie was okay. “So you gonna do the porno or no?” he decided to lighten the mood.

He heard Eddie guffaw. “What?!” he exclaimed.

“The internet would go wild, I mean my nudes somehow haven’t leaked,” Richie shrugged.

“Richie, no-”

Richie saw Stan walking down the stairs. “Calm down, Eds, it was a joke. Stan would never agree to fucking me on camera,” Richie smirked as he interrupted Eddie.

“I wouldn’t want to catch anything,” Stan projected his voice, enough so Eddie could hear him.

“Richie what is this actually about? Don’t you dare say it’s a porno,” Richie could hear Eddie licking something off of his fingers.

He glanced at Stan. “It is a video, that wasn’t a joke. It’s just an interview thing with a fan that runs a website. She knows who Stan is because she’s been to almost every show. Bev and Mike can’t make it,” Richie grabbed Stan’s hand when the other man sat on the couch.

“I guess, I can drive if you guys want,” Eddie replied.

After discussing the details, Richie hung up. He was still holding Stan’s hand and sitting on the floor. He placed his phone in his pocket and stood up, grabbing Stan’s other hand. He pulled Stan off the couch, now they were standing. Richie wiggled his body a bit and Stan gave him a blank stare. Richie smiled wide. “We got a ride to the interview.”

“Okay…”

Richie stopped moving. He frowned at Stan. “Is today a bad day?” When Stan sat on the couch again, not letting go of Richie’s hands, Richie didn’t need an answer. Richie looked down at Stan, squeezing his hands. He smiled again. “You don’t know the last time I washed my hands.”

Stan attempted to escape Richie’s grasp, but couldn’t. “God, you’re disgusting, stop I can see the dirt under your fingernails.”

Due to his bad mood, Stan invited Bill over to cuddle and watch a movie. Richie scoffed and said that he could have done that. Since Mike was leaving for a charity event in New York the next afternoon, Richie had suggested he join them. He didn’t say that it was also because he didn’t want to be a third wheel, but everyone knew that was also a reason.

Surprisingly, Mike and Bill arrived at the same time. When Richie opened the door, Bill was laughing at something Mike said. “I reckon you fellas are getting along good,” Richie did a terrible southern accent and Mike rolled his eyes.

Richie stepped aside, letting them inside. Mike was holding a plastic bag, Richie reached for it and Mike swatted his hand. “This is for Stan,” he informed.

Stan walked into the living room wearing his pajamas. “Mike,” he smiled, hugging the man in question. Mike patted Stan’s back, smiling, his eyes meeting Richie’s. They separated, and Mike handed the bag to Stan. “Thank you,” Stan said quietly. He opened the bag and looked inside. He then, looked at Mike. Richie couldn’t see his expression but he saw the way Mike seemed to brighten up. Richie caught the way Bill’s face kind of fell. “Mike, you didn’t have to do this,” Stan whispered, affection dripping from his voice like melted ice cream.

Mike blushed lightly and rubbed the back of his neck. “You know that I do this every time you get like this,” Mike smiled.

Richie realised what was in the bag instantly. “Mike’s special homemade vegan yogurt,” he nodded. “Micycle, you better give me the special non-vegan yogurt later,” he winked.

Mike scoffed. “Rich, you’re disgusting,” Richie laughed.

Stan walked over to his boyfriend, and Bill finally smiled. They hugged and kissed, and Richie rolled his eyes. He sat on the couch, Mike sitting next to him. Stan closed the front door and then grabbed Bill’s hand. He brought him to the couch. Bill sat next to the arm, giving Stan room between him and Mike. Stan kissed his knuckles and left the room to get a spoon.

Richie mockingly grabbed Mike’s hand and kissed his knuckles. “Oh, Billy boy I sure do love you’re hands,” he loudly said, in a horrible Stan impression.

Mike rolled his eyes and Bill looked at Richie as if the man had challenged him. “Kissing knuckles a-aren’t the only things my ha-hands are good for,” he smirked.

Richie laughed. “Ooo, Bill Denbrough gets off a good one!” Richie leaned into the couch, putting his feet on the coffee table.

Stan walked back into the room. “I don’t even want to know what was said when I was gone,” he said as he sat on the couch in a way that Richie called ‘criss cross applesauce’. Stan opened the tupperware container and looked at Richie. “Can you turn on a movie or a TV show? At this point I don’t care.”

Richie nodded and used the PlayStation to open Hulu. “What genre?” he asked.

Stan shrugged. “Comedy I guess… as long as I don’t wish I could be as happy as them,” Richie smirked. He quickly put on an episode of It’s Always Sunny In Philadelphia. Stan groaned. “Richie you know I hate this show.”

Richie put the controller on the floor. “Shut up, just watch the episode.”

Stan reluctantly watched the episode, eating the yogurt with a frown on his face. He leaned back into the couch, tilting his head toward Mike. Bill bit his lip and took a deep breath. Richie was watching them, just trying to see how Stan was. He just wanted to see how Stan would react to the episode he chose.

When Dennis opened the crate with the rocket launcher inside, Stan was leaning against Mike with his legs in Bill’s lap. Richie was bearing the weight of both Mike and Stan, Mike leaning on his shoulder. Mike had fallen asleep 10 minutes into the episode. Richie didn’t understand how the man could nap during the shown known for the characters screaming at each other. Richie noticed that Stan offered Bill some of his yogurt. Bill declined, saying it was for Stan. Stan rolled his eyes and said that he wanted Bill to try it. Bill complied and basically moaned at the taste. Stan smiled, “what do you think?” he asked.

Bill licked his lips. “That was d-delicious.”

“Stan, I think he might want to have some time alone with the yogurt,” Richie said, keeping his voice at a level to not wake Mike up.

“Rich, you don’t have to whisper,” Mike said, shocking Richie. Stan let out a bark of laughter, at Richie’s expression.

Richie put on 50 First Dates, with no protest. He almost wanted to turn the movie off to spite their lack of reaction to Adam Sandler. “Can’t believe you’re letting me do this.”

Mike placed his hand high up Richie’s thigh. “I love Drew Barrymore,” he said, his voice quiet enough so only Richie could hear.

Richie adjusted his sitting position, knowing that his face was bright red. He handed the controller to Stan. “Have fun,” he said quickly.

Mike got up, Stan moving to lean on Bill. Bill looked more satisfied than he had the whole time he was there. Richie quickly got up, darting upstairs. He heard Mike’s footsteps, and connected his phone to the speakers on his dresser. When Mike closed the door, the playlist started. Mike crashed his lips against Richie’s, pulling him close.

When Richie took off the black bowling shirt with neon flames, Mike pulled their lips apart. “Really? Panic is on your sex playlist?” he smirked, pulling off his shirt.

Richie unbuttoned his matching jeans. “Can you blame me? Brendon’s voice is bound to give anyone a hard on.”

Stay for as long as you have time

So the mess that we'll become

Leaves something to talk about

Richie woke up to the sight of Mike Hanlon putting one of the only not tacky shirts that Richie owned. He couldn’t tell what he was looking at due to the lack of contacts or glasses. Mike handed him his glasses, and smiled. Richie put his glasses on and smiled at the sight of Mike wearing his Aerosmith shirt. “Good morning,” he said.

“We need to talk,” Mike said quietly, his smile not falling. It didn’t reach his eyes, though.

Richie sat up, stretching his tattoo covered arms and yawning. “You don’t want me to ride your Micycle?” he didn’t know why his stomach was turning. He chose to believe it was the lack of wake up coke.

Mike sat on Richie’s bed, no longer looking at him. “Yeah, Richie,” he paused. “I think we should stop this.”

Richie nodded. “I have something to tell you.”

Mike finally looked at him. “Please don’t hate me,” he said quietly.

Richie shook his head. “I could never hate you, you’re Mike fucking Hanlon. Homeschool, Micycle, Mikey, Mike and Ike,” he ran out of nicknames, licking his lips. “Do you remember that night?”

They were sixteen, the last two at the quarry after a summer day in the sun. They were in the bed of Mike’s truck, both wrapped in their towels. “You talk a big game, Trashmouth,” Mike began. “Have you ever actually…?” his voice was quieter this time.

Richie pushed his glasses up the bridge of his nose. “Yeah, of course, dude.”

Mike looked at him, hesitant. “I trust you… I’m still a virgin…”

“Yeah?” Mike replied, furrowing his brows.

Richie looked down. “I lied. You were actually my first time.”

Richie knocked on Stan’s window. Stan opened the window, wiping his eyes. He was wearing polka dot pajamas. “What?” his voice was raspy with sleep.

“Stan, I have to tell him it was my first time. How do I tell him?” Richie wasn’t thinking. He couldn’t think since Mike kissed him.

Stan squinted at him, then looked at the clock on his dresser. “It’s 3 AM, I have no idea who you’re talking about.”

“Why did you lie?” Mike asked, standing up. “I mean yeah i kinda assumed you did lie, but why are you telling me now and not then?”

“Mike it’s been almost ten years. I was a dumb kid and I actually don’t know why I didn’t tell you. I wanted to, I just didn’t know how you would react,” Richie was babbling. He got out of his bed, thankful he had the decency to put his boxers on last night. He extended his hand.

Mike took a step back and Richie wanted to cry. “Don’t touch me, I can’t believe it took you almost a decade to tell me you lied to me about that on that night.”

“I didn’t want to lose your trust-”

“Then you should have told me!”

“Micycle-”

“No, Richie! We can’t keep screwing each other, especially now.”

Richie took a deep breath, pushing his hair out of his face. “I get that! Just please tell me why you want to stop, so I don’t feel like a complete ass.”

“I just can’t keep doing this. The way we act every morning after. I don’t want to have to pretend I don’t hear you snort a line in the bathroom when you wake up. I don’t want to think that me having feelings for someone will ruin our friendship. I just don’t think us having sex is good for out friendship. The band went on a no tour hiatus two years ago because we didn’t know if it was awkward to do normal friend stuff because we agreed to no romance. I don’t want to lose you and this sex stuff has caused both of us to not go after people we wanted something serious with. I want to be at least somewhat normal,” Mike’s voice broke on the last sentence.

“Fine. Then go. Go to your fucking charity and take pretty girls on dates and fuck them. I’ll do the same fucking thing,” Richie didn’t know why he was lashing out. He just knew he needed coke to be able to deal with this.

Mike rolled his eyes. “Goodbye Richie. Get high and burn some pancakes.”

Richie slammed the bathroom door at the same time that Mike slammed the bedroom door. Richie dumped a bit of the familiar white powder on the counter. He used the small razor he kept in the drawer to cut the powder into a line. He grabbed the straw and was finally able to breathe when he inhaled. He rubbed his nose, ignoring the drop of red on his hand.

Tag List

@lousytrashmouth @beepbeepbabe @queertrashmouth @gospelofthewitch @harringrovesucks @festive-wheeler @rochibi @burymestanding @i-is-gazebo @ohheydatsme @supernaturalslytherinintheimpala @maisy-the-fangirl @novopsi @sweetbadheart @sugarandsaltandeverythingthot @colorful-dodie @aristosachaiov @bitchierrichie @arklcat 

ask to be added to the tag list! this is a slow burn

[brokenmusicboxwolfe]

Quick  catch up, including tonight and motel viewing during the trip....

Kong: Skull Island- As the Vietnam war ends an organization ( focused on hunting giant creaturesafter some historical encounters) sets out to a storm shrouded unexplored island with the help of the US military. Bombs get dropped to aide in “mapping” but instead it stirs up trouble. A very familiar pissed off giant ape smashes all the helicopters leaving two groups trying to reach their escape point. One group, containing a mercenary with a heart of gold and an anti-war photo journalist among others, meet up with a fella that’s been stuck on the island since WWII living with mysterious locals. He clues them in that Kong is actually the protector of humans, protecting the world from giant lizard creatures that keep crawling out from beneath the earth. Meanwhile the other group, headed by a military officer with no eagerness for peacetime, are making it their mission to kill Kong. Maybe that’s not such a good idea....

It’s a good old fashioned silly B movie on a blockbuster CGI extravaganza budget, Apocalypse Now with lots of kaiju battles. It’s loads of fun, well if you have any affection for giant monster movies anyway. Or if while watching Platoon you every wanted a giant spider creature to show up.  It’s pretty clearly aiming to kick off a franchise with that kaiju hunting organization, but for once I don’t mind the obviousness of the money grubbing. I enjoyed it’s dumb ol’ self too much! 

Val Lewton: The Man in the Shadows- It’s a solid, straightforward documentary about the creator/creative force behind classic horror films released by RKO (Cat People, I Walked With a Zombie, etc). Since I like the films in question I found it interesting.

Nocturnal Animals- Your standard issue dissatisfied immaculate, cynical artist rich gal gets a manuscript from her ex just as her equally coldly “sophisticated” current hubby is having an affair. The manuscript is the story of a man whose wife and daughter are brutally raped and murdered when the family encounters those psychopathic hicks that upper scale urban folks think are just waitin’ to pounce the second you are out of cell phone range. He sets out to see that the evil crazies responsible pay. This story serves as a hook for the hipper than thou city gal to reflect in her former relationship and get a kind of pay back. Loathesome, unsympathetic people in a hermetically austere privileged world crossed with a nasty and bleak story within a story creating an artfully stylishly filmed and well acted peice of snob crap where I want to smack everyone involved with a really big stick!

An Affair to Remember- Another movie where I want to hit everyone! A couple of charming stars play a couple who fall in love when they meet on a trip, but their romances is complicated by both being engaged to others. Surprise, it turns out their soon to be exes are astoundingly understanding. So how get a problem for the love  birds to face? 

Well, for starters they decide to to see or speak to each other for six months to test their affections, and if they meet at the selected time and place it means twu wuv. She gets hit by a car crossing the street and looses the use of her legs, but idiot girl thinks it’s better her beloved think he was rejected by her rather than know of her condition. 

Apparently being unable to walk is a fate worse than death, or some crap. She was a singer, but apparently being unable to walk means you have to give up singing professionally and instead rely on the charity of a preist to get you a job teaching singing to young children who warble all cutsey at the poor audience. Yes, not being able to walk makes you a thing to be pitied, unable to go spend a night on the town after your still pals ex takes you out to the theater, because apparently you have to walk to eat out or something. Oh, and that nice guy ex is rich and doesn’t just keep encouraging you tell your hurt twu wuv, but also offers to pay for magic cure all surgery. But no, you won’t take the help. You will only get the surgery when you save out of your meager salary, and you will only tell your twu wuv once you can walk.

She is an idiot!!

Well acted, well filmed, and I REALLY got disgusted with this bullshit. It isn’t romantic, but insulting to people who do have ambulatory issues and demonstrates a kind of martyr delusion selfishness on the part of the so called heroine!

Ransom!- The son of a rich business man gets kidnapped. Rather than pay the ransom he declares on tv he will offer up that same amount of money for the kidnappers dead or alive if the child is not returned. Fair enough. 

But he also believes forcably sedating his distraught wife, keeping her locked up in her bedroom under constant supervision in a drugged up haze, refusing to tell her anything about what is happening, and not allowing her any say at all in her decisions about her son’s fate is fair too. So to do the people around him, complying with his manly right to do what the hell he likes about the hysterical wife, never mind the fact she might not be so damned hysterical if she were treated with a bit of respect!

We are not supposed to question this, probably no more than in that (also 1950s) remake of The Man Who Knew To Much when the bastard hero husband forcably drugs his wife before telling her about their son’s kidnapping. It’s just background, expected, a demonstration of how women are these naturally hysterical creatures that the paternalistic society needs to “take care of” by taking away their mental faculties through sedation. 

I sooooo do not want to time travel to the ‘50s!

Experiment in Terror- Ok, I did enjoy this one. I’d also seen it before.

A woman that works in a bank is ambushed by a man in her own home. She never sees his face as he threatens not only her life but the life of her teenage sister if she doesn’t cooperate with his robbery plan. Despite her valid fear she contacts the authorities. While the the FBI attempt to hunt the baddie down, he continues to haunt her. When he abducts the sister it looks like the heroins will be forced to actually do what he wants, despite being smart enough to realize he will probably kill them both anyway....

It really is an excellent thriller. The heroine’s fear never keeps her from being smart, the FBI agent is determined but knows he might fail to protect her, no romance is shoehorned in, and the villian is truly unnerving.  Now they gave the baddie asthma as creepy way to signal his presence, but since my father was asthmatic that wouldn’t be enough to find him disturbing. (Though there was that one time when I was 6 and Pop was coming down the stairs in the dark that for a few moments freaked me out Darth Vader was there...) No, he’s creepy because of the sick pleasure he takes in tormenting his target. This isn’t just about the money for him: he’s having fun. And golly, it’s Ross Martin who played the lovable Artie in one of my fave shows, The Wild Wild West, as the sicko! It’s a one of those movies that if you come across it late night you always remember it, but if you rewatch it years later you aren’t disappointed.

[imagine-loki]

The Black Bunny

TITLE: The Black Bunny

CHAPTER NO./ONE SHOT: Part One AUTHOR: goddessofmischief ORIGINAL IMAGINE: Imagine if Loki accidentally turned himself into a bunny through some sort of magical mishap, and, not being able to properly care for himself, he kind of awkwardly nibbles on things and writes out what happened with the shreddings. 

RATING: T

NOTES: I could not resist writing this short, yet sweet, story, as I thought the idea of Bunny Loki was downright adorable. Full of fluff, and very silly (compared to the more serious fics I write). Also, it’s just in time for Easter! haha ♥︎ It is loosely based off of the imagine above and there will be two parts, hope you enjoy!

Part One

It was a Monday, and I was running late… again. I hurried to the subway, but I had then discovered that I left my metro card at home and by the time I bought another card, the train that I usually took to get me to work on time was long gone. Today was already not my day.

I lived in a tiny apartment all the way downtown, near Battery Park, and it took me awhile to get to my office in Midtown: my office being the one directly besides the infamous Stark Tower - and yes, my words are dripping with sarcasm. 

Ever since the huge attack on New York, which occurred over a year ago, I was not the biggest fan of the Avengers, despite how they actually saved the city from being blown up, and also prevented a psychotic man from reigning over the entire world. It was only my luck that the company in which I worked for was situated right next to a building that would only attract further trouble and mayhem.

I exited the subway at 42nd street and hastily made my way to my office, passing by Bryant Park and impassively regarding the way in which it began to rain. I let out a sigh as I opened up my umbrella, as it was truly turning out to be a terrible day already. But then, I heard something. My ears perked up at a peculiar noise that I could hear above the footsteps and low murmurs of the morning rush hour crowd. I stopped and looked in the direction of the shrubs that surrounded the park, a large man bumping into me as I did so and calling me out on it: “Must you stop in the middle of the sidewalk, little girl?!” On other days, I would have turned around and not let him get away with ridiculing me, especially in regards to my size, for I had enough of that at work. But my attention was already fixated on the soft whimpers that were emitting from a nearby rose bush that could only be accessed from within the park. I changed my route completely and headed to the nearest stairs that entered into the park, and retraced the distance I had gone to find the approximate bush where I had heard the heart wrenching noises of an animal that was either all alone and frightened in the big city, or injured.

I clicked my tongue lightly and kneeled onto the ground. “Won’t you come out?” I then reached into my bag and took out a container of spinach and other greens, as well as carrots, that I intended to have for lunch. I looked over my shoulder and saw that I caught the attention of various passerby’s, who wore bewildered expressions on their faces. I doubted that they never before witnessed a young girl, kneeling on the muddy ground, talking and holding out a piece of spinach to nobody in particular, on their daily morning commute. But then again, it was New York, and perhaps it had happened before.

But as I was looking away, a small black bunny had come out of the rosebush and hopped over, greedily eating the spinach out of my hands. It wasn’t until I heard the soft sounds of the animal chewing that I turned back around. “Oh, hello there, little fella.” I said with a smile. The black bunny’s bright green eyes blinked and he tilted his head slightly, observing me closely. “Would you like some more? I have carrots too.” To this statement, the bunny nodded. I thought this was rather strange, for it seemed like the bunny had fully understood my words. Instead, I pondered over whether it was a wild rabbit, but this was highly unlikely for Bryant Park. Central Park, on the other hand, was a more plausible source of small, wild animals. It must have gotten away from it’s previous owner and was now all alone in a big city. Poor thing. I fed it more spinach, and some carrots, as it hopped closer to me and sat under my umbrella. Then, unexpectedly, it hopped up into my lap and settled comfortably on top of it. “Oh, b-but you see… I must be going. I have to go to work. I’m already late.” I said. It gazed up at me with a saddened expression that tugged at my heart. Why did I have to be such an animal lover? I sighed and patted the bunny’s head affectionately. “I guess I can call out sick… again.” It then purred in response to my words, and I again had the strange sensation that it fully comprehended what I was saying.

I pulled out my phone and dialed my office, only to be met with a panicky HR woman on the other side of the receiver. I told her that I wouldn’t be able to make it in, but she immediately said that I was the only smart one for not doing so. She urged me to stay home. “Why? I asked, perplexed at her urgency. “They have just announced that the entire city is on lockdown.” She said briskly, hanging up before I could question her more. Strangely enough, right after she said this, deafening alarms began to sound throughout the streets and everyone was now running throughout them, trying to get away from the impending danger - whatever that might be. I picked up the bunny in my arms and hurried back to the subway station, which, to my good fortune, was still running. I just hoped that it wouldn’t break down midway towards my journey back to the southern tip of the city. I was able to catch an express train to South Ferry Station.  I wrapped the bunny underneath my wool coat and held it close to my chest as the subway continued its journey downtown. With a sigh of relief, I got out of the station and hastened to my apartment. Once inside, I set the black bunny down onto the floor and ran to my TV to put on the news. I immediately sat down as a sense of dread overwhelmed me. On the screen was a large picture of a man, smiling wickedly, with silky, raven black hair, a golden horned helmet and otherworldly armor. In his hand was a large glowing scepter. It must have been one of the pictures that had been taken of him in the midst of the battle that he had ensued on New York over a year ago, for a few members of his alien army could be seen behind him, and the entire street was destroyed and filled with rubble. Below his picture read: Loki Laufeyson has escaped from Stark Tower. New York City is now on a citywide lockdown.

I felt something nudging my feet, and I looked down at the curious black bunny. “Well it looks like we may be stuck in this apartment for quite some time, little fella. It’s a good thing I went grocery shopping yesterday - and that I especially stocked up on lettuce, fruits and vegetables for you.” I giggled, even though I was still frightened by the thought of having that madman on the loose again. “I hope we will both be safe.” I whispered as I picked the bunny up and placed it back onto my lap. I had thought that bunnies didn’t like to be touched, but this one didn’t seem to mind. “I should name you! But I am not entirely sure of your gender. You seem to be a male…” I scratched behind its large ears as it studied me, and then I noticed that it was faintly nodding again. “Wait, do you understand me?” It, he, nodded again. I gasped. “Oh my goodness. Well, I guess your previous owner somehow trained you to understand the human language.” After I said this however, I furrowed my brows and bit my lip at how bizarre this actually seemed, but I soon thought nothing more of it. “But back to your name. I think I shall name you… Cornelius. A scholarly name for an intelligent little bunny. What do you think?” The bunny nodded with approval and then jumped playfully into my arms. I chuckled as I cradled him and rubbed his stomach. “I’ve never had a pet before, but I promise I’ll take good care of you. My name is Emma, by the way.” I confided my name to him, solely because of how clever he appeared to be, and that I was glad to have a pet around.

It had continued to rain for the rest of the day, and I was extremely grateful that one of my neighbors down the hall, who owned many different pets, kindly lent me a litter box and hay. She had also given me some advice in regards to caring for rabbits.

“You see, Cornelius, I don’t really have the best of luck with making friends.” I admitted to my new pet while I tucked myself under my floral duvet. I had taken it upon myself to unfold to the bunny all of my troubles, especially those in regards to work. Cornelius seemed attentive, which only served to encourage me to divulge more things about myself. “People find me rather, uh, peculiar. But, I guess I am.” I let out a drowsy laugh. It was already dark outside and I was quite exhausted, so I shut off the lights and said goodnight to the bunny. I wished for nothing more than to fall asleep to the gentle raindrops hitting my windows, but I found that I was restless since the sirens would occasionally come back on in full force. “Ughhh.” I groaned, without opening my eyes. “Curse the Avengers for disrupting my sleep!” I then realized that there was a weight on my neck and chest, that had not been there when I had initially dozed off. I opened my eyes and met the green eyes of Cornelius, which seemed to be the brightest entity of the dimly lit room. He wiggled his nose at me adorably. “Oh, hey, Cornelius.” The bunny answered me with humming noise and began to nibble my neck. I giggled wildly, as this, and his whiskers, delicately tickled my neck. I cuddled him more closely and rubbed his ears. “If only these sirens would stop.” I murmured, as I closed my eyes and desperately tried to drift off to sleep again. “Do you know your ears feel like velvet, little fella?” I whispered, practically asleep.

❧

When I awoke the next morning, I turned on the television in my room and found that the city was still on lockdown. They showed video footage of the Avengers searching through deserted, yet undisturbed, streets. It seemed that no battles had erupted overnight, which made me relieved. So instead, I became concerned about another matter: Cornelius was no longer on my bed, nor in my bedroom. “Cornelius, where have you gone?” I called out, not leaving my bed just yet. Then, rather unexpectedly, the black bunny jumped up into my bed and began hopping wildly about. “You seem quite happy this morning, little fella. What exactly have you been up to?” He came closer and settled down in front of me. He seemed eager about something, and looked in the direction of the door. “I hope you haven’t made a mess out there.” The bunny replied by wiggling its nose before jumping back off my bed and hurrying outside. I followed the small animal uneasily, for I was unsure of what type of trouble I would find. What I did find caused me to gasp loudly. Scattered about my kitchen floor was all bits of yesterday’s Times, which had been carefully laid out to read: “MORNING, EM” “What in the world…?” I whispered in awe, before turning to the bunny who sat besides his creation rather proudly. I raised a brow quizzically. “Who exactly was your past owner?”

After breakfast, and after I assembled the shreds of paper into a small pile so Cornelius would be able to reuse them, I became incredibly bored. Cornelius sat on my lap as we watched the news, only to hear the same story over and over again: Loki Laufeyson was still on the loose and that it was still unsafe to venture outside. They continuously would either show images of city streets with policemen scattered about, helicopter footage from above the city, or various images of the criminal himself, which made me cringe. “Any suggestions to what we could do, little fella?” I turned to the observant bunny at my side. He nodded before bouncing off into my bedroom. I ran to follow him, but he had disappeared from my sight completely.”Do you want to play hide and seek?” I perceived a low purring from below and found that Cornelius had sprung into a chest, which was filled with small teddy bear outfits that belonged to my older brother’s 4 year old daughter Margaret. I kept them here for when she came to visit me, which was regularly. “Oh, would you like to play dress up then?” Cornelius answered this by digging deeper into the chest and pulling out on costume in particular: a mini sailor uniform. “Guess you’d like to start off with that one, huh?” Cornelius nodded quite vigorously and I chuckled at how this situation was becoming even more bizarre.

I proceeded to dress up Cornelius in different costumes, such as a doctor, policeman, firefighter and even a tuxedo Mickey Mouse costume (which he especially liked). The bunny, however, would not touch the Captain America nor Hulk costume that was mixed into the bin and every time I held them up to try to persuade him, Cornelius would growl at me. I hadn’t even been sure that rabbits could make such sounds of disapproval… “Alright, alright. I guess we both aren’t overly fond of the Avengers.”

He ended up wanting to try on most of the outfits in the bin, and each time he had on a new costume, I would take a picture with my phone. And the weird thing was that Cornelius would seem to pose for me. Given that I had nothing better to do, as I was confined to my apartment, I actually relished in this childish activity. Once we were done, the small bunny insisted on keeping a green ribbon, from one of the costumes, tied into a bow around his neck. I had over thirty pictures of Cornelius now and looked through them while exclaiming how adorable he looked. An appealing idea came to mind, and I laughed out loud over how silly it was for a woman at age twenty-one to even concoct such a thought. “Oh, Cornelius,” I said in between laughing. “I think you’re going to be Insta-famous!”