#THIS IS SO PRETTY i am going to explode
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does sae call you 'pretty girl' ?
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOKAY . OKAY . okay . so you hate me so you just straight up fucking despise me i see how it is I SEEEE HOW IT ISSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

ok so since he's THE worst fucking guy ever he's the devil he's sick in the head he knows praise is like crack to me aand because he doesn't do that a lot he does not know how to say things properly . he always does it when i expect it the least aaaaaand it always fucking kills me yayy why can't you just praise me like a normal person why are you doing it when you're like three knuckles deep you piece of shit HE'S THE WOOOOOOOOOORSSTTTTTTTTTTT
no srsly he knows i need the praise he says smth that's almost . a compliment and i'm gonna be staring at him with big wet eyes like oookay pack it up it's so embarrassing i need to kill this guy😒😒😒😒😒😒😒😒😒
#MY NEMESIS .#MY WORST NIGHTMAREEEEEEE#need praise like i need air and . he's the way he is#it's so over#bc he doesn't do it a lot it's like double crack#I HATE ITTTTTTTTTTTT#why couldn't he just go oooh babe you look so prettyyy wow i love you#why does he only go cmon pretty girl don't tell me it's too much already#FUCK YOUUUUUUUUUUUU#NSVEKDHDKKDHDKKWJKFKDNVFKWLVDKNDKFLDVGGFBKS#WHYYYYWOULD YOU PUT THIS IMAGE IN MY HEAD THIS GOD AWFUL THOUGHT AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA#exploded#i hate him sm#i am biting your fingers amira you are . evil#PUT ME OUT OF MY MISERYYYYYYUYUYUYYYY#amira <3#friends!!#misae
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my mom got me Monster Hunter Wilds as a gift for being almost done my Yue/Skye backerkit project order fulfillment 🥺🩷
and the most shocking part of it all is that it runs pretty smoothly on medium graphics settings on my outdated gaming laptop? 😭🩷 who would've thought (certainly not I! 😭😭)
#i got it on 120 fps now too like#i thought my laptop would explode but the fans not even going that hard like its just running it pretty well!#i thought i'd have issues running it on the lowest settings with 30 fps lol#so i am extremely pleasantly surprised!#strawbunnycake ramblings#non art#monster hunter#mhw#mhwilds#monster hunter wilds
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flatmate brought home a late dinner for me to nibble on SHE IS THE BESTEST EVER!!!!! ^o^ today’s little treat is half of a curried chicken sandwich (i think there are apricots in it!!!!!!!!) and taro bbt….. Nyam 😋👐
#coucou coco!#sharing a bite with you all OF COURSE… say aaaaa >:O 🥄#(and sip 🧋 :3 slurp slurp)#i hope everyone’s gotten their tasty little treat of the day toooo!!! (☆▽☆)#i am going to my first very big academic conference next week akshskjs i am so!!!!!!!! 🌀 . 🌀 excited and nervous all at once but!!#i think it will be fun with my labmates there >v< I AM MAKING THE GRAPHS ON MY POSTER TABICO COLOURS WAH… 💜💛 actually it looks very pretty!#we will knock out this poster super fast… SINCE WE NEED TO REREAD VANA’S KARASU FIC AGAIN BEFORE WE SWITCH TO STUDYING 😠 /cat exploding gif#SUSTENANCEEEEE
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WE ARE VISIBLE TODAY!!
#ouuuggh my husband. he's so fun to draw#I am going to explode he's so pretty#also buff yamato i would love to be hugged by you 🥰#one piece yamato#yamato one piece#one piece#trans visibility#AudrinArt#YIPPEE!!!
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sneepy cozy time....
#cats#longing to one day hopefully feel sleepy cozy like this again...#There was a pretty cool week here so I thought we had progressed closer to cool fall weather but... NO#..wrong!! It's like 80F in my room right now and was 98F outside yesterday. We get two more 'cooler' days and then#it starts going up again and will be in the high 90s possibly 100 something later this week#in my mind september should be COOOOOLLLL!!!!! or at least STARTING to get there.. Like mid 80s at the highest.#I am going to explode the world with evil wizard powers aaRGHaaHHHHHHHH#OR at least it should get down really low at night. I think thats the main thing is if it's 95 in the day and only 62 for like 3 hours in#the middle of the night then even leaving a fan in windows all night is not enough to fully cool down the house because its just not#enough cold air or cool for long enough. If it were 98 in the day but 15F outside at night then you could probably bring cool air inside al#night and your house would be at a relatively low starting point for the next days heat.#Like for example - in my apartment on a hot and sunny day. Even with every window#closed and blocked off with thick layers of reflective stuff and also not using the stove or doing anything to generate heat - the apartmen#will still go up on average about 6 - 8 degrees in one day. Peaking around 8 - 10pm night time. If I start off with the house cooled down#to 60F. then the highest it would get is 66 - 68 which is tolerable#.But if the lowest I can cool the apartment all night is still only 75F#then it's going to be 81 - 83F by the end of the day. So really it would be bearable (ISH)#for it to be warm as long as it was colder at night.#Though still the IDEAL is to not have to structure my life around envrionmental management and constantly be checking the#outdoor temperature so I can put the fans in the second that it's colder outside than it is inside and putting elaborate curtain systems#up and down at the exact right times and meal prepping 4 days in advance so I dont have to use the stove for 3 days and blah blah blah#Life in the colder weather months is so effortless and breezy in that sense. I can just have the window open all day and get natural light.#I can cook whatever I want. I can wear what I like. I can move around the house freely without needing to always#carry a fan around with me or douse myself in water.#ANYWAY.... oh if only that were me.... snuggled in a warm blanket ... a comforting wintery image...
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AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA EVERYONE SHUT UP AND LOOK AT THEM
#WWUUHAUGRHWJA I'M GONNA CRY SOMEBODY HUG THEM#ough. What is going to happen to them. I am exploding from curiosity#It's been so long since i've actually read !!-era mainsto#enstars#ensemble stars#hiiro amagi#rinne amagi#THE CARDS LOOK SO PRETTY#I hope they get to be happy
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teacher, teacher
#art#my art#artists on tumblr#digital art#oc#pink space#eyestrain#HEYYYYY#this took me MUCH longer than i thought it would but i finishedddd ehehehhehehe :DDD#i am pretty happy with it!! the effects were killing me but i prevaaaailllll hgbfsh :33#/i DO have a timelapse of this canvas i think i'm gonna put it up so !!#/decided to make the little magic stringy thing more transparent bc it is not the focus here. be not afraid hfbvhs#//anyway i have so many thoughts and i'm going to go explode forever ehehghehegh#i NEED to work on this comic. or i may just die lmao <3#so BYE i may return. perhaps :3
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i think i need to jerk off before i go to the easter vigil mass so i can survive through it without going insane
#personal#on thursday the priest sang the psalms and he has such a pretty voice i almost died#i mean he has a pretty voice overall but his singing voice is so good i love him#every time he sings the eucharistic prayer i just hhhhhhhhhh#leaves a wet stain on the pew oopsie#i am literally so feral for him on thursday i felt like i was going to explode if he didn't fuck me right that second
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oh god my queue actually ran all the way out?? what the hell
#I have not been online much at allllll the past like. 2 weeks#somehow despite irl work being dead as fuck rn I still managed to end up with 1 bazillion things that needed Doing and Going To#I am driving myself insane. everything is exploding#I think I've finally got myself back into a manageable state for the most part but unfortunately my unplanned and unwanted hiatus means I'm#pretty behind on stuff now. crying sobbing throwing up etc#I neeeeed to clear my queue and start taking on more comms but I think I'm also falling into burnout something fierce rn#I need to draw my own characters again so bad but I've got to get the comm work out of the way first. head in my hands#it's not even like it's a totally crazy amount of stuff left to do. I really shouldn't be this out of it#uuugggghhhhhhh#can't promise y'all will see me around much this week either but I should at least have comm updates out to people soon#SHOOT I forgot to upload this weekend too. fuck. maybe y'all will get a midweek upload maybe not idk#I do have a good backlog to post at least#storm speaking
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I'm crashing tf out grandson
#luka.txt#vent#stuck between feeling guilty and annoying when I vent#and needing to vent so bad I feel like I'm gonna explode#like agh I don't want to be this gloomy inconvenience but also just keeping things to myself is agonizing#idk I'm more introverted and awkward but I do genuinely enjoy talking to people#and circling back to just feeling very lonely#but I'm so fucking sad all the time and just so reserved from past issues I don't feel like an interesting person#and I can't talk to people abt my struggles with this because it just feels like I'm guilt tripping them into being comforting and friendly#so I'm just alone and dying because I would rather suffer than even potentially bother someone#idk my fucking mood has been fluctuating like crazy but last couple days/week have been pretty bad#when the bipolar disorder makes you bipolar#how much are meds supposed to help because this shit feels impossible like when I'm entering a depressive episode everything is so bad#prob doesn't help that I'm having to attend therapy less frequently and also have postponed my med check twice now#I'm ngl part of it's because I don't wanna go like it does not feel like a judgement free space#idk how to explain it really but like I think a part of why I struggle to open up is fear of being judged#and it's just the way she talks and questions me idk it makes me uncomfortable even though I know breaking down these walls is going to#so maybe she's just doing her job idk#I lost the plot but I'm tired of talking so that's it for now#I'm curious if anyone actually ever reads these or if they just get swept through the void#idk which I'd prefer#I am so caught up in how I am percieved I cannot experience the joys of living 🥲#I hate it!! make it stop!!#my therapist has been trying to get me to be more understanding and gentle w/ these parts though#it is very hard because I'm just frustrated and sad but I'm trying#it's so easy to despise though because like I just want to be normal and happy why is this so hard#urgh I have to stop talking I'm gonna die#I haven't been that active lately due to this and a multitude of other things so uh idk when I'll be back again#I'll try to do less vent posts sorgy
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Guys where can I get a pretty boy like this one? I want one
#P1HARMONY WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME THIS COMEBACK I AM GOIGN TO SCREAM#AND HIS ILITTLE UGHGHGHGH SMILE JESUS CFUCKIGN CHRIST INTAK WE GET IT?!?!?#hes so pretty and he knows it!??!? mannnnbfhfgf Im going to explode
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Can I send a dare? No? Okay. For the next five asks you have to wear a maid dress.
But why a maid dress..?
#anon#ooc: I am NOT going to give her a 2 inch skirt with fishnets if that's what you were thinking#maid dresses like this are genuinely so pretty I need whoever sexualized them to explode#white lily cookie#crk ask blog#crk rp blog#cookie run kingdom#cookie run rp#OOC: OH MY GOD I FORGOT TO DRAW HER BANDAGES
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oh god. oh god. oh.. oh gosh. I didn't expect this so soon. I didn't expect this today, I've been busy with life related things so the HYV calendar is really unbeknownst to me, is this update really next week already?? where can I rant about this- whERe can I rant about this-
oh. I made a blog for that exact purpose ! OKAY—!
fuck. fuck me, dude holy-
FUCK.
the slightly worried look on Arle's face as Snezhevna is reaching out her hand, only for her face to seemingly revert back to cold and neutral once the camera actually focuses in on her. Her tone is cold but her words are reassuring,,,,,,,,
ALSO GOD FUCKING DAMN IT. HOW GENTLY SHE HOLDS HER HAND.
the d o o r. the DOOR. THE FUCKING DOOR, CHAT. the slow opening at first, and once you can make out that it's certainly Arle's silhouette she shoves it fully open - both doors, both hands. incredibly attractive—. the FEAR in that man's eyes.
The crossed hands. We can't see her face but you know what expression she's making (it's not really an expression. it's neutral but you can feel it). THE FUCKING F E A R ON THAT MAN'S FACE.
Oh- she literally just grabbed him by the throat. Just like that- ! There's the expression. Oh, you feel it, alright. If you go frame by frame, you'll notice her eyes narrow in the slightest right before ->
POV: you're getting chocked out by Arlecchino, and that's actually the least of your worries. (my god she is beautiful).
I did not expect him to simply be thrown down to the ground and I ... d i d not expect her to step on his FACE. [insert gay masochistic joke here. you know the one]. Did not expect her to smile (this is the ONLY scene wherein we see her smile even slightly... huh...) *And the reason I say "I did not expect her to smile", is because with the momentum we were getting I thought she was straight up going to crush his throat, or stab him (hand, weapon or otherwise). It looked like she was digging the forefoot of her shoe into the guys head and not the... .. y'know deadly fucking heel, so that.. confused me. (and the sound when she supposedly stomped his head in did NOT sound all that impactful) but ANYWAYS I digress-
I'm of course assuming more happened after the cut to black because . madam where did you get that bloodstain on you—
BLOODSTAIN ON HER FACE!?!?!? (more on this in a second)
Freminet??? Freminet feature ! (not Lyney or Lynette.. interesting). :(((( the poor boy sounds so,, desensitized. His father
holy shit quick intermission. After the mental chronological fuckfest that was "The Song Burning in the Embers" I don't think I can look at Arle and the HotH the same anymore because she's.. she's like not even 10 years older than them (?) it's insane this doesn't make any sense- ANYWAYS.
HIS FATHER comes back with what we later see to be real blood on her face. Tells him "I've acquired new funds". We know what that means... HE knows what that means!!, and the way WE - THE AUDIENCE - know that Freminet knows what it means is because the boy replies "Oh.. Okay.."
LIKE-! chat omg this is truly just routine for them,,,, Like out of the 3 siblings, Freminet always gave off the biggest child assassin vibe, but wow. To see that routine and desensitized nature of the HotH's line of work just,, splayed out in a Character Trailer is . wow. and the look in his eyes as he says it is- wow.
YEAH UHH BLOODSTAIN ON HER FACE??/ The lighting in this scene now is evidently less saturated. And it's just- oh my FUCKING GOD it does so many things:
the blood on Arle's face looks... dry. it doesn't look as fresh as you may expect which could mean many things. It could mean she spent,,, hella long in there with that guy doing what needed to be done. It could mean she took care of something else immediately after dealing with that guy (perhaps smth related to the children Snezhevna wanted to save). But regardless, it means she didn't put in the effort to clean her face and hide what happened. OBVIOUSLY !!! that is so . obviously her style but to S E E IT IN MY GENSHIN IMPACT CHARACTER TRAILER it's- oh my god
it serves to highlight the really, truly, bleak nature of the scene now that we know plain and simple Arlecchino just killed a man. There's no subtext, there's no reading between the lines. The only thing that didn't happen is that we didn't see contact nor see a body. But, no sugarcoating, Arlecchino killed a man. No one is hiding it. You are not surprised. No one should be but damn.
and ofc it acts as a representation of Snezhevna dying...
because it seems like the saturation is back once the camera switches to looking at Snezhevna laying in bed.
And is it me, or does it look like Arle's allowing herself to actually display a tinge of worry in her expression this time? And also, EVER so slightly in her tone as well. You can feel it, it's gentler.
"Once I'm better I'll start my next mission.."
THIS. THIS!! IN SO MANY WAYS THIS!
OKAY. so bear with me. I haven't actually read any of the sibling's character stories yet, so there could be a LOT of info I'm missing but:
There's still a pretty thought-provoking conversation going on (in MY mind, at least) about just how intensely these children are being trained to be soldiers for the Fatui. They're obviously in an environment that indoctrinates them into being soldiers of SOME kind, but I still don't know what kind of soldier that's supposed to be. Are they all ALWAYS extensions of the Fatui? Or are they more-so extensions of Arlecchino specifically..? Snezhevna was obviously trying to help those children she came across, and I'm assuming that happened on her latest mission, so was the mission for a charitable cause?? What was her next mission supposed to be?? Same line of work? Saving people? Or would it switch up and was she going to be sent to "take care of" (kill .) someone???
So I don't know whether to interpret that line as a hint of them being overworked and 1) feeling like they need to continue their work out of pure fear that they'll be deemed ineffective and useless... or 2) feeling like they need to continue their work out of a sense of loyalty and duty to the place that took them in and raised them. Or both..
and ofc the funeral scene. I can't say much more than what's already shown right on the screen.
and am I bugging? Or is the location of the grave....
#LONG post#first of all. I am kissing Genshin Impact's (HoYovere's entire) artstyle on the mouth.#second of all#Erin Yvette#oh my god Erin Yvette.#the 'My child...' line.. what if I literally blow up the world I'm going to explode#Arlecchino is drop dead gorgeous in this. That's a given but what kind of gay person would I be if I didn't say it anyway#it's always a given with their trailers. A l w a y s.#she's so drop dead handsome oh my god I fucking hate gender#blazingramble#holy shit new tag wtf#I try not to do these on here often but...#meh. my blog#I needed a place to write it down and I'm honestly getting self-conscious abt using my discord server#I say the kids at the HotH are desensitized 'cause like.. it's FUCKING IMPOSSIBLE that they DON'T know!!!!#they can ACT like they don't !!! sure! repression is very real and these kids are exposed to a LOT of trauma. Yes#but they are NOT FUCKING IGNORANT about it#the older ones at least; of course the younger they are the more likely they're sheltered from the Fatui's violent practices#like Lyney Lynette Freminet and other kids their age are child assassins. Now I'm PRETTY FUCKIN CONFIDENT they've killed people#like it wasn't hard to believe before but (and remember I haven't read their character stories) before it was mostly believable conjecture#I can't get over the scene where she returns to the bed#Arlecchino#genshin impact#genshin#genshin arlecchino#the knave#Genshin the knave#blazingshitpost genshin edition#blazingshitpost#Youtube
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Mark my words, the next country/area we're getting in Infinity Nikki is Cicia.
#theres just too many quests and npcs connected to cicia for it not to be foreshadowing#plus umbreto the other oft mentioned country we've seen is currently in a war with refugees dispersing to wishfield (and maybe other places)#while the nikki series doesnt shy away from war i doubt we'll go there during active fighting without a good reason#and right now theres way more reasons to go to cicia than umbreto#but then again im not really finished with the main quest here in wishfield as i am against the wall that is sovereign battles#well more like all the factions under them#why are the piecey and faewish sprites so hard- my resources to glow up are dwindling fast#as much as i hate gacha mechanics these ones do seem pretty generous when you do pull#i like some of the lower tier pieces better than some of the higher tier ones too so im not too disappointed when i dont pull a 4 or 5 star#as a free to play person im finding i can usually full pull one of the two limited banners and get some of the pieces from the 2nd banner#but yeah incredibly fun game and despite there being a ton of beautiful textures and lighting my computer is taking it well#of course im playing on desktop im sure my phone would explode and my laptop run hotter than the sun#infinity nikki
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.
#tw vent#I am so. so tired#this week hit me like a freight train#I have final coursework to hand in in less than a week and I'm stressing because I was most definitely not given enough time to do it#and everything inside me is telling me I'm going to fail and I'm pretty sure my teachers think so as well#all my friends are high achievers who always get high grades and put their soul into their work and then there's me. Constantly failing#I try so hard but no matter what I do I never make any progress and I'm afraid I'm going to be stuck here#and that eventually my friends will move on academically and maybe socially and I'll be left behind and feel like a scared kid again#I can't go outside for a walk to try and calm myself down because I fucked up my ankle#so I'm sat here in my room surrounded by work I can't seem to even escape for a second#I just wanna explode#I'm getting to the point where I'm just being unproductive because all I do is sit in bed and rot#and if I'm not doing that I'm at work or at school#and of course I can't even sleep. I can't even rest for a moment#this is shit man#so utterly shit#mel's thoughts
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she’s so fucking beautiful everytime i see her i scream and cry internally i feel like stabbing myself in the eyes why can’t i be as beautiful as her?????????? why does god have favourites????????? why not me???????????????? WHY????????????????
#girlblogger#girlblogging#girlhood#hell is a teenage girl#im just a girl#natalie portman#black swan#nina sayers#jealousy issues#jealousy#whyyyy#why am i like this#why#why me#like why#how is she so beautiful#how is she real#how is she so pretty#why not me#im gonna k word myself#im going insane#im going to kms#im going to explode#screaming crying throwing up#gaslight gatekeep girlboss#i should kms#might kms
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