#THIS IS SO LATE BUT I CAN'T WAIT ANYMORE
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𝕒𝕝𝕝 𝕚𝕥 𝕥𝕒𝕜𝕖𝕤 𝕚𝕤 𝕒 𝕜𝕚𝕤𝕤
#the sims 4#ts4#sims 4#ts4 edit#ts4 render#simblr#aliya's sims#naiyana#antonio#amongussy#theseus 08085#being a menace and posting this while salem is asleep#THIS IS SO LATE BUT I CAN'T WAIT ANYMORE#excuse me while i cry over them publicly#i've been crying over them privately the past two weeks#salem and i just making our npcs fall in love nbd#FUN LOVING BOUNTY HUNTER GIRL AND HER CUTE WILD TALL ALIEN BOY
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Does anyone here draw in both desktop & mobile? I'm planning to get a galaxy tab at some point and since I don't really have any experience drawing on a (mobile) tablet, I'm curious abt how it feels to draw on one vs. drawing on pc w/ a graphic tablet 🤔
#once I have all my commission slots filled up that's when i'll buy one#i've been hesitating bc i'm not used to spending a big amt for something but honestly it's more of an investment than a simple want#my poor 10 year old laptop + monitor + keyboard setup is the 'pc' im currently using#both the laptop screen & keyboard isn't working properly anymore so i have a separate monitor + keyboard for it#it's pretty laggy most of the time#not sure how it's still holding up#ngl sometimes i'm worried it'll just give up on me & break at any moment#so I kinda wanna have a backup device#anyways! I get easily tired drawing on pc for some reason#I think it's bc i unconsciously tense my neck? whenever i stare at the monitor for too long#also my eyes hurt + the extreme hot weather lately is making me dizzy so i can't work for long periods of time 😔#I see a lot of artists use ipad so i'm guessing drawing on a tab would also feel nice???#also would that get you in the mood to draw more bc you can bring it w/ u anywhere?#i'm hoping to be able to draw more honestly.....#also the timelapse!! csp wont let me record timelapse on my current pc and idk why that is#might be bc im still on win 7#HOPING i could post timelapse vids when i finally have a tab#tbh i want to get one asap (like as in rn) but I want to make sure I have enough budget first so im waiting for my comm slots to be full#bam blabs
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last line tag
tagged by @jesuisici33 @thewolvesof1998 @daffi-990 @jamespearce9-1-1 @lover-of-mine @hippolotamus @disasterbuckdiaz 💖💖
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It’s a good few weeks, and it feels like everyone’s back on track, settling into their lives again, figuring everything out one day at a time. Buck’s happy. He has his awesome girlfriend, his best friend seems finally more at ease, even if the divorce is adding some stress, and his other best friend is happier than ever with his mom around. Everything’s finally starting to go great.
And then it all gets disrupted again.
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no pressure tags: @elvensorceress @gaydiaz @diazass @thebravebitch @silentxxsoul @shortsighted-owl @eddiebabygirldiaz @arthursdent @diazblunt @911onabc @spagheddiediaz @housewifebuck @gayhoediaz @rogerzsteven @watchyourbuck @monsterrae1 @honestlydarkprincess @underwater-ninja-13 @eowon @exhuastedpigeon @weewootruck @loserdiaz @evanbegins @steadfastsaturnsrings @ladydorian05 @malewifediaz @pirrusstuff @theotherbuckley @911-on-abc @spotsandsocks @hoodie-buck @giddyupbuck @wildlife4life @fortheloveofbuddie @nmcggg @diazpatcher @jeeyuns
#the alive shannon fic#last line tag#buddie wip#buddie fic#wikiangela writes#my writing#fic snippet#clearly struggling to segue into the bombing lmao#my wips#skipped wip wednesday so have a lil line haha#thought id have the bombing written already but need to start getting ready for work so i guess writing's done for today lmao#i might be a little absent from the writing games in the next few weeks bc im just so exhausted lately lol#this scene I'm writing is so disjointed and out of order rn and i hate it i need to find more time to write it properly haha#but pls keep tagging me i love reading y'alls wonderful snippets!!#also what do we think shannon's job could be bc im trying to figure it out and have no clue lol#(also i have to actively remind myself of ali's existence and i can't wait until the break up so i don't have to anymore lmao)
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So idk if I can really articulate the way I'm feeling rn to translate it perfectly, but I want you guys to know how much I truly appreciate everyone who's followed me over the years, who has interacted with me in any way no matter how small, and anyone who has shown up recently. From the bottom of my heart, thank you. It's probably cheesy to say but everyone here has made my life so much brighter and I feel so unbelievably blessed to have been invited into your lives in some way, even if it's just as someone who sometimes shows up on your dash.
I decided to scroll through my tag on here and the way people have supported me over the years though everything really, deeply touched my heart this evening. The people who have drawn fanart for me, the people who have commissioned me, the people who have tagged me in things (I cringe every time bc I feel soooo bad for not seeing them until I look in my tag once in a blue moon, but know I appreciate you trying to include me), the people who tag me when asked who their art inspirations or favorite blogs are (!!!!!!!!!??????), the people who post their art saying that my art inspired them in some way, people who express their excitement when they realize I've followed them (this will never stop being wild to me, what an incredible thing!!!! I'm just me!) everyone. It's absolutely mind boggling to me and I can't stress enough how much it means.
I've had such an incredible time on this site so far and met some of my closest friends here and just.. wow. Thank you so much to all of you, from the very bottom of my heart. I cannot thank you enough for all of your support!! Every little bit of interaction is a blessing to me and I've run out of ways to express that so I'll wrap this up here but yeah!! I hope you all have a lovely evening or whatever time of day it is in your time zone. Know that you've impacted me in a way I can't express and try to give yourselves a little grace, you'll never know how much you've improved the lives of the people around you by just spending a little time in their space ♥
#i wanted to tag a bunch of my friends bc i saw a lot of people i don't interact with much anymore bc of my reclusiveness in recent years#but i was terrified of accidentally leaving people out so if you're wondering if i'm thinking about you then you're exactly who i mean#love love love love love I'm so incredibly fortunate and i can't forget that!!!!#the fact that i've been on here since 2014 and have only received one mean ask that i can think of is insane#i know i've been a bit of a downer lately but overall my hope is that i've created a positive space where people can be happy and feel safe#in some way in any way#and i hope i feel like someone people can talk to (or at.. i know im bad at replying but i do like to read sjkdlfsd)#i've been told that i may come off as intimidating but i truly don't want to be i want people to feel comfortable interacting ^^#ANYWAY gotta go to bed this is embarrassing thanks for listening byeee#dl#not art#i forgot to mention this but also people who use my art for their pfps???????? SPEECHLESS#all of the art in the world and you chose mine it makes my heart so full#also just realized i completely forgot to respond to emails today#if you see this and you're waiting on one I'll reply tomorrow but know I've gotten it!
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i was gonna say "i shouldn't have to go to work when my brain feels like a depression slushie" and then i was like "wait but then i'd basically never ever go to work" and i'm actually doubling down on the first part now bc my god how am i supposed to heal my brain from burning out 5 years ago if i can never get an actual break
#//juri speaks#i also at this moment: do not know if i have health insurance anymore / if i will be able to get insurance#if i can't get insurance i will not be able to take classes this fall#if i can't take classes my loan repayments will kick in immediately#i already don't have enough money for anything and i certainly don't have a spare $150 a month for the government#at any rate i need to submit my tuition waiver Soon but i can't until i know if i can get into the second class#so i have to wait for the prof or my advisor to get back to me#all the while a funeral day draws nearer#and then AT work i still feel like my position doesn't need to exist#but i desperately need it to exist because i need the money#and this big mchuge data migration project we were SUPPOSED to have had done in JUNE is being pushed to the absolute last minute#not by us but by the folks in control of the software we're moving to#so we're not going to have any safety margins with the old software#it's going to be GONE and dead and unlicensed while we're trying to learn the new shit#and i'm going to have to deal with the other branch cataloger trying to do everything for us which Won't Help#and i need!!!!!! a break!!!!!!!!!! from everything!!!!!#i need the world to stop and i need to go sit in the desert for like 6 months#instead best i can do is go buy the new taz gn for a little crumb of escape. maybe a little coffee drink while i'm there#even though i've been hitting sugar hard lately and really do not have the funds to buy more clothes if i gain a few more lbs#and can't afford a walking pad/treadmill and don't want to go outside bc it is a billion degrees all day every day rn#uuuuuuuuuuuugggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
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why is tumblr so fucked up on my chromebook-
#rambearling#i mean i know it has to be either stylus or new xkit but idk which-#need a new laptop....... this bitch old-#can't get updates anymore. the screen's fucked. it's slow#my desktop's also getting on in age even with firefox it's pretty slow (though faster than when i was using chrome)-#firefox is better in like every way i think . i like how it has themes they look nice there's a teddie persona 4 one heehee :3#teddie persona 4 my beloved........ the most character ever..........#i wish i had a debit card so i could buy the teddie plush myself i don't wanna have to wait for christmassssssss#i need to squish and cuddle and throw myself-#i feel like all my posts here lately end up being derailed into me talking about persona 4. can you tell it's my favorite video game-#i need......... persona 4 remake......... please atlus please please pelase please pealse pelase pelasde#let yosuke actually be bisexual this time klsdfjfsdjfsdkjsdf-#<- i say that as if he isn't low-key still bisexual. i'm still convinced they didn't change any of his dialogue#except for removing his actual confession. he still sounds so fucking gay-#what do you MEAN yu is good with his hands yosuke please elaborate-#in one of his weekend hangout invites he literally says he's inviting someone else so people don't think you're dating??? like????????#they're not even my favorite ship (teddie and rise my beloveds..........) but yosuke's so funny to me-
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i love how i come back to twst post about how much i hate idia for a few days and then leave again it's such a cycle
#auburn's rambles <3#i think about that time when people were shipping me w him a lot#and i don't think i ever really addressed how bad it made me feel#like i told people to stop yeah but now whenever i see idia i think about how upset and frustrated i was#like it keeps coming BACK i can't get it out of my HEAD#THIS GOT KINDA VENTISH WAIT#idk man it's late i should be asleep but Fuck i cannot stop thinking about how that got so out of hand#my poor lab partner had to deal w me that day LMAO i like. cried in front of her#and i don't know why my brain keeps coming back to it because nobody makes jokes like that anymore#and everyone who did sent me apologies which was so sweet#anyways hello ygys i think i just needed to get this off my chest goodnight#FOR CLARIFICATION I AM OK!!!! i think im just emotional rn and i did not expect to dump a whole ass essay here#muah muah love ygys thank u for being on my side i hope all of your pillows are cold and you have sweet dreams
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the pipeline from I've scrolled through your ig :) to is that guy with the long hair your brother to I can tell you are a taurus person to I feel like you really are wasting your potential in here is a bit wild to me, but leave it to my coworkers to make it happen
#j. talks#and ofc I nearly cried after that because I have been on the edge anyway my shoulders hurt so much that I don't know how I am supposed to#push through to late shifts this weekend. I have been feeling ugh anyway and I don't like being here either but why on earth would you tell#me this. shortly after we had to evacuate the whole center and people kept running in like the insane customers that they are. then the sam#coworker while we were waiting in the rain outside told me how fast I was when I started working there and that I slowed down. okay??#I can't do this anymore. physically and mentally shouting down
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8 Reactions to The Immortal Thor #2
My sleep-deprived, burnt-out, anxiety-addled self didn't immediately burst into tears when I read this. Absolutely not. I have no idea what you're talking about.
I was like "I know it's probably gonna be like Jane or something [don't @ me if she's dead or something in the comics, I don't follow Thor comics mostly], but I want it to be Loki." And then I turned the page and had to put the book down so I could pump my fists in the air and cheer. Have I mentioned lately that Al Ewing is the fucking best?
Listen, I know they're probably planning something that's going to make me upset with them. But the sound I made reading this line was not human.
This isn't really related, but I just realized that by the end of both their debut tenure with The Defenders, both Cloud and Loki end up pretty exclusively using they/them pronouns. It's a pretty interesting progression in Ewing's portrayal of Loki from a storytelling standpoint, and progression of Loki's genderfluid identity from an in-universe character standpoint.
They're so sparkly! Move over, AOA Loki in the void pre-ego death saying 'I have a brother whom I love,' sparkly!, gender-envy!IT Loki asking if I'll trust them as my enemy is my new phone background.
HOHO WHAT??? HELLO, DARLING!!! I spoke too soon-- this is my new phone background.
I...What's happening. I don't know this Loki. Should I know this Loki?
I've decided to be a fool and say this is Loki's convoluted way of protecting Thor. And possibly make him stronger in order to defeat Toranos eventually.
#loki#loki comics#the immortal thor spoilers#the immortal thor#the immortal thor 2#immortal thor spoilers#marvel comics spoilers#al ewing#al ewing comics#i love this comic i can't wait a month for issue 3#i'm sorry this post is so late#i've been writing data analysis for the last seven hours#i cannot see straight anymore so if there are spelling/grammar issues i'm sorry
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just realized 3 people I was mutuals with have unfollowed me and I'm trying not to overthink it lol
#WHAT DID I DO WHAT DID I DO WHAT DID I DOOOOOOOO😭#tbh I know at least one of my other mutuals lately has had issues with tumblr like. force unfollowing them from me lol#so I'd kind of. assume maybe it's that maybe it's accidental? but. 3 of them?#and the selection in question hardly makes it look coincidental....#is there a screenshot of me in the gc? be honest#and like it's fine its not even that bad I didn't even really talk to 2 of them maybe they just got bored of me we hardly interacted#but I'd talked to the 3rd one frequently through asks at least#they answered one of mine just earlier this last week in a really friendly manner LIKE. I THOUGHT WE WERE COOL#HOW LONG HAS THIS EVEN BE GOING ON#I suspect one of them probably unfollowed me in july... I sent them a 💌 for that mutual ask game and they never answered#which would make sense if we weren't mutuals anymore#oh wait oh my god was that about the goddamn “henry creel stans are crazy” post drama. that would be weird. there's no way#but it happened around the same time...#I literally can't live like this would it be insane to send asks to these people and figure out what I did
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DEATH UNTO DAWN ON SPOTIFY 🥹🫶🏼
#🌙.rambles#[ ffxiv. ]#pls. listen. it has the tea ost n the nier collab n sorrow of werlyt n eden.#it has so many osts dear to me uwahh i've been waiting. so long 😭😭#looking at the album properly now that i'm back home from feeding the cats. help one of them even followed me from the#lower ground lvl to. 2nd floor HFLAKSJFLKSD. those cats. r very dear to me :<#back to ffxiv though. not only w ^^ but there's also hearthward.. ishgard my home. oh my god#n then. danshig naadam iirc? the 'a __ air __' around the start. my fav frontlines map hehe. i miss frontlines honestly#oh my god the scions & sinners stuff too 🥺#spotify wrapped w to the edge at the top fr. OH MY GOD THIS MONTH#W KH FINALLY. YK ON SPOTIFY 😭 riku n dearly beloved those osts mean so much to me hehe n then#FFXIV NOW TOO 🥹#so weird listening to these on spotify. this means i can remove a lot of my mp3s now that i downloaded from yt hdkfajsdkfl#i remember yk? IM GNA CRY SO BADLY I REALLY DON'T KNOW WHAT TO SAY ANYMORE#I MISS. EDEN SO BAD IT HURTS. i miss raiding w my friends i miss laughing w them i miss calling n then. clearing. together.#i miss meeting new ppl. n. oh that one silly friend i still rmb those compliments man he made me attached for a bit i can't deny that but#IT'S JUST. FOND FOR ME TO LOOK BACK ON NOW.#n then. with this is just. endless small reminders of what i love in life so much. yk these memories these people these emotions n thoughts#all these stories. fuck. i feel like. a kid again n it's. smth i've missed lately. it soothes me so much n comforts my heart n soul n mind#sweet serenity oh how i missed you. yk that. that certain peace even though the world around me may be. yeah#even if the apocalypse wld come to test us all or smth i know that. the love i just have for. life wld. yk always return.#i'll always keep it close no matter how much it'll fucking hurt.#i love ffxiv so much i really do it just. yeah for the past few years has become one of my homes fr. always gives me comfort#always makes me remember myself again yk? hdflasdjflkd.. i miss emet-selch can you tell one reason why he's. rlly special to me#like bro he's. i mean. i find him. oh god how to put this i find him attractive fuck it but uh. his uhm. form as solus is.. he's#ffxiv shb grandpa simulator jokes for a reason 💀 but my bro i loved you ever since i knew you EMET-SELCH HE'S JUST. SO#SO ANNOYING. FUCK. PROMISES TO KEEP RN JUST MAKES ME EMOTIONAL ALL THE TIME. THE ORCHESTRA MAN#i want to write so much but. my mind is such a mess rn. but it. i feel better. i remember again. it. hdlfajsfkdjf :^) 😭#i. have sm to write. but i just wna cry i'm overwhelmed again but it's bcs i love. ffxiv sm 😭😭 imy n ilysm not just ffxiv but. everything
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#tw depressing stuff#i know i've been silent again for a bit but i appreciate u all and will get to answering asks again soon <3#but ya girl is really struggling lately tbh#i am constantly fatigued and have no energy for basic daily things#even when i wake up after sleeping all night i still have no energy#so i need to get some health tests done to see what's going on but my anxiety#my dumbass brain just can't do anything and now my body is following#and i'm just kinda done with it all tbh#i constantly feel like a failure because i can't do anything i want to#what even is the point anymore#i am just done#i know i have to get over it and just do what needs to be done#but right now i am really really struggling to see how i can find the energy and motivation to do so#when all i wanna do is just wait for the inevitable end
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I'M GETTING MY APPOINTMENTS
#/pos#doctor agreed that the clinic appointment being in july was bs late and we couldn't wait#so she's trying to get me an extra appointment somewhere else sooner#+ she listened to my thoughts about pots and is trying to get me an urgent appointment with a cardiologue#now if only we didn't keep getting roadblocks...#the clinic said that i had to ask my doc to do 100% santé to get reimbursed. and the doc was confused because she literally can't do that#until we have the diagnosis. diagnosis which is exactly what we're trying to get reimbursed#also apparently her note on the paper that the cardiologist is urgent isn't enough. and she needs to call the center for us so i can get it#before march. so now we're waiting for her to get the time to call them. so they can call us. so we can come back with the paper to finally#get the appointment#uuuuuUUGHHHHH#so tired#plus the pots help center I'm gonna visit this week. plus the pots specialist appointment in February. plus i can't even remember and keep#up with anymore. plus the fact that my mother is even thinking of dropping school and getting interned in a hospital for the year to rest#and heal because of how much i can't keep up with taking care of myself anymore. and manage to attend a few hours of class once every three#weeks. + all my work from this year and last year getting deleted from their pcs malfunctioning. meaning that i need to redo everything i#crawled through and manage to do since the beginning of the year. and all my examples from last year being gone for my portfolio#yeah i don't think i can keep up until the end. AND manage to pass this year...#vent#HB rambles#fought against the nurse again during the blood test. and now my arms and back hurts even more#aaaaaaAAAAAA I'M TIRED#wanna finally play mario galaxy again after a whole year of trying and failing to#but it's definitely gonna be another fail today because I'm going back to bed#too exhausted#manage to eat three boiled eggs and a bunch of grapes tho! and drank water! woooo!!
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y'ever feel nostalgic for objectively worse times. why does that happen
#wishtalks#another vent in the tags post yippee#been feeling not amazing lately#what's new! lol#been feeling really sad in a familiar way#like im in 2016 again and im a sad and lost teenager#except im a grown ass adult and its 2024#i wonder if i'll always be doomed to just feel this way#to feel so disconnected by people that say that they care for me#maybe its the anxious attachment talking but I genuinely feel like I can't believe that anything they do is genuine#why is it so much easier to just convince myself that they hate me than it not being personal#the urge to try to communicate and talk about it but I know i'll just make things worse#at least I feel like more comfortable being away from home#mostly because I know when I finish school what's waiting is worse than the isolation i'm experiencing here#what's even the point if home wont even feel like “home” anymore#whats the point if my friends don't care about me when i'm going to be overseas for 80% of the year#i'm literally ventposting on tumblr because I know that nobody ik irl follows me here or at least doesn't check my posts#so ummmm if you know me irl. you dont#anyways i'll be okay. been really busy with school
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I can finally go to bedddddd I've almost finished all my laundry, just got one more load in the dryer. Idec, it can stay there overnight, I'm so tired I feel like I could cry
#idk what has been up w me but it has been impossible for me to stay awake til midnight lately#I'm always out by 11:45#I hate it. I miss being a night owl.#But god I don't care anymore I don't wanna fight it I'm so ready to be under a blanket#just gonna go check on that last load. make sure it's got enough time to fully dry. and I'm gonna be out like a light#omggggg I can't wait
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Maybe a part 2 of the arcane characters saying things they regret, but they're apologizing because I can't live after reading a angst 🫠
Making up with Arcane characters after a bad argument. | Vi, Caitlyn, Jinx, Ekko, Sevika x Gn!Reader
(Previous part)
Fine, fine, here is a happy part two guys. Take it as an apology for the tears and pain I've caused.✨️
Content: Swearing, accusations of cheating, slight angst, making up, fluff, potential spoilers for season 2, established romantic relationships, sfw
Reader has no set pronouns!
((Not proofread))
》VI
She knew that she had fucked up. There was no way to deny or refute it either. And your absence was further proof of that.
You were always there for her, even when things got bad and she became even worse. No matter how much she yelled or drank, you were there afterward to nurture her back to health. It was so unfair of her to expect it still, after all she had said to you. She hated herself. She hated how weak and pathetic she had become. How she can't even stand straight anymore from the alcohol and couldn't win a single game since she had lost you.
And instead of Caitlyn haunting her like she used to, it was only you now. But you were crying every time. Asking her why she hated you so much. Why she couldn't care for you the way you cared for her. Why you were always the second choice despite having been there since the start.
Why, why, why.
Gritting her teeth against the headache, she made her way through the dark, familiar lanes to your small home that you once shared together. She had to talk to you. She really, really had to. Even if it's far too late now after a week of silence in-between the two of you. She had taken the time to reflect and think about everything, especially about your relationship. And it made her realise that nothing in this world was losing you too.
Knocking on your door, she nervously waited as she heard your footsteps quickly approaching her from inside. You opened the door carefully, ironically just how she had taught you, before freezing at the sight of her. She gave you a weak smile, attempting to look calm and friendly, but it still scared you off. "Hey cupca-" You tried slamming the door into her face mid greeting, but her foot was faster to jam itself in the way.
"H-Hey! Wait, please hear me out!" "Fuck off, Vi. I'm not in the mood to hear more of your bullshit. Go back to Caitlyn since I know how badly you want that!" You never cursed, and every word you spoke made her flinch. She, for some reason, didn't expect you to be this mad. But it hurt, and she deserved it. Another thing she underestimated was, unfortunately, your strength since you somehow managed to push her away and shut the door again. "Come on! Please! I... I didn't mean what I said. I just... have been losing my shit ever since what happened. The guilt is killing me, and I know it's not an excuse! You're right, I have to stop this shit! You're right, I need to stop treating your love for granted!"
She didn't know if you were even listening to her anymore, but it didn't stop the tears that burned in her eyes. "I don't give a damn about Caitlyn like that! I never did! It always you for me. You... you cared for me when no one else ever wanted to, and I was such an idiot for not appreciating it more." Her hand slammed against the wood in defeat, her head coming to rest against it as her body trembled. She was so scared of losing you. This can't be the end. "Please. Please just give me another chance to prove myself. I know I'm a fuck up but I swear I'll do better now."
Vi nearly fell right through your house entrance when you opened the door wide with a teary huff. "God, you're such an idiot... get in already before the neighbors complain." You didn't let her reply as you simply dragged her inside and locked the door again. The pitfighter watched you do so with a gentle gaze, one that felt so familiar to you. "... Fine, I'll give you another chance... but no drinking or fighting anymore. Please." You whisper to her, and she nods quickly before engulfing you in a warm hug.
She knows that she isn't fully forgiven yet, but she'll do everything in her power to prove herself worthy of your love again.
》CAITLYN
"You're still up." Caitlyn's voice was calm and gentle now, so different from the stern and cold tone it had before. You ignored her, however, knowing better than to fall for this again. She always got like this when she knew she had screwed up and was trying to crawl back into your good graces. But this time around, you didn't allow it that easily. You refused to speak to her if she hadn't come back to apologize. And yet... you couldn't help but allow yourself at least one sharp dig at her. "And you're late to bed once again. But I suppose Officer Nolan's 'report' was just that interesting, no?" You were perhaps the only person in all auf Pultover that could ever accuse her of something so scandalous as adultery and get away with it.
It certainly would have been amusing if Caitlyn didn't feel so sick at the thought of you believing that.
Sighing, she placed her hat onto a clothing hanger, her jacket following suit. You were facing away from her on the bed, trying to read a book and rest, despite the pain in your heart. It was hard being angry at her when you loved her so deeply. But her insults had struck much deeper than that.
The bed dipped behind you, and soon enough, you felt her strong arms surrounding your body and her nose tickling your cheek. "I'm sorry, my love. I really am. I... have lost my cool, and that was wrong of me." You scoffed at her words, finding them too shallow for the pain she had caused earlier. Yet you struggled to get out of her strong grasp on you. It felt desperate. And you hated the warmth and security that it made you feel. "If that is all you have to say, then you can leave." You hissed out weakly but couldn't find any malice in it. Just heartbreak, that solidified in more tears burning in your eyes. "Because how... how could you ever say that I could betray you? Do you know how that makes me feel? Do you care?"
Caitlyn hummed against the nape of your neck soothingly, a way to acknowledge the plight she had caused you without revealing her own tears. The grief had made her into a monster. A monster that hurt its friends, family, and most importantly, you. It was unforgivable, and yet she wanted to prove herself worthy of you anyway. She wanted to show you that she hadn't changed deep down like everyone claimed. She was still yours.
"... I will find a way to end this war and resolve it peacefully as soon as I can. I swear it to you." She began, her voice low and gentle, as she listened to the sound of your hiccups and sniffling. This wasn't what she wanted. "And I apologize, truly, for what I called you... I know that you are loyal and trustworthy. Much more than I ever could be... I'm still your Caitlyn." The last part was whispered quietly, as she tried everyone in her power to not break down in front of you like this.
She hated what she had become deep down. She knew it was wrong and that her mother must've been turning in her grave at the sight of what she had done. But what she couldn't handle at all was you hating and leaving her.
There was a moment of silence before you turned to face her and immideatly hugged her impossibly close as you cried into her arms. She rubbed your back lovingly, understanding that this was your way of accepting her apology. But forgiveness will still be a long journey she was willing to take.
For now, she'd rest in your embrace thankfully.
》JINX
Deep down, you knew that she didn't mean what she said. She never would do anything to hurt you. Silco's death was just killing her more than anyone could have expected, and it was hard for everyone to deal with. But you just couldn't take the pain and hurt she caused you anymore. You've been there since day one. You were always at her side. You always took care of her when no one else wanted to. And you understood her better than she did herself. But it was ultimately just not enough. Or so you thought.
The young girl that was now dragging you through the lanes reminded you of her too. She didn't speak a word to you, and for some reason, you didn't have it in you to protest against her odd actions either. She somehow seemed to recognize you the second you bumped into her. And that was enough for her to take your hand and lead you to a very familiar hideout. Perhaps it was fate that brought you here again when you needed Jinx the most.
"Hey kid, who's our little guest-?" The rest of the young woman's words died on her tongue, and it left you simply staring at each other. There was a familiar haze in her eyes, one that you often saw when the voices were taking over. She once mentioned that you sometimes became a part of her hallucinations during longer absences, and that reminder alone made your heart ache. You shouldn't have run away that day. But what other choice did you have? She didn't trust you anymore. She didn't think you should be together anymore. Why were you even here?
"S-sorry... I'm just going to leave..." You muttered as your ears rung and that familiar burning in your eyes made your sight blurry. You felt suffocated and somehow also angry, wishing she could just see how much you loved and cared for her. But just as you were turning away to run again, her strong hand was quicker and held you back by your arm. "Wait. Let's just... talk, alright? Like we always do?" That was your thing. Whenever things got bad, you'd sit down and talk calmly to her about it. She used to scoff at it every time... yet she was the one who suggested now for once. Something about it shook you so hard that it made the first tears finally spill at the recognition she had given you for all the work you've put into her.
Jinx panicked a little at that, unsure of how to comfort you, yet at Isha's stern frown and cross of her small arms, she just hugged you for the first time in a while. And god, did she miss it.
Perhaps it was good to show the little girl a picture of you after all.
"I'm sorry. I'm really sorry, I swear, sweetie! I... I won't ever say stuff like that again. Just don't leave me. Please don't leave me. I just, I was just-" You hushed her by just hugging her tighter and shaking your head. "It's okay... just hold me for a while. We can talk later... I missed you so much." You whispered, voice breaking into sobs. Jinx hummed weakly and sighed against your hair, the familiar scent making her relax and feel better at last.
Isha grinned to herself behind you before quickly sneaking off to let you talk things out.
》EKKO
To say that the entire firelight hideout was pissed at him would be an understatement. Absolutely everyone disagreed with the way he treated you, and the side eyes he got very much confirmed this. But the worst part of it all was definitely you avoiding him like the plague.
Every time he entered a room, you were the first one to leave in a hurry. Every time he tried speaking to you, you either ignored him or found an excuse to get away. Every time someone even mentioned his name to you, your mood seemed to dampen. And that hurt so much that it killed him. This isn't how he wanted you to feel about him. He was your boyfriend, damnit it. Yet he acknowledged that he was failing at his job way more than he should've allowed himself to. He had to fix this somehow.
Ekko couldn't just lose you over his own foolishness. You were the one person who motivated him to keep going even on his worst days. You were the light he fought for. The person he battled to come home to every day. He couldn't handle your absence any longer, especially at night when he laid wide awake in your empty bed without you.
And so, he finally had enough and cornered you one night up in the tree during a patrol you had together. One, he definitely didn't pull the strings for to happen. And ever the one to abide by his orders despite your current dismay, you were now avoiding his gaze whilst you watched your sleeping home below. It was peaceful and calm, but the pain lingered between you two too much to enjoy the moment. He didn't know how to break the deafening silence, and it made him think of backing out on his initial plan... until you surprised him by speaking up first.
"I'm... sorry for avoiding you. I didn't mean for this to become your last resort. I just... didn't want to be a burden anymore." "Wait, wait, wait... who said that you were a burden, I... I should be the one apologizing right now. Because I was wrong about every fucking thing I said to you." The words spilled out in panic at the mere thought of you blaming yourself. He never wanted you to feel like this. It made him feel even worse about himself. This wasn't right. "You're not useless. You do so much for us, for me, and I take it all for granted like the asshole I am! And I fully acknowledge that now... I shouldn't have snapped at you like that. There is no excuse for it." He shook his head in disappointment at himself, wondering if this was it now. He'd understand if you broke up with him now... but instead, you seemed to be in the mood to surprise him alot today.
"Did you... like the food I made you?" He blinked at your question in confusion, yet answered honestly. "Best thing I had all week." "Then I guess I'll forgive you... just don't do that again." Ekko chuckled weakly at your words, relief filling his senses whilst he pulled you close to press a kiss to your head. "Would never dream of it... wanna ditch patrol and fly around town?" You mirrored his sly smile, glad he had the same thing on his mind as you did. "Sure thing. But let's make it a race."
He let you win.
》SEVIKA
She took some time to cool off after your argument and returned later into the night with a clearer mind. Sevika had actually reflected on what you had said to her, and she knew you were ultimately right. She was extremely overprotective and stubborn, two things that didn't mesh well and often ended in her thinking you couldn't take care of yourself. Even if she knew better than to actually believe that.
You were strong, especially mentally. It's what drew her into you to begin with. But with the fall of Silco and a war being on the verge of breaking out against Piltover, she had no choice but to make sure that you never left her sight. And if you did, then you had to be somewhere she knew was safe and away from all the chaos she dealt with daily. It helped her focus and stay calm to know that you're okay. Yet despite how much she cared, she still fucked it all up for herself again.
And now she had to fix it, something she was never good at.
She felt awfully guilty at the sight of the things you've lovingly prepared for her, now laying forgotten and cold on the kitchen counter. She truly didn't deserve someone as kind as you. And yet she considered herself too selfish to let you go.
Slowly approaching the bedroom door, she paused to hear if you were awake or not. Unfortunately, you were, but she only knew this from the faintest sound of your sniffling and sobbing that drifted through the wooden door. Sighing to herself, she knocked once, deciding to just rake things slow and as calmly as possible. You had sustained an injury after all, and her mind was reeling at the thought of it getting worse without any proper care. "What do you want?!" Your weak voice yelled at her, and it made her frown. Yeah, you were definitely beyond pissed.
"I want to talk." Her gruff voice said, and it may have sounded like a demand if the underlying care and worry didn't overshadow it so clearly. Your silence made her initially think you were ignoring her until the door slowly opened and revealed your disheveled form. "... well, go ahead." You muttered, one hand cradling the side of your hip that was clumsily bandaged up by you. You were never good at stuff like that.
"Let me take care of the wound whilst we're at it. Can't have ya dying on me because of an infection." She sighed out before simply dragging you to your shared bed and pulling out your medkit. You didn't protest or complain and let her do as she pleased, whilst you carefully listened to her speak with an unreadable expression.
"Listen. I... get it. I really do. The way I treat you isn't right, and I know you're grown enough to take care of yourself, but... I can't risk losing you too now. It drives me crazy to think about. Even if that ain't much of an excuse, and I get that too." She was never this honest before. Usually, she simply deflected or blamed someone else. But here she was, for once admitting openly to being the problem. "Just... be more careful out there. That's all I ask of you. I won't comment on it otherwise anymore though, unless you're in serious danger. I promise." Finishing the last of her bandaging, she hummed at it now looking much securer. This way, you are sure to recover much faster.
Taking a deep breath, you nodded your head at her words, deciding to give her another chance to prove herself. You understood where she was coming from after all. "Okay, fine. I'll accept your apology... if you help me cook." She grinned at that slightly with a casual shrug. "Fine by me, if I get a taste of your heavenly cooking, sweetheart."
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