#THIS IS NOT ANTI ESME

[sophie-swan]

Anyone else just miss their DR babies? Like I have a six-month-old in my Twilight DR and I miss him terribly right now.

[itsallaboutbl]

WHAT IS THIS ROBOT???? 😳😳🔥

[nightingale2004]

Twilight next generation: Bella x Edward version

Elizabeth Rosaleise Swan Cullen

Faceclaim: Katie Douglas

Oldest daughter of Edward Cullen and Bella Swan and the firstborn triplet

Elizabeth is a vampire human hybrid, otherwise known as a Dhampir in her family

She looks more like her mother with a bit of her father

Elizabeth prefers to be called Liz, Lizzy, Elly, or Eliza for shirt

Like most of her family, she is gifted and she has the ability of mind control

Elizabeth and her siblings were born in Forks Washington, but as soon as they were born, her family immediately packed up and made their way straight to Alaska with the help of Jacob and his pack

Liz has a love for dancing, and her family comes all to her dance shows. Her favorite is ballet, the waltz, and also playing "Just Dance"

Has more control over her thirst for blood than her siblings

She's not really close with her parents but feels more close with the rest of her family.

She always wanted to meet her mom's parents. After they moved back to Forks, she developed a very great relationship with her grandfather Charlie Swan and his new wife, Sue Clearwater

Feels closer with her aunt Rosalie and her Uncle Emmett.

She always challenges her uncle Emmett to a dance off (which she always wins)

Loves her sister Renesmee

She is a bookworm like her dad and also has a major collection of music records

Loves her family very much

She often dances in private to let off a little steam or when she needs to clear her head

Has a great sense of fashion (thanks to her aunt Alice)

She's a loner like her dad and prefers her solitude, but there are times when she loves the comfort of her family

Is also a lover of yoga

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

E.J (Edward Jr.) Masen Swan Cullen

Faceclaim: Timothée Chalamet

E.J. is the second born triplet and firstborn son of Edward Anthony Masen Cullen and Isabella Marie Swan

Like his sisters, he is also a Dhampir

He is called Eddie, Ed, mini Ed, or mini Edward by his family (mostly by his uncle Emmett)

He has a gift as well, which is telekinesis (moving things with his mind)

When E.J. shared his mother's womb with his sisters, the three of them could communicate with each other through their minds

E.J. and his sister's still have psychic conversations with each other in case they don't want their parents hearing them

E.J. takes after his father in appearance but has his mother's awkward introverted personality

E.J. is an artistic soul and loves painting, drawing and sketching.

He is a big loner.

Prefers silence but loves hearing his younger sister Nessie play piano

Loves playing chess with Edward

He often sketches his family or anything he sees

Loves training with his uncle Jasper

He is a little gentleman and modern feminist

A big bookworm

He is Esme's favorite (don't tell anyone🤫)

He is closer with his dad and often seeks him out for advice along with his uncle Jasper and Grandfather Carlisle

He is a baseball champion and one of the fastest runners in the Cullen clan

°▪︎°▪︎°▪︎°▪︎°▪︎°▪︎°▪︎°▪︎°▪︎°▪︎°▪︎°▪︎°▪︎°▪︎°▪︎°▪︎°▪︎°▪︎°▪︎°▪︎°▪︎°▪︎°▪︎°▪︎°▪︎°▪︎°

Renesmee Carlie Swan Cullen

Faceclaim: Mackenzie Foy

Renesmee is the youngest child of Edward and Bella Cullen and the third triplet out of her siblings

She is a mommy's girl

Takes after both her parents but has her father's beauty in Bella's opinion

Also a Dhampir

Unlike her older siblings, she is actually very social and loves interacting with her family and making new friends

She loves playing piano and is a piano protege

She is very close with almost all her family

She is called Nessie, Ren, Nes and Beautiful by her family

She and her siblings grew up in Alaska, but when the triplets became teens, Bella wanted to go back to Forks and managed to convince everyone to join her

Renesmee has a bit of difficulty controlling her thirst and can sometimes go into a spiral, which is a risk to her family.

When Ness and her family moved to Forks, it wasn't an easy adjustment, but they soon grew comfortable. At least until the wolf shifter and Volturi drama happened.

Renesmee writes her own music and original pieces. She also plays music for Lizzie to dance to.

She hates seeing her family argue with each other or see her parents fight

Her gift is shield penetration and thought transmission. She can also have psychic conversations.

Renesmee tries to see the bright side of things and tries to make everyone happy.

(Before anyone asks: No! JACOB DOES NOT IMPRINT ON RENESMEE IN THIS UNIVERSE AND I REFUSE TO MAKE IT CANON!!!)

[thecarnivorousmuffinmeta]

What if Bella was just a hallucination Edward was having but she didn't exist to anyone else?

Beautiful, anon, beautiful.

There's No New Girl in Forks

Midnight Sun starts a slight bit differently.

The Cullens are eating lunch as usual, Edward's bemoaning that he's in an endless purgatory of teenage filth (that he himself chose to frequent, Edward) and Edward vaguely notes the new girl that doesn't exist.

He's mildly surprised no one else seems to care about the new girl, she's good looking enough, he guesses, but it seems the denziens of Forks don't give a flying fuck.

He does get mildly annoyed when he sees that Jessica, Lauren, Mike, etc. are completely ignoring the girl at lunch. He knew Jessica was vain and self-centered, but this really goes beyond the pale. Wow, Forks sucks a lot.

Edward, however, doesn't comment on this to his family as it's just boring normal Forks behavior to him. He feels no need to acknowledge it's even happening and thinks his family's doing a great job being above it all (they're not as this girl doesn't actually exist).

Then Biology happens.

Edward Nearly Eats the Girl Who Doesn't Exist

Edward doesn't explain much of anything to the family.

He tells Carlisle he nearly ate someone (Bella Swan, Edward says, and Carlisle has a brief moment of 'who' but figures it's not worth focusing on when Edward seems to need to desperately leave the area) and then he's gone.

The Cullens try to puzzle out who it is/why Edward would react like that.

Someone must have had a nosebleed in Biology, they eventually figure, and like canon Alice feels terrible for missing it by focusing so much on what could happen to Jasper.

Edward comes back not long after and puts on a very brave face. The family's not as concerned this time around as they don't think it's a specific person's scent, all the same people are there after all, it must have just been a bad day/nose bleed. The likelihood of nosebleed happening again is probably pretty miniscule.

Carlisle gently reminds Edward that they tend to do blood testing in Biology and he may uh want to skip that day. Edward privately agrees but is mortified Carlisle says as much.

Edward Starts Talking to an Empty Seat

Edward interrogates the empty seat, determined to discover whether or not she's realized Edward is strange (the entire class now has as Edward's conversing with an empty chair, it's fucking weird, they figure he's role playing or something).

Edward finds himself intrigued, she gives answers he never would have suspected (almost as if she's not really a person).

This is terrible because the next day she's nearly hit by a van. Edward miraculously saves her in time.

His family wonders why the fuck Edward darted across the parking lot to save Jessica Stanley's front bumper.

"The rest of the car is totaled anyway" Emmett notes, Edward didn't even save the fucking car. And it's a really shitty car!

There's no vote that evening (despite Edward being shocked that there isn't one) as no one saw Edward's mad dash across the parking lot to not save Jessica's car.

Rosalie gives him hell for this, Edward thinks she's being callous dismissing Bella's life so easily and he points out that Bella could have died.

Rosalie thinks "Bella" is a hypothetical high school student who, in theory, could have been standing right there. She can't even.

Edward Starts Creeping in an Empty Room

Edward, unable to deny himself any longer, starts running out of the house to spy on the sleeping Bella in Charlie Swan's empty office that he thinks is a bedroom.

He asks himself why he saved her from the van and if she hasn't been sent here to torment him.

50/50 he eats Bella then and hides for several weeks from his family/potentially forever out of shame and the family has no idea what's happened to him and why the other 50 is he decides he must be in love.

Edward is in Love

Canon proceeds as Edward bails on his family to have lunch with an empty chair.

They feel vaguely insulted and very confused when Edward... starts talking to it about... theories.

"The fuck is he doing?" Rosalie asks, but then decides Edward's being a nerd or something. If she asks, Edward will just pretend Rosalie's the one being stupid and she won't fall for this obvious bait.

There's no Port Angeles as Alice doesn't have the vision that Bella's in danger (as Bella doesn't exist). Instead, eventually, Bella confesses that she discovered Edward's a vampire (how, unexplained, as she never went to La Push as I don't think Edward would make that connection)

"This woman is a saint" Edward breathes as she professes to love him anyway despite his vampirism. He takes her to the meadow and nearly eats her. What he's really doing, of course, is frolicking around by himself in the sunlight with a blouse on.

Edward has a great time.

Then comes the moment.

Edward invites Bella over to meet his family.

The Family Feels Very Taken Aback

"What?" they all ask, "Who?"

This is even worse than canon, where Bella Swan at least existed, and they saw Edward have conversations with her/nearly eat her. This is coming completely out of left field.

They don't even know a Bella! Where the fuck is she from?

"Oh, you're hilarious," Edward responds, laughing, thinking Carlisle's making a joke about how small of a town Forks is and how unlikely it is Edward would find his soulmate right here in high school.

Carlisle's not joking.

The family has an emergency meeting trying to figure out what anyone knows about this. Alice has seen nothing, she hasn't even seen this girl come over, there's a giant blank space.

Edward postulates that she's also immune to Alice's gift. It explains a lot, there's a lot that Alice should have been picking up on and since she's immune to Edward as well it would make sense.

"Uh, sure" Alice says, not sure how to feel about this at all or that a complete stranger is about to enter her life and might become a sister.

(She puts on a very brave face.)

Rosalie thinks this is a horrible idea. Edward, this girl has no reason to get involved. You've potentially ruined her life for no reason, behind everyone's back, what the fuck.

Edward tells her she wouldn't understand and likely makes a crack about Emmett.

Regardless, it's made clear, the girl's coming over in a few hours.

Rosalie bolts, she can't do this. She will not be a part of this, she needs to process and she is out! Emmett goes with her.

This leaves the rest of them. They hold their breath...

The Emperor Has No Clothes

Edward opens the door for nobody.

He talks to thin air, as if there's a person there, and looks at them as if expecting them to react. They have 0.005 seconds.

Esme recovers first and greets Bella with a warm smile. She punches Carlisle in the stomach, "Play along, dear!" as she assumes Edward's playing a game of some sort and this is some kind of hilarious (but not really) joke.

"Welcome to our house... Bella..." Carlisle somehow manages.

Alice and Jasper quickly disappear, they want no part in this.

Edward gives the thin air a tour of the house getting into a weird amount of Carlisle's personal history with it (Carlisle really really really doesn't feel comfortable about this).

Esme decides she should make pasta. Her name's "Bella" right? Isn't that Italian?

":/" - Carlisle Cullen

Eventually, Bella leaves, and Edward informs the family they did a marvelous job "EXCEPT FOR YOU, ROSALIE".

The family just kind of smiles awkwardly and laughs, waiting for Edward to drop the punch line of it all being a joke.

He doesn't.

The family has an emergency meeting.

Is Edward Fucking with Us?

There's heated debate while Edward's out creeping on Bella for the night as the family sees a few options.

One is that Bella exists but can be neither seen, nor heard, nor smelled. This is Esme's theory. It's... politely dropped.

Another is that Edward believes Bella exists and has gone completely mad. This is also moved past. It's a theory, and Edward has been acting a bit erratic (especially when Peter and Charlotte were visiting) but he's very consistent and this is also the first they've really heard of this.

A third is that Edward's getting passive aggressive bizarre revenge for the unspoken desire for him to get a girlfriend already. Nobody's said anything, nobody thought it was that big of a deal, but Edward must have been chafing at always being the odd man out and being pitied that this is his way of finally having enough.

This last is what they eventually settle on.

Rosalie still can't even.

"Well, what are we going to do about it?"

Alice sees confronting Edward going very bad places. Very... argumentative places, Edward apparently won't be breaking character until after the DVD commentary.

The best thing they can do, she informs them, is go along with it until Edward gets bored and realizes this is silly and nobody cares that he's single.

They all acknowledge that, as it's Edward and he's very stubborn, that could take a while...

Bella's Invited to a Baseball Game

Alice notes that it's a great day to play baseball! Oh, oh, Bella's coming too? Oh. Great.

Edward notes his family's lack of enthusiasm and informs them that they're being awful (ESPECIALLY YOU, ROSALIE) Think about it from Bella's perspective who has been so accepting of their nature. And here they are, acting like she's dirt beneath their feet.

"Alright, fine," Rosalie says, "I'll be the nicest person ever."

Edward watches in horror and embarrassment as Rosalie proceeds to be almost saccharine sweet to Bella (Bella of course is very flustered by the attention but is too naive to realize Rosalie's not being sincere at all).

The baseball game goes ahead as schelduled then to Edward's horror other vampires show up.

The Cullens... pause. Are they going to stop pretending now? Edward? Edward? Please? This will get very weird very fast and potentially dangeorus. Edward?!

Edward doesn't say anything but he starts acting really shifty, as if he's trying to hide someone from James, Victoria, and Laurent. He's also snarling.

"This is Edward," Carlisle introduces lamely.

As there's no tasty human to goad the Cullens with, while James is intrigued by Alice, I imagine he's actually too weirded out to do anything. They go on their way.

Edward is tormented he put Bella's life in such danger and vows to never do so again.

"... I think that's entirely possible" Carlisle notes, as Bella doesn't exist to be out in danger.

They Throw Bella a Birthday Party

Summer approaches and Bella is now invited to the house every day. The family vacates any room Edward's in as they don't want to be forced to talk to "Bella". Esme keeps making her cupcakes.

They frequently ask Alice how to make it stop or else when it will stop but so far as she can tell Edward will never decide to stop doing this so...

"For the foreseeable future" is what Alice notes much to the collective "ugh" of the family.

Emmett's just mildly disturbed by how in character Edward's getting. Though he does think Edward's waxing poetry about Bella is fucking hilarious (he doesn't know how he feels given that Edward's now funnier than him).

"Rock on, Edward" Emmett says.

Edward makes Alice throw Bella a birthday party.

Alice really doesn't want to. At all. She feels like Edward's just mocking her at this point. Even she's wondering when this will end.

Regardless, a birthday party is had and Alice is dismayed to learn that "Bella" didn't even want one. The girl is apparently too shy for parties or presents. Edward made her do this for nothing.

"Alice loves parties" - Edward to Bella

Jasper doesn't eat Bella because she doesn't exist. A very awkward party is had by all.

Things Continue

Things continue up until graduation at which point Edward professes he intends to leave Bella to live her human life for good.

("Thank fucking god" Rosalie says, it's a dumb conclusion to this dumb debacle but at least it's fucking over.)

They all conclude it's over and done with and gleefully plan the next move.

Except Edward ups and leaves.

He doesn't go to Rio, as there's no Victoria to chase, but he notes he needs some time to process his time away from Bella.

"... Sure, you do that" they all say, not sure what this is about but figuring Edward needs his space.

Edward leaves and... drops off the map. He stops calling, doesn't respond to them, and they start to get very worried. What the hell is going on with him?

Alice warns that any attempt at an intervention will lead to disaster. Just... let Edward get over this.

Edward likely goes to Dartmouth where the Bella in his head has gone to college. He watches her from afar, despairing when she gets a wonderful, intellectual, human boyfriend.

Edward sooner or later caves and decides to live apart from his family for the duration of Bella Swan's human life.

Eventually, We Reach Volterra

Edward goes to Volterra to kill himself when Bella dies.

Aro is greeted with this story (which from Edward's perspective is very real). "Oh, what a tragic story!" Aro notes, but as in canon notes he's not killing Edward over this.

Edward walks in the sun, there's no Bella to stop him.

Upon meeting the rest of the Cullens in the aftermath... Aro awkwardly learns there was no Bella.

He decides not to tell them that uh Edward wasn't joking.

[esmemarion]

We don't support gold star lesbians in this house

Instead we support Good Noodle lesbians, lesbians who deserve gold stars for being Good Noodles

[fangsbaby]

𝐖𝐄𝐋𝐂𝐎𝐌𝐄 𝐓𝐎 𝐌𝐘 𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐅𝐈𝐋𝐄

𝗵𝗲𝘆! 𝖲𝗈, 𝗍𝗁𝗂𝗌 𝗂𝗌 𝖫𝗎𝖼𝖺, 𝖨'𝗏𝖾 𝖻𝖾𝖾𝗇 𝖺𝗐𝖺𝗋𝖾 𝗈𝖿 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝘀𝗵𝗶𝗳𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗴

𝗰𝗼𝗺𝗺𝘂𝗻𝗶𝘁𝘆 𝖿𝗈𝗋 𝗇𝗈𝗐 𝗂𝗍 𝗌𝖾𝖾𝗆𝗌 𝗅𝗂𝗄𝖾 𝖺 𝗐𝗁𝗂𝗅𝖾, 𝖻𝗎𝗍 𝖨'𝗏𝖾 𝗇𝖾𝗏𝖾𝗋 𝗉𝗈𝗌𝗍𝖾𝖽 𝖺𝖻𝗈𝗎𝗍

𝗂𝗍. 𝖨'𝖽 𝗅𝗂𝗄𝖾 𝗍𝗈 𝗍𝖺𝗅𝗄 𝖺𝖻𝗈𝗎𝗍 𝗌𝗁𝗂𝖿𝗍𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝗐𝗂𝗍𝗁 𝗈𝗍𝗁𝖾𝗋 𝗉𝖾𝗈𝗉𝗅𝖾 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝗌𝗁𝖺𝗋𝖾

𝗍𝗁𝗈𝗎𝗀𝗁𝗍𝗌 𝖺𝖻𝗈𝗎𝗍 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝗌𝗁𝗂𝖿𝗍𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝗂𝗍𝗌𝖾𝗅𝖿, 𝖾𝗏𝖾𝗇

𝗂𝖿 𝖨 '𝘥𝘪𝘥𝘯'𝘵 𝘴𝘩𝘪𝘧𝘵' 𝗎𝗇𝗍𝗂𝗅 𝗇𝗈𝗐. 𝖨𝗍 𝗐𝗈𝗎𝗅𝖽 𝖻𝖾 𝗋𝖾𝖺𝗅𝗅𝗒 𝗅𝗈𝗏𝖾𝗅𝗒 𝗍𝗈 𝗄𝗇𝗈𝗐 𝗆𝗈𝗋𝖾

𝖺𝖻𝗈𝗎𝗍 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝗀𝖾𝗇𝖾𝗋𝖺𝗅 𝗂𝗇𝗍𝖾𝗋𝖾𝗌𝗍𝗌 𝖺𝖻𝗈𝗎𝗍 𝗒'𝖺𝗅𝗅. 𝖨𝖿 𝗒𝗈𝗎, 𝗉𝗋𝖾𝗍𝗍𝗒 𝗀𝖾𝗇𝗍𝗅𝖾𝗆𝖺𝗇/𝗅𝖺𝖽𝗒,

𝖺𝗋𝖾 𝗂𝗇𝗍𝖾𝗋𝖾𝗌𝗍𝖾𝖽 𝗍𝗈 𝖻𝖾𝖼𝗈𝗆𝖾 𝗆𝗎𝗍𝗎𝖺𝗅𝗌 𝗐𝗂𝗍𝗁 𝗆𝖾, 𝗁𝖾𝗋𝖾 𝖨 𝖽𝗋𝗈𝗉 𝗌𝗈𝗆𝖾

𝖼𝖾𝗋𝗍𝖺𝗂𝗇 𝗂𝗇𝗍𝖾𝗋𝖾𝗌𝗍𝗌 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝗀𝖾𝗇𝖾𝗋𝖺𝗅 𝖽𝖺𝗍𝖺, 𝗈𝖿 𝖼𝗈𝗎𝗋𝗌𝖾.

𝟎𝟎 - 𝙢𝙖𝙞𝙣 𝙙𝙧; 𝘵𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵 (𝖺𝗅𝗌𝗈 𝗆𝗒 𝖽𝖾𝖺𝗋𝖾𝗌𝗍 𝗌𝖺𝗀𝖺).

𝟎𝟎𝟏 - 𝙣𝙖𝙢𝙚 / 𝙣𝙞𝙘𝙠𝙣𝙖𝙢𝙚𝙨; 𝖫𝗎𝖼𝖺, 𝖫𝗎𝖺𝗇.

𝟎𝟎𝟐 - 𝙜𝙚𝙣𝙧𝙚; 𝘮𝘢𝘭𝘦.

𝟎𝟎𝟑 - 𝙣𝙖𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣𝙖𝙡𝙞𝙩𝙮; 𝖠𝗋𝗀𝖾𝗇𝗍𝗂𝗇𝗂𝖺𝗇. (for everyone

to have a clue that english is not my

first language).

𝖨 𝖽𝗈𝗇'𝗍 𝗋𝖾𝖺𝗅𝗅𝗒 𝗄𝗇𝗈𝗐 𝗐𝗁𝖺𝗍 𝖾𝗅𝗌𝖾 𝖨 𝖼𝗈𝗎𝗅𝖽 𝖺𝖽𝖽 𝗍𝗈 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝗅𝗂𝗌𝗍,

𝖺𝗌 𝗒𝗈𝗎 𝗌𝖾𝖾 𝖨 𝖽𝗈𝗇𝗍 𝖽𝗈 𝗍𝗁𝗂𝗌 𝗍𝗒𝗉𝖾 𝗈𝖿 𝗍𝗁𝗂𝗇𝗀𝗌 𝗋𝖾𝖺𝗅𝗅𝗒 𝗈𝖿𝗍𝖾𝗇.

𝖡𝗎𝗍 𝖨 𝗐𝗂𝗅𝗅 𝖾𝗏𝖾𝗇𝗍𝗎𝖺𝗅𝗅𝗒 𝗀𝖾𝗍 𝗎𝗌𝖾𝖽 𝖺𝗍 𝗍𝗁𝗂𝗌 𝗍𝗒𝗉𝖾 𝗈𝖿 𝗂𝗇𝗍𝖾𝗋𝖺𝖼𝗍𝗂𝗈𝗇𝗌

𝖺𝗍 𝗌𝗈𝗆𝖾 𝗉𝗈𝗂𝗇𝗍. 𝖳𝗁𝖺𝗇𝗄 𝗒𝗈𝗎 𝖿𝗈𝗋 𝗋𝖾𝖺𝖽𝗂𝗇𝗀!

[queenofglassbeliever]

Renée turned Bella's bedroom into a yoga studio as soon as Bella was gone.

Esme, not a fighter and knowing Bella for less than a day, was ready to protect Bella with her life.

Renée and Esme are at opposite ends of a spectrum.

[mrowmrowmrow9]

If ur anti karamel/Mon-El and/or a superc*rp shipper plz DNI 🥰

[hahahax30]

Esme Hardcastle: professional theorist and horrible scapegoat

This is my Official Essay-Post complaining about the absurdity that was the family tree. I'll be trying to explain my thoughts in a well-structured manner.

Firstly, I think we can all agree that making that goddamn family tree was one of the greatest mistakes CC's ever made, if not the greatest. It's been haunting her and us since tlh was announced and, frankly, should never have seen the light of day. However, once it did, it was a reality whose incorrectness the story had to live with and explain. And CC explained it, but in the most underwhelming, unsatisfactory way possible.

We're told that Esme Hardcastle, an ascended mundane James first meets in the shadowhunter academy, was the mastermind behind the family tree and that her mind is, actually, quite underdeveloped, hence why the family tree is full of errors. Well, that is a good way to explain certain aspects of the family tree, for example:

Why Alastair's name is misspelled as 'Alistar' -> many English names have different spellings and Esme might not have known which one to go to for Alastair; or perhaps she just made a typo because she was writing the family tree too fast

Why Sona's name is way off -> Alastair is a bitch and who knows what lies he could've told her to get her to leave him alone

Why some people (like Thomas) are supposed to die earlier than we now can expect them to -> she got angry and shortened their fictional lifespans

If the family tree had only silly mistakes like those, then Esme's existence would be nice, but nope. The family tree royally fucked up.

For once, it shouldn't contain info up until tda, since Esme surely didn't get to live until 1995 (when Emma was born), but also, she's a real character in-universe. She's supposed to know everyone in tlh, she should know that Barbara and Christopher died in 1903, she should know that Christopher certainly didn't get to marry Grace nor have children with her (even if they'd married they wouldn't have had any because they're both ace). Why, then, did she write that?

Esme is stupid, but she's not blind ffs. If CC really wanted to make her the reason behind the family tree, she should've explained further why Esme went full happy-flower-power mode and imagined a whole future for a guy who died at sixteen: is she a hardcore gracetopher shipper? A conspiratorial theorist who, in spite of seeing Christopher's body literally burn in a pyre, still thought he was alive? Both? I guess we'll never know.

This is all, for obvious reasons, frustrating.

I'm beyond overjoyed that she won't make another family tree. I wouldn't be surprised if she actually wrote a trilogy about tlh's children after twp (since her idea of it being the last shadowhunter trilogy has pretty much disappeared) and I don't want her to have to make up any other stupid reasons for why xyz info is wrong because Idiotbrain McStupid wrote it to compliment his real-person fanfiction of the next generations.

[restinslices]

(I swear to y’all, imma go back to Mortal Kombat. But I have to rant. Imma pretend it’s the early 2000s and rant about Twilight. If you’re pro any of the Cullens, don’t even read this)

I’m not saying Jacob should’ve kissed Bella, but my thing is this; Jacob kisses you and you call him a dog and say you hope Edward kills him. Edward has done foul shit the ENTIRE SERIES and you let him slide repeatedly. There’s this part where Bella gets mad and says something like “at least Edward an act like an adult”. Bitch. He IS AN ADULT. What do you mean? Bella is way more harsh when it comes to Jacob and I don’t get why she holds so much anger towards this child and holds him to this high standard but has none of these feelings when it comes to the old ass adult she’s with. Since I’m typing, Stephanie Myers is weird and idc what y’all say. I remember Bella described Leah as beautiful in an EXOTIC way. MA’AM? It feels like she realized how asshole-ish the Cullens are and tried to make the wolves seem worse but all I’m thinking is “they’re definitely in the right when it comes to not liking the Cullens”.

The wolves don’t like vampires because they’re a safety risk. The Cullens being there (keep in mind, they’re rich enough to leave and never come back) is triggering these young ass people to turn into wolves. The Cullens don’t like the wolves because?? They have no valid reason. Edward constantly says the wolves are dangerous and yeah, they’re not the safest to be around but compared to vampires they’re a lot safer. Bella has only been harmed by vampires and only the vampires have tried to end her life. James, Laurent, Jasper, Victoria, the new born army that’s forming, the Volturi. She’s only been in danger because of the wolves once. Like, I don’t get how Stephanie expects us to agree with Edward when there’s proof that the wolves are way safer. Not 100% safe but better than vampires. And while I love Seth, I swear Seth is the “you’re not like the others” character. They only like Seth because he doesn’t hold animosity towards them as if that animosity isn’t valid. It’s giving “you’re not like other blacks, you talk proper” (ik he’s not black, it’s an example). I’m finishing the books because I’m too deep to quit but I wish they let Victoria finish the job.

[piperslovebot]

Me hating on Zesme and shipping Fresme 😭😭😭

I am SUCH a hypocrite istg

[sophie-swan]

My Twilight DR!

PLS NOTE I'M STILL WORKING ON IT BUT THIS IS ALL I HAVE SO FAR!!

My Name: Sophie Swan.

Age: 18.

Species: Human to Siren.

Birthday: December 15th, 1986.

Skills / Hobbies: Baking, and Danicng.

Family:

The Swan's: My Adoptive Family.

I’m the older adoptive sister of Bella Swan. I was about two months old when Charlie and Renee adopted me. It was a very normal-ish childhood.

I've always had a necklace with me since I was a baby. It's a silver chain with a pink amethyst. I always thought Renee or Charlie had given me it. (But eventually I find out that it's from my birth mother. She had a witch spell it to keep my mermaid side from coming out.)

Although Renee doesn’t really like me cause she always wanted to have a boy and a girl but instead got stuck with two girls. She also didn't like that I was 17 when I had Jaxson. He's about six-months-old from where I'm shifting.

I’ve always been way closer to Charlie to be honest. I always wanted to live with Charlie but Renee insisted I stay with Bella.

But unlike Bella I visited Charlie every single summer up until we move to Forks.

Me and Bella have a love hate relationship. We're complete polar opposites which makes it hard for us to bond over quite literally anything. Plus I think she's been told things from Renee making her kinda resent me.

It doesn't help that the Cullens automatically click with me unlike they did with her.

The Quinnell's: My Biological Family.

My biological sister is actually one of the Cullens. Her names Iris Cullen she’s the youngest Cullen as she was only turned a couple years before I moved to forks and was taken in by the Cullens. She’s Emmett’s Mate.

I don't find out she's my sister until about half way through the school year. I only find out after I found out their vampires. I think it's a lot of shock to me.

I don't believe them at first. Not about the Vampire part but the sibling part.

But eventually I accept it and me and Iris become extremely close. Thankfully Jaxson got attached to her too fairly quickly.

Me and Iris don't go hunting for our parents until after the "battle". But when we do everyone's in full support in it. We end up finding out that our mother is Queen of the Sea named Aurora Hart-Quinnell. While our dad is a Vampire named Oliver Quinnell.

Aurora Hart is the queen of the sea. She is a mermaid queen who lives on the land. She goes back and forth between the kingdom and the house she lives on land.

While Oliver Quinnell is the Prince of Vampires. (Way before the Volturi became a thing.) He ruled for many many years before the Volturi overpowered him forcing him to step down. The Volturi took over because they found out about the affair between Oliver and Aurora.

Once the Volturi took over they made it their mission to try to destroy the mermaid kingdom. That's all happening as Aurora finds out she's pregnant with Twins.

That's the reason they had put us up for adoption because there was a war brewing between the two kingdoms/species. They thought we'd have the best luck at life far away from them and the kingdoms.

They also knew we'd find them eventually when the time was right. Thankfully we did. After the war our parents ended up getting married and they we're slowly trying to combine the two kingdoms.

My S/O:

My S/O or in this case my mate in my DR is Rosalie Hale.

Me and her meet on my first day at Forks and even though she was hesitant me and her instantly clicked becoming friends.

Eventually after a few days I introduce her to Jaxson and she instantly falls in love with him. And then by October me and Rosalie we're together.

I found out she's a vampire around mid September. At first I didn't know how to feel but eventually I knew that if she wanted to hurt me she had plenty of chances to do so before and she didn't.

Unlike Edward and Bella me and Rose don't break up one time once we get together. That was because I got turned into a vampire before they went to Alaska so me and Jaxson got to go to Alaska with them. (Yes we ditched Bella.)

Alaska was amazing though we had a lot of firsts with Jaxson. He got to see his first snow. And got to help put the tree up.

Carlisle and Esme had given me and Rosalie an ornament with me, her, and Jaxson together with the year 2005 a crossed it.

We eventually get marries but I never like scripting proposals or anything like that because I like letting that part happen by itself.

Species in my DR:

There's six main species in my DR not including Humans.

Vampires:

They don’t shine or burn in the sun. (The suns just very uncomfortable.)

They can sleep.

Their hair grows.

They can eat human food.

They stay a live as long as they have some type of blood. (Rather that be animal or human.)

In order to turn into a vampire you have to be injected with venom from one.

Steak to the heart is the only way to kill them!

They can heal humans with their blood but most of the time they don’t. Vampire blood can give a human temporary vampire abilities. Also having to much vampire blood can make them trip out making it seem like their drunk.

They’re not marble they’re skin is as normal as a humans just slightly paler.

They can compel humans.

They have fangs but they only show when they feed.

Werewolfs:

Becoming a werewolf is mainly hereditary but in some cases it's caused by a curse.

They can turn whenever they want.

They have a peace treaty with just about every species besides human because humans don't know they exist. (Yet.)

They can be really powerful and closed off to others.

They're extremely warm.

Mermaids:

There's two different types. One type chooses to live solely in the ocean. Where as the second type goes back and forth.

They can all go on land whenever they please though!

Their hair grows rarely quickly.

They can eat human food.

They stay a live as long as they have some type of blood. (Rather that be animal or human.).

Being a Mermaid is only hereditary.

Unlike most theories they're immortality.

Only a witch could actually fully kill them. Unless the king/queen kills them! So basically they can only die by the king/queen or the witches.

Most Mermaids and witches are best friends.

Sirens:

Sirens are hybrids. They're half Vampire Half Mermaid.

They can stay either on land or in the ocean.

Sirens are only born! They are not made. But they only show their vampire side if they were to get bit. (It's kinda confusing but think of how Tyler Lockwood from The Vampire Diaries only triggered his werewolf genes if he killed someone. Basically the same thing but instead of killing to trigger it you have to be bitten.)

They're very rare as Mermaids and Vampires don't really ever cross paths.

They stay alive as long as they have some type of blood. (Rather that be animal or human.) And they go into the water for a couples days each week.

They only way to not show a mermaid side is to have a witch make a certain necklace stopping the transformation from happening.

The transformation can hurt at first but sometimes it doesn't

Steak to the heart is the only way to kill them!

Since they're half vampire they can heal humans with their blood but most of the time they don’t. Vampire blood can give a human temporary vampire abilities. Also having to much vampire blood can make them trip out making it seem like their drunk.

They can compel humans. Either by having them look into their eyes and demanding them or by just their voice.

They have fangs but they only show when they feed.

Fairies:

They live within the forests.

They aren't really small unless they're flying then all the are is a speck of light.

Most of them are pure evil. There some good ones though.

If you go into a forest and run into one don't say 'thank you'. They'll think you owe them something and we'll be forced to do as many tasks for them as they please.

They love pranking humans. Like they live for that.

They only trust the witches.

They are not immortal but they live in large groups so if you kill one of them you'll have the whole group onto you!

They can heal humans but the choose not too.

They can compel humans.

Most come into town and they live like normal people but they don't at the same time.

Witches:

They're mainly friends with only the fairies and mermaids.

They can do spells for just literally everything.

They love nature as most of them use it for their potions and spells.

They can help Vampires with the sun being uncomfortable but the usually don't. They don't really trust vampires that includes Sirens.

Being a witch can be learned but it's mostly Hereditary.

Some actually have wands but most the time it's rare.

They live all around humans, the humans just don't realize it.

If you have any questions please ask I'll gladly answer them!

[itsallaboutbl]

i'm half way through this show and wow. loving it

[netflixnormalthings]

Hi totally random ronance shipper you’ve never met before here who saw your post and now I’m going to rant about how much I hate st*ncy.

like I’m a hater. fr. because their character arcs are so different, because they’ve changed and grown apart so much, because part of the reason Steve said he liked robin was because she wasn’t like Nancy only for him to be in love with her again in s4

and not only that, Nancy deserves so much better than to be thrown in this stupid love triangle, with St*ve basically shoving her feelings onto her while J*nathan lies to her face about college (censoring their names bc even tho I like both of them this is technically slander)

(You know who isn’t shoving her feelings onto Nancy, who respects and encourages her— Robin. But I digress)

Yeah tl:dr I have a special hatred for st*ncy <3

you are literally so valid mysterious stranger who i have never heard of before in my life! i appreciate ranting because i wanted to hear people's rants and so some ranting myself. also because Science since different shippers tend to have different points of focus for their hatred of stanky.

yeah literally he said her was over nancy??? except later he decided to tell nancy, who had a boyfriend and called his dream a nightmare for her personally, needed to know that she was part of his dream of six children in suburbia. like honestly very No i would have taken drastic action to make my discomfort known

agree with you on the j*hnathan thing but im not getting in to that rn since this is an anti-stanky post

special hatred is so real because they have literally said that they have diametrically opposed and mutually exclusive pans for the future !!!

thanks for the ask and if yall wanna jump on the hater train tell me why you hate st*ncy and what alternate ships/scenarios you prefer for the sake of seeing how different corners of fandom view this and also to rag on stanky

[thecarnivorousmuffinmeta]

If I remember correctly you said once (if it was Vinelle my apologies) that Esme/Carlisle won't work out in the long term because they have different priorities (Carlisle human life, Esme Edward's whims), but wouldn't the same be true about Aro/Carlisle? Greetings

It was @therealvinelle's post but I reference it frequently. Further thoughts on Aro/Carlisle in here.

And oh, you beautiful person, you assume we ship things because we believe they'll work out in the end/do well together and are tumblr healthy relationships. This is the most beautiful assumption I've seen all week.

Specifically, we actually don't think Aro/Carlisle would work either post canon or before in an AU world/why the relationship fell apart.

The difference between Esme/Carlisle and Aro/Carlisle is that there is a fundamental misconception of who the other is. Aro and Carlisle know they have this fundamental difference of opinion that, while it didn't destroy the friendship, ultimately meant their relationship couldn't last (and doesn't canonically).

Carlisle and Esme both believe they're different people, thinking the other shares the same priorities and beliefs that they have, when this is in fact not the case. There's nothing obvious like a diet, one being a warlord, or anything else standing between them, nothing should be in their way: what stands in their way is the fundamental truth that they do not know who the other is and sooner or later this will become apparent.

But as you point out, I never said Aro/Carlisle is more stable or any less doomed. It's just interesting to me personally/I don't put faith in Esme/Carlisle lasting in the long run. That and, noting that Aro/Carlisle exists at all, that there was the potential of romance there, on this website and in other places is considered the height of blasphemy.

We ship things because they're interesting, not because they're not doomed.

[stars-and-birds]

i dont even care. live your truth or whatever.