#THEYRE SO TENDER. HELP ME
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verysleepyfrog · 2 years ago
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every time frodo says “oh sam” i start sobbing and heaving and screaming and tearing off my skin and screaming “NO!!!!!! STOP!!!!! NO!!!!!!!!!!” and weeping and falling to my knees on the ground and stabbing myself repeatedly in the stomach and banging my head on the wall and shaking because nothing i experience will ever be that tender etc etc
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bericas · 10 months ago
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isaac & scott / mason & theo | sometimes all i think about is you
#twedit#twvid#scisaac#mason x theo#twrarepair#back on my scisaac masontheo parallel bullshit btw#back on my masontheo is just scisaac if they were True enemies to lovers bullshit. btw. if anyone was wondering.#like of course scisaac and masontheo get paintaking scenes. its enemies to lovers. ofc mason calls theo a bitch its FULL enemies to lovers#for clarity the hands at the rave and the masontheo hug r parallels to ME bc its touch with an excuse for it#scisaac can brush hands when theyre holding a needle between them and theo can hug mason when its a means to an end#the rest i feel r fairly straightforward but i wanted to share the vision for that one#mason hewitt#theo raeken#scott mccall#isaac lahey#tw#oh also the last shot is the last shot of isaac and theo respectively. if that wasnt clear.#like how isaac and theo both nebulously sort of Gone from beacon hills#and the theo shot also to me looks like footage from The masontheo ep 618. btw. which just brings me joy#actually i have more to say. hi. masontheo r just so.#you know how isaac kind of has. he has the awkward tenderness of someone who has never been loved and is forced to improvise#theo doesnt even have THAT!!!! scott holds out a hand and isaac takes it with an awkward fervor#mason keeps his hands to himself because he doesn't trust what theo might do with it and theo can only help when its helping himself#bc the tenderness will be TOO AWKWARD. so isaac says he wont leave without scott and theo says we need to find him so i cant leave you#so isaac grabs scott because scott makes him feel safe and theo can only grab mason when its part of a script bc thats how he feels safe#HELLO. IS THIS THING ON. DO U GUYS HEAR ME. SCISAAC IF THEY WERE TRUE ENEMIES TO LOVERS!!!!
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jackass-jones · 6 months ago
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My madoka magica hot take is I like sayaka/kyoko as a ship more than madoka/homura
#madoka magica#both ships are very very good and make me feral but god kyoko/sayaka really caters to me#i am biased cuz sayaka is my favorite character lol and i just want good things for her#but i mean we get them as enemies fighting to the death obsessively like sayaka gets so focused on proving herself to kyoko she cant think#of anything else and she wastes her energy fighting her instead of witches and just the foil like#both used their wish to grant something for someone else and kyoko lost everything as a result and decided that nothing good will ever come#of helping others so she should only look after number one and of course shed think that cuz shes all she has left#meanwhile sayaka refuses to take care of herself because she never wants others to suffer so she only exists for others#and both of them change their perspectives in pursuit of each other theyre literally red and blue#and i love seeing the development of their relationship and kyokos feelings i love her offering to kill ryosuke for sayaka#and how terrified she is in that moment when she sees sayakas lifeless body separated from the soul gem#or how she shares her story and remembers why she started fighting because of sayaka and fucking#THE WAY SHE ACTS SELFLESSLY AND STUPIDLY OPTIMISTIC TO SAVE SAYAKA FROM HER WITCH FOR#THE WAY SHE SACRIFICES HERSELF TO CONNECT WITH HER THE LOVE SONG#THEM HOLDING HANDS WHILE SAYAKA CRIES AND KYOKO IS THERE FOR HER AND THEY UNDERSTAND EACH OTHER SO WELL#god fucking dammit these fucking gay people are ruining my sleep#yeah idk if its obvious but i have a specific type when it comes to ships i love when characters beat each other up and are the center of#each others motivations and go through the horrors together and come out the other side and love each other deeply#love each others flaws and theres understanding and tenderness#i haaaave to draw them but i also have to draw a lot of blorbos rn alkksk
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arsenicflame · 6 months ago
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the way i play with Izzyverse is with every Izzy forming from a branching timeline- that they were all the same at some point, only one thing sent them off on the path to be "someones". some are obvious; Sam, Ed, Jack & Hornigold branch from the mutiny- a split second decision on who to go with, a miss timed hit leaving him in Hornigolds grasp- but the others are less so. how would he become Jackie's, or Ned's, or Anne and Mary's? what happens to make an Izzy Stede's? how do they even meet?
#for me; a stedes izzy has to form Early#before any relationships to ed or sam or anyone suited to his 'hard' life#because i think once hes caught in their orbit its pretty much game over. earth and moon#i dont think stede would stand a chance#i think. theyre kids. izzys been sailing for a few months. hes becoming a hardened pirate. but hes still really only 14/15#and theyre in port one day. and he runs into this 9/10 year old kid. its stede#hes lost; he was running from some bullies but now hes turned around and the suns going down#hes this scared little rich kid in a rough part of town and thats where izzy comes across him; hiding in an alley#behind some crates. now izzys not exactly tender of heart but he does have a particular soft spot for children#he remembers being that child. cowering behind crates. running for safety. maybe its not the same but he cant help but feel this kinship#with stede. so rather than walking by; he speaks to this child#where it goes from there? who knows. i dont think izzy would let baby stede run away to be a pirate#(even if he wants to) but maybe they figure out something else#something happens that drags izzy into his orbit. that makes him be owned by him#nyxtalks#ofmd#izzyverse#(i think it probably works better pre hornigold izzy but. in my set up thats the first time he sees the sea so. fuck me i guess)#made my own bed n all#ill probably rewrite up this tag bit. at some point#sorry this was on the mind#probably not interesting to anyone but meeeee
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hopefullyababe · 2 years ago
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should not be exposed to an unlimited quantity of dlicious and preprepared food whilst menstruating. i have eated 9 tacos and dranken 4 beverages
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crystallizsch · 3 months ago
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oki my job here's done 🫡 jamimayu nation where are u-
good morning o7
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i guess if i want more shippy jamimayu i’ll do it myself 😤✨
IAN W HAT.
YOU COME INTO MY INBOX WHILE IM AWAY JUST TO DO THIS- I- HFKSDJDFSKFJSAKL???? I opened this in public and had to struggle so hard just to maintain a straight face I had to panic exit sO FAST-
THEY'RE SO CUTE AND SOFT IM GOING TO JUST COMBUST 💥💥💥😭😭 as I would expect of the local master of drawing tender Jamiyuu moments oh my god this was a calculated attack right on my heart farewell this is the end of me (lies down)
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Fine fine I will feed the jamimayu nation as well (population of maybe 3) you have very much Inspired me... technically I have once again reverted to my shitposting roots but HEY it was still cute enough I nuked myself drawing it
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variouspositions1984 · 1 year ago
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x files e14s04 'memento mori' absolutely obliterating me on this fine saturday morning
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springtyme · 1 year ago
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hii!! i saw ur inbox open and was wondering if i could request this; so, imagine dad!simon (or konig idm!!) having his son / daughter see his face for the first time since they were born and theyre just kinda sitting there like :000?? hes so pretty?? while yn is just screaming in the back?? <33 have a great day n thnaks for reading x
𝐔𝐧𝐦𝐚𝐬𝐤𝐞𝐝 𝐋𝐨𝐯𝐞 ♡
Thank you for the request, I had such a good time writing this! I love writing dad!Simon so much! ♡ but also, ngl, the image of this big bloke wearing a mask in front of his baby seems borderline comical to me.
Simon Riley x afab!reader || Masterlist || Ghost playlist
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summary: Your daughter finally sees her father's face for the first time.
word count: 2.2k
warning/tag: Mostly just dad!Simon fluff with a little hint of angst. No gendering terms are directly used for the reader, but they are pretty fem coded. It's mentioned that they were pregnant. No use of y/n.
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As the soft morning light filters through the curtains of your bedroom, you slowly begin stretching your limbs and blinking away the remnants of sleep. As you slowly settle into wakefulness, you hear the screeching sound of the baby monitor on your nightstand coming to life and you feel how your heart flutters happily in your chest as a familiar sound comes through. The sweet sound of your daughter’s happy coos, accompanied by Simon’s deep, gentle voice, fill the room with sweetness. 
“Morning, sweet pea,” Simon’s voice crackles through the monitor followed by the sound of your baby happily gurgling at her father and then exclaiming a little more whiny sound. “Yeah, yeah, I know you’re hungry, but we have to get you changed before we can make breakfast, lovie.”
A smile tugs at the corners of your lips as you lie there, basking in the warmth and comfort of your bed. The love and joy that echo through the monitor remind you of just how much love fills your home. It’s moments like these that make your heart swell with an indescribable sense of happiness.
Your mind wanders, and you find yourself reminiscing about the journey that brought you here. 
From the moment you and Simon first met, there was an undeniable connection, a spark that ignited and grew into a love that was both fierce and tender. However, it hadn’t been that easy to convince him that he in fact was deserving of such love. He had been scared that he would mess it up, mess you up, convinced himself that he wasn’t able to make anyone happy and that he was broken beyond repair. But you had been rather insisting, and he had finally let his walls crumble and let you into his heart. 
And as you had expected, all his worries had been unfounded. He is the best, most loving partner you could ever have dreamt of. 
The love you share with him is a love that feels like home.
And then, the arrival of your daughter added a new dimension to your love story. From the first time you had held her tiny hand, you knew that your family was complete. Watching Simon transform into the most loving and doting father has only deepened your admiration and affection for him.
And as you lie here,  reminiscing on your life, you can’t help but feel a profound sense of gratitude for the love that surrounds you. 
With a content sigh, you finally pull yourself out of bed, ready to start the weekend with your little family. 
As you make your way down the stairs you can hear the sound of your daughter’s laughter from the kitchen, filling your heart with warmth and you can’t help but smile and make your way towards the source of the joyful commotion. As you enter the room, the morning sun gently illuminates the kitchen, casting a soft glow over the room, and you are greeted by a heartwarming sight. Simon is standing at the stove, stirring a pot of millet porridge, your daughter’s favourite, while she is sitting in her highchair, which has been moved away from the kitchen table and closer to the counter, so she can see what Simon is doing, clapping her hands in delight.
The aroma of freshly brewed coffee fills the air, mingling with the comforting scent of the porridge. You can’t help but feel a surge of immense love and gratitude for the man who stands before you, effortlessly balancing the roles of partner and father.
Simon turns towards you. “Good morning, love,” he greets you, his eyes twinkling with warmth, the bottom half of his face covered by a black mask. He had started to wear it around the house again after your daughter had been born.  
“Good morning,” you reply, your voice filled with a mix of amusement and adoration. “I see you two are having quite the breakfast party.”
Simon laughs softly and nods. “We thought we’d surprise you with breakfast in bed, but it seems that someone couldn’t wait,” he says, glancing at your daughter, who just giggles in response.
You walk over to them, planting a soft kiss on Simon’s masked cheek before planting another on your daughter’s, much chubbier, one. “Well, I can’t say I’m disappointed. This is the best way to wake up,” you say, gazing at your little family with a heart full of love.
Together you finish cooking breakfast, porridge for the baby and scrambled eggs and turkey bacon for you and Simon.
You begin to set the table as Simon picks up your daughter, supporting her with one arm as he settles her on his hip, so he can move her chair back to the table, but before he can grab the chair he stops dead in his tracks.
Your little girl has grabbed a fistful of his mask in her tiny hand. She doesn’t seem to be pulling on it, or otherwise trying to take it off him, but she also doesn’t seem to want to let go of it when Simon gently takes her hand to get her to release her grip.  
“Sweetheart, please…” Simon says softly, but he trails off, a wave of emotions flickering over his eyes, but they end up having a sort of determinant look to them as they lock with his daughter’s.
You feel how your heart skips a beat as Simon lets go of her little hand to instead grip the place his mask is fastened.  
With a deep breath, Simon removes the mask, revealing his face to your daughter for the very first time in her young life. You feel goosebumps rise along your arms as Simon’s features come to light. The room falls silent, and time seems to stand still.
Your daughter’s gaze is fixed on Simon, you can see a whirlwind of emotions flickering across her little face. 
It’s a pivotal moment that holds the power to change everything. You can see how Simon, too, feels a mix of emotions coursing through him. 
He has once mentioned to you that he was afraid that his scars would scare her, but you have had a suspicion that something else might be the reason he has kept the mask on in front of her for. 
He does have a few scars from his work, but they are nowhere near severe enough to scare anyone. You do have another theory to why he has kept it on, one he hasn’t directly confirmed, but a conversation from your pregnancy has stuck with you. 
He had voiced his concern that something would happen to him on the battlefield. not because he was that concerned for his own wellbeing, he knew what the risks of his job was, but because he was afraid of something happening to him, leaving you and your little one alone in the world. He had, on the whole, had many worries about becoming a father. 
He had been worried that his past had broken him so severely that he couldn’t be the dad your daughter needed him to be. Like the fear he also had about you and your relationship in the beginning of it, the fear that he couldn’t be the man you deserved. 
He has, in all the time you’ve known him, done everything to disprove that concern, he is the best partner you could ask for and now the most lovable dad to your little girl, but you know that he still has his concerns and that his feelings about them are valid. 
You think the mask has served as a sort of safety blanket for him. Like he thought that it would be easier for you and your daughter to lose him if your little girl couldn’t remember his face, or something like that. You find that thought heart rending.               
You know that his job comes with a risk, you had known it when you got together and you had known it when you married him and you had known it when you got your daughter. Losing him on the battlefield would be your worst nightmare come true. You know that he is smart, strong and capable, but you also know that there are no guarantees in war, which, to you, is just all the more reason for  your daughter to know her father’s face, but you have let Simon choose for himself when he was ready for that.  
But you don’t want to think about any of that right now, so you push those thoughts away, and instead let yourself be completely mesmerised by the sight before you   
Your little girl focuses on his, now revealed, face, taking in every detail. Her eyes widening in surprise, curiosity, and perhaps even a hint of fear, her little mouth forming a perfect ‘o’ of surprise as she absorbs every detail of her father’s face. 
“It’s just me, princess,” Simon tells her, his voice filled with a mix of amusement, nerves and an overwhelming love for his little girl. His eyes, once guarded, now shine with warmth and affection. 
The confirmation of his voice is what convinces her. A wide smile spread across her little face, revealing the adorable dimples she has inherited from Simon, on her sweet, chubby cheeks. She lets out a happy squeal, as she realises that it really is her father who’s now smiling down at her, a set of dimples matching hers on his cheeks.    
She giggles happily, which, to you, is the most beautiful sound in the entire world. Her little hands starting to explore Simon’s face, her tiny fingers tracing the lines and contours of it. It’s a gentle and tender gesture that speaks volumes. You watch in awe as the beautiful moment between your daughter and her father unfolds in front of you. It’s a moment you will cherish forever. 
When she finally seems satisfied with her mapping of his face with her small hand, she turns her head to look over at you with an excited expression on her little face, one that conveys something along the lines of ‘you seeing this too?’ Her eyes lighting up, reflecting the genuine joy that fills her little heart.
“Yeah, baby, that’s your daddy,” you smile at her, and she lets out another happy shriek before looking back at Simon again, happily nuzzling her little face into his neck. “He’s handsome, isn’t he?” You continue as you step forward, placing a hand on her back, rubbing gentle circles over the dusty rose bodystocking that she is wearing, one that Simon picked out when he got her ready and you still laid in bed.   
You look up at Simon, a soft smile on his lips as your eyes lock. 
“He never wants to believe me when I tell him, but he is actually the most handsome man I know,” you say, with a playful glint in your eyes. “He’s probably the most handsome man in the whole world, actually.”           
Simon chuckles, his cheeks turning slightly pink. “Oh, come on now,” he replies, his voice a mix of embarrassment and amusement.“I think you might be a bit biassed there, love.”
You shake your head, a warm smile spreading across your face. “Nah, I don’t think I am,” you state, wrapping your arms around both Simon and your little girl in his arms. “Just stating facts. I actually got the most handsome husband and the most beautiful daughter in the whole wide world.” you say with a content sigh, hugging your little family tightly.  
It’s a hug that speaks volumes, conveying love, affection and acceptance. In this embrace, you know that you truly have the most beautiful family in the world.  
As you finally let go of them you place a sweet kiss on your daughter’s little nose. She giggles joyfully, and you can’t help but feel an overwhelming sense of gratefulness over what a happy little girl you have. Simon seems to be thinking the same as he smiles down at her.  
But your adorable little troublemaker doesn’t seem to be done with causing havoc yet.   
She reaches out her tiny hand and grabs for the mask again. Simon hesitates for a moment, looking down at the fabric in his hand, the symbol of his past, before letting her have it. The mask, once a symbol of his doubts and fears, now becomes a simple toy for your daughter as she happily shakes it up and down, a cheeky grin on her little face. 
You and Simon lock eyes, and then the two of you burst out in laughter.  
As your laughter fills the room, a sense of pure joy washes over you. You look at Simon, his eyes sparkling with happiness, and you know in this moment, that the love and bond the three of you share is unbreakable, and it fills your heart with an indescribable warmth.
With a deep sense of gratitude and contentment, you take a mental snapshot of this beautiful moment. It’s a memory that will forever be etched in your mind, a testament to the strength of your love and the joy that radiates from your little girl.
As the laughter subsides, you gather your family close again, embracing the love and happiness that surrounds you. In this embrace, you know that you have everything you could ever need.
Your daughter’s laughter and Simon’s unwavering love fill your life with immeasurable happiness, and you couldn’t be more grateful for the beautiful family you have created.
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xanaxspritz · 11 months ago
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a continuation of this post. cw: lactation kink, pregnant!reader, breastfeeding, nursing handjob, minors DNI.
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being pregnant for the most part wasn't fun. the first trimester consisted of constant headaches, nausea, and so much fatigue. now early in your second trimester you could feel your breasts grow more tender and even bigger, full with milk.
choso is a supportive partner during your pregnancy in more ways than one. he's overtaken all domestic duties in your apartment so you don't overexert yourself. he cooks and cleans, holds open every door for you. you weakly complain that you don't need the help, but choso insists. he knows you.
so when he sees you holding your breasts in pain, he knows he's needed.
"may i?" he asks.
"please" you sigh.
getting into position on the bed, you lay his head down on your breasts. you pull your tits out of your tank top, feeling the weight of your milk. you coax some out of one nipple, the pearly translucent white liquid slowly dripping. choso's breath hitches in anticipation.
slowly guiding his mouth to nipple, he sucks gently, mouth filling with the sweet taste of your milk.
"its so good baby" he moans into your nipple.
you feel instant relief.
choso licks around your areolas before going back to drink your sweet milk. "youre tits are so full of milk just for me" he moans again.
he sucks you dry before switching to the next one. you could see a tent growing in his pants. you reach down to take his cock out and stroke his length, surprised to already feel precum leaking out of his tip.
feeling some sort of weird mix of pain and pleasure, you can feel the wetness growing between your legs as he drinks more and more out of you. watching him nurse felt intimate, almost nurturing. and he's clearly enjoying himself, his eyes are closed in pure bliss, one hand holding on to your breast like its a bottle.
he fits both nipples into his mouth in one final suck before he let's go, cumming into your hand. he sighs happily as the last few remaining drops fall on his face
"so good" he repeats.
"would you be willing to make this a nightly thin? " you ask shyly, "they hurt when theyre full of milk"
"anything for you" and you know he means it with all his heart.
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loveanddeepspaceimagines · 4 months ago
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Do you think you could do something with the boys and an asthmatic reader? Whether theyre extremely or mildly asthmatic? Been struggling a little bit as the weather changes so I'd love to see your take on it! Thank you!
When you have asthma attack
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I'm so sorry that you are struggling, i hope you feel better soon! wish you well <3
I'm not very familiar on how Asthma works and how it feels to be asthmatic but i tried to put together something for you!
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Rafayel did know you were asthmatic, he just never seen you having Asthma Attack ,so when he found you hunched over on the floor, wheezing and struggling to catch your breath. The sight of you in distress sent a wave of panic through him. He quickly ran to your room to find your inhaler running back to you and knelt next to you. "y/n take a deep breath. Here, use this," he said, pressing the inhaler to your lips.
You took a deep breath, the medicine easing its way into your lungs. Rafayel rubbed your back, trying to help you regain your breath. "It's okay, baby. Just breathe. I'm here," he reassured you.
As your breathing steadied, he helped you to sit up, pulling you in his arms. "Do you want to lay down?" he asked softly, concern on his face.
You nodded, and he scooped you up carrying you to the bedroom. He laid you down gently, covering you with a blanket. He sat on the edge of the bed, watching you, making sure your breathing stayed steady.
He reached for a glass of water, bringing it to your lips. "Drink this," murmured, helping you to sip.
"Do you need anything else?" he asked. You shook your head, a small smile tugging at your lips. "Just you. Thank you for being here, Raf."
Radayel smiled back, his eyes soft. "Anytime, baby. You know I'm always here for you." He leaned down, pressing a tender kiss to your forehead. "Get some rest, and I'll make sure you're feeling better in no time."
⋆。‧˚ʚ ɞ˚‧。⋆
During one of mission with Xavier, you found yourself struggling to breathe, your asthma flaring up unexpectedly. The adrenaline and the chaos around you only made it worse. "Xavier, I can't... I can't breathe," you gasped, your hand moving to your pocket to look for inhaler.
Without hesitation, Xavier pulled your inhaler from your pocket, his hands steady as he helped you to your feet. He guided your hands to position the inhaler correctly, preparing to help you breathe in deeply.
"Take it slow baby," he murmured, his voice shaky but gentle. You followed his lead, inhaling the medication as he held you steady. He wrapped his arm around your waist, supporting you as you took deep breaths.
As your breathing started to even out, he checked your condition, his eyes never leaving yours. "Better?" You nodded, still catching your breath. "Yeah, thanks baby. I'm sorry."
He shook his head, dismissing your apology. "Don't be sorry. I've got you, y/n. We've got this." His hand squeezed yours reassuringly.
He helped you to lean against a wall for support, his free hand still holding your inhaler. He checked on you periodically throughout the mission, ensuring your asthma didn't flare up again.
When the mission was over, and the two of you were safe, Xavier made sure to sit you down and check on you properly. "Are you okay, now? Do you need anything?"
You smiled gratefully at him, his care and protection never failing to send flutter to your heart. "I'm fine, really. Just... thanks for looking out for me."
He returned your smile, his eyes filled with love. "Of course, Y/n. You know I'd do anything for you."
⋆。‧˚ʚ ɞ˚‧。⋆
You two were in the middle of what started as little argument, but quickly escalated due to your poor communication. Your chest tightened, and you gasped for air. The last thing you needed was an asthma attack, especially in such a tense situation.
Sylus noticed your struggle and immediately dropped the argument he was having with you. He moved to your side, his hands cupping your face. "Y/n, you're having an attack. Try to calm down Sweetie" he said, his voice firm yet gentle.
He moved to grab your inhaler from the nearby shelf and handed it to you, his eyes never leaving yours. You took a few puffs, feeling the cold mist soothe your chest. He rubbed your back helping you to relax and focus on your breathing.
"It's okay I'm here" he said, his voice a soft murmur as you tried to regain control over your breathing. "You can let it all out now. I'm not going anywhere."
You took a few more puffs from your inhaler, finally feeling the tightness in your chest loosen. You leaned into Sylus as He wrapped his arms around you, pulling you close.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean for this to happen," you whispered, feeling tears prick at the corners of your eyes. He held you tighter kissing the top of your head.
"It's not your fault. We'll talk about this later okay? Right now you need to focus on getting better." His voice was calm and reassuring, making it easier for you to let go of the tension that had been building up between you two.
When you felt stable enough you looked up at him, a small smile forming on your lips. "Thank you" you whispered. He smiled back at you, his eyes filled with love, "Anything for you, Sweetie. "
⋆。‧˚ʚ ɞ˚‧。⋆
You were out on a date, enjoying a quiet dinner at a candlelit restaurant. Everything was peace and perfect ,however,season changes wasn't easy for you since you were asthmatic and you were having hard time,dealing with it.
So that's why when you were middle of admiring the view something triggered your asthma, causing your chest to tighten.
Panic flashed across your face, and you fumbled in your bag for your inhaler.
Zayne knew you were asthmatic so he was always ready ,carrying medicine just in case. So when he noticed your distress he quickly took over, pulling out the inhaler from his coat pocket and helped you use it, steadying you as you took deep breaths.
"It's okay, baby, just try to take deep breathes," he said, his voice calm and reassuring. You leaned against him, grateful for his quick reaction. Zayne held you close, waiting for you to stabilize.
Once you felt a bit better, he guided you out of the restaurant, you walked at a slow pace, giving you time to catch your breath. "Do you need to go home?" he asked, his hand gently rubbing your back.
You shook head, "No, I think I'm okay now. I just need a moment." He nodded walking you to a nearby park, finding a quiet corner with a bench. You two sat down, and he held your hand, watching as you took slow, deep breaths. "We can just sit here for a bit, then we can head home if you want," he murmured softly
You smiled, leaning head on his shoulder. "Let's just stay here, I feel safe with you." Zayne wrapped his arm around you, pulling you closer. You sat in silence, the soothing sound of the night filling the air.
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©loveanddeepspaceimagines 2024
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im-so-tired-sorry · 1 year ago
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Cramping
kiribaku x gn!reader
cw: reader experiences periods, mentions of blood, swearing, and pet names
a/n: ending is lowkey rushed but idrc at this point lmao
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
you were in the kitchen cooking with your boyfriends. you three were making a stew that consisted of various meats and veggies.
it was truly a three person effort.
you three would walk around the kitchen for items that you needed and you would each kiss the shoulders of the other two if you happened to walk behind them.
but of course, in couple-y fashion, it turned into teasing and you guys had to mess with each other; you would purposely bumped into your partners and kirishima grabbed at tickle sensitive spots as he walked by. but bakugo would just keep cutting veggies.
that is until you bumped into him enough times, catching you laugh from him side eyeing you.
he grinned and grabbed a kitchen towel and when you caught your breath from laughing, he whipped it at you lightly, hitting the lower part of your stomach.
all of a sudden, a twisting, piercing pain stabbed you internally. you took a breath through gritted teeth, but you couldnt resist to crouch into a ball while holding the lower half of your torso.
of course, your boyfriends crouched to your side as soon as they saw you in pain.
“katsuki!! how hard did you hit them!!!?!?!”
“i didnt hit them that hard! i barely used any force!”
“well you clearly did if theyre in this much pain!!”
“it wasnt that!! it wasn’t that, i’m just cramping that’s all!!”
“oh”
“oh”
“OH”
“well good to know you’re not pregnant.”
“katsuki! baby, what do you need right now. pain killer? heating pad? water?”
“to, fuck, to lay down.”
and with that, your partners went to work. kirishima carried you to bed to allow you to stay in your curled up position. once in bed, bakugo made you drink an entire bottle of water before allowing you to lay down, placing another bottle on the nightstand and passing you your heating pad.
your boyfriends helped you get as comfortable as you could, all while checking on the stew.
“you need anything else?”
with a yawn, you answered, “a nap. i think the cooking got me a little overworked.”
“and over heated,” kirishima said as he felt your forehead, “don’t worry love. we’ll finish cooking and i’ll try to sneak some in so you don’t have to get up-“
“hey! no eating in the room! especially any kind of soup. cause i know your clumsy ass will spill it on our sheets.”
you giggled before sensing blood flow through yourself from the added pressure. seeing you in the uncomfortable state sent worry to your partners, but you brushed it off and they left you to sleep.
you woke up a couple hours later to the sky in a darker light. you were in less pain now, but there was still a lingering tension below your stomach. it didn’t hurt, but it’s never a comfortable feeling.
you heard the bedroom door open slowly. “babe. you awake?”
“mmmm”
“tch, i’ll take that as a yes. sit up, i brought you food.”
“i thought there was no eating on the bed.”
“do you want it or not?”
slowly and still a little groggily, you sat up and katsuki handed you a bowl of warm stew as he sat next to you. the stew ended up really good, with the veggies well cooked and the meat tender.
“how do you feel?”
you shrugged, not just as an instant response but because there really was no way to explain it.
“is there anything i can do?”
“take this feeling away.”
he sighed and wrapped an arm around you. “sorry to break it to you, but i can’t, no matter how much i want to. what i, and eijirou, can do…is try and support you through this.”
you finished your stew and rested your head on his shoulder. “that’s more than enough.”
“katsuki!! i finished loading the dishwasher. is there anything else before i start it?” you faced the door where your giant boyfriend came in and leaned against the doorframe. “hey baby. you feeling ok?”
you shrugged in response.
“i’ll take this,” bakugo took the bowl and stood, “I’ll put this in the wash.”
you sat at the edge of the bed to grab your water bottle. after you took a drink and put it back on the nightstand, you noticed a pop of color on your light colored sheets where you were laying last. you gasped in surprise, realizing you stained the sheets with blood. you caught you partners’ attentions while they were both at the door.
“what happened?”
“nothing!”
“are you hurting again?”
“no! i mean kind of, but no i’m fine!”
“did you stain the sheets?”
you opened your mouth to deny, but you knew you wouldn’t be able to get away with it, so you shamefully looked away.
“oh baby,” kirishima walked up to you and held your face in his hands, “it’s ok! we just have to wash them and they’ll be gone. no need to be ashamed either, it’s natural.” he gave you a kiss on the forehead.
“i’m gonna put this in the dishwasher and then come up to change the sheets. eijirou, do you mind starting a shower for them?”
“of course i don’t mind!”
a shower was a good idea. just to have a sense of cleanliness.
eijirou prepared the shower for you, and as soon as the water was warm enough, you hoped in. after a proper rinse, you dressed comfortably for bed.
returning to the bedroom, you noticed the darker sheets over your boyfriends already in bed. katsuki was reading his book and eijirou was on his phone, each putting their item down as soon as you entered.
“ready for bed?” kirishima asked with a dorky little smile.
you nodded, excited to rest with your partners.
before getting into bed though, katsuki made you drink more water.
you snuggled in between your partners as they cuddled around you, making sure you were comfortable and that they weren’t squeezing too hard.
and with that, you three fell asleep.
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opal-owl-flight · 4 months ago
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We've...won. What comes after, but to live?
Grandfest is giving me so many feels both as a player AND for my sploon plots. Holy shit. Im so, so happy that I was here to experience it. I missed out the last two fests. But not this one!!!
This fest made me have actual fun playing the game again. I was spending most of it vibing even in the middle of matches (but still doing my part dont get me wrong) -- even when I lose I dont get upset!! Bc the vibes were just that immaculate!!
Heres to more!! I may be team present, but I cant wait to see whats next!!!
Anyway. That aside. I cant stop thinking abt how 3 feels about all of it.
They easily win most fights, but a 333x in those top ranking matches is a FEAT, even for them!!!
Theyre there on the stage, getting their commemorative pics with their old team.
Just like old times.
And the crowd's going wild around them. The lights, the sound, the music in their hearts.
The smiles of 4 and 8 in the crowd, catching their attention. Octavio and Cuttlefish standing side by side near them. Octarian, Inkadian and Splatlandian crowds, all in harmony with the current song. A victory in many fronts -- theyre assured even that the salmonids they have contact with are thankful for their help in stealing most of the eggs back.
Theyre glowing, they feel warmth, unlike any other theyve felt before. Its as if its burning whatever melancholy that usually hangs around them.
Theyre smiling. Even in front of everyone they cant help but smile and laugh and cheer over such a hard-won victory on all fronts.
And yknow whats killing me?
Theyre thinking...theyre thinking with confidence, with strength behind the thought. A thought they havent thought of for a long, long time.
I want to see more of this! I want to live long enough to see this grow!
I want to BE here!
I want to live!!!
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*Lil design note: winners of 100x and 333x fights get a commemorative tattoo after the victory. Its up to the player if they want it to be permanent or not. 3 chooses to keep it permanent, so theyll be reminded of this day.
This day where they had a taste again of their life before it was taken away from them. This day where they were allowed to live, to rest, to just have fun.
Its to remind them that even deep in the trenches of their duty, they had a day like this. And they will have more of it, as long as they hang on.
**They still...regress at times, when they feel the weight heavy on their shoulders. But theyre not completely hopeless. They usually just need to be sat down and be given tenderness for a while. Be assured and reminded that theyre not the monster they believe themself to be.
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ghostlyvoidshark · 4 months ago
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Could you do some rival Headcanons between epic and cross sans fighting over us? Like every second you cannot breath, each of them trying to one up each other to show who would treat you better. This idea has been floating in my head for a bit, so just wanted to finally request it. (Also, can we be gender neutral? And romantic, obviously) Thank you and have a good day/night! :)
Hello hun! Sorry this took me a little while - I've had to work more than normal recently. But THANK YOU FOR THE ASK!! I thi k this is my first from a non-moot so im so excited to be able to write this for you! I hope you have a lovely day / night as well :D sorry if this isnt that long, im trying to get some confidence in my writing lolol
Epic & Cross x Reader
Cross doesn't like fighting Epic since they are pretty close but this doesn't stop him from getting competitive.
Epic, on the other hand, loves play fighting and competing with Cross! He's not aggressive about it, he just does it for fun.
Cross is usually trying to prove himself worthy of your affection in some way while Epic just likes flirting and making you laugh.
Epic is surprisingly good at flirting but often settles for making you laugh because he loves it so much.
Sometimes Epic flirts with cross too just to fuck with him lmaoo - Cross is always baffled and a mess when it happens. Its pretty funny to watch tbh.
Most people assume youre a polycule. Epic doesnt help dispel that with his flirting. I mean a poly relationship could probably work.
You will never know alone time again if you don't set those boundaries. They're both Clingy!!
Given the chance, Cross will escort you everywhere - hes like your own personal bodygaurd. (You dont know how he knows your schedule so well or how he finds you so easily when going out.)
Epic also shows up a lot. Hes usually the one initiating lunch & dinner dates between y'all. Well, its not obvious theyre dates but they basically are, lmao.
They do try to one up each other but you'll next to never see them fight. You may catch them bickering about who did better, though. Epic likes instigating and Cross can be sassy.
They may have a fight about you once. Other than that they are chill because they're so close and Epic often gets Cross to communicate.
The fight would probably be mostly on Cross. He would get mad that he fell for someone his best friend likes. He would be upset that he "couldn't have someone himself" both because he feels guilty about Epic and for personal issues (he's lost a lot). Then he'd be mad that he thought that way and felt jealous. He wouldn't like how selfish he feels. Epic talks him through it, though. And talks some sense into him :]
Cross may be quiet most of the time but he is hanging around more often than not. He's just sort of ... supervising lol. Its comforting in an odd way. He likes the quality time too.
Sometimes Epic gets you alone, though. He gets you two to do relaxing things together like a picnic or video games.
He can be surprisingly tender and romantic but he will ruin it with a joke after surprising you or flustering you with the romance so cherish the moment while you can. Good luck, too. ;P
Cross is a mixed bag. One moment he's purposely suave and dashing then the next he cant get a sentence out . Its like he has moments of clarity then goes back to being a dork.
On a few occasions they will team up on you. I don't think they would really plan it unless it was your birthday or something special like that. When they do it it's usually just an accident and their moods synced to cause chaos.
When they team up they are menaces! Epic would be all gentle and romantic with flirty, witty remarks while Cross would be the type to guide you by the small of your back, leaning in to tell you things. And you know he'd be saying stuff like he's your personal knight! "I'll always be there for you." || "if you ever need anything just come to me, I'll take care of you." And shit like that.
Augh they would have you cornered but like in a good way. Cross always behind you, making sure you're safe while Epic leads you around by the hand. I hate them. I actually love them damn it.
Sometimes they get needy and steal you away for a while. The dorks.
Epic "kidnaps" you to cuddle up somewhere and read or watch a movie. He's very touchy (respectfully) so if you're okay with it he will be all over you. He especially loves it if you act as his weighted blanket and lay on him.
Cross gets grouchy and takes you somewhere on an "adventure". Most of the time it'll be somewhere without people. If the place has rough terrain he'll likely try to convince you to let him carry you lol. "You got it?" / "you tired?" / "want help?" Any reason to be close or touching you if you'll allow it.
If you're more of a low and mellow energy person he'll set up a special spot where he sets up stuff for one of your hobbies (if he can) somewhere hidden and will hang out with you.
Stars forbid you give only one of them a gift. They won't guilt you or be mean, but they will rub it in the others face subtly. If they're the one who didnt get something then Epic would jokingly act all clingy and pouty while Cross glares at him. Speaking of, Cross would stand closer than normal and Low-key pout if he didn't get something. Like a cat who wants something from you.
If you're the more affectionate, touchy type then you're going to likely always have one of them touching you if they're around. Epic practically hangs off of you while Cross just has a hand on you somehow. They have probably scent marked you, accidentally or not. They just clingy bois.
Also - not in a kinky way - but Cross has a high chance of biting you during prolonged physical contact lol. It's just a quirk of his. Its like cuteness aggression but in a loving way. You can think of it as kisses it a way.
He wouldn't mention it if you dont but it is a good way to fluster him >:3c
As for trying to be better than each other i think they would choose some things you like and try to be "the best" at it?? Like... lets say you collect shells. Suddenly they are finding great shells - in tact and pretty - and giving them to you. Same with trinkets. Or finding weird coffee mugs if you like those.
Epic also is that bitch who has a lot of money and just sugar daddies his friends LMAOO. You want that expensive thing? Dont worry bby hes got it kcjsbsbsb. If hes crushing on you it just gets worse and more ridiculous.
Cross is the one who has dedication to getting you things. So if something is about timing or searching hard for it he's the one to go to. He also just brings you random things like a bird..?? You dont even know where he gets half the stuff he shows up with. You may even just find stuff on a table in your house randomly.
Also, for no apparent reason, kareoke becomes a thing between y'all. You have no choice /j
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nightlyrequiem · 4 months ago
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hello there :] hope ur well!
could u possibly write some hcs of Valeria with a tattoo-ist (?? idk wtf theyre called) s/o? I feel like it would be sweet for Valerias girlfriend to help touch up her tattoos!!! (or forcibly etch 'el sin nombre' into a targets skin ..)
or like, imagine Valerias girlfriend tattooing Vals initials into their thigh? Or a subtle hint to Valeria, like a little scorpion tattoo? Asjjsjsjskk wholesome wholesomeness!!!
i ask u to add a little sprinkle of nsfw .. have that interperated as u will, i wont tell u what or how .. but just .. do it 😈 nyehehhehe
I ask of readers prns to be either fem or gender neutral (Valeria is for the gals, i refuse to believe otherwise)
stay peachy!! 👽
Hi :) I am just dandy, thanks. Hope you're doing well too! That sounds like a fun dynamic to write about
Don't worry about the pronouns, you'll never catch me writing Valeria with a man. She is a lesbian. It's canon, she told me so herself
Valeria with a Tattooist S/O
Most of Valeria's tattoos are thanks to you. She had a few done when she was younger by a few different artists but ever since meeting you she will only let you ink her. It's important to have a relationship with your client. You two certainly have a good relationship.
You did all of the tattoos on her left arm. She has one tattoo that says Lillu or Lilto, I genuinely can't remember but I saw someone else a few months ago figure it out. The name was of a goddess of power I believe. I'm genuinely tweaking because I can't remember. It's a really cool detail though. You did that. You should be very proud of yourself.
When Valeria was eighteen, she got a really dumb drunk tattoo, a tramp stamp. Something stupid like a pig. She thinks it's supposed to be a pig anyway. The artist did a terrible job. You had the fun job of covering up. A little scorpion, as is her self-acclaimed symbol. You gave yourself a matching one high up on your inner thigh so she can see it while she eats you out.
That isn't even the only tattoo you've given to yourself attributing her. You aren't supposed to tattoo your partner's name on yourself but it's Valeria. Why wouldn't you want her name on you? You'll just have to never break up, which is fine with you. You got her name tattooed right under your left breast. Right (More of an approximation.) where your heart is.
You tattoo her men too. They make up most of your clientele and are quite respectful. Not like they have much of a choice. It's no secret who you belong to, and they know if they don't act right, they'll have hell to face. You still overcharge the ones you don't like though. A few times Valeria has made you tattoo her little nickname onto the foreheads of the traitors she didn't kill.
Here's where things get kind of freaky. Valeria gets a little turned on by the pain. She can hardly wait for you to finish up inking and cleaning the tattoo before she's pushing you into the chair and having her way with you. You don't mind at all. Seeing her skin still red and tender after having a needle repeatedly pushed into it does something for you as well.
Also, she grunts when getting tattooed. Just going to leave that here. Imagine it how you will.
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dazed--xx · 4 months ago
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💘When Hearts Collide💘
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Member: Non-Idol! Hyunjin x Reader
Word count: 9.9k +fake texts
T/W: angst, mentions of puberty, stereotypes of male and female friendships, teasing (friendly), Underage drinking (PLEASE BE CAREFUL wont say don't do it in my culture its pretty accepted if its a sip or two), jealousy, mutual pining, suggestive behavior but no smut (Theyre minors...like ill imply or mention that they've had sex or not cause their age range is 16-17 years old which is over the age of consent if its with another minor in the same age range but as a 26 year old I wont be writing teenagers having sex just seems odd to me), mentions of suicide but like in a joking way, arguing, Jungkook is legit voice of reason character. anything else that could potentially be a trigger.
A/N: wow i actually like loved this story and I was such a bitch about it. man the "groups chats" gonna love this one.....lol but nah fr I really appreciate the requester for this. i legit wrote it every chance I got these past few days so I hope you enjoy it. Also I might do another one from Li-Rin’s perspective cause it might be really cool and good too do
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Can men and women be just friends?
Y/N thought so, for many years, she held her best friend Hwang Hyunjin close to her heart. Seeing him as more of a chaotic twin brother than a romantic partner. They had met at the tender age of 5 years old in kindergarten. She could remember it like it was yesterday when he extended the half-eaten candy bar to her as she wailed about not having a snack. His bright doe-eyed smile as he helped her wipe her tears. The soft pat on her back as she nibbled on the candy. She hadn't realized how this small interaction would develop into the most important friendship of her life.
Y/N will admit, unlike the other girls, she hadn't noticed Hyunjin was a guy until her second year of high school. While plenty of girls in middle school would fawn over him, she never really saw the appeal they had when it came to her best friend. This was the boy she saw cry for hours when his favorite anime was cancelled and he screamed like a final girl when he was tossed into her pool by her older brother. He was the kid she spent her summer nights in a tent collecting fireflies and telling ghost stories with. She saw him throw up on Choi Soojin when they kissed at a birthday party in 6th grade, and cry like a girl when Kim Mina broke up with him to date his friend in 7th.
How could she ever see him as a man?
She would have sworn that she never could if he didn't disappear the summer between the first and second year of highschool. Dance camp was what he had told her when he finally could answer her calls. His voice was deeper than it normally was and Y/N shrugged it off, not bothering to think much of the explanation until she saw him. That's when she realized it wasn't only his voice that could change when he hit puberty. Though she had developed before she started high school, she forgot the changes that came with puberty. No longer did her best friend have a chubby-cheeked baby face, his features were much more defined. Y/N wasn't sure how to handle the way her heart raced when he smiled at her. The way he ruffled her hair before wrapping his arms around her waist and pulling her into a tight hug.
Y/N felt her cheeks heat up as her breath hitched in her throat. She hugged him back after a moment, before quickly trying to pull away from him. Her eyes avoided his as she continued to rack her brain for some kind of explanation as to why she had felt that way toward her best friend. While she had, had a boyfriend before, he never made her heart flutter like that. She was surprised when she felt Hyunjin's grasp on her waist tighten as he inhaled burying his face in her neck. "Where are you going? I missed you a lot, let me hold you for a second" He whined. She knew her face was a bright scarlet at his words. How could it not be? Her heart was pounding against her chest. "I-I missed you too but I don't want to be late..." She stammered shyly as she went to pull away from him again, this time turning away from him and he kept his arms wrapped around her waist letting his chin rest on her shoulder.
A pout sits on his lips as he stares at her "When did class become more important than me?"
"Will you be able to make my mother not be on my ass about college?" Y/N questioned as she raised her eyebrows as she tried to pry his arms from around her waist. "Stop treating me like a creep let me hug you I haven't been able to annoy you for almost three months" He groans. Y/N shakes her head as she palms herself at his words.
"You are a creep if you hold on to a girl without her consent"
"You're a girl?" Hyunjin asks in disbelief his hands resting on her waist as his eyes travel from her face down her neck, his teeth involuntarily taking his bottom lip as his eyes linger on her chest and hips for a moment. Y/N rolls her eyes at his words not noticing his wandering eye. "I can remind you if you'd like..." She teases playfully. Hyunjin's eyebrow raises in amusement for a moment before he shakes his head to himself before letting her go.
"How's that?" He whispered in her ear. He pressed his chest against her back, and Y/N turned her head to face him. She bats her eyes at him flirtatiously. "Wouldn't you like to know?" She teased as she scrunched her nose at him and walked toward the entrance to the school. Their sophomore year continued with flirty touches and whispers filled with unofficial infatuation. But they were still just friends and nothing more in Y/N's eyes. Nothing too different than normal teasing between best friends, they didn't really mean anything by it.
Right?
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The summer proved to be confusing.
While she spent her days either with Hyunjin or at her part-time job, she found her eye wandering in her best friend's direction more and more. She found herself more excited to be at work than hanging out with Hyunjin the more summer went on. The close proximity she and Hyunjin typically kept when they hung out seemed to become overwhelming for her for some reason. Her friend, Li-Rin, swore she was developing a crush on him. Y/N could remember vividly how adamantly she denied the claim.
How could she have a crush on Hyunjin? It's Hyunjin...She never thought she would see him that way, and how could she? They've always been closer to siblings, so much so that their birthdays were separated by only a day. She never once thought that she would feel her heart flutter when he smiled at her. Nor had she expected her cheeks to turn a bright crimson every time he leaned in close to watch a video on her phone or when their finger brushed as she handed him something. She hated it honestly, how could she be one of those girls. She needed time away and felt picking up more hours at work would help her clear her mind and figure out how she felt about him. Spending that time away was helpful but she couldn't avoid him when she got out of work. He was practically part of the family, due to his living at the sharehouse her parents rented out to her and her friends. Her parents adored him and always invited him to holidays.
Y/N thought the party Li-Rin invited her to would finally be her escape. A way for her to get away from Hyunjin and her confusing feelings for him and clear her mind. Maybe even meet a cute boy in the process. But the moment she saw that familiar onyx mop of hair and lanky build with a petite brunette on his arm, she felt her comfort completely extinguish.
How could he be everywhere? she wondered as she made a beeline for the kitchen to indulge. The cluster of colorful glass bottles that sat beside the sodas drew her attention as she reached for a clear bottle with a red seal around the top. "Vodka....You sure that's a good idea?" An unfamiliar male voice questions from behind her. She groans in frustration as she turns to the person "Is that really your--" Her words are trapped in her throat as her eyes meet his. He's almost like a work of art and you weren't talking about the tattoos that littered his right arm.
He chuckles with a smirk as he raises his eyebrow in amusement. "Wow...You're actually speechless. I've never had this happen to me before" He comments. She shakes her head pulling herself out of her trance as she grabs a red solo cup, "I-I was caught off guard..." Y/N murmured twisting the cap off the clear bottle. The guy stares at her worriedly as she pours a large amount of vodka into the cup filling it almost halfway showing her inexperience. "Woah.. that's probably not a good idea" He warns as he tries to grab the cup from her.
Y/N's movements are faster than his as she quickly tries to drink the whole thing but the moment the stinging liquid hits her throat she feels herself gag. "Yup. That was probably a bad idea...." The stranger nods as she coughs at the burning sensation in her throat. She felt the stranger pat her back, comfortingly as she coughed up her lung. "I'm Jungkook by the way" He states sarcastically "You know? Since I have to take care of you now" his lips curl into a flirty smirk. Y/N groaned at his words "Nah, I'll be okay.." His eyes widen for a moment as she goes to walk away from him and embarrassment fills her gut. The lack of experience with alcohol made her body tingle with warmth, the room felt wavy. "W-wait!" Jungkook calls as he grasps her wrist. She stares at his hand as if it was a foreign object and he pulls his hand away.
"Sorry, but you just took a lot of alcohol to the head...you should probably sit down." He states as he lifts his hands in surrender. You stare at him with nervous curiosity. "No funny business and I'll just help you to the couch." He states calmly.
"Why?" She questioned nervously.
"You looked like you didn't know what you were doing when you were trying to get something to drink. I mean you clearly didn't even know that even for a heavyweight that was way too much to drink all at once.." He confesses.
"So what? You're some knight in shining armor or something?"
He chuckles at your words. "Nothing like that. Just want to make sure a pretty girl doesn't get taken advantage of or hurt herself because she didn't have someone to help her learn how to drink" Y/N smiles kindly at him as she accepts his offer.
Maybe she could get over Hyunjin...
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It had been a little over an hour and Jungkook being the nice guy he was, he didn’t leave Y/N’s side.
The room no longer spun as she and Jungkook talked about everything and nothing at all. Y/N regretted not being a couple of years older, losing any chance to get with him when she told him her age, and as much as she wanted to forget about him; Hyunjin and his little friend wouldn't leave her mind. What were they doing? She wondered. Who was she? His new girlfriend?
Jungkook playfully taps the rim of his cup on her forehead. "You still in there?" He questions with a chuckle. Y/N smiled as she rolled her eyes at him. "I'm sober now, you know?" She replied brushing over her spacing out. Jungkook raises his eyebrow in amusement "Really? Wanna take a couple tests to prove it?" Jungkook questions with a smirk as he rests his arm across the back of the couch adjusting himself to face her. His free hand reaches out for her chin taking it between his forefinger and thumb as he examines her features. Y/N gives him a look saying 'Are you serious?'
Jungkook nods at her, smiles, and brings his hand down as he notices her relaxed state. "Not completely sober but tipsy, so that's better than before," he says calmly. Y/N was about to say something when someone sat between her and Jungkook. Y/N's eyes widen as she recognizes her best friend, who sloppily leans on her shoulder.
"Baby..." Hyunjin whined as he wrapped his arms around her waist. Y/N sighs as she's greeted by the strong scent of liquor. "Hey, Jinnie..." she coos soothingly. Hyunjin's face lights up as she rubs his back. She gives Jungkook an apologetic look and he gives her a reassuring smile as he lifts his beer toward her before taking a sip. Y/N giggles at his gesture and Hyunjin looks between the pair. His eyes burned holes into Y/N's cheek. "Who's he?" Hyunjin slurs before leaning into Jungkook's face "Who are you?" he questions, a hint of bitterness in his tone. Y/N grabs Hyunjin's sleeve tugging him out of Jungkook's face.
"Sorry, Jungkook oppa...This drunkard is my best friend" Y/N apologizes as she gives Hyunjin a warning look, who stares back at her with a look of disgust as he feels jealousy filling his stomach. "Oppa? Since when have you known each other?" He questions, his tone laced with annoyance. Jungkook answered him this time, "Met Y/N earlier tonight, She was....experimenting and it backfired" He chuckles.
"Was I talking to you?" Hyunjin questions as he gives Jungkook an annoyed look. Jungkook's eyebrows raise in amusement "You're talking about me and in my vicinity, Best Friend Hyunjin" Jungkook's tone is playful and sarcastic as he begins to find amusement in Hyunjin's reactions seeing how red his face turns. Hyunjin scowls at Jungkook as he goes to stand up before Y/N grabs the sleeve of his hoodie.
"Sit." She grits. Hyunjin gives her a look of disbelief, his mouth hanging open partially. "But bab--" Y/N holds her hand up, cutting off his words. "No, apologize...he's our sunbae and he helped me out a lot tonight" Y/N explains. "You're drunk, Jinnie..." She gives him a look of concern as she caresses his cheek lovingly. Hyunjin leans into her touch for a moment before nodding, with a guilty pout. He turns to Jungkook, bowing politely "I'm sorry, I-I've been drinking and I was rude..." He mutters reluctantly. Jungkook gives him a reassuring smile "Don't worry about it, I've done way worse"
"You want me to bring you home, Jinnie?" Y/N asks worriedly as Hyunjin reaches for her hand, taking it into his as he leans on her shoulder and begins to play with her fingers, trying to stop the room from spinning. So cute...Y/N thinks as he pouts as he tries to snuggle into her. "Come on, Let me bring you home." She coos as she stands up. Jungkook helps lift Hyunjin off the couch and escorts him outside. "Y/N, you aren't driving right?" Jungkook questions worriedly. She shakes her head, "No, thank god our share-house is only a 5-minute walk so I didn't drive." She states as the crisp autumn air kisses her skin. Jungkook sighs in relief "You need me to help get him there?"
"No, trust me I'll be fine"
Jungkook doesn't protest as he leans Hyunjin back against her and she lifts his arm over her shoulder. Hyunjin immediately wraps one of his arms around her waist pressing his chest against her back, his other arm wraps around her shoulders and he nuzzles his nose against her temple. "Hmmmnnn..." He sighs "So pretty...."
"Thanks, Jinnie but lets get home, 'kay?"
"Why didn't you tell me you were coming?" Hyunjin questions as he continues to cling to her; making their walk a lot harder than it needed to be. Y/N shakes her head "I don't have to report to you, but I also didn't even know I was coming until I just did" She shrugs.
"I would have come with you. we could've had f-fun together though baby...I wouldn't--i wouldn't feel so worried...right now" He slurs as he tightens his grip on her waist. Y/N raises her eyebrow "Worried? Why?" Hyunjin just shakes his head "You don't get it... you won't understand..." He whines his voice cracking as he rests his head against the back of hers.
"When don't i understand you?"
"Always! you always ignore everything I'm trying to do and think I do things for stupid reasons like because I'm your best friend!" Hyunjin shouts. Y/N feels surprised at his declaration as she tries to hold onto his arm. "What are you talking about?" She questions as she feels him rest his chin on the top of her head. "hey! I'm not your crutch stop, you're heavy" Hyunjin ignores her as he stops their movements hugging her tight.
"Why did you have to be with that guy? Why not me?"
"Jinnie, what are you talking about?"
"That guy! Why were you with him? How long have you known him? Is he your boyfriend now? He's not, right?" Hyunjin slurs his voice full of worry as his grasp on her tightens. Y/N shakes her head "No? I just met him, I drank too much and he helped me sober up. Besides Jungkook oppa isn't interested in a minor, he's 5 years older than us" She retorts. Hyunjin lets out a sigh of relief as he loosens his grip on her and leans in kissing her temple. "Good...you should be mine. Not anyone else's" He mumbles into the kiss.
"God, how much did you have to drink?" Y/N questions. "Not a lot in the beginning..." Hyunjin slurs and Y/N raises her eyebrow, turning her head so she can face him. Her cheeks heat up as the corners of their lips touch and she pulls away slightly.
"And after the beginning?" She asks her voice laced with concern.
Hyunjin hangs his head "I was gonna pace myself, I know I should b-but--why were you with him?" He asks again cutting off his own explanation due to his intoxication. Y/N felt unease settle in her stomach and a subtle sense of guilt. "I just told your drunk ass that I drank too much earlier...Thank god I'm sober enough for this right now" Y/N groans as she tries to get Hyunjin to continue walking but he stands his ground and holds her in place. "Why were you all over him then?" He questions, pain and jealousy laced in his tone.
"I was drunk...you're all over me right?"
"I could be..."
"You are...." Y/N rolls her eyes at his ignorance. "No...not the way I wanna be...can I show you?" He whispers as he presses himself against her. Y/N goes to turn to look at him to scold him, his hand moves from her waist to her cheek as he leans in and presses his soft lips against hers. Y/N's eyes widen as she freezes, Hyunjin's eyes flutter closed as he groans against her lips. She hesitantly responds to his kiss, letting her lips move against his for a moment. She felt her heart swell as he kissed her deeper his tongue brushing over the entrance to her mouth. Y/N goes to pull away, her sobriety making everything seem way too overwhelming.
"No.." Hyunjin whines as his lips chase hers and he turns her around so she is facing him. "Taste so good...don't make me stop" He slurs. His drunken state is more obvious and Y/N can pry herself away from him. "You have to. I need to get you home and you're being a pain" Y/N pouts as she takes his hands in hers comfortingly. Trying to brush over his previous actions, her heart raced a mile a minute as he furrowed his eyebrows. His angelic features looked completely flushed and she felt her guilt grow stronger.
"Kiss me..." Hyunjin whines as he takes his hands from hers and holds her face as he leans in, brushing his lips over hers. Y/N leans back and hurt flashes across Hyunjin's face. "You're drunk..." Y/N reasons as she grabs his wrist finally able to get him to start walking back to the sharehouse. "So?" He questions with a pout.
"I'm not kissing you when you're drunk..."
"I'm not a girl..."
"Being a guy doesn't make it consensual, especially not when you're this drunk. you still don't have a solid mind to consent to anything so don't make me a pervert."
"You just did..." He murmurs as he trudges behind you. Y/N sighs in frustration at his brattiness. "You kissed me, which I will be overlooking because you're what?...say it with me here, Drunk" Y/N jokes but it sends a painful shock straight to Hyunjin's heart.
"So if I kissed you sober? Will you stop me then?"
Y/N freezes for a moment. Her face heated up. "You won't..."
"I want to..." Hyunjin confesses as he reaches out to caress her hip. “If I try to, will you let me?" Y/N raises her eyebrow in amusement. "You'll have to try and see..." she replies, trying to sound nonchalant but flirty. Hyunjin leans over her shoulder, his lips brushing against the shell of her ear.
"You think I won't?"
"You've never shown interest in doing it before," Y/N giggles, trying to lighten the mood as she grows nervous. Hyunjin scoffs, "That's a lie. We kissed at Nam Hyunjoo's party." A look of frustration sits on Hyunjin's features as Y/N shakes her head.
"That was 4 years ago, Jinnie, and a dare" She retorts as she sighs in relief as they finally walk through the gate of the share house. Hyunjin trudges behind her "It doesn't matter it happened..."
"Yeah, Yeah. go to bed" Y/N waves him off as they enter the house. Walking toward the couch she sits down allowing her muscles to finally relax; her head rests against the headrest. Hyunjin places both of his hands on the back of the couch as he leans over her "Stop doing that, Let me kiss you now" He whines as he leans in closer and Y/N leans forward for a moment brushing her lips over his teasingly before shoving him back by his shoulders and gets off the couch opting to escape to the sanctity of her bedroom.
"Sober up first" She states with a wink as she disappears up the stairs.
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Y/N thanked GOD that Jungkook helped her out the night before, completely avoiding a hangover and being able to make it for her shift today. The fast-paced environment of the diner on a Saturday morning, the hectic and ridiculous amount of tickets, and not enough coffee to go around. But even in the chaos, Y/N finds herself grateful to find her mind occupied with something other than Hyunjin like it had been for the past 12 hours. She didn't sleep a wink, her heart in her stomach from the moment she went upstairs.
The ghost of his lips lingered on hers. She had a hard time remaining in her room and not taking care of her best friend, but his persistence in her kissing him made her feel butterflies rise in her stomach. She had a hard time accepting how much she enjoyed it, it was Hyunjin; He was her best friend. They'd kissed before, how could it feel so different when he kissed her this time? How could everything be such a mess? She had drifted off into a restless slumber in and out throughout the night until she had to get up for work at 4:30 am.
From the moment she opened the doors, she no longer had time to think about anything but breakfast items and coffee orders. As it began to slow down, she heard the familiar chime from the bell. She greets the customer as she wipes down the counter. "Take a seat anywhere.." She instructs them kindly as she turns around and is greeted with a familiar face. Jungkook stands there with an amused smile and another guy next to him pats his shoulder as he walks toward the bar. Y/N sighs as Jungkook presses the bell, she notices him leaning over on his elbow and he waves playfully giving her a teasing look.
Grabbing a coffee pot she walks over to the pair, a service smile on her lips as she stands in front of them. "How can I help you today?" She asks, professionalism laced in her tone. Jungkook smirks and raises his eyebrow "Half a cup of vodka" He teases. Licking her lips, Y/N looks around for her boss. "Go fuck yourself" she retorts when she doesn't see him nearby.
Jungkook places his hand over his chest as he scoffs in faux offense "And here I came to check on you and everything..."
"No, you didn't. you literally said you were gonna harass me at my job last night"
"Damn, thought you'd be too drunk to remember" Jungkook chuckles as his friend scrolls on his phone completely uninterested in the conversation. "Speaking of being too drunk to remember, You have a hard time with your friend?" Jungkook asks as he flips the mug in front of his friend and himself over and gestures for her to give them coffee. Y/N complies filling both of the mugs as she shakes her head trying to avoid talking about Hyunjin too much. "Nah, it's not the first time he's been blacked out. Kinda always his caretaker" She shrugs. "Are you gonna eat too?" She asks as she pulls her pad out of her apron, clicking the pen. Jungkook raises his eyebrow "Is it free?"
"Broke College student meet broke highschooler" Y/N snorts as she waves her hand in front of her, gesturing toward herself. Jungkook rolls his eyes before scanning over the menu placed in front of him.
"Can i get a bacon egg and cheese bagel?" Jungkooks friend asks and Jungkook nods along with him. Y/N writes their order and goes to enter it in the POS. She feels a tap on her shoulder and turns to see her manager standing there. "Sir?" She questions puzzled.
"Go on your 30 after you put it in, Hera's gonna cover you" He states calmly before turning away from her. Not needing any more instruction you quickly finish entering Jungkook's order and clock out for your break. Walking toward the break room, she stops in front of the lockers grabs her phone, and walks out the back door to get fresh air. Turning her phone on it comes to life with messages from Hyunjin.
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Y/N felt her cheeks turn a bright scarlet as she read the pet name. How could such a simple request make her heart race so much? How could she be feeling so excited to go home now? The memory of their kiss lingers in her mind. Brushing her fingers over her lips for a moment before she realizes her behavior. Her eyes widen as she quickly brings her hand away from her lips.
Oh Fuck....She likes Hyunjin.....
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Y/N didn't know how to handle her epiphany.
The more she spent with him, the more her feelings seemed to blossom. She felt her eyes searching for him and her heart racing faster when he called her name. Even when the school year started she figured her heart would finally settle now that they were in separate classes and they would only see each other in passing due to her cram school. But she should have realized how persistent her best friend could be, he and Li-Rin rarely got along besides a few tipsy interactions and taking care of the other hungover self until Y/N was available to take over. To say she was surprised to see the pair now getting along swimmingly would be an understatement.
Due to Li-Rin's budding friendship with him, Hyunjin no longer breaks away during lunch and would come with Li-Rin to hang out with them. Every once in a while, he and his friends would disappear for who knew what and Y/N would finally gain the ability to breathe again. She sometimes dreaded these days when Hyunjin needed to be extra clingy before going to his class in the morning. How should she keep trying to play things off how she normally would? For years she would have brushed off his flirty remarks and clingy actions but now she found herself reciprocating. She knew how dangerous this could be, how crossing the line with him beyond a drunken kiss and flirty words could ruin everything they'd built over the years. But as the weeks continued to go by she found herself not caring as much as she once had.
She finds herself feeling more and more eager at the idea of giving in to her emotions and just confessing to Hyunjin. What could be the harm? He was her best friend for a reason. They understood each other on a level no one else could reach. "Y/N, Li-Rin" Hari calls the pair over as they look around the cafeteria. Y/N smiled feeling a sense of relief as she didn't see Hyunjin and his group of friends seated at the table. Walking over to where Hari was seated, Y/N smiled at the 3 other girls who gave her a friendly wave. "Y/N, Hyunjin finally let you off the leash?" Sol-i teases as Y/N sits beside her. Rolling her eyes Y/N chuckles softly "So I'm a dog now?" She raises her eyebrow. Hari giggles as she joins in on the teasing "I mean with the way you two cling to each other you'd think they're married" The girls laugh at the joke.
Y/N feigns disgust "You realize he's just my best friend right?"
"Is that why you guys made out at the party Friday?" Hari questions with her eyebrow raised and Y/N feels her heart drop into her stomach.
"What? What are you talking about?"
Hari rolls her eyes as she leans in closer "I saw you guys, completely sucking face right down the street from Felix's place" She giggles and Y/N's eyes widen as she begins to stammer in a panic "W-what? N-No. No, it wasn't--we weren't sucking face it was just a kiss." The girls gasped "So, it's true?" Li-Rin questions, an unfamiliar look on her expression. Y/N looks at her for a moment "Hyunjin was blackout and feeling clingy so he kissed me. But it was just a stupid kiss, that Hyunjin probably doesn't even remember so it doesn't matter." She argues trying to change the subject. "You guys should totally go out, you guys would be cute" Aera comments cheekily. Y/N groaned in response as she hid her face in her hands.
"Can I just die right now?"
"Why? Because you LOOOVVEE him?" Sol-i teases.
"No, because you guys are embarrassing" Y/N states as she softly throws a fry at her. "Don't get mad at me because you like him"
"N-No, I don't" Y/N lies, trying to keep her feelings private while she tries to work them out. However, She feels a real relationship could possibly work out with Hyunjin. She wouldn't want to ruin any chance she had by involving her caring and loving but nosy friends in the mix. Y/N felt herself grow anxious as Ji-Rin's face lights up at her refusal. "You don't?" Ji-Rin asks her eagerness for the same answer evident and Y/N complies. "N-Not like that. H-He was drunk so..."
"Good." Ji-Rin sighs placing her hand over her chest as if she's relieved. "So, what's everyone gonna do tonight wanna study at my place." She asks trying to change the subject, Hari's eyebrow raises and the other four's eyes meet each other as they feel an awkward tension settle over the group.
Before Hari speaks up "Nah, put that shit in reverse and park it. The fuck do you mean good?" She challenges. Ji-Rin gives her a puzzled look "What do you mean?" she questions with a confused pout her head tilting to the left side slightly.
"What I just said. What do you mean good? Do you like Hyunjin or something?" Hari asks with shock and a defensive tone. Ji-Rin smiles giddily as she covers her face with her hands. "Maybe~" Ji-Rin replies "Kinda..." Hari scoffs and crosses her arms over her chest as she goes to say something to her, Y/N kicks Hari under the table as she notices Hyunjin and his friends making their way over to their table. "But--" Hari tries to argue, and Y/N turns her head away from Hari "Not the time."
"This looks intense." Hyunjin's friend, Jisung comments as he raises his eyebrow in amusement. Y/N gives him a kind smile "No, Missy, why do you look so grumpy" Jisung questions as he ruffles her hair and sits beside her and the rest of the guys go to sit down. Hyunjin stands behind Jisung with his eyebrows furrowed as he stares between the pair, jealousy fills his stomach. "Hyunjin, there's a seat here" Li-Rin calls him gesturing for him to sit beside her, his mouth hung open for a moment wanting to protest but in the end, he slumped his shoulders and trudged over to the seat beside Li-Rin. He grumbles something under his breath toward her and she rubs his arm comfortingly as she whispers something to him and he nods with a sad pout.
An uncomfortable feeling fills Y/N's stomach as she stares at the pair, when did they get so close? Hyunjin said they had gotten along a little easier after Y/N had left her to watch him; but could things have gone further than a friendly understanding being built? Y/N tried to focus on the conversation Jisung had dragged her into but with Li-Rin's previous confession, Y/N could not drag her eyes off the pair. She felt betrayed, how could Li-rin do this to her? No matter how often Y/N denied it, there was a reason the girls always made jokes about her and Hyunjin being together. Li-Rin could see her closeness with Hyunjin, even if she didn't have feelings for him, liking Hyunjin would be crossing the line for any of her friends and they knew this.
Li-Rin was a newer addition to the group, Y/N had met her in her first year and they quickly hit it off. Y/N's longest female friend, Hari, always held a small dislike for Li-Rin. Sol-i and Aera held a neutral stance never showing her disdain but also never getting too close to her. Y/N was the one who trusted her wholeheartedly and accepted her.
how could she like Hyunjin?
Was she messing with her? She had to be. It had to be a joke. How could Y/N confess to him if her friend likes him? That would be so cruel to Li-Rin, no matter the line crossed Y/N wouldn't stand in her friend's happiness. Li-Rin didn't choose who to like, these things just happen. If anyone understood that it was Y/N, but why did it have to be now? Why couldn't it be last year? Long before Y/N really understood how she felt about him and she wouldn't feel like she's being a terrible person if she were to confess. Now that she knew Li-Rin liked Hyunjin, Y/N felt panicked as she watched the way he smiled at her while they talked. While he kept a small distance between himself and her, Y/N could see some form of a connection built between the pair. It left her unsettled as one question lingered on her mind.
Does Hyunjin like her too?
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Y/N felt herself panicking during her cram school.
Hyunjin went to study with Li-Rin and Jisung. She felt herself growing nauseous at Li-Rin confessing before Y/N could talk to her about her expose at lunch. She watched the clock as the time continued to drag on. It felt like an eternity as she watched the clock a minute away from 10:30 pm.
As soon as her cram school ended, Y/N quickly made her way to the bus stop and pulls out her phone to text Li-Rin.
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As she reads Li-Rins last message, Y/N feels her heart sink into her stomach and she drops her phone as if the device had burned her. Looking around in embarrassment hoping no one saw her, she quickly grabs her phone off the ground in front of her as the bus pulls up and she gets on. Walking toward the back of the bus she sits in a seat in the second to last row, leaning against the window her mind races,
What did she say?
Y/N read the message over and over again, hoping it would change. She felt bile rise in her throat as she contemplated what to reply. She wasn't sure what to do. How should she respond? What could she do? Was being a good friend saying yes? She wasn't sure if she even wanted to. How could she set the guy she likes up with anyone, let alone her friend? She felt tears prick her eyes as she struggled to find an answer as she felt someone tug on a strand of her hair.
Chalking it up to an accident Y/N stares out the window at the bright lights of the city. She almost loses herself in her emotions when she feels the person behind her tug on a strand of her hair again. Feeling irritation swell in her gut she turns around to cuss out the person. "The hell is your--Jungkook Oppa?" She questions her eyebrows scrunching together in confusion as the older male sat there with a mischievous smirk. "Finally you notice me. You know you're quite elusive" He comments with a chuckle. "I tried to say hi when you sat down but I don't think you heard or saw me"
"And you thought harassment was a good way to get my attention?"
"It's fun to annoy you. You look like crap though what's up?"
Y/N rolls her eyes at his comment "Cram school. Why do you always seem to piss me off every time I see you?" Jungkook shrugs as he shifts to sit next to her. "What's up though? Cram school sucks but it doesn't usually make you cry." He questions worriedly. Y/N crosses her arms over her chest and shrugs. "Nothing...Just stupid stuff I guess." She groans. Jungkook shakes his head "Every problem seems like the end of the world at your age but if you talk to someone older they usually seem small" He tries to convince her to open up as he bumps her shoulder with his.
Feeling her resolve crumble to dust, Y/N rambles "Ugh, It's nothing--just you remember my best friend?"
"Vividly"
"Well, my friend said she might like him and ever since the night of the party I've been freaking out because he kissed me and I liked it" She states as her speaking speeds up slightly "But I never used to like him like that before so I wouldn't have cared if my friend liked him before but now I do like him so I do care that my friend likes him" Jungkook stares at you blankly. "Jesus fuck I think you gave me a stroke trying to keep up with all of that" Jungkook jokes as he rubs his temples. "So what you're saying is you and your friend both like Hyunjin?"
"Yeah..."
"Okay? and why is that your problem?" Jungkook asks seriously raising his eyebrow. Y/N's eyebrows furrow in confusion "What do you mean? We both like the same guy, that's wrong..."
"Who told you that?" Jungkook questions with a puzzled look on his face. Y/N stares at him dumbfounded and he sighs "Look kid, there's nothing wrong with you both liking the same guy. It's how you both handle it that will determine if it's wrong to like him or not. Does she know you like him?" Y/N shakes her head "She asked me but I just figured out how I feel so I told her no, but it's cause I thought I would have time to figure out what to do"
"Then you can't be mad at her for anything. You lied so you should fix that first, then you should tell him how you feel and let him determine who he wants to be with before you girls go fighting each other." Jungkook advises.
"She asked me to help her go out with him....am I a bad friend if I don't do it?"
"You are if you lie to her about it" Jungkook shrugs as he sighs "To be 16 and only worry about stupid shit like this again" He states in a wishful tone. "You aren't that much older than me" Y/N comments. Jungkook lifts his hand placing his index finger over her lips as he closes his eyes "Shhhhh....I'm reminiscing"
"Well, Ahjussi, you said you went to Seoul national and lived on campus right?"
"Uh-huh, why?"
"Cause we're driving past it" Y/N points out the window and Jungkooks eyes snap open as he jumps up from his seat staring out the window before he pushes the button signaling a stop and it pulls to the side of the road when it can. Y/N stifles a laugh as she covers her mouth with the back of her hand. "You're embarrassing Oppa" she comments.
"Shut up! but remember what I said" Jungkook waves her off as he rushes off the bus.
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Jungkook was right....
It was childish to expect for friends to not eventually like the same person one day. It's a normal obstacle while growing up and people can't control who they develop feelings for. Is what Y/N told herself, but for the past two days every time she saw Li-Rin and Hyunjin together; she wanted to put her head through a wall. It didn't help they were paired up for a project in their class and the time they had spent together doubled as Y/N's time with him dwindled more and more.
While she still occasionally was able to hang out with him in the mornings and at lunch, something felt different about their interactions. They were distant and withdrawn and it felt odd. Y/N wasn't used to not having her best friend cling to her. But for the past few days, she couldn't remember the last time Hyunjin had any physical contact with her. Y/N found herself drifting off into thought as she sat at a table in the library, Li-Rin asked her to study with her earlier in the day and Y/N felt the need to talk to her about her request.
Y/N struggled to find a way to bring it up. How do these types of things usually go? What was it Jungkook said again? She contemplated as her mind went a mile a minute. Honesty. start with honesty she sighs to herself.
"Li-Rin...." She gasps. And the girl perks up lifting her eyes from the textbook "What's up hun?" Li-Rin gives her an innocent expression as Y/N feels her heart sink into her ass. "Uh, S-so you remember what we talked about the other day?" Li-Rin gives her a confused look "What? Hyunjin?"
Y/N nods "Well i wasnt exactly honest with you guys"
Li-Rin shrugs "Kinda figured..."
Y/N looks at her lap in shame "I'm sorry but I don't feel comfortable setting you up with Hyunjin." Li-Rin's eyes widen in surprise "Woah! no it's fine, we already talked and are hanging out alone Friday and stuff" She confesses almost as if she is rambling. Y/N feels her heart stop "Oh? Y-You confessed?"
Li-Rin looks around, a look of panic on her features. "Uh--Y-Yeah...sort of..." She states as she nervously looks down at her textbook, mumbling something under her breath. Y/N's blood runs cold "O-Oh..." she stutters as she bites her lips hesitantly.
Li-Rin looks at her apologetically "Y/N..--Don't let this get in the way of our friendship okay?" Y/N cuts her off as she chokes back her sadness and gives her friend a reassuring smile. "You said you sort of confessed so, I'll take a step back and if he officially says yes to you then I will work on moving on." Li-Rin feels guilt eating away at her. "I'm so sorry, Y/N..."
"Don't be. If he says no to you, then I'm gonna confess...it won't be right after and I'll be there for you wholeheartedly, and you'll still feel complete support from me no matter what okay? But I do think that, if he says no to you, then I deserve to have a chance to see if something could work out between us.....because with our history I really think it can..." Y/N confesses. "So, I'm going to be a bad friend for this one time and this one time only, because you surprising me with your feelings like that wasn't fair, I hope things don't go as you planned and whatever you plan on doing a bird poops on your head while your confessing and he laughs"
Li-Rin gives her a bewildered expression "A-are you alright in the head? You want a bird to poop on me when I confess? What if I'm inside?" Li-rin questions teasingly.
"Then I hope you fall....wait no that's mean no I don't. umm" Y/N struggles to think of something bad enough that she could laugh at her friend but not too bad she could be hurt. "I hope you pee yourself" Y/N exclaims excitedly. "Shhh" The librarian whispers in her direction and Y/N hides her face in her textbook as Li-Rin stifles a laugh.
“You’re an idiot”
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Y/N felt her face fall at Hyunjin's obvious anger toward her. It had been two weeks since Y/N and Li-Rin had talked. while Y/N wanted to support her two friends' budding relationship, she felt nauseous and annoyed whenever Li-Rin and Hyunjin appeared together. Why not me? She'd wonder Why couldn't it be me? She felt guilt rising in her stomach. She had been avoiding him for longer, something about this year had changed her. Y/N didn't understand, before the idea of not talking to Hyunjin would be painful but since she had spoken to Li-Rin; talking to him hurt the most.
How was she supposed to move on? How could she be with someone else when, to Y/N, no one else could compare?
She couldn't handle it, and in the nature of honesty, she had kept her feelings for him to herself. Though every day she felt herself struggling to refrain from just marching into his bedroom and confessing. A snap in front of her pulls her out of her thoughts. "Polynomials are frustrating but not that much, which means you're not paying attention so you owe me 5 bucks" Jungkook states sarcastically. Y/N's eyes widen "5 bucks?! We agreed on a dollar"
"You weren't paying attention for 5 minutes"
Y/N gives him a look of disbelief "You took my job! You should know I'm broke." she exclaims. Jungkook shakes his head as he wipes the counter, raising an eyebrow at her "I'm literally working, tutoring you, and reading your texts at the same time" Her mouth hangs open as she goes to argue and Jungkook places his finger in front of her lips. "Shhh. Thank you, Jungkook"
"For what? Being nosy?"
"Being smarter than you"
Y/N rolls her eyes as Jungkook gives her a knowing look. "Don't okay? Hyunjin and I aren't your business" Jungkook snorts as he tosses the rag over his shoulder. Leaning back against the prep line "From where I'm standing there is no Hyunjin and you." Y/N shakes her head as she lifts her math textbook. "Not what we're supposed to be focusing on" She states as she gives the book a gentle tap on the counter. "You got distracted first" Jungkook puts his hands up in surrender. Y/N sits there, staring up at him expectantly and Jungkook raises his eyebrow "What?" he asks crossing his arms.
"Come on out with it..."
"Out with what?"
Y/N gives him a look saying 'Are you serious' with a tilt of her head. "I can literally see you trying not to combust. Holding back from just giving me advice because you know you're too damn nosy" Jungkook scoffs holding his chest in offense. "First of all missy, I'll have you know that you should feel lucky I care enough about you to be nosy." he narrows his eyes. "Oh thank you, I'll appreciate all the gold produced from your touch...."Y/N mocks. She jumps in surprise as she feels a sharp sting on her forehead as Jungkook retracts his hand away from her face. "Did you just flick me?" She exclaims.
"Anyway, why are you here with me, studying math when you could be with the guy you're in love with?"
"Because you'd miss me too much" Y/N smiles and Jungkook rolls his eyes "As much as I appreciate your presence, soul-sibling, I've known you for like 4 months at best and even I know that's bullshit" Y/N groans and covers her face in her hands. "Ugh, I just don't want to see him all over Li-Rin." Jungkook shakes his head giving her a disapproving look "If it was gonna bother you this much then you shouldn't have told her you'd support her if she confessed"
"You act like I knew it would bother me this much!"
"Is that why you haven't clarified our actual relationship to him?" Jungkook raises his eyebrow. "I'll tell him..."Y/N trails. It was Jungkook's turn to give a look of 'Are you serious?' "When? When he and Li-Rin stop hanging out?" Jungkook quips and Y/N smirks "Exactly"
"Bullshit! You're a minor that shit aint happening with my name"
"I'm kidding, Jesus old man take a joke." Y/N scoffs as she closes up her textbooks. Jungkook gives her a stern look "Clarify it or stop coming around me" Y/N's mouth hangs open in disbelief and Jungkook shakes his head in response "Don't give me that look missy. You not clarifying that we only see each other in a sibling way, makes me seem like a pervert." Y/N furrows her eyebrows in frustration "Can't I just make him jealous a little bit? I never insinuated that we like each other"
"No. I'm a fucking adult, Y/N. That's petty kid shit and honestly, you're above it too. You told Li-Rin you'd support her so keep your word or go to her and tell her how you are feeling about it." Jungkook shuts down her suggestion firmly but his tone held a caring concern. "Why do you have to be so annoying?" Y/N scoffs. Jungkook's eyebrow raises "Because I'm right?"
"Yes..." Y/N grumbled as she rested her chin on her hand looking away from Jungkook. "Stop avoiding your best friend too. It's stupid and gonna hurt his feelings. You already hurt him and pissed him off. Do you want to do more damage?" Jungkook lectures and Y/N rolls her eyes. "You do know you're not my real brother, right?"
"Really? You harass me like you're my sister though?" Jungkook scoffs as he shrugs "I mean, it's nothing for me to turn the register back on and cash this out"
"Okay, raising the white flag...hurry up so you can bring me home" Y/N raises her hands in surrender as she gestures for him to mop the kitchen. Jungkook rolls his eyes and shakes his head grabbing the mop
"I should've called out..."
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One second....All it takes is one second for a calm peaceful day to turn into a storm.
Y/N sat in Jungkook's passenger seat feeling her drowsiness kicking in as he drove onto her street. The radio was playing some random playlist from Jungkook's phone, but Y/N felt herself finally relaxing for the first time in a while. Her mind sat free of worries and stress as she stared out the window. She felt excited as Jungkook pulled into the driveway. "wow you weren't lying..." Jungkook quips as he parked the car. "You really run a share house with your parents?"
"They come to manage it but they live like 10 minutes away in the same town as Hyunjin's parents. I usually decide residents after background checks since I live here and right now it's just me and Hyunjin and one other guy that's like always at work but he cleans up after himself and doesn't bother anyone so"
Jungkook shrugs as he nods "Want another tenant?"
"And live with 3 guys? I'd rather you hit me with your car." Y/N retorts. As the pair hears a knock on the passenger window, Y/N jumps in surprise. She turns to see an upset-looking Hyunjin peering into the car and she opens the door slightly. "Jinnie?" She questions "What's up?"
"Who is he?" Hyunjin asks as he stares directly at Y/N accusingly and she raises her eyebrow in confusion. "I'm Jungkook, we act--Was I talking to you?" Hyunjin cuts him off and Jungkook snorts "We've gotta stop meeting like this Hyunjin." Hyunjin narrows his eyes at Jungkook as he raises his eyebrow at him "What's that supposed to mean?"
"I'm not fighting a child. I'll see you tomorrow, Y/N" Jungkook waves Hyunjin off as he holds out his fist for Y/N, who returns his fist bump and exits the car. Y/N stands there as Jungkook drives off and gives him a wave. Hearing a scoff from behind her she rolls her eyes and turns to her best friend. "Jinnie,--no. I'm pissed right now. like are you dumb or just oblivious?" He cuts her off and Y/N stares at him confused. "Hyunjin, what are you talking about?" A figure sitting on the stairs draws her attention, Li-Rin gives her a guilty smile and waves and Y/N looks back at Hyunjin even more confused. Why was Li-Rin here?
"Why are you spending so much time with that guy?" Hyunjin questions. "Like, can you not see that it's bothering me? How long do I have to sit there and just deal with this shit? What do I have to do to get you to look at me? Be your best friend? Support you in everything? kiss you? Oh wait, I've done every single one of those things, and still! still, I'm not enough for you? What is it going to fucking take, Y/N seriously" His voice growing more and more erratic as he stares at her with desperation on his features. Y/N feels her heart race at his rant, what does this mean?
"J-Jinnie...I didn't realize it was bothering you so much. but I don't know w-where this is coming from..." Y/N trails "You're more than enough for me. I don't understand?" Hyunjin groans in frustration "Can you seriously not tell I like you?" Y/N feels butterflies in her stomach her eyes widen and her cheeks turn a bright scarlet, but just as soon as she feels her excitement, guilt replaces it. Her eyes drift over to Li-Rin and she feels Hyunjin's hands encase her arms "Fuck Li-Rin..I'm talking to you!"
"Wow...Thanks dude" Li-Rin retorts sarcastically.
"You know what I mean!" Hyunjin snaps at her "Why are you still here?"
"Jisungie told me to be nosy" Li-Rin quips as she leans back on her hands. Y/N stares at them puzzled. As Hyunjin turns to her "Go home. It backfired and I'm not in the mood right now." Y/N furrows her eyebrows as her ears perk up. "What backfired?" She questioned as she stared at the pair. "Nothing...Li-Rin just agreed to help me and it didn't work" Hyunjin grits as he scowls at Li-Rin who scoffs "It was a stupid plan. How am I supposed to pretend to have a crush on you when I'm dating your friend?"
"Jisung did fine...." Hyunjin argued.
Y/N feels like a bucket of ice was poured over her head. Li-Rin pretended to have a crush on Hyunjin? To help him? Y/N couldn't help the feeling of betrayal that welled up in her chest. Tears burned in her eyes "Y-You guys made a plan?" She questioned in disbelief, her voice just above a whisper. Hyunjin looks at her with guilt in his eyes "I-It wasn't anything bad I promise you...I just wanted to know if you felt the same way" Y/N ignores him and stares at Li-Rin "Am I a joke to you?" taking a couple of steps so she is directly in front of Li-Rin and Hyunjin grasps Y/N's arm pulling her slightly back "Its not her fault..." Y/N shoves his hand off her as she steps back in front of Li-Rin and nods waiting for Li-Rin to answer.
"Of course, you're not a joke to me..."
"So you're expecting it correct?" Y/N asks and Li-Rin nods. Y/N brings her hand across Li-Rin's cheek harshly. "Y/N?!" Hyunjin exclaims in shock as he pulls her back from Li-Rin, who stands up and waves him off "Don't.....I deserved that" Hyunjin shakes his head "No, this is my fault I'm the one that asked for help" He argues to Y/N. Y/N looks away from him as she rolls her eyes "She's a big girl that can make her own decisions." Li-Rin nods as she pats Hyunjin on the shoulder. "See you tomorrow, Y/N" She waves as she walks down the street.
Hyunjin and Y/N stood there in silence for what felt like an eternity before anyone spoke. "Baby,--oh you thought you were pissed." Y/N cut him off and Hyunjin's body deflats. "You manipulated me..."
Hyunjin's eyes widen in a panic "N-No, it wasn't like that I swear" He stammers as he steps closer to her. His heart sinks as she takes a step back "Y/N..." She sighs at the dejected tone in his voice. "Jinnie, Just-just give me a second okay?" she states as she takes a deep calming breath. "Can I ask why you couldn't just talk to me?"
"You always think I'm joking or drunk or bored.." Hyunjin pouts. "How could I ask if you liked me like that? You always said I'm your best friend so I never thought you'd look at me like that" Y/N sighs as she rubs her hand over her face. "We're dumbasses....just straight-up fools I swear" She mutters, and Hyunjin raises his eyebrow in confusion "Huh?" "Nothing, we just both are stupid people who forget the other is our soulmate. Jinnie, of course, I like you that way, how could I not? You're literally everything I would want in a guy" She confesses as she goes to walk inside to bring the conversation out of the cold before it dawns on her "Hold on," She points as she turns back to Hyunjin with a quizzical look "You said I always think you're drunk or joking" a panicked expression flashes across Hyunjin's face.
"You were drunk that night right?"
"I--Well, you see what had happened was..." Hyunjin trails and Y/N's mouth hangs open as she closes the front door. "Nope, you stay in the cold until the conversation is over now. Hwang Hyunjin, I swear to god if you made me basically carry you home and you were almost completely sober I'm telling you now that I will disown you" Hyunjin shakes his head "Was tipsy at best I promise" He puts his hands up in surrender. "Wasn't as drunk as I made it seem 'cause I wanted to kiss you and you always let me when I'm drunk" Hyunjin explains cautiously. Y/N rolls her eyes at him "So you're manipulative? You realize that's a giant red flag right?"
Hyunjin nods "I'll be color blind if you do..."
"You already know, basically born that way" Y/N jokes with a shrug and Hyunjin rolls his eyes at her as he wraps his arms around her waist. "So, we are like, dating now right?" Hyunjin asks as he rests his chin on her shoulder. Y/N shrugs as she doesn't respond pretending to contemplate her answer. "Babyy~" Hyunjin whines as he begins placing soft pecks along her neck. "Don't torture me" Y/N shakes her head and turns around wrapping her arms around his neck "So don't ask a stupid question" She retorts as she scrunches her nose at him.
Hyunjin gives her a small chuckle before pressing his lips to hers engulfing her in a passionate kiss. Their lips danced together before Y/N pulled away "I knew you'd be a better kisser sober..." She joked
"Shut up...."
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taglist: @yangbbokari @lovesunshinefelix @tr-mha-fan @threeopossumsinacoat
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dragonstailbutch · 7 months ago
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Hey sorry i am trying to like. find examples of what you mean when you talk about mra stuff and (trans)misogyny in forcemasc content and tumblr search has betrayed me once again, can you explain?
(sorry I normally wouldn't ask but I wanna make sure I'm not perpetuating anything!! Also fucking tumblr search!!! it is ridiculous!)
so ive been sitting on this ask for months since ive got it. i want to do it justice and try to take it at face value that its being honest in asking.
The thing is, theres this trend and a weird amount of effort to be like force femme, to be forceful and like its something to fearful of and give in to. But we cant do that, cause all that does is reinforce the idea that being a man is a toxic thing. I saw this post the other day where a transman talked about like, the whole "raised as a weapon" thing, the violence and horror of being a man and raised that way versus how they felt growng into it as a transman. How they wanted to reclaim that phrase or something? i could be misremembering.
But that was never the intent of forcemasc. It wasnt actually about being a dude, literally *forcing* someone who was unwilling into masculinity, none of the posts that i made that started the community (and yes i, a transfem butch woman, started and made this community and some of yall need to get over yourselves) were ever about that, it was intended to be a soft mimic or even a call to forcefemme.
i was all about making it soft and tender for a reason, cause if i didnt i was only reinforcing the toxic masculinity narrative, "men fighting in the mud" "men are dominant and cool" " to be a man is to be forced into masculinity and to be disgusted with the feminine" or whatever. When masculinity isnt about just men, and being butch isnt just being masculine. masculinity should also be sensitivity, not domination. i wanted it to be better, show a better side of what masculinity could be, what being butch is.
Ive spoken before a bit too, about the tags people used and added to forcemasc, and really maybe i was wrong in ever naming it forcemasc. people used and still use tags like autoandrophilia, autoandrophile, androphile, autogynephilia, androphilia, and autogynephile. Ive seen so many people with urls and tags and posts calling themselves transandrobros, literally calling themselves MRAs, as if that was something to be proud of, as if they dont understand that they arent fighting for their and our rights, they're fighting for cis-mens rights by using those names and terms, not transmascs/transmens rights. I can understand ignorance, but weve talked about how the words you use have history, especially those like the tags i mentioned and androphilia and androphobia and others, all of them have roots in deeeeeeeply misogynistic and transphobic people and history.
Literally all of these are awful and are phrases that arent and wont be reclaimed because theyre history is one of pain and hurting trans people, one of coercive 'help', literal forced detransitioning and reinforcement of MRA and terf narrative that men are both good and the worst creature alive and that to be a woman is to be disgusting and the purest thing all at once. That to be a transwoman is sick and we shouldnt be trusted.
Im trying to be very kind, not scream and rage, not because i dont desperately want to, but because if i do, as a butch transwoman, ESPECIALLY cause i claim being butch, people wont listen to me no matter how much of what i say is meaningful. one of the reasons why im doing this NO, instead of in anothr day or two, is that im coming to terms with the fact that the situation will just get qorse, not better without words.
Part of why im still sane is that ive gotten a couple asks here and there about how my posts and creation of the community has helped them and its so wonderful to see that, genuinely so amazing to see people recontextualize and love themselves. its wonderful and im so fucking happy about it.
i personally made this space so i could love myself, who i am as a trans person and my body, and i knew that other people needed and wanted that for themselves too and i wanted to help, share this love with more people. That to be hairy and chubby and masculine and butch was a nice thing. But to me it feels like it was coerced into being a thing for Men. A thing no longer for me or people like me who share the butch culture and name to no longer enjoy cause people unfamiliar with kink and tran history have decided that masculinity and butchness are the exact same thing. Id say people should go be a bear, but you wont learn their culture either and thats cruel and insulting to bears.
We deserve better You deserve better. Stop falling for the lies and hate. We beg you
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