#THERES SO MUCH DETAIL THAT GETS LOST IN SUMMARIZATION

[racingmiku2018]

would u mind telling the masses (me) about ur dnd campaign (i want 2 hear about pokemon dnd...)

omg yes always i love talking about our dnd campaign (using a readmore to prevent dash clogging) (also sorry for not getting to this in a timely manner tumblr keeps eating my notifications)

so the working base of our campaign is the pokemon mystery dungeon games, where you play as a pokemon on an exploration team at wigglytuffs guild. things are fine and normal until some asshole starts stealing time gears, which are gears that control the flow of time on the little pokemon continent youre on - in our campaign, there are 6 in total. i cant remember how many are in the actual games but it cant be much more than that? when a time gear is stolen from its little area, that whole area (until it hits the working area of another time gear) freezes in time and turns gray, and nothing can move in that grayed out freeze zone. so you go through the game trying to stop whoever stole the time gears and return the flow of time back to its normal ticking.

our party consists of a bard popplio, a time wizard nickit, a blood hunter fennekin/deerling hybrid called a fenneling, and a monk aipom - i play the aipom!

from here we start going into session summary territory and were in a little deep so please bear with the Text Wall 🙏 ill be skipping a lot of the minutiae in the interest of saving some characters bc idk tumblrs text limit but i can go into greater detail later

session one is, as one would expect, the one where all our characters meet and get acquainted, and we sign up for wigglytuffs guild as one team (much to the distress of one of our members, who does NOT want to be on an exploration team) but before we can actually call ourselves guild members, we have to go through a little test dungeon to retrieve a ribbon!

the test itself is easy enough. defeat 3 dungeon feral bidoof (they went down like sacks of potatoes) and go into the back room of the dungeon to grab a ribbon - except some dickhead morgrem managed to weasel his way onto the testing grounds and has the ribbon. he wants money or something better for it so we decide to give him an ass beating, he teleports away after dropping the ribbon, and we retrieve it, returning it safely to our testers hands - he is less than pleased about the state of the ribbon, which is torn and frayed and bloodied because we had to fucking fight for it.

now fully initiated members, we spend the night in the guild and get our first actual job the next day - oran berry collection at a nearby village of caterpie. we blow through the dungeon, where morgrem waits at the very end, eating all the damn oran berries which he probbaly fucking needed bc of how bad we beat his ass earlier, so we beat his ass AGAIN and also i managed to kill one of his little minion impidimps. this is the first actual kill that isnt a dungeon feral. we collect the required amount of oran berries somehow and leave some food for the village (the forest was their only food source and theyre all fucking starving) before returning to the guild with guilt ridden hearts. our guild master goodra is disappointed in how we took all the oran berries we could find, and the guy who tested us, indeedee, is proud of us for getting the amount of berries asked of us despite the circumstances. indeedee and goodra are in love but that doesnt come into play until later.

that night we (by which i mean nickit and fenneling, because aipom and popplio failed a check and missed the prophecy dream entirely) get our first prophecy dream! a shaymin is begging for help at waterfall cave. the next day, a shaymin runs to the guild and begs for help, because the time gear at waterfall cave has been stolen. we arent allowed to go there yet because were level 2 and still extremely squishy, so we have to take a different job beforehand. clearing the dungeon with some difficulty (we got our shit absolutely fucked by a couple of venonat which is extremely funny considering how low level they were in comparison to morgrem, who we almost reduced to a stain on the ground), we get to the end of a dungeon where we meet a celebi! she gives nickit some augury sticks, we deliver the item in the job description, and celebi teleports us back to the guild. as we sleep that night, fenneling makes a pact with fucking kyogre to get stronger, and then we all get pulled into a second prophecy dream - we are shown a bunch of disasters and are told not to trust hoopa.

for reasons, we have a day off the next day, so we decide to finally see whats what with waterfall cave, where we are kinda ambushed by a sneasler who threatened to kill us if we didnt quit the guild. naturally, we beat her within an inch of her life, but she teleported away like the morgrem, and we continued on with the dungeon exploration. at the end of waterfall cave, we meet a meowstic who happened to be part of the cult of hoopa, and he gives us a magic hoopa ring, which our popplio takes and puts on immediately, and the stress of the situation makes aipom hurl. we are then blasted out of waterfall cave by a geyser of water, and wake up in a hot spring.

we head back to the guild, and learn that indeedee has been captured by a big bad named grimmsnarl (i say 'a' big bad bc were like a quarter into the campaign and idk who the biggest bad is yet). goodra is extremely upset about this for obvious reasons. we catch him in time to tell him about the dream, the cave encounter, and the ring, and goodra tells us to please god stop wearing ths ring, here is access to my personal library where you can find wizard spells, i am going to go find indeedee please dont investigate the time gear thing until i tell you otherwise.

so we sleep.

the next day, shaymin rushes back to our guild because another time gear is gone and shit is FUCKED. he begs us to do something because the guilds current plan (which is 'run around like headless chickens in search of indeedee and also maybe the time gear thieves) is trash, so team silly (our team, who hates the name i chose bc i got cornered by a secretary) goes out to investigate.

or we try to, before getting cornered by the secretary vivillon again and given a mission to help a senior team because theyre getting fucking WALLOPED out there. so we go and we take out the cultist pokemon attacking the senior team of 3 poochyena, managing to bag our second actual kill that isnt a dungeon feral, which the poochyena are thrilled about because they want meat and we have just provided a fresh corpse. after saying our farewells to the poochyena, we realize nickit was able to put a tracker on the cultists, so we follow them to their base (which has been left abandoned), trash the place and their teleporter so they cant get back easily, and get clues: one of which says that this cult isnt a hoopa cult, and theyve been framing hoopa as the time gear thief, and another saying the locations of the remaining gears.

we go back to the guild and sleep, and after a very funny dream melding involving eggs and stage fright, we are pulled into a group dream with hoopa! he tells us hes not stealing time gears but we should start stealing time gears just so the big bads cant steal anymore and we stand a chance of restoring things back to normal.

the next day, we head out to a dungeon where a time gear is located, and get curbstomped by dungeon ferals for an hour before getting to the time gear puzzle, which we solve with ease, and now have to fight an aspect of cresselia - not as strong as the real cresselia, so we beat her ass with haste and flee with the gear before the real cresselia shows up. we figure we cant go back to the guild like this, so we run to the next town and are accosted by culists again, who we manage to absolutely murder, and our fenneling eats part of one for some godforsaken reason. upon reaching the next town, we take a ferry ride to the next time gear location (which is a whole fucking nightmare but idk how long the text limit is and we gotta Move) and fall underground, where, miraculously, there is a time gear! so we kill the aspect of tapu bolo guarding it, take the gear, and outrun the freezing zone currently heading right for the town we just left. we have the town evacuate and keep on moving. the entire north part of the continent is now frozen in time, so we head south to the last remaining gear, and the last unfrozen town in the continent.

the town we get to has two things: a bar/inn called club heartthrob, and a monastery. we rest at the bar/inn and spend some time at the monastery, whose abbott arboliva shows us to the nearby dungeon, so we clear it after the party explodes due to popplio having a meltdown in the time gear puzzle room. we then meet the real honest to god enamorous, who guards this last gear, and thankfully we dont fight bc enamorous is willing to talk with us and ascertain our goals. upon seeing that we are really just trying to make things right, she gives us the gear and a little thing to immobilize grimmsnarl (who has the other 3 gears) and sends us back to town, where that fucking morgrem has appeared, pissed off everyone in town, and gives us a message from his boss grimmsnarl saying that hes captured the guild pokemon and will kill them if we dont come to give him our gears.

arboliva gives us a gem that, when crushed, will summon every pokemon at this towns monastery to help us beat absolute ass if we need the help, and we go on our way.

on the way to go beat the fuck out of grimmsnarl, we gain a new party member, joltik, who becomes very useful very quick.

we get to grimmsnarls base, where we save the first half of the guild pokemon, and go deeper in to find grimmsnarl partying and the rest of our unconscious guild members, including popplios band members, goodra, and a half dead indeedee.

we come up with and perfectly execute a plan to shield the guild members until we can wake and unleash them onto grimmsnarls gang summoning arbolivas monastery and like every other pokemon on the grass continent that we managed to save with the town evac, and by god they are Pissed. we destroy grimmsnarls gang with the only real casualty being my aipom that went down like 4 times in the course of this fight, kill the FUCK out of grimmsnarl, and now we have to fill in the guild master about our game plan but we gotta wait until next session because goodra is very occupied with helping his boyfriend. and also our nickit is actually a zorua.

[notedchampagne]

hello. wtf is locked tomb and can you tell me all about it

the locked tomb series is a four part scifi/tragedy trilogy featuring necromancy! its a little hard to quantify because summarizing it depends ENTIRELY on the target audience but it does have broad and expansive themes on love and death and grief and most importantly, the horrors of love.

my bestie quinn summarized it quite nicely over here

if you like romance: the books explore different types of romance and how they will destroy and consume you in different ways. also theres lesbians if that helps

if you like tragedy: i have cried at the end of all three books. it is about how easily you can be consumed by your passions and obsessions

if you like worldbuilding: personally i think the difference between exhaustive worldbuilding and good worldbuilding is that they have the same amount of detail, but good worldbuilding is expressed through the eyes of the characters and not elaborated upon in the narrative. tlt does the latter: its a very fantastic universe that seems almost too confusing to behold at first but the bits and pieces the characters integrate into their dialogue say so much

if you like puzzles: this series made me make a fucking discord channel + use up multiple sticky notes to piece together the plot and stories happening throughout the books. im currently rereading the series in an attempt to make a wikipedia on all the characters from scratch

if you dont like puzzles: im on the dumber side of theory-solving but even if youre lost if you have patience the book does a great job of explaining it all in the end. im very serious. if you have questions they Will be answered you will not be left behind. all the extra background corkboard shit is optional for freaks that want more

if you like humor: i have never giggled so often

if you like milfs / insane older women: theres at LEAST three. get at em boys

[the-s1lly-corner]

ATTENTION TADC FANS!

youve all been waiting, and im finally taking requests for TADC again! apologies for the sudden shut down and dismissal of the requests, but it was truly getting to a point where i was beginning to hit the beginning stages of a burnout; and in order to prevent myself from resenting the media or growing tired of it, i had to take a break.. but we're back! with a few news rules that i urge you guys look into since things are going to be slightly different this time around (not much, only one real rule is added, but still!)

As per usual for these posts, im linking my pinned that has most of the rules that generally apply to this blog, really these posts are just for me to announce that im taking stuff for a fandom, you know?

if youre not new around here, though, you will notice a note within the "i will write section", which is that new rule i mentioned above the cut!

however for those who cannot access the link for whatever reason, here is a summarized list of rules n stuff

Basic rules and boundaries:

all requests must be sent in through the inbox. any requests submitted via comments or dms will not be answered, period. i prefer the inbox because its all in one place and easier for me to keep track of things. dms feel invasive and make me feel pressured, and comments can be lost easily. as well as this, with asks i have the request right there so i dont have to dip back and forth for details on what you want

no spamming, please! while i am deciding to keep anon on i can tell when its different requestors asking for the same thing by chance, and when its the same person sending in the same thing. you will receive a warning once (this alone counts as one so technically you get two), after that your request will be denied flat out

as of 12/14/2023, i am not taking oc readers or readers based off of canon characters. while i did canon characters before, i do not have the means or energy to comb through many character wikis for every request. i do intend on opening character based readers eventually, but as of now it is not possible or efficient. you CAN ask for specific traits or personalities, though, thats still allowed

the new rule i mentioned: the new maximum number of characters you can ask for per request is 4-5. before i didnt see much point in limiting TADC since its just 7 characters but i found that most people asked for full casts, but most requests didnt spark any real ideas for every character; thus really feeding into that burnout i mentioned. any requests failing to follow this rule will be put in the wheel (wheel will have the characters names and it will choose who will be written for the request)

i can deny your request for any reason, usually though it will be for discomfort or for being in violation of the admins rules/falls into what he wont write

What I will Write:

fluff and angst! as well as general headcannons! scenarios are allowed too!

poly, platonic, romantic, ect is fine! any characteristics for the reader are usually fine (ex. child!reader, artist!reader, ectect, obviously for stuff like kid readers it will automatically be platonic)

really most things are fine, if theres anything that makes the admin uncomfortable, he will communicate it!

while technically i do write for it, please be mindful when asking for requests that tackle heavier topics (abvse, self h4rm, ect) and will be handled on a case by case basis rather than being set to a solid standard, as well as taking the admins current mental state into consideration when handling these requests

What I WONT Write:

NSFW or NSFW adjacent requests. no smut, no kinks. i have had people try to sneak kinks past me by trying to mess with wording or by trying to justify it by saying it was intended to be fluff. i do not kink shame, but that wont be tolerated here

no yandere stuff, admin isnt really comfy with it. theres a difference between writing characters that can be very jealous and writing something that is extremely unhealthy and to admins knowledge, demonizes those with mental disorders

as mentioned above, heavier topics will be taken with a case by case basis; however if youre asking for things like abvsive!jax x reader or jax walking in on reader SHing then its a hard no. active stuff will not be written here, however a character who has gone through that in the past is an entirely different story

full on fanfics; outside of special occasion, the admin only writes short little paragraphs and stuff for posts

general ban on basic nono content

On the off chance that you request something that has already been done before, admin will link the post that has your request!

with all that being said and done, go nuts guys! i kind of missed writing for TADC but i had to put me first

[narwhalandchill]

Hello! I saw you mention Childe in labyrinth warriors (hope that’s the right name) when talking about the 4.6 appearance, can I ask you about your thoughts on him there? I didn’t get to play that event- so what I know about it is spotty at best. Just that it’s in Inazuma, had Xinyan I think? And that Childe was there. And the little paper dude. I’m genuinely curious about what insights you gained from the event into his character- and I’d love to hear you talk about Childe more.

(can you believe. when i say. now that im finishing this up. that it got out of hand anon??? uhhhhhhhhhhhh. i mean. at this point this should be expected)

hi!!!! sorry this took a bit, ive been somewhat sick all week and also just now absorbed by the nuzlocke im doing but Anyway. am here now thank you sm for the ask and enabling childe thoughts!!!!!

. readmore bc this Actually got just. unbearably long otherwise JIWDJDWJKDJKWWJDK 😭😭😭😭

so the outline is basically as u said, but like. to summarize it w some particular details mentioned since they Do matter (sorry it got giga fucking long bc i think the full context is helpful for discussing childes parts too lmao). but here goes:

so a mysterious domain has appeared out of thin air on narukami island with monsters spewing out from within into the countryside. now this is an Issue (TM) bc timeline-wise this is still v much the immediate aftermath of the inazuma AQ and the civil war - the nation & esp the tenryo commission rly isnt in ideal shape resource and manpower wise to deal w another crisis like this and it has sara rightfully tense after the initial waves of the monsters were finally forced back. she kinda cant afford to send her men to scout inside the domain (it also kinda. opens and closes and reopens at random which is another issue for potential scouts) but if nothing is done to stop the monsters she must commit to a full on assault to destroy the domain to remove the threat & shes more or less on a timer with that. making it quite the precarious situation for her politically too and not just security wise. (keep this in mind)

how we end up being asked to investigate the place has to do w the. im ngl p convoluted xinyan b plot basically she was invited to a music festival as a performer but it was cancelled so now she lacks the travel permits she needs and getting new ones is Not fast without some inside help. we agree to look for sara so she could argue xinyans case, run into her dilemma w the domain and she agrees to expedit the process if we investigate the place in her forces' stead. (xinyan the civilian tags along for some reason too)

first time u go in, u find the paper dude (kind of an enchanted paper familiar of sorts) aka shiki taishou outside who has lost his memory yet is undoubtedly connected to the domain which is obviously a bit suspicious given the whole. monster spewing into the neighborhood deal. but idk she passes xinyans music vibe check so she argues we should help him recover his memories and in turn discover the truth of the domain along the way.

once we get inside the domain we obviously run into mr. worldwide himself including but not limited to a closeup of his crotch during his introduction for some reason. yeah its been nearly 3 years these things you cant unsee. that and the sending us sausage in his bday mail. like bruh

now childes (as he eventually divulges) in inazuma to look for traces of scara who ran off w the gnosis and happened to stumble into this strange domain with weird vibes. he thought it might be something relevant and waltzed in, proceeded to get locked inside (as the domain shifted) and beat the shit out of all the monsters there all the while having the time of his life bc hes simply built different. bc turns out the place is basically just a full-on sparring simulator for warriors that seems to be running by itself w no one overseeing it ever since the domain resurfaced cue the "pratice targets" aka monsters running wild

dont wanna recap the entire thing in detail but basically. firstly childe kinda improvs another new identity as an adventurer noticing xinyans liyuen attire bc Osial Incident and picking up the awkward energy we have at the realization of. this might be messy if we tell her. and xinyan buys it and nicknames him "red" w/e. so thats why the harbinger thing doesnt become a bigger conflict

he then informs us that all the monsters within the domain turn into torn paper charms when destroyed and that there are "replicas" of shiki taishou strewn about the domain that should restore his power and hopefully memories over time.

so we end up going thru the place helping shiki taishou gather his power and uncover the nature of the place. he kind of has an identity crisis happening bc all the monsters the place is generating seem to imply he was created for some nefarious purpose as a weapon of some sorts (childe says some Very Interesting Things in response as an attempt at pep talk. will get to it).

but TLDR what we do discover is actually that the shikigami/paper magic and the domains functions were basically a system invented after the domains creator harunosuke studied similar adeptal techniques in liyue in order to create the shikigami as these battle partners for samurai fighting against monsters from the cataclysm. these paper dolls could then record and replicate the monsters it and its partner fought in order to train others inside the domain so that inazumas protectors would always be ready to face such a threat if it ever came to be. shiki taishou was created as the "overseer" of this domain and its functions as a training facicility. by regaining his memories and finding clarity in his purpose shiki taishou gains control over the place again and is able to shut down its rogue functions so that it no longer poses a threat. he then promises to improve upon its workings by taking it to dormancy again. sara is relieved that the crisis could be averted without costing her manpower or further resources she doesnt have. yippee

So. yeah that took way too long mb jdwhjwdjdwadwaj but. Childe.

so there are a particular standouts in here in my opinion.

for one that is less like. a characterization aspect but more of a "gotcha" confirmation thats very nice to have is that he explicitly confirms that wherever in the abyss he spent those 3 months at 14, it DID involve places tied to the irminsul and its roots.

fissures between great tree roots u say?????? Inch resting ajax. tell me more abt the trees king.

also this monologue is literally so fucking sexy in general i love his single-minded pursuit of something as like. quintessentially simple as just. Improvement. but bc he has literally 0 fucking chill in his boundless hunger for that one singular ambition it alone is enough to disrupt the gravity of the world around him....... (but we will get to that)

Anyway. another Very good fucking moment from him character-wise is during the 2nd act. where weve spoken w sara about the tense situation after the 1st day of investigation ended w all of us minus childe (who got "trapped" inside the same way a child gets "trapped" inside a free-for-all candy store with all amenities included. he had a blast) getting thrown out and the domain rearranging itself again. and like we go back in once the entrance opens and are even more eager and restless to start figuring things out bc again. sara is on a timer.

and then .

guys im pretty sure theres a twitch emote for this???? something starting with C and ending with AUGHT?

LMAOOOOOO

he reads the shit out of us trying to all "subtly" push for the investigation to proceed so the crisis we are actually tasked to investigate can be solved. like this is literally just Actual 5d chess situational awareness and picking up cues from people around him and honing onto exactly whats stirring up in the undercurrent from childe. basically. he just lays onto us like. ah right. this is probably a big problem for that tenryo commission right? such a problem that theyd even ask an outsider to cover their duties... when thatd never happen during regular times right? a conundrum that could get even more problematic if theres a harbinger publicly around... right? oh my bad my bad haha just thinking out loud bestie lets get back to investigating shall we? hahaha

he is such a smart fucking Bastard oh my godddddd bro is out there smelling the traces of societal unrest and any and all weaknesses in a given governing structure like hes a shark tasting like 0,00000001% blood in the water . professional & supernaturally efficient problem causer everyone. this is what he was hired for . i love him

like. hes SMART guys. and hoyo Knows how to work his intelligence into the writing too its soooo scrumptious man .

and like bro hes being such a fucking menace in here too bc. he couldve kept this observation to himself too. but nooooo he just had to shove it in ur face that we are Not being as slick w keeping him in the dark as we would like to think💀💀 smug ass.

it makes me think abt how many things he actually Notices among the harbingers and all their power plays and schemes among one another but that childe simply keeps to himself bc he has nothing to gain from disproving the assumption of himself as this. gullible and simple-minded loyal warrior harbinger and the person-shaped time bomb we toss at wherever the flames of discord need some help sparking alight. after all, we saw this in arles quest too - how not only did he use our pathetic distraction attempts as an opportunity to fish relevant information on both arlecchino and pulcinella for himself (which i already commented on) but also. the fact that he Very clearly noticed our attempt at distracting her and intentionally helped us out without even knowing anything abt the matter at hand. to the point where even arle makes that Highly pointed comment about it and all but spells out that childe was assisting us on purpose the entire time.

like he is just. incredibly perceptive and so fucking intelligent like especially back in 2.2 where even Bigger of a portion of the fandom (if thats even possible) than today just thought of him as this. stupid fucking baby infant meow meow idiot brainwashed by the tsaritsa and completely owned by zhongli and signora XDDDDDD . seeing this unfold made me so fucking happy abt the way like. yeah HOYO knows what his character is all abt. the fandom can ruin him all the want but the games story isnt going to bend to their will.

Speaking of Which.

The weapon thing.

so as ive already alluded to prior . the entirety of labyrinth warriors despite it highlighting childes intelligence, attitude, priorities and ambitions in a way thats like. genuinely so fucking good and comes off as natural with no forced sounding exposition or backstory dump . mostly got a fan reception more in the way of . waa waa my baby boy is depressed with sigma PTSD 3.0 with DLC because calling yourself a weapon is self dehumanization and it signals he is suicidal and has no self worth 🥺🥺🥺🥺 he got TRAPPED in the EVIL DOMAIN consisting EXCLUSIVELY of all his favorite activities nonstop he must be feeling so scared i need to hug him my babygirl!!!!!!!!!11!1!1

when its like. ah yes. i have never heard of a motif ever before.

bc like as much as i do genuinely consider it something that more or less can be taken at face value as an Aspect of who childe is (not necessarily the whole of it, just another mask true to a part of his self) . it should still be acknowledge that part of the reason why his dialogue (and the event in general) fixates on the notion of being a "weapon" has to do with shiki taishous character arc.

because thats what he is. and is trying to discover what kind of purpose a discarded (bc harunosuke left the domain abandoned at the end) weapon and tool like himself can even have anymore. and childes lines taking that repeated emphasis of. whats so bad about being a WeaponTM (& expanding on what that means for Him) specifically . are as much about himself as they are just an attempt to communicate his worldview to shiki taishou as a way of pushing him towards solving this identity crisis he has . that paper boy literally Needs to solve in order for the domain to stop malfunctioning.

and like. okay even if we just look at it w/o paper boy. so say childe considers himself a weapon . but what does that mean to him?

[incoming top 5 dialogue lines that genuinely fucking challenge my sexuality this is so fucking hot. no one talk to me]

"Only those that wish for an end will find one."????????

"My limits vanish behind the horizon with every step I take"??????

FUCK OFF OH MY GODDDD

like people think of childe as this fatalistic if not actively suicidal then at least like passively reckless and uncaring towards his own wellbeing blood knight w low self esteem barreling towards his death and here he is. using his own fucking words. saying that the mere CONCEPT of an END. is not in his fucking VOCABULARY. because it does not serve his ambition to let such confusions ever obstruct his sights.

people think his purpose and ambition is soooo tied to his family tied to the tsaritsa that if those are ever taken away he will just freefall into the depths of directionless confusion and depression and whatever. when.

Here he is. giving a fucking pep talk to a DISCARDED WEAPON THAT HAS LOST HIS PURPOSE. EXCEPT HE KINDA JUST SAYS ITS A SKILL ISSUE TO EVEN NEED TO CONSIDER AN END TO YOUR PATH (hes silly like that). AS AN UNSTOPPABLE FORCE OF NATURE. A WEAPON THAT CUTS ANYTHING.

oh hey thats funny now where have i heard that before. bonjour my baguettes any fontainian cults or god kings out there interested in the world and fate altering power of unstoppable weapons that can cut into anything even ego and destiny itself and whatever that may mean?????? O____o

i swear to fucking god if the entire time this entire weapon allegory from labyrinth warriors was all about all cleverly n loosely associating him with themes relating to descenders and wills that rival the world all the way back in 2.2. and yet on release all people wanted was to weep for how sad it was he thought himself a weapon. man why is it always like this . i weep for THAT.

like. idk i dont have anything poetic to say abt it other than childes drive as an individual is just fucking breathtaking to me??? its literally Scary how utterly consumed he is by that ambition yet at the same theres this . crystalline clarity he has towards viewing it and himself ?? this weird ass self awareness that coexists with the all-consuming pursuit and ambition of it all??? this isnt sad this is both ridiculously attractive AND batshit insane like dudeeee . and like . the way he talks about it too like this is just a matter of fact everyday thing to him 💀💀 bc thats his abyss shrimp color vision this is how he rolls . its nothing grandiose its just how he is . this is normal to him its unbearable i hate him

like somewhat unrelated here (sorry) but sometimes i see ppl go against the possibility of childe having sth to do w the 3rd descender (which like yes is a crack theory for now and its not sth i can fully align myself with either as of rn Due To Those Thematic Clashes it just lives rent free Because of how conflictingly insane it is while also having some Strangely compelling evidence in its favor) or even just. Any higher predestined significance assigned to him in the grand scheme of things with the sole argument of like . but then everything about Him is worthless bc it wasnt His ambition and His drive to overthrow the world he wasnt Just A Guy (and. sigh. as the op. of that ancient thing. stop taking that old ass hastily typed post too far and too literally thx. its abt the vibe the attitude the subversion. having a destined purpose if the story handles it well does not conflict w being the quintessential just a guy thanks xx). he was just special all along so it all means Nothing and its like. dude. he told a recently-amnesiac paper boy having an identity crisis that its a fucking skill issue to ever falter in the face of some greater purpose haunting in your past or defining your origins. that a True weapon cuts himself free of even that without even a sliver of hesitation . ppl think that if indeed some soul of the 3rd descender is resurrected in story and idk tries taking over his body with past lives and memories or whatever. you think he isnt ripping the essence and existence of that poor fucking dude apart and devouring him alive into the crushing depths of the black hole of an unquechable ambition that beats a steady pulse at His core just to reclaim HIS place as the ultimate weapon to cut through everything???????

aww thats so cute. you guys think even the hypothetical of theories akin to these being legit on some level is automatically going to ruin his arc and character bc hes gonna be taking it lying down!!!!! you think hes going to look at a Grand destiny Assigned to him by someone Outside and Above and not spit in its face!!!

just like his narwhal looked at the destined cosmic end of All life to fall to ruin and immediately devoted its entire existence to denying the universe that very outcome isnt that curious why are they the sam---------------SORRY SORRY where was i at

like. i see how it is for yall. well. myself on the other hand. i have some fucking faith in him lmao

partially . indeed Because. i read the goddamn text of labyrinth warriors. where they let him Talk about what these things mean to him. and how he Truly isnt about to stop. Ever. hes not looking for an end and if presented with one he sure isnt about to respect it. hes just. built different its absolutely amazing

and yeah my bad i got. sidetracked very badly there. you asked me abt labyrinth warriors but bc its childe this is just what tends to happen like my brain fucking spirals. but like . no im not saying that the weapon theme being such a prevalent aspect in the story is like 100% a descender and sword of narzissenkreuz thematic parallel and intentional reference i just think its Quite interesting in hindsight . that This is the angle they drilled in on .

anyway hopefully this at least had Something to illustrate abt why i love labyrinth warriors for how it serves to establish how much of a madman childe ajax tartaglia my beloved truly is . and how to hoyo his outlook towards the world has very much been one of endless limitless hunger and never-sated ambition . and not whatever fanon wants to cook up. childes greatest enemy has always been stagnation and he has always looked towards the Future. of surpassing each and every limit and boundary on his path . like thats what makes him who he is.

also. last lil thing aka. Most Ignored Canon Line Spoken By This Man

which is a shame bc. its so fucking interesting??? i mean. i get that ppl dont know what to make of it bc everyones so fixated on picturing childe as this loyal puppy tsaritsa fanboy who couldnt even deign to imagine discarding allegiances to anyone yet here he is. saying exactly that.

like ive seen ppl be like oh hes trying to Convince himself of this!!!! hes putting up an act!!!!! and its like? no? i dont think this contradicts anything about his character. people just find it uncomfortable because it implies that the things he listed there are not something of any Inherent value to him. which adds up perfectly fine to me but what do i know.

like the way i have always seen this is that it really isnt. oh childe says he isnt actually a loyal person When it matters to him personally and isnt actually invested in fulfilling his duty (as of Right Now, mind you) which would yes seemingly contradict a lot of other things. but really its just that those concepts alone are void to him. you cant stop him from pursuing his ambition by saying its evil. if the tsaritsa ever truly loses his respect and leaves him completely disillusioned in the archon that once was a fellow honorable warrior in his eyes, the concept of "allegiance" will not be able to dissuade him from turning that burning ambition of toppling the heavens towards her throne too. personal respect maybe. a sense of honor. maybe even disdain so extreme that even investing that time into her now is a waste? sure. but like. you get what im trying at? he is way more ambivalent about these things than most people really Want him to be. bc they dont fulfill the hunger that burns at his core.

and it adds up. bc like. his ambition his drive towards battle and bettering himself and becoming a weapon completely unstoppable and irreplaceable that can conquer the world . is his north star. its the singularity that all else about him orbits around. of course silly little concepts like right and wrong will be secondary to that. we just really havent seen a moment where his ambition is in true conflict with the bonds and oaths he has sworn in his current life. but i have a feeling that if and when we do. this line will make a lot more sense lmao

anyway uhhhhhhh

yeah i liked labyrinth warriors!!! very underacknowledged and misrepresented event that had a ton of fun stuff abt childe. i am super normal about these hip and enjoyable aspects of his character as they are explored within this event as the length and contents of this post imply!!!!

omg anon i. really fucking hope u got at least Something u were looking for out of all this KWJKJKDWWJKDWJKDJKWDK i swearrr i just cannot. stop myself from completely fucking losing it on the asks of every innocent anon (and like non anon too why not) approaching my ask box 😭😭

but thank you again for sending this in!!!!!! have a nice day!!!! im very normal thanks for asking!!!!!

[rigelmejo]

Now that I can read a little better I understand a bit more why translations vary so wildly.

Like. On the one hand, if you translate word by word you have so many personal choices to make on which word to use for each thing since there's not many one to one translations. There's deciding to keep idioms or localize them, keep terms and ways of conversing or localize to some degree, etc. And then there's deciding if you cut anything for time it takes to translate and time pressures (I finally get why one guardian translator cut out some of the novel, they were trying to get out the weilan content asap for people). There's also parts where you just won't know how to word it in the language you're translating to, what would be best, and you have to make a decision you don't think is perfect and surely isn't (and maybe there is no perfect decision for translating that line, just many various "Okay but not perfect" choices).

On the other hand. Translation is absolutely a skill. A skill that requires a LOT of practice and is separate from language comprehension skills. Yeah, knowing the languages helps so you don't make foolish grammar or mean meaning errors that machine translations make. But beyond that, so much is you personally breaking down sentences and words and deciding what's a good equivalent in meaning/style/effect in the language you're translating to. And there's no perfect answer, only various "okay" answers that will be biased by translator. Which is why it can be fun to read various translations of one piece, they might all be right but retain certain elements and not others (like when I think of rainbowse7ens edited translations with details added a lot of the emotion/atmosphere of the writing style was retained but specific wording was lost, when I translated some guardian I retained wording amount but wasn't super confident of my word selection and think yuka did better however I felt I retained priests writing style of sentences well and therefore the Effect of it, Yuka did a great job retaining word choice but I think some sentence structure and atmosphere the style created was lost, and meanwhile for modu I think edanglarstranslations did about as perfect a job as one could attempt at retaining mood/style/word choice to the point I could very easily match chinese audiobook to their translation and get a ton of phrase and wording and structure matches). So it's cool to see various translations as every single one will be tinged by translators interpretation of text, strengths and weaknesses, and what they personally valued keeping most and How (cause again there's no perfect one to one way to translate).

I realize the more I learn how much I do value people who do mtls and clean them up, and people who put out "gist" translations that may skimp on details but convey the mood of the text and plot and do it quickly. In both cases, so that either overall words get preserved (as best they can in edited mtl since mtls do tend to shorten and summarize] or so that the overall Feel of the novel gets preserved. So that there's a translation quickly, which is nice when otherwise there'd be none. Or until we hope and wait for a more in depth translator to have the time for those particular projects. Merebear translates is amazing for putting out so many timely dmbj translations which otherwise wouldn't exist at all, Yuka is amazing for putting out a guardian translation that kept the word choice, rainbowse7en was amazing for putting out a guardian translation when there was none and keeping the overall mood intact.

Theres value in a lot of different kinds of translating, along with how each individual one will simply vary by translators own things they tended to interpret/focus on most.

[gamespritearchive]

yes i like fullmetal alchemist brotherhood a normal amount (<- lying) this post is going to be long so open the readmore at ur own risk

ok this is genuinely going to be a mess because im really terrible at summarizing things and organizing my thoughts so if ur actually gonna read through this then good luck!

here are just some short thoughts before the longer paragraphs

- i absolutely LOVE the note that plays right after the alchemists clap their hands together that indicates that theyre abt to use alchemy. the sound of the clap + the note that plays is incredibly satisfying

- the strong and well-written female characters in this show was a really good touch and i loved how they brought them (izumi and olivier) together at the end :') also their beefy husbands together was super nice too

- my favorite part of the story was actually the part where ed and al go to briggs because thats wher they introduced olivier. it was super nice to see her talk about how strong-willed she is and her army and all of that

- lan fan is another example of a strong female character but a little less favorable since she serves ling yao. that doesnt make her any less cool though she was super badass and i definitely cried over her more than once

- the details in this show was really nice. alphonse's body being malnourished was something that seemed really obvious, but the fact that when ed got his right arm back it was noticeably less muscular and had longer nails than his left was such a good detail

- in the last episode there was a scene where alphonse made a dumb face that was animated just like how ed's faces looked and that made me really happy that we finally get to see al emote just like his brother :')

- im pretty sure i cried through the entirety of the last episode because being able to see the characters laugh and smile without feeling burdoned by anything after youve seen them go through repeated heartache and physical pain for 63 episodes is a super nice feeling

- "i'm a terrible father but i want to make you two proud" .

- "i'll give you half of my life and you give me half of yours" UGH

- also right after this when ed was laughing at how flustered winry got because normally hes the one who gets flustered :') that was so sweet

- i literally guessed that it was morse code whenever they showed selim banging on al's head because its like why would they put so much emphasis on that and let it go on for like 10 seconds without any music over it. this happened like multiple times too and i guessed it before they made it incredibly obvious bye im the smartest guy alive

ok heres where i talk more besties lets go

fmab was absolutely worth watching 64 episodes. i was convinced that i probably wont finish it because i have trouble finishing 12 episodes but as it may be obvious i got super invested. fmab being this long allowed there to be enough time to explain aspects of the story separately and to watch them all come together at some point. it also allowed for a ton of details that even though they're small, they're still important to the story. they rehash a lot of points because it was a simple detail that could get lost through the story but when its rementioned and you recall the time, it's such a nice feeling to have that click in ur mind.

also the character development was really good and ill get more in-depth about characters later but the length of this anime also allowed for a ton of really good character development. it ties into the whole thing where you learn about a characters backstory and you don't understand why it's important to the show until later on and then you're like ohhhh holy shit that makes sense now! also all that time for character development also lets you get attached to more than just the main characters and makes you care more about the role they play in the story.

roy mustang. at first i liked him, but when he started to speak about how he wanted to become the fuhrer president before he knew the military was corrupt, i assumed that he would just become as corrupt as bradley was ("starting wars for no reason"). i was convinced for the longest time that he would eventually just turn out to be the second bad guy and that nearly came true whenever he was trying to kill envy but riza helped him :) i loved the entirety of their relationship they're so sweet and compliment eachother so well. the scene where roy demonstrates the sheer amount of trust he has in riza's abilities by blindly (heh. he was blind during this if u didnt know.) following her directions and hitting their target ... it was just so good. also even though i didnt trust roy i thought he was super badass the sound of him snapping was always super satisfying as well

i almost want to rewatch fmab because it would be really nice to pick up on things that were later referenced in the anime. because of how long it is, its super easy to forget about things that happened early on in the anime (especially for someone with memory issues lol) so being able to watch back with the second half of the show still fresh on my mind would be almost an entirely different experience. the first thing that comes to mind is whenever we were shown kimblee in prison super early on. i know he had dialogue but i remember nothing about it because i was focused on thinking "literally who the fuck is this guy lol" but now i know. wow.

edward elric. im aware that this is going to be incredibly biased but i literally do not care. anyways. character development is always important and needed within a story but i genuinely feel like ed's character development was interesting to watch. it was never super obvious and his core values never changed. he did somewhat have a change in attitude when he nearly died to kimblee, but thats like expected you know ... being that close to death and all. i think that event was essentially the beginning of the end of his naivety. he was always consistent with the people he cared about though :) he never stopped calling them stupid and weird and he never stopped threatening to punch hohenheim whenever he was frustrated even if they were like in the middle of like a life or death situation. i just think he's neat

when ed destroyed pride('s vessel) i felt my heart well up with. pride LOL. that was his very first explicit win against someone who has been against him this entire time, and seeing him defeat pride with his own two hands was such a nice feeling. it wasnt technically his own win since he was only able to get to that point because of his friends and family around him

episode 60 was suuper good it was the part where the father was gonna swallow god because of the solar eclipse. its super hard to explain if uve never seen it but basically the scene was super cool simply because of how well the animation showed the sheer scale of what was happening. like this guy was literally reaching to the moon. theres a lot of unnatural things that are shown in fmab and although this scene didnt introduce any new concepts, it was still incredibly captivating because of how well the animation was

aand thats it i think! i regret not writing down how i feel during the earlier episodes but i think watching it with little to no distractions was a better experience. if u actually read this im giving u a kiss on the cheek rn ilu

[grotesquegabby]

How would your Slasher AU characters felt about mine? Sorry if I haven't provided enough details

woo its long heheh sorry for taking so long uwu

Alex - (his opinions are short x3)

Stellar: oooooh~ Another one. Perhaps they can play together? A little one v one. :J

Coraline: pretty lady~. final girl material but also slasher material

Roger: hmmm~ Nobodies that perfect without hiding something dark~ :J

Lily: cute kid, will gift things and give advice to her.

twins: same to the twins x3 He will gift them things

Cecilio - Doing Cecilio first uwu

Stellar: Would probably end up seeing him at Vespers place. Would think ah he looks cool and hip and now. And clearly has a thing for this mortician. Hed get another vibe from him and be like I better stay on his good side

Lily: Cute kid, looks...lonely. Might try and make her laugh if he cant do that perhaps he can help in a different way. Cecilio loves kids the same in this au as in the og. He might give her a gift here and there if and when they cross paths like. Heres a snack or heres a book. uwu or heres a map and compass

Roger: Ah he seems like such a nice guy :D

Coraline: A lonely looking lady. Hed probably meet her in one of Lennies areas and try and keep her out by being friendly and saying hey you lost. or hey this areas actually pretty dangerous I could show you a trail thats safer. cause he does try to help people

Twins: cute kiddos! :D Gift them snacks too  x3  as long as their dads cool with it.

Belinda -

Stellar: He seems nice too, really exciting! Wonders if hed be interested in some of the old game systems in her attic. Her mother never got rid of them and doesn’t like talking about them for some reason and no one in the house plays them. So maybe he’d like them, he seems like he’d like videogames uwu

Roger: He seems like such a wonderful person. Perhaps she could befriend him too! And his kids are absolutely darling uwu

Coraline: Perhaps she could use a friend. Belinda would love to be that friend!

Lily: A sweet little one, shed be so worried for Lily cause shes wandering out alone. Shed offer her help but if she refused shed wonder what she could do then.

Twins: Look at them! instantly spoils them

Amaranthus -

Lily: Its a person....my size! She would literally shake with excitement cause I imagine Lily would be the first kid shes seen up close. She wouldn’t know how to react but might run away from her. Not out of fear but to keep the kid safe from her dad. Shed be worried that her dad would do something cause he always does something to humans. But little does Ama know he avoids kids like the plague x3 But if given a chance shed offer a gift of friendship. something from nature like a pinecone, an acorn or a doll made from stuff in nature so it might have an acorn head and a pinecone body x3

twins: oh god now theres Two people my size! Shes not used to socializing and could only handle so much at once but more kids her age would just be so thrilling. Shed have to offer them a gift made from nature as well x3

Roger: The twins usually come with Roger so seeing Roger she might...run. Adults mean trouble usually. Cause if its not her dads warnings about them its grandpa Cecilios whose worried about more than her just being taken away. So she would run from him out of fear.

Stellar: Shed run from Stellar too out of fear. She just can’t be seen by adults they freak out.

Coraline: hmmmm...shed run from her too. But....unlike Roger and Stellar...she might actually...spy on her from far away. cause shes a pretty lady x3 and Ama doesn’t see pretty ladies come onto the woods very often. So....stare x3

Billy -

adults: He may just straight up attack them or hunt them. Adult humans bring, deforestation, pollution, danger to his child. plus they make good food. hes pretty animal like in some cases so itd be hard for him to see Roger, Stellar, Coraline and other wise as anything but prey/threat/competition. But in time who knows~

children: He will avoid them. If theres anything he learned from Rosalia its human children dont mean any harm and sometimes dont understand everything. Dont harm them so he avoids them. If one gets in his space hell pick them up by their shirt, jacket or whatever and carry them out of his territory or to the edge of the forest/town. Send them back.

Lennie -

So for Lennie I’m going to summarize them into two categories.

Adults: Granted he won’t attack every adult out there but if they pose a threat he wont like them very much and will...attack. Coraline didn’t pose a threat and didn’t just take off to Lennies own surprise so he wasn’t prepared. The others might be considered a threat especially since they are also males..this is another big thing for Lennie. Men tend to be more aggressive so he really doesn’t take kindly to other males being around him.

children: smaller humans make Lennie curious. And if they are with an adult Lennie is more likely to actually leave the adult humans alone vs if there were no children with them. He recognizes them as young humans and doesn’t really want to harm them. He is partially human himself after all. He once actually snuck into a campsite becuase it was a couple who brought along their 10 month old baby. He snuck into the babies tent to get a better look at them. The couple of course when found him they he was going to eat their baby. He ran off back into his swamp and left them alone...when they were awake anyway.

Mana and Kala - These two are kind of a collective and stick to each other a lot. Already mates in this au.

They are very territorial so they would just view most of them as a threat or food. But over time and depending on how they are handled they will grow to trust. I imagine itll be Coraline or Lily to do it x3 Plus Mana is the friendly of the two still. 

(Calliope, Dovev, and such are still being worked on so probably wont hear about their opinions jussst yet uwu )

[dunewizard]

30 Days of Autism Acceptance - Day 15

The questions I’m answering can be found here!

April 15: Free day! Write about any topic you want!

I have a few things to say today. 

In this post I talk about coming back to running my own Dungeons and Dragons games. Theres also a paragraph tangent about Drow and RA Salvatores Drizzt series. Because Drow are my favs.

.

One thing I’m very excited about is the fact that I’m getting back into running my own D&D games. I lost the passion for it for a while. it wasnt right, I wasnt running my own work and the work I was running was depressing. I’m not big into gothic horror, at least not anymore - I sort of burnt myself out on the topic after I ran Curse of Strahd. So when i went to run it a second time because I “am comfortable/know the story well” it was right off the back of doing it already.  I felt burnt out. Especially because right after the first time I ran Curse of Strahd I immediately went onto Storm King’s Thunder, which is an entirely different campaign which you REALLY need to read the WHOLE thing and understand the working parts to get that story off the ground. 

There was an emotional investment and skill requirement that I just didn’t have and it turned what should be a fun and interactive hobby into simply a chore. I’m blessed to have had players who understood that I’m a player at the table too and my imput as DM is necessary to facilitate gameplay so without me the game shouldnt run. My heart wasn’t in it and I needed time away. Folks who have read my Blondie Talks tag would be familiar with the plight, it was around 6-8 months ago tho. I think.

I’m now coming back to being a Dungeonmaster and I love it so much. I have a fantastic team of players who seem as invested in the story and their characters as I am which honestly sounds too good to be true. But I see it in the way they play and interact with the game it warms my heart. I’m not running depressing Gothic Horror anymore and now I’m running a campaign set in my favourite setting: The Underdark! Undeground caves littered with danger and intrigue! Who knows whats around the next corner?! And DROW. I LOVE Drow. 

Drow are easily my favourite race found in D&D, and my main campaign theme is trying to show that evil is a choice and that no creature is inherently evil. Sort of thing. I dont know. I was mostly inspired by R.A Salvatore’s Drizzt DoUrden series, as “the only good drow” he goes through many moral conundrums as he considers the ideas that... well. Hes a Drow. Everything hes been told so far is that Drow are evil, and they do this and that. So much of what hes told hes like... I dont align with this... I dont agree. I will fight for my friends I wont leave them aside! Combo that with legendary skill with some swords and you got a killer character there dude, hes facing his own morality! Hes wondering whos evil and whos not!  One of my favourite conversations the book has  is when some Goblins are outside the Dwarven City of Mithrilfast, and the King waves his hand to say “Just kill them and be done with it”. Cattie Brie, his adopted daughter tries to appeal to his compassion by pleading him to only scare them off! With the poignant mention “what if they were drow?!” - knowing full well that Drizzt was RIGHT there in their court, and it was well established that Drizzt is a friend with noble intentions and a good heart. The fact that Drizzt was there made him think “What if there is a Drizzt among those goblins?” and to summarize the situation the King ends up not slaying the Goblins. Its hard to quite explain but the books go into much better detail about these concepts.

ANYWAY Sorry I prattled. I’m running a game set in the Underdark! My players are phenomenal and I’m seriously finding my passion for Dungeon Mastering once more. I cant wait to throw more challenges towards my players and I’m so excited to see what they do!

I lost the spark for Dungeons and Dragons for a little bit because of my DMing hiatus. I never lost the interest but everything in me questioned why I loved it still so much. I played as my main Wizard character named Hermes, my friend jake’s campaign was every Sunday afternoon and I loved it. We always made sure to do something on “D&D Day” even if we couldnt continue the main campaign. I’ve loved the game for the last 6 years and I cannot see myself ever dropping the game, its simply one of those infinite content sort of games! Its really helped me come out of my shell and improve my acting abilities and I love being a player and understanding plot hooks and trying to be a better player for new tables too. 

I couldnt think of a better way to spend my free time <3

[milksopangela]

wooHOO

12 December 2017

ALRIGHT LISTEN UP FELLAS THERES A BUNCH OF SHIT I HAVE TO PUT DOWN

okay first of all, johnnyboy is all well and out of the hospital!

and thats not the only good news i have for ya my friendos

guess who has been christened as johnathan’s girlfriend, ITS ME wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

oh boy so many things happened let me just try try to summarize and remember

-johnnyboy and i spent a few nights falling asleep with each other on the phone while he was in the hospital

- we would say some great stuff to eachother and everytime i remember something sweet he said i just get all fuzzy inside ahhh

-we also talked about some sex stuff ;]

- nOT ONLY TALKED BUT DID SOME NICE STUFF IF YA KNOW WHAT I MEAN WINK WINK NUDGE NUDGE SAY NO MORE

-god i want to do that again, god i just want to be there and have him frick me silly 

- we actually have a lot in common, some of our thoughts, and also stuff we were nervous about and thought that we were weird for doing. like he said looking at pictures of me while he did the do and i was LIKE OMG I LITERALLY THINK OF YOU EVERYTIME I DO IT. it was really flattering and i was shocked that he would do all that stuff, he didn’t seem the type.

-i hate the universe for making such a perfect boy but making him so far away.

- im gonna be cheesy here. thursday 4:15am. :]

-spent hours sharing music with each other, it was nice i enjoyed it 

- he sends me cute videos and they make me smile such a huge smile and i cant stop myself

- i constantly tell him hes cute and i think hes getting bored with it, i cant think of words to say to him. he makes me nervous but also really comfortable.

- i have this gnawing feeling that im not gonna be enough for him. he has all these complex thoughts about everything and im just so simple minded.

- he constantly tries to get me to say my last name and i just tell him to use his :sweat_smile:

- theres so many things he does and has done that make my heart feel so warm and my body so tingly, i love it. im so in love with him and i just want to tell him that all the time.

-still theres times where i feel unconfident. like should i be doing this? am i really so in love with him or is it just me overreacting? i dont want to ruin another relationship.. idk sometimes i wonder why he even likes me so much. it feels so good whenever i talk to him but when its just me im filled with these thoughts of worry. idk.. maybe i should stop worrying and just enjoy even if it doesn’t last?

-geoff called me and motivated me to do the whole college thing and try to move out of state or at least out of cg.

- idk what im feeling, i think the songs im listening to are making me sad

- i honestly still feel so lost but having johnathan there makes the wild ride better and a lot less lonely.

-been going to the gym, lets try to keep it that way?

i feel like if i wrote on the days these things happened it would be a lot more detailed, i really need to write daily.

anyways, im tired my dear blog-iary, ill leave you with a song i just found and a goodnight 

BØJET - i need you

                                                                                                           Maria Angela

[amourete-blog1]

(( everything’s gone to hell, sup with you? log starts online and goes ftf shortly after. consistent formatting is fake so we hopped around a couple times - sorry :’33

tagging: @vvicissitudo @9hosis @brackishbarracuda @changinaspirations 

begin log:

amourete Do you know anything about what's going on?

vvicissitudo first, yes, and second, hi felide drags hands dowwn my fuckin face

amourete Big fucking mood.

vvicissitudo you don't evven fuckin knoww but you're about to all that shit is interconnected

amourete That's. That's really... REALLY bad. Please tell me it's not what I'm thinking.

vvicissitudo so lets see if i can summarize this real good wwhat are you thinking

amourete :')) Well, Cho's apparently lost a fucking LIMB according to what I got out of Lucy, and Meenah is completely missing

vvicissitudo yeah shes uh in hidin

amourete What????

vvicissitudo theres a feww reasons im theorizin but as wwhatevver the fuck is happening wwith sal gets revvealled i'm pretty sure it ain't much of an issue if he's THAT bad you ain't expect cho to get an arm lopped off an just have Sal sittin idly by yeah but uh wwe're gettin ahead of ourselvves so you said meenah wwas supposed to showw up, right an she didn't

amourete Yes.

vvicissitudo its because wwe got a message early yesterday mornin from chosis wwho was sittin our youngest kid, auraya an i guess there wwas an accident of some kind  that uh ended up in our kid bein burned bad by chosis or one of sals kids or sal or somethin, it gets a little blurry at that point an i ain't too sure the details but the point is that meenah wwent ovver there yesterday morn an came back covvered in yelloww and olivve an wwith herself wwounded also an im sure she thought sally wwas gonna bloww a fuckin fuse ovver it so she aint uh here i mean, lookin at sally's blog i aint so sure he didn't bloww one anywway only in a uh, more literal sense but that aint here nor there any questions so far

amourete None.

vvicissitudo i wwant to go ovver and help but considerin he sent vvis awway i'm pretty sure he'd lay into me just for tryin he and i aren't on the best terms but i still aint wwantin... this i mean... my moirail maimed his moirail, wwould you wwant me comin ovver to try to help i'm at a fuckin loss an i ain't knowwin wwhat to fuckin do just sit here on the steps i guess, wwaitin to see if sal does come either to ask an apology or return the favvor or... wwhatevver

vvicissitudo i reiterate; drags hands dowwn my fuckin face i just wwant to bang my head into a wwall a feww times are uh you okay i mean obvviously not but yeah

amourete I'm managing. Worried, but... Managing. Are *you* okay?

vvicissitudo i havve no fuckin clue i havvent slept i havvent eaten meenah aint here vvis aint here the kids aint here its just me in this big hivve wwith my big gun

amourete I can stand guard with you. Maybe give you a chance to rest? Even if you don't sleep.

vvicissitudo yeah alright wwhat about you though and your uh empress situation heard anythin or, do you havve to be there to guard still or no

amourete It's hard for me to leave Lil, but Xanthe's here now, and so is Porrim. I can stand watch with you for a while. :33

vvicissitudo alright then. porters wwide open if you got the coords

amourete I do. Give me a few minutes and I'll be there.

vvicissitudo sure thing.

--- Face-To-Face below this line ---

amourete > Pop! Or maybe it's more of a zap? You're here, and in your hand you have a little knapsack you brought of, indeterminate nature. > Clams said he would be on the steps. You seek him out.

vvicissitudo > Right away, immediately, you're there. Dressed in your full regalia, leather armor, neck guard, full blown cape and arm guards and... There's not really much of your skin that isn't protected. You've got a gun half as big as you propped up on your shoulder- Ahabs. It looks dusty.

You jump when she arrives, but you have training, and your trigger finger isn't on the trigger itself. When you see its her, you lower the weapon and put your head in your hands. With your hair braided and tied up to the top of your head, you look 110% done and tensed for a war.

amourete > Oh. That hurts.

You've never seen a royal violet in battle garb before: in your day, your band of misfits never warranted that kind of force, probably out of pride. But seeing him now, knowing why he's dressed the way he is... He doesn't deserve this.

"Hey." You offer a soft smile, with a hint of sympathy, and lift the knapsack. "Brought some snacks. I know you may not be interested, but if you plan to be here for a while, you'll need to keep up your strength. Couldn't get fish though - too expensive."

For an olive, anyway. You did try.

You make your way up the first couple steps to sit with him.

vvicissitudo Your nose detects food, and you lift your head, watching her. She has the softest, smallest smile on her face. You give her one in return, and set the gun down.

"Before you leave, I want you to go... down to the sixth lower floor. Take anything you want. Something big, something small. As a token of my well appreciated gratitude." Your voice sounds so tired. Before it would be soft and sonorous, pretty and smooth to hear, and now you just sounded like you've been marathon singing.

amourete He'd probably be a great singer, if he had been singing.

"Sixth lower floor?" You laugh, which sounds more like the snicker of a cartoon fox. "What's there? I've yet to see much of this place at all, I have no idea how you keep track of it all."

You lay out the fabric, and in it are a couple different camping snacks: jerky you made, from one of your infrequent hunts; dried fruits; some biscuits. It's not anything fancy, but it's a little better than you had for your watches at home. The fruit is certainly an improvement.

vvicissitudo You... Oops. OOOPS!! You're welling up with tears, suddenly sniffling and wiping your nose. The gesture is so... It's so small, but it's so... Ahh...

You wipe your face and smile through your few tears and kind of... cry-laugh a few times, sniffling. "I... I changed my mind, take anything you like, clean it out if you want, fuck, I..."

You take the jerky with a trembling hand, and stick it in your mouth to shut you up.

amourete At first you're scared you said something wrong. For a moment, the humorous and terrifying idea that you've somehow insulted his opulent home finds a place in your thoughts. Is that why he's crying? But this isn't the case: context saves you from fearing a social gaff, and you settle in just to sit, and unfold one of your captcha cards.

"I still don't know what you're talking about," you point out with gentleness, "but we can deal with it later. Not now."

The green card, folded into the shape of a paper cat, comes apart under deft fingers, and as soon as the form of a proper captcha card is visible, it launches a tissue box up in the air. You have to jump up to retrieve it before it falls on him.

You offer it out as you sit again. "I'll be here for a while. It's hard to stand watch alone, and right now, there's nowhere I would rather be."

vvicissitudo > Clearing your throat, you watch with soft, quiet amusement as she unfolds the card, until a tissue box is launched upwards- You jump, startled, and she catches it and offers it.

> You take some of the tissue, and wipe your face, crumpling the ball up and placing it in a pocket somewhere. "... Y-yeah. It is... I uh... Also... You asked how I keep track of the floors, here, yeah?" You look to the floor, tapping the immaculate, perfect flooring. "I uh... Built most of it myself. Everything below us I carved out and built up, and everything above us was originally mostly gutted. Meenah and I.. We've turned this place into our home. It feels... Wrong, that it's... threatened..."

amourete You let the box rest on a step, for when he needs it next. You're pretty sure he will. Hell, *you* might by the end of this, if you're not careful.

"It's hard, but it's not permanent. Meenah has endured hard things. So have you. We just have to hold onto our hope. It's hard, at times, yes - but no one said you had to do it alone."

vvicissitudo > You look to her, and you sniffle again. A violet droplet hangs off your nose, and you attempt to smile. "Y-yeah. I got you, after all... uh... Can I ask... Can I ask a question? Why... Why is this the only place you'd rather be...? Do you want to.. wait for her, when she gets back?"

amourete You almost answer, and then something ghosts across your face that stops you. You close your mouth and look down, one hand reaching for the key that hangs around your neck.

"I've always waited," you say softly. "It's been my life, and it was every one of my deaths, first of mind, then of body. I know how to wait and endure, and the thing I learned most of all is how hard it is to do alone."

You try for a smile, looking back up to him. "So yes, maybe I'll wait for her, but my first thought was 'I can't just leave him there.'"

vvicissitudo > Nope, no, nope, god, you're gonna cry again

> Only this time you lean over and you wrap your arms around her, and you wordlessly cry. You're a big blubbering mess- Meenahs gone, the kids have been gone for weeks, everyones been in danger, you've lost weight and you've just. You've been stressed and tensed and she's here, someone else is here to fill the silence, to keep you company through however long it takes Meenah to return.

amourete Yeah, okay, you should have expected that. You didn't. Sucks to suck!

You wrap your arms loosely around him, bowing your head and holding him as long as he needs. You don't cry, but your silent reverence speaks volumes on its own: every moment you're here is a prayer for Meenah's safety and Cho's recovery.

vvicissitudo > After two or three minutes of tight hugging, you move back from her, and use the tissues again, sitting in silence for a few more minutes. "... you wait here," You eventually say, softly. "I'll be right back." You put a now-steadied hand on her head and stand, metal clinking from some of your armor.

amourete That's probably the funniest thing you've seen all day. You hold your tongue for now, suppressing your giggles, and nod, sitting up straight and attentive. You can pretend to be well-behaved, really!

vvicissitudo > You're headed upstairs quickly, and downstairs just as quickly, holding steaming plates of meat on one arm, a loaf of bread in that hand, your other arm bundled around a couple of condiments (Pickles, mustard, etc). A knife clatters to the floor as it drops, and you sit down just as quick as you'd stood up.

"... I know you brought stuff, but I wanted to offer stuff to you as well."

amourete Stair picnic! You beam. "That's okay! I'm just glad you're eating something." That's the hardest part. You've been dealing with Lil eating scarcely for the past week, so it's an evil you know.

vvicissitudo > It's very hard for you to eat when you're stressed. You're sure meenah complains about it enough to others for them to know you don't eat enough- and if she doesn't, the lithe build of your frame shows off that you've lost a little weight in the past month or so- your skin sags where it shouldn't, not that Felide can tell too much without looking, you're covered much too well.

> You begin making sandwiches, being generous with the meat. "... Yeah? I mean... I guess. I ain't rememberin when i rightly ate last... what about you?"

amourete "I keep to a routine." You shrug, relaxing and laying your chin on your hands. "Habit is stronger than impulse. It's important that I keep my strength up - I have a family to provide for, and I can't allow myself to miss work or be careless. Simple as that, really."

vvicissitudo You nod, listening. You hand her a sandwich, and look to the door, fins flicking. "... You think it'll be okay?" You mumble, softly. "what if I'm just overreacting..."

amourete You thank him for the sandwich, taking it and taking a little bite first. Once you've swallowed it, then you answer: "Your partner is missing in action, and your other partner lost a limb. No, you're not overreacting. Trust me."

vvicissitudo > You blink, taken slightly aback. "Cho ain't my partner, he's my brothers. Cho an I aren't... THAT close... ... Have you talked to vis, though, speakin of... He's missin. Just... flatout gone. No words from anyone. I don't..."

You put your head in your hands again. "I don't know where he is. The connection we share says he's cold, and it's too... sharp, wherever he is."

amourete You look confused, but you let it go: It's probably Cho jumping the gun again. You don't think they'd lie, they're just a little eager, that's all.

"No, I don't know. Vici does though. He mentioned seeing Vis yesterday, but I didn't think much of it. I didn't know he was involved. I don't know about today though - I can ask?"

vvicissitudo You try to chuckle, it comes out dry. "Cho and I are good friends, but we're not... lovers, like Vis or Sally. I wwouldn't call us partners in that sense, no... but you said Vici knows?" You look to your sandwich, taking a few bites. "... Vis lives with Chosis," You say softly. "I bet he saw the whole thing."

amourete Oh you hope that's not so.

"Vici mentioned him the other day online. It could be worth asking, at least... I'm not sure otherwise. That's the only lead I have."

vvicissitudo You look down further, to your feet, your nice boots, your palmhusk laying on the floor. You've barely touched it today. There were other messages... You didn't know the handle of one, you didn't touch it. You should check those.

You sigh, and yawn a bit. "... Yeah, alright. You ask, I guess. I hope it'd be somewhat beneficial..."

amourete You give him a Look. "If you take a nap, I will. You need your rest. I'll wake you if something happens, or if we get more news - promise."

vvicissitudo > You blink your eyes tiredly to that Look, which certainly is like the ones Meenah can give you sometimes. "Don't you..." Yawn. "Don't you dare blackmail me, you... You heckin nerd." You tease, and lean back on the steps, shifting over to the side of the stairs. "I ain't movin from the stairs, though..."

amourete You unclip the day cape you wore over to the hive, simple and warm, and fold it up, placing it under where his head would fall.

"I won't make you move," you promise. "Get some good rest, okay? I'll be here."

vvicissitudo > You wrap your own around your shoulders some more, getting nice and comfortable. "... Yeah, alright. You eat that sandwich." You chuckle tiredly, and close your eyes.

> It... It takes you a while, to fall asleep. Each small noise, each small breath, wakes you and rouses you from half sleep, but eventually, you do so.

[evangelineartemiasamos]

Unpopular opinion: There's so much in Red Queen that's unexploited/unexplained, it annoys me a lot??? So much worldbuilding, characters (stares at Shade and Tristan and Walsh), powers, lore, etc... a lot of it goes unused.. I especially wish we'd gotten more with Shade; I know it was a point that he and Mare were splitting but we still got very little from him or most newbloods and it was really annoying Ik it's a small series but theres just so much MORE that she introduced + never explained

strongly agree | agree | neutral | disagree | strongly disagree

Which book doesn’t have some problems with worldbuilding? We talked about that before, especially about how American dystopian novels completely ignore other continents. Other books handle that better, eg. none of the books in The Lunar Chronicles take place in America but in East Asia, France, Africa and on the moon. Aveyard said she doesn’t want to put too much thought into worldbuilding asks whereas Samantha Shannon answers such questions frequently, as she apparently has made a very thorough and detailed worldbuilding for The Bone Season and is able to reply to such questions without giving away spoilers.

Sometimes I think the main difference between YA fantasy and other fantasy is tha YA novels shy away from too much worldbuilding as if teenagers can’t handle it whereas I would devour 10 (or more) pages of info dumping without any complaint -.- Give me glossaries and make me happy

I agree with the characters as well. Walsh and Tristan are written okay for me, until Walsh says this “for Tristan” when she dies but we never get to see how they’ve been close, not even in Steel Scars (and I really want to know what has happened to Saraline from Steel Scars as well).

Shade is defintely underdeveloped. I can HC a lot and I like it but it’s not great to tell people about the close relationship between Mare and Shade all the time and then never show it. They talk a little in the beginning of Glass Sword, then Mare worries about his injuries, we get some Fade hints and that’s it. I see that Mare needs to feel isolated, but that doesn’t explain why Shade cares so little for her well-being? She could always brush him off again and this works with Kilorn and Cal, so why is Shade left out? Even if I assume he is too occupied with being in love and keeping the mission running, he and Mare should talk more. I think maybe some scenes have been cut. There’s a mention of how Shade got injured when they recruited Nanny and I feel like that was part of the story before Aveyard decided to summarize it. Maybe some sibling interaction has gotten lost there.

In King’s Cage, I have the biggest peeve about Elane because we don’t get to see any inkling of her feelings and opinions on the happenings. I don’t want to demonize convenience marriages, but “mutually agreed upon” before things even happen isn’t enough. Because there are going to be problems with their arrangement. I’m not sure if Aveyard was too lazy to write more about Elane or if this is to show that Evangeline lacks empathy and cares mostly about herself, but if I can’t tell, it’s a flaw in the writing.

Give me an opinion

[lookwhatilost]

oh okay im going to do an ask meme and put it under a cut bc i am having trouble sleeping tonight and my switch is charging :(

1: Do you ever wish you were someone else?

i think everyone does at some point. i dnt have a desire to be a specific other person, but a different version of myself i guess. i dnt have strong envy targeted at individuals but a lot of sadness related to my choices and circumstances that have culminated bc of them

2: What is your full name?

i am not going to post that here

3: How old are you and how old do you get mistaken for?

i’m 24 (25 nxt month... that’s weird) and usually people assume i’m 20-22

4: Have you ever dyed your hair?

i’ve lost count of how many times

5: What’s your eye color?

very dark brown

6: Your opinion about your body and how comfortable you are with it

ive talked a lot abt this in the past so im going to reiterate the same things ive said abt it in the past – i dnt have an abundance of gripes w it cosmetically, but i have a lot of anger (esp rn) towards my endometriosis, and i see my body as an extension of myself. & i dnt like myself very much. so there is that

7: Do you have any tattoos or piercings?

i have a white ink tattoo of the neptune symbol on my left wrist and my ears are pierced

8: What would you say is your best quality?

i dnt know

9: What are you really bad at?

i can’t dance lmfao

10: What talent do you wish you had?

i wish i was better at writing, in general & songwriting. i’m not completely terrible at it, but i dnt have a natural gift for it and i wish i didnt have to expend as much effort to improve it

11: Are you nice to everyone?

i try to be but it doesnt always happen like that... usually yes unless i feel provoked

12: What do you think about the most?

usually stuff like “how would life be different now if i did (abc) instead of (xyz)?”

13: Things you like/dislike about yourself

i like my sense of style and that i can be very disciplined when i put my mind to it. i dnt like that i usually do not Put My Mind To It and that i have doormat tendencies

14: What is your least favorite word?

i can’t think of one but i rly hate “nourish”, “catty-cornered”, “crabby”, “folks”, “peck”, anything that can be categorized as “heckin doggo” genre babyspeak, “trauma” and “empower” bc they’re misused so often... and i rly strongly hate the word “h*rny” lmfao ive always thought it was auditory/visual vomit and it dznt help that the context is never good

15: What is your favorite word?

again i dnt have a favorite but i’m very fond of “eloquent”, “neon”, “incandescent”, “anodyne”, “mechanism”, and “celestial”

16: Are you more like your mom or your dad?

i look more like my dad but i bear very little resemblance to either of them in terms of character

17: Would you ever smile at a stranger?

it’s polite? why wouldnt i

18: A reason you’ve lied to someone

because i dnt want to look pathetic

19: Are you lying about anything right now?

im not being honest w andrew abt how conflicted i am towards him

20: Have you kissed someone older than you?

only one who was significantly older than me

21: Do you believe in love at first sight?

instant connections, yeah. love, obviously not... but i also dnt think the phrase is meant to be taken completely literally

22: Do you believe in soulmates?

not in the traditional sense but i do use the phrase “soulmate” to describe life-altering figures that ive viewed affectionately. but none of those ppl are rly in my life to the capacity they once were anymore. so like i said. not in the traditional sense

23: Are looks important?

im assuming this is in the context of relationships & people who say they aren’t are lying

24: Opinion on relationship age differences

they matter less the older both parties are, i think that is the general rule of thumb. justin was almost a decade older than me and i wasn’t too bothered by that. but i think i would be if it was anyone older than that? as for people who aren’t me... i judge but i keep it mostly to myself

25: Would you date someone off the Internet?

no

26: Have you ever cried over a boy/girl?

been doing it since i was 12 😎🤟

27: Have you ever wanted someone you couldn’t have?

default state

28: Anyone you’re giving up on right now?

myself, basically

29: Have you ever liked someone who your friends hated?

andrew but lbr they are not wrong to feel that way

30: Have you ever liked your best friend?

sore subject

31: How does someone win your heart?

if they make me feel less alone, like in the “i identify strongly w this person, and i like them, and in turn i like myself a little more” way. the “being around you makes me feel like a person and not a freak of nature hiding behind groucho marx glasses” way

32: What turns you on?

im not answering this in the sexual way but i tend to think people are more likable and attractive when they think critically, have a quick wit... a lot of nonverbal things too but it’s hard to capture what that is in writing bc i can’t always readily identify it

33: What turns you off?

same as above w the nothing sexual disclaimer. i hate recycled meme type humor and people whose entire personality is the media they consume (like adults who are weirdly into disney)

34: Do you get jealous easily?

not easily but it gets triggered by rly strange things

35: What is your definition of cheating?

in the broadest definition, intimacy that goes beyond the discussed boundaries of a relationship. but i also cant foresee myself in a situation where im going on dates w several different ppl again consistently bc it wrought havoc on my brain, so i doubt that’s ever going to be anything other than What Everyone Understands As Cheating for me personally.

36: Do you forgive betrayal?

more easily than i probably should

37: Have you ever been cheated on?

ive had my suspicions in the past but nothing that i was ever able to confirm

38: Have you ever cheated on someone?

no but ive come closer to it than im proud of

39: How often do you listen to music?

pretty infrequently these days

40: First concert you attended

cyndi lauper lmfao

41: Last movie you watched

i think hereditary

42: Favorite type of movie

any slow burning drama w horror/suspense elements

43: Is there something that happened in your past that you hate talking about?

i can think of 4 things that i rly would prefer to be left in the dustbin of history but one of them wasn’t like Traumatic, jst stupid and embarrassing 

44: Are you good at hiding your feelings?

i’d say i’m abt as subtle as a gun 

45: Do you fall in love easily?

somewhat? i think i do it incorrectly

46: Do you think people say I love you too much?

i dnt think theres anything wrong w that

47: What’s your favorite holiday?

anything that’s an excuse to party w no gift giving obligations

48: Are you a forgiving person? Do you like being that way?

generally yes and i have mixed feelings abt it

49: Where’s the most magical place on earth?

south 17th street

50: What’s your “type���?

the details are fluid but i think my entire dating/significant crush history can be summarized w “people who look like they dnt know how to use power tools’