#THE WAY I KINDA DIDN’T EVEN NOTICE BUT THATS REALLY FUNNY

[shepscapades]

YOU.

UMMMMMM

[miya-rin]

“what the fuck do you two think youre doing?”

shit, you think, you didnt notice the balcony door had been slid open until you heard the voice of one of your brothers. you start to pull away from suna’s lips which earns you a small whine from his end, his grip tightens around you and honestly it its quite cute the way he is trying so hard to savour the moment. “come back later, we’re kinda busy.” the boy mutters before trying to move your face away from the distraction so that he can kiss you once more.

“suna you get your hands off of her right now, i dont give a fuck that its your birthday.” osamu pipes up, he looks furious and a little bit disgusted, if it hadnt been for the situation youre in right now you would think its kind of funny.

“samu lay off him, it was a mutual agreement, im just as guilty as he is ok?” that does not seem to help the boys understand, if anything they seem even more angry with you both.

“what the fuck do you mean it was a mutual agreement? are you two hooking up or something? yn he just turned 18 a few hours ago are you forgetting that?” atsumu says, he is rambling on with every excuse he can think of as to why this is “so wrong”, from the corner of your eye you can see suna trying so very hard to hide the grin that is creeping its way onto his face, his hands still all over you despite the fact that you arent alone anymore.

“listen, it was his birthday wish ok? i swear it didn’t mean anything,” sunas grip begins to loosen ever so slightly, “i just though it would get him off my back and get him over his little crush on me.” suna’s facial expression shifts but you choose to ignore it, you have bigger problems to deal with at the moment.

“no this is not ok, how would you feel if me or samu kissed one of your friends because it was their birthday wish?”

“that’s different, why would my friends want to kiss either of you?”

“excuse me? ill have you know that many women want to kiss me! and dont think youre getting off the hook either suna, ill make sure you never-“ you dont even want to hear the threat that is about to come out of his mouth, you just want to get out of this shitty situation.

“boys please, just give us five minutes to talk and then we will be back inside ok? i promise.” your efforts to plead with your brothers finally work.

“…fine,” atsumu mumbles, “but this better be a one time thing. im not gonna deal with you two being all lovey dovey around me.” and with that he lightly tugs on osamu’s sleeve, signalling him to walk back inside and continue the party. he closes the balcony door but not before bringing two fingers up to his eyes and then pointing them at the two of you. its a warning.

you turn back to suna and notice the sad look on his face - he looks kinda cute like this, “so, what do-“.

“did you really mean what you just said to them?” the poor boy looks heartbroken, after waiting three years to finally have a chance with the girl he loves wants the moment is ruined like that? “did you actually just do that so i would leave you alone?” his hands fully leave your body now and he takes a step back to put some distance between you two.

“well i mean sort of yeah… ive never looked at you in any way other than my brothers best friend if im going to be honest, i dont know if thats because of the age difference or what but ive never thought we could be anything.” the look of hurt is prominent on his face no matter how hard he tries to hide it, normally playful banter would have been thrown back and forth between the two of you but rintarou just stays silent, an indication that youve fucked up.

“listen suna i dont know what you want me to say, i wasnt really thinking when i said that to atsumu it just came out. i am 4 years older than you and many people would not approve of us if i decided to give you a chance.”

“who cares? i could treat you so right if you would just let me. i have waited entirely too long for this moment, all im asking for is one date.”

“you said that about the kiss too, one thing is never enough with you is it? you always need more.” a playful smile creeps onto your face which is outshined by the one on sunas, he knows that your smile means that you agree to go on a date with him.

“i really hope you arent fucking with me right now, that would be so cruel, especially on my birthday.”

“oh give the birthday excuse a rest now will you? you dont need to keep on at me you have already got what you want.”

“mhm i absolutely have,” he walks closer and once again wraps his arms around you, placing a hand under your jawbone to make you look up at him, “and i couldnt be happier.” he states as he pulls you in for a passionate kiss once more <3

[pxperplxnets]

tiktok edits

summary: kimi catches y/n scrolling through ship edits of them.

pairing: kimi antonelli x driver!reader

word count: 841

warnings: none

lowercase intended!

-------------------------------------------

being a prema driver didn’t only mean driving, it also meant dealing with the media. it is fun to do some of the challenges and entertain the fans, but it was extremely tiring.

also, prema had already caught on in how the fans loved to see kimi and y/n paired up. there were even edits and small fan fictions written about them, which everyone but them seemed to find extremely funny.

y/n and kimi sat on a couch, in front of them were two paper sheets and a telephone. he had to book a room in a hotel without saying basically any words that were related with what he was looking for and she had to order a pizza without saying the name of the majority of the ingredients. she couldn't even say the word pizza!

After they finished filming, they went their separate ways to fulfil their remaining duties of the day.

about a week later, y/n sat on the drivers trailer at the end of the day, waiting for everyone else so she could say goodbye and hopefully get a ride home when she received a message from hamda.

the girl’s eyebrows furrowed in confusion when she opened it. she had sent her a link. she went into it, expecting the worst.

she found herself watching an edit of herself and kimi on the latest prema video. the slowed down version of dandelions by ruth b was playing in the speaker as multiple clips of them laughing or even looking at each other played over and over.

y/n smiled softly, liking the video and leaving a comment on it so the creator would see it was seen by her.

                             not.y/n

                               not me being fine asf

                                   >y/n.antonelli.editz

                                       obviously

she replied with a single omg to hamdas text and went back to tik tok, going into the profile where she had seen the edit. a smile formed on her lips as she saw the various edits of her and her fellow driver. she scrolled aimlessly through them, liking a few and adding them to her favourites.

no one had to know her favourites tab was filled with them. the other drivers already made fun of her for the mere existence of those videos, now imagine what they would say if they knew she actually liked them.

of course, luck was not on her side. without her even noticing, none other than andrea kimi antonelli had walked into the room.

she was facing away from the door, and her short stature helped him peek over her shoulder. his face went red when she liked and saved a video that really clearly shipped them.

the boy backed away lightly and cleared his throat, getting her attention. he couldt supress the small smile that creeped into his lips when she turned on her phone rapidly, so obviously trying to hide something.

“oh, hi” she stuttered, immediately regretting even opening her mouth. “hi… what were you watching?” he asked, a smug smile making it clear that he had definitely seen what she was watching. “just some edits that the fans make, you know” she tried to play it cool. “thats cool, who was it of?” the smile remained on his face, and she knew what he was trying to play. “just me and you, you know how much they ship us.”

the girl regretted starting that sentence almost immediately after she started speaking, and he could notice that from the way her voice lost confidence mid sentence. “yeah, it's kinda cute” he gave her a small smile. he thought he would be extremely nervous if a situation like that ever placed itself between them, but he was abnormally calm. “it is?” she looked up at him faintly confused. “yeah, do you not think so?” his head tilted slightly to the side as he showed an innocent smile. “yeah, i guess” she agreed, not completely understanding what was happening.

he was enjoying how flustered she was, kimi had to admit.

“you live fairly close, right?” she nodded, not expecting the sudden change of subject. “i can walk you, if you want. ill just take an uber from there or something.” he offered. her face was red as a tomato by that point. “you don't have to do that…” he shook his head, dismissing her statement. “just give me a second to get my stuff and we’ll go” he smiled at her once again and gave her a quick wink before walking towards his space on the trailer.

y/n just stood there dumbfounded, her head still trying to process everything when he spoke again. “ready?” she nodded, starting to walk alongside him. as they got out of the tailer, sebastian and hamda were walking towards it. kimi waved at them casually and kept walking. y/n did the same, not without earning a confused look from sebas and an excited one from hamda.

is safe to safe that after that, kimi walked her home many many times.

----------------------------------------------------------

author's note;

REUPLOAD

[tojiscrack]

on my weekly re-read of liar liar, and i was GOING TO pull an all nighter and finish it all, but i feel asleep before i could 😞😞

ANYWAYS!! i find it so funny that throughout the first chapter (and even later chapters, but not as much) its mentioned (and made very obvious) that y/n is a little devil child, that can be too much to handle, but never w megumi. like, idk how to explain it, but hes never thought shes “too much”, and lets her do what she wants, just puts his input in (like when she switched classes, he didnt feel overly annoyed by it, just told her that she was gonna get in trouble) (i might be wrong about this LMAO) youve written them in a way that they balance each other PERFECTLY, like they are genuinely soulmates.

the end scene of the first chapter is oddly one of my favourite parts of the fic, because we get other characters (albeit, minor characters, but wtv) opinions on them, and youve written them exactly like how they describe it. they keep each other in line, and thats why they work so well together.

anyways!!! i love this fanfic so sosososooos much!!! i dont understand how this isnt more popular because???? ITS SO GOOD???? literally how arent people falling in love with your writing within the first 1k words??

(also i meant to include this in a previous ask, but i forgot lol, BUT ONE OF MY FAV DUOS IN THE FIC (and in canon lfmao) is megumi and nobara?? everytime they’re together i genuinely laugh, you nailed their characters and character dynamic)

liar, liar masterlist here:

INCOMING YAP SESSION CUZ THIS ASK GOT ME SUPER DUPER EXCITED KSJSJDIWJ

WEEKLY reread? girl, stop, you’re gonna notice all the typos i cba to get rid of 🫣

HAHAHA, NO STOP, I HAVEN’T HAD ANYONE MENTION THE WHOLE ‘DEVIL CHILD’ THING SINCE THE FIRST TWO CHAPTERS WERE RELEASED 😭 and that, my friend, was months ago 🌝

so i’m so excited to just talk about this omggg!!! 😫💘

yes indeed 😤 megumi would most likely say she’s sm to handle, but really, he lowkey enjoys it. it’s the only time he can be an accomplice witness to such foolish behaviour, and not be reprimanded for it as much ‘cause he just has her to fall back on and blame. he won’t ever stop her, per se, but he’ll tell her once or twice ‘whatever you’re doing, it’s not gonna work’ or ‘don’t be dumb’, and think he’s done his part before being influenced by her 💀

‘i might be wro-’ stfu you’re right and you know it 🙄❤️

and you’re also right in it not being mentioned as much when they’re older. no, i did not forget to add it, that was done intentionally for two reasons:

they’re older now, so as much as she does what she wants with him, she’s a lot more tame than she was as a child. that doesn’t mean she ever regrets the stupid things she’s done (except for the whole mermaid thing, that is a lifelong regret she’ll always have 😭)

the idea that she’s such a menace has been established enough over the years to the point where no one feels the need to voice it. new characters probably would — someone like miss b who was introduced in the middle school chapter — but even then, she was exposed to the more tame versions of the chaotic duo. so everyone kinda silently acknowledges it, and only during crazy moments (like the tragic helicopter incident of 2016, rip satoru/suguru’s will to live 😔) will it actually be voiced (like ogi mistakenly believing that y/n didn’t start any of the nonsense that occurred during the incident, and that was mentioned cuz of the fact that she’s famously known to be so incredibly out of control).

the bonus scene for the first chapter was my fav to write as wellll (tho arguably, i say that about so many scenes, so the value of this statement is probably worth nothing 💀). bonus scenes were initially meant to be ONLY from other people’s pov, but i noticed how so many things from y/n and megumi’s childhood tgth are littered around the story, and that the only way you could ever get any insight of them is through the bonus scene since the chapters are too long to add flashbacks AND bonus scenes. i could always do a separate set of oneshots for them, but i don’t have the time for that (yk this through my horrid updating schedule) 😟

but i am so glad you’re telling me what you enjoyed — and more importantly, being specific about it. it lets me put into perspective how the later chapters (tho already planned) should be set out. your feedback means the world to me, and you deserve a million set of kisses every night for them <3333

‘i love this fanfic sosososo much!!! i don’t understand how this isn’t more popular because??? IT’S SO GOOD???’

okay brb, gonna go and find my right to exist and have the perfect life when cutie pies like you grace this earth 😖💞💓💗💞

maybe one day it’ll get bigger 😊 if that day ever comes, i’ll remember my og readers. i’ll remember the support i was given from them. i’ll remember people like you, who continuously flood my inbox with enough love to pull yank me out of writer’s block and squeeze out another chapter, how because of your long and juicy asks/messages/dms, the cycle of writing i have going on here continues, and i feel more and more proud that i even developed such a fic to begin with ❤️

‘literally how aren’t people falling in love with your writing after the first 1k words’ — errr probably ‘cause the first 1k words were just y/n trying (and failing) to explain what happens in her horror stories without stuttering 💀 LMFAO, SORRY 😭 i’d fall asleep on that carpet if i were the kids surrounding her, and they went to listen willingly.

but ugh, that’s so nice of you, i’m gonna siwjosnwidjwjd

AND OMG YOU’RE SO RIGHT

like everyone talks about yuji/nobara, or yuji/megumi, bUT WHAT ABOUT MY BEANS NOBARA/MEGUMI? they have a level of deep understanding with each other in canon (and in my fic, which will be addressed CHAPTERSSSS later) that i’d love to yap about, but i’ve already yapped enough, like you’re probably cringing rn i’m sorry 😭 another time, maybe 😔

[herofics]

heyyy!! i have a request for Gojo if thats ok. so a GN!student reader that reminds Gojo of teen Geto, such as morals, personality, and a bit of physical looks (eye color). It could either be headcanons, some of the interactions they’ve had, or just etc. but i’ll leave that up to you! ^^

thank you! <3

A/N: Kinda funny, but mostly sad at the same time. I did this with the second years, so the reader is the same age as them. Even though I ship satosugu a lot, in this one they were strictly best friends, because I sorta compared Geto and Gojo’s relationship and Gojo and reader’s relationship

•When Gojo first saw you, it was like this weird flashback that left him speechless and not in a good way

•You didn’t really know how he is normally, since you’re a new student and have never met him before, but you did think the difference in how he treated you vs Maki and the others was a bit odd

•The more he teaches you and gets to know you, the more he keeps thinking back to his time with Suguru

•And the more he notices the similarities between the two of you

•It’s honestly keeping him up at night, because he doesn’t want to let you down, the way he feels he let Suguru down

•He doesn’t think that you’re going to go down the same path of course, and even though the possibility is miniscule he wants to make sure it will not happen

•Gojo’s not sure what to think of you, the way you say things and sometimes even the way you move and gesture, reminds him of Suguru, it’s honestly a whole fucking headache for him

•It’s not like he never thinks of Suguru, he does, a lot, but the fact that you’re so similar, it’s honestly just painful

•He keeps his relationship to you strictly as a teacher and student, but he is kind of nonchalant towards you, more so than anyone else

•Gojo doesn’t want to be cold to you, and it’s not like he lets anyone close anyway, but he is colder towards you than towards Maki, Panda, Inumaki and Yuta

•Of course none of the current student really knew anything about Geto before they met him when he came to declare war

•So that was a bit of a weird experience for you, since you actually look a lot like him

•You still don’t know about his relationship to Gojo of course, but you can sense the tension, it’s pretty obvious to everyone that was there

•Your sense for the dramatic is also kinda similar to Suguru’s and sometimes Gojo doesn’t know if he should laugh or leave the room

•Most of the times he just ends up making an excuse and leaving, or he just teleports the fuck away from there

[littlemissthunderstorms]

gorgeous

alex turner x fem reader

i don’t really know how to summarize it, so just read and find out!! it’ll be a fun little surprise! (also i quoted a line from better than the movies in here, i just finished that book and i LOVED it so dearly)

i couldn’t choose just one song 😣

late afternoon was dull. rain poured outside and the sky was grey, adding to the melancholy of the day. as you sit on the couch next to your best friend alex, you couldn’t help but stare at the rain pattering against the window, trying to distract yourself from your thoughts. you had just recently broken up with your boyfriend, you realized he wasn’t the one and it made you sad. it was easy to let your thoughts spiral, you wondered if you’d ever find your person, if anyone would ever love you that much. could you be loved? you didn’t want to be lonely forever and then become an old lady living alone with her fifty cats in an old apartment. would you die alone? oh my god and then who would even take care of the cats? would anyone even know you died? what if- “ahem.” you jumped slightly, raising your eyebrows at alex who was looking at you with a funny expression, accompanied by a head tilt.

“soo movie or no?” alex chuckled. “you ruined my train of thought.” you smiled as you kicked him playfully. alex had always been your best friend, you had always been there for eachother and this was no different. he’d been hanging out at your house practically the second your boyfriend had moved out and you didn’t mind at all. alex laughed softly, brown eyes not leaving yours. as you gazed at the boy, your smile faded into a frown, your earlier thoughts returning to haunt you. alex noticed this, furrowing his brows. “you alright?” you hadn’t really allowed yourself to overthink too much since your boyfriend left, and now that you had really thought about being alone, it destroyed you. anxiety plagued you, filling you only with distress and thoughts of loneliness.

“i dunno.” you shifted your gaze to your lap, fiddling with your rings. “you wanna talk about it?” alex shuffled closer to you on the couch. you shrugged, eyes still fixated on your lap, averting his gaze. “is it about him?” you noticed how close alex was, causing your heart to race a little faster. “um- no.” you paused. “well, yes, related. i mean, it’s not exactly about him, like the fact that i miss him or anything. which i dont. not really. that seems kinda mean, but it’s true.”

you looked up at alex nervously to find him looking back at you, silently urging you to continue talking. “its just- i’m nervous i’ll never find anyone. sounds fucking stupid now that i’m saying it aloud but um..” you gulped nervously. alex eyes were soft and caring and the effect he had on you right now was concerning. nevertheless, you continued.“i’m scared to be alone forever, i just want to love someone and be loved. and i’m so scared thats not going to happen and i’m scared nobody will ever find me pretty enough to love me. i dont know.” you weren’t even thinking now, the storm of anxiety that occupied your mind now letting loose. “i’m just nervous i guess. i dunno, its silly.” you sighed “maybe i’m just overthinking.”

you kept your gaze on your lap as you finished your rant, too flustered to look at alex. he was close. really close. why was your stomach all swirly? the thunder outside filled the silence for a few moments. alex grabbed your hand, causing you to meet his eyes. “hey. don’t think like that. you’re gorgeous.” the way alex was talking to you, the way he was looking at you, soft brown eyes shimmering in the candlelight, all smiley and sweet. it was getting hard to breathe. you were so distracted by him that you forgot to respond. “thank you.” you muttered pathetically, making him chuckle softly, hand not leaving yours. the house was quiet besides the muffled sound of thunder and rain from the nasty storm outside that was getting more intense by the minute. candles and lamps emitted a soft glow throughout the room, casting faint shadows on the walls.

the way he was looking at you made your heart flutter. your eyes darted down to his lips for a split second before quickly looking back up at his eyes. shit. don’t look at his lips don’t look at his lips. the tension was so thick you were sure lightning was bound to strike between you two any second. the house was too quiet. was he getting closer? you nervously broke eye contact for a split second, your stomach fluttering as you looked back at him. he didn’t move, eyes still locked on yours. your face heated. “um- so what movie did you wanna wat-“you didn’t even finish your sentence before his lips were all over yours, nose pressed into your cheek and hand cupping your face. he kissed you like it was his job and he wanted a raise. you eagerly kissed him back, squeezing his hand tightly as you brought your other hand up to rest on his shoulder. he leaned over you, gently pressing you against the arm of the couch as he kissed the shit out of you. you brought your free hand to grab ahold of his hair, deepening the kiss which elicited a sigh out of him.

the intensity of the kiss increased as a strike of lightning illuminated the sky for a few moments, a loud boom of thunder following, rumbling the ground. you pushed your hand up his shirt, his skin warm. his tongue slid across yours. his hands were in your hair. your leg was wrapped around his waist as the kiss deepened, teeth colliding and soft sighs filling the air. another rumble of thunder shook the ground and just like that, the lights were out. you broke the kiss, the two of you gasping for air. the room was dark, almost pitch black.

and if it weren’t for the soft light of the streetlamps, the glow of the candle in the other room, or the incandescent moonlight, you might’ve not been able to see alex smiling down at you.

⋆.ೃ࿔*:･

hope this made you giggle and kick your feet, goodnight!

ps. this is like my third time writing anything ever so if it’s bad don’t come for me

[gizamalblythe]

Call The Warlords!!

so this takes place in the Wing!au that me @blackcat2907 and @blackholesun321 have been doing, so some prior reading may be required.

(also if this looks poorly written thats because it started as a ramble and i tried to edit it but got tired like, 2/3rds of the way through and said F it we ball.)

((also also i know the seraphim are supposed to be like,,,6-12 ft tall or something but ive known and thought about these babies for far longer than i knew their actual heights so for any thing going forward from me, S-Hawk/Peregrine/Pippin is 4'3 and Sebastian is 4'4 because i think its funny that he's so small))

so in wing!au, and pretty much any iteration, Mihawk is pretty in control of any sort of instincts he has right?

all that gets thrown out the window when he gets an invitation from a mysterious ‘Shaka’ to come and collect something of his on the equally mysterious Egghead Island shortly after his grown chicks fly the coop once more

He gets hit over the head big time with the nesting stick once he lays eyes on ‘S-Hawk 049’ and ‘S-Lion 001’ though.

Mihawk's first thought is that those are terrible names, which is quickly overtaken by ‘i need to get them into the nest as soon as possible’ which is hard because he doesn’t really nest and the only place he would really think of nesting is either home on kurigana, or home on the red force.

the red force is closer, so after some thorough cuddling and introductions/more cuddles, he bundles them both up in a blanket, together of course, and then either picks them up in his arms (given that you can also pick stuff up in your wings to keep your hands free, this is a really touching gesture) and sets off to both avoid interacting with any of the other warlords (because he is a reclusive bastard on a good day and he really does not want to explain anything to anyone right now.) and also to get to the red force as quick as possible.

so, shaka didn’t know that Mihawk and shanks were together, so they each got sent an invitation, but let's say that the news coos have a really hard time getting to Elbaf, or the giants have a really strict screening process, either way the letter was late, so late in fact that shanks didn’t even get the letter until 30 minutes before Mihawk got to the red force ( we’ll expand on that more later)

now shaka was worried because he was banking on all the seraphim being gone by a certain time so when he received no word from the red emperor he began to enact some back up plans, all of them fell through, but he figured he could just kinda dump s-lion on buggy the clown but he hadn’t been able to bring that part of the plan up to the seraphim yet, so they all thought that s-lion was being left behind.

So Mihawk and the other Warlords, both new and old (excluding Blackbeard because he wasn’t relevant and Doflamingo because he was both in prison and Shaka did not trust this man with a child) arrive on Egghead where they meet Doctor Vegapunk-01 ‘Shaka’.

After initial introductions are finished, and an explanation and reassurances are given, Shaka starts guiding them towards a meeting area to meet the seraphim. Mihawk however, notices a large amount of nervous energy, separate from the waiting figures ahead of them. This, along with how familiar the presence seems, intrigues Hawkeyes so he decides to split off and investigate. 

When Mihawk walks into the training dojo, he sees S-Hawk training his swordsmanship. He spoke up once the boy had finished his katas and noted to him that while his ability to mimic his technique was admirable, it clearly lacked the foundation the basics provided. 

He showed the seraphim the basics, they practiced a bit, S-Hawk became emotional and blew up a bit out of frustration and lack of understanding on why he was being so nice to him then proceeded to break down crying. Mihawk sat patiently during the outburst, then wrapped his wings around them as he hugged the child comfortingly during the crying jag, and stood up with S-Hawk in his arms and picked up the younger's sword (which he attached to his belt because mediocre imitation or not it is still his first sword!) and then began walking through the halls to the exit.

At one of the intersections, S-Hawk meekly asked if He could take his brother too. Mihawk questioned if he was another clone of him , to which S-Hawk says he's a clone of an Emperor. Mihawk agrees and during the walk to the mysterious brothers room, the raven haired man goes over in his head who it could be.

‘Can't be Linlin because he said brother, so that leaves Kaido, Edward Newgate and-’

Conqueror Class Seraphim: S-Lion 001

‘Shanks’

so on the trip to the red force is filled with lots more cuddles and some explaining: 

where they were going,

(Elbaf)

Why, 

(that is one of the safest places Mihawk can think of to nest) 

Who is there, 

(his mate) 

How will they react to the newly named Sebastian considering he doesn’t share any dna with Mihawk and instincts will not like that,

(he will probably react quite well, considering that while you don't share dna with me, you do share dna with him) 

How will he react to the newly named Peregrine seeing as it can be easily taken as infidelity on Mihawks' part,

(he's not one to judge based on that because he knows that I love him)

Will he like us? 

(he will love you)

SO arriving at the red force, somehow Mihawk is completely unnoticed. strange but whatever, (this is because most of the senior officers and shanks are in a war meeting rn trying to decide who goes to go get whatever it is that THE Dr Vegapunk want to give them) so Mihawk just makes his way to Shanks’ room (very grateful to the lack of presence because his instincts are screaming at him to get the chicks to the nest NOW and being seen will not help with that) so he gets to Shanks’ room to find that it is laundry day so he sets the Eyas down on the bed, tells them he will be right back and books it to the laundry room where he is finally seen, he gathers a bunch of bedding and soft blankets and at least one of shanks’ throw blankets that isn’t really dirty but hasn’t been washed yet and just leaves without acknowledging anybody, someone tells a cabin boy to tell Shanks that ‘Hey, Mihawk is here and he's nesting. jsyk’

So Shanks gets the call that Mihawk is here and nesting which is slightly concerning because Mihawk doesn’t really nest, and he can't ask Ben for advice because Ben left half an hour ago to check out Vegapunk’s thing. So he goes to his room to investigate, to which he finds Mihawk, in the middle of a nest of pillows and blankets and nestled right there next to him, are two tiny chicks, both with white hair and tan skin, one looks like Mihawk, and the other…. looks like him!

he gently shakes Mihawk out of his baby-bliss-napping and asks “as wonderful and as overjoyed I am,,,,, where’d you find these adorable babies?” Mihawk explains and Shanks says that he’ll be right back to join in the cuddles, he’s just gotta get Ben on the den den and tell them that they can come back because Mihawk already beat them to it.

@manofbeskar enjoy some baby acquisition.

[psychip7]

So, Surf and Turf Wars pt. 2 just dropped, and I’d like to do a mini-review again, just like I did for the first part.

I try to be as unbiased as possible when it comes to reviewing these, as I don’t want to have an “old good, new bad” mindset. I like legacy, and it’s quite different from the classic era. So I try to give everything a fair chance.

and now for the actual review:

_

5.5/10

Yeah, once again, like my first review…it’s just alright. The whole “lobster monster Matt” wasn’t really to my taste comedy-wise. The whole “big monster does big monster stuff” isn’t really funny to me.

And I feel like this eddisode suffered from separating the guys. I feel like the way Tom and Edd are written in beyond isn’t entertaining enough to carry long scenes where it’s just them. (Which *might* be kind of controversial? Maybe. Because I know a lot of people liked their scenes together in part 1.) But, even so, the two of them are sidelined HARD in this and I’m not even sure why.

Also…I’m not a fan of how many jokes are relegated to random one-off characters. Like, I’m here for the guys. Not randoms. And yes, I know that both past eras of eddsworld had jokes with one-off characters. But they were using pretty sparingly, and never felt like it took away from the comedy.

Not to mention that both of the ongoing plots: the Matt plot, and the Tom and Edd plot…were both a bit stale. Both plots didn’t really end in any satisfying way. It’s was pretty anticlimactic. If it were up to me, I would’ve just had Matt be with Edd and Tom on the beach doing the competitions. The eddsworld guys work great when they’re all together. Plus…lobster Matt doesn’t even interact with Edd and Tom?? What’s the point then?

And all the jokes were very…meh. I’m just gonna accept at this point that Matt’s writing style isn’t my cup of tea.

OKAY. I know I just tore into this eddisode pretty harshly, but there are some nice positives and improvements that I noticed.

-Better pacing. The first part, imo, had really strange and awkward pacing. Like it was so sluggish at points, but also moved too fast sometimes. But that’s been remedied somewhat in the second part, and I like that.

-Less awkward: By “less awkward”, I mean there’s more music. Something thats bugged me about the beyond eps is that they felt awkward and quiet due to lack of music. But there’s more music now, yay.

-Montage. I liked the montage scene. Very eddsworld.

-Sonic popsicle on the ice cream truck. Because I’m massive sonic trash.

-

SO…yeah. That’s the review. Sorry if this is formatted shittily, I did it on my phone in a hurry, lol. And if you happen to have different opinions on this eddisode, totally cool.

Kinda sucks that pretty much all of beyond hasn’t been what I’d hoped. Everyone else is enjoying it though, and I can’t help but feel like squidward looking out the window in that one meme. 😭 I wanna like it so bad, but I just can’t. Beaster bunny, and the surf and turf pt. 1 and 2 have both just been misses for me.

…Also, Matt doesn’t like icecream. What’s up with that?

[skzfanf1cs]

Stray Kids Academy - Chapter 7 : I Need A Cold Shower

Series Masterlist

Main Pairing [This Chapter} : Han Jisung / Original Male Character

Warnings : sexually explicit content, blowjob, vaginal fingering, they get cockblocked hardcore

Word Count : 5,087

Ezekiel Mitchell

It was the Monday after the wild party we had at the music nerds’ house. Jisung hasn’t texted me all weekend, though I haven’t texted him either. I was scared he actually remembered everything and hated me.

Everything seemed so tense the past weekend after the party with Levi and Seungmin’s drama. But, everything finally got sorted out.

I was currently rolling down the sidewalk on my skateboard towards the cafe. I still needed my caffeine fix before class and I needed the energy to even think about what to say to Jisung.

I opened the door and rolled inside - Levi sent a glare my way. I tried to stop when I saw a familiar head of brown hair, but my mental functions short-circuited. Before I rolled right into him, he turned and - with reflexes I’ve never seen on him before - grabbed onto my biceps to steady me before I fell on my face like a fool.

“Whoa, easy there.” He gave me a bright smile. Once he figured I wouldn’t fall, he let me go. Though, I would’ve been fine if he held onto me forever. “Hi.”

“Hey.” I smiled at him before kicking up my skateboard and catching it in my hand. “I guess I should learn to not run into you like that.”

“I don’t mind.” He blurted out before covering his mouth. “Geez, that was embarrassing.” He mumbled as he averted his eyes.

“So, what I’m hearing is that I can run into you anything?” I winked.

His eyes widened slightly as a small blush made its way to his cheeks. Then, he looked me in the eyes. “A-Anyway, sorry for not texting you. I was honestly sleeping off my hangover.”

My smile widened slightly. Honestly, it made me feel a little better knowing he wasn’t ignoring me. “It’s all good. It was a crazy night.”

“So I’ve heard.” He rubbed the back of his neck. So, he really didn’t remember anything.

“I’ll tell you about it sometime.” I offered.

“I’ll hold you to that.” He laughed. “I tend to do stupid things when I drink a lot like that.”

“Why were you drinking so much anyway?” I asked, though I felt like I wouldn’t get an answer, or a truthful one at least.

“It’s kinda embarrassing.” He averted his eyes.

“You don’t have to tell me.” I blurted out. “I mean, not unless you want to.”

He looked deep in thought. “How about this…let’s have an exchange of information. You fill me in on what happened that night. And I’ll tell you why I drank so much. Sound fair?”

I nodded. “Yeah. You name the time and place.”

He gave me a small smile before looking down at his watch. “Okay, it’s a date.” His eyes widened slightly and his face gained color. “O-Or, a plan! It’s a plan…I gotta go.” Then, he walked past me and out of the cafe.

“That was painful to watch.” Levi said from behind the counter.

“So painful.” Jeongin echoed.

~~~~~

Throughout the day, I slowly forgot about our conversation. I had just gotten home from work that afternoon when I felt my phone buzz in my pocket. I brought it out and smiled at the message.

Jisung : how about we hang out tonight?

Me : absolutely!

Me : its a date. or a plan haha

Jisung : we can hang out at your place if thats okay?

Jisung : mine is a little crowded

Me : cant wait mon amour ;)

Jisung : see you at 7 <3

I wasn’t expecting him to send a heart, but I wasn’t complaining. I was laying on the couch, kicking my feet. I didn’t notice Levi was staring at me till I heard her laugh. “What are you doing?”

“Jisung texted me a heart emoji.” I stated, matter-of-factly. “We are gonna hang out tonight.”

“You’re so gay, it’s not even funny.” She moved my legs out of the way to take a place on the couch next to me. “I’m surprised you guys aren’t being awkward, especially after the party.”

I sat up and brought my knees up to my chest. “Oh, he actually was so drunk he doesn’t remember any of it.”

“What?” She turned her body towards me. “Are you going to tell him?”

“I said I would…but…” I trailed off.

“He has a right to know.” Levi stated. “You can cry about it, but then you gotta admit your mistakes and move on.”

“I don’t want to be a mistake though.” I put my forehead against my knees. “But, you’re right. I’ll tell him. I couldn’t lie about it anyway.” She patted my shoulder. “Also, I’m gonna need you girls to leave for a couple hours.”

Han Jisung

I was currently face-down on my bed, face in my pillow, kicking my feet. I can’t believe I suggested we hang out so soon, then send a heart emoji. Since when did I get so bold?

I needed to get ready.

I went to my closet and started going through my shirts, trying to find something more comfortable to wear than my sweater. I found one of my favorite hoodies and baggy pants. I stripped off my sweater and went to pull the hoodie over my head.

But, my eye caught something in the reflection of Felix’s vanity mirror across the room. I stepped closer to get a closer look. There was a bruise on my collarbone. It looked a few days old. Maybe I got it at the party? I was probably too hung over to notice it till now too.

I finished changing before going downstairs and found Minho on the couch, holding one of his cats in his arms and watching TV.

“Hey, Minho?” I asked him as I sat next to him on the couch. His cat, Dori, got startled and jumped out of Minho’s arms. He sighed at the loss of his cat and glared over at me. “What?”

“Did I somehow get hurt at the party last weekend?”

Instead of continuing his glare, he looked more confused. “No? Why?”

“Well, I found this bruise.” I pulled down the collar of my hoodie to show him.

He squinted, leaning in closer to get a better look. Then, he burst into laughter. “Dude, that’s a hickey.”

I choked on air. I had a violent coughing fit while Minho patted my back. “What? No…when? Who?”

Minho pinched the bridge of his nose. “At the party. You got super drunk and started making out with Zeke.”

My face heated up. “No way. I think I would’ve remembered that…right?”

Minho brought out his phone and started scrolling through his photos. Then, he showed me his screen. It was a video. It showed Zeke talking to Brittney, then I walked over before I put my arm around his shoulders. Then, the me in the video grabbed onto his chin, leaned in close, and kissed him. Brittney stomped off and we continued making out against the wall. After a while, I whispered something to him before we made our way upstairs. The video ended.

“You just filmed us?” I asked, hiding my face in my hands. “Did…did we-”

“No.” Minho cut me off while putting his phone away. “Chan and Levi stopped you before anything could get that far. And, yeah. I filmed you for blackmail. And cause I knew you’d never believe that it actually happened.”

I folded in on myself, my forehead on my knees as I groaned. “We were supposed to hand out tonight.”

“And you still are.” Minho patted my back. “You guys need to talk about it.”

“I know, but…” I mumbled. “I don’t think I can face him.”

“If it makes you feel any better, I’m sure you gave him a hickey too.”

“Why would that make me feel better?” I sat up and raised my voice. “That’s the opposite of making me feel better!”

He raised his hand in defense. “Whoa. Calm down, you’re acting crazy.”

I pinched the bridge of my nose. “That is the exact opposite of what you’re supposed to say.”

“Yeah, but now you’re not yelling at me anymore.” He patted my shoulder. “See, I helped.”

I just rolled my eyes and stood up. “I’m just going to go.”

~~~~~

It wasn’t long until I made it to the Mitchell’s apartment that I got super embarrassed again. I couldn’t bring myself to knock on the door. Luckily - or unluckily - I didn’t have to worry about it. The door swung open to reveal the Mitchell twins being pushed out by Zeke. They waved and gave me a quick hello and goodbye before leaving the apartment.

“What was that about?” I asked as I watched their disappearing forms.

“I told them they had to leave.” Zeke said it like it was the most obvious thing in the world. “I figured you wouldn’t want anyone else here while we talked.”

He opened the door wider, giving me room to walk into the Mitchell apartment. I was then led to the couch as he sat down next to me. Then, there was an awkward silence.

“So-” We said at the same time.

“You go first.” I said, smiling at him.

“No, you go first.” Zeke said, which was sweet, but I didn’t want to go first. But, I had the feeling we’d go back and forth all night if I didn’t go first.

I took a deep breath. “So, I guess we should talk about that night, huh?” When Zeke nodded, I took another deep breath. “I uh…I drank so much because, and this is embarrassing to admit…I needed the courage to talk to you.”

His eyes widened slightly, but it softened with a small smile. “Mon Amour, why would you need the courage to talk to me? We talk all the time.”

Oh, if only he knew. “I just needed to…anyway, enough about me. What did you want to tell me?” I tried to take the attention off of me.

Zeke flinched slightly. “Well, if I tell you, you gotta tell me why you actually needed too much liquid courage. Deal?”

I nodded. It honestly wasn’t fair on my part. I already knew what he was going to tell me. But, part of me wanted to know if he would tell the truth. I trusted him to tell everything, but for some reason, the voice in the back of my head tells me that he would lie. I just needed to know.

“Well, I also drank a lot. I wanted to find you, but I couldn’t find you at all. So, the longer I couldn’t find you, the more I drank. Eventually, Brittney caught up to me and started flirting with me.” He then averted his eyes. “I’m assuming you don’t remember this next part so…anyway, you came up and intervened. Honestly, saved me the trouble of turning her down again.”

He took a deep breath before continuing. “We kinda…made out a bit. And…we went upstairs.” Then, he looked up at me again. “We didn’t do anything, don’t worry. Chan and Levi stopped us.”

He put his head in his hands. “God, I don’t know. I felt like an ass when Chan told me you didn’t remember anything. Believe me, I wouldn’t have done anything if I knew you’d forget. It was the first time I kissed you, I wanted you to remember.”

My face was on fire. I honestly didn’t know how to react, my brain froze. Luckily, my body had other plans.

I gently grabbed onto his wrists, pulling his hand away from his face. He looked at me in surprise, but I kept going. I grabbed onto his face, pulled him close, and kissed him. It was soft, but over too fast. I came to my senses and quickly backed away.

“I’m so sorry.” I started. “I shouldn’t assume-”

He grabbed me by my hoodie collar and pulled me in to kiss me again. This kiss was more desperate as he tilted his head to deepen the kiss. His hands went to the back of my head to keep me in place as my hands went to rest on his chest. 

He eventually pulled away and rested his forehead on mine. My heart was beating in my ears as I let out a breath I didn’t know I was holding. But, I couldn’t help but smile.

Zeke brought one hand from the back of my head to caress my cheek. “Talk to me, Mon Amour. What’s going on in that head of yours?”

I cleared my throat and leaned back a bit so I could fully look at him. “I have to confess, Minho actually told me what happened before I got here. Not that I didn’t think you wouldn’t tell me, but I found this.” I lowered my hoodie collar to reveal the hickey.

Zeke opened his mouth, then closed it. Then he started to speak as he rubbed the side of his neck. “In my defense…” He paused as he stopped rubbing his neck. There on his neck was a sizable bruise. “You gave me this.”

I wanted to hide my face, I was so embarrassed I did that. But, another part of me felt prideful that I actually did that. Then, I confessed. “I needed the courage to talk to you because I like you a lot. And you looked so good that night, I really needed to loosen up. But, I obviously drank too much, so I couldn’t remember anything.”

Zeke averted his eyes slightly. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner. I was just worried you’d hate me if you found out.”

I pressed my hand up against his, that was still firmly placed on my cheek. “I could never hate you.”

He looked back to my eyes and gave me a smirk, which made my heart flutter. “Well, you did say you liked me. And, I think I’ve made it pretty obvious that I like you too.”

I laughed lightly. My stomach was full of butterflies. “Please tell me this isn’t a dream.”

His smirk grew wider. “Just how often do you dream about me?”

I was about to protest, but he pulled me close and softly kissed me. In a way, I was grateful. I didn’t need to stumble my way around a lie. Of course I dreamt about Zeke. Some dreams were short and sweet, others…not so innocent. But, I didn't need him to know that.

He pulled away and had a small, sweet smile on his face. “Why don’t you stay for a bit? Luna and Levi won’t be back for a few hours. I’d hate to kick you out after basically confessing my undying love for you.” He joked.

“Is that what you call an ‘undying love’ confession?” I joked back, though my face was basically on fire again.

“Are you saying my confession wasn’t flawless? Rude.”

“No, no.” I quickly hugged him and put my ear against his chest. Despite the cool act he put on, his heart was beating out of his chest. I smiled. “It’s definitely a confession to remember.”

Ezekiel Mitchell

After my weak confession - but Jisung liked it, so I guess it’s a win - we decided to cuddle on the couch and watch a movie. After all, I told my sisters to leave for a few hours. Might as well use them wisely. Well, I’d honestly be happy with making out for the next few hours, but he was obviously too embarrassed. But cuddling and watching a movie was good too.

Halfway through the movie, Jisung had fallen asleep. His head rested on my lap, his face in my stomach as his arms wrapped around my waist. I played with his hair as he slept and I finished the movie. I didn’t want to wake him up, so I played a different movie while I waited for him to wake up on his own.

Jisung started stirring halfway through the second movie. His arms that were around my waist tightened slightly as he groaned. I chuckled and continued playing with his hair. “You awake, Mon Amour?”

He hummed in response and turned his head, looking up at me through half-lidded eyes. Then, his eyes suddenly widened as a blush made its way up to his cheeks. He suddenly got up, backed away from me, and brought his knees up to his chin.

“I gotta go.” He blurts out.

“Whoa, it must’ve been a great dream.” I joked. When Jisung stayed silent and hid his face in his knees, my eyes widened slightly. “Oh, did you?” Then, I started word-vomiting. “Cause that’s cool, it happens. It happens to me all the time. Granted, I don’t have a dick so maybe it’s not the same for me…wow, that was probably the worst thing to say right now.” Then, I clamped my mouth shut.

Jisung kept his face hidden. He didn’t say anything.

I suddenly had an idea. “I can help you out, if you want?”

“What?” He raised his head to look at me.

“With your problem. I can help you out.”

He widened his eyes slightly, but he looked like he was considering it. He took another minute to think, to the point where I thought he’d decline. I was about to apologize and laugh it off when he let out a quiet, “Okay.”

I smirked as I stood up before standing in front of him. I leaned down to gently lower his legs from against his chest. All my movements were slow, just so he had time to back out whenever he felt too uncomfortable.

My eyes widened slightly and my mouth started to water at the sight of the very noticeable bulge in his jeans. I got down on my knees in front of him, my hands going to his waist, playing with the waistband of his jeans. I bit my bottom lip as I went to unbutton and unzip his pants. My fingertips grabbed at the waistband of his boxers before pulling it down enough to release his cock.

I licked my lips as I looked Jisung in the eyes. “Are you sure this is okay?”

His breath hitched slightly at my question, but he nodded. His hands clenched the cushions of the couch, his pupils blown as he looked down at me with half-lidded eyes.

His breath caught in his throat when I touched his dick with my hand, gently wrapping it around the shaft before slowly stroking it. His breath started to quicken as I moved my hand slightly faster.

The moan that left his lips when I finally placed my mouth on the tip of his cock was downright vulgar, and I couldn’t get enough of it.

I almost laughed to myself. We’ve kinda made things official only an hour or so ago, made out for the first time - sober, I might add - and here I was, sucking his dick.

His hands then found their way to my hair, gripping at the strands and slightly tugging. I slowly took more of him into my mouth, making him groan louder.

Han Jisung

Holy fuck, this was a dream right? This seemed way too good to be true. But, my dreams never felt so real and so so good. So, it had to be real, right?

Zeke slowly kept taking more and more of me into his mouth and the grip I had on his hair tightened. It was all I could do to keep from bucking my hips up into his warm mouth. When he finally took me fully into his mouth, he slowly started bobbing his head up and down at an agonizingly slow pace.

I bit my bottom lip to try and stop my moans from filling the room. It worked for a while until he started picking up his pace. He hollowed his cheeks out and his tongue started to roll around the tip. Zeke’s hands went back to my waist and his thumbs went to rub circles on my hip bones.

I couldn’t stop myself from leaning back, my head rolling back against the back of the couch, my eyes fluttering closed. At this point, I didn’t try to hold back my moans.

“F-Fuck, baby…just like that.” I breathed out. I spoke without thinking. I snapped my head forward when I felt his mouth leave my cock, making me whine from the loss of contact. “Why’d you stop?”

Zeke wiped the saliva from his lips before smirking. “You just sound really hot when you talk like that.” I was about to say something, but it came out as a gasp when he started stroking me again with his hand. “But, you sound a lot hotter when you moan for me.”

“Sh-Shut up.”

I watched as he took me back into his mouth. He started by sucking on the tip before taking me fully into his mouth again. I absolutely lost it when he looked up at me through his eyelashes. My grip on his hair tightened as I forcefully moved his head up and down, as fast as I needed. His grip on my hips tightened, his nails digging into my skin.

I kept going till I could feel my climax coming. I tried hard not to fold in on myself as it came fast and hard, a loud groan coming from my mouth. My grip on his hair finally loosened. It really didn’t occur to me that I came into his mouth till he popped his mouth off of me.

“Oh, shit. I’m so-”

I cut myself off when I saw him cover his mouth with the back of his hand and swallow.

Fuck, that was hot.

My hands went from his head to grab onto the collar of his shirt before I pulled him up to me. I crashed my lips to his, tilting my head to deepen the kiss.

Zeke placed his hands on my face before running his tongue along my lips. I opened my mouth and let his tongue tangle with mine, tasting myself on his tongue.

I twisted my body so I went to fall back onto the couch, pulling Zeke on top of me, our lips never leaving the other. He placed his knees on either side of my hips, his elbows on either side of my head, making sure he doesn’t crush me under him.

I wrapped my leg around his waist and wrapped my arms around his neck, pulling him closer. As we separated, my hands went to the back of his shirt collar and pulled the fabric over his head, leaving his top half exposed.

“You’re so fucking perfect.” He breathed out as he went to attack my neck with his lips.

I sighed and tilted my head to give him more access. My hands went to trace the outlines of his chest, before going lower to his jeans. My fingers started playing with the buckle of his belt.

I wanted to touch him so badly, make him feel good like he did for me. And continues to do. He pulled the collar of my hoodie to the side before biting down on my shoulder, making me let out a loud moan.

My hands sped up, unbuckling his belt before going to unbutton and unzip his jeans. I stuck my hand into the waistband of his boxers and I rubbed my fingers against his fold. And, fuck, he was already wet.

I rubbed my pointer finger against his clit, making him gasp and pant against my shoulder. He started placing open-mouthed kisses against my shoulder and neck as I continued rubbing my finger against him.

“God, I want you so badly right now.” He mumbled against my throat. He let out a moan as I moved my hand further down, till I stuck my finger inside him, my thumb now doing circles around his clit. My other hand went to the waistband of his jeans and started to pull them down. If I could just get these stupid jeans off-

My eyes widened as I heard the front door click open and the collective gasps. “Whoa, okay.” Levi said as she went to quickly close the door. “I’m gonna give you guys a minute to collect yourselves, then we’ll come in again.”

Zeke groaned in annoyance against my neck. I was frozen. I had completely forgotten that I still had my hand down his pants.

“Hey, as great as this is…I’m gonna need you to take your hand back.” Zeke smirked down at me. I was careful not to retract my hand too quickly. He got off of me and redid his jeans and belt, then bent down to grab his shirt. He looked over at me again and smirked wider. “You also might want to put your dick back in your pants before they come back in.”

I quickly sat up and readjusted myself. My face was so warm. I looked up to see Zeke had already pulled his shirt back on, slightly disappointed.

“No need to pout, Mon Amour.” He leaned down and cupped my face in his hands before leaning in close to my ear. “Next time, I’ll make sure we won’t get interrupted.”

Then, he kissed below my ear and backed away before his sisters opened the door again. I couldn’t look any of them in the eyes.

“I’m assuming your talk went well?” Luna asked. I saw her smirk from the corner of my eye. I covered my face again.

“I should go.” I blurted out. “I-It’s getting late anyway, so…”

“I can walk you home.” Zeke offered.

“N-No, it’s okay.” I tried to offer him a reassuring smile as I took his hand and squeezed it. “I’ll text you when I make it home.”

He nodded, not wanting to push it. In truth, if he walked me home, I might end up jumping him in the nearest alleyway and finish what we started.

I let go of his hand and started making my way towards the front door, keeping my head low as I passed by his sisters.

The walk home was uneventful. I blasted my music on my earbuds as I walked, trying to take my mind off of everything for a while. But, my mind kept going back to the events of the last hour. How pretty he looked with my cock in his mouth as he looked up at me. How amazing he looked with his shirt off. How hot he sounded when he moaned for me.

I needed a cold shower.

As I walked into the house, I was immediately bombarded with questions from Minho. “How did it go? Did it go well? I’m assuming it did, you’ve been gone for hours. Why is your face red? Did something happen?” Then, he paused and squinted before pulling my collar down more. “Is that a new hickey?”

I immediately covered my face and groaned as I fell onto the couch and laid there, wishing I could just die. I felt Minho pat my leg, signaling me to move so he could sit next to me. Reluctantly, I sat up and pulled my knees to my chest.

“So…new hickey.” He poked me in the shoulder. “I’m assuming it went good.”

“It went great, actually.” I blurted out.

“Great?” He raised an eyebrow. “Did you have sex?”

“No!” I covered my face with my knees. And I started mumbling everything to him. How we kissed, kinda confessed actually. I fell asleep during our movie and had a wet dream. Zeke helping me with my problem. Us slowly making our way towards having sex on the couch. And then his sisters walking in.

Minho was trying hard not to laugh, I could tell. But, he patted my shoulder, making me look up at him. “He’s good with his mouth, isn’t he?” He gave me a knowing look.

Oh, right. They used to date. I keep forgetting that.

I hid my face again. “Yeah…he is.”

Ezekiel Mitchell

“What was that?” Levi had us sitting in our usual gossip circle with wine glasses in our hands. “You know our rule, no fucking on the couch.”

“I don’t remember agreeing to that rule.” I smirked as I took a sip of my wine. I totally would’ve fucked him on that lumpy couch. “Why didn’t you stay out longer anyway?”

“It was getting late, what did you want us to do?” Levi asked. “We weren’t gonna walk the streets all night just so you could get dicked down.”

“Anyway.” Luna interrupted. “I think we know the really important questions that actually need to be answered.” Luna and Levi shared a look before looking back at me. “How far did you go? Was the dick good at least?”

I couldn’t help but laugh. Of course this was information they wanted to know. “I mean, I sucked his dick, we made out, he fingered me. Almost got my pants off too. And, if I might say, it was pretty good.” Then, I frowned at them. “Would’ve been a lot better if I got further than that!”

“There’s always next time, right?” Luna finished her glass before reaching for the bottle. “Assuming we didn’t scare him off.”

My phone vibrated in my pocket. I took it out to see I got a message from Jisung.

Jisung : i made it home safe

Jisung : i also had a really good time tonight

Jisung : lets do it again sometime

Jisung : without interruptions hopefully

Me : absolutely. nothing would make me happier

Me : <3

Jisung : <3

I let out a sigh of relief. They didn’t scare him off. And it seemed like he wanted me as much as I wanted him. I couldn’t help but smile.

We ended our little gossip session shortly after. It was getting really late and we had classes in the morning. But, I kept tossing and turning. My mind kept going back to earlier. How his cock felt in my mouth. When he smashed his lips to mine and pulled me on top of him. How his fingers felt against me.

I needed a cold shower.

~~~~~

Throughout the week, Jisung and I would sneak kisses in between classes. Unfortunately for us, our schedules didn’t line up to meet up after classes or work. I was slowly getting more annoyed since Levi and Luna had cockblocked us at the beginning of the week.

So, when Levi showed up at the apartment after Chan’s tattoo appointment, I knew I needed to return the favor.

[crackedpumpkin]

Ohmygod bro good job getting your coffee cause I would’ve barely survived that too!!! Good looking people in general really just be paralyzing people for some reason 😭

Cafe hopping really is fun tho, now that I think about it I have a similar story too with fumbling words. I went to this craft store for the first time and was tryna look for string cause I wanted to make those necklace bottle things, I asked the two people working in English, and since they had a hard time communicating with me they literally ran to another working person then running back to find me in the small shop! I didn’t get string in the end but I got the bottle! Could’ve avoided that if I just spoke my native language- but I didn’t cause adults (the older ones in my family) usually made fun of me for it 😭

The little moments really make the big things!! Both of you, amazing writers, no lie. I’ve been thinking of writing too so is it okay if I ask what the advice was? /nf

Michael gets arc’d! No more chip docking! But genuinely based of you to put that much care into your characters and stories 💖

Yes please I didn’t even know fruit-ade is an actual word- I was just making things up-

i aspire to one day be that pretty.

Please the way I wheezed- fr though, never be afraid to speak your own native language! My second language is Chinese and I am horrible at speaking it under pressure. I even got laughed at by my boss - that's how bad it was lmaooo, but honestly i don't really care. I'm just happy it makes people smile and laugh at it alongside me^^

As for the advice given by blake, it was focusing about the small things that led up to the big moment! This is purely my own interpretation though, but essentially always justify their actions. For example, if i make babes fall for miles outta nowhere then it's a little sudden, right? There's gotta be some form of catalyst that caused it in the first place.

Especially in the situation theyre currently in. Neither are entirely sure what they are yet, besides employer and employee. Before even progressing to being lovers and stuff they gotta form some kinda bond first, right? So the main thing for me was how to justify each step in their relationship.

Aka, is it reasonable for them to warm up to each other by this stage?? Or are they still on rocky terms with each other? It's honestly a fun challenge for me to write, because it gives me a chance to put myself in their shoes more thoroughly.

Even irl, there's gotta be a catalyst to make you fall for someone in the first place, right? Maybe one day you notice their eyes are really nice, or maybe you like the way their laugh sounds. Even before that, it's the little things that they do to make you feel safe in the first place :) relationships dont form overnight, after all~

"i would need to read the full thing through but a good rule of thumb for progression is either feeling it out and reasoning through if their reactions make sense or making it clear that time has passed between chapters and giving it a little suspension of disbelief" - @buthowboutno-spamming

bro, when you start writing please tag me in it!! I would love to read your work, and i know you can do it!! Honestly take it from me - dont take things too seriously. Writing is meant to be fun, not stressful. Like, when blank canvas started out it was just for shits and giggles and goofy and fun. thats what i was aiming for the whole time, and i wanted people who read my fic to hopefully smile or even do the lil nose huff thing we all do when we find something on the internet funny ^^

I'll add on a little advice of my own - feel free to ignore it lolol, but essentially:

I find it really helpful to have some form of plan or outline for your fic. Mine s constantly being adjusted, but it helps so much when you write your chapter and maybe realize oh wait iwanna do this here and do that there, and you know where everything should go like a puzzle piece! Something else I'd say is that there doesnt always have to be drama lmao, sometimes a sweet heartwarming fic is enough. You're enough.

Again, the little moments matter, right? That's why in chapter five i just kinda did a little hangout session :)

And omg when i say i am thrilled to write michael's character arc fr. an eureka moment hit me outta nowhere and immediately i RAN to tell @theblindhag because she has been honestly nothig but supportive and an absolutely lovely human bean. Which also kinda reminds me: having a good friend listen to all the crazy ideas in your head is so amazing fr, and i hope you have/will find that friend. Honestly, feel free to send in asks whenever - id be more than happy to have a chat or chill out!

I'll make a post on the fruitade soon, its like 1am where i am rn lmao. keep your eyes peeled for it anon!! it's the actual easiest to make, trust.

As a little bonus extra, allow me to share a little moment from upcoming chapters :)

[tiredelirium]

D.1

Sometimes I want to write about how I feel.

Sometimes I want others to read it.

But most of the time I don’t actually know if I even want anything at all.

I wonder if people I know talk about me when they’re bored or even just making conversation. If they’re mean about me. If they’re curious about me.

I’ve never been very good at interacting with others in the long term. Currently relationships don’t exist for me really. There’ve been times I’ve tried with friendships and partners, but it never seems honest or real.

One sided might seem too harsh.

I know others have tried to reach out, but I’m bad at accepting that hand.

Even now, its 2 AM on a Wednesday, oh though I guess that makes it Thursday now, and here I am writing thoughts out loud on a Tumblr as if i’m making any sense.

To anyone reading this, don’t start to get the wrong idea about what i’m doing with this. (You know who you are and how you think.) I’m just airing out the hollows of my mind and heart.

People (hopefully plural) talk to themselves all the time, in different ways. Maybe their mind races a mile a minute and the only way they can think clearly is to speak out loud. Maybe they speak so that they can better visualise their thoughts as they do so. Maybe its easier to find answers if you speak out loud.

So thats what this is.

Me speaking out loud.

I don’t have anything going for me, that’s the truth from my own perspective.

Self doubt. Body dysmorphia. Introversion. Disappointment. Sadness. Regret. It’s all there, buried beneath a smile i maintain for my parents, sisters, nieces and nephews. Something I’d never show them because it would worry them.

Its funny, I only really started to notice the fake smile I put on for others when I started work, which I was late to getting too. Most everyone would call that a fortune, not having to work for so long, but it stunted me I think. I mean, my lack of personal skills is clear as day to me anyway, though that could be the self doubt talking. Silences in communication drag on for so long. Others try to fill the void but all I can offer is an affirmation, a made up lie, or a smile that feels so fraudulent I want to down an entire beer just to see if that brings up something real. Inhibitions gone.

I don’t want to disappoint others, but trying feels false. And that leads to not trying at all. Which leads to relationships collapse, or a drift apart so long that no amount of bravery could see me reaching out to close that gap.

Around mid college, a foundation year, I started going out with a girl in my class. We were kinda forced together by other classmates we were close to, but it wouldn’t be a lie to say I liked her and I considered her a friend I got to know over a handful of months. We were into a lot of the same stuff, some bands, some games, some art. It made sense to try going out, but the first move was made when we were drunk. A kiss on a couch in a bar at 2AM with our friends watching us from around the corner.

Then university came. We went to different places, having already made decisions and had interviews long before we started dating. She asked me if I wanted us to keep dating, and I agreed. I liked her. It made sense, despite the distance between the places we’d go. And it was far.

University had its ups and downs, though I had far more downs. The course I chose was mostly because I had no interest in anything else and was uncertain. Art is subjective, it always will be, even if you produce something thats sympathetic to the masses doesn’t mean it’ll sell well or earn a living. My girlfriend was brilliant at art, and knew what she wanted to make. I was below average at best and though I had ideas nothing ever came out the way I intended it too.

Distance was hard. But it worked for us. We made time for eachother, perhaps too much time honestly. I don’t really know if she made any long lasting friends in her class outside of her flatmates. I know I didn’t, but thats a me condition I think. We visited each other during breaks, whether it was meeting up halfway or one of us visiting the other, it was always great to see her.

But.

I messed up.

After university, I struggled a lot with direction. My final grade was nowhere near good enough to guarantee any kind of role anywhere significant if I’d made connections. At the end of the day my lack of efforts weren’t even good enough to matter and I spent the majority of my second and third year playing catchup. I technically failed that course. Because of a single essay marked by someone who failed me by a single point and cost my entire second year grade. An essay i’d been told by the tutor who helped me write up and review it had said wouldn’t affect any final grade. I spent the first half of my third year making up that mistake with extra work and my third year work suffered for it.

I came home. So did she. And I spent some time looking for work. I applied for art-related jobs in our area at first. Screen printing, editing. But never got any responses back, because of how these processes go now and because they were scarce to begin with. I didn’t, and still don’t, believe I had the talent to be freelance in any way. It was disheartening and so I started to, little by little, reduce those aspirations.

She got a job within two months. A retail gig, but in a store she’d have a lot of knowledge on the products for. She could start saving. Meanwhile I was burning through the money I had left from university. By going so far away from home, my living grants were larger, and my third year place bad been significantly cheaper rent wise than my second year one, so I had about £500. After a year and a half that money was basically all gone. Spent on split-payment dates with my girlfriend, birthday presents for family, and stuff I just wanted.

And still I had no luck on job searching, to the point she didn’t believe I was looking. I sent out applications every week to different places. Got a video interview, a civil exam, and a slew of “we’re looking for other people” rejection emails.

I started giving up. I saw myself as a burden to this woman who could go and Do Things with the talent and work ethic she had.

Thats when I messed up.

My biggest regret, after five years together, I decided I needed to break up with her.

For weeks we’d started drifting apart, my own self doubt and inability to communicate properly at the fore. I messaged back less and less, and we’d arrange to meet up less. At first this was because I had no money left I could spend, but thats just an excuse. I loved her and I hurt her.

We broke up after she’d just got off work. I’d said we needed to talk and she’d intuited. She’d already mentioned a break up possibility not too long ago. But that might’ve been my mind making up another excuse. She asked me to bring some of her stuff from my parent’s place and I did.

We were in public, after I met her outside her work and we walked for a bit to a spot nearby. I wonder if passersby were curious what was going on when we sat down on a bench rarely used.

I lied.

I said I’d fallen out of love with her. Used little things from our past as fake reasons. Her lack of trust in me and any intentions toward other girls, because I was a guy from her point of view though that may have been grounded in something else. Her use of recreational drugs in the past multiple times without telling me, because i’d told her I wasn’t a fan of it.

I lied.

I still loved her.

But I couldn’t find work. And she wanted to move out of her parents place as soon as possible, and moving into my parents place wasn’t an option for her, and getting a place of our own wasn’t feasible without savings of any kind. I was an anchor who wanted to break the chain so the ship could go free.

Excuses.

I broke up with her and she got up and left with her things. I stayed for a second before standing up myself to leave. But then she came back, hugged me one last time. It was painfully tight. I didn’t cry, or protest. Because that would’ve given my lies away. I just accepted and reciprocated, and then she was gone.

I don’t doubt she cried on the way home and maybe through the night. Maybe she was mean about me. Maybe she was curious. Maybe she didn’t care at all.

I didn’t cry when we broke up, because I was in the wrong. She messaged me, maybe a few days after, asking if she was still allowed to talk to me. I couldn’t respond. Didn’t know how. Didn’t want to keep hurting her.

I cried later, when she thought I hated her.

Feelings are complicated and painful, and I hope if you read this up to now, yours aren’t too hard to bear. I know it hurts. My heart still aches in the quiet of every night. I hope you can find comfort in the words that you’ll be alright.

And I’m sorry.

[yamagucji]

Embarrassing moments

warnings. just for shits n giggles, 14+ readers preferably, mentions of vomit, poop, choking, etc.

HINATA was extremely constipated and needed to use the bathroom quick. but there’s a long line to the mens bathroom (what’s the occasion anyway??) and he’s standing all the way at the back. poor hinata felt a fart coming so he just couldn’t... hold it in. mans SHARTED. shitted and farted at the same time. it stunk so bad that the guys in front of him said, “damn, you need the toilet more than me,” and let him cut in line.

USHIJIMA and tendou stopped to pet this dog during their walk. tendou’s conversing with the owner while toshi’s petting the dog. dog likes it, it’s all good. until... it got bored and decided that toshi’s butt smelled good. dog just wouldn’t stop sniffing his ass. “please, stop smelling me,” toshi says with desperation, which now catches the others’ attention. the owner has to pry their dog away from toshi’s ass cheeks, please. the awkward tension kinda dies down until tendou utters, “so, what’s your secret? what product are you using?”

YAMAGUCHI drank water in the middle of silent class reading. this boy started choking— and i mean choking on his water. you can hear his muffled coughs in the distance and when you turn around to look at him, his face is all red and his cheeks are puffy. none of his classmates say anything but you can practically feel second-hand embarrassment oozing around. the assistant teacher even has the audacity to say, “drink some water.”

KENMA’s calling this one his last try. he sticks his remaining coins into the slot and tries to get the brand new nintendo box thats in the machine. mf has been going at this for over twenty minutes now. his pouch is empty and there’s a crowd of kids waiting for him. no miracle happens in his last try (shit got stuck!!) so he has to move away only to watch in horror— as the kid after him manages to get it. you’re gonna have to hold kenma down before he hunts that kid with every bit of his soul.

DAICHI had a fat one coming in, that’s for sure. thought it was a free real estate just because everyone else in the camp seemed asleep. so he let that monster fart come out (even partly stuck out his thigh for better airway). whole team was awake in a matter of seconds. nishinoya’s jumped off his sleeping bag and asking everyone if they heard that “loud bang.” tanaka’s over here sniffing around because he knows that no one has got some kind of bomb that stinks.

SAKUSA’s not gonna admit to this one. but one time he opened a bathroom stall (it was unlocked) only to find that it was occupied. there are no words to accurately describe just how horried the sight was. sitting on the toilet was a man taking a shit, with his dick on full boner mode, staring back at sakusa. they only made eye contact for just 2 seconds but sakusa’s seen enough. he’s heard enough too, when said stranger asked him, “you wanna join me?”

ASAHI projectile vomited at the theaters. you should’ve known it was a bad idea to take him out to dinner before going to watch a scary movie. man had no courage to tell you he had an upset stomach nor tell you he’s not a fan of horror. it’s twenty minutes into the movie and he’s poking your arm— but you don’t notice because you’re too engrossed. another twenty minutes, and a jumpscare comes on. man beside you vomits like there’s no tomorrow. ya’ll spend the rest of the movie secretly trying to clean his throw-up.

TENDOU was watching anime in his dorm peacefully. until... the whole shiratorizawa team opened the door just in time for the show to switch up to an inappropriate scene. out of all the times they could’ve walked in, they really had to come when 2d clown man was moaning and fighting a kid? tendou scrambled to close his laptop but now he’s just staring back at his teammates; silent, except for the fact that his show is still playing and you can still hearing moaning in the background.

TSUKISHIMA turned his house upside down and still couldn’t find his glasses, nor his extra pair. he was about to leave bare eyed until his mom caught him and forced him to wear his sports glasses. yeah, the one with the whole strap and everything. mans looked like a fool coming to school with it on. people who didn’t know it was his sports glasses mistook it for swimming goggles. he’s so utterly humiliated now, he can’t even bite back when hinata or kageyama says something.

GOSHIKI... i don’t even know what to tell you. who let this kid go further into the lake by himself? it’s all fun and games for everyone until you hear an ear-defeaning shriek by your one and only goshiki. he’s yelling out, “help me! please! help!!” the lifeguards start kicking in and everyone’s trying to make way. is he drowning? is there something there? no for god’s sake. you find out he just made it 5 ft deep and happened to swim over a bunch of seaweed. never take him swimming again.

ATSUMU decided to check himself out using someone’s car window. he’s fixing his hair, picking at his teeth, and even checking to see if he has any boogers. all of a sudden the window rolls down and there’s a senior citizen staring back at him. “boy do you think my car is your mirror?” the man says in a gruffy voice. atsumu’s knees nearly buckle from how scary this man is and how embarrassed he is of all the four minutes he probably spent with this stranger.

SACHIRO’s job as a vet sometimes makes him do really questionable shit (from an outsider perspective). once he had to ejaculate someone’s dog in front of their owner. uh huh... jack them off, for the sole purpose of examining the dog’s semen. he’s never felt such a wave of regret wash through his body during that whole procedure. it didn’t help when the owner was looking at him mortified, nor the fact that it took such a long time.

OIKAWA does this thing were he shows up unexpectedly behind iwaizumi and slaps his ass. everytime he does it iwa always hits him back (but not the ass). today he learnt his lesson when he mistook a stranger for iwa and slapped the guys ass from the moon and back. when i tell you just how quick all the blood drained from oikawa’s body when the man turned around— you can hear a bag of chips fall at the other end of the aisle and it’s the iwa, who had to witness that whole ass-slap event.

ARAN is gonna knock the shit of the miya twins one day, he swears to god. they sent him a mysterious video during his morning walk, where he stopped at a busy street. it starts off quiet, so he goes to turn the volume up full blast. damn video suddenly started blaring ‘lick my pussy and my-’ please... he’s shaking. passerby’s are looking at him with distaste. aran’s now flushed from embarrassment and running towards the miya house. you can guess what happens next.

BOKUTO walked into the wrong house. spent a whole ten minutes rummaging around the kitchen because his friend said to “make yourself comfortable, i’ll be on my way.” little did this man know that there’s a whole family upstairs waiting for the cops to arrive because they think it’s a robbery. poor bokuto, dragged out of the house by some cops but had no idea what was going on. man was literally just vibing— thinking he was in his friends house.

OSAMU swore this size pants still fit him (hint: it doesn’t). he’s walking through the snack section of the store, lightly limping because damn his dick can’t breath. his truth is tested when he goes to pick something off the lowest shelf and his pants literally go, ‘let er rip.’ fabric tore, and what’s worse is that he was wearing onigiri undies. osamu goes to check if there’s anyone else in the aisle and there is— a group of underclassmen girls from his high school.

KUROO tried to make his chemistry presentation more interesting by putting in jokes. he thought they were funny; kenma even huffed a breath. kuroo’s at his third joke by now and literally no one has laughed. not a single one. except for kuroo himself, who’s awkwardly laughing in a dead-silent room. man was embarrassed. other people are getting second-hand embarrassment by the way they avoided eye contact with him. he vented to kenma later only for kenma to say, “it wasn’t funny. it was just stupid.” poor kuroo.

SUNA accidentally connected his bluetooth to the bus. you know, the one that drives all of inarizaki to their games. wanna guess what the fuck he might’ve been listening to? it’s porn. he’s watching porn in broad daylight. suna doesn’t realize what the issue is until he goes to turn up the volume and notices that the sound is off. he take his airpods off and that’s when he hears pure moaning sounds blaring inside the bus. everyone’s laughing— except for kita and their coach who’s still outside. mf calls himself lucky for that.

[lunar-wandering]

Yes please post about the new OC

yknow what i’ll just talk about him here

aight so his name is Qiū Shí (Autumn Stone) (秋石)

and,

he’s Wukong’s (adopted) older brother. like he saw Wukong leap through the waterfall and was like “alright, that lil new monkey is my brother now”. Wukong was not informed of this until like, 3 years later, when Wukong shyly approached him like, Wukong: i uh......kinda see you like an older brother... Qiu Shi: Qiu Shi: ?????????? this is news to you??????????????

he was trapped in tree roots under the ground for like 200 years, and just. there’s this whole scene of him dramatically breaking free, and pulling himself up to stand, bathed in the light of the sunrise, and then it’s a direct cut to him knocking on Wukong’s door at Flower Fruit Mountain asking what the hell a cell phone is

im not joking about the cell phone thing like- Qiu Shi: hey Wukong can you tell me wha- Wukong: aren't you supposed to be dead Qiu Shi: well im not so can you tell me what a cellphone is Wukong: why are you in my house Qiu Shi: im asking you what a cellphone is

later MK enters like normal and is just faced with Qiu Shi, eating calmly, while Wukong is literally clawing and scratching at him to try and get him to sTOP EATING HIS FOOD- 

and then Qiu Shi notices MK and stands up, and the following conversation is just- Qiu Shi: WUKONG!! you didn't tell me you adopted a kid! Wukong: i didn't! Macaque: yes you did Wukong: you shut up Qiu Shi, kneeling down to be MK's height: it's nice to meet you kid, im your uncle- Wukong: WE'RE NOT RELATED- Macaque: yes you are Wukong: you shut up Qiu Shi: as you can see my little brother here- Wukong: i am OLDER THAN YOU Macaque: no you're not Wukong: YOU SHUT UP Qiu Shi, continuing like all That isn't happening behind him: -hasn't really kept me updated on anything- Wukong: you were supposed to be DEAD Qiu Shi: -so would you mind telling me your name MK: .....what the FUCK is going on

if you’re wondering why Macaque is there, he originally showed up to antagonize Wukong like usual, saw the Family Drama going on and tried to leave, but Wukong wouldn’t let him because he was not Dealing With This Alone

Qiu Shi didn’t actually have a shirt when he showed up on Wukong’s doorstep (clawing your way out of the ground will do that to ya) and so Wukong gives him one of his and Qiu Shi takes it. pauses for a moment. looks thoughtful. Wukong: don’t you FUCKING dare- Qiu Shi: *(runs his claws over the front of the shirt, creating claw marks)* Qiu Shi: there, now it’s more appealing Wukong, head in hands: *(muffled yelling)* Qiu Shi: if you liked this shirt you shouldn’t have given it to me

Wukong does on some level view Qiu Shi as someone more powerful than him (even though thats not true) mainly due to viewing him as an older brother, and, because of this, his subconscious MAKES that true, in that he can’t get the upper hand on him

that is, unless someone reminds him. like he'll be struggling to grab something Qiu Shi is keeping away from him and then someone will just go "aren't you more powerful than him" and IMMEDIATELY Qiu Shi gets knocked to the ground as Wukong kicks his legs out from under him

don’t question how Qiu Shi got these powers because i don’t know but his abilities are all mainly sound based. he’s got a Sonic Scream (think of like Black Canary’s Canary Cry or Danny Phantom’s Ghostly Wail), can do this thing where he can like. become “one with the music of the world” and be completely inaudible (mainly cause i think it’s funny if he can sneak up on Macaque), and he can like. ride soundwaves in a way that makes it seem like he’s teleporting. of course i only made him yesterday so this could change but that’s what we have now

he can’t exactly do his sonic scream right now though. the necklace around his neck prevents him from doing so.

he can’t dance. like, the last time Qiu Shi tried to dance he made a hole in a wall and Wukong had to pay for it.

need to give yall the mental image of Wukong in the process of teaching MK something, and behind him Qiu Shi just. shapeshifts/glamours himself to look like Wukong and starts mimicking him and MK is just trying not to laugh while off to the side Macaque is like "he's stealing my job" 

Qiu Shi: so. Macaque huh. Wukong: i have just decided. im going to kill you. Qiu Shi, calmly pouring himself some more tea: like, how would you kill me?

Wukong probably took Qiu Shi’s name out of the book of death sdlkfslfjsdk

Qiu Shi needs Wukong for something or other, then like, sees him talking to Macaque and just. walks over and picks Wukong up and starts walking away Wukong: hEY Qiu Shi, loudly: sorry lil' bud, but your conversation with your loverboy is gonna have to wait Macaque: hUH????? Wukong: IM GOING TO KILL THE BOTH OF YOU

Qiu Shi’s nickname for Wukong is lil’ bud. yknow. like a. like a flower bud. like a peach tree flower bud.

Qiu Shi has trouble staying still, mainly because of the “trapped underground for 200 years” thing

he has this whole “brother seeking instinct” thing, just. inexplicably can always know where Wukong is.

he’s friends with @wolfcamellias OC Lixue. their friendship dynamic is fucking hysterical

[c-kiddo]

caduceus is autistic evidence post :-)

*not an actual theory post, jus headcanons based on canon scenes + some extra thoughts too just kidding im right

Monotone voice, basically never shouts.. like when he said “i dont mean to raise my voice” after speaking at the exact same level consistently..

Kinda talks in a mumbly way and stutters a lot

The way he very often has a very blank, kinda-smiling expression when people are talking to him.. audio processing face

Doesn’t get a lot of jokes, or when he’s being flirted with. also the jokes he does get (and find very funny) are usually very specific (and about death probably, which weirds out tmn a bit lol) or he has to process them for a moment before understanding, which has happened a lot.. he’s like :-3? .... :-0 oh :-D !

Also, a few times he has laughed at odd/inappropriate times. kinda just at nothing or something no one else was laughing at. which is apparenlty quite common for autistic folks to do, bc of like getting a bit lost in ur own thoughts and think of funny things etc.....

Sorta related (to jokes, and things), but he takes so many things literally. like that time when beau jokingly asked if he’d ever met a ghost that didn’t need punching and he thought about it until he had an answer :’). and also when beau said to fjord (about cad) “like, he was living in the middle of the cemetery” and cad was like "Of course i was, thats where the temple is, the middle of the cemetery". 

He notices EVERYTHING... all these tiny details and noises no one else hears... this happens to me and so i have decided to project this onto cads super high perception. 

In Darktow he had to leave that tavern/bar because it got too loud for him and he got stressed n went and sat outside until fjord came looking for him. (also the “lets keep this.. between the amigos” “which part of the body is the amigos?” thing jksnfkjs)

Also that one time in Rexxentrum that he had a bad perception roll? matt described the city and all the colours and shapes being too overwhelming (to the point of almost vertigo) to think clearly and spot where they needed to go.

He says the same phrases A Lot. (which i have recently found out is called Scripting, and applies to a bunch of things.. mostly used by autistic folks to get through conversations.) “that’s nice”,“thats really nice”, “thats so cool”. “that was a lot” are th most common ones i think. he uses them in some instances that are very high emotion too. like, he’ll almost die and then say “wow... that was. that was a lot.” 

Also repeats back new phrases or words he likes (“worth their salt” and “fracas”) ..the echolalia of it all. 

also a moment in the pirate arc where he uses the word "astute" while talking to beau before admitting that he heard someone else say it and is just copying someone and trying to use it too. luckily he used it correctly (and then him and beau both awkwardly run off to do their own things).

Struggles to express emotions outwardly.. for example: he just repeats “thats nice” etc. about everything he likes and loves. the mushroom cookbook jester gives him for example. also he barely makes eye contact with her in that scene and doesnt rly know what to do or say because mushroom! cookbook! thats so nice :')

and also! he doesn’t rly express when he’s uncomfortable, even when he is Deeply deeply uncomfortable, like in the arboretum. He just quietly said they needed to get out, put his head down and didn’t look at the trees, even though he was visibly super shaken. just had to get out of there. (this was of course partly some kind of trauma response too, but it also read as very nd to me)

Also him having a panic attack on the boat, when his entire world view got thrown off.. i choose to think its bc autistic folks tend to think rly black-and-white, rly absolute, a lot of the time. so in this case its “following the destined path of the wildmother” vs “completely off-track and all a huge mistake and should never have left home and its all gone wrong”

Also i think he finds sudden changes scary. he was super shaken about the nein just stealing a whole boat unplanned...and other things similarly unplanned. idk it just had the vibes of if someone took away your routine and everything familiar... and you’re just like free-floating. its hard to function like that 

Also related to that... doesnt like when there isn’t a plan n gets stressed about it. also often the first person to ask the nein to clarify exactly what they’re all going to do/make a plan. (first thing he asks jester when she comforts him on the boat is "miss jester, do you have a plan?" and she doesn't and never has.. he doesnt really get that vry much

He really struggles to explain things that are upsetting to him. tries to speak but can only get th same few words out. yea ik he is super emotionally repressed but i am also looking autistically. 

He doesn’t really understand if people are insulting him. like king dwendal and also eadwulf both said rude things to him and he just replied as polite as he could even tho he was confused.

Cant help himself, gotta correct people about things he knows more about (special interest energy....). like when beau called his graveyard a cemetery and he corrected and explained the difference :’ )

the way he re-explains how his tea grows when its mentioned too. and that he's a maker of fine graves and the work his family does. its like his wee script every single time . he rly cares abt it

Also just his particular brand of strange just reads very autisticly to me. (even his own family think he’s odd. sidenote: clarabelle is autistic too bc i say so.) the way he says odd little phrases that don't quite make sense and things to plants. the way he says what he thinks, to the point of being rude and blunt and invasive sometimes. the way he doesnt give a shit and just wears what he likes. idk :’) makes me happy.

Oh, and relating to him being blunt. I think that a few scenes when he’s said questionable things or given questionable advice is emblematic of that... he says a literal solution. or a solution that makes sense (to his worldview.. faith the the wildmother) and is technically an option, but he doesn’t quite understand the emotional side of why someone does something, or doesn’t do it.

He’s good at fitting into EMT or wise-old-sage mode and outside of that he’s just, kind of awkward and spacey (and silly). like, when his script or role is taken away he tends to flounder a bit. or a lot, sometimes. and just says stuff and seems just as baffled abt what he said too.

Said bluntness and inability to see when his advice is appropriate or not also means that sometimes he is just rude.. he does'nt mean to be but he sometimes oversteps or is just vry blunt in a way that offends people, and doesn't seem to entirely realise either

Just some headcanons but. i think he special interests tea, cooking, and all things surrounding death/burial... he always has things to say about those topics and i think thats neat.

he's so tired a lot of the time, he says it kind of often . which, disability coded to meee. other things but i think also his brain hurts from everything all the time. adjusting . noise. adjusting.

i just know he loves ritual. in making tea, in cooking, in religion and prayer, in gardening, in communing etc etc etc

And lastly, he pat the moss. because :-) stimmy

[blackstar95]

The Brothers reaction when MC slaps their ass

Lucifer

As usual, Lucifer listened to some classical music and poured himself a glass of wine to relax a bit.

Once he was done, he brought the glass to his lips and took a sip, savoring the taste.

"Mhm," he hummed to the sound of the melody and blissfully closed his eyes, enjoying the quiet moment he was having.

Much to his dismay, you entered his office without making yourself noticable.

Now dont get me wrong, he loves enjoys your company.

But not when your main goal is to tease him.

An thats exactly what you were doing.

You grinned mischievously as you slowly crept up to him, his back turned to you.

Since he was in his own state of mind, he didn't noticed anything.

That was until you reached your hand out.

In that milisecond, Lucifer's senses were tingling and his eyes shot open, turning around as fast as lightning.

But it was too late.

He only watched as your right hand colided with his left buttcheek, giving it a good squeeze afterwards.

Lucifer jumped and just stared at you in shock, processing what just happend.

And you just stood there with an empty expression, your eyes starring at your palm.

"Wow, your butt is actuallly softer than I thought".

Lucifer furrowed his brows in anger and shook his head.

"MC".

"Yeah?" You asked, looking up at him innocently.

Lucifer had that closed eyed smile with an dark aura surrounding him.

"Now, what made you think this was an good idea, MC?".

You shrugged and slowly walked backwards, shivering nervously "I dont know.. I was just curious?"

"Curious?" He met up with your steps and tilted his head to the side, his smile never leaving

He became dangerously close, making you more nervous than you already are.

You felt your back hitting the wall and your eyes widened.

Oh lord...

Lucifer slammed his palm beside your head, caging you.

You flinched and looked to the ground, feeling suddenly so tiny under him.

Lucifer cupped your cheek and made you look back up at him, a sadistic smile on his lips.

"Such inappropriate behavior should be punished, MC"

I leave the rest up to your imagination.

Mammon

Mammon was walking beside you as always, being practically attached to your hip (nothing new).

You guys were at R.A.D on your way to the cafeteria, since it was break time.

The greedy demon beside you rambled about that new scheme to make money, and you once again had to talk him out of it.

"Ya! It aint a dumb idea!" He protested.

"It is Mammon. Just think about Lucifers reaction and the consequences," you shook your head "Want to hang from the ceiling that bad?".

Mammon only scuffed, turning his head to the side.

You glanced over to him and noticed a visible pout on his lips, making him look like a child.

"Hey, Mammon".

"Hm?" He looked over at you "What's up?".

You raised your hand and reached over for his bottom, smiling sweetly at him.

"Cheer up".

He was about to question you, but before he could even start his sentence, you cutted him off with a real loud smack on his ass.

Mammons stopped dead in his tracks and his eyes widened in shock "W-what?".

Once realisation kicked in, his face flushed in an intsant.

"O-oi, human! Whats the big deal slappin' my butt like that?!". He yelled at you, looking like a fricking tomato.

You couldnt help but let out a few chuckles, highly amused by his reaction.

"Ya! It aint funny!"

Thanks to his loud voice, the whole hallway now knew what just had happened.

Leviathan

Leviathan walked down the stairs to the dining room.

He was really excited because he finally got his hands on the new Ruri-chan merchandise that came out.

"Woaah! I cant believe I got that limited edition figurine!, its SO rare and the new outfit- its just soo angelic-"

Levi being caught in his own ramblings didnt noticed that you were walking beside him.

"And that new hairstyle! I cant believe Ruri-chan could get even more cuter than she already is-"

"Say Levi, to who'm are you talking to?"

"WAh!", Levi jumped slightly at the sound of your voice and almost tripped over his own foot.

"Wha- MC!? How long have you been here!?"

You smiled at him and grabbed his shoulder for support, preventing him from falling down the stairs.

"There there, calm down. I didnt heard much".

Levi let out an sigh of relief and turned to you.

"Yeah right, I mean who would want to listen to an yucky otaku like me?".

You facepalmed in your mind and sighed, he really needs more confidence.

Leviathan kept walking and pitying himself, mumbling random stuff.

He has such a negative mindset.

You walked up behind him not thinking much.

But then you stared at his head and then his back,

Eventually your eyes landed on his bottom.

You smirked to yourself as you just ran past him, giving his butt a hard and loud smack.

Levi yelped in surprise and stood still, overwhelmed with what just had happened.

His hand grabbed his right buttcheek and rubbed it, being too shocked to react.

You turned around and waved at him. "Damn Levi, you really got an nice butt there! Im soo jealous!"

You then disapperaed in the dining room.

Levis brain needed a whole minute to process what just had happened.

And then he became a stuttering mess.

"M-M-MC! W-what was that now?!, h-hey wait!" He hid his flushed face behind the back of his hand as he stumbled after you.

Ngl he was kinda happy you touched him.

Satan

Satan was on kitchen duty, cooking his curry.

He invited you to join and help, so you guys could spend some time together.

And theres no way you would ignore that chance.

So here you were beside him, giving him the ingredients he asks for and making some small talk.

"Did you know that Beel almost ate my hair in his sleep?" You sighed "Im lucky im not bald".

Satan glimpsed at you and raised his eyebrow, shaking his head, "His hunger really doesnt know its limits".

He looked up, "Well speaking of sleep, I had an unpleasant dream last night."

You handed him the spoon and nodded "What was it about?"

Satan sighed, "Beel ate too much and grew to be a giant. He then ate the House of Lamentation, leaving the rest of us homeless".

You laughed, "Why do I have a feeling that could actually happen?"

Satan frowned "He already eats plates, its only a matter of time until he starts eating the walls".

You chuckled, intending to jokingly slap his arm.

But since you werent focused on what you were doing, you didnt notice how your slap landed right on his butt.

Satan dropped the spoon he was holding and looked at you with wide eyes.

"What are you doing?"

You turned to him with an confused expression "Did I do something wrong?"

Satan cocked an eyebrow and leaned his head to the side "You just slapped my butt".

Now its your turn to look at him with wide eyes. "I did what now?".

Satan didnt knew if you were joking or not, and it was kinda ticking him off.

"My butt. You slapped it".

"No I only slapped your arm- ohh wait..." you chuckled.

"What is so funny?" He asked you with furrowed brows.

"Sorry Satan, I wasnt focusing on what I was doing and accidently slapped your butt instead of your arm," You shrugged "My bad".

Satan nodded and turned back to what he was doing "Next time be more careful, or I will return the gesture".

You smirked and leaned over to him "I wouldnt mind that".

He will remember that.

Asmodeus

Asmo was having a mid-life crisis.

He was on one of his diets, because his waist gained 1 millicentimeter.

You assured him that a little more weight always looks good and healthy but he wont listen.

So here you were infront of him, eating one of his favorite Cupcakes.

"MC darling, why do you have to torture me like that?"

He whined "Its not faair!"

You just shrugged "I have another cupcake left for you, but since you're on your little 'diet' I will give it to Beel."

He sighed and dropped his head on the table "Does my pain bring you pleasure?".

You frowned "I-"

Asmo gasps and sat back up straight. "Dont tell me your into that stuff?, Wow!"

He smiled and wiggled in his chair.

You sighed and shook you head "Asmodeus, stop".

He pouted "You're no fun..".

After some time you finally finished the cupcake and Asmodeus had reached his limit.

He watched as you stood up and walk towards to the kitchen.

"Wait, what are you doing?" He also stood up and followed you.

"I will bring the cupcake to Beel-"

"No, wait!" he grabbed your wrist and stared at you.

You looked back at him "What is it, Asmodeus?".

He glimpsed to the side "I dont want him to eat my cupcake.."

You clicked your tounge and pulled him towards you, making him stumble to the side

"What are you doi- AH!" He moaned yelped in surprise as you slapped his ass.

"Just eat that damn Cupcake. Its not like you will gain 10kg from it".

He blushed "Oooooh MC! That really made me excited! How harsh you pulled my wrist-"

You just let go of him and left the room.

"MC where are you going?, you cant just leave me here!"

Beelzebub

Beelzebub asked you to keep him company while working out.

And of course you said yes.

So now you sat there, on the bench with a towel in hand, enjoying the view infront of you.

Beelzebubs biceps flexed as he lifted weights, and his white tanktop was drenched in sweat, making it transparent.

His abs showed through the fabric and you blushed.

How can this man be so big and muscular?

You blinked when he stopped his workout and laid the weights back down.

He grabbed his bottle from the floor and drank from it, taking big gulps.

You decided to stand up and walked over to him.

"Hey, Beel"

Beel lowered the bottle from his mouth and smiled at you "Hey, MC!"

You smiled back, and held the towel in your hand out to him, "Here take this".

"Thanks" He nodded at you and grabbed it, wiping the sweat on his face away.

"So, how is the workout going so far?" You asked couriously.

"Im still warming up" he replied.

You blinked, Still at warming up, huh?.. impressive.

"But im starting to feel hungry..." Beel pouted.

You laughed "You can do it Beelzebub, I believe in you".

He blushed and smiled at you "Thanks, MC!"

So cute.

You nodded and patted his shoulder "Sure".

Beel proceeded to start his warm up again, starting with some sit-ups.

But you had other plans.

"Beel wait!" You ran up to him.

He stopped what he was doing and looked over at you "What is it, MC?"

Before he could fully turn his body to you, he felt a stinging sensitation on his butt.

He looked at you startled, now realising you slapped it.

"Wow Beel, your buttcheeks are pretty hard.. are they made of iron or something?" You hold your hand up to your face.

Beel blushed slightly, not knowing what to do or say.

You just shrugged and turned around, marching towards the bench you were sitting on.

But suddenly, you felt a light clap on your own butt.

You gasped, "What-, Beel?!" You looked behind you and saw him standing there, smiling.

"Your butt feels really soft and nice, MC". he chuckled, "Is that a human thing to do?"

"Beel no-"

Belphegor

Belphegor was taking a nap in the attic, skipping the student council meeting.

And since you were coming late to the meeting due to some complications, Lucifer ordered you to search for Belphie and bring him there along with you.

And thats how you ended up infront of the attic, clearly annoyed.

"Belphegor," you spoke as you opened the door "I know you're in here".

The youngest brother laid on the bed, snoring and cuddling into his cow pillow.

You walked over to him and shook him "Hey Belphegor! Wake up!"

He stirred in his sleep and furrowed his brows.

Eventually he opened one eye and glimpsed at you. "What is it?"

"Lucifer wants me to bring you to the council meeting" you explained.

"Too bad, I wont go" he closed his eyes again. "Why dont you join me?"

"No," you shook your head, "Please, stand up".

He groaned "No, I dont want to go".

Thats it

You grabbed Belphegor by his arms, and turned him on his stomach.

His eyes shot open "Dah! W-what, hey-"

You raised your hand and slapped his ass, the sound of it echoing through the room.

Belphegor jumped and sat up straight, looking at you in disbelief.

"What was that for?!" He blushed

"You should stand up," you crossed your arm over your chest "I asked you nicely but you wont listen".

"Alright..," He closed his eyes "I will go"

You nodded "good"

But before you could turn around, Belphegor grabbed your wrist and laid you over his lap, his hand resting on your butt.

You blushed when you realised what he was doing,

You tried to escape, but his grip on you was too tight.

"Heheh," he chuckled "Time for payback".

"B-belphegor-" you were interrupted by his hand squeezing your left cheek slightly, making you shiver.

Belphegor raised his hand and striked an direct slap on your butt.

He expected you to squeak cutely, but instead a loud moan left your lips.

You quickly sat up and covered your mouth, an massive blush on your face.

Belphegor stared at you with wide eyes,

But after a few seconds he smirked.

"Didnt knew you're into that stuff," he teased you "Im not complaining though".

You just hid your face in his shoulder, too embarassed to look up "Dont tell anyone about this..".

Belphegor chuckled and patted your head "I wont, that would ruin the fun".

He will still tease you about it tho, but just when you guys are alone.

[my-simp-land]

You Cheeky Slink

Bucky comes to you in the night to tell you about his latest google dive and maybe something more. Bucky x reader fluff. 1508 words. This is highkey self indulgent so get ready to read the fantasy thats been living in my head lately. Thanks :))

“Doll?”

Bucky stands at my door with just his head stuck into my room.

“Bucky, what are you doing? Where’s your shirt? You’re going to catch a cold wandering around with no clothes on,” I mumble from my pillow and plushie covered bed.

He smirks. He always does that smirk when he’s about to give some smartass response. That stupid lopsided smirk with he petal pink lips surrounded by the beard he’s been growing out. It’s kinda gangly but in a good way.

“Well, I guess I’ll have to come in then, so I don’t catch a cold in this freezing hallway. You know, you don't actually catch colds from being co-”

You had to stop the groan from falling past your lips. “Buck, love you and all, but now isn't the time to drop some of your newly found knowledge on me. It's...what time is it? Bucky, it is past midnight. Please tell me why you’re in my room at 12:38 a.m. talking about colds.”

Peter and I have been teaching Bucky how to use the internet and his phone, and We introduced him to Google a few days ago. Ever since then, he’s been catching himself up on most of what has happened in the last 70s years. It’s really heartwarming to see his interest in aerial technology and space exploration. We’re all glad that Bucky is adjusting well, but he’s been bombarding us all with random knowledge he’s found on the internet.

“Well, in all fairness, you were the one that invited me in, angel. I’m just doing what you said.” The smirk again. It’s too dark now that he's standing in my dark room, but I know the smirk. It bleeds into his voice. It makes him sound more...confident. Or cocky. “But dollface, we’ve explored more of space than we have the ocean. We don’t know what all is living in the deep parts of our ocean, but we know that you’ll get spaghettified if you go into a black hole. Some people think black holes are portals and some think they’re dying stars.”

“Wait, what? Buck, where are you getting your info?”

“Google, of course. Can I sit?”

“Sure.” The heavy weight of a giant man and his absurdly heavy metal arm rests on the corner of my bed. He almost seems hesitant to sit. I can immediately feel his warmth through the blanket. Despite me keeping my area freezing, Bucky always stays warm. “But Bucky, you went to a site to read these things. You used google but from there, what did you do?”

I can hear the wheels turning in his head. “Uh...the interesting looking ones?”

“You can’t believe everything you read on the internet, Buck. Anyone can put whatever they want out there. When you’re doing this research you’ve got to use reliable sources.”

“Reliable sources? Can I lean against the wall and stretch my legs?”

“Sure. Friday will help you with that, but Peter and I, and even Dr. Banner could help explain that to you in more detail tomorrow at a reasonable hour.”

Bucky shuffles his way across my bed to rest against the wall. He’s cautious of my legs as he makes his journey. It’s almost like he goes into assassin mode. Even though I know he’s moving, he tries his best not to disturb me.

“Well, did you know the footstep on the moon will likely stay there for at least 100 million years? There’s no wind on the moon, so it can’t be blown away. And did you know space is completely silent? There’s no air, so the sound waves have nothing to travel through so no sound.”

Bucky carries on with his space talk. Not long after we became friends, he shared that as a child he was interested in planes. He wanted to be a pilot growing up. That quickly became an awkward conversation. Now, Bucky is learning to fly with Sam, but once he learned our travels expanded into space, his dreams were out of this world. Bucky would start his google dives asking about some random thing, but without a doubt, he would end up on space exploration. Peter and I want to see how he’d do in a Wikipedia race. Peter thinks he would be amazing at it, but I know he’d get carried away and go down his own rabbit hole.

“Doll, Neptune has storms big enough to swallow the entire Earth! Can I get under the blankets?”

I hummed my approval and rolled over. Bucky’s voice is deep and raspy, and something about it can lull me to sleep. Usually I can’t sleep with any noise but Bucky is different. He could probably do audiobooks. Steve’s school videos and Bucky’s audiobooks. That’s quite a pair.

Bucky carries on with his space dump until I ask him. “Bucky, Russia got a satellite in space first. Sputnik. Would you have had anything to do about it? Idk. That might be a rough question but…”

He thinks, and he thinks hard. I can imagine his brows would come together, and he would bite at the right side of his lower lip. His Neptune blue eyes would move like he’s reading words off an invisible piece of paper laid before him. He would usually run his fingers through his hair, but Sam mentioned hair loss and that made Buck a little self conscious. I told him not to worry, but I’ll catch him catching himself.

“I’m not sure, angel. I don’t remember anything being about space, but maybe i just didn’t know it was about the space race. That is bizarre though. I was around when we made it to the moon, but I wasn’t. Can I get under the blankets?”

“Yeah, yeah.” Buck starts to talk again as he pulls the blankets over himself. He worms his legs undermine. “Bucky, get your popsicle legs off me. Go put those things on Steve.”

He lets out a small laugh before he continues his ted talk of everything. Bucky has been taken with space, but he’s interested in cooking too. He loves to sit and watch The Great British Bake-Off or MasterChef or Top Chef. It was quite sweet and funny when he tried to recreate one of the meat pies from season two of TGBBO. He was so confident, and his bottom was so soggy.

“We should grow a fruit salad tree. We’ve got to do something to a fruit tree, but we’d be able to make it grow up to 6 fruits! You could have peaches, Steve gets apples, Sam gets...I don’t know, and I get plums. We’d have to think of something for Pete. But imagine it, a huge fruit salad tree orchard behind the compound!”

“If it’s an orchard, why don’t we just plant a whole bunch of different trees?”

“Bragging rights. Can I lean on these pillows? I’m just gonna lean here.”

“Sure Buckbeak.”

“Hmph. Us having a fruit salad tree would be like the animals in Harry Potter.”

“Yeah?”

Bucky carries on, but his closeness and warmth are enough to lull me to sleep.

I woke up not too much later. Bucky has slowly made his way to fully laying between me and my pillow mountain. He’s pulled me in close to him and nuzzles his face into my neck. He somehow got his arms fully around me with my noticing. Our legs are intertwined, and thankfully, Bucky’s feet have warmed up. I can hear his heart beat in this position. Despite the torture and darkness he’s witness, his heart still beats like a young bird’s wings. His body and mind is old, but his heart is young. A young man from the 40s thrust into the 21st century. It is a cruel fate, but I know Bucky is strong enough to carry this burden. A heart is a heavy burden to carry.

I wake with the sun; a curious beam has made its way directly into my eyes. I go to grab a pillow to cover my face, but I seem to be in the death grip of a certain super soldier. I’m able to shimmy my way around to look at him. He looks at peace. Bucky always carries his anxieties and burdens, but in this moment, he looks youthful. He isn’t a super soldier who lost himself for 70 years. He isn’t a man who is widely hated and has to redeem himself. He isn’t a man with blood on his hands. He’s just Bucky; a great guy that will hold you when you cry or share a big bellied laugh with you.

“See something you like, dollface?”

“You slithered your slinky way into my bed.”

“No, no, no. You invited me in, so I wouldn't catch a cold. I just made myself not cold.”

“Oh yeah?”

“Yeah. You were obviously the best solution, cuddle bug. Your heart is so full of love and compassion that it’s gone hot.”

“You’re a big sap.”

“Only for my best girl.”