#THE LORE OF BETH AS THE BAT

[secondstar-acorn]

also “anesthesia’s alive??” is now my favourite pun in this entire podcast

[wileys-russo]

going off the one where less teases reader about her biceps, maybe a fic where reader gets back at lessi by teasing her the next day?? yk, reader showing off her toned quads by rolling up her shorts reallyyyyy high and even moaning whilst in the gym for weights during leg day. j a small idea i thought you'd like😁

mhm mhm im here for this energy

big flexer 2.0 II a.russo

"-so now if i asked you what your favourite taylor swift song is you would say..." viv trailed off hopefully, having spent the last 48 hours filling you in on everything and anything swift lore you made sure to take your time thinking carefully about your answer.

having made the mistake of saying you only knew we are never getting back together when asked the same question for the team tiktok, this had started vivs entire journey to educate you.

"cardigan." you finally answered, viv sighing in relief and patting your shoulder. "this is much better. and why is that your favourite song?" the dutch woman asked as you glanced over her shoulder toward alessia who was deep in conversation with viccy and lotte at another table.

"no reason." you answered with a small smile, your tender gaze not missed by your friends sat around you at breakfast. "disgusting. like a lovesick puppy!" leah mockingly gagged before she shoveled a spoonful of fruit into her mouth.

"pipe down karate kid." you shot back quickly in reference to the black headband she'd chosen to sport today, causing laura to snort in laughter from beside you, leah narrowing her eyes. "you best watch your back today." the blonde warned lightheartedly before she was pulled into conversation with lia.

"does anyone know what we're doing today?" you asked curiously as you finished your plate, pushing it away from you with a satisfied sigh, sneaking a strawberry off laura's plate as she batted your hand away with her fork.

"i know the focus is lower body later in the gym, i heard them talking about it earlier." steph revealed as half the table groaned in annoyance but you pumped your fist up happily, grabbing your plate and standing to your feet.

you grabbed kim and jens empty plates as well, leaving your friends to finish up eating as you made your way inside, handing the dishes back to the chefs with a glowing review.

"good morning gorgeous." arms circled your waist as you smiled at the familiar accent, turning your head to peck your girlfriends lips softly in greeting before the two of you shared a tight hug. "sleep well?" alessia asked with a cocky smile and you smacked her shoulder knowing what she was insinuating.

"just fine thanks." you rolled your eyes as the two of you separated, a ten minute call being given the two of you decided to head to the pitch for your first training session of the day.

"gonna be a hot one today ladies, hope we're all ready to sweat!" beth beamed as she wedged herself inbetween you and your girlfriend, slinging her arms over your shoulders as the three of you fell into conversation.

~

and a couple of hours later you knew beth wasn't lying it was boiling today, and as you all raced around on the grass you were positively melting.

so as most footballers did when running around desperate for some sort of reprive you'd rolled your shorts up in an attempt to try and ease some of the heat waves rocking your body.

the seemingly innocent move not gone unnoticed by your girlfriend who incredibly similar to you yesterday found herself distracted by the longing to admire your toned thighs.

same as she had put an emphasis on working on her upper body strength this season you never missed a leg day, and christ alessia really hadn't taken enough time to appreciate the results.

"russo heads up!" the blonde dragged her eyes away from you just a millisecond too late as a ball smacked her in the back of the head, katie racing over with an apologetic wince.

"sorry, i called heads up!" the irishwoman grabbed the ball back and with another apologetic smile went running off back to her group, lotte ripping into the blonde about the small accident as alessia shoved her away with a playful roll of her eyes, rubbing the back of her head with a wince.

but another person who hadn't missed the small accident was you, having caught the italian clearly checking you out just moments before tragedy struck, and with gears turning in your head you formulated a fool proof way to get back at her for the teasing yesterday.

you rolled your shorts up even further as jonas started to split everyone into teams for a final 11 on 11, tossing you a pink bib as alessia caught a blue one, you sending the taller girl a wink as her eyes flickered down toward your tanned legs out on display.

alessia tugged on the bib and wasted no time clearing the distance between you, the sight of her boots in your eyeline as you knelt down to re-tie your own making you smile. "hi baby!" you greeted with a happy smile, a frown etched into the taller girls face.

"less!" you laughed as she reached forward and unrolled your shorts, pulling them down firmly as you shoved her away. "leave them." the blonde pecked your lips quickly before running off back to her own team, unknowingly only have given you more ammunition to rile her up.

with a shake of your head you made your way to your team, huddling inbetween stina and frida as katie lead the tactics talk and you all cheered as the whistle blew to start. getting into position you caught alessia's eye, rolling up your shorts as high as they could go and winking in her direction.

squatting down a little you watched on victoriously as her blue eyes widened somewhat at the obvious way your quads flexed, missing kick off as the whistle was blown and she hurried off to catch up with the ball.

~

it only got worse for alessia once you finished up lunch and headed for the gym, the blonde having spent the entire break teased relentlessly by lotte and gio for the obvious way she was so distracted by you during training.

you'd managed to escape, ducking off for a meeting with the physio about an old shoulder injury that twinged a little today, assuring your blonde lover that you were okay with a soft kiss and grabbing your lunch to go you'd not been seen since.

so alessia sighed quietly in relief seeing you already waiting in the gym, chatting away to the trainers as everyone was paired off and assigned different sections of the circuit to begin with.

much to both alessia's joy and dismay you and steph were assigned hip flexors as your warm up stretch, and with your shorts once again rolled up alessia's body burned with desire watching you repeatedly thrust and stretch, causing all the different muscles in your lips to tense, flex and ripple.

"oh fuck!" alessia swore as you caught her eye mid stretch and winked, causing the striker to lose her grip on the medicine ball she was squatting with, dropping it on her left foot with a groan of pain.

the italian was hurried off by the medical staff for a quick check up, shooting a murderous glare toward a snickering gio who knew exactly why she'd slipped up, her porcelin cheeks flushed red scarlett with embarrassment.

you watched on with concern as your girlfriend was assessed, gently pushed back into your exercises by an understanding but firm steph that you weren't helping anyone by standing around watching.

alessia was ordered to ice and elevate her foot and dismissed early from the session, limping out of the gym with an assuring glance sent your way that she was okay.

warned firmly but with care by kim that you were still expected to finish your workout you weren't happy but followed your captains instructions, trying your best to distract yourself with flickering from conversation to conversation with your teammates, shoulders heaving in relief when the session was finally called to an end.

you wasted no time in rushing off toward alessia's room, ignoring the trainers shouts after you about recovery options, only stopping when you were outside the strikers door.

having borrowed lotte's key you let yourself in, not wanting your girlfriend to use her foot anymore than entirely neccessary before it could be assessed again by the trainers and physio's tomorrow.

"only me less." you smiled as you stepped into the room, face softening at the pouty frown sent your way by the blonde laying in bed with her arms crossed, foot iced up and resting on a pillow.

"this is your fault!" alessia accused right away. "you and your stupid toned thighs." the striker continued bitterly with a glance at your still rolled up shorts which had only ridden up higher after you'd practically sprinted here.

"that is so not fair! you had no issues teasing me yesterday with your stupidly big biceps." you rolled your eyes playfully before kicking off your trainers and taking a seat beside your girlfriend on her bed.

"i didn't cause you bodily harm!" alessia gestured toward her foot which you gently adjusted noticing the ice pack had slipped off, smiling apologetically as the taller girl hissed quietly in pain.

"neither did i, it's not my fault you haven't realised how long your legs are clumsy." you teased, your girlfriend pinching your thigh for the comment making you grin. "actually so much for those big biceps too, couldn't even hold up a tiny little medicine ball." you pouted mockingly as your girlfriend scoffed.

"you're lucky i'm injured or else i'd be slamming you around like a medicine ball with these big biceps." the girl rolled up her sleeves, flexing her arms teasingly as you yanked them back down with a roll of your eyes.

"god please no, not another gun show."

[mara-the-witch]

"I be the witch of the woods...okay, more like witch of the abbey, but it just doesn't ring as nice."

Oh, hey there! I'm Mara - Lilith devotee, a ghouls' favorite nuisance, and the alleged Abbey Witch...though personally I think Papa Primo held that honor before me. Anywho, if you need help with spells, snacks, and sass then I'm your gal!

Some fun little facts about me:

My 'specialties' are elemental manipulation, and the abjuration and necromantic classes of spell-casting (technically, I'm still newer to the latter, but I guess I'm good enough at it to earn recognition around here)

I'm the younger sister of the ghoul known as 'Alpha', but back when he was human his name was Tristan

When I'm not hanging around with the Pappies or ghouls you can usually find me at the abbey orphanage hosting DnD :)

I'm a Scorpio sun sign

Little Bit of OC Backstory

I designed Mara as an OC to go alongside a Terzo fanfic I'm writing (though the writing is more mental than physical...whoops), so if anything seems a bit bizarre of OOC of how others can view the Papas and such, that would be why.

Mara was diagnosed with ovarian cancer in her early teen years and sent to (basically die in) hospice from her mother. During her stay is when her older brother dies, and is summoned by Papa some years later. Canonically, he's about 10 years her senior

She isn't a natural witch - Her powers were a gift from the goddess Lilith, who is now her main patron deity of worship. She's also the reason why Mara is alive, and a major part of Mara's cancer recovery

During Mara's stay in hospice she befriended another witch named Beth. Beth was a green witch who also mastered in divination, using tarot cards and tea leaves as her main source of insight

She's had run-ins with hunters of the supernatural, as well as associates still connected to the famous underground hunting network known as the Men Of Letters, and she miiiiight have stolen a few magickal and Satanic artifacts from their RI chapter house :)

Some of Mara's spells are actually based on Dungeons and Dragons spells, as that's what her brother and his friends used to play with her when they were younger, such as her 'faerie lights' and 'bloom lights', which is basically the dancing lights cantrip, and wither and bloom, which is an actual spell in DnD 5e; Mara's version has thorned vines that sprout and entrap the enemy or prey, cutting them deep and seeping their blood, tranfusing it into Mara instead. The transfusion provides healing when needed, as well as a boost in vitality and strength, as well as magickal power. It's not a permanent thing, though

About the Mun!

Hello!! My name here is Crow or Ris, or crows-caw-witch (that's my main blog name), and I myself am a real life practicing witch :) Like my character I do honor Lilith, however my matron deities are The Morrigan and Hekate. I work with tarot a lot, and do some minor candle magicks as well.

I'm (clearly) very into music and writing (though I'm not good at it), and I wrote Mara to fit into my Ghostverse, as well as the Supernatural universe (like the TV show). Now, I am still on the newer side of being a Ghost fan, and the lore is something I still struggle a bit with, so please bare with me if things seems odd or 'incorrect'; this is all just fiction RP after all 😁

I do work a full time job, and though I'm not particularly social, especially physically, I do have a fiance who loves to go out and about, and spend time with me when we have the time to spend, so right off the bat I would like to apologize for replies that take some time. I do appreciate every interaction and all feedback I get! Also, I'm awkward AF, and I'd like to say sorry for that too 😅

One last thing: This is an 18+ blog, so please if you are a minor do not interact!! I'm a woman in my 30s and, knowing the fandoms I'm a part of, I'm sure there's going to be adult content, whether in language, violence, or sexual content. And even though I may write smut, I'm still a bit awkward RPing it, so again bare with me if I decline details or flat out refuse it. This ties into the whole "I'm an awkward turtle" thing I mentioned before.

This is an LGBQT+ Safe Space!!!

Intolerance of anyone based on sexual orientation, preference, and/or identity of any kind will NOT be tolerated.

Intolerance of anyone based on gender identity of any kind will NOT be tolerated.

Intolerance of anyone based on ethnicity, race, or culture of any kind will NOT be tolerated.

If I see it, I'll block the perp. Plain and simple. In this house we fucking STAN our alphabet Mafia and worldwide cultures and ethnicities. If you don't like it, let the door hit you on the way out.

[rene-01]

Some information of characters from my new fantasy AU! A list of everyone added so far and what they are! (Some are Minecraft related cause I got this idea in mc!)

-Noah: moth + potion maker

-Cody: saytar

-Gwen: ender dragon

-Trent: Enderman

-Duncan: nether dragon

-Tyler: Viking

-Alejandro: demigod (nether)

-José: demigod (ocean)

-Carlos: demigod (overworld, not including ocean)

-Sierra: demigod + witch (ender)

-Emma: witch

-Eulia (oc): goddess + deer

-Bridgette: siren

-Justin: siren

-Brody: turtle

-Geoff: mermaid

-Crimson & Ennui: bats

-Lindsay: princess + tiefling

-Axel: tiefling

-Ripper, Chase, Zee: Raccoon + thief

-Dawn: fairy

-Beth: fairy

-B: giant

-Bowie: Phoenix

-Raj + Wayne: two headed owl griffen

-Aku (oc): Elf

-Heather: black widow

-Courtney: Centaur

Any questions are welcome! If there’s any specific lore you wanna hear of lmk! I can also make a ship list !! :33

[slashaer]

BETH DUTTON: CAN YOU TURN INTO A BAT?

the question is amusing to him, despite it not being the first time its been asked. the lore and legend of vampires throughout history has gotten quite a few things wrong, but that was more a positive than a negative for him and his kind. it meant that their true characteristics were undetected and well hidden beneath a mountain of misinformation. 'i'm afraid not. though i admit it would be fairly convenient for travel, if i could,' carlisle couldn't quite tell if his secret was safe with beth, but the bat was already out of the bag, so to speak. all he could do was hope she was discreet. 'we aren't opposed to garlic, either. nor crosses or iron. just for your information,' @duhton.

[danandphilchronology]

Sebastian: Universe Defender + Psycho Boyfriend!

Sebastian: Universe Defender

Psycho Boyfriend!

Sebastian: Universe Defender

I’m going to ditch the wayback machine for a while. I might decide to take a peak and let you know what else was going on in the YouTube community, but I’m going to shift my focus to the content! We are starting today with a video uploaded in October of 2008 and based solely on the title and the little bit of the description I can see right off the bat, I am thinking that Phil is blessing me with another short film style video. 

I am interested to see what his content continuous to grow as while he is back at University! From what I know of the Phil Lore, he has graduated with is bachelors already (correct me if I’m wrong) and he is working on his Masters in Video Post Production at University of York. 

Something that I think is very interesting is at how quickly we (as a society of social media consumers) are so quick to discount content creators intelligence and smarts. Dan and Phil are perfect examples of this because of the fun and ditzy content they create. They are some very down to earth creators who are not afraid to connect with their audience, but, at the end of the day, they are some of the most well performing and creative content creators. Between the two of them they have a handful of films, a career on radio, three New York Times #1 best selling books, three world wide tours, and two original games. They were, and arguably still are, a social media empire all on their own, but the internet, and even their most loyal followers, discount their wit and smarts because silly little twink duo make booby joke. 

ANYWAY, we are here to react to a 15 year old AmazingPhil video, not write a novel on how poorly the internet treats it’s creators.

This immediately have me deja vu (which I think was the point considering the drink in the video is literally called deja vu), so I looked back in my notes to see if this was reminding me of something we had already watched OR if I am thinking of one of his more recent videos. I didn’t find anything blaringly obvious, so I am going to make a mental note to keep an eye out for anything like this in the future. The closest think I could find was Jonathan and Mary Beth Argue with the sprite, but… it is not the same thing. Someone needs to really tell Phil not to take things from Stangers, especially those in long trench coats with suspiciously packaged sodas. This video, while short, is actually such a fun and creative idea about timeloops and what could be the pointlessness in attempting to travel back in time to stop something from happening. Honestly, such a fun video. Would watch again. 

Total Watch Time 27m 12s

Psycho Boyfrined!

I am immediately interested based solely on the title because I am disgusting. That is, honestly, the only reason. I love looking back at older videos and overanalyzing moments in order to say things like “omg was that a soft gay?”, and I used to feel back about it until Dan and Phil reacted to all the PINOF videos, and now I feel like I have been allowed. Anyway this video is less than a minute, so I don’t expect to get much out of it, but it has 1.3 million views, so maybe its worth the watch.

… Phil is so clearly attracted to vampires that it is uncomfortable. This video has the same energy as his newest AITA. Like “who cares if he got hit by a car. He is already at the hospital” and “she didn’t die or anything and I get the day off”. Phil really is Mr. Silver Lining. This was actually crazy and I don’t even know what else to say about it…

Total Watch Time 27m 51s

[idv-sunsxin3]

*shyly slides in here from discord* So uhhh.. M-May I request some bethsop headcannons?

Aesop Carl x Beth Anastazja // HCs

(Idv Canon x oc) Beth by @beth-bethar00

Note// I know Aesop's lore, it's dark. But I want to imagine there is this innocent child side of him that is just... fragile, you know 🥺

_____

There are two ways I view bethsop.

One is girlboss x malewife. Because I really can see Beth doing so many cool moves and punches just to take care of soft bf/ih

The other is... technically kinds like this softcore dynamic like the first one, except that they both seem to treat each other equally. Giving and reciprocating Affections through gifts or quality time.

They both have difficulties to express themselves, but they are actually pretty good at reading each other's mood just by behavior---

While Aesop doesn't like to let Beth see the "scary" side of his work, he likes to spend time with her by baking. Trying out different recipes everytime they meet up at the kitchen with the ingredients they agree to bring. I like to think they would do it once in a week or two.

Aesop and PDA is something I've never imagine to go hand in hand--- but I can see that he wouldn't bat an eye when it comes to hand holding or hugs. He loves arm linking with Beth too. Kissing? He'll die/j

He is not used to such kind of physical contact, but he's not scared of Beth, knowing her pretty well she wouldn't hurt him.

He wouldn't be nervous when holding her hand, pulling her close to where his heart is, and plant a light kiss on her forehead. Showing how much her presence means to him.

He doesn't like to see Beth run away from him. Even if Beth assures she won't leave him, even if he doesn't seem worried about it. On the inside, he can't tell himself that it may not happen. Because losing someone so dear to him wasn't pleasant either.

I think Aesop would be so nervous by the thought of sleeping together--- but I have this hc where there are times they both were hanging out at one of their rooms and Beth would fall asleep in the process. Those moments is when Aesop watches her calmly sleep like a beautiful angel as he sits on the bed-- sometimes unconsciously falling asleep too.

They do picnics on the greenhouse after Beth first suggested it when they have plenty of time- convince me otherwise/ih

Like lots of yummy pastries while looking at nature on a soft blanket seems like a cozy idea... Beth usually bakes for them and sometimes Aesop helps out as a way to spend more time with her. I like to think they take turns carrying all the heavy equipment to set them up every picnic date they have.

Embalming isn't that scary as Beth would see when seeing Aesop helping the client's body go on with a morning routine, tidy them up, putting them make up, and talk to them as if they were normal people... as if including them and not viewing them as something he should avoid but be mindful of like a living person.

Beth is aware that Aesop is not very closed with the living- so she would often listen attentively as Aesop talks to her about people who... technically aren't alive at the moment as if they're his friends. It sounds eerie when I explain it but if there is this one person who died naturally and you still want to recall them it would seem heartwarming you know what I mean;;;/ih

Aesop is anxious and probably even an introvert- It's either he stays behind Beth or beside her- but his face will remain as if he saw a ghost when seeing people looking at him and talking to him---

Beth is an exception, her soft spoken voice is soothing. Almost like his mother....

But he doesn't see Beth as his mother despite of her slight motherly nature, no, he sees her as his muse. The love of his life. By the time his goal is finished for his part, she can even tell him to die and he would gladly do that;;😭/hj

Aesop loves embalming Beth during matches, especially when the safe spots are in the right angle.

Bonus points if the place looks pleasing to the eye, just to surprise her in the most pleasant ways as possible to lower this extreme feeling of when she's in danger. He wants her to be cautious for her safety, yet careful to her heart.

He lowkey melts internally when touching fingers with Beth as they decode together- he enjoys watching her get flustered as well, staring and scrutinizing every detail of her facial changes and the perfect flaws she tends to show.

As assist survivors and even as couple, I think they both have medkits for each other in their pockets, basket, and/or suitcase. Both for matches and even in the manor. Like I can see that when they cook together, little accidents may happen with one of them and the other would help them patch up hhh.

I like to think they don't always directly talk to each other about their problems or traumas- like they help each other recover bit by bit by being with them, maybe even reassuring one another and sometimes unintentionally proving that not everything they believe isn't that bad or good. Just go on as humans, yet not ignoring the bad feelings.🫶

[mr-laveau]

What is castle audios? Is it any good? I’ve gotten used to the long storylines in redacted’s stuff, so would it be similar to that? Your designs are super pretty

H E L L O anon!

To answer you off the bat, it's REALLY GOOD. Like, if you enjoy redacted, I honestly think you can take a spin with Castle if you're into F4A audios because she absolutely does work within the same realm of content while adding her own twist to the setup of the world and keeping her characters fresh + unique!

The channel is a lil younger than Redacted hence why it doesn't have longer playlists of videos that his channel does but that doesn't mean it's not going for the long-haul because with the setup of the series thus far, things have moved out of character introductions and more into plot interactions while promising bigger things for the future with the incoming Endax chronicles!

Personally, I don't typically recommend stuff I don't like unless the person is insistent about getting into it and seeing it themselves so trust when I tell you that this is great!

If I had to list some strong suits that the channel has, overall it is that Castle knows her strengths as a writer and plays into that with the way she isn't afraid to connect characters outside of a name drop and set up a whole story that makes everyone feel closer in the small town of Glenwood*, whether that be through joint audios or other characters getting voiced within another audio which adds to the intrigue towards character relationships.

*I also have to say that she boasts more initiative in actually voicing other characters in an one audio and isn't afraid to show how far the river runs in the connections everyone has with each other AND she's very community oriented in the way that she includes other VAs to add to her story while encouraging fans to come up with ideas,theories and just making content in general!

She's also very good at dropping hints and leaving trails so if you're like me, a SH kinnie, then you'll have a blast digging through videos not just in the Glenwood series but stuff like QnAs or CW reacts videos for any lore drops that could piece together the puzzle as you go along!

I also cannot stress how wonderfully she plays into the idea of setting up good characters, creating interesting listeners, intriguing plot hooks and amazing mysteries about what is to come with the next audio. She's got wonderful ideas and great execution and I am always excited when she updates to hear what's new!

If you're looking for somewhere to start and especially if you're basing your picks of Redacted characters, here's my recommendations!

If you like Milo, try Beth

If you like David or Aaron then I do recommend Claire

If you're into peeps like Ivan or Blake, try Rachelle

If Elliot is your cuppa, I'd say to go for Chloe (similar vibes)

If you love Lasko then I can't recommend Rose enough

Guy/Milo/Asher peeps could love Abby, that's for sure

If you wish you had more William, go for Celine

Want something that feels like Darlin/Lovely then I say try Genevieve because it's amazing and Gen is such a doll!

The others I will leave you to explore on your own!

[battyaboutbooksreviews]

🗞️📖 Bookish News - March Edition 📖🗞️

🦇 Extra, extra. Read all about it! 📖 Good evening, bookish bats! A lot happened in the publishing industry last month, but here are a few highlights you may have missed!

Adaptations: 🗞️ Natasha Lyonne and Simon Baker cast for Klara and the Sun 🗞️ There are rumors of John Waters filming an adaptation of his novel Liarmouth (Aubrey Plaza to star) 🗞️ Lionsgate to adapt Stephen King's The Dead Zone 🗞️ Lore - Alexandra Bracken 🗞️ The Parable of the Sower - Octavia E. Butler 🗞️ Exit West - Mohsin Hamid (Riz Ahmed to star) 🗞️ The Broken Earth trilogy - N.K. Jemisin 🗞️ The Night Circus - Erin Morgenstern 🗞️ The Invisible Life of Addie Larue by V. E. Schwab (screenplay revisions) 🗞️ Project Hail Mary - Andy Weir (Ryan Gosling to star) 🗞️ Babel - RF Kuang 🗞️ Netflix dropped a trailer for Ripley 🗞️ There's a trailer for Butterfly in the Sky, the documentary about Reading Rainbow 🗞️ We Are Liars - Mamie Gummer, Caitlin FitzGerald, and Candice King to star 🗞️ Little White Lies - Jennifer Lynn Barnes optioned for a TV series 🗞️ Aristotle and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe is streaming 🗞️ American Psycho is reportedly getting a remake 🗞️ The Sisterhood: The Secret History of Women at the CIA will be a series 🗞️ William Gibson’s Neuromancer is getting a TV series on Apple TV+ 🗞️ Denzel Washington and Jake Gyllenhaal are starring in a Broadway revival of Othello 🗞️ The Adventures of Amina al-Sirafi - Shannon Chakraborty (series and gaming platform) 🗞️ Whalefall - Daniel Kraus 🗞️ Stephen King’s Salem’s Lot will go directly to streaming (Max) 🗞️ Untamed - Sarah Paulson to play author Glennon Doyle 🗞️ Netflix acquired rights to Laura Dave’s The Night We Lost Him 🗞️ Ian Rankin’s Inspector Rebus series to be adapted by BBC 🗞️ A trailer for The WIld Robot is up 🗞️ The Lincoln Highway - Amor Towles 🗞️ The Sky Blues - Robbie Couch 🗞️ I Wish You All The Best debuted last week at South by Southwest 🗞️ A Teen Titans live-action film is in the works 🗞️ The Summer I Turned Pretty has started to filming season 3 🗞️ Jo Nesbo’s Harry Hole series 🗞️ Karin Slaughter is adapting her novel The Good Daughter, starring Jessica Biel 🗞️ Sony Pictures Television is developing Brad Thor’s Scot Harvath series 🗞️ Bill Hader and Quinta Brunson are starring in an animated adaptation of The Cat in the Hat 🗞️ Kerry Washington and Elisabeth Moss are set to star in Apple TV+’s limited series adaptation of Imperfect Women 🗞️ Prime Video is adapting The Davenports by Krystal Marquis 🗞️ The Last Thing He Told Me by Laura Dave is getting a second season at Apple TV+

Cover Reveals: 📖 When Mimi Went Missing - Suja Sukumar (Debut - Nov) 📖 The Life Impossible - Matt Haig (Sept) 📖 Warrior of Legend - Kendare Blake 📖 Sir Callie and the Witch’s War - Esme Symes-Smith 📖 Vilest Things - Chloe Gong 📖 Good Night Thoughts - Max Greenfield (inspired by the late Leslie Jordan) 📖 Compound Fracture - Andrew Joseph White (Sept 3) 📖 Brothers - Alex Van Halen 📖 The Maid and the Crocodile - Jordan Ifueko 📖 Lesser Ruins - Mark Haber 📖 Full Speed to a Crash Landing - Beth Revis 📖 Death at Morning House - Maureen Johnson (August) 📖 Drown Me With Dreams - Gabi Burton (Aug. 20) 📖 The City in Glass - Nghi Vo (Fall) 📖 A Kids Book About Periods - Jessica Biel 📖 Good Lookin' Cookin' - Dolly Parton & Rachel Parton George 📖 Sonny Boy - Al Pacino (Oct) 📖 Pony Confidential - Christina Lynch 📖 Keep It In the Dark - Justin Arnold (Dec 3) 📖 All the Hearts You Eat - Hailey Piper (Oct 15) 📖 Believe: The Untold Story Behind Ted Lasso, The Show That Kicked Its Way into Our Hearts - Jeremy Egner 📖 Viewfinder - Jon M. Chu (director of Crazy Rich Asians and In the Heights) 📖 The Accomplice - Curtis Jackson 📖 The Teller of Small Fortunes - Julie Leong 📖 The Hollow and the Haunted - Camilla Raines 📖 Such Lovely Skin - Tatian Schlote-Bonne 📖 We Are All Ghosts in the Forest - Lorraine Wilson (Nov 7) 📖 A Wolf Steps in Blood - Tamara Jerée (April 16) 📖 The Most Famous Girl in the World - Iman Hariri-Kia (Sept 17) 📖 Phantom Hearts - Rosie Talbot (Sept)

Upcoming Releases 🗞️ We Live Here Now - Sarah Pinborough (Summer 2025) 🗞️ Richard Osman announced a new crime series 🗞️ Questlove's new book on the history of hip-hop (June 11) 🗞️ Life Form - Jenny Slate (Oct) 🗞️ Stephen Colbert's and Evie McGee Colbert's cookbook (Sept) 🗞️ Heir - Sabaa Tahir (Oct) 🗞️ Did Everyone Have an Imaginary Friend (Or Just Me)? - Jay Ellis (July 9) 🗞️ Intermezzo - Sally Rooney (Sept 24) 🗞️ Dinner for Vampires - Bethany Joy Lenz (Oct. 22) 🗞️ The City and Its Uncertain Walls - Haruki Murakami (first novel in six years) 🗞️ Willow the White House Cat - Jill Biden (June)

Other News: 📖 Libby announced its new book awards (Libbys) and winners 📖 2024 Bram Stoker Awards finalists announced 📖 Anything But You grossed $189 million (second-highest Shakespeare adaptation) 📖 There's a surge in AI-written biographies 📖 Tor Books' imprint Bramble is using AI cover art 📖 BookTuber Cindy Pham wrote a book and signed with an agent 📖 ESPN’s Andscape to launch book imprint with Disney this fall 📖 A teenager has opened a YA bookstore in LA 📖 Aunjanue Ellis-Taylor called out The Color Purple remake for its erasure of Black lesbian romance 📖 30% of Netflix's TV shows are based on novels, toys, video games or other existing works 📖 Atria launched a new bilingual imprint 📖 David Goggins is suing Amazon for fake copies of his book Can’t Hurt Me: Master Your Mind and Defy the Odds 📖 Jesmyn Ward signed a three-book deal with Scribner 📖 Haruki Murakami revealed his short story “Kaho” 📖 Dakota Johnson announced her new book club, TeaTime Book Club 📖 Finalists for the 59th Annual Nebula Awards were announced 📖 Publishers filed an appeal brief in the Internet Archive copyright suit 📖 Author Lauren Groff is opening a new bookstore 📖 The American Library Association was awarded the Toni Morrison Achievement Award

[chasetriesagain]

Crosswind Isle

Crosswind Isle is a thriving island dominated by its massive port town. Colorful buildings dominate the western two thirds of the island. The rest is mostly field for grazing with a small orchard near the eastern shoreline.

Point of Interest #1: Lady of the Seas

The Lady of the Seas is a large, comfortable hotel. With 100 rooms to rent, its everchanging denizens come from all over. The Lady was the first fortress built on the island, but it has been an inn for nearly 200 years.

The tavern is legendary for its food and rowdy atmosphere. Maude, the elderly orc innkeeper is nearly as legendary as the establishment.

She’s had the run of the place for 30 years. Rumors abound that she is a retired pirate. Her eldest son is a navy captain.

Point of Interest #2: Shrinehouse

The shrinehouse is not unlike the many other places of worship scattered across the seas. It houses small shrines to a variety of gods and is maintained by a handful of clerics. It is, however, notable for its size and diversity.

Mother Pelian is the longest serving cleric in Crosswind’s shrinehouse. An elf devotee of Artemis, she keeps her past a closely guarded secret. Parties that get into Mother Pelian’s good graces may be asked to retrieve her holy symbol from the forsaken lighthouse.

Point of Interest #3: Good Stuff

Good Stuff is a large house near the docks owned by the Brothers Echo three bat-like sprites named for their tendency to repeat after each other.

Whether the three sprites are siblings or not is uncertain as their story always changes.

The house is crammed full of oddities of varying value that the sprites seem to have organized based on a system known only to them.

They’re mostly useless for arrows, rope, and other standard bits of equipment, but if you need pickled newts of a particular vintage, purple dragon scales, missing pages of a book, or a magic sword, they almost certainly have it.

The Brothers Echo think highly of their wares and price accordingly, but they love music more than money. A good song is usually worth a reasonable discount.

Point of Interest #4: Messrs. Croak & Enders

Among the colorful buildings on Crosswind’s High Street there is a single drab but immaculate black storefront. The sign by the door reads “Messrs. Croak & Enders, Established.”

The interior resembles a funeral home, and the two owners dress as undertakers.

Mister Croak is a squat, pallid man with a wide smile and pitch perfect manners. Mister Enders is a bit taller than the tallest person in the room with a distant expression and few words.

The truth about the strange duo is unknown, but the duo are tolerated because whatever it is they do doesn’t seem to be hurting anyone.

In truth, Croak and Enders do whatever needs doing. Croak and Enders were once the servants of a long-dead god.

They spent millennia seeking purpose and have found it as fixers. They usually expect some price to be paid (usually a favor) in exchange for their work.

They locate rare magic items, find adventuring parties, turn up obscure bits of lore, and very rarely slay dragons.

Point of Interest #5: Elixirs & Brews

This simply named potion shop is run by the middle-aged Madam Delancey who has recently taken in her brothers family after their home on another island was ruined in a storm.

The potion making talent runs in the Delancey family, and (though now especially crowded) the shop has never been better stocked or more profitable.

Point of Interest #6: Crosswind Library

The Crosswind Library is a treasure trove of rare books and nautical charts. It is currently overseen by the elderly dwarf Harrier Seastone and his two young human assistants Willem and Beth who are hopelessly in love.

Point of Interest #7: Valiant Shipwright

Lucas Valiant is a young human man following in his father’s footsteps as a shipwright. The Valiant crew is famed for their versatility after years of working on the strange ships that visit Crosswind Isle.

Point of Interest #8: The Seafort

Newer construction than the Lady of the Seas, the huge walls of the Seafort sit closer to the waves and protect the island with powerful cannons.

The lizardfolk admiral Hazikar has few friends thanks to his aloof manner and unsentimental approach to protecting the city, but Crosswind’s leaders trust him.

Point of Interest #9: Crosswind Lighthouse

The amateur elf mage Menlo lives in the lighthouse along with his seven half-elven daughters. Menlo settled on the island when he fell in love with the lighthouse keeper.

[ihassheepquake]

DC's Batwoman 3.10 "Toxic" has aired on the CW and I'm here to talk about it

Talking about Batwoman is truly one of my favourite parts of the week. And this is truly the best season of the show so far, which makes it all the better.

Starting off strong with Pam teaching Mary have to be one of the poison sisters. Mary is immediately torturing a guy (who lowkey deserves it, I'm with her) which we love. Pam is feeding off of Mary like some kind of energy vampire, also love that. And finally Alice comes to team up with the Bats!

I like that Alice seems offended at the implication that she has a plan.

Ooooh, Pam has a baby brother?? Her mum got her into plants because they couldn't afford treatment for said brother's asthma? And they were poisoned which killed said brother? Love this lore.

Ryan has officially learned the best trick, the creepy just appearing in the back of somebody's car trick! Now she just has to master the vanishing whenever somebody looks away regardless of for how long thing and she's officially a Bat! Alice I'm not surprised can already do it.

Mary discovering that Pam's plan absolutely involves a lot of murder and seems like she might be having second thoughts. She's definitely freaked.

"The owners of this place will find it great for business" Renee says, to the owners of the bar. Isn't that a fact Renee should know considering she's been blackmailing Ryan this whole time with the whole Batwoman thing? Like, why did she not look into Ryan enough to figure out she (technically) owns a bar?? It might not be the most useful information but it sounds like something you should know bestie.

I fucking hate Jada Jet.

Glad that Mary still has morals. Maybe Poison Mary isn't the worst thing. But Pam is definitely going to kill her by this energy vampire shit one of these days.

Alice and Ryan listening to Sophie and Renee talk about the night they fucked? Fucking top tier. And Alice having come to actually care about Mary is pretty cute.

After this really dramatic conversation with the Bat Team, I really think that Poison Mary might be one of the best Arrowverse antagonists. She's at least one of the most relatable for me, which is a good sign of a well-written antagonist. None of the other major antagonists except maybe Oliver's half-sister whose name I don't remember and Cindy & her new ISA in Stargirl really did that for me. Though I'll admit that I haven't watched the last two or three seasons of Legends and don't remember like half of Arrow so there may be some I don't remember or haven't met.

Not to say that Mary is becoming a hero by helping the Bats stop Ivy, but it does put her in an interesting role. If all of the "Poison" in Poison Mary isn't removed by the end of the season then she's gonna be in a really fun place for future seasons.

The return of Batwing!! Luke taking the first steps to recovery, I'm so proud of him!

No more Poison in the Mary! She's free!! I really, really hope that going forward in this show, they don't forget the lessons they learned about Mary and the team dynamic in the future. And I also hope that somehow what's happened with Mary is going to put Alice on the path to recovery. She doesn't have to ever be Beth Kane again, she can be Alice. But she can still take steps to be better. She can still work through her trauma and be Alice, a version of Alice, if that's what she really wants.

It looks like this is the end of Ivy's story. At least for now. Which I kind of love because it is a pretty good end for her, but that also makes shitty Joker 2.0 wannabe the main antagonist and I don't even like normal Joker. I'd much rather Ivy be the real Big Bad.

Sophie and Ryan are gay and in love.

You see this is why I fucking hate Jada Jet so much. Fuck her.

That's it! That's the episode. We have three episodes left and it looks like we're barreling to quite the explosive ending. Whatever that ending is, I hope it gets rid of Jada Jet. But we'll find out next week with DC's Batwoman 3.11 "Broken Toys"

[rebcrn]

𝐈𝐍𝐓𝐑𝐎𝐃𝐔𝐂𝐈𝐍𝐆. . . 𝐁𝐄𝐕 "𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐍𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓𝐌𝐀𝐑𝐄" 𝐖𝐈𝐋𝐃𝐅𝐈𝐑𝐄!

[OLIVIA HOLT, CISWOMAN, SHE/HER] who’s that? oh it’s ELIZABETH “BEV” WILDFIRE. i hear they’re 22 and are known as THE NIGHTMARE around SKULL ROCK. they’re known to be AMBITIOUS, CONFIDENT and VINDICTIVE, MATERIALISTIC some people say they remind them of RIDING IN CARS WITH BOYS, COVERING TRACKS OF HEELS IN THE DIRT, RELIGIOUSLY APPLYING LIPGLOSS, “IM GONNA BE A BIG BIG FUCKING STAR”, AND SECOND CHANCES. they DO believe they died. [ro]

𝐁𝐀𝐒𝐈𝐂𝐒

full name: elizabeth jane wildfire nicknames: bev, local lore has it you die if you call her beth! birthday: august 1 age: twenty-two sun/moon/rising: leo/virgo/virgo sexuality: pansexual but she definitely is like ! im straight! education: high school

𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐀𝐂𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐏𝐋𝐀𝐘𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓

aka, a handful of bev’s favorite songs & others that capture her general vibe (some era accurate, some not!)

pretty in pink - the psychedelic furs

the power of love - huey lewis & the news

cherry pie - warrant

i touch myself - divinyls

bad medicine- bon jovi

addicted to love - robert palmer

white wedding - billy idol

whip it - devo

centerfold - the j. geils band

𝐀𝐄𝐒𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐓𝐈𝐂𝐒

riding in cars with boys, covering tracks of heels in the dirt, religiously applying lipgloss, “i’m gonna be a big big fucking star”, second chances, pinks and reds, the smell of hairspray, perfectly manicured nails, names in shining lights, vintage hollywood stars, cherries, shattered glass, obnoxiously chewing gum, being the loudest person in the room, floral scents, a closet organized by color, being the best of the best, and having a heart made of stone!

𝐁𝐈𝐎

tw: death, light gore, car accidents

some people are simply born rotten. in place of a heart is a bad seed. elizabeth wildfire was one of those children. there was a darkness in her eyes from birth that fully scared her parents and she wielded that knowledge like a sword. she was the second of three kids, and truly, it was a miracle that the wildfires had another after bev. from the get go, she was determined to prove all of those stereotypes about the middle children wrong. bev was the star of the show at all times, the most important person in the room, and thank god, the only girl of the three wildfire children.

now, there wasn’t anything wrong with the wildfire family. they weren’t prim and proper like the cunningham, richards, or wheeler families, but they hadn’t fallen on as hard of times like the mayfields or munsons either. still, to bev, they weren’t good enough for her. after thanksgiving in 1972 when bev, then beth, screamed at the top of her lungs at her mom for doing her hair incorrectly, she learned that her parents feared her. from that moment on, she used it to her advantage. it started small, like batting her eyelashes at her dad to buy her a candy from the gas station, then berating him when he wouldn’t, or begging her mom for a brand new package of barrettes and causing a scene in the middle of the store when she said no. from a young age, bev whipped them into shape so they knew that what bev wanted, bev got.

the older she grew, the more extreme her requests became. the big standoff had been in middle school when she shrieked at her parents until they made her older brother move out of the bedroom in the basement so she could have it. once she did that? bev knew she was unstoppable. this attitude carried on to her peers and teachers, which didn’t make her the most likeable girl in class which infuriated bev.

for as long as she could remember, she knew she was destined for more than small town life. perhaps a career on the silver screen, looking so glamorous in magazines that lined every shelf. she’d be a household name and the sad, pathetic people of hawkins indiana would try to grasp at an ounce of her shine by saying they knew her way back when. bev was obsessive over having the best hair, the best makeup, the best clothes, choosing the right people to hang around, the right activities to do and the most desirable way to act. she didn’t care who she had to trample or what sense of morality she had to give up to achieve those things. in the end, it was all for the greater good, all in the name of stardom, and all in the name of her allure.

it started with joining the soccer team in middle school, which had been both a blessing and a mistake. she was good at it, sure, but bev didn’t feel very good when some freakazoid slid into her and her bone popped out of her leg. she fainted at the sight and woke up in the back of an ambulance totally doped up thirty minutes later. at that point, she was going by beth. grating, annoying, demanding little beth. well, having a full leg cast in middle school changed things for her entirely.

like she realized she had her parents wrapped around her finger, she used the sympathy she got for the gruesome injury to propel her popularity. she changed her name from beth to bev, because it was far more glamorous. she milked the injury, begged boys to carry her books to class and pitted girls against each other to clamor to be the ones to help her into her crutches while she healed. power paved the road to greatness, and bev was already great, she just needed the rest of the world to realize that.

by high school, bev had solidified who she was in the small scale food chains of hawkins. she hid all she could about her family in a small town like theirs, they were deeply embarrassing. she continued immersing herself into looks, popularity, and dating. all of the little things that mattered to bev seemed to work. they got her to joining the ranks with the other top dogs of hawkins high, and they kept her there, until tragedy struck. it was the summer of 1984, right after bev had graduated when that idiot fred benson caused the crash that killed her. she had been set to get out of hawkins come fall, like she was always hoping to, and bev had been planning for this to be the summer of her dreams! but life moved on, she never got to enjoy starcourt mall or go to a college party as a college student. it all just ended.

then, she woke up. they told her she had been in a forest commune all these years, but she knew that was a fucking scam. she remembered. she remembered the headlights coming towards her, the pain, the slipping away. her final moments were etched into her brain like the letters on her tombstone that were meant to sit in a star on the hollywood walk of fame. it didn’t matter what these government goons were trying to tell her though, what mattered that she was back and she was grateful for however it happened.

while the supernatural may have seemed inconceivable in life, now that she had her sacred second chance, bev wasn’t planning on wasting it. with more vengeance in her heart, she’s prepared to show just how thankful she is to whatever brought her back. whatever it takes, her end will justify her means.

[vake-hunter]

Heart’s Desire Lore Post

[All of my Ambition lore can be found in this google doc]

The Marvelous

This is protocol: when a player wins, they depart. A new candidate is found, or occasionally, like your delecterious self, presents themselves." Pages lets out a long faux-melancholy sigh. "The rest of us must keep playing, of course. Victory is the only escape."

“When a winner expresses their heart's desire, we – that is the Masters – gather, and turn all our ingenuities and resourcements to its fulfilment. If it is possible, we shall grant it. We have never failed yet. After all, we have moved cities in pursuit of desire. I fear to be immodest, but our capabilities are significant."

The Deck is, at first, very normal. Until, as Pages says, “the unfortunate business of expense, deadly journeys, etcetera, can begin."

"They must be consecrated, naturalously, in the Kingdom of the Is-Not.”

Discuss the venue. Where is the best place to hold the Honour? “"The venue must be somewhere that all the players can agree on.” The answer to everyone's needs is Arbor.

The standard set of Cats, Rats, Bats and Hats. Then there are the trumps: the trinity of face cards which tops each suit: the Jacks, smiling and stern, the Queens, sober and wild, the Kings, magisterial and melancholy. Each face is unique to its suit, a Tiger for a Jack of Cats, a Master for a King of Bats.

First played in the Third City

The cards are a recent convention. It changes with the fashion of the cities.

Seven players, always. Every five or ten years – the date depends on certain astrological conjunctions, written in the roof. 

Rules

Each hand you pay an initial ante (7 coins) and are dealt a hand of cards. You then chose to call (pay the current bet), raise (double the current bet) or fold (lose your current stake, and the hand, but bet no more coins).

Each game is played in a series of hands, during which you stake some of your First City Coins. Hands are compared, with different combinations of cards have different values. At the end of each hand, the winner takes the loser's stake. When one player's coins are gone, they lose the game. In its essence, it is not dissimilar to poker – a fact which the Custodian claims is no coincidence.

Gradually, you learn about the legal combinations of cards. How First Fall beats Second, but both are trumped by the Perfidy of Sisters. About the complex interactions between the Parliament of Rats, the Tragedy Procedure, and the Four Crowns.

On the faintest and most coyly-worded of tablets, you study the forbidden hand: the Thing in the Well, which is mentioned nowhere else, and which loses to all other hands but one.

Then you move on to the esoteric rules that govern as yet undiscovered combinations. The Conspiracies: the matching of key cards to increase their value – or decrease the value of an opponent's hand. You learn to avoid the Treachery of Seven, which renders aces lower than sevens. You struggle to understand the Footsteps of Salt, a rule which has never been interpreted the same way twice.

The Thing in the Well wins only against All Manner of Things.

 If you run out of coins, you can stake something else. If your opponent accepts, you may play one more hand. All or nothing. They call it the Chance.

rules forbid excessive drunkenness unless the Debauchery of Fourth is in play

Mr Pages

Pages fucking HATES the monkey. 

Literally moves into your house, drinks all your wine and calls you a bitch.

Really likes Roquefort Cheese. This is important Lore.

Inquire after Mr Pages' own heart's desire: Normally, it would be unwilling to divulge information of a personal nature. But under the influence of uncanny musics, the Masters sometimes let something slip. 

Mr Pages, in your drawing room, waltzes clumsily to the aerological sympthony. You watch, carefully, as it performs some soaring dance of heavens long since abandoned. Beneath its robes, shapes stir and bulge, as if trying to break through the cloth. Are those wings?

"Home," it says, it's voice slurred, "I want to see the stars again."

Mr Pages' approach is brutally successful, and First City coins teeter in stacks at its elbow. It raises aggressively, pushing rivals into situations where they stake more than they should. Then it folds, leaving others locked in bidding wars they daren't lose. Then, when it has a strong hand, Pages pursues it relentlessly, driving up the pot and turning routs into slaughters. Its victories are infrequent, but Pages only cares about comparative success. All it cares about is staying one coin ahead.

Beats the Monkey but offers him a Chance if he has something to bet. The Monkey bets you. Pages instantly accepts. And loses to the monkey. 

Now hang on a minute— you protest, but Pages raises a talon. "Quiet please! It is inapproprisiderate for the stake to speak. The Chance has been offered and accepted. One more round; all or nothing."

Cards are drawn, discarded, drawn again. The Monkey does not stand on ceremony now; there is no showmanship. It calmly puts down a straightforward Ascension of Cats: the three, four, five, six, seven, eight and nine. Pages stares. It contorts beneath its robes. "I offer a Chance of my own!" it screeches, in panic. The Monkey shakes its head, but Pages persists. "Name a price! A flask of Hesperidean Cider! A vial of my own blood! The very robe from my back!"

The Monkey hesitates. It is obviously tempted. To disrobe a Master, to expose its true nature here, before Londoners... But no. The Monkey keeps its eyes on the prize. It picks its nose, dismissively. Thwarted, Pages emits a strangled noise, and jerks spasmodically to its feet. "Impuderagous!" it squeaks, and hurls its cards across the room before sweeping from the Helmsman.

Publishes a bunch of poems about how much monkeys suck.

Confirmed crime is Truth-Strangling.

The Manager

Ask about the Manager's heart's desire: The Manager offers a hungry phantom of a smile. "Cities are odd beasts, don't you find? One can never tell where one begins."

"My needs are simplicity itself. I want a bright diamond. I will make it my heart and grow from there into something strange and wild. Like my beloved. I will carry the seed of a new city. Perhaps I could be of sandstone and gold. That would look very splendid, don't you think?"

The Manager's style is infuriatingly languid. He considers his hand minutely before every bid. When he raises, he counts his coins with plodding deliberation before committing them. And then, half the time, he reveals he has nothing better than a Remorse of Sisters or a Roser's Retreat! Except, apparently, when someone thinks they have him figured out and calls his bluff, only to walk right into a Peace of Hell or an Black Glass Mirror. The Manager likes to keep his opponents guessing.

Uses Nightmares against his opponents.

You can choose to win one of his Brass Buttons or the Topsy King’s Mind when you beat him. 

A Bright Brass Button: You won it from the Manager of Royal Beth during a game of the Marvellous. It is a key to a secret back door allowing you to leave his hotel. And it is very, very shiny. [Weapon; Watchful +3, Bizarre +2, Glasswork +1]

Your Monkey

The Monkey appears to be asleep, but you are certain it is a ruse. You think it's trying to put the other players off their game. It snores loudly when Virginia is deciding whether to raise. It chatters its teeth as the Bishop rearranges his cards, upsetting his train of thought. And whenever Mr Pages lays down a card, the Monkey noisily breaks wind.

 The Monkey is guilty against Hell and the Chain (only ascension is permitted)

The Monkey used to be Gregory Beechwood, and previously won the Marvelous. His desire had been to become an ape because he believed aps were better than humans. He now regrets it. A lot.

His current Heart’s Desire is to end the Marvelous forever.

Beechwood's argument was that man once existed in a state of grace: its present form a devolution. That pristine state was to be found in the form of the ape. One of the players of the Marvellous just so happens to be a monkey – your Monkey, to be precise.

The Monkey gives you a wink, then darts a glance at Pages' now useless mountain of remaining coins. Was that the play? To tempt Pages into giving up his stake advantage? To even the odds by risking everything on a single hand? With you as the prize? Well, it could have bl__dy asked!

Wins against Pages, but not before hesitating when Pages offers its own robes for a Chance of its own. 

Your final opponent is your own monkey.

Virginia

She is very, very mad at you.

Ask about Virginia's own heart's desire: An old desire, renewed. Virginia gives you the thinnest smile you have ever seen. "Sanctuary," she says, in a voice as soft as bare feet on snow. She looks away, indicating the end of the discussion.

Virginia sets a strategy early and holds to it come hell or high water. She trusts to the deck, discarding reliable cards in the hope of a high-scoring combination. But the cards aren't her friend tonight. The best she can manage is a Brace of Hats, then a String of Rats. But every now and again, it pays off. When it looks like she's within inches of constructing a Great Chain, Mr Pages folds hurriedly. A few rounds later a six-card Mirrorcatch wins back her losses. If her fortunes change, her approach might bear fruit.

Loses to your Monkey. 

Kills you so you can meet the Boatman. Is like really excited to do it. "I've been waiting for this...." Virginia arrives at your lodgings promptly. She passes a cursory glance over the instruments of death you've neatly laid out for her (to furnish your own demise.) "Thank you, my dear," she says, "But I shan't be needing those." She advances on you, wearing her sharpest smile. Mercifully, you do not remember the rest.

The Bishop

Ask about the Bishop's own heart's desire: The Bishop smiles, though he is no longer looking at you, instead off into some middle distance. "South," he says at last, his voice low as though thickened with honeyed wine. "To be forgiven. To be welcomed. To end all these darkened days of wandering. To taste sweet fruit upon my tongue and walk in pastures gold. I would lie down upon that splendid glade like cloth of emerald and feel my cares mist away, like dew on a cold morning. And I would not walk there alone. I would open the gates, and lay a path so that others could follow, those who knew the signs." Thin tears streak his face.

The Bishop's style is cautious. He prefers reliable hands, and rarely raises. He watches his pile of coins hawkishly, as though they might abandon the table of their own volition. Still, after a few rounds you think you have discerned a pattern: every three or four rounds he finds his courage, and plays to the end regardless of his hand.

Loses to you or the Manager depending on how you faired in the Honor.

Topsy King

Doesn’t seem to remember why he plays. Staked his mind against the Manager to stay in the game and lost. The Manager now keeps his mind.

He favours esoteric combinations and rare exceptions. He invokes the Treachery of Sevens, the Heart-Catcher's Promise, and the Embarrassment of Swans. He constructs elaborate Conspiracies from low-numbered cards, and disposes of kings and queens like a guillotine. He is having a good night, winning a steady trickle of coins from the other players. But his weak point is the Manager, who always seems to know what the Topsy King is holding.

Loses to you or the Manager depending on how you faired in the Honor.

You have won back the Topsy King's mind. You should return it to him. Even if it is sometimes a lizard.

You restored it to him. He will never be as he was, but nor is he entirely what he became. Some of the time he is the Topsy King; sometimes he is Tristram

The Thief-Oath of Tristram Bagley: You restored some of his lost mind, and the Topsy King will forever be in your debt. He will always owe you a favour, and you will always have a friend in a high place. [Affiliation; Shadowy +1, Dreaded +1, Bizarre +1, Mithridacy +1, Visiting Tristram Bagley +1]

October

Previous Winner.

The Calendar Council is composed of twelve members: each opposes the purview of one of the Masters.

"October achieved her goal and vacated the Council. But she remains one of twelve – a successor has not been chosen. She must mean to, however, so we must assume she is somewhere that the Masters cannot reach but the Council can. Which suggests – ah. Yesterday's Clerestory."

"I asked for my dreams to come true, and the Masters arranged certain accommodations with the powers of the Is-Not."

"The Masters didn't know who I really was, of course. I spent years constructing a false identity in order to join the Marvellous. Virginia saw through it, but did not expose me. Not that I'd have let her." October smiles bright as a falling star. "Afterwards, I used my reward to cast one of the Masters in a prison of its own failures." October sighs wistfully, "I understand that most of them have had second thoughts about the game since then."

Won and killed Mirrors. 

The Boatman

A previous Winner

At last, he answers in his creaking voice. "A replacement. I grow weary." His voice echoes in the hollowness of his skull. "My desire was granted, but difficult to arrange. An appropriate substitute did not exist; therefore one had to be born." The Boatman punts the craft further into the centre of the river.

"They should be of age now. And yet." The Boatman's gaze is briefly reflected in the water, dark empty sockets lost in the darkness. "Perhaps there has been a complication." His voice cracks, a splinter of melancholic menace.

His Amused Lordship

A previous Winner.

His Lordship tells you of his heart's desire. "Damn fool game. I only played to rescue a damn fool friend. Well, friend undersells it rather a lot. She wouldn't be pleased to hear me describe her so. They have such terrible foul language on Mutton Island." His Lordship smiles wistfully. "She was on a dark path, a seeker of that which shouldn't be sought. I played the game to win her back."

Won and freed Mrs Plenty from Seeking.

Mr Hearts

Created the Marvelous in the Third City because the Masters were bored. Lord of Blood in the Third City

Is fat!!! Bulky!! Big!!

Flies you to the top of the tower!!

Has red eyes. 

Final Match

Takes place deep in the Bazaar. Literally in the Bazaar’s heart. 

The Masters all gather and hang from the ceiling to watch. 

Visions of different outcomes assault both of you with the beat of the heart.

Visions of Power: You feel the slow stretching in your bones. Your organs, persistently rearranging themselves into superior configurations. You cast off your robes to stretch your new arched wings, wide enough to break the sky.

The Bazaar opens all of its seven doors to you: the other Masters welcome you to a spire of your own. In the innermost chambers, you let fall your robe and allow your magnificent wings to spread—

Visions of Love: Adoring eyes locked with yours. The heat of a fierce embrace, beating heart to beating heart. Two lives, completed by each other. A love that inspires and consumes.

You play with a poet's ardour and mastery of form. The cards want you to win; they adore you. A rare Adoration of Days; a timely Anchorite of Norwich. Your opponent, meanwhile, is struck by these visions more powerfully than those of yesterday. Tears glisten on his hairy cheeks. His paws shake. He still plays a string of lucky, desperate hands, but you're able to win back some of your coins before the day is through.

Visions of Time: You see yourself defying time (the greatest of thieves), and living hale and healthy into a new age of the world. An endless future, to make of which what you want. And not just time for you, but for others, too. The theft of the sixth city deferred. London's lifespan is prolonged, gleaming like the Neath's darkest jewel.

The heart shows you a New Empire, its dawn-ships conquering territories across the zee. It shows you the Sixth City – a colony of the Fifth – suspended in chains from the Neath's ceiling. You see yourself, centuries hence, on a throne of roses in the Eighth City after the Treachery of Arbor; and then you leading the leagues of Hell against the Ninth— In each vision, you dedicate a handful of years to planning your next move in the Marvellous.

Visions of Escape:  Escape from London, escape from the Neath. You see the glow of a rising sun across the length of a horizon; feel the playful touch of wind in your hair; smell the scent of fresh-fallen snow, sharp and crisp; hear the relentless chatter of birds, clear in a blue sky.

You lose, but invoke your Chance, staking something. Either your profession, your destiny or a single penny. (if you don't have a penny you can borrow one from Hearts.) 

You win, then. But Beechwood, your monkey, wishes to stake his own Chance.

Accept his Chance: He stakes all that is left of himself. The remainder of his humanity. And then places a losing hand on purpose. He turns feral and runs off, unable to deal with being trapped in the game as a monkey any longer. 

Decline his Chance: Beechwood has drawn away. You can see him wringing his paws together, compulsively. His eyes are haunted. He knows that – in a few years' time, when the false-stars align – he must play the Marvellous again.

Your Desire

Mr Hearts speech: "Colleagues, we are gathered (save for Mr Pages, who is excluded for reasons of a conflict of interest) to fulfil our sacred duty. This creature–" here, it gestures at you, "–has proven victorious in the Marvellous and earned their heart's desire!"

There is polite, scattered applause.

You take the time to look around. The walls are adorned with calendars – some of them follow earthly dating systems, others do not – and maps. The workbenches are covered with indecipherable apparatus. A set of heavy red books stands on a shelf. You can make out the black-lettered title of the nearest: 'The Tragedy Procedures Vol. VII.'

"Here," Mr Hearts tells you, "is where we perform our greatest works. This is where we ascertained how to purchase London, and how to accomplish the small request Her Majesty required in exchange. Thus far, no request has been beyond us. Now, if you would do us the honour, tell us your heart's desire. We shall do all in our power to grant it."

Power: You want to be one of them, a Master of the Bazaar – terrible, glorious, magnificent.

Another argument follows, this one not about whether but about how. There is some debate as to your bailiwick and whether this can be a purely titular bestowal. It cannot. Spices and Hearts begin to mix steaming concoctions at one of the workbenches. Mr Veils measures you for a robe.

In the end, Hearts approaches you. "It is decided. You will be Mr Cards." 

Love: There is a long silence. "The problem, oh perspicacious, indeed brilliant, victor of our game," Spices says in its sibilant whisper, "is that despite our very best efforts – and I do not wish to disparage our dear Mr Fires in saying this – we cannot manufacture love." Fires only grunts.

"Does it have to be true love?" Wines interjects, thoughtfully. "There are approximations that, as far as we can tell, are indistinguishable in all meaningful ways—"

"We are not all convinced," Hearts cuts in, "That true love even exists. Certainly, we have yet to isolate it. But! Happily, we can offer something better: adoration. Celebration! The whole city, united in recognition of your evident magnificence. Fame, and of course, glory."

Choose something else. Choose something that is not love.

The Masters have no idea what love really is.

Adoration: To be known by all. To be admired. To be worshipped! In every mind of the city will live a shining image of you, perfect, pristine, and permanent. A collective sigh of relief from the Masters. Adulation, adoration, envy – all these can be readily manufactured.

Time: Long life – not just for you, but London, too. Eventually, the Masters will require a Sixth City. But London is your home, and you would want to defer that day as long as possible. 

"This means London, in its entirety, is technically yours. We shall not," it says, raising a claw to the other Masters, "seek the Sixth until all reasonable hope for the Fifth is lost. These are our terms: this your prize."

How long have you bought for the city? Years? Decades? Centuries? More than it had, certainly. You look around at its familiar, grimy streets; the poignant, flickering glow of its gaslamps; the people hurrying by to jobs and appointments, oblivious to the fact that you have saved them from a fate that has befallen four other cities. Perhaps London itself is your heart's desire. And a reckoning has been postponed.

Escape: You want to walk on the Surface again. You want nothing less than the sun, the sea, and the stars – the real stars!

Eventually, between them, they reach a proposal. Mr Hearts presents it to you. "There are certain laws that are, unfortunately, beyond us. The capriciousness of sunlight is one. Were you to return to the Surface there is every chance the sunlight might kill you, and there is nothing we could do to prevent it. However, there are places where the sun is only an occasional visitor."

Mr Fires unrolls a map of the Surface, and stabs a claw into the top of it. "We will build you a home. Here. The sun is absent there nearly half a year at a time. The location looks to be somewhere in the arctic circle. Habitable, but hardly clement. 

Your Defeat

Yes, you can let the monkey win.

The Marvellous is over. In fact, if Beechwood is true to his word, it is over forever.

The Monkey asks you to come with him to get his reward.

 A pair of Masters carries you and the Monkey – Hearts for him and Iron for you. Membranous wings rip through their robes, and with a beat you are lifted aloft, borne to the highest chamber in the Bazaar.

You tell them the Monkey’s desire is to end the Marvelous for good. Hearts is very upset but Stones argues that after the ‘Mirrors Incident’ it should have been ended. 

"It would be a shame," purrs Spices. "The Marvellous has been terribly diverting, and the days are so very long." Sympathetic murmurs from the other Masters.

"Enough, Our truest currency, colleagues, is our word." Mr Wines is speaking, now. "This is entirely in the rules as you established them, Mr Hearts. It's hardly the monkey's fault."

"I must strongly object!" splutters Hearts.

'NOTED.' reads another note from Mr Iron. 'AND IGNORED.'

Item Rewards

Marvellous Monkey: A monkey, once called Gregory Beechwood, who achieved his heart's desire, regretted it, and (with your aid) brought about an end to the Masters' preferred entertainment, though it cost him everything. [Companion; Watchful +5, Persuasive +5, A Player of Chess +1, Dangerous -1]

The Robe of Mr Cards: The robe is huge and concealing, and glistens like wormskin. It contains an ingenious framework, which grants its wearer the profile and stature of a Master of the Bazaar. 'Mr Cards,' of course, is you. Every month you call at the Ormolu Door of the Bazaar, and are taken inside to undergo various painful but improving procedures. Already you have grown a few inches, though your posture suffers. Your ears are lengthening. And one day – one bold, magnificent day – those nubs on your shoulder blades will be wings. [Clothes; Persuasive +11, Dreaded +2, Artisan of the Red Science +1]

Newly-Cast Crown of the City of London: Fresh-forged from authentic starlight (carried from the High Wilderness in the Bazaar's vaults) this magnificent crown denotes your position as Regent of London. It heavily implies that you are in the line of succession, and gleams like the promise of power. It has been made to your exact size, for it will only ever adorn your head. The Masters have promised you that. [Hat; Persuasive +13, Respectable +2, Mithridacy +1]

A Leasehold on All of London: This is the very contract by which Her Majesty agreed to sell London to the Masters. It is a labyrinth of legal complexity and metaphysical demarcation – partly written in English, partly in Latin, and partly in the Correspondence. As a result, it is best stored in a fireproof steel tube. The text has been meticulously amended in order to extend the 'guaranteed period' in which 'it is prohibited for the previously-specified parties to arrange the replacement, abdication, or discontinuation of London' in favour of 'any other metropolis of comparable significance and succulence.' The exact duration of the extension is not specified: as with all the best legal precedent, it makes much hay of the word 'reasonable' – 'for a reasonable period,' 'to a reasonable observer,' and so on. No doubt some lucky court will be expected to work out the details at a future point. A final, recent clause specifies that the owner of this leasehold (that's you) is entitled to a monthly stipend of revivifying peach brandy to 'further and ensure that party's longevity and rude health.' [Home Comfort; Shadowy +10, Respectable +2, A Player of Chess +1]

A Palatial Holiday Home in the Arctic Circle: A Surface mansion of your own, dappled in genuine moonlight. It enjoys commanding views of dense pine forests, and basks in the infinite hues of the Aurora Borealis. The mansion is only accessible via a secret funicular connecting to the Travertine Spiral. When the sun is absent, for several months of the year, you can travel there and breathe fresh air, and hear birds, and walk in real, new-fallen snow. [Home Comfort; Watchful +10, Bizarre +2, Mithridacy +1]

The Marvellous: This deck – consecrated at the Root of Need – was used in the ancient and treacherous game known as the Marvellous. Player after player was broken upon it. But since you forsook your heart's desire, proving you were not subject to your own wants, the cards have been obedient. Now, they anticipate your needs, and seem eager to please. When you play with them it's as if they're speaking to you. Via their oblique language of numbers, faces and combinations, they hint of broader, grander games played behind the skin of the world. [Weapon; Persuasive +13, Bizarre +2, A Player of Chess +1]

[celticwaterwitch]

A Witch’s Apothecary is full of many strange things. 🌿 From bones and bat wings to magical waters, sand, and strange plant things. 🌿 In this snapshot of my Apothecary you can see some of the tools and I have been working with. I will keep silent on what they were used for. 🌿 However, I will talk about what is in the image! 🌿 2 different magical waters. One local and the other is my Samhain Tide moon water. 🌿 Crushed and powdered garnet, several vials of sand. Bees wax tapers, Beth Root, Angelica Root, Myrrh Resin, Olive Leaves, Powdered Pink Roses, and a chest of Hawthorn Thorns. 🌿 What is in your Apothecary right now? 🌿 If you like combining your Water Magic with plants check out my book Water Witchcraft: Magic and Lore from the Celtic Tradition. Where I included several aquatic plants, seaweeds and sacred trees associated with magical wells! 🌿 Link in Bio! Learn more at WaterWitchcraft.com https://www.instagram.com/p/CH0thMoHEZy/?igshid=ih2kr1l6vgrf

[felicianacariocapistoles]

Jay’s favorite cartoons of the decade

I’m bored, so I’m gonna join that bandwagon. Here are my favorites in no particular order and reasons why they’re my favorites and even favorite characters.

1. My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic.

The animation is bright and colorful. This is also the first cartoon I watched with my first born niece so it has a special place in my heart because of it. Also this may sound corny-- but it showed me how to be a better friend (and also how to spot the phony friends that I had left) Fav characters- Pinkie Pie and Discord

2. Young Justice 

I was born a bat fan. My dad’s fav is Batman. The first thing I learned to read? Batman comics. So you better believe I’ve seen/read all things DC Comic related (this blog used to be all about DC Comics) and when this was announced? I was super excited. I was even constantly binge watching it just in hopes of having a 3rd season (which I’m disappointed in, but not wanna get into that) Fav characters- Nighting, Superboy, Wally West, Batman, Bart Allen, Artemis, Brion, Halo, and Forager 

3. Gravity Falls

It’s Disney, how can I resist? It has wonderful animation and a town full of fun characters, lore, and mystery. What’s not to love about it? Fav characters- Stanley Pines, Bill Cipher, and Soos

4. Dreamworks Dragons

I’m a fan of the HTTD movies, so hearing they got a show? Fantastic! They kept most of the same voice cast and introduced us to more awesome dragons and characters! Fav characters- Hiccup, Daggur, Gobber

5. TMNT (2012)

I grew up on re-runs of  the corny 80s series and later the fantastic 2003 series (which is STILL the best TMNT series ever) so when this came out? I was both excited and hesitant because...CGI animation and I have an iffy relationship. I watched this version with my nieces, we all loved it. This version has my favorite Splinter origin story (but not my fav Splinter-- that’s 2003) Fav characters- Raph, Mickey, Donnie, Casey, Karai

6. Rick and Morty

The first adult cartoon I ever liked tbh. Interdimensional travel and family drama? Love that shit, lol Fav characters- Morty, Summer, Beth, Rick, Bird Person

7. Star vs The Forces of Evil

It’s a little weird and a little wild. Also I’m a slut for anything to do with magic so of course this is gonna grab my attention! (until season 3, but again, I digress) Fav characters- Star, Marco, Eclipsa, Globgor, Janna, Tom

8. Ducktales (2017)

Funny...At first I didn’t want to give the show a chance. A reboot of a classic childhood cartoon? No thanks. Wasn’t a fan of the animation either or some of the characters redesigns at first. (some I’m still not fond of tbh) Then it premiered the day after my birthday for a full 24 hours, replaying the same 1 hour episode...I must’ve watched it at least ten times that day. Never go by your first impression and always give something a shot is what this show taught me! Fav characters- Donald Duck, Louie Duck, Huey Duck, Violet Saberwing, Launchpad McQuack

9. Tangled the Series/Rapunzel’s Tangled Adventure

BEST PRINCESS/MOST RELATE-ABLE PRINCESS IS GETTING A SHOW? SIGN ME THE FUCK UP!!! Much like TMNT 2012, I was excited and hesitant about this. The promos said she had her hair back? I was so confused and was hoping they’d give a logical explanation and not like “lol its back, deal with it” and I’m so glad they didn’t do that. The cast is the same as the movies and some new fun characters added along with backstories of them and lore of the kingdom.  Fav characters- Rapunzel, Eugene, Lance, Varian

10. She-Ra and the Princesses of Power

When I was a little kid I didn’t have much for television, but my older sister had a bunch of She-Ra and He-Man episodes on VHS so I would watch those...I forgot they existed until memes of them popped up. Then the show was announced. Gonna give it a shot aaaaaaand. Oh no. I fell in love. Fantastic animation. Written by a woman? Strong female characters galore? Yaaaaaas. Fav characters- Catra, Bow, Adora, Double Trouble, Scorpia, Entrapta

[brooklynislandgirl]

Tarot

Ashes to Stars || Accepting

Tony understands. Strege litter the branches of his family tree like quiet but beautiful and strong leaves, laced through each bough in traditions, lore, and practices of home remedies and the like even to this day. She is absolutely certain that this is why he settles down on her couch with two cups of coffee ~one for each of them~ without batting so much as an eyelash to find her taking a peek into the wisdom of the cards. She murmurs her thanks, that softly adoring mahalo of hers as she takes a sip. Closing her eyes and savouring the warmth, she gestures vaguely at the deck and her lips twitch in a butterfly smile. “Wanna?” It is all she asks and then watches him as he takes the deck into his hands and shuffles them with the same confidence he might during a Friday night poker game. Tony’s hands are large but graceful, and she can’t help but admire him while he does so. They cut the deck, reassemble, and then she begins to lay out the spread. Without a question he’s asked aloud, Beth’s interpretations are both honest and real, she’s not simply telling him what he wants to hear. In fact, she almost doesn’t want to tell him at all. They both know this is the danger of reading for family. The first card flipped left to right causes her to frown. “Nine of Pentacles, reverse,” she says. “Dis bein’ you in relationship t’ ya situation or question. I see ya bein’ used by someone or more dan one person, t’ boost deir self esteem. Or breakin’ da promises made t’ ya. Someone take advantage of ya trust, or cousin’ public humiliation to ya. Someone who’s a cad, a social climber or opportunist.” A flicker of anger like a firefly lives and dies in her eyes, protective as she is of him. She can’t tell if this is a work situation or a matter of the heart but either way, the seed is planted in her mind that she will see justice done. The card laid over the top of the first is the Seven of Swords. “Dis represent da positive forces or assets in ya favour. It’s not always a positive interpretation, so it can also indicate da nature of an obstacle dat hinders progress. Wha’ I see here is acceptance, limited success. Ya ability to adapt by releasin’ da old t’ renew ya spirit. Rejectin’ outside expectation so you can fashion ya own lifestyle. You have more confidence dan ya believe. An’ I see ya release from da grip of material question’ for some higher pursuit.” The third card is placed below the first two, an owl spreading wings and flying low over a lake, the full moon above it, bathing the owl and the lake in glowing silver light. The Moon. “Dis one can be seen as a message from ya beddah angels. Or you know, could speak t’ ya aspirations. Now, da moon represents powerful emotions an’ imagination. Your intuition an’ empat’y, da kine make you such an amazing detective. You seek mysteries, meet strange encounters wi’ a calm an’ balanced mind. Dis tells me, with ya creativity an’ sensitivity dat ya need to learn mo’ beddah control, a warning dat ya might become fascinated by phantasmagoric dreams or flashes from da subconscious, leadin’ to second guess yaself. Dat ya need light of reason to guard against influence an’ deception.” Her brows narrow and she peers up at Tony as if she’s looking for something specific in his eyes. “Ya havin’ more dreams of late, feels like dey gettin’ prophetic in a way. Ya attracted attention of unseen forces. Put a pin in dis an’ I’ll show ya some t’ings later.”

She turns the next card and sets it atop the current spread. “Crown position, which is past and influences currently givin’ rise to ya question or situation, an’ dat’s Two of Swords, reverse.” She sighs, that anger coming back. “You encounter lies an’ deceit. Which in turn let ya down. Made ya accept dat you misjudged someone, an’ brought to light cowardice in oddahs. Which lemme tell ya, Tony, dis seems to me like it’s all about work. Gibbs, Jeanne, Z…Zeba, Timo, everybody.” The next card is the Three of Wands, representing Tony’s preoccupation of his subconscious which might filter into his waking life, affecting moods and outlook. It is the underlying theme of his dreams and his emotions, and she tells him so. “You’re lookin’ f start a new enterprise or business, investigatin’ new directions. You wan’ adventure an’ are willin’ to distribute energy an’ resources, but da mere t’ought is makin’ ya feel heckin’ nervous. On one hand, ya don’ like gamble on da unknown, but somet’ing new gives you an optimism ya mebbe believe ya lost. I say… broaden ya horizons. You know if you need it, I’m ya perfec’ safety net f’ fall back on. But you already sacrifice so much, an’ ya been so unhappy…” She trails off. She hates to see him suffer, and she knows the kind of misery perching vulture-like on his shoulders lately. But the point isn’t to get her personal take, but that of the universe. “Dis one, represents your relationship wi’ oddah kine. Knight of Cups.” If Tony’s hair were longer, the youth on the white horse riding in from the waves might have looked like him. “Didn’ need card t’ tell ya, ya one romantic man. Considerate, creative, artistic sort. You could be a musician, a poet, a diplomat. On ya horizon, wi’in ya social circle, dere’s a promising proposal or collaboration. An’ opportunity f’ learn via a friend or lover. New ideas, new romance, a strong sense of loyalty here. Are you…are you t’inkin’ of buyin’ a ring?!” She rises up from the floor, unfolding her limbs from a lotus position, to crowd him on the couch. “Why ya nevah tell me? Who is it? Or…or mebbe… someone gonna aks you to marry dem. I’m callin’ it righ’ now… I get t’ be ya Wahine of Honour. I’m so ready f’ punch people in da face t’ make it a happy day!” Buoyed by her own convictions, Beth doesn’t uncrowd him to continue with the reading, though she does pause now and then to giggle gleefully. “Dis one, ya Self position. Your psychological state, what will greatly influence ya outcome. “I see.. Midsummer…da solstice. A cauldron of all good kine for ya heart. Ya ready for a new chapter in ya life, one filled wi’ natural beauty, delight an’ romance. You want relief an’ well-being for yaself, to feel ya life blossoming. It also indicates seduction an’ pleasure, which feels like somet’ing you been putin’ off. Wen last ya have good sex, or a weekend away from da team? Wen last ya just had some gentle an’ inspirin’ surroundings or company? You crave warm encouragement, a hint of luck, an’ da swell of an enchanted evenin’. And certainly none of dat wi’ like…me.” She turns, makes guppy-lip kissy face at him then laughs. Not that she doesn’t like the time they spend together, nor that she thinks he hates it, but sometimes your cousin is the last person you should leave the party with when you’re not in Alabama. But then she sobers with the flipping of the next card. “House position, environmental or unseen forces influencin’ ya. Queen of Wands, reverse. Could be an actual strident, sharp-tongue woman, or unpleasant company nag at you. Anger cousin’ someone t’ become judgemental an’ habitually suspicious. Unsympat’etic behaviour, alienation. If I had a guess, you’ve had anoddah run in wi’ Gibbs.” “Ya Hopes..” A card turned over. “Huh. Ace of Wand. Ya hopes an’ fears revolve around inspiration an’ risin’ to a challenge. A desire f’ self reliance, a growth in spiritual strength. Ideas empower by desire. Framed by quick t’inking, humour, balance. Fruitful plans, far reachin’ ideas, an’ da empat’y an’ understandin’ dat comes with it.” Another pause, and this time it comes with a hug before she flips over the final card. “Ya potential outcome…is Temperance. I see…tempering an’ moderation. Adaptation, managin’ a volitile situation in a calm, meaningful way. You standin’ at a liminal space in ya life. Dere’s healing an’ reflection an’ new patience waitin’ for ya to choose it. Have clear boundaries, be a confident an’ outspoken survivor. Accept a beneficial transformation bein’ given to ya. Doin’ so will create a nurturin’ environment. Ya gonna feel protected, restful, able t’ finally take care of ya health, an’ findin’ well earned inner peace. An’ mebbe, jus’ mebbe ya glimpse da face of ya guardian angel.”