#THATS MORE THAN AN HOUR'S WORTH OF TYPING THAT MIND YOU | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

apprenticestanheight · 10 months ago

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More - Adam Stanheight x gn! reader

Alllllllll right!! It is my birthday and that means that I am officially one year older yay!! I'm not really big on celebrating my own birthday and instead of doing some big like, event type thing I wanted to just write a couple thousand words a week or two in advance so that I didn't have to worry about editing on the day of, and that's what this is!

This is a college-adjacent AU (Adam is canonically a hs dropout but I've been thinking about maybe working my way to a creative writing PhD lately and projected so thats where the college part comes in) bc I headcanon that Adam grew his hair out in his early twenties and also: recovery era leigh whannell my dearly beloved.

Fic type- this is fluff that leads into smut!!

Warnings - this fic is meant for audiences of 18+. Minors, do not interact. Other than that, religion is referenced once (in the context of the reader saying adams name like it's a prayer lol), the word cunt is used a few times, and the reader is gn for all intents and purposes but I wrote the fic with AFAB anatomy in mind as that is the anatomy I know best. Petplay is also kind of present here (the puppy nickname has wormed its way into several of my fics bc I try thinking of gn petnames and my mind goes completely blank oops)

As it turned out, it was easier than one expected to get someone who wasn't an attendee into your college library. You'd snuck Adam into it without a care in the world, yearning for someone to lean against when you hit a breaking point in your studying while your closest friends were two-thirds of the way into breaking points of their own.

Adam was happy to leave the crappy apartment he lived in, though. He worked forty-hour weeks but his boss had mentioned that there was unclaimed PTO so Adam took the four days he was offered from the 186 days that had been accrued and relished in the fact that he was being paid not to work for approximately a day and a half before he yearned for fresh air.

When you'd asked him to come with you to finish up the last of the work you needed to do to finish up your thesis on your 22nd birthday, Adam had jumped at the opportunity and agreed to meet you near the charity shop that was a fifteen minute walk from his apartment and a fifteen minute drive out from your campus.

Of course, in his delight he'd ended up showing twenty minutes before the time you'd agreed, so he ducked into the aforementioned charity shop and looked around to occupy the time he had before you'd meet up with him.

He found a camera for fifteen bucks, three rolls of film and a camera bag included in that deal and couldn't resist. Scott gave him $200 a few times a month for printing up a hundred copies of his bands posters to hand out, and his paycheck had run in time for the rent and groceries to eat it completely, so the two hundred was something like lifesaver.

He'd gotten $400 that January because Scott and his band were doing a lot of gigs, which came as a bit of a surprise--Adam had heard Scotts band play before. Scott was lucky most people didn't pay much attention to bar music.

That $400 was originally going to take purpose at least partially as gas money because there were some distances that it just wasn't worth walking, maybe the purchase of a pack of cigarettes from the corner store that always had deals on them--$3 for two packs was the typical deal going on, and something Adam had used to his advantage more than once in the year since he'd become legally eligible to smoke and drink--and not much else, but the camera seemed like a decent enough purchase. If he got good enough, maybe he could display the photos he took somewhere or sell them as prints to make up for the money he lost to rent and a few groceries during his first paycheck of the month, keep him from going hungry until the second paycheck of the month came in.

He dips out of the charity shop and grins when he spots you, lets you drive him and steals the rest of your energy drink when you talk about the fact that you're not sure why you thought you'd like the peach flavor, and that gets you where you are--sitting in the darkest corner of your college library, face pressed against Adams shoulder as he laughs meekly.

"You can do this," he says. "You have another, what? Three pages left and then it's done. Then you can go back to whatever else your creative writing PhD entails and worry about your dissertation next year, yeah?"

"That doesn't work," advises a close friend of yours, Aurelie. She's been studying for a masters in biology and has known you since 1993, when you were both eighteen and freshly new to the college campus. "I've tried it numerous times, Stanheight, and it doesn't."

"I should've gotten my bachelors and masters before I jumped into this," you mutter, words muffled by the sleeve of Adams baggy black sweater. "But of course the only PhD option within two hours of work was an accelerated course. Ugh."

Adam laughs pitifully, pulls your face away from his shoulder to kiss your forehead before he gets up and you give him your card to get you, himself, Aurelie and her girlfriend Samantha a coffee.

When he returns, Samantha is pulling a strand of bright green hair behind her ear and watching you struggle, eyes narrowing at the book you're trying to focus on reading to get something you need for your thesis. Aurelie is offering you a bite of the sandwich she'd brought, telling you that a bag of chips also has the potential to be yours if you can get the last of your necessary research done in time to meet your February 18th deadline.

Adam presses a kiss to the top of your head as he maneuvers back into sitting down, gesturing at the coffees to tell Aurelie and Sam which ones are theirs and which ones are yours and Adams.

Adam wraps an arm around your shoulders as you thank him, taking a sip of your coffee, the order for which Adam had memorized at some point in the four years of your relationship to that point. He kisses your temple in response, grabbing his own coffee from the tray and checking the time.

It's not until six grueling hours, sunrise and four mental breakdowns have surpassed that you're officially done with your thesis. Adam asks if you want to spend the night at his place--you're not going into classes tomorrow if the way that you talked about sleeping in is of any indication--and Aurelie gives you a high five and mentions one of the bags of Doritos she'd brought along to munch on as she studied but hadn't ended up touching.

"You officially owe them a thousand kisses, you know," Aurelie says as you tuck your notebooks into the satchel you've been using since Adam had gifted it to you when you'd walked across the stage and graduated high school three and a half years prior. "You've gotta do it. It's what they deserve."

Adam laughs, blue-green eyes meeting Aurelies hazel brown ones. "I know," he says. "Though, to be fair, I don't think they really expected three pages to turn into fifteen more tacked on."

"They did not," you state affirmatively. "Professor Mason better fuckin' love me for it, though. I hadn't expected to meet his maximum page count and I managed to, just barely. Give me the chips."

Adam and Sam both laugh at the come-hither motion you make with your finger as Aurelie gets a bag of Doritos from her bag and tosses them at you, laughing a bit herself.

"Gremlin person," she says, shuddering a little for dramatic effect. "I surrender an offering to thee."

"The gremlin thanks you for it means the gremlin can put ordering dinner off for like, an hour and a half," you laugh a little, breaking open the bag of Doritos as Adam steals your two-litre water bottle from the table and takes a sip, leaving it open if you should decide to take a sip within the following thirty seconds.

You do, taking a break in your Dorito munching to take a sip of the water while Adam steals a chip from the bag and all of your preparations to leave are temporarily put on hold.

"I'm serious about the thousand kisses thing," Aurelie says. "Four breakdowns, fifteen pages and six different books in six hours. You have to do something to celebrate that."

Adam laughs, runs a hand through hair that he has yet to cut because he can't usually afford it and when he can, there are always better ways for money to be spent.

"I know you are," he says. "For the record, I am, too. I have a plethora of plans to make Y/Ns productivity feel worth it tonight, trust me."

"Gonna let me in on one of them?"

"I set aside $200 over my last few paychecks," Adam says. "Your birthday presents await, one of which is dinner."

"Two hundred from your paychecks--even multiple--means you have less grocery money, idiot," you scold lightly, glaring at him. Adam laughs, shakes his head, uses humor to fend off the anger issues that have a tendency to come up and bite him in the ass.

"Scott gave me $400 this month to print band posters," Adam says. "Also designed them, helped hand at least two and a half dozen out to people, but--you don't need to worry, okay? I have stuff covered and I had four hundred I could spend. I didn't spend it on groceries because I didn't need to, so it's okay."

Adam knows you only get defensive because of how his pay is and how his rent and groceries are in direct correlation. He works forty hours a week, brings in six hundred and fifty dollars every two. Rent eats four hundred during that first monthly paycheck and the other two hundred and fifty gets eaten by groceries.

The second pay period of that month is swallowed by other expenses. He sets aside gas money for the rarer times wherein he has to use his car, some money for cigarettes and other pop-up expenses as well as groceries for those two weeks.

His landlord had raised the rent in January of 1997, though. All he had left of his first monthly paycheck was a measly 100 dollars, which he couldn't buy very much with as it were. Scott had given him four hundred dollars for his efforts in graphic design and his access to a printer though, so he was cool as an ice cube in the few days before the second monthly paycheck he got was deposited into his bank account and he could afford to get a couple more things to last him through until next month.

"You promise it has no harm even though your landlord raised your rent to a stupid amount?"

"Rent being raised to a stupid amount means renovations," Adam throws you a cheeky smile. "The heater works, my showerhead isn't busted like it used to be, and the fridge, microwave and oven aren't running on fumes. It has it's perks."

"If I have to force you, you will be dragged by your gorgeous hair to the college apartments one of these days," you say. "They let non-attendees rent out the units year round for three hundred a month. You could actually afford to live if you went that route."

"You'd also be able to afford a haircut," Samantha chirps. You glare at her and Adam has to laugh, pressing his forehead against your shoulder and kissing it as he does.

You part ways thirty minutes later, waving goodbye to Sam and Aurelie as Adam asks who's place you want to go to.

You end up choosing to go to yours--you live in one of the apartment buildings owned and managed by your college. Its one of the many perks attached to the full ride scholarship you earned. It wasn't an easy feat, but you earned it from doing a collaborative photo and written essay that your english teacher called 'completely and totally heartwrenching' on the emotional support stray cats have proven to offer the homeless and those otherwise down on their luck.

Your apartment is nicer than Adams by half a mile, at least. Twelve hundred square feet, two bedrooms for the off chance someone has to move in. White walls, dark brown hardwood flooring, marble countertops in the bathrooms and kitchens, up-to-date appliances wherever such appliances are necessary. It's a good place, ten minutes out from your college campus by car, and you have every intent to keep living there and paying the rent attached once you're done with your PhD.

You and Adam debate dinner but decide to eat it later, go to your room while you talk idly. Adam tells you about his job, you tell him more about the professors who you like, and life carries on.

Adam relaxes in your room while you shower, happy to test the camera he'd bought in the charity shop by taking a photo of a polaroid you'd snapped the previous weekend. Adam has a love-hate relationship with the polaroid because of how goofy it is--it's a photo of him with two cigarettes in his mouth, one behind each of his ears, and one in his hand. They were horrendous cigarettes so the photo wasn't a waste, and he knew you loved it so he let it be.

You come out after fifteen minutes, hair damp as you wear one of Adams shirts and not much else. He grins as you settle into bed, head tilting at you before the question befalls his lips.

"How would you feel if I were to do what Aurelie practically demanded of me?" He asks, unawares as to whether or not you'd heard her remarks. "If I kissed you a thousand times?"

You ghost your teeth over your bottom lip, laughing softly. "You really think you'd be able to keep track?" Adams hand finds your thigh as he nods, palm running across it until he reaches your hip.

"I do," he says. "And besides--I think we kiss at least two hundred times when I wear the gray sweatpants in autumn anyway."

Your tongue juts out to wet your lip. "Okay," you say, realizing very quickly that 1000 kisses is basically the gateway to bliss. "I'm in."

"Really?" Adam asks, grinning like a fool. "Even if I take it slow and you start despising me for it?"

You nod, laughing a little as Adams lips find yours.

The first kiss is deep and intense, one of Adams hands on your hips as the other moves to up your face.

Adams tongue moves expertly around your mouth, thumb rubbing against the skin of your hip gently as he angles your head so that he can kiss you deeper. You moan into his mouth and he laughs a little, only pulling away when neither of you can breathe.

"999 to go," Adam whispers against your lips, smiling when the sound of your laughter meets his ears.

He kisses along your jawline.

998, 997, 996, 995

And then down your neck, tongue joining his lips as his hands move from your hips to your stomach, slowly and steadily inching up your chest.

You're happy to let Adam do as he pleases--it's a good enough gift for hitting twenty-two and because of studying and school getting in the way, you'd not really had much of an opportunity to give him anything significant for his 22nd birthday in the weeks before anyway.

One of your hands finds his hair as his lips remain focused on your neck and you undo the low ponytail he's got it in, moaning out his name as he keeps on going with his kisses.

994, 993, 992, 991, 990, 989, 988, 987

His hands keep their steady incline upwards, stopping to tease your nipples as he presses kiss after absolutely intoxicating kiss back up your neck and your jawline, grinning against your jawline when a soft moan falls from your lips and he tucks his knee between your thighs, pressing it against your core.

986, 985, 984, 983, 982, 981, 980

He captures your lips in his own, one hand moving up to cradle the back of your head and allow the kiss to deepen. The other one stays carefully focused on your nipple, and you laugh into his mouth as you realize he's fighting the urge to smile.

He pulls away to kiss down the other side of your neck and you manage to regain some of your breath thanks to your best efforts.

"Any regrets yet?"

"None at all," Adam laughs against your neck. "Oh, you're gonna be such a mess when I'm done with you. This is amazing."

979, 978, 976, 975, 974, 973, 972, 971, 970

You pull the shirt you'd stolen from Adam off your torso, fighting every single urge you have to grind against his leg as his kisses now start traversing down your chest.

He's the kind of person who commits to an action and it's a very good thing, ordinarily. He wants you to be so kissed up you forget your own name, only really remember his if you remember anyones name at all, and he's committed to that. His kisses will keep slow, his lips glorious and the pressure he puts onto your clit and aching core just enough to make you want to start grinding against him.

He kisses your breasts carefully, takes so much time with your nipples that you're almost completely sure there's a wet spot in his sweatpants from how wet the action has made you, laughs slightly when you moan loudly and become embarrassed.

969, 968, 967, 965, 964, 963, 962, 961, 959, 958, 957, 956, 954, 953, 952, 951, 950

"I love it when you get loud for me, baby," he whispers as he moves his lips down your chest and to your navel. You know he's going to take an absurd amount of time to kiss your hips, but you don't mind that.

You've always been particularly insecure about your hips and Adam has spent the majority of your relationship kissing them and holding them and telling you he loves them when your insecurity shines through. You hate your hips and you hate the hip dips you've been saddled with but Adam? You tell Adam he can't kiss your hips and he spends the next hour kissing you and telling you that you and your hips are fuckin' perfect.

He kisses down your navel and, of course, finds your hips. He glances at you for a second, waiting for your consent to kiss them because he knows it's an area of insecurity for you. When you nod, Adam can't fight his smile as he kisses across your stomach to your right hip, which he spends more time on than is probably worth.

He presses kiss after kiss there, probably leaving a hickey in the wake of his lips from his tongues involvement, murmurs an "I love you so much, baby," against your skin as he kisses across your stomach from your right hip to your left.

He takes his time with your left hip just as well, chuckles at the fact that you're so turned on that you've mindlessly let your moans go from quiet to average in terms of sound level because you've mostly stopped caring.

949, 948, 947, 946, 945, 944, 943, 942, 941, 940, 939, 938, 937, 936, 935, 934, 933, 932, 931, 930, 929, 928, 927, 926, 925, 924, 923, 921, 920

He kisses down to your dripping cunt, laughs when his lips press themselves against your clit because he knows just how wet he's managed to make you within maybe thirty minutes.

He moves his kisses from your wetness to your inner thighs, happy to kiss them for as long as he wants because he loves your thighs as much as he loves your hips--he loves them wholeheartedly, tells you as much as often as possible.

"Love your thighs, puppy," he whispers, breath ghosting against you in a way that makes you shiver. "You're so fucking perfect, yeah?"

You hum a response, unsure of how you're still even slightly coherent.

919, 918, 917, 916, 915, 914, 913, 912, 911, 910, 909, 908, 907, 906, 905, 904, 903, 902, 901, 900

He kisses from your right inner thigh to your left, once again taking his time because of how much he loves them. His hands slip under your thighs to find your hips, and you laugh a little, flustered because the fact of how much he loves your hips and hip dips when they're one of your biggest points of insecurity will never cease to turn you into a blushing idiot.

He laughs against your thigh, eyes keenly watching you. He's always been a bit voyeuristic so the fact that he's watching you is of little surprise, but you don't hate the way that he watches because he looks at you like you're the love of his life.

Granted, he always looks at you like that, but still. It's a nice emotion to register within the levelness of his gaze, the focus swimming in his blue-green eyes muddled by the love and adoration that rears itself upwards whenever he so much as glances in your direction.

899, 898, 897, 896, 895, 894, 893, 892, 891, 890, 889, 888, 887, 886, 885, 884, 883, 882, 881, 880

"So perfect," he whispers, kissing from your thigh back to the area just above your clit. He kisses from there back up your stomach, stopping once more to pay an absurd amount of attention to your hips and hip dips before he's kissing over your chest and you're another minute, maybe two, away from being so blissed out that you lose any and all senses of coherency onto which you've previously held.

"Adam," you whisper, saying his name like it's an unanswered prayer in an empty catholic church. "Adam, please."

His knee finds a spot between your legs again, and you moan as he presses it against your clit while his kisses move from your chest back to your neck.

879, 878, 877, 876, 875, 874, 873, 872, 871, 870, 869, 868, 867, 865, 864, 863, 862, 861, 860, 859, 858, 857, 856, 855, 854, 853, 852, 851, 850, 849, 848, 847, 846, 845, 843, 842, 841, 840

One of his hands finds your hip, the other one coming up to your lips. He presses his thumb against your bottom lip you take it into your mouth without a second thought, holding Adams gaze.

"Good puppy," he whispers, moaning lowly and pressing his forehead against the left side of your neck. "Oh, you're so good for me."

You moan, rutting your hips against his leg before you can stop yourself. The movement makes Adam grin, lift himself up so that he's staring down at you.

"You're desperate, aren't you?" He asks, a teasing grin on his face. "Keep doing that, mm? Grind against my leg, puppy. I know you want a release."

You moan, setting a pace with your hips as Adam slips his finger from your mouth and moves it to your chest, lips returning to your neck.

839, 383, 837, 836, 835, 834, 833 832, 831, 830, 829, 828, 287, 826, 825

Adams lips remain on your neck, occasionally drifting to your collarbone, upper chest and shoulders. He's relentless with his praise because he knows it's bound to make you melt, and make you melt it absolutely does.

"You're ethereal," he whispers, nipping gently at the skin of your collarbone. "I'm so proud of you, puppy. Workin' so hard to finish with your PhD program, you're fuckin' amazing."

You moan in response, needing more friction. Adam presses his knee against your clit further, adding just a bit more pressure--enough pressure to almost make you lose it.

You moan lewdly, hands slipping underneath his shirt to grip the skin of his back. The action makes Adam laugh, his kisses becoming more slow and deliberate as he starts kissing along your neck and eventually tilts your head up to reach the underside of your jaw.

"You're so perfect," he whispers.

824, 823, 822, 821, 819, 818, 817, 816, 815 814, 813, 812, 810

His kisses traverse back down your neck for what feels like the millionth time, and he kisses your shoulders and collarbone in a way that he knows makes you want him inside you more than will ever be reasonable.

When his kisses move down your chest and he adjusts so that he's not stuck in an uncomfortable position, you whimper at the loss of contact as his leg moves.

He's quick with it, though--one of his hands moves to your clit, rubbing slow circles as he tells you to grind against it in place of his knee.

809, 808, 807, 806, 805, 804, 803, 802, 801, 800

Before you can really register it, his lips are pressing kiss after senseless kiss against your inner thighs and you're moaning, begging words falling from your lips because all you want is to feel his tongue pressing flat against you while he slowly thrusts a finger into your folds.

He presses a few kisses against your clit, watching you through his eyelashes.

You look like a picture of bliss--one of your hands clutches the sheets, the other one has pulled itself through your hair so many times that a mess has been made of it, and you're biting your lower lip with anticipation.

His hands slide themselves under your thighs and over your hips, finding their favorite spot as his tongue presses flat against your clit. You press your head into the pillow it rests upon, moaning lewdly at the contact.

799, 798, 797, 796, 795, 794, 793, 792, 791, 790, 789, 788, 787, 786, 785, 784, 783, 782, 781, 780, 779, 778, 777, 776, 775, 774, 773, 772, 771, 770, 769, 768, 767, 765, 764, 763, 762, 761, 759, 758, 757, 756, 754, 753, 752, 751, 750

Adams tongue is skilled--eating you out is one of the things that gets you both off the quickest, and because of Aurelies words, you have zero doubt you're in for at least another few orgasms before Adam is done, but the way that his tongue feels against you is so good that you remain entirely unbothered by the idea, focusing on the way that his tongue feels when he presses it flat against your clit and the way that his hands feel as one locates your nipples and the other remains on your hip with the aim of keeping you steady.

When you start helplessly grinding against his face, Adam doesn't stop you. He moans, burying his face in your cunt and letting you ride his face paceless and senseless, clearly just wanting you to cum all over his nose, mouth, and chin.

When you come for the first time that night, you do so with a moan of Adams name before you release over his face. He keeps his tongue on your clit and works you through the aftershocks before he pulls away, lifting himself up to your level again and kissing you soft and slow, letting you taste yourself on his lips.

He cleans his face after your kiss, gets back into bed and presses kiss after kiss against your face, neck, and shoulders, delivering praise to you like it's nothing, and you can tell he means every word.

"You're amazing," he whispers. "You did so good for me, puppy."

Forty minutes of kisses go by, and you're happy to let Adam keep kissing you for the rest of time if he wants to.

749. 748, 747, 746, 745, 744, 743, 742, 741, 740, 739, 738, 737, 736, 735, 734, 732, 731, 730, 729, 728, 727, 726, 725, 724, 723, 722, 721, 720, 719, 718, 717, 716, 715, 714, 713, 712, 711, 710, 709, 708, 707, 706, 705, 704, 793, 792, 701, 700

"How many kisses down?" You ask, practically swimming in post-orgasm bliss.

"300," Adam grins cheekily at you. "It's been an hour and a half. That basically sets us up for another four hours."

"What time is it?" You ask. Adam checks the clock.

"About to be six thirty," he says. "We'll be done by around ten if you're still wanting me to actually kiss you a thousand times."

"Do you still want to?"

"I wouldn't tire of kissing you even if I gave it my all, so I'd like to, yeah."

You grin at him, nod. "Please kiss me again."

Adam does as you ask of him, smiling a little bit into the kiss as your hands slip underneath his shirt with the aim of eventually slipping the shirt over his head.

He pulls away to take his shirt and pants off, momentarily feeling guilt for being completely clothed while you were completely exposed.

The guilt fades when you're pulling him back into you by the neck and laughter bubbles up from his throat as he calls you a kiss fiend and moves to press kisses along your jawline.

You let him kiss you senseless, counting down the kisses while you have half the mind to do so, before he's taken you and turned you into a thoughtless, brainless version of yourself that's so clouded by bliss that any other emotion pushing past the weightlessness of how you'll feel is completely and totally inconceivable.

Adam has kissed you one hundred and fifty five more times across forty-five minutes by the time that you lose focus, as he's telling you to turn around so that he can kiss your back and you're doing as he asks because of how good the kisses feel and the fact that you never want them to stop.

He kisses along your shoulder blades, down the backs of your arms and the back of your neck, praising you and making sure you're not completely and totally blissed out by asking you to use your words and tell him how good it feels.

He kisses the backs of your hips, smiles against your skin and then turns you back around, kisses your lips sweetly as his hand trails down your chest, past your stomach, to your clit. He laughs, presses a kiss against your forehead when he presses his finger against your clit and you moan because it's throbbing and the touch feels amazing.

"Adam," you whisper. "Please."

Adam nods, rubs slow circles around your clit as his lips press themselves against your neck.

545, 544, 543, 542, 541, 540, 539, 538, 537, 3537, 535, 534, 533, 532, 531, 530, 529, 528, 527, 526, 525

The pace he sets with his finger is slow, his lips pressing kiss after kiss to your neck as you slip further and further into the bliss of it all. You're pretty much content to let Adam do whatever he wants to you at this point, all of the stress from completing your thesis and trying to figure out plans with Aurelie and Sam to celebrate your birthday melting away with every single one of Adams kisses and the pressure of his fingers.

524, 523, 522, 521, 520, 519, 518, 517, 516, 515, 514, 513, 512, 511, 510, 509, 508, 507, 506, 505, 504, 503, 502, 501, 500

Adam replaces his fingers with his thumb, pulls you into an open-mouthed kiss as he slowly thrusts his fingers into you.

You moan into his mouth, grinding against his fingers slowly.

"So good for me, puppy," Adam whispers against your lips. "God, you're so perfect."

You moan again in response, and Adams lips dip to your collarbone, paying attention to it like he hasn't since the kisses began. He fucks you with his fingers as his lips press kiss after fervent kiss against your shoulders, collarbone, and chest, dick throbbing because he hasn't let himself come yet.

When you're coming for the second time, Adam is kissing you and you're practically floating, willing to do any and everything he asks of you. His kisses are perfect and he knows how to make you teeter on the edge of release until he's ready to let you go, and he does such, kissing you senseless until he curls his fingers inside you with each of his thrusts and you're coming undone around his fingers within five minutes after those ministrations had begun.

You moan his name into his mouth, and he pulls away from the kiss as you clench around his fingers.

Clean up is simple enough--after he's kissed you through the aftershocks and pulled his fingers out of you, he simply licks his fingers clean while you watch him, dazed but mesmerized.

499, 498, 487, 496, 495, 494, 493, 492, 491, 490, 489, 488, 487, 486, 485, 484 483, 482, 481, 480, 479, 478, 476, 475 473, 472, 471, 470, 469, 468, 467, 466, 465, 464, 463, 462, 461, 460

"Adam," you whisper. "There are condoms in my nightstand. Need to feel more than your fingers."

"Y/N--" two times across three hours feels like a stretch, and he knows you have zero intention to go to class for the rest of the week because you've finished up with your thesis and thus, there's no point until you have to pass it in on it's due date, but still. Adam doesn't want to leave you so sore that you can't walk when you're a college student with more things to worry about than he.

"Please," you whisper. "I'll be fine, I promise. I had hoped the 1000 kisses thing would mean I got fucked senseless anyway. I already told my professors not to expect me for another week because of how much work I've done, and how badly I need a break. I need to feel you and you're throbbing because you've only fucked me with your tongue and your fingers, so it's a win-win situation."

Adam presses another two kisses to your forehead before he rolls over in the bed to grab a condom. He takes off his boxers as you tear the condom open, rolling it onto his length and relishing in the way that he moans at the contact of your hand with his cock.

"Fuck, Y/N," he moans quietly.

You let him position himself at your entrance, moan at every inch he pushes into you because of how good it feels. Adams cock is long and thick and nothing you'll ever get tired of.

Once his full length is inside you, he moans, pressing his forehead into the pillow to the right of your head as one of your hands finds his hair and the other rests on his neck. Your thighs move to wrap around his waist, and he kisses the side of your jawline as he waits for you to adjust.

459, 458, 457

When you give Adam the okay to start moving, he does so, his lips pressing kisses just about wherever they can reach.

It doesn't take Adam very long to make you see stars, the kisses that he delivers adding to the mindlessness of the way you feel. Every single minute that passes and you get closer and closer to forgetting what your own name is, Adams name the only clear thought that runs through your mind, repeating itself over and over like a mantra that only barely manages to keep you from floating away.

456, 455, 454, 453, 452, 451, 450, 449, 448, 447, 446, 445, 444, 443, 442, 441, 440, 439, 438, 437, 436, 435, 434, 432, 431, 430, 429, 428, 427, 426, 425, 424, 423, 421, 420, 419, 418, 417, 416, 415, 414, 413, 412, 411, 410, 409, 408, 407, 406, 405, 404, 403, 402, 401, 400

Adam keeps going after you've released and you're happy to let him, the feeling of him inside you too good to do anything but relish in. He moans your name in between his kisses, chasing the high of his own orgasm while also wanting to bring you to the edge of a fourth.

"Fuck," he moans. You're practically brainless beneath him, a cock-drunk mess of moans as your nails dig into his back and the hand that's kept a hold on his hair holding it so that it doesn't fall to the side because you'd taken the elastic out of it without thinking.

"Adam," you moan, his name the only coherent thought you have.

"You feel amazing," he responds, kissing your forehead. "Fuck, baby. You feel so good around me, mm?"

You moan in response and his kisses return to your neck, kissing along the underside of it and up to the underside of your jaw before his lips move back to your shoulders again.

399, 398, 397, 396, 395, 394, 393,392, 391, 390, 389, 388, 387, 386, 385, 384, 383, 382, 381, 380, 379, 378, 377, 376, 375, 374, 373, 372, 321, 370, 369, 368, 367, 366, 365, 364, 363, 362, 361, 360, 359, 358, 357, 356, 355, 354, 353, 352, 351, 350

He's apologizing lightly for a hickey that forms on your neck as he continues thrusting, and you're so blissed out from being fucked into the mattress that you tell yourself you'll give him a response later.

He slows the pace of his thrusts enough to drive you up the wall just a little, keeps that pace while he kisses you senseless for a long fifteen minutes before he kicks the pace back up again, dialing it from a six to an eleven within seconds.

349, 348, 347, 346, 345, 344, 342, 341, 340, 339, 338, 337, 336, 335, 334, 333, 332, 331, 330, 329, 328, 37, 326, 325, 324, 323, 322, 321, 320, 319, 318, 317, 316, 315, 314, 313, 312, 311, 310, 309, 308, 307, 306, 305, 304, 303, 302, 301, 300

Adams pace is quick, evenly timed, and perfect. You can hardly control how loud your moans start getting and Adam loves it, laughs when you press your forehead into the side of his neck in a break where he'd stopped kissing you because of your embarrassment.

"You're cute when you're embarrassed, puppy," he whispers, kissing your forehead. You hum your disagreement and he kisses you as deeply as either of you can manage, hand cradling your neck to allow the kiss to be so deep.

He pulls away and presses his lips across your chest again, keeping count where you've lost the ability to because of how fucked out you're starting to feel.

One hundred more kisses pass you by, and by that point Adams kicked the pace up just enough.

You come with a whisper of his name, saying it like it's the most meaningful word you'll ever speak. Adams teeth bite gently against your neck and he moans your name as your fourth release triggers his first, and he releases into the condom.

After thrusting into you through the post-orgasm aftershocks, Adam pulls out. He disposes of the condom while you go pee to avoid a UTI, and when you're back in bed, Adams lips are kissing you again and you're so blissed out that all you can do is stare at him lovingly.

The last two hundred kisses go by within fifteen minutes, Adams lips soft against your skin as he delivers whispered praise and sweet nothings in between each of the kisses he drops over your face, your arms, your hips, stomach, and thighs.

When he leaves, you're smiling like a buffoon and so happy your heart could melt with the joy you feel. He gets a bath going and then helps you to the bathroom, helps you into the bathtub while he reaffirms that he's proud of you for all the work you'd done with your thesis and acknowledges how hard it's been for you.

You let Adam wash your hair, exhausted and still not very coherent as he does so. It's very easy to melt into him and the way that his hands feel, and you let yourself do so without a second thought.

You agree to order pizza as a late-night dinner--it's nearly ten o'clock by the time you're both discussing it--and Adam helps you out of the bathtub, gets you to sit on the toilet while he blowdries your hair and leads you back to the bedroom.

He laughs when you point out the drawer of clothes you have that belong to him, kissing your forehead and making a remark about a pair of sweatpants he's not seen in close to two years. He gets dressed in the clothes from that drawer, helps you do the same because every single one of your limbs feels like Jell-o--completely and utterly unstable.

He grabs your phone from where you keep it, on the television stand in your living room, orders your birthday pizza while the two of you lay in your bed.

"Happy birthday," he says after the phone call is done and the pizza order is placed.

"Thank you," you hum, pressing a kiss to his shoulder. He grins a little, runs a hand through your hair and hums contentedly.

"I love you," he whispers after silence has settled.

"I love you more," you respond, half-asleep but so content your chest aches with it.

Adam presses a kiss to your forehead, holds you close and for a minute, feels as though letting you go is an impossible feat, hopes that nothing ever comes around to separate the two of you from one another.

His gaze shifts from you to the window, hand running through your hair as he watches the sky and listens to the sounds of the outdoors at two hours before midnight.

He's so content it makes him ache, and he knows you feel the same.

All in all, you have to think, as you drift off, that it's your best birthday yet.

#adam stanheight #adam stanheight x reader #saw 2004

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the-s1lly-corner · 11 months ago

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Yeahhhh good to see TADC requests are back up! Hope you’re feeling a lot better with everything going on! Also belated Merry Christmas?

If it’s not much, could I request a scenario for Kinger? If I didn’t misread or anything, I don’t think it was written anywhere that I have to specify requests. Hopefully so cuz I don’t have something in mind other than angst. Also cuz you said that you sometimes have trouble coming up with ideas for certain characters, so u can imagine pretty much everything so it’s not restricting. If you want me to specify, tell me!

Thanks! ^^

General Kinger x Reader Angst stuff!

wooooo definitely weird sitting at my computer again; typing on it while i wait for the oven to preheat because admin craves pizza eheheheheheh uhuhuh!! hope this isnt too bad! its probably going to take a while to get back into the swing of answering requests + writing for TADC, even if its only been like a week most of this ended up being about kingers grief over queenie/queener LMAO was originally going to have this be multiple things but i got too sucked deep into the grief idea

i think we should get the obvious out of the way, but kinger has a problem with zoning out and mixing things up; oftentimes leading to him becoming distressed or frightened. regardless of if youre his friend or partner, youre going to need to exercise a fair amount of patience, especially in the beginning if you want to build some level of trust between the two of you

as for romantic stuff, i dont think he ever truly will fall out of love with queenie/queener, its like how widows never truly stop loving their partners after theyve passed. you try not to think about the idea that he would still be with queenie if she hadnt abstracted... you try not to let it get to you but it still rears its head in, you know?

does notice that something is up with you but you wont open up about it because you feel so horrible about being jealous over a woman who isnt even around anymore in a way that she can likely never come back... which leads to kinger becoming more worried for you over time as you keep trying to shut everything down

imagine it leads to a blow up and you just break down or even lash out because you feel so disgusted with yourself and kinger is just standing there in shock unsure of what to do

very tricky situation, because theres so many factors to take into account. the abstraction, kingers grief, your wellbeing and self worth, things like that

as much as i want to say that kinger would be all over you trying to make it better, because he doesnt want you to abstract, i think that the best course of action would be for you guys to spend a few hours apart at the bare minimum.. whether thats what ends up happening is debatable

or even worse, you abstract in the process of your breakdown, leaving kinger with two lost partners

not totally related, but i like to think kinger leaves flowers and the like at queenies door.. as often as he can.. maybe sometimes he stays at her door talking about how his day went and how everyone else is doing... i think he would do the same for you if you abstracted, too, regardless of if you guys dated or not

unrelated to the reader but i like to think kinger and gangle have a grandpa/granddaughter relationship and he tells her about queenie and tells her about his abstracted wife and

he gets misty eyed

#tadc x reader #the amazing digital circus x reader #digital circus x reader #kinger x reader #kinger x you #kinger imagine

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leninova1997 · 2 years ago

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Friend, I'm curious: do you also have writer's blocks? Or with organizing and planning, this is not a problem for you? I ask you because I'm just feeling kinda creative again after a whole month, and I don't know how to feel about it. How long does it last for you when (if) you have it?

Yes, i have had writers block numerous times. Sometimes its the result of long mental exhaustion, sometimes it just jump at you and dont let you go for a while. Its not the most predictable thing and its not always the easier to deal with especially if you have something to work on. The best solution is always to take a longer break (even a few weeks if its that severe) and get yourself into reading (one book, a bunch of novellas, anything that is complex, not written in a simple way however contains a lot of art and complex solutions through the words and storyline. So, mostly classics). Of course it is advised on its own to sometimes get away from writing to pretty much have your creativity and mind "resynthesize" the resources (often writers block, when you keep your mind away from it, this is what it brings out, so its not all that bad and stuff...at least from my experience), but reading (maybe a lot) can speed up the process of returning significantly. I still dont like it overall, however, it can easily lead you at the end to a much more fulfilling creation journey and allows you to unleash even more good stuff and happiness inside. So in most cases its 100% worth the struggle.

I have to tell you though, its pretty normal to have a wavering tendency in writing or in any kind of creation form. Any kind of attitude is possible since the focus is not always on art and the case is heavily influenced by things and problems in life, hormones, diet etc.. So overall you dont always feel like you can do it, very little or almost nothing comes to mind, then one day you wake up and you run to the keyboard to spend your whole day typing your ideas. Its again, sometimes unpredictable, reading can help it too, but not immediately. Thats why it is normal too to live like this. Can you imagine doing nothing but writing? Like 8-10 and even more hours a day? I know, it sounds fun at first, but when a block hits or you just run out of ideas (or the "connection thickens" with the art, its another problem that occurs when you overwork on something), you can easily fall into a shorter or longer regression period that brings creation to nowhere. It always depends on what you work on, how complex it is or/and how many thoughts you put into it. I know authors who almost never or rarely have these problems since they either do something else (not really reading, but the idea is not so bad after all, so if you feel like you are even more lost than should be, i recommend this method also for possible gaining) or what they create is so simple, even the editing is left out so in the end the mental exhaustion is less likely to hit them. But at the same time, i know writers who had the issues or even blocks for months and years! Well, its truly something.

In my case, blocks usually last a few days, maybe a week so during those i quickly move on to something (reading is obvious to at least keep up so the return in the end is much easier but the other hobbies help a lot too) or i just have my story "take a nap" in my head 😂😂. I remember the most serious lasted like 6 months, back in 2016-2017 when i was in high school (it was not long after i started writing in a "professional way"). It wasnt fun (its like running to a brick wall and again and again but it doesnt bother), however, it made me realize, prevention is much more important and on its own actually cheaply accomplishable even if you sometimes wish to overwork out of joy (im talking about doing writing longer than 10-12 hours), day after days.

So what i do usually?

As i said, having your artpiece sometimes sent out to relax is actually very useful. You leave it alone for a few days when you feel like, its good enough/almost finished and after that, with fresh thoughts, you return back to it. It not only reduces the change of the block, but allows you to see the writing in a different perspective. Its easier to spot mistakes, rewrite things that are not matching well, implement new ideas, etc. Thats why i like to say, writing is an art of patience where you can never let your focus go and at the same time, you have to have the ability to feel where things belong in your creation from place to time, though purpose. Oh boy, now i totally sound like somebody who lives by the zen 😂😂😂

Make a list, a list, a list, a list (okay not this many). Have your phone or/and a notebook around and write down immediately what pops in your mind (that is good enough in your opinion). If you even have the opportunity take your time and open up the thing: make points in connection with it, expand it as your imagination allows it, create another list within in it if necessary. This usually doesnt take that long in time, however, it initiates 2 things: its more likely to start writing from there and when you need ideas or the "spirit/essence" is lacking (it sadly happens), you can always read them out to have a little bit of aid (or a lot, because i think it works well). If you feel like you wanna be just as crazy as me (lol 😂😂), you can take your list and type it in. Its not only for preserving and having everything together but adds another opportunity to work on your ideas even more. These lists on their own can be very small or huge like in my case (26 pages long and pending, god dammit 😂😂). I highly recommend this method too when you dont really have the time to write, but would like to do some minimal work to "go somewhere". Its very inspiring too when you take a look at your list and see how many things are there to count on. This can make you start writing too, trust me

I hope i could help 😇

#writing #write #writers block #writing advice

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sharpenote · 2 years ago

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Do you have any YouTube video essay recommendations?

Sure!! Keep in mind, I don't tend to get into super-niche ones, since after watching them once I just cycle them into the sleep rotation, so it's pretty likely you've heard of most of these already.

Pathologic is Genius, And Here's Why - a classic and one of my favorites, partly because i just genuinely love pathologic, partially because i get infinite use out of ARTEMY BURAKH'S TORMENTOUS NIGHTMARE. hbomb has a lot of video essays that i like, so I won't link them all, but safe to say you'll get a lot of mileage out of his stuff (i tend to stick to the media ones though rather than political - i already know shitty people exist so they tend to just stress me out a lot lol)

iBinged iCarly (and the follow-up video, The End of iCarly, as well as The Failure of Victorious and its follow-up, The End of Victorious) - I grouped these together a) because they're by the same guy and b) they're pretty inter-connected, since the shows are by the same showrunner (you know, that one notorious creep who made his fetishes his child actors' problems, among other things). Might be worth checking out The Scandal of Sam and Cat by him as well? I can't actually remember if I've seen that one so I know what I'm doing tonight lol. Anyway you've probably heard of these if not watched them (ie the 8 hour long Victorious video essay). I linked to the videos in a playlist so you can also check out his other video essays if you're interested in them.

The World Record History of Super Mario Sunshine any%, The World Record History of Super Mario Sunshine 100% (120 Shines), and The World Record History of Super Mario Sunshine's Most Competitive Level - what it says on the tin, all by the same guy, but there are tons of speedrunning world history videos out there.

SummoningSalt also has a ton of speedrunning world history videos available and is largely responsible for the popularity of the genre.

The Speedrun Where Link Stares at Rupees for 17 Hours - low% is a pretty niche speedrunning category, and this is probably the goofiest example of it. I love it. A short, 15 min dive into it, which is very funny to me considering the actual run's length. I really love gymnast86's stuff - he's great at explaining stuff for a casual audience, which always makes him fun to watch during his gdq runs, but it also works very well for stuff like this. This video and The Glitch that allows Zelda Speedrunners to time travel - which goes more in-depth into one of the tricks used in the run - are both on LowestPercent's channel, but his actual channel is here - he might have a few similar things there as well? But it's mostly actual speedruns and randomizers.

Why Knights of the Old Republic 2 is Beautiful; An Analysed Playthrough - as the name suggests, this is half-playthrough, half-analysis, but I'm counting it anyway because It's My List And I Want To. SulMatul has a few more video essay-type vids on her channel as well, including Pathologic Analysis; Themes of a Dying Classic and Dissecting Pathologic 2; Why It's The Best Game of 2019 (THATS RIGHT IM BRINGING IT FULL CIRCLE BABEYYY THIS LIST IS A TRICK TO GET YOU INTERESTED IN PATHOLOGIC) and one on We Know The Devil which I haven't watched yet but I HAVE played the game and it's incredible, and knowing Hayley's work I'm sure the video is great as well. Huuuge huge fan of her content, and I think out of all of these she probably goes deepest into the subjects she discusses.

I'm sure there's more I'm forgetting off the top of my head, but hopefully that's a decent start for you, anon!

Also, not a video essay, but I'd be remiss not to link it since I mentioned it in my original post: the 0.5x A Press video

#video essays #answered

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grimsneverendingfuneral · 1 year ago

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You've already written a book? Wow, that's impressive! I've always been writing but never quite finished anything. I have a lot of short stories stored in my computer and poetry in my various journals, but actually sitting down and committing to writing something for an extended period of time has always been difficult for me. I lose interest after a while, or get stuck on a scene and just give up on it. I have about three rough drafts of at least one hundred pages worth of material, but that's it. They stop there. How were you able to write your book? What is the story behind it? I know we writers hate when someone asks what our books are about, because it's not always about the plot, I would say, but more about the characters and the overarching themes present throughout the story, but I'm curious. I hope you don't mind me intruding in your ask box like this.

yoooo you're back!!! im so glad

yessss well i feel you really hard on the never finishing anything. I've always always been writing too, ever since i could but i never thought i'd get to write a book, quite honestly. i mean, i didnt even consider myself a writer until like last year and im fucking 25. i just kind of. wrote. didnt claim the "writer" title until one of my friends pointed it out like "hey, youre a writer" and i was like HUH?? so ya.

the way i wrote it was very circumstantial, honestly. i think in a way, thats what usually happens. a bit of circumstance, time, discipline, and most importantly PASSION is the perfect equation, at least for me. it was in a time when covid was coming to an end, i had a job but was out of work because i had broken my foot, and i had a whole room to myself cause i was living with my sister. i was also going through a david bowie obsession and listened to literally JUST THAT for three whole months. i wrote every day, all day. sometimes for 10 hours without really eating or drinking. i was OBSESSED. with this story, and these characters, and so im not really the person to ask how exactly you finish a book, because for me it was truly a near religious experience, like divine intervention type thing. it was like i was possessed. i couldnt stop. i loved it so much that it took over my whole life.

as for the stuck on a scene thing. honestly? like forreal forreal? you just have to change the scene that you thought you were gonna write. that's it. that's the answer. you just don't write that scene. you find something else. if its not coming to you like butter on a hot pan, sliding into your brain effortlessly and through your fingers, change it. or just don't write it. skip it. skip to another part of the story, or just straight up skip that scene and continue the story. im telling you, there aint not other way. you'll just stray further and further from that momentum you had, and get frustrated with yourself, and start overthinking your story, and all that, all for one scene that isn't even there.

and the dreaded discipline. look, we all hate it. the only thing you can do to combat the writers block is, and i cant emphasize this enough, write something else for a bit. put your story on pause, its okay, its always gonna be there, and write something with those same characters, but maybe theyre in an au, or another scene, or its just some little drabble of their lives. it helps immensely, even for your book. you get to develop their characterization, get to know them, their motivations, their speech patterns, and you get to have fun. it'll give you ideas, and once you're ready to kick yourself in the ass, go back to the book, and write one. fucking. sentence. just one. a shitty one. write a whole page without editing it as you go along. write simply and like youve never known what a sentence structure looks like, then when you're done, you can go back and edit. but its better to just write and have it be shitty but cohesive enough that its going somewhere, than to not write at all, right? thats my advice.

ok this shit is getting long as fuck and i didnt even answer your question as to what my book is about. i'll try to blurb it, for practice.

Set in 1973, it's about Percy, an astronomy loving eighteen year old Welsh guy with sleep apnea who moves to the city with his extremely religious parents. He finds a room through a new friend he meets at a bar, Gretchen, and moves in with Ren, a wearing-sunglasses-at-night sanguine type who's a storm about to ravage Percy's little village.

Ren has a secret room, secret hobbies, secret everything, and it drives Percy insane with prophetic dreams through his apneic episodes. With time, patience and a shared love of music, Ren begins to let Percy in on his tragic life, the person he lost and the reasons why he is the way he is, chaos personified. Percy begins to understand that he is a part of some equation, some mission Ren has been set on by the strange presence in their apartment.

The secret little room is the key to it all, and through the whispers in the trees and the voice in the walls, Percy will soon discover that Ren is not only someone who's happened to cross his path, but someone who he is falling in love with, someone fated for him. It's a story of self-discovery, mysticism, death, rebirth, redemption, friendship, and it's very gay. Very, very gay. Also set in the early 70s so there's the trials and tribulations of marginalized identities, good ass music, and a lack of electronic communication.

there are a lot of different elements to this story, like.... a lot of references to greek mythology, astronomy facts, sleep disorders, nightmare imagery, motifs, everything is all connected. Each character's name has a meaning to the story, and they all play a very important role. There's also like two plot twists and a secret character that i cant talk about heehee.

anyways FUCK this was crazy. i know you only asked like a couple of questions but im like sooooo into answering thoroughly. its honestly helping me understand some stuff, so thank you veryyyyy much for being curious, i really really appreciated. dont be shy if you ever want to come off anon and send me a message, im not gonna think anything weird of you lol. i know anon is like a safe way of lurking sometimes but id like to talk to you more if youre down.

#i love this #cause like.....i wanna go on and on about my shit in person to people but i always feel embarrassed or weird talking extensively about me #yknow #im not good at that #i feel like its annoying to ppl #i know thats me projecting but whatever #i wanna be able to talk about this for like two hours on end without anyone interrupting me #lol #grims echo

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weeping4cash · 1 year ago

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Whenever something drastically good or bad happens, my mind goes back to you momma dearest. Time has allowed me to grow around some of my grief of your loss but the guilt remains. The sadness of never saying goodbye and I’m sorry sticks still. More actually as time goes on and I leave young adult hood for full blown adulthood. I see you now. You “know” things when you’re younger, like spoken words that you comprehend but the empathy aspect is much broader and takes time to develop. You left me at 21, I’m 26 and damn if I don’t understand you more every year. It’s like re-grieving. What you must have been going through, knowing your limited time on earth. Knowing that some day you would leave the world earlier than you planned. What a concept. I can’t even imagine mom. What that must have felt like day to day, hour to hour, minute by minute. I always thought you were just “nice” when you’d get holiday cards for our home gas station staff. I knew you were sick then, it’s hard not to imagine putting the pieces together to empathize and really understand where that comes from. You were nice, but you were also dealing with your own mortality, and how you want to be remembered. What a person you were. Not just a mom. You were also a person. I can see that clear as day now. I wish I could tell you that thats clear now. The best I’ll be able to do until we see each other again is type here, and talk to you when I fail and achieve. You’re the first person I want to tell anything. Everything. Even now, there’s a hole you left that won’t ever be filled. I just have to continue to build friendships that simulate the safeness I felt with my mom. Build a life that demonstrates those horrible things I said and days we had were all worth it for you. Love you always.

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cascadianights · 1 year ago

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You couldn't come out to meet my friends Friday, because you got caught out late with the kids on the nature preserve you manage, and sprained your ankle

For a single instant I felt the familiar disappointed rush of "I knew he wouldn't make it," the urge to push away & to run as all the nights you canceled last minute flashed to the front of my mind. Dinners going cold and dates I went on alone

I got as far as a clipped, single word response. You immediately offered an explanation and a frown. How can those two lines carry so much fear, so much reticence? We're so afraid of entering the same dance again

But instead, I melted, and so did you. I used to be so angry, so dejected - I don't know whether thats more ludicrous because you're the type to be out saving the plains and teaching children, or because it's so close to the exact things I would be doing to have to cancel as well

It feels like we passed a test. But it also feels like a vivid reminder - you have as little say to your free time as ever. You can't commit to anything new because the commitments you do have are such that bubble over boundaries and steal days and sometimes weeks. You named your priorities long ago and those will never change, and that is more clarity than many ever have, but it feels that a romantic relationship will never be more than an afterthought on a list that subsumes all it touches

I see what you have to offer as a friend, and I accept it willingly and with open arms. But I think that you want more, and I know that I do. I try to hide it, but you're one of the most observant people I've met... and I know that every emotion I feel flits across my eyes and brows. I catch myself leaning towards you, body angled like a compass, I catch myself glancing just one more time at your smile or eyes. I catch you doing the same.

You're terrified because you want me and know you have no time to offer. But I recognize now the cost and worth of those stolen hours at dusk or dawn, always wanting to talk just a little longer, yawning and bleary eyed and smiling and encouraging me to stay for just another episode - if I want, of course

I know about the lack of time. I know how hard it is for you to communicate sometimes. I know how much darkness you carry and wade through, I know how much responsibility you put on your own shoulders.

You're terrified because you want me and but you don't want to dance with open flames once more.

I'm terrified because I want you and I don't want to be left out in the cold again.

I don't want to love someone who can't tell me why they want to be with me. I don't want to wait by the phone and wonder with my entire being if you will ever show. I don't want to be stuck on the outside, battering myself against a fortress you deny existing even as you add the bricks.

I don't want my heart broken by you again. But that doesn't make me want you any less.

I take faith and pride in the cycles we have broken and created anew, but I worry that would crumble under the weight of more. I worry we would crumble under the weight, again.

I worry that there's truly no way to know besides finding out. And I carry far too much fear to take that step myself

#writing #queer #words #relationships #ex

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exploringme2022 · 1 year ago

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I remember after his house inauguration he started behaving distant and he was ready to give me breakup because any reason, and when I came to Bangalore, I felt like we fought massively on some topic and I feel like it was intentional so that i will leave Bangalore and to the fact he didn't even stop me to go, he said okay go, if he loved me he could have stopped me or make some efforts but no, as he got to know she is single and i showing interest in him he started cheating on me on his mind, and again i ignored he said I want to talk her related to arnav's teeth but then he talk to her for 2-3 hours and in balcony closed door laughing and all, I was waiting for him on stairs pretending I was upset but he didn't even come once, and i ignored it , and you know the rest....

I accept good or bad things both, but I can see the clear picture now, i hate and feel disgusted by this men, he is and he never was a trustworthy, he just portrayed himself a good person but he is not, no one can be seem so perfect but full of selfishness, he is too proud on himself, he has so much attitude for no reason for no worth to be Frank, he is the biggest liar of all time, he is psychological liar and narcissistic, he has narcissistic person, I gave him so much love and care and everything but sad he never felt that he always wanted all those things from her, go find with her i no longer care about it, i no longer want to go back to him or meet him or even talk to him or let him be part of my life until or unless he stopped completely affecting me....I was thinking he did so much for me then her but he said from himself he did so much for her than me and earlier I was denying it now i accept it.... because it was not my fault it was his ....

If I ever talk to him or meet him just as my class mate nothing else...i will not treat him as my ex , just a stranger classmate nothing else, i no longer want to discuss what moments and memories we spent together, because it was completely meaning less and one sided I feel like...and i will not talk to him first and i no longer want to talk to him until he knows my value and respect me and treat me with dignity , I will no longer hear a single bad word about me or anything bad at all....that girl knows her value i should learn from her whatever she has or doesn't...she knows her value ...for ex she ignored him for more than 10days just to ignore her call and didn't accept his insta request ....she knows her worth and value ...

And then a girl like me should not even she him in eyes and doesn't even talk to her ...my standards in person is higher than them..they should not be part of my circle,...i don't even talk to such type of people in my own city why I am dealing with this kind in Bangalore....

Trust me i used to think when I was with i lowered my standards and both of them hold the same standards thats why they have whatever they have, standards means not how they look or financially but by mentality their standards is very low , their mentality is cheap and disgusting, i never dealt such kind of people before, i used to think why I was dealing with such cheap mentality person even in starting who talk cheap and used to make me feel cheap and uncomfortable, but then i felt i had to be with him because he touched me inappropriately and saw me, and this is one of the biggest mistake i have done, i should have cut strings with him when he touched me without my permission and i felt disgusting.

I no longer feel anything for him or attracted towards him , I never was , i didn't even remember his face

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gwenthebard · 4 months ago

Text

Also ive never really liked the "I dont want to read a 200 page rulebook" argument because like...

Thats not the rulebook you read?

Usually in my experience a 400 page rpg will be easy to learn as a 100 page one. Why? Because most of those pages arent rules

The average large "all in one" RPG core will be:

-A lot of "this is my first rpg" "history of the game and vibe" stuff thats more optional reading

-pages of lore. Can be intimidating, but most people will need to read like...10 pages total? Therell be a few pages of general information, a few pages of specific information that are applicable to the game. I find it hard to get new players to read even that at first, and most still learn the lore and get into it, so optional for learning if the gm explains some stuff as it comes up

-rules and character creation. I think the most I usually see for this is like, 10 pages of genuine rules and character creation depends more on how thoroughly its explained than anything

-about one-third to half the book will be gm information and stuff about running the game you will not need to touch as a player

From PBTA to Pathfinder to cyberpunk to call of cthulhu to everything else, this is how the layout generally is. Maybe 20-30 pages total of required reading before session 0. The difference between a 100 pages rpg and a 400 page one more often than not?

Options

A longer rpg likely has more character creation and gm options to play around with. The pbta game might have 30 pages of playbooks or archetypes, owod will have a 100 pages of powers, pathfinder of feats, a lot of games will have a ton of advantages or disadvantages like this, but mostly? Most of that information isnt going to be in depth reading. Read the paragraph describing a playbook then skip 3 pages to the next, read the few sentences describing what a type of power is based around, read the name of the feat or advantage or look at it on the chart listing them

YOU DO NOT NEED TO READ A CORE RULEBOOK LIKE A NOVEL: will reading it front to back give you a better understanding and more ideas? Yeah probably. Do you need to? Not really

If you know you want to play a sorcerer your first game, read the basic rules, character creation, sorcerer, and magic. The fun part? You can choose to ONLY look at the sorcerer stuff dealing with level 1 characters. You dont need to know what a rank 5 spell options you have, what you get at level 17, if you dont feel like it there is like 2 pages worth of information on the sorrcerer class you need to know in Pathfinder at level 1, and there are example level 1 options picked out if you want

If youre in a game picking advantages and feats? Read the names and skills attached. Most rpgs with pages of advantage options have a chart that gives the name, related skill, and a sentence about what it does. Read that. If you know youre playing a sorcerer the feat for two handed weapons isnt something you need to read, and if youre a barbarian you dont need the one that makes spells reach farther

Like Im begging yall to learn the rules, but also keep in mind you dont need to read these books like novels if you dont want to. The games ive had a hardest time learning were where there were a ton of different conditions or effects with paragraph descriptions detailing them, and thats because theyre something everyone deals with often interact with eachother

For most situations? 100 page rpg or 400, you have 20-30 pages of required reading, you can knock it out in an hour or less probably, and then youre free to start building your character and learning what they specifically do

As someone who is two of those things, the assertion that femmes, POC and queer people will be gatekept from games via the expectation that they make an effort to learn the rules is extremely infantilising. There have historically been unfair barriers placed in front of those people within the TTRPG hobby as a whole, including a culture that has been casually sexist, racist and queerphobic which I feel is still an ongoing issue even though things are slowly getting better, but to claim that expecting people to make an effort to learn the rules is in any way gatekeeping is bizarre. To conflate asking people to learn the rules with actual gatekeeping diminishes actual barriers to entry in this hobby while also being super infantilising.

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dreamescapeswriting · 3 years ago

Text

Something Casual ~ HHJ [Request]

WORD COUNT: 2.2K

GENRE: Non!Idol Au, friends to lovers, angst, fluffy ending attempt at humour,

PAIRING: Hyunjin x reader

A/N: I didn’t make it smut, I hope that thats okay

There was a reason everyone said that friends with benefits or casual sex with friends were a bad idea. It always ended in disaster, there was never a single good thing to come out of having fun sex with friends. But that was the thing, you and Hyunjin were different. When you began sleeping together last year the two of you decided then and there that it was never going to amount to anything else. You just needed sex in a casual manner, Hyunjin needed stress relief and you needed sex. Everyone had their needs and not everyone you came across in life could meet them.

The one thing you both had in common was that neither of you wanted a serious relationship. You didn't have the best track record with relationships and just needed something to satisfy you for a while and that was nice...While it lasted.

As time passed and a year went by you began to realize sex wasn't just what you wanted from Hyunjin anymore or anyone for that matter. You wanted something more meaningful, for someone to want to be with you for something other than sex. You wanted to be the first thing someone thought about when they woke up and right before they slept. That person for you was Hyunjin but you knew he didn't want you that way and you were going to have to end things sooner or later but you fooled yourself. Believing that if you kept sleeping with him that he would somehow grow attached to you and want something more. That never happened.

Hyunjin believed that you still wanted nothing more than sex from him so that was all he was ever willing to do with you. Even if, deep inside, he needed more from you, sex was the one thing keeping you around.

"I'm literally around the corner, chill." Hyunjin breathed down the phone to his roommate Jisung who had been begged for food for the last four hours.

"Did you get stuck at Y/n's place? What took you so long?!" Hyunjin knew why Jisung was snapping so much, he was hungover and in desperate need of his favourite fast food.

"There was a line, no I wasn't with Y/n she's busy," He laughed walking down the street towards their shared apartment when he thought he saw you inside of a restaurant.

"Busy doing what?" Jisung questioned but Hyunjin didn't say anything as he looked at you. Head thrown back as you laughed at something someone was saying to you. Hyunjin moved so he could see who you were sitting with at the table, you never laughed like that at something anyone else that he knew of.

"Hey! That's so not fair, I didn't fall...I-I stumbled a little," You whined at your date who shook his head at you,

"You stumbled a little...Into a bush?" Hiding your face in your hands you couldn't believe he was bringing it up. Only that morning you had gone for a walk with one another around the Han River and you had tripped into one of the bushes, scraping yourself up pretty badly.

"It's not my fault, I trip over my own feet." You reminded him as you shook your head. Chan was a great guy, you'd met him when you were out looking for a Birthday present for Hyunjin and he just asked you out. You figured there was no harm in going out on one date, if it did or didn't work out it wouldn't matter.

The moment Hyunjin saw you with another man his dropped to his stomach. Sitting there with someone that wasn't him and you looked as though you were genuinely having a nice time.

Before he could even register what was happening Hyunjin was storming into the restaurant and over to your table.

"Hyunjin?" You stood up suddenly, feeling as though you'd been caught doing something your parents would disapprove of.

"What are you doing here?" You whispered looking at him and forgetting that Chan was even sitting there in front of you. Confused as to who the man was interrupting you both.

"What are You doing here? Who is this?!" The anger dripped from his words as he looked Chan up and down and then back to looking at you.

"Chan, he's my date...Hyunjin-"

"Date?! I thought you didn't date?" Heads were beginning to turn around and look at your table, even though it was still quite early in the day there were enough people to make you feel embarrassed.

"Hyunjin can we talk about this later?" You begged as Chan got up to introduce himself to Hyunjin, he said nothing as he stared at your date. Wondering what he had that Hyunjin seemed to lack.

"Later? You were going to go out with him and then come to me later?" He scoffed as he shook his head, finally losing the ability to keep his cool about everything.

"You told me you didn't date? Or is that just because it's me?" Chan looked at you and you sighed, dropping some money next to him and apologising over and over again.

"Who is this?" Chan asked as he looked at you, putting your hands on Hyunjin's arm to try and guide him out of the restaurant,

"The guy she's sleeping with, who are you!?" The moment the words left Hyunjin's mouth Chan backed down, his face running pale as he realised you were seeing someone else.

"You're cheating on him?" Chan questioned now making this all feel like some kind of interrogation.

"No, because we're not a couple." You hissed at Hyunjin who was beginning to cause a scene.

"So you just fuck each other?" Chan raised his eyebrow and you could already tell by his tone of voice that there wasn't going to be a second date between the two of you.

"Yes." He nodded his head before looking at Hyunjin and back at you.

"Maybe you should speak things out before you go on any dates with anyone else." Sighing you nodded your head and began to walk out of the restaurant with Hyunjin, ignoring the stares that you were gaining from those around you.

"Do you have any idea how awful that was?! Having all of those people stare at me?!" Standing by the Han River you stared at the back of Hyunjin's head, it was as if he didn't have a care in the world that he had just done all of that. That he'd just stormed over to you in the middle of a date and ruined everything.

"I thought you didn't date! I thought we were just going to fuck and I catch you out with another guy?!" Staring at him you could hear the hurt in his voice as he turned to look at you. Hyunjin was still imagining you with Chan all night, picture the things that you and he did together with someone else.

"Why do you care if I'm with another guy?! You just want to fuck me, that's all we ever fucking do!" You snapped back at him, following him down the small path beside the Han River, watching him as he shook his head.

"Because that's all you want! You don't even know this Chan guy! He could be a murderer!" Rolling your eyes you couldn't believe that he was going to start bashing someone else just to make himself seem like the good guy in all of this,

"Hyunjin stop it,"

"No! He could be some total creep who will use you for sex. I was defending you." There was a point in your life when you would have loved Hyunjin to come and defend your honour but not now. Not when he was just doing it because he was going to lose someone to fuck, you wanted him to do it because he cared.

"I'm not yours to defend Hyunjin! We're not a couple! We're not together!" Hyunjin scoffed at you as he shook his head, if you were a couple he never would have done this. There was a part of him that wanted to stop yelling and talk calmly about everything but he was far too angry to even try.

"Do you know how long I waited for you to finally want me? Then you just wanted sex...So I did that...I tortured myself and agreed to it thinking that I could do it and I can't. I'm in love with you." Your voice broke as you said it out loud for the first time ever. Not that you wanted to but you knew that there was no coming back from this fight. If he was going to act like this when you went on a date you needed to end things sooner than later. It wasn't worth risking anymore fights over anything when you were in the bedroom. You both needed a clean break if you were ever going to be friends at the end of all of this.

"Y/n..." Hyunjin breathed as he attempted to tell you the truth but you shook your head. Standing at the fence that separated the River and the walkway.

"No! Now you decide that you only want me if someone else wants me?" Finally having enough of being painted as the bad guy in all of this Hyunjin lost it.

"I'm not the relationship type! You said that to me, Not the other way around! Don't you dare try and pin this on me!" You stared at him, his face red as he began to let tears run down his face.

"You never made an attempt to want me either," You mumbled as Hyunjin took a step back and laughed.

A small and awkward laugh, shaking his head as he thought back on everything you were both fighting about.

"Are we really fighting because we didn't say we wanted each other? That we're in love with one another..."

"I think so." You moaned looking at him as you began to laugh a little, it had to seem like one of the dumbest fights to everyone on the outside.

Taking your hand in his Hyunjin looked at you, the two of you had moved to go and sit on the grass and talk but neither of you said anything. You just sat there letting him hold your hand as you stared back up at him. You'd began eating the food that was originally for Jisung and just stared at one another or the sky until you dared to talk.

"I only went out with him to get my mind off you...I thought I could just do one date and realise that it wasn't what I wanted." Frowning Hyunjin looked up at you,

"You don't want to date?" He questioned but you nodded your head,

"I do...I just don't want to date anyone that isn't you." Humming at you Hyunjin pulled your face closer to his, running his thumb along your bottom lip.

"I think I can make that work." He breathed out as he kissed your lips softly, your arms wrapping around him as you began to melt against his body.

Everything was perfect until his phone began buzzing in his pocket over and over again.

"It's Jisung," He mumbled putting his phone to the side of him as he pulled you to sit on his lap. Looking up at you and smiling as he held your face in his hand.

"You're the last thing I think about before I sleep and the first thought I have when I wake up." Your body shivered as you looked down at him, almost melting at the words he used. There was no one on the planet that knew that was what you wanted in life.

"I love you...I'll say it every second of every day if I have to," You whispered bending down to kiss him again as he chuckled softly.

"Just enough so I don't go crazy and make a scene?" Nodding at him you fed him some more of the bagel from Jisung's food bag and smiled happily. This was one moment you were never going to forget, hangover food in the middle of a park with your boyfriend.

"Are you eating my food!?" Jisung's voice rang through the air and Hyunjin spun around to look for somewhere Jisung could be watching from. There he was sitting in his car by the side of the road with a bare of binoculars watching you.

"Are you creeping on us?!" You screamed back at him as he got out of the car and began storming over to you both. Grumbling something as he got closer to you and sat down beside Hyunjin.

"I don't want to hear about how you're in love, I want my hangover food." He grumbled as he began to eat the, now cold, food he had been waiting for all morning long.

"You don't wanna hear that we're not just having sex? That we're in a relationship?" You teased as Jisung stared at you and then at Hyunjin.

"The same rules apply, no funny business while in the apartment...It creeps me out," Giggling softly you hide your face in Hyunjin's neck as he agreed to Jisung's terms and conditions.

Tagline: @minholuvs @taestannie @sw33tnight @acciocriativity @mwitsmejk @taeechwitaa @justbangtanthingz @stillwithlix

#skz #skz x reader #skz x you #skz imagine #skz imagines #stray kids #stray kids x reader #stray kids imagine #stray kids imagines #stray kids x you #hyunjin #hwang hyunjin #hwang hyunjin x reader #hwang hyunjin imagine #hwang hyunjin imagines #hyunjin x reader #hyunjin imagine #hyunjin imagines

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violettelueur · 4 years ago

Text

ITADORI YUJI + FUSHIGURO MEGUMI + GOJO SATORU || TOUCH-STARVED

| featuring : itadori yuji + fushiguro megumi + gojo satoru from jujutsu kaisen

| warnings : grammar errors but other than that n/a

| form : headcanons

| published : 15 december

| request : can i have a black coffee; yuuji, megumi, and satoru with a fem so thats touch starved and practically bottles her emotions up and always not feeling theyre worth anyone's time due to the household that she grew up in? its perfectly fine to decline this as you please!

| barista’s notes : hi hi guys! barista violettelueur is back after disappearing for some good few hours ʕ*ﾉᴥﾉʔ please forgive me, but i fell asleep the minute i got back from school and woke up at 9pm ʕ ㅇ ᴥ ㅇʔ meaning i slept for a good 5 hours...hahaha oops. BUT i hope whoever requested this enjoys their cup of classic black coffee (jujutsu kaisen request!) and please come again soon when the cafe opens back up!

ITADORI YUJI:

Being the type not to be physically affectionate towards someone, you were used to bottling up your emotions and were pretty good at hiding them as well.

Itadori knew this but didn’t know the reason - but let it off - and allowed you to take some control of the pace of the relationship. But if needed he would instigate

the first move and hug and kiss you first - which does leave a warm fuzzy feeling in your stomach that you never really experience due to how you are raised in your family.

However, there will be times where you would feel extremely touch-starved to the point where even if you have to force yourself to hold his pinky finger, that would be enough for you - probably not, don’t lie.

There would be times where you would mentally beg Itadori to make the first move since you knew what he is like - but there are days where his mind chooses to be dense and here you are suffering.

So when the both of you are alone, you would just violently grab the back of his jacket before pulling him towards you to press your face upon his back.

You can’t lie, his scent was really calming you down and slowly the feeling of being touch-starved was wearing off slightly.

Itadori will be extremely surprised by what you have done but would allow himself to stay still since he wanted to relish this feeling of you making the first move for once.

Once he knows you feel comfortable, he would turn around much to your dismay and wrap his arms around you while one hand is used to press your face into his chest - because knowing you, you are probably blushing really bad right now.

However, Itadori is really happy that you are coming out of your shell and allowed yourself to express your love for him in a different way - he probably will have to wait a little longer, but this will do for now

FUSHIGURO MEGUMI:

Now this one is a little more complicated because Fushiguro probably knows about how your household treats you since you and him really confide in each other.

You both really didn’t have the best situations when you came to the topic of families so the fact that you two could somehow relate to it helped you two to trust each other.

Now the other issue - well not an issue - is that both of you weren’t really the type to be affectionate with each other.

You both knew you loved each other, it’s just physical touch wasn’t your love language - more of quality time and maybe some act of service.

However, Fushguro will try his best and will probably pat your head here and there as well pull your cheek to help your snap out of your thoughts or when you say something really stupid.

You would always try to do something physically affectionate but you always back down since you just don’t know what to do.

BUT that all changed once you one day were feeling really touch starved.

You don’t know why this happened, but you just did...like out of nowhere.

So once you and Fushiguro were both alone - probably in his dorm room or yours - you would randomly bury your face into his chest before shakily wrap your arms around his waist - surprising him completely at your sudden display of affection but he would stay still.

He will probably know that you are blushing and feeling really shy, so he will also envelop you in his arms to tell you that it was okay for him as well.

Since you have literally squished your face into his chest, you wouldn’t see the small smile that he has on his face when he looks down on you.

Man is in love~

GOJO SATORU:

No matter what, this man has no idea what the definition of ‘personal space’ is.

“Personal space? What’s that?”

So whenever and wherever you both, this man will have his hands somewhere on you no matter what - there is literally no escape from it.

It could either be him holding your hand randomly, him placing his head on top of yours (if you are shorter than him), him hugging you in front of his students or him bombarding you with kisses - there was no limit to how much affection he would get you.

And to be honest, it really did help with the physical affection aspect of your relationship since you didn’t really involve yourself in that part.

However, Gojo knew why you were somewhat shy or afraid to be physically affectionate, so he didn’t force you to act affectionate but rather encouraged you and let you go at your own pace.

Sometimes he would open his arms wide and just wait for you to just fall into his embrace allowing him to swing you back and forward.

Although you wouldn’t tell him this, when he does go on missions that makes him leave for days or maybe weeks on end, you really crave his physical attention and become extremely badly touch-starved since you were so used to his affection on a daily basis.

So much to his surprise, when you would run up to him and hug him really tight to the point where he can’t even pry your arms away if he wanted to.

You had basically trapped him as well as stuck yourself on him like glue - but does Gojo care? No~

He really is relishing this little physical affection of yours and just stands there savouring the homely warmth that you are giving him.

He is really enjoying this and will probably tease you later~

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beomglocks · 4 years ago

Text

what yeonjun is like as a boyfriend

warnings & other: no warnings except for falling in love with yeonjun, but is that so bad?, side note: no body asked for this but between college stress aka finals and daily life struggles this is the only thing i could manage to come up with so plz enjoy.

w/c: 2 more words and its 1K

jesus take the wheel

when you first meet him he’s flirting

biting his lips and licking them

raising his eyebrows and all like

????

calm down i don’t even know your name yet

very bold

so shameless when you first meet him

“you look like someone”

“oh really who?”

“my future partner ;)”

ngl you would be so put off by his confidence

but he knows when to tone it down and you’re like

“oh you’re actually tolerable!”

if youre shy then rip you

always trying to get you out of your comfort zone

probably does extra shit in public and you just have to laugh along nervously

then when yall are alone you scold him for embarrasing you and he’s like

“ok ok im sorry” *hug*

if youre confident like him youre both annoying

just kidding but thats real couple goals

everyone is jealous of yall

he’s so cocky

always showing you off

“hi everyone this is my partner!”

“yeonjun...we know...we’ve known ever since you introduced them 5 months ago”

thinks you’re the most beautiful human to ever grace the earth and it’s not even close

“seriously how did i end up with someone like you”

seems like the type of boyfriend to kiss the ground you walk on

*not to be confused with a simp*

yeonjun does not simp

he has morals

so you know how he tends to say “baby” a lot

yeah

thats his fav nickname for you and vise versa

omg he loves that nickname forreal

skinship

like i know i said beomgyu and skinship was a huge thing

but my god

yeonjun is on a whole other level

just comes up to you and annoys you with wanting to be close

hes so clingy

but will probrably pout and whine when youre clingy with him

“ahhh y/n you like me sooo much look at you clinging to me like this, leave me aloooooone”

obviously he doesnt mean it like cmon youre each others batteries

kissing you in public

im talking full on makeout sessions

“we’re in public...”

“ok and?”

literally just always all up on you

if youre someone who needs their space yall will CLASH

might even get into arguments because of this

serious arguments where you call him annoying

i feel like he will take it to heart if you call him that

nobody likes being called annoying :(

wont touch or talk to you for days

DAYS

thats dog years in your relationship

you have to apologize and really mean it

he’ll accept it if you kiss him

omg he’s so jealous

SO JEALOUS

doesn’t want people looking at you too long

dont try to make him jealous he will fight the other person

ok maybe just giving them the stank eye then he’ll pull up like

“hey im standing right here have some damn respect”

you guys definitely fight

A L O T

sometimes over petty shit but sometimes it gets serious

always threatning to break up but never doing it

you both know you’re bluffing but it still hurts everytime

but your relationship is strong

i feel like yeonjun wouldnt get into a relationship if he knew he wouldnt have a strong connection with the person

he values communication

tell him how you feel

he’ll always listen

if he’s feeling down you better buy him his favorite foods and run your hands through his hair ok!

speaking of food

best food runs

like will just randomly be like

“hey wanna go to this one place with me?”

and it’s like 2am

but he insists the food is worth it

best dates too

either a restaurant date

(doesnt have to be expensive, just gotta have good food)

or he cooks for the both of you

he cooks surprisingly good????

you’re like there’s no way you made this

he’s like damn you hate me that much

but no like actually can cook but he’s clumsy you know

you gotta be monitering him

which he doesnt mind, he likes having your presence in the kitchen with him

PLEASE i feel like he doesn’t like being alone when he’s doing everyday tasks idk

like if he’s brushing his teeth or if you’re brushing your teeth

he’s right there back hugging you ugh

the type to walk on the side of the sidewalk where cars are closer to <3

if you’re younger than him he kinda has a superiority complex

not in a condescending way

he just tends to baby you more

if you’re older he still tries to act older in some ways

“yeonjun im going to the grocery store!”

“actually i made that exact same grocery list and went 3 days ago”

“the only thing on the list was rice?”

but he likes being babied

coo at him and he’ll get shy and tell you to stop

meeting the other members isn’t too bad

“this is my significant other! arent they just so etheral?��

everyone nods because if they dont yeonjun will probably give them some choice words later

you gotta compliment him a lot

he thrives off compliments honestly

you: “you looked good in that one scene”

him: “yeah but i looked good in all the scenes though right?”

you CANNOT C A N N O T compliment anyone else

you: “soobi-”

him: glaring at you “what about him?”

just to mess with him youre like “soobin killed this scene too”

pouts and whines

“nooooo what do you mean he killed this scene?? i’m the scene too pay attention to me!”

studio sessions with him are a vibe

he likes rnb so yall would just be chilling on days where he doesnt have schedules.

plays his rnb playlist and yall just vibe out

youre both laying down on the studio couch with his head in your neck and he’s dozing off *broken heart emoji”

wait ok i know i’ve said this before but

he’s the type to tease you during arguments

“you wanna kiss me so bad”

and when you do he’s all smug about it

“my baby just can’t stay mad at me for long huh”

your friends think he’s hot

they probably think he’s way too good looking to be dating you

so you doubt yourself

but he’s like nah our looks are on par that’s why we’re perfect together fuck them

always wants you to watch him dance

during practice or not, he wants you there

after hours at the practice room is just him playing some random song and freestyling

but you love it because he looks so happy and free

probably does some cheesy shit like ask you to dance with him

or if you’re sitting down on your phone he’ll come up to you dancing just to bother you then just laugh

he’s the best boyfriend

idk

#choi yeonjun #yeonjun #yeonjun imagines #fluff #yeonjun reactions #yeonjun drabbles #yeonjun drabble #yeonjun fluff #txt imagines #drabble #tomorrow x together imagines #txt headcannons #yeonjun headcannons #txt reactions #txt scenarios #yeonjun timestamps #yeonjun fic #yeonjun x reader

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ruvatia · 3 years ago

Note

Sorry if this is a bit much with everything going on, but could I request a scenario where the Paladins + Matt & Lotor have a black s/o and they’re scared abt everything that’s happening in their country and are sad that racial injustice is happening? I’ve been rlly worried the past few days, but if this is smth too uncomfy I understand ;w; Thank you 💖💖💖

This got really long, I apologize but I turned it into half-headcanons with just the main paladins-- i apologize for not doing all the characters you’ve mentioned, but I don’t think they would fit all in a single post anyways www

On another note I hope you and every other reader take good care of their mental health; it’s important to be aware of what’s going on but it’s also important to be in the right mindspace to be able to tackle everything that’s being shared. It’s pain that’s been boiling for a very long time and there is absolutely no shame in taking some downtime to recover before heading back into current issues.

SHIRO:

If you were saddened, Shiro would suggest that maybe you switch to something else; if there was something that he knows will distract you and temporarily have you be a little more at ease, he’d do that!

But also maybe add a little twist-- extra soft blankets (fresh out of the oven! Screw the bills you’re worth it), extra cheese on your favorite dish, whatever it is that can make your smile a little wider, bigger or brighter just let him know!

Would give you hugs if you asked, but usually Shiro pets your head and brushes your cheek for comfort

He also does this when he wants to ask something of you, but thats another story

Why the TV was still on was a mystery to you, you’d stopped listening a long time ago. Your partner besides you noticed, and you felt the hand around your shoulder tighten his grip a little, bringing you out of your thoughts.

“Hey, maybe we should watch something else?” he asked softly, brushing your cheek with his hand. “I can’t really listen to this anymore.”

“Yeah… Sure.” you replied, though it felt like an automated response more than your actual opinion.

“Okay, I’ll switch to that weird show Pidge recorded the other day, we agreed to watch it, right?” he replied, quickly grabbing the remote to change the program.

The first episode started playing, but the moment that it did, you felt cold as Shiro left your side.

“Where are you going?” you asked, your interlaced fingers the only thing keeping him close.

“Ah, I thought I’d make us something. We both kinda skipped dinner….”

He’d thought about putting something together that you’d like, maybe order dessert to surprise you but seeing the look on your face, leaving your side was the hardest thing to do right now.

So he gave in, and your both fell asleep until the doorbell rang with your delivery.

KEITH:

I have this headcanon that Keith isn’t very good with physical touch but after the end of voltron and after enough time of humanitarian relief, he learns how important it is for someone that’s in a specific state of mind

So the best he has to offer when his words fail is physical touch

Over your time together he’s learned what you need depending on your mood, and it helped him out lots when you were more vocal about it-- if anything he liked it when you asked for things that he could easily deliver, he’d do anything to see you smile

A hand came over your phone screen, Keith’s fingers lacing into yours and making you drop the device onto the crevices of the sofa.

“Why did you--”

“You’ve been staring at that thing for the past hour, biting at your nails.” he said in a worried tone. “That’s enough. We’re going to bed.”

“But it’s just--”

“We’re going to bed.” he repeated in a harsher tone, lifting you off your seat.

Keith sat down onto the bed first, pulling you into him. You both fell onto the bed, Keith quickly pulling the covers over your shoulders before his arms came around you.

“My alarm is my phone.”

“That’s nice, but we both know we have nothing to do tomorrow.” he replied right away, making you chuckle.

“Keith…” you called, your hands sneaking up to his face.

You brushed away some of his hair from his face as he gave you a complicated expression, unable to reflect the small smile you wore. He knew things were shit outside, that being apart from your family and other loved ones was a toll on both you and that lately negative thoughts have plagued you more often than not but Keith, despite his good intention was still somewhat of an awkward man.

“Thank you.”

He kissed you in reply and you both left it at that, glad that he had someone like you to meet him halfway.

LANCE:

Lots of hugs the moment he feels something is off with you

Will be a brat™ for the sole purpose of distracting you, bET

I feel like post-series Lance tries his best to be as observant as Allura and tries to understand others better-- but it didn't take a genius or incredible empath to know why your eyes looked like they were about to overflow at the sight of the news.

I’d like to think that Lance, with a big connected family is one of the paladins that very easily gets what you’re going through, wouldn’t be surprised he’s been called one or two things in his past either

That being said it doesn’t mean that he completely understands your personalized struggles with racial injustices that you encounter everyday; as another minority himself + coming from a culture and upbringing that might be different than yours, its a very different experience.

Memories flooded as the news anchor spoke about “lootings” and as you scrolled down your feed to see feeble attempts at sympathy from local peacekeepers. You sigh and retweet another thread, only to find something equally as shocking right after. You stopped commenting in quote retweets a while ago, you felt like you were constantly repeating that none of this was okay and that a reform was desperately needed. Rather than typing out your thoughts you typed out your name, address and email over and over again, signing one petition after the other.

Hearing sigh after sigh, Lance eventually put an arm around your shoulder. He startled you, but his soft voice made both your shoulders and your guard lower.

“Hey, do you want to make a midnight snack with me? I’m getting kinda hungry.”

“What about that new rule we were talking about? Not eating 4 hours before we went to bed?”

“Every diet has one or two cheat days, don’t they?” he replied, kissing one of your eyelids. “Come on, I’m sure your neck is sore from being like that for so long.”

In the end you both made some soul-food until a food-coma knocked you out until tomorrow. In the morning, you realized that Lance must’ve woken up in the middle of the night because you remember cuddling on the couch, and yet you’re waking up on the bed. Of course, still in his arms.

HUNK:

Having a sensible heart, I feel like both you and hunk would struggle a little about maintaining a healthy distance with current events.

Though overtime he would understand that keeping in touch with everything that’s going on is important, but not at the sake of burning out

His best bet, to him, to pull you out of a such a dark space is with comfort food

“Ok ppl feel like they want to eat a horse but they actually cant when they’re in that mind space Hunk, let’s make something sweet and small; something direct and straight to the point! Let’s add smiley faces on it!”

Your turned down the volume from the news, let your head fall backwards and brought up your forearm over your closed eyes. It felt warm and made it you realize that you had probably been staring very intensely at the screen as a wave of comfort hit your eyes the moment they were drowned in darkness. Letting out a deep breath, you stilled and let yourself bask in your thoughts until a familiar voice brought you back.

“Maybe a little bit more sugar? No, then it would be disbalanced. The base is already so sweet-- Ah, I have to take the cupcakes out or else they might get burned!”

You felt a smile grow on your lips, making you ignore the horrid news being broadcasted to turn to your partner that as usual, seemed to juggle ten thousand things to create a whole meal.

“What’s going on over here?” you asked, leaning over the counter to note that one of your favorite dishes was made and machines that were mostly used for baking had been brought out.

“Oh you know, just a little pick me up for my most favorite person ever.” he shrugged, but a smile soon came to his face. His hands were full but he leaned over, his lips meeting your cheek. “Things outside are a little dark, so I thought we could both use a little something nice.”

He turned on the machine after dropping a drop of dye to make it your favorite color and within a few minutes the icing was finished. Hunk scooped up a small amount on his finger and brought it to his lips and nod.

“Wanna taste?” he asked you, his finger dipping into the icing.

A mischievous grin spread on your features as you took his wrist and let his finger fall on your tongue, the sweetness quickly spreading through your mouth. The yellow paladin shivered as you let his digit hang in your mouth for longer than necessary, letting out a satisfied hum when you returned it to him.

“Tastes perfect.”

PIDGE:

She knew what could be fixed, she knew how to fix it but this meant she was also aware of how long such a transition would take

I think Pidge would be similar to Shiro: whatever she remembers that helps you be at ease, she would defect to that in hopes to maybe distract you for a while.

I don’t think Pidge is a very touchy person either, so if she reaches out to you _physically_ in worry, it’s a very clear sign she’s serious/anxious

I feel like she would reach out in other ways and then if she knew you were in a specific state of mind where touch was not useful, or if she just also wanted to try things out lol

As you watched the twisted information that was being shared on screen, another message caught your attention. Rather than a small red icon in the corner, a small window appeared in the middle of your computer screen.

The video had stopped, every horrible gif about police brutality was paused and there was nothing else but the small window pidge had thrown onto your screen. You chuckled, and felt a pressure behind your working chair.

Another message popped up.

<You’ve been catching up with twitter for the past two hours. Surely you’re done now?>

A soft laugh came from you, making Pidge release a breath she didn’t know she was holding. You typed out an answer:

<Okay, but half of them are just cat videos and the other half are just retweets of said videos.>

You both laughed, before Pidge turned around and tapped your shoulder. She let her hand float in the air, yours coming to join it as a soon as your turned her way.

“Wanna take a nap?” she asked, letting her head fall onto your shoulder. “I had Chip make some hot chocolate, Hunk style.”

You squeezed her hand, putting your computer on sleep mode.

“Yeah, that sounds nice.”

#voltron writings #shiro x reader #takashi shirogane x reader #keith x reader #keith kogane x reader #lance x reader #lance mcclain x reader #hunk x reader #hunk garett x reader #pidge x reader #katie holt x reader #for context this was requested around june 2020 #its a year late and thata my fault wjdjan

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moonlit-imagines · 4 years ago

Text

Keep Your Cool

Charles Xavier x student!reader (platonic)

warnings: anxiety/panic attacks

a/n: ty anon, you’re so sweet! did do a few minor changes that would keep charles true to his character but thats about it!!

prompt: anonymous: “Hi! I’m so glad your back and I hope you’ve had a great break! Can I request a Charles Xavier x student!Reader (platonic)

Charles meets this new troubled mutant teen with ice powers. They’re totally new to the school and isn’t so happy about being there. They are always pretty talkative or more like nervous chattering and isn’t doing what they’re supposed to on lessons like being absent, sleeping or talking which leads to them being sent to Charles office a lot. This time Charles can’t help but snap at them for not taking things seriously and he accidentally triggers a little panic attack which Charles notice and he tries his best to help them calm down. Later on they tell him about them having bad anxiety. He feels really bad for not noticing and tries to help the reader the best he can. A little angsty fluff?

This type of anxiety isn’t really represented that much and I think it would be good for people to know that you don’t have to be extremely introverted to have anxiety. BUT if you don’t feel like writing this I support that. I wouldn’t want you to do something you don’t wanna do. Sending all my love!😘 also don’t be shy if you wanna change something!”

“Come in!” Professor Xavier announced from behind his desk after hearing a pound on the door. Lo and behold, it was you who walked through the door. “Mx. l/n, what a surprise,” he sarcastically remarked, “what seems to be the trouble this time?”

“Well, you see, Prof,” you began while pulling up a chair and ignoring the disappointed expression on Charles’ face, “I was just so, so nervous about finals that I was tossing and turning the whole night, you know? So I got like, zero sleep, no biggie.” The Professor intently listened with his elbows propped onto the oak finished desk, fingers pressed together. “A kid needs their sleep, and how could I get any if I was like, super focused on finals? I think I should be rewarded for how dedicated I am, just saying.”

“Go on...” Charles could feel your emotions through your presence, there was a suppression of emotions from within you, but oddly enough, your mutation had been a huge help at hiding things from nosy telepaths. Seriously, you thought the ice was cool, but hiding your feelings and thoughts from someone as powerful as that was next level. It did have some downsides, though.

“Right, so,” you shifted to an improper posture and scratched the crown of your head, “I actually took a little catnap myself ‘while the lesson was in progress.’” Your air quotes were a direct mockery of your teacher, which only irked the headmaster a bit more that he already was now that he’d visited with you three times this week.

“You do realize that finals aren’t for another four months, y/n?” Professor Xavier pointed out a fact that you were well aware of, but the excuse was worth a shot.

“Can never be too prepared.” You shrugged, signifying your absolute carelessness for being a deviant student in a school that did nothing but accommodate for all your needs...well, almost all of them.

“Enough is enough, y/n!” Charles snapped, rubbing his fingers along his temples as he tried to bare with this situation that made him think his mind was playing tricks on him. Were his problems replaying? “I am growing tired of your excuses, this school was an opportunity for you and you’re so close to blowing it for yourself. Is that what you want?” As the Professor continued his rant, the temperature felt as if it’d dropped a by a few degrees.

You sat in your seat, knees now pressed against your chest as you gave Charles a menacing stare, unable to speak or reply to the Professor. Ice was beginning to glaze over the windows of his office, freezing them shut. The door was a no-go as well, no one could move that handle if they tried.

“Y/N?” An expression of concern surfaced on Charles’ face as he sat up and tried to assess the situation. “Y/N, are you alright?” You shook your head in response and noticed some ice crystals forming on yourself, some had been weighing your eyelashes down while others were poking off your arms. Defense mechanism or just a “fun” little reaction to panic?

You were observing the effects of this panic attack only with a swivel of your eyes, not any more movement than that. The Professor was still asking you questions, but you’d tuned him out entirely. He could wait for you, he’d have to.

Despite the room now about twenty degrees cooler, you were feeling quite toasty. And you were thinking about five minutes into the future. What do I do when this is over? Do I have to explain myself? How the hell am I getting out of here? Should I stop? Can I stop? What if I—

You felt a hand carefully rest itself on your shoulder, you couldn’t help but jump. “Could you take a deep breath for me?” Charles asked with more compassion in his eyes, seems that he’s realized his mistake by now. You did happen to struggle with his request for a moment, but catching your breath did eventually happen. It did take a few extra tries to control, though. Soon, you were able to stop the spread of any more ice that could prove an inconvenience.

“Panic attack.” You admitted without being asked.

“I gathered.” Professor Xavier was stationary beside you, you may have frozen his chair to the floor. “I apologize for triggering one, I’m not used to being unable to sense someone’s emotions. I would have known were to stop or how to go about that much better if...”

“If it wasn’t for my mutation?” You finished the sentence he stopped because he thought it sounded selfish, like he was placing the blame on you.

“Precisely.” Charles took a deep breath and you decided that you should do the same. The two of you sat in silence as you surveyed all the exits and realized you were in a new predicament. “I don’t suppose you can unfreeze things, can you?”

“That I cannot.” You picked at some of the eyelash icicles and flicked them away. “Any students with a warmer mutation?” You suggested with an apologetic smile.

“I’ll call Doctor McCoy.” The Professor grabbed his wheels and realized that he would not be going anywhere anytime soon. “Y/N?”

“Professor?”

“Could you dial Dr. McCoy’s lab for me? Nine-six-three.” He instructed as you reached over the desk in compliance. The speaker rang a few times and another voice was finally heard on the other side.

“Dr. McCoy! Hi, it’s y/n, your favorite kid on campus,” you greeted, peering over to Charles who was silently urging you to get to the point, “yeah, me and the Prof seem to be in...a predicament. You got like, a heat lamp or something. Maybe Scott Summers? Cool, cool. Yeah, I did! Impressive, I know. Yeah, okay, see you in a few. Or like, an hour. But we will hear you from the other side of the door! Okie doke, bye!” By the time you’d finished your conversation, Charles couldn’t help but smirk at how you handled the after-effects of your situation.

“Well, it seems we have some free time,” Professor X. pointed out, “would you care to tell me a bit more about your anxiety? If you’re comfortable, that is...”

taglist: @locke-writes // @randomawesomeperson102 // @captainshazamerica // @ravenmoore14 // @thisetaernallove //

#charles xavier imagine #charles xavier #charles xavier x reader #professor x #professor x x reader #professor x imagine #xmen #xmen x reader #xmen imagine #marvel #marvel imagine #marvel x reader

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