#Still mourning Minfilia

[ahollowgrave]

a bit ago i told myself i wouldn't ship prudence and odette (idk why I guess I hate fun) but the truth is odette looooooooooooooooooooooooves a mean woman and prudence/odette feels like poking a bruise and i'm very into it !!!!

(also I think they look!!! so good together!!!) this is only in the WoL/Scion AU (and others) because 1) they have to be forced together to become anything they are not women who would willingly spend time with each other (at first)(But not in a like enemies to lovers kinda way you know??? they don't care enough to be enemies)(it's more like reluctant coworkers to ??????)

2) RP wise I always have more fun writing slow burn romances with other people than playing barbies on my own, but i have really been enjoying playing barbies on my own with these two.................

3) in RP Odette is dating Pru's boss and so Pru is like 'fuck this noise i'm out' she does not get close to her bosses lovers (except when she needs a ride thanks captain) and truly they just would not understand one another in this setting !!! (also pru is lowkey with ibant but if you say anything about this she will cause harm with great purpose)

[plounce]

was talking with oomves about my jerkwol (prior post about him), specifically how my only wolcred is that awful rabbit who thancred dumps for urianger, and a short summary of jerkwolcred+thanuri relationship history got erased so i ended up writing an extremely long summary. which is under the cut, along with a picture of jerkwol, the wol who all the scions justifiably don't want anything to do with. he finally has a name (lyelt)

btw trans woman urianger she/her pronouns. my city my rules my beautiful girl

in arr they were fwb, especially when thancred was veering into alcoholism in the patches. they weren’t especially emotionally close, but lyelt would say thancred was his favorite of the scions. they picked it back up in hvw patches - lyelt did mourn haurchefant bc “he was the ONLY ONE to always be there for me, to never criticize me, to always support me and only ever say nice things about me” (haurchefant was also at camp dragonhead most of the time.)

thancred was in a bad place. at his lowest. lyelt offered to pick up where they left off and thancred agreed. “finally, someone who doesn’t pity me, someone who doesn’t treat me like i’m about to fall apart, someone who doesn’t care about my feelings.” it’s not a bad time, they enjoy themselves, thancred gets a goal to pursue (making someone else feel good) and lyelt gets to be the center of attention with minimal expectation to reciprocate. although thancred stays awake for a long time after. leaves in the middle of the night. lyelt appreciates not having to deal with a morning after, so it’s never commented on. it’s easy (because thancred’s doing so bad).

they meet in the first. lyelt is happy to see him - thancred is mostly just focused on his emotional problems and doesn’t really expect to pick things back up again. during stb lyelt built up an image of thancred as "you'll put up with whatever and still stay standing like it's normal, you don't expect me to be faithful, you're handsome and witty, you’re not annoying and self-righteous, you put up a fight but never insist you're right.. maybe you could be the one?" (again, while thancred was not there) while thancred perceived them as “when we’re both in town and feel like it we’ll sleep together no-strings-attached. i respect you as someone incredibly powerful and important. i don’t expect much of you emotionally”. lyelt hits on him a couple times throughout il mheg when they’re alone, but thancred either doesn’t notice bc he’s so stressed or sort of brushes him off because it’s not the time.

post-titania, lyelt directly propositions thancred at the bookman’s shelves; thancred declines. he and urianger are almost maybe sort of kind of heading a certain direction, and while thancred’s still not sure if he’ll do anything about it (he doesn’t deserve her, after all, and in general he’s been keeping his heart locked up tight), he doesn’t want to hurt her feelings, and in any case he just really isn’t in the mood. lyelt is still in the post-battle high and thinks he deserves something besides sleeping on a musty old rug in a dilapidated old cottage so he does not take the rejection well. he eventually gets thancred to say it’s because of urianger, which lyelt really doesn’t take well. lyelt has not ever really cared for urianger - ugly, weird, not important or especially useful. (he doesn’t actually care that much about the WoDs stuff bc he never cared much for minfilia either, but this will come to change once he pulls it into his pile of reasons to hate urianger.) lyelt wasn’t impressed by urianger’s makeover earlier and just thinks she looks awkward and strange (urianger is also not out to anyone besides thancred and ryne, who are the ones she’s been in contact with. the twins catch on pretty fast (due to at least one of them being trans) and start using they/them without saying anything. y’shtola will later directly ask her about it and she will tell her. but other than that she is a very private person and i don’t know if she ever tells lyelt about it - it’s a very tender vulnerable thing, for her, and from a childhood of being bullied she knows to hold all soft personal things close to the heart. not that lyelt would like. use that against her, i don’t want to make transmisogyny a part of his character bc that’s unpleasant, but i just don’t think she’d ever give him the info because she already feels socially threatened by him).

lyelt and thancred get into an argument (see the dialogue in the linked post at the top) (i did try to start writing this scene for ffxivwrite but im lazy, you can see the wip here + here), and while thancred has had [negative sims interaction icon] about lyelt before, this is the first time he’s truly gotten angry with him. lyelt is just pushing all the buttons he can to get back at thancred for the “insult” - thancred’s failures, their past history, and most awfully insults towards urianger - until thancred just storms off because that’s what he does in emotional stress. he goes to urianger and rests his head against her shoulder for a moment. she wordlessly strokes his hair until he straightens up.

as shb continues, lyelt continues negging thancred, being “subtly” rude to urianger (you know the way), and touching him in front of her. she just sort of looks away uncomfortably. she was vaguely aware of them sleeping together in arr (moenbryda told her), and is like… “ah. okay. i should have expected. maybe if i had said anything… done anything… but i’m just a coward. and i’m difficult - i want too much from him. i’m strange.” etc. but she doesn’t say anything. she has no claim over him, anyway. nothing was ever said or done. and with all the things that may be hurtling towards them, maybe it’s for the best. maybe they would have regretted it - if ryne sacrifices herself - when everyone finds out about the secrets she’s keeping for the exarch… it’s for the best. it’s for the best. she closes up. of course thancred would want someone more confident, more attractive, more in-control - less needy, less emotionally desperate, less weird, not someone who has caused so much pain to him. she was foolish for imagining, thinking, hoping… she was living in a bubble that has been popped by the warrior of light. it’s for the best. she can only be herself, and keep on track for the most important thing of all - keeping the exarch’s plan intact. even if everyone hates her, even if everything she wants falls from her hands.

after the attack on lakeland, when they’re making preparations to go to amh araeng, after ryne has told thancred she wants to give him what he wants, when thancred is again at his lowest, he gives in to the pressure (and the rush of pressing on the bruise and splitting it open into a wound, of making the wrong decision, of just giving somebody what they want) and they fall into bed. it kinda sucks. thancred does not finish. lyelt is mad at him because he’s distracted. “are you thinking about urianger?” “no, no, i’m just…” “well focus on what’s happening in front of you instead. i’m right here. i’m here.” after, thancred leaves before lyelt’s asleep. he goes back to his rooms and bathes. of course lyelt left marks. bastard. and then he leaves the washroom and ryne is packing - one small pile of things to take, one big pile of things to leave behind, and of course caving to lyelt didn’t help. everything important to him is crumbling around him despite him, because of him.

amh araeng. miserable crew for a road trip. urianger doesn’t know that they slept together. thancred knows that lyelt would use it against her - or against him. lyelt is mad at thancred for being a disappointing lay, and is mad at urianger and ryne for being the reasons why. lyelt does not really talk to or think about ryne - he’s never cared for children, and he isn’t fond of needy people, and ryne is very needy (due to being a traumatized child.). so i think a lot of the conversations between the wol and ryne don’t happen because he just brushes her off and she’s very intimidated by him, because he’s so confident. he knows exactly what he’s for and what he wants. unlike her. he doesn’t care what other people think about him. he’s the exact opposite of her.

urianger does what she does in canon: urge the wol to go to thancred and be there for him. she’s trying to let go gracefully, quietly. lyelt doesn’t know what to make of it: is she trying to sabotage him? what is she plotting? but he wants to get away from having to deal with ryne, and would rather leave that to urianger. imagine all the scenes where thancred tries to share about his past with minfilia but the wol is either tapping his foot and looking at his watch or trying to feel him up (trying to drive the wedge further, even if he’s still pissed off). eventually thancred pushes him away and heads back to twine on his own, deeply uncomfortable. he feels awful all around, and again he wants to seek out urianger for comfort - but he betrayed her, and he doesn’t know what to do about her, and most of his mind is just a giant tangle about ryne and minfilia and not knowing what to do - so he just avoids her. lyelt gets back and hands the heart over to urianger with a bit of a catty comment that urianger isn’t sure what to do with. thancred sees them talking and is terrified that he told her they slept together.

thancred watches urianger bring the talos to life and feels that same warmth and affection try to swell up within him that he felt so many times in the bookman’s shelves - and then he sees ryne run away and he’s back to feeling like shit. he watches urianger go to her and speak with her and be the guardian she’s always deserved and it’s that love curdling into self-hatred and - and lyelt says something incredibly unhelpful and callous and kind of cruel, and that’s what makes thancred walk away without saying anything in this verse.

urianger bids them farewell, hoping ryne lives. thancred makes his last stand, not sure if he hopes he’ll die - it would make everything so much easier. lyelt gets ryne the rest of the way, but doesn’t go with her into “that white and soundless place.” she emerges herself, her spine straight, and she doesn’t look to lyelt for reassurance. urianger finds thancred out in the desert bleeding out. he says some mostly incoherent but incredibly romantic things to her. she heals him through tears as the other scions arrive and help her, and once he’s stable they haul him to safety. thancred accepts ryne unconditionally and gives her her name. it’s a massive swoop of relief. he starts to think that everything might be okay. maybe he can move past the worst of himself. urianger is full of joy, yet also relief - they’ll be okay without her, when they won’t want her anymore, when she’s revealed for what she is. lyelt is picking at his nails to the side.

back at the crystarium. thancred is trying to talk to urianger, but she keeps making excuses. his mood dampens - she knows. but he keeps trying. if only because she isn’t really talking to anyone right now. y’shtola definitely isn’t talking with her except in hushed, urgent tones. the twins are occupied with saving the world, because they’re good souls. urianger will talk with ryne, though. so thancred ends up sticking pretty close, if only because lyelt comes and tries to find him when he’s alone, but avoids him when he’s with ryne. ryne ends up as a buffer between a lot of the adults in her life. she tries to ask urianger what’s wrong, why she’s so sad, but urianger gently deflects. it’s not her responsibility. which is both true (and something ryne “hypersensitive to adult moods” waters especially needs to hear) and also unhelpful because urianger is deeply miserable.

onward to kholusia. things keep hurtling forward. lyelt is enjoying being the big hero, and thancred is enjoying being a father, but is still very nervous about the whole lyelt mess just lurking in the wings. urianger is walking to her doom (from her perspective). yshtola is keeping a suspicious eye on her. yshtola knows that there’s drama happening but is not especially interested in it. she knows urianger is privy to the exarch’s plan, and she also knows that lyelt is an ass (as ever). y’shtola tries to figure out what’s up with her, but in a very blunt way that does not agree well with urianger’s current emotional state, so they get nowhere.

mt gulg. things come crashing down. when lyelt wakes up back at the crystarium, he seizes upon urianger as the (only available) person to pin all the blame to, and he does it with relish. finally, a way to be justified in how sick he has grown of urianger ruining everything! the villain in his life, and he’s free to be angry! so he says a lot of really horrible, cruel stuff and urianger just takes it. there’s not much she hadn’t already thought herself. and it’s what she deserves. but soon enough y’shtola and thancred come into the room and y’shtola gets between them and argues back (as she has always desperately wished to - everyone is getting to live out their deepest thoughts) and thancred ushers urianger out of the room, but not before lyelt can yell out the secret (“i fucked him, you know! right in this bed! who do you think you are?” etc etc) (i don’t think i’m mean enough to write his lines very easily lmao). thancred winces, lurches, but keeps them moving. y’shtola stays to try and get lyelt’s head on straight (impossible - he storms out). thancred takes urianger to his and ryne’s rooms, and he and ryne do their best to comfort her and to tell her that lyelt was taking it too far and that she is beloved and not to blame, but they don’t really succeed beyond urianger nodding her head and trying to placate them and trying to stop crying, the same as in the other room. thancred does his best to keep his head but eventually he has to make himself leave with the excuse of getting something to eat because he’s so angry at lyelt for his cruelty, and at himself for being a weapon in lyelt’s arsenal against urianger, and for all his past stupid decisions. they don’t talk about the last thing lyelt said. ryne doesn’t know exactly what happened, but this is the moment where her feelings towards lyelt change from intimidation/awe to wariness/dislike.

urianger kneels in apology at the amaro landing. y’shtola tries to stop her. the rest of the scions are deeply uncomfortable. urianger pledges all she can do, and lyelt says something that drives in her guilt and that she owes him for his “forgiveness.” alisaie nearly says something, but they all know he needs to stay in control of himself right now. the sky pulsed and flashed during his outburst at urianger earlier - that’s why y’shtola and thancred came in.

the tempest. everyone does what they must, because interpersonal disputes aside, they have a greater purpose. lyelt mostly just doesn’t want to die and wants this shit out of him. (very little sympathy for emet-selch - finds the whole production boring and tiresome. but that’s not what this summary is about)

they return. thancred and urianger sit down and talk, and they manage to do it like mature adults. during that, thancred apologizes for sleeping with lyelt; urianger says there’s no need, it’s not like they made any promises to each other; “but i had, in my head. i wanted to.” they acknowledge their feelings for each other in relief and gladness. thancred assures urianger that even if he ever saw lyelt as a romantic prospect, he certainly hasn’t for a long time and especially not lately, and “why would i, when such a beautiful, kind, intriguing, intelligent–” “oh, cease such flattery–” “-- gorgeous, patient, strong, incredible woman somehow thinks i’m worth her time?” and in the end, the secrets they had worried over mean very little to each other, and it’s easy enough to fall together as they’ve wanted to for so long, as they thought they might.

eden plays out a bit differently. urianger gets invited along on the initial excursion as a way to get her out of the crystarium and away from lyelt. wol presence is minimal if not nonexistent. waters family light party, at least for the first part. thancred negs urianger way less in this verse - when someone is being genuinely intentionally unkind to someone, teasing becomes much less appealing. (thancred does seem to find it easier to be his better self when there is someone being his worst self nearby: see ran'jit)

lyelt becomes very frosty to both of them once it’s apparent they’ve gotten everything they wanted and are together. “well, whatever. thancred hasn’t been fun for a long time. he betrayed me how many times? and here he is, hanging around the biggest traitor. it’s like everyone’s forgotten what urianger has done. well, i haven’t. and i won’t. it was to me, after all.” lyelt continues to bully urianger, and she never really stands up for herself against him. she still feels guilty, and while she doesn’t believe (most of) what he says, it’s just easier to let it slide off her back and not provoke him further. she remembers how this all works. thancred just does his best to act as a shield between them, and he wishes that moenbryda was here.

but eventually, things return to normal. lyelt vaguely “apologizes” for acting as he did when he was under a lot of stress. and the scions make themselves keep working with the only person who can save this world and their home world.

[yzeltia]

FFXIVwrite2024 17. Sally

Featuring: @erickgage 's Erick Gage. Allusion to @driftward 's Zoisette Vauban Characters: Sally, U'rahn Nuhn, Violet Fisher, Thancred Waters, Alisaie Leveilleur, Alphinaud Leveilleur, Jullus pyr Norbanus, Estinien Wrymblood, Krile Baldesion, G'raha Tia, Y'shtola Rhul, Jannie Eyradoux Fortemps, Artriole Fortemps, Haurchefaunt Fortemps Rating: T Summary: The Scions and friends mourn the loss of one of their own. Notes: Used lines from Funeral Blues by W.H. Auden

U’rahn swallowed as he looked at the crowd out familiar, yet sad faces, adjusting his tie briefly before leaning into the podium checking in with Y’shtola as she tended to the one most aggrieved by the loss as she sat stunned.  Getting a nod that it was time, he cleared his throat and began. “Thank you all for coming today. We all loved Sally dearly. She was the most faithful of companions and a true Scion in her own right. I do not have the words to describe the loss we will feel in our lives without her, but I know we collectively have fond memories of her and invite those who have one they’d like to share to come up and take the stage.

Violet shifted, looking over her shoulders to see if anyone else would be brave enough to go first. “Oh swive me,” he muttered under her breath before standing and relieving U’rahn of the mic. “Sally was always dependable. She saw me through so many…many mistakes and at one time, saved me from ruining a good friendship…”

Violet stretched in the cramped hull of the ship, careful not to knock her hand against the metal interior with her bottle of ale. Across from her, Thancred nursed his own bottle, still shaken from the revelations of the Word of the Mother. This little excursion, Violet had thought, was a good means to get him to forget. At the very least he was in a safe controlled environment where he could get it out of his system.

Eyeing his goatee, she grunted then straddled his lap, tilting his chin up with a finger. “I really hate this thing. When are you going to shave it,” she asked with a smirk.

“Haven’t heard a complaint from a lady yet,” Thancred responded gruffly, wobbling his head as he tried to move from her finger.

“I’m a lady,” Violet said, raising her brow.

“Ne’er knew a lady to say ‘swiven’ was her favorite word,” Thancred growled.

“Word. Expletive. Adjective. Verb,” Violet listed.

Thancred jerked his head away then held Violet by the small of her back as he sat up. “A regular grammar dictionary are you now?”

Violet flushed, finding his head pressed against her breasts as he embraced her. They’d always exchanged innuendos, yet always as careful banter as he’d had eyes for only Minfilia…perhaps not eyes, but definitely his heart. Now she was gone and Violet even tipsy could sense the loneliness. Frowning, she stroked through his hair, pulling his head back a bit as she gazed down into his eyes.

Her heart raced a moment, their gaze locked. Shyly, she leaned forward, drawing her face in before being lurched off Thancred’s lap as they ran aground. “Swiven hells,” she huffed, getting up to go see what they’d found. Finding themselves running along a sandbar, she raked her hair back then focused on getting them back on course.

“Sorry,” Thancred mumbled from behind, leaning forward to make sure they were free of the obstacle.

“Don’t mention it. Ever,” Violet said, face still flushed. “Why don’t you get us some water? Maybe we talk about Minfilia and Lousioux and drown our sorrows in memory instead.”

Violet drummed her fingers on the side of the podium for a moment then shook her head. “Anyway. She was beautiful and she’ll be missed,” she said before returning to take a seat, Riol looking at her with his brow raised a moment before looking away immediately as she snapped her attention to him.

Alisaie came up next, Urianger behind her with his hand on her shoulder as she snuffled away. “Sally was…I didn’t even get to say goodbye…I…Urianger, please, the poem,” she squeaked, unable to prevent the tears from coming.

Urianger nodded then cleared his throat, “Stop all the chronometers, cut off the tomestones. Prevent the dog from barking with a juicy bone…

Alisaie crossed her arms as she pressed her cheek up against the porthole, watching outward into the empty nothingness of the sea. “Are we there yet?” she sighed. 

“Thou will be upon the shore again before thou knows it,” Urianger said, not looking up from his book.

“I’m bored though. There’s nothing to do in this cramped tin can,” she lamented, knocking her knuckles against the side.

“There is an endless expanse of sea just outside your window. A whole hidden world. Relax, and take it in,” Urianger responded, flipping a page.

Alisaie rolled her eyes and let her attention wander out into the empty expanse, though after a bit, she noticed that something was amiss with the veil-like light filtering down from the sea above. Squinting carefully, she began to notice a scalelike quality to veil. Her eyes widened, realizing it was a large school of fish swimming in perfect unison.

This didn’t go interrupted though. Soon a large maw appeared and scooped up the lot followed by a low song. Alisaie pressed her nose against the glass, hearing a melody all around them as two baby whales circled about their parents, scooping more of the fish veil as the rest of the school scattered. She watched in awe, the little family following alongside them. Perhaps it wasn’t so bad under the sea.

“...Pour away the ocean, and sweep up the wood; For nothing now can ever come to any good,” Urianger finished before taking a sobbing Alisaie back to her seat.

Alphinaud followed his sister, looking out at the crowd gravely. “I’m not sure what to say. I thought Sally would long be a beloved part of the Scions. I have never been found of the water, as many of you know, but Sally helped me overcome my fear of the swimming and so much more…”

Alphinaud hugged his knees, the Thavnair’s humidity getting to him. Jullus beside him had long discarded his coat into the bowls of their ship, leaning over the side now touching the still seawater as they floated through a wooded lagoon they surfaced in. Fireflies danced about them as Jullus’s hand reached for Alphinaud’s

“Sally sure found us the perfect spot. This place is almost like a dream,” Jullus breathed out before turning to the other.

Locusts cried while crickets creaked. Frogs sang to one another as catfish splashed around them. Their vessel seemed to slowly spin, making Alphinaud slightly dizzy. He leaned into Jullus who caught him then pressed their foreheads together, smiling softly before tilting his head to go for a kiss.

Alphinaud blushed as the memory ran across his mind, hand briefly coming up to touch his lips before being pushed aside by Estinien. “Sally helped me take on my greatest foe and brought me my greatest rewards,” he said into the mic as it squeaked out.

Estinien’s eyes widened as his prey came into view, the console beeping as the creature came closer. “By the Fury, Sally, there she is. The great squid of the Indigo Deep. Tonight we dine like the saints of eld,” he said before getting his harpoon ready.

“No one believes you’ve taken on and fried a giant squid,” Krile interrupted from the audience, giving G’raha tissues as he wept. “Oh, Raha. You didn’t even know Sally.”

“I knew OF her though! So many adventures. Every one meticulously logged so that I felt as if I was there myself,” G’raha blubbered. 

“Prayers…Sorrows…,” Krile sighed, patting his back.

“I have a memory,” Jannie chimed in, cradling Haurchefant in her arms as he slept. She stood, taking the podium as Estinien grumpily stepped down. “Sally made sure that Arteriole was there in time for Haurchefaunt’s birth.”

Jannie cried out as she felt another contraction ring through her body. She cursed Rahn for convincing her that the relaxing sea air of Costa del Sol would do her some good before the pregnancy…but also was relieved to have him around as he fetched her water. Grateful that he took his doula training very seriously in preparation for his own daughters. Still, her husband hadn’t come with them, instead seeing to business in Limsa Lominsa in hopes of fostering further trade between the seaside nation and Isghard. For that, she felt might not forgive him.

“Rahn! I swear if Arty misses his son's birth I will swiven let him throw you into the deepest dungeon of the Vault where even Aymeric will not find you,” she hissed before letting out an appreciated whine as he laid out a cold cloth over her head.

“Okay okay! Let it all out. I am used to the verbal abuse of the huntresses by now,” U’rahn assured her.

“Yeah! Let Rahn have it,” Violet cheered, keeping her distance from the scene.

“I promise Arty is coming. Sally will see him here! In the meantime, big breaths and squeeze me. Don’t worry, you can’t break me!”

“I’m sure going to try,” Jannie hissed, taking his hand and squeezing it with all her might.

“Jannie! Jannie my love! I’ve come with a courjen!” Arteriole’s voice called out from across the beach, looking absolutely winded as he did his best to run through the sand, their baby bag tucked under his arm while a little lalafell in a lab coat followed.

Jannie let out a sigh, looking out to Sally in the distance and smiling before closing her eyes, relieved and ready to begin to bring their son into the world.

“If it wasn’t for Sally, you wouldn’t have ever gotten to meet your Uncle Rahn,” Jannie cooed to Haurchefant as he stirred awake, U’rahn swallowing behind her as she went to take a seat.

“Ah. Well, if that’s everyone…We will now let her sink to the depths of the aquarium where she can live out her days among us and in the ocean waters she loved so much. For the last time ladies and gentlemen: Dive Sally, Dive,” U’rahn said solemnly, getting a wail of grief from the front row as the urn plunged into the water.

In the back a door swung open, Erick gage scanning the crowd then up at the stage. “What is wrong with all of you? This is a place of business!! Who throws a funeral for a submarine!?"

[coffee--fiend]

The Star and the Storm

There was something so isolating about the stars that slept above Coerthas. The silent beacons flickered steadily, far away from the war-torn lands and innumerous lost souls wandering below, impassive observers to the countless tragedies ravaging the land.

‘An unfortunate trend this world is cursed to repeat, it would seem..’ Adhara’s ears fell as he sighed. Looking up at the mosaic of lights dancing above brought comfort, though. ‘So long as the stars shone above there would be a path forward..’ Or so he told himself. Even the heavens themselves hadn’t walked away from the last decade without their fair share of scars, as Menphina could attest. To think it could happen to the Lover, forever left to mourn her fallen hound below like any other mortal. It would be poetic if it wasn’t so disquieting. Would the stars also wink out in this lifetime? Would they too betray the steady promises of the past? He tore his eyes away from the sky with no small bit of effort. ‘It wouldn’t bode well to have an episode here, so close to the others. It’s not..’ His brow furrowed as he cut that thought off before it could be completed. This was his lot in life, regardless of how poorly fate had chosen. He would shame the brave souls who came before him if he broke here.

He turned his head just slightly enough to watch the others without giving away that he was paying them any attention. Noxis leaned carelessly against a scraggly tree, feet crossed over one another as he played a tune on the odd instrument he had called a harmonica. Alphinaud seemed to be intrigued at its design, even if none of his questions were being answered by the man in question. Fortunately for the boy, Gliese appeared to be filling him in on what details she knew after countless nights arguing with the viera to knock it off and choose a less offensive instrument. He exhaled, a small smile ghosting across his face as he watched their antics. To her credit, it was proof that the girl had been listening. Right now the last thing he wished to handle was their concern, not with his walls so close to tumbling down. His face fell as he once again found himself turning to the star’s silent regard in hope of an answer he knew did not exist.

Adhara had been named the Warrior of Light after the battle against the Ultima weapon, yet the title felt larger than he could ever live up to. He was just one man, and not even a particularly skilled one: mortal as any other, yet for reasons beyond his comprehension, it seemed the world looked to him as if he held all their answers, and all he could do in response was turn to the stars for the selfsame answers his betters believed him to have. He was a mere researcher, not some vaunted guardian of the star. He was, and would never be, someone special. That bloody mockery of a banquet was proof enough of his failures. He squeezed his eyes shut, dread washing over him at the mere thought of who was left behind. Minfilia, Thancred, Y’shtola, Papalymo, Yda.. Did they still draw breath? Were they rotting away in a dungeon somewhere within the belly of Ul’Dah, paying for his sins? The train of thought was interrupted when a warm gush of iron flooded his mouth. It would seem he had bitten his tongue as he mused yet again. Grimacing, he wiped his mouth with his sleeve and counted down from ten. ‘Best not render myself injured and a fool..’

When he opened his eyes, he was greeted with the sight of a snowflake drifting down in front of him. He watched it as it drifted, dancing in both the wind and the warm puffs of breath that came from him. A strange sense of melancholy washed over him as the snow drifted down in gentle flurries around him. Such a beautiful thing, yet so deadly. ‘They say that each and every snowflake is unique, born unlike any other. I wonder if the isolation hurts them too..’ Once more, he felt his ears fall alongside his spirits.

He wrapped his tail closer to himself, a weak mockery of comfort he was too cowardly to seek out. Comfort he knew he needed, yet.. was he really in a position to be so meek? Would that not only distress his companions further? He couldn’t afford to show such weakness, to lose his heart could very well mean he would be the reason the others fell. He stared blankly ahead as he considered his options, holding his arms close and saying nothing.

“Are you unwell, my lord?” Adhara jumped at the sudden voice, shaking a sizable amount of snow out from both his hair and tail at the motion. Arashi stared at him from behind that featureless helmet of hers, iron face forever clad in a grimace. The two simply looked at one another while his mind caught up to the moment, yet the moment it did he couldn’t help but sigh. How embarrassing. Of all his companions, she was easily the most stalwart. She was sure footed, confident in each and every action whether on the battlefield or off, and never so weak as to break down and sob. What he would give to share in that confidence, perhaps then he would finally be someone worth the titles heaped upon him.

The knight must have realized he was back in the present, as she cocked her head to the side and appeared to give him a once over. “It isn’t wise to linger so far from the fire, follow me.” She only motions at him, turning away to begin heading back to the now dim and empty campsite. He was unsure of how long he had been sitting there, gazing sightlessly at the falling snow, but clearly enough time had passed if the pile of snow atop his head was any indication. His joints popped in protest once he stood, adding even more evidence that he may not like the answer to that particular question. He fell into step aside her without comment, more than aware there was no defense to give for his actions. At least Arashi was kind enough to not call him out for the fool he apparently was.

He must have been getting distracted again, as the thud of wood dropping into the now roaring fire snapped him out of his reverie. He blinked at the flames as they danced wildly within their pit, shaking his head. In the fire light, he could make out that the knight appeared to still be watching him closely, guarding whatever thoughts and judgements she had deep within her psyche. His ears lowered slightly as a wave of shame washed over him.

“I suppose I just have a lot on my mind this evening, please forgive my carelessness. I can assure you it won’t happen again.” He sighs, looking at a collection of pebbles and twigs before him in favor of making eye contact with his companion. He only heard the sound of rustling armor in response. ‘Typical Arashi..’ he thought, with just the slightest inkling of frustration. ‘If I were even a fraction as calm and collected as she, perhaps the others would still be here. Perhaps Gliese and Alphinaud wouldn’t cry themselves to sleep at night.’ He dragged his claws through his tail, glaring hard at the ground beneath him. ‘Some Warrior of Light I turned out to be..’

“You shouldn’t blame yourself, you know.” His eyes widened when he heard Arashi speak up from her place poking at the fire. “A shield can only take so many blows before it breaks. Everything has its limits.” He looked up and noticed her gaze was set upon him now, a faint white glow shining out from the eye of her helmet not reflecting the blaze between them. “People.. warriors, are no different my lord.”

“I am no shield, though. Just some lost scholar playing at being a guardian. Regardless, I’m not bothered or blaming myself. I’m just.. thinking.” He huffed, resting his head on his knees and just staring ahead. He was not sure what exactly she meant by bringing up a shield, but he knew an effort to distract him from the truth when he heard it.

“Are you really any different, or is that merely your regrets speaking? Forgive me for my breach of station, but I am certain that in this you are gravely mistaken.” He simply sighed, lazily dragging his eyes to the knight sat across from him, before raising his hand in a non committal gesture.

“You know I don’t really care for that protocol nonsense in the first place.”

At that, he hears an amused huff from the knight. “Fair enough.” He hears her readjust herself, drawing his eyes to her once more, but what really catches his attention is her drawing the massive greatsword that lives on her shoulder and plunging it into the earth.

“Back when I first picked up this sword, my master at the time taught me that there are two types of warriors in this world: Those who save and those who slay.. those warriors who would become living shields and those who would rather become an animated sword. They might use the same tools, but their mindset is what determines who they will be with a blade in hand.” She grabbed the handle of her sword, drawing it from the dirt and holding it aloft so that Adhara could better examine it.

The massive blade was black as pitch, he had known that long before, yet looking at it bathed in the amber light against the backdrop of the snow gave it a new weight. It was steady and sure, and in an indescribable way, something about that felt.. almost aware. Of both what it was, and what it must do. A shiver raced down his back at the mere thought, and he looked back towards Arashi with no small bit of trepidation.

“My sword has seen endless battles in my hand, bathed in the blood of the guilty and innocent alike, without even a moment’s hesitation. It is the judge, jury, and executioner all at once. That is what it means to be a sword. A sword will never falter, she must always aim true or her mission will end in death, and the death of everyone she is fighting to protect.” She sheathes the large greatsword, looking back at Adhara in the dancing fire light once more. “You may fear that you too are a sword, Adhara, but you do not have that kind of edge. You can’t have that edge, not when you have ever been a protector at heart.”

He looks down at the ground once more, a series of doubts racing through his mind all at once. While he could admit that she was correct in his inability to be truly ruthless even when he ought to be, he still couldn’t quite accept this idea that he was some form of shield. He had only failed to protect his companions, time and time again: it was a miracle they had gone as far as they had with himself at the helm.

“If I am meant to be a shield, then I am a badly broken one.” He mumbled, picking up a pinecone and examining it in the light.

“My comrades- the other scions, that is, were captured and seemingly imprisoned or worse back in Ul’Dah. We don’t even know if they made it through the night of that damned banquet, all we know is that they stayed behind so that we could escape. Of everyone who fought that day, I am the only one to have returned.” He clenches the pinecone, crushing it with his fist.

“Had I stayed behind sooner, would they still be here? Would they be safe?” He tosses the broken pinecone into the fire and rests his head back on his knees.

“Had I broken, would they have lived?”

The two of them say nothing, for the space of a moment. The only sound between them being the soft crackling of the fire and whisper of the wind. A wolf’s mournful cry echoes somewhere to the south, lost to the blizzard.

“Is that not the price of war, though? You can’t save them all, regardless of how hard you try.” He looks back at the knight, about to refute her statement, when he sees that she is also staring hard at the burning pinecone within the flames. “They were shields too, and just like yourself, they had people they needed to protect or they couldn’t live with themselves. Can you truly look within yourself and say you would have done any different in their shoes?”

Adhara re-examines his companion in the fire light, seeing an entirely new side of this argument he had initially dismissed as ridiculous. Was it truly that simple? Could he really accept that there was no one person at fault for that bloodbath beyond their foe? He wanted to recoil at the mere suggestion, but to do so would be disingenuous to his friends’ memories. No, as much as it pained him to admit, Arashi could have a point here: Not that it would change the fact that he still failed, in the end. He sighs, looking back down at the pinecone as it crumbles into a pile of ash. “At least then, perhaps I could have done something useful.”

“They chose to stay behind so that you could live because your life meant something to them. Hell, you still mean something to them even if you hide behind this cowl of ignorance.. They look at you like you hung the stars themselves. Surely that is worth factoring into your assessment, my lord.” He looks back at his knight one last time, something warm briefly fluttering in his chest. Despite everything about it feeling like a mischaracterization of his situation, he couldn’t dismiss her out of hand. She had her point, although he had never even considered that she would pay enough attention to make it in the first place. He offered her a soft smile, ears flicking as he did. “You are kind to say such things, my friend.”

“I am no such thing, my lord. Just another knight offering a different perspective.” She sat back, crossing her arms and leaning against the same gnarled tree Noxis had been enjoying prior. “Regardless, this conversation has gone on long enough. It would seem we have attracted prying ears, after all.” She just barely nods her head behind him.

His eyes widen, and he snaps around just quickly enough to make out a spotted ear and a white braid speeding back inside their tent, followed by harsh whispering. He sighs. ‘Teenagers..’ Shaking his head, he looks back at his companion and offers her one last grin, this time truly genuine.

“Thank you.. I think I really needed that. Though, I still insist that you are kind; you can’t change my mind on that front. I’ll make a friend of you, just wait and see.” Although she is still wearing the same snarling helmet as before, he can feel her rolling her eyes at him.

“Whatever you say, my lord.”

—---------

Wrote a little thing featuring my sillies back in HW,, i love them so much aaaaahhh

[autumnslance]

send LOST for a scene from my muse's past in which they felt lost, literally or figuratively {Zaine}

He was supposed to protect her.

Zaine's axe and armor, Evienne's spells and social acumen. They were a matched set of opposites, a team that had traversed the realm for months now. That's how it worked.

On reflection, he really hadn't known her that long; less than a year. Yet everything they had gone through made it feel much longer, or at least more intense. They had shared their histories, their hopes, more than a few secrets.

Never a bed, though; as much as he'd come to love her, it was not in that way. And she was still mourning the loss of her spouse, besides. So fierce friends and comrades they were.

...They had been.

Zaine was going to tear Gaius van Baelsar into pieces.

"Hey," Yda said, wandering over to sit with him.

"Hey," he replied, taking a deep breath and sitting up. "You doing all right?"

"Yeah, I'm fine. How--"

"How about Papalymo? And Thancred?"

She frowned. "They're all right, Zaine. Everyone is."

Not everyone.

Before he could say more, she stuck her finger against his lips. "How are you?" she demanded to know, glimpses of her blue eyes through the mask showing her own sadness and resolve. She removed her finger.

Zaine slumped. "I keep feeling like I did everything wrong. Missed something, forgot something. If I'd been a little more on guard--and I know, I know that's not how it works, I know you all rushed cuz you only found out too late, but I--" He rested his head in his hands, clutching his hair.

"I feel like 'it's not your fault' won't help, huh?"

He huffed out a bitter laugh. "No." They were silent for a moment. "I know he targeted her as a caster, as a threat. Even if I had been in her place, even if I had been on guard. And I know...Evienne chose this, same as the rest of us, but it...Gods, this hurts."

"Of course it does," Yda replied softly. "It will for a long while."

He sat back now, leaning on the wall behind him, Yda watching. "If I knew anything of Eorzean etiquette as a boy, I forgot it. Evienne, though...she had impeccable manners. And took it upon herself to teach me better. My rough soldier ways grated on her lady's sensibilities." He smiled thinly. "I don't think I'd have made half as good an impression on all those people without her. And nevermind how many of her own heroics have been overlooked. It's not fair."

"A lot of things aren't," Yda said. "Minfilia's speaking to her sister, and her son. He's so little."

"Yeah," Zaine said. "Not much older than my sister was, when we lost our father. This kid's lost both his parents now and I don't...I feel like I should say something, but what? 'I was your mum's partner but failed to protect her from a Garlean bullet'?"

"Zaine, you can't say that."

"No, of course not, I just," he pinched his nose, trying to stay the renewed feeling of prickling heat in his eyes, threatening another deluge. "I don't know what to say. I don't know what to do. She would know; that's what she was good at! It's all her clever words and maneuvering that's made me seem a hero; people think I know what I'm doing, but I don't. And there's still so much happening, no time to sit here and wallow, but Sisters help me, I don't know how I'm going to do it without her!"

The tears fell despite his attempts; guilt and shame as much as grief pouring from him. Yda was silent, simply holding his hand, squeezing tightly, a reminder he had more friends and allies, more people to help, to rely on.

Just not his companion.

--

((As the 1.0 WoL, Zaine traveled around with a Path Companion, who I decided was a prim & proper elezen conjurer named Evienne. There is, however, a famous scene where Gaius shoots the Path Companion, and then fights Thancred, Y'shtola, Papalymo, and Yda. In Zaine's continuity, his Path Companion dies from the injuries inflicted in that incident.))

[paintedscales]

15 Lines of Dialogue

Share 15 or fewer lines of dialogue from an OC, ideally lines that capture the character/personality/vibe of the OC. Bonus points for just using the dialogue without other details about the scene, but you're free to include those as well!

Tagged by @ubejamjar

Tagging @ahollowgrave, @icehearts, @sealrock, @corsair-kovacs, @dragoon-mid-jump, @naejlas-axe

She did not know how long it took. By the time the girl made it to Reunion, dusk settled on the land. She was tired, she was hungry, sweat had clung to her, but most of all, she was happy. It showed in the smile that remained on her face since she started her journey. Happy… Happy she was alive. Happy that she broke her bonds. Happy that she made it at all. She gazed upon the bustling markets with a wide smile and tired eyes. It was time to fully embrace herself. Her victory. Her realization.

Taking in a breath, the girl yelled out with everything she had in that moment: “My name is Nomin! And I am worthy!”

“I…” Nomin started, taking a breath to both calm herself and give her a moment for her mind to formulate a coherent string of words. “Am I really the correct choice for this, Elder Seedseer? I…I just feel like maybe someone that is from Gridania or the Black Shroud as a whole may prove more…acceptable.”

Drawing her bow and pulling an arrow from her quiver, Nomin’s brow furrowed. Nocking her arrow, the auri called out to the other two: “I’ll fight alongside you, then. Let’s just hope they’re all bark and no bite…”

“Ith fial…” Nomin replied, shoving another delight in her mouth.

“What am I doing wrong!?” Nomin yelled, kicking her heels into the dirt and punching one of her fists into the ground next to her. The anger within her coalesced into a lump in her throat, and a tightening of her chest.

“Who’s broken now!?” Nomin bellowed, face contorted and eyes wide with fury.

“I wish only to see the Jhungid to victory so that we may triumph over the Kharlu. What use is a warrior that isn’t willing to be savage in their methods?”

“And what do you know of my skills, Ser Alberic?” The noisome ire and vitriol of summers past alongside the Jhungid stirred in Nomin’s chest and stomach as she took another sip from her mug. She hoped the warmth of it would wash away the feeling, but it only made it worse. Those memories bled with new ones as more words left her mouth.

“Were we still in Ishgard back then, I wouldn’t have entertained the very notion of telling you anything…” Nomin started. “But were Alphinaud here, he would likely be disappointed by whatever tension still remains between us. So you have him to thank as I keep him in my mind not to dismiss your question outright.”

“None of us have had time to just stop and mourn…” Nomin finally said, voice cracking slightly toward the end. She could feel tears threatening her, their sting at her eyes. She inhaled deeply, turning away from them and closing her eyes to attempt to slow the welling of any tears. “Haurchefant, Ysayle… By night’s good graces, we still have no idea where Minfilia is. Papalymo nor Yda… Why should I go to this private dinner when there is still much to figure out?”

“That…is a rather long story. One he would be better fit to tell you, actually,” Nomin replied, offering Krile a sheepish look while holding out her hand to take the auracite. “If you would, I know where to find him. Please.”

“Mm…” Nomin then furrowed her brow and steeled her gaze as she looked out toward the landscape. Though there were no towers nor beacons within sight, she had to remember that they were there, and that they were a threat. “With everything we’ve learned so far…we’ll need you and that lance of yours. So keep it and yourself sharpened.”

“Shut…up!” Nomin yelled at him. “The only one to die this day is…Nidhogg!”

“Would it not be wise to cut one’s losses and flee if they are clearly overwhelmed?” Nomin asked, doing everything within her power to keep her stance as neutral as possible. It was indicative of her tone, however, that there seemed to have been some values that she did not quite see eye-to-eye with.

“She is easily one of the most powerful spellcasters I have the honor of calling my friend.”

[trans-peridot]

FFxivWrite Day 4: Reticent

Saw this prompt and immediately knew it would have to be Urianger. Didn't know what, just knew who. In the end I settled on Tayfun's perspective of a certain scene in post-ARR. Spoilers for that, naturally. Urianger's dialogue is verbatim from the game, everything else is my writing.

Tayfun had never seen Urianger cry before. Perhaps simply because he’d never had cause in her presence, perhaps because of the dark goggles always obscuring his eyes. But more importantly than either of those reasons, because he went above and beyond in playing his emotions close to his chest. She had never seen him happy before, or angry, or really show any emotion. Alright, there had been one time. When Moenbryda first arrived in the Rising Stones and tackled him with a hug, Tayfun had gotten the briefest of glimpses to a rare Urianger emotion: flustered. Oh, Moenbryda...

Tayfun had never seen Urianger cry before. And even as he was speaking his soliloquy on her death, his voice remained as level as ever. But she could sense the effort he was putting into keeping it that way. “...Knowingly did I deny my friend the comfort she craved. And now she hath gone to her rest with doubt still in her heart.” Tayfun finally realized why he spoke like that. If every word was so strategically selected, emotion couldn’t sneak into one’s delivery.

“Urianger, you may wish to know what she said in her final moments. She spoke to Louisoix, said she finally understood his choice. She said, ‘In death there is life.’ I think she made her choice because she had cleared away that doubt.”

“Speakest thou in earnest? Did Moenbryda truly come to understand Master Louisoix's will before the end?” Tayfun had never seen Urianger cry before. On his face must have been the legendary Goggles of Reticence. “The realization hath set her free. She may now find the peace which hath for so long eluded her.” He remained stonefaced. “Oh, Moenbryda... My dearest... How I shall miss thee...”

“But her very last words weren’t to Louisoix. The very last thing she said was... She said, ‘Farewell, Urianger... you daft old coot.’ Her last thoughts were of you.”

Tayfun had never seen Urianger cry before. But as she studied his face, she could have sworn she saw a single drop of moisture slip past his defenses. “My lady Minfilia. I would mourn Moenbryda in mine own way. I beg your permission to return to the Waking Sands.” Tayfun knew that quaver all too well. He couldn’t hold it in forever and he needed to get out now before they saw him feel something. He didn’t even wait to hear Minfilia’s reply in the affirmative before he turned to brisky escape the eyes of his comrades.

For a moment Tayfun considered going after him, offering a shoulder to cry on, telling him he didn’t need to hide his feelings from his friends. But Tayfun had never seen him cry before, and that was clearly on purpose. Though it pained her to admit it, the best thing she could do was allow him to grieve alone. There were enough scions still in the room with her who would want her help, anyway.

[hydaelyns-silliest-jester]

Heavensward patch thoughts not in any particular order

1. I had known about Krile as a character for a while because I love her jacket and I saw the pictomancer trailer so I was always excited to meet her. But her showing up and IMMEDIATELY roasting Alphinaud? PRICELESS. MIGHT I HAVE YOUR HAND IN MARRIAGE

2. THANCRED BABYGIRL I MISSED YOU SO MUCH. WHAT HAPPENED TO YOUR EYE. Tasteful nutkin was a waste of resources. Show me Thancred cock and balls. Don’t cuck me twice (Benadryl prophecy of Thancred being next door or in Garlemald proven true. Also he has to walk everywhere now? That sucks. There are ways around that, but Eorzea is built for aether manipulation. Y’shtola has quickly found a way around her disability with what she has deemed to be an acceptable trade off. Thancred’s disrupted aether is going to prove to be much more difficult to get around

3. What’s up with the warriors of darkness? The leader is funny, if a bit of a cunt. Do they all have the echo, they all grabbed their heads when Ru had a vision. They’ve fucked off for now. Is the expansion that literally implies darkness in the title (shadowbringers) about them???

4. I love Thancred and Hilda’s dynamic

5. Rather surprised that Vidofnir was willing to show up. Which. HOLY FUCK THAT CHILD ALMOST DIED. THEY ALMOST MADE ME WATCH A CHILD DIE. Aymeric has SO MUCH catholic guilt and he’s trying to hold this situation together with duct tape

6. Yda and Papalymo sighting! I thought they were with the sylphs, but it looks like they are in little Al Ahmigo. Only Scion whose whereabouts are still unknown is Minfilia. I think she’s in the void

7. Back to Ishgard, I really did not expect to like Atoriel this much. He really stepped up. The loss of Haurchefant and his father telling Aymeric that he considers him a son really had an impact and while he very much could have chosen to resent Ru and Aymeric, he chose to honor his brother’s memory and extend his hand in aid. Props to him. Emmanalain seems to have come to a different choice and I am nervous as to what that is

8. OH NO Urianger. Do not pick up the forbidden prophecy book. You will find the horrors there. Still. WHY ARE YOU WITH ELIDIBUS AND THE WARRIOR OF DARKNESS. ALISAIE IS VERY MUCH GOING TO DRAW CONCLUSIONS FROM THIS

9. Honestly I’m more scared of Elidibus than Lahabrea. He’s hiding something behind the guise of civility. He smiles like someone who has heard a smile described to them but cannot get it quite right, or someone who has forgotten how to use their facial muscles in order to smile. It’s creepy

10. Nidhogg continues to be a problem. I expected this. I miss Estinien. Alphinaud really connected with both him and Ysayle and it is HEARTBREAKING to see him mourn the loss of both of them

11. Before I cared about spoilers one of my friends mentioned that Aymeric got stabbed. However he used the words “lightly stabbed”. THAT WAS NOT LIGHT. THAT WAS SEVERAL INCHES OF STEEL STRAIGHT TO THE GUT. AND THEN HE PROCEEDED TO FIGHT OFF DISSIDENTS. AYMERIC YOU ARE GOING TO RIP YOUR STITCHES

12. I hate the Vault. Ru hates the Vault. Thorn REALLY hates the vault. Can we burn it down already

SO MUCH HAPPENED IN THIS PATCH I PROBABLY MISSED SOMETHING BUT WOWIE. THIS IS GETTING GOOD AND MY MISERY IS INCREASING. I CAN’T WAIT TO SEE WHAT HAPPENS NEXT

[windupaidoneus]

hi thistle i wanted to ask abt hancock and hlidegarde .. what is their dynamic like what were their first impressions of each other 🤲 <- me with my hands out ready to receive info

OKAY I AM FREE FROM. well everything really. ITS TIME TO TYPE!!!!! HI CLARA BELATED REPLY & do not worry i have not forgotten the other ask either i prommy

also i took like four separate days to actually type all of this my ability to focus is so shot. BUT I DID IT

the first impressions are a little funny bc from my understanding most of my friends' wols had a very different one. HDJSHKJG

so it was in earlyish stb right. we have a hilde who's still in mourning from. well. points at haurche. hes basically a widower at that point since they were engaged. minfilia also just basically died for real, papalymo died, they went to rhalgr's reach & shit got fucked, kind of the maze of torments (as per usual) for him. but hes trying to stay #silly & not think too hard about it so he can be there for lyse & thancred & whatever. he IS considering necromancy at this stage but is still focused on tempering research for the time being

enter hancock whose first interaction is to make a joke about teledji's corpse. i wouldnt say hilde was charmed romantically but like. it caught him off guard & he found it really funny?? it was a bit of an unhinged joke & his friends had all been REALLY serious & sad of late (& i mean himself too but yknow. in his mind he did not have it the worst so he should help others first. the usual) so hancock was a breath of fresh air in that sense. they got on pretty well from that point on despite hancock working for lolorito & hilde's apprehensions as a result, much to tataru's dismay. but ultimately he just wasn't the backstabber or evil schemer type, just a very peculiar autistic man who was given a lot of power & used it for his. autistic ends. so. yeah. it went okay.

on hancock's end i believe hildegarde would've been a rather daunting name to hear about until he first met him. he wasn't really scared, because he has no reason to be in the wol's bad books when he was offering help in the first place!, but it was basically just like meeting a celebrity (who had butted heads with his boss slash father figure of sorts no less), right? so there was some anticipation. but it turned out the warrior was actually a pretty meek-looking sad little thing so he got comfortable pretty quickly. i don't think he expected the joke to be taken as well as it did. not sure what he actually expected if anything at all. probably mostly a sense of unease? or just mild laughter but not much else? i think he was just establishing himself & who he is. & somehow that would be the thing that their dynamic would found itself on. lmao

speaking of their dynamic. it's... they get along very well? scarily so?? they don't really argue or anything. kinda just yes and-ing each other. hancock asks hilde for help while showering him with praise to butter him up & hilde just rolls his eyes with a smile goes to do it before hancock even finishes. whenever hilde has the free time for it he'll visit & they spend a few days together (before emet comes back. after he does emet is also spending a few days together with them). hilde tends to tease him a fair bit which he takes well initially but progressively gets more prone to getting flustered. he greatly enjoys it bc he is sick in the head

there is some vulnerability with them too though ofc. i don't think it came up much before post shb (THEY DID FUCK IN POST STB THOUGH!!!! IMPORTANT!!) but hilde probably brought up haurche in passing & tried to not delve into it too much. it was still something that needed to be expressed at some point because otherwise he's kinda just... the wol... unaffected by everything that happens to him & he keeps marching on... & i mean. hancock is clever enough to of course know hilde is more than what the tales sing & whatever. but it's still a nice reality check. reminds him the wol is really just a person at the end of the day. & when it's just them in a room together they are on equal footing. it's not a legend & just some merchant. it's two people

post shb is where they really hit the whole getting close thing... yknow. since. hilde comes back after not that long from hancock's pov & yet he's looking FUCKED. UP! & he's clearly beyond exhausted. honestly he's not even that recognisable at that point shb really got him good... but it's him & that's what matters. obviously hancock is worried. even if hilde's only request when he visits is a really unusual one & perhaps even unsettling ("can i drink your blood please" isn't usually something that's said between them but there's a first for everything!! #hewashungry) he kinda has to oblige just out of concern. the explanations come later alongside a good deal of crying & apologising. hilde spends quite a bit of time at his place recuperating from. everything. & everytime he does something he comes back to hancock when hes done. like the werlyt trials. edw is a whole ordeal bc he has to spend so much time away from hancock which is NOT THE WORST I GUESS since emet is in his head by that point (this guy needs a supervisor at all times at that point in time) but god after elpis he needs a fuuucking break. & he doesnt get one!!! he just gets to think really hard about how he wishes he could be with his normal best friend hancock right now & kinda vanishes from front for a little bit

post edw is great because of beautiful mt rokkon though. it was kinda platonic (according to both of them) for the longest time but once they get to spend time together alone on that mountain is where they both get more acutely aware that it's probably not platonic anymore... which is fun bc well emet does come back around that time. so hancock & hilde dont really talk about shit for a while. bc hilde is sorting out whatever awkward shit is going on with emet initially. & then he has to introduce emet to hancock. it doesnt really make things awkward with hancock bc hes kinda fine with everything & honestly im going to say emet being a tall & kinda intimidating guy with a very powerful & imposing aura (& also his bitchy countenance) was probably a bit of a fingertips touching thing to him... insert that one post thats like joining someone elses relationship scoot over i love yall. hancock did this. emet thought there would be some sort of competition (that he would win effortlessly) but turns out the little normal ass guy also wants him. he's fine with this

i got wildly sidetracked. hilde wears the pants ☝️ these three would be a fucking nightmare at a fancy party of sorts they are gossiping the wholeeeee time. & if theyre dragging alisaie & nero with them? dont even get me started. the worst family has shown up

um. oh yeah. they did have feelings for a while but said like Nothing... on hancock's part bc he believed himself out of hilde's league (not in a self deprecating way just. thtas the whole wol mate thats an entirely different level!) & on hilde's part bc well he IS the wol & he's probably going to die young with all the shit they're making him do & it's probably not even reciprocated bc hes kinda lame & honestly he doesnt quite get why hancock puts up with him despite having seen him at his lowest & knowing the myth of the wol is really just a myth. & also getting hancock involved romantically with him would put greater emotional strain on him if anything did happen to hilde. you know how it is!!!!!

[treexsong]

What would your character claim was their greatest 'loss'? Was it a person, place or aspect of themselves? How did they deal with the grief? Are they still affected by it to this day?

unprompted asks | accepting | @gatheredfates

First off, thank you so much for sending me this! It took me a good while to find a concrete answer, but I think I finally have one for you. I hope I didn't make you wait for too long!!

Mjrn has been dealt a terrible hand with all the tragedies and losses in her life. As a Warrior of Light, she had to make sacrifices for the greater good of the world and its people. She lost so many people close to her: Minfilia, Haurchefant, Papalymo, and many of the other Scions she had grown to call friends, even family. However, the one loss that shook Mjrn to her core was when she traveled to Othard, her former homeland.

While the young Viera doesn't have many memories that she can remember, she does vividly recall hearing the Green Word and finding solace in it. When the Garlean Empire's conquest managed to reach her clan, she and her sibling, Sinde, were forced to flee and leave everything behind. Mjrn had no way of knowing whether or not they survived, but when she arrived at the Wood, it became clear.

Leaving meant that she could no longer hear the Green Word. She found no comfort in its whispers; silence was her answer. There was also no trace of her clan; it was almost as if they never existed in the first place. The realization nearly broke her, and then guilt flooded her senses. To make matters worse, she had failed to keep her beloved sister alive.

Mjrn was unsure how to handle the grief at first. She distracted herself with her work with the Scions, perfecting her ability with the bow, anything to keep from losing herself. However, in recent days, shortly after preventing the Final Days, she finally allowed herself a moment to mourn, grieve, and shed tears. To this day, she refuses to let herself dwell on her losses, and instead, she keeps her lost loved ones in her heart and considers herself blessed to have found a family in the remaining Scions whom she has grown to love and care for deeply.

[storms-path]

FFXIV Write 2023 Day 28 - Blunt

“You’re dying.” Y’shtola was through the door without allowing a word of protest, Ryne trailing more sheepishly after her and ducking under Arashi’s arm. With a huff Arashi shut the door behind them, turning to face the pair and ignoring the man only she could see standing just behind them.

“And good evening to you too, Y’sholta, how fare you this fine night?” She didn’t need mistress Rhul’s acid tongue, not with her head feeling ready to split open. It didn’t help that Y’shtola was right. But it didn’t help anyone to shout it from the heavens, especially when Sanda was mercifully still in the dark about it.

Y’shtola met her snark with the flat look it deserved. “Don’t try to brush me off with your cheek. Urianger may be content to keep his silence but I am most certainly not.” Her ears were flat against her head, tail swishing dangerously behind her. But it was Ryne’s worried glance that held Arashi in place. In those new blue eyes Arashi saw a very different girl, six years and a world away, wondering if it was going to be alright. She’d let that girl down then. She was preparing to do it again.

Arashi rubbed her aching temples and crossed the distance between them. “Fine, yes, I’m dying. The Light is killing me. What good does admitting it do? It’s not as if I can stop now, is it? Not when we only have a single Lightwarden to end.” One more. Just one more. Then she could rest.

“And when that Lightwarden’s resplendent aether is too much for you to take, what then? Would you have us simply stand by and watch our champion die?” Y’shtola’s tone was arch, but she couldn’t hide the undercurrent of fear underneath it. “Are you truly so self-absorbed that you’d just shoulder this burden alone with nary a thought for what you’ll be leaving behind? Who will tell her, with the rest of us stranded on this reflection?” Arashi flinched at the barb, not missing Ryne’s small gasp at the same time.

“Do you think that’s not all I’ve thought about once I realised what was going on, Y’shtola?” Rage flooded Arashi just as the Light had. She didn’t realise her tightly clenched fists, didn’t quite register that she’d stepped so close to the sorceress. Y’shtola was, of course, unimpressed. “Every night I lie awake and think about her, waiting for me to come home! I think about her slowly realising I’m not coming back! I think about her mourning for me, coming to resent me, dying of Black bloody Rose because of me! Because I failed her! If I have to push myself to the brink to end this, so be it! Better that than her and everyone else I love dying!”

“And what about us, then? What do you expect us to do when the aether in you finally twists you into a Lightwarden? Do we truly mean so little to you? Does Fareena, does Stalwart, does Sanda, do I mean absolutely nothing, just meaningless noise? Are we not friends, Arashi Washi? Do my feelings not matter?” It was the break in Y’shtola’s voice that struck home. Arashi backed away unsteadily, blinking rapidly. Ryne took the opportunity to step between the pair.

“Please stop.” Ryne’s voice was barely a whisper compared to the two, but the steel beneath it was all the Minfilia of old. It was enough to break the tension fully. With a wordless nod Arashi and Y’shtola took seats at the table, Ryne standing between them still. Arashi took a steadying breath, hoping that the other denizens of the Pendants hadn’t heard their little spat.

“So what do you intend to do about it?” Arashi had to try hard to keep the hope from her voice, but she managed it. Barely. “Unless you’ve found some miracle cure in your dusty old tomes, I fail to see that we have any way out of this.”

“Not a cure, but perhaps we can stave it off somewhat?” Ryne’s voice had all the hope Arashi had shoved aside. “I’m still the Oracle of Light, perhaps I can help calm your aether! And the Exarch-”

“Well, the less said about that man, the better.” Y’shtola’s icy tone cut through Ryne with practised nonchalance. “Whatever his agenda, I’ve heard quite enough about him for one day. Ryne, do what you can to keep our friend alive. Arashi, hold still and don’t complain. And don’t glare at me either, it’s childish.” Arashi turned her head to scowl at the wall instead, but she didn’t complain as Ryne went to work. Once again she tried to ignore Ardbert staring back at her. If she didn’t, she’d have to acknowledge the look in his eyes. The worry. The fear. The pity.

And beneath it all, the loneliness. As Ryne chattered and Y’shtola snarked, Arashi was elsewhere. She was in Ala Mhigo, envisioning a woman lying anxiously in bed, desperately hoping that her love would return. Praying for it. Then she was barely a few rooms away, picturing her sister straining her hearing to pick out all the words behind layers of brickwork. Furious and terrified and trying to deny the truth she’d already figured out.

Arashi had never felt more alone.

[ahollowgrave]

15. what would your wol be if they weren't the wol? what would they do as a job or career? would they be happier?

Odette would still be a full Sister of her convent! It is the stirring of the Echo that prompts Odette to leave her convent in the first place. Without it and the sense of urgency it fills her with she would still be sat at the kitchen counter; helping her Sisters prepare their evening meal and basking in the sound of their voices. Caring for the communities of the Shroud as best they can. Laughter and song and love.

“Happier” is… tricky. There are griefs she wouldn’t know, certainly, but only because she would never know the love that proceeds the hurt. There would be no Minfilia, nor the long process of mourning her. There would Thancred and the relief of leaning on each other and the anger that rises between siblings. No twins to feel responsible for and proud of and annoyed with. No Urianger to see herself reflected in, no Y’shtola to fear and learn from.

No Krile.

No Prudence.

Things would be different. I don’t think she’d be happier.

Thank you so much for the ask! ][ Pre-Dawntrail WoL Questions ][

[dainesanddaffodils]

As ya girl leaves Heavensward and enters Stormblood it is time to revisit her Warrior of Light's feelings on the world and characters around her.

To see her earlier feelings on characters post-ARR please see HERE

Without further ado - Cimorene Geneq Greystone's Post-Heavensward Relationship Vibes

Starting right off the bat with-

Haurchefant - what is there to say? she loved him. she loved him so much she can't put words to it in the wake of losing him, and maybe never will. there's a jack and rose from titanic vibe to it, in that she truly feels like he saved her, in every sense, and as much as his death destroyed her she's not going to throw her life away because he would've wanted her to live. they weren't married before he died, but they had intended to, so she does take his name afterward - again in a very jack and rose way. she will carry him with her forever.

Alphinaud - would kill for him. would die for him. he is 100% the scion she is closest to, to the point where it definitely transcends scions for her. that's just her baby brother. don't fucking touch him.

Tataru - continues to be best girl who deserves nothing but good things now and forever

Ysayle - felt an echo-kinship/sisterhood with her that she never really felt with Minfilia, oddly enough, and always knew her heart was in the right place even when she didn't agree with her methods. She was already numb from losing Haurchefant so she didn't have a very strong reaction to her death in the moment but it still hurt her deeply.

Estinien - Gets Him on, like, a fundamental level - and that’s even before losing Haurchefant puts her on a similar revenge path. Doesn’t always agree with him, mind you, but Gets Him. If she had actually lost him alongside Haurchefant and Ysayle… she would have ended this expansion in a very VERY dark place. Finds his and Alphinaud’s relationship incredibly endearing and has a non-zero amount of attraction toward him that she is Not Acknowledging, Thank You.

Aymeric - choosing to read that dinner date as Let's Mourn the Good Man We Both Feel Responsible for Getting Killed... Together. He still remains too much of a politician for Cimorene to feel truly comfortable around him - again, in spite his best efforts. her favorite thing about him, genuinely, is how much he cares about Estinien

Edmont - let's just say, there's a reason Cimorene took Greystone as her last name and not de Fortemps. He has a good heart, and she respects him, but she does sure land in Ishgard and immediately see how his parenting fucked up all three of his sons in different ways and kinda chooses to keep her distance from him, emotionally. she had an excellent father, in her opinion, and even though he's gone she's not in the market for a replacement, thank you.

Artoirel - Honey, Cimorene was NOT like a sister to Haurchefant at all, but she will gladly be a sister to you. His eldest daughter energy is off the charts and she cares him very much. (Also I, Tangy the player, have an AU where he and Cimorene have a political marriage and I have feelings about it)

Emmanellain - spends every second with him either annoyed with him or deeply, deeply angry on his behalf because it is clear to her most of his behavior is due to the aforementioned fucked up upbringing. Still, she doesn't like either emotion he gives her and so, admittedly, also tries to keep herself distant from him. She feels kind of guilty about that.

Y'shtola - she was pulled out of the Lifestream while Cimorene was still in a really bad place post-Vault and was kind of just operating on autopilot so, like Ysayle's death, it didn't Hit her as much as it would have any other time. As feeling slowly returns to her, she is glad that she has Y'shtola back; her no-nonsense attitude is MUCH appreciated

Thancred - Cimorene is dealing with a lot of grief and he is dealing with a lot of grief and this means she doesn’t really know how to deal with him. She’s not beefing with him by any means but she’s also more than happy to give him the space she understands he would want.

Warriors of Darkness - at first had no thoughts other than 'You know those days when you're like, 'this might as well happen?'' Then she got like, their whole story and she is simultaneously heartbroken and terrified of repeating what happened to them. It’s kinda a background/subconscious dread right now but she WILL be having nightmares about it!

Urianger - he gives her the heebie-jeebies. he has nothing else to give [bass boosted]

Krile - *shoves adoptions papers in her face* you're Cimorene's mom now do not resist

Alisaie - she maybe... forgot Alphinaud was a twin if she's being purely honest. HOWEVER it took the space of one conversation for it to go from confusion to adoption. that's Cimorene's baby sister. don't fucking touch her.

Yda/Lyse - kinda surprised at how NOT upset she is with the whole false identity thing. The Cimorene of ARR would probably have asked ‘why didn’t you tell me?’ when it was an option to do so but like, she gets it now. Grief, uh, fucks you up. That’s not important; what matters is having Lyse’s back now - and she does.

Papalymo - Tangy the player had his death spoiled EARLY into playing so like, I knew. But also, Tangy the player cried upon hearing that he was eventually going to die when I had only had him for like 24 hours so to say it still hit both me and Cimorene very hard in the moment is an understatement. She is. very angry now. She is going into Stormblood just so fucking angry.

[crystalmarred]

🤍 Anyone please hug Minfilia

MEME ( accepting! ) ⇢ send 🤍 for a wildcard hug. ⇢ @thescions

"If I was quicker or wiser..."

He'd heard those words before or at least ones near enough that the difference 'tween 'em didn't matter. He'd heard after Arenvald and the others had been returned to them, when she'd heard that A'aba had survived by the skin of his teeth, but Aulie... Aulie had passed, her life extinguished in the same instance his should'a been.

Arenvald had wept. A'aba had wept long before either of them had, had run out of guilt to cry about before they'd made it back to see more than the cracks in the bedside table and the splinters left behind in the side of his fist before the panicked conjurer attending him had convinced him to stop, please stop, you'll hurt yourself.

He'd heard it before, these condolences of Minfilia's, meant as much for the departed as they were those that mourned them. Maybe she thought shouldering the blame would somehow placate the worst of their grief.

"Lass, it ain't..."

Yer fault, he meant to say, but the words stuck in his throat when she glanced up to address him. Her blue eyes caught on the bandage that still peeked out from beneath his clothes. It was only a moment, but he didn't have a skull full of sea water, much as he wished it was some days.

"... C'mere," A'aba said as he reached around her, pulled her into a hug he'd rarely offered. Hells, he'd only given Arenvald a good and proper hug the once when the lad had found out about Aulie.

"It ain't yer fault," he whispered, unable to blame her for what she had already wholly blamed herself for. "So don't blame yerself for it this time..."

[thefinalwitness]

15 + 20 for atlas :3c

THANK U KIMMMMM FOR MY LIFE

15. What places hold significant meaning or memories for your OC? Do they have a positive or negative association with those places?

in a way, atlas considers all of etheirys sentimental and precious! it was the home of her original creator and best friend, and even though she's gone and the world is so different, atlas knows venat loved it then and would love it now. she was a force of change in a world that wanted to stagnate, movement where all else paused.

upon finding out they can traverse the reflections of the source though, and finding out an intact ruin of an ancient academy still exists, atlas does hold a special place in their heart for it. it's the only true fossil of what was, what they left so suddenly on their mission to save meteion. they didn't even think much of the school originally, but now that it's all that's left as it was 12k years ago, it's unfathomably precious to them.

they also, in a weird sort of way, feel sentimental about ultima thule. it was at the edge of the universe, more than lifetimes from etheirys, yet they spent 12k years there, and all 12k were in the effort of saving a friend they hadn't had for more than 48 hours previously. the place was lonely, hopeless and frankly it's the stuff of atlas's nightmares.

but it was also the destination of their last instruction from venat; the stage where her last wish to atlas would play out. and, for better or worse, it was their and meteion's home, and it was where meteion finally came back to them. they are permanently, intrinsically tied to ultima thule, and it'd be hard for them to feel only negatively or only positively for such a complicated place.

20. Has your OC ever done something terrible and lied about it? Did they run away or blame someone else for it? How long did they maintain the lie and did the truth ever come out?

post-ultima thule, i think they initially didn't LIKE minfilia very much? and minfilia didn't really like them either. but atlas sort of blamed her for venat's demise, even though minfilia was such a teeny, inconsequential part of it—like, whether or not minfilia had asked to return to life, venat was going to be no more that day. what she gave to save minfilia wouldn't have been enough to save herself.

but atlas struggles with that for a while, looking for a cause, a reason; it's easier to face loss when you believe there was anything you could have done differently, that there WAS a chance, that you DID have a say in the matter. but the reality is atlas didn't. venat was going to die that day no matter what they could've or couldn't've done. minfilia asking for life had no impact on that outcome whatsoever.

atlas, more than anything, lied to themself about it. that they didn't hate minfilia, not for that reason anyway, that they just didn't like her, even though they couldn't name one single other thing about her that made them angry. over the six months between 6.0 and 6.1, i think atlas is able to move through more of their grief and accept minfilia as herself, not as some kind of catalyst through which venat died. they're able to bond over their shared mourning. they both would've done anything to save venat, and they both have to accept that there was never anything they could've done.

they did admit they used to hate minfilia, and minfilia isn't surprised they felt that way. likewise, minfilia didn't like THEM much—venat often mourned their loss, even though she had ordered it, and minfilia found herself wondering, "how could you never come back?" even though she knew the answer was that meteion's song of oblivion would destroy everything, even though minfilia once had to make the very same choice herself, and had chosen the same as atlas. minfilia and atlas each felt as if the other had wronged venat, but really just saw a lot of themselves IN each other in how they'd "failed" venat, even though they'd done everything she asked, even though in her eyes they had beyond succeeded. minfilia and atlas never run away from each other, but they do have a wall between them that takes a long time to break down before they can admit to the truth of it all.

atlas isn't designed nor inclined to act outwardly cruel—as a creation of venat, they were designed to be a guiding star for the lost, in whatever way that person was lost (physically, mentally, etc). but on the topic of lying, they will lie if the truth brings little to no purpose or solace to someone else, and they will do so with ease. it's their purpose to help others find their way, not hinder them, and so long as the truth doesn't hold a crucial piece of the puzzle, they'll lie about it for the sake of the objective: helping that person find their way.

they don't always FEEL good about it though. even as a creation, a "concept" that was not born and does not necessarily hold a personality or "soul" the way a man does, they recognize that there is something to mourn in depriving another of the truth. that even if without the truth they are happier, even able to find hope they otherwise couldn't have, atlas recognizes that the sadness or anger remains, sitting between them and the recipient, never to be grasped, yet always touching both of them.

i think the one and only lie atlas has ever told, and it was to themself, that they'd never be able to face is that, every so often in ultima thule, they'd wished they had the power to kill meteion. that they hated her. that they wanted to go home. that meteion's belief that all hope dies, that all life is meaningless and death is the only answer, was further proven in atlas's weakest moments, when they almost wanted to give up, when the fight didn't feel worth it anymore.

they can't admit it because meteion believes atlas was one of the only people that never stopped believing in her, that never gave up hope for her. the fact atlas did eats at them, but to admit it—to confess that meteion was, at least sometimes, right about them—would be to obstruct her way. the truth would hinder meteion, possibly irreversibly, and so not only can atlas not tell her because they are not designed to obstruct someone's hope, they wouldn't even if they could. they don't think they could live with it being more than a ghost in their head, especially if anything happened to meteion as a result of it.

[roguelioness]

Endwalker gathering quests make me feel a kind of way

On the floor about Zenos' death giving rise to new life.

Thinking of Aly, struggling to recover, to heal, being coaxed by this tiny, exuberant, hopeful creature to help.

And there, amidst the barren, cold, harsh landscape at the very edge of the universe, forms something new and bright, brimming with potential. The newborn land, unforgiving and stony, changing to something lush and vibrant.

It hits her then - this is what remains of Zenos. And as she watches beings from empires long gone walk about this new ground - warring factions at peace, diseased peoples whole and healthy, apathy cast aside in favor of a desire to protect, she weeps.

(Angry tears, at first. Why is it him and not any of the many kind, compassionate friends she lost that gets the chance to do this? Why does he get a chance to leave this kind of legacy when all that remains of Haurchefant, Minfilia, Moenbryda grey stone to mark their graves. It's not fair)

She does not mourn his death, nor his life. (in quieter moments she hears his voice, raspy and clotted - was this life worth it - and wonders if he was asking her, or himself)

(she harvests a new kind of grain from verdant green fields and thinks of a city in ruins, its people turned to monsters)

She weeps for what he could have been had all of his intelligence and determination and forethought been tempered with kindness and affection.

(she remembers what it was like to be in a body not her own. there had been a slice of sachertorte on the side. she still didn't know how he'd learned of her fondness for the dessert)

She mourns, because beneath all the destruction he sought, there must have been a kernel of hope for a better life, a better future.

(she thinks a path walked alone, but not truly. of a dragon bearing her on its back as she battled despair itself)

How else could she explain this small new world?

(she thinks of bleeding wounds, broken bones. of the way she'd accepted her death as her vision grew darker and her awareness faded)

(of waking to find herself surrounded by love)

In life, his aether wrought destruction. In death, his dynamis offers a means of construction.

And Aly's own soul heals as she watches this new life bloom.