#Sorry it's so short i had one idea and it did a 180 and I've rewritten this

[transcredwaters]

31. “I’ll take that bet.”

The air was bitter. Tight and suffocating it hung over the trio.

Emet waited for a lingering O'miz to depart, wringing his hands as if impatience were getting to his head.

Suilosaux merely raised a brow and pushed his upper lip up with his lower just a moment, leaning forward slightly to whisper in his ear; "Have ye learn'd nothin ' ? Patience is a virtue, m' dear." A dry chuckle escaped as he watched Emet's expression turn into a tight-lipped grimace, O'miz's soon to follow in turn- though he knew the miqo'te heard not what he said- they were likely reacting to expressions only.

There was silence a moment - the bitterness hung in the air - before Miz finally turned tail and departed, tail clutched in his own hands.

Suilosaux let out a sigh, running a hand through his hair as he leaned into Emet. "There's no tellin' when 'e'll listen. I'll bet anythin' 'e never will, 'lest ya find a new way t' worm under 'is skin."

"I'll Take that bet."

Once again the brow went up, as he turned to stare where the warrior of light left. "Ya certain ? 'E doesn' seem t' wan' to, Emet. Nor care fer yer. . . methods of speakin' t' 'im."

The pause that stretched between the two then wasn't long, yet it felt as if it were much more.

"We'll find out. Hyacinthus was stubborn as all hells, but there were ways to get around him."

". . . I think these are two very diff'rent cases, dear."

With the comment, Emet crossed his arms. "Truthfully. I never had to get so cross with them as I have with Tia. But I find myself certain I can get that little mite to listen. . ."

And there goes the classic hand wave.

"unfortunately, our little kitty friend has bored me once again. Let us take this elsewhere. I no longer wish to let him plague my mind for the time being. . ."

Suilosaux merely pursed his lips as he followed behind Emet, Heartseeker gripped tightly in his hands. Always the overthinker always paranoid. . .

[queers-gambit]

Bloodhounds

prompt: you and your husband have a different kind of foreplay that include disguises, sneaking out of the castle, and sometimes, fucking in an alleyway... Or two.

pairing: Aemond Targaryen x highborn!female!reader no specified House

fandom masterlist: House of the Dragon

word count: 5.7k+

note: also NO physical description of skin, hair, but height IS mentioned inna way and weight IS insinuated because - let's face it - fucking against a wall ain't easy!! this is a STAND ALONE.

warnings: poor excuse for smut, explicit / descriptive language, i guess this is porn with a plot?? (surprise!) there's cursing, Cherry needs to get laid ASAP, stop giving her internet access!! half-edited, author mildly gave up. ✅ spoiler free

"My Lady, how go your studies? Aemond says you're making grand progress," Alicent smiled, leaning back in her high-back chair with a goblet of wine in her always-tight manicured grip.

"Oh," you quickly swallowed the bit of food in your mouth, perfectly trained to take small bites for moments such as these - but also, because it was 'unladylike' to eat with fuller cheeks. With a quick dab of the cloth napkin left on your lap, you nodded at her, "My Lord husband likes to exaggerate. Studies are going well enough, My Queen, but surely, I've much farther to go."

She hummed in contemplation, "From what I've heard, you're planning a trip to Pentos?"

Ah, so this is the reason she wanted you alone.

"I am wrestling with the idea, Lady," you assured softly, "yet, there has been no decision made, nor am I swaying any which way more heavily." You watched her carefully, "You have an opinion on the matter, do you not?"

"How can I not, sweet child," she sighed, setting her goblet down as you did the same to the utensils in hand, "when there is a possibility my son is leaving?"

You couldn't help it, truly. But the laugh was genuine, "My Queen! There is not a world in which I would dare take your son from you. If I decided to venture to Pentos, it will not be with my white-haired husband and his 180-year-old dragon. That warrants attention I do not wish for."

"You are a Targaryen now - "

"I do not look it," you nodded. "I have a no-name face and can still travel undetected. Your son cannot afford the same luxury."

"And yet, I cannot shake this feeling..."

"That feeling you feel is natural for every mother," you nodded, taking a sip of water to clear your mouth and throat of residue. "It is the dread that your children are growing up and will leave, like you were forced to as a girl." Her face was painted in earnest shock. "Do not think so little of me, Your Grace, I've done my fair share of familial research - but also, the maids like to gossip." Alicent chuckled some. "I am truly sorry for your mother, and that you had to leave home to live with your father here... But there will come a time your kids are going to spread their leathery wings and fly. If it's something I've learned in the few, short years of marriage? You cannot hold dragons back. Believe me when I say, I do not want to take your son from you, but should he make his decision, that's only his to make. For now, I am simply weighing pro's and con's. The idea of adventure is a little too tantalizing."

Alicent regarded you for a long moment before slowly nodding, "Then it shall be his decision."

"If you'd like, if I go and end up in Braavos or other, I'll send a barrel of spiced wine."

"Oh, you," she chuckled, waving you off some.

"How fairs the King?"

Alicent paused to smile softly at the woman she married her son to, and for a moment, let her heart beat with pride at such a fine young woman joining her family. Y/N L/N was a woman of great beauty and even greater brains, a woman her son could engage with; a woman she was pleased to see fit in effortlessly. There wasn't a single soul in the entire castle who did not like her - and it came in handy at times.

Y/N was also the only one who ever bothered to ask about Viserys anymore, too. So, Alicent smiled and nodded, "He has his good days and bad."

You nodded slowly. "I remember when my grandfather started to lose his mind... It was gradual, then one day, it was like a switch flipped. For the last few years of his life, he didn't know who I was, but with Mum and Da' out, workin', doin' whatever they needed to, I was with him day in and out... It wasn't easy."

"You've never spoke of your family before," Alicent sat up in intrigue. "Three years being married, six months of courting before that - and you've never spoke of them," Alicent looked at you with a sense of wonder.

"Some family's aren't worth the effort to discuss," you shrugged a bit. "The moment you sent word for the courting season, away I was swept, and my father was adamant on making a match. Can you imagine how happy he was to learn I was courting the Prince?"

"Was he?" Alicent asked softly, giving a knowing look.

"He kept asking if it were true, and asked if his dragon took his eye," you snickered to her. "Kept asking what rumors were true."

"Gods," she chuckled.

"I told him outlandish things," you admitted with a snicker. "He caught on eventually, cursed me to all Seven Hells... Stopped writing, and then word reaches me of his passing. Hm," you shrugged a bit.

"Well, you're better off without, yes?"

"Indeed, I'd say... Look, Your Grace, I have not made any decision about my travels. As of right now, I'm okay reading my books and letting my mind go on adventures - I will tell you when I have made a decision."

"All right..."

"You will be the second to know, after Aemond, of course."

She smiled, "Yes, yes. Of course."

You glanced out the window to the sun's position, finding it nearly completely gone, and turned to your mother-by-law. "Speaking of, I'm sure he's expecting me soon. I'll be going now," you stood slowly, waiting for her to stop you.

"Of course, yes, yes, go on," she smiled. "Thank you for tonight."

"Always my pleasure," you promised with a curtesy, turning after, and exiting the room. "Have a good evening, Ser Cole."

"And you, Princess," he nodded with a soft smile. "Good supper?"

"Oh, you know I have a love-affair with Chef Hayford's cooking," you chuckled, watching him return it with a nod of agreement.

Turning forward, you only had to travel a short way; mostly turning down three different stone corners to reach a more secluded hallway. Aemond preferred solitude, so, when you married, you snagged up the suite in the Western Wing that was newly renovated - but it was "sadly" away from most of the castle's traffic. So, of course it was perfect for the pair of you.

When you slipped in the door, Aemond was standing at the basin of water, shirtless, leaning heavily on the stone and wiping the back of his neck while lost in thoughtful contemplation.

"Aemond?" You questioned softly, shutting the door, and rushing for him. "Are you all right?" When in the light, you saw the discoloration of his skin, whispering, "Oh, my love..."

"It's not so bad," he answered in the same lowered tone.

"Liar."

"No, truly, it's not the worst I've had," Aemond straightened up, looking down at you with a soft smirk. "Hi, poppet."

"Hi," you smiled, letting him lean down some as you rocked to your toes to kiss him in greeting. "How was your day?"

"Cole was brutal in training, but it was good," he nodded, dropping the washcloth after wringing it out. "And yours, my love?"

"Well... Your mother's caught rumor of our plans..."

"What's that mean?"

"She directly asked if I mean to go to Pentos and if I mean to take you with me, as if to take you away from her."

"Gods," his eyes rolled, "swear, the walls have ears in this place."

"Tell me of it," your eyes rolled. "I think she's off the scent for now, but we should be more diligent and a little more careful..."

"Hmm," he considered, nodding after. "Yes, love. Right, then."

"Are you hungry?"

"I could eat."

"How about at Kavvin's?"

"In the city?"

You nodded with a grin, "Feelin' up for a game, love?"

Aemond turned to you fully, hands on your hips and a grin on his lips. "Yeah... Yeah, yeah, I could go for something to eat."

"Start there, then," you whispered.

"You've the time it takes me to clean up and change to get out of here," he smirked, forehead on yours.

You dashed around the room to change into a tunic, trousers, boots, and a thick muted-color cloak. Aemond chuckled to himself as you blew him an air kiss before sneaking through secret passage door... And away you went.

Once out of the Keep's grounds, it was easy enough to lose yourself in the city's streets; but kept to the plan and made for Kavvin's tavern. You slipped in and made quick work of finding the young lad, working on sopping up a puddle of ale, and dashing over to him.

"Princess," he chuckled some, eyeing you up and down. "What's it for you tonight, then?"

"Send him down the Street, I wanna see how far he'll go," you smirked some, squeezing his elbow as you slipped him a Gold Dragon as a tip.

"All right," he shrugged. "Want a drink while you wait?"

"Oh, please, you and I both know that man takes the longest fucking strides in the bloody Realm," you laughed a bit, Kavvin nodding in agreement. "If I want to win, I've gotta go."

"Back door's open," he smirked, pointing you off.

In fact, he had to restrain a laugh when not a full five minutes later, Aemond was stalking into the tavern - eye sweeping the area. He decided that for tonight, he was on your side, and made himself busy with other customers to stave off telling Aemond anything.

However, nobody flagged Kavvin down when they noted the hooded man with one eye stalk up to him.

"My Prince," Kavvin greeted softly, tossing the cloth he was using over his shoulder. "You're out late, aren't you?"

"Hardly," Aemond sighed some.

"Well, you will be," the lad smirked.

"Where's she off to?"

Kavvin shrugged, and Aemond slapped a Gold Dragon to his hand. "Uh, think she made mention of... Well, now that I think on it, 's a bit fuzzy, yeah?"

"Where, Kavvin?" Aemond growled, another coin dropped to his hand.

"Hm, yes," he examined the coin, "think she said something about goin' off down the Street, yes?"

"No, she didn't."

"Swear it, honest," Kavvin nodded. "Said she wanted to see how far you'd go tonight. You do somethin' to piss her off, mate?"

"Not that I'm aware of - though, she might think 'twas I who told the Queen of our plans."

"Well, that makes little sense," Kavvin chuckled, "for even I know, the idea to leave this wretched city was your own..."

"She's an easier scape goat for the courts and help to gossip about," Aemond frowned a bit. "The Street, you said?"

"Street of Silk," Kavvin agreed softly, offering a coin back, "honest, that's where she said she was headin'."

Aemond nodded and turned, leaving the bartender with his hand extended; but it quickly recoiled with a smirk as Aemond took leave. After a chuckle, Kavvin thumbed the coin to flip in the air; catching it in a swipe, then turning as he pocketed his extra coins as a few men grew louder and sloshed ale around - leaving Kavvin in for a long night tending his bar.

The Street of Silk was alive tonight, as it was all other nights. Lowly lit torches hung on the walls lined your way; most wearing hoods and darkened colors to hide themselves. Whores and Mistresses hung out of doorways and windows; hollering, snarling, laughing at any passing customer.

You didn't often dare to venture down this way, but tonight was special; you were in it to win. So, you ducked down a darkened alley and knocked three times, in a specific pattern, at the wooden door.

A moment later, it pulled open.

"What're you doin' here?" Tiyana smirked to you, leaning on the doorway. "My brithday or sum'thin'? Here ta treat me, is it?"

"Not tonight, my sweet," you smirked. "Carry a message for me?"

"To who?"

"My husband."

"Ain't no way," she shrugged. "He don't come down this way, no, ma'am. Ain't nobody seen the One-Eyed Prince 'round these parts since - well..."

"Yeah, yes, yes, I know. But he'll come this way, and I need you to catch his eye. Tell him to go by the markets."

"Oh - I get it," she laughed. "You two playin' that game, innit? Yeah? You two li'l freaks, is it?"

"A bit," you mused softly. "Will you do as I've asked?"

"Gonna come back and entertain me a bit?"

Your head cocked, eyeing her up and down, "Perhaps - though, my husband is often insatiable."

"Say that like I haven't eaten his cum out your cunt before, hey?" She smirked. "All right, yeah, fine, I'll tell 'im if he comes ta see me, yeah?"

"You're my favorite for a reason," you smirked, holding your hand out.

"Lady," Tiyana gasped, weighing the gold in her hand. "Th-This is more than I make inna month, it is! What'chu givin' it ta me for?"

"You've always been loyal and discreet," you eased. "Don't fail me tonight, love."

"Wouldn't dream of it," she grinned. "You're a right Gods-sent Lady, you is. I'll tell yah husband what you want - markets, you said?"

"Yeah, the market stalls," you nodded. "Thank you."

"Yeah, yeah, 'course," she smirked, nodding as you pushed off again into the city's streets.

This time, Aemond was slower to arrive on scene. He stood at the mouth of the rambunctious street, eyeing it with malcontent, but something in his stomach solidified and moved him forward. Bad thoughts and haunting memories swarmed Aemond's guts and mind, but still, he let his feet glide down the natural decline.

His eye surveyed the promiscuous activities around him, finding it would be the perfect place to catch you - but then, someone else was catching his eye.

She leaned in a low-bearing window, tits nearly fully popping out of her shirt; eyes rimmed in coal, and hair pulled off her neck. Her eyes ran over his hood and then noted the lack of an eye, motioning him forward. He didn't want to; there had been many who gestured to him all night, but for some reason, this was different... He glanced around, then moved forward.

"She's been to see you, Tiyana?"

"Not without you, Lord," the whore smirked, sitting herself on the window sill. "She's very loyal, that one."

"Being why you're helping her?"

"I'm helpin' yah both!" She laughed. "I want you both ta get laid, hey? So, listen, right? She went down that way," she pointed, "but said meet her in the markets?"

Aemond paused, lifting his gaze slowly. "Down that way?" He asked, pointing down the alley.

"Mhm - took a left, down there," Tiyana pointed, leaning out of the window a bit. "Can I ask something?"

Aemond sighed, glancing around them to the bustle of the drunken crowd. "Sure, what is it?"

"Why's it you two do this? Hey? Just wonderin' - life so bloody boring, you two need sex games?"

Aemond smirked a bit, "More like... We prefer to keep things interesting. You find new ways to get the blood pumping."

"I know a few ways," she smirked.

"I know," he whispered in agreement. "But you know the agreement - not without my wife."

"Wasn't tryna persuade yah, Princey, just wonderin' why yah's do this," she smirked.

"Keeps things... Fresh."

"Hmm," she nodded.

"Think a hunter and prey, yes?"

Tiyana grinned, "Ah, yes, there it is - yeah. All right, fair enough, my Prince. She went that way, but said markets."

"You're a hidden gem," Aemond smirked some, dropping more coins in her hand.

"And you two are me favorite customers," she winked. "Go on, get goin', she's waitin' on yah out there! Fuck 'er good for me, lad! Hey-hey!" She laughed loudly as Aemond pushed off, heading down the alley he was pointed towards.

Slowly, the sounds of the city fell behind him and Aemond noted the way this path took him closer to the water-ways. With a small smirk, he made a judgement call and ducked down a different alley; peering around to slink in the darkness.

Like a bloodhound on the scent after a weakening deer, the pair of you danced around one another; where one ducked into an alley, the other was tip-toeing away. He grew tired of waiting and decided to look around the market like you had said.

It was there in the maze of market stalls that you saw him, smirking as you quickly exchanged your cloak for a different colored one. From there, you picked up an abandoned basket and slunk around the outskirts of the stalls. You kept an eye on Aemond, moving when he did; keeping distance between you but feeling a little frisky.

So, you took a risk, and casually strolled by him as if intent on picking from the plum cart.

He didn't notice you; your eyes watching from under the hood as his tall figure allowed him to peer over heads. Again, you ducked around the few carts and stalls, just watching him for another moment.

Then, you ventured close to the apples... And again, Aemond was too busy glaring at a man who bumped into his shoulder to notice. You took another risk, and dared asking the vendor a question - voice clear on the air. Still, he did not notice.

After another few minutes of watching him turn in confusion, wondering where you could've gone, Aemond started towards the closest tavern - thinking maybe you were hidden in plain sight.

How right he was, but unknowing.

You crept around, exchanging your cloak again before jogging after your husband. However, when you peaked around the doorway of the tavern, you noticed how the white-haired man you loved and adored had effortlessly melted into the crowd, and now, you were back at a disadvantage.

Learning from past mistakes, you quickly turned and let your legs pump with effort to rush away from the markets.

Around a few corners and down two alleyways, you were arriving at the bay port - but only had a moment to recognize your surroundings before a hand clamped over your mouth as another quickly coiled around your middle to pin your arms.

You gasped into the calloused hand, feeling the strong chest slam into your back before forcing you back a few steps. With gritted teeth, you were slammed into the stone wall of one of the darkened alleyways. However, your eyes settled on your 'attacker' and quickly slitted. "Husband," you identified.

"Wife," Aemond smirked. "You're getting predictable, love."

"How'd you know?"

He shrugged, "I felt your eyes on me in the markets and figured I could blend in at the tavern. From there, I knew you'd follow to keep an eye on me, so, I waited, and when I saw you rush away, I took a shortcut."

"Mhm," you hummed, lifting your chin as he leered over you. "I did learn something tonight."

"What's that, my darling?"

"You blend in rather effortlessly when your hair's covered," you muttered as he slowly stepped closer so you were nearly cowering into the brick behind you. "Might do us well, after all... Should we choose to leave..."

Aemond's one hand rose to hold your jaw as the other planted against the wall to corral you to him. "You say that as if my mind's changed."

"Has it?"

"Not in the slightest," he promised, petting his thumb over your lips to catch the bottom one. "Where you go, I go, and away from this wretched fucking city is where I want us to be."

"You'd leave them?" You asked with a smirk. "Leave your family? For me?"

"For my own family?" He corrected, nodding, "Yes, I would've left yesterday if I knew."

"How fucked everything has become?" You whispered sadly, lifting a hand to pet down his collarbone and rest against his pectoral.

"Something like that," he nodded, lifting a knee to separate your legs. "You'd go with me? When the time comes, you'd go with me?"

With a sigh, you nodded, trying not to grind down on his thigh. "Anywhere, my Prince - anywhere you want, we'll go."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah," you all but whimpered as the hand that once caressed your skin then moved to a bruising grip around your neck.

"Hold still," he nodded, "I won, yes?"

"Mhm."

"Then hold still while I claim my prize," he smirked, yanking his dagger from under his cloak and slowly dragging the pointed tip down your stomach. He didn't press hard, instead, dragging it between your skin and the cloth of your trousers. "Good girl," he crooned as he let the dagger's blade slit the seam of your pants.

"Aemond," you glanced up the alley nervously, body nearly trembling from anticipation.

"Shhh," he nodded, leaning in to breath in your scent. One arm wrapped around your waist, the other working to literally cut a slit in your trousers; letting his tongue flatten against your pulse point.

"Aemond," you whimpered, holding onto him tightly.

"Good girl," he purred again, sheathing his dagger and letting his hand drop again to then pet up your dampening slit from outside the cloth of clothing. "Easier, yeah?" He smirked against your ear, breathing deeply as he let his pointer finger push into your heat, praising, "So warm for me. But I need you wetter than this to take you - don't wanna hurt you, pet."

You groaned a little, holding onto him while keeping a leg up his hip. "What if someone sees?" You whispered against his mouth, practically mewling like a bitch in heat.

"Let them," he nodded, "all they'd see is a man, pleasuring his wife." Your breathing subtly changed as his mouth hung over your ear, promising, "Splitting her in two, watching as she takes his cock so fucking well. That's all they'd see, pet."

"Fuck."

"Hmm, fuck you how?" He smirked, letting a second finger join his first. "Want me to bend you over? Fuck you on the floor? Find those barrels back there?"

"Against the wall, want you t'take me against the wall," you nodded, a sheen of sweat slowly forming over your skin. "Wanna feel you in my fuckin' lungs, yeah?"

"Whatever my pretty girl wants, she gets," Aemond growled, slapping your hands off him and readjusting you two. "C'mon, love, earn it - up, jump up, c'mon." When you did, he caught you easily, grunting, "Atta girl. Hang on," he panted then, pressing you against the wall as he adjusted to hold you against the wall while freeing his cock.

"Aemond, please, please," you begged softly, holding his jaw with both hands, "Gods, I need you to fuck me so bad."

"C'mere," he seethed, hoisting you a little higher to adjust his cock at your (cloth-cut) entrance. You both gave guttural moans as he let you sink onto him, grinding your hips into his to better adjust. "Fuckin' grippin' me too tight, love," he growled, hands squeezing your hips as you kept hold of his neck and shoulders.

"Gonna last f'me?"

"Might just have to pump you full, hmm?" He smirked, using his chest to slam into yours and righten your spine. His hand shot up to constrict around your neck, the other used to hold you on his hips; making your legs work overtime to stay atop him.

"Oh, Gods, fuck," you whimpered, hood still over both your heads as Aemond rammed into you.

"Told you - wasn't wet enough," he cursed in your ear.

"Feels fuckin' amazing, please, don't stop," you begged him, hearing his small grunts and growls start up as both hands moved to hold either thigh and keep you spread against the wall. "Oh, my Gods," you sobbed, truly unsure if you were feeling pleasured or not from the feeling of Aemond fucking through you.

"Ah, fuck, fuck," he hissed, hips stuttering as he met his first orgasm.

"Wow... That was record time," you teased quietly when he paused to keep you full to the hilt of his emptying cock.

"I warned yah," he smirked some, readjusting his hold as sweat coated his skin. "My cum just makes you wetter, hey? Yeah, look at that," he hissed, eye cutting down to watch his cock slowly pull back; revealing webs of cum between you and him.

Your hands pawed at his neck, tugging him forward; whining against his mouth, "I need more, please."

He smirked, "Gonna be a good girl and hold it all in until we get back to the Keep?"

You whispered, "What if I can't?"

"I'll just have to fill you again..." His cock twitched, making his throat bob. "Want your belly swollen with our kid, 's 'bout time, isn't it? For the Gods to bless us?"

"Yet you talk of leaving the city - "

"All the more reason," he promised, still holding you spread as he let his hips start up again; rutting into you slowly. "Protect you, protect our kid," he muttered into your neck, "get away from this fucking place - be safe. Be together - oh shit," he moaned.

"Yeah," you grinned, holding him to your neck; clenching your muscles to make him whine, "that's right, emotional intimacy turns you on, doesn't it? Hey?"

"Fuck - yes, yes, it does," he promised, starting to pick up his pace. "Just want you pregnant already, fuck's sake."

"Then fill me," you purred, clenching your teeth when his fully-swollen cock once more stabbed through you. "I wanna make you a Daddy."

"Shit," he breathed, turning his head when he heard noises; but did not stop. Three men and two women stumbled down the alley, drunk, cooing when they saw the couple against the wall.

"Ye-ahhh!" One leered.

"Give it to 'er!" Another hollered.

"Fucking fill me," you followed right after in his ear. "Oh, fuck, yes, please, right there," you hissed as he pinned you harder to the cold stone behind you, the group of five passing with their eyes glued to the pair of you. It was oddly erotic, spurring Aemond on as your mouth hung open in a silent scream.

His balls jackhammered into the wet apex of your cunt as his arms all but braced against you to keep you in place. You were moldable, you were limp, you were taunt with pleasure at the same time; you were a twitching, moaning mess when feeling returned to your limbs as his thumb found your clit.

"Take it, I know my girl can take it," Aemond growled, humping up into you to create friction at that special, gummy spot on your inner walls. "Oh, so fuckin' good, just take it, my precious girl," he praised, hearing the group still stumbling about at the other end of the alley.

"Why don't you fuck me like that?" One of the girls growled in annoyance.

"I can't hold yah like tha', by the Gods," her partner laughed.

Your hand slapped outward against the stone when your husband rubbed your clit in time with his thrusts; letting his mouth open slightly to bite at your shoulder and encourage you to do the same.

You came with a cry, mouth full of his shoulder's flesh; rolling your hips into his with your booted heels pressing into the meat of his arse as waves of pleasure rippled across your beings. Aemond wasn't far behind and when his cock was almost strangled by the clenching of your walls, he came for a second time.

It was enough for you both, panting in effort as your legs were numb. Aemond slowly pulled out of you, hearing you stutter to breath as his cum instantly pumped out to drip onto the pavement beneath you.

"Gods," Aemond breathed in shock, watching the puddle slowly grow.

"Ah!" You yelped when he lowered you, and your legs gave way; his arms darting out to instantly cling onto you as the back of your head thumped into the wall.

"Shit, love, all right?" His hand pressed to the tender spot as you pouted some. The group that watched had since passed, leaving you alone again with split trousers that grew wetter from the ooze of cum. Aemond was trying to catch his breath and support you at the same time, readjusting your clothes for you best he could. "Got it, love?"

"Can't feel my bloody legs," you complained lightly.

"C'mere, I've got you," he promised, arms tight around your waist. "Did good tonight, pet."

"But I lost?"

"'S not about winning or losing, in the end, we both reap benefits, yes?" You nodded. "And as you said, tonight gave you reassurance we could blend in across the Narrow Sea, did it not?"

"It did," you agreed. "But I want to wait until next month, I want to know if it's stuck."

"I'll fuck you everyday until then, yes? Breed you, like I know you want me to," he smirked, one arm holding you up to walk in front of him as the other fingered down the crack of your arse. "Keep walking, don't make a scene," he whispered in your ear, pushing his fingers into your cunt as you lead the way through King's Landing. It wasn't the most comfortable, but Aemond made it doable; pausing in another alleyway to push your chest to the stone wall.

"Aemond," you cursed his name into the wall brushing your cheek.

"Easy," he chuckled, nudging your feet apart. "Take me once more and I'll carry you home."

"Aemond?" You reared back a little when his hardened cock pushed into you again.

"What do you need?"

Your hand raised to pet over his cheek, back bowed to hold yourself up and keep him inside you. "Make me a Mommy, please," you whispered, earning a sharp slap to your arse cheek before his hands seized control of your hips.

"Hold it in this time, then," he teased, starting to thrust into you like a wild horse; bucking his hips into yours to create ripples across your flesh. It seemed as if your frantic motions in the middle of the alley deterred anyone from turning down it, leaving a brief moment of privacy in the sweltering city night.

One of his hands slithered up your front to fondle your breast, tweaking a nipple until you were nearly collapsing into the wall. Aemond had to hold you slightly as you bent lower, almost desperate to take him to the hilt as you fucked back against him - and he took full advantage of your new position.

Aemond kept his feet with your own, hands on your hips; thrusting harder into you as sweat beaded on his skin to roll down his pearly flesh. "Fuck, Gods be fucking good," he cursed, "how's it you're this tight, still? Hey?"

You whimpered wordlessly, gasping when one of Aemond's thumbs came to gently rim around your puckered hole. He didn't often let himself explore your arse, but sometimes, to catch you off guard, he liked testing your limits. After making him venture down the Street of Silk by himself, he figured a little payback was in order.

A stranger started down the alley and actually paused to watch the pair of you, Aemond's spit being spat from his mouth onto your holes; winking in the distant moonlight.

"Take it," Aemond growled when your legs gave way, and sent you both careening into the dirty floor. It only spurred him on further.

"Don't stop," the stranger recommended, loosening his breeches to take his cock out and pump himself to life.

Aemond, fully enraptured with the feel of your cunt, let his hand latch onto the back of your neck to hold you in place as he thrust harder, harder, harder into you. Your hips bruised from the way he pounded you into the cobblestone, growling as he glanced at the stranger.

"Oh, shit," the man nodded, pumping faster. "Yeah - look me in the eyes, mate, that's it."

"The fuck?" You whispered, glancing up to watch.

"Eyes on him, Princess," Aemond demanded, fully hunched over you as he felt his stomach's coil tighten; informing you, "almost there, precious girl, keep bein' a good fuckin' girl - oh, ah fuckin' Hell!"

"Oh, yeah," the stranger nodded. "Can I cum on her, mate?"

"You wanna die?" Aemond snapped.

"Lemme use her mouth," the stranger complained, head tossed back and eyes screwed shut. "Betta yet, lemme a turn!"

Aemond gasped behind you, stalling his hips into the meat of your bum while letting his cock pump you full of his seed. He recovered much quicker than you, kissing your temple as he unsheathed himself from your velvet warmth to stand, tuck himself away, and stride up to the man still masturbating to the sight of your swollen, dripping cunt.

"Woah - hang on - wait, wait, wait!" The man gasped as Aemond stabbed him non-fatally in the ribs.

"Go - before I decide I need your life for even looking at her," he sneered, shoving the man away while yanking his dagger free. A splatter of blood echoed in-between your heaving breaths.

When he turned back, he smirked at the sight of you; fucked-out and unable to find your feet, limp on the dirt-riddled cobblestone. "You didn't have to do that," you told him softly when he neared you to adjust what was left of the tatters of your clothes.

"I did," he smirked. "C'mere, up yah get. Think my wife's earned a hot bath, don't you?"

"Will you join me?" You asked, letting him lift you bridal style. The cloak was long enough that when he picked you up, it covered your cum-soaked hole in his arms.

"I can't resist you, pet," he frowned, "we wouldn't be doin' much cleaning, hey?"

"So?" You smirked, arms tight around his neck. "I want to make you a Daddy, Aemond, best we... Do our due diligence, yes?"

"You make a fair point, Princess," he smirked. "If you can handle it, I'll fuck you the rest of the night, yes?"

"I'm an orgasm behind," you reminded softly as he chose a lesser-used secret entrance into the Red Keep.

"Hm, yes, I seem to owe you one," he smirked in agreement. "Better stay awake, then."

requesting rules and masterlist

HOTD masterlist

[mawrrbid]

I've been working on these two guys since yesterday, and I am having the most fun I ever had in a while.

Both of them are highly inspired by Yaelokre's aesthetic, "Wolf" also having some inspiration from Vessel, Sleep Token's singer.

They don't have name yet (just referencing to them as Lamb & Wolf for now), nor story, but I do have few things settled down.

Feel free to keep reading if you want to see me ramble about OCs that are not even fully fleshed out yet.

I mostly have design drafts in my sketchbook. Most of them of Lamb because he was the first one I came up with, along with one digital draft for their colors.

The main idea was to keep them simple so I could eventually cosplay them someday for funsies, but alas, brain is screaming to me to make them more detailed, so I will have to revise their design.

Wolf's first draft was on digital, and I hate it so bad. I did it at 1 a.m after playing for few hours online with friends, my brain was just NOT there.

I hate the colors, I hate the clothes, I hate everything. I actually had their design idea BEFORE Lamb. It was supposed to go in a complete different direction and be a lot more based of Vessel. So I just, did a 180° turn and completely changed the direction of what I wanted to do with them, which kind of lost me in the process of designing them, I didn't even know what kind of aesthetic I wanted to go for with them kjhjkkj.

But I picked up my sketchbook, and managed to pull something that I like a lot more.

As I mentioned, I do not have a set up story for them, but they are basically the whole "appearance can be deceiving" trope.

In short, I just want people to sit in front of them, and wonder who's the real monster. Is it the clearly not human one who looks like they could rip you appart, or the one with the sweet smile & innocent demeanor? Who knows?...

I wanna work more on them, but I am running out of steam since I've been working on them for like... Almost a full day?? So will take a break, probably gather some more references, make moodboard and color palette. Because even tho I have kind of solid idea on what colors I want Lamb to be, I have NO idea which colors I'm gonna give to Wolf. Wanted them to be kind of complementary, Lamb blue and Wolf red, but red doesn't look good on Wolf no matter how hard I try so I'm gonna have to do more test on that matter kjhjk.

Anyway, I don't know why I felt the need to do that super ass long post. I feel like people follow me here mostly for Touchstarved content. But I kind of wanted to ramble about something else for once.

I also don't often share my thought process whenever I create OCs from scratch, but I thought it could be interesting??? Porbably not, it's mostly just me rambling heh.

Sorry for all potential typos, I am not fully awake while writing that, and my ADHD is like, off to the roof lately.

ALSO, if you have name ideas for these two, please lmk!! I'd love to hear your suggestion. 🙏

[dragonmarquise]

Silly BRC Headcanons: Heights!

The hyperfixation continues, here's some heights for some of the BRC characters. Mainly did this since I am planning to do more proper arts of some of the characters later, so I wanted to have a solid idea for some of their heights now. And then I ended up doing heights for all of them actually, lol

Red is supposedly around 180 cm in canon? At least that's what I've seen a few people say. I'm assuming it was some sort of calculation using the in-game model. Even if that's not the case, I'm accepting it as my headcanon anyways, and used that height for Red as a baseline for the rest of these.

Also I decided that I wanted Red to be the shortest of BRC and even the gangs in general, with the Flesh Prince being the only one shorter than that. Because why the hell not, these are headcanons, not like anyone can stop me. :P

Though in doing so, I realized I ended up making just about everyone very tall. Oh well! :u

I'm putting these in cm, but also with very approximate feet-inches for convenience of anyone who doesn't want to convert these over! That being said, I'd consider the cm heights to be more accurate/specific.

Starting off with BRC:

Red = 180 cm / 5' 10"

Tryce = 186 cm / 6' 1"

Bel = 182 cm / 5' 11"

Vinyl = 184 cm / 6' 0"

Solace = 181 cm / 5' 11"

Rise = 185 cm / 6' 1"

Rietveld = 186 cm / 6' 1"

Felix = 182 cm / 5' 11" (essentially, I'm imagining Red is only slightly shorter because he has Faux's body. Clearly, Pretty Boy should've eaten more veggies, loool)

The rest of the crew in my mind are somewhere in the range of 181 cm to 185 cm, I just can't decide on specific numbers for them right now. ^^;

I am making DJ Cyber 188 cm / 6' 2" because honestly, he really does give me that vibe of being taller than most of the other characters. :P

Then there's Devil Theory (see here for a quick who's-who in my headcanons of them, lol):

Sai = 193 cm / 6' 4"

Daishō = 187 cm / 6' 2"

Bō = 183 cm / 6' 0"

Nunchaku = 185 cm / 6' 1"

I imagine all of DOT EXE being different heights as well, basically being whatever height they had before going full-cyber. Cueball is around 190 cm / 6' 3", and is the median height of the group. I'll have to decide on the others later, sorry. :u

As mentioned, the Flesh Prince is the shortest one, I assigned him to 167 cm / 5' 5". Which is just short compared to the rest of these character, that's still fairly tall compared to the average person. But most importantly, it means I still get to be taller than him by like one or two centimeters, mwahaha!! >:D

The rest of the Franks are probably like, around 200 to 202 cm? Roughly 6' 7". I looked it up, the average heights for basketball players in the NBA right now is around 6' 6", so that sounds about right for them imo.

Eclipse are all around 195 cm / 6' 5" in my mind. Tall ladies! And then the rest of FUTURISM are between 181 cm and 185 cm like the rest of BRC.

Bonus, Escher gets to be 195 cm / 6' 5" too, his in-game model is definitely a good chunk taller than the player models. Hopefully the tall man returns from his bus trip soon. :P

[chadillacboseman]

Shore Leave

Part of @autumnleaves1991-blog 's Writer Wednesday challenge using the picture above!

Characters used:

OCs by: @roofgeese @the-black-dragon-clan @obsess-much and myself!

Other MK Black Dragon characters: Kabal, Erron Black

--

"The beach?" Echo was incredulous, staring at Alex with her mouth slightly agape.

Alex nodded excitedly and pointed at the map on the wall, his finger resting over the location of a nearby beachfront. They were due some "shore leave" as Kano so often called it, and they had all been debating on how they wanted to spend it.

"I don't do beaches," Erron shook his head and folded his arms over his chest defiantly.

"You mean you don't have a waterproof cowboy hat?" Echo chided.

"And I'm sure you wouldn't be caught dead in a bikini, sugar."

"I think it's a good idea!" Kate piped up from her spot in the corner, "We could all be normal for a day!"

"There is nothin' normal about any of you," Erron growled.

"Pot, meet kettle," Kabal sneered, and the cowboy rolled his eyes.

Despite his size, Alex was capable of some of the most convincing puppy-dog eyes you ever did see, and they were on in full force as he pleaded with the rest of the team.

A few scattered mutters of "fine" and defeated sighs filled the room as Alex got his way and giddily pumped his fists in the air.

--

"This ain't right," Erron muttered from inside the changing room off of the parking area. The curtain was drawn as he changed out of his cowboy getup and into the swim trunks that Alex had insisted he buy.

"It can't be that bad, come on," Echo leaned against the outside wall, her own body covered by a large towel slung over her swimsuit-clad frame.

Erron shoved the curtain aside and Echo bit her lip to choke back a laugh- the cowboy looked awkward, as if he didn't know how to stand without his usual get-up and guns. His face and forearms were tan from plenty of exposure to the beating of the Outworld sun, but that was where the color ended- the rest of his body was white as a sheet.

"You better not be about to laugh," he narrowed his eyes and Echo shook her head innocently.

"Wouldn't dream of it."

"Jesus, Erron, when's the last time you saw the sun?" Kabal called from his lawn chair at the edge of the water, "Shades on, everybody, Casper is here."

"I'm gonna kill him-"

"Calm down, old man," Echo murmured, "You look fine." She tossed her towel to the sand and Erron's eyes lingered on her figure until she turned and he averted his gaze quickly.

"This was a great idea!" Kate flopped down on her towel and sighed, "Beats paperwork any day!"

"Headed for the water?" Kabal glanced over the top of his sunglass at Erron.

"Oh no, hell no. I got the trunks on, but I ain't touchin' the water."

"You can't swim, can you?" Kabal grinned up at the cowboy from his seat, "180 years old and you never learned to dog-paddle?"

"Now you shut your goddamn-"

"You can't, can you?" Kate interjected, and Erron felt as if he was going to short-circuit.

"Why am I the focus here when you," he jerked his head at Kabal, "look like a steak someone left on the griddle? And you-" he gestured at Agnes, "are still wearin' your chef coat?"

Agnes peered over the top of the novel she had been engrossed in and raised her eyebrows, "I don't believe I've said a fucking word to you, Mr. Black."

"Sorry, Nessie-" Erron moved to tip his hat before remembering he no longer had one on with an exasperated sigh.

"Just get in the water, cowboy!" Alex called; he was flat on his back, floating gently atop the water a few meters from shore.

Erron huffed and shifted his weight uncomfortably. It wasn't that he couldn't swim- he just wasn't very good at it. The last time he'd had a proper swim was back in 1902, and he was a bit more spry then.

"I'll get in if you get in," Echo nudged Erron gently in the ribs and he pinched the bridge of his nose in frustration.

"Fine, damn it."

The others watched as Echo ran, gracefully, and dove headfirst into the surf while Alex cheered and pumped his fist.

"I hate this," Erron muttered as he approached the water, "Join a mercenary clan, Erron! You'll see the world! Do fun shit. This ain't fun-"

The cowboy extended a foot, hesitantly, and touched his toes to the water, "That's fuckin' freezin'!" He withdrew his foot and stood, awkwardly, like a flamingo on one leg.

Alex burst into a fit of laughter and Echo tried to suppress a smile of her own. From the shore, Kabal heckled and jeered while Kate shook her head.

"Just jump in!"

"Shut up, Demir- I'm thinkin'."

"Think faster, Kate is about to pull out her phone and record you," Echo jerked her head toward the shore and Erron squeezed his eyes shut in frustration.

"Do it quick!" Alex shouted, "Like a bandaid!"

And so Erron took a deep breath and ran, headlong, into the cold waves, hitting the water with a gasp.

"Jesus that's cold as hell!" His voice was an octave or two higher than he intended as he spoke.

Kabal and the others cheered from the shore and Agnes even gave a thumbs up from under her umbrella.

Echo floated over to Erron as he shivered and treaded water, trying desperately to keep his composure.

"Not too bad, cowboy."

[fictional-worlds-are-exquisite]

agajsksns not gonna lie being 10 feet tall sounds awesome. i have no idea how tall that is because the only thing i know about feet (that sounds so wrong) is that google is telling me that i'm 5'6 (sorry to disappoint). which is. average height right? well it doesn't feel like it coz my best friends are giants. they're both 180+ cm tall and they constantly make fun of me for being short. but honestly i win because i can always make them reach things for me.

thank you! that's very sweet, i actually only saw your reply like 20 minutes before the new year so it was right on time! i loved writing to you and waiting to hear back as well, you're a really fun person to talk to!

i know you probably won't see this for a couple of weeks before going on holiday, but have fun!

i laughed really hard at the picture my brain conjured up when reading about you dropping the vampire act and starting to pretend to be a mouse, just straight up scurrying up to the houses on all fours in a bathrobe is hilarious. i'd pay to see that. and yeah! me either. the number of times i've gone outside at night is probably like 3. that's counting that time when i went for ice cream at 11pm to the store on the other side of the street in my pajamas and then had to turn back because it apparently closes at 10 pm. that was a pretty big disappointment

a halloween themed birthday party sounds awesome! it's sort of disappointing though that you can barely remember it. the only themed birthday party i had (or at least the only one that i remember) was princess themed because i was on my princess faze back then (i was 5 or 6 i think). i still remember the sheer joy i felt at being able to wear a long fancy dress. it was brilliant

oh yeah! i'm still slightly scared of blenders because of that time. now anytime i even put my fingers close to the blade i unplug it first. also i saw you got a blender? i think we have one that's similar to the one you described. so i have a couple of suggestions! i like to make banana "ice cream". you just cut up a banana into pieces and freeze it, (i have no idea how long it takes to freeze i just generally always have frozen bananas in my freezer) then you take them out, let them sit for 10 minutes (to not break the blender when you use it) and blend them. i sometimes add frozen berries or peanut butter too! depending on what i want that day. it's great, especially because i'm slightly lactose intolerant too and i absolutely love ice cream. you can also make smoothies as you said. i usually put in mine whatever fruit we have, generally apples, bananas and oranges or grapefruits. or if i'm making one for breakfast (which i know you can't, but this is just a generally more filling option i think?) i also add spinach. you can't really feel the taste but it's supposed to be good for you and it fills you up more (it does make the smoothie super green though!). but yeah i pretty much just mix and match anything i have! also: milkshakes. ice cream, berries (optional) and milk! super easy and my little cousins love it when they visit!

ohhh your grater also seems to be out to get you. i bet it's really painful if it actually falls on your feet, because like metal. on foot. ouch. especially if it hits you with a corner! and i would definitely also get surprised every time it happened no matter how many times it did! bifocal glasses do not sound fun either tho. i would constantly forget how to use them and probably would just get headache really fast too! i get a headache from my normal glasses when i wear them (i usually wear contacts) so bifocal ones would be even worse i bet.

exactly. i had no idea what "hot" means. i thought you were supposed to use it when you thought a person was aesthetically pleasing? or like you thought they look cute? i dunno. i used it a couple of times before i realised that was not what that meant and then i was just like uhhhh yeah i'm gonna delete that word from my vocab. yeah! i think that ace and probably aro too are pretty hard to figure out because it's the lack of something.

ahahsksns i can imagine tiny Lindsey waking up on Christmas morning and running to the window expecting snow in the middle of summer and it's so funny! i can't say anything though because we have this saying in lithuanian which is used essentially when someone does something unexpected and unusual for them so you say "it's gonna snow tomorrow". as in "wow, [name] did [something super unexpected from them], it must be snowing tomorrow" (because like those are equally unexpected things i guess? but it's said in winter too so it's just something you say whenever, i'm sorry it's hard to explain!) but yeah a figure of speech. and anytime i heard that, even in the middle of summer, the next morning i'd run to my window and look for snow and when there was none, i'd just stare accusatorily at my parents. like wow, i can't believe you lied/let someone lie to me

horse races sound fun, i've never been to one though! and a picnic luch sounds awesome! i love picnics but we have them very rarely, i definitely think we should have them more often

and yeah, i get that acid reflux more of an annoyance than a problem but still! i completely agree with you about peanut butter though. it's amazing, i could eat it everyday

I know exactly how tall 10 feet is purely because I’m 5 foot so two of me is 10 foot. I barely know feet but I got used to people being confused when I was like oh, I’m 155cm! so I learnt what my height was in feet but I can really only visualise heights when I put them into centimetres. Someone can be like I’m 6 foot! and that’s great but I don’t have the faintest idea how tall that actually is. 182cm on the other hand is easy. that’s just like one ruler above my height. I can picture that. 5 foot 6 is probably average but as a short person, I consider you tall. That really isn’t saying much at my height but still sdflshdfks. Biggest benefit of tall best friends is indeed making them reach high things though. 

And now we’re almost three weeks into the new year. Time seems to be flying this year. This is a very late reply indeed sdfjhskdfs. I did see this before I left but didn’t have time to reply, thank you though! I did have lots of fun. I had some birds try to invade the unit up in Orewa and I had a dotterel (I think) follow me along the beach at Ngarimu Bay playing some sort of red light green light game with me (it only moved closer and started following me again when I looked away) and I think a blackbird started some sort of mating performance at me which was flattering but uhhhh I’m a bit of a big bird mate. Maybe choose someone else. there was also beaches and gorgeous views etc etc but birds, y’know. birds.

i would 100% do that for money with no regrets. on one hand I could get a job and contribute to society. on the other hand I could do that as my main income. not a hard choice. hire me by the hour to freak your family and friends out. i have no respect for myself i’ll do it to anyone for the right price. damn. only closed one hour earlier. that’s a massive disappointment. i was out at night willingly for my high school prom and for a creative writing night at my uni and inside a car if that counts when I think my family was travelling back from the south island when I was younger. So three times that come to mind. Oh. And if stupid camp burma trails count then add a few times to that but those were not night outings I did willingly.

I can barely remember most of my life, I just assume it happened and I wasn’t just planted here at 12 years old as an alien spy. Anything’s possible though. I remember my birthday cakes more than my birthday parties to be honest with you. My mum always made the cake and when I was young she’d make fun designs. A bee, a bat, a swimming pool and a cat come to me off the top of my head. They were mostly just sponge cats but she cut them and iced them expertly. A princess-themed party seems like a very fun type of party for kids who like that. Kids always seem very happy to dress up in pretty dresses and cool outfits to attend those kinds of parties. I can imagine the joy. I know my little cousin looooves that sort of thing, and her brother isn’t willing to be left out either

thank god you unplug it first now sdfjhsdf that’s incredibly reassuring. Ooo thank you for those suggestions!!! this is great!! I was wanting to try something with bananas and that sounds easy enough. I had an apple and feijoa smoothie while I was away on holiday and all I want is another one of those. So I’m very very very interested in trying out fruit smoothies now because they seem like they can be very very tasty. Spinach seems like such an odd thing to add but I’ve heard that several times now so clearly it’s a thing. I don’t think I’ve ever even had spinach. I’ll keep it in mind though. I suppose if I just try whatever fruit we have on hand eventually I’ll get something that tastes good. I have dairy free ice cream and dairy free milk so it seems like this could work out for me in a way where I’m not regretting my entire life. Normally when I go near a milkshake I regret the day I was born.

It isn’t a super heavy grater but I have intense survival instincts every now and then so it hasn’t actually hit my foot yet. I go diving in the other direction. But I think if it did I’d probably curse a few times before moving on with my life. I don’t think it’d be THAT bad. But I live in fear regardless. oh no. do your normal glasses have a slightly wrong prescription or is this just a thing that happens when you normally wear contacts,,, I’ve never worn contacts because I fear touching my squishy eyeball and also I think my shitty eyesight is too awkward for contacts so I have no idea if that’s a thing.

oh yes haha hot has been solidly deleted from my vocab for many years except in terms of temperature. It has a word that has never naturally come to mind and I’m sure it never will. It just seems weird when I use it. 

I was a fool of a child and absolutely nothing has changed there! I mean I know how hemispheres work now but I’m still a dumbass at heart. Hahahahahaha oh nooooo. That’s incredible but oh noooo. I get what you mean by the saying though, that’d make a lot of sense here honestly since it never snows ever. Locally, at least. 

i think horse races are just a form of betting and losing money that is frowned upon less than actual buildings based on gambling and such. I mean I only ever attended those ones, idk if all horse races are like that, but I know there was buying tickets for whatever horse you thought would win, and if they did you got money, if they didn’t you lost money. I don’t think it was a whole lot of money ? just like a few bucks ? but maybe you could choose to bet more ? I really don’t remember how it worked, I just remember accidentally finding a ticket on the ground and handing it in only to receive some money because the horse won. I think it was like 5 or 10 bucks which seemed like a LOT to my kid self. picnic lunches are fun though. my family keeps a tartan blanket in the back of the car that we use whenever we have picnics and also whenever we get takeaways (we put it in the middle of the lounge floor as the rest of my family eats fish and chips and I eat sushi, normally). But we don’t have as many as we used to. They are fun though.

can confirm i do eat peanut butter everyday and it goes brilliantly.

[jzixuans]

Hey, I've been feeling down recently and was wondering if you had any Logince headcannons. Platonic or romantic work, whichever you feel more comfortable with. Sorry if I'm bothering you.

aw lad don’t worry about bothering me i’m glad to share some headcanons ! i hope you feel better soon!

now, might i interest you in some childhood friends-to-enemies-to-friends-to-lovers logince? [PREPARE FOR A LONG ASS BULLET FIC I’M SO SORRY (google docs says it’s 4.2k words oh my god)]

they’ve known each other since the first grade because oh my god they were neighbours

they were the kind of childhood friends that were aware of each other’s presence and they hung out a little on the playground and worked on group projects but they didn’t really click

there WERE occasions tho where their parents would sit them down together for play dates bc one or more of said parents were Occupied with Important Adult Stuff

and since this was way back when they were wee lil smols, they were hyperactive lil children

so they played lots of adventure games, lots of role-playing, play fighting, that kind of stuff (twas often the dashing daring prince accompanied by his wise magickal advisor)

okay, so maybe they did click, but only a little (so they say)

they liked most of the same stuff, reading, learning, doing stuff with all that knowledge in those big brains of theirs, and that was pretty much the base of their close-but-not-that-close-friendship

and then they got older, and as all kids do, they started prioritizing different things

logan still loved learning and applying that knowledge, but it was more of a ‘learn and apply what knowledge can make you really successful’ and that was how he found his love of science

for roman, it was more of a ‘take what you’ve learned and use it to create your own path to success’ because he planned to go into music and theatre

as a result of this, both boys were exceptional students, except logan cared maybe a little too much about the academics and roman not enough

as the years went by, logan threw himself into studying, making schedules and routines so that he could make sure he knows what he needs to know and maybe a little bit more on the side, who cares if he lost an hour of two of sleep?

roman just learned to go with the flow, so he took everything in stride, took in what he needed, left the rest, and focused on his art instead, even if he’s started to grow an unhealthy apathy to school

and maybe logan falls just short of perfect on his tests, and he looks over and roman has glowing one hundreds in red ink on his

logan looks back down at his and the teacher has written ‘Think outside the box!’

meanwhile logan answers every question in class with scary accuracy, beaming with pride whenever the teacher praises him, and after school that same day roman gets pulled aside with an ‘I know you’re smart, so why don’t you want to put in the work?’

of course logan’s parents wonder why his grades don’t match his progress work, and roman’s parents wonder how he can spend all his time singing and dancing and still come out with high nineties (“is he cheating?”)

and the two have been drifting apart enough as it was, but now they kind of hate each other because ‘why can’t i just be more like him?’

logan starts hating roman because ‘he doesn’t even CARE, how is he doing better than me?’ (part of him misses the days when roman cared so much about anything and everything)

roman starts hating logan because ‘he’s so stiff and condescending, why can’t he just be happy for me?’ (and part of him misses when logan would so willingly stand by his side as his faithful warlock advisor)

so naturally, competition just kind of,,,, grows between them, until they’re constantly at each other’s throats and everyone else watching the shitshow go down has absolutely no idea where the hell all this animosity came from

at this point logan has a new friend in virgil fray and roman has befriended patton hart (virgil and patton know not to bring up the boys’ ‘rivalry’)

of course, being neighbours, they can’t exactly escape each other, and their rooms are adjacent to each other’s (they used to just lean out their windows and talk side by side, but they haven’t in yEARS)

so it’s nearing summer, and it’s hot out so roman’s working on his homework with the window open when he hears this cry of frustration, the angry pushing back of a chair, and the throwing open of the door

his first thought is one of smug satisfaction knowing that logan is dealing with school worse than he is, but then a flash of black catches his eye underneath his window

he makes it to the window just in time to see logan hop the fence in his backyard, and that only means one thing: he’s going to the old park behind their houses

neither of them have touched that park in ages

roman is Intrigued™, so he caps his pen, turns off his lamp and tells his parents he’s going for a walk before dashing out the back door

when he gets to the park, logan’s somehow managed to climb on top of the roof of the play structure

and roman ain’t slick so he just stands at the bottom and yells up to him

and logan is Lost In Thought so he nearly falls off (lbr roman thought it was funny)

“what are you doing here?”

“well excuse me, suck-rates, i happened to notice that you weren’t doing too hot and wanted to see if you were okay.”

“like you’ve ever cared.”

“woah there, is blink 180-ew rubbing off on you?” 

“lay off of him.”

“alright, alright, fine. forgive me for checking in on you.”

“you have a horrible way of showing people that you care, then.”

“well you have a horrible way of being a good friend.”

it just kind of,,,, slipped out, and now both boys are Oh Shit

but both boys are also not the type to back down from their feelings so they kind of have the Silent Stare-Off of Stubborness

roman decides to be the bigger person (bc any chance to one-up logan) and cave first 

“so uh, what’s been bothering you?” (psh you thought he was gonna apologize first? not yet fam)

logan rolls his eyes bc this asshole amirite, but he wants to vent and this is probably his best opportunity to tell roman what’s really been bugging him

“i don’t know how you manage to do it.” 

“do what?”

“do so well in school! you don’t even try!” and damn dude that one stings because he sounds exactly like his parents and every other teacher

“so you’re angry because you’re jealous that i’m better than you at everything.”

“that’s not what i meant and you know it.”

“i’ll have you know that i do try.”

“but you don’t care.”

“about school.”

“what?”

“i mean yeah, sure, i don’t care about school that much because i don’t really need it to go into music or theatre, but i still do my work.”

“but―”

“don’t you dare say anything about my grades because you know damn well that you’re smarter than me.”

“am not―”

“besides, weren’t you the one that told me in the fifth grade that ‘grades don’t mean shit’? my my, what a foul mouth for ten-year-old logan crane.”

“shut up.”

“nah.”

and by now logan’s decided that roman’s probably not going to rip his head off so he climbs down to stand beside him

and maybe the sun is setting bc i’m a classy romantic

and they’re having a Soft Quiet Moment

“…please don’t tell me that school was the only reason why u hated me.”

“… why did you hate me?” smh lo you’ve got to stop deflecting

“…”

“are you kidding me.”

“YOU STARTED IT”

“what no you did shut up”

and wOw now it’s awkward so 

“oh would you look at that, it’s getting late, my parents are gonna think that i’m slacking again, better go. good talk let’s do this again sometime okay byee” and whoop roman just zooms off

and logan realizes that maybe roman’s life isn’t as perfect as he makes it out to be

but too late roman’s gone and he doesn’t want to look like he’s following him so he waits a good half hour before trekking back home

logan doesn’t finish his homework that night because he’s too busy rethinking the past many many years

the next day, he’s frantically trying to cram his work in during his lunch period

virgil takes one look at him and he says “dude, are you okay?”

“no”

“cool, let me know if i can do anything to help.” and maybe it’s a cold answer but logan and virgil are cold edgy people so that’s just how they do

after like twenty minutes virgil takes out his earbuds like “you haven’t complained or sent one angry glare in roman’s direction what the fuck is up kyle”

“i’m just…. stressed.”

virgil, externally: “yeah of course i feel u dude.”

virgil, internally: “i’ve seen you start a project at 3am the morning it was due without breaking a sweat but go off i guess.”

skip to later that night, logan finished his shit (he needed a distraction from the Roman Crisis) so he leans out his window for some Fresh Summer Night Air

and oho would you look at that roman had that sa m e  i d ea

but it’s one of those clear nights where you can actually see the stars and logan just got roman off his mind so he’s a lil distracted

but of course roman notices and now that they’ve gotten some of their ‘rivalry’ out of the way, he remembers how much logan loved to drag him out to the park as late as they were allowed to stay up to watch the stars, and logan looks so at peace here (he’s only really seen logan’s angry face recently)

roman wants to say something, because part of him really wants to make up with logan

but before he can work up the courage he’s interrupted by his mom calling him

“roman! are you done all your work?”

“yeah, mom! almost!”

“you better be going to sleep early tonight!”

and roman is about to duck back inside before he gets yelled at even more but oh no too late logan’s already noticed and now he’s staring at him

“uh, hey.”

“hi.”

“are you, uh, are you feeling better?”

“for the most part, yes.”

“that’s good. look, uh, i gotta go, but i’ll see you at school?”

“oh, right, yes. good night, roman.”

“night, lo.”

roman falls back into his room with a crash because ‘oh my god why was that more nerve-wracking than any performance i’ve ever done?”

logan sinks back against his wall with a sigh because ‘is roman avoiding me now?’

the next day at school the two actually say hi to each other in the hallway and it’s like the entire world stops moving. students are staring and whispering, virgil and patton exchange looks, and logan and roman only just now realize how big their rivalry had gotten

the two lock eyes and burst into laughter because something as simple as a passing greeting in the hallway has turned the school on its head

and the rest of the school has absolutely no idea what just happened when the two part ways, virgil and patton trailing behind them, dumbfounded

they catch each other on the way home, though they walk in silence

that night, they’re back at their windows, side by side once more, and they exchange small talk

a couple weeks later, exams are coming up around the corner and both boys are stressed out of their minds

logan’s still working well past midnight when he hears the old creak of roman’s window opening

“i see your lamp. are you still up?” he hears roman whisper, and maybe it’s the late hour, but his voice is hoarse and wobbly, and logan is most certainly not used to hearing that

“that’s a ridiculous question, of course i’m still up,” logan replies, still not looking up from his computer because his history final project is due in two days

except roman doesn’t reply, and all he can hear from his direction is shaky laughter, and then a wet sniff

“of course i’m ridiculous. it’s not like i’m smart or anything.”

“what?”

“if i were smart i wouldn’t’ve procrastinated this english paper and i could probably be getting some sleep right now,” roman continues like he forgot that logan was there

“roman―“

“and sure, i can do other stuff, but it’s not like it matters or anything, not to my mom, or mr. schmitt, or you―”

“roman!”

roman’s babbling stops and logan worries that he’s scared him off until he looks up and sees roman leaning halfway out his window and now logan’s worried that roman’s going to fall out and break his neck on his patio

roman’s eyes are red and his nose is rubbed raw from crying. his usually-perfectly-coiffed hair is messy and greasy from running his hands through it, his clothes are rumpled, and his grip on the windowsill is trembling

yet he’s still half out the window, eyes comically wide, and logan can’t help but shake his head at how big a dork he is

“i’m sorry.”

roman’s so startled that his elbows buckle and he barely manages to land back in his room so he doesn’t fall (didn’t expect logan to apologize first, didya?)

he’s barely back out the window when logan starts talking again

“i shouldn’t have dismissed you so quickly. you are intelligent and you are capable and you absolutely didn’t deserve any of my anger or bitterness or hatred. for that, i’m sorry.”

roman is, SHOCKED, to say the least. when they were kids, usually it was roman who apologized first, if at all, logan only after being prompted to by parents or teachers (which might’ve contributed to their drifting apart)

“i’m― thank you.” 

there’s a pause because it’s late and logan is really really bad at this

“i’m sorry, too. i only really hated you because everyone kept comparing us. that wasn’t really fair of me.”

“i guess not.”

“so i guess we both agree that we’re both assholes.”

“essentially.”

“cool.”

“what were you going to talk to me about?” and roman has an ‘oh yeah’ because he completely forgot what he came out here for

“i guess i just missed doing this.”

“i did too.”

and they’re not completely in the clear, because they have years of hurt to clean up, but in that moment, they just sit and talk, and maybe missing one assignment amongst a whole year of perfect grades won’t hurt

they’re butts tired in the morning but neither of them regret it, regardless of virgil and patton’s comments of ‘how much sleep did you get last night? you look like you’re about to pass out.’

that weekend, their finals are all handed in, exams don’t start until the next week, and they’re both sick and tired of studying so logan invites roman over and they lounge in his star-speckled room, talking about everything and nothing

roman’s busy going through logan’s stuff (“what? i haven’t been in here since the summer before the seventh grade”) so logan has a free minute to just,, watch him, and he just now realizes how much he missed having this ball of energy in his life (in a positive way)

after that day, the tension between them is almost gone and conversations are so much easier (virgil and patton get to sigh in relief because ‘thank god, i love them, but they needed to get their shit together’)

but alas, exams approach and roman calls logan late one night, in tears and stressed beyond relief, begging him to meet him at the park (he would’ve called patton, but patton’s never really been under forced academic pressure, and logan’s just a smidge more familiar for him)

logan’s out of the house without another thought, and he sees roman sitting up on the monkey bars with his knees tucked up to his chest (‘oh my god roman don’t you dare fucking fall’)

“i’m sorry, you were probably sleeping, but i just needed to get out of the house and―”

“please don’t apologize for reaching out. what― what’s wrong?”

“i just can’t! my mom’s been threatening to pull me out of music if i don’t do well on this exam because ‘math is more important than music’ but i don’t know anything! i’ve been scraping by pretty well on tests but i can’t fucking study and none of the information is sticking and―”

“roman, you’re hyperventilating. you need to breathe―”

“don’t tell me what to do!” roman regrets this Immediately because logan recoils his hand like he’s been burned. great, just another thing to feel Bad about. “i-i’m sorry, i shouldn’t have snapped at you.”

if this was a month or two ago, logan would’ve had a scathing remark about roman’s inability to control himself but now he just places his hand back on roman’s shoulder and taps gently with his finger

“you remember that school assembly from grade nine? the one about mental health?”

“yeah?”

“can you do that breathing exercise?”

“probably”

ten minutes later, roman’s cried himself out and he’s stopped hyperventilating but he can’t seem to stop his hands from shaking

logan has absolutely no idea what to do but he’s seen patton do it before with some of the younger kids so he holds his arms out (v awkwardly) and goes, “would you― would it be― would a hug help?”

this gets a lil laugh out of roman because he’s trying and that’s adorable so now he’s cry-laughing into logan’s shoulder

“your mother sounds an awful lot like your horrendous dragon witch. i suppose we must simply team up to defeat her.”

roman draws away so fast he bumps into logan’s chin

“OH MY GOD YOU REMEMBER THAT”

“like i could forget it”

“oh my god”

“i mean, i wanted to, but those were… fun times.”

“hell yeah they were.”

“when’s your exam? i can help you study, if you want.”

“in about seven hours.”

“…change of plans, you’re coming back with me, you’re going to sleep for six, wake up, get a cup of tea, and we’re going to do a brief review before school.”

“…okay.”

so they walk back to logan’s house (roman makes sure to tack a note to his bedroom door for his parents, he’ll face the consequences later), and they just, collapse into a pile of leggy boi on logan’s bed (they were too tired to argue about formalities)

logan wakes up with roman clinging to his chest and he very sorely misses that warm cuddly heat but Nope he is Determined™ to help roman get that bread

so he wakes roman up, plops his notes down in front of him and tells him to flip through it while he goes to make breakfast

roman is a jittery Mess all the way up to the exam, but logan promises that he’d be waiting in the cafeteria for him (it was his lunch period’s exam day so he a Free Boi) and he leaves roman with a “you are more capable than you know. you already have everything you need to succeed. and no matter what, you are valid.”

two hours later, roman comes out and he has Zero Confidence in his results, but logan greets him with a clap on the shoulder and the reassurance that “at least you’re done with this.”

they meet up with virgil and patton and go for lunch, and oho, perhaps this is the beginning of a New Squad

at the end of the week, on exam review day logan’s waiting out in the hallway to go to his next class to see his results when he sees roman sprinting down the hall with the biggest grin on his face

“i got an 84!!! thank you, you beautiful blessed nerd!!” because honestly? roman expected nothing more than a 52 so this was a very pleasant surprise, and now roman’s hugging logan so tight that logan swears he heard his elbow pop

the other students of the school are still processing because it was literally only been a little over a month since they started talking to each other again, and anyone out of the loop just got hella whiplash

(and if this burst of happiness and gratitude left a weird, bubbly feeling in logan’s stomach, well, he’ll just keep that to himself)

the next few summer days are spent hanging out, in their rooms, at their windows, at the park, and sometimes, virgil and patton join them

sometimes they’re in roman’s room, roman typing away on his computer with a dozen open notebooks scattered around him while logan lays on his bed, and the two bounce ideas back and forth for the next adventures of the daring prince c and his faithful advisor logos

and then they’re two weeks into the summer break, virgil’s off visiting family in china for the next few weeks and patton’s in the caribbean, so they’re just aimlessly tossing a ball back and forth in roman’s room while they talk about their futures and stuff because “oh my god they’re gonna be high school  s e n i o r s  in the fall“ ((‘gee, blink, don’t u think that’s a lot of drama for 16 y/os?’ yes absolutely, shut up))

roman chucks the ball at logan, who catches it in one hand and he’s smirking and roman has to take a moment to catch his breath because ‘why was that so hot omg’

over the next couple weeks the two are basically joined at the hip, and when they’re not hanging out, they’re texting or calling each other and it finally feels like they’re really making up for lost time

at the same time, they may or may not be falling for each other and they have no idea what to do with these Feelings™ 

logan doesn’t know how to what to do because virgil is v aro and the only other person he can talk to is roman, whOM HE HAS A CRUSH ON

meanwhile roman is v frantically texting patton like bro pls call me as soon as u get back there’s a cute boy hELP

it’s nearing the beginning of august when the two go into town to get food and ice cream and they’re laughing and joking and waving melted strawberry ice cream in each other’s faces and they’re sitting on a bench when they lean in real close mid laugh and ‘oh no his face is rIGHT THERE’

they draw away real quick but both of them realize that ‘that wasn’t horrible?’ and they slowly look back at each other and ‘oh.’

“is this―”

“um―”

“is this― i mean if you want it to be ―  is this a date?” and roman holds his breath because ‘dear god, please say yes’

“i’d like it to be, yes.” logan is terrified because he does  n o t  want to fuck this up

except now roman has the biggest grin and he absolutely does not care that he’s got ice cream dripping onto his leg

roman tackles logan into a hug because ‘he’s on a date with logan fucking crane’

logan is thrilled because now he gets to keep this excitable ball of energy who’s made him smile and laugh more in the past couple months than he has in years

(no diss against virgil and patton, but they can’t relate to logan and roman as well as, well, logan and roman)

they both have ice cream on themselves but neither can be bothered to care at this moment because they’re so damn happy

even after they go home that night, they stay up real late at their windows, side by side, just appreciating the company

it’s the next day, and they’re at the park, the sun is setting ((listen,,,, it’s an aesthetic)) and they’re sitting on the swings, holding hands ((they’re in love, babey!!))

“are we… does this make us boyfriends now?” logan is a v technical, official terminology person, of course he’d be the one to ask

“if you want to be boyfriends.”

“i don’t think i’d be asking if i didn’t.”

“then yeah, yeah we’re boyfriends.”

logan walks back into his house with a giant smile, and he plays that event over and over and over again in his mind as he lies awake in bed that night

roman calls patton immediately

and they may or may not scream about it together

logan sends virgil a short text that goes along the lines of ‘roman and i are dating now’ but in real life he’s so giddy that his fingers shake as he types it out

they have their first kiss in roman’s bedroom a couple days later

when school rolls back around in the fall, they walk through the doors hand in hand

and now their rivalry is nothing but a legend that the seniors tell the freshmen whenever someone complains about ‘that one couple that keeps making out in the math wing stairwell, excuse me, i just want to get to class’

[hoopdiddies]

I'm Not Over You // Ben Hardy x Reader (Part 10)

A/N: I am so sorry that I have not been on for a full week. The phone I had used to edit this in broke and I had to buy a new one plus this is the last chapter and apparently the longest, regardless of my recent claims of the previous ones being the longest lmao. I hope this won't disappoint, I couldn't think of a more consistent flow due to the days I've been without my phone to type some ideas in. I hope you guys will enjoy this last part anyway, and thank you so much for supporting this entire series! I have a new series in mind but it's a WIP. Thanks again for all the love! IMPORTANT NOTE: I WILL BE CUTTING A PART IN THIS CHAPTER AND PUTTING IT UNDER A PART 10.1 IMMEDIATELY AFTER I POST THIS FOR THE SAKE OF THE LIMIT. TAGS WILL BE MENTIONED IN THE COMMENTS

Summary for this part: A wedding brought you apart and it will be a wedding that will bring you back together.

Warnings: A good balance of fluff and angst, mention of injuries and alcohol and some long ass writing.

WC: A whopping 10k

Parts: 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1

You are painfully a feet away from the door and yet here you are, frozen after having turned 180 degrees only to stumble upon those eyes you had hoped to gaze into again. One swallow from you and you begin gliding along the tiled surface towards him, checking through every pad whether or not he's really awake.

After stopping at his side, you are now certain you're not anywhere close to dreaming. "Ben?" His name leaving your lips like an answered prayer. He's staring back at you with his left eye half-open – taking into account his current sensitivity to light– but with the same energy he exudes everytime you're together.

His chapped lips curl into a smile so slow yet so sweet at the same time; almost an upgrade to his classic 'Benny beam' which you had fun dubbing back in the days. "Y/N..."

And once again, you disrupt the orderly function of your tears and let them gush down, quickly but carefully wrapping your arms around him in bittersweet joy, exclaiming his name thrice into his hospital gown. "You...you bloody idiot! I thought you'd never wake up..."

Having just woken up from a coma, his voice comes out extra breathy and brittle but full of life, chuckling at how you're greeting him back into the conscious world. "Is that...is that how you welcome your best mate back?"

You shake your head ardently, sniffling against his chest and taking in the scent of mint. "Shut up. You frightened us!"

He really wakes up seconds before the clock strikes 'it's too late'. The convenience is hardly believable.

"I'm gonna call the doctor and tell him you're up." You act swiftly on your feet but a grip as strong as you least expected it to be hinders you from taking a step away and you turn around at Ben who's woven his fingers around yours. You give him a concerned yet quizzical look for it.

He sighs deeply, closing his logy eyes for a brief moment before opening them to you– gazing up at you meaningfully as he draws you close with the little, physical strength he has left. "You frightened me, rather."

"What... are you talking about?"

You won't admit it now but the way his fingers are currently snaked around yours could make your heart palpitate any second now.

His green eyes bore into yours effectively, suddenly invalidating your surroundings and making it seem like it's just you and him on the face of the entire planet.

He struggles to swallow before repeating. "You frightened me. You're still leaving..."

His voice crack as he said 'leaving' obliterates the fragments of what was once your soul, punching a gaping hole as a replacement. How is he able to remember your emotional outburst at the after party when he has just woken up and should at least forget a few details?

But then you realize you've been talking to him a lot as he was out of order.

You nod unfortunately, laying your hand on his which is still fondling your other one. His skin has warmed up a notch and that's a progress. You need to clarify this to him again since the last time you did, you both ended up in  disarray and in the middle of the road.

"I...I've already told you everything."

"I don't wanna- I don't wanna lose you."

"Ben..." You cut off as your hopeless gazes meet like lightning, his irises  darkening at the manner in which your eyes have transfixed on his.

"Please..."

Worried that his stable condition might shift due to the rising agitation he's showing, you sit beside him and bring his knuckles up to your lips, hearing the beeping of the heart monitor quicken which sounds incredibly alarming, an indication that his heart rate has elevated due to his induced stress.

You press your lips into his pale knuckles with your eyes thoroughly shut hoping to soothe him through it, tears trickling from your cheeks and onto the back of his hand as you choke on your words. "Ben...come on. You know I can't stay, you have to understand that."

He slowly shakes his head, biting his bottom lip as he grimaces at the bitterness, softly but agonizingly begging for you to reconsider. "You have to. Please, love. I need you to. I want you to."

Do the short term effects include stubbornness? Cause he's really determined to get you to stay no matter what. Joe must be tortured with waiting by now and at any given moment, he's bound to consider barging in.

You kind of hope he would. God, you should be out there notifying his attending physician about his regained consciousness and for goodness sake, Rosy ought to be here for this. She can't just wander out whenever she likes when her fiance's an injured man struggling to recover.

While keeping his trembling knuckles close to your lips, you move closer and question him, your voice downsizing to an unsteady whisper. "Why? Ben, I'm leaving primarily to pursue a career. Not just because of some heartbreak, this is a dream come true. I'm finally a stair close to reaching it. Why aren't you at least happy for me?"

"I am..."

"Then you have to let me go."

"It's not that easy..."

"Do you think it's any more easier for me? No! But this is what must be and you have to trust me on this," it's as if your heart is in your mouth from feeling so harrowed by all of this, but you have to make him see that this is the only way and that it is also important that you leave, "I'm sorry if I said some things that night that weren't exactly the way I felt. But I have to leave. You're getting married to Rosy soon, you know. Don't worry about me..."

He wishes he could just sit up with ease and cage you in his arms but all his incapacities at the moment are inhibiting him from doing so. Knowing he can't do anything about it emotionally deflates him.

He withdraws his hand a little and presses it to your flushed cheek, kneading your delicate skin as he shakes his head gently to prevent the dressing around his head from becoming less taut.

"I think I know well enough who I want to marry now..."

You can't distinguish what present beating has accelerated; the heart monitor's, your own heart, or at best both. But you're sure as hell his words weren't a product of your own imagination, your eyes drifting from one of his orbs to the other in a daze, looking for any sign that would prove that it's not you he's directed it at but it does otherwise.

"What are you saying?"

The skin of the front of his neck moves along as he swallows dryly to assure you the realness of his words, his thumb traveling up your face to wipe  the moist corner of your eye. "I'm a bloody wanker for taking so long to see...that you're the one who has always kept me grounded, who has always made me feel more like myself. Even as far as making me feel like I don't need all this fame to lead a good life, " his breath shortens between each sentence and your jaw goes slack as he exploits the atmosphere to continue, eyes buried deep into yours as if the space in between doesn't even matter anymore.

"I'm an idiot...for not realising sooner that it's always been you."

"Ben-"

"I love you too, Y/N L/N, more than the way I used to. How could I ever be happy without you? We promised neither of us is going anywhere, right? "

Definitely not in the context of mere friendship. For a moment, you make it your quest to find your voice to react and you do.

"You can't. You can't- I mean, what about Rosy? Surely your feelings for her wouldn't just go away like that-"

"It's been doused for so long with the ones for you growing," he's thumb is now gingerly stroking circles on your cheek, the green in his eyes gleaming, "that dance at the after party put me in my place and I asked you if you were still coming to my wedding because...it was my way of telling you how I felt at that moment."

Despite the idea coming off a little incoherent, you immediately get the bottom line. It would've been like coming to your own wedding. You study his gaze confusingly before coming to believe that he actually does love you back in the way you always have.

The words have been built up from the moment he whipped out his share of the polaroid and reestablished his promise as the way he felt towards you took a dramatic turn.

Yet no matter how badly you want to stay and finally work some things out with him, he's engaged and you're leaving in 45 minutes.

And what of Rosy? Hopefully Ben wouldn't think of just fragmenting her like that.

Your deafening silence puts Ben under a heap of worry as he painfully anticipates for your reaction. You shake your head at the unlikelihood of your present situations, bringing your eyes shut as you respond in the only way you can without any words needed to express how sorry you are and how much you've waited for him to say it.

Against your better judgement, you lean your body towards him and catch him off guard with the most bittersweet, goodbye kiss anyone could ever exercise on a moment's notice.

You can tell his positive response with how rapid the heart monitor pulses are becoming and how his lips have begun moving passionately against yours.

His eyes flutter shut in return, tangling his fingers in your hair as he dares to deepen the kiss, eager to feel every inch of your lips as he knows that you still won't be staying after this.

Wait for me to come home...

You pull away catching your breaths as you rest your forehead on his, his hand stroking the back of your hair for the little time you have left in your hands.

This feels so wrong yet so right at the same time. Howbeit strong the desire to stay put, you break away before the spark between either of you becomes magnetizing enough to change your mind.

"Please tell me where you're going...please." He pleads yet you refuse to tell him where you're headed to avoid a fuss, shaking your head apologetically with the space between you both increasing.

"I'm so sorry." You whisper, retreating quickly to the door as you ignore his broken pleas and just in time to be welcomed by the doctor, Rosy and some nurses who are here to conduct another assessment. Your pulse picks up at the sight of an uneasy Rosy along with an extra glimpse of a tuft of red and a head of blonde hair overtopping from behind her, eager to check up on whatever is occurring.

Joe and Lucy.

You clear your throat as you utter quickly to the doctor, unable to set your gaze steady. "He's awake." Your update stirs them to hasten on their steps inwards and you don't bother to stop to give Rosy a glance as she brushes by you, with you feeling the slightest, if not an immense amount of guilt for kissing her fiance– your best friend, who now has to make a troubling choice in choosing between you and her. Most importantly, you wouldn't dare to contend with Rosy over this, you'd rather let it happen naturally and see where it would lead but that's the least of your priorities.

You've whizzed a meter past Joe and Lucy but freeze in your spot at Joe's frail call of your name, your shoulders relaxing after a brief pause. "Y/N...how did- how did it go?"

You remain static in your spot, just wanting to leave the building and basically see past everything.

"Let's just go."

Of course he and Lucy half expected your last conversation to be balanced on a scale of nonchalant to vehement but it went off the boundary of vehemence. With one more look at the closed door, the two catch up with you on your way out with a plan on revisiting Ben on their way back from the airport.

You lengthen the sleeve of your sweater and dab your eyes with it, striding towards the car and slipping into passenger's seat gracefully with the two trailing from behind. Once they climb in after you, they begin bombarding you with questions you'd expect them to drop but being so exhausted from all of drama just lessens your likelihood of elaborating your answers. With a few questions dismissed, you ask Joe to just step on it and he complies sadly.

Lucy gives you a sympathetic, lopsided smile and however stagnant your expression is at the moment, you return the favor as the car accelerates on the road ahead.

You bother to give the distancing hospital one last look; giving him one last look.

At the same time the doctors are asking Ben some questions and performing a few physical tests on him, you make it to the airport with some time to spare. Joe and Lucy accompany you into the waiting area agreeing to stick around just until your flight number is announced.

Propping your luggage bag against a vacant seat next to the ones Joe and Lucy are seated on, you dig through your pocket and pull your phone out to check if there are any calls you've slept on. So far nothing of the sort but a dozen texts from friends and acquaintances wishing you the best on your flight to Spain, though you still have to return to London to collect your essentials.

Their words coax a small smile on your lips and after pressing the button to your home screen, the wallpaper brings a small tear to your eye– you and Ben with your arms wrapped around each other beaming goofily at the shutter of the camera.

In this instance, you begin wondering why photos and pictures

have become such a recurring emblem in your friendship. Joe and Lucy notice the sadness spring out of your eyes and cloud your features as you gaze one last time at your phone, and they instantly figure out what you were looking at. Lucy gets up and turns you around softly by the shoulder, prompting you to talk it out to them prior to leaving. If it unloads the stresses you're under then you agree to it, telling them what went on inside the room not too long ago.

Upon mentioning the bit where Ben confessed to you and was insistent on not letting you leave, Joe breathes out a firm, "I knew it" and Lucy shakes her head incredulously at Ben's 'perfect' timing but overall they're both glad he's opened his eyes– in a metaphorical and physical sense– to the person who has always been worthy of that spot in his life. As your conversation comes to a close, the announcement of the boarding of your flight number limits your bittersweet goodbyes however you do promise that you'll call them as soon as you touchdown.

"You better do well out there! Don't forget to call us every once in a while. Or everyday, damn it!" Joe calls out after blowing multiple kisses to you, he and Lucy bidding you an effective farewell.  You wave back at them with a reassuring grin before disappearing into the crowd of bustling passengers, huffing sadly underneath your breath as you trail your finger smoothly across your bottom lip– where Ben had left his precious, goodbye mark for you. Something you ought to hold on to dearly for the moments you'll be missing out on.

Many months later

During your first day in the University of Barcelona, you could've sworn it was all but a dream and at any given moment you could've awakened; but it wasn't. It was right before your eyes and you were standing upon the solid concrete that held those opportunities. In the first days you were but a foreigner; merely wandering around the campus with your textbooks in hand making your journey to the lab and cafeteria a noble quest. Like your life depended on finding your way through every twist and turn on a day to day basis, asking fellow students where particular rooms were as you struggled to maintain good eye contact.

It was an everyday uphill battle for everyone.

However things have improved immensely in the following months, you have gained new friends in most of your classes, developed a good sense of direction around the campus and you've scored solid 90's in your classes which you thought would be bumpy the first time but attainable anyway through nights spent with ounces of coffee, extensive reading and episodes of academic agony.

Despite the pressures in your first year, you still keep in touch with your friends and family back home, especially with Joe and Lucy to whom you had once swore to always call. They're glad to know you've been at your peak in the past few months plus they wouldn't stop making a fuss about how much they miss you and long to have some sort of reunion once you decide to go back for a break. They've been well too– Joe's planning on producing a new movie although he's not certain with the details yet, Gwilym has talked to you as well and he's thriving with new projects which you were quick to congratulate him on and Lucy - oh, darling Lucy- apparently Rami had taken her out of the country again and popped the question out of nowhere just two months after you left.

Of course, when she told you the news the hot brew you had nearly swallowed came spewing out of your mouth in surprise thereby catching the attention of the people you were with at that time. But that was out of happiness too, she's invited you to her wedding –a few months after breaking to you the news of her engagement– which is to take place two weeks from now, something you're unfortunately unsure of attending since you are steadfast on getting heaps of classwork done.

But you promised to update her if ever you found an opening on that week to squeeze in a flight.

"Aren't you coming with us? They're waiting downstairs and it's our only night off this week. " Ava, your roommate and closest friend among the others, asks as she slips on her cardigan, ready to leave for a night out. You've got a book propped up in front of you and you were just getting immersed in the lines you've taken your eyes off of. "Er, it's kind of a cold night out. You girls have fun anyway."

"You sure?"

You nod, flipping your pen in your fingers. "Just bring me home a smoothie while you're at it."

"Get your butt off the chair and do it yourself!" She whines as she throws a nearby ball of cotton at you and you giggle lightheartedly, wishing her and the girls good luck as she heads out, shutting the door behind her.

You're just relieved they can communicate fluently with you or you never would've gotten around the city easily. Just as you begin turning your attention back to your book, you suddenly lose the interest to continue and just close it for the night, picking your phone up and tossing yourself on the bed with a small jounce as you land.

You shift on your spot as you check through your messages, emails, some posts from friends and whatnot to pass the hour, eventually noticing a message from an unknown number sent just earlier today. Curiosity peaks in you and you don't think twice before clicking on it to read.

You've changed your number weeks prior anyway so it could be from someone you know whose phone number you haven't asked for yet.

Hey, Y/N.

I know this is out of the blue but it's been a while since I've heard from you and in all honesty I didn't even bother to contact you the first time out of the assumption that you might have busied yourself a lot and don't have the time to check your phone. But I've become so worried then that I had to decide to ask you how you're doing. How you're holding up wherever you are. If you're not overworking yourself since you tend to do that a lot. I know it's been months since we've last talked to each other but I just miss you. I miss seeing you, having those late night conversations that got you late in the morning for work, hanging out and your voice. I kind of want to call you but you might be occupied and I don't wanna be a bit of a bother.

I miss you so much, love. Every single day. I'm trying to distract myself with the new project I've taken but you're just impossible to sleep on. When will you ever be back?

Why does the tone of the message seem familiar?

You reread along the last lines and your heart comes to a stop at one word that gives away the possible identity of the sender.

The lingering silence in the room making it possible for you to hear the elevated throbbing of your heart. It's been a while since he's slipped into your mind and even until now, the love you have for him is still flourishing wholly. Even when you had your mind set on your studies, your heart unknowingly had some other priorities.

So has he called things off with Rosy because if he hasn't yet, the tone of the message wouldn't come off as sincere as this.

That's a question you don't need answered for the meantime however you wonder how he was able to text you when you've pretty much changed your number.

You hope he's fully recovered from that head trauma though it's been nearly a year since that happened. Your thumbs hover over the keyboard, thinking about replying.

Hey. Ben if this is you, it's great to hear from you again.

Your eyes dart to the send button, taking a brief pause before hitting it and discarding your phone to the side at least hoping he wouldn't respond immediately because then it would lead to a conversation that might just turn awkward.

Never have you had an awkward talk with him so it's something you wouldn't want to acquaint yourself with.

You grab your pillow and press your cheek against it in uncertainty.

"Don't even start...thinking about him." You mumble groggily into the pillow and lay flat on your back as you begin wallowing in your own doubt, your eyes becoming droopy at every second spent on staring at the pale ceiling with your right arm and leg thrown over the pillow like you're never gonna let it go.

You never even considered seeing someone else because deep down, you still hoped for him. Though you had exchanged some stares and 'interactive' words with a few guys in your classes, none of them ever came or would ever come close to Ben.

- - - - - - -

This week's lab work gave your brain a mild whiplash with all the hustling you were required to do.

Every morning, you either had breakfast or not and it all depended on how early you had to be there. Provided that you had to take off in the early hours, you had to skip a good  bite nearly every morning; plus you were all being assessed closely by your professor and so a downshifted movement was every bit as unacceptable.

At least now that you had just gotten off from your last period you can reward yourself with some good Mediterannean food that should be the ultimate dinner of your night.

You and Ava are seated around a table laughing and enjoying each other's companies with your plates and glasses half-filled with leftovers after a quick chow down, but your attention is quickly divided as a text from Lucy surfaces. She's asked you about your availability next week and you ought to re-check your schedule for it. Once again upon pressing your home screen button you can't help but let a longing smile take form on your lips at your wallpaper and with you being oblivious to Ava noticing, to your demise, she takes a sly peek at what you're looking at and disrupt your train of thought.

"Who's that?" Ava asks with a cheeky grin to which you quickly recoil with your phone held loosely in your hand.

"Nothi- no-one. "

As nosy as she is tenacious, she swiftly

snatches your phone from your weak grip and dares to unlock it, the  wallpaper of you and Ben making her swoon in delight. "Y/N, how on Earth did you get Ben Hardy to hold you for a photo like this?" Squealing like a schoolgirl, Ava grills you with an inquisitive look. You've never bothered to tell her or any of your new found friends anything about your friendship with him and so now she thinks you're a fan who merely got luck in her favour for a picture.

If only she knew.

"I don't know? How'd you know it's him?" You speak up your mind, a fleeting blush crawling its way to your face.

" Bohemian Rhapsody was a hit, of course. Queen rocks and I was all for it," she gesticulates as a matter of fact and winks playfully, "and later on we were all for the cutie who played Roger Taylor."

You try your very best not to let a single squeak of laughter escape your lips as she begins drooling over him. What are the chances of her finding out, right? You would tell her about it and have her meet him however your situation is too dire to act in. Come to think of it, you haven't received a reply to your reply to his message. He could be juggling a lot in his hands at the moment, perhaps.

"Cutie. Yeah, he's cute. But the guy seems clumsy enough to drop your heart." Here you are throwing a sportive shade all the way from Barcelona.

As if she's taken a fake offense at your comment, Ava overdoes a gasp. "Is that how you say thanks?"

You respond with a one-shoulder shrug, your voice neutral to keep yourself from giving away the screams of your heart. "I'm just saying. What are we doing next week by the way?"

"As I've been told by Mr. Gomez, the school will be hosting an array of meetings with the BOD and so we're given a time off."

You blink thrice at her. "Seriously? Like a week?"

She forks a tapa from her plate and bites down on it, nodding at you. "Three days max." So you don't have the entire week off, but that's great. Given that you had told Lucy you'd update her about your availability during that time and now that you have a few days to spare, you're conditioned to go. You quickly get up from your chair and excuse yourself from Ava, making your way to the terrace to dial Lucy who you hope is reachable at the meantime.

"Hello?"

"Lucy, hey!"

"Y/N, thank goodness you called!"

"About my weekly update?" You bite down on your lip in excitement, swinging your leg back and forth aimlessly.

"What about it?"

"I'm free next week."

- - - - - - -

"And cut! Okay everyone, lunch break. We're not cleaning up the rubble yet so we'll leave it there for the next scene." At the sound of the clapperboard slamming, all stunts have been ceased until the next roll and the main actors retreat individually to their own trailers, one of which is Ben who is walking back within beads of sweat dripping from his forehead as a result of a car stunt he had to perform on set. He's glad he can finally swing his left arm with unbridled ease after disposing of the sling just two months back although he's left with a few scars; the primary one on his forehead from the trauma he had.

A PA hands him a bottle of water and he thanks her for the save, cracking the lid off and chugging away. He waves at his fellow co-stars before entering his trailer and slipping out of his sweaty shirt, dumping it on the edge of the bed.

He places the bottle on a coffee table and swipes his phone from his drawer, being welcomed by a heap ton of messages, one days older than the next. He scratches his head at the result of his constant business; not being able to find time to reply thereby impregnating his inbox with miscellaneous messages.

Three from Lucy which he is 'obligated' to check first and foremost. Ben's lips twitch to an uneven smirk as he reads her messages, amused that he's been invited to her wedding, along with other people.

He replies with a simple yet sincere, "Thanks, I'll mark it on my calendar" before proceeding to put his phone down on the bed. He sighs, taking out his wallet from his drawer and opening it to pick out something, the dual polaroid he's folded in catching his eye and all of his attention; and for a moment, his heart stops.

He pulls it out from its slot and unfolds it, the tape used to stick it together  crinkled but still an effective adhesive. Without taking his eyes off of the polaroids, he plops down on the edge of the bed and wipes his forehead, hiding the ridiculous smile he now has on his face behind his hand. The memory still does things to him apparently and he has never let go since the day you kissed him goodbye. He can still feel the touch of your lips linger on his and admittedly, he traces his finger across the spot every time you cross his mind. The things you had said to him while he was unconscious ultimately stuck in his mind and he just longs to hear your voice once more. There are multiple times he forgets that you're not around to vent to or watch a good game of rugby with or do whatever you used to do together, no matter the trouble.

Generally speaking, he just yearns to be with you.

On a side note, he had long called things off with Rosy, exactly a day after he had awakened. Of course, she didn't take it easy but he knew damn well who he loved.

A heavy sigh leaves Ben's lips as he lowers his head at the frustration he feels for never owning up to his feelings.

She probably has some other guy in her life now. What are my chances? He thinks dryly to himself. "Hey, Ben? Break is over." The assistant director knocks on his trailer door and he tells him that he'll be out in a few. Tucking the polaroids back into his wallet, he snags the fresh shirt that's been laid out on the sofa across him and pulls it on, combing his blond hair back with his fingers before heading out to get the day done without realizing that he has skipped your reply.

With the days leading up to Rami and Lucy's wedding, they have never been more busier about any other event in their entire lives. They've decided on a beach wedding and to hold the reception there as well. Lucy has made you one of her bridesmaids yet you declined at first because that would mean you would have to fly in early for a practice down the aisle but she's assured you that practice wouldn't be necessary. She has taken care of the dresses and such and all you need to do is just fly down to California, again, to attend. Speaking of dresses, you bought her a little wedding gift yourself. It's something small but it's bound to suit her look.

You've told Ava about the wedding– excluding essential details like whose wedding it is specifically– and she's a little disheartened that you wouldn't be around to hang out with for the week but you've reassured her that you won't be long; considering you'll also be reviewing for upcoming tests.

"Okay, so it's a beach wedding? Drastic times call for some drastic measures, chica!" She exclaims and throw her arms up in the air, springing out of her bed and rummaging through her wardrobe as you throw what you can into one, just one luggage bag.

She pulls out a black two-piece bikini from the drawers and upon beholding it, you feel your eyes burn to a crisp. "There won't be any swimming, as far as I'm concerned."

"You'll never know. Just toss this in, it might come in handy." You swear you saw a mischievous glint in her eye as she said that. You press your lips into a tentative, hard line before surrendering,  grabbing the pair from her and stuffing it in the unreachable depths of your luggage.

"Happy?" She nods vigorously and you sigh in defeat, zipping your bag close.

The day came and the jet lag is still real. You've flown in a day prior,  exactly the day of Lucy's bridal shower and well, a literal bone crushing hug welcomed you on your way into the arrival area. She looked really fresh and bloomy before you arrived but afterwards, it was a messy head of hair and a waste of makeup, not to give it a stretch but it was. She's shed a few tears from how long you've been gone and you couldn't help but shed a few yourself, awfully missing her and the rest.

She's prepped a hotel for all her bridesmaids to stay in and you had some thoughts on how much she's spent but it's her wedding so who are you to question? As she helps you settle in your room, she pauses and brings you in for another big hug.

"Aww, Luce." You chuckle over her shoulder, rubbing her back.

She snaps her eyes shut and hums. "Oh Y/N, I've missed you. We all have. I know we call a lot even from a distance but it's been so long since we've last seen each other."

You sigh heavily, still holding her close.

"LAX. Yeah. It's only been a year but it feels like forever," you pull away deliberately, hands still firm on her shoulders with a heartfelt gaze, "Congratulations, Luce. You and Rami better make wonderful babies."

She smacks your arm lightly as an appropriate response to your little tease. "Shut it. Tell me everything."

"Everything?"

"Yeah," she planks down on the edge of the duvet and crosses her legs, leaning her body forward, "how's Spain? How's the school? The agony? Been seeing someone?" The last bit catches you by surprise; as if she's emphasized the question enough for it to be the main thing you have to answer. You disregard it for a few seconds until she brings it up again. You turn to give her an incredulous brow lift, something she returns with a curious grin. "Are you seeing anyone?"

In your mind, she should know that you've only ever had one guy in your heart but knowing Lucy, she just wants to hear you say it yourself .

You huff underneath your breath, planting your hands on your hips as you perpend on saying the following. "Spain is amazing. School is both heaven and hell. The agony exists in every divot, and no, I'm not seeing anyone."

"That's good."

You glance sideways awkwardly. "Okay? Is what good?"

"Everything, except the agony part, especially the last."

"I'm not seeing anyone?" You repeat and she nods with a blossoming smile. You don't say anything else since it's obvious that she's keen on letting you talk about Ben but today's not the day that you do. It's the day before her wedding and every present air particle should be all about her.

"Regardless, Miss Boynton. This week is all about you so," you alter your stance and skip to your luggage bag, unzipping one compartment and pulling out your wedding gift for her, "it's not much but I figured this looks better if it's on you." You hand her the palm-sized object and she lets out a little gasp at what you got her. It's a hair comb adorned with two, white roses and pale rhinestones that glimmer under the spilling light.

Something that would upgrade her sun-kissed beauty on a clear day. You try it on her and step back to picture her with the full ensemble as she walks down the sandy aisle tomorrow. "Good lord, look at you all grown up." You pretend to tear up and she tilts her head back in a burst of laughter, walking to you with welcoming arms and green eyes that are nearly brimming with tears.

"Oh I love it, Y/N! I knew something was missing in the outfit but you've completed it. It's perfect." She mumbles happily against your shoulder and her contentment tickles your insides.

"I'm glad you like it."

After giving you a look of what you'll be wearing tomorrow and a few, friendly  introductions to the rest of the bridesmaids, the bridal shower is where everything is at. Ranging from colorful streamers to champagne to cake strippers, the latter putting you under uneasy situations when you just wished to enjoy your drink and your own space. At the same hour you're enjoying yourselves, on the other side of town is where Rami and the boys are on full swing with his bachelor's party. It has the same vibe, only without the strippers and streamers and constant belly-aching movement.

You just pray none of you will be waking up with hangovers at the hour you'll be fixing yourselves.

And indeed none of you have.

You've all waken up like ladies but clumsily as the realization of the time nudges you out of your beds. Ceremony starts at 9 and you're 5 hours early to ensure that everything progresses smoothly.

It's a condensed hustle within your separate rooms; the pattern of getting ready ever so similar. Shower, makeup, hair, dress, and retouch; all done in complete unison. With all the bridesmaids, including yourself, conditioned outfit-wise, you all gather in Lucy's room to assist in psyching her up for the big day. Her mom's in too to witness every precious second of seeing her daughter fly off on her own.

She's still in her robe but her hair and makeup have been beautifully done by one of her makeup artist friends. She's about to step into her gown, a sight the girls are just dying to see.

"Alright, Lucy. Let me just zip up the back." Says one of the girls who has helped with her makeup as Lucy stands confidently but nervously in front of the mirror, scanning her reflection. You fold your hands together in anticipation, gasping as she turns around slowly with the skirt of the gown gracefully following her turning motion. Her radiance could put the sun's to complete shame.

"Well, say something, girls." She prompts with a chuckle and as expected, it is followed by the uproarious squeal of everyone in the room including yourself. Rami is guaranteed to have his gaze super-glued to Lucy the moment she reveals herself. After having a dozen compliments shower her, you and the rest of the girls retreat outside to give her and her mother a time to talk. As you lean against the door frame, you fish out your phone from your purse and check your messages; coming across your reply to Ben which hasn't received another one from him yet.

You wipe off the downhearted smirk on your expression as the girls' murmurs increase as Lucy steps out holding a bouquet of flowers with her mom on her arm and the edge of her gown lifted by two assistants. She turns her head to find you and crooks her finger at you upon seeing you inclined against the frame, letting you walk by her side.

You notice she's sporting the gift you've given her and the sentimentality makes you want to tear up but in doing so would ruin your makeup and so you decide to save it for the kiss.

You lean in close to her and whisper in a flat but playful tone, your words making her giggle. "Rami's totally getting it."

"I'm not the only one who's getting it today." She winks at you and leaves you questioning what she meant. She made it sound like it's something you have to find out for yourself later on. The weather is fine and not as humid as you thought; the ideal atmosphere to marry under. The bridesmaids are to ride in a separate vehicle that will follow up behind the one Lucy and her mom will be taking. To say that your ride with the the girls to the resort turned out fun and noisy is an understatement; you couldn't be any more conscious about smudging your makeup as you busted your guts laughing at your topics. The driver had given you weirded out looks but you know he was just trying to feign a laugh. By the time you arrive at the resort, a gust of wind from the seaside welcomes you out and nearly messes up your hair though you've put it up in an elegant bun with your tendrils hanging loosely from the sides of your head. You traverse closely behind the rest of the girls and find the venue nearly packed with attendees in their most sophisticated dresses and suits. The altar is set meters away from the shoreline and a red carpet has been rolled out to serve as the aisle between lines of pillars decorated with tropical flowers. A gentle music piece is being played by a violinist and a cellist situated on the left side of the altar with waiters serving some four-seasoned refreshments for the guests to enjoy as they wait.

With all these people around, you can't help but wonder if either Joe or Gwilym made it. You haven't contacted Joe about arriving, given that you wanted to surprise him with your arrival. You peer down at your wristwatch and it's only an hour before the ceremony starts. Rami's nowhere to be seen and you badly want to congratulate him on this, but either way, he's probably attending to some other people and so you put that chance on hold.

As you had wished for yourself to be void of any mishaps today, you bumping into a tall figure as you turn around to walk away deters that possibility and mortifies you for a moment.

"Oh man, I'm so sorry-" You quickly apologize but cease as a familiar face meets your lifting gaze.

"What- Y/N?!"

"J-Joe?!"

"Y/N!"

"Joe!" After shamelessly screaming each other's names, you put no thought into the action of jumping into his arms for a tight hug. He's crushing you in one anyway. "Oh my g- what- when did you arrive, you little sneak? " He exclaims and lets you go for a split second, careful not to ruin your satin outfit. "You're going to murder me for this but yesterday."

His brows furrow in disbelief as his mouth hangs agape. "How dare you not tell me? I mean, I knew Lucy would invite you but...actually how dare you both for not telling me." He whines in a joking manner and you respond with a quick shrug. "Surprise, surprise."

"You sure did and wow," his eyes travel up and down your outfit and you click your tongue at him as he does, pointing your finger to your eyes that are aimlessly roving around his suit in the same manner. "Hey Mazzello, eyes here."

"Hypocrite, eyes here." He mimics your action mockingly and you take eye-rolling to the next level.

"Damn it Joe, I've missed you."

"Missed you too. Been a year but it feels like a decade and you look beautiful, by the way, in that outfit as a bridesmaid." He places his hand on your upper back and leads you into the lounging area that is close to the pool but not far from the event area.

"You don't look so bad yourself for a groomsman. "

"How'd you guess?"

"This is Rami's wedding. I'd know."

You got an hour to talk before you take your positions anyway so catching up would be vital. You settle down on the sofa and fit your talk into the time limit, telling each other about what went on in your lives for the past few months. A lot of interesting stuff has happened to Joe and he's absolutely lively as he talks about it however yours hasn't been much, just adaptation to a new environment and the academic agony. Your talk takes an interesting turn as Joe asks you a question related to something you haven't thought about for a few days.

"Since you're pretty much still on the market, you ever think about...you know."

Your brows crease at him. "What?"

"You know," he lifts his shoulder in a half shrug, "Ben."

"Oh." Is the only thing you can say. The answer is pretty clear, you do think about him but not on a daily basis. He comes across your mind when you've drifted off into oblivion with your thoughts or when something that may remind you of him catches your eye.

"Sometimes I guess. But not as deep as I used to."

"I know you miss him, Y/N, and he misses you too. Believe me, he tells me everytime he calls."

You cast him a short gaze but look back at your fingers, a little comforted by the thought and it motivates you to ask. "Is he still with Rosy?"

Joe scoffs, mildly amused and wholly relieved at the contrary. "That's the good news. He's broken things off with her long ago. Just a day after he regained consciousness."

"Really?" You won't admit it but part of you feels bad for her.

"Yeah and I'm not spoiling you the rest," he rises from his spot on the sofa and reaches out for your hand, pulling you up gracefully. "The thing's about to start." He gestures to the chairs that are beginning to get occupied by the people as the priest arrives. You walk back out alongside him, leaning in to ask out of curiosity. "What do you mean you won't spoil me the rest?"

"You'll see, now go skedaddle to Lucy. She needs her crew." He pats your shoulder with a crooked smile on and you sigh inwardly, waving at him as you divert paths; with you headed to where the rest of the bridesmaids and the bride herself are gathered.

"Gwilym! You're just on time." Spotting Gwilym making his way to join Sami – Rami's brother– at the front row of chairs on the right wing as one of the groomsmen, Joe greets him with a brief hug and takes his place next to him. Sami greets the two men as well, exchanging some remarks before being joined by Ben who had been caught in traffic on his way. "Benny!"

"Ben!"

"Hey, you guys! Am I late? Did I miss the vows?" He asks with a hint of irony as he takes the spot between Gwil and Joe, shaking hands with Sami at the same time. Not a minute longer they are joined by the remaining groomsmen and Rami who has finally garnered up the physical strength to stand on the altar without breaking a sweat.

"You got this, mate. Just don't look down. Your boutonniere looks nice if I might add." Gwilym simultaneously advises and compliments an already nervous Rami hoping to appease him yet earns a quick yet teasing smack from Joe for making a small joke out of the situation. To show them that he's actually better on every possible level, Rami stands tall and rests his hands on his front to exude that confidence and excitement of being minutes away from watching his soon-to-be Mrs. Malek grace the aisle with her presence.

The guests simmer down with their chatters as the first ones who will be walking down the aisle take their positions. The musicians stop playing as they wait for the cue to initiate the main piece in accordance with the first walk.

Among the ones that will be walking before Lucy's big entrance is you and though you'll be joined by your fellow bridesmaids, it somehow just quakes your nerves, tightening your grip around the small bouquet of flowers you've been given as a prop.

You can't understand why you're feeling nervous; you're not the one that's getting married but you just don't know why. The musicians are given the cue and they begin playing a familiar song, something contemporary but heart-achingly romantic.

"You okay?" Asks a fellow bridesmaid and you nod, telling her that you're a bit anxious. She reassures you with a smile and it unknots your tension. The guests and attendees turn their heads towards the threshold of the aisle and the sponsors begin walking down first. Next are some of their relatives, then you– the bridesmaids. There are at least seven of you and you come in fifth. As you begin sauntering down the aisle, you feel relaxed yet piercing eyes trail your movement yet you beg to differ and keep your head up with a mellow smile on your face as you keep your eyes ahead, your unsteady gaze fleeting from the altar and to the groomsmen seated at the front row of the right wing.

Your eyes land on Joe and Gwilym who start giving you bright beams as they notice you in an instant. If you weren't trying to walk sophisticatedly with all these people staring, you would let out the loudest, most awkward giggle. It's nice to see Gwilym again though. Just as you begin turning your unwavering attention away, you take a subtle double take at a certain pair of eyes that has found you long before you found them. You are meters away from reaching your end of the aisle and yet it seems as if you've only started walking with how the music has turned up and how you're exchanging astonished yet longing gapes with Ben who knows he is seconds away from exploding with who he's finally seeing. You're here as a bridesmaid for Lucy and yet ridiculously, you feel like the bride.

Of course he's here. Of course he's one of the groomsmen. Of course Lucy and Joe wouldn't tell you. Of course this is the thing Joe didn't want to spoil about. Why didn't you think about any of this earlier? It would've saved you the shock regardless of it being so obvious.

You gather the strength to break away from the trance you've put yourself in and stand next to the girls, using up all the willpower in your body to avoid risking a peek at the groomsmen– at one groomsman rather. It's the same struggle for Ben who is every bit as stubborn as the next person and does the contrary, going as far as tilting his head to one side just to cop a longer view of you, an action Joe notices and slaps his hand for. Ben winces a bit and gives Joe a questioning look for two reasons.

"Save it." Joe whispers flatly and yet Ben dismisses it and feels his breath hitch in his throat as the sight of you appeases his worries yet makes his heart run a mile. With the ring bearers and flower girls at the edge of their walk, everyone rises up at the reveal of Lucy. The music slows down to fit the pace of her walk with her mother by her side, her eyes finding Rami's and establishing a home in them. You glance at both of them and feel your heart inflate at how strong their love for each other is, something that usually only exists in novels and fiction. Lucy's eyes well with joyful tears as she reaches the altar and her mother finally surrenders her hand to Rami.

It's too much.

With you being too distracted by the spark between Rami and Lucy, you overlook Ben's unbreakable gaze at you. The moment you grew a smile, it invalidated everything else surrounding him.

The priest requests everyone to finally sit down and witness the lifetime commitment blossom. Throughout the ceremony, you can't help but feel his eyes sear through you yet you stand your ground and fix your gaze at the happenings on the altar, briefly failing every once in a while by finding yourself looking back at him. The moment has come for them to exchange their vows and you listen intently at every word sincerely uttered by the two. There are parts in their vows that make the people giggle and tear up at the emotion put into every word expressed. It seems surreal to you that the moment Rami tells Lucy that he's never going anywhere, your gaze meets Ben's and it becomes undeniably bewitching, Rami's words acting as a call back to your promises. As the rings are exchanged and the "I do's" are said, the priest pronounces them husband and wife and you tear your focus away from Ben just in time for Rami and Lucy to share their first kiss as a married couple. Cheers and applauds fill the air and even more tears of joy are shed at the start of their lifetime bond. They both couldn't look any more blissful, with the pair of them giddily flaunting their rings with grins so radiant and bright it undermines the power of the sun upon them.

The cheers and excitement continue at the reception which, of course, is hosted at the very same place. After the ceremony– you, the girls and Lucy took off to the rooms you've booked in the resort for the meantime to change into the appropriate apparel to match the vibe of the venue and even the venue itself. Rami and the boys drove back to their respective hotels to change as well and it was a bit hard for the newly weds to go their separate ways for a few hours just to change clothes. Now that you've all rejoined for the reception, lively doesn't even begin to cut it. It's just like any other wedding reception and like any other wedding reception, it's upbeat, smooth and a little haywire on the egdes. After going through with dinner and a couple of toasts and remarks about the funny side of Rami and Lucy's relationship, the dance floor is open for business. At first glance, the girls take you for someone who is in need of a lot acquainting with the dance floor and they're right; because of that they haul you in themselves and you end up enjoying moving around to the music. You decide to refreshen yourself with a glass of iced tea before returning to your fun. One gulp is all takes to replenish the energy lost and you turn around to head back but freeze in your spot at the sight of Joe with his hand out, asking you for a dance.

"Seriously?" You're not surprised but your brows shoot up in question.

"It's my way of saying 'I need to talk to you'. "

"We can do that outside." You gesture to the vacant space yet Joe insists that he dances with you as you talk. You purse your lips together, letting him take your hand and he pulls you along with him almost too abruptly, eliciting a ticklish squeal from you.

"Don't do that!" You whine as you both settle among the multitude of dancing people. He lowers his head in laughter and twirls you under his arm, drawing you close afterwards. You rest one hand on his shoulder as he holds up the other. "Where's the fun in talking outside now, huh?"

"Alright," you grin ridiculously, spotting Rami and Lucy in each other's arms as they slow dance near the mini stage, looking and feeling at one with the other. "Hey, doesn't it just warm you?" You poke Joe and gesture to the  newlyweds. He peers over at them and hums in a heartwarming way. "Yeah. Man, it's like they're communicating with each other merely through their close-knit heartbeats."

"Speaking of communication," you clear your throat and give him a direct look, " what did you want to talk about?"

He snaps out from gauging at the two and leads you on a gentle sway as he swallows, increasing the volume of his voice just loud enough to cut through the music and for you to hear. "Right. About the thing during the ceremony," you immediately catch on to what he's trying to say and interrupt his next words.

"Okay, thanks for implying, but are you kidding me? Giving me stroke by hiding Ben's attendance?"

"It was for dramatic effect," your eyes flatten puzzlingly at his defense. "What was so dramatic in that besides the awkward... staring?" You know the truth and it really wasn't awkward; in fact it felt like time dilated between you both.

Joe ping-pongs his gaze from one end of the place to the other and back to you. "You paused after 'awkward'. You liked it." The smile on his face teasing you. He's really that sensitive to the nuance of your voice, making it easier for him to figure out how you actually feel about anything.

You evade his prying look and clear your throat, trying to keep up with the transition of the rhythmic music to a slow tune. "So what if I did?" You mumble intentionally.

"Nothing bad. Just Ben wouldn't stop fidgeting in his spot after seeing you. He was this," he makes small jerky movements with his upper body as to imitate Ben's inability to keep still during the ceremony, "antsy and I was this close to losing it."

You snort as you let an explosive laugh overcome you, recollecting yourself shortly as you are flattered by Joe's report. "I felt the same. It took every cell in my body to prevent myself from launching at him honestly."

"I'm glad we sat in separate tables or else neither of you would function like regular...human beings." The grin on Joe's face fades in the same manner as his last words, staring off at a figure approaching from behind you. He regains his voice in a matter of seconds, only with a sly twinkle in his eyes this time.

"You okay?" You ask him, slowly removing your hand from his chest and he nods vigorously, taking position to whirl you off but with a sneaky twist.

"I'm fine. Just... Gwilym wants to dance with you and he's right behind you so I'm going to spin you off to him, sound good?" He lifts your arm up and you shrug in agreement, going with what Joe's planning to do.

"Ally oop!" He twirls you around and releases your hand just in time for you to cling onto a firm frame, giggling at the rush you felt. "Hey Gwil! Good catch, that was a strong spin-" You take a hard pause the second you lift your eyes up with the expectation of meeting Gwilym's sapphire blues, greeting a pair of forest, green orbs instead and it becomes more than what you've bargained for. His veiny arms have caught you with ease and you're sinking, both literally and metaphorically, your arms awkwardly thrown over his shoulders for support.

He helps you regain your balance and smiles the smile you had craved to behold again, breathing out your name like he hasn't said it in a long time. "Y/N, hi."

You find your voice just in time to reply. "Ben...h-hi." He's looking quite good in an all white attire. His white dress shirt is tucked in and has three buttons undone, exposing a lot of his clavicle and a preview of his pecs and the way his white pants just hangs loosely around his legs– you've lost the proper words to describe the sight.

Joe, you crafty asshole.

[punkscowardschampions]

Buster & Rio

Buster: You up yet? Rio: 😴 Rio: Just about Buster: [sends her loads of pics from Nancy's camera roll cos my idea is she's still asleep and he stole her camera to look through] Rio: She got loads of good ones Rio: so sneaky with that 📸 Buster: And your good side Buster: Even after all those drinks Rio: All my sides are good 😘 Rio: I can handle my drink too, tah Buster: You did alright Rio: Shut up that you drank any more or was any less wobbly, like Buster: I did drink more though Buster: I know 'cause I was the one stealing 'em Rio: Well then that's just bad manners Rio: should be ashamed of yourself, McKenna Buster: Shame's for pussies Buster: I did what I did and I don't feel bad Rio: 😏 Rio: could at least pretend you're a little bit sorry for short changing me Buster: You obviously weren't if a second ago you were trying to argue that you drank as much as me Buster: You had a good night and you didn't miss out if that's what you reckon, like Rio: Whatever Rio: it was fun Buster: Yeah Rio: All things considered Rio: no one else was concerned about handling their drink, obvs Buster: Never are Rio: Not a party 'til someone makes a tit of themselves Buster: Who you gonna give the first prize too though? Rio: 🤔 Rio: be rude not to give it to birthday boy Buster: Too late to write it in his card but he can still have it Rio: Just what he wanted Rio: better than a 10 years over midlife crisis Buster: Mid life depends when you die Rio: You're giving him 100? Buster: 'Course Rio: Pop that in the card Rio: cute Buster: Stop calling me cute Rio: It's not you it's what you said Buster: 😏 Buster: I said it so it's me Rio: Fine then 🤐 Buster: Nice try Rio: 🙄 Buster: You gonna sulk for long 'cause I'm bored of being the only one awake here Rio: You gonna be nice to me Buster: If you're gonna take me somewhere good Rio: I'M not gonna do you dirty Rio: I have manners Buster: That's not really selling it to me, babe Buster: Make it sound fun, yeah? Rio: I don't need to sell it Rio: you're bored Buster: Come on Rio: You come on Rio: when have I ever let you down Buster: Do you want me to be nice or do you want me to answer that? Rio: I'm ignoring you Rio: be ready, I'll come to yours Buster: I am ready Buster: Not a fucking amateur Rio: You're gonna need to prove that Buster: How? Rio: If you're asking, then you definitely are an amateur Rio: You've got time to work something out Rio: gotta do breakfast Buster: I was doing manners Rio: What happened to fun? Buster: Cheers for admitting I'm right and you can't be polite and not boring Rio: You can't Rio: it doesn't suit you Buster: It don't suit you either Rio: Why not Buster: You know why not Buster: I'm not feeding you compliments for breakfast Rio: Now THAT is boring Rio: and mean Rio: 👎 Buster: You've got time to work for 'em Buster: Like I said, I'm no amateur, babe Rio: Does Nance wanna come? Buster: I don't know Buster: Do you want me to wake her up? Rio: Up to you Rio: I don't mind Buster: Will she wanna go? Wherever it is you're taking me Rio: Probably not Rio: I'll see if one of my 'rents will take them imaginosity or something Buster: Alright Rio: She'll like that more Buster: Yeah Buster: Junior'll probably be happier if she don't fuck off with us for ages as well Rio: Right, exactly Rio: they can be cute nerds Buster: They were 🤓s last night Rio: They missed each other Buster: Don't encourage 'em Rio: Don't be mean Rio: at least she was smiling, right Buster: I'll give you that Rio: Shame they can't hang more often Buster: It's not like she'll have to struggle to write him a letter like when granddad was a kid Rio: 😂 okay he's not that old Rio: still Rio: he's so shy Rio: be nice if he had someone Buster: Don't Buster: She better make friends like the few she had in Cambs Rio: What do you mean, don't Rio: I can't adopt her, calm down, like Buster: I mean don't make me think about how she might not Buster: All the shit that can go wrong Rio: She'll be alright Rio: she'll have the time to Buster: 'Course Rio: at least you're going at the start Rio: midway through is the worst Buster: Yeah, fuck that Rio: what are you wearing Rio: need to see if its sensible Buster: [selfie because of course he would] Rio: 👍 Buster: Show me yours Rio: Steady Rio: [but does 'cos was just a shameless excuse, like what you doing] Buster: I've figured it out Rio: You what Buster: I know where we're going Buster: But don't worry I'll look surprised when we get there Rio: How Rio: 🤔 Buster: Just that good Rio: Bollocks Rio: such a bullshitter Buster: Where did your manners go? Rio: If you're gonna lie, then all bets are off, like Buster: Sounds fun Rio: If that's how you want it Buster: How do you want it? Rio: Do you care? Buster: I asked, didn't I? Rio: Can play 20 questions later Buster: Yeah Buster: Can do whatever we want Rio: 🤞 Rio: That's how I want it Buster: Me too Rio: If anyone asks we're just going park yeah Buster: Nobody's gonna ask me Buster: Don't worry Rio: Get it Rio: even if they were up, already got the headache and mouth too dry to say much Buster: I don't wanna talk about them Rio: Okay Rio: got it Buster: The state of 'em last night was embarrassing Rio: Everyone was though Rio: and you know, no one's judging Buster: Yeah, everyone was but you still know what I mean Rio: yeah Rio: I'll make you forget about it Rio: you'll see Buster: If anyone can Rio: You can trust me Buster: I know Rio: Not just a useless 👸 waiting to be saved Buster: I know Rio: though having woodland creature pals or mice to do chores would be well helpful rn Buster: If you'd have said last night we could've caught some out by the bins Buster: Still, I'll see what I can do Rio: Could catch a lot out by those bins Rio: minging Buster: 'Course I'd risk it for you though 👸 Rio: My hero Rio: 😍🙄 Buster: You'd have to trust me too Rio: You know I do Buster: Probably not one of your better ideas Buster: But yeah Rio: You're the one who's anti being wrong Rio: I'll survive Buster: Good Rio: and how do you know trusting me ain't a bad one for you Buster: 'Cause I know you Rio: You're not that bad Rio: I told you, not scared of you Buster: And I told you, don't be Rio: I'm not Rio: you're Buster: Don't tell me Buster: I don't wanna hear what you think of me Rio: Are you scared? Buster: I'm not scared of anything Buster: Ever Rio: Then why don't you wanna hear Buster: 'Cause then I'll know Buster: Like it or not Rio: I don't know what I was going to say Rio: so you're safe Buster: You mean you're safe Rio: If you say so Buster: You are Buster: From whatever you might have said and no take backs Buster: I was never in any danger Rio: That'd be why you stopped me Rio: for my own sake Buster: 🤴 Rio: 🤖 Buster: If you say so Rio: mhm Buster: Come out with it then Rio: Why should I now Buster: You've got shit you're holding back Buster: Why should you? Rio: that's a joke Buster: Say it Rio: I'm on my way Buster: All the more reason Buster: You keep saying you ain't scared of me Buster: Prove you're not Rio: Not you I'm worried about Buster: Why are you worried at all? Rio: Don't be thick Buster: Don't say one thing and do another Rio: What? Buster: Tell me Rio: Why have you done a compete 180 Buster: I ain't done anything Rio: You said don't tell me, so I'm not Buster: And you didn't drop it when I said that Buster: So finish what you started Rio: you first Buster: Girls always go first Buster: I've got no manners and I know it Rio: No balls Rio: don't pussy out Buster: Fuck you Rio: Told you Rio: we never last long Buster: 'Cause you know all these languages and you still can't say fuck all to me Rio: because there ain't no language in the world where what I wanna say is fucking okay Rio: okay Buster: Fuck this world then Buster: We made our own when we were little anyway Rio: We aren't little anymore Rio: we can't just pretend we don't know better Buster: We can do whatever we want Buster: We both agreed to that before I even got here Rio: It's different when you're here Rio: harder when we're actually together Buster: So turn around Buster: Don't be coming to my door Rio: No Rio: come on, we can do what we've been doing Rio: don't need to spoil it Buster: You just said we can't Buster: Lucky if we last the day Rio: Of course we can Rio: we just need to leave it alone Buster: Fine Rio: It can be Rio: Please Rio: we can still have fun Buster: Fuck it Buster: You're on your way Rio: It would be rude to turn me away Rio: unbelievably bad manners Rio: and I could just be awkward and say I'm there to see Nance so Buster: You can see her if you want but you said you wanted to have fun so Buster: You'll have more of that with me Rio: I wanna see you Buster: Okay Rio: Mates? Rio: for the holidays, like Buster: Yeah Buster: Like old times Rio: Right Rio: I wonder what happened to that boy Buster: I wonder if he's played dares since Rio: Probably Rio: he was always up for it Buster: He didn't think we'd be up for it though Buster: Probably weirded him right out Rio: He shouldn't have said it Rio: clue is in the name, whole point of the game, like Buster: He'd been trying to get me to pussy out of playing for ages Buster: Don't you remember what a cunt he was? Rio: Oh, not really Rio: he was alright to me Rio: bit of a hanger-on type but other than that Buster: 'Course he was alright to you Rio: 'cos I'm not a lad Buster: 'Cause he is Rio: You used to reckon every lad fancied me Buster: They all did Buster: 🐸💋 Rio: 😂 Rio: he might've grown into his face Buster: We can use it for a punching bag Buster: Gotta start teaching you some time Rio: Awh, poor old whathisname Buster: I doubt you'll hurt him that bad, babe Rio: 😒 Rio: You wanna watch out Rio: my aim might be off Buster: I'm not ticklish, like Buster: I'll be fine Rio: Such a dick Rio: be your fault Rio: shit teacher, like Buster: I'll be a great teacher Buster: It don't mean I can give you power you ain't got Rio: Shut up, I'm not weak Buster: I didn't call you weak Buster: There's just no way you'd be able to knock me out Rio: Easy Rio: especially if you keep 'motivating' me like this Buster: What do you wanna bet? Buster: I'll let you try at the end of summer Rio: 🤔 Rio: what have you got that I want Buster: Tell me what you want and I'll get it Buster: If I don't already have it, which I probably do Rio: Alright, that's the bet Rio: I'll have thought of my prize by the end of summer Rio: you can do but don't dream too big 'cos it won't happen 💔 Buster: 😂 Buster: I'll make it easy for you and say you only have to knock me over not out Buster: Even with that fighting chance you won't win whatever you think you want Buster: So don't think too hard Rio: You can't cut corners, you still have to show me everything properly Rio: and at this rate, getting to punch you will be prize enough 👌 Buster: I'll teach you everything I know, exactly like I said I would Rio: Good Buster: We can start as soon as we get where we're going Rio: Can we? Rio: could be going to a library for all you know, boy Buster: For all I care Rio: 😏 Buster: Are you scared of librarians? Rio: Don't be stupid Rio: as if I'd actually take you to a library to try to distract you Buster: You could distract me anywhere Buster: But cheers for not picking a library, babe Rio: Challenge accepted on that one too Buster: It's not a challenge Rio: Come let me in Buster: [does or rather let's himself out cos no need to stay around the baze gaff] Rio: [run kids run 'fore anyone can think to stop you, like] Buster: [he should give her a matchbox with some kind of bug creature in that he caught cos 👸 and she said she wanted one lol] Rio: [that's so cute, bye, just getting some grass and dandelions and putting it in there like let's ride] Buster: [I hope it's not a gross bug lol but yeah I thought it's a good way to show they are still little like] Rio: [she wouldn't be eww about it so its fine, Ali is her mum, just taking his hand so they can run to the nearest dart thing] Buster: [we see you handholding when you don't need to and we stan] Rio: [at least you don't have the longest bus ride ever, the dedication that she got here thanks lol] Buster: [I never even thought about that like omg boy she must really love you she's literally a child and she did that early af in the day after a night of it] Rio: [thanks for not kidnapping her everyone lmao] Buster: [when I had my 1st hangover at 10 I was literally in bed all the next day like] Rio: [my boo say not for you sir] Buster: [only for you my waffle wife] Rio: ['you had breakfast?'] Buster: [looks at her like don't be stupid because 🤴s don't make their own breakfast and 10 year old boys who don't give a fuck clearly don't so no he has not lol] Rio: ['we can get pancakes' height of excitement live your best also a throw forward to when you go get breakfast in London] Buster: [remember when he made her crepes though and it was sexual as hell] Rio: [omg yes I do, that's like soon I think they were 12? something like that I'm sure, all I'm saying is you do a terrible job of ignoring each other] Buster: [god bless but in the now he'd be buzzing cos she's just treating him normal which his friends and Nancy aren't] Rio: [just chatting about all the things she's gonna get on her pancakes like when you're a kid and you go ham on the pizza hut ice cream and it's unedible] Buster: [omg yes such a mood and it'd lowkey turn competitive cos he's a boy who needs to flex like I'm gonna get this and this] Rio: [just loling when it gets outta hand] Buster: [we all loling and having a fun time cos deserved soz for not letting you 3rd wheel Nance but also not soz] Rio: [we all know that was shameless like no no you go do this instead, everyone catch yourselves on so blatant] Buster: [literally what are all of you playing at we can excuse baze for obvs reasons and cali cos 10 kids but the rest of y'all step it up tbh] Rio: [at least she'd know all the swag food places in town even now, should be like a cereal cafe vibe so they really can go ham with toppings, also probably there so off you get 'cos baze are pretty central] Buster: [yaaaaas open the door for her boy and help her out cos she's smol you gotta] Rio: [does a lil curtsey 'cos running with this 👸🤴 mood] Buster: [opening the door to the place too and pulling her chair out etc cos likewise] Rio: [imagine working there you'd be like aww, hence the waitress should give them a freebie or something and be nice af] Buster: [Why am I emosh about a fictional waitress shipping them bye] Buster: [omg they should go back and take saint as a bub and she can still be there] Rio: [AWH] Buster: [they'd be on such a sugar high rn it'd be adorable] Rio: [fight off any sign of a hangover with sugar] Buster: [they are gonna crash so hard later] Rio: [😴] Buster: [that could be so cute though if they do together and a nice flashforward to when they did when he was wrecked in a couple of years] Rio: [hit all those feels] Buster: [for now go and window shop for a bit until you actually go in somewhere swag and she tries something on and comes out and shows him even though she doesn't need to and you die boy and hit her with all them compliments so she can die too] Rio: [a moment, no hiding that lads] Buster: [shame she can't take a selfie in that 🔥 lewk for him to pine over later but they are meant to be at the park] Rio: [I mean she can take one but you can't realy ask for it unless you wanna be that obvious lmao] Buster: [unless she's sneaky and posts it but after the fact like only they know it happened then idk] Rio: [always an option, not like anyone is checked in appaz ] Buster: [that's the tea] Buster: [we could also let them actually go to the park later like maybe they get picked up from there so it looks legit but while they are there he can start to teach her how to 🥊 too so] Rio: [yas, we know it's gonna be inte nse and a moment so] Buster: [and they can take loads of cute selfies together so it looks like they've been there all day but really also just cos they wanna] Rio: [#shameless] Buster: [just look everyone we're so trustworthy don't worry about us bye] Rio: [let us go out more thank you] Buster: [do we wanna skip to later like maybe when they in the car on the way home #sneaky or is there any more we wanna say/do that happened?] Rio: [I reckon that's lots of moments for one day, I'm good to skip] Buster: [who should we say is picking them up and if it's Cali who else is in the car kid wise is my question lol] Rio: [probably cali, assuming everyone else is too fragile from last night, they could be taking Nancy home as well from whatever they went and did in the end, then probably the toddler aged ones 'cos extra and love to be involved so maybe Pablo, Grace and Janis like hello! lol] Buster: [sounds real when you're just in the car putting up pics of the girl you love and trying not to be too extra with your captions like] Rio: [better chat to Nancy gurl since you shamelessly uninvited her so guilty but no regrets really] Buster: [Nancy should ask if she can stay over at their house and Buster just like 👀 waiting to see if Cali will say yes cos shamelessly wants her to] Rio: [they'd probably umm and ahh 'cos the baze situation but I say they should ask baze when they get there and they'd say yes 'cos she's a helpful bitch and distract the kids tah] Buster: [Buster would be so buzzing cos he didn't have to ask her to stay but she still is] Rio: [just like love it when a plan comes together, a shameless look at him like yas] Buster: Not gonna stop being a 👸 if we stay up all night, are you? Rio: Oi, I suit green Rio: just watch your da's car don't turn into a 🎃 Buster: I know you do Buster: He don't suit red as well as me though and he'd be 😡 if anything happened to his car Rio: 😂 Rio: call in a favour with my fairy godmother and 🤞 Buster: Depends how distracted we need him to be later on Buster: So don't yet Rio: Imagine how weird he'd look if we shaved his eyebrows off Buster: [actually lols like excuse him everybody] Rio: [😏 but also telling the kids some joke 'cos you know they'd be like WHAT WHAT] Buster: [just looking at her back like 😏 cos she swagged it] Rio: What have you actually got in mind then Buster: Don't you like surprises? Rio: Sometimes Rio: not if you're coming for my eyebrows or something though Buster: You can trust me Buster: I won't touch your eyebrows Rio: Alright Rio: then I'll pretend to be surprised Buster: You're gonna be surprised for real Buster: Wait and see Rio: I'll try Buster: You don't have to when I'm putting in the effort for you Rio: Try and wait Rio: I mean Buster: You won't have to wait that long Buster: Nance can never stay up as late as me Rio: Don't being SO busy make you SO tired too, like Buster: Sometimes Buster: But being around you wakes me back up Rio: I feel that too Rio: not just all the sugar we had either Buster: There's so much left we've gotta do before summer ends Buster: And I've gotta do it all with you Rio: We will Rio: got ages, it'll be the best Rio: we can do something every day, like Buster: Let's go to the beach soon Rio: Yeah Rio: do you reckon we could get there and back without getting caught or Buster: 'Course Buster: It'll be easy Rio: Then we won't need to bring all the others Buster: It'll be loads better if it's just us Buster: One day I'm gonna have my own private beach but you can come Buster: 'Cause you're my best friend Rio: Promise now so you can't change your mind Buster: [does an IRL pinky promise lil link up of their fingers there and then excuse him everyone] Rio: [so buzzing] Rio: I'll cheer for you at matches then Buster: Yeah? Buster: Only when we're older and I'm richer or now too? Rio: Now too Rio: but I'll have to come visit your new house for that Buster: You will Rio: Good Rio: I wanna see your new rooms too Buster: Nance's will probably be boring Buster: Mine won't Rio: What colour are you gonna do Buster: Blue Rio: That'll look sick Rio: I hope when we come back for good, I get to do my room how I want it Buster: Will you get to have your own? Rio: I think so Rio: there's lots of rooms they just need sorting Buster: I'll help you 💪 Rio: then you can stay over ours Buster: Yeah Buster: It's a really short flight, I'm gonna come back whenever I want Rio: Do Rio: I almost forgot how much fun it is Rio: having you around Buster: I'm not letting you forget again Buster: Not even almost Rio: That's alright with me Rio: I don't wanna Buster: Good Buster: 'Cause I want us to stay best friends, okay? Buster: Forever Rio: and ever and ever Rio: no fairytale shit, I mean it Buster: So do I Buster: [giving her a look so she knows he does cos we all know what besties is code for here] Rio: [when you're so 😳 but also 😊 Nancy like hello???] Rio: We should find the scariest film we can tonight Buster: Definitely Buster: Just don't let Nance pick Rio: Will she be too 😱? Buster: Probably not Buster: Her taste is shitter than mine though Buster: Last film she chose had more subtitles than plot Rio: Such a cute nerd Rio: but summer = no homework so Rio: 👎 Soz babe Buster: 😏 Buster: I'll always be your fave now Rio: See what she's gonna over by way of private beaches and shit first Buster: She needs people to 📷 privacy ain't really gonna be on offer, like Rio: Unless she wants to take those kind of photos Buster: It's Nance Rio: True Buster: [chat to your sister boy cos you love her really] Rio: [lbr gonna need to entertain yours they'd be peak annoying] Buster: [oh lord Grace especially] Rio: [a 3 year old with no chill] Buster: [get them out of that car ASAP Cali step on it] Rio: can we get pizza Buster: Yeah Rio: 😁 Buster: But we're getting our own 'cause Nance won't grow the fuck up and stop being a vegetarian Rio: 😂 Rio: you can get whatever Rio: I'm not fussy Buster: You have to get what you want too Rio: Alright Rio: [sneaky looks forever] Buster: Good Buster: [such a look bye] Rio: Maybe we can all sleep in the lounge Buster: When did you start having properly good ideas? Buster: Just today like? Rio: Um always Rio: you just haven't been paying attention Buster: [another look cos we know he has] Rio: [look like well then] Buster: Smallest goes in the middle Rio: You definitely just made that up Buster: It makes sense if I did or I didn't Buster: You just don't need as much space, babe Rio: Just don't hog the covers Buster: I've already taught you enough 🥊 to stop me Rio: 😏 Rio: would keep us warm Buster: And a 👸 shouldn't ever be cold Rio: Practically a beheading offense, that Buster: Exactly Buster: And I'm not allowed to die yet Rio: Never Buster: [does another pinky promise like it's so casual] Rio: Will accept faux fur though Rio: don't have to murder any mink for me Buster: Well now your birthday present ain't gonna be a surprise Rio: 😂 Rio: my parents would probably throw paint at me, like so tah Buster: No animals have died, I'll make sure they know Rio: so considerate Buster: 🤴s have gotta be Buster: It's written in Rio: and best friends Rio: what are you gonna do for your birthday Buster: I don't know Buster: We were gonna go on holiday but mum and dad might say no now Rio: Maybe by then they'll be up for it again Buster: Me and Nance can't agree where to go anyway Rio: Typical Rio: where do you wanna go? Buster: She never wants to do anything I wanna do Buster: I've suggested loads of shit like scuba diving or surfing or skiing Rio: Maybe compromise Rio: there will be places where you can be doing that and she can do what she wants as well Buster: Do you wanna come? Rio: Your parents aren't gonna take me with yous Buster: They will if I say I want you to Rio: What if by then you have a new London best friend you'd rather take Buster: I'll probably have new friends but none I like as much as you Rio: okay, ask them Rio: when you know if you're going or not Rio: and I'll ask mine if they'll let me Buster: Alright Rio: [let you get out this car now like byeeee] Buster: [get in that house and fight over what pizza you want lads] Rio: [live your best sleepover lives, Nancy somehow oblivious to the vibe god bless] Buster: [love that oblivious lesbian] Rio: [wanna skip to later when Nancy is asleep or is there anything else?] Buster: [I think we can cos we know what the vibe is] Rio: Are you awake? Buster: Are you ready to be surprised? Rio: Go on Buster: [okay so my idea is baze have a hot tub in their dublin house but like he's made it cute/like a little beach vibe because who knows when they'll actually get to go and like sneakily set it up while she was distracted doing whatever with Nance over the course of this sleepover in dribs and drabs and like made cocktails for them as best as a little kid can and decorated and shit] Buster: Come on Rio: [That's the cutest shit I've ever heard like #overwhelmed does not begin to describe] Buster: [just looking at her like are you surprised/do you like it] Rio: [when you're like how do I avoid kissing you right now tbh] Buster: [forever the mood] Buster: [drink your drink girl it's okay] Rio: ['How'd you- WHEN did you-'] Buster: [😏 cos so proud of himself rn for being so #sneaky] Rio: [having to give him a massive hug 'cos that happy 'This is so cool, Buster'] Buster: [hugging her back way longer than you need to because we're hiding behind friendship so hard atm and we all know he wants to kiss her as much as she wants to kiss him] Rio: [make it more tense by literally getting in a hot tub like not calling you fat babe but Nancy's costume isn't gonna fit you right] Buster: [but it's that or getting in with your pjs on like this is all the boys I've loved before and risking them going see through] Rio: [ooh yeah I mean, an option] Buster: [and frankly a mood]                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                       nb Rio: [doing it, 'cos then you'll have to find her a t-shirt or something like] Buster: [casual moment under towels and blankets because oh no we didn't think that through or did we and now you're gonna have to wear my clothes what a casual situation] Rio: [honestly like okay do you both wanna die or] Buster: [we're so evil] Buster: [at least the drinks would be good cos he copied what he's seen baze do] Rio: [apart from the undeniable sexual tension, they'd be having a great time] Buster: [a hot tub is the literal best when you're a child that's the tea] Rio: [and now] Buster: [tbh] Buster: [don't get too carried away splashing etc and wake anyone up though like] Rio: [got to be so sneaky rn] Buster: [so many secrets for so many years bye] Rio: [have fun with that] Buster: [live your best lives while you can kiddos] Rio: [oh I was thinking she should've got him something touristy and stereotypically irish in town like a teddy and imma just put that on his bed space] Buster: [why am I so emosh about them as kids rn like calm down me] Buster: [it should have an irish football kit on or something cos that sporty bitch he is] Rio: [deffo or rugby, they're good at that] Buster: [yasss] Rio: know he's not blue but Buster: I'll still find a place for him Buster: Don't worry Rio: You can put him away, it's alright Rio: just a bit of Dubo to take with you Buster: I wanna see him every day if I can't see you Rio: I'm gonna miss you so much Buster: I'll miss you too Rio: shame I can't convince my parents they need to move to London next, eh Buster: Or I can't convince mine to just stay here Rio: should've got them something from the giftshop too Buster: I'm glad you only got something for me though Rio: I had a good day with you, not them so Buster: I won't tell Nance Rio: Good Rio: she'd be so jealous, obvs 😏 Buster: 'Course Rio: I'm glad the surprise was just for me too Buster: This whole summer is for you Rio: I'll take it Buster: I'm giving it to you Buster: Like it or not Rio: I want it Rio: you know that Buster: Yeah Rio: [thank god those 😍 are hidden in the dark now] Buster: [saving yourselves because he'd be wearing his too so] Rio: what else do you wanna do Buster: We have to go tourist watching of course Buster: See how they compare to the London ones soon enough, like Rio: I reckon the Dubo ones have more craic but are well more offensive with the stereotypes, like Buster: They can't wait to tell you all about their Irish blood even if they don't have any Buster: None of the tourists in the capital are trying to call themselves cockney Rio: Exactly Rio: still, wherever they are, you can tell the yanks a load of bullshit and they'll buy it Buster: Sell 'em a load of bullshit and they'll buy it as well Buster: But speaking of Irish blood I've thought of the best dare for you Rio: What? Buster: I dare you to dive off the rocks at the forty foot Buster: [basically it's this famous outdoor swimming spot year round that's lowkey a bit dangerous but nearby enough they could easily get there and therefore had to] Rio: Alright Rio: I'm down Buster: You have to do it properly Buster: Don't just jump in the water Buster: It don't count as a dare done if you don't go off the rocks Rio: I know Rio: I'll do it, not chicken Buster: I know Rio: We'll have to go when there's not loads and loads people about Rio: I'm very cute and saveable Buster: You don't need saving Buster: But if you did, I'll do it Rio: Tell that to concerned/nosy adults 🙄 Buster: I will Buster: [gets closer to her without even meaning to do it because] Rio: [a really quiet 'hey' 'cos don't be waking Nancy up] Buster: [just looking at her in the dark like 👀 how did I get this close oops] Rio: [a lowkey staring contest rn] Buster: [saying her name really quietly like] Rio: [makes a tiny noise that's somewhere between oh and a whimper] Buster: [let's say they hear a noise which could be outside or upstairs but it's enough to cockblock him from kissing her cos must be done since he'd be literally so close to her by now] Rio: [dramatically pretending to be asleep the way you do as a kid 'til the coast is clear but the moment is gone] Buster: [thanks foxes or whatever the fuck] Rio: [just laying there like well, shit] Buster: [you know he'd get up cos FUMING that I've cockblocked him when he was leaning so far in that there's no pretending that anything else was about to happen] Rio: [when you know there was a noise but you're still like oh no, I fucked that up] Buster: [All I can imagine is him getting his shit and going to his room because he is that dramatic] Rio: Night then Buster: Yeah Rio: yeah Buster: [isn't being quiet or chill rn soz everyone] Rio: You're gonna wake them up Rio: what do you need Buster: Unlikely Buster: When they sleep it's really hard to wake 'em Buster: These days Rio: Not a challenge though Buster: Can be Buster: If you want Rio: Not the best idea you've ever had Buster: It was your turn to have 'em Buster: For today Rio: Then listen to me, like Buster: Don't tell me what to do in my own house, like Rio: Alright Buster: I can do whatever I want Buster: [no you can't boy and that's the problem lol lol lol] Rio: And why do you wanna Buster: I can't sleep why should they all get to? Rio: Does it make you feel more normal again Rio: if they're shouting at you Buster: Shut up Rio: That would make sense, is all Buster: Don't make sense of me Rio: Why? Buster: You're not smarter than me, I don't need you to Rio: Who said I'm doing it for you Buster: You're saying it to me Buster: Like you know something I don't Rio: I just asked you why Buster: You're talking about making things normal as if I could Buster: But however loud I am there's meant to be a crying baby keeping everyone up Rio: That doesn't mean you wouldn't try Rio: still Buster: They shouldn't be sleeping Buster: None of us should be Rio: What do you want to do Buster: There's fuck all I can do Rio: What are you going to do Buster: I don't know Rio: You don't have to figure it out tonight Buster: Cheers Rio: You want them to wake up Buster: Why are we playing twenty questions all of a fucking sudden? Rio: Not a question Rio: wake 'em up Rio: but they're not gonna make it better like you want Rio: parents are very disapointing Buster: There ain't no making it better Buster: Even you can't Buster: I only forgot for a day Buster: [lowkey trashing his room cos angry and sad and remember when he did before and she was there then as well how poetic] Rio: [emotions] Rio: You can't forget about him Buster: It doesn't matter if I can't, I still have to Rio: That don't work Buster: You don't know that it won't Rio: It's impossible Buster: Nothing's impossible for me Rio: Until it is and now what Buster: You're wrong Rio: Wish I was Buster: You are Rio: You wouldn't be up there trashing your room if I was Buster: Fuck off Buster: It's your fault Rio: Yeah? Buster: Yeah Rio: That's alright then Rio: easily solved Buster: You can't make me forget everything and then tell me it's a stupid idea Buster: Make me happy and then make me angry Rio: It isn't a stupid idea Rio: you aren't forgetting you're just carrying on Buster: It's the same thing Rio: I'm not trying to make you angry Buster: I know Rio: are you okay Rio: like, you aren't hurt or anything Buster: [comes back down cos he's not gonna sleep in that carnage but just sitting on the stairs like well this is fine] Rio: [nods her head in the direction of their sleeping situation and gets up 'I'll go in Nancy's room'] Buster: [comes over to her because wants to be close to her always 'Don't'] Rio: [casually checking him over but also handily not making eye contact 'cos can't 'you have to sleep'] Buster: [just making her lie back down and snuggling her because shameless] Rio: [allowing herself to get there 'cos he clearly needs to 'Buster, I just-' but shaking her head 'it won't happen again, okay'] Buster: [holding onto her like his life depends on it 'okay, it won't happen again' very convincing boy well done] Rio: [just stroking his hair] Buster: [calming down as she does 'Sorry'] Rio: [shhing him gently] Buster: [is he crying or isn't he, there's no way to know] Rio: [just telling him he's alright over and over] Buster: ['I didn't mean it, it's not your fault'] Rio: ['They can be two separate issues, it's not important'] Buster: ['it is to me and you are to me, don't fuck off, I don't want you to'] Rio: [holds him tighter like I'm still here] Buster: [literally just wrapped around each other by this point] Rio: ['I'm sorry too'] Buster: ['You ain't allowed to be 'cause you didn't do anything' but his voice is soft not his confrontational one] Rio: [shakes head 'cause we both know what almost happened but not putting words to that right now] Buster: [holds her tighter like I mean it 'cause blaming himself entirely for that as well since he was the one doing all that leaning] Rio: ['we didn't even get caught, it's so fine' kinda giving away that you don't regret it there but shh] Buster: ['we won't get caught going to the beach or the forty foot either, it'll be the best summer, I promise' just like I love you and I won't ruin this haha] Rio: [reaching out to pinky promise again] Buster: [doing it while we can cos Buster is gonna be a dickhead soon and outgrow being this cute egg RIP] Rio: [rip rip, also realised its edies bday on the 10th btw] Buster: [OMG I forgot how old is she gonna be?] Rio: [7] Buster: [should we let them snooze or is there any more feels we wanna inflict on ourselves?] Rio: [Hmm, probably sleep or this could get outta hand so easily lol] Buster: [Good point]

[radicalseabies]

Why do people like Bakugou? I've not finished the series yet, but does he get a redemption arc or mellow out or something later on? Idk I'd like to know why the guy who told Deku to kill himself and bullied him and others has so much love.

y’know, the mangaka himself, horikoshi, once said in an interview he’s actually surprised at how much people ended up loving bakugou, because he was written to be such a horrible, unlikable person. and well, i mean, he is!! but imo, unlikable people can make for some of the most interesting characters in fiction.

first things first, bakugou is a very problematic individual, there’s simply no denying that. he’s loud, obnoxious, aggressive, extremely rude, and yes, he once even told deku to kill himself, which is a truly despicable thing to do. but something that’s very important to understand about all this is that he’s actually very rarely, if ever, praised or rewarded for this disgusting behaviour. his rude outbursts are, more often than not, played for laughs at his expense, his callous actions have cost him on numerous occasions (and it’s happening more as the story progresses), and almost nobody in the class likes him as a person. everybody thinks he’s horrible and unpleasant to be around, and his old friends from middle-school are even shown calling him out shortly after telling deku to kill himself, saying that he went overboard. (as well as deku remarking to himself that it was a very stupid and awful thing to say).

but in spite of all his terrible, negative traits, this boy is also really strong, and smart as hell. he’s got the 3rd highest grades in the whole class, meaning he’s serious about his school work, and he’s unshakably committed to his goal of becoming the strongest hero, and he’s got the strength, fighting skill, and drive to back it all up. he’s constantly trying his absolute best, and while his UA classmates all think he’s a complete asshole, they DO respect his strength, his keen intellect, his skill for tactics and battle, his passion for victory, and it actually inspires them to get them fired up, wanting to do the best that they can do as well, whether they like him as a person or not.

in answer to your question, i think one of the biggest factors playing into the fans love of his character is his backstory. he doesn’t have your typical tragic backstory that an angry, aggressive character of his archetype usually has. there’s no dark, traumatic past. no villains killed his family or anything like that. 

basically, bakugou is mentally ill.

katsuki bakugou was a gifted child who was told constantly from a young age that his quirk was amazing, that he was amazing, and he grew up believing it, believing he was better than others, and it warped him. he grew into a self obsessed, cruel, obnoxious child with a superiority complex, believing himself to be the best and that everyone else around him was just trash. his ego, so twistedly convinced of his own ability and superiority, he detested the idea of ever needing help from anybody, which fed strongly into his hatred and, yes, fear of deku, the only person in his life who ever treated him differently.

“you looked like you were asking for help”

and then he eventually enrolled at UA, and the little world he’d been living in finally came crashing down around him as he was sucker punched with the reality that this whole time he was really just a big fish in a small pond, and his superiority complex began to violently twist into an extreme inferiority complex. the rug had been pulled out from his feet and he was now surrounded by people who were just as capable as him, if not more so, and who, rather than worshipping him as the coolest kid with the coolest quirk, actually thought he was a kind of a douche.

not to mention deku, who he believed to be quirkless and the one person he hated the most, suddenly had a powerful quirk as well, and was now able to compete with and even surpass him in ways he never imagined. had deku been playing him for a fool this whole time??

all this clashed very harshly with everything he had come to believe in so strongly, and, understandably, caused him a lot of extreme confusion, anxiety, resentment, and most notably… Anger. his whole life has turned upside down and he has no idea how to handle it. so, being the person he is, the person his life up until this point had nurtured him into becoming, his natural instinct is now to blindly act out very… (excuse the pun)… Explosively.

he figuratively (and sometimes literally) blasts away anything and everything that doesnt agree with his perceived image of how things should be. he’s spent his whole life believing he was the best so FUCK IT, now he’s GOING TO BE THE GOD DAMN BEST!! his classmates dont like him/make fun of him/think he’s a dickhead?? WHATEVER, SHUT UP YOU DAMN NERDS!! I DONT WANT ANYTHING TO DO WITH YOU ANYWAY!! deku, the useless, annoying kid from his childhood is now standing in the way of his goal of being number one?? DEKU YOU DAMN NERD, I WILL DESTROY YOU!!

but… what has this aggressive and anti-social attitude actually achieved for him so far?? honestly, very little… in fact, this behaviour has been doing him a lot more harm than good in the long run, not just professionally, but for his own safety, and his mental health too. (i’d absolutely go into a lot more detail here but you mentioned you’re not up to date so i don’t want to spoil too much)

some people might say this all just sounds like an spoiled brat throwing a temper tantrum, and i guess on some level, that’s probably true. but in my opinion, the bottom line is it’s not his fault. taking something all might says about him in chapter 121 and expanding on it slightly, i believe bakugou ultimately ended up the way he did through the failure of his upbringing. the failure of the adults in his life. if he hadnt been told so continuously from a young age that he was amazing, and then left unchecked for so long, if maybe people were more firm with him about his behaviour from a young age, perhaps he may not have grown into such an angry, messed up person.

but in spite of all of this, as i mentioned earlier, this boy ain’t dumb. he’s smart as hell. it’s taking him a long time to realise it, blinded as he is by all his confusing emotions, and it’s taking him a long time to work through his issues and do anything about it, but he is changing. slowly. slowly, but believably.

bakugou, in my personal opinion, is one of the most interestingly written characters in the series, and it’s been very fascinating and rewarding to watch his gradual development over the course of the story so far. he certainly hasnt done a 180 or anything, he’s still a very loud and very angry boy, but he’s slowly beginning to change in a number of subtle, nuanced ways. bakugou now is remarkably different than bakugou as you see him in chapter 1.

one last thing to consider, is how relatively early we are in the story compared to the grand scheme of things. i believe i heard somewhere that horikoshi once said a while back that the story was roughly 20% done, which lead people to project the manga would run for approximately 500+ chapters, at least, and we’re only at 146 now at the time of this writing. 

bakugou is the 2nd most important character in the story after deku, the protagonist. so much of their development is built around each other, and it wouldnt make sense, narratively or realistically, for a character like bakugou, the way he is and his overall importance to both the story and dekus own development, to change too much in too short amount of time. a character arc like bakugou’s is one that will be played out slowly, but surely, and most importantly, satisfyingly. he will change. little by little. he is changing. he has changed already, and he will continue to change.

sorry this got really long, i just really like bakugou. i understand where some people are coming from when they say they don’t like him. that’s completely fair, liking a character is completely subjective, especially a character as prickly as bakugou is. but i just hope those people know he’s more than what he seems.

[agentlukaofshield]

Hi! Thank you! I love your blog, it makes me happy. :) 💜 Can I ask you something? I'll try. lol I saw the titles and I've notice some parallels with Amy and Rory in the past but that was quite some time ago, not now. Mainly because Amy and Rory are always together and even when they are not it's for a short time or it's an ellipse (like the 2000 years 😊), so 'Together or not at all' really represented their will to stick together no matter what, whereas FS are never together... (part1)

(part2) they just fight to go back to each other, over and over again, it's just boring. At the end they are the opposite because their time together is short and the separation are dragged out and long. Their relationship is offscreen or told by other people... contrary to Rory/Amy. So for me the parallels ended for some time. What do you think ? do you think this title is another clickbait? also I agree with you, nothing support their FS sayings in the writing since a year it pisses me off. ❤️

Under the cut because it’s long and negative. 

Yeah I trust the writers not at all after they burned us so bad with season 4. I know a lot of people have tried to be more positive about how that season went in the months since it aired but idk man. Even after spaceboyfriend, I wasn’t as let down and upset as after season 4. It’s not even that they separated them for the entire season, even though I’m salty about that, it’s that they separated them for seemingly no reason. 

When they started the season off with the conversation between them about how their jobs are pulling them apart, I expected the theme of the season for them to be them choosing each other over their jobs. But that.... didn’t happen. But then the framework happened and I thought “here it is, this is the FS storyline that’s going to pay off this separation! We’re going to see Jemma save Fitz and it will be great!” and then.... they basically took that idea, ripped it up, lit it on fire, and then rubbed the ashes in my face. 

I won’t lie, that whole ending still pisses me off so much. It’s just that they built it up to end one way and then did a 180 at the last second, stole Jemma’s moment and gave it to Radcliffe, and then gave us a single 15 second hug and then separated them again at the start of this season. My more emotional rant about that can be found here.... and I still stand by a lot of those points. 

Going into this season, I didn’t expect anything (and still don’t) in terms of them actually writing FS well. I think they did so much damage to them last year by keeping them apart for the first half of the season, for legit no reason, followed by the literal hell of the framework and it broke any faith I had in them. 

I know a lot of people are expecting them to pay off last season this season but I’m not letting myself hope for that. Given that Fitz won’t be back until 5 at the earliest and the “Together or Not at All” episode is 7.... I’m not pinning my hopes on anything for FS. I mean, it would be stupid for them not to do something with them there but I also thought it would be stupid for Jemma not to wake up Fitz so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ . 

I know that Chloe and the whole cast has been bigging up how “cute” FS are this season but the hard truth is, they did that last year and we got basically nothing. And don’t expect the writers to suddenly have a great insite into what the fandom wants because I highly highly highly doubt they look at fan comments all that much. Most TV writers write without looking at these things because they don’t want them to influence the storyline which I personally think is a terrible idea but it’s true. I think going into spaceboyfriend, they knew it wasn’t great but that wasn’t the case with the framework. I think they truly thought that the framework would be a fan favorite thing and everyone would love it and no one would have a problem with the ending but like ??? that’s not at all what happened. So yeah, I wouldn’t bet on them suddenly being self aware that’s not how they work from what I’ve seen. 

So yeah, I’m sorry this is pretty negative but I have to agree with a lot of what you say. It still baffles me that the first season where they were together was also the season with the least amount of shared screen time, kisses, and ended like that. I know people are fond of saying “but they are endgame don’t worry!” but I don’t find that statement comforting at all. Like, it’s all well and good but at the end of the day, if we don’t get to see any of their relationship, does it matter? Sure I like hearing from OTHER characters how great their relationship is and how much they love each other but I’d like to SEE that on screen. The point of TV is to show not tell and I really felt like season 4 was a lot of telling and no showing and it really strained me as a fan and as a shipper. 

Who knows, maybe season 5 will be great whenever Fitz actually comes back but I’m not holding my breath. I’m expecting most of his “healing” to take place either off screen or with Hunter (which don’t get me wrong, I’m excited to see that team up) and for them to not let Jemma actually say the things that she should and would be in character to say. But yeah, that’s kind of where I’m at. I’m not letting myself get excited, I’m just sticking around with the small hope that maybe, just maybe, this season won’t be as bad as season 4 was.