#Sorry for just going absolutely wild with the headcanons lol

[allylikethecat]

hi queen ally i love soft contemporary gatty and infection verse! feeling it especially in the last week since my ear is still blocked as a consequence of the tour flu (?)

for talk shop tuesday, would you share some headcanons about fictional!george in this universe 🥹

Hello There Kind Anon!

I hope you start feeling better soon! I'm so sorry to hear that your ear is still blocked / painful 😭 I wish I knew how to help! Ear pain / issues are something else in terms of absolute misery and I am so sorry that you're still going through it. HOWEVER, I am so happy that you enjoyed the final chapter of The Christmas Fic! I'm very happy to have finally finished it, better late than never I guess, even though I am also very sad since I love that version of Fictional!Matty and Fictional!George so much - I'm going to miss them :(

In terms of Talk Shop Tuesday (!!! thank you for indulging me in this one I am determined to make it a thing!) hmm head canons for Fictional!George in this one:

When given the option of picking where they are going to eat, Fictional!George will always pick a Thai restaurant (idk if anyone noticed but that's where they were planning on going the day Ava was born in the A&E Fic, and that's also where they had the conversation about going to Belgium for Christmas in The Christmas Fic)

Fictional!George is also the on that drives them everywhere - Fictional!Matty is NOT a good driver and it's just better for everyone if he drives

Fictional!George moved into Fictional!Matty's house when they got back together, because Fictional!Matty was always the one hung up on where they lived, he just wanted to be where ever Fictional!Matty was

During the ~post bad times~ ~anger times~ where there was a lot of fighting and tension between Fictional!George and Fictional!Matty, Fictional!George was really trying to work through a lot of his own feelings and his own guilt regarding the whole ~situation~ he wasn't necessarily *mad* at Fictional!Matty nor did he *hate* him like Fictional!Matty thought, but rather he was frustrated with himself and the situation

Fictional!George has had the ring hidden in the back of his underwear drawer since 2013 - the two intertwining strands of black titanium where supposed to represent both him and Fictional!Matty, together forever. He chose black titanium and black diamonds because during that time period IRL Matty, so by default Fictional!Matty described their personal style as "black and expensive"

Fictional!George ends up putting a *lot* of pressure on Christmas moving forward, wanting to make the holidays special for Fictional!Matty after the mess that was this year, and also wants to make sure little Ava always has THE BEST Christmas and knows how much she is loved due to the trauma from his own relationship with his family. Fictional!Matty lets him do his thing but really he and Ava are just happy to spend time with their little family all together

Sorry for just going absolutely wild with the head canons there lol I got excited! Thank you so much for reading, and taking the time to send this ask! Also thank you so much for your patience, I am so sorry again that it has taken me until APRIL to finish a CHRISTMAS FIC. I hope you had a wonderful Tuesday and that you have the best week!

❤️Ally

[thatdeadaquarius]

GREETINGS! How are you doing? I've been practically gobbling up your posts (there very tasty)

Ok so hear me out- I've seen a couple posts like this but imagine-

The almighty all powerful wise creator isss

✨️A literal child✨️

Thanks for hearing me out! For you ->->❤️

Baby you taking on the world aw

DAMN SORRY FOR TAKING FOREVER!! i started fics before i answered my askbox :/

Aw i fucking love child reader stuff,

Lots of isekai animes/manhwa/manga do it and i eat that shit up everytime-

I also deeply appreciate when its not done creepily, like being turned 8 again, and having crushes on others who are... yknow, actually 8 yrs old or sm fucked up shit, like even if its 16 yr olds that doesnt make it any better, bc the protag will actually be like,, actually 20?!?!💀 the straights r wild man, i feel like it happens either way too, like its usually a male MC but thats just bc theyre more common tbh, like regardless of gender of protag 🥲

☆

Sun: Child God Reader (you/they/them)

Orbit: Short Headcanons

Stars: Mondstadt ppl bc i don't show them i love them enough

Comets & Meteors: Content Warnings: none known & Trigger Warnings: none known.

Please comment any I missed. /gen

Klee has recruited converted you to throwing bombs with her.

You are the only leash on that child too and the only thing standing between Jean and full head of gray hair. 💀

Kaeya doesn’t know whether he’s endlessly worried or endlessly amused that the most powerful god is currently a child

if Jean isnt freaking out over ur whereabouts, Diluc is instead, and worst case scenario, Noelle/Lisa/Albedo is in charge of you

and YES someone has to look out for you, bc ur ass will just start making a hot springs spot like ur in ur teapot or smth in dragonspine (Albedo was fascinated it stayed warm despite the weather so he let you make it/enjoy it before asking u to restore natural order lol)

(Albedo has definitely asked to study you and, unfortunately for Jean, asked u to demonstrate several powers u have)

You do work as a lucky charm for Bennett tho so he does babysit u sometimes

it mostly consists of Fischl, Benny, and Razor “adventuring” by trying to do smth like who can jump on the Anemo slimes and ride them around longest

(the answer is you btw, u managed to get a small fleet of them to bus you around, the teens were simultaneously terrified running around below u to catch you and also amazed)

Noelle is so happy making toddler you all the pancakes you can eat, Sucrose had to stop her from going overboard and not just listening completely to kids when it comes to food

She is now very concerned with making you a balanced diet, tho she will still make u an ungodly tall stack of pancakes every now and then <3

They kind of all equally provide for you, obv ur their god, and ur a literal cutie patootie child, they cant just leave you

(also u might like move a mountain or change the weather or smth if they don't watch you so most are a little paranoid of that too)

Lisa gets u all kinds of cute outfits, still stuff you'd like, but definitely snuck in some sumeru looking clothing lol

Fischl lends you all kinds of books to read, Bennett shows u all the cool views in the city and outside of it (when Jean lets him get away with taking u that far), and Razor…

Razor brings you to Andrius and the wolf pack for a wolf pack party and gives u all kinds of shiny trinkets he’d collected for you

Diluc/Jean/Noelle/Eula nearly had a heart attack when they found out

Amber lets you have all the piggyback rides you want lol

she even managed with her own crafting powers (and your probably editing the game code or smth) she somehow makes a reinforced glider with a small harness on the back for you to glide with her

(Venti has definitely helped for some fun flights by boosting the winds for you two)

SPEAKING OF BARBATOS

ur absolutely spoiled rotten by him (and Dvalin, and Andrius, and the wind sprites)

if this god had money he’d spend it on wine and you lol

takes u flying all the time, any time, would drop everything to go to Mondstadt wilds and use his archon form wings to take you wherever you wanna go

tries to bring u to Angel’s Share but Diluc nearly hits him on the head with a wine bottle and brings you back home after kicking Venti out and giving you grape juice (yes you get all you want, within a healthy amount)

anyway the most important part abt you being a god and child is that you can now fulfill your childhood dreams of riding a dragon whenever you want

(one way to quickly get Mondstadt citizens to trust Dvalin again was just constantly seeing him flying overhead, occasionally seeing a small child on his back also helped lol)

(neither you nor Venti tell Jean you ride Dvalin and keep it an active secret from her.)

☆

srry i took so long! i hope u liked my hot mess of writing (i think its even sloppier than usual bc of all the fic writing full sentences lately)

and if not, I'm sorrryyy 😭😭

I'm focusing on getting thru a haul of asks before getting around to posting that Eldritch AU Part 2 if anyone reads this :)

hope u guys are have a great weekend, thanks for all the birthday wishes!! :D

Safe Travels Anon,

💀♒

If you wanna join a taglist, DM me what for! "Pspspsss, please tag me for [All SAGAU posts, Only SAGAU Language AUs, diff fandom, etc.]!"

(If you ever wanna drop, just DM me! "No more taglists/[specifically this AU/fandom] please!")

♡the beloveds♡

@karmawonders / @0rah-s / @randomnatics / @glxssynarvi / @nexylaza / @genshin-impacts-me / @wholesomey-artist / @thedevioussmirk / @the-dumber-scaramouche / @chocogi / @fallen-starr / @areaderofbooks / @devilangel657 / @esthelily / @justinsomniachild / @nanithefuck / @questionotmystopit

@kiyomi-uchiha777

[lostgracestories]

Hiii, I really love your stuff !! The way you write the omen twins is just so cute and comforting, I really enjoy reading everything <3

I was wondering if you had any hcs about their omen nature ? (Maybe more animal behaviors or traits they could have)

Again, love your work !

AAA tysmmm you are so sweet 🥺🙏

I'm about to absolutely ramble so BEAR WITH ME ❤ also this is a little short because I'm doing this on the go, sorry!

wc: 316

tw: implied intimacy at the end of Mohg's section (lol I couldn't help it)

Just Animals

Morgott

HEAR ME OUT he 100% growls and purrs. Like, you didn't even know he could purr until you were laying with him and raking your fingers through his hair. He had accidentally let it slip and froze up in utter horror and embarrassment for letting it slip. Of course, you absolutely doted over this part of him and he could simply just not understand it.

So, you know how Morgott fights in such an animalistic way like when he lunges toward you in the fight? He definitely fights like a wild cat when the need for it arises. And I LOVE IT

LISTEN, he definitely makes a nest of his blankets in his bed/when he sleeps. And he curls up like a dog/cat with his tail resting next to him. ALSO HE KNEEDS THE BLANKETS LIKE A CAT (stfu you can't change my mind)

HE WAGS HIS TAIL (that's it, that's the headcanon. Jk) no but like, his tail conveys his emotions. If he's mad it will thump or vigorously swish around and if he's happy it will lightly sway back and forth

Mohg

Mohg for sure growls but I don't think he would purr like his brother. I think instead of purring he would probably just hum instead.

HE SCRATCHES THINGS so he has sharp claws/nails, right? He definitely scratches things to file them down like a cat and sometimes he'll like, mindlessly do it.

He loves having his horns scratched, it's like scratching a dog behind the ear. Sometimes if it feels good enough his leg with bounce or his foot will thump against the floor.

He for sure also loves getting his wings scratched too. Like, if you scratch them they flutter a bit and his feathers get all ruffled. Just don't venture too far down to the base of his wings... The moment his pupils dilate, it's over for you.

[the-moon-files]

Linked Universe / GN!Reader - Random Headcanons abt the Chain! :)

Part 1 / Part 2 (ur here!) / Part 3

Sun: Reader (you/they/them)

Orbit: Headcanons-ish

Stars: Hyrule, Time, Fierce Deity, Twilight, Warriors

Comets & Meteors: Content Warnings: light cussing, & Trigger Warnings: none known.

☆

Hyrule (The Legend of Zelda - OG game, Zelda II: Adventures of Link):

Lost easily, obviously, you know this

What you didnt know was that its very easy to get lost with him

Bc he's so excited/curious for new sights he doesnt give any fucks abt where he is, so it devolves into that "wait, I thought YOU were leading us there?? Then where tf are we??!!" very quickly

Does feel bad he stressed u out smtimes but he somehow manages to get into such wild shit that Hyrule's kinda preoccupied being confused/amazed/finding his way out, or any combo of these situations (once again, usually with you unfortunately)

Is the luckiest when it comes to getting lost or anything to do with "natural" things

Like he heard u rlly like this one fruit? Accidentally gets lost all day and panics all the Links + You until he shows up at midnight with a shirtful of them

("I found a few fruit trees/plants in the woods while wandering! I tried to grab a few for you and before I knew it, it was dark, sorry...")

Likes learning little skills from other people, like learning how to do makeup from Legend, or how to spot collections of rupees the Minish have left somewhere from Four, or how walk on any terrain from Wind (good at walking on a ship, on land, climbing etc)

More of a "sunset" hiker than a "sunrise" one

Likes to do your hair! Whether that be braiding, putting accessories (he handmade shhh) thruout it, or helping with hair maintenance, likes how strangely intimate but domestic it feels together with you (u return the favor ofc)

(All the other heroes are looking at you both like kicked puppies jfcccc🙄)

Time (Ocarina of Time, Majora's Mask):

Gets anxious if he's late to things, likes being fashionably early (or ungodly, when u let him get away with it)

Has absolutely been that meme from Parks and Recreation where he's like "Alright. I'm not mad, I just wanna know. Who broke it?"

(Abt the coffee pot for the camp)

Knowing full and well-

"I broke it. It burnt my coffee for the 3rd morning in a row, so I punched it. I predict 10 minutes from now they'll be at each other's throats with war paint on their faces and a moblin head on a stick. ...good. It was getting a little chummy around here."

MF LOVES GOSSIP (wouldn't admit this even at swordpoint)

Wars has absolutely been the person in the meme of:

Wars: "...why would you tell me this??"

Time: "Bc no one will ever believe you."

Wars: ...😦

Has a resting bitch face and knows it, actively cultivates it, scary dog privileges for you,

Type to take ur side in whatever situation ur in, even when Time has no idea whats going on, always, without question <3

The same height as First, (Twi's a close 2nd), and feels most secure when the 3 of you are at the front of the group, but First/Time are slightly in front of you

Like ur literally the person walking their 2 huge scary doobermans/mastiffs one leash in each hand basically 💀

(Once again, Link is deeply comforted by ur voice just over his shoulder/just hearing u even without seeing you)

Very subtly sarcastic, u dont even know he made a dig at you until 3-5 business days later

Likes ur sarcasm more than anyone else's in the group, or even his own lol

Fierce Deity (Majora's Mask):

Likes music, any music (amused at drunk karaoke)

Casually cradles ur arms or back whenever ur falling asleep/tripping/being clumsy near him

Very warm and smoothed calloused hands

Thinks abt what he's about to say so hard/long, that the conversation's moved on by like, 3 rounds/subject changes by the time he's actually ready to talk

Scolds ppl (in like a sentence) who neglect their needs, like sleeping/eating/hygiene

Finds peace in nature, if hes ever upset, u can bet he's already taking a walk by a stream

Likes teaching u/other Links little skills he has, its nice to feel appreciated/needed for something other than fighting or big moments

He falls in love with small moments, like the first time u made them all a dessert recipe from ur world, or repaired First's scarf (for the millioneth time) and bc everyone had gotten their clothes scratched up, everyone needed repairs so most Links were sewing smth lol

Enjoys watching ppl experience smth for the first time, or even himself exp smth for first time

Fierce smiled fully for the first time when you got into the mountain hot springs in Wild's Hyrule for the first time and were super excited

Also the type to hold ur hand while stepping in to make sure u dont fall, or just subtly boost a Link that was abt to fall from climbing smth

Like for being the tallest, he's surprisingly sneaky, the energy of the biggest cat in the house yet somehow also the quietest

Does that thing where someone takes ur hand and like massages ur fingers, palm, wrist and shakes them out kinda for you <3

Twilight (Twilight Princess):

Trips UP the stairs.

Cold start LMAO

ok ill be nice to him,, sike

Easy to bully?? U mean that kindly, he's just such a golden retriever sometimes u cant help urself (tho u make sure to reign it in and not take advantage of it so as not to genuninely hurt him)

Lol likes to "herd" his favorite people, like those dogs livestock farmers have u kno that they say end up herding their owners/their family lol

Like making subtle circles around the Chain, wrapping an arm around Hyrule and teasing him to quietly bring him back into the group before he gets lost,

Tugs on Time's armor to slow him down, mf may be in armor head to toe but he'll outpace all of u 💀

Likes to put his hand on ur lower back to guide u back into the group from whatever scenic thing u got distracted by

(so sue you, ur literally in The Legend of Zelda's Hyrule, surrounded by pretty blondes, why tf wouldnt you be distracted all the time??)

The only time he doesnt herd actively is in Ordon, just subconciously lol <3

Terrible sleep schedule, but sleeps like the dead when he does, has collapsed with a limb on top of you and u couldnt escape

Hard time waking up in the morning despite being country boy, who usually have to do chores first thing in morning on a farm

hates/envious of Wild (up at 5am even on days off?? Foul.)

Runs warm, but complains abt a slight breeze?

Would sleep with no covers if it werent for morning dew

Wishes cats liked him more (its the wolf smell)

Twi has the constant energy of a tall person carefully maneuvering around cluttered/low doorways while someone a head shorter runs by him and bounces off of him

U get onto/scold the Links and he's immediately the first to just sit on the ground, or put down whatever he's holding no matter what he's doing LMAO 😭😭

Keeps his eyes on u too the whole time lol

Warriors (Hyrule Warriors):

Cries over romance novels/dramas

A virgo in all stereotypes of the word tbh

Invented the red-string conspiracy theory board before the red-string conspiracy board existed in Hyrule

Also likes to take care of your hair! (What?? He and 'Rulie don't fight over ur hair, that'd be childish, he's not a foolish boy- Hyrule, hand over the brush.👹)

Remembers the little things abt u type of person, like ur favorite drink, ur favorite stories like tv shows/books even if theyre from ur world, ur favorite clothing pieces like shorts vs. pants, etc.

The only Link who can single handedly claim he could take your closet and dress you in something you'd actually wear.

Honestly once he got the hang of it, would get better at dressing you, than you

(Another domestic thing he adores, picking outfits for u/finding that perfect piece of clothing you've been needing lately)

Born to night-owl, forced to morning-bird 😔

Wars wakes up stiff sometimes bc soldier training is sleeping on ur back, hands to ur sides, laying straight in ur bed, so as to fit into bunks/bedrolls close together

It got better as he was promoted to Captain, so he could have his own quarters but its still a hard habit to shake

One of the few Links who works up the courage to genuinely pitfully ask if you'd mind massaging his shoulders again? He slept badly last night, please?? 🥺👉👈

(Ur so weak for pathetic hurting pretty blonde twinks lol)

The most lowkey abt taking care of Chain, but u make sure to take care of him as a gift back, and you've definitely caught him tearing up abt it 💖

☆

Debated writing smth else first but figured this was easy and short and i started it first so youll have to wait like one more post before more Masc Reader stuff guys 😔

Dw its coming, i havent abandoned u my homies out there 🫂

Let me know what u think in the comments of my slight characterizations here!

Im struggling to conceptualize their personalities so thats acc part of why i started to write smaller stuff like this first! :)

Peace out,

🌙

[reiwanwan]

How peaky men fart ‼️

So….today we will be discussing the different ways that I personally think these peaky men fart, maybe I will make this a series like “Unhinged peaky blinder headcanons” And if you have your own unhinged headcanons that you want do feel free to ask! my request are very much open

Tommy 🤍

- most people are convinced this man doesn’t fart, but it’s a natural human function so of course even tommy shelby needs to let one out

- Dead serious expression and completely unfazed

- His farts have no sound and they dont even stink so no one even knows if he farted

- He also has pretty privilege and he knows that so he uses it to his full advantage

- Because of that he has the ability to fart loudly and no one would even bother to think it was him because pretty people dont fart

- In the scenario where if he let one out silently and it did stink he would probably just light a cigarette afterwards to cover up the smell

Arthur 🧡

- Loud and unapologetic

- Disrespectful.

- Absolutely no consideration for the people around him

- He would let it rip and laugh and say that it was the “sound of victory”

- He farts the loudest and is very proud of the volume of it

- He wont fart around ladies though

-Buuut if you were a guy, I’m sorry but you are going to be his victim

-He is kind enough though to let you know if he’s going to fart

John 🩵

- Now this one does NOT let you know when he is going to fart

- Always blames it on someone else

- Has the WETTEST farts and you’re always having to ask him to check his boxers because you are so sure he shit himself

- He does the classic “pull my finger” joke with his kids

- If you were laying down next to this man i’m sorry but you are getting dutch ovened and you will suffocate

- After he lets you out he apologises and says “must be the cabbages you made earlier”

Alfie 🤎

- Another loud farter here, second to arthur

- Also lets you know when he’s going to fart

- You guys could be walking together and he will stop you, “Hold on treacle…” and then proceed to rip ass.

- Will continue holding your hand as he farts

-If you seem embarrassed he will turn it into a whole monologue when he’s done and when you guys continue walking

- Gives long-winded explanations about how it is “A normal human bodily function”

- “you see love…holding it in wouldn’t be healthy because you see right…it’s a sign of a proper, working digestive system, its how god meant it to be”

Michael 💙

- Oh boy please don’t ever call him out he will get defensive and his ego will be CRUSHED

- Really feels like farting is emasculating and will insist on holding it in till he gets home to let it out

- Polly can always tell when he needs to fart for some reason and will tell her stubborn son that he is allowed to fart

- But in the case where he desperately needs to fart, he will excuse himself and go outside

- And boy does he let that one go wild because he’s pretty sure that fart cured all his stomach problems

- His farts doesn’t smell too idk why I just feel like he wouldn’t have stinky farts

Finn 💛

- Everyone pushes the blame onto him if they fart

- Especially arthur

-John would blame it on finn if he was sitting next to girl that he fancied. “Ughhh finn you nasty bastard…letting one out next to a lass?”

-Tommy would fart and then blame it on finn if someone smelt his own silent fart and everyone around will he quick to believe him

-Poor Finn

-If he farts he will be very embarrassed

-but understands its normal so he would try not to make a big deal out of it and man it out lol

-If people do start laughing at him though, he will join and laugh along just to save face even if it did actually hurt his feelings just a wee bit

That is all lovely human beings please do let me know what you guys think of this. The reason for writing this purely because I was super bored and my imagination goes wild and also because I thought that it would be completely hilarious lmao xx

[johnslittlespoon]

i have been dealing with the brainrot of twink college student john and biker gale but then the other half of the post jumped me in a dark alley and all i can think about is john's friend who is used to their friends having crushes on their dad but it's whatever. weird, but whatever, as long as they don't get vocal about it they can just use it as something to tease them about at the worse. john looking up at gale with big doe eyes isn't the first time they've seen a friend do that, they've seen other people who are considered more age appropriate do worse when faced with the gale cleven effect. only it never occurs to them gale feels like he can't breathe right and like is organs are too big for chest whenever he looks at john and feels like he's something too soft than he should allow himself to be but around john it doesn't feel bad, maybe it's a good thing he can unapologetically be soft for someone.

cue the ladies who thought they might be able to win over the quiet, intimating and rugged dilf biker seeing that his heart was stolen by none other than john clarence egan, the son of mr and mrs egan who everyone is sure are moments away from a heart attack.

the au post | GOD same it has notttt left my mind. and you GET ITTT you captured the vibe i was picturing for that version perfectly ugh.

literally 1k+ words of brainrot below the cut... deeply sorry. any excuse to talk about them and i'm spinning in my chair apparently LOL <3

like john takes one look at gale and knows he's not the only one who swoons over him, spends an ungodly amount of time pining from day one. but any fantasies are only fantasies, because he knows (thinks he knows) he doesn't stand a chance, both for the fact that he's his son's friend, and that gale probably thinks he's too immature, and that he's, y'know, not a girl.

but gale is gone too from their first meeting, he's just a lot better at hiding it (and finds it so endearing how bad john is at hiding it despite how well john thinks he's doing lol.) once he and john start tentatively feeling things out, and even before that really, the way he feels when he looks at the doe–eyed boy scares him– a vulnerable softness and urge to protect that he's been just fine with not feeling.

of course there's the conflict when he tries to shove down these feelings at first, because he knows how mad his son (who i headcanon as ken because he and leaving!john would be precious dorky besties) would be if he were to ever indulge in them, regardless of how much john wants it. and there's the guilt of feeling like john would be happier with someone his age, but john is the most persistent, stubborn person he's ever met, and the way he folds so quickly for him is terrifying.

and yet he falls for the attentive softhearted absolute puppy dog of a boy that john is, finds himself as fond of his moments of angsty bite and bristle as he is when he's docile at his side, melting under gale's gaze. there's no proper confirmation ever made to others about their status, no reason to need one, because they're attached at the hip and people learn quickly not to so much as look at john the wrong way, because gale's never far behind him.

and the angsttt of john's parent's disapproval– yeah, he's an adult and he's independent and is off doing college and all, but his parents aren't chill with "that gay shit" and he gets the classic "so long as you're living under our roof, you're not to see that man" talk, and what's an angsty rebellious lovesick john to do but get better at sneaking out of his window and jogging down the street to meet gale at his motorcycle so his parents don't hear it pull up?

i'm sure eventually it would come to a head because they'd find out he's been going behind their back when they catch him sneaking back inside late one night, and he's given the good old "stop seeing him or pack your bags" ultimatum. it takes gale a wild amount of self control to not storm into the house and chew out john's parents when he picks up the phone to a sniffling terrified john at two in the morning less than an hour after he'd dropped him off down the street.

it takes even more self control when he sees the angry red of a handprint on john's cheek when he pulls up and finds him sat on the curb with a hastily stuffed backpack, and his heart shatters when john starts apologizing, as if he'd ever be upset with him. but then, cue domesticity (and a different kind of sneaking around) as john temporarily moves in with him and ken. all ken is told is that john's parents kicked him out and he knows how badly they treat him so he doesn't ask many questions, so shitty circumstances aside, he's over the moon at getting to have his best friend stay with him.

john promises to find someplace to rent a room in as soon as he can because he feels awful for intruding, but gale finds that he really likes having john around, insists he stays with the two of them at least till he's done with his semester so he doesn't have to worry about paying rent. lots of nuance to sort out there but you get the gist. <3

also. john wearing gale's leather jacket sighhh. finding any excuse he can to steal it, face going all pink when gale drapes it over his shoulders when they're out on dates, beaming when gale lets him wear it home with the promise that he'll return it the next day, falling asleep with his face pressed to it, drowning in the smell of gale's aftershave and cigarettes and diesel.

+ slight tangent but the things that could come about from the sneaking around?? minor spoilers for anyone who hasn't seen callum's show 'leaving' that his character in this au is loosely based off of, but there's a scene where he and his milf not–gf are fooling around in his room and his parents get home early.

i have this scene in my head where john thinks he's meant to have the house to himself for the night, invites gale over, they end up in the shower and they hear the front door slam mid–fuck. there's a moment of panic, both of them freezing, john whispers that "dad's probably forgot his wallet or something," assumes gale will stay unmoving until they hear the door slam again.

only gale suddenly rolls his hips forward, and john chokes on a moan, gale's hand coming up to quickly cover his mouth, his other hand squeezing john's hip as he kisses his shoulder and murmurs "you can be quiet, can't you, sweetheart?"

anyway. yeah, this au has me in a chokehold so hard still, i'm 100% still planning on writing it post–dog fic <3 i do love this whole cliche best friend's dad route of this au, but i'm also not sure i feel like tackling the conflict of john having his friend find out about the two of them, and i feel like that would be kinda inevitable to have to write about if i took that route for the fic lol </3 so i think that version of the au will be limited to brainrot like this and when i write the actual fic it'll just be the college student x bikerider vibe, but honestly there's so much overlap with the two concepts anyway that it won't make too much of a difference!

thx for unintentionally encouraging my yapping i love this version of these two so much and i am apologizing in advance for the person i will become when i see the bikeriders in theatres xoxo

[octoagentmiles]

Headcanons about Paani and Natquik's relationship and how they met? 👀

uh well actually ik it's kinda wild n out there but I headcanon they met like this:

/s /lh fhdhdjdbsk sorry I'm not 100% sure what you want from me here?? 😅

but!! as for their relationship—at the end of that ep Paani says he's going to stay with Natquik for a little while, so that they can continue to study the flowing water that they found together, but we never actually get to see this ourselves. so!! it's extremely possible that Paani and Natquik are buddy-buddy now, but we just haven't gotten to see them interact since their friendship started!!

so 👀. some hcs 🤲 ↓

474637942749 years ago I made a post talking about how while yes, Paani is obviously a lot like Kwazii, he also has just as much in common with Barnacles. it's just more subtle.

I think that during their time together, Natquik probably would've picked up on that. Natquik's been alone for forever, and has been shown struggling when he's forced to share private space with others—but I think once he started to notice Paani's similarities to Barnacles, he became an infinitely more tolerable roommate.

... however.

one of Natquik's biggest grievances with Red (*the red fox) was how he ruined what would've been his "peaceful and quiet" vacation.

and. um.

... that's not exactly Paani's specialty.

so they likely had to get used to each other's *style* the hard way at first.

Paani's not the type to intentionally start conflict, or even get outwardly annoyed with others (from what we've seen so far anyway). he's very easygoing, and even if it confuses him, I can see him accepting the way Natquik works pretty quickly.

but he does have a habit of doing things without asking first, or considering how his actions may indirectly affect others before doing them, in the name of The Greater Good™ (such as stealing the GUP-H so he could bring water to the elephants). the Octonauts can forgive him easily, because he *does* usually end up saving the day,

but. uh.

Natquik's not as chill (ironically) with that.

so!! it's sorta less of them having to get used to each other, and more Natquik having to get used to Paani lol

Paani absolutely ended up meeting Natquik's penguin fam while he was staying with him, and they immediately loved him (as all birds he meets do), which GREATLY helped Natquik warm up to him.

maybe they also told Paani about how Natquik's just having a hard time, 'cause of how long he spent alone. and Paani, who was alone for an indefinite length of time himself, until he was found by the Octonauts... decides to open up to Natquik.

they talk for a bit.

then Boom! Friendship™ 🌠🌈 [INSERT CONFETTI CANONS 🎉🥳] !!

okay there was probably more to it than that, but we don't know how LONG they were roomies for—could've been only a few days, or a month, max, knowing Paani's dislike of staying put for too long lmao.

either way, I'd love to see them meet again, after having gotten to know each other. I think they'd make a really cool dynamic, if they were to go out on a real adventure or mission together. they MET in that episode, but they didn't really interact much—Paani was on his own, and Natquik was with Dashi in the Octoray.

and Natquik desperately needs more screentime anyway 👁️👁️

[oliver-crow]

hii i really liked your tags on the OM fishie boys, can you talk more about them? or maybe which aquatic animal you would personally headcanon each? no pressure =w=bb <3

Hi thank you ! I’m just a ocean nerd who looks too deep on mermaid designs

So for these guys I’m going to give them a shark and a different sea creature , mainly because I love sharks so much know more about them but also I have ideas for other creatures.

Obey me cast as sea creatures!

Lucifer:

• so for a shark I think he would be best as a bull shark

•bill sharks are territorial and can kill (even if accidentally)

•other animal wise he would be a vampire squid

•mainly for aesthetics but also since vampire squids are seen as not actually squids and of their own genus . Like how Lucifer was a demon but not anymore and is something different

•idk it’s hard to write for him T-T

Mammon:

• I know what you all are thinking for shark mams, ‘he’s obviously going to be a mako’

• NO. mammon is a lemon shark through and through .

• why? Well lemon sharks sometimes form bonds with certain divers and get incredibly possessive and greedy for the divers attention to the point they will actively drive away other sharks .

• who else is possessive and greedy but also sweeter than most other shark demons well mammon of course

• he could also be a bluefin tuna cuz really fast but idk

Leviathan:

my bias will show here lmao

• Levi is absolutely a thresher shark I mean he has the same energy as one !

• thresher sharks attack schools of fish ..schools of normies maybe?

• noooo it’s not just because thresher sharks are my fav and Levi is also my fav whattttt/s

•as for marine creatures Levi is an octopus

•they hide away and can change colors when scared

•Levi hides away in his room and changes colors when embarrassed!/hj

Satan:

• Satan gives off big oceanic white tip shark vibes

•Both are incredibly territorial and can act aggressive.

•for marine animal I’m just kinda throwing stuff at a wall here and hoping it sticks

• he’s a dolphin . I’m debating making him an orca but I have a specific sleepy demon I have that idea for.

•dolphins can be aggressive but sadistic when hunting things

•dolphins are also incredibly smart .

Asmodeus:

• ok to be honest I do not know what shark to throw at this guy so this will be vague

•he gets a leopard shark since they are considered one of the prettiest shark species

•and of course for sea creature he is a jellyfish , specially a sea nettle jellyfish!

•sea nettles may not be deadly but they can cause painful stings while also being incredibly pretty

Beelzebub:

•there’s no doubt in my mind that this guy is a tiger shark!

•tiger sharks are big strong and beautiful but they will eat literally anything

•like. Anything. Some have been found with license plates in their stomachs

•as for another creature he’s like a giant grouper

•they also eat anything they can fit in their mouths but also get huge .

Belphagor:

• so shark wise he is a pacific sleeper shark

•they are supposedly known for their sluggish and dozy nature

•for a sea creature he is absolutely an orca !

•orcas are intelligent and methodical.

•they also have never hurt a human in the wild and only in captivity

•belphie was in captivity and then hurt a human so he’s an orca to me.

Holy crap I’m sorry this took so long I’ve been busy and I also wanted to make this as perfect as I could lol .

Hope it’s okay , I might make this an au , maybe . If y’all want that lmk lol

[fluidthoughts]

König general/random headcanons

This is my first time literally ever doing this, so if it sucks I'm really sorry. This also took me freaking forever to put together cause my brains a mess, and even now I'm feeling like it isn't finished, even though it'd already SO LONG IM SORRY LOL. But it'll do for now. I'm also thinking about making a separate post for relationship and NSFW headcanons soon. I just uh. Haven't begun to really jot those thoughts down yet, eheh.

- despite his incredibly large size, if he doesn't want to be seen or noticed, he won't be. A good part of it due to his anxiety that brings a strong desire to avoid being the center of attention. Soft silent footsteps, slinking himself right into the most unnoticed parts of a place, encompassed in the shadows until by some chance, you catch a glimmer of those intense, unwavering, piercing eyes.

- those damn eyes, always scanning, observing, calculating. Staring right through your very soul. It'd be absolutely frightening if it weren't for his inability to not fidget slightly as he stared.

- not a man of many words either. Mostly made up of silent nods and gestures. Chit chat doesn't come easily to someone like him, so when he does speak, he speaks honest and direct. At times taken by others as too blunt or abrasive, contrary to his intentions.

- and of course once he's set loose on the battlefield, that quiet unnerving focus he exudes changes into something entirely different. Something *terrifying*. The embodiment of primal power, pure adrenaline, and even what may be a grotesque sense of humor and pleasure as he tears his way through the enemy

- part of it could be due to this sense of despair in his fellow man, maybe even humankind he feels. He knows too well of the evils that exist in this world, (and maybe the next he fears, for he is just as washed in blood)

- he admires his team a lot though, for their lack of judgement with him, and how they all work together so well, makes him appreciate their dynamics such as he appreciates pack animals in the wild.

- he deeply adores and respects nature and animals. And being the giant muscled athlete he is, lots of outdoor activities are very much to his liking. Hiking, rafting, climbing, etc. When in nature, he feels envy for the innocence and beauty he sees around him. As well as feeling a sense of relatability to the primal instincts and violence and death.

- because of the bullying he endured throughout his life, and because of his size, he would get into fights. A lot. To this day, it still happens actually. Usually ending up in bar fights. As much as he tries to keep himself from it, the habit is there, and he's never one to let rowdy douches in the bars get away with their nasty jabs and comments. He's also been known to get into some of these fights defending someone else. Can't stand to see bullying happen in front of him. But there's also this part of him that thinks he still goes out and gets into these fights because maybe deep down he enjoys it.

- can play the mouth harp. No I will not elaborate. Other than his deep love for music and desire to play instruments, but he always had a hard time being able to focus his hands. Often thought to himself his hands were only good for killing. Turns out he had a knack for the mouth harp though.

- I wouldn't go as far to say he's a religious or overly spiritual man, but he's very enthralled by things like old folklore, tales and stories of things in the wilderness that are best left unknown to man. Hes definitely experienced some things himself that he cant quite explain. One could say it's the cause of his respect and carefulness for the wild parts of the world around him. One could also say its just superstition. He's also very into learning about and hearing stories about such legends of other places, the countries his teammates are from, locals when he's traveling in an unfamiliar place, etc.

- if he is comfortable enough, like he is with his team, he's witty and snarky as fuck. He loves to banter and tell dry jokes and just being a little menace overall. Especially if he's enjoying some drinks and feeling loosened up.

- he has a soft side, and deep down is even a hopeless romantic, but even in his own mind, he's more monster than man. His gentleness is buried deep, except for his interactions with animals. He has always wanted a pet of his own, but knows with his way of life, it wouldn't be for the best. And something like a relationship, he doesn't even get any hopes up for.

- is also a bit of a pyromaniac.

- also a very prideful man. Which makes him competitive, and all the more reluctant to really open himself up. He hates feeling like anyone might be pitying him, and is forever in a mindset of proving himself, pushing himself, and becoming more and more stoic. The type to be most adamant about refusing help from someone.

- he's got an insanely quick wit, but also just incredibly smart and able to learn and pick up on things almost immediately. He's especially handy with things that are of the "take apart and put back together" variety. Hence why he was always fond of firearms.

- he knows women notice him, he notices them too. He knows he's attractive as well. But ever since a cruel joke played on him in his teen years, he finds it all the more difficult to trust women in any sort of romantic or intimate way. "Brawls with other men at least bring total honesty with them" he thinks. And all the better to keep him less distracted from work anyways, right?

- Roze basically forced him (and the whole squad) to learn how to braid to help her and Calisto before missions. König's actually pretty good at it too for it being a hand based task.

[riddle-me-ri]

Well, your last NSFW alphabet gave me the idea that I will not give up NSFW alphabet with BTAS Scarecrow ^^ Keep it up, you write well

a/n: asdfgh thank you so much! And another NSFW alphabet in the books, like I said with HQTAS Scarecrow, I was working on this one as well and it’s finally done lol. I will say while these seem simple to do, it’s actually fairly time consuming and hard to come up with answers sometimes, so sorry if it seems like I repeated anything lol may need to take a break from these lol

Content Warning: minor sexual content including; mention of various kinks (bdsm/mirrors), jacking off, sex positions, and genitals.

BTAS Scarecrow - NSFW Alphabet

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

Jonathan is exhausted. His pale skin is flushed red. Jon’s heart is still pounding but he’s in absolute bliss. He’s also very…sentimental as he realized how lucky he is to have a partner.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

Jonathan has never exactly been a fan of his body. He never quite cared for his physique as he does his brain…he supposes if had to chose one it would likely be his diligent and ambidextrous hands. 

For his partner, his favorite body part may also be their hands. Just even the slightest touch from them seems to put his body at ease. 

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

Jonathan is rather indifferent to it, especially his own. Whenever he found himself giving in to touching himself he found it to be a nuisance to clean when he was finished. However, with a partner he has learned to appreciate it more, especially how it falls and covers their partner’s face or fills them up to where some spills out. 

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

While Jonathan won't admit it and he hopes his partner will never find out…but he has definitely undressed his partner or who he is interested in with his eyes. As well as fantasized with what his eyes have imagined. 

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

Jonathan is aware of sex and what it entails. However, knowing and doing are two entirely different things. He isn’t very experienced at all, he has a notion of what to do…but doesn’t have the experience or confidence to fully commit. 

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

Jon is fairly vanilla at first and is pretty comfortable with missionary for the most part but he can be open to cowgirl/cowboy especially if his partner is in a particular mood to dominate him.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

He is a fairly serious person in general. Not wanting to make a fool of himself and I feel the same would go for the bedroom. However, if he is comfortable with a partner, you can find him teasing or chuckling if things get awkward. 

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

Extremely well-groomed, with a decent bush. He has a small hint of a happy trail just above his belly button and pubic hair is a slightly darker auburn color.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

Jonathan is very intimate. It goes hand in hand with his seriousness for the situation at hand. Every sexual encounter with his partner, planned or not, is a testament to his love for them which means adoring them from the beginning, middle, and end.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

Much like with his experiments with others fears, whenever Jonathan jacks off he lets his imagination run wild. He has masturbated in his youth, but more or less as a means to be rid of his hard on. When he has a partner, he often resorts to this when he’s away from them in Arkham and often imagines them while doing it. 

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

Praise, some bdsm, especially with ropes/restraints, (I dunno why, but I pin several Scarecrows being into tying up their partner or vice versa), and mirrors (he enjoys observing his partner moreso than anything, almost like a test subject in a way) 

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

Jon is more comfortable to do the deed in the confines of either his, his partner’s, or the shared home of him and his partner. He knows there’s a slim chance of being caught or interrupted and he gets to take his time. 

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

Nothing motivates him more than his partner praising him. Telling him how smart he is, how powerful he has and can be with his fear gas…how it turns them on to be so close to such an influential figure. The way they touch him, caress him, squeeze his shoulders, arms, and lower appendages. It leaves him an absolute yearning mess every time. 

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Jonathan is definitely one of the Scarecrows that isn’t into the idea of having his partner under the influence of fear toxin. The idea of hearing his partner screaming and crying in fear…makes Jonathan shudder in discomfort. Even if you were to ask for it as a means of experimenting–it’s a hard no for him. 

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

At first, Jonathan isn’t all that skilled in giving, much like how he isn’t exactly skilled in sex in general. However, with enough guidance and patience from his partner, he gets to learn what renders his partner speechless. He does prefer recieving moreso though, he’s not used to having so much attention on him and he relishes in it. 

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

Jonathan usually opts for a more slow and sensual pace, he feels it’s less chaotic and doesn’t entirely enjoy the idea of rushing something so intimate and pleasurable.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

Not very often, Jon doesn’t want to make mistakes and he wants to take his time and enjoy this intimate moment with his partner. He does understand the…neccessity of relief however, and if his partner manages to talk him into it, he can be up for it. 

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

Jon is content with a rather vanilla sex life, occassionally drabbling in some kinks like bondage or mirrors, but he isn’t crazy about taking too many risks. Risks leaves room for error and mistakes to be made. He will need a lot of reassurance and motivation from his partner that come what may, it won’t change the dynamic or turn them off from him. 

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

Jonathan could go for a couple rounds, with three likely being the max just do to not being quite used to the physical toll. It will take some time to build his stamina, but with experience and practice he can last a couple of hours.   

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

Jonathan doesn’t own any toys nor use them. If he does, it’s likely through his partner, and nine times out of ten his partner uses those toys on Jonathan. 

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

While Jonathan tries to tease, his partner is likely the one that’s the most unfair. He tries to hold himself together and not give into his partner’s cruel teasings, but he isn’t always successful. 

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

Jonathan isn’t very loud at all. The few sounds he does make are soft and shaky, like his whimpers or deep pants. 

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

Jonathan has had a crush and fantasized about another faculty member during his time at Gotham University. He’s under the impression that the member didn’t know and once he took on the Scarecrow alias the feelings dissipated. 

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

Given his tall and lanky stature, I’d imagine the same would go for his cock. It may not be the thickest or girthest, but it is long and has prominent veins alongside it.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

Fairly normal, unless he’s been away at Arkham for a considerably long time. He gets more irritable, frustrated, and forlorn. Absence absolutely makes the heart grow fonder, and makes him yearn for his partner more and more every day they’re apart. Whenever he finally does manage to escape it’s like a pot boiling over and he no longer just wants his partner it’s a need.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

Jonathan dozes off rather quickly, albeit he doesn’t always mean to. He tries to stay conscious long enough to be present for his partner if needed, but if it’s been a while or a particularly intense session, he’s likely to fall asleep quickly.

[tikvin]

For the other durges you showed a while ago, which ones accepted/denied Baal? If they denied him do they have specific reasons for why?

Well this will be long, lol. I have full descriptions of my durges I plan to post separately for each, but I'll try to cut a lot to just accommodate to the question.

Some of them aren't that close to this matter, plus I'm waiting for evil epilogue to be added, I also have a bit of a soft spot for resisting durges because of that one camp scene in act 2, so most of them are resisting durges, just differ by smaller details like what quests they do/dont and who of PCs and NPCs dies and they kill during travels.

So, sorry for my boring durges :D

Eshra - I think you can already guess.

Vice is close to accepting Bhaal, because it likes Minthara a lot (even though it didn't initially sided with her) and she's is a bad influence. It already got the slayer form, also the first to consume the astral tadpole so far. How it will all end? Who knows, Vice loves Minthara and it's a novel concept for it, hence the drow is able to sway it's opinions, but Vice also likes to have a control over it's own body. So Vice is on precipice

Evann is THE evil Bhaalspawn™ 100%. With this one, I will tell for sure, they're a cruel evil bitch-bastard, but probably doesn't fully realize that their actions are considered cruel. For them it's pure curiosity and pursuit of fun, they are not concerned when they first have the urges. Probably remembers more than other Durges. Probably had relationships with Gortash.

Jericho is the one who was terrified and disgusted from the very start. I think it was easier for her to resist, because she is a wild magic sorcerer (who I headcanon to be masterful before amnesia) and she had to be careful from the very beginning. She's skittish, in constant internal panic, a coward when it comes to perspective of getting back her memories. She was the one who tried to fix everyone else's problems just to not face her own. She had a lot of growth during the travels and now researches bhaalspawn to prevent anything happening.

With Cadere (who will later rename themselve as Ithildin) is absolutely out of question, they will not be accepting Bhaal, simply because... Karlach. You see, that's a Karlach kisser in front of you, and with all anguish that this whole shit caused to her they just cannot allow that to happen. Cadere was indifferent at the start, which caused quite a few deaths, but Karach energy just rubbed on them and they did the ol switcheroo

Thana is all about freedom. Bhaal is out of question. Freedom for herself, freedom for everyone else, freedom!!! She probably planned to defy Bhaal somehow even before the tadpole.

Thalissa - No. No Bhaal, we're having fun kicking devils' asses in hell. Has hots for both Wyll and Karlach, and their righteous do-gooder demeanor rubs on her. Not completely tho, she's quite bloodthirsty on her own, which is why she's most likely going with them to hell to justly kill shit without consequences. At least if Karlach won't sacrifice herself for Orpheus. I planned more than one play through with her, so it's undecided, maybe she will have one game where she's evil, who knows

Mortis is very power hungry, even though their overall demeanor is quite chill. They might not go completely towards Bhaal but they're sure are tempted to kill Isobel...

Jago - was a simple person, but not dumb. No Bhaal. Much like Thana, he wanted freedom, and he teared and ripped and clawed for it. He wasn't very caring for others, but he got what he wanted, without hurting too much people.

[delta-lethonomia]

Tried to narrow it to a few and was not successful: 8, 10, 13, 16, 17

8. see last post!

9. worst part of fanon

Hmm. This is actually pretty difficult, I feel like I'm only exposed to such a curated selection of fanon these days I completely miss all the wild takes. I will say that I don't think Astarion would necessarily do that much embroidery/sewing after the events of the game. I got the impression that a lot of it was because he needed to look attractive and put together, lacked the resources to acquire new things, and embroidering dumb things on his underwear was the only amount of bodily autonomy he could flex. He can't exactly dye his hair, cut it, or steal any jewelry without it getting stolen by the other spawn: he literally only has the clothes on his back, and they need to be kept in good condition if he wants any degree of success enticing higher class/presumably less violent and more attractive people back to Cazador.

If anything, I think post-bg3 he'd splurge and get himself nice things, holding onto fraying clothing for far too long but not repairing it. He can buy things now - but the urge to hoard it would still exist, while patching it might strike too close to old habits. He'd pick up the thread and think of something, but wouldn't be able to bring himself to embroider anything for himself. A partner though, yes, but not himself.

There's no need for a stamp across his ass if no one's going to see it anymore.

13. worst blorbofication

the bestest babygirl Astarion. Seriously. What the fuck. We've got Snape levels of delusion about this bitch. He's been "draco in leather pants'd" enough that it's flipped around entirely, because Astarion does actually wear leather pants, so instead he's heteronormative fantasy #142 where he's loving husband material, ready to have adorable dhampir babies and sweetly make love under the blankets of their 3-bedroom house with white picket fence while assuring tav/durge that's 100% ready to have missionary sex again with deep eye contact where maybe one of them gets to come, because it's fine, we don't need sex for emotional intimacy. ????

Astarion absolutely can be kind in a bitchy, understated way, but every time I see a thing where he's too nice I want to write a scene where he does something horrible or picks a fight. Let👏 him 👏 murder 👏

16. you can't understand why so many people like this thing (characterization, trope, headcanon, etc)

ok already answered BUT HAVE ANOTHER! (Actually have 2!) I don't like "Sweet, supportive Astarion" characterizations. I think no matter the trauma, his is always going to be worse, and even if he doesn't say it he's definitely thinking it. I don't think he'd be actively sweet, more… deliberately not being an asshole, at best. Crying about your mum dying? He'll let you cry on his shoulder, give a sentence of comfort, then change the conversation. Very stiff upper lip - "Must be talk about this?"

Wait ok I just thought of the actual controversial take. I don't get the obsession with putting Astarion in dresses. He's beautiful, yes, but there are a lot of handsome men in fiction, but Astarion especially get put into dresses a lot. Is it because of the wavemother robes??? Did that unlock something in people??? Is it because he comes across as gay sometimes, so therefor let's put him in women's clothing, because crossdressing stereotypes? Putting any man in a dress is subversive, I get that, I just don't get what about Astarion makes people so feral for it. Skimpy clothing, yes, but the heels and dresses. why.

It makes me think of nail polish on men these days. I get the impression it's a certain flavor of liberal man who wears nail polish as a subversive act, trying to show that feminine things aren't lesser, that they're not ashamed of wearing them, but Astarion's absolutely a rather conservative character politically. Like… babygirl's voting Tory/Republican, if he's voting at all. Sorry.

Maybe I'm thinking too deeply about this lol. But for real - he's a very masculine-coded character. He cries once, and that's an overwhelming cathartic release after centuries of pain. He's assertive in sex scenes. Even though he sounds like he's close to tears sometimes, he pushes past emotional things very quickly, is driven by a need for freedom, to provide for the player and be powerful enough for the both of them, to keep them safe, has a drive for power that's frightening, and will throw down if it comes down to it. He threatens you if you tell him no about sharing the tadpoles, even after sleeping together. His shoulders are much broader than you think. He's very, very masculine, both in body and values, he just also happens to be a flirt and has had trauma and submission beaten into him. In elf terms, he's the chaddest chad to ever chad.

He would also fold one leg over the other at the knee while sitting on a stool that gives stereotypical "gay" vibes, but I can also see him manspreading all over the place. But I just don't see fanart of Astarion manspreading with a prominent bulge the same way I see dress fanart everywhere. I feel like I just don't get the appeal enough to unpick this!

17. there should be more of this type of fic/art

Crushing Ascended Astarion into the dirt. I'm so, so glad Larian added that option to take control of him after becoming the Absolute - he doesn't see it coming at all, and it's so good. I just want to see AA as far away from power as possible, struggling with himself, and maybe regretting the Ascension and all that he lost. I don't think AA is completely hopeless - he's still Astarion, just dumber, more arrogant, more scared and out of touch with himself, with all those emotional walls snapped back into place all the harder - but that just makes me want to crack him like an egg.

Oh, or fics/art where Tav/Durge left him instead of becoming his spawn. He lets them leave, but I don't think he ever gets over it, and it's his last little shred of goodness/arrogance/self-pity that prevents him from taking them back forcefully. Pieces Still Stuck in Your Teeth by howlsmovinglibrary is obviously the best example of this and can't be topped, but I want more cakes!!! Not of "darkly seductive vampire lord Astarion seducing an old flame back to his side" cake, but of "disaster AA embarrasses himself by becoming more pathetic over an obsession he just can't shake." The higher they rise, the harder they fall.

He just wants to be loved unquestionably despite thinking of himself as a proven monster and therefore unlovable

[ryuichirou]

Azul×Idia headcanons... hand em over, I wanna hear them all, every single one

(You're artsyle is so scrumptious it's not even funny❤❤❤❤❤❤)

Dear Anon! Sorry for the late reply. I am very happy you like my artstyle, and I am especially happy that you like Azul/Idia. They are our first twst ship, they are actually the first twst ship that we’ve written headcanons about, and our first post with them was almost a year ago?? That’s a long time, but I still feel like we just fell in love with these two lol

Just in case, here are some previous posts with hcs about them:

The very first one

Some more headcanons (+the ones about the Marriage AU)

The one with octo!Azul

The one about the overblot versions of these two

There are also some about Idia and the OctaTrio, but you can find all of them in the according tag (“headcanons”), so I won’t link them here.

As you can see, we have a lot to say about them lol, but it’s been a while since our last hc post about them, so I’ll give you some new ones! God I hope they’re new… I hate it when I accidentally repeat myself lol

They are an odd couple because both are allergic to sincerity and have a hard time opening up to each other. It’s almost like they’re afraid that if they say something honest and romantic, the other one is going to laugh at him. And to be honest, Azul is worse at it than Idia. Like, Idia’s initial reaction would be laugh it off and say that Azul is cringe (as a defense mechanism), but he would actually appreciate it a lot and maybe even open up in return. Azul, however, is absolutely terrified of being rejected for his feelings and sometimes has a hard time reacting to Idia’s own sincere moments. But he’s slowly getting better, I guess.

Despite that, Azul is actually quite romantic sometimes. If he falls asleep in Idia’s room, he clings to him, his long limbs, his warm hair. He is actually quite needy when he lets his guard down. But Idia learned not to comment on that, because Azul instantly gets embarrassed and super pissed off and sometimes even bites him :( Ouch

They actually argue quite often. And god forbid if they argue about something that can’t easily get googled and prove one of them wrong, because this petty argument is going to last for ages. Sometimes it ends up being an arousing thing for them, but Idia always comments on how much of a cliché it is to yell at each other and then make out passionately.

Their sex life used to be super awkward at the very beginning of their relationship, because they are basically a combo of a socially inept hikki guy whose kinks and preferences are super far detached from a real human life, and a merman who didn’t have legs or human reproductive organs only 3 years ago. So they weren’t even super into sex at first, it’s just too much mental and physical work, too awkward and embarrassing. That being said, they did have their early horny moments when they got really carried away and way too into touching each other.

After they’ve been together for some time though, sex is going to become less stressful, at least for Azul. He learns very fast, and he is obsessed with getting better, so Idia is going to be overwhelmed and fucked in all the right places at the same time lol But they still have these vibes of two awkward but horny nerds sometimes.

There are periods during which they don’t have sex at all, and barely even have any romantic interactions. During these one might even think that they’re just friends, since they seem to be very neutral in the ways they interact and talk about games and stuff. Idia doesn’t mind it, but it’s a bit wild even to him sometimes how not interested in sex Azul actually is…because when Azul is aroused, it seems like sex is the most important thing in his life lol I guess this is an animal within him.

They aren’t really into bdsm, but they’re one of those couples who fall into the d/s dynamics naturally sometimes for some reason. Mostly because Idia is very bratty with Azul and likes to tease him, and sometimes Azul gets pissed off and reacts in a very dominating and overwhelming way, and then all of a sudden things happen… Let’s just say that Idia got spanked more than one time.

[envious-dior]

SKIN CARE SCIENTIST HEADCANONS

headcanons if you, a scientist, were apart of grace augustine’s team and managed to score not one, not two, but THREE hotties !! (tsu’tey, neytiri and our favorite colonizer, jake !!)

i will format this properly and prettily LATER

i have HEADCANONS and THOTS and they need to be released

that’s so emo of me tehe !!! “released”

okay back to one of my previous posts about YOU (but not really you, it’s just an OC without a name really) being on augustine’s team and literally only being there for skincare purposes

you bedazzled your name tag, you have a pink lab coat and bedazzled goggles !!! queen shit

its actually hilarious bc you probably only got recruited after writing a compliant about her book on botany bc it didn’t have the properties on how it does with human skin, is it a natural moisturizer or sunscreen or what auggie ???

and that somehow got you recruited

you are always talking back and need to have the last word she HATES you

jake on the other ??? y’all are BESTIES. he ADORES you to pieces

you call him “meals on wheels” after hearing lyle make a comment about it (again) bc you thought it was hilarious. you are the only he doesn’t mind hearing it from !!

anyways you and jake are besties from day one !!

this will be a fic one day and bc i self project, you now have curly hair (you are tender headed like me :(( )

you are FLABBERGASTED when your avatar has straight hair bro you are LIVID

you went on a rant for like five minutes after seeing your avatar and jake literally went heart eyes on you, baby boy has been crushing since DAY ONE

you, on the other hand, have not !!

he adores it when you complain. you complain a lot.

youre probably a privileged kid, you hate bugs, but adore the floral life of pandora. you are literally sobbing on your uncomfortable bed as you hear, whatever pandora adjacent of a cricket is, making noise near your ears you are trembling and you are complaining to anyone who will listen

jake is listening and has definitely killed more bugs than he could count

you are there when jake runs away to play with the flowers !!

and you look hot, auggie (grace augustine, you call her auggie) forbade you from wearing your skirts but you have jean shirts, a blouse tucked in or whatever, your killing shir !! girl boss girl queen !!

jake decides to fucking KILL YALL but taunting wild animals

you hate white men

you do not have an athletic bone in your body, you are literally whining and he’s telling you to stfu.

do you listen ??? no absolutely not, why listen to a white boy who was in the military ?? there is no good reason too !!!

yea Neytiri hates the absolute both of yall when she’s stalking y’all

you are also going heart eyes on her, as well as jake . jake type of people is people who are way out of his league apparently, or rich heirs(heiresses)

jakes trying to flirt while you’re absolutely silent bc lordy lord SHES SO PRETTY !!!

she had a symmetrical face, wide doe eyes and pretty lips you literally don’t stop thinking about her features, she’s so pretty you cannot look away

she thinks ur the fucking weirdest bro

but tsu’tey ??? TSU’TEY ???

you love a man whose holding a literal blade to your queue !!!! jake has an awkward hard on he doesn’t know whether to be jealous of you or tsu’tey

in this au ?? POLY RELATIONSHIPS RAAAAAAAAH

your probably semi-fluent in navi bc… ur actually meant to be on pandora lol

you tug on jake’s ear when he tries to approach etyukan (??? idk how to spell his name yall sorry) and now ensures a mini argument between the two of you

"JACOB CAN YOU FUCKING NOT—”

i wholeheartedly believe in jake sully’s full name being jacob timothy sully

it’s just right i cannot explain it he looks like a jacob timothy sully

ur mini dispute is only interrupted by mo’at whose touching all over you

you ??? heart eyes. you love her voice, the way she speaks, how she pronounces certain words !!!

i love mo’at and her voice she’s amazing she’s everything to me

she probably hates you

“im apart of the jarhead clan 🤓” you are stifling GIGGLED

BECAUSE THATS SO STUPID ??? ITS STUPID !!

you explain that ur a scientist, but ur not just any scientist, youre a cool scientist !! skincare RAAAAAH !!

they are not impressed with you. tsu’tey, who you decided that you will marry one day, is snorting at your words and calls you an idiot.

you are HEARTBROKEN

jake is now stifling his own giggles

he doesn’t laugh he GIGGLES he’s my lil meowmeow

mo’at decides neytiri will have to teach jake and you their ways, you are definitely complaining bc you can’t run without bursting a lung but she shoots you a look and you instantly quiet down

because it’s mo’at if she tells me to stfu, im shutting the fuck up what can i say

neytiri has to deal with two dimbasses and tsu’tey laughs until mo’at decides he’s also helping

PLOT TWIST !!!

yea that’s all i got im so tired imma head to sleep yall goodnight

[depressopax]

Dale cooper nsfw alphabet pls

I got you anon!!! I'd love to post the whole thing now, but didn't have the inspiration 😭 Sorryyy Will post the next parts soon!! <3

Dale Cooper NSFW alphabet

Fandom - Twin Peaks

Pairing: Dale Cooper x gender neutral reader Genre: Smut, headcanons Warning(s): Sexual content. Reader is gender neutral and referred to as "partner" Words: 700 Summary: Dale Cooper NSFW headcanons, part 1 A-F English is not my main language, if I make any spelling mistakes please let me know so I can improve my writing! <3

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

Have said it before and will say it again

AFTERCARE KING!

Loves giving and receiving aftercare.

Sex with him can get intense - whether he’s on top or he’s bottom. 

So he appreciates some good aftercare 

He showers you with love. 

Letting you know how well you did, how good it felt etc…

Homeboy is an overthinker. He’s anxious he did something wrong “Was it good to you?”“Did I hurt you?”“Are you ok, my love?”

He also appreciates receiving aftercare after being submissive to him

Absolutely LOVES when you stroke his hair and lets him rest his head against your chest

Taking baths together, massages… You name it.

He doesn’t like going to sleep in a mess, so he cleans you and himself up, and offers to fix the bed if things get messy.

A cuddler <3

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

Dale: His hands. He likes the way they can make you feel. And oh boy he knows how to use his hands. 

His fingers are long, not so thick but he definitely knows how to curl them to give you pleasure.

He really likes giving you handjobs/fingering you.

…And covering your mouth with his hand, having you sucking on his fingers when you moan to loudly

Like I said, he’s skilled with his hands and takes pride in the things he can do. (...I think I have a thing for hands, sorry not sorry)

You: - Non-sexual: Your eyes. He could stare into your eyes for hours and never get tired of them. - Sexually; he loves your lips. 

The sounds that leave your mouth during sex, the way those pretty lips feel wrapped around his cock… 

And the way you bite your lip drives him wild, too.

I mean, what’s there not to love?

Also I feel like he’s an ass guy. 

Big or small cake? 

…He eats both ;)

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

He doesn’t like leaving a mess, so he likes finishing inside condoms

…If you use condoms, ofc.

He thinks it’s hot to finish on your body, usually your face or chest, but he wouldn’t admit that. 

When you cum, he doesn’t mind a mess tho.

He likes watching you finish and is always amazed by how he manages to make you feel so good

Definitely helps you clean up after you climax

Not with a towel tho iykwim… 🤭

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

Dale has a thing for orgasm-denial, edging and overstimulation.

Sometimes when he jerks off, he edges himself just to “spice it up”

Likes it when his partners do these things to him.

There's something about the frustration of it that turns him on. He’s turned on by the thought of you having complete control of him, not even letting him control his own releases. 

He thinks doing these things to you is fun too lol

Watching you tear up as he keep denying your orgasm 

Driving you to the point where you whimper and beg for him is extremely attractive

And the intense orgasms you have when he finally allows them… 

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

He’s had a few partners before, so he knows what he’s doing.

Still, he was nervous his first time with you.

He wanted to make it feel good for the both of you

He’d be especially nervous if it was your first time

Dale is very observant and keep track of how you react 

This way, he figures out just how to touch you to make you satisfied

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

Dale likes the “classic” positions. 

His fav is definitely missionary.

He likes how intimate it is, and wants to see your face when he thrusts into you

He also likes 69, so he can tease you with his tongue, whilst getting taken care of.

[layraket]

I saw your post saying asks for the creatures gang au were open so

1) what type of creature is everyone? (I've seen a few post, but I don't think I know what EVERYONE is)

2) what is everyone's favorite food?

3) do they do snuggles? If so, who is most likely to curl up together?

4) of those with fur, who's is the softest?

KJDSK SORRY IF I START RAMBLING I JUST WOKE UP AND THE HEADCANONS ARE HEADCANONING

1) I tried to make them all something that is related to their adventure AND will make sense in their quests, so we have:

Wind - Seagull

Four - Mouse

Hyrule - Fairy

Wild - Fox

Legend - Rabbit

Sky - Loftwing

Twilight - Wolf (well it would be more a mix between a german shepherd and a wolf if we go with the technicalls)

Warriors - Lion

Time - Wolf

Twilight is able to turn hylian, the same with Hyrule! the only diference is that Twilight uses the aid of the light spirits, while Hyrule is able to do this for himself

im still deciding if make this also something that Four can do, but i'll see when i finish playing minish cap lol

As an extra theres also Ravio who is a bunny and Malon who is a German Shepherd!

if i remember correctly i also added Spirit somewhere, who is a draft horse

2)

Wind: There's this old lady in Outset island that took care of him and Aryll when their parents never came back, she makes the best fish soup! she always give them some

Four: Loves the pastries in Castle Town! Always goes to visit the minish there to have a chat and taste all the sweet bread

Hyrule: Anything tooth-rooting sweet! but fruits like strawberries are his personal favorites, in his era there's not much of them to taste (thats why Wild's Hyrule is one of his favs behind Legend's)

Wild: This damn fox eats anything that can enter his mouth. But! He loves a lot fish, he visits frequently Zora's domain and Sidon always gives him some, the same in Lurelin Village after the locals got used to his presence

Legend: Apples, also red poppies are one of his personal favorites, Ravio always find some when they explore around the forest

Sky: This bird loves fish a lot, and since he got to taste the trouts in the surface they became his favorites

Twilight: Yeto's soup, he got to taste it while hylian, and hes glad that he did that, he didnt thought that the soup could get better with wolf hair. A second place is definetly baked cucco

Warriors: See this giant cat? he's completly in love with Hyrule's food since he got to taste it, his personal favorite being the beef of Castle Town

Time: since a puppy he has been feed with a simpler diet, mostly tiny roedors and some fruit, but since he got to stay in the ranch his fav is fried cucco eggs, Malon has to talk with the cuccos cuz they dont let him near to take the eggs tho

3) Absolutely. Twilight is very protective with the ones he consider pack, so he express his love with a lot of physical touch. He always tries to stay close to Time, and keeps company Wild as he is almost like a pup in his eyes. He tried with Legend, that rabbit's bite is strong

Wild, Legend and Hyrule cuddle together a lot, sometimes Four joins them

Sky mother hen's everyone, he's the biggest in the chain and even Time or Wars cant escape his big wings covering them completly. The only one who isn't found of him is Wind

Wind stays very close to Warriors, always on his back and sleeps covered by his scarf and mane, Four also joins them sometimes, being the smallest one makes him very pocket sized for everyone

4)

have you seen Wars?

i mean yeah Twilight looks very fluffy, Legend too

but this is a big kitty who we are talking abt

i rest my case