#Some people here r actually retarded

[chibichibsterss]

I think some people r just projecting atp abt the "rapefren" bullshit like where in the comic is it depicted that Randal or whatever would diddle someone. Like hes a 15 year old who likes katy perry and neopet simulators what the fuck r u on abt u retard, you're gross and stupid.

[dogbound1128]

I seem to only find out things about myself by doing something completely unrelated to mental health and them reminding me of an issue

[purple-babygirl]

don't call me daddy

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x little!f!reader

Word count: 4,826

Summary : In a world where littles are openly themselves, they volunteer to help and be helped by willing caregivers. In spite of himself, Bucky finds himself stuck with one and to keep the nagging away, he has to learn how to be around her with everything that that entails.

Warnings: Bucky is mean, a couple of insults, mistreatment of age regressed reader, crying, mentions of hot liquid getting on skin, crying, mentions of the r-word and the s-word, Bucky's PTSD & nightmares

A/N: so this is an idea I've had for forever and I finally mustered up enough courage to share it with you guys. Please enjoy and let me know what you think and if you have anything you'd like to suggest for the upcoming parts. I love you 💜

~

“This sounds stupid,” Bucky grumbled when Sam suggested the program.

“It's not stupid, Buck and it works!”

“If it worked for you doesn't mean it's gonna work for me, Sam. You have patience and it's in your nature to want to take care of people.”

“Says the one who looked out for Steve all his life!”

“Steve was one person and he was actually dumb, he wasn’t acting like he can't fucking feed himself!”

“They're not acting. They're age regressed.” Sam tried to remain calm.

“What does that even mean!”

“It means—”

“You know what? I don't care because I'm not doing it.” Bucky smiled before leaving Sam's house and going back to hide in his own.

But Sam was persistent. He was determined to get Bucky help that would actually help. So he suggested the program to Bucky's therapist and before Bucky could punch him, she was having him sign the contract.

“Sam, I don't wanna meet anyone. It's not gonna work anyway so let's just pick any of them.”

“They're not service dogs, Bucky!”

“Really? Because that's exactly what it sounds like they are to me.”

Sam glared at him, elbowing his side as a short lady with a kind smile approached them.

Bucky didn't pay her much attention. He didn't want to be here and he didn't care what she was reciting.

Only thing that caught his attention was when she asked him what age he would prefer so she could introduce him to a group of littles.

He was dreading this. It was stupid.

“…what are you looking for?” Bucky caught the end of her talk with Sam.

“I don't know, someone who can talk like they're not retarded,” he answered the lady rudely and she smiled in understanding when Sam apologized.

“They're not retarded. All of them are perfectly healthy and okay. They're age regressed,” she told Bucky and he rolled his eyes so hard he felt they might never return from the back of his head.

He hated those two words. Age regressed, what the fuck did that even mean?

“Maybe we can meet some of the littles who are not so young, like 6 year olds?” Sam suggested and she nodded, leading them to a building with long corridors and lots of doors.

Bucky could see adult women and men playing with dolls, sleeping with pacifiers and some of them even had other people feeding them.

What the hell was this place? Did they expect him to do that? With a person perfectly capable of handling his or her own self but chooses not to?! Was this the 21st century? Because he didn’t like it very much.

The lady led them inside her office and got a group of files out of some organized drawer. She'd barely laid them out on the table before Bucky was slamming his finger on one.

“We'll take this one,” he said, staring at the lady in disinterest.

“But you haven't even seen them,” Sam said between his teeth, kicking his leg under the table. He wished Bucky cared enough to do this right.

“I've seen enough. I pick this file and I wanna leave,” Bucky seethed back.

“This is Doll. She's one of the softest littles I've ever met and I think you've made a great choice, Mr. Barnes.”

“You call her Doll?”

“Yes, real names aren't revealed for the privacy of our littles unless they decide otherwise and she chose the name herself when she joined us.” The lady smiled kindly, making Bucky even madder.

“Whatever, let's get this over with. Tell her to come so we could leave.”

“Mr. Barnes, I have to admit your attitude towards this is very concerning and I fear I cannot risk the peace of our littles who confide in us to find them safe partners! Like I said she's one of the gentlest and I need to know you're going to treat her right before I even let you meet her!” The woman voiced her concerns and Bucky sighed.

He couldn't blow this now. He's come far enough with this whole process and if he went back to his therapist like that she was definitely going to get out her dreadful notebook.

He had to take this girl home tonight or else they would make him go through this same process over and over again.

“I'm sorry. I'm just a little confused, I guess.” Bucky scratched his beard.

“That's okay.” She smiled again, “most of our visitors are, but you can always ask.”

“Well— what is wrong with them?!” He exclaimed, gesturing with his hands in the air.

Sam kicked him again and glared.

“What? She said I could ask!”

“It's okay,” she told Sam with a chuckle.

“Nothing is wrong with them. Them regressing in age is their way to cope and relieve anxiety or deal with other mental illnesses such as traumatic experiences, or even just stress. It's a freer, calmer state of mind for them to return to when it's no longer easy for them to be big.”

Her calm, kind manner while explaining this made Bucky even angrier inside. This wasn’t normal and they should all stop acting like it was.

“So they're supposed to be helping me with my issues but they're dealing with their own issues?”

Like he originally thought, this was stupid.

“Yes, it's a mutual helping program.” The lady confirmed.

“Oh. And what's this Doll's issue?”

“Doll reverts to age regression as a coping mechanism for her depression and PTSD. She's been doing great lately actually!”

“Is she suddenly gonna go grownup or?” Bucky continued, involuntarily asking every question on his mind.

“No, like I said, Doll reverts to little space for the comfort and safety of it and while she can coax herself out of her headspace, she rarely ever chooses to.”

“But she can?”

“Yes. But I need to tell you, Mr. Barnes, that this is not why you're here.” She reminded, wanting to ensure the safety of self expression for the little one.

“I know.”

“I also need you to promise me to be a good caregiver for her. She's a sweet girl and I can guarantee she will be good for you.”

“I promise.” Bucky knew he was lying but he couldn’t care less about his honesty at the moment.

“And it’s never acceptable to make fun of her or try to force her into a more grownup headspace. That only makes it worse and her mind regresses further.”

“So what she becomes younger?!” He was trying so hard not to get frustrated, why make him!

“That's correct.” She nodded.

“How young?” Sam asked.

“The youngest she's ever been is 4.”

“Oh.” Great. Just great.

“She can still talk just fine,” she reassured them, knowing Bucky didn't want anyone who couldn't talk or seemed 'retarded'.

“Okay, good.” Bucky nodded, wanting to get out of the place as soon as possible.

“Would you like to meet Doll now or do you wanna take a look at the rest of the files?”

“I'll meet her.” Bucky stood up, hand already at the doorknob.

~

The meeting thing went relatively well and Bucky was surprised the girl wasn't intimidated by his frown or intense stare. She was mesmerized by the metal arm even.

He wasn't going to lie to himself, he still thought this whole thing was dumb but he needed to convince his therapist and everyone that he was okay again so they'd leave him alone.

She didn’t ask him any questions or have any conditions. She just stared at him with wide, sparkly eyes.

A minute later he heard the girl whisper her agreement to the short lady.

Apparently, she was big enough to make the decision to leave with a strange man she didn't know but not enough to properly dress herself or sleep without a damn toy.

Bucky was relieved anyway; glad she was idiotic enough to choose him so he wouldn't have to meet with any other 'littles'. And she wasn't ugly to look at either.

The old lady had a word with her privately before she was packing a bag and they were on their way to Bucky’s place.

~

“Where do I stay, daddy?”

Bucky hasn’t said a word to her since they’d left the institution. He made her carry her bag from the car to the elevator and from the elevator inside the apartment. He wasn’t going to be nobody’s maid.

She was physically capable and that didn’t need a professional to see it.

“I don’t know, figure it out.” Bucky shrugged, kicking his shoes off by the door and stepping inside.

She followed his lead and neatly placed her shoes at the corner by the door as well.

“Where do you want me to stay, daddy?” she asked politely, wanting to make him comfortable, seeing he was the owner of the house.

He was making her a little nervous.

This wasn’t his energy back at the institution and she tried her best not to get scared.

“I don't want you. I never did,” Bucky told her the minute she sat on his couch, throwing his keys on the wooden coffee table, “We're just gonna pretend your presence here is changing something and then I'm gonna return you.”

I don't want you.

She's definitely heard that before.

Return her. Like she was some sort of item. She wasn't what he wanted and it cracked her trained-to-love heart.

“Yes, daddy,” she replied brokenly, tears threatening to spill over the rims of her eyes.

Nothing was worse than feeling unwanted.

“Don't call me that.” Bucky snapped.

“B— But you're my daddy.” She was seriously confused now. Why would he pick her if he didn’t want this?

“I'm not your anything and stop acting so small, you look grown up enough to me.”

Why did he take her home if he didn’t like her and didn’t want to be her Daddy?

“I'm not acting.” Tears rolled down her cheeks and she felt more insecure than ever.

“Yeah, yeah, you're age regressed. Whatever, just don't call me that. I'm no one's daddy.” Bucky took his shirt off throwing it on the couch beside her, making her flinch.

“But what should I call you if not—”

“Call me Mr. Barnes, if you're so keen on being polite.” Bucky rolled his eyes.

“Yes, Mr. Barnes.” She sniffled.

“And stop crying.” He huffed.

“Yes, Mr. Barnes.” She quickly wiped at her face, holding the rest of her tears inside and forcing the lump in her throat further down.

Bucky muttered something under his breath before snatching his shirt and leaving to the bathroom, slamming the door behind him as she flinched again.

He didn't say she was a good girl for calling him what he wanted, or for stopping her crying when she was told to. He didn't like her and he wanted to return her.

What was she supposed to do until he sent her back? He didn't want her help even if they said he needed it.

Was it going to be like this for the next 3 months? How was she going to do all of the grown up stuff if Daddy Mr. Barnes didn't help her? How was she going to live? And why did she still care to try her best to be good for the harsh, blue-eyed man?

~

She didn’t know what to do so she sloppily changed her clothes by herself, putting her socks in the hamper to be washed like a good girl.

She washed her hands and feet by herself, unknowingly making Bucky think he was right all along about letting her do things on her own as she should.

That was until he put a hot cup of instant noodles before her for dinner though. He refused to help her eat and she accidentally spilled hot soup over her hand and the wooden table. It was chaos.

Bucky cursed out loud and she started crying in pain.

He had enough pity on her to drag her to the bathroom and put her hand under the cold water. If his hold on her arm hurt, she didn’t say anything.

“Keep it there, don’t you dare move.”

“Mr. Barnes, don’t leave,” she sniffled, eyes red and in pain.

“I’m not leaving you in the Sahara desert.” Bucky rolled his eyes, “I gotta go clean the mess you made.” He left her in the bathroom and she kept her hand under the water, not daring to move like she was told.

“How hard is it to eat fucking noodles! It’s not quantum physics!” Bucky muttered angrily as he wiped the soup off the table with a cloth.

“Fuck that age regression shit I am done!” He took their noodle cups to the kitchen and dumped both in the bin.

“What are you still doing in there! It’s not like you got burnt by lava!” Bucky shouted to her, walking to the bathroom.

“I— I— Mr. Barnes, you told me not to move.” She began crying again at his angry demeanor.

“For fuck’s sake,” Bucky groaned, “do you ever stop crying?!”

“I’m s-sorry.” She hiccupped. She didn’t know what to say or how to please him she just wanted him to stop glaring at her. She was scared.

“Get out of there and dry your hands,” Bucky told her, sitting on the couch with a sigh.

“Yes, Mr. Barnes.” Came her chocked whisper.

“Does it hurt?” Bucky asked when she came out of the bathroom, tears drying on her cheeks.

The question surprised her. Maybe he did care after all.

“Burns a little,” she told him, pointing to the back of her hand where the skin got burnt.

“I might have a cream here somewhere,” he said, trying his best to keep an unconcerned expression on.

She took a look around when Bucky stood up to look in the kitchen. It was a cozy place and she wasn’t too needy but she couldn’t help but wonder about where she was going to sleep.

There didn’t seem to be enough furniture in here.

“Try not to touch it and you should be fine in the morning,” Bucky instructed after applying the burns cream to the sensitive area of skin.

“Thank you, Mr. Barnes.” She whispered before absentmindedly pecking Bucky’s cheek.

Bucky’s eyes widened at her guts. He certainly didn’t see that coming. It was her first night here how was she so bold!

His breath stuttered out of his lungs but he quickly recomposed himself.

Bucky’s jaw clenched and he gave her a dark stare.

“Do you have a death wish?”

“N— No.” She quickly shook her head.

“Did I give you permission to do that?”

“No.” She shook her head again, sort of knowing where this was going. She was going to get punished.

“Then why’d you do it?” Bucky sneered through his teeth.

“To th— thank Mr. Barnes.” He made her so nervous she could barely hear herself answer him.

Bucky hated her. She had no sense of boundaries. He hated the way she cried all the time. He hated the way she referred to him in third person.

He hated her.

“You already said that, didn’t you?”

She nodded.

“Don’t do it again.” Was all Bucky said and she was relieved.

“Yes, Mr. Barnes.”

Bucky scoffed and stood up to put the cream back where he found it.

~

Turned out, Bucky had no bed. He slept on the floor and he didn’t need one.

“But where do I sleep, Mr. Barnes?” She asked in a small voice.

“Anywhere that is not next to me,” Bucky replied, not even sparing her a glance.

“Can I sleep here?” she asked, patting the couch.

“Suit yourself.”

“Thank you, Mr. Barnes.” She gave a shy smile.

“I didn’t make the damn couch. Just go to sleep.”

“Bad word again,” she whispered.

“What was that?” Bucky raised an eyebrow.

“Nothing.” She slammed a hand on her mouth.

“Repeat what you just said if you know what’s good for you.” Bucky glared.

“I— Mr. Barnes said a bad word,” she whispered shakily.

“Yeah, well, it’s my house! I’ll talk however I want!” Bucky raised his voice.

“Yes, Mr. Barnes.” She nodded, not even thinking about arguing that he shouldn’t curse in front of a little.

“Go to sleep.”

“Yes, Mr. Barnes.” She quickly plopped on the couch, covering herself with a blanket, and burying her face in a cushion.

Bucky almost chuckled; almost thought it was cute but he shook the smile off his face quickly and sighed, taking his shirt off and getting himself on the hard floor, easily falling asleep.

He always falls asleep so fast because nightmares usually wake him up few hours after; he be waiting for bed time all day.

She peeked from under the blanket when she heard Bucky snore, carefully tiptoeing to her bag to get her stuffie. She took one look at shirtless Bucky, her cheeks heating up, before sliding back under the covers on the couch.

Her Daddy that didn’t like to be called Daddy was beautiful.

~

It has started again. He’s chasing a person, he corners them to where they could not run anymore, his left hand wraps around their throat, they struggle and beg and then snap. He kills them.

Bucky startled awake, having a hard time taking his breath only to find her on the floor next to him.

Her eyes were full of worry and maybe even sympathy as she clutched a stuffed animal. Bucky didn’t like it.

“It’s okay, Daddy— Mr. Barnes. ‘T was just a bad dream.” She whispered, dropping her stuffie to wrap her short arms around Bucky.

He wouldn’t admit it but it felt nice to be held. Something inside him wanted to succumb to the gentleness of her gesture. But Bucky shut that down at once.

“Get off,” Bucky huffed tiredly as the girl clung to him and rubbed his sweaty back.

“But—”

“Get. Off.” He repeated, grinding his teeth and she reluctantly slipped off his lap and went back to her spot on the floor.

She stared at him as he panted and frowned for a second before leaving the room.

Bucky scoffed, rubbing a hand down his hot face. She probably went to cry in the bathroom again; such a crybaby.

Except she didn’t.

She returned with a relatively cool glass of water, only half full. She didn't want to be bad and spill.

“I got you water, Mr. Barnes.” She carefully got on her knees and offered him the cup.

“Stop saying my name so much.” Bucky snatched the cup out of her hand, gulping down the water without showing an ounce of gratitude.

She pouted, crawling to her bag to get him tissues because she didn’t see any around.

“So you do know how to act around liquids after all.” Bucky taunted, still not over the fact that she spilled soup over his table before taking the tissues from her to wipe his forehead.

“Do you want me to sing you a lullaby, Mr. Barnes? It helps me after bad dreams.” She suggested, desperately hoping he would let her help.

“Not all of us act like kids to flee our nightmares.”

“Mr. Barnes.” Her eyes filled with tears and it was the last thing Bucky wanted to deal with, “I’m not acting.”

She was hurt but he didn’t care. He said what he said.

“Get back on the couch, I wanna go to sleep.” Bucky dismissed, pushing the empty glass against the wall.

“Yes, Mr. Barnes.” She whispered dejectedly, taking her friend and crawling back to the couch.

~

The same thing happened every night for another four nights. At this point she was really worried about the man she started singing lullabies anyway, not waiting for his permission.

“Hey, you!”

“Doll,” she corrected.

“Whatever! Shut up already. I told you I don’t need your stupid singing.” Bucky growled into his pillow.

He was lying. He hated admitting it but he was. Her voice was actually angelic. He never went back to sleep again after a nightmare but that changed when she ignored his wishes and started singing. Bucky could drift off again to her soft voice.

He could get more hours of nightmareless sleep because of her lullabies. But he was too stubborn to admit anything that came from her was working for him.

It must be a coincidence. He probably fell asleep again because he was exhausted from being mad at her all day.

“I know Mr. Barnes doesn’t need it. It’s for me.” She lied as well. She knew lying wasn’t good girl like but she was helping Mr. Barnes; it was for good reason.

~

“Mr. Barnes,” her small voice called to him but Bucky was ignoring her.

He was pretending he couldn’t hear her and continued staring at the TV because she talked too much for his liking.

“Mr. Barnes.” She ever so lightly touched Bucky’s arm.

“What!” he spit suddenly, making her jump.

“We— We need to go shopping. Mrs. Morrison will visit tomorrow.”

She knew the process and for some reason didn’t want to be taken away from Bucky.

If Mrs. Morrison came and saw the way the apartment was or the way Bucky treated Doll, she was definitely going to make her leave with her.

“What?!”

“It’s day five.” She reminded, tilting her head to the side.

“Yeah, so?” Bucky’s body fully turned to face her.

“Tomorrow’s visit day. We have to go shopping.”

“How do I know you’re not lying just to get me to buy you things?”

“I don’t lie, Mr. Barnes.” She assured him, looking hurt at even the suggestion.

“It’s in the papers,” she told him, referring to the contract he’s signed as well as the guide he was provided with her file before leaving the institution.

Bucky narrowed his eyes at her, but stood up to look at the papers he’d carelessly shoved in a drawer in the kitchen a few days ago.

“Shit,” he muttered when he saw she wasn’t lying. He heard her whisper bad word but chose to ignore it.

There were scheduled visits listed with different time intervals between each visit for the next three months.

Bucky groaned, throwing the paper sheet back in the drawer and slamming it shut.

“Put your clothes on, we’re going fucking shopping.”

“Bad word.”

“Don’t even—” she ran to the bathroom to change before Bucky could get angrier.

What has Sam gotten him into?

~

“Why’s your hair so messy!” Bucky asked, shoving her out of his way to grab a jar of peanut butter and put in the cart.

“I don’t know how to do it on my own an’ Mr. Barnes kept telling me to hurry up.”

Her voice was so small and if Bucky wasn’t so infuriated by the situation he would’ve felt bad for how he spoke to her.

“You’d think you’d actually look decent enough after taking forever to get ready.” Bucky huffed.

She remained silent, looking down and closing in on herself.

“Do you eat this?” Bucky asked, waving a box of corn flakes in front of her.

“Yes, Mr. Barnes.”

Bucky nodded, throwing the box in the cart.

“Didn’t I tell you to stop saying my name so much?”

“I’m sorry, Mr. Barn—” Bucky’s cold stare stopped the word on her tongue.

“Call me Bucky.”

He didn’t want her to call him Bucky. But if that Mrs. Morrison was visiting tomorrow she couldn’t know he made her speak to him formally.

“Bucky?”

“Bucky.”

“Yes, Bucky.” She smiled shyly, feeling one step closer to the man.

Bucky didn’t know his life would turn upside down so fast.

He never cared about grocery shopping because he didn’t need that much stuff and he mostly ate at restaurants or diners or bought take out. He mainly just had beer filling his fridge.

But with her tied to him now he was buying all kinds of food: fresh vegetables and fruits, juice boxes, snack bars and way too many Oreos. Not to mention the toiletries he had to pay for because aside from her tooth and hair brushes, she came with nothing.

“Bucky, can we please get this?” she asked, pointing to a stuffed white wolf.

“No, you already have one at home. I see it every night.”

“Please, Bucky, please. Pretty please,” she begged, giving puppy eyes and pressing her palms together even.

“Okay, fine, shut up. God!” Bucky grumpily put the toy in the cart and got them to the nearest cashier before she could pick anything else.

She was so happy and was going to cherish her new stuffie more than ever.

~

Bucky was pacing back and forth in the living room. He needed to find a way to convince her not to tell Mrs. Morrison or whatever her name was how he treated her.

He didn’t want her to know she had any type of power over him because of the situation.

Bucky definitely wasn’t going to say please, but he also knew he couldn’t scare her into saying what he wanted.

“Bucky, please go to bed. Wolfie can’t sleep.” She whined, hugging her newest stuffie to her heart.

Bucky gave her yet another hard glare. She made him so angry that sometimes he forgot how to function. She was so spoiled and oblivious.

“I won’t say anything to Mrs. Morrison,” she whispered.

“You think I care what you have to say?! They could take you right now for all I care!” Bucky replied angrily.

“I know…” she mumbled, “I don’t want them to.”

Her words left Bucky without a reply. He was confused. She didn’t want to leave? Why not? Bucky hasn’t said one kind word to her since she’s been entrusted to him.

Was she some type of masochist?

“I wanna stay with Bucky. Sing him lullabies and eat noodles with him,” she said, her voice soft and heavy with sleep, before her eyes shut as she drifted off.

Her words put Bucky at ease for now and he got on the floor to finally try to get some sleep. He tried to ignore the way they affected him though.

~

“Bucky,” she called gently.

“Hmm.”

“I need to shower,” came her timid whisper.

“Do you see me using the bathroom?! Help yourself.” Bucky huffed, stirring the sugar in his mug.

“I can’t.”

“What do you mean you can’t?!” he snapped, throwing the spoon in the sink.

“I need Bucky’s help.” Her face was on fire with embarrassment of having to say this out loud.

“For fuck’s sake,” Bucky rolled his eyes, pushing his mug aside before grabbing her arm and pushing her to the bathroom.

She whimpered as they stood before the glass door of the shower.

“This, because you’re not stupid you’re just age regressed, opens the hot water.” Bucky pointed to the tap handle on the right. “This opens the cold water. And this—”

“Bucky, that’s not what I need help with.” She shook her head, biting down on her lip.

“What do you want from me then?!” Bucky had no patience and her bashfulness wasn’t helping.

She raised her arms up before whispering, “I need Bucky to gimme a shower.”

“Are you fucking kidding me?”

“Bad word.”

“Don’t start now! You don’t know how to shower?!”

She shook her head, pouting as her eyes got teary again, “not when little.”

“This is bullshit. I didn’t even wanna do this. Damn you, Sam Wilson!” Bucky said, walking out of the bathroom angrily as she trailed behind him like the lost puppy she was.

“Bad word.”

“Stop!” Bucky boomed and she put her hands behind her back timidly.

“Please, Bucky,” she begged, getting hold of his hand.

“No! On my dead body!”

~

“Stand straight or I swear I’m gonna leave you here and go!”

“Yes, Bucky,” she giggled, the water trickling down her spine tickling her.

“Now what?” He huffed, trying not to stare at her naked chest.

“Now, this.” She held up the bottle of conditioner for him and Bucky sighed before taking it and squeezing some on his hand.

He was about to smooth it down her scalp when she moved away.

“No, no! This goes on the ends or else it gives you dandruff,” She said and Bucky would’ve facepalmed so hard if it wasn’t for the slippery matter covering his palms.

This was going to be long.

~

She was fast asleep on Bucky’s couch after her shower, so peaceful and without a care in the world.

Bucky envied her as he got in place on the floor. He really wished he had enough flexibility in him to accept help and care from someone.

But no, he didn't need her. He didn't need any of this. He just had to go through tomorrow and the rest will figure itself out.

Yeah, yeah just tomorrow for now, Bucky thought as he drifted off.

part II

~

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[sideysvault]

*ੈ✩‧₊ Mundane Intervention *ੈ✩‧₊˚

Pairing: Michael Gavey x fem!reader

wc: 1,200k

Tags: [sfw] Mature themes, strong language, one use of the r slur, bullying, tension and a fluffy ending.

Read part two. [C. Soon]

────────

The Cathedral City looked as solemn as usual. The yellow stones shined in contrast against the pale green of the grass. Its baroque interior inspired respect in you, a bubbling sensation of awe. Even still, after all this time. The conversation your friends were having felt borderline sacrilegious. And it did scandalize you, to say the least. But then again, rich people’s brains seemed to be wired differently, that was another thing that you still couldn’t get used to. But it was the only group that had taken you in so far. The library engulfed the group, and the lame conversation that was being held was cushioned and absorbed by the old books.

“He’s like, a total retard”

Your body instinctively tenses upon hearing the term. The bad taste left from your childhood flooded every pore on your skin. You tried to concentrate on something else.

The weather constantly changed to sunny intervals by lunchtime. But you were sure that it would rain tonight. You could feel the humidity in the air, and the tense breeze.

“A mate of mine told me he goes around screaming at people to ask him sums”

A snort came out of someone’s mouth.

“What a pathetic party favor”

They were getting increasingly louder, and they seemed to pay no mind to the scattered students that surrounded us, trying to study, getting annoyed. In an effort to calm things down, you quietly ask “Who are you talking about?”

But you already had a fairly decent idea of who they were mocking.

“That Michael guy”

You frown and nod dismissively. Suddenly, your clothes were all the wrong fabric, with all the wrong texture. Shifting in your seat, trying to breathe in and out, in and out. People have called you those names your entire life, especially when you were younger. Just because you were starting to get the hang of social interaction at college, starting to be pretty, knowing how to take care of yourself, that did not erase everything that had happened to you.

You had only seen Michael twice before. He was quite handsome, and sure, he seemed weird. But as far as you knew, he had no friends, no money, and Oliver had ditched him for Felix a long time ago. That made you more similar to him than to anyone sitting across from you.

Still fearing being alienated and left alone and far away from home, even if it meant being away from vapid people who were there by pure chance and lineage, a strange comment that should’ve been a legitimate defense left your mouth

“Actually, I think he’s super hot.”

Your comment was the match that lit up the entire conversation again. A loud laughter came out in sync.

“Do you have some kind of freak fetish or something?”

Sighing and laughing along, you decided to dismissively collect your defeat and let the situation go. Embarrassed, and with your cheek burning. What else could you do?

────────

You were right. The grass felt humid, and the dirt was rich and aromatic. You quickly stumbled your way into the house, not wanting to ruin the pretty scenery with your puke. Desperation pounded your heart, and all you needed was a break. Somewhere to puke and rest for a while. Things went south at some point in the night. The evening turned from excitement for being invited to feel stupid for letting yourself get wrapped around stupid games and ending up drunk, and it had ended with you feeling irreparably lonely, because you really had no one to hold your hair while you got better, no one to talk and share a moment in the midst of all the rapid colored madness of Halloween.

You missed your small town, you missed your old friends, you missed being at home, at peace.

An open door finally turned to be a bathroom, and without thought, you ran to open the lit of the toilet and sober up.

“I was here before”

It startled you. That voice. Angry and petty, and completely unaware that you obviously needed to use the restroom with urgency. You turned to the person, who was hiding behind the curtain of the bathtub. You opened them, reinvigorated and with a new clear head. What the actual fuck? It was Michael.

He was wearing an awkwardly thick sweater, crimson red and a yellow collar. Michael was wearing his glasses, and when he saw you standing up before him, his eyes immediately trailed down towards your exposed breasts, your stomach, and your legs. You frowned. It was a party, and now he was making you feel conscious for choosing an appropriately revealing outfit. It wasn’t your fault if he was dressed like he was on his way to attend a lecture.

“Jesus, you really are a fucking asshole aren’t you?”

A smirk adorned his face, as he spat back “But you are into that, right? Freaks?”

Your heart dropped. He had heard the conversation at the library. You suddenly did not feel so confrontational. Embarrassed and slightly annoyed, you dropped your back against the wall and slowly sat on the floor.

“What are you doing here anyway?”

His body crisped, and his cocky was nowhere to be found. “It’s not like it was invite only”

Michael was being pathetically defensive about the topic, while you were only trying to make small talk. But you let it pass, because after what he had heard, he clearly thought you were making fun of him. As if you’d police who gets inside a party on a house whose host you didn’t even know.

“That’s not what I meant. Sorry.”

The awkward silence continued. And the angry look on his face did not disappear with your attempts to make amends. You tried again.

“You are not having fun?”

He slowly shakes his head no and lowers his gaze. Something had clearly happened to this guy. And by the way everyone talked about him, you weren’t surprised.

“Yeah, me neither”

Michael seems to relax a bit, finally dropping the defense. He quickly gets up from the bathtub and walks towards the sink.

“Clean your mouth. Or it’ll stink”.

You laugh at his abruptness, but he was right. You do as he says, and when you lower down to drink some water from the sink, he shakily takes your hair for you to not get it wet. This consideration makes your heart drop yet again, because that was exactly what you needed, some nice gesture, and it had surprisingly come from him, even after you did not have the courage of the wit to defend him. A small smile lights up your face and while you turn to face him, you make sure to leave a quick kiss on his cheek.

“Thank you, I needed that”

The brownish red you were wearing stained his face, which seemed to match with the new brightness of his gaze, and the pink blush that marked his face.

“I really wasn’t making fun of you back there. I meant what I say”.

You gave him your name, and he finally properly introduced himself to you. You both smiled at one another. For the first time since you’d been together in the bathroom, he seemed truly comfortable. You weren’t one of those vapid cunts after all. And he wasn’t one either. 

────────

[sheinsidemymindvro]

Are you a system orr??/nm—A/R

hey hi, I don't have a mental disorder such as those, I am in fact a victim of a psychic attack. Psychics and people with esp are real. its not some conspiracy theory. I wasn't aware this shit existed until I followed elusin on ig. She has been abusing me for a year now with her friends, and well I cant make this shit up, she wants to steal and copy my music cause she thinks I'm swag, and turns out she's a total loser lol. here to spread the news I learnt and expose her. they let me know information because they thought I wouldn't talk about it but I don't care - such as their identities, this shit fucked me up I wouldn't believe it either. I thought I had witches fucking with me or something but no its just a group of retarded psychics. they are born this way and I guess psychics have always been around. They can go into your mind by simply imagining your face, that's it. its intuitive to them. they told me they have been doing psychic attacks since they were in elementary. this has made them into narcissistic psychos who think they are gods, but actually just idiots. they telepathically communicate. sounds like your own voice in your head if they wanna mimic you, or it could be any voice that you have memorised such as a recent person you just heard speak. from my understanding they can mildly control electric currents hence being able to make my muscles twitch and contract. Elusin out of all people is obsessed with making me constipated because after a full year of fucking with me, she has nothing else she can do to me. She can contract my inner muscles to block my intestines. Im ok tho just gotta wait a little longer. she legit lives to watch me shit, she's actually a weird bitch.

she is pathetic and just focuses on watching me, I'm a producer and new artist yet to make my first song (in the process) and she has to stay awake at every moment I am because she needs to witness how I make music, idk why my music is so special to her but she wants to steal it, its funny the idiot let me know she wants to steal my art and I'm like ok so what if I post demo's of my song, now what? its out there with dates and prof that its mine. I have stayed up for 36 hours and she stayed up too because she is that obsessed with watching my creative process. its weird.

[spencermyangel]

Can you do one where Morgan brings Reid to Chicago and they run into some of Morgan's old jock friends and Morgan is embarrassed to be friends with Spencer in front of his old high school friends.

CW - bullying, CSA implication and mention, Ableism. R slur

Having cases in his hometown was always bittersweet for Morgan. On one hand the city held a lot of painful memories and people he had distanced himself from long ago. But, on the other hand his family lived there and Chicago also brought reminders of happy times with them. 

It was one such case when he, along with Spencer were walking down the street to the alley where a murder had taken place, when he ran into some of those people. 

“Hey, Derek, is that you!” 

Morgan turned at the familiar voice, his jaw tensing when he saw two friends from highschool. Michael Brock and Denzel Acree. 

“It is,” Denzel said as he and Micheal approached, “we haven’t seen you in forever, man.” 

“Yeah, Sorry about that,” Morgan tried to hide his grimace, his eyes darting to Spencer who was observing something. “Things get busy, you know?” 

“Yeah, of course. It’s nice running into you though. Heard you’re in the FBI now, that’s insane,” Micheal chuckled, shaking his head, his blond hair swaying along with the motion. 

“Yep, I’m actually here on a case.” Morgan felt his heart speed up and his hands clench as he noticed Spencer making his way back over. 

His eyes glanced back over to the two men he had tried so hard to impress in school. And, even though he was a grown man now and knew better, he felt that familiar weight made on his chest.  What would they think of him, being friends with someone like Spencer?

Guilt plagued him the moment he thought that. Spencer was his little brother, he was a genius, he was amazing and talented. But, he was odd and quirky. Quirks Morgan had grown to love, but that could be off putting to judgemental strangers. 

Spencer was having a day when he was a little overstimulated, and therefore appeared more autistic than usual. What would Denzel and Micheal think? 

Spencer walked over, hands softly swaying at his sides as he hummed. He opened his mouth to speak, but only a squeak came out. He blushed in embarrassment and frustration, annoyed he was still non-verbal from early in the day when he got overwhelmed. He was lifting his hands to sign when a voice stopped him. 

“Is he like… a witness?” 

Morgan gulped, glancing at Spencer, “uh, no. He’s a member of my team at the FBI.” 

Denzel scoffed, “seriously? They really just hire anyone now, huh?” 

Morgan stuttered, not knowing what to say or do. Why did he feel like this? frozen? 

“Too bad you got stuck with a retard on your team,” Micheal shook his head, “reminds me of when I got paired with Bennett for that school project. Well, we’ll let you get back to work. It was nice seeing you.”

Then words that Morgan would soon regret left his mouth, “Of course, you too.” 

When the two men turned the corner, Morgan turned to see Spencer. He was looking down, pure hurt shining in his eyes with his arms hanging limply at his side. 

Morgan walked over hesitantly, “Reid…”

“Why didn’t you say anything?” Spencer softly asked, having seemingly regained his ability to speak. 

“I don’t know… I didn’t know what to say,” Morgan muttered, not meeting Spencer’s eyes in shame. 

Spencer slowly nodded, hurt still written on his face, “who’s Bennett?” 

Morgan froze, panic building in him. He was supposed to have left that part of his life in high school, “he just was some kid in our grade.”

Spencer shook his head, “you don’t get that look on your face over a random person.” 

Morgan sighed and took a deep breath, “Bennett was a kid in my class, he was autistic. We weren’t the nicest to him.” 

Spencer’s eyes widened, “What did you do?” he whispered

Morgan grimaced and braced himself for Spencer’s reaction, “we made fun of him. We would… clap next to his ears to overwhelm him,” his voice got quieter and quieter as he went on, “One time we… we asked him to hang out after school, only to jump him when he got there.” 

Morgan hated the version of himself he was in high school, an angry teen who took his problems out on innocent people around him. He remembered how excited Bennett was when they asked him to hang out, his hand flapping as he rapidly nodded. He remembered the next day when he didn’t show up for school and how over the next few days, he found out Bennett had transferred schools. 

He was snapped out of his flashback by Spencer’s wide eyes studying him in horror, desperately searching for a sign this wasn’t true. That Morgan was playing some sick joke on him. 

“Why?” was all Spencer said. 

Morgan blinked back tears and cleared his throat, “I was in a lot of pain, with what was happening.”

Spencer shook his head, “I was in pain too, I didn’t beat people up. That’s not an excuse.”

“I know,” Morgan nodded, “I was an incredibly angry teen and I shouldn’t have taken it out on people around me. It’s something I have worked on in therapy… I wish I could apologize to Bennett. Show him how much I’ve grown and tell him he didn’t deserve what we did to him.”

“I’m sure Garcia could track him down,” Spencer responded, shocking Morgan. 

“Do you think… you could help me with what I should do?” Morgan asked, a humble and genuine expression on his face. 

Spencer smiled, glad this was the man that angry teen had turned into, “I’d love too.”

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[the80srewinders]

What the fuck is wrong with your cyber dependent ass. Why the fuck do you hate people who go offline for five minutes. Oh, yeah, because you're too retarded and crippled to have a life outside of the Internet you worthless fuck. Real people with real trauma don't spend that much time online you dumbfuck. Real people with real trauma have real jobs and therapy, shit you don't have or else your pussy ass wouldn't throw around sui threats. Your Internet addicted trauma-free weak ass and zoomer screen zombies like your poser ass are why we have so many fucking toxic DID communities, and fucking frankly, why we have only DID communities because you fake ass fucks are fascinated by DID. I've already called out your fake pussy ass for faking CSA, your last post just gave me another tool in exposing your faker poser ass. I mean, we all know you're faking trauma and DID because you admitted yourself you ain't got shit that the "valid survivors" do and that's your fucking words not mine. Instead of chronic pain, chronic fatigue or chronic illness, your weak pussy ass ended up chronically online and we all know chronically online people don't have shit wrong with them physically and you can fucking bet they never had trauma a day in their lives. People who use the Internet too much like you are toxic ass bimbos. I hope your iPad gets taken away so you can finally go out into the real world, touch some fucking grass and for God's sake, get raped while you're at it. Then you'll know the pain us real trauma survivors deal with.

poor attempt at tryna be "gangsta" 😹

first off i wouldn't be cyber dependent or wtv if we had people irl who supported us besides therapists, you don't know the situation you're just jumping to conclusions because you're a bigot

i don't hate people who go offline. I hate people who hate technology, hate the Internet, etc. and I hate people who are dumb like u n generalize the Internet as a whole as bad when it's not, it's js trolls like u on social media that make ppl think dat

besides resources on the Internet saved our life at our most low points, ofc wed defend technology especially Internet, how fkn ableist can u b

thanks, I already knew that and yk what? I can fucking kms if it would make u feel better bc I've hated myself for those reasons years before i was allowed on the internet 😘

first off... do u even hv real trauma? sure doesn't sound like it from the asks u been sendin atp or else you'd know us trauma survivors flock online bc it's a dangerous thing to talk ab irl. for reasons I shouldn't hv to state if ur a real trauma survivor. which I doubt u r 😹

your ask about me faking CSA because I wasn't hypermobile is a line of shi. ain't no1 out there who's rly been sa'd gon believe that or u.

uh bish how the fuck do u know wat I do and don't? for your fuckin information I hv been in therapy for DID treatment since dx in Nov 2022. n js bc I can't get legally employed doesn't mean I don't do shi for ppl that the body is able to do, which ain't much but it's smt like u js be tryna judge my life and what u think I do atp

also ik wtf i said.

I ain't fascinated by DID bitch I wish I didn't live w it. if u actually read any of my posts on our personal experiences you'd know how much I hate it. but mk, that doesn't fit wit ur narrative so u had to gloss over dat n move on

haha u contradict urself here. "chronically online people don't have anything wrong with them physically" bitchhh do u hear urself how u sound. first u were goin off on me bc I was too "crippled" which is an ableist slur for a physically disabled person now ur sayin I ain't got shi wrong w me. damnnn you js hate chronically online ppl atp like wtf is ur problem. being online literally every hour ur awake isn't healthy n I don't stand for dat but I also don't do dat either 😘 I'm online a lot and never go outside unless it's to go out in public but I do hella offline indoor activities too, bc yk that's a thing

i know imma bimbo, ur js jealous bc u don't have a sex life 😘 maybe if you stopped touching grass youd hv a sex life too

i already said this before n I ain't gon say it again i neva had an ipad. also thanks for telling me to get raped, i actually hv hundreds of times n as much as dat sounds like a stretch or made up, I can assure u 100% it's true n my fkn body is messed up from being raped so many fkn times. I've been raped again this yr and u don't know how many times I get sa'd by family members. u ain't no real trauma survivor or else u wouldn't wish dis on som1. fuck you bish.

[iwonderwh0]

Connor’s rig guide

Okay, in the first part I talked about some basics of manipulating objects in Blender, now it’s time to look at them again within the context of Connor’s rig.

Note: I just realised there were a minor mistake in a rig. Fixed in ver. 2.2 (same link)

Click on Main_Rig object (from outliner or directly from clicking on it in the working area), check that nothing else is selected and go to the pose mode. Here you’ll be able to finally pose the character. You can move and rotate bones around just the way you would do any other objects in blender. 

Tagging you, my dear rig-testets, here: @middleofnothing @detroitbecomeonline

How to reset position/rotation/scale

Let’s say you moved it in some ugly way and want to reset it back the way it was in its “default” position. For this you need to select the bones you want to reset (or just select everything with A) and press

Alt + G - to reset position

Alt + R - to reset rotation

Alt + S - to reset scale (although I don’t know why would you scale bones)

Bone Layers

For this specific model I used bone layers to separate bones into groups according to their purpose and/or layout. What it means is that rig is divided into a few categories that can be hidden/revealed for convenience.

Blender has a system of built-in layers for armature (32 of them in total), which looks like this

I marked “actual layers” with green, because those are the layers we actually use and so-called “pointlessly repeated layers” jare ust a mirror of those we have above for the purpose of locking them (to restrict any changes we could accidentally make), which if you ask me is fucking retarded, there are better ways to visually represent it 

Anyways, we can reveal what’s inside them by clicking on them (just ignore what’s in a purple box, pretend it doesn’t exist), we can select multiple of them by holding Sift or deselect by clicking on them again (while holding shift). White circles represent that the layer has something inside and isn’t empty. Filled white circle indicate that the active bone(s) (the one(s) we have selected atm) are inside this layer, or, if nothing is selected it means that the last time there were, it was on This layer.

As you can see, by default those layers look weird and there’s no way to name them, which kinda ruins the purpose of layers. That’s why we won’t use them, and instead use free plugin “Bone Manager”, if you have my blend file, you should have it working already and it looks like this:

You can already see right away how much more user-friendly it is, doesn’t even requires explanation, as you can see all you need to know intuitively. It’s basically all the same layers from before, but displayed like they were actually made for people. 

To see this window, you should be inside pose mode. From there you can find it in the left corner of the working area under the tab “Bone Layers” like you can see on the screenshot. If you don't see that, then hover your cursor above working area and click N on your keyboard to show/hide it (or find this small arrow and click on it)

In regards to this specific rig I used 19 layers in total, you can see all of them below. They were mostly made for my convenience while rigging although I tried to rearrange them in a way that would be convenient for posing

(you can rearrange them if you want, it doesn’t affect the way any of those bones function, it’s purely for visual representation)

About those layers in detail

“Face original controls” - as the name says, it’s face bones from original rig. Not all of them though, I put “Tongue”, “Lips Upper (orig)”, “Lips Lower (orig)” and “Eyelids_orig” on separate layers, although they are all technically just face original controls. You’ll probably struggle to see them if you try to switch to them now, but it’s because bones are displayed as barely visible wires atm, I’ll explain how to switch it to other types below. 

Other layers that contain original controls are

“Helper Deform (orig)” - those move small parts of the mesh, but I don’t think they’re really useful or helpful, more like confusing and messy. You can try tweaking them around, but I suggest to ignore this layer. This layer exists because I was afraid to delete something just to find out it was actually really important later on. Maybe those bones Are helpful, idk, try it.

"Tie”, “Jacket” and “Shirt” are also just original bones that are responsible for cloth. For now I don’t yet possess the kind of black magic wisdom it takes to know how to rig clothes in a meaningful way, so it’ll probably be a frustrating experience to try to manipulate those. 

“Some pointless garbage” - originals bones that were there, but doesn’t do shit. Ignore it.

“Face custom controls” - a set of controllers made by me in an attempt to make usable face rig. It’s not comprehensive and only have controllers for eyes, eyelids and eyebrows (I got frustrated about the state of the mouth and haven’t finished it. Eyes and eyelids requires improvements too, but huh, better than moving each individual bone from original rig, which btw you can still do instead of/in addition to using controllers) This layer looks like that:

For eye individual controllers you’d want to rotate them instead of moving (double-click R after selecting them to rotate freely)

I realise now that eyelids move a little too much along with the eyes. I didn’t know the shit I was doing when I started this mess, so I’d probably managed to do it better now if I were to do it again.

Eyelid(s) controls:

You’d think that they’re responsible for upper eyelids, but actually no, not exactly, instead they are linked to the action of closing/opening the eyes and as you can see, lower eyelid moves along slightly (just like it does in the game. I tried to replicate the way it happens)

I tried to do the lover eyelid controller at some point as well to allow for the squinting(there are also wrinkle maps for that), but it is one of those things I haven’t yet done after realising that it is easy enough to break those eyelids already as they are now...Maybe later

And finally, eyebrows, which are probably the most interesting and complicated piece of this rig as they’re the only controllers that I managed to actually link to dynamic wrinkle textures, the ones I can’t shut up about. Each of those controllers are, just like eyelids, linked to the action (frowning/rising eyebrows depending on if you move them up/down or left/right from the nose. Or you can actually do both and see in-betweens of all kind of mix of the two), you can see it more clearly as skin around the corners of the eyes moves slightly(up) as well when frowned. I can dedicate the whole other post explaining exactly how I managed to do that, there’s A LOT to say, it’s absolutely ridiculous how complex it is under the hood. I spent maybe a week researching dynamic-wrinkle concept in 3d and I still can’t wrap my head around how cool it is.

Okay, that’s all for the face. 

But before moving on, a few words about what I have already mentioned about how you can use original controls to achieve more/other face expressions and actually pose mouth that I completely abandoned for custom controls.

If you switch to one of those layers with orig. controls, you’ll see something like this:

You can see those tiny dots that indicate those controls, but maybe they’re too small to be seen easily.

For this reason, you can switch the way they look to something else, instead of wire, you can do it here (generally you’ll use Stick or Octahedral if not Wire, ignore others)

Below is an example of how it looks like when displayed as Stick. I added a custom bone for the jaw just so it’d visible at all times, so it won’t be affected.

Okay, moving on to those next layers 

Now finally about how we can move the body. For this purpose there are two different ways to bend those arms/legs and those are known as Forward Kinematics (often shortened to FK) and Inverse Kinematics (IK).

In this rig there are separate layers for them called

“FK CTRL” and “IK CTRL” , for forward and inverse kinematics accordingly.

Forward Kinematics is when you pose bones one after another in a rigid way. From bottom to the top. In this rig they are color coded with green.

Note: a little update made to the rig after those gifs were made — now finger bones are in the FK CTRL layer. Used to be on DEF layer before

Inverse Kinematic (IK) is the other way around - you move the last element of a chain and all the bones before that move accordingly. You can further adjust the position of the chain by using “pole target” (in the gif below you can see how it works. It help you rotate elbow or knee) I made IK controls yellow.

This rig is switched to IK by default, so if you try to move green bones of arms or legs it won’t move. I’ll explain fow to switch between IK/FK in a moment.

“Root“ layer contains two shapes. One of which is the circle around where the character stands on the ground - if you move that it’ll move the whole character

Another shape is the words “Some settings” above the head. If you click on those and go into item properties menu, you’ll see that there are a buch of switches there:

Eyes_Follow_Head - whether or not eyes move along with the head if you rotate it or stay focused on eye controller.

FK>IK_Hand_L - switch left hand from FK(if set to 0) to IK (if set to 1)

All the remaining ones are just the same, but for the remaining hand and legs.

Layer “Torso” is quite self-explanatory. Just move/rotate things around to understand what they’re doing and you’re good to go.

And...It seems like I’m forgetting something really important as if there’s a lot more to tell about, but HUH. I don’t remember what is it exactly and if I figure it out, I’ll update this post.

Oh, right, about other layers. Those are mechanical layers responsible for things to function properly and those layers aren’t intended to be touched so if you don’t know what you’re doing DO NOT TOUCH OR CHANGE ANYTHING in those layers. Which are “Eyelids”, “Follow-Eyelid”, “DEF”(this one contain original bones btw, but don’t touch it if you're tot sure), “MCH” and “IK”

Lemme know if you have any problems/questions/suggestions/fic recommendations or if you want me to ramble on about some specific thing in rigging(or 3d in general), like the way I made those controls for eyebrows, or how to create your own controllers. Or...you got the idea.

And if you use this rig for your renders, mention where did you get it from (I wonder who that could be about?) ;^)

[adultswim2021]

Lowe Country | May 11, 2007 | Webisode/Special

Yes! I’m writing-up Lowe Country! Why?

In addition to the five airing programs that were part of “The Night of 1000 Pilots” there was also this. Lowe Country is a fairly simple idea: A proposed docuseries about various days in the life of Space Ghost voice-actor George Lowe. Just follow George around with cameras and let him be him. We see him have some sort of physical training session, get annoyed in traffic, record some lines as Space Ghost for, I’m guessing, the Volume Two DVD (he states the date is 5/12/04). I genuinely wonder what these recordings are actually used for. Was there a music replacement that required replacement dialogue recordings? Was it actually for a promo or something that I missed? I wonder!

One memorable moment is when George visits a radio station and does his “Wilbur the Love Goat” routine with a couple of receptionists. It’s basically sexual harassment, but they take it in stride and I hope and pray that George doesn’t get #metoo’d. He should maybe make it up to them in some small way if he hasn’t already. Maybe he should give them a nice present? Perhaps a real goat named “Wilbur the Love Goat”? Hahaha, I am making myself laugh so hard right now. You sexually harass women for years and then you make it up to them by bringing them an animal that they have to take care of and somehow share custody of. How can I get this idea to George? The two women call George retarded, which caused me to theorize that if we just let women say the r-slur (the one from before that I didn’t censor; not sure why I did just now) and no one else then that would fix all this stuff.

My friend from 7th grade has “we’re all out for a peanut” as his twitter username, and it’s from this! COOL!

This pilot was unique in that it only ever aired in it’s unedited form as a web-only exclusive. Later it was recreated using a CGI Space Ghost in place of George; I don’t remember if the other people in the video were also CGI’d or not. I don’t think they were? They titled it “Earth Ghost” and it aired later as part of either an April Fools or Daylight Savings stunt. I’m sorry I never go through the trouble of looking up which one it is when I say that. They are basically the same to me.

I do like this, and would hella support an actual series of this. But I don’t feel like I need too many more of these. George Lowe is a treasure and he should just get a salary to be himself weather cameras are rolling or not. You gotta admit I’m right about this.

Okay! Since we’re here, we might as well rank not just the “Night of 1000″ pilots, but also every other pilot Adult Swim ever produced up to this point. I’m going to include Lucy, The Daughter of the Devil, even though it’s eventually going to be a series. Also let’s throw Anime Talk Show in there, why not? Let me know if I forgot something. Please! From worst to best:

The Groovenians

The Finkel Files

The Lewis Lectures

That Crook'd 'Sipp

Captain Sturdy: The Originals

Penguins Behind Bars

Lucy, The Daughter of the Devil

Anime Talk Show

Saddle Rash

The Drinky Crow Show

Spacecataz

Fat Guy Stuck in Internet

Lowe Country

Let's Fish

Welcome to Eltingville

Korgoth of Barbaria

Superjail

[nightguide]

AESTHETIC RETENTION: SHIT PEOPLE GO THERE

MILITARY TACTICS

CONVERSATION OF MASS (HOW FUCKING RETARDED YOU ARE): YOU DID NOT LIKE THE DRESS. FIRST. A' OOZU BILAAH

CONVERSATION OF LENGTH (DID YOU JUST MAKE A HICK DO IT FOR YOU?): I HATE YOU

CONVERSATION OF NUMBER (HOW MUCH NAZAR EARNED FOR THAT ONE SINGLE BACKSIDED THOUGHT YOUR MOM HAD ABOUT YOU FORGETTING IT): THAT DAY, YOUR DAD THOUGHT YOU WERE A LIL TOO 'SEXY' FOR HIS OWN GOOD

WHY DID YOU MOM MAKE YOU GO?

CULT (FUCK YOU BACK): THIS IS YOUR NAME TO BE THERE, DID YOU EAT ENOUGH PUSSY FOR THAT ONE 'TIGHT SHIP' TO LAST AGES? (IN BRITISH)

SECT (DICKHEAD): I DID NOT GO TO THE TOILET ALL THE WAY BUT I MIGHT HAVE PISSED ON THE DRESS TO MAKE YOU PAY FOR IT

CHURCH (YOUR AUNTY LIKES YOUR CL*T): YOU WANT TO FUCK 'HER' DONT YOU?

MASJID PHYSICS

METAPHYSICS (YOUR BESTIE HATES U TO APPEAL HER 'QUR'AN' TO HER LIKE UR BESTIE IS NOT HERE, LIKE SOME WINTOUR NIGGA U THINK U ARE): SABRINA DOES NOT FCKIN CARE ABOUT WINTOUR, LIKE SHE WOULD RUN HER OVER IN A CHANCE THAT SHE WOULD FIND THAT 'NIGGA' LIKE SHE BEEN WANTING THE N WORD PASS SINCE GIRL MEETS WORLD OR WHATEVER DISNEY ER TV SHOW SHE BEEN ON AT 8YO AND PUBLICLY PORNOGRAPHISED LIKE HER ENTIRE RANT THERE WAS LIKE SHE WAS NOT EVEN GONNA MENTION THE ROYAL 'W' WORD TO OUTFUCK MAMMA NIGGA AT THE RIGHT (HER 'BAJI') IS A HOE AND THATS IT

EPISTEMOLOGY (THAT GUY AT THE BACK SHE MAKES FUN OF BUT EVENTUALLY GETS CALLED OUT FOR IT): SHE DOES NOT LIKE HOW SHE CREATES THAT 'FEELING' BUT ALWAYS THE FIRST NIGGA TO SNORT OUT LAUGHING THAT GETS HER THE SLAP BISECTIONALLY (MEANING ITS NOT HER BUT SHE HOLDS UP THE AWARDS SHOW FOR 'THAT WILL SMITH TIMING' SHE LEAVES EVEN WILL SMITH TO THINK ABOUT THAT GIRL AT THE BACK TAKING THE 'MICHAEL' OUT OF HIM)

ETHICS (HER FUCKING HISTORY AT MASJID ACCORDING TO THAT ONE TRUSTED SPANISH FRIEND (BASICALLY THAT FRIEND U ALWAYS SEE WHO GREW WITH YOU EMOTIONALLY AT WEDDINGS): SABRINA DOES NOT LIE. THATS THE FCKIN WORD THAT SHE SAYS AN SHE LIKES GET THE PEN THROWN AT HER LIKE THAT TYPA BITCH, SHE THE ONE WHO CALLS OUT AUNTY (WINTOUR) FOR THE SAME FCKIN LINE SHE ALWAYS USES THAT ACTUALLY MADE THE ENTIRE CLASS ROAR IN LAUGHTER, LIKE MASTER-CLOWn ENERGY TIL SHE GETS THE HARD R BY EXISTING. THATS JUST IT

NATURE OF HUMANS (EVERYDAY OF HER LIFE IS 'HER' AN SHE CALLS THAT 'DAJJAL'): AUNTY IS IN LOVE WITH HER FCKIN CLIT

HUMAN PROBLEMS (I HATED THAT WHORE FOR NOTHING (AND ITS LIKE THE WORLD ENDED FOR THAT GUJURATI (ASSHO) FOR RUINING HER LIFE (NO FAMILY BONDING OUT OF FAMILIAR LUCK CUZ THAT HO RUINED HER LIFE AN IT'S THEIR FAULT FOR NOT 'REASONING WITH THE EARLIER OPTIONS BETTER'): SHE HATED WINTOURS GUTS. SHE IS THAT GUJURAT. PERHAPS HER MOM WOULD HAVE BEEN JAMIE-LEE CURTIS AN HER LIFE WOULD HAVE BEEN BETTER RUN OVER BY THAT LAND ASS BITCH OF A WHEL SHE THINKS SHE IS, GTFO

ANSWER TO HUMAN PROBLEMS (DIS BITCH??? *THE FCK FACE ON THAT PERMANENTLY*): SABRINA REALLY HATED LIFE MORE THAN ANYONE THAT SHE GOT HERSELF KICKED OUT OF DISNEY BY MAKING WINTOUR LIVE 'THAT DAJJAL'S LIFE' ALONE. STICK THAT BITCH NEXT TO HER AN WATCH HER FAKE ASS MELT LIKE BARBIE IN A MICROWAVE

HISTORY ('IF I SEE HER' IMAGINATION 20 YEARS LATER ENERGY): *SHUT THE FUCK UP* LIKE BONES EVERYWHERE (IN. GLEE.)

DEATH (SUBHAN ALLAH, IM AT PEACE): SHE IS RICH AN SHE IS DED

VIEW OF RELIGION (HER PARENTS NOW THAT THEY KNOW WHO SHE KNOWS BUT HATES BEING THERE 'FOR HER' AND ARE REGRETTING HER SOONER): HER PARENTS ARE INTO HER BY NOW

[spacefrog1984]

https://www.specialolympics.org/stories/impact/why-the-r-word-is-the-r-slur

This is a source discussing the r word, and how it has been used as a slur (specifically coming up in posts about disabled people) and it was still the accepted medical term quite recently (2010). I don't think this make sai a horrible person but dismissing because some else is worse is how communities can become toxic to disabled people.

(for the record I dislike sai for her treatment of it/it's users being kinda transphobic but I doubt have screenshots from that rn)

I don't dismiss criticisms of Sai because she's a saint in comparison to Lily Orchard. Check out some of Sai's blogs (main: @saiscribbles, drama-side-blog: @purpledemonlilyposting) - read for yourself to see if she's as toxic to disabled people as you've heard. As far as I know, she has never directed the word "retarded" at a person of reduced mental faculties. I understand that the very use of the word can be offensive to some, but I think context matters here when determining if someone is "toxic" or the community that they foster is "toxic" to any group.

Also, keep in mind that just because a medical term is in the DSM doesn't mean that it's still being used by clinicians. "Mentally retarded" may have only officially lost its clinical status in the last two decades, but it's been out of use for much longer in the US and elsewhere. Perhaps that's what's behind the hang-ups people have here: "idot", "moron", and "imbecile" have been out of use longer than "retarded", their association with mentally handicapped people have fallen out of public awareness long ago, but "retarded" is still on peoples' minds. I think the longer we go about insisting "retarded" is a slur, the longer it will take for the word to lose any connection to the mentally handicapped and become just another insult to be lodged against a person acting like an idot.

I have my own issues with "it/its" being used as a preferred pronoun, and while yes, I agree with Sai that it's kind of silly and a cry for attention, I've also recently become aware of why "it" irked me so much - it has to do with the appropriation of the pain of actual dehumanized people like slaves and genocide victims. I'm not going to be taking to the streets any time soon demanding people stop using "it/its" for there pronouns, but I don't respect the use of these pronouns because (A) they're kinda silly, and more importantly (B) they're insensitive. However, note that none of my reasoning is based on transphobia, nor is Sai's reasons for finding "it" to be a cry for attention based on transphobia. People can have differences of opinion and not fall into a category of toxic and harmful people based solely on a single issue. I'm a fervent supporter of transgender, nonbinary, and gender-nonconforming people, but that doesn't mean I have to agree with was some of these or other people consider an appropriate pronoun for a human being.

[the-firebird69]

This guy is a piece of crap this Trump guy it's also a big loser. The guy goes around telling her son stuff and he expects like Mercy from people or some kind of identifying with them and so the other rat saying all sorts of s*** about people today saying stuff having him catch himself up and getting himself in trouble he is a huge loser for what's going on a massive nobody and pretty soon he'll be out and bja on his tail. Now Terry cheesman who's an odd one is doing things that are really weird could not stand being number two because John r is an idiot by comparison so it's going by today is being a dick and his same s*** but really people think it's John Travolta. Tony F has the decision-making process power of who to pick we think he puts Trump into Terry cheesman's body and Trump's body at that time is that of a clone or other as it were people think that it's a vampire but we don't think so and what happened in the civil war is Cherry cheeseman was hit badly and he healed a little bit and they took a sprain out and put in Trump's and he ran as vice president and people thought he was a little sick it was really this idiot. Terry cheeseman gets out actually he's ready as president and he kills Trump and publicly and ruins the role and Tommy F takes over and Cherry cheeseman is vice President and tries going after Tommy f and the motive is that he hit his brother the president. To make it confusing enough. So what eventually happens is not what's going to happen here in reality in the civil war it was different. Here President and vice President leave office for some reason and they don't really it's covid-19 or something like that and the exit office on very sour notes they are not well liked people hate them and they don't like people for getting them fired or firing them or handing them their hat and so on so they don't look immediately to Ken but he knows how it went the last time and he's saying it's not me it really isn't it's the max plan and they figured out that they're in trouble and they're listening to people who are trying to escape them so they go around who's the most purpose and who's flinging it they find our son's playing a lot of it but it's up to them to decide and they found out the system. But that time ken is president. Supposedly make him Secretary of State because he's this constant threat cuz they're retards

Thor Freya

Olympus

[kyrodo]

Some people take their time to get to know someone, others are fucking psychotic. I don't care if someone is being extra, head canony, or digging into themselves and trying to expose whatever their worst secrets are. I don't care if they're writing incoherent essays about me. I don't care if they can't seem to leave me alone when their time is up. I will never treat anyone the same way you treated me.

It's funny how despite the fact that I was the one spied on, I still know more about you than you know about me. I didn't earn my degree in bullying yet. Does being mad in response to bullshit count?

Humans are multi-faceted creatures, and the sides we see are the ones we deserve. You ever wanted to see the side Red and Choskey sees of me you have to earn that shit. Lying to my face every possible chance you get is a shitty way of doing that. I know how stupid it was for me to play things up every time I was about to interact with you directly, but I still didn't deserve what you put me through. It's the small things that piss you off huh? You don't like when people put their anxiety on display. Enough to find out where they sleep.

I never got to show you the real side of me without the dramaticness, but you adamantly refused to use real words in the first place. You get what you deserve.

The R who doesn't care if someone is fixing their ps4 or not. You think I wasn't ticked off that you were spamming the impatient Gengar memes not a day after I told you why we couldn't play yet? I am so fucking done with you. You're the type who only cares about results. You want everything now, it can't fucking wait. I reminded Red every single day that I wanted him to do the repair when we got home from work and getting him to do anything with his adhd is a pain. He would always go off to watch YouTube or play mobile games, do chores or go to bed day in day out weekend or not no matter how many times I pushed him. But no you don't fucking care. You always assume I'm holding out on you or some shit, because the whole world revolves around you. The fact that that is what escalated into the hacking is some of the saddest shit I've ever seen. You're so unbelievably fucking stupid.

You hacked me, you could see through my Fucking webcam, you could even hear Red, and you still had the nerve to say it was all a lie, you total fucking retard. Your capacity for denial is fucking rich. Oh look I could have bought it online and I ended up doing that, whoopdee doo. On my sister's ps4 that I never used on a personal level before it was broken and lent to me. I had an inkling it had something like the Nintendo store but I didn't know for sure. I can infer infer infer I didn't try. I didn't even look it up. I just wanted the repair done first before doing anything else with it and then things started going sour before I had the chance to. But you can't wait on shit, so much so that you'll hurt someone if they don't fucking play with you.

I had my anxieties about you, I take time to try new things. I am not a handyman, Red is the one who does all the repairs here. Red is the one who built my pc. I can only do so much to push him into doing anything, half the time we can't even go out the door to do a walk because he stalls with YouTube videos until it's too late to go out for anything. But you're the one who can't fucking wait. You, the one who can't speak a single word in straight fucking English. And the funny thing is, if you wanted context then you literally could have just fucking listened to me, because I could have sworn I went over that before you hacked me, in your dms. To you everything is a lie, even WHEN you see it in person. Dude wake the fuck up.

When will you ever fucking learn that what I have to say actually matters. I don't speak out of my fucking nose like you do. If you always have to see something I say to believe it there's no chance in hell we will ever get along. I don't know if you noticed but whether or not I'm picking out memories that are relevant to you, I seem to be pretty fucking consistent as far as what I say, even when I am defensive. But you had to go that far to figure it out huh? I don't live in a world surrounded by lies, because that's not my fucking territory. I ain't touching yours. I resorted to poetry in response to your subtext, because then I can exaggerate or make metaphorical references to things instead of taking a huge dump on the English language just to say you're going to 7 11 or some shit. I don't know why I ever took interest in you. I don't know why I got obsessed with you, but I guess I'd have to be pretty fucking desperate.

You want excessive discreetness, you found the wrong guy. I questioned it a lot, and that's why I kept making those passive aggressive stabs in the dark cause, i was confused. It doesn't make any fucking sense. There is no reason to go that far to cover up everything we say if we're just trying to be friends. And in respect to Red, you think meeting him or getting to know each other is not important for a poly? What the actual fuck were you even going for? That's why I likened you to a cult or satanist etc cause it honestly felt like a hazing. It felt like I was going through some kind of test for something I just happened to be doing the procedure for by accident. Because it didn't make sense to constantly cover every last thing we say like a coded message.

Everything was so extra and pointless I honestly wondered what I was getting into.

Why is it that people can just reply to you on Twitter with no strings attached like it's an everyday thing, and I can't? That was constantly on my mind and it pissed me off. You make it such a hassle to say anything straight up without suddenly getting upset at me and lying to me that I have to pretend like I'm meeting you for the first time. And nobody else has to do that, so why did I? In an ideal world we would have just hopped on discord in a voice call and it would have solved fucking everything, but seeing as all this shit happened, mission fail.

The funny thing is, if you simply didn't play stupid games with people you would have gotten along with me just fine. Did you ever stop to think about that? If you wanted to put me in my place cause I was overly eager emotionally, you still could have done that in a setting that isn't fucking stupid. Once you saw things in context, how massive was the revelation that you don't know how to fucking trust people worth shit.

And your blatant denial instinct is such a fucking dick to work with that I seriously wish you were anyone else. Dude I just can't. Accountability, what's that? I make it look so fucking easy don't I, so why can't you? Why do you constantly feel like you have to cover up every fucking thing you say. Why do you always avoid strict wording, why do you always magnetize towards double meanings and avoiding saying what we mean. Be vague, be open ended, be intangible at all times 24/7. It could be for you, it could be for someone else. The I mights and maybes and perhaps. I am so fucking done with you. Leaving you behind was the biggest breath of fresh air I ever had.

The world beneath my feet stopped being a sheet of thin ice made of possible outcomes and meanings that I could have gotten wrong. And I am fucking thriving. It's like having 20/20 vision. I am not only welcome in this present world but I know for sure that I am welcome. And had I gone with you instead, you would have been more than happy to leave me on continuous hold. To leave me doubting you and doubting myself. You are the very embodiment of everything you shouldn't do when you meet someone, and I thought I was bad. Imagine being someone who makes people feel good about themselves instead of leaving them with constant confusion and anxiety while simultaneously disbelieving every word anyone other than you says. You sap the very life and happiness out of people, why the fuck would I want to be with someone like you.

Being ambiguous with me is no longer acceptable. Someone is either straight with me or they are fucking gone. At least you taught me how to avoid bullshit. If I can't read on the lines with someone they are fucking gone. I am done having two conversations with the same person, especially when both conversations turn out to be fake. The moment someone tests me they've already failed mine. I am not a test subject. You either trust me or you don't and I'm not going to stick around if you can't figure it out. I am never going to deal with trash like you again. If someone can't treat me as an equal then I don't have to treat them at all.

I've proved myself on so many fucking levels now, but I am never going to subject myself to that again. I actually give a fuck about myself now and that shit doesn't fly around me.

Your are such a horrible person I can hardly believe you're even fucking real. You thought I'd be easy to shit on cause of some of the shit I used to say out loud about myself? You thought Red wasn't even a real boyfriend. You were so fucking wrong. You tried to take advantage of my depression, you are literally the worst person on the Fucking planet and I can't do shit to save you. I don't think I need your help anymore. I find it difficult to immerse myself when there is so much fucking bullshit.

All the wrong calls, all the wrong moves, all the wrong assumptions judgments and words, every fucking thing you can do wrong, you're always there. Get the fuck out of my life. Even when everything is laid bare I still play you like a fucking violin. Even when you try to use a gameshark you still lose, and it's fucking hilarious. There just isn't a single battlefield with me where you win is there? All the way down to just being a decent fucking person. You done trying to find something big to write me off for yet?

You get what you pay for bitch. Clearly I wasn't above saying things like "you owe me" or trying to get another commission/get approval from your friends to win you over, but I'm not the same bitch I was where you left me. The shit I do I can at least fucking adjust. You on the other hand, your entire personality needs a rework.

I will never be able to overstate the difference between you and me. Me looking at some shitty artwork in my downtime is the least of your concerns. The best you got for me is that I'm sus, then stay out of my fucking house.

[vrisrezis]

Hello again! I loved the fic you wrote for my last request!

I wanted to request another Cartman x reader where the 4 boys (together) find out that the reader is actually extremely smart. They were just hiding how smart they are because they didn’t want to seem like a show off like some of the girls. But they get in trouble because of their low grades and disruption of class with the boys. Thanks so much! :)

Cw for the usual cartman anti Semitic bullshit, r slur, also there’s kinda a mention of something sexual at the end bc yknow how this show is 😭

“Y/n L/n, Stan Marsh, Kyle Broflovski, Kenny McCormick, and Eric Cartman to my office immediately”

the five of you look at eachother for a moment. Kyle says “Dude what did you do?” turning to you and Cartman. You two being notorious for making complete asses of yourself in school. “Dude I didn’t do anything.” You say, “yeah sneaky Jew! I bet you did something!” “Fuck off fatass!”

“Okay guys, let’s just go and see what’s up. Maybe we’re not in trouble.” Stan reasons as Kenny agrees with Stan.

The five of you sit down in front of PC Principle. Getting in trouble with him is always a horrible idea. Something that you quickly learned from Cartman.

“I’m gonna make this quick. Y/n. Your grades suck.”

You raise a brow and the others look at you,

“Don’t their grades always suck?” Stan asked.

“Yeah, why does this concern the rest of us anyway?” Kyle butts in.

“Well, I’m gonna be honest boys. Y/n is actually a fantastic student. But I am getting reports they have been flunking lately. Because you BOYS are disruptive. You distract her. And I do not take lightly to kids not only fucking around in class, but also distracting people that could potentially be something someday.”

“Dude what? You’ve been smart this whole time?” Cartman asks, and you shrug.

“Listen PC principal.” You start, “it may be true that I’ve been kinds disruptive in class with them.. but that’s not why I’m failing! I’ve always been like this with them! I just don’t wanna be a show off like Wendy or something.”

“Wendy’s not a show off!” “Shut up Stan”

Pc principal sighs, “listen kid. Just get those motherfuckin grades up alright? You don’t have to be a show off, just do well in school and there will be no issues. Now get outta here.

As the five of you left, Kenny muffles “Dude that was so retarded” “I know. I’m sorry guys.” You sigh, “Dude whatever” Kyle says. “Yeah let’s just go back to class” Stan says and the others walk off. You’re left with cartman, and you look at him.

“Dude y/n that was so stupid for somebody that’s supposed to be smart you’re a fucking moron” “shut up fatass! You think putting butters dick in your mouth makes you straight somehow.”

[heartshapedcreaturefromcriptoon]

No but like, the idea of two blocked people and a bunch of gray faces having “discourse” about my “worsening reputation” in the Hazbin Hotel fandom is so funny to me, because like: 

Everything I know about Blair White and sh0eonhead I’ve had to learn against my will, because of this fandom.

Everything I know about  Scott Cawthon I’ve had to learn against my will, because of this fandom.

Everything I know about Brandon ‘drops the R slur every video’ Rogers I’ve had to learn against my will, because of this fandom.

Because of this fandom, I’ve had to be subjected to “Rolling Robbie”.

And if you guys think I’d buy any official Helluva Boss merch after tolerating this shit along with the R-Slur that I don’t think would have been in the pilot  if Roger’s hadn’t been hired, I don’t know what to tell you.

I still have my questions about Roger’s calibrating with Greg whatever his last name, is... Who’s actual channel name is so taboo to talk about I think it’s getting censored because it keeps disappearing every time I try to type it here? 

Vivziepop channel’s merch commercials making fun of wheelchair users again in their promos (check the last ones for Summer).  

The Amber Heard parody that Brandon did was in extremely poor taste, too. And I only bring it up because of:

Brock Baker 

Stamper

The knowledge of the staff that work on Hazbin and Helluva still eat at Chick Fil A, they’re sorry if you’re gay. They know that they’re Bad Gays TM for doing that but The Sandwiches Are So Good! TM 🥺 

The fact that I would have happily donated to the hunnicast if I wasn’t forced to just be tolerant of not only the Chick Fil A apologists, but also another ableist arsehole that isn’t Brandon LOUDLY SCREECHING “REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!” directly into my ears at the start of nearly every episode and every five minutes after.

The fact that I know some you guy’s favorite YouTubers are pewdiepie and Logan Paul.

Speaking of YouTubers: 

Anyway, case in point: I know that the Hunnicast had to remain “apolitical” because of funding reasons, but there’s absolutely no reason for the fandom itself to adopt this mentality and it’s probably half of the reason people hate the majority of you! So I don’t know why the irony of even speaking about “worsening reputations” in this fandom of all fandoms is so hopelessly lost on people but I’m just gonna leave you with this actual, real life video of Brandon Rogers appropriating my culture in order finally let it sink in just how much. A. I’m on no ones side but my own. B. I hate all of you.  C. I don’t owe abled-bodied autistics ether civility nor do I give even the slightest shit about my ‘worsening reputation’ in this fandom because I’m “rude”,  “unlikable”, and actually have enough boundaries to BLOCK PEOPLE! D. I don’t owe shit to an abled-bodied, uppity cis-woman-fandom-mom-political centrist just because she claims she’s black, especially since she basically implied how she thought I was retarded and then said “I didn’t know that nor do I care” ( because she doesn’t have enough comprehension skills to notice references to my disability in both my url and profile and I’m surprised that she didn’t try to call me racist for having “crip” in my url, too). This fandom really literally is full bigoted political centrists and I refuse to make myself palatable to them.

Me: *Making a ‘Yo Daddy’ joke about Leeanne’s parents being two caricatures from a cartoon that she’s claims isn’t racist, since she wants to act like a cartoon caricature of angry black nerd*

Leeanne, throwing her bisexuality into it even though that joke about two racist cop cartoon characters created by a white dude that she just defended wasn’t racist being her parents had absolutely nothing to do with bi sexuality: ...  Wow. This has to be the most bi-phobic, racist thing I’ve ever read in my entire life, you dug your own grave and I’m also going to type out your entire URL here even though the two shorter names you want people to call you are right there on your page but I’m not gonna use them because in my eyes you’re mentally disabled and I don’t see you as human and I don’t care if you call me ableist for disrespecting your disability ether! You dug your own grave, retard. Now lie in it!

Me, like, three years ago, the first time I saw this shitty, r-slur slinging youtuber crip-up to pretend to be one of my people and exploit us for the sake of “comedy” and money because, unfortunately, Viv gets herself into shenanigans sometimes and I just wanna know how badly this dudes shenanigans are gonna reflect on her new show now that I also have to tolerate her being involved with THIS specific kind of loser: .... Okay so working with someone who produces this shit is admittedly a new low for Viv and I hope to God that she keep you on a short creative leash and if your ableist, Elevated Andy Dick sounding arse gets recast for pulling some Problematic YouTuber TM bullshit I do not care especially since I see you’ve worked with Greg! You’ve just dug your own grave for me. Brandon Rogers, lie in it!  

You guys, if I ever posted my grievances and exact feelings regarding Brandon in the tags before now: I am so sorry but are you okay you angry little invalid? I’m legit asking because it’s a bit much. I think you need to learn to take a joke and I think you’re taking this a bit too far almost like an anti would... Do you not care about the fandoms good reputation? 

Me, before I block you: Honey listen, we’re in Hell, there is no “good reputation” or redemption, fuck off .

Abled-Bodied Mentally Ill People block evading me to call me rude and condescending and mean and harass an Actual Invalid in a world where “Rolling Robbie”  is still on Viv Medrano’s pay roll: HOW DARE YOU CALL ME HO-

*oops they’re blocked again*

[icesteelabyss]

ermmmmm last reblog lmao bc as funny as it is seeing you reply with like 0 braincells, I will bring up this:

you literally say a slur right there, and then double down on the fact that you can say it :P

You can say alllllll you want that this is just me trying to twist your words, but the evidence is right there. You quite literally use the word retard as a slur. You then double down and act like its not a big deal. You wanna know why the word retard is a slur? It's used against mentally disabled people like me, who process the world way differently than most non-mentally disabled people. But I'm not surprised you wanna act like you're so good at arguing, because reading through this? You have not, at ANY point, cited evidence for your claims. Well, here's some evidence I've pulled to show you why you quite literally cannot use the word retard the way you used it to describe (insinuate, more like) how you think I am. https://www.specialolympics.org/stories/impact/why-the-r-word-is-the-r-slur https://www.washingtonpost.com/lifestyle/kidspost/why-you-shouldnt-use-the-r-word/2011/06/06/AGISc3nH_story.html

I won't be surprised if you ignore this and laugh at my attempts to actually educate you, but you just prove my point that a mentally disabled minor is smarter than you. And on that topic? You really love to just put down the person you're 'arguing' against, but holy fuck it's just sad how that goes to show that you cannot argue anything unless your feelings are involved. I can read that stupid, smug, self-loathing tone so easily, and I struggle to understand the tone of text. Kind regards, suck my dick and balls, if you think language isnt that important go outside and yell "I love touching kids" and see how quick language fucking matters.