#So when I looked up pictures obviously I spoiled myself

[brooklynishere]

So I've just started Endwalker, but I am also a terminally online person who likes to look at fanart on tumblr and has also already watched the dawntrail trailer So of course I'm entertaining myself & my already-played-endwalker friend by going THERE'S NO NEED TO REMEMBER THIS FELLOW'S NAME I'M SURE I'LL NEVER SEE HIM AGAIN AFTER THIS QUEST

[bokutosbabe]

Call It What You Want To

(soft launching with the bllk boys)

a / n — i love soft launches and blue lock…so why not combine them?

content — fluff, cutesie stuff, bllk characters x fem! reader, pretty much gn! but i did use ‘she’ so just to be safe, + your faves if you want!!

synopsis — soft launches with the boyfies <3

✿.｡. ��� nobody’s heard from me for months , ” .｡.✿

is NEVER on social media. has accounts of course, but never posts on them. usually the most they do is repost things about soccer on their stories. so when they post these pictures as their first post EVER? it’s inevitable that their fans are going to go insane.

they preferred posting these pictures, neither of your faces showing. you’d both decided to keep your relationship “private but not secret” , if someone were to find out it was you in these photos? so be it. they would never dream of hiding you from the world.

°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･ RIN ITOSHI, barou shouei, sae itoshi, jinpachi ego

they don't have many posts, but the ones they do have no less than a million likes each. their fans are adoring, so when they post a new photo, thousands of people get the notification and within seconds the post has 200k likes.

their fans are insane, and that's putting it lightly. they find your account within a minute all by looking at your phone case and finding your account.

the both of you wake up the next morning and find yourselves not only trending on twitter, but also with thousands of edits made of the two of you. AND A SHIP NAME??

so much for a soft launch.

°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･ YUKIMIYA KENYU(im biased), shido ryusei, MICHAEL KAISER, hyoma chigiri

a chronic poster. i mean literal photo dumps GALORE. they had many fans, obviously with them being a famous soccer player, but also because of how 'real' they were. they would constantly post stories in the bathroom and ranting- all that fun stuff.

their fans had no indication that they'd been in a relationship at all. which was strange because due to their openness, their fans began thinking they deserved to know every little thing about them.

they just wanted to keep you their little secret for a little bit, so they posted these very inconspicuous photos and had the internet up in a frenzy.

soccerluver44: WHO IS THIS??

urmomshouse: no way

and thousands of comments just like that flooded their inbox.

this was fun, they thought. maybe for a little while longer they'd keep you their little secret. the thought crossed their mind as they pressed the 'your story' button, posting a photo of them sitting on the sink with your arms wrapped around them.

°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･ MEGURU BACHIRA, isagi yoichi, EITA OTOYA, oliver aiku

not a constant poster, but definitely has a social media presence. they mostly post about their upcoming games and where to get tickets and watch. they definitely don't post about their personal life, so when people log on and see a soft launch??

the world goes into a state of shock. the comments are limited, so no one besides people they follow back (most of which who already knew of the relationship) are allowed to comment.

they did this on purpose. they saw no point in having strangers question them when the caption said it all

" spoiling my girl <3 "

°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･ REO MIKAGE, tabito karasu, jyubei aryu, DON LORENZO

✿.｡. “ i'm doing better than i ever was ” .｡.✿

took myself to the computer version to do this since there's a photo limit on the mobile version.

hope yall liked it though, i've never done anything like this before!!

likes, comments, and reblogs are appreciated!!

[seenoversundown]

For Death Or Glory : Chapter Eight

Jake Kiszka x Charlotte (Fem OC)

Warnings: DRINKING / ALCOHOL (bigger warning because they are actively drinking in this one, not just in the bar) Swearing, Sex is mentioned (not had) A LOT of ridiculous puns and jokes, Slow Burn is REAL, Halloween Costumes, Brotherly Banter (gentle bullying) and finally, our favorite warning, YEARNING.

Word Count: 7k (longest so far!!)

Summary: IT'S HALLOWEEN BABES; Josh decides to decorate the bar for the holiday and so, they make it into a little party. Jake hesitates on what to do about Charlotte, but goes with his gut. And BOY IS THAT A LITTLE TREAT.

Author's Note: I said this week would be a sweet treat and I think that you'll find that it is! I don't want to spoil the surprise but, I think you'll be excited to see what it is 🤭 See you on the other side!

More Than Friends - Aidan Bissett "Girl, lets be more than friends, I know you're thinking the same thing."

Jake POV 

“You know, whatever you decide to hang up, we need to be able to get down, right?” 

I stand there watching Josh not so carefully hanging off the ladder’s top step. Quinn looks less than impressed while they stand on the bottom step.

“Maybe Jake is onto something, Josh Groban,” they tell him. 

Josh stops, looks back with a glare, and then returns to whatever he is trying to do. 

I look over at them, both of us shaking our heads, knowing that Josh will do whatever he damn well pleases. 

“He’s your problem to deal with now,” I tell them, gently squeezing their shoulders as I pass by. 

Deciding to make sure the bar is fully stocked for the night, I can’t help but eavesdrop on Sam and Willa as they try to get ‘cute post-worthy’ pictures for the bar’s Instagram. 

“Sam, can you just work with me?” Willa asks, letting out a frustrated sigh. 

“Birdie, you know this is also my job?” 

“Yeah, well, last time you took promo photos, you stole all my flowers, AND you hated the outcome. So, maybe just listen to me?” 

“I’m not trying to be difficult, little bird,” Sam says, “You just need to relax.”

“When has telling a girl to relax ever ended well for you?” 

I was chuckling to myself as I listened to them and took notes of what needed to be pulled from the back. I hate dragging myself away from the free entertainment, but I need to keep moving so the bar can be ready tonight. 

I wasn’t the one who came up with the idea to do a themed night; you can only imagine who suggested it, but people have been talking about it lately, so maybe it was a good choice. Even though I had to explain to Josh that we cannot require people to wear costumes, I think it’ll be fun to see everyone dressed up. 

Looking at the back stock and pulling out the things we’ll need, I hear footsteps approaching me. I simply glanced at the doorway to finally be met with Josh’s presence. 

“So.. are you going to invite her?” 

My eyebrows pull together a bit, “Who?”

“Your First Mate,” Josh says, wiggling his eyebrows at me. 

“Oh shut up,” I quip back, “I was thinking about it.” 

Regret has never hit me quicker. 

“OH ARE YOU NOW?”

“I mean… you saw her the other day, Josh. She’s obviously not having a great time and the fact she has to keep coming here, I may as well at least extend the offer.” I tell him, “Even if she’ll probably say no.” Quickly, I look back at my notes to make sure I’m not forgetting anything before walking back out to the bar. 

“Well, you have been talking to her,” he says. 

“We’ve texted .. a little bit,” I tell him, knowing that he will pry for more information, “BUT– it’s nothing crazy. I just wanted to make sure she was okay.” 

He follows me, offering no assistance carrying anything but absolutely still trying to make something out of nothing. 

“That’s very you… of you to do.” 

Both of us looked vaguely unimpressed at that statement. 

“Okay, that wasn’t my best work. I’m just saying that maybe there’s a chance you two could be something of an item,” he tells me, a little too giddy for my liking. 

Setting everything on the bar abruptly, “Jesus Christ, Josh. Just because I’m nice to the girl doesn’t mean I want anything more.” I’m trying to sound convincing, even though I know he will call me on it at any moment. I wouldn’t be opposed to it, though. But for god’s sake, Josh doesn’t need to know that. 

“Okay, okay, alright, I’ll stop,” he starts, holding his hands up. But know that I will find out if anything happens between you two,” he squints at me before turning around to continue helping Quinn decorate. 

I watch as he finds himself busy again, but I can tell from a distance that he updates Quinn on his interrogation. If there is anything I know about my brother, it is that he will know everything about everyone all the time, which in turn means Quinn knows everything as well. I let out a small sigh while piling bottles of Modelo back into the fridge. Maybe I should just text her. Is that weird? She’s going to say no anyway. 

Still squatting down behind the bar, I pull my phone from my back pocket. Unlocking it to a handful of email notifications and a few texts from Sam that I ignored earlier.  I love him, but he doesn’t need to ask me every time if he can take some promo pics for the bar. 

I tap on her conversation; my thumbs hesitate for a second. Is this stupid? Am I wasting my metaphorical breath? Maybe she’ll appreciate the thought. 

Me: Hi there. How are you? Are you busy tonight by any chance?

I shove my phone back into my pocket before standing back up, grabbing the few loose cans and bottles across the bar, and tossing them. Looking around at the new decorations, they all have managed to get hung up already, and it’s definitely feeling much more festive. 

“Josh, can you–” I start, but I feel my phone vibrate, stopping me mid-question, “Uh, lost my train of thought. I’ll get back to you on that,” 

I grab my phone and see her name sitting there, making the heat rise in my face. 

Charlotte: No, I’m free. Why? 

The three dots pop up before I can reply, making me more nervous. 

Charlotte: Do you need help with something?

Me: nooo I don’t need anything from you. We’re just doing a little thing here for halloween and I thought I would see if you were interested. No pressure or anything lol.

Those god-forsaken three dots come back, then disappear, and reappear. There is no worse form of torture in the modern day than waiting for a text to pop up. 

Charlotte: Maybe

Okay… Well, it isn’t a no. I look up to find Josh directly in front of me, scaring the shit out of me. I didn’t realize he could be quiet enough to do that. 

“Can I help you?” 

“You looked very intrigued by whatever was on your phone there, brother,” Josh says, with a shitty little grin on his face. 

“Don’t you have things to be doing other than watching me use my phone?” I ask, not able to stop the slight eye roll that came along with it. 

“I’m gonna pretend you didn’t say that,” he says, “ Quinn and I are going to run upstairs to get ready, and then I can take over so you can go put on whatever pirate bullshit you want.” He says, staring at me with a matter-of-fact expression and his arms folded across his chest.  

“Sounds good to me, bub.” 

⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯

 Sam and Willa left shortly after Josh and Quinn, leaving me with the usual regulars to tend to. They weren’t a rowdy bunch, so I got a good amount of cleaning done before the rush of people. 

Maybe. The fact she didn’t say ‘no’ was basically haunting me. It’s not a big deal if she does show up because she is just a ‘friend’. That’s even a strong way of wording it. 

At this point, the sun has been set for a while, which is attracting costumed customers. Some are more clever than others, but regardless, I’m just glad that people seem to like the idea. 

I’m talking to Linda, who’s dressed as an 80s Aerobic Instructor, when I hear the sounds of my dear brother entering the building. He always has a way of making his presence known, whether he means to or not. We both glance over to the door, where he lets Quinn through first, quickly following behind. 

Hand in hand, they joined us at the bar. I just looked at the two of them for a minute, my head tilted slightly. 

“Peter Pan and Tinkerbell?” I finally manage to ask.

“Yes!” Josh says, fluttering the tiny wings he has on. 

I let out a small sigh; I should have known, giggling to myself. 

“I think you two look adorable,” Linda compliments them, eliciting a curtsy from Josh while Quinn does a stage bow. 

“Alright, Tink, come tend bar so I can go change into something more festive.”

After I finally got upstairs, I started digging through my closet, looking for everything. I know it’s in here. I finally found my cream button-up; it was a bit looser on me than most of my shirts, so when I tucked it in; it definitely fit a pirate theme. 

I pull on my black slim-fit jeans, tucking the bottom of my shirt into them. I slide on my brown dress vest over the shirt, leaving it fairly open so that my chest is exposed. I grab the necklaces on my nightstand and walk into the bathroom to make sure they are sitting properly. I don’t need Josh telling me I layered my necklaces wrong again. 

I know Josh has some sort of scarf or belt that would make more sense for a pirate outfit, so I decide to bravely go into his room. Good lord, Josh.  Walking into his room, I always forget that he likes to have things. I mean that nicely; he just loves art, decor, and tchotchkes, so his bedroom would be overstimulating to most. Considering how long I’ve known him, I’m generally accustomed to his ways, but when he keeps his door shut more often than not, it starts to slip my mind. 

Rummaging through his closet, filled with colorful pieces, I find the clothes hanger loaded with scarves. I pulled out an olive green one; earth tones will work, right?  I tie it around my waist, moving in front of his full-length mirror; I look much more piratey than before. 

I look at the time, not realizing how long it’s taken me, I hustle back into my room. I grab the rings from the drawer in my nightstand, quickly sliding them on and spraying myself with another round of cologne to hopefully hold me over the rest of the night. I pull out a single cigarette from the drawer, shutting it a little harder than I mean to. 

Maybe? Her text is still sitting in my mind. What if she does show up? I grab my phone from the counter, slide it back into my pocket, and head out the door. 

“Excuse me, sorry,” I mumble as people pass me on the stairs. I’m moving a little quicker than I usually am because I don’t want to leave Josh bartending alone for too long. Maybe Melody is helping him out? I should have pulled everything out earlier, so this didn’t happen. 

I pull open the door, letting the couple outside into the stairwell. I pull my lighter out, placing the cigarette between my lips and covering the filter end with my hand to block the wind. I take the long way around the building so I can enjoy this while I have a second. Josh is fine, the bar is fine, if she shows up, that’s also fine. I think to myself as I’m rounding the corner. Taking one final drag before putting it out, I hold in the cloud of smoke for a moment before releasing it. I close my eyes for a second, breathing in the cool fall air. Glancing over to the most delightful sight, I’m unable to come up with words fast enough before I hear– 

“Well, hello there, Captain.” 

Charlotte POV

You’re allowed to have fun, Charlotte. That’s the mantra I’ve been repeating in my head since Jacob told me about this party, though the alternative is that this is incredibly unprofessional. 

I’ve been parked and sitting in my car for 10 minutes, building up the will to get out. You bought a costume, and you got ready, and you smiled at the text for about 15 minutes straight. Just go have fun. My hand finally reached for the handle, opening the door. 

My boots make a little click on the pavement as I get out of the car; I smooth out my pants and readjust the little corset so it’s more comfortable. I look at my reflection in my car windows, leaning in to make sure my lipstick is still in place. Okay. Just go. 

Rounding the corner, I see the entrance to the bar, making me slow my pace a little until- 

Jacob? I watch as he walks towards the bar; he looks .. good– No, Charlotte, cut it out. I slowly walk towards him, still watching him as he lets out a quick stream of smoke; why is that kinda…  He sets the rest of the cigarette in the ashtray placed on top of the garbage can. He stops for a second, clearly trying to calm down. Is he okay? His shoulders drop as he lets out a long breath. Suddenly, we’re making eye contact. Shit.

“Well, hello there, Captain,” I say to him. Smooth Charlotte, real smooth. 

He giggles at the name, “Well, blow me down. I didn’t know if I would see you tonight, Red.” 

“I decided that I deserved a little fun after this past week and all.”

“I think you made a good decision,” he says calmly, “Also, your costume choice is just lovely.” I don’t know if I ate too much or if he is actually giving me butterflies right now. 

“Oh, thank you,” I say quietly; I’ve never been good at receiving compliments. We both stand there for a brief second before he grabs the door to the bar, gesturing for me to go through. 

“Ladies first.” 

“What a gentleman– oh, I mean, gentle-pirate.”

The bar is full of costumed people, Halloween songs playing loud over the speakers that you can barely hear over the chatter from everyone.  It’s nice to see how busy the bar is finally.  I had only really been here earlier in the day and honestly, it’s refreshing to know that the bar is doing well, considering how many people are here. 

I followed Jacob to the bar, sitting down, only to notice that his brother was dressed as Tinkerbell. It seemed like an odd choice until I looked down to the other end of the bar to see Peter Pan sitting there. Oh… OH. 

“Charlotte! You came!” Josh says excitedly, “Y’know, I told Ol’ Captain Sparrow that if he just asked you that, you-” 

 “Oooookay, Tink, that’s enough,” Jacob cuts him off, making me laugh. 

He slid a glass over to me on a napkin. I looked down to see that he made me a Boulevardier. He remembered? My heart feels weird. 

“Let me know if it’s terrible, I’ll remake it for you,”

I take a small sip; it’s incredible?

“No, it’s perfect, thank you,” I tell him. 

He smiles at me, even his eyes light up. I watch him walk down the length of the bar, checking in on other customers and replacing their drinks with fresh ones. He’s so soft-spoken that I’m shocked he feels so comfortable bartending. The way he looks at every single customer, giving them his full attention, even for the twenty seconds it takes for them to place their order. He’s so-

“So Charlotte,” Josh starts, pulling me out of my thoughts, which may be a good thing at this rate. 

“How are you doing, dear?” he asks while wiping a wine glass dry. 

“I’m okay,” I tell him, “I am sorry about the other day, I hope you weren’t trying to get out of here.” 

“I was actually coming back from lunch, and you weren’t a bother at all,” he tells me, relieving me that I didn’t mess up his entire day. 

He continues, “Also, never apologize to me for having feelings. I don’t know what happened, but I’m glad that you were able to let them out. Jake is good at handling situations like yours, so you picked the perfect time, honestly.”

“Oh,” I say before taking a bigger sip. 

“Are you here alone?” he asks. I nod quickly, “Let me introduce you to someone. Hold on!” 

I watch as he waves over the person in the Peter Pan costume. They make their way over to us, and with how Josh’s face looks, I’m assuming this is a special person to him.

“Charlotte, this is Quinn,” Josh said, gesturing between the two of us. 

“Hi, nice to meet you, Quinn,” I can’t help how professional it comes out. 

“You as well,” they start, “If you haven’t pieced it together, yes, I’m Josh’s partner.” They let out a small laugh, gesturing at the Peter Pan costume. Okay, thank God, I didn’t want to say that I assumed.  

Looking at the two of them, they really are precious. 

“I love your costumes,” I tell them. 

“Oh, thank you!” they both say simultaneously. 

“So Charlotte, what exactly is your job?” Quinn asks. 

“Well-” I’m cut off by the group of people approaching us loudly. 

I watch quietly from my seat while they all greet each other. 

“WILLIAM,” Quinn hollers.

 “QUILL” 

“QUILLIAM,” the two of them yell at the same time, falling into a fit of giggles. 

I can’t help but wonder what I’m currently witnessing. 

“Oh my god, you look so fucking good.”

“Stop it- no, YOU guys look so good.”

Quinn looks back over to me, grabs the two girls’ hands they have been chatting with, and hustles back to the bar.

“Guys, this is Charlotte!” Quinn starts introducing us. “This is Willa,” they gesture to the petite girl with a cute bob haircut that frames her face so nicely. She’s dressed in light pink. Loofah? Which is quickly clarified when Sam comes into view dressed as a bar of soap, whom I met briefly the first day I came in. 

“I still can’t believe I’m soap, Bird.”

“It was this or Twilight, be glad!”

“And this is Melody, obviously. You’ve met already, though?” gesturing to her, who’s also absolutely beautiful. She’s dressed as Arwen, which means that Danny is dressed as the Aragorn man.

“Hi,” I manage to get out, “Yes, we have, and you both look so great,” 

“Thank you so much!” Melody quickly responds. 

“Oh, thanks!” Willa quips back. 

“Drinks for everybody,” Jake’s voice came from behind me as he slid a bunch of glasses towards us. A chorus of ‘thank you’ surrounds me. Before I can turn to acknowledge him, he’s grabbing my glass. 

“Another one?” He asks, fairly quietly this time. 

“Please,” my nerves are getting the best of me, and the best way to fight them off is not to be sober. 

“Oh, sick! We’re all in couples costumes,” 

“Sam,” Willa hitting Sam’s arm, “Shut up?”

I could feel the heat rising into my face; I had been ignoring that Jacob and I wore the same kind of costume and wishfully thought that nobody would mention it. I guess that ship has sailed.

“We have Peter Pan and Twinkerbell, Lord of the Rings, and Calico Jack and Anne Bonny at the bar– I thought it was safe to assume!” Sam says, his loud laugh following it.  

“Oh guys,” Jake sounds defeated, “Don’t embarrass her. You just met her.” 

He looks back at me, handing me a new drink, “I’m sorry about that. I swear sometimes my brother hates me.” 

“It’s okay. I was kind of waiting for it to happen,” I laughed, “I mean, we are matching so..” 

He laughs at my observation for a moment. 

“Between you and me,” he leans a little closer, whispering, “I think we’re the best dressed here,” flashing me a small smile; oh, how I wish he wouldn’t do that. 

“Charlotte, come with us!” Quinn says, grabbing my hand and pulling me off the barstool. They pull me over to a table where the other girls are sitting. Oh god.  

“Josh told me you were here alone, and well.. that’s not fun,” they tell me. 

“I don’t actually live around here, so I don’t really know anybody,” I start, “Well, aside from you guys, now.”

A slew of ‘oooohhhh’s come out from all of them. 

“So, I’m under the impression you’re all partners with the boys?” I ask. 

“Yes!” “Yep,” “Mhmmm,” quickly followed. 

I take another few sips of my drink, feeling the anxiety starting to melt away. 

“I’m secretly a sucker for romance, so who wants to let me in on the situations here?” I tell them, rapidly pointing around at all of them and the boys. I’m going to be around for a little bit. I may as well get to know them. Plus.. it probably wouldn’t hurt for me to try and make some friends… right? 

“How much time do you have?” Quinn asks bluntly. The other two erupted with laughter. 

I look down at my drink, swirling it around, and then drink the last few sips quickly before looking at them and delivering a monotone, “I got time.” 

“Well, in that case,” Willa starts, “Let me tell you about my sweet, dumb, but hot boyfriend Samuel.” She says while cracking her knuckles. 

“So– I met him at the farmers market, where he proceeded to be an absolute dick to me. And THEN, he was here when I came here on an unsuccessful date, we had to WORK TOGETHER, went on a trip where we got with ONE BED-” Willa pauses for dramatic effect before taking a breath to practically yell, “LIKE THE BOOK TROPE, CHARLOTTE.”

“You sure you wanna hear this?” Quinn interjects. 

“Oh, I’m invested now,” I quickly spit out. I catch a small glimpse of Jacob as he’s grabbing some empty bottles from a table across the room. He smiles and nods at whatever they say; oh, there’s that feeling again. 

Willa continues her tale, but I barely hear her. My eyes fixated on him, watching how he makes eye contact with anyone who talks to him. Making sure that he hears them, nodding along and giggling often. Every so often, letting someone have a genuine smile–

Willa’s voice hit me again, “–and now I guess I like him back.” 

“Oh, my god?” I respond, “That is uh.. A lot?” Oh, I’m the worst person ever. 

“It is a lot, but I guess he was worth it or whatever,” Willa rolls her eyes at the statement. 

Quinn smacked her arm, “You loved that silly string bean for so long. Don’t even act like you didn’t.” 

Everybody was giggling at the call out. I saw Melody look around the table at all the empty glasses before standing up and grabbing them all.

“Let me get us another round, but Quinn, feel free to start whenever,” She grabs their arm, “I obviously know how this goes already.” 

We all watch her for a minute as she walks up to the bar, getting the boys’ attention. 

“Melody is so pretty?” I say out loud, “Oh god, is that weird?”

“No!” 

“Not at all.” 

“We all think she’s hot, don’t worry.”

Before I can look back over to them, Jacob is in my line of sight again. This time, he’s behind the bar, talking to one of the older ladies he seems so fond of. The way they make him laugh is sweet. He’s stood there for a second before he leans over the bar to grab something from them, but the way he leans makes his shirt fall open more; I can see his stomach flex for a split second. Holy shit. Where is Melody with those drinks, dear god- 

“Alright, Quill, let’s go.” 

Melody sat back down at the table, dispersing the drinks to everyone. 

“Welllllll,” Quinn says, “I met him at Hobby Lobby- don’t ask me why HE worked THERE.”

I have got to stop getting distracted by this man. He walks past our table, gently squeezing Quinn’s shoulders as he passes them. They just glance over at him as they’re talking. It’s precious how much he seems to like them. Maybe he’s just a loving person? Oh, god I don’t like that. 

 “But, now we’re just in love, and he’s perfect, so!” 

“...in the cooler?” Willa mumbled, covering her mouth, “Please tell me you’re joking.” 

What did they do in the cooler? Shit, I need to be paying closer attention. 

“Yeah… I probably could have left that part out, huh?” Their eyes widened, looking over at me, with the realization of who they were telling that to. “We cleaned up after! Promise!”

“Wait a second- so, you and Josh.. here?” Willa says, pointing at Quinn, before turning to Melody, “And you and Danny …ALSO here..?” 

Never mind, I don’t want to know. Don’t tell me, don’t tell me, don’t tell me. 

The two nod in sync, holding back their laughs. 

“Well, that’s not fair!”

“This is truly taking years off my life,” I tell them while rubbing my temples, making them all giggle at my pain. 

“I’m not about to make it any better,” Melody says with a laugh, followed by the other two losing even more.

I hold up one finger while inhaling the rest of my drink, “Okay, I think I’m ready.” 

“So Daniel and I actually started dating in High School,” Melody says, pulling a quiet ‘awww’ from all of us, “We were together for a while before I decided to go to college out of state,” she tells us. 

I see him in the background, just scanning the room while Josh is making drinks, well, until he sees me looking back at him. Shit, shit, shit, shifting my eyes back to Melody.

“Anyway– I ran into Josh, who got me the job here, and I’m so thankful for it. The boys are so great, and I’m obviously not going to complain about getting to see Daniel again.” 

“I bet you’re not complaining,” Willa says suggestively with an exaggerated wink. 

“HE sure complained at first, though,” Quinn pipes up with a laugh.

“Oh hush,” Melody tries to brush it off, “I do love him for more than our sex life.”

Willa is quick to reply, “Whatever you say, girly.” 

“So.. what’s the part that will ruin my day?” I nervously ask. 

“Conveniently, the day you came in actually, Jake had sort of… walked in on us.” 

“Walked in on WHAT?” 

“The thing is.. The roads were terrible, so I asked Jake if he minded grabbing Iris-” Quinn quickly cuts off Melody. “YEAH, WE HAD A SLEEPOVER WITH THE CHILD,” Quinn can’t tell us fast enough. 

“Hey,” Willa, chuckling, gently grabs Quinn’s arm, “Charlotte was the only one not involved. You don’t need to yell.” 

“Sorry, I just love Iris a lot, okay?” 

“And she loves you back,” Melody reassures them, “Anyway, yes, so everybody else had a fun sleepover with my daughter, and I closed the bar with Daniel while having a weird argument–” 

Jake comes up between Quinn and Melody, placing one hand on Melody’s back, “I’m sorry to interrupt, but I come bearing not watered-down drinks.”  

He starts placing the drinks on the table, having to slide mine and Willa’s across the table. 

I watch as he makes a little small talk with everyone and how much they all seem to like him. He seems too nice to be real. Everyone laughing with him, I look up at him before he slides my drink over to me. His hands. Oh my. He has rings on… oh my GOD. Trying not to be obvious, I quickly flit my eyes back up to meet his. 

“Thank you,” I mouth to him while the other three are talking. He mouths back, ‘Of course’, flashing me a smile. The boy is beautiful when he smiles. 

He turns to go back to the bar, and I just focus on him walking there; unknowingly, I am being watched.

“Charlotte!” 

“Yes?” I quip back; I can feel the heat in my face, but is it embarrassment or the alcohol? The world will never know.

“Are you… into Jake..?” Willa asks quietly. 

The other two leaned in on our little secret session, which I was not prepared for. 

“Nooo, no, no, no,” I can’t spit it out quickly enough.

Quinn lets out a laugh before choking out, “You were practically drooling over him,” 

“Ha ha.. Nooo.. I wasn’t,” I try to defend myself, scratching the back of my head, “Was it really that obvious?” 

A chorus of yelps elicited when I loosely admit to thinking he’s attractive. 

“Oh stoooop,” I cover my face. 

“Don’t be embarrassed– those Kiszka boys are incredibly charming,” Quinn states, “It’s hard not to fall for it.”

“Yeah, I don’t know about ‘charming’ per se, but they do have some good genes in that family.” Willa taking a light jab at Sam. 

“Really though,” Melody chimes in, “Jake is honestly very charming,” 

“Oh, he is absolutely,” 

“He’s too nice,”

Quinn and Willa tend to talk at the same time, and being a few drinks in does not help my deciphering of who said what, but at least when they’re on the same page, it helps. 

“He has been very easy to work with, so I would believe that,” I try to regain my composure,  even though the fact everybody thinks he’s sweet is not helpful to where my brain has been going all night. 

“I’m sure his brain just shuts down when you’re around,” Willa says into her glass before taking a sip. 

“What do you mean?” 

“Have you seen yourself?” Quinn questions, “You’re so hot?”

‘Mhm’ 

‘Yeah, you are.’ 

I know that my face is absolutely pink at this rate; I just shake my head ‘no.’

“I’m sure he sees plenty of pretty girls being a bartender,” I roll my eyes at the idea that he wouldn’t hit on other girls while he’s working. 

“Pretty sure the only one he entertains is Eleanor,” Melody giggles. 

“I’m almost positive he told Josh that he’d just marry her if he stayed single for too much longer,” Quinn says, looking over at Josh, who just blows a kiss to them. Wow, they’re so cute together. 

I watch as Melody taps on her phone, seeing the time, “Well, guys, I need to go relieve Josh for a bit.”

Quinn quickly stood up with their drink and nodded to the bar. Willa and I followed suit, migrating up to the bar. Claiming a bar stool and watching as Josh comes to find Quinn, quickly kissing their nose and then their forehead before Quinn snuggles themself into him for a brief moment. 

“Pretty cute, aren’t they?” Jacob whispers, scaring the living daylights out of me. 

“They really are,” I say, “And you need a bell or something because Jesus Christ.”

“Oh, I’m sorry,” he laughs, placing his hand on my back for a second, “I just need to get out of there for a minute,” he tells me.

 “So I’m going to run around to clean and just saw you fixated on them.” 

“Well, since you’re here, Jake,” Willa says loudly, leaning over to me and whispering, “Wanna see the boys squirm?” I simply nod with a grin plastered across my face. 

“Don’t you guys think Melody is insanely hot?” She questions everybody.

Daniel violently shakes his head, ‘Yes,’ while Melody laughs behind the bar. 

“I.. uhh,” Jake mumbles, holding the back of his neck, “I have tables to clean,” and quickly walks off to grab glasses. 

Sam’s eyes are wide, and his face is filled with panic. “Birdie, I can’t answer,” he begins to say before his brother abruptly cuts him off. 

“SMASH FOR SURE,” Josh confidently shouts, being met with a high five from Quinn. 

“You’re right, that was worth it,” I whisper, leaning into Willa. 

⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯

I sat with everybody while they talked, well, yelled. This is a much louder group of friends than I’m used to. Granted, I have like..no group of friends. I listen to a lot of very odd conversations filled with Sam instigating Willa so that she would get a little pissed at him. There are plenty of lengthy stories from Josh, which probably wouldn’t take as long if he didn’t tell us every side story that goes along with it, but he’s so animated I guess I can’t really complain. 

“Here, Charlotte,” Melody says, “Jake told me how to make your drink, so .. I hope it tastes right,” 

I take a sip, oh lord, that is STRONG, “It’s great!” 

Why did I do that? She needs to learn… Not that I could even correct her right now. 

I sip on my drink for a while, feeling it hitting harder than I’m used to. Every so often, Jake comes out from behind the bar to make small talk with some of the customers or come bug his brothers for a few minutes. I always hope it’s the latter. 

“How are we doin’, Red?” 

I blink rather slowly, “I’m thriving,” slowly cracking a smile, knowing it sounded terrible coming out of my mouth. 

“Well, I’m so glad,” he tells me. The way he makes eye contact but also watches my mouth when I talk makes me want to scream. 

“You know,” I tell him, what are you doing? , “I dare ye to resist me booty,” the alcohol starts speaking. 

“Are…are you trying to flirt with me?” He laughs out. 

“Maybe, is it working?” I ask, biting the inside of my lip. WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

“Oh– well,” he giggles quietly; leaning in, he rests one hand on the back of my barstool to support himself, but his face creeps in closer to my ear before he whispers, “You don’t even have to try with me, honey.” Fuck me. 

⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯

I spend the rest of the night chatting with Quinn and Willa about the most random things. But I think that is what friends are supposed to do? 

Slowly, people start trickling out as it nears 1 a.m. I say my goodbyes to Sam and Willa, which is shortly followed by Josh and Quinn. Jake was nice enough to let Josh go to bed since he was here decorating so early. 

“Ready to go, ducky?” Daniel asks Melody;  party of one officially. 

“Oh, I am beyond ready,” she stretches her arms out before turning to me, “I’ll see you tomorrow, right?” 

Shit. I already forgot that I told her about the training earlier today. 

“Yes, you will! Can’t wait,” I do my best not to show that I definitely forgot and that I’m definitely NOT going to feel like shit in the morning now. 

“I’ll see you then,” she says with a little wink. 

I turn to the bar, leaning into my hand with a very minuscule smile painted on my face as I watch him. Just waiting for him to look over at me, I can’t help but stare. 

“I can feel you watching me,” he grins from the other end of the bar. 

“I’m debating on how I’m going to get home, is all,” I say with a sigh. 

“Did you drive here?” He asks. 

“Yep,”

“Okay, so, first of all, you’re not going to do that,” he tells me. 

“And why not?” I protest. He sauntered over to me, leaning against the bar. 

“You’re so pretty,” he says to me, glancing down at my lips until I finally pull the bottom one in with my teeth, “Yeah- you’re not driving.”

My jaw drops; he really got me there. 

“I can just call an Uber,” I tell him.

“Charlotte, I don’t love that idea. It’s almost 2 am, and I literally live just upstairs,” Jake continues to tell me I need to stay here, and I don’t know why I’m fighting it so hard. 

“I don’t want to impose,”

“I’m offering?” 

“Touche Captain,” I giggle a bit at the nickname. I bet he likes it. 

“Just hang out for a couple minutes so I can close the bar down,” he tells me. 

⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯

“Don’t you want to clean?” 

“It’s so late. Josh can help me in the morning,” Jake speaks low as we walk into the stairwell. 

“Oh no,” slips out, “oh, I didn’t mean to actually say that,” 

Jake lets out a quiet laugh, “I got you, don’t worry,” 

Before I can react, he has his arm underneath mine, gesturing for my hand. I lace my fingers into his; the butterflies are back. How fun. He holds my hand tightly, letting me put a lot of my weight into him as we carefully go up the first flight of stairs. 

“I think I can do it,” I tell him; I absolutely cannot? 

“You sure about that, sport?” 

I squint at him and immediately stumble up the first couple of stairs of the second flight, letting out a small ‘oop.’

“Yeah, that’s what I figured,” He makes fun of me gently while supporting me again. 

This may be the longest stair climb of my life.

We finally make it to his apartment.

Jake whispers, “You can take my bed, and I’ll just sleep on the couch.”  He’s so cute when he’s concerned.

“Noooo, I can sleep on the couch. I’ve already inconvenienced you.” 

He blinks at me slowly, unamused. 

I can’t stop myself from walking towards his couch, and it’s a humbling moment for me as my legs wobble in the process. 

“No, you don’t,” Jake says from behind me. 

“Jake, really, I don’t mind,” I look back at him, disorienting myself from turning too quickly. 

“Jesus Christ,” he mutters as he grabs my arms to stop me from falling over. I just stare at him like a deer in headlights. 

“Yeah, I didn’t want it to come to this, but,” he says before he wraps his arms around my thighs, lifting me over his shoulder. 

Childlike laughter erupts from me as he carries me through his apartment into his bedroom. I can feel his chest vibrating subtly from giggling with me. 

“Here ya go,” he says, moving one hand to my back so he can set me down.  So carefully, making sure not to drop me, he leans down slowly. The feeling of falling became so real suddenly, that I instinctively held onto his shoulder, which pulled him back with me. He stumbles forward a bit, catching himself before landing on top of me. 

I prop myself up on my elbows as I laugh. He’s hovered over me, with a hand on either side; our faces are so close. 

We both freeze as we realize how close we are. I wonder how soft his lips really are… My eyes defy me, shifting down to look at his mouth, just for a second, as he watches me. 

Clearing his throat as he stands up. 

“Uh- here, let me get you a sweatshirt or something,” he sounds timid. Quickly shuffling through his closet, he pulled out a navy sweatshirt and handed it to me. 

“It’ll probably be a little bit loose on you, but better than sleeping like a pirate?” 

I chuckle, smiling up at him. Simply grateful for something comfortable to wear. 

“I’ll go so you can do that,” still clearly very nervous. 

Pulling my shirt over my head, I quickly pull the sweatshirt over me. I lock the bottom of it under my chin so I can see what I'm doing. Oh no. No, no, no, no. My zipper is stuck, and staring at it makes me cross-eyed. I drop my head back, letting out an angry sigh. Please just unzip. My hands get increasingly sweaty, making the stupid plastic zipper hard to grip. 

I hear a few soft knocks on the door before it cracks open. 

“Can I come in?” He asks. 

“Actually… I um… I need help.” 

Coming in quickly and shutting the door behind him, I just stare at him pathetically. 

“My zipper is stuck,” I tell him, embarrassed. 

He chokes back a laugh, setting a glass of water on the nightstand next to his bed. 

He kneels in front of me; oh, this is terrible. I lift the sweatshirt, revealing the catastrophic mess from me, yanking the zipper every which way. 

“Where the hell did you even get these, Red?” He asks, looking up at me with a soft giggle. 

I wish he would just focus. I don't need to look at him like this. Making eye contact causes my brain to short-circuit, and I stare back at him silently. Watching him try to figure out how the zipper got caught, he’s so carefully moving the fabric around. 

“How much do you care about these?” He asks, gently tapping my hip. 

“At this point,” I raise my eyebrows in defeat. 

“Are you sure?”

I just nod ‘yes’ in response. 

He grabs either side of the zipper and tears it apart quickly. The sound of the fabric ripping was relieving, well, for a second. Both of us smile at the fact that I’m free until he looks back down to see the lace of my thong peeking out. 

I see his eyes go wide, and the pink creep into his cheeks as he pinches the fabric together. 

“Oh,” slips out of me. I let the sweatshirt drop, falling to the tops of my thighs as the now ripped pirate pants hit the floor. 

“So, uh, well,” Jake says, holding the back of his neck while avoiding eye contact, “I will let you get some sleep.” 

I don’t know what possesses me to say, “Wait-“ 

Closing the gap between us, I lean up onto my toes slightly, placing a small kiss on his cheek.

“Thank you,” I tell him before crawling into his bed.

“Of course, m’lady,” he says with a bow. His little English accent laces the words, which makes me laugh. 

“Sleep well,” he whispers, shutting off the light as he leaves. 

I fall back into his bed, wrapping myself up in the blankets. They smell like him, comforting, warm. 

⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯

Chapter Seven

Chapter Nine

FDOG Masterpost | Masterlist | FDOG Playlist

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[pyjamaart]

Year 4 of submitting art for the SiIvaGunner Art Gallery!! >:]

For the fourth time now, I can proudly present my entry for this years SiIvaGunner Birthday Gallery! I had to put up with a lot of obstacles this year, like starting in June when I normally always started in early May, my parents and my brother visiting during the exact time frame I wanted to work on this, a crippling addiction to playing Dragon Quest Monsters and many more.

But as you can see, I really locked in at the end and finished it exactly one day before the deadline (17th June).

Now to explain my vision for this piece: I'll have to admit, since starting my new job in February, I didn't have any time to keep up with the loads of SiIvaGunner rips that are uploaded each day, since I always listened to them at my old workplace while I took care of my mountains of scientific journals. At my new job, I don't have anything to do with journals anymore. I mostly talk to students at the counter all day. Can't really listen to YouTube videos when someone wants something from you every minute. I also do a lot of things related to facility management in between (our library buildings are practically falling apart in some places...), so even when I'm not at the counter, I have way too much stuff to do to listen to rips. Sigh. Sometimes, I miss my old job.........

But I'll try my best to catch up some time in the future. At the very latest in September. My first vacation days in 7 months... Anyway, let's get back to the image at hand:

In the foreground, there's obviously my beloved dynamic duo of besties: Woodman and Nozomi. Woodman has been missing from the channel for 1 and a half years. Please bring him back. I miss my wife, Tails...

For this piece, my theme was centered around my favorite SiIvaGunner joke from the past few months (or has it been years?): The raft ride. I wanted something fun and summer-y, so I decided to put all the characters I drew in cute little sailor outfits. For Woodman, I just drew him in something simple that I thought of myself, which complimented and incorporated his usual armor.

Next we have Nozomi, who dons her outfit from μ's fifth single "Wonderful Rush". I had a few water themed outfits to chose from with her (and Honoka, for that matter), but I chose Wonderful Rush for Nozomi since it just fit with the aesthetic I was going for.

Next to those two is Coraline from the 3DS street pass game "Ultimate Angler", which is also prominently featured on the channel. For her outfit, I just modified her usual attire a little to fit in with the sailor vibe. I also turned her sun visor around because I could for the life of me not figure out how to draw it properly at this angle. Uhhh... I mean, I turned it around because I thought it looked cool.

I hope you can see that I had an absolute breakthrough in Gimp. I think I already talked about it on my Buck fanart, but I finally discovered layer modes. After 4 years of working with Gimp. Spectacular, I know. If you don't notice it here, you'll definitely notice it on the next image in queue for the robot master quest I have going on. I can already spoil you who it's gonna be this time: Tornadoman! I honestly couldn't believe what I was drawing. I think I was possessed by something for a few hours. It was honestly a little scary. But I think you'll see what I mean once you see the actual image, it's really different from the usual stuff I draw.

Getting back to the topic of this picture, let's talk about the background now. I decided to draw a little ship with lots of familiar faces making up the crew.

The ships captain is Honoka, who is standing on the very left of the deck. I took her outfit from μ's single "Heart to Heart!", which also fit into the aquatic theme quite nicely.

Right next to her, under a rainbow flag that's fluttering in the wind above them, is Aquaman. My beloved. Since I drew him into last years birthday gallery image, I decided to do the same this year. I also put a little starfish on his hat because I think it looked cute ;)

Standing epicly and mysteriously on the top of the boat is Meta Knight. I don't know if you can see it when it's zoomed out so far, but he's holding some kind of folded map in his right hand. Maybe they're looking for treasure??

And on the very right of the ship are Tito Dick and Robbie Rotten, reenacting that one famous scene from the Titanic movie.

After that, we shift our focus to the left of the image, where we can see Fluttershy flying over the island from Tomodachi Life.

And that's it for this image folks. I hope I'll finish my Mega Man Fully Charged art before the weekend ends, so stay tuned for that next! And after that, we're going right back to the robot master grind. ;)

Until then, this has been Jenny Pyjamakama, signing off. ;)

[callmegaith]

your real honest opinion on David's character. GO!

I feel like this implies I've been trolling everyone for the past 6 years about how much I love this silly lil guy. Is there supposed to be a /j at the end of that, anon??

Bestie I would not put this much effort into a troll ever 😭 like do you think I sat there and made a whole comic series for a funny little gag??

In case this is genuine tho:

LONG READ AHEAD

cuz of course. You give me the chance to talk about David and I'll TALK

My real honest opinion on David

Paradise

Silly funny fella. Goofy as hell. I think you can read David's attitude multiple different ways in Paradise. To some he comes off as just an asshole

To others he's just a kid being a kid

I personally read his character as somewhat sarcastic and spiteful towards Jakob. His smile? Sarcastic. His "it's been a while brother"? Sarcastic. "I hope I'm not the one who died tonight" while knowing full well it ain't him? Sarcastic.

I'll talk about this more later when I talk about Mr. Rabbit!David.

David has the characteristics of most youngest siblings; He's annoying, he's childish, maybe a little spoiled and needy for attention too.

Not to jump ahead in this analysis and all but in Birthday, the box he needs has text on it that reads "hungry ghost", "ghost who is unable to be reborn" or preta. They're often spirits of people who died full of greed and jealousy. In Japanese, a preta is also "a spoiled child" or "brat"

Based on that information I thought maybe David was jealous of Jakob cuz he wanted to be the golden boy, ya know?

Tldr;

Paradise!David is just a funny lil guy who most likely harbors negative feelings towards Jakob who overshadowed him despite not even being there.

Mr. Rabbit

Who David is now. An older more mature David. Something clicked in his brain and he realized 'okay actually we're all fucked. Peace out guys I'm looking out for myself.'

Brown Rabbit:

I feel like he represents the last bit of David's naivety, innocence, and child-like spirit. The white rabbit (David from the future) sees that rabbit get killed from the window. He can no longer deny what's happening. The child within him he used to retreat to when things got bad is dead. There's only the white rabbit now

I feel like that's also something represented in David's masks

The older he gets, the more devoid of joy he becomes

He becomes more and more aware of his situation.

As a child, you have the blessing of ignorance. That's why the world feels like a safer more colorful place to you until you grow up and you can no longer protected and shielded from the world.

To me, I think that's where David's trauma comes from. His ageing and how fast he's had to grow up and become a man, despite his attempts to remain a child.

In paradise, it's likely he was still pretty much "fingers in ears going LALALALALA" with his eyes closed tightly.

Brown rabbit is all that remained of his ignorance, and now it's gone, leaving behind only the White Rabbit. The David that knows and acknowledges the cruelty of his life. A ghost of his former self.

Speaking of:

White Rabbit

What are we but the products of our traumas and life experiences.

The white rabbit, David from the future, is on a journey to save his soul and be reborn. Obviously, the goal of all the corrupted souls. There is a soul we know succeeded in that and was, in fact, reborn. And that soul is Elizabeth.

Elizabeth was the collateral damage in a battle she had no hand in. She is probably the most innocent victim in all of this family feud going on, and I think because of that, Jakob allowed her to be reborn.

Something he did not allow David to do. I think it's safe to say Jakob and David do not like each other. Seems like David's plans clash with Jakob's and so he has to be taken out of the picture, and yet, David always seems like he has tricks up his sleeve.

Somehow, David is able to go back in time to save himself. What happens after that? We don't know yet

You could argue that he failed and died in the blue cube memory of Birthday. Or that he is simply still out there rn waiting for his story to be told. Both are true cuz that's the nature of Rusty Lake.

David seems to be on his own grand journey, stuck in his own Paradox, desperate to find a way to he reborn.

The thing that stands out of course is David's corrupted soul, or rather, the many different forms of it:

This is probably due to there being multiple different David(s) from the paradoxes he's lived through.

But what is the White Rabbit David if the brown rabbit is David's reborn Asura? Is the white rabbit not his Asura too?

Hard to say. We never seen a corrupted soul take form like David's white rabbit one before, and even more than that, one that retains autonomy. After all, David had enough control over himself to write and leave Dale a letter, meaning he is fully aware of what he is doing. Yet he is prone to violence the way regular corrupted souls are.

It's likely the white rabbit is an advanced form of a corrupted soul, probably the last stages before rebirth.

That or.... Well.... It's just a mask. After all, in Paradox, David spoke with a regular human voice over the phone, meaning he was not a corrupted soul.

In that case tho, if he was already reborn... Why did he say he needed to escape his current "hungry ghost" state?

Obviously Paradox is the most unreliable game narratively cuz you're just going through Dale's jumbled up memories. It's likely he's just recalling an actual conversation he had with David on the phone at the time (which still makes no sense cuz that would mean at the time David was still a human. Or it means he's recalling some conversation he had with David at some point in his life, not necessarily Birthday. OR... That's just a memory the machine is feeding him and it never really happened. Point is, paradox can't be used as a fact for anything)

Timeline is fuuuucked when it comes to David's story so uuuh

We don't know where he is now, what actually happened to him, or wtf is going on with him.

What we do take from his whoooole story tho:

Conclusion

(you did it, chat. You made it this far into my rambly post!!)

David is a really cool and very interesting character that might not appear to be so on the surface. You only really get how complex his character is when you think of everything that has happened in the games. He has a story that is either left for us to piece together or is still not yet fully explored.

To me, David is a character born of defiance and rebelliousness, as well as the need for survival and self-preservation. He is someone who has challenged his own fate, knowing damn well he's up against higher powers, but still taking the chance to save his soul. He is resilient, and stubborn, and just won't accept his fate and die. He has challenged his position in the food chain, a rabbit who is meant to be at the bottom, proving that he should not be underestimated. To me, that's worth loving and admiring. AND IM CHEERING HIM ON! GO DAVID! GO! IM SO PROUD OF YOU MY SON!!

And that's my real honest opinion on David

Thank you for reading.

[foster-the-world]

Such different ideas

I follow Rebecca of Fosterhood on Twitter. I assume I am not the only one who remembers her? She was the single foster mom who adopted two girls very close in age from foster care. When I was looking into foster care I was pretty obsessed with her post. One of the adoptions took seven years and it sounds like their agency was especially terrible/invasive. Although she didn’t always come off great in all of her stories but who does??

Anyway they are on a fancy vacation in the Cayman Islands. She posted a picture of them sitting on a terrace eating a fancy breakfast. She said something about how she would worry about spoiling them but because they are foster to adopt kids they deserve a soft life. Interesting concept but nothing I’ve ever thought. I know her older daughter was more traumatized by foster care because she had visits and uncertainity for seven years. My kids were both three when adopted. They never had to deal with any uncertainties. Foster care was annoying for us as parents but not hard on my kids day to day life. Anyway maybe that’s the difference.

I do worry about spoiling my children - they have things I could never have dreamed of as a kid. Our financial situation is better then my parents so that trickles down to the kids. I love traveling so my kids have done more trips then a vast majority of adults. I travel hack and we prioritize over other things but still can only do it because we are very privileged. We have decided the benefits of travel out weigh the downsides of “spoiling” them. We’ve actively avoided the schools where the student population is very well off because they are never diverse but also because we want economic diversity. And again privileged to have another public school option. We don’t want our kids to think everyone is rich and white/asian - which is a nyc problem because the economic disparity is so high. So we worry about spoiling them and in some ways do but its unrelated to their adoption status. I would never think well it’s okay if Bee/baby boy gets something fancy but not Rebel.

We totally acknowledge the loss of adoption. That loss is multiplied when you are adopted outside of your culture. We will do what we can (therapy, relationships with bio family, living in diverse areas) to help them through those things. And also I think recognize there is no “getting through” such a big loss. Our kids can have wonderful lives and still always have to live with what it means to lose your birth parents. They will have to grapple with that and decide what it means to them. That’s not something a fancy vacation is going to make up for. Obviously Fosterhood wasn’t implying it would but still didnt sit right with me. I also don’t think of my adopted kids as victims that deserve repayment. It’s something they will have to deal with but everyone has something they have to work with. The loss that comes with adoption is a big one, no doubt, but they aren’t the only ones who have to deal with big loss. Anyway guess I’m just grappling myself with balancing recognizing my children’s loss without making it define them. In the end I mostly know it has nothing to do with what I think. As they grow they will decide what being adopted means to them and we will follow their lead.

[niabang]

Only Me and you

Continuation of The Summer it Came True

Previous chapter

Chapter 2

Pairings: Bangchan × black female reader named Kel

Word Count: 1214

More under the cut!

The house you and chan had rented was a little bit on the outskirts of seoul, so it was quite a long drive to get there.

It was a modern duplex. It was fully furnished, had an open concept kitchen, had two master bedrooms, a laundry room, and the best part. A swimming pool.

You hadn't swam in a long time, and you really loved swimming. You were finally going to get to do it.

"You see what I meant by pictures don't do the place justice?" Chan asked you. He was right. The place looked way better in person. Chan had already been here while you were still in Australia to sort out the booking and set a few things up.

You remembered how he called you to ask for everything you guys would need in terms of food and cleaning supplies, and you wrote him a list.

When it was time for him to go shop, you told him that you were going to pay for it and you guys got into an argument about who was going to pay. Obviously.

You even argued about the rent for the house, and his argument was that he didn't pay rent when he stayed with you. When he said that, you couldn't help but wonder if he was real.

He stayed with you for ONE week, and he wanted to pay a whole month's rent. He was truly insane.

You told him there was no way he was going to pay that bill on his own and he shouldn't bother trying to convince you because you both made money and letting him sit back and do everything didn't sit right with you.

You agreed to split the rent 50:50, and he paid for all the groceries himself. He was so annoying sometimes.

"It's so pretty!" You were actually so impressed by it. Chan told you the code for the door so you could open up while he got your bags out of the car.

As you opened the door, the lights in the living room turned on. You were a bit shocked. You forgot the house was automated.

Chan followed you into the house and began to start showing you everything. He had stocked up the kitchen and put cleaning supplies in the store.

"You can pick whichever bedroom you want when we go upstairs. That is if you don't want to share a room with me." He said in a sly tone.

"I think I'll stick with the safer option." He obviously caught what you were hinting at because he got all red and started laughing a bit.

As you climbed up the stairs, little lights on the wall came on so you could see where you were going. The only things upstairs were a mini sitting room, two bedrooms, and the laundry room.

Chan showed you the two rooms and told you to pick one, but they were basically the same thing?

You picked the one closer to the stairs, though.

"Hey, I think I'm gonna go shower and pack out my stuff. I don't want to be burdened with that when I wake up tomorrow." You told him after he dropped your two big suitcases and a mini one in front of your door.

"Do you want me to help?" He asked you.

"No, Chan, I can do it myself. Go find something to do." Yes, you sounded mean, but you had a tiny surprise for him, and if he stayed with you in the room, it would spoil it.

"Wow, so mean." He said sarcastically and turned towards the direction of his room.

You had arranged your things in the room and taken a shower, and you kind of felt bad for shutting chan out on you guys' anniversary.

You put on some black shorts and the white shirt he had left you two years ago (You were so romantic), and you made your way to wherever he was in the house.

He was in his room, so you knocked, and when he asked you to come in, you told him to close his eyes and hid the gift you got him behind your back.

He was sitting up on the bed, so you got on the bed and sat on your knees in front of him. You got out the necklace you bought for him and started to put it around his neck

"Are you trying to strangle me?"

"Oh, be quiet." You rolled your eyes at his joke and clipped the necklace onto his neck.

"You can open your eyes now." The necklace you got him was silver with a key as a pendant attached to it. When he opened his eyes, he looked down at the necklace and smiled.

"Happy anniversary." You said as you pulled out the same necklace from inside your shirt, but yours had a padlock as the pendant instead.

"Thank you for acknowledging me as the key to your heart." He was red and speaking through a grin.

"And who said the key was for my heart?" You asked.

"So what is it for?" He was never letting it go, was he?

"The padlock on my necklace, end of discussion." You were not about to get all mushy at 1am.

While you were still talking, chan was eyeing you up and down. He seemed to have noticed that you were wearing his shirt.

"I'm still not quite sure what the gift is here. The necklace or you?" He had such a way with words it always had you stumped. The sly grin he had when when he said something a bit suggestive added to it too.

You punched him a bit on his shoulder, and he grabbed you by your waist and pulled you onto the bed next to him, trapping you in his hold.

"I like your shirt." He said to you when you faced him.

"Thank you. A special someone gave it to me." You said playing along.

"Well, that person has amazing taste because it looks good on you." You raised up your head a bit and gave him a peck on his cheek.

You guys didn't say anything for a few minutes and just enjoyed each other's presence. Being in his hold felt so natural, and you missed his smell. The smell of his cologne and his natural musky scent mixed together clouded your senses in the best way.

"You hungry?" He broke the silence after a while.

"I'm starving." You were honestly glad that he asked that question because you were in the mood for a late night snack.

"How does rameyeon sound?" He asked, standing up from the bed.

"Only if you make it." You replied, standing up with him.

You guys went downstairs, and you sat at the kitchen island quietly watching Chan prepare instant noodles for you both. You wondered if he noticed that you were staring holes into his back.

"Here you go." He said, handing you a bowl.

"Thank you." It smelled amazing.

You guys ate, and when you were done, you laughed late into the night while watching tik toks.

At some point, you guys walked up to the upstairs sitting room, and you both fell asleep on the couch there.

Tightly secured in each other's arms.

[typekiku]

Thoughts on Mahoyo Movie

hello hello everyone!

how are all my fellow type moon fans and other "people" doing?

good? good!

anyways so i saw some shit takes going around on the net and decided i would write out my opinions on them here. screaming into the void can be real therapeutic especially for a fellow mahoyo fan like myself.

without further ado here i go

AOKO RINFACE?!?!

(Ignore the somewhat low-quality picture here.)

This is probably the funniest take since it actually is the very opposite: Rin is based off Aoko!

"bUt hOw kIkU? "You poor lost soul may be thinking, and this is actually correct. FSN did, in fact, come out almost a decade before Witch on the Holy Night did. Congratulations, you are right! Pat yourself on the back, champ.

With that being said, Rin is still based off Aoko! Don't believe me? Let's see what Nasu himself has to say on this matter.

NASU: Yes, the heroine with glasses from old "Fate" named Ayaka Sajyou had a rival character who was a total rich-kid, spoiled heiress type. She would look down on you and laugh at you, like Luvia. Her servant was the Lancer. You could say she was the basis for Rin's character. When Shirou snagged the main character position for "stay night", it was this character who transformed into Rin to fill the rival role. We wanted Shirou's rival to be more likeable than the snobby heiress, though, so we took inspiration from Aoko Aozaki, a character Takeuchi and I both like. Azaka, Akiha, and Rin are all Aoko-type characters, but I'd say Rin is the most like Aoko. I really didn't feel like making "Witch on the Holy Night" when we were working on "stay night", so I made the executive decision to create a feminine Aoko. Though I suppose she turned out to be more of a clumsy Aoko than a feminine Aoko... Takeuchi seemed to intuitively understand what I was going for, and his "Fate version Aoko" meshed well with my vision for Rin.

from : Fate/ Character Material II

(https://tri-hermes.org/Materials/cmii-rin.html)

So yes, indeed, Rin was based on Aoko. If you are still confused on how this is possible, you must understand that Witch on the Holy Night is one of Nasu's very first works, written all the way back in 1996, being an almost 500-page novel at the time.

It was obviously shelved for a long while, but the characters within it have remained influential, showing up throughout various different works of Nasu's, but especially Aoko and Touko, who would go on to be important throughout the Nasuverse.

(Also, Soichiro Kuzuki is basically a colder soujuuro and probably even from the same organization.)

Hell, we even have some original artwork from how Aoko looked back then. Compared to how Rin looks now, they don't really look that similar, to be honest.

Now this Aoko, drawn by Takeuchi in TYPE MOON character material all the way back in 2006, after fate/stay night, could be argued to look a lot like Rin, but even that would be a stretch of the imagination (and eyes).

Regardless, what is my point here? Its silly to call Aoko a rin face when:

a) She doesn't even really look like Rin (I'm not even going to bring up Koyama's version of Aoko since that's meaningless).

b) She precedes Rin in both having been created before her and designed before her.

That doesn't mean the movie version of Aoko doesn't look like Rin, because not only does she kind of look like her, but it's probably intentionally meant to provoke these kinds of takes since, in the eyes of most of the audience for Witch on the Holy Night, Aoko might as well be a completely new character.

Honestly? who cares? This "Aoko looks like Rin" business pales in comparison to a bigger worry of mine... How will Ufotable properly adapt Mahoyo?

Mahoyo is a visual novel that has more quiet scenes than action, and will they really manage to adapt that well or lean more into flashy, hyped action scenes?

This worry of mine stems from Ufotables Heaven Feel films, which while I still thoroughly enjoyed, I felt disappointed at all the cut scenes that served to establish the relationship between Illya and Shirou, and likewise the cut scenes between Shirou and Kirei, which are both just as important as Sakura to the main story.

Instead of focusing on the main climax of Heaven's Feel and the climax of the whole FSN, which is Shirou's final battle with Kirei, they extended the Salter vs. Rider fight and made it out to be the centerpiece of the route, which it is in fact not.

Judging from the trailer it will likely adapt up to at least chapter 6 which leaves the rest for maybe another film? possibly even a trilogy which i mean i just don't see happening to be frank but i could be surprised!

Most importantly....

WHERE IS MY FATE ROUTE ANIME DAMN IT??? I HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR SO LONG... TEN YEARS AT LEAST!

ahem

So yes, that is all I have to say on this matter. I'm both excited to finally get to see Mahoyo in film and for others to get into this series that I so love! It will be great to see others get into it, even if it is possibly a shitty adaptation.

also seeing others call this a fate spinoff physically hurts

Thanks for reading my rant of the day!

cyaaa

[teenyweenyeenymeeny]

I know u csn obviously tell who this is ;3 but who in ur opinion is the most to least CG coded of the phantom thieves im very interested to see what u think bc i cant decide

WELL you have definitely come to the expert. ough this will b difficult though. this will be. Biased especially since it has been soooso long since I actually played the game

Number one ummm Haru 🥺 mostly because of nepotism I will not deny that… but waaa mommymommymommy just imagine having tea parties with her… she would have lovely stuffed animals that she would let you cuddle all you want… even though she was the type of kid to keep her toys so neat and tidy you’d think they are brand new even now so maybe you would b worried about messing them up but she would not mind! she knows how to wash them without damaging them if they are properly messy and if they are just getting to look “well loved” she thinks that is sweet!! oughhhgh imagine wearing the sweetest little outfits she picks out for you… I love her sooo much waaa

Number two… is Makoto probably! She is more obvious I think than Haru? Because Makoto is the responsible one! She’s mama friend! She is good at planning and making sure everything goes well! Like she will make sure she always has some of your baby things with her even if you are big Just In Case and she prepares cute lunchboxes! You can go on picnics nd stuff with her or maybe they are for school :0 nd also. Buchimaru. Friend to you both. I like it when cgs like cute things as well 🤍

Number three is Ann iii am trying so hard to not be too biased I would put her higher if I let myself be more biased. She just ouuughg waaa she is so sweet 🥺 I’m SO sorry that I can’t have a coherent thought about her. Mmmmm sharing lots of desserts! Spoil. Each Other >:) even though uh oh sometimes you end up with tummy aches together also </3 cuddle all better 🥺 nd mmmm Ann does dress up with you waaa she is good at. Fashion so you know when she says you look soso cute then t means a lot!!

Number four is Ryuji ough he’s like. Big brother most EVER he deserves to be in a rank together with Ann I think together they r like. Cool big brother and sister who let you join in on their big kid games but r soso patient with you if you don’t get them. SO so sorry to Ryuji to not say as much about him as th girls I promise I lovlovlov him it is just. Hard to Organise My Thoughts the longer I spend writing this hdkdjdjd I like him so much

Number five is Yusuke ough he does. Arts and crafts with you mainly like ough wht f he draws a picture and then you colour it in… obviously fingerpainting. Nd mmm he can paint your face like your favourite animal if you want! You make a picture for him and he goes oh your attention to detail is exquisite little one and then he puts it somewhere special 🤍 he doesn’t put on a baby voice for you at all he doesn’t get the appeal

Number six is Akira I’m SORRY the only reason he is so far down is because he’s way more baby to me 🥺 I know this is not a cg → baby ranking but. It Does have an effect on his ranking. Although just a teeny one because if I didn’t have to give them all their own numbers they would all be number one 🥺 mmm he is good at caregiving but not a caregiver you know. Like he is. Thoughtful and kind and lovely but he’s also just a baby it is like a little kid with a hamster like… yes he is so good at taking care of it but maybe don’t leave him unsupervised for too long. You know. Like especially if you are doing something fun while little he will start to feel little as well 🤍

Number seven is Morgana I’m sorry but he is. Kitty adjacent. He cares for you as much as a kitty can!! He can cuddle with you and be a weight on your chest and nuzzle into you but he cannot make a bottle or be cuddled INTO or help you get ready for bed. He tries his best though 🥺

Number eight is Futaba I’m SO SORRY I like her SO MUCH and she is not BAD at caregiving she is like Akira… she is lovely at caregiving she just needs to also be reassured throughout or she would worry she is doing it wrong 🥺 she regresses too but like. Not quite baby she is like tween and perhaps then is when she does best with littler regressors cuz she can feel like a cool big sister and show off all her cool stuff

Number nine is Akechi. I’m sorry except I am not because this guy is the only person I am confident on the placement of. He is either the fussiest grumpiest baby or he is easily irritated by kids. If he is trying to take care of someone he would not SHOW that but. You know

Sorry to Sumire enjoyers. I do not remember her well and I don’t think it would be fair to her to rank her

[thetorturedbutchdepartment]

hiii saw ur reply to my ask and fucked myself like… 5 separate times last night. in my bed, at my desk, in the bath, my car. i couldn’t stop thinking about your cock and how i could make you feel. not only multiple places but multiple ways. fingering, touching, water pressure, dildos, vibrators 😵‍💫 you name it handsome and i used it looking at your pictures. you fill me up so nicely, and get me unbelievably soaked.

god, jealousy is killing me :( you think if i grip my pussy extra tight around your cock you’ll be stuck with me? make you knot me up & keep you forever? fuck everybody else baby. regardless of what they think i know i could be the best for you. i’ll kill them <3 i have my cutest lil dagger that says femme on it, can you fuck me with the handle after?

to be honest, i’d settle for simply being your sex toy. keep me locked up and use me when needed pls <3 ur personal human fleshlight with multiple features ;) and obviously made to cuddle & smooch you after.

miss you my sweet sweet pretty boy <3 i know this is a long one but i have brainrot tehe

- 🎀

oh fuck, baby. fuck…. i’m actually going crazy here. you did such a good job for me, baby. so good. tell me, how much did you enjoy cuming over and over for me? touching yourself while looking at my pictures, thinking i was the one fucking you so hard and oh, so good. cause trust me, me and my cock are better than anything you could use. any toy. any other thing in your pretty little mind that you can use to try to satisfy yourself, but deep down you know that i’m the only one who can do that for you.

that’s so cute and so fucking sexy. mmm why don’t you come here and try, baby? show me how bad your pussy is craving my cock, cause i know im fucking crazy for you. i’d knot you so deep, so hard, you wouldn’t be able to move from me for a few days, baby. and hmmmm fuck, that’s probably one of the sexiest things someone has ever said to me. such a possessive baby, so fucking sexy for me. i love it. you should show that dagger someday, so i can use it to fuck you like you deserve it.

that’s all i want. my perfect sex toy, for me to use whenever i want, however want, wherever i am. and baby, of course. all the cuddles and kisses for you. you always do such a good job for me, i’ll spoil you with absolutely everything.

you’re so cute. i miss you too, baby. please, i loved reading this and i loved that this one is quite longer. just let your pretty little mind work when you’re writing me, okay? promise i’ll love everything.

[asoulofatlantis]

She is such a whiney dramaqueen. He literally jumped into his death to save her and then freed her from her prison knowing the possible risks and yet she stands here whining that Squall would kill her, like there is ANY reason to believe he would, even IF she would become controlled again. This is just the so called "princess" whining for attention yet again.

I get that this huge picture of Winhill is supposed to show what the town meant to Laguna... but... you know... shouldn't he have chose the part of Winhill were he, Rain and Ellone lived, instead of a picture of that part of the town?

^^' Squall... uh... has no respect for anyone if they haven't proved themselve worthy of it, right? I mean, he obviously doesn't know Laguna is his father (and frankly, I am sure he wouldn't care either way...) but this IS the Präsident of Esther and he has done A LOT in his life to save Ellone, the same girl Squall loved like a big sister, so... he could at least try to have a little bit of respect.

At least these days, he is aware of that. He should have been aware of that back then already... but... spoiled milk and stuff.

The part inside me that has been heartbroken thanks to a certain digimon ship is not happy about those words... but... thats a trauma for another day. Lets go and save the world first.

You mean aside from the prominent cheekbone, right? XD Jokes aside... no one told the boy about his parents, how can you talk so casually about him looking like his mother?

Your friends just spoiled the surprise... but... you know... Squall is totally indifferent to it, as per usual, so... whatever XD

This isn't even a stupid "damsell in distress" anymore, this is just pure utterly ridicioulus plotconvinience at this point. Rinoa, Irvin and Selphie can fight, Laguna, Kiros and Ward who are supposed to be there too as well and yet, your are going to tell me it was a thing done in mere seconds for Seifer to get his hands on Rinoa? PLEASE! (I know that, if you have her in your team he holds her at gunpoint to stop you from intervening, but while it makes more sense that this happened here, when everyone was distracted, how likely that no one outside was fast enough to notice Seifer and be on the defence?

Now we have finally reached the fourth and thus last CD of the game. This means its almost over.

I hope I can finish this as quickly as possible. I am so over this game at this point.

I only unsealed Items and Ressurcetion. No saving, no nothing else. So... wish me luck! XD

Thanks to an itenm called "Hero" that I had 99 of thanks to the fact that this part of We-Mod is still working, I made my character invincable and won the battle. Wohoo!

Now... I watch the ending and then I watch it again on YouTube so I can make screenshots because the whole thing is on auto-text now and I don't want to stress myself.

Squall ending up at Edeas house in the past was only to get some lats second information in. Like how Edea got the idea with the garden and how she ended up with Ultimacias powers. But it really felt unnecessary.

ALSO Squall ended the scene with saying he is not alone, as small Squall was feeling very alone and as we know, that was something that kept stuck with him for a very long time... BUT then he ended up beeing lost, only beeing fund by Rinoa after some horrible nightmare that almost killed him. The message behind that last minute panic drama is a bit questionable. I get the connection to her nightmare and I absolutly did cry and panic back then as a player because I thought Squall might be dead... but for a Squall that was always scared of beeing alon and now FINALLY understood that he was not, it should have been so that he immedeatly found his way back to not just loveinterest Rinoa but also his friends welcoming him with open arms.

I guess you could say overall the biggest issue of this game was that they wanted to push a really bad ship onto you know matter the cost. And it ended up ruining the game.

Would you look at that? Seifer is actually free and happy. After everything he has done. Did I accidentally along the way trade Final Fantasy for a Trails game without noticing? XD Jokes aside. I guess we could forgive him by just kicking him out from the garden, given how he was manipulated by Ultimacia the whole time too... I mean we did forgive Edea. So... yeah... whatever.

I loved that scene. It made me tear up and all... but it is such a freaking "HOW DARE YOU?!" - Moment, because they play freaking "Eyes on me" in the background. The Song Julia wrote for her and Laguna. This is... so damn freaking wrong!

ALSO... Pothole. Rain was burried as Rain Loire, because she got married to Laguna before he left. HOWEVER Squall is called Lionheart, which is Rains Maidenname. Not just easily confusing any player who hasn't got the message yet, but also making you wonder WHY they would do that other than plotconvinience. The only reason to not give Squall Lagunas last name, was to make it easier to hide who his father is, but in game, no one would have had the need to do that. Why should they? So, once again, it makes no sense at all top burry Rain as Rain Lore, but give Squall into the orphanage as Squall Lionheart. Especially since Ellone was with him the whole time. Why would she not disagree with that?

We also never see if Laguna and Squall managed to... you know... talk about things. It would have been nice (to would have spoiled that Squall is definitly alive) if Squall would have visited his mother grave with Ellone and Laguna. It would give this plotpart some closure as well.

Also... who comes to some party with a camera that is running out of akku in less then 30 minutes? It was nice tho to end this with at least some sort of closure for the other characters, even tho they deserved more than what they've got. A LOT more.

Look! I am usually all in for a nice little kiss-scene but with this ship... it doesn't feel any good at all. Because you just know, if this would be realistic... it wouldn't last. But I guess, if you play it for the first time, it is a nice moment, despite the ship beeing unshippable bullshit from beginning to the end. I guess all you wanted back then, playing the game for the first time, was that Squall was alive and happy. And I guess we got at least that.

SO.

The game is finally over.

I give it... honestly I think about 5 out of 10 points, but I guess I am a bit too harsh on such an old game. So give it 6 out of 10 points. Tho that is almost too nice.

[vs-redemption]

Hajime’s brows furrow a little and he shakes his head about your worries*

“Cindy, it’s never annoying when you sent me pictures of the meals you’ve made. I always look forward to them and they always get me hungry! Sharing photos of our meals or what we came across randomly or even voice notes about our day was what I looked forward to each day. I like exchanging stuff like that but haha excuse me that I haven’t sent much of my own. Work’s had me busy last week so I’ve been eating out most nights. Makes me appreciate your bento more. Home cooked meals always hits the spot here and here,”

*He pats his tummy then his heart with a grin and a wink. He basks in the spring sun and cool breeze while you two finishes up lunch. His heart is still thumping around in his chest from nerves and giddiness; he wonders if it’s noticeable while he lounges and listens to you. You take him by surprise when you say that you don’t mind working for how he’ll spoil you, his eyes going a bit wide and blinks before smirking*

“Oh? I like that. Something tells me you’re gonna have me on my toes here and there. Letting you know right now, darlin’, you can make me work for it too,”

“We have the blanket if it does buuuut it is a bit small. So, we do have to cuddle close. Plus, sharing body heat is always a good way to keep warm. And an easy way to sneak a kiss on the cheek or two”

*He helps you clean up after all the lunch has been eaten and even wipes down the area. Hajime admires you for a moment when you stand, letting himself burn into his memory of the sun’s rays being your halo while sakura flutter about you. He wishes he could take a picture to preserve this stunning image for you but he didn’t wanna put you in an awkward spot. He gives you a tender smile and nod when you offer a hand, taking it tenderly while he lets you help him stand. Once up, he gets a little playful and twirls you away from him with a little laugh then has you spin back to him; his other hand finding your free one when you face him again. Hajime’s eyes sparkle with affection and playfulness; you can see that he’s earnest to explore with you*

“Ready to explore, sweetheart”

(yaho my dear! i hope you had a good holiday weekend. just wanna say i appreciate you ^w^ hope your work week goes well!)

*I feel so relieved when he reassures me that he'd enjoyed the pictures I'd sent. To be honest, I'd felt so shy the first time he'd sent me a voice note. I'd never gotten those from anyone before, so I'd been a blushing mess hearing his voice come out of my phone. I was slowly getting used to it though, and even getting brave enough to send a few of my own back. The phone calls and voice notes had helped me feel closer to him.* No worries. I get it. Most nights I'm too exhausted to cook too. That's why I've been trying to meal plan more on the weekends to save myself the temptation of eating out. But hearing that you haven't had many home cooked meals lately has me even more excited to cook for you next time.

*My cheeks feel warm when he touches his heart and winks at me. A part of me ached to offer to meal plan with him or even for him. It would make me happy to give him a stack of prepped meals on a Sunday, knowing he could come home and just heat it up and have a good hot meal during the week. Maybe it was a little early to be doing that kind of stuff though. Just the fact that I wanted to do that at all was a testament to just how much I liked him already.* *My breath catches at the way he smirks at me and predicts that I'll keep him on his toes. And when he tells me I can make him work for it so boldly, it's the first time that I really feel a strong wave of physical attraction. I'd been so giddy about how sweet he was and how well we'd gotten along so far, and obviously I'd noticed that he was attractive and a great kisser. But a hint of a new kind of chemistry had blossomed in my belly at that comment. And it had me blushing when he moved right along to talk about sharing body heat and sneaking kisses. It took me a second to gather my thoughts and reply.*

Making you work a little sounds kinda fun. *I admit with a shy smile. It surprised me when my first instinct when feeling so shy and vulnerable was to move closer to him and not away. I stay put where I am though, still getting used to the feelings he brought out in me.* In that case, I look forward to it getting chillier later so we have an excuse to be closer.

*My pulse doesn't get a moment to settle because it's off racing again just as soon as he takes my hand and spins me after we clean up the picnic. The look in his eyes when he takes my other hand and peers down at me with so much promise in his gaze has me feeling weak. I was in danger, but my fight or flight instincts weren't telling me to flee. They were telling me to stay and fight to keep this man at my side. I smile up and him and nod in agreement.* I'm ready too.

(Ahhhh Mod. I AM SWOONING. Hajime is such a good guy and that more feisty side coming out made me blush!)

[eggcris]

You have friends you can confide in, right? I hope that you’re not alone struggling with this. Vent in these asks if you need to. No one’s going to judge you for that.

this sounds so sad lol but no, i have no friends. after i graduated high school i moved an hour away, and did online college (which i dropped out of) so i have never given myself the opportunity to make any friends. i mean, i talk to a couple people that i went to school with, but it’s no longer the type of relationship where i can feel comfortable dropping everything onto them. that wouldn’t be fair anyway.

but, i’ve found comfort being alone. it doesn’t sting anymore like it used to. obviously things would be a lot easier if i had someone here, but i’m not going to go out of my way to find someone just to dump my shit onto them. and that’s okay with me, i don’t want to be a person people constantly worry about it feel bad for. i just want to be me. i’ve made a lot of mistakes, and i’m a lot to handle sometimes but i just want someone to be there for me because they care about me as a person, not because they feel sorry for me.

and as for the vent, i’ll leave it down here. it’s not for anyone specific to read, i just agree that it would be nice to get off my chest:

i hate being an adult. and that sounds like such a cliché thing to say, but i’m so tired of it. it’s hard battling with mental illnesses yet still having to wake up every morning and work just so i can have something to eat at the end of the day. i feel like i’m stuck in a loop that i desperately want to get out of. i’m not saying i want to sit on the couch all day and magically make money to pay all of my bills. i just want to finally have a sense of financial relief and not have anxiety gnawing at the back of my brain telling me what i should be worrying about next. i just want to be happy. that’s all i could ask for. this sounds so dumb but genuinely some days the only thing that gets me through the day is my cat. her name is eevee, after the pokemon. i always smile because she looks like a shiny. she can be such a spoiled asshole sometimes but it’s like she knows when i’m needing love. she always sits on my chest and purrs, like she’s healing me lol. that sounds so cheesy but it makes me happy to think about. i’ll attach a picture just in case anyone actually makes it this far into this seemingly pointless post.

[jade-len]

UPDATE: my friend absolutely loves sqq.

i'm?? honestly a little surprised that he actually enjoys it so much? he's at the part where sqq bets on luo binghe at the immortal alliance conference. first three things he said to me today? "sha hualing a baddie", "god it's really fucking good", and "it's kinda fruity tho"

and, you know, i thought that he picked up luo binghe's little antics! from his flirting to the waist massage offer, etc

nope. when i ask why, he says it's because it seems like every time a guy is introduced, sqq starts talking about how beautiful they look, and that it's "just the vibes". which, isn't wrong per say

so now i'm like, "is that it?" and he just starts talking about how sqq describes the men in this novel, especially when he meets liu qingge ("look it's not gay to appreciate a man's beauty but, i don't know!"). but he doesn't suspect anything, not even luo binghe's behavior, so,,,

anyways here are my friends thoughts about svsss so far. of course, with quotes that are obviously not super accurate but it's pretty much what he said

- "the main character's kind of a dickhead but it's so funny, my god. i genuinely felt bad for the skinner demon because of him. the fucking easy mode."

- *struggling to pronounce qingqiu* "can i just call him by his original name. please. look, i may be chinese and even speak cantonese, but it's still a struggle, okay!?"

- "shen yuan's and luo binghe's relationship is pretty wholesome. especially the dream part :)"

- "this book is so unhinged. it's absolutely cracked out. but at the same time, the writing is so good too and actually heartfelt?"

- "i feel like luo binghe is secretly a little shit but we just don't know because we're in yuan's perspective. like, he wanted to spite liu mingyan or something!" (did the jealousy completely fly over my friend's head? i have zero clue)

- "the system HAS to be a person. it's an asshole and it's so funny to read every time. deducting points left to right. i swear, it's the severus snape of svsss"

- "i love the artstyle so much, i wanna use it as a reference so bad and incorporate some of the style into mine. lowkey, it kind of reminds me of genshin impact? i don't know why, just the vibes of it!"

- *shows him the sha hualing vs liu mingyan art in the svsss russian edition* "holy shit-"

- "i love how shen yuan isn't a boring main character. like it really makes me happy because usually, transmigration mc's have such bland personalities. he's so fun. he's not the most sane, but he does seem to be the most mature out of all of them."

- "i hate ning yingying. why? because she's so dumb! she keeps getting our binghe (yes he said 'our') in trouble! i could envision the beatdown scene so well, he was just trying to do his own thing but nooo she has to include him she hasn't helped at all it's like-- look i know that she's supposed to have low iq but i-"

- "everyone in this novel is so stupid. but in a good way."

- "what? no no oh my god that's too sad. that's not fair! the original binghe should've stayed in the svsss world. they could've been, like, twins or something! i'm sure shen yuan would've loved them both anyways! wait wait, let's stop talking about this!! i need to experience it for myself first! you're gonna spoil it at this point!" (i told him a little bit about the bingmei vs bingge extra)

- "can i please just search up the second volume and order it? what? why not yet?? i don't really care if i get pictures anymore, the writing makes up for it plenty anyways. i won't look at any spoilers, promise!"

i think it's safe to say that he enjoyed it! ahh what'll happen when i drop volume 2 on him

so today i tricked my very straight male friend into reading svsss.

okay look, i wasn't planning to at first and it's not like it was completely my fault. he wanted to read it!

i was showing him how badly they fucked up mu qingfang in the donghua by comparing it to the english novel design (he said that mu qingfang went from looking like a soft dilf to a predator registered on the epstein island list). and then, i showed him how different some of the other character designs were like gongyi xiao's ("he looks like he'd be a genshin character" -friend, to eng novel design) and luo binghe's ("lowkey, he kinda gives airbender vibes" -friend, to bunhe eng novel design)

so that was all i was gonna show him, nothing else. but after seeing them, he goes, "these designs actually look hella cool. what's the book called?"

now, do i:

A. tell him the name, eventually revealing that it's a danmei when he looks it up?

B. just straight up tell him that it's a danmei?

C: don't tell him the name just yet, spill the summary, get him interested, and tell him to not search anything up about it because there's heavy spoilers and it will reveal them the moment he types it up on the search bar

i go with C, obviously.

me: so, basically, some guy named shen yuan transmigrates into an incel harem male power fantasy novel where the protagonist, luo binghe, has hundreds of wives. thing is though, the guy pretty much took over the body of binghe's teacher he had when he was a teenager, who turns out to be a really scummy dude. and now he has to be nice to him so that the protagonist doesn't rip off his limbs and put him into a pickle pot in the future to suffer for eternity.

friend: that sounds hilarious and horrifying at the same time.

me: yes it is, and you should read it. it's like. my favorite novel at the moment. but don't search up anything about it because people spoil that shit. i'll let you borrow my novel

friend: nah don't worry, i'll just pirate it

friend: wait. does it have pictures?

me, my plan coming together: yeah, it has pictures. buuut, when you pirate it, it doesn't. trust me dude, i tried and was severely disappointed. plus, the physical copy is so much better

friend: fuck yeah ok thanks

me: hold on though. i'll text you later to see if my friend who's borrowing it rn is done reading it

he's hyped. he's excited. he craves a good book and a good transmigration interpretation. he's especially happy about the fact that it takes place in a chinese setting with cool powers and an actual good main character. "this sounds so good, god i wanna read it so bad."

i tell him that binghe is actually adorable, too. that it's pretty much found family! my friend then asks if shen yuan adopts him and becomes a father figure or something.

and i said "yes". you know, like a liar. (the father figure part probably isn't a lie though)

now i'm gonna give him the novel tomorrow! of course, i'm gonna cover the chapter 2 bunhe sexual awakening scene with washi tape and say that my baby cousin (sorry baby cousin, you would never <\3) scribbled all over that paragraph with her markers, and since i'm a neat book freak, i put washi tape and just wrote the scene! i don't know if that's really all too believable, but he didn't seem to care that much. just a simple "if my baby cousin did that to my book i would punt them into the sun"

i think what'll be more hilarious is the fact that you can't really tell that svsss is a BL. especially not volume 1. there's like, only a few lines indicating, but if you remove the baby binghe sexual awakening scene then you probably won't be able to know (...if you don't really read romance or anything. idk he's kinda dense anyways). so let's hope he gets attached and has a slow descent into the homo before i drop svsss vol 2 on him!

ok anyways i'll update you guys later with a reblog. maybe in about two or three days lol

(also don't worry, we already fuck around with each other on a daily basis like this. he's already tricked me into reading some manga i was unprepared for, and i thought that it'd be funny to mess around with him using svsss this time lol)

[indianbarbie]

Feel your desires.

Okay so for many of us, when we think about something like, for example, apple pie - we can basically smell it or taste it even though it's nowhere near us. If we think about a really fluffy and soft blanket we can pretty much feel it with our hands, even though we're not touching it.

This can be so useful when we want to manifest something.

Why? Because with that you can live in your imagination even if the 3D is completely different and your desires will come to you even faster. Obviously this is so much easier if you already know what something smells/tastes/feels/looks like but it shouldn't be a problem with most things.

For example, let's say I'm manifesting a very luxurious life. I wanna live like a spoiled princess. What do I do? Every night when I lay down in my bed I close my eyes and I imagine myself laying in the most comfortable bed. I can feel the high quality mattress, I can feel the silk sheets and my comfy pjs, I feel relaxed because I know I have everything I want. When I drink my tea or coffee I imagine myself drinking it on a balcony, I can already hear the birds chirping, I can feel the comfortable chair I'm sitting on, I can see my beautiful garden and the green forest behind it, I can smell the earthy scent in the air.

If I want a new laptop I'm gonna imagine myself picking it up and opening it. I can feel it's weight, I know what it will feel like when I open it, I can hear the sound of it turning on.

Same thing with money. Probably all of us have already had a banknote in our hands so we remember what it feels like. Now all I have to do is imagine I'm counting my money. I just feel that banknote over and over again, I can feel a bunch of money in my hands, I can smell the money. But normally I have the majority of my money on my bank account. It's also super easy. I just feel myself picking up my phone, opening my bank app and I can see the desired number.

I can imagine what all these things feel like so I just close my eyes and let myself feel what I want to feel instead of what's actually happening around me.

This puts me in such a great mood and when that happens I just think to myself "yes this is my life, my reality and I love it". That way I already know what it's like to have my desires so I can live in the end peacefully. Think about it, you probably already know what most of your desires feel like. If it's something you've never experienced just let your imaginations go wild and find the best way to feel that thing.

I know some people can't use their imagination like that so if you have a problem with that you can try making vision boards and just acting as if all those pictures are yours. But if you're the person who can feel things like that you should definitely use it.

I know this isn't a new method, but it's so simple that I feel like sometimes we forget about it.

[milkdoie]

nct dream + acts of affection.

not requested!

featuring — mark lee, huang renjun, lee jeno, lee haechan, na jaemin, zhong chenle, park jisung !

warning(s) — mention of food

[ MARK ; tying your shoelaces !

no matter how capable you are of taking care of yourself and completing your own tasks, mark’s protective instincts merely will not let you. the minute he gets an s/o, he’s all over the place trying to take care of you to the best of his abilities!! if he notices your shoelaces are untied, he’ll literally bend down, put your foot on his knee and tie them up for you :(( doesn’t matter where you are, he won’t let his baby trip!!

“babe!! your shoelaces are untied, let me get that for you!!” he happily smiles as he grabs your hand to stop you from walking any further along the sidewalk.

[ RENJUN ; painting you pictures !

renjun absolutely loves painting, so much so that your first date was actually finger painting on a great big canvas after a lovely picnic at the park <3 he likes to classify you as his muse, his inspiration and his motivation to continue living life to the fullest. though he hasn’t attempted to paint a portrait of you yet, he paints you gorgeous landscapes and little doodles he does if he’s bored. you have a whole drawer full of his art pieces in your room :D

“another one?” you ask, gasping at the ocean painted onto a piece of white paper. “yup! do you like it?” you leaned up and pressed a sweet kiss to his lips, “of course, my love.”

[ JENO ; doing your hair !

this is,, a little random, to say the least, but jeno just loves it when you let him do your hair!! it doesn’t matter when, how, etc, he will sit down with you on the couch and brush your hair for hours if you’d let him. it all started when you pulled a muscle in your arm and you needed assistance detangling your hair, and that’s when jeno stepped in! ever since then, he’s honestly found sitting down with you in silence super therapeutic and relaxing. he finds excuses to try out little styles he’s learned on tiktok all the time <//3

“hey y/n, i found this braid tutorial on tiktok the other day,,, can i try it out on you?” he shoved his phone into your face, causing you to back up and squint at the light. “that looks so complicated — are you sure you’d be able to do it?” he faked an offended gasp, “of course i can do it! turn around, i’m about to blow your mind; i could surely get a hair styling job after this.”

[ HAECHAN ; play fighting !

hyuck is kind of known to express his love in a rather, aggressive way, though he is definitely able to be serious. you’re normally woken up by getting a pillow thrown in your face, or the rare occurence of him literally jumping on your bed and screaming at you to “wake up, loser.” it’s obviously all playful and he means no harm, and he’s never actually ended up hurting you in any way.

“ow- hyuck, what the fuck?” you shove a pillow into his face with a deep frown etched on your lips. he laughs and throws it back, “what? that didn’t hurt, stop being a wuss.” you scoffed and hit him in the shoulder as you found a new spot on the floor, and away from your boyfriend.

[ JAEMIN ; feeding you your food !

i think of jaemin as the type of boyfriend to baby the absolute hell out of his s/o — you’d just be his precious little baby that MUST be protected at all costs. even if you’re completely capable of feeding yourself he’ll make up an excuse like, “let me pamper you! you deserve it <33333”

“i can do it myself! eat your food before it gets cold~” you whine. jaemin sits back in his seat and sulks, “let me love you, y/n!!!”

[ CHENLE ; spoiling you !

no matter how much you protest, no matter how many times you tell him that you don’t need any more expensive perfumes/colognes, chenle loves spoiling you!!! he loves to take you shopping, he loves surprising you with humungous bouquets of flowers!!!!! has a bit of a bad habit of just,,, buying you things even if you don’t know about it; you get a new surprise at least once a week.

“you really didn’t have to, lele — you got me flowers last week.” you looked down at the arrangement of white roses in your lap as chenle chuckled. “and what happens when they die? you can have these! i love you~”

[ JISUNG ; sharing his clothes with you !

he really likes the feeling he gets when he sees you in his clothes, specifically hoodies and t-shirts. he thinks it’s so cute how his hoodies fit a little oversized on you if you’re smaller, and if you’re around the same height then he contemplates actually giving you the clothes because you look so good in them HAJSJS :0 he also sprays his shirts in his cologne so it smells like him :((((( and when you’re away from each other it’s like he’s kind of still with you :(((

“is it comfortable? do you want another one?” jisung questioned, looking over to see you snuggling into one of his black hoodies. “hm? oh no, this is fine.” you held a small grin, reaching over and running your fingers through his hair. he shyly looked away as a light blush took over the apples of his cheeks.