#So it’s a different reality and does not diminish the struggle.

[morakh]

Don’t read the papers, make the paper.

[capitalism-is-a-psychopathy]

Billionaires destroy more than they create

In a land often championed for its economic opportunity and equality, the American Dream promises that anyone who works hard can rise to prosperity. But for many in today’s middle and lower economic classes, that dream is fading, shadowed by a reality that feels increasingly rigged. At the heart of this issue lies a stark and glaring imbalance: billionaires, a minuscule fraction of the population, wield a staggering concentration of wealth and influence. This is not just an issue of economics but one that touches the foundations of democracy and fairness.

Imagine the economy as a massive machine, built to churn wealth throughout society. In an ideal world, this wealth would cycle effectively, where each part contributes and benefits in turn. But as billionaires amass wealth at unprecedented levels, this machine has come to function more like a funnel, siphoning resources from the broader society and concentrating them at the very top. This dynamic, driven by complex financial structures and tax strategies, isn’t merely an accumulation of personal fortunes but a systematic extraction from the economic potential of others. The capital that could have flowed through wages, education, and public infrastructure is often diverted into private bank accounts and shell companies, rarely benefiting the people who drive and build the economy day by day.

As wealth accumulates at the top, so too does political influence. Billionaires, with vast financial resources, can fund political campaigns, lobbyists, and entire networks of think tanks dedicated to shaping policy. Through these channels, they push for tax policies, regulations, and trade agreements that benefit the ultra-wealthy at the expense of middle- and lower-income families. Politicians, indebted to these donors, increasingly look to billionaire interests rather than to constituents’ needs. This creates a disturbing feedback loop: billionaires influence politics to further policies that reinforce their own wealth and power, leaving the broader populace with dwindling opportunities to influence their own government.

This concentrated power extends far beyond campaign finance and lobbying. With ownership over significant segments of media networks, billionaires control the narratives that millions consume daily. Through these media outlets, they shape public opinion, diverting attention from policies that would challenge wealth accumulation and pushing narratives that frame the ultra-wealthy as essential “job creators” or “innovators” rather than acknowledging their role in widening economic divides. Issues that might threaten their economic stranglehold are often buried, while others, that create division and distract, are amplified.

For the middle and lower classes, this confluence of wealth, media, and political power has a real impact. Stagnant wages, diminishing job security, and rising costs of living aren’t natural outcomes of a complex economy—they’re symptoms of a system shaped to benefit those at the top. Policies that could lift working-class Americans, like raising the minimum wage, universal healthcare, or better labor protections, are often stifled in legislative deadlock, thanks in part to the political influence of the ultra-wealthy who stand to lose from them.

So, as this cycle continues, the gap between billionaires and everyone else widens. The billions accumulated at the top no longer signify mere success but a barrier to mobility for everyone else. The middle and lower classes find themselves carrying the economic burdens, often working harder for less. Meanwhile, billionaires remain insulated, living in a different economic reality, one far removed from the struggles of the average American. This isn’t just an economic imbalance but a distortion of democracy itself, as the machinery of power and influence is pulled further from the reach of ordinary citizens and held more tightly by those whose interests rarely align with theirs.

Without addressing this imbalance, the promise of opportunity, the cornerstone of the American Dream, becomes less attainable with each passing year, not just for the lower and middle classes but for the nation’s future as a whole.

Addressing their manipulation

Billionaires and their advocates often employ a familiar set of narratives to justify their wealth and the structures that enable it. These arguments, framed in terms of the free market, capitalism, or fear of socialism, are not only misleading but often serve to distract from the deeper systemic issues at play. Below is a breakdown of these claims and the counterarguments that expose their flaws:

1. “It’s Just the Free Market at Work”

The myth of the “free market” implies that billionaires achieve their wealth purely through talent, innovation, and competition in a market where everyone has equal opportunity. But in reality, the U.S. economy is far from a genuinely “free” market.

Counterpoints:

• Government Subsidies and Tax Breaks: Many billionaires’ businesses rely heavily on taxpayer-funded subsidies, special tax breaks, and other forms of government assistance. Large corporations frequently lobby for policies that grant them tax advantages, including offshore loopholes and capital gains tax breaks. This creates an environment where they aren’t competing on equal ground but rather with significant state support, distorting the market in their favor.

• Anti-Competitive Practices: Many large corporations, especially in tech and finance, engage in monopolistic behavior, buying out competitors or using aggressive tactics to drive them out of the market. This concentration of power stifles competition, contradicting the notion of a “free” market where anyone can succeed if they work hard.

• Inherited Wealth and Privilege: A significant portion of billionaire wealth is inherited rather than self-made. Generational wealth compounds, giving the ultra-wealthy an enormous head start over those without similar family resources. This challenges the idea that wealth accumulation is simply the product of individual merit or a fair market.

2. “This Is What Capitalism Is Supposed to Look Like”

The argument here suggests that capitalism is an inherently competitive system, where the most successful rise to the top, benefiting everyone through innovation and job creation. This narrative hinges on the idea of “trickle-down economics,” where the wealth of the richest eventually spreads throughout society.

Counterpoints:

• Trickle-Down Economics Doesn’t Work: Decades of evidence show that wealth rarely “trickles down” to the rest of society in any meaningful way. Income inequality has only widened, with wages stagnating for most workers while billionaire wealth has soared. Billionaires tend to reinvest wealth in ways that concentrate their holdings, like in stocks, rather than in ways that benefit the broader economy.

• Wealth Extraction, Not Wealth Creation: Many billionaires achieve and maintain their fortunes through rent-seeking behavior—extracting wealth from existing resources rather than creating new value. Hedge funds, private equity, and real estate empires often profit by cutting costs (like labor) rather than by innovating or producing new goods and services. This dynamic benefits investors but hurts workers and consumers.

• Capitalism Can Take Other Forms: The capitalism practiced in the U.S. today, sometimes called “neoliberal capitalism,” focuses on minimal regulation, tax cuts for the wealthy, and privatization. However, other countries demonstrate that capitalism can function with stronger social safety nets, wealth redistribution policies, and tighter regulations on corporate power. Nordic countries, for example, balance capitalism with robust welfare systems, ensuring a more equitable distribution of wealth and services.

3. “Without Billionaires, There Would Be No Innovation or Job Creation”

A popular myth is that billionaires are essential “job creators” and “innovators” whose wealth ultimately benefits society by funding new businesses and creating employment. This claim positions billionaires as indispensable to economic growth.

Counterpoints:

• Public Funding Fuels Innovation: Many of the biggest technological advances, including the internet, GPS, and medical breakthroughs, were developed with public funding rather than billionaire investments. Government research grants and subsidies often lay the groundwork for major innovations that billionaires later profit from. In other words, society bears much of the financial risk, while billionaires reap the rewards.

• Small Businesses Create Most Jobs: Small businesses, not billionaires or large corporations, are responsible for most job creation in the United States. Big corporations often eliminate jobs through automation, outsourcing, or consolidation. They may employ a large workforce, but they also tend to exploit workers through low wages, precarious employment, and cost-cutting measures.

• Billionaires Accumulate Wealth Through Wealth, Not Innovation: Many billionaires maintain their wealth not by creating jobs or innovating but by using their existing capital to generate more wealth, often through financial instruments that have little to do with actual economic productivity. Stock buybacks, dividends, and passive investments grow their fortunes without necessarily contributing to broader economic prosperity.

4. “Any Alternative Is Socialism or Communism”

When calls arise for higher taxes on the wealthy, stricter regulations, or broader social programs, the response is often to invoke the fear of “socialism” or “communism.” This argument seeks to paint any attempt at wealth redistribution or regulation as a slippery slope toward total government control.

Counterpoints:

• Social Safety Nets and Regulations Are Not Socialism: Social safety nets, progressive taxation, and regulations do not equate to socialism or communism; they’re features of a balanced capitalist system that seeks to prevent extreme inequality and protect public welfare. Countries like Germany, Canada, and Denmark combine regulated capitalism with strong social programs, resulting in healthier economies and greater well-being for citizens without abandoning capitalism.

• Inequality Threatens Capitalism: Growing inequality and economic instability can undermine the foundations of capitalism. A healthy capitalist economy requires a strong middle class with buying power, which excessive wealth concentration undermines. Reforms like progressive taxation, labor protections, and universal healthcare aren’t a rejection of capitalism but rather a means of stabilizing it.

• Historical Success of Mixed Economies: Many of the most successful and prosperous countries practice a mixed economy, where capitalism coexists with social policies that promote equality. The U.S. itself has employed a mixed economy model in the past, particularly after the New Deal, which implemented social safety nets, labor protections, and financial regulations that led to a period of unprecedented growth and prosperity for the middle class.

5. “They Earned It Fair and Square”

Finally, the idea persists that billionaires deserve their wealth because they “earned” it. This argument suggests that any policy aiming to redistribute wealth is fundamentally unfair, penalizing those who worked hard to succeed.

Counterpoints:

• Systemic Advantages and Wealth Hoarding: As previously mentioned, many billionaires begin with advantages—like family wealth or elite educational opportunities—that aren’t available to most people. Additionally, billionaires often employ complex strategies to avoid taxes, lobby for favorable regulations, and capitalize on government subsidies. These factors mean they haven’t earned wealth solely through hard work or merit.

• Billionaires Didn’t Build Alone: No billionaire operates in isolation; they rely on infrastructure, public education, and the work of thousands or millions of employees. A CEO’s wealth is made possible by a web of collective contributions, yet that wealth is rarely shared equitably. While billionaires might be rewarded for their role, their fortune is far from the result of individual effort alone.

In short, these narratives around billionaires often mask a more uncomfortable truth: today’s system is structured in ways that favor the ultra-wealthy at the expense of the broader population. Economic reform, rather than a threat to capitalism, is a necessary step to ensure a more just, equitable society where wealth accumulation doesn’t depend on privilege, influence, or systemic manipulation.

Making a change

Addressing the economic imbalance and the unchecked power of the ultra-wealthy presents a unique challenge, especially given the intense political polarization in the United States. For the middle and lower classes to push back effectively, they will need to build a coalition that transcends party lines and focuses on shared economic interests rather than divisive rhetoric.

1. Build Awareness Through Shared Issues, Not Ideology

The rhetoric around “free markets” and “socialism” often obscures real issues of economic struggle that affect both conservative and progressive working- and middle-class citizens alike. Instead of framing the issue in ideological terms, framing it in terms of tangible, shared grievances can help bridge the divide:

• Focus on Economic Inequality: Income stagnation, unaffordable healthcare, and housing insecurity are felt across the political spectrum. By shifting the narrative from “class warfare” to “economic fairness,” advocates can sidestep partisan language and emphasize the shared experience of economic struggle.

• Highlight the Impact of Corporate Power on Local Communities: Framing issues around how large corporations hurt small, local businesses can resonate strongly with both sides of the political spectrum. This approach often taps into conservative values around community and self-reliance, while also aligning with progressive critiques of corporate overreach.

2. Organize Around Labor Rights and Worker Protections

Historically, unions have been instrumental in improving working conditions and advocating for fair wages, and labor movements transcend political divisions. Many Americans—left, right, and center—share concerns about the erosion of workers’ rights, stagnant wages, and the declining influence of the average worker.

• Expand Union Participation and Labor Movements: Reinvigorating unions and expanding labor protections could give workers a stronger collective voice. New labor movements that focus on economic rights without overtly partisan language could attract support across the political spectrum, particularly when they champion issues like fair wages, workplace safety, and job security.

• Support Worker Cooperatives and Employee-Owned Businesses: Promoting models like worker cooperatives or employee-owned businesses can offer a compelling alternative to the current structure of corporate ownership without resorting to divisive rhetoric. These models prioritize local control and shared economic benefits, appealing to values of self-sufficiency and fairness.

3. Pressure Politicians on Key Economic Policies

A key to bridging the partisan gap is to focus on policies that benefit the broader populace rather than framing them as part of any ideological agenda. The majority of Americans, regardless of political affiliation, support policies like fair taxation, healthcare reform, and increased access to education when framed in terms of fairness and opportunity.

• Promote Tax Reform as “Fairness,” Not Redistribution: Instead of advocating for “redistribution,” proponents can push for tax policies that ensure everyone pays their fair share. Policies like a wealth tax or higher taxes on capital gains can be framed as holding the ultra-wealthy accountable rather than demonizing them, a stance that resonates with people who value fairness and personal responsibility.

• Advocate for Antitrust Legislation: Pushing for stronger antitrust laws to break up monopolies and prevent anti-competitive practices can appeal to both sides. For conservatives, this aligns with the values of market competition; for progressives, it aligns with corporate accountability and consumer protection.

4. Engage in Alternative Media and Independent Journalism

The ultra-wealthy often own or influence major media outlets, which can shape public opinion in ways that protect their interests. For the middle and lower classes to gain a clearer view of economic issues, alternative media sources and independent journalism that aren’t beholden to billionaire interests are crucial.

• Support Independent News Outlets: A growing number of independent news organizations are dedicated to in-depth economic reporting without catering to corporate interests. Supporting these outlets allows individuals to access a range of perspectives that help reveal the true impact of policies on ordinary people.

• Utilize Social Media Responsibly to Build Cross-Party Awareness: Social media, while often a divisive force, can also be used to spread information about economic injustice. When used responsibly to share facts, case studies, and stories of economic hardship, it can cut through the rhetoric and provide people across the political spectrum with a shared understanding of the issues.

5. Prioritize Voting Reform and Campaign Finance Reform

Money in politics is one of the core reasons why economic policies favor the wealthy. Bipartisan support for reducing corporate influence in politics is possible, especially when the focus is on fairness, transparency, and accountability in government.

• Promote Campaign Finance Reform as an Anti-Corruption Effort: Campaign finance reform, which seeks to limit the influence of wealthy donors and corporations on elections, can appeal to conservatives and liberals alike who are frustrated with the influence of money in politics. Instead of framing it as an anti-capitalist measure, framing it as an anti-corruption measure can attract broader support.

• Support Voting Reforms for a More Representative Democracy: Reforms like ranked-choice voting, ending gerrymandering, and preventing voter suppression can help create a political environment that more accurately represents the will of the people rather than special interests. By creating a more representative democracy, policies that reflect the economic needs of the middle and lower classes have a better chance of being enacted.

6. Create Cross-Partisan Grassroots Coalitions Focused on Economic Issues

Many grassroots organizations are focused on economic justice, but they tend to align themselves with one side of the political spectrum, often losing potential support in the process. Building cross-partisan coalitions that emphasize shared economic challenges rather than ideological differences could foster stronger, more united advocacy for middle- and working-class issues.

• Organize Around Issues, Not Parties: Groups like the Poor People’s Campaign, which focuses on poverty and economic justice, have successfully united people across political lines around issues that transcend party loyalty. This approach allows people to focus on their shared struggles, making the movement harder for politicians to ignore.

• Build Community-Level Alliances: Many economic issues are felt acutely at the local level. By focusing on community-level initiatives that address healthcare, affordable housing, and education, people can create practical, on-the-ground solutions that don’t require alignment with national politics. These local successes can serve as models for broader change.

7. Emphasize Civic Education on Economic Policies

Finally, bridging the gap will require education and awareness. Many people accept billionaire-fueled rhetoric because they lack exposure to alternative perspectives. Civic education efforts that focus on teaching economic principles, tax policy, and the influence of corporate power can empower people to understand the real impacts of current policies on their lives.

• Create Accessible Educational Resources: Podcasts, documentaries, workshops, and community discussions can all serve as tools for demystifying economic issues. When people have a clearer understanding of how things like tax policies and wage laws work, they are better equipped to make informed decisions.

• Promote Financial Literacy and Empower Individuals: Financial literacy programs that help individuals understand budgeting, credit, and investments empower people to navigate the economy more effectively. While this doesn’t directly address systemic issues, it gives individuals a greater understanding of the forces shaping their lives and can be a first step toward broader engagement.

By approaching these issues with a focus on shared struggles, fairness, and practical solutions, the middle and lower classes can work together to build a movement that transcends political divides. This movement can challenge the status quo without becoming mired in divisive ideological battles. The real strength of such an effort lies in its ability to unite ordinary people around a common vision for a fairer, more just economic system—one that serves all citizens, not just the wealthiest few.

[dearweirdme]

Living in South Korea would make it challenging for Taehyung to have a family as a single, non married man. Surrogacy is not legal or illegal, but the parent needs to adopt the child. The same would go, I gather, if you used a surrogate elsewhere and then brought the baby to SK. The surrogate mother is also considered the legal mother. While laws are changing, same sex couples are not able to adopt - and single men who want to adopt are seen as suspicious.

Given how filial Taehyung is, I don’t see him leaving SK and moving someplace else. His family, friends and work are in SK.

Seems like a bit of a conundrum.

Hi anon!

So even when I say this is offensive, you don’t take a moment to consider why that is and your response is to tell me about legislation? I’m aware of legislation… you however, are not taking queer people’s feelings and relationships seriously.

Let’s take this conversation away from Tae for a second, because I think it’s because of him that you find this difficult (wether it’s the need to have him be with a woman, or just that you enjoy the mystery more than his actual feelings I’m not sure).

Imagine for a bit that you’re a gay man. You’ve known since puberty that you are gay. You’ve struggled with coming out, because you know society is harsh and you will lose loved ones when you do. When you fall deeply in love though.. you do. You want to be with your partner in public and your love for each other means that you will sacrifice the relationships with loves ones who don’t accept you. That is how deeply you love each other. Life is hard, but love is strong and the two of you are happy and you want to stay together for the rest of your lives (not different from straight people at all). When the topic of marriage is prompted.. do your thoughts go to your partner, or do your thoughts go to an unknown woman even though you have been very much in love with a man for years and have built a life together?

Sk might be behind in queer legislation, but queer couples do exist. The queer community does fight for legislation to change for the very reason that they are incapable of changing who they are. They see the world change around them, they know that somewhere on the horizon there’s a strong possibility of them obtaining more rights.. because that is what’s happening in the world. When you diminish a queer couple’s feelings of love as though it is something they would consider leaving behind.. as if they would consider being with a partner of the opposite sex because it’s easier.. you do not understand the hardships they have possibly already gone through and you do not understand anything about love.

I’ll do you one better. I have recently watched The Boyfriend on Netflix. It’s a Japanese queer dating show on which we see queer men (two bisexuals and the rest gay) living in a house together for a couple of weeks while trying to find love. Two of them actually start falling in love and do you know what they talk about on one of their dates? Adopting a child. Japan doesn’t allow gay marriage and therefore doesn’t allow queer couples to adopt. Do you think these two men, while on a queer dating show…. on a date with each other… are talking about having a family with a woman?

Do better anon! Seriously, please invest in watching footage of queer couples trying to have a family. Go and watch same sex couples finally being able to marry when their country allows them.

If Tae is queer like we think, and in a relationship with Jk for years.. when prompted about marriage he would think of Jk and starting a family with him. The idea of it having to be a female comes from you and from homophobic society.. it has nothing to do with the reality and feelings of actual queer couples.

[genericpuff]

LR is really, really good but I just wanted to say something- this is probably more about the readers than LR itself, but when it's said that LR is so much better than LO artistically (which it is!!), like say in terms of writing, pacing, and art - I think it's also not an apples to apples comparison, since LR has LO to draw inspiration from and a lot of external reactions to LO to learn from for what to do and not to, while LO is both time-constrained and (when it started out), didn't have much basis to compare to.

(The SA plotline is one example.. many criticize RS and say she shouldn't have written it in the first place but that's the thing - she actually didn't know. While I agree it's really shitty and RS has definitely ignored a lot of criticism she should take into consideration, the conclusion that she shouldn't have written it in the first place wasn't something that she knew about until after fans pointed it out. She definitely is mishandling it now, but I think writing that in at the start was born out of actual ignorance - different from her problems now, since she's now actively ignoring and shutting down the feedback she does need to get better. This blowing up educated a lot of people- probably not you specifically- and opened up a lot of dialogue for things that Rachel likely didn't have access to at the start of LO. and has no excuse for now.)

Anyway, yeah - Love Lore Rekindled, thank you for creating it! Genuinely, I do - this ask isn't meant to be a bad thing against you at all, nor do you need to reply to it.

Not a bad thing in the slightest, I honestly agree with you! The reality is that LR wouldn't exist without LO, so to try and compare them feels kind of like... it defeats the point?

Like obviously Rekindled was made with similar intentions, I'm not gonna sit here and pretend like Rekindled wasn't made out of spite over what could have been, but at the heart of it all, it doesn't exist to 'flex' on LO, really it's just to help recapture that joy and beauty that the original comic had that I fell in love with in the first place. It's only because I loved the original concept and foundation of LO so much that it exists. That's also why I call it an "AU" of sorts, as a sort of "alternate reality where LO didn't turn out the way it did" experiment lmao Mostly by maintaining the consistency in the original art style and paying off those earlier plot threads that didn't payoff the way we were anticipating or were dropped entirely. Sure, it's trying (and in some ways succeeding) to be "better" than LO, but that definition of "better" and how it's applied was what we were hoping to get out of LO in the first place.

So yeah, when people say "the art/writing is so much better than LO's!" part of me tries to take it as the compliment it's undoubtedly intended to be, but also I'm like "ack, that's not the point!! the art still doesn't look exactly like LO, I'm failing!!" LMAO I suppose that's part of the magic, but it doesn't fully align with my original goals or intentions. That's the struggle of art stylization, you can try and mimic another person's work as much as you want, but you can never mimic the them that's in their work, just like how you can't remove the you that's in yours. I want to be at peace with my own work and what I put into it, so I try not to compare them too much and just treat them as their own unique separate things (even if one of them is directly trying to resemble the other). It's okay that Rekindled doesn't look or read exactly the same as LO, but in saying that it's 'better' defeats the point of why Rekindled exists in the first place and diminishes LO's part in the process. LO has to exist - all of its best and worst parts - for Rekindled to exist, so putting LO down just to raise LR up... isn't that kind of what we criticize all the time within the comic, how it can't seem to hold up its best parts without putting down others? Why can't they both have their own things worth appreciating on their own exclusive of one another?

This is also why I generally ask people to not share Rekindled with the general Lore Olympus hashtags or post about it in the fan groups (and why I don't mirror it on Webtoons) because I just like... don't want it to come across as some "booo you like LO??? go read this instead!" type deal. I want people to be able to enjoy Rekindled as its own standalone story as an extension of LO, in the form of what could have been. There's a very thin line in the sand between Rekindled being just what it is and it being used against the fans as if it's a crime for them to still genuinely enjoy LO. I can't enjoy LO in good faith anymore, but that doesn't mean I make Rekindled for the sake of ruining that good faith in others. I was a fan too, once upon a time, so Rekindled is just as much for the fans as it is for the people like me who started off loving this comic just to be disappointed in the end and yearning for the "what if" that could have been.

And yeah, it's absolutely an advantage that I have in my court that I have the knowledge of knowing what LO started as and where it went wrong to work off of, an advantage that Rachel didn't have. It's like when I look back on my original pages in Time Gate: Reaper and think "man, I wish I had known xyz when I made these so they could be better!" but if I hadn't made them like that the first time, I wouldn't be able to reflect on them now knowing I've improved. In that same regard, Lore Olympus had to run so that Lore Rekindled could crawl. And I'm forever thankful to LO - and Rachel - for giving us something we could all connect over to such an extensive degree that Rekindled could exist at all.

[scatterbrainedart]

I’m sure being aroace spec has given me a somewhat unique view of what love is and should be, but like. I feel like I need to articulate it, because I will probably never publicly do it again lmao. Bear with me, if you’d be so inclined :)

I am a firm believer in that love is a decision you make, as well as an emotion. I also firmly believe that liking something is not the same as loving something. I am an artist, yes? I love art. I do not like every single piece of art I see or make, nor do I always like making art. But even in the deepest depths of my worst burnout periods, I do not love it any less. I love my mother utterly and throughly, more than anyone. And even though I also like her for the overwhelming majority of the time, that is not always the case. It does not mean I love her any less.

I believe that you have little control over Love the Emotion. Sometimes it sneaks up on you, sometimes you grow into it, but you decide whether you nurture it or not. That is a decision you remake every single day. I doubt my love for things all the time. It’s healthy, to an extent, I think. I reevaluate frequently, still I’ve rarely realise that I no longer love something. It happens, but it is rare. Love, for me, rarely dies. It can falter and fall into the background, but it rarely seizes to be. In fact, thinking about it, I’m not sure it ever has. I want to say it can sizzle away, but,,,, maybe that is wrong. Maybe it is simply dormant, or maybe it never existed at all.

The people I have loved and no longer do, is that only because I loved the idea of them I created in my own head and when the idea got disproven, the love lost its foundation? Very possibly. And the others, those who I drifted away from? I think the love I have for them may very well be dormant. If I were to meet them again, I’m sure one of two things would happen: The love would either resurface, or I’d meet them a stranger.

This also begs a relatively interesting question in my opinion. What is the difference between love and hate? If loving isn’t the same as liking, but it still a stubbornly strong feeling, could they not be confused for each other? I think so. I do not, however, think love is enough for a relationship to be healthy. Obviously. Things hurt more when it comes to something or someone you love, I’ve come to realise. And those hurt feelings can be easily associated with your beloved object, which confuses things. You can love someone while being mad at them, this much I know. You can love someone/something in the long run which you dislike in the moment. On this note, I do not believe every loving emotion needs or should go anywhere, or lead to something else. For that matter, love and a relationship are two very different things, which is important to note. One can exist without the other, and “relationship” is a very broad term. Not gonna get into that right now tho I don’t think.

I do think it’s fucking dumb to say that “love is born from hate” or “love starts with fighting” or whatever the fuck. I believe those people are bad at expressing and analysing their feelings, and that is all I have to say about that.

But back to the point. Me (likely) being aroace, I struggle to see the clear divide between different kinds of love. From my view, I’m not sure there are different ones. Different attractions, yes. Different goals and wants for different dynamics, yes. I do not want to exorcise or express my love the same way for every person, thing or concept in my life. Different kinds of love entirely? I don’t know. I’m not saying there aren’t a difference for you, just that there don’t seem to be a difference for me. Maybe you love people entirely different. Maybe it feels entirely differently. This little self analysis is just that: a self analysis. That doesn’t diminish your love, nor does it diminish mine. I am, as well, a firm believer in the fact that those two realities can coexist in different people.

I think I love people the same way I love the forests or science. Sometimes even for the same reasons, although those obviously also differ drastically.

I’d love to hear someone else’s view on this. Like, do I sound like I’ve lost the plot entirely or is this relatable. And if not, what does your world look like?? I’m genuinely curious

[feedingtheflockministry]

Coping With the Loss of a Companion Animal

“A righteous man has regard for the life of his animal, but even the compassion of the wicked is cruel.” Proverbs 12:10

Recently my wife and I had to make the very grievous decision of putting down our beloved golden retriever Honey Bear. She was a true blessing from God over the last twelve and half years. She was greatly loved by us, by extended family, and brightened up those she came in contact with in our community. I have lost other pets in the past through death and moving from place to place, but never experienced the pain and grief of losing Honey.

Upon receiving her urn and a plaster print of her paw we also received a short seven page pamphlet titled “Coping With the Loss of a Companion Animal | Support Guide for Families”. We found it to be helpful in the grieving process, and decided to share it with others that may have lost a furry family member or about to. We hope it helps in the grieving process, and our hearts go out to you in your time of loss.

Grief

Grief is a healthy and normal response to loss. Attempting to suppress feelings of grief can actually prolong the grieving process. Grief can feel like being lost. The familiar things we relied on to live each day are gone. We must find new anchors or stabilizers along the way and learn a new way of relating to the world and people around us. It is also common to replay the last moments of your pet’s life repeatedly in your mind, like a videotape that keeps playing the same scene over and over.

No one can hurry the process or provide a magic cure for grief. When grief is new, it is common to feel exhausted: physically, emotionally, and spiritually. Changes in appetite, sleeping patterns, or health are frequently reported. Those who are grieving often describe feelings of being out of control, isolation, and loneliness. Things that seemed so important before may now seem trivial. Others may experience a sense of “life isn’t fair” or being in a tunnel or fog while everyday life swirls around them.

“I HAD NEVER GONE THROUGH THE LOSS OF A PET AND IT HIT ME A LOT HARDER THAN I EXPECTED”

All of these feelings are normal and part of the grieving process, which follows no organized plan, rules, timetable, formula, or schedule. Don’t be surprised if you start to feel better, and then feel as if a wave has hit you. There will be ups and downs in the process of grieving.

The purpose of healthy grieving is not to “get over” the death of a loved one, but to integrate the experience of a pet’s death into present life. In this process, it is not unusual for certain memories of your pet to become blurred. This does not mean that you are forgetting your pet or that your love is diminished. The truth is, you will ALWAYS love this very special member of your family. The hope is that as time goes on, the feelings of sadness will become less difficult. In the beginning, you may be sad to think or talk about your companion animal. Eventually, the hope is that you will be able to talk and even smile or laugh at good memories.

“I THINK IT’S GODD TO HAVE SOMETHING TO READ BEFORE OR AFTER LOSING A PET. IT’S A REALLY NUMBING EXPERIENCE AND YOU MIGHT NOT WANT TO TALK, BUT READING SOMETHING IS QUIET AND REFLECTIVE THAT YOU CAN DO AT YOUR OWN PACE”

Guilt

Guilt and uncertainty are probably two of the most common emotions that people experience after the death of their pet. You may find yourself thinking continuously about what you perceive you could have, should have, or would have done to prevent or postpone your pet’s death Some suggestions for coping with guilt include:

1. Be truthful with yourself about why you feel guilty.

2. Write a letter to your pet expressing feelings you may be struggling with.

3. Do a reality check. Most people assume that if they had done something differently, the outcome would have been better. It’s just as likely, however, that if you had done things differently, the outcome would have been the same.

4. Remember that you are human. No one is perfect. Accepting your imperfections will aid you in working through your emotions.

5. Remember that all living things die. There is not always an answer to why bad things happen and you do not have to find someone (yourself or others) or something to blame. Realize that sometimes you are powerless and that you cannot control everything that happens to your loved ones. What you can control is how you choose to respond to the events that happen in your life

6. Try writing or talking to a trusted friend or advisor about your thoughts and feelings of guilt. Expressing your concerns in a safe and supportive environment can help you examine your emotions from a different perspective.

Seeking Support

While there is no standard duration for grief, the pain of loss normally eases with time. You can work through the process by applying healthy coping skills, such as talking with others about your memories and emotions and facing the grief, rather than trying to stay distracted or busy to avoid intense emotions. If your feelings . of sorrow or guilt have not diminished after several weeks or if they impair your ability to engage in family, social, work, or other functions, you may wish to reach out for support. Many people have found comfort in calling a pet loss support hotline, joining a pet loss support group, reading books about coping with the death of a pet, or talking with a trusted counselor or advisor.

Celebrate Your Pet’s Life

Some owners would like a way to memorialize their companion animal. The following are some ways that others have found helpful:

• Conduct a memorial service

• Keep your pet’s tags, toys, collars, bedding, etc. keep your horse’s shoes, tail, mane hair

• Save condolence cards or e-mails from friends and family

• Create a picture collage, scrapbook, story, or poem about vour pet

• If you chose cremation, you may keep the ashes in an urn or locket, or you may choose to scatter them in a place that was special to vour pet.

• Journal your pet’s story; how, when, and where you met, unique personality traits, nicknames, what you love the most, and what you’ll miss the most

• Donate time, money, or talent in your pet’s honor

“I HAVE A FRAMED PICTURE NEXT TO MY LIVING PLANTS, SO SHE IS SURROUNDED BY BEAUTY IN A SPACE THAT STILL FEELS ALIVE”

Adopting Again

The decision about bringing another animal into the home is very personal. Some families may decide not to adopt a new companion animal because of the emotional, physical, or financial demands involved with companion animal care. Others may feel the time is right to share their home and heart with another pet.

The time to consider adopting a new companion animal is when the entire family has had sufficient time to deal with the emotions of grief. Adopting too soon can lead to feelings of guilt or resentment toward the new family member. The important thing to remember is that bringing another animal into the home is not a betrayal of the one that is gone. You will never replace the one you’ve lost. You will simply be opening your home and heart to a new friend.

For families who want to consider adoption, it will be important to remember that each companion animal has a special and unique personality. Take time to discuss different sizes, breeds, or colors before making a final decision Consider the needs and temperament ol any surviving companion animals.

Losing a pet is extremely painful – you don’t have to face this alone. 24/7 grief support is available to all through our Pet Compassion Careline. CALL 1 (855) 245-8214 TO REACH A COUNSELOR TODAY.

Source at: https://www.gatewayservicesinc.com/grief-support (There are two pamphlets to choose from. This one and another titled “PRE-PLANNING AND PET AFTERCARE”.)

[bamfspock]

This is something that's become a huge issue for me as my medical conditions have progressed.

I'm semi-housebound. My ability to engage in interactions, and the world at large, is very limited. There are few times I can go anywhere w/o my wheelchair, and many times I can't go anywhere as intermittent vertigo and congitions issues simply make leaving the house unsafe. My diet is incredibly restricted. My life span will be 20 or so years shorter than it would be otherwise.

This means that when people talk about the future, about food, about activities, etc etc I generally have nothing to contribute to the conversation that won't sound depressing to others. When I do speak of it reactions involve sympathy or other reminders that what is normal for me makes others sad. It can stop a casual, upbeat conversation in it's tracks. When I use my fave coping mechanism - humor - to talk about these things, others either find it discomfiting or react with that same sympathy. When people *are* venting, even if I don't mention my reality when offering comfort the other person will often feel bad for feeling bad because they're reminded that I 'have it worse'.

As you can imagine, this can be really isolating, and compounds how isolated my health already makes me. If people are doing something that is inaccessible to me, I'll decline on the basis of being busy or fatigued because they feel bad when they realize they chose to do something I can't and didn't think of it (I run into this a lot with activities that revolve around food or drink - which a lot more do than I myself realized until I couldn't participate, e.g. eating out, holiday gatherings, meeting for a meal as part of a larger outing). I'm tired of having people always walking on eggshells around me, so I've ended up always doing it around others to avoid that.

It's a huge relief when people 'follow my lead' and treat what I say in the same way I do. If I make a joke related to my health, I love it when they approach it with humor of their own. When I state something in a matter-of-fact or casual manner and their tone matches, I feel like I can relax.

There are still of course times when *I'm* sad about it, or frustrated, or what have you, and when I express that I do appreciate words of comfort or encouragement (as long as they aren't along the lines of 'you can do it!' or 'maybe one day' or anything else that sounds positive but denies the truth of my experience). But feeling that way about my situation constantly is wearing. It just...feels bad. And so I go silent a lot, because when the people around me (which includes online interactions) react by feeling bad themselves...well, silence becomes preferable.

I say all this because I think sometimes the best way someone else can help someone whose life has been shaped my trauma (as mine has also been), illness, etc, is to approach it as that person does. Remember that, for them, it's a fact of life. It's their reality. And then treat it as such, rather than trauma dumping or Such An Unfortunate Thing.

Of course, if someone is *actually* venting that's different, and something we all need at times. Just because the content of the vent is of a particularly heavy variety doesn't diminish the struggles you feel, or require you to match that with equally 'heavy' expressions of your own feelings.

And of course, this isn't universal - everyone has different needs, and needs different things from their interpersonal relationships. Give and take isn't a one-to-one equation. For me, that's meant that just as I can't engage in the expressions of friendship most people think of when talking about what makes a good friend - I can't pick you up at the airport or help you move or even keep you company when you're going through something difficult - others can't show me friendship by including me in activities (though an invitation as a gesture is always appreciated) or baking something for me or even coming to visit (big energy zap). But when someone is hurting or recovering I can send a thoughtful gift, or even a card, and when I want to join in on the fun but vertigo prevents it they can offer me a ride, or text me photos of their pets when I'm hurting, or drop me a message with no expectation of response when I'm too ill to chat online so I know people think of me when I'm not there.

I've lost the thread a little here, but I hope this can maybe help someone better navigate their own relationships.

Having a traumatic childhood means you cannot talk even objectively about your basic foundational experiences without it being "venting", even if you're not actually venting. You just straight up have a huge chunk of your life you can't talk about, full stop, without it being trauma dumping.

And it not being socially acceptable to talk about your own childhood is super alienating. Sometimes people want to know why, and any answer you can give them is going to be off putting.

It's to the point I get irritated when something I said is framed as venting when I'm literally just talking about my life experiences, doing my best to keep emotion out of it.

[seniorhelpers07]

Greenwood-Aiken, SC Alzheimer’s Care With a Personal Touch

Facing Alzheimer’s With Support

A diagnosis of Alzheimer’s brings a wave of emotions and uncertainty for both the individual and their loved ones. In Greenwood-Aiken, SC, many families are faced with the difficult task of adjusting to a new reality. What begins as small memory lapses can gradually become a life-altering condition, affecting how someone functions, communicates, and relates to the people around them. As the condition progresses, so does the need for consistent and compassionate care.

Home Care Offers Stability

Being able to remain in one’s own home can provide a powerful sense of stability for someone with Alzheimer’s. Home is filled with memories, routines, and familiar comforts—things that can make a big difference in reducing confusion or anxiety. That’s why in Greenwood-Aiken, more families are opting for in-home Alzheimer’s care. It allows their loved one to stay in a place they know and feel secure, while still receiving professional assistance tailored to their needs.

Caregiving With Patience and Compassion

Alzheimer’s affects everyone differently. One person may experience mood swings, while another may struggle with language or decision-making. That’s why caregiving requires more than just practical skills—it requires patience, understanding, and empathy. At Senior Helpers in Greenwood-Aiken, caregivers are trained specifically in dementia care. They know how to calmly redirect during confusion, create structure through routine, and provide emotional comfort without making the individual feel diminished or frustrated.

Personalized Plans That Adjust With Time

No two cases of Alzheimer’s look exactly the same. A strong care plan takes that into account. Rather than using a one-size-fits-all approach, in-home Alzheimer’s care in Greenwood-Aiken begins with a detailed assessment of the individual’s background, habits, preferences, and current challenges. Based on that, a custom plan is created—one that can adapt as the disease progresses. This flexibility ensures that your loved one receives the right level of support at every stage.

Supporting the Entire Family

Caring for a loved one with Alzheimer’s is never just about one person—it affects the whole family. Spouses, adult children, and other relatives often find themselves stretched thin, trying to provide care while managing their own lives. It can lead to burnout, stress, and feelings of guilt. Bringing in professional support helps ease that burden. Families in Greenwood-Aiken benefit from knowing that they’re not alone. Reliable care allows them to rest, regroup, and maintain a healthy relationship with their loved one.

What to Look for in Alzheimer’s Care

When considering Alzheimer’s care in Greenwood-Aiken, SC, families should look beyond basic credentials. The quality of care often comes down to the people providing it. Key questions to ask include: Are caregivers trained specifically in dementia care? Is the care plan regularly reviewed and updated? Is there a clear system for communication with the family? At Senior Helpers, the emphasis is on consistency, reliability, and personal connection. Caregivers are matched based on compatibility, and the agency works closely with families to ensure everyone is on the same page.

Moving Forward With Confidence

Alzheimer’s may not have a cure, but that doesn’t mean families have to face it without guidance or support. Professional in-home care helps create a structured, safe, and comfortable environment for those living with the disease. It also offers families the reassurance that their loved one is in good hands. In Greenwood-Aiken, SC, Alzheimer’s care from experienced providers like Senior Helpers is giving families the tools they need to navigate this difficult journey with strength, clarity, and hope.

For more details visit us at https://www.seniorhelpers.com/sc/greenwood-aiken/services/alzheimers-dementia-care/ or call us on (864) 326-9880

[iseilio-blog]

Coping with the loss of a companion

Grief is a healthy and normal response to loss. Attempting to suppress grief can actually prolong the grieving process. Grief can feel like being lost. The familiar things we relied on to live each day are gone. It is also common to replay the last moments of your beloved pet’s life repeatedly in your mind.

No one can provide a magic cure for grief. When grief is new, it is common to feel exhausted : physically, emotionally, and spiritually. Changes in appetite, sleeping patterns, or health are frequently reported. Those who are grieving often describe feelings of being out of control, isolation, and loneliness. Things that seemed so important before may now seem trivial. Others may experience a sense of “life isn’t fair” or being in a tunnel or fog. All of these feelings are normal and part of the grieving process, which follows no organized plan or schedule. Don’t be surprised if you start to feel better, and then feel as if a wave has hit you. There will be ups and downs in the process of grieving.

The purpose of healthy grieving is not to “get over” the death of a loved one, but to integrate the experience of a companion’s death into present life. In this process, it is not unusual for certain memories of your beloved to become blurred. This does not mean that you are forgetting your best friend or that your love is diminished. The truth is, you will ALWAYS love this very special member of your family. The hope is that as time goes on, the feelings of sadness will become less difficult. Eventually, the hope is that you will be able to talk and even smile or laugh at good memories.

Consider speaking to your doctor or a mental health professional if these symptoms continue for more than a year after your beloved’s passing.

Guilt and uncertainty are probably two of the most common emotions that people experience after the death of their beloved. You may find yourself thinking continuously about what you perceive you could have, should have, or would have done to prevent or postpone your beloved’s death. Some suggestions for coping with guilt include :

1. Be truthful with yourself about why you feel guilty.

2. Write a letter to your beloved expressing feelings you may be

struggling with.

3.. Do a reality check. Most people assume that if they had

done something differently, the outcome would have

been better. It’s just as likely, however, that if you had

done things differently, the outcome would have been

the same.

4. Remember that you are human. No one is perfect.

Accepting your imperfections will aid you in working

through your emotions.

5. Remember that all living things die. There is not always

an answer to why bad things happen and you do not

have to find someone ( yourself or others ) or something

to blame. Realize that sometimes you are powerless and

that you cannot control everything that happens to your

loved ones. What you can control is how you choose to

respond to the events that happen in your life.

6. Try writing or talking to a trusted friend or advisor about

your thoughts and feelings of guilt. Expressing your

concerns in a safe and supportive environment can help

you examine your emotions from a different perspective.

While there is no standard duration for grief, the pain of loss normally eases with time. You can work through the process by applying healthy coping skills, such as talking with others about your memories and emotions and facing the grief, rather than trying to stay distracted or busy to avoid intense emotions. If your feelings of sorrow or guilt have not diminished after several weeks or if they impair your ability to engage in family, social, work, or other functions, you may wish to reach out for support. Many people have found comfort in calling a support hot line, reading books about coping with the death, or talking with a trusted counselor or advisor.

Grief Support — Gateway Services Inc. - The best in Pet Aftercare

[empathenna]

Gratitude- Empathenna

2024-07-07

Gratitude can often feel difficult, or downright impossible when faced with hardships. So it is ridiculous to look a struggling person in the face and tell them that it is all about “mindset”, “just take these few actions every day and watch it happen”. And yet, that is the single most powerful thing you can do. I will share my personal experience with depression and the day I decided I was done, I will show you how it changed my life and let you decide how growth mindset and gratitude go hand in hand, and how they have the potential to unlock your life. 

—------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It can also be impossible to see beyond what you are dealing with, no matter how many times someone says “good will come from this”, or “look for the positive”. It often feels like an endless pool of misery, heavy, all consuming. It can actually prevent us from even pulling ourselves out of that place because there is physically no alternative inside our brains. A lot of people who discuss mental health talk as if we are capable of seeing what happens next, what could come out of this experience down the road. They suggest we search for the next thing, that looking beyond will in some way will ease the burdens surrounding us. That mindset diminishes what you are facing, and can steal away the legitimacy of the experiences or circumstances. 

Instead I’d like you to embrace the events around you. It sucks, it’s painful, and it's heartbreaking, but feeling those emotions and allowing yourself to actually recognize that it genuinely does suck will help with the next steps. That’s reality, life sucks, humans are capable of both great love and great hatred, it’s the duality that comes with intelligence and free will. The feelings and pain you are dealing with are simply a human response to the circumstances or actions that have been placed upon you. And that’s okay, there’s nothing ‘wrong’ with you, you’re not ‘abnormal’ or ‘different’, you just feel it more. In the act of embracing those feelings you begin to experience acceptance, which leads to peace. 

A lot of our anxiety or depression spirals are born out of this innate feeling that something or someone is wrong, or bad, or that we react disproportionately to our situation. When we separate our feelings from our actions we can recognize that how we feel is ok, the things that make us feel a certain way, happen because our brains have been rewired, or trained in a way to keep us safe. When we think through all the options available, or obsessively worry over a scenario, we prepare ourselves for the worst. We ‘pre-experience’ the terrible things, and then ‘re-experience’ them when our suspicions or worries are confirmed by someone else’s behavior or a set of forced circumstances. Any good or hope is crushed from the get go, any desire or true effort to do better or search for better. 

For me it was a decision that shattered my life, made me question the core of who I was, my values and beliefs had been thrown out the window and I was a shell of a human being. I looked in the mirror and didn’t even recognize myself, I asked how I had gotten where I was and completely broke. Personally, this was my come to Jesus moment, this is where I gave up on this world and this earth. This is where I saw all the cruelty and pain and greed that urges these negative emotions on, this is when I stared into the darkest parts of my soul and decided I would not succumb anymore. Because I am a Christian, I turned to God for this- decided that nothing on this earth was worth the pain and suffering that it has caused. An interesting duality here- imagine simultaneously recognizing that this planet and the ‘things’ on it bring us the happiness we are supposed to have while also seeing that chasing that happiness inevitably ends in pain and suffering. 

What a dark place to be in, what a sad realization, but will you be cynical? Or will you choose differently? Will you contribute to that darkness, those negative spaces in our lives, or will you choose to do better? Be better? Give love, not spite?

I’m not saying it will be easy, I’m not saying that one day you will wake up with the sudden ability to overcome all your difficulties, struggles and traumas. Hell, I will forever rage an internal war against the things I’ve taught myself to cope with prior circumstances. You must desire to learn, it is a choice of perception and mindset. Everything we face on this earth is an opportunity, a chance to see, learn, understand and love. Every interaction we experience holds lessons and blessings in disguise and can add an incredible depth to our perspective. I wish to encourage you to approach the world with a childlike wonder, in a Christians case a childlike faith. Do this and you may just find that love, joy and gratitude exist at the core of anything and everything. 

It seems silly, gratitude in the face of everything, and it will always be an uphill battle. But you must practice, exercise it like a muscle. Each time you successfully think of what good can come out of an event rather than the bad, you retrain your brain on outlook, perception. Start small, clean water, a bed, a roof, I can practically feel you rolling your eyes through the screen “Those are basic needs, why should I say thank you?” I won’t go down the route of “starving African children”, but I will turn the question around on you. Why wouldn’t you say thank you? Why wouldn’t you be grateful that you can drink water from the tap, or have cozy blankets? Why don’t we celebrate and enjoy the small luxuries of life, the little things that play essential roles in our day to day? Look internally, are you caring? Kind? Compassionate? What are the attributes of yourself you are proud of, and how can you exercise them to benefit you and your life? Why shouldn’t you celebrate the parts of yourself and your life that are so beautiful? 

If we only focus on what exactly we are experiencing, what is happening and could happen or has happened, when we spiral with our thoughts and feelings we miss the depth and prosperity interlaced through every event in our lives. We focus on the what, when, where and forget how much more vibrant our lives are when we not only look for good (instead of searching for ways it could go poorly), but also embrace it and give back to the world. 

To me, we are taught that we must always want more, chase more, peace and stillness starts with gratitude and acceptance of the place we are in at our current time- or any point in our life. Tomorrow has enough worries, trouble not on what you cannot control and instead focus on what you can control. You can control the age old saying ‘you give what you get’ rings true, and you can say that up until now maybe you were giving what you were getting, but this works in the reverse as well. You experience negativity, you return with negativity, and get more negativity gifted to you. At some point you must choose to break the cycle yourself and start giving something positive to your life and the world. You are exactly where you are meant to be at any given time, because life is a series of puzzles that in the end all fit together. So if it feels like you’re missing a piece, or like your puzzles are all shades of gray and muddled, give it time for new pieces to come into your life and fall into place or for a wave of relief to wash over you and lift the clouds. Alternatively reach for that relief by practicing gratitude for the things you do see, understand or have. Every tragedy or traumatic experience has only made you stronger, because you are still here. There is some part of you, big or small, that desires for better, longs for there to be a reason or purpose to the suffering. It is too easy to wall yourself off, become cold and withdrawn from the world. It is easy to decide you are done fighting for love and choose loneliness over community because people have hurt you. It is easy to be cold, jaded and cynical. These are traits that make us feel strong, safe and protected. But you starve yourself of passion, fire, love, joy, laughter and frankly, life. It takes a far deeper strength of self and is incredibly admirable to stare into the cruelty inflicted upon you and choose to be better, do better. Choose to give love and not contribute to suffering- whether it is yours or others.

[jee4682]

1

Growing up i didn't really have the desire to transition, to look more feminine. I was adamant on finding a great, genuine love where he will accept me the way i am. How i look, how i talk, how i present myself. I believed that such love does exist, i just have to wait for it.

During my teenage years, i wasn't actively looking for love even though i was surrounded by couples and flings and romance all of the freakin time. I knew it is a different struggle for me to find something they easily have or acquire so ,i decided to wait for it. I decided to let it come to me because i had it in my mind that i was somehow special and that i have a lot of love to give so anyone who would choose me would just be downright lucky. I was confident of myself. I had a sky-rocketing self esteem. I was happy with myself and how i looked even though its far from society's standards when it comes to looking for partners. I was contented and at peace.

Now that i've seen and have been immersed in the reality of the world and how it revolves and how it works, i don't think a love so great is even possible. I didn't even think a great deal of self worth, self confidence and self esteem would be diminished by it's cruel reality. There is too much superficial basis on this world that not even a good personality, good sense of humor and empathy can overcome. It is a sad reality and there is nothing we can do to change it.

I only ever had one lover and that happened because yes, i settled. I felt like if i did't take this opportunity of love (was it really though?),i would lose it forever and that for people like me, it only comes once in a blue moon so i took it despite everything about him went against my personal standards. we had good moments but that always happens when we're alone. when other people are present, we just looked like friends and i went along with it cause i know I am or i will be the cause of his humuliation. I swallowed all of my principles just to feel loved and all i got was betrayal in the end.

Fast forward to one or two years later, i found myself on a dating app. Boo is it's name. For a while it was meh. Just shallow conversations that you know will never elevate into something real. Not until i met him, James (youbin lee). The initial talk felt very different than all the other people i talked to on the app. We bonded over life's miseries and picking up our little poisons (as we call alcohol) just to drown out the misery and the loneliness. The whole time we were talking felt so different and unexplainable. He understood what i was going through and i understood his stuff as well. We'd have moments of epiphany. The "oh, i never thought about it that way". He gave me perspective and honestly, hope. I found myself craving for the feeling i get when we talked and it was great for a while. We'd talk frequently and would not run out of things to say. I'd even drunk text him all the cringey thoughts in my head and he would just laught it off and find it adorable. I was madly inlove with this man. so much so that i associated a whole band, a whole genre of music to his memory and how he made me feel. Even my friends followed suit. Everytime we would listen to Wave to Earth, his name would somehow slither it's way to the moment and I was happy about it. I felt seen and understood. He knew about what i am from the start but he did't cared to clarify it because as per his words "he liked talking to me so much".

several months passed and all of a sudden he disappeared. Without any explaination without any warning. I waited, i sent him messages even though i know he wasn't going to respond. I was devastated, the only person that i felt who saw me and understood me suddenly disappeared.

[random-thoughts-and-words]

Title: "An Interview with A Black Man: Reality and Truth Behind the Colour"

As I sit on this weathered bench, the sun's warm embrace is no different on my skin than it is on any other. Yet, some passersby seem to think otherwise. They cast glances, some filled with disdain, others with pity. But I hold my ground. I may be a coloured boy, but that doesn't diminish my right to this spot, nor does it negate my journey through education.

Growing up in Houston, Texas, being coloured meant facing a barrage of injustices. It meant enduring the taunts of white children, their cruelty excused as discipline. But I refuse to be defined by their narrow perceptions. I bleed the same red blood, feel the same pain, and possess the same intellect, regardless of the opportunities denied to me, with the silver spoon that you had since birth while I had my own two hands to keep me alive.

Hate was a lesson ingrained in us, a bitter reality we learned to navigate from a young age. We were segregated, profiled, and victimized, but we persisted. We fought for the basic rights denied to us: equal access to facilities, I worked the same job as you and the same hours and yet still, I don't get paid as much because, “I am coloured and i don't have to get paid the same wages for my labour”. Yet, even when we proved ourselves capable, we were met with scepticism and disdain.

The fight isn't over. Despite the passage of time, discrimination still rears its ugly head. Black folks struggle to secure loans, burdened by unfounded suspicions of criminality. It's a reality we face daily, a reminder that justice remains elusive.

But I refuse to succumb to despair. I carry within me the hopes and dreams of my ancestors, the very hope and dream of the slave, the resilience of those who came before me. I will continue to fight, to strive for fairness and equality, because we are all one people, bound by our shared humanity, no matter how little some may have or how narrow some's opinions may be.

So, let it be known: the colour of my skin does not diminish the gravity of the challenges I face. I may not have the most prestigious job, but I have dignity, I have resilience, and I have the unwavering determination to create a better world for us all. I am the coloured boy, but I have the same red that flows through your veins and as Maya Angelo once said, “You may write me down in history, with your bitter twisted lies, you may tread me in the very dirt but still like dust, I’ll rise.”

Let it not be forgotten for their legacy lives on.

[alm0st-sentient]

i don't find pleasure in the way people perceive my pleasure?? In my sexuality and what they assume or imagine me to be and the way it interacts with my nature, at least in their perception. I don’t know how better to explain it. I don’t agree with the way people see me or interact with me but I can’t persuade a way to be respected. I find little control in the way I act around people or what I’m trying to present.

I only can show as much as someone is willing to tolerate and I don’t feel sexy in the way they perceive me and that’s not to say that I don’t feel sexy, I just find my sexy nature to be disregarded, misunderstood, and unacknowledge for a more digestible and tolerable cardboard cut out of my full opportunity.

I often feel minimized and underestimated, and inhibited by the same double standards that claim I am too boring or inferior to be paid any mind. The ways I am extreme and shiny and brave are deviant and punishable, befitting an insensible child, but the ways I am compliant are predictable pussy-footed, and yielding for the acceptance I will not receive.

A lot of my connections’ concerns and mine differ and rarely can my opinion have a different or feasibly greater perspective or equal validity, that my ideas and experience does not deserve equally respectful contemplation.

I struggle to enjoy the conflicts that diversify my experience. I find others lack a compassion that is great enough to harm connection to me beyond what criteria allows others to be superior in their discomfort of my existence; fitting a standard that means nothing to my own personal values or that I wouldn’t have agreed with on a fundamental level for my own experience. I am often wrong, misinformed and clueless, unable to fathom any feeling and struggles they have gone through but that I am prevented from investigating for my own personal decision in how something would be suitable for me.

Not that I seem to have enough space to contemplate my values as a deserving unique presence on earth, or to apply my worldview without it being admonished by uninformed and unrelating experiences that perceive their reality, comforts, desires, and worldviews as harmless, lawful, and the only correct experience instead of a piece of advice about how they received that same experience and how it affected them personally.

Our judgements on others are so unreasonable, personal, and without consideration or interest in the other’s bases or fascinations. We don’t understand others but don’t choose to lean in to learn more when it’s foreign and undiscussed to ourselves or possibly unexplored, or if we just ‘know more.’

when people talk to me it’s often as if I couldn’t possibly understand or have means to contribute in discussion. I believe myself to be a kind, patient, and tentative soundboard as well as a good sidekick but that some don’t view me as an equal main character to be defined, but an npc of value to be assumed. A manic pixie dream girl. A supporter role, and a lesser opinion but convenient and beneficial vessel to wield.

Ick. Anger. I cannot feel understood. I will not feel seen. My appreciation is in my value and worth and not my awesomely unique experience. People are worse the more I understand how silly logic can be and how fickle humans refuse to believe they are. It makes me so afraid of rejection but makes me feel so misunderstood. I am disconnected from my body and my sense of self and I am so dissatisfied with how others interpret me and what things they choose what parts to refuse to consider that may just simply deny their concept of me or make them uncomfortable in their own and diminishing the best attributes of me, in turn valuing superficial qualities that only make me small and easy to swallow.

[ecstaesykiss]

I’m seeing this weird narrative pop up again—that Taehyung’s solo fanbase wants him to go into acting or modeling instead of supporting his music. And honestly, I find that both insulting and completely disconnected from reality.

Layover was a critically acclaimed, beautifully crafted album, and his fanbase has supported it relentlessly. No constant exposure. No over-promotion. And yet it charted globally, swept awards, and pulled in hundreds of millions of streams. That didn’t happen by accident. That happened because his fans showed up for the music—not just for him, but for what he created.

This accusation that his fanbase doesn’t appreciate his artistry just because they also acknowledge his interest in acting or modeling is ridiculous. We know Taehyung is multi-talented. We’ve seen his love for cinema, his eye for aesthetics, his unique storytelling through visuals and expression. Recognizing that doesn’t mean we’re abandoning his music—it means we respect his range.

People act like bringing up his interest in other art forms is a betrayal of BTS or his musical path. But his fans aren’t pushing him into anything. They’re simply advocating for his freedom—to choose whatever direction he wants, without sabotage or manipulation from his company, and without judgment from a fandom that treats everything he does like a deviation from some imaginary script.

If anything, it’s the fandom at large that struggles to accept that his growth might look different. They diminish acting and modeling as "lesser" art forms, as if they don’t require talent, discipline, or vision. That’s not about his fans. That’s about a fandom afraid of evolution—afraid of the members stepping fully into themselves.

Taehyung’s fans are asking for very basic things: fair treatment, proper visibility, protection from hate, and the freedom to grow. They’re not rejecting his music. They’re the ones carrying it when the company doesn’t. So maybe the question shouldn’t be what his fans are doing, but why he even needs that kind of protection in the first place.

anyways ready for them to become workwife and husband

people wanting him to act doesn’t mean they don’t want music from him, the two aren’t mutually exclusive, but i know tkkrs are worried which is why they’re lashing out now and making it seem like tae’s fans don’t like his music just because they also want actor tae.

he himself said he wants to act in his 30s and told directors he’s open to their scripts, so of course his true fans would be excited at the possibility, unlike shippers who only think about their sunken ship and how they can make everything tae does about someone else

I don’t think they’re mutually exclusive too, I think that right after coming back there are more chances of getting new music than a full blown acting project, but if he’s gonna act and get casted by Guadagnino two days after discharge I would be the happiest too. Like I only want him to do everything that makes him happy and I’ll be happy too

[imlimitlesss]

MAKE LAWS FOR YOURSELF. Stop the overthinking. Inspired by @kristheassumtionqueen

:༅｡♡｡༅:*･ﾟﾟ･⭑

Bro, if you struggle a little with overthinking in the beginning I highly suggest you make rules for yourself, laws as god, about what you are nervous is contradicting. Ofc there is no such thing as this, however writing everything down as an official document of laws and signing it, has seriously helped me. And it’s fun! You can choose your colors and decorate however you want. First I started off with an intro that looks a little something like this,

As the god, the creator of my reality, everything written on this page becomes true in an instant. They forever remain the truth until only I, say otherwise. These laws take effect immediately, in every dimension and in every reality, in all of the multiverse as soon as my e signature is written on the page, and this is because I am in full control. Absolutely nothing can take away the power of this document and of my laws, even typos because I know that I am on the pedestal here. New rules may be added at any time and still have the same effects as previous laws.

Great! So you have your intro, now time for the rules. What is limiting you? NAH NAH, No more hun, get that out. YOU ARE LIMITLESS, here are some of my laws as an example. (I know it may seem silly and obvious but like I said, writing really helps, it’s like a placebo that it sets it in stone, even though I know I am the power that does that.) Here are some examples of laws that were created to get rid of the overthinking.

A deadline is a deadline, it does not matter how close or far the deadline is because, I am the manipulator of time anyways. What I want must be mine either before or after the deadline. (I just love how this rhymes too LOL)

Negative thoughts, unhelpful thoughts, intrusive thoughts, overthinking, resistance, limiting beliefs, have no power. Only I choose what I give power to, nothing can diminish my manifestations, that is not possible.

Even though there are some rules on this document that are similar, that is totally ok. There is no such thing as laws contradicting or canceling each other out. That is a limiting belief and as I have already stated, limiting beliefs do not hold any power whatsoever. They rarely occur anyways.

Pressure from anyone does not affect my manifestations and what I want. Even pressure from myself may only aid or maintain the manifestation.

YAY! You’ve created your own set of laws. That is that, nothing can change them, (unless you choose differently at some point ofc) Some of them may seem silly and obvious but who gives a shit when you’re out there living your dream life right?! Now, all that is left to do is sign! Get your favorite color, or font, if it’s electronic, and write your signature!!!! You can come up with a cute catchy line or just sign your name! This is what mine was…

On the only pedestal is where I ______ and only I, ______ remain.

After this you are no longer allowed to limit yourself, and you don’t even have to worry about it because you just ELIMINATED those unhelpful thoughts, they are powerless now. So go have fun, get what you want.

[autistic-puffin]

THANK YOU it is consuming my entire brain

amazing i cannot wait to see them

i did in fact find it thank you sadlkfjasklfasadfas

i feel like i have probably not had a single thought about this show that has not already been articulated better by someone else, but i will still say some of my thoughts

things i keep coming back to: jack/anne/max, the DECISIONS AND CHOICES, the inevitability related to all of them, and monstrousness

jack/anne/max: this is huge to me on multiple levels, partially because as individuals i adore all of them and they're all so ALIVE and compelling and complex and nuanced and like all of their outward presentations (of gender and of other things) and their ways of communicating and fighting and not fighting and all of the above are just so so so good and delicious and they fit together so fascinatingly and i love it. and also as a queer man in a long-term QPR with a woman, idk i felt so, seen? i loved how undefined jack and anne were beyond "partners" and i also love that max's importance to anne isn't diminished by jack's importance to her and how they all respect each other's significance to one another by the end. having encountered so many people that do not understand our relationship and want to make sense of it in terms of either romantic or platonic etc, seeing a relationship more similar to my own than possibly any other i've seen, a relationship that wasn't questioned or even properly defined or picked apart, it just IS and is given enormous weight in the story,,,, that is so much to me. and also all of them are very sexy and fun and that's cool too.

DECISIONS AND CHOICES: i mentioned this above but i am so so so so so so obsessed with allllll of the tought and challenging decisions and choices made in this show by the characters. and how much all of them MADE SENSE. even if you wouldn't have made that choice (though as flint says at the end of season 4, he doesn't honestly know what he would've done had he been in silver's position), you can completely understand WHY the character is doing what they're doing, even as you're going BESTIE PLEASE STOP. the characterizations are so well-established and developed over time throughout the show and it is just HHHHHHH *chef's kiss*. and they keep getting thrown into these awful dilemmas and debates and having to make awful choices. and i love it. i think this show does a really really good job of holding all of the moral ambiguity at once. and i think that freedom to not "justify" horrible actions really allows for so much INTERESTING storytelling as we explore the reasons behind all of these different actions.

inevitability: this is very much related to choices and the tragedy of knowing these characters will always make these decisions. eleanor will always choose nassau over max in that moment. flint cannot stop fighting his war. silver cannot lose madi. there is no other way for it to go forward because these characters will always make these decisions. and many of them are even aware of this!!!! the other inevitability is knowing the historical reality of this period and region. and knowing that no matter how hard they try, they will not win this war. the conclusion is already known and so we know all of this struggling will be to some extent in vain. and it is SOOOOOOO. so. hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

monstrousness: i am a simple queer and trans person, i enjoy my fictional explorations of monstrousness as much as the next queer and trans person. when i read Susan Stryker's "My Words to Victor Frankenstein above the Village of Chamounix" 6-ish years ago it rearranged my brain forever. as expected, the discussions of monsters in this show were very YES THAT YES to me. both in being assigned monsters in order to fit the narrative of civilization and in deciding to become the monster. i think for me, watching this show in 2024, it was hitting on the whole "the more things change, the more they stay the same" thing. on how i as a trans person with my horomones and my surgery am one of the monsters that needs to be eradicated, how my queer relationship is hated by my partner's family, how all of my trans siblings are either demonized or infantilized and how we're targeted and fetishized and accused of being monsters. and to some extent this has always been a thing, we all know this. but in this particular moment in time, watching this show about this group of people deemed as too other and monstrous to be allowed into "polite society" and hearing about how these monsters are necessary to maintain the fiction that this oppressive empire is necessary,,,,,,idk i guess it just hits pretty hard.

show of all time and all that etc. also flint looks SO good covered in blood that i am like. mildly concerned for myself.

@autistic-puffin

WELCOME TO THE OTHER SIDE OF BLACK SAILS

it's so funny because literally yesterday i liked a whoooole bunch of black sails posts i'm about to queue up!

alas, my blog is in disuse, i ended up not posting as much as i would have if i just used this one, so i've started going back to here -- this was back when i was trying to wrangle my way out of being a multifandom space (lol can u imagine). BUT like i said... mre black sails being queued on this blog as we speak!