#So i should know some things but i don't because i forgot
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5 ways to evaluate if you should date a guy
It’s a man that you can look at and think: I’d be proud to introduce them to my family
While talking he demonstrated to be a studious, hardworking man and having goals
He showed interest in you in a respectful manner
He showed to be willing to do his masculine role for this date
He’s not married
Do you know what’s the issue?
Sometimes you go out with someone just to fill a hole, some emotional need, to have "something going on in your life"... but then you end up stuck in a situation that is often completely uncomfortable:
At the same time as you want to leave, you feel like you should be more participative.
You are jot enjoying the conversation, and you can't find a way to leave.
You don’t even want to kiss the boy, but you drink too much and loses your judgment, "since he's already there"!
You doesn't want to go any further on dating him ... but you are afraid of his reaction.
Have you ever been through something like this?
So you know how you get home... once again feeling like crap.
Regretful for the time lost, for what she did and even feeling disgusted with herself.
Do you know why this happens?
Because you don't establish MINIMUM criteria to decide whether or not you're going to invest your time in a person you're meeting.
You don't know what you're looking for - and then anything will do.
If you have an intense desire, a fire... you run after a guy who is exactly everything you tell yourself you should avoid.
Women are naturally attracted to looks and good conversation - but you know that's not enough. This is not what you want for your life. So understand something simple: you need rules. Self-established rules that protect you from your own base motivations. I brought here 5 simple rules. If you follow them, I guarantee that you will get rid of most of the problems you experience when searching for a man in your life, and I will go further: I guarantee that the chances of you entering into a completely disordered relationship with the same problems as always drop by around 80%. Does it make sense to you? Tell me if you have ANY other rules that I forgot Or how have things been for you who live without these rules...
#personal#level up#femininity#personal development#feminine#traditional gender roles#feminine energy#glow up#glowing up#dating#level up journey#levelling up
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Just A Taste (Sylus Fanfic)
(Part 1. This is my first piece of fanfic. Be patient with me pls 🙂↕️)
Mature (18+) (eh it’s not too bad.. yet lol)
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MC point of view:
7pm on the dot. Man I am so tired.. I think to myself while brushing my teeth. I dry my mouth and look forward. Slightly reddish pink eyes stare back at me. This had been my third day in a row working a 12 hour shift. I make my way out the bathroom and plop onto my soft, queen sized bed. Ahh.. finally! This might be the earliest bedtime for me in a while.
I lie my head down and before I know it.. I am out. No sleepy bear tea needed. Perfect slumber.
*Phone Rings* My eyes flick open. My phone.. I squint in pain of being awoken so suddenly and see my screen lit up with the name "Sylus". Oh god. What does he want? What time is it even? I reluctantly pick up the device and press accept.
"Hello? Can I help you?"
S: "Excuse me? I am at your door. Care to let me in, sweetie?"
"Sylus, why are you at my door? Is it not the middle of the night?"
S: "It's 9pm. Is my little kitten losing track of time?"
"First off, I am not your "kitten." Second, I was taking a nap so I only have half a brain cell working at the moment. But besides that, you still haven't answered my question."
S: "You told me I could drop off Mephisto so you could take care of him while I am gone on my business trip next week. This is usually the time I am up so I didn't see a problem. "
Ah shit, I forgot I promised him.. The one thing I actually said I would do for this obnoxious man.
"Right. Okay Sylus, I will be right there."
I roll my eyes. It's not that I hate Sylus or anything.. I just am wary towards him. He is cocky, a smartass, and to be frank.. I just don't know him well enough. I will say, he is very handsome. But that means nothing to me if he can't be trusted. I am just doing him this solid because, well.. I love Mephisto! I am an animal lover. Plus, if I can get Sylus to trust me, I can get some useful information regarding Onychinus.
I quickly switch from my oversized tee and shorts to a cute lounge set. A light lavender color sits pretty and hugs my body. The material is soft and thin. I spray some vanilla scented perfume on my neck and glide my favorite lip oil on. Why am I getting all dolled up?
I pause to ponder about the sudden question. Well.. why was I? Why should I care about what he thinks? Sure, he is attractive but.. Ugh. Need to hurry. No time for thinking. I shake my head and make my way to the entrance.
A pair of crimson eyes meet mine as I open my apartment door. "Well hello", he says softly. I slightly tense up as I see his eyes wander downwards, reading my body. I smile inside, feeling a small victory. Okay, maybe I secretly desired his eyes on me, at least to admire my outfit. I try to be collected with my exterior. A moment passes and I decide he has stared long enough. "Coming inside, or did you come just to admire the doorway?" I ask teasingly. He scoffs playfully and walks inside my apartment.
My living room was small but cozy. The couch was big enough for me to sleep on and lounge around on days where I couldn't be bothered to do anything else. I had plenty of throw blankets ready and dim lights that gave the room a warm glow. Sylus sets Mephisto’s cage on the coffee table gently. I find a fall-scented candle I want to use and I grab my trusty lighter. As I get ready to light the flame, I see Sylus taking his leather jacket off. I steal a quick peek at his arms. He was a big guy. Standing at 6'2, his presence alone towered me. His arms.. My oh my. Toned.. Strong. His hands smooth and well kept, but durable. He can probably lift me onto his shoulders with no prob- "(y/n)?", Sylus suddenly says, breaking the glorious trance my mind had engulfed itself onto his body. "(y/n) are you going to light that candle? Or am I distracting you?" He asks with a smirk. I feel my cheeks warm up, and a ping of annoyance heats me. Why did I let myself get caught gawking? Shaking off my embarrassment, I light the candle and meet Sylus at the couch. "Would you like anything to drink? Water? Tea?", I ask. I am a nice host after all, even to annoyingly hot men. "How nice of you to offer sweetie, but no thanks." He says. I nod in response and have a seat alongside him, keeping quite a bit of space between us.
Sylus sits back on the couch. Confident and relaxed. He is wearing a somewhat loose. white button up shirt. A closer look reveals expensive, soft fabric that must’ve been handmade. His wardrobe cannot be cheap. A mist of clean smelling soap pings my nose. Wow, he smells amazing. I suddenly feel my stomach turn in a way that makes my skin feel flushed. Does he know how deadly handsome he is? I notice his hair is quite messy as well, not in the usual parted and neatly styled way, but his bangs laid tousled on his forehead instead. He must’ve showered right before coming.
Interesting.
"So.. Mephisto. How long will I be watching after him?" I ask as I peek down at the medium-sized metal cage Mephisto sits peacefully in. His eyes are closed and he seems to be sleepy. How cute!
S: "Not too long. I will be away for about 4 days on my trip so it shouldn't be too bad. He is not a high maintenance crow by any means. I brought his special food and the serving instructions are labeled on the back. "
"Great! Should be no issue then."
The room falls quiet for a moment. Sylus looks down, almost seems to be lost in thought for a second.
My face changes to a somewhat confused look. Why is he so lost in thought?
"Well.. if that's all you need from me.." I say, trying to close this awkward gap in our conversation.
Sylus looks up at me for a few seconds without saying anything.
"What? Something on my face?" I ask somewhat nervously.
S: "You are quite beautiful."
"I-"
My face feels flushed. Oh no. Did he actually just say that? What is he playing at? I am so confused.
S: "Aw, am I making you blush? Kitten, do you enjoy receiving compliments?"
I don't know whether to feel turned on or offended. Maybe both. Who does this guy think he is? He is rude one day.. obnoxious another.. now he is calling me beautiful? And calling me kitten?
" Why do you call me that?" I say, taking a sip of water. Praying my face will stop flashing red.
Sylus slightly changes his seating position, his legs spread out as he sits back further on his side of the couch. "Would like a different name?”, he questions with a hint of amusement displayed on his face.
"Like what? Is my first name not enough?"
S: "I prefer names that describe exactly what you are."
"And what am I?" I ask boldly.
Sylus chuckles at my snappy attitude. "A feisty kitten who tries to deny her feelings for me,” he replies.
I laugh in surprise and am somewhat shocked at how ridiculous this conversation has turned.
"W-What? What makes you come to that conclusion? " I ask while closing my eyes. My cheeks aren’t calming down, and I am getting annoyed at how this man is triggering me so easily.
S: "I see the way you look at me, dollface. The way you sneak peeks at me when you think I don't notice. How your thighs rub together when I inch near you on this couch." He smirks.
I stay quiet. He’s right. And I hate him for that. My body instinctively wants him. I feel a warm ping of adrenaline in my core and down lower, a wetness makes its presence known.
"So?" I state quietly, gazing at him with an unsureness.
He inched closer to me and slowly rose his hand to my cheek. I gasped, my body paralyzed by nerves and butterflies making laps in my tummy. We locked eyes and for a second, I thought, I would do anything for this man. Why, why, why? I shouldn't feel this way. Is he just that physically attractive? Am I just really horny? I didn't have time to contemplate. Sylus was already inches near my face.
S: "Say you don't want this."
From here, I can feel his minty breath against my face. Ugh he smelled delicious. Sweet, expensive cologne radiating off his clothes and into the air. My lower lady parts pinged with heat and throbbed in desire. Just his presence alone turned me on.. But he could never know that. This is wrong.
"I-I don't want this…" I say while looking down.
S: "Liar." His gentle hand on my right cheek turned into a cuff, holding against my chin. He made my head look up at him. My eyes widen a bit at the sudden boldness of his touch.
S: "Now kitten, you can sit here and try to play with me.. but I don't buy it."
I look away. He is right. I am lying. But is this a good idea? I don't even know this man's intentions. Can I trust him? All I know is my body yearns for him.
S: "Look at you.. blushing. Like a little schoolgirl. Not so great at playing poker face, kitten." He smirks and lets my face go.
He quickly leans in closer and is now centimeters from my face. He looks into my eyes and traces down to my lips.
S: "Just a taste? Don't make me beg now, sweetie."
I lose my breath at his demanding comment and notice my underwear is soaked. His voice.. his eyes. At this point.. I can't fight the urge anymore.
I give a bashful nod and bite my lower lip.
Sylus leans in and his mouth meets mine. His lips were like honey, making me sugar wasted. Sweet and surprisingly gentle kisses from a bold and confident man. It was almost like he was teasing me, only giving me 50% of his energy. Each kiss was a half-written love letter crafted just for me and left me wanting my complete ending. He gently tugged at my lip with his teeth and his long tongue danced with mine, giving me just enough to keep me drunk. He held my warm face and the back of head, taking control but never overwhelming me. I wanted more. This felt too good.
I quietly moaned in his mouth, hoping he would get the hint to take things further. He grazed my hair with his right hand and gathered some in his palm. He pulled the bit that he had gently, making me gasp and our lips broke free. The slight tug felt so good. Any bit of touch from him was making me melt.
S: "Not so fast kitten, I only said a taste."
"Why?" I ask, demanding to know.
He smirks and satisfaction radiates across his face. "Ah, my naughty kitten likes what she tastes. How cute. Unfortunately, I don't go any further than that. Unless we are dating."
I am puzzled by his comment. Is he asking me out right now? He is kind of putting me on the spot. Am I assuming correctly?
"Is this your unique way of asking me on a date?" I questioned, afraid of his answer. Part of me hopes he will randomly say he does in fact want me. My mind is no longer rational.
S: "And if it is? What is your answer, sweetie? Yes? No? Maybe so?"
-Part 2 to be continued-
#lads#lads sylus#love and deepspace sylus#sylus x mc#sylus#sylus x reader#sylus x you#smut#smut with plot#smuttish#sylus smut#lnds sylus#lnds mc#lnds smut#lads smut
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i took a few liberties but... Sunday-inspired playlist!
some highlights:
master of the heavenly yard (off-vocal) (mothy/akuno-P)
portrait of the pirate F (hitoshizuku-p)
rock in god's shoe (sushi soucy)
worst case scenario (the hoosiers)
but never a key (dirt poor robins)
hello my old heart (the oh hellos)
rule #35 - microphone (fish in a birdcage)
into the unknown (over the garden wall)
collared (vane lily)
taixu (sasakure.uk , lasah)
ship in a bottle (fin)
a couple ender lilies OSTs
a few omori OSTs
a few hsr (penacony) OSTs
#sunday hsr#honkai star rail#hsr#art#character playlist#my posts#still a lot to do with this one!! nitw osts are planned to be added and probably some crypt of the necrodancer as well!#but. actually I'm pretty proud of it. some things don't QUITE fit. for example i added two songs titled Runs In The Family#just because. of the title. they don't quite fit him but. i wanted them in there#anyway feel free to steal this selection for your own playlists or whatever! but id love to know if anyone likes these because#character playlist curation is my passion :)#ok i think that's enough tags so it should be safe to just tag:#sunday#since i use that for organization on this blog but i don't want to mess with people just searching for a weekday#idk why you would. but. you know#ALSO I WANTED TO ADD ''FAITHLESS'' FROM POCKET MIRROR BUT THE POCKET MIRROR OSTS AREN'T ON SPOTIFY. SOBBING#hsr spoilers#I ALMOST FORGOT THAT ONE#sorry guys
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I occasionally wish to reach out to old friends/acquaintances I haven't spoken to since high school/some other even earlier time in my life, but I have SOOO little social energy even for required tasks (like making dr phone calls or etc), I never have any leftover for extra ones, and it would be very odd to message someone I haven't spoken to in like 5 years out of the blue but then take 4 entire months to respond back lol.. My natural curiosity with nostalgia/collecting details of the past/etc. (literally if I were born a little earlier I would definitely do scrapbooking or something lol) is very strong, but, alas, not strong enough to beat out the Social Issues Demons apparently
#facebook always does that 'here's a post from this day 8 years ago' thing. and I see old comments interacting#with people and it's so like.. OOOOO~~ where are they now?? what's going on? how much have they changed as people?#how much are they the same? this is fascinating. i should contact them!!' but then it's like... take that to it's logical conclusion though#you would contact them and then IF they even responded it would take you 80 years to respond and then they would#think there was something wrong or that you were trying to be insulting or something. To contact anyone I need to include an 85 page#disclaimer of all of my social issues & mental illness things. 'If i take 3 weeks to reply I promise it has nothing to do with u' etc lol#THIS is why more people need to be into phone calls/voice calls/some form of audio real time communication/etc.#I think one of the main things that's hard about messaging through text for me is it's so unscheduled and open ended#(plus it takes forever if you're talking about anything in detail and gets very long very quickly)#because like you can send a message and then just get a reply whenever. and then you're expected to reply back whenever#so it's like you never know when the response will come or when a new obligation to reply can come up? so it's like this sudden thing with#no outline?? if that makes sense. whereas a phone call is very like 'hello let's schedule a call from 10am - 2pm on thursday'. And you know#EXACTLY when the interaction will start and EXACTLY when it will end and you can plan around it in your schedule easily.#I have the reverse thing of a lot of people (how people don't pick up phone calls/hate calls/only text)#I would literally talk on the phone with a stranger. I would have a discord voice chat with someone I barely know.#if someone I hardly even remember from elementary school asked to have a voice call with me out of nowhere I would do it.#but if a stranger MESSAGED me?? or someone I barely know sent me a TEXT or something?? I will never reply probably#It's just too vague and weird. and you can't read voice tone over text. and the interaction could last forever with no clear end#point and etc. etc. But a call is like. set. established. clear boundaries. you can read the flow of conversation better. rapport. etc. etc#I get that I guess people feel more anonymous or distanced over text?? but you can have fake phone numbers on the computer. or do like disc#rd calls. or zoom without a camera or etc. etc. Also the distance that's present in text is BAD distance because it just means that tone is#not conveyed properly and you will never truly get a sense of the person's conversational vibe or mannerisms or how well you really click.#ANYWAY ghgjh...... I'm so so so interested in concepts of like.. How did that one kid I used to talk to in elementary school#but then they moved away in 5th grade - how did they end up? what are they doing now?? etc. etc. Like despite the severe social anhedonia#and general lack of connection with others I'm just really fascinated in like.. idk. the human development of it all and like#the concept of how we're actually a million different people through the course of our lives ever evolving in different iterations and etc.#PLUS again. i love nostalgia. sometimes old peple you know might remember a shared memory or can tell you about something you forgot#or etc. like it's SUCH A COOL THING in CONCEPT but I am too socially inept generally speaking lol. which people I still talk to today are#familiar with my 'phone call once every few months' communication style. but strangers would just be like... wtf. And I don't blame them#Sure I literally cannot change the physical health + brain issues i have - but also I know enough to not put others through that lol
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HEY
#art#my art#artists on tumblr#digital art#oc#pink space#i really like the subtract glitch i've been doing recently - so here's some of that again lol :3#the way it interacts with their palettes is so fun i like it a lot ehegh :33#//anyway do you ever consider just tossing out any part the human body you've learned to draw and just drawing dumb little guys with arms#like pipecleaners forever or what hfhs#//oh this is was doobled in traditional originally#i need to digitize more of these. Because#though aura's hair was more extreme in the second panel in that version - i'm tired though and 3 days ago it was the same so no feelings to#change that lol :)#also i didn't shrink the noise enough so it didn't look right - and i was not going to reimport it so Bon Voyage my dude hfhs#was Supposed to fit on a 900x900 canvas but i made the panels a liiiiitle bit too big so it's 950x950#which is Fine it's a round number but it's not a Round-Round number so [gesturing]#1000x1000 was way too big for this little thing so she sits at a pleasant halfway point :>#//anyway i was also up til 3 a.m. last night doing ?? something ?? i genuinely don't even know what lmfhsbvh#nice though maybe my brain'll get a reset lol :3#stay up really late some random nights and jumpstart your brain!! it's foolproof!! never fails!! [<- these statements have not been reviewe#by the FDA or the Center for Sleep Control]#//ANywho now i'm going to be on my way#/oh i also forgot to post the oath n aura refs i made for artfight lol-#i'll prolly put those up w/ the kira and hid ones though :>>#i like to have the whole ensemble :D i Do feel bad when one of them gets left out hghsfh - like forgetting a stuffed animal somewhere#even though they're all together for small portion of the story it still feels off lol#i should prolly introduce the rest of the cast at some point. .... ......... ..........hm yea prolly. maybe one day hfhs#//anyway NOW i'm going i've run out of tag space i think hfhs - toodles !! :>
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Any men out there wanna pretend to be my bf to get my parents off my case about marriage? I am so so serious right now.
#my mom gave me a really really lonf lecture and upset me because her and my dad want me to start thinking about settling down ans getting#married. again. cos this comes up all the time. ans I reiterated that i do wanna marry and have kids. i know im 26 years old why do they'#think im also not aware of this??? like i suddenly forgot my own age and have my head in the clouds all the time. and i got so heated cos i#said they only believe in that in theory. in reality neither of them have accepted the idea od my leaving home or the idea of mw being with#a man. and they start freaking out if they even find out i talk to them so to say they want me to get married is so fucking naive#ans when i mentioned this and that they're more than ok w mt brothers talking tp women she said that if i wanted to settle down she could#talk to dad and they could “go about finding someone for me” and I've never been so pissed#i got so upset. why does everyone keep saying this to me. as if anyone my dad knows could ever be a half decent man#and the truth is they don't care if im in a happy marriage they've accepted that i won't be they only care that im gone and saving face in#front of family. that's all. it's always reputation it's always “what will people say?”#not once did love come up. not once did shw even imply that i should marryfor love#or that they hope i love someone and marry them. because they're more happy with the idea of me marrying for the sake of it than#they are at the idea of me finding genuine lovw#im not a fucking broodmare im not here to push out babies for the sake od reputation.#and then i said nor being married isn't the end of the world and she said “it's important that you settle down”#and i said im unwavering in my principles. she can call mw high maintenance like she loves doing but I'm not wavering on the#kind of man i want to be with and when i do marry him i want it to bw genuine. because be loves me and vice versa not because im ticking off#somethin from a damn checklist to appease them. and if being unwavering on my principles means staying unmarried then so be it.#my obligations are to god and myself and that's it#and y'know what??? i am in love with a boy already#and yet they don't care that i wanna be in love at all. no im just a puppet to follow a certain narrative in life live according to evergone#else has and that's it.#im done.#and then she tried to apologise by getting me a slice of cake and that somehow made me feel worse.#i dont want an apology. i want to be heard and actually listened to for once. i want someone to ask what i want. to actually give a shit#and love me cos it's me. not cos im some thing to further an agenda. or some toy or puppet that does your bidding.#is it so much??? to just want to be loved in return? to marry and live according to how i want to?? ans not want anyone to make these#decision's for me?#ruined my whole day.
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#the thing is. you should believe survivors#also my ex after we broke up tried to go to half of our mutual friend and tell them horrifying stories of abuse he was dealing with#it wasn't even planned smearing campain (I don't think it's his style). he was truly hurt. some things really di happened. some even#happened the way he told it. and some were blowed to 'I went to work with bruises every day' (he was grabbed by hand by other partner once#and had bruises because he was so white-skinned he bruised like from touch)#or how I forced him to live with other man that hated him and turned his life to hell (he forgot to mention that it was my disabled brother#he flew away from our abusive mother as soon as he turned 18 and I gave him shelter. after asking partners to consider this seriously#because it's big commitment. I also stated several times that I'm willing to move out with him if it's unpleasant. also this 'living hell'#was him ignoring my partner completely after he yelled on him several times because as he said he didn't ran away from home#to suffer yelling again)#so yeah. it didn't work that time because my friend actually know everything from me long before my ex came to them#they nodded politely and never talked to him again#but it lingers. and it majes me look really critically at any call out or accusation.#person could be really hurt. really harmed even. and still there could be biases or misunderstanding or any human messiness#it sounds like girl had a horrifying experience. it also looks like she kept illusion of being fully on board and loving it.#was it believably? or he just didn't care#did he pick her because she was young and inexperienced? or because she told him she's interested in bdsm?#did he tried to help her when she was in bad place? or was he calculatingly buying her silence?#was he creepy or was he awkward?#honestly I don't know even... what kind of proofs you can get there#like we have her statement. we have objective thing — texts and vids. we can have Gaiman own statement#so what if he will repeat what stated in messages: it was consensual she literally wrote what she want me to do etc#believe survivors. what if everything she told is true too. but also what in messages are true too#what if she was scared and hurt and also told him yes and more and please master. because people are complicated#would he accused of not reading her mind? would there be charges on not checking enough. HOW WRAP MY MIND AROUND IT#like it's all is ne genuinely trying to understand what's next and how it could be wrapped at all#for the record: even if it was absolutely 💯 consensual and girl like completely lying about everything etc#he's still clearly fucked up and things were messy for a lot of reasons. it's bad!#but there's difference between 'it was rape or coercion' and 'it was poorly planned affair and he should've be more considerate of partners#feelings'. and in any way. hope that girl gets help
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#can i just calm down for 2 seconds please. can the anxiety stop for just a bit please#i'm gonna go buy bubbles#bubbles are nice. i can't do mindful breathing or whatever you call it on my own.#i'll literally panic trying to control my breathing. but. blowing bubbles. that makes me feel better#and it's the same thing but with bubbles. that used to be my go to method before therapy and zoloft#but today i'm just FREAKING out#a friend invited me to something and yesterday when hanging out with another friend i mentioned it#and i was like 'oh you didn't know about it? i'm sure they wouldn't mind. let me ask if you can come'#and that friend left me on read and then finally told me this morning that they weren't sure about it#because apparently someone or some people in the larger like... not friend group more like friend web#don't like this other friend and that's why they weren't invited. that and it was gonna be just a couple of us.#and after apologizing a lot and going back and forth being like 'i'm so sorry this is my fault'#and them being like 'no it's not i should be more inclusive i feel bad not including them'#and me being like no you're allowed to not invite people i shouldn't have mentioned it ahhhhhhhhhhhh#so i don't know where host-friend stands right now about the other friend coming#BUT that other friend invited me out tonight and i had said i would come but that was before all this chaos#so if i go meet them i'll have to avoid the whole invite thing and hope they forgot but i don't think they forgot#and i'm like who doesn't like this person and why because i think i know why and that it's a misunderstanding#and tonight i could casually be like 'hey you should text so-and-so about that thing and touch base' to fix it#BUT if i'm wrong and it's someone ELSE then i don't know why and just ahh i hate drama especially theatre people drama#and i feel extra bad for creating this mess ahhhhh. so now i've been a ball of anxiety all night.#hmm. venting and writing this out made me calm down a little. god i need to get back into journalling
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Did somebody say Bill shouldn't be allowed to swear? I think somebody said Bill shouldn't be allowed to swear. Thanks to that, have these retooled The Good Place jokes:
The "powers that be" can refer to either the Theraprism staff, the Axolotl, or just. Ya know. Disney in general. Or all three! Whichever you think is funniest. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
The "party" Bill's referring to is Weirdmageddon, of course. He was quite the ashhole to everyone back then.
Ford has probably gotten pretty good at the 'tune out your psychopathic ex with dank memes' challenge.
It must be very cathartic to be able to make Bill shut up whenever you want with just the press of a button. I'm sure Ford doesn't abuse this ability at all.
Oh, sure, 'Not now,' he says, before he immediately backs out of the newly-made hole in the Theraprism wall. 🙄
Don't worry, Bill doesn't get far.
also yeah i know this one doesn't have an attempted swear - i just wanted to use the joke because of the massive stink-eye involved in it because it makes me laugh
⬇️ More goofs beneath the brief ramble if you wanna skip it lmao⬇️
Why is Ford even there, you might ask? Well, he either decided he preferred to watch Bill suffer in person over being distantly and repeatedly harassed with the same evil desperation book for the rest of his life, or he got roped into some kind of contrived community service for 1.) all his many counts of interdimensional thievery, and 2.) his ignoring all the very clear warnings to NOT summon Bill in the first place (which I like to imagine is also illegal). Theraprism staff were just like, 'Wait, this guy matters to Bill? Ooh, we can USE that! It might be the only thing that can help him want to get better!' It is not considered that throwing Ford at Bill so soon after Weirdmageddon could instead make them both WORSE - in new and altogether special ways! :D
Anyway, I'm calling it the Community Service AU, and I am most likely not going to do anything else with it beyond appropriating these silly Good Place jokes. So, feel free to adopt the concept if y'all wanna??? Just make sure that Bill is still not allowed to swear, no matter what, full stop. It's gotta be a real linguistic corkblork of a situation for him, is all I'm sayin'.
Finally, have these bonus Good Place jokes, but with Handyman!Bill this time:
'Opposite tortures' doesn't sound so bad...at least until it's an all-powerful chaos entity known for torture saying it.
you may think i forgot mabel's cute pink cheeks but the truth is that i did in fact forget but then immediately stopped caring which makes it okay, SHHHHHHH
And, finally:
lmao this is shit
True facts, if you cram Season 1 Eleanor Shellstrop and Michael into a singular triangle shape, they turn into Bill Cipher. This is science, look it up. Or don't, and just trust the source that is me, bro.
Anyway, I should be in bed, y'all have fun with these, I guess. Tune in after like a week or so and maybe I'll have an addendum to my comic about how Bill was drawn naked for karaoke night. Because him actually being naked was not the only thing I considered as a plausible explanation. XD
Also if you see any inconsistencies or errors in any of these comics, No You Do Not :D
Also also, reblogs are rad as hell and I appreciate every single one, just don't repost, please and thanks. Every time a repost is made, an artist somewhere cries. :,)
#fanart#gravity falls#billford#bill cipher#stanford pines#stanley pines#dipper pines#mabel pines#pyronica#handyman bill au#book of bill#the good place#incorrect quotes#heck yeah i'm tagging billford - cuz these old men are EXES#jfc i said i wasn't going to color any other gravity falls stuff i made - and then what do i do?#i fukken color all of it#i may have a problem lmao#the green area outside the theraprism is because i forgot what was outside it and just went 'lol greenscreen idgaf'
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part 2 lol
so apparently it's really fucking hard to get into the SAS. and ontop of that I've been getting tiktoks of people going around an army base asking why they joined. most responses were to pay off student loans, bills, school, (someone said there's was 6 years of prison or school and *mental note for idea*), the recruiter lied or spoilt them, barracks bunny.
141 (poly?) x notsobaddasssoldier!reader
and now i can't stop thinking of soldier!reader. who really half-assed their way through everything - only doing the job for the money and to pay off student loans + they had nothing better to do.
who somehow ends up being adopted by Price (kinda like Gaz i guess ???) all because reader happened to be in the right place at the right time and saved Price's ass while managing to complete a mission the Task Force were doing.
and it's not that you saved his ass or completed the mission that makes Price go *this is mine* - it's the fact that afterwards all you can say is-
"this shit is so not worth paying off my student loans."
"oh fuck i forgot to cancel my subscription. fuckk- waste of fucking money"
- all the while a building is burning in front of you but yeah just not at all concerned about what had just happened. so price just *grabs you by the back of your neck and holds you up, claiming you as part of his task force now.*
(lol you probably can't do that irl but this is fiction sooo suck my ass.)
and laswell's just like no... they are very much still green john. way too green. no.
but it's too late. he's already introducing you to the task force. singing your praises and you're just like
"man he promised to pay off my student loans and give me food." basically how ur recruiter got ya ass.
enough said. you get the whole off the books speech, saving the world by doing things others wouldn't like. but u couldn't give a rats ass - you should but nah...
and like... you know you're the rookie... you're still green... but some of the shit 141 do you just...
"so you just gonna kidnap the wife AND the child...? right... kid, you wanna watch bluey? here..."
"and you do this often...? crazy."
but you don't exactly protest. how could you with how much you get paid. you kinda just side-eye and look away when it's geta a lil crazy. *bombastic side-eye*
and the other 141 guys - oh my days. become just as enormed as price and want to start really trying to amplify your skills. but every time, they start explaining how to do things - the best way to go about a situation or how to fight a certain way.
you pull this face. like your top lip pulls back, your eyebrows scrunch together, and there's a slight frown on your lips as they speak. like you look confused/disgusted. but you don't even realise cause-
"why're you pulling that face?" 141
"that's... that's just my focusing face..."
"oh..." 141 feels bad
then when they do take you in feild you're shaking your head no. like you haven't been around that long. what the fuck? now you're bout to infiltrate an enemy base!?!?!
"can i just wait in the car?"
"no." price
"i'm gonna vomit."
"aim at the enemy." ghost
people think that because you're suddenly in this badass task force that surely they're just using you for your assets.
they all think you're the 141 barracks bunny. and maybe you should be pissed or annoyed or grossed out. but all you can do is sigh and pause from the burger price got you, and let out a long exhale.
"fuck... maybe i can just do onlyfans or be a pornstar... shit maybe it's not too late..."
"military is bascially sex work - selling my body..."
"not that different from what i'm doing now. body being used, check. body sore in the strangest places, check."
your tone so empty, blank and nonchalant, but there's a serious look in your eyes that when you grab your phone out to maybe do a little research on how you could do that, your phone is snatched from your hand by one of the guys and they walk out the room without a second look back.
with an annoyed huff, you go back to eating your burger. but suddenly, you turn to the person who genuinely thought you were a barracks bunny.
"hey you think if i be a barracks bunny i get out of missions and shit?"
"...that's not how it works..." rando.
"fuck."
and maybe you try...
like you go to price's office and the guys are already in there, chatting about something that you should really pay attention too but you can't be assed. instead you unashamedly start to speak...
"if i suck ya'll dicks can i get out the mission?"
"no. you still have to join." gaz says amused
"even if you-" *que long sigh from price* "even if you suck our dicks."
"that's fucked up. i should've done porn."
and with the most hurt and broken-hearted look on your face, you leave the office, closing the door with a dramatic sigh. the guys just stare at the door in... confusion, amusement, and maybe arousal if ya'll dig that
idk man just gimmie more soldier!reader who just really ain't the fucked, there for money, lowkey hungry and doesn't know what the fuck is happening. kinda a pet or little sibling energy that the 141 love.
bonus*
"wait so they aren't sucking our dicks?" *soap says getting slapped in the back of the head by ghost
a/n: brain is rottinnggg. i should be doing so much other shit but... cod just consumes my brain 24/7
#my post#x reader#poly 141#poly 141 x reader#john price x reader#kyle gaz garrick#simon ghost riley#kyle garrick x reader#simon riley x reader#johnny mactavish#johnny mactavish x reader#johnny soap mactavish#captain price x reader#captain john price x reader#platonic 141#?#task force x reader#task force 141#platonic!141 x reader#boowrites#cod mwii#mwii#cod#simon riley#ghost x reader#kyle gaz garrick x reader#simon ghost riley x reader#cod mwii imagines
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yandere! malewife who is indecisive and can't decide on whether he wants to love or hate (also love, just with insults added instead) you today.
imagine ur cute lil guy that you love going "you're such a horrible spouse i hate you, go die" out of nowhere then you bring up the divorce card and he goes all ballistic
"ugh i hate this. this is the third sandwich I've made for you today and-"
"let's get a divorce."
"if you divorce me i will fuck up your life so bad, manipulate you into thinking that I was the only good thing you had that you have no choice but to get back with me."
like this guy is actually insane. he will not leave you alone and he will actually commit all the atrocities he threatens to do.
"wow this guy looks hot af"
"who? this random on the internet? you like them?"
"yeah this guy is kinda cute ngl"
"why are you looking at him? i will steal his skin and wear it if you keep complimenting him. you only need me. actually, do you want me to look like him? huh? should i start working out? buy a whole new wardrobe? just say yes and I'll do it all for you."
you actually don't know why you married him if he was going to threaten you for every little thing you did. you can't even talk to someone else without him getting all mad and upset. maybe it's cause you secretly like the way he's obsessed over you.
or maybe he's just cute. you'll never know.
what you do know is that you like providing him with what he needs and being the person he relies on. well, tbh, you're pretty sure he's like some secret underground black market trader or something because he gets money from nowhere. money you didn't give him. but you trust what he says. if he says he didn't do it, he probably didn't, right?
"hey honey how come you have 300k more in your bank account? i haven't sent you your monthly allowance."
"i actually harvest people's organs and sell them in the black market."
"...really?"
"no haha just kidding! i just saved up physical cash that you gave me and forgot to put it in until today❤️"
"oh ok"
yeah, you love your malewife 😁👍
#yandere#tw yandere#yandere x reader#yandere drabbles#yandere scenario#yandere scenarios#yandere concept#yandere imagines#yandere imagine#yandere malewife#yandere malewife x reader#gn reader#suiana rambling#suiana brainrotting
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inkbrush clips from january - february 2023! mostly rainmaker clips sorted from chronological order from when i was in wee c rank and then when i got into S+ :D
#splatoon 3#lizz.mp4#editing this made me so nostalgic??? i used to play so much rainmaker and ranked and now i just... don't#something i need to remind myself while playing splatoon is that i should do things anyway even if im scared#im mostly just scared of my rank dropping i dont want my points to go into the negatives... LMAO#also fun fact all of these clips are on sticks. i managed to get to S+ with inkbrush on sticks.#i didnt learn motion until like.. april? or something? when i started taking an interest in squiffer#im ngl i forgot about some of the clips i took here since i didnt always clip/post everything on my former sc dump on twt#so it was nice having the throwback!!#i dont know if i'll have another inkbrush comp it depends on what clips i've taken but i know that overtime i've taken less clips 4 brush#probably because i've played it so much that getting 1-2 splats is like (shrugs ok)#also lol tumblr logged me out while uploading this. cursed website actually
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IdeaDpxDc: A nice moment with a sleep demon.
Note: Sorry, I don't know English, so please use a translator. I apologize if you don't get the idea.
Dead On Main.
---
Danny accidentally absorbed some of Nocturn's powers (like in the Vortex episode), and now, with these new temporary abilities, why not take advantage of them? Like a kid with a new toy, Danny (or should I say Phantom: with a new design) has fun every night going from dream to dream.
The dream world is so strange! Without the constant threat of a dream entity trying to take over the world and all that. Now he has fun exploring the most unusual parts of his classmates' subconscious, or anyone's in general.
Even though he knows he shouldn't be doing this (after all, he's a responsible adult now), spying on other people's dreams isn't exactly something a mature person would do.
On the other hand, Danny is the responsible adult; Phantom is the one who uses his new powers recklessly. Plus, no one in Gotham knows who Phantom is, and at the end of the day, he's not hurting anyone. Point in his favor!
It was all fun and games… until he felt it: the unpleasant taste of a nightmare, distressing and desperate. Phantom knows he has to intervene, because, unlike Nocturn, he does not delight in the suffering of others.
So he goes. And what he sees shocks him.
Resonant laughter of a psychopath, the constant pain of flesh being beaten, and the devastating reminder that no one came to help. Phantom doesn't just see it, he feels it. Gross. What is this? Why would anyone be hurting a child? Then he understands: this is not just a nightmare, it's a memory, and someone is suffering from reliving it.
He absolutely will not allow this nightmare to continue.
...
Jason hasn't been having good days lately, mostly because instead of going to therapy, he's chosen to sweep his trauma under the rug and aggressively throw himself into crime-fighting. He's not good at dealing with his emotions, especially when he's been tormented by the same damn nightmare over and over again.
He knows the script by heart, he knows how it will end, but he still feels the same fear as the first time.
His head hurts.
"No, not again," he thinks in terror. Once again, he's tied up, unable to move or call for help. It's colder than he remembers. The walls have a grotesque tint, with laughter written in every corner. But the worst thing is the silence… until the sound of clashing metal begins to resonate.
Everything is a thousand times worse. He's sure the original scenario wasn't like this, but his terrified mind refuses to accept it.
The metallic sound resonates louder, each crash rumbling in Jason's chest. His breathing quickens, and then he hears it: that laugh.
A deep, distorted echo of laughter that seems to come from every direction. The laughter snakes around the grotesque walls, filled with the same letters that repeat his agony. “Ha… ha… ha…” fills the air, louder with each invisible step that approaches.
Then, he appears.
It’s not the Joker he remembers from that fateful night. This one is worse. Bigger, more deformed, with a smile that seems to tear at his own face. The colors of his suit are darker, more twisted. It’s as if his mind has amplified him, made him more monstrous.
“My, my, how little Robin has grown? But… something remains the same, doesn’t it? No matter how many times you live it, it always ends the same way. And to think that you were my greatest work of art!”
His voice is mocking, but behind the mockery is pure cruelty, a wicked amusement that lights up in those crazy eyes.
The Joker leans towards Jason, his face invading the small distance between them. The sound of metal continues to echo, and Jason knows what's coming next.
"Oh, I almost forgot…" he says, pulling out of nowhere an iron crowbar that gleams in the dim light of the nightmare. "It wouldn't be a good memory without this, would it?"
That's when the pain begins. Jason doesn't want to scream, and he won't. Even though that abominable creature is just a representation of his killer, he won't give him the luxury of listening to him suffer. The blows continue, and Jason bites his tongue. It's just a nightmare, it's not real… it's not real.
It's not real.
It's not real.
It's not-
"Hey… Are you okay?" he hears him ask. His shocked gaze turns to where the clown should be and discovers that he's gone. In his place, there's a handsome young man: short, slightly messy black hair, expressive purple eyes, and a body almost completely shrouded in dark shadows.
The mysterious man had a cosmic air about him, surrounded by a mix of special effects of stars and galaxies. Something magical.
And new.
Jason honestly doesn't know what he's seeing, or why he's seeing it. "What?" he says, unable to find another word to describe his situation.
The entity laughs at his stunned state, a reassuring echo very different from the joker's laughter. Then he snaps his fingers, and suddenly he's no longer in that ugly room. He's now in a field of flowers, beautiful and vibrant, looking out at a starry sky.
Okay, this is the part where he asks his brain how he went from being in a nightmare to being with a handsome guy under the stars, hands free and untethered.
"Relax, you're not crazy," the being says as he lies back in the grass. “You were in pain, and I didn’t like it, so I got you out of there. Don’t worry, that abomination won’t bother you again.”
Jason blinks twice, bewildered, not understanding anything. “You… saved me?”
“You could say yes.”
“Why?” He shakes his head. “No, wait, that’s not the question. Who…?” Looking back at the being, he decides to change his question: “What are you?”
He seems to have taken the being by surprise.
It clasps its hands together as it looks up at the sky, trying to act normal. Jason narrows his eyes. “You can call me Void.”
“Did you just make up that name?”
The being looks away, seemingly embarrassed at being found out. “Yeah…” And suddenly exclaims, “Ah, ancients! I'm not supposed to be doing this, much less with one of the bats."
That last sentence had given away more than it should have.
"Hey, how about we admire the night view and then pretend this never happened?" Void suggested with a hopeful smile, turning to Jason.
Maybe it was the soft scent of the flowers, the calm atmosphere, or just the tiredness after so many nights of endless nightmares, but Jason, without thinking too much about it, walked over, lay down next to Void on the grass, and said, "No."
He needed a break.
...
And that's how Jason befriended a dream demon. And how Danny pretended to be a dream demon until Nocturn's powers wore off. He couldn't let the bats find out his identity.
After that, they spent more time together, fell in love, there was drama and there was closure. In the middle of all that, Danny started having tea with Alfred in the dream world, and at other times, he had fun bothering the other bats in their dreams.
But that's another story.
---
Note: Sorry, I don't know English, so please use a translator. I apologize if you don't get the idea.
Part 2
#dead on main#dp x dc#batpham#danny phantom#dc x dp#dp x dc crossover#dp x dc prompt#danny fenton x jason todd#dcxdp#dc x dp crossover#void!danny#dead on main ship#i do not know english#i used a translator
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MAYA, I MANIFESTED MY DREAM LIFE!!!!
Okay, I don't know if you remember me, but I participated in a lot of your challenges and the Pink’s challenge, and I found some success! I shifted to my wr and manifested some things, but I could never do it consistently, and it was really fucking annoying.
So, I took three months off and worked hard, using subliminals every day and going on affirmation rampages. I was doing lucid dreaming methods, SATs, meditations, yoga nidra, reading spiritual books literally my whole summer was dedicated to shifting and the void state. I was eat sleeping and breathing it because I could not continue to live the way I was even I can even consider that living …
So What did I do
I just followed your challenge because college was starting, and I couldn't go back to school without my dream life for the fourth time, fearing I might actually harm myself. So played the fields with this rampage (together in two different tabs).
During the Day
https://youtu.be/aLsn6ZK4RZ8?si=Dt_j7ChLjNsQ6tpV
https://youtu.be/gBD4Owz1GC0?si=icOkN1DoFsqP-adT
During the day, I would live in the end. I created albums for my desired realities, re-read my scripts, revised my void list because I genuinely believed I was going to succeed, watched supercell shifting videos on YouTube, and stared at my vision board, realizing it was going to be my life the next day, and more!
Overnight
https://youtu.be/JwV297pP9aw?si=Sxx-xlhE_owInoxH
https://youtu.be/DKB5I9y8SEg?si=PI-UaNw2m_VUWYy1
What I Manifested
- Master shifting abilities
- Master void state abilities
- Having my WR to be a perfect heaven
- Making this current reality a dream: desired looks, desired body, never gaining weight, revised wealth and family, dream friend group, a social media following, being worshipped and respected, being so beautiful by my own standards, dream home (I have a mountain range that goes through my backyard and a farm on my land, it’s enormous), revised city, only attracting wealthy, tall, attractive men, pretty privilege, 145 IQ, going to an Ivy League, getting rid of my anxiety and depression, getting rid of my health issues, no toxic family, so much money, and revised my name to Bella because I love Bella Hadid (my old name was Audrey), and so much more.
I know it sounds nothing too crazy compared to other people who manifest powers and trillions of dollars, but I can shift anytime I want. I’m going to my singing desired reality and high school musical Dr soon and I am so excited I have hundreds of places to explore. My life here finally has stability, and I’m so happy. Not waking up with stress, nausea, and diarrhea is a blessing. My house is clean, my family members aren’t fighting and calling me names, my siblings and I are close. I audibly gasp anytime I see myself in the mirror. My phone is always blowing up with people asking me for plans when it used to be dry as hell, and people forgot I even existed. Everywhere I go, people tell me I should model, want to pay for what I’m buying, are so kind, open doors for me, want to help me for no reason, give me discounts, ask me on dates… I’m so happy and confused. I don’t know how to feel. I am genuinely so loved and respected, and on top of that, I get to explore the universe of my favorite shows and movies.
I’m so glad I never gave up, even though these three months were hard and my life had gotten worse, I am finally free, my hard work paid off, and I hope everyone else will do the same. We truly are God! I was afraid this community was some big joke and big bloggers were creative writers or just laughing at delusional people like me, but I can confirm it’s very, very real.
My love I am so proud of you ! And yes I vaguely remember you and your first shift you messaged me about :)!
I am happy your hard work paid off as well. I remember when everything seemed so meaningless and delusional as well and I also thought shifting was some big joke to target mentally ill teens, but the reality is we truly are all god and no amount of doubt and struggle will ever change that truth. I hope you enjoy your dream life, and I am happy I could help 💖
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"the curtains weren't blue on purpose. why should we care?"
my love! let me ask you this - did you eat breakfast today? this tiny moment in your life. just think about it. did you?
for some of you, the answer is yes and for some of you it is technically and for some of you it is does coffee count. some of you reached for cereal or gmo-free overnight oats or frozen waffles or 3-day-old pizza. sometimes we eat the same thing, every day, for weeks. i get tired of eggs randomly, only to go back to craving them desperately. i'm cuban; i take my coffee like my father showed me, very milky and sweet.
some of us ate in a hurry. some of us hate eating breakfast but if we don't we will get nauseous later. some of us took our meds first or took our meds after. some of us have a kitchen 5 feet wide and sometimes it's the biggest room in the house. some of us are confident there will be food in the pantry and some of us flinch and say well, the paycheck is coming. some of us turn on a podcast while we eat or we scroll our phones or write in our diaries.
some of us are choosing, specifically, not to eat breakfast. some of us are too busy. some of us are pretending we "just forgot," but we are ignoring the warning signs that everything feels too-heavy. some of us are so consumed with anxiety or grief that we can't eat. some of us can't stand up long enough to make our coffee. some of us have no table to sit down and eat.
i cannot tell you what an artist "meant" by their choices. but they did have to make a choice, conscious or otherwise, to give you information. to give you a little bit more light. each of these choices are little stars of data; connecting speckles for you to weave through, drawing a line.
you cannot use a mirror in a dark room. for some of us; we will not care that the curtains are blue, because that will just be a data point and not enough light to see by. for some of us, the blue curtains will be the same as our childhood bedroom. it will make us seasick. for some of us, blue will be the color of frostbite. it might look like a pixel up close; but from a distance, oh! the picture blooms.
i cannot tell you what will stick out for you. what will carry meaning. some of you will read the sentence "i didn't have breakfast today" and say "this means nothing." some of you will read that and say "oh, me neither." some of you will say "this means the character is probably a little grouchy." some of you will say "oh, i wonder if they're okay. why didn't they eat anything?" ... art is a mirror. i am holding hands with you, over space and time, and asking you to feel something with me.
i want you to read my work and find a blue pair of curtains. i want you to read my work and find things in it that i never imagined placing. i have no way of knowing what will resonate with you, that's true. and maybe i just was hungry while i wrote this, and thinking about the eggs in my fridge. but if you found meaning, that meaning is yours. it cannot be erased just because i didn't "intend" it. you created a different world by interpreting my work. it's collaborative! that's beautiful! that's stunning!
just! imagine looking at the night sky and saying - it's stupid to have a favorite constellation or a favorite star. they're just there.
because here's the thing - across centuries and cultures, we look up. we still find meaning in the stars. these beautiful, lovely scattered accidents. are you looking? they call. and we look back and say oh! of course we are!
#this got away from me#but like#u know#reading is a form of creation#and sometimes the choice that the author makes might SEEM random#but it's like. bro that's telling u something.#also hate the vibe where authors/artists mock their audience for finding meaning in something#nahhhh#if u make art u need to be okay with people finding their own reflection in it
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.
#Reading the 18.5 guidebook I got in Italian and... wow haha#Many things are so#I don't know if they were not translated or if I just forgot about them lol#But like#At one point Oz was going to be a girl (which I did recall) and him and Gil would have Some Tension#even though Gil can't forget the girl from his last (proto-Lacie)#The little comic teases the question whether Gil would choose that girl or Til-girl-Oz#And it ends with Oz being super embarrassed and Gil telling him it's alright#That no matter girl or boy or of he had any other name (hehe Romeo and Juliet)‚ it would be the same for him#And Oz would still be himself for Gil#And if that's not... If that's not haha#Like it's so on your face the romantic aspect of that relationship from Gil's side. More explicitly than in the manga itself haha#It was fun to find it#I won't talk about the... trans? implications of this all because that's clear enough in the manga I think#But it's cool#I talk too much#I should probably delete this later#There's a mention of Oz wearing that dark suit in the middle part of the manga in part as mourning for Elliot#And I also didn't remember reading that but I loved it
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