#So even less probable its about me right?

[enwoso]

hey i absolutely love the lovie fics and i had a request for a fic about lovie getting into alessias make up or one about her as a newborn and meeting alessias family at her parents house

DAB TO FAR | alessia russo x child!reader

grumpy masterlist

the faint hum of the hairdryer had been the background noise for most of the afternoon for alessia's as she was preparing for the fifa awards in london.

the award show being a significant event, her and a few of her other teammate's nominated for the fifa best XI and alessia wanted everything to be perfect.

she tasked her brothers, luca and gio the job of baby sitting you for the night. admittedly they were not the blondes first choice — that would have definitely gone to her mum and dad. but they were out of town choosing to extend their winter holiday in the sun.

so her brothers would have to do. but while alessia was getting her hair and makeup done. it had been surprisingly quiet in her home, too quiet.

her hair stylist, louise finishing up her curled bun as she quickly excused herself telling the girl she should probably check up on you in which she just laughed waving the blonde off to do whatever she needed to do.

alessia's gut twinged as she walked up the stairs, her hair styled perfectly with each hair having a place. but something wasn’t right.

you weren't exactly known for being silent, especially when you were at home. alessia had a hard time getting you to be quiet in the comfort of your own home. you were more of a constant giggler, singer or babbler.

alessia slipped the salon cape on the banister at the top of the stairs, "guys?" she called out.

walking into the room where she could hear gio screaming at what she discovered to be the tv, as he was glued to the gaming console, headset on, controlled in hand as he sat on the edge of the bottom of the bed.

luca was sprawled out on the spare bedroom bed, sound asleep over the noise of gio, his mouth slightly open. typical.

gio was too immersed to even notice her approach. "gio," alessia said, hands on her hips.

he jumped, scrambling to pull one side of the headset off as he noticed his sister with a not too impressed look on her face.

"oh, hey less. your hair looks nice, louise's has done a grand job!" gio smiled as he tried to waver the unimpressed look of his sisters face.

"where's lovie?"

gio face went blank, then turned to mild panic before he stuttered out a response, "uh- i..i thought she was with you?"

alessia's sharp inhale could have rivaled a gale-force wind, "you thought she was with me?"

"well, yeah, she was here a second ago-"

"giorgio!" she groaned, cutting him off as she spun on her heel to try and find you, she didn't have time to lecture him right now. her mind raced as she checked the kitchen and the backyard calling out for you.

"lovie, baby where are you?"

but i wasn't until she was doing the second check of the the upstairs when she passed her room that she noticed something odd. the door was slightly open, and alessia could distinctly remember shutting it earlier.

she gently pushed it open and froze as she poked her head into the room.

you perched on the vanity chair, one leg swinging back and forth as you were surrounded by an explosion of makeup.

eyeshadow palettes were wide open, power dusted across the table and floor like a multicoloured snowstorm. lipstick tubes uncapped and their contents smeared across your tiny face in bold streaks of red and pink.

alessia's blush brush clutched in your tiny hand, its bristles now dipped in an alarming mix of colours.

noticing your mummy in the mirror stood behind you a small wince on her face as you turned and look to her with wide innocent eyes.

your lips - mostly your chin - coated in a sticky uneven layer of alessia's favourite lip gloss.

"mummy! i pretty like you" you declared proudly holding up the brush as if it was a magic wand.

alessia bit back a laugh, she wanted to cry over her ruined makeup but the sight of you so proud of your work melted away any frustration that was building.

"lovie," alessia said crouching down to your level as you sat on the vanity chair, "what have you done?"

you big smile faltered slightly, "i getting ready for the awards.. like you!"

alessia let out a small sigh, softening her tone, "lovie, you know you can't play with mummy's makeup like this. it's special to me and not for little girls"

your bottom lip trembled and alessia quickly reached out to wipe a bit of lipstick off your cheek. "it's okay but we're gonna have to clean this up together alright?"

you nodded solemnly your hands still clutching the brush and a half melted lipstick tube.

after cleaning up majority of the mess - and giving your face a thorough wipe, alessia was matching back into the guest room as you sat downstairs in the living room watching a programme in a fresh pair of pyjamas.

walking into the room, alessia flicked off the tv in the middle of the game gio was playing as she stood blocking the view of the tv.

"hey! alessia!" gio protested, glaring up at her as the gaming controller fell from his hands to his lap.

"don't you 'hey' me. you and him are supposed to be watching her" alessia gestures to downstairs. "you know where i found her? covered in my makeup! luca's asleep and your here playing a game i know you spent more than 12 hours a day playing!"

gio winced, sensing the slight frustration in his younger sisters tone, "she was quiet so i thought.."

"exactly! she was quiet that should have been your first clue!"

alessia didn't spare him any more words as she moved over to were luca lay sprawled out asleep on the bed. jabbing him slightly hard in the shoulder causing the boy to jolt up.

luca rubbed a hand over his face as he blinked groggily, "what's going on?"

"you're supposed to be helping watch lovie, not napping!"

"she's fine" luca mumbled defensively as his eyes fluttered closed again.

"erm she's wasn't actually, she was busy picasso-ing herself with my makeup in my room!"

luca groaned but alessia was already on her way back downstairs knowing her the makeup artist here to do her makeup would be waiting as she muttered under her breath about her useless brothers

as the makeup artist did the finishing touches as you sat comfortably in your mummy's arms getting your hugs in before alessia left as alessia couldn't help but chuckle at the memory of your colourful face.

you may have made a mess and ruined a bit of her makeup that she would no doubly have to replace but there wasn't anything she would trade it for then to have those memories with you.

she would however think twice about trusting her brothers with babysitting duties again...

[rinsko]

THAT FUNNY LITTLE GIRL ♡ GOJO SATORU

he hopes this lifetime will be enough to love.

papa! gojo washes his baby’s hair, what could go wrong! jumping thru the timeline, multiple times. sfw, fluff. approx. two thousand word count. he is filled to the brim with love.

“daddy?” his baby calls for him, satoru, who happens to be sitting right beside her bathtub— criss-crossed legs, paying less and less mind to the cold tile floor that’s making his skin shiver, and more on what she has to say.

“yeah baby?” he’s just down the hall, but you’ve begun to pick apart how his voice, with every syllable, sounds so fond when he speaks to her: his very precious girl.

you hear the gentle hum she hums for a quick second, the mumbling, jumbling of her words as she sorts out what she wants to say and then, “why’s the sky blue?”

★ ‎

there’s a bathtub marker in her hand when she asks, the very same ones satoru was so incredibly persistent on buying at your last shopping store run—

“bathtub markers?” he hears the quirk in your eyebrow before he has a chance to see it, holding the pack of eight in his hand like it’s the greatest invention yet.

“yup! we need them!” he stands side by side with his mini me— matching pairs of silly puppy dog eyes appear on their faces and a dramatic pout fixed to both their lips.

he whispers what he thinks you won’t hear, covering his lips behind the palm of his hand as he kneels to her side. “pst…” he hisses comically loud, “we need to say please, sunshine.”

“pease!” no please, (she’s much cuter about this whole ordeal than he is—) she nods her head as she swings her feet back and forth, fluttering without a sound.

could you guess what’s harder than saying no to her? satoru would vote it’s probably saying: goodbye!

your heart aches lovingly, too impossible to resist— “‘toru, it sounds like you want them more than she does.” grabbing the bundle of markers, you flip them to the side, skimming through its directions and their warnings.

“me?!” he says in the least dramatic tone he could possibly mutter, “are you denying our baby of an artistic future?” and then there’s a hand over his face again. he covers the gasping motion he’s currently molded into, “that she’s not destined to be the next picasso?”

“she’s three! how would you know?” funny grins paint over both your faces because it’s a bittersweet thought: her future, who’ll she be and what’ll become of her.

“there’s an artist inside that little heart, i can feel it.” he’s determined to stick to the skit, crossing his arms over his chest and puffing with a promising certainty for it all.

it’s even funnier when he knows he’s won too: when you hand over the markers to your baby’s pudgy fingers, he has that face plastered on. same one as every other time he’s won you over on something hilariously trivial.

“so honey,” focusing, you decide to actively ignore the cutest dimples on the corner of his smile, “what will you draw when you get home today?”

“f’owers” she points at the red marker, “more for you!” an obvious reference to the dozen roses she’s seen on the dinner table.

“you’re so sweet! i know you’ll draw me the prettiest flowers, my love!” you kiss the tip of her nose as tiny pearly whites form a cheeky smile in return— “ahem.” satoru follows slowly behind you both as you begin to stroll down the aisle again.

“and for daddy,” the coast is clear so you take the chance to stop and spread your arms as wide as you can, “you draw him the biggest, blue sky that matches his eyes!”

she giggles at the dramatics, your stretched out arms and satoru’s loving gaze directed toward you— she mimics these two things. “big sky ‘nd daddy!” and it’s true, your satoru carries the big sky wherever he goes.

★ ‎

“uhmm..” he thinks hard about it, rubbing the nape of his neck, setting his glasses down to the side— how exactly do you explain the color of the sky to a toddler?

he scoots in a little closer now, splashing sounds echoing around while she fidgets with the other toys in the bath, “so, the light from mr. sun is made of all the colors of the rainbow. do you know which ones?”

satoru picks out the markers in the same exact pattern he’s memorized— red, orange, yellow, green in her hand, blue, and the purple that seems the closest to violet.

she doesn’t sound very interested, yet. but you doubt it as long as there’s paddling turtles wound up and clicking across the bubbly water; her attention’s obviously elsewhere.

satoru uncaps the yellow marker first: forming one big, rigid circle against the shower wall that represents the sun— followed by streaks of all the other colors in his hands stretching away from it, representing light.

“like this,” he says, “all the colors of the rainbow.” he returns the green marker she had at first, happily holding onto the object again.

“but ms. earth,” a cake of blue forms as the felt tip rolls around in one spot, “likes blue the best. so, she makes her sky blue.” and with that, your baby blinks up at him like a doll— eyelashes pinched into the perfect curl, and he wonders if he’s only confused her even more.

“oh.” it’s funny how somber-toned she sounds— oh, the same tone you’d use after hearing the most unbelievable truth (or a lie!) the utter shock, the disbelief… that oh.

“just kidding!” he gleams brightly now as she watches. apparently, it had been enough to grab her attention even for the slimmest second.

satoru drops the markers back in the bathtub net where she had placed them, settling within her reach.

“the sky’s blue because daddy’s eyes are blue.”

and if he gleams, his baby does too, “i knew it!”

(he promises to explain himself to you a little later. surely, hopefully, you must forgive him and his little, white lie!)

“oh, you did?” satoru settles his knees as close as he can to the tub now, minimizing all the space he can as he reaches for the shampoo bottle on the edge of the tub, “isn’t my little girl so clever? yes, the smartest!”

she giggles, water splashing around as she moves closer towards her daddy’s arms— completely used to this routine by now, “mm, like papa.”

once he squeezes the bottle, he thinks his heart’s being squeezed too. watching chamomile-scented soap pour onto the palm of his hands, he smiles. “you think i’m clever, sunshine?”

“sometimes.” but she’s off in her own little world again, drawing on the wall with her favorite turtle beside her.

he supposes he will take what he can get.

with a gentle rinse to her hair, satoru begins to form a gentle lather along the crown of her head, “i want to be a clever daddy for you,” he says.

you know it comes with no thought, as if the words have simply fallen out and onto his tongue before they’ve finally reached his head, “a good papa.”

and it’s happened so frequently, he jokes with you about how she must have some sort of technique to pull out the honest truth from anyone— even without trying to.

“you just love her, satoru.”

★ ‎

amidst the grogginess of the morning and eyes closed shut, you tell him that much. it’s all you can grumble out when your firefly of a husband rises before the sun.

he claims it’s early morning clarity— when your mind is filled with everything and nothing. all you can do it spill your heart out. not much you can do to help it.

he loves this part of the day with you.

“i do. a lot.” he says in one lasting breath, just before shifting from being your big spoon to peek over at the baby monitor on his bedside table for the… nth time.

if she didn’t make him feel like his entire life was worth it, maybe he wouldn’t look at her so often. but she does, not even aware of it, with a leg dangling off the bed. plushies used for pillows rather than the pillows themselves.

it doesn’t scare him as much as it used to: the act of loving, and the acting of expressing it— the act of admitting just how much he does.

“she loves you too.”

★ ‎

with the soapy suds spilling over his knuckles, between his fingers and the strands of her hair, satoru notices something new.

he twirls a finger around the ends of her hair, strands strong and smooth— as he realizes they’re starting to curve around the shell of her ear on its own, when he doesn’t remember it doing that before.

and as he lowers his gaze, the soapy lather following along, he sees the longest strands of his baby’s hair are bound to meet the back of her neck. nape, ears and shoulders all meeting someone new.

satoru forgets that time goes by fast, especially when you’re filled with love to spare. “when did you start growing up so fast, sunshine?”

she shrugs.

the strength in his knees give out, landing him right back down onto the tile floor; feet tucked underneath his body. “it’s too fast.” he murmurs so lowly, you can barely catch on to what’s been said.

too fast to watch her go— but don’t say it out loud, satoru doesn’t have the heart to finish or hear the rest.

she’ll be able to say please, even without him asking her to. she’ll be able to pronounce her l’s until she loses her two front teeth. she’ll hold onto his hand, and he’ll hold onto her.

then, it’ll be time for school. and she’ll be leaving his side as a big girl now, with a lunch bag he’s packed and a slipping backpack over her shoulder— yes, inevitably, that’s going to happen too, just as he has before.

and if that’s right around the corner, then so is every other phase, inevitably— and the rest of her life from then on. it’s going to happen one day: where satoru’s baby is no longer a baby and he will have to let her go.

“‘toru.” he turns to you, towel in hand, pressing weight against the wall’s edge. “what’re you weepin’ about now, baby?”

your daughter turns to face him in a heartbeat, curious.

“crying?” voice trembling, he nudges his cheek into his sleeve in attempts to hide any evidence, big hands still in need of rinsing along with her hair. “who’s crying?”

stepping closer, you hang the towel over the hook before sitting right next to his side, “because you never cry, especially at random times.” you poke once at his ribs.

“you’re starting to get me, sweetness.” then, he dips his fingers into the water, bubbly foam parting ways from his skin. it falls down her shoulders when he rinses her off, all done with the bath, and having a little time to play.

you watch him for a while, trying to identify the cause and while trying to make small talk— you mention something without much thought, “her hair has gotten a lot longer now.”

his voice, it’s tinier than you’ve ever expected it to be, “i know…” a sniffle divides his sentence, a proper pause, “she’s growing up so fast.”

“ah… so, that’s what this is about.”

you rest your head over his shoulder, still feeling as in love as ever, “you’re cute, you know that?” he rests his in return. “we still have hundreds of days together.” you watch the way she draws on the wall, enjoying her happiness as if it were your own.

“it doesn’t feel like enough.” he says.

“i don’t think it’ll ever be enough.” no, it never will. “maybe we’re greedy like that, honey.” yes, you know this.

he knows he is. because there’s a bright sun in the blue sky with red roses to bring it all together, just like she promised.

“finished!” she looks back at you two, hands in the air in celebration of her brand new masterpiece being born.

“oh! they’re so pretty!” sweet enthusiasm in your voice, you give her all the attention in the world. “just perfect!”

you begin to ask her the little things, every detail you could think of and she could find an answer to, all while wrapping her in the warm towel you hung up earlier.

satoru’s gotten up from the floor too, taking it all in until she calls for him again, “that’s you, daddy.” she points at the blue on the wall as you carry her back to her room.

his heart screams though he’s no longer crying and he hopes this lifetime will be enough to love.

satoru hears your footsteps trickling further down the hall when your voice resounds again, “come on daddy, we need help picking out today’s pijamas!”

“pease, papa hurry!”

his heart screams though he’s no longer crying as he listens to the water flow down the drain, capturing her first piece of art on his phone, he has very little to say.

but if he had to say it and if his baby asked him to, satoru would confess: “i’m so happy. i’m so happy to love you.”

hello friends! this is a repost from my previous blog, mysugu. in the case you recognize this piece, that is (hopefully) why! thank you for reading this bit, (a second time?) he is so loved.

[anomaliex]

Collection of headcanons not elaborate enough for own word vomit post:

- I don't think Kristen can swim. She has the vibes of someone who never learned as a kid and now it's too late to bring up without being embarrassed. (Also I thought about what would happen if she fell in water — mechanically she's wearing heavy armor, would Brennan just let her swim since she's in universe only in a tracksuit or would she sink without a sufficient strength check? Idk, but that's how I got to the no swimming conclusion.)

- insanely weird hc to have but i think Fabian shaves his arm hair. Also like legs and arm pits i guess but the way more unusual and therefore notable thing is arms. This guy kills any body and facial hair on sight. Like no one has ever seen him with as much as stubble outside of Cathilda or the Bad Kids when they were sleeping over. Why? Idk he just prefers that, no deeper reason. I do think elves generally have less body hair but here his human genes come through so he has to shave. Or get it lasered away I guess. You can do that right?? He's rich. Maybe he'd do it.

- also Fabian's depth perception is dog shit. Using his crossbow is less impressive because Fandrangor is simply a better weapon and his flourishes and manoeuvres rely on melee combat, I know, but to me it's also just that he's better at hitting things real close to him.

- Riz is the kinda guy to have chronic migraines and think it's fine. "Everyone has headaches sometimes and I do sleep a lot less than I should ahaha" (the amount of coffee he drinks is barely saving him from the horrors.)

- Adaine also gets a lot of migraines in what I think are more. Passive non specific visions? Like a gut feeling that's always correct and also makes her body hate her. The proper visions are comparable to absence seizures I think? Like I don't wanna say it's that because it's magic but the process is kind of the same in the sense that she's out for like ten to thirty seconds and it can really suck

- I also think Adaine has synaesthesia! I can't really put this into words well so I'm not even gonna try, but she perceives certain sounds and/or colours at times where there shouldn't be sounds and/or colours. I think those associations also to an extend help in drawing connections between less specific visions and real life.

- we know Gorgug has a drumset in his room I think it's electronic. But like not in a normal way like we have them irl it's some insane artificer shit that would justify so much more noise complaints than a regular one and also could probably have its own pyrotechnics idfk. It's fully a safety hazard but it doesn't even rank on the top 10 of worst things to have in your house that is a TREE that the Thistlesprings casually own.

- I think either Fig or Kristen would be the shortest medium creature type Bad Kid. Like obviously Riz is four feet tall max but he's in a whole different category lmao

- Fig sometimes puts little braids in Jawbone's fur and he happily lets her. He only properly adopted Adaine and Fig has more than enough dads, but he does still act as sort of a paternal figure to her (and every other kid ((which in this case includes Ragh but maybe not Aelwyn)) in mordred manor because he's just a caring guy and it's hard not to grow attached) so that's their pseudo daddy-daughter bonding

- Fabian doesn't like, hate Gilear as much as he used to? Like he still has his moments but overall he thinks he's a good guy and absolutely has the "well I can shit on him but I'm gonna kill this other guy who did. How dare you make fun of my Mama's beloved??" mindset. But uhm he tries to make Gilear work out with him so he can "stop being death fodder". Gilear is a commoner and everyone else in Seacaster Manor absolutely is not and like he likes it and he loves these people but he does kind of live in hell. His wife? Could kill him. His step son? Could kill him. The maid? Could kill him. The dog slash motor cycle?? Could kill him. One hit. Also the entire current Seacaster household are dexterity based fighters they're all so graceful and skilled he's fully just a guy that spills every drink ever on himself

- I think the Hangman loves Cathilda because she gives good chin scritchies (hound form obviously lol) Generally he tends to mirror Fabian's attitude towards people anyway so he's always liked her, but once he started being a hound more she started petting him and giving him treats and he is smitten

- Gorgug (and sometimes Ragh or Ayda) play extreme fetch with the Hangman. Like I need to stress that he's not just a big dog he's large enough to be a mount, which means he'd have to be the size of a horse. Maybe a small horse sure but that's still a horse-sized dog. I think his mini looks fairly big but in my heart he's bigger. So yeah fetch with him (which they mainly do because they want him to feel comfortable in both forms because he's so good) is really big sticks. Like not logs or anything but sticks the average person can't huck all that far. Fabian casts enhance ability on himself so he can also do it, lol. The wonders of multiclassing into bard.

- I think the only Bad Kids who never use makeup are Riz and Kristen. Gorgug doesn't do it every day and not that much but he uses eyeliner sometimes. Fig's makeup is the most noticeable and usually very fun.

- Gorgug has kissed Ragh at least twice. So at least one time after the prom thing. I don't mean this in a ship way I mean this in I look at Gorgug and then I look at Ragh and I go yeah these guys have shared at least one tender bro kiss. I mean I think Gorgug is the kinda guy that would kiss all of his friends if they wanted to because it's not that big of a deal to him and he loves them but not everyone is comfortable w/ that lol. He and Kristen kiss each other on the cheek though, I think (this does not mean he wants to see her naked in public please put your clothes back on Kristen??)

[wisteriasymphony]

Chloe had knocked over Marinette's tray at lunch earlier that day. It wasn't anything new, just like the way Chloe had started making oinking noises to Sabrina when Marinette had bent down to clean it up. Or like the way Chloe had said that Marinette didn't really need the extra calories, so she was actually helping her after all.

Lucky Lucky Ladybug kept replaying the scene in her mind, over and over, thinking about just how stupid Chloe would've felt if Tikki had let Marinette transform and give Chloe a talking-to as Ladybug. She had woven the string of her yo-yo between her fingers into a cat's cradle, and every time her hands would stretch apart, the yo-yo would spin on its track. Then she'd bring her hands back together to catch the yo-yo mid spin, the metal body clacking against the bones in her hands. Spin, then clack. Spin, clack. Spin, clack.

Chat Noir had been talking for the past few minutes, but Ladybug never bothered to listen to him anymore. He had probably just made one of his awful puns again, based on the way he started stammering.

"Oh, uh, s-so the joke is that it's a play on the word—" "Have you ever thought that maybe, if you have to explain all of your jokes, you're not funny?" Chat Noir got quiet, his shoulders falling. Ladybug kept her eyes on her yo-yo. "I'm sorry, milady," Chat Noir apologized. "I just assumed you didn't understand the punchline." "Maybe you should come up with jokes other people understand then. That way people might actually laugh at them." Spin, clack. Spin, clack. Ladybug kept imagining Chloe's face, with her pale blue eyeshadow and her cakey makeup.

Chat Noir started to twist his fingers together, the claws on his thumbs digging into his gloved hands. It wasn't anything new—people having little patience with him, that is. His father had gotten him used to it by now. Chat Noir knew that the right thing to do in such situations was just to acquiesce, and that when you acquiesced people liked you more for it. "I noticed you and Rena were on television the other day. How did that go?" Ladybug hunched over herself, scoffing as she wound the string of her yo-yo tighter around her fingers. She had started bring Renared to press conferences and fan meetups because she could trust that Alya wouldn't act like an idiot or say stupid things. Alya was a good friend like that, willing to pick up Chat Noir's slack. Plus, doing things with Rena instead meant that Marinette and Alya could hang out for the rest of the day, and Marinette would actually enjoy herself. Doing anything of that with Chat Noir... would mean she'd be hanging out with Chat Noir. Bad pickup lines and worse jokes included.

"It was fine," Ladybug huffed, rolling her eyes. "Why do you even care?" "Oh- well, uhm. You just used to take me, and I was wondering if you had a reason that you... well... stopped."

One time during an interview, Chat Noir had derailed the entire conversation talking about the intricacies of whether or not their group of holders counted more as a religious or a political organization, entirely unaware that nobody could even begin to care about such a thing. Spin, clack. Spin, clack.

Ladybug thought about the way Chloe's face had scrunched up when she oinked at Marinette. Ladybug thought of Chat Noir's stupid awkward stammer. Ladybug thought about having to admit to her mother that her grades were getting worse.

Ladybug trapped the yo-yo in her hands for the last time, almost trying to crush it.

"It's because she's better at it than you, and I like you better when I don't have to hear you talk. Does that make you happy?!"

Chat Noir almost answered—No, actually, knowing that people didn't like hearing him talk didn't make him happy at all. But he'd learned by now that when Ladybug asked him questions like that, she wasn't actually asking and a response would only make her angrier.

"I'm sorry. I'll talk less, milady."

"I told you to stop calling me that."

"...I'm sorry."

Maybe Chloe could pick on Chat Noir for a change. He deserved it more than she did.

[mysims-mod]

Unused Essences - Part 2

As I mentioned at the beginning of Part 1. I originally wanted to discuss everything in only one post, but because I hit the 30 image limit. I had to split it into two.

If you haven't yet, you can read Part 1 right here.

So without further fanfare, here's the rest. Below the cut again.

It’s fish. Just fish

Now this is where the unused essences start to get… even less complete than what we have seen this far. While there is a flair model leftover, and even a palette of paints. That palette is incomplete, It has a patterned paint swatch, but only one. The second pattern swatch is black, pure complete blackness. And the rest are pure white like the other essences we have discussed.

Now while I have been showing a render of the swatches up to this point, I do think it is worth showing how it looks in-game as well. Because what would be the second patterned swatch is instead completely pitch black.

It’s also worth mentioning that the one (1) swatch we do have is very similar to the rainbow trout swatch visible in-game. In-fact they are virtually identical to one another.

Sad Bear is an interesting case, while every essence that we have looked at so far has had some paints and text tied to it, this one does not. The only thing that remains is this very cute looking flair model.

We don’t know exactly what this would have been. It’s possible that this was just an earlier form of the final sad essence, but we don’t have any definitive evidence, leaving this one as a bit of a mystery.

Burn is another even more interesting one, and is more mysterious than Sad Bear. 

This one is unique in that it does not have any leftover text, or even a flair model, but it does have two full pattern swatches. But this is even more interesting, with everything discussed before, the Material Sets that allow the paints to appear in-game could be brute forced and loaded in the PC version with no problems, this however cannot.

As a result, whether or not there are any flat paints to accompany the palette is completely unknown.

Ok hear me out on this one.

This last one is just the Cherry Blossom essence. Except under the name of Apple Blossom. Every bit of text, every paint swatch, every everything is the exact same as the final Cherry Blossom, but with ‘appleblossom’ as its internal name. However in the actual text that is displayed in-game, it is still referred to as Cherry Blossom.

Interestingly, while the duplicate textures remain in the game’s files. The material set to actually make them appear in-game seems to no longer exist. Creating another Burn essence situation, where they can’t be seen in-game.

Although it would probably just be a duplicate of the Cherry Blossom’s set as well.

It is worth noting that there are also a few other models in the game files bearing the Apple Blossom name, but none of them follow the standard convention for essence models which is ‘flairEssenceName’, but they do at least provide an alternative idea of what an Apple Blossom essence could have looked like.

And with that, these have been almost all of the unused essences in MySims. But believe it or not, there are still more unused essences to talk about! A whopping 27 that I could find at the time I’m writing this.

However they are… much less interesting compared to the ones discussed today. These have all had some kind of interesting leftover attached to them, whether that’s a model, textures, or text. But these remaining essences on the other hand…

Are comprised entirely out of very basic placeholder assets, which make them not very interesting to look at in comparison.

I do want to talk about them at some point in the near future though, and I can say with certainty that it will be before 2032!

[hn-undercover-9503]

uh oh look who got possessed at 4 in the morning and stayed up for another hour exorcising the demons (writing idea)

post-wano zosan/sanzo {platonic or romantic, doesn't matter which way} that spawned from me thinking too hard about the death pact

Most of his crew have already either passed out from the party, or are still recovering inside of the shogun's castle. Last he saw, Franky and Jinbe were the only ones still awake and mingling with the Wano residents. It was almost surreal, this grandiose party, after such a huge battle where there were no less than three times that he was sure they were dead.

⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘

It's well past midnight by now, and yet, the lanterns of the Flower Capital burn just as bright as they did hours before. They light up the night sky, thousands of them drifting into the clouds, high among the stars. Sanji hasn't been able to take his eyes off of them for the last hour. His head is pleasantly foggy, stomach full and body at ease. It's especially nice after the special level of hell all of them went through today. Sitting outside and watching the lights over his head and listening to the sound of a country celebrating the end of its long reign of suffering–it’s comforting, in the kind of way he feels like it's been a while since he felt able to bask in.

But they aren't dead–Sanji and all of his crew are still alive, and victorious.

Some would probably chock up their win to luck, or to random chance. Sanji knows better. He understands that there's one reason, and one reason only, that he's able to sit here on this deck and stare up at the beautiful lanterns containing the dreams and desires of a whole country. And as of right now, that reason is off sawing logs about three rooms away from him.

He could fall asleep out here, he thinks. The weather is perfect, and the noise of the crowd is surprisingly comforting. It's easy for all of it to fade into the background, becoming a soothing hum in the back of his head as his eyes slip closed without him even thinking about it. His body still feels heavy, and honestly, he can use the rest. He may not have been as grievously injured as some of his crew, but he's no stranger to what it feels like to be overworked. Even in this new, strange body, he knows he shouldn't be keeping himself awake after going through what he did.

Unfortunately for him, fate is a cruel mistress.

Just as he feels himself about to drift off completely, there's a dull pain from his side. He sighs, not having the energy to launch an outright attack on whoever's dumb enough to jab him in the ribs when he's sleeping. Instead, he opens one eye and glares up at the figure leaning over him until his tired eyes finally focus.

"Oi," the mosshead grunts, poking him in the side with the scabbard of his newest sword, before seeing Sanji's awake and resting it over his shoulder. "I gotta talk to you, Cook."

Sanji groans, sitting up and rubbing sleep from his eyes. His body cries out its protests, demanding he lay back down and promptly pass out for about thirty eight hours, but he ignores it for now. He sits up and turns a half-hearted glare onto the swordsman as he lowers himself to sit on the deck beside him.

"Shouldn't you be in bed, Marimo?" Sanji grumbles, looking back up at the sky. It's a far less irritating sight than walking fungi keeping him awake. "You look like shit."

Zoro grunts. "Could say the same for you."

"I'm better off than you, shitty swordsman." He quips back immediately, digging into his pocket for his cigarettes purely on instinct. "You didn't have to lug me around a whole castle for several minutes, now, did you?"

"Shut up," Zoro tells him, but there's not an ounce of bite to his tone. He's clearly just as exhausted as Sanji is, probably more. So then...

"What are you here for, Marimo?"

Zoro is quiet for a while–too long, in Sanji's opinion. He looks away from the sky and catches sight of a downturn to the swordsman's lips, his eyebrows pulled together like he's trying really hard to use his singular brain cell to formulate his words. Sanji purses his lips and waits for it.

"During the fight," He begins slowly, slurring his words and drawing out the syllables. "You called me on the snail."

Sanji turns away, looking out over the sprawling crowd still partying on. Okay. That makes sense. He should have known that's what this would be about. He frowns.

"You asked me to kill you, cook." Zoro continues, now glancing at him directly and settling him with a glare that could have knocked out a hundred men. "I want you to tell me what the hell that was all about."

“Why, disappointed you couldn't hold up your end of the deal, Marimo?” He tries to deflect with a smirk right off the bat, but he knows it hasn't worked before he even finishes speaking. Zoro's glare hardens, and Sanji just sighs.

“It's not something I really wanna talk about.” He admits, pulling out his lighter and lighting himself a cigarette. “And it worked out, so you don't need to worry about it. Really.”

Zoro is clearly unconvinced by his assurance. “It's got something to do with you running off to marry that girl, doesn't it?”

“Not…exactly.” He clarifies, which he knows explains nothing. Zoro huffs out an agitated breath.

“If you don't tell me, I'll hafta cut you for it.”

Sanji chuckles. “You and I both know you're in no shape for a brawl right now, Marimo. So heel.”

Zoro rolls his eye at him. “Just–tell me.”

“Why do you wanna know so bad, huh?”

Zoro crosses his arms with a scoff. “You asked me to kill you, dumbass. And you expect me to just shrug it off?”

“Wow, who knew moss could think? So you're sentient after all, huh, Marimo?”

Zoro growls and digs an elbow into his side. It's clear by the pained hiss he lets out afterwards that the action hurt him more than it did Sanji.

He winces and runs at it anyway, if only so he doesn't do it again. After taking a particularly long drag from his cigarette, he breathes out a cloud of smoke and leans back on the deck, face turned up to the sky again. “Fine. But if you really want the whole story, you're gonna be here a while.”

Zoro grunts again and then he's setting his swords aside to lay back next to him, also looking up at the sky. “Just tell me, stupid cook.”

He sighs again, more smoke escaping from his lips. It fades away against the backdrop of night sky, stars, and lanterns. “You got the story of my family from Luffy, I assume?”

“Bits and pieces–I know they weren't your family family.”

Sanji smiles, because of course Luffy would describe it like that. “Yeah. Well, turns out I made a mistake. Using that bastard's weapon, his raid suit–it…did something to me.”

Zoro shifts from beside him, and when he glances over he's sitting up on his elbow to look down at him. “The hell does that mean?”

“My siblings were all born superhuman. Reinforced bodies, crazy fast healing, the works. I wasn't like them. I was just a regular old human.”

Zoro frowns at him. “That a bad thing?”

“In the eyes of the bastard, it was unforgivable.” Sanji shrugs, taking another drag just for the sake of it. “But I preferred it that way–once I got older, at least. My mom died to make sure I got to stay human. I owe everything to what she gave me.” His eyes burn as he prepares his next words, and they stick to his throat when he speaks again. “But because I was a selfish idiot…I wasted her gift.”

“What the fuck are you talking about, swirly?”

Sanji takes a deep breath and another drag, letting the smoke fill his lungs completely and settle his racing heart. “The raid suit. When I wore the suit, it must've triggered something. When I was fighting Queen, my body felt strange. It'd been happening for days, but I didn't think anything of it before. And then Queen got me trapped and I should've been dead, but I wasn't. I could feel my bones shattering, my organs rupturing–but when he let me go, I was fine. Like nothing even happened.”

“So you got strong bones and super healing. Who gives a shit?”

“...those aren't the only traits my siblings share.” Sanji pinches the end of his cigarette between his thumb and forefinger. “They don't experience emotion. At all. It's why they make the perfect war machines. Can't feel bad about destroying a country if you can't feel anything.”

Zoro stays quiet for a while again, and this time is even more nerve-wracking than the last. Anxious, Sanji forces himself to sit up on his elbow and look over to him. His face is impassive, unreadable. Sanji's heart rate speeds up again.

Finally, Zoro grunts yet again. “You're stupid, cook.”

“Wha–” Sanji sputters for a second before the words catch up to him. “Oh, fuck you! I give you my whole story and you're insulting me?” He throws himself back into the deck with a huff. “I don't know why I even bother–”

“You feel too much to never feel anything, idiot.”

Sanji blinks, turning his head again to look at him. He's sitting up now, hunched over and glaring at him. There's no heat behind his steely gaze, though.

“What's that supposed to mean?”

“It means,” This time, Zoro jabs a thumb into his side and Sanji lets out an undignified yelp, pushing out of his reach before he can get any more bright ideas. “Your dumb bleeding heart is too damn big to feel nothing. And you're stupid for thinking it could ever come close.”

Sanji scowls at him. “You don't understand. There was a moment there when I lost control. I thought I–”

“You thought? Thought what, shit cook?” The swordsman barks out a laugh. “Thought you did something terrible and evil, huh? Something that would make you wanna die to my swords?”

“I thought I hit a woman.”

Zoro stares at him for a second before bursting out laughing. “Well? Didja?”

Sanji grits his teeth and reaches out a leg to land a kick to his side, even as his body screams more protests. “Of course not, asshole! I would never–”

“Then shut up about it, would ya?” Zoro yawns, shoving his leg away haphazardly and laying back on the deck with his arms folded behind his head. “That when you called me?”

He frowns, turning back to look at the sky again. “Around there.”

Zoro lets out a deep breath, eye slipping closed. “Looks like I was worried for nothing.”

“Maybe you were.” Sanji admits quietly, watching as the lanterns bob and sway on the sudden breeze. “...hey,”

Zoro grunts instead of replying with words, because he's a caveman at heart.

“I know you think it's stupid…but if it did happen. You'll still keep up your end, won't you?”

The swordsman is silent for so long that Sanji's sure he's gone to sleep. But when he turns around to look at him, the other is staring right at him. For some reason, the look in his singular eye raises the hairs on the back of his neck.

“Course I will.” He eventually says, laying his head back. “But it won't. So shut up and go to sleep.”

Sanji smiles, laying back onto the deck once again. He shuts his eyes, and the pleasant hum of festivities sets over him once more. “That was the plan, at least until a certain mossball decided to interrupt me.”

“I don't need a fucking deal to kill you, shit cook.”

“I'd like to see you try, Marimo.”

[saint-hymn]

hello. thoughts won't leave me alone this day and it's probably due to how cold it is outside. i got a bit curious, so, what do you think about the cold in relation to c!wilbur?

sincerely, 🐁

he is intimate to it, like the relation the cold has to an abandoned house? that's not quite right, i'll come back to that someday

it's a bit like the dread nipping at his heels. have you ever seen him with less than two to three layers of cloth? He's a cold man, I'd imagine his hands are the type that's always clammy and that's what the gloves are for. The uniform staved it off fine at first, the coat's a thick wool and the undershirt's a nice layer of cotton. The cloak-coat-shirt-beanie combo for Pogtopia was fine for the cave's muggy chill. Uncomfortable as hell, i'd imagine, but whatever keeps the cold away. Whatever keeps the dread from eating him alive.

Dying was cold as hell, so to speak.

(Did you know that Dante Alighieri says the layer of hell reserved for treachery is the coldest? Traitors to friends, families, and countries are all trapped in ice.)

Dying was falling into the ocean and sinking from the weight of the sword on his chest. Losing blood made him even colder. Dying was freezing to death despite cPhil, a bastion of warmth—trembling, teeth grit, like he is the one that's cold—holding him closer than he'd ever been held before. Dying is slowly losing the dear warmth wrapped around him. Dying is giving into the cold because it was his joy in unrelenting pain.

The subway isn't exactly cold—it's cold like the idea of being trapped in a fridge in a dream. You acknowledge the low temperature, but you don't feel it on your skin. You acknowledge the dread, the fear, the trembling air as the train rushes in for its next flood of colder shades, but you're out of it enough that all you can focus on is the bite of guitar strings on your skin or how smooth the laminated deck of cards is in your hands. You acknowledge it in every tomorrow creeping in its petty pace.

His revival was the first time that he was warm again. Shirt-sweater-coat, you'd think he's scared of the cold from the ten miles of cloth he's hiding under.

The sunrise was warm. The way everyone treats him thereafter?

[adriberry]

The Meta of Magic in Twst

I apologize dearly for the more concentrated amount of Twisted Wonderland posts today, but I just have a lot of thoughts and feelings after my sister recently got back into the game and we've talked a bit about the story.

It's been hard to organize my thoughts on what I believe is the true origin of magic in Twisted Wonderland. I've wrote a lot of notes about it myself, mostly to use in fanfiction. I'm especially concerned with just how the characters we know as villains in our world are regarded as savors in Twisted Wonderland and why characters like Silver, Rook, and Kalim have golden, glittery cosmic magic while all other characters at NRC have purple, inky cosmic magic. The recent canon origins of magic as told by Lilia to Silver in Book 7 have confirmed some of my theories, so I want to structure my thoughts around that and will probably do so in multiple parts.

I'm sorry if you want to keep spoiler free, but this theory hinges on a few lines of dialogue in a portion of Book 7 which was recently released on JP server.

The Wish

Silver said Lilia once told him that the origin of magic came from a wish- a deep desire to change the world.

Yes, it's cheesy the way Disney things usually are. No, I don't think this is a direct reference to Disney's recent movie Wish (which really is a bunch of Disney animation references, concepts, and themes in a trench coat trying to convince the public it's its own solid Disney Movie, but that's it's own post).

Since the very first Disney animated movie, Snow White and the Seven Dwarves, characters have been singing about wishes and dreams and their deepest desires. Throughout the 100 years of the company's lifespan, it's been touting that dreams are possible if you believe. Disney characters wish on stars and in wells and while belting to no one in particular but the horizon. Disney characters wistfully describe great loves and adventures that they have in their dreams that they chase to make reality. Dreams and wishes are the main theme of every Disney story, so it only makes sense for those to be the strongest themes of Twisted Wonderland.

I've already had a theory that Twisted Wonderland would follow a similar storyline to Fantasmic, so if you'd like to see my take on why the dream hopping in Book 7 is so appropriate now, you can go read the other post. But wishes are a different thing entirely.

There are 3 NRC students whose cosmic magic always got me thinking: Silver, Kalim, and Rook. Most characters' cosmic magic is purple with black specks in it. For these three, their magic is glittering gold. At first my reaction was, "Oh, cute. It's because they're not based on villains!" but this is Yana Toboso we're talking about. She does most things (save for too similar designs for faces) with a reason behind it. And fans have already picked up on a different pattern where Silver, Kalim, and Rook match the knight, pawn, and rook pieces on the chessboard in Leona's room respectively. Why are these characters singled out? Why are there visual differences between their mechanics and the other characters?

On Magic...

Well, I do think it has to do with the fact that they aren't based on villains but it's less of an aesthetic choice than I first thought. These twst characters are based on Disney characters who put faith in others, trust their hearts, and do what's right for no other reason than it's what should be done. And Silver, Kalim, and Rook all do the same. Rook lives authentically even though he spent so much time hiding his true self. Kalim loves Jamil despite the fact Jamil tried to kill him. Silver wants to end the generations long tensions between humans and fairies. They aren't exactly self serving and, though I love all the NRC boys very much, the rest kind of are. Crowley says as much in the Prologue when he praises MC for being able to get Night Raven students to work together for once.

So I think there are two kinds of magic which stem from the idea of "the wish." There is light magic which depends on what's essentially faith, trust, and pixie dust, and there is blot.

We're introduced to magic for the first time via Crowley. Crowley is revealed to be unreliable very quickly as he obviously is taking his sweet time trying to figure out how to get MC home if he really is at all. Based on fan theories and evidence in the text, he might actually be hiding his true identity from us. But in we don't have any of that information in Book 2 when Crowley talks about overblot, so we trust him when he shows us how blot works.

Crowley claims blot generates when using magic. The magestones Ace, Deuce, and Grim are newly given turn dark as they do a bit of magic for themselves. Crowley explains that those with a lot of magical potential need to be careful not to use too much magic or else it'll have negative effects, much like Riddle in Book 1. According to Crowley, overblot happens when you overuse magic.

But Book 2 has a contradiction in it: Ruggie is doing all the magic heavy lifting. He's constantly using his Ultimate Magic to act out Leona's plan. He uses a potion to triple his power and creates a massive stampede of people with magic, but who is the character who overblots later on? Leona- who doesn't use any of his magic until just before he overblots. He doesn't use magic, but he is brought to the brink of desperation and reminded of all his fears and insecurities.

The Blot

Crowley told us too much magic at once causes overblot, but we've seen seven times now how that's not actually the case. Each overblotter was brought to the brink. They were desperate, scared, anxious, isolated- these negative emotions brought them to overblotting. And though their lives were at risk, each overblotter was at their most powerful in the midst of it.

In each case, the person in question was close to achieving their ultimate goals. Riddle wanted perfection and order. Leona wanted to finally be worthy of a win at any cost. Azul wanted power over others because he had been isolated in the past. Jamil wanted freedom and to make his achievements known. Vil wanted real recognition. Idia didn't want to feel lonely again. Malleus wanted to keep his family together. In the moments before they overblot, their dreams are snatched away from them. In desperation, they have nothing else to lose.

Using blot doesn't necessarily lead to overblot, but increases the risk. It puts the user in a position where they're more vulnerable to fears and depression. It's why Crowley's advice for clearing blot in a magestone is just to rest, eat well, and take care of yourself- all ways to self care when you're mentally unwell.

To use light magic- the magic of the wish and the dream- is to put trust in others and to use joy and positivity and hope to achieve your goals. Using blot to the point of overblot is giving into desperation and fear and isolation.

And that is why Silver, Kalim, and Rook are the chess pieces: they- or their magic rather- are the key to defeating Malleus. The day will be saved by hope and joy and friendship. It's so very "my friends are my power" and so very cliche Disney and I can't wait to read up to the very end.

[pixiedurango]

If you wouldn't mind, I'd appreciate a letter from Illario to Lucanis that is basically him wondering how the hell his awkward cousin managed to attract a hottie like Rook De Riva. (Bonus points for it being my Rook, Adava. I've posted a couple screenshot archives of her.) Thank you very much! This is such a wonderful and fun thing you're doing for the community!

Ding Dong. Another special delivery from the Antivan Postal Service.

We all know Illario is a yapper... this may be the reason why this letter is so crazy long. It's a bit more than just the one requested topic, I hope you don't mind, but I felt, that even Illario would not just kick down the door and starts asking awkward questions about his cousin's love-life. I honestly can't figure, how Lucanis would even answer this letter... Anyway, enjoy!

Transcript:

Cousin, I hope you don’t mind me, bothering you. I know the new First Talon is still saving the world and has probably not the time and even less patience to read from a despicable criminal anyway. Even (or rather because) said criminal is your blood and the closest thing to family you’ll ever have. Beside of course our dear Caterina, who naturally sends her regards (because this way she’s excused to write a letter to you herself. Which of course she would never confirm, and I would NEVER even think. Huh, who wrote that?)

I spend my time doing paperwork for the Diamond recently, since Viago could not be bothered to supervise me all day and night (which I don’t take offensive, I would not want to be my watchdog, either.) Of course no one gives me a contract anymore, maybe there are some with my name on it, but I fear, you’ll find that name in an unfamiliar spot there. No wonder, Viago is paranoid, that something might get out of hand. Which would make him fail his first ever contract from the new First Talon by losing his ward (that would be me).

Not that I wish for this to happen, but then, what is life without the roofs of Treviso in the moonlight, its markets and cafés. The canals and gondolas and the beautiful people in the streets. While I am stuck in the belly of the Diamond. Copying inventory lists.

Anyway, how’s your days? And I mean the parts we don’t get to read in the gazettes or war reports. Allow me to live a little through your new life. I want to know about hat Lighthouse you’re residing in. Living in the Fade is such a weird concept on its own – but being there stuck with a bunch of non-Antivans who are each so different and unique, but you’re still all on the same contract - that sounds like an interesting experience. And they are all so stunningly beautiful and exciting personalities.

Speaking of exciting: Send my kindest regards to that divine but harsh Tevinter detective if you don’t mind, my brother. I’d be very intrigued to get to know other Tevinter people. For a wider perspective, maybe if you want to call it that?

And no, I’m not trying to make a joke here. Or try to push a shady agenda. I just feel that my choices of people from the Imperium was not the… most educated one.

You know what? Never mind, you shouldn’t have to bother with such silly requests and why I feel to ask them from you.

Better we hold onto our words about the things past until we can exchange them in person.

But, you are aware that I simply could have made up a story to make you introduce me to her, right? Or, even better, I just could have written to your Tevinter friend right away, instead of asking you to give my regards…

Speaking of friends. Must be all new and awkward for you, cousin. I can’t remember you having any close acquaintances ever, at all, when we grew up. I would never have thought, you’d have that in you.

Of course now, this all new YOU will not have any more use for your poor cousin - who’s fallen from grace, to do all the nasty ice breaking and socializing for you. And we were such a successful double like that.

Remember that wigmaker job? Vyranthium, I guess. It got you your, moniker, right? Demon of Vyranthium. Just like a creepy foreshadowing, don’t you think? Anyway, what was I talking about? Ah!

You did all the bloody work back then, I happily give you that, but without me? Way more complicated it would have been, I dare say. And even more dangerous as it was already.

Cousin, just think about it. We could rule Antiva together. Or just retire and be the rulers of our own court, whereever that may be - and do what ever we please.

Or did you eventually make peace with being the one in charge? First Talon! So much responsibility. And so large boots to fill.

May Caterina continue to live and rule on for many many more years to come. So you don’t have to step up entirely. Letting her continue to draw strings in the shadows, while you being the representative and handsome young face of the Antivan Crows. That was a clever move from the old girl. Or was it yours? Either way. She could have all that with less drama and an even prettier face, far more willing, to put up with her and her attics. But, well, here we are.

Sorry, I fell back into ramblings about things again, that should be topic for us talking in person. Forgive me. How did I get there in the first place… I have no idea. Maybe this gives you a hint, of just HOW boring the paperwork is, I get to do here. I start yapping. In a letter.

Before I end this pointless lament, cousin, brother! I want to congratulate you. Honestly. Of course, only if it's true, what’s going round within the Diamond and probably the salons of Treviso’s nobility, too. That the new First Talon, known to be the chastest of all Crows, finally decided to seriously court someone. And not only that. It’s even reciprocated this time, as we hear.

A strategic bond with the House of the 5th Talon? I hear that not few people are taking it this way.

But I know you better, cousin. You’d never engage into such an endeavor, when it’s not playing out like in your silly romance novels. (Yes, of course I know what you always hid between your textbooks and under the mattress. Kitsch!) But well, to each their own, I guess. You the books and me the real experience. But you seem to finally getting there, as it seems. Tell me everything, brother! I’ve witnessed you yapping about coffee and kisses goodbye and smarmy stuff like that. You were really into that de Riva girl, right from the start. There goes my last hope, that Adava had, or would ever discover, a soft spot for me behind her wall of professionalism and all business. Just joking, of course, I’m happy for you both. I mean it.

Just don’t let your heart and your… midsection get into the way of a contract. Which in your case would very much unfortunate for all of Thedas. But who am I to give you advice of matters of the heart… (or the midsection) My latest choices weren’t the smartest, either.

Before I end up filling a journal here, I’ll end now. If you want, write me back, I really want to hear about your life and could use any distraction. We’re family, after all. - Illario

Find the other letters here

[angelpuns]

Time for thoughts about Todd Au Leo:

- he has as much insomnia as any other Leo, but he plays it off as being productive. So he's always running around working. It usually isn't as noticeable, but when he has to work a lot AND run around New York with the bros AND go to school, it eventually becomes obvious how little he's sleeping.

- I watched the Clothes Don't make the Turtle and Leo would be almost as difficult to break out if the spell as Donnie, but only because he's having a great time trying on newer clothes ( since most of his are hand me downs from Todd or bought secondhand )

- also he still loves magic. He was definitely more into it when he was younger and had more time, he was probably even in a magic club at school. Nowadays he doesn't spend much time on it, but when he gets the sword from Draxum he does spend several sleepless nights studying some books about mystic powers ( which he also got from Draxum)

- even though this Leo has slightly less self esteem issues/dependence on his brothers, his issues during the movie would be similar. But this time its more of ' I have to do what's right' situation than a ' its not about me situation'

- Leo def joins then for Snow Day, but doesn't side with either of then on his favorite JJ movie, cause he has a different favorite. Chaos ensues.

- I think I might do something where Leo is more involved with the armor somehow, since he's playing for both sides. idk, but for sure him and Splinter at the battle nexus happens, but there's a lot more arguing. Leo's plan works and Splinter is impressed, but Leo is a little upset that Splinter clearly doesn't trust him/like him. Idk I just think their dynamic is interesting since Splinter won't really duly believe Leo is his son until like....the end of S2. And the only reason he believes it is cause of the Hamato Ninpo and all that :)

[blob-with-a-pencil]

What's the origin of your blog name?: ive always imagined myself as a blob whenever i feel strong emotions and i like drawing so i kinda put those two together and.. here we are :)

OTP(s)+Ship Name: i love gay ships a lot, especially mlm, so i guess solangelo, superbat, drarry (i stumble upon it sometimes so its kinda a guilty pleasure..), and lowkey that one captain and doctor in a story book im reading who have such immense chemistry. i cant.

Favourite colour: blood red, persian red, blue, purple, black, and gold✨ i also like pink too! tho not really a favourite

Favourite game: GHARTIC PHONE OMG I COULD PLAY THAT SHIT FOR HOURS- and probably among us, minecraft(i haven't played in a looong time) and roblox!

Song stuck in your head: never enough from the greatest showman and tv by mico

Weirdest trait/habit: i bite shit and i eat random things

Hobbies: doodling, writing (most of it is stored in my brain file room), crying, eating, singing, reading:)

If you work, what's your profession?: sir, this is a school, and i am a student. /sillh

If you could have any job you wish, what would it be?: maybe an actor, or psychologist. maybe even detective, i dunno.

Something you're good at: i mean, im pretty good at drawing

Something you're bad at: probably time management, focusing on something, PE, keeping my emotions in check, ordering at coffee shops (i swear, i always stutter), and doing anything right

Something you love: talking to my friends:)) and imagining scenarios that will never happen.

Something you could talk about for hours off the cuff: probably crime cases, if you give me a specific one. and how to apologize properly for something without saying ‘Oh, im sorry you feel that way’. and things about psychology (kind of)

Something you hate: when people think its okay to act like dicks for absolutely no reason at all

Something you collect: i don't really collect stuff? but I've got journals and books

Something you forget: a lot

What's your love language?: I CRAVE THY TOUCH DEAR COMPANION. words of affirmation and quality time too

Favourite movie/show: Percy Jackson, Adams Project, BLOOD OF ZEUSSS

Favourite food: T U N A 🐟

Favourite animal: oh my freaking gosh i lub snakes, birds, cats and any sea creature

What were you like as a child?: probably the brightest star, creative, loud, and always wanted to play. a bit dumb tho.

Favourite subject at school: science, maths (no im not kidding, i love math), arts, and home economics

Least favourite subject: FUCKING PHYSICAL EDUCATION and history.

What's your best character trait?: im supportive? and im smart (kinda ig)

What's your worst character trait?: i snap easily (irl) and i care too much

If you could change any detail of your life right now, what would it be?: uhhmmm i would like to have less problems in the family

If you could travel in time, who would you like to meet?: my grandfather on my moms side, i would like to punch him in the jaw. for the shit. he did.

Tag as many mutuals as you want! (no pressure):

@itsmylovedaydreamdreamdream @peapea-0405 @cceanvvaves @childofthewargod @darkly-stagnating-fish-tank @daonedaonlysk

Get to know your mutuals!

What's the origin of your blog title? When I was in middle school, someone told me "you dress so goth, but your personality is so happy. You're like a really cheerful grim reaper. A joyful soul collector." And that's been my username for most everything ever since!

OTP(s) + Shipname: Oooh, right now it's Jayvik, and tbh I can't think of another one, this is one of the first ships I've been really really into tbh. Other dynamics focused on my blog have actually been more platonic, like Irondad

Favorite color: Red!

Favorite game: Dungeons and Dragons! Both as a player, and DM!

Song stuck in your head: The Challenge - EPIC

Weirdest habit/trait? I download thousands of still frames of tv shows that I love so I can make memes out of them. But I have to sift through and delete all the pictures that are blurry or unnecessary, which takes hours. I think it's super fun because I'm autistic and really enjoy sorting stuff lol

Hobbies: Writing, playing DnD, making memes, and hanging out with my friends!

If you work, what's your profession? Not so much a profession lol, I work at a toy store. It's a part time job while I'm in college, studying to be a radiologist!

If you could have any job you wish, what would it be? Realistically? Radiologist. But ANY job I wish? Professional DM or Professional DnD player, like the people on Dropout or Critical Role haha

Something you're good at: I'm good at writing stories! I can write them well and write things that make people feel deep emotions, and I like that.

Something you're bad at: Recognizing when someone doesn't want help haha. I tend to try and fix things or help people when they just want to vent, and it ends up frustrating for both of us.

Something you love: I love stories. Any kind, I love so so many

Something you could talk about for hours off the cuff: My favorite shows and stories, my dnd campaigns and characters, my stories and ideas

Something you hate: Fascism. Bigotry. Willful ignorance. Fearmongering. Propaganda.

Something you collect: Dice!! I'm a dice goblin for sure haha

Something you forget: I often forget chores unfortunately

What's your love language? Physical touch and acts of service

Favorite movie/show: Ooh right now it's definitely Arcane haha

Favorite food: Sushi!

Favorite animal: Cats!

What were you like as a child? In a word? Unwell haha. I'm a good bit better now, still struggling with a lot, but better than I used to do

Favorite subject at school? English, I was always good at that class

Least favorite subject: Chemistry. I hate that shit so much lol

What's your best character trait? I think that I'm kind and willing to stand up for others

What's your worst character trait? I can be disrespectful to some types of spirituality unfortunately. It just doesn't make logical sense to me. I have two friends that are fully convinced that a cursed doll gave some youtuber testicular cancer. And I just can't see the logic or critical thought in that

If you could change any detail of your life right now, what would it be? Mmm. All of fascism shit is definitely damaging my calm so I'd love to change that specifically

If you could travel in time, who would you like to meet? Harry Allen. Google him he's a badass transgender cowboy

Tag as as many mutuals as you want!!

@sb-essebi @glitternightingale @blatterpussbunnyfromhell @captainhollowstories @kydrogendragon @misforvendetta @poetryinmotion-author @bocularteletheric @kai-ovillager @thatoneneuvichiliauthor @4amarcanethoughts @alexspearsxoxo @kotonni @buckybucananbarnes @kakesuwolf @martybaker @patheticjayce @sleepycrowhours @aixabi @up-the-bracket @snoopyviktor @emdashflower @humanshapedstress @hellsalore @juuzousmom @softandslow @fangirlshenanigans04 @batmans-attic @lvrstrsh @bluemoyai @tearexxwrites @bodyofvvater @lifeandeathepub @areesespiece @lancesblueazaleas @monaisme @milkywaysipper @carmendyy @tseecka @heazueken @tophat-69 @velocitychroma @prjctdiva @gremlinofchaos @ourvectorviktor @kenjinx @jxmimac @gh0stedvhampir @voxconcordia @arcaneheraldslawyer

ngl I tried to tag ALL my mutuals that I have, but this was how many it allowed me to do before it made me stop lol so here's as many as I could fit!

[sleepyagent]

Sometimes I feel like some things are about me like u usually never tell me youll reply later esp after idk 8pm. So why now? So random. Usually you just roll over, next day, next moin, new chance to reply or not. Most often not anyway unless i repeat.

But again ppl tend to think in ego centric ways and it may just be conceited of me and unreflected to think things r about me at all.

[skrunksthatwunk]

actually i'm still thinking about the moral orel finale.

he has a cross on his wall. do you know how much i think about that bc it's a lot.

a lot of stories ((auto)biographical or fictional) centering escape from abusive/fundamentalist christianity result in the lead characters leaving behind christianity entirely. and that makes complete sense! people often grow disillusioned with the associated systems and beliefs, and when it was something used to hurt them or something so inseparable from their abuse that they can't engage with it without hurting, it makes total sense that they would disengage entirely. and sometimes they just figure out that they don't really believe in god/a christian god/etc. a healthy deconstruction process can sometimes look like becoming an atheist or converting to another religion. it's all case by case. (note: i'm sure this happens with other religions as well, i'm just most familiar with christian versions of this phenomenon).

but in orel's case, his faith was one of the few things that actually brought him comfort and joy. he loved god, y'know? genuinely. and he felt loved by god and supported by him when he had no one else. and the abuses he faced were in how the people in his life twisted religion to control others, to run away from themselves, to shield them from others, etc. and often, orel's conflicts with how they acted out christianity come as a direct result of his purer understanding of god/jesus/whatever ("aren't we supposed to be like this/do that?" met with an adult's excuse for their own behavior or the fastest way they could think of to get orel to leave them alone (i.e. orel saying i thought we weren't supposed to lie? and clay saying uhhh it doesn't count if you're lying to yourself)). the little guy played catch with god instead of his dad, like.. his faith was real, and his love was real. and i think it's a good choice to have orel maintain something that was so important to him and such a grounding, comforting force in the midst of. All That Stuff Moralton Was Up To/Put Him Through. being all about jesus was not the problem, in orel's case.

and i know i'm mostly assuming that orel ended up in a healthier, less rigid version of christianity, but i feel like that's something that was hinted at a lot through the series, that that's the direction he'd go. when he meditates during the prayer bee and accepts stephanie's different way to communicate, incorporating elements of buddhism into his faith; when he has his I AM A CHURCH breakdown (removing himself from the institution and realizing he can be like,, the center of his own faith? taking a more individualistic approach? but Truly Going Through It at the same time), his acceptance (...sometimes) of those who are different from him and condemned by the adults of moralton (stephanie (lesbian icon stephanie my beloved), christina (who's like. just a slightly different form of fundie protestant from him), dr chosenberg (the jewish doctor from otherton in holy visage)). his track record on this isn't perfect, but it gets better as orel starts maturing and picking up on what an absolute shitfest moralton is. it's all ways of questioning the things he's been taught, and it makes sense that it would lead to a bigger questioning as he puts those pieces together more. anyway i think part of his growth is weeding out all the lost commandments of his upbringing and focusing on what faith means to him, and what he thinks it should mean. how he wants to see the world and how he wants to treat people and what he thinks is okay and right, and looking to religion for guidance in that, not as like. a way to justify hurting those he's afraid or resentful of, as his role models did.

he's coming to his own conclusions rather than obediently, unquestioningly taking in what others say. but he's still listening to pick out the parts that make sense to him. (edit/note: and it's his compassion and his faith that are the primary motivations for this questioning and revisal process, both of individual cases and, eventually, the final boss that is christianity.) it makes perfect sense as the conclusion to his character arc and it fits the overall approach of the show far better. it's good is what i'm saying.

and i think it's important to show that kind of ending, because that's a pretty common and equally valid result of deconstruction. and i think it cements the show's treatment of christianity as something that's often (and maybe even easily) exploited, but not something inherently bad. something that can be very positive, even. guys he even has a dog he's not afraid of loving anymore. he's not afraid of loving anyone more than jesus and i don't think it's because he loves this dog less than bartholomew (though he was probably far more desperate for healthy affection and companionship when he was younger). i think it's because he figures god would want him to love that dog. he's choosing to believe that god would want him to love and to be happy and to be kind. he's not afraid of loving in the wrong way do you know how cool that is he's taking back control he's taking back something he loves from his abusers im so normal

[suspiciouscatastrophe]

This post is not about malicious misgendering. It's about people who don't want to misgender you doing it anyway, because it's "too hard for them." It's about allies whose heart is in the right place – or at the very least on its way to the right place, and could use some poking to try harder.

It's inspired by my friend. She knows me from childhood. She loves me dearly. She keeps saying that no matter what happens, I can always run to her and she will help me. She offered me her place in case I got kicked out by my mother.

She also keeps reiterating that she "sees me as a boy." That she knows I am a man. That she wouldn't never want to misgender me on purpose.

It's been about 8 months since I came out to her as a trans man. (And way longer than that since I came out to her as trans in general – it was just that I used to identify as a nonbinary person who was using any pronouns, and I did allow her to stick with she/her for me.)

And yet. She keeps slipping. Not once-per-day slips, either. Several times per conversation. Granted, she is getting much better. She slips less than she used to. I believe she's trying.

And I know it's not just because of how long we have known each other for, but also because of me not passing enough. I came out to her before I started transitioning. When I made some first steps in my social transition and started presenting as masculine as I could, she told me herself that "it made it easier for her to call me a he." She didn't mean it viciously – she believes trans people are who they say they are even pre-transition and even if they don't pass. But it still betrays a degree of passive, deeply ingrained transphobia, her perhaps unrealized belief in universal visual gender markers created and reinforced by the cispatriarchy. She wants to say "he," but I keep giving her "she" vibes, so to say. Which is not my fault – I deserve to be gendered correctly. Everyone does, cis or trans. Transitioning or non-transitioning. Pre-HRT or on it. She needs to work on that.

And it's not like it's hard. In my social circle, only very few people are cis or post-transition. Most of the people I talk to daily are either pre-transition, in the early stages of transition, or non-transitioning. In the eyes of society around us, none of us passes. We also mostly speak Czech – a language that is heavily gendered. I have never caught myself using the incorrect grammatical forms for anybody.

Granted, I might be speaking out of privilege. I am trans myself (which is not a privilege by any means, but it is probably a favorable position with regards to your ability to be normal about people's pronouns), and I've always been language-oriented. But I don't think I'm a saint or exceptionally talented, so the catch must be somewhere else.

I reiterate, I literally think it's a skill. If it happens to you, practice, practice, practice – and not just speaking, practice thinking about the person you keep misgendering in the correct gendered terms, and then speaking will be easier. Go on the internet and visit trans spaces to learn more about diverse gender experiences and see photos to recalibrate your brain to familiarize yourself with how people of any given gender express themselves. You can do it. You can be the ally you want to be.

Okay. Maybe tonight is my turn to be a bully. Prepare yourselves. Here goes my bully take!

Struggling to gender people correctly because

a) you've known them for a long time pre-transition

b) they don't pass

is a skill issue in either case. Even if you love them and want to be an ally, even if you wouldn't misgender them on purpose – in that case it's not a failing of your morals, it's a failing of your literal skills and habit-forming patterns.

Hone those skills. Break whatever it is in your brain that ties them to their post-birth name/pronouns so strongly. Unlearn the rigid image of what "men" and "women" can and cannot look like. Carve the existence of people who don't fall into either (or fall to both) into your worldview.

Your trans loved ones will appreciate it so much.

[sacchiri]

Hellsing 2002 calendar illustration.

Ein wunderliche und erschröckliche Hystori von einem großen Wüttrich genant Dracole wayda Der do so ganz unkristenliche marrter hat angelegt die mensche, als mit spissen als auch die leut zu Tod geslyffen

A wondrous and frightening story about a great berserk called Dracula the voivode who inflicted such unchristian tortures such as with stakes and also dragged people to death

[xxplastic-cubexx]

talking with my brother and he was like ‘lmao what if they juiced magneto- just a bottle of magneto essence’ like bro i dont think we’re thinking the same thing when you say all that