#Silicon Based Life
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Art by Colin Howard.
#colin howard#doctor who#the hand of fear#eldrad#silicon based life#alien#monster#tom baker#elisabeth sladen#sarah jane smith#vhs
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Thinking about adding silicon based life to my universe so im asking a spec evo subreddit for info on what would be needed to make that happen and such :3
#silicon based life#alien talk#worldbuilding#spec evo#speculative evolution#alien characters#my universe#cybers input
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Don't worry @wizard-legs all the glass sharks I have met are lithovores meaning they eat minerals and other inorganic creatures like crystal crabs. Think about it, they're silicon based lifeforms and you're presumably carbon based, therefore you likely hold as much nutritional value to them as a pile of sand does to you.


I hate Justin McElroy for validating my lifelong fear of invisible ocean creatures in my pool with the ‘glass shark’ bit, because now every time I am in ANY body of water I have to act like I’m not afraid of Glass Shark so it can’t smell my very real fear
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making a little pinned post just for fun :3 this is kind of a trek blog but it’s also my main blog, so there’s sort of a lot going on here
my artblog is @faewildwolf!
^this is what i look like btw. if you even care
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ok sorry but i'm actually devastated they didn't get to do a lifemate ceremony... at the very least i wanted to see them have an earth wedding with shlorpian elements. sad ant with bindle dot jpg
#auaieeaeieie. korvo getting upset they can't do x or y ritual and terry going out to find the closest approximation they can manage on earth#and terry wanting EVERYONE there but knowing korvo might not want chris linus etc there so korvo has to be the one to send them invites...#wait also it's kind of bugging me that they aren't carbon based? could a . i'm guessing they have to be silicon based right. if not carbon#could silicon based life even survive on earth#whatever. there's probably like a shlorp-ion they're based on i mean who give a shit. who GIVE a shit
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Galactic Gazetteer: Kastria

Type: terrestrial planet
Location: Mutter's Spiral
Inhabitants: Kastrians (extinct)
Affiliation: Kingdom of Kastria, c.150 million BC
Visited by: the Fourth Doctor and Sarah-Jane, the Fifth Doctor and co.
Appearances: The Hand of Fear (1976), Eldrad Must Die! (2013 audio)


Fun fact: constantly bombarded by solar winds, leaving the surface lifeless
Another fun fact: Eldrad devised a silicon-based form for the Kastrians and erected solar barriers so that they could survive the winds, but later betrayed them.
#doctor who#galactic gazetteer#fourth doctor#fifth doctor#sarah jane smith#silicon-based life#Mutter's Spiral
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There really should have been more of Sulu fencing down a hallway shirtless though.
the original series of star trek is absolutely my favorite thing bc every episode is like:
-kirk manhandles a penis shaped rock prop for a very long time
-spock dances flamenco
-sulu fences down the hallway shirtless
-episode plot is kirk v massive sentient lump
-kirk tries to explain spock's ears as a childhood accident where he got his head caught in a mechanical rice picker
-on an unrelated note, spock starts wearing a beanie
-redshirts get turned into like. cubes of salt
-uhura defeats a giant green hand by hotwiring the entire comms console
-spock and kirk hold hands
-scotty stops chekov from starting a bar fight with klingons only to immediately start one himself bc the love of his life (the enterprise) gets insulted
-mccoy's fantasies involve meeting characters from alice in wonderland, including a giant anthropomorphic rabbit
-spock's alien sex drive episode
-kirk gets bodyswapped
-gladiator fight episode (1)
-gladiator fight episode (2)
-gladiator fight episode (3)
AND YET, every episode is ALSO like:
-war cannot be reduced to numbers from an outside perspective, because that makes it easier to stomach without change; the horror that is war must be acknowledged in order to make room for peace
-more types of life can be extant than we can conceive, and just because they are different forms of life doesn't make them incapable of prospering
-love cannot be programmed or controlled, and discriminatory hatred is a tool only for death and pain
-cultures that are different than our own are valuable and can be vibrantly rich with history, and judging them before we try to understand and empathize is not only reductive but contemptible
-happiness is something that we have to allow ourselves, and actively seek out, because it can't come to us without work and acknowledgement of our own state of being
-genocide can never be justified, and certainly not even to supposedly save the people that are more "valuable" by any given metric over those who are not, because all lives have worth
anyway the balance of absurdity and meaningfulness gives me life, and we haven't even gotten started on the whale movie lmao
#it only happened the once#Spock having to identify a fake Kirk happened like three times#it says something that the whale movie is one of the good movies#the premise um I mean the concept of the movie#should have made it one of the bad ones because it's so ridiculous#and yet#an episode with a silicon based life form is an example of both
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youtube
huh, film theory made a video on steven universe
#its.... okay?#the narrator did actually watch the show and knew at least some interview info at least#though to spoil the video#the whole point of it is just 'aliens and humans should b e completely incompatible so steven shouldnt have been able to exist'#which... yeah??#its magic you really dont have to make a whole video on it#plus they argue gems are silicon based life forms which is another reason why they would be incompatible with carbon life (humans)#using the fact that garnets are quartzes have silicon#meanwhile diamonds are made out of carbon...#and in a mass calculation tries to have garnet be made out of the actual gemstone garnet???#when their masses change in different situations#though maybe my status as a mega fan makes me way too nitpicky for this video
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What If Nature’s Chemistry Was Different?
Chemistry is the foundation of everything in our universe, from the air we breathe to the water that sustains life. The elements in the periodic table, their interactions, and the rules governing their behavior create the reality we know. But what if the chemistry of nature was entirely different? Imagine a world where water wasn’t H₂O, where carbon wasn’t the foundation of life, or where oxygen…
#Alternative elements in nature#Chemistry#Life without carbon and oxygen#Periodic table with different elements#Silicon-based life possibilities#What if chemistry was different
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“Mynock Hunter” by Colin Geller.
#meckanicalmind#colin geller#star wars#silicon based life#spaceborne life form#alien#creature#monster
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My Star Trek hill I will die on: Bones was right. The Horta shouldn't exist in an oxygen atmosphere, it should just turn into sand. Spock's bit about it surviving briefly is bullshit and they did not explain it to my satisfaction.
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Optimus Tesla Robot - AI Day 2022 Teslabot Robotic Hands in a Heart Shape
by WigOutlet
Optimus Tesla - AI Day 2022 Teslabot Robotic Hands in a Heart Shape
#elon musk#tesla#teslamotors#ai#robotics#robots#androids#silicone based life#wigoutlet#robot#robot girl
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❤︎︎ 𝐕𝐢 𝐰𝐡𝐨 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝓇ℯ𝒶𝓁𝓁𝓎 𝐰𝐢𝐬𝐡𝐞𝐬 𝐬𝐡𝐞 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐟𝐞𝐞𝐥 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐬𝐮𝐜𝐤 𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐩 ❤︎︎
✿❀✿❀✿❀✿❀✿❀✿❀✿❀✿❀✿❀✿❀✿❀✿❀✿❀✿
𝐅𝐭: 𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐩 𝐬𝐮𝐜𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠, 𝐩𝐫𝐚𝐢𝐬𝐞, 𝐜𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐩 𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐝𝐢𝐜𝐤/𝐜𝐨𝐜𝐤, 𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲 𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲 𝐬𝐥𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐬𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐤 𝐢𝐟 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐬𝐪𝐮𝐢𝐧𝐭
𝐅𝐞𝐦!𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫
✿❀✿❀✿❀✿❀✿❀✿❀✿❀✿❀✿❀✿❀✿❀✿❀✿❀✿
Vi who watches one TikTok of a girl complaining that she’ll never get to have her dick sucked and it absolutely changes her life. If we’re being completely honest Vi’s always had a little bit of a thing with your mouth, but she can’t help it. And this has just made it so much worse
So much worse infact that when she gets horny and you’re away, she watches strap sucking videos specifically so she can imagine what you’d look like on your knees taking her. And how heavenly your already magnificent mouth could feel.
And she tries to keep it together, she does. But she’s been extra feral and it’s not hard to pick up on the fact that something’s causing it. Her already crumpling composure all comes toppling down when she goes to show you a fight video she had saved on twitter and it instead opens up to a girl throat fucking her girlfriend with a strap.
It’s dead silent as you piece together what’s really been making her crazy. And she is staring at her phone, she turned it off and chucked it , in abject horror. Not for long though of course.
���Did you wanna try that” She’s gonna cream her pants.
And that’s how you end up here, on your knees, Vi’s black strap within an inch of your face and Vi herself looking just as delicious as usual. Maybe more so, if you’re being honest.
Eyes trailing her body as they make their way up. From the hot pink happy trail that only stops a few centimeters from her belly button to her toned beyond belief torso. I mean abs like hers should be illegal really, and her breasts , god they looked great from this angle.
But more importantly was her eyes, dark with a hunger you’d only seen a few times on her. Taking in every piece of you, and if this was anyone else you’d feel vulnerable, but you don’t, not with her.
“Just gonna stare or you gonna put that pretty mouth to work, babe”
A shiver went down your spine as you leaned forward, grasping the toy at the base and kissing up the side length before coming to the tip. Tapping it on your tongue and giving it a few light licks.
“Don’t tease.” Vi’s voice was tight and barely restrained. She had one hand buried softly in your hair but her grip tightened as she spoke, giving a warning tug.
“Can’t help it,” you gave her a soft smirk “it’s just so fun” at that a sharper tug that had the ghost of a whine leave your mouth. Finally you stopped your teasing, anticipation having brewed enough.
Taking her deeper and deeper as a steady pace before it bottomed out, and you’d be lying if the feeling of Vi’s bush against your nose and the sweet sent of her musk that filled your senses didn’t have you clenching around nothing. Drawing back and repeating until you had a good temp, rubbing and gripping at her trembling thighs to steady yourself.
And Vi, she was in heaven. You’d think this wouldn’t feel that good, that it wouldn’t live up to all the fantasies she’d created in her mind. But if anything, this was better. She had the prettiest girl in the world in front of her , sucking her dick like a porn star, hell she could feel the moans you were trying to muffle vibrating through the silicone and it was doing something fierce to her. But it wasn’t enough.
“Oh fuck, pretty girl you’re doin so good . So fucken good promise , but I need more” Her voice was wrecked , bordering on the line of pathetic. A raspy whiney mess and damn if it wasn’t working for you.
“What’s wrong baby , whaddya need?” You pull back and a line of spit connects your lips to the tip of her cock, almost as thin as her restrain is wearing at the moment. Hand coming to jerk it off. Because despise it being fake, the grinder that lay underneath bumping relentlessly against Vi’s sensitive clit was very real.
“Need to fuck your face” oh this was filthy
“Yeah?”
“Yeah, just fuck. C’mon princess. Don’t tease” Another raspy whine left her lips as her hips bucked forward, and you thighs pressed together to follow.
“Yeah Vi, okay. Fuck my face” it was breathy but just as needy in response and it had her removing her hand from your hair so that it could help the other gather all the fly away and pull it back, becoming a handle of sorts. Mumbling soft but ever so genuine ‘thank you’s.
“Just tap me twice if it’s too much , alright pretty?”
“Alright.”
“Good girl, now open up for me.” She instructed and you obeyed, jaw dropping and tongue out far enough to cover your teeth. The first few were gentle, testing. But after she had it, all bets were off. Hips snapping relentless , silicone bumping against the back of your throat as you tried to suck in tandem. Spit dropping down the sides of your mouth and down your chest.
“Oh that’s so good, doin so good for me , babe. So fucken good”
“God you’re perfect, mouth is perfect, taking me so well”
And when you gagged the first time, she knew she wasn’t lasting long.
“Oh fuck, that’s right pretty girl. Just fucken choke on my cock.” She was practically bent over cradling your head as she humped the toy into your mouth. Coil in her stomach tightening with every thrust, threatening to snap with every moan you let out in response .
It came as no surprise to the both of you when she let out whine turned growl as she chased and then road out her high. Grinding against the bumper and simultaneously choking you on her cock. A few more jerky and not nearly as strong thrusts before she was pulling out. Hazy and in complete awe of you. Even as you were covered in spit and blinking away tears.
“Too rough?”
“Never”
“Good.” Before she was helping you stand to carrying you to the bedroom.
“Did so good , babe. I’m gonna fuck you till you see stars tonight.”
✿❀✿❀✿❀✿❀✿❀✿❀✿❀✿❀✿❀✿❀✿❀✿❀✿❀✿
𝐋𝐢𝐤𝐞𝐬, 𝐫𝐞𝐛𝐥𝐨𝐠𝐬, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐬 𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐝 ❤︎︎
𝐌𝐲 𝐫𝐞𝐪𝐬 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐨𝐩𝐞𝐧 𝐬𝐨 𝐜𝐡𝐞𝐜𝐤 𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐦𝐲 𝐫𝐮𝐥𝐞𝐬 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 𝐢𝐟 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐝❤︎︎
#vi arcane fluff#vi arcane imagine#vi arcane#vi x reader#vi lol#vi league of legends#violet arcane#violet x reader#violet x you#vi x you#wlw smut#Wlw#lesbian#violet smut#vi smut#vi arcane smut#violet arcane smut#lesbian smut#wlw fanfic#vi drabble#strap on fic#arcane smut#arcane drabbles#arcane Drabble#arcane violet#arcane fic#arcane x reader#arcane x you#arcane x female reader
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watched the annihilation movie right after reading the book, damn that shit was mid
#hey guys i got a great idea#you know the movie the entire aesthetic of which is rot and decay as a kind of rebirth?#what if the monster at the end was a silicon based life form#that's a new concept in scifi#and we could have the tower be a mini tunnel lined with crystals instead of the LIVING FUCKING ORGANISM it is in the book
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Tesla's Dieselgate

Elon Musk lies a lot. He lies about being a “utopian socialist.” He lies about being a “free speech absolutist.” He lies about which companies he founded:
https://www.businessinsider.com/tesla-cofounder-martin-eberhard-interview-history-elon-musk-ev-market-2023-2 He lies about being the “chief engineer” of those companies:
https://www.quora.com/Was-Elon-Musk-the-actual-engineer-behind-SpaceX-and-Tesla
He lies about really stupid stuff, like claiming that comsats that share the same spectrum will deliver steady broadband speeds as they add more users who each get a narrower slice of that spectrum:
https://www.eff.org/wp/case-fiber-home-today-why-fiber-superior-medium-21st-century-broadband
The fundamental laws of physics don’t care about this bullshit, but people do. The comsat lie convinced a bunch of people that pulling fiber to all our homes is literally impossible — as though the electrical and phone lines that come to our homes now were installed by an ancient, lost civilization. Pulling new cabling isn’t a mysterious art, like embalming pharaohs. We do it all the time. One of the poorest places in America installed universal fiber with a mule named “Ole Bub”:
https://www.newyorker.com/tech/annals-of-technology/the-one-traffic-light-town-with-some-of-the-fastest-internet-in-the-us
Previous tech barons had “reality distortion fields,” but Musk just blithely contradicts himself and pretends he isn’t doing so, like a budget Steve Jobs. There’s an entire site devoted to cataloging Musk’s public lies:
https://elonmusk.today/
But while Musk lacks the charm of earlier Silicon Valley grifters, he’s much better than they ever were at running a long con. For years, he’s been promising “full self driving…next year.”
https://pluralistic.net/2022/10/09/herbies-revenge/#100-billion-here-100-billion-there-pretty-soon-youre-talking-real-money
He’s hasn’t delivered, but he keeps claiming he has, making Teslas some of the deadliest cars on the road:
https://www.washingtonpost.com/technology/2023/06/10/tesla-autopilot-crashes-elon-musk/
Tesla is a giant shell-game masquerading as a car company. The important thing about Tesla isn’t its cars, it’s Tesla’s business arrangement, the Tesla-Financial Complex:
https://pluralistic.net/2021/11/24/no-puedo-pagar-no-pagara/#Rat
Once you start unpacking Tesla’s balance sheets, you start to realize how much the company depends on government subsidies and tax-breaks, combined with selling carbon credits that make huge, planet-destroying SUVs possible, under the pretense that this is somehow good for the environment:
https://pluralistic.net/2021/04/14/for-sale-green-indulgences/#killer-analogy
But even with all those financial shenanigans, Tesla’s got an absurdly high valuation, soaring at times to 1600x its profitability:
https://pluralistic.net/2021/01/15/hoover-calling/#intangibles
That valuation represents a bet on Tesla’s ability to extract ever-higher rents from its customers. Take Tesla’s batteries: you pay for the battery when you buy your car, but you don’t own that battery. You have to rent the right to use its full capacity, with Tesla reserving the right to reduce how far you go on a charge based on your willingness to pay:
https://memex.craphound.com/2017/09/10/teslas-demon-haunted-cars-in-irmas-path-get-a-temporary-battery-life-boost/
That’s just one of the many rent-a-features that Tesla drivers have to shell out for. You don’t own your car at all: when you sell it as a used vehicle, Tesla strips out these features you paid for and makes the next driver pay again, reducing the value of your used car and transfering it to Tesla’s shareholders:
https://www.theverge.com/2020/2/6/21127243/tesla-model-s-autopilot-disabled-remotely-used-car-update
To maintain this rent-extraction racket, Tesla uses DRM that makes it a felony to alter your own car’s software without Tesla’s permission. This is the root of all autoenshittification:
https://pluralistic.net/2023/07/24/rent-to-pwn/#kitt-is-a-demon
This is technofeudalism. Whereas capitalists seek profits (income from selling things), feudalists seek rents (income from owning the things other people use). If Telsa were a capitalist enterprise, then entrepreneurs could enter the market and sell mods that let you unlock the functionality in your own car:
https://pluralistic.net/2020/06/11/1-in-3/#boost-50
But because Tesla is a feudal enterprise, capitalists must first secure permission from the fief, Elon Musk, who decides which companies are allowed to compete with him, and how.
Once a company owns the right to decide which software you can run, there’s no limit to the ways it can extract rent from you. Blocking you from changing your device’s software lets a company run overt scams on you. For example, they can block you from getting your car independently repaired with third-party parts.
But they can also screw you in sneaky ways. Once a device has DRM on it, Section 1201 of the DMCA makes it a felony to bypass that DRM, even for legitimate purposes. That means that your DRM-locked device can spy on you, and because no one is allowed to explore how that surveillance works, the manufacturer can be incredibly sloppy with all the personal info they gather:
https://www.cnbc.com/2019/03/29/tesla-model-3-keeps-data-like-crash-videos-location-phone-contacts.html
All kinds of hidden anti-features can lurk in your DRM-locked car, protected from discovery, analysis and criticism by the illegality of bypassing the DRM. For example, Teslas have a hidden feature that lets them lock out their owners and summon a repo man to drive them away if you have a dispute about a late payment:
https://tiremeetsroad.com/2021/03/18/tesla-allegedly-remotely-unlocks-model-3-owners-car-uses-smart-summon-to-help-repo-agent/
DRM is a gun on the mantlepiece in Act I, and by Act III, it goes off, revealing some kind of ugly and often dangerous scam. Remember Dieselgate? Volkswagen created a line of demon-haunted cars: if they thought they were being scrutinized (by regulators measuring their emissions), they switched into a mode that traded performance for low emissions. But when they believed themselves to be unobserved, they reversed this, emitting deadly levels of NOX but delivering superior mileage.
The conversion of the VW diesel fleet into mobile gas-chambers wouldn’t have been possible without DRM. DRM adds a layer of serious criminal jeopardy to anyone attempting to reverse-engineer and study any device, from a phone to a car. DRM let Apple claim to be a champion of its users’ privacy even as it spied on them from asshole to appetite:
https://pluralistic.net/2022/11/14/luxury-surveillance/#liar-liar
Now, Tesla is having its own Dieselgate scandal. A stunning investigation by Steve Stecklow and Norihiko Shirouzu for Reuters reveals how Tesla was able to create its own demon-haunted car, which systematically deceived drivers about its driving range, and the increasingly desperate measures the company turned to as customers discovered the ruse:
https://www.reuters.com/investigates/special-report/tesla-batteries-range/
The root of the deception is very simple: Tesla mis-sells its cars by falsely claiming ranges that those cars can’t attain. Every person who ever bought a Tesla was defrauded.
But this fraud would be easy to detect. If you bought a Tesla rated for 353 miles on a charge, but the dashboard range predictor told you that your fully charged car could only go 150 miles, you’d immediately figure something was up. So your Telsa tells another lie: the range predictor tells you that you can go 353 miles.
But again, if the car continued to tell you it has 203 miles of range when it was about to run out of charge, you’d figure something was up pretty quick — like, the first time your car ran out of battery while the dashboard cheerily informed you that you had 203 miles of range left.
So Teslas tell a third lie: when the battery charge reached about 50%, the fake range is replaced with the real one. That way, drivers aren’t getting mass-stranded by the roadside, and the scam can continue.
But there’s a new problem: drivers whose cars are rated for 353 miles but can’t go anything like that far on a full charge naturally assume that something is wrong with their cars, so they start calling Tesla service and asking to have the car checked over.
This creates a problem for Tesla: those service calls can cost the company $1,000, and of course, there’s nothing wrong with the car. It’s performing exactly as designed. So Tesla created its boldest fraud yet: a boiler-room full of anti-salespeople charged with convincing people that their cars weren’t broken.
This new unit — the “diversion team” — was headquartered in a Nevada satellite office, which was equipped with a metal xylophone that would be rung in triumph every time a Tesla owner was successfully conned into thinking that their car wasn’t defrauding them.
When a Tesla owner called this boiler room, the diverter would run remote diagnostics on their car, then pronounce it fine, and chide the driver for having energy-hungry driving habits (shades of Steve Jobs’s “You’re holding it wrong”):
https://www.wired.com/2010/06/iphone-4-holding-it-wrong/
The drivers who called the Diversion Team weren’t just lied to, they were also punished. The Tesla app was silently altered so that anyone who filed a complaint about their car’s range was no longer able to book a service appointment for any reason. If their car malfunctioned, they’d have to request a callback, which could take several days.
Meanwhile, the diverters on the diversion team were instructed not to inform drivers if the remote diagnostics they performed detected any other defects in the cars.
The diversion team had a 750 complaint/week quota: to juke this stat, diverters would close the case for any driver who failed to answer the phone when they were eventually called back. The center received 2,000+ calls every week. Diverters were ordered to keep calls to five minutes or less.
Eventually, diverters were ordered to cease performing any remote diagnostics on drivers’ cars: a source told Reuters that “Thousands of customers were told there is nothing wrong with their car” without any diagnostics being performed.
Predicting EV range is an inexact science as many factors can affect battery life, notably whether a journey is uphill or downhill. Every EV automaker has to come up with a figure that represents some kind of best guess under a mix of conditions. But while other manufacturers err on the side of caution, Tesla has the most inaccurate mileage estimates in the industry, double the industry average.
Other countries’ regulators have taken note. In Korea, Tesla was fined millions and Elon Musk was personally required to state that he had deceived Tesla buyers. The Korean regulator found that the true range of Teslas under normal winter conditions was less than half of the claimed range.
Now, many companies have been run by malignant narcissists who lied compulsively — think of Thomas Edison, archnemesis of Nikola Tesla himself. The difference here isn’t merely that Musk is a deeply unfit monster of a human being — but rather, that DRM allows him to defraud his customers behind a state-enforced opaque veil. The digital computers at the heart of a Tesla aren’t just demons haunting the car, changing its performance based on whether it believes it is being observed — they also allow Musk to invoke the power of the US government to felonize anyone who tries to peer into the black box where he commits his frauds.
If you'd like an essay-formatted version of this post to read or share, here's a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:
https://pluralistic.net/2023/07/28/edison-not-tesla/#demon-haunted-world
This Sunday (July 30) at 1530h, I’m appearing on a panel at Midsummer Scream in Long Beach, CA, to discuss the wonderful, award-winning “Ghost Post” Haunted Mansion project I worked on for Disney Imagineering.
Image ID [A scene out of an 11th century tome on demon-summoning called 'Compendium rarissimum totius Artis Magicae sistematisatae per celeberrimos Artis hujus Magistros. Anno 1057. Noli me tangere.' It depicts a demon tormenting two unlucky would-be demon-summoners who have dug up a grave in a graveyard. One summoner is held aloft by his hair, screaming; the other screams from inside the grave he is digging up. The scene has been altered to remove the demon's prominent, urinating penis, to add in a Tesla supercharger, and a red Tesla Model S nosing into the scene.]
Image: Steve Jurvetson (modified) https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Tesla_Model_S_Indoors.jpg
CC BY 2.0 https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0/deed.en
#pluralistic#steve stecklow#autoenshittification#norihiko shirouzu#reuters#you're holding it wrong#r2r#right to repair#range rage#range anxiety#grifters#demon-haunted world#drm#tpms#1201#dmca 1201#tesla#evs#electric vehicles#ftc act section 5#unfair and deceptive practices#automotive#enshittification#elon musk
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in the late 2030s, noosphere analysts in the Unified Irish Republic made a breakthrough: by injecting the souls of people on their deathbeds with specific radioisotopes, they could filter through the greater noosphere for that marker to identify where the soul ended up. the first test subject's soul reappearing in the Mesozoic Era, in turn, led to the discovery that reincarnation is not only real but completely unbound by time or space: upon death, your consciousness is instantly transferred to some other vessel somewhere/when in spacetime at the moment it attains cognizance.
after further research, it was determined that 1. this jump is as close to random as modern nooscopes can measure and 2. the minimum threshold for "cognizance" is incredibly low. this means that most people will end up reincarnating as some kind of insect or vermin, with "human surviving to the age where they start becoming self-aware" being a vanishingly rare outcome. there was also an issue where something like 15% of test subjects ended up returning identical signatures indicating they had been reincarnated somewhere around Orion's Belt, but this was chalked up to a combination of interference from dark matter and insufficiently accurate tools.
this eventually led to the formation of a new religion asserting that there is only one individual "consciousness" in the universe, and that all beings that have ever existed or will ever exist (including you) are all simply different iterations of this one consciousness. the Great Schism of 2037 resulted in this religion fragmenting into two sects due to an argument over the existence of immortal or timeless beings: the larger faction (called "Wombists" due to their habit of referring to the universe as an egg or womb) held that true immortality was impossible in this realm and the endgame for the One True Consciousness (i.e. you) after living every life in the universe was to ascend to godhood; whereas the smaller faction (referred to by the history books as simply "Heretics" after their eradication for heresy) argued that there was exactly one (1) Truly Immortal Being and that the endgame of the One True Consciousness was to end up trapped in this body/life and eventually go mad with power.
in 2041, after the existence of dark matter was conclusively debunked, Cuban astral projectioneers managed to resolve the apparent discrepancy with the earlier Irish dataset: there was, in fact, a planet near Orion's Belt host to an incomprehensibly vast biomass. further expeditions revealed this life to be trillions upon trillions of silicon-based microscopic organisms that were effectively biologically immortal, with metabolic cycles operating on the timescale of stars. the implications of this prompted a second minor schism within the church, since the Wombist line of reasoning implied that 15% of all reincarnations were billion-year jail sentences in the body of an alien tardigrade.
at 1:07 PM GMT on July 27th, 2043, a Mexican observatory detected evidence of a massive eel-like entity emerging from the asteroid belt. it had yet to receive an official name before rendering the issue moot by consuming the Earth whole approximately 28 minutes later.
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