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writemywaytoyourheart · 4 years ago

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Aim For The Heart | Chapter 1: At First Sight

Pairing: hitman!jk x female reader

Genre: E2L, romance, angst, drama

WC: 4.5k

Warnings for this chapter: alcohol consumption, language, stalking kind of? I think that's all lol. Pls let me know if there is anything else I should put.

tag list; @teresaisla @hopekookies @moonchild1 @barbellastyles98 @ggukkieland @mwitsmejk @yukiehyukie

summary; Jeon Jungkook is an infamous hitman, known for his inability to fail at whatever job is thrown his way. At least, up until now. Y/n, a kind-hearted and full of life teacher, is his newest target. Jeon isn't sure who would put a hit on this seemingly innocent girl, but fortunately, that isn't his problem. All he has to do is pull the trigger.

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A bright smile graces your features as you tuck the little star-shaped peanut butter and jelly sandwiches into a tiny container, just barely getting two of them to fit as you squish them down a tad bit in order to get the lid clipped on.

Then you grab a little tangerine and a cheese stick to drop into your lunch bag along with the sandwiches, counting the number of items aloud to yourself as they make themselves at home and then you zip it all up.

"Th-There we go!" You lift your lunch for the day in triumph.

Your phone startles you when it starts to ring, then you grapple in your purse to find it. You pull it out and answer right before the last ring.

"Hello?"

"Hey, girl! Are you ready to go? I'm downstairs." The voice of your best friend comes through the phone and you look at the clock on your microwave. You stare at the little black screen, confused as to why the time isn't showing up before remembering that you were never able to figure out how to display the clock when you bought the microwave three years ago. So, you hold your phone out to look at the time.

6:32

"Oh geez! I didn't r-realize the time. I'll be d-down in a minute, k?" You say, earning a lighthearted laugh from the girl on the other end.

"Take your time, hun. I'm not in any rush."

You thank her quickly and hang up, then you run to your room to grab your favorite pink cardigan and throw it on over your white shirt. As you're hurrying out and grabbing your lunch, you stumble and knock your knee into an open lower cabinet that you had forgotten to close the previous night after pulling a pan from it to make dinner.

"Ouch!" You hiss in pain and rub the sore spot, although it does nothing to ease the ache. Then you grab your purse and run outside, almost forgetting to lock the door. But you remember just in time and clumsily lock it before rushing down the stairs leading to the parking lot of your apartment complex.

Your best friend, Mina, is laughing. You can see her through the windshield as she waves to you. Lifting a hand to wave back, you don't realize in time that your arms are full. You drop your lunchbox and have to crouch to get it again, only taking up even more of your time.

But Mina finds it hilarious and tells you so as soon as you slide into the car and fumble with your seatbelt to get it buckled.

"Honestly, ___. I can't believe you're still single. If I wasn't straight as a board, I'd be head over heels for you and all your shenanigans." She states in a matter-of-fact tone as she pulls out of the parking spot.

A blush creeps up your neck and you try to laugh it off, "D-Don't be silly." You whisper, turning your gaze outside to look at the fluffy white clouds decorating the sky beautifully. You smile and lean your forehead against the glass as you imagine lying on a soft cloud, just drifting in the air.

"If you c-could go anywhere at all, where would y-you go?" You ask Mina suddenly, turning to her. Her eyes are focused on the road but she bites her lip in thought at your question. "Mm, probably Italy. What about you?" She's used to your sudden questions and ramblings, so she smiles when you start to go off.

"I'd wanna go up in the c-clouds. I wanna sit on one and maybe even see a r-rainbow up close! I wonder if I could slide down the rainbow..." Your brows furrow in deep thought. "Or would I f-fall?" You turn to her again and she glances over to see your signature puppy dog eyes that you use when you are either confused, upset, or want something.

Mina turns back to the road, a tiny ache in her heart that she hides with a bright smile, "Girl, you would ride that rainbow straight down into a pot of gold!"

"Really?" Your eyes widen and you feel your heart lift at the image.

She nods and you giggle happily, "You can come w-with me, Mina." You say confidently, your gaze turning back to the sky. "We can sleep in the clouds and slide down rainbows for the rest of f-forever."

"Sounds like a deal."

By the time Mina pulls up to the school, you've discussed everything you'd do up in the clouds and what you'd eat when you're hungry (stardust, you've decided, is the best meal anyone could eat.)

You unbuckle and gather your things. Then you remember something and turn back to Mina, "Oh yeah. W-When are you leaving on your business trip?" You ask a tinge of sadness in your voice.

"This weekend," Mina says solemnly. "I'm sorry I won't be able to drive you for a while. I'll be gone for a month this time."

That makes your heart sting but you manage a small smile, "D-Don't worry about me. I can walk! I'm gonna m-miss you though."

"I'll miss you too, buttercup. We'll hang out this Friday night before I leave the next day. How about that?" Mina asks kindly.

You nod enthusiastically and she smiles, "Ok, get your butt in there before you're late! The bell rings in half an hour and you can't be late on a Monday." She urges you and you nod, hopping out of the car and thanking her again for the ride, reassuring her that you'll walk home from work today.

You blow her a kiss and she laughs as you turn and hurry into the school.

You're all set up only a few minutes before the kids are supposed to arrive, so you go onto Pinterest and look through your fairytale boards, feeling a little spark of joy in your chest.

A couple of minutes later, the kids start streaming through the door, greeting you with the same amount of enthusiasm as you greet them. Your kiddos love you so much that all the other teachers are jealous and they let you know it every day. Of course, you have the sweetest kindergarteners and they're always the best for you.

"Hello, Teacher! Good morning Miss ___! Teacher, look at my new haircut!"

"Hi, Jina! Hello M-Minhhyuk! Kun, your new haircut l-looks so good!" All the kids have bright smiles on their faces by the time they've settled in their seats.

You always start the day off by getting everyone to stand and do a few stretches, then you sing the nursery rhymes you learned yesterday and start learning a new one. You honestly have as much fun as the kids during the school day.

"Ok, l-little ducklings, have a seat!" You get their attention and they immediately oblige. Next, is the alphabet that you guys have been working on since the beginning of the year. Every little one sings it perfectly all the way through and you give them a round of applause and they each get a little punch in their reward cards.

The rest of the day goes by smoothly, with only one temper tantrum thrown and that was resolved quickly.

It's nearing the end of the school day and the kids are all playing during their free time. You're sitting with Ae-Cha, a small and fairly quiet girl, playing with colorful blocks; the both of you competing to see who can build the highest tower. You've learned that she responds well to playing games when there isn't too much talking involved.

You're constantly glancing around the room to make sure everyone is safe and playing nicely and you're always pleased. They've all improved so much since the beginning of school back in September. It's June now and they've all learned their alphabet and how to play nicely with their new friends, along with so many other things. They've really made you so proud this year. You can even hear them reciting the alphabet and nursery rhymes to each other as they play.

Your heart warms at the sound of tiny voices filling the room as they sing. Then you glance at the clock and realize the bell will be ringing in a few minutes. So, you declare Ae-Cha the winner with her foot-high tower of blocks and she beams proudly. Then, you get up and clap three times, "One, two, th-three! Eyes on me!" You singsong, then smile when the kids immediately respond by clapping twice and shouting "One, two! Eyes on you!"

"G-Great attention today, everyone! Alright, the bell will ring soon. Who can tell me w-what that means? What are we doing n-now?" A few little hands go up and you point to the little boy that raised his first, "Yes, Joon Woo?"

"We...Uhm...time to clean up toys...Uhm..." You smile to encourage him and he finishes cutely, "Time uh, to clean up our toys and pack bags."

"Yes! Thank you, Joon Woo. It is t-time for us to clean up and make sure our bags are packed up and ready for h-home!"

The kids start to pick up their toys as you put on the cleaning song that you play every day for them. You all sing along until the room is all tidied and their bags are packed with their homework papers.

You always give them little mazes to do for homework to get their little brains to learn to concentrate, along with instructions on what to draw to show the class the next day. Today, their homework is an extremely easy maze, a coloring page with the alphabet and instructions to draw themselves doing their favorite activity. The kids always love drawing pictures and sharing them with the class and it's a good ice breaker for the shy ones at the beginning of the day.

You always have less and easier homework for the kids on Mondays and Fridays, it just seems fair to you that way. You also feel like it's good for kids to express themselves and be able to share what they like and dislike. You've found drawing helps with communication and creativity for the kids in your class.

The sound of the bell ringing makes a few of you jump, then you hurry to the door. "Alright, ducklings! T-Time to line up!" A few of the kids make quacking sounds as they line up, giggling and talking to their friends.

You smile and open up the door, holding it as the kids walk out in a straight line, some of them still quacking like little ducks.

You lead the kids to the front of the school and make sure they get into the correct line for the bus if they take it. You wave goodbye to them as the kids that take the bus climb on and they run to a window to wave back to you.

The rest of the kids that are left are soon picked up by their parents or siblings. You wave to Ae-Cha, the last student to be picked up. She smiles shyly and waves back before hurrying after her big sister.

After that, you go back to your classroom and finish a few things before packing up to go home. As you're leaving your classroom, you run into one of the other teachers coming from his own room.

"Oh, h-hello Mr. B-Baek!" You bow, missing the ugly sneer on his face as you smile brightly at him. He pushes his glasses further up his nose as he scrutinizes you with his beady little eyes. "You don't belong here, Miss ___." He snaps.

You look at him in confusion, "I-I'm sorry, I don't understand."

"I've waited the entire school year to say this to you. But now that we are nearing the end, I think you should know that you have no business being a teacher at this school. You ought to make the right decision to discontinue your work here." Mr. Baek watches your face fall with a sick sense of satisfaction.

"B-But, why?" You ask, still not understanding.

"First of all, you're inexperienced. You just got out of college last year, am I right?"

You nod uncertainly.

"You're still a child. Why should a twenty-two-year-old girl come marching in here and take a spot that should have been given to someone with more experience? And especially someone like you." He glares at you before turning on his heel and walking away briskly.

Someone like me? What does he mean by that?

You watch after him, feeling a tiny pinch in your chest. You aren't sure what he means, but whatever he's talking about, it sounds like he believes you shouldn't have become a teacher at all. At this school or another. You'll have to ask Mina later because you really have no idea where his rant came from.

Is there something wrong with you becoming a teacher?

You shake your head and laugh it off, "He's probably just had a bad day." You tell yourself as you make your way out of the school.

As you walk home, you sing quietly along with the song in your headphones, a little skip to your step.

You never notice the dark figure across the street, his eyes trained on your every move.

One day earlier...

Jungkook groans as he tosses and turns in bed, searching for his phone to turn the alarm off. He finally finds it and hits dismiss, tossing the phone back down and rubbing his eyes with a tired yawn.

After another minute he sits up and looks out the window, frowning at the sun seeping in and pooling across his floor in a golden river. He stares at a small bird that lands on his windowsill until it flies away.

Jungkook yawns again and reaches up to rub his eyes for the second time. After a few minutes, he's finally able to drag himself out of bed and into the shower. He almost falls asleep again in there, but he manages to make it out after half an hour.

With a towel wrapped around his waist, he makes his way to the kitchen and grabs a bottle of soju that's sitting on his tiny dining table to take a small swig from, finishing off what he'd left last night after his third bottle right before he passed out in bed.

He sighs and grabs a bagel, searching for the cream cheese he swears he saw in his fridge last night. A small smile appears on his lips when he finds it. He snatches it and makes sloppy work of spreading it on his bagel before tossing the leftover trash onto his counter and plopping onto the couch, snarfing down the first half of his bagel in thirty seconds.

Jungkook sighs through his nose as he tiredly chews his breakfast, then he glances down and sees the file he'd left open on his coffee table last night. He swallows the bite he has in his mouth and leans forward to read over it.

Y/L/N Y/N...

Why is that name so familiar?

He shakes his head and flips the file closed, then he leans back on the couch, wanting to spend his Sunday relaxing before he has to get to work on this case. He isn't going to think about it again until tonight.

Jungkook settles down and lays his head on the back of the couch, closing his eyes and breathing deeply.

He won't think about it.

Jungkook lays there for a minute, then he opens his eyes and lifts his head, glaring at the closed file on the little table.

He grunts in annoyance and drops the other half of his bagel onto the table, grabbing the file angrily and sitting back again. He opens it and starts to reread everything he's read many times since Friday. There's just something that has felt off since he met with Mr. Ling, but he can't put his finger on what it is.

Jungkook squints at the name he's read a thousand times.

Y/L/N...Y/N...

"Ugh." He rolls his eyes, frustrated at not being able to remember where he's heard that name before. Then he looks at the occupation.

Teacher at Sunshine Kindergarten.

His brows furrow again, much like they have each time he's read this. He's never had a hit on a teacher before, let alone a Kindergarten teacher. That's such an odd target...

Most of his targets in the past have been sleazy business owners, rapists, leaders of gangs that have terrorized neighborhoods for years, even other hitmen. He's never had a problem with those jobs, but there's something about this one that's telling him to be careful.

Maybe it's because he knows nothing about his client, except for the large sum of money he must have due to the pay he's been promised. Other clients of his were more than happy to explain why they wanted him to do what he does. They never paid him until after the job was done, either.

That leads Jungkook to believe that this guy (or girl) is desperate for his services, convincing him to do it with payment before and after. Almost as if Jungkook would refuse after he found out who the target was...

Jungkook flips the page and scrutinizes the picture of the target.

She's very simple looking, Jungkook thinks. The girl in the picture is wearing a white flowy skirt with a blue blouse that covers her whole arms and white chunky tennis shoes. Her hair is in a low ponytail and it seems like she has headphones in as she walks down the street. There's a tiny smile on her face as if she's thinking about something that makes her happy.

Jungkook doesn't find her particularly beautiful, but she isn't ugly either. She's just very...

Simple...

Jungkook shakes his head, his eyes going over the photo and the girl's smile one more time. Maybe she's a double agent? Or a part of the mafia disguising herself as a school teacher?

He can't figure it out.

It doesn't matter much though, the job seems simple enough and the pay is more than he's ever gotten. After looking through everything once more, Jungkook closes the file and grabs his bagel, quickly eating it before getting up to get dressed for the day.

That night, Jungkook lays out his outfit for the next day.

It's all black, but not suspicious-looking. After all these years, he's been able to design the perfect outfits to avoid attention being drawn to him and simple enough so that no one would think much of him if he were to catch anyone's attention.

It might seem simple, but he prides himself on being able to get each part of his job perfectly designed for each case he gets.

Heaven knows it's taken him years to accomplish.

After he's gotten that all figured out, he walks over to his closet and pulls out a small safe. Setting it on the bed, he swiftly unlocks it and looks inside. He pulls out a few things, examining each of them before he sets them one by one onto his bed. Once he's got the items all laid out, he steps back to look it all over.

"I should wait to decide..." Jungkook mumbles to himself. After a minute of staring at everything, he nods and gathers it all up, carefully putting it back into the safe and locking it tightly. Then he brings it back to his closet and shoves it into the darkest corner where it lives.

That can wait.

He pulls his phone out and checks the time.

11:45

"Damn it," Jungkook mutters. He had wanted to get some sleep earlier tonight since he would have to be awake early tomorrow.

He changes into some shorts, then he yanks his shirt off and immediately climbs into bed, not even bothering to shower or brush his teeth. He really couldn't care less with how tired he is. And he hasn't even started yet.

His alarm blares at an ungodly hour as Jungkook groans loudly, resisting the temptation to chuck his phone across the room.

"I hate Mondays." He mutters angrily, setting his phone back on the nightstand far from gracefully.

He miserably drags himself out of bed and into the shower, going through his morning motions almost like a robot. His brain isn't fully awake and it's just on autopilot right now.

An hour later, he's just finishing his coffee, his eyes no longer squinting in exhaustion. Jungkook unceremoniously drops his coffee cup into the sink, promising himself he'll clean it up later, then he sighs as he grabs his black boots, walking to the couch to sit and pull them on. After he's done lacing them up, he grabs the file he's been avoiding like the plague since yesterday morning.

He mutters to himself, looking at the name on the page.

"I know that name."

Then he smacks his forehead to get himself to focus again. He stands up and folds the page with the girl's information and then her picture and tucks them into the inside pocket of his black jacket.

Time to get to work.

Jungkook spots the girl almost instantly, the second she steps out of a black car. He glances at the driver, but can only see a person with shoulder length black hair waving. The girl from the picture has a bunch of things in her arms as she blows a kiss to the short-haired driver.

Jungkook has been here since six-thirty in the morning and just as he was beginning to think she called in sick for work, he's finally gotten a chance to see this girl in person. She looks exactly as he remembers from her picture...plain.

She's even wearing the same white skirt and chunky tennis shoes, although this time she has a different top. Her hair is in a high ponytail this time.

"Well, ___. Nice to meet you." Jungkook mutters, watching closely.

After a moment, the black car drives away as the girl scurries into the school, tripping on the last step before straightening herself out again, then disappearing from his sight.

Huh.

Jungkook stares at the door for another minute, then he makes his way to the stores nearby, knowing he's gonna have to wait until the girl leaves. School for the young kids typically gets out at around three-thirty. So, he'll have to be back here around then.

He's definitely going to need to find something to do to kill time.

Jungkook heaves a sigh of relief when he hears the school bell finally ring.

He hurries from the clothes store he was browsing and down the street a block until he's almost across the street from the school. He finds a good spot where he can sift through some newspapers at a little stand and still have an eye on the school.

After a minute, he sees a long line of tiny children coming out from the school. The girl is with them and smiling brightly. Jungkook thinks he can hear some of the kids quacking like ducks. He tries not to look puzzled as he goes back to talking to the person working the paper stand. Jungkook makes small talk with the old man, still keeping an eye on the girl across the street as she waves to each child that leaves.

If she's some mafia boss disguised as a kindergarten teacher, she's one hell of a good actress.

"Do you have a girlfriend?" The old man inquires curiously.

Jungkook laughs softly and shakes his head, "No. I've been so busy with my work I never got the chance to date."

The man nods knowingly. They chat a bit more and Jungkook finds himself trying to balance talking to the man and watching the girl.

"Well, did you want to buy a paper for the day?"

Jungkook turns his gaze back to the old man and nods, "Yes. Two, please. My neighbor would probably enjoy one as well."

The old man laughs and nods, taking the money Jungkook hands him and giving him two papers, "What a kind young man you are. Someday you'll find a lovely young lady, don't you worry, son. You will realize that work is important, but love is even more so."

Jungkook just laughs and thanks the man, then he opens the paper as he slowly starts walking, pretending to read.

He stops at a bench and sits down to wait. The girl went back into the school a few minutes ago, hopefully, she won't be in there long.

Luck seems to be with him today, because, after only about five minutes, Jungkook sees a familiar white skirt flowing as she skips down the steps of the school.

He folds his paper carefully, tucking it into his back pocket. The girl puts little earbuds in and immediately starts to mouth the words of whatever song she's listening to. Jungkook tugs his black baseball cap down a little more as he follows on the other side of the street.

The girl has a bag decorated with cupcakes and cookies that bounces up and down as she dances a little.

What is she, twelve?

Jungkook watches in confusion as the girl stops to pet a dog, giggling when the puppy licks her hand. She straightens up, then after another minute, she seems to get distracted by something else.

Jungkook looks carefully and notices she's picked up a flower that was laying on the ground, seemingly trampled on. She gently holds it in her hands as she continues on her way. It goes on like this for the next fifteen minutes, the girl waving to people and smiling almost the whole way.

By the time she is walking up the steps to her apartment, Jungkook is dying to just get back home. That must have been the longest most annoying walk he's ever taken while tracking someone. The girl had stopped over twenty times, distracted by something else each time, he's sure of it.

Just to be sure, Jungkook lingers around the apartment building a little longer, but when it seems apparent that the girl is going to be staying there, he finally heads home.

Geez, Jungkook thinks in annoyance as he climbs the stairs that lead to his own apartment. His head is spinning with so many questions while he unlocks his door and yanks his boots off with a groan.

But when he plops down onto his bed in his tiny studio apartment, he just stares at the ceiling, his mind suddenly blank apart from one question.

Who in the hell would put a hit on this girl?

a/n: I hope you guys are liking the setup so far, thank you for all the positive reactions from the prologue!

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peakyblindersxx · 4 years ago

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whiskey business - john shelby x reader (part 8 of ?)

gif by @thesoldiersminute can i send you a cake or something cause fuCk!!!!!!!!!!! he's beautiful

a/n: to everyone still reading this fic, my sweet angels, ily!! this fic is so near and dear to my heart and @stxdyblr-2k has just done such an amazing job with it i can't even thank her enough. as per the last part, this one is also mostly her, just me editing but i hope you guys love it as much as i did!!! don't worry, there's gonna be a lot more :) and i apologize for being not as active, i'm gonna try to get a couple of requests up that i'm really excited about this week tysm for being patient with me <3

love, abi xxx

read part one two three four five six seven | my masterlist

prompt: ada has some talking to do, and you're not about to deny her.

warnings: fluff, semi-angst, tommy being the cocky mf he is (let's be real, it's only acceptable cause he's so damn fine), john being cute and in love and jesus i am head over heels

tagging: @datewithgianni, @mayaslifeinabox, @deepdonutkid, @springsoulofengland, @lilymurphy03, @operation-spot

You had planned to go to Ada's after work, but she obviously had other ideas. She didn't even bother walking in and asking to speak to you; instead, choosing to bang on the window closest to your desk and yelling at you to "fucking hurry up!" Your boss opened the door for you expectantly, not offering you any protection; he was firmly in the Shelby's ever growing pocket and as long as he could go home to his children, his sickly wife and their six bed in the country, with a full time nurse and nanny, he had no interest in crossing Thomas.

"Ada, I was coming to see you after work, I swear."

"I know. I was going to let you but..." She trailed off. "We need to talk. I don't know what the fuck is going on with you. John said he'd seen you last night and you asked after me."

John had indeed seen you last night. It was strange waking up with him, used to leaving almost immediately after he was finished with you. Your small bed could barely comfortably fit you both, having to intertwine your limbs with John's to not fall off the edge. You had awoken to John pressing a kiss to your forehead before lazily trailing his fingers between your legs, waiting for you to open your eyes before settling between your thighs, tongue swirling around your clit, making you cum before sunrise.

"Do we have to do this in the street?" You practically begged, the shouting having attracted onlookers.

"I wanted to talk to you before anyone else in the family gets to you because I need you to be honest."

"Ada-"

"No, I'm doing you a favour here, so you fucking listen. Right now, between you and I, no bullshit. No tactics. No white lies. You have to tell me exactly what we're dealing with." She looked frantic, scared for some reason.

You nodded, walking her down the side street, careful not to link arms with her. You knew she was doing you a favour; this wasn't about forgiveness or friendship, much more was at stake here.

"To what extent was Thomas involved?"

That took you off guard. Ada read the confusion on your face and sighed impatiently, her subtle plea for you to keep up.

Shit. You remembered your conversation with John, how she thought this was her brother's way of pushing her out of the company.

"Don't spare my feelings. What did my brother say to you?"

"He said it was in our mutual interest that you didn't find out. He didn't care who John slept with but cared who you trusted so I had to trust him. He said there was no point in upsetting you over one of John's conquests who he'd tire of in a month."

"That all?"

"Pretty much, I didn't know Arthur knew. He never talked to me about it, did laugh at Thomas' digs now that I think on it-"

"Did you know Isaiah and Michael knew?"

"I thought they were aware but no one ever talked to me about it."

"Of course they wouldn't." She hissed, frustration causing a nerve on her neck to jump.

Ada and you had spoken for years about the rampant misogyny of her brothers and any men you two came into contact with. Although you were both far more reserved than you used to be as rebellious and adventurous thirteen year olds, you'd both grew increasingly angry at how you were treated. She'd long written off her brothers as womanisers, who saw women as purely sexual and entertaining, objectifying them. You both long despised how they dehumanised women. She was amazed that Thomas had attempted to settle down and managed a somewhat loving marriage, but resented him for his carelessness and need for power which inevitably killed his wife.

"Ada, I just want to say..." You licked your lip nervously, unsure of how to continue.

"You need to talk, Y/N. No bollocks."

"Before last night, he'd never been to mine or called. I always went to him."

The muscle in her jaw tensed.

"You slept with him last night then?" You met her question with silence and she rolled her eyes. "The second he said he saw you I knew you had, he wanted to tell me that he was going to continue seeing you and that he hoped I'd be able to accept it one day."

"We never intended to hurt you. It was meant to be fun at first, but now..." You cut yourself off with a sigh, unable to admit you'd fallen for her brother.

"Isn't fun for me. It's fucking embarrassing." She paused, lighting a cigarette, nervous to offer you one, conflicted within herself. She raised her eyebrow, prompting you to continue, the mannerism so similar to her brother’s.

"It should never have happened. I am never going to be able to fix this, I'm so fucking ashamed for doing this to you, Ada."

She sulked, silently drinking in your words.

"Obviously it's not going to be the same, yeah? I'm really fucking upset. I'm so fucked off with you but Poll's really worried about a coup. She thinks you're being used as blackmail against John to keep him on side with Tommy while he expands."

"Makes sense."

"You're part of a much bigger game, you know?"

You nodded. "Yeah, and I knew I would lose from the start. Fucking tragic, Ada."

"My brothers keep pushing, keep growing the business. They keep chasing this prize but I don't think it even exists."

"If it does, it isn't worth it if this shit is the cost. I didn't mean to play into his hands."

"You couldn't have known." She said with a shrug, " 'Siah thinks John loves you."

"He told me last night." Several times, this morning also. You would never tire of hearing him moan those words into your neck or being yelled from your front door as he left for the office.

"You love him, don't you?" She said bluntly, a statement more than a question, your face suddenly hot with embarrassment.

Everything you'd suppressed for months, everything that you'd hidden, every time you lied smiling, every knowing glance from a stranger, every degrading comment from under Thomas' breath.

"I do, an awful lot."

She pauses, relighting her cigarette, "The worst thing about the entire situation is it could've been fine if someone told me. I wouldn't have loved it, obviously, but-" Ada sighed, rubbing her temple with her free fingers.

"I thought you'd hate me."

"How could I? I'd be more angry that you'd drop your standards for my brother. Seriously? Him? Mate…."

"Come off it, I've always thought he was charming. He's funny, smart-"

"Don't gush over my brother, it's grim. I'm just so fucked off you all lied to me." She peered at you through her cigarette smoke. "If you love him and he loves you..." she pressed her lips together as she tensed her jaw, "I could get over it. If it'd make you both happy. But that's going to take a long time. A long time."

"Ada-"

"Look I have meetings and shit to sort, I have to run." She interjected, checking her wristwatch, adjusting the cap which sat atop her trendy short haircut. You caught her arm before she could turn away.

"Thank you. For understanding."

She shrugged you off, "I don't get it, I'd never do that to you. But you also don't get to choose who you're attracted to. I'm really hurt, but I do love you and John a lot. He mentioned that after last night you helped him, got him cleaned up. I have to believe that you both do love each other. So I have to believe that this is a good idea for you both and not stand in your way."

"I love you, Ada. Can we hang out soon, just us two?"

She shook her head. "I need some time, I'll be in touch, yeah?"

You nod, stretching out your pinky finger. She sighed and linked it with hers, as you'd done since you were children, a silent signal to each other after a fight that you still had the other's back.

"Right, I've got to get back to this meeting, Tom is getting done by Polly for nearly getting John killed. I need to be there in case one of the lads needs patching up."

"Your aunt has a nasty left hook, I'll give her that."

"She'll be pleased you think so, she wanted Tommy to slice you to bits for crossing me."

"Fuck’s sake, thanks for the warning, I'll keep my head down. Good luck with the meeting."

Ada nodded and you watched her walk away, a Blinder suddenly appearing by her side seemingly from nowhere. This city was crawling with them. They clambered into Ada's car as you watched the car disappear into the distance before walking back to work. Thankfully, with your head still attached to your shoulders.

*******

Ada arrived at Thomas' estate, following the swell of shouting voices to his exquisite library. It was eye roll worthy and typical Tommy to choose the location of his post-fuckup debrief to be where he had the best view of the gardens, river and rolling hills. She could bet he'd sit in a corner and stare at the view, zoning out their aunt's lecture.

An armed blinder she vaguely recognised opened the door. Thomas was making a statement today with the armed guards, she noted. Her brothers really were fucked up. Arthur was an alcoholic killer who couldn't understand that Thomas would betray them all eventually, Finn was letting the tokyo and the razor chasers that circled him distract him from keeping the family together, John was apparently in love with her best friend, and finally, Thomas nearly got Arthur and John murdered last night with his foolishness. At this point only herself and Polly were holding everyone together, keeping everything silently moving along.

The door opened, and she was the last to arrive, Polly glaring as she murmured an apology, standing next to Finn. His eyes were bloodshot, grey-purple smudges under his eyes, he'd obviously had a heavy night. The last thing the poor lad needed was Polly's shrill yelling and the blinding sun streaming through the large immaculately crafted windows, which he'd tried to block with the brim of his cap. John caught her eye, acknowledging his sister with a nod, which she returned with a small tight smile.

Ada couldn't bear to think about the reasoning behind her brother's smug interjections in between Polly's rant to Thomas who was listening wordlessly, smoking.

Y/N and John? It didn't make sense. They had a similar sense of humour, sure, but she was far too intelligent for him. He also had a swarm of children, while Y/N preferred a wild night out only staggering home at daybreak.

It made far more sense for Y/N to end up with Michael, or if it had to be a brother, Finn. They were younger, so had less responsibilities and commitments so they could keep up with her. But John? Of course she knew he was believed to be the Casanova of her brothers, he was kind, he was an excellent father, yet he could never keep anyone around long, usually John was chasing someone new after a month or so. That's why the revelation that John had been involved with her best friend for almost half a year had taken her completely by surprise. Maybe that was why she was open to them being together. That had to be it. This relationship was completely out of character for John; she needed to believe that he was serious about his feelings towards Y/N and wasn't going to fuck her over. Because if he did, John would be a dead man.

"I don't know why you're all bleating at me. Yeah, I overlooked some details in the planning of last night's meeting-"

"Such as warning us that they were really fucked off because you'd helped bomb their warehouse." John pointed out.

"What do you want me to do? Apologise? Grow up, John." Tommy snapped back.

"They had loaded guns against their heads, they deserve an apology." Ada interjected, John giving her an appreciative flash of smile. She did love her big brother. Despite the fact that she'd pretty much only been yelling at him for the past month, John never dismissed her feelings and only apologised. It was confusing to admit to herself, but when Isaiah told her that he was confident John loved Y/N, she felt a wave of relief. At least he cared about her; it was the bare minimum but the Shelbys were notorious for not even meeting the bare minimum for acceptable social interactions.

"They didn't fuckin’ get shot." Thomas stated, his voice matter of fact and condescending.

"Do you ever hear yourself speak?" Polly spit back at him. "They didn't get shot this time. But it was too fucking close."

"It won't happen again, Polly." Tommy sighed. "What else can I say? Sorry lads, take the weekend off?"

"It's a good start." Arthur countered, "You're also paying for the extension on my house and my wedding."

"Fuck’s sake Arthur I was joking. But fine. Sure."

"You can't buy your family off." Polly scoffed at him.

"Think of it as compensation, a settlement." Thomas coolly corrected his aunt. "What do you want, John? A fucking farm?"

John hesitates while Finn whispered suggestions to him, Ada meeting his stare, John raising a brow to her in question. She sighed and nodded her approval.

"You can pay off my mortgage Tom, give me the kids' birthdays off-"

"So you'd never come into work then?" Finn cut in, Ada elbowing him in the ribs. She usually enjoyed Finn's remarks but she knew where John was heading; she could barely breathe.

"Tom, you're also to leave Y/N completely alone. If you have a problem with her, you come to me about it." He said firmly.

Arthur and Tommy traded knowing looks, obviously more aware of the ins and outs of his relationship than Ada was.

"Also if you're paying for Arthur's wedding I want the equivalent in cash." He adds.

Tommy shrugged. "Whatever. As long as we can move past last night and focus on today's order of business."

John nodded, satisfied. He knew Tom wouldn't care, but just saying out loud that he was involved with Y/N and having his family aware was a relief. He hadn't realised until he finally admitted how stressful keeping his relationship a secret was. Now, he could stop worrying about Tommy interfering.

Polly rolled her eyes, lecturing the brothers on their lack of moral backbone to allow themselves to be bought off, but dismissed them. She caught Ada's arm in hers on their way out, pulling her far from earshot.

"So Y/N and John are together now?" She asked, her face firm and scowling.

"Polls, I talked with her, she's aware of what she's done. She apologised and meant it. What more can I ask for?"

"Her not to have fucked him in the first place."

"She said that. Look, Polls, they're happy right? John seems happy-"

"He always is when he gets a leg over."

"You know she looked after him last night? Fixed him up after the meeting."

"Meeting? It was a fucking set up." Polly hissed but her face had softened. "She cleaned him up?"

"Antiseptic, bandages and all."

Polly looked subtly impressed, although she'd never admit it. "He went to hers? Not yours?"

"He wanted to talk to her." Ada shrugs, "I saw her this morning and-"

"What do you mean? You bumped into her?"

"I went to her work." Ada admitted, her aunt shooting her an exasperated glare.

"Why do I bother? Nobody listens to me."

"I had to talk to her, I'm glad I did. She reckons she loves him, he told her last night that he loves her, so..."

"We are talking about John? Our John?"

"I know Polls, I'm as amazed as you."

Her aunt huffed, unimpressed. "Are you okay with it though?"

"I guess, I just want them to be happy. I've told them to give me time with it."

"She was a good friend growing up, but people change, sometimes for the better, often for the worse."

"Poll, it's Y/N; she's my best friend. At the end of the day, we'd do anything for each other."

"Sweet Ada, you're going to be so miserable if you keep letting people walk all over you." Polly said wisely, kissing her goodbye affectionately. "I hope you're right. If she makes you cry again I'll kill her myself."

"Thanks, Polls."

She knew her aunt wasn't joking.

#john shelby imagine #john shelby x reader #john shelby fluff #john shelby series #john shelby fanfic #peaky blinders fluff #john shelby #john shelby x you #peaky blinders imagine

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strangerivy · 4 years ago

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Say Your Mine

Summary: Levi and you head out with a small group of Scouts out of the walls to clear out some titans and your taught a small lesson on why your hair should not be long and in the fear pint up emotions are brought out into the open. Warnings: Swearing | Some Violence | Spoilers for No Regrets OVA Pairings: Levi Ackerman x Reader (y/n) Genre: 18+ | Fluff Word Count: 2.8k Author’s Note: So my dumb butt forgot Flagon is dead... so I fixed Confessions in the Snow switching it to Mike, nothing changed though. Anyway, let me know what you guys think! and if anyone wants to be tagged in future Levi fic’s just let me know and I’ll start a taglist 😊 💜

|| Masterlist | AOT Masterlist ||

Year 845 - Spring

You sat on your horse next to Levi, running your fingers through your horse’s mane with a soft smile, soaking up the little amount of peace you would have for the majority of the day. The morning sun just barely breaking over the top of the wall as you waited for the gates to open. A soft spring breeze blowing through you, sending a chill up your spine. The frost on the almost bloomed flowers that lined the streets and in window garden beds of the homes around you was a symbol of the cold night air still lingering around.

Your hair blew wildly around you and you quickly swiped it away from your face with a huff as you continued running your fingers through the mane, your horse letting out a snort in appreciation lifting its head for you to pet it more causing you to let out a small giggle scratching the underside of its chin. You heard Levi click his tongue and you looked over at him with a tilt of your head.

“What?” You asked not sure what could have pissed him off so early but then as you thought about it, there were a number of things that could have. For instance, you may have given him your cup of tea rather than his. But he would have said something you thought, your morning tea always having sugar added to it, which is something he hated, always commenting on how it ruined the taste of the tea.

“Didn’t you have time to do anything with your hair?” He questioned looking over at you with narrow eyes, another gust of wind sending your hair into a wild dance again. When the wind died down once again you quickly gathered it up and pulled it behind you taking the hair tie you did have, tying it sloppily back to appease the grumpy man beside you.

“Better?” You pointed at the messy bun with a cheeky grin unphased by his cold attitude and he scoffed once again with a roll of his eyes.

“It’ll do,” He sighed knowing he wouldn’t get a better result now as you were about to leave. Of all the days you could have overslept, it had to be the day you go out beyond the walls. Erwin, who was leading this mission, yelled out that the gates would be opening shortly. You felt your heart began to beat faster as the minutes tick.

There was always a sense of excitement and nerves each time you went outside the walls. Excitement to see the outside world once again, beyond the walls. Nerves because you could never predict what was going to happen, how many people would be lost this time? If you would be one of those, you glance at Levi from the corner of your eye, or if he would be among the dead. You let out a heavy sigh from your own thoughts and Levi eyed you curiously but still looking stoic as ever, the fear of what lay beyond the walls never seeming to faze him. You waved his unasked question off as the formation began to move forward, the sound of chains rattling signaling the gate was raising.

“Nothing,” you sighed heavily “Just lost in my own head,”

“Aren’t you always lost in your head,” Levi deadpanned your mouth dropped at his comment feeling your annoyance rise, the dark thoughts forgotten in an instant.

“Rude!” You shouted in offense shooting daggers at him with your glare, he smirked before you started to speed up making it outside of the walls into the open world beyond the walls. You closed your eyes for a moment letting yourself feel the sense of freedom beyond the wall provided before regaining your composure and becoming the skilled soldier you had become over the last few months.

The signal came to break off into your smaller parties, the mission was small so there weren’t many of you out in the field today. Reports of a few titans having been spotted too close for comfort, easy in and out misson.

You and Levi sped up veering off to the left of the formation following right behind Erwin and Mike, you would be closest to the trees that you would be looking for the Titans this time around. You kept your eyes open waiting to catch any movement.

You were quick to spot the 10-meter titan running at you, quickly shooting a red smoked signal flare into the air to signal the other parties. As soon as the Titan was close enough, Levi used the trees on the edge of the forest to take it out. You grabbed onto his horse so that he would be able to easily get back on and continue with the mission.

Levi got back onto his horse with ease giving you a nod grabbing ahold of its reins. Another 10-meter appeared that Mike was able to take out as you continued along the edge of the trees. That was the nice thing about your team now, you didn’t really need to speak to know what to do.

The mission was going smoothly for you each having killed a Titan. Erwin gave the order to retreat as it seemed you had got all the suspecting Titans. You were heading back to the gate with a small smile as it seemed for once, no one died. This seemed to be the case each time you went out with Erwin, he was growing quite a reputation of not losing people in his squad.

You turned to talk to Levi when a large leg of a 15-meter Titan shot out of the trees causing you to quickly turn your horse almost losing balance and falling off but you were able to quickly recover still moving as the Titan tried to swipe at you just barely missing as you swerved. You cursed yourself, getting into a stance on the back of your horse to use your gear.

You hooked your grappling hooks onto a tree just behind the titan using it to gain momentum with your gas to get high enough into the air to grapple onto the nap but just as you were about to do that, you felt your hair become loose flying wildly behind you. You made eye contact with the mindless creature, the world suddenly moving in slow motion as you watched its hand reach out grabbing onto your hair with a tight grip.

You let out a painful scream as you were yanked by the titan feeling the whiplash in your neck and then pain on your scalp from being held by your hair. You reached up dropping your blades, holding onto the base of your hair that you could grab to help relieve some of the pressure, trying to yank your hair out of its grip, legs swing wildly in the air. You felt the air leave your lungs as it brought you closer to its mouth your actions becoming more desperate, your eyes beginning to tear up as you thought your fate was now sealed. You tried to reach your dangling swords while still pulling on your hair another string of curses leaving your lips.

Just as the Titan was about to lower you to its mouth you heard the hiss of ODM gear and a scream of an angered soldier but not just any, Levi.

“Get your filthy hands off her!” He spat as he sliced at the neck, a more than large enough piece being cut from the nape nearly beheading the thing. The titan began to fall forward with you still in its grasp, but it was now loosening enough for the strands to slip through. Its body already beginning to disintegrate. Levi quickly grabbed hold of you in midair before landing on the ground whistling for your horses to come back before another titan can make a surprise appearance.

You collapsed to the ground once your feet hit the earth breathing heavily as you tried to calm your racing heart down, adrenaline still rushing through you your hands shaking as you collected your blades sheathing them. Your horse appeared next to you and you began to stand up using Levi’s arm to help pull you up.

“T-thank y-” You were cut off as Levi slammed his lips onto yours once you were fully standing, his hands on either side of your face pulling you closer to him. You stared at him in shock at his actions feeling his lips move against your still ones as your brain tried to process that this was real.

You felt his tongue brush against your bottom lip asking for entrance and you relaxed into his grip closing your eyes and kissing him back just as passionately gripping onto his jacket. You parted your lips with a soft sigh letting him in your tongues battling for dominance after years of pint up romantic tension was finally let go, poured all into this one kiss.

He broke the kiss resting his forehead on yours both of you taking deep breaths to catch your breath. You relaxed your grip on his jacket as rubbed your cheeks with his thumbs. He let out a sigh before helping you back onto your horse, you weren’t able to take your eyes off of him as he did, confusion filling your mind. Once he was sitting back on his horse you went to speak.

“Le-”

“We are cutting your hair the second we get back to HQ,” He interrupted before taking off towards the others. You blinked a few times as you stared at him riding away knowing that once you were back things would need to be discussed, you could no longer play this game and you weren’t sure he wanted to either. One of you needed to make the first move, looks like it needed to be you.

You were laying on Levi’s bed, legs dangling over the edge gently swing them as you were waiting for him to gather the things he needed for your inevitable haircut. You traced the groves of the bottom of the top bunk with the tip of your figure as you heard him walkabout, you replayed the conversation you had with Hange earlier while Levi was conversing with Erwin about the mission.

“So, he just kissed you, in front of everyone, and then rode off?” She questioned as she was taking notes from her most recent experiment, she looked up at you threw her glasses, “What are you going to do?”

You let out a frustrated sigh falling back into one of her chairs running a hand through your hair working out the knots as your fingers reached the ends. “I don’t know,” You whispered staring up at the ceiling and Hange let out an equally frustrated sigh making you look up at her.

“You two are so much alike it’s no wonder neither of you have admitted your feelings to the other,” She states almost as if you weren’t in the room and she was speaking to herself. “Are you happy? Are you happy with how things are between the two of you? Can you keep going like this y/n?”

Hange’s words echoed through your mind making your frown. Your mind wandered to the kiss once again your heart starting to race at just the memory of it. You thought about what it could mean, but you knew in the back of your mind exactly what it meant but your fear of assuming the wrong thing had you pushing that thought as far back as it could go.

You lifted your head to see he was getting the chair set up, you let out a frustrated sigh letting your head fall back onto the mattress. You felt a gentle kick on your boot making you lift your head again.

“Come on,” Levi motioned to the chair and you lifted yourself off the bed taking a seat. He had grabbed your brush from your room brushing the knots out of your hair. This was your favorite part of the whole process. Levi always took his time whenever he brushed your hair, it was calming especially on nights you couldn’t sleep and you two would just sit there talking and he would mindlessly brush your hair with his fingers.

After Levi is satisfied with your hair being knot-free, he begins working on cutting your hair to a more manageable length.

“Honestly, how did you not notice this mop?” He questions a hint of annoyance in his tone

“It’s not a mop!” You let out a small huff, “And besides I’m not the only one who seems to have forgotten about their hair, yours is a bit longer than usual as well,” You defended, you heard Levi let out a small snort and you went to turn your head to look at him with a smirk, but he gripped your head-turning it back forward.

“Hold still,” He instructed, you both fell into a comfortable silence the only sound in the room being that of the scissors. Your mind once again allowed to wander to things you didn’t want to think about especially in the presence of the man those thoughts were about.

“Levi?” You asked, he let out a hum telling you that he was listening. You kept your gaze at the ground as you tried to find the right words. You must have taken too long because the room became quiet.

“What is it?” Levi asks curiously wondering what had you so on edge. You debated making something up to avoid the conversation once again, but you knew it would only make the situation worse if it wasn’t addressed now. If the kiss wasn’t addressed. You took a breath to calm your nerves.

“You kissed me,” Your voice was soft when you finally spoke the air in the room changing, thickening as the veil you and Levi danced around shattered, “Y-you kissed me and- and I don’t know what it means,” Your voice was barely above a whisper but sounded so loud with each word, your heart feeling like it was going to beat right out of your chest.

The room remained quiet, the only thing giving away that he was still standing behind you was his breath. You began to heat up from nerves worried that this was a mistake, thoughts beginning to flood your mind of how you should have just kept your mouth shut and continued playing the game. You went to turn around in your seat to look at him, but he grabbed ahold of your shoulders pulling you tight to the back of the chair, holding you in place. You tensed at the sudden contact keeping your gaze on the ground, his fingers were trembling slightly giving away just how nervous he was.

“I’m sorry,” You panicked going to stand up and walk out “I s-s-shouldn’t have said anything” You rambled but before you could leave Levi grabbed a hold of your wrist.

“Will you just give me a second, dammit” His voice was quiet but still held a sternness to it that kept you from running out the door. His grip loosened slowly until his hand finally let go dropping to his side. You pulled your hand to your chest rubbing your wrist with your other hand as you cautiously turned to face him.

He was staring down at the ground his hair covering his face, hands dangling at his side. You took a step cautious step closer and then another until you were standing right in front of him. He slowly lifted his head so that he was looking at you and that’s when you could see the deep blush on his cheeks. Seeing him blush caused your cheeks to start heating up and you turned your head in embarrassment, but he gently gripped your chin turning it back to face him.

“It means that I love you, alright?” His voice gained more confidence as he went on, “It means that I’m yours and I would like- I would like i-if you would be mine,” He scratched the back of his head from the nerves and you stared at him in a bit of shock your mouth slightly opened as your processed his words a smile slowly spreading across your lips as it sunk in.

You threw your arms around his neck pulling him into you in a tight embrace as you snuggled into the side of his neck taking in his scent that always brought a sense of peace to you. He slowly relaxed, his shoulders dropping and his arms slowly wrapping around your waist holding you equally as tight to him.

“Of course I will,” You answered with a smile pulling back enough to look at him “Always have been,” He pulled you into a kiss just like before. He cupped your face rubbing soft circles into your cheeks. When you parted he pushed a few stray hairs out of your face.

"Now let's fix your mop,"

"It's not a damn mop!"

#levi ackerman x reader #levi x reader #levi x y/n #levi ackerman x you #levi ackerman #levi ackerman fanfiction #levi ackerman fic #levi ackerman fluff #attack on titan #attack on titan fanfiction #levi ackerman attack on titan #levi attack on titan #erwin smith #hange zoe #levi aot

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amanda-glassen · 4 years ago

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The Wonder Years: Part 4

While getting ready for her first school dance, twelve-year-old Olivia starts a path toward discovering who she is truly meant to be. Parts 1-3 can be found under the the tag #alex and liv: the wonder years

Thank you to everyone who reblogged the last chapter and an extra special thank you to @storiesofsvu @ghostwritingcabenson @oliviaswifey @denpine @cabensons and my two anons for your kind words and encouragement to keep going with this.

Approaching the entryway to her middle school in the morning was always a scary thought for Olivia, but at 6 o’clock on the night of her first school dance, the entryway seemed downright menacing. Other students were excitedly approaching the entryway－some with groups of friends, others with dates－but none seemed to be as nervous as Olivia.

“Ms. Benson, can you take a picture of Olivia and me together?” Alex asked. She handed her phone over to Serena and yet another wave of nervousness hit Olivia. She’s going to hug me or something and my mom is going to freak out again.

The two of them posed near the colorful Spring Fling banner with Olivia afraid to even wrap her arm around Alex. She had wanted to get the pictures over with until she saw how disappointed Alex looked.

“Loosen up, kid,” Jamie teased her. “It’s your first dance, not your first day of school. Why don’t you twirl her?”

Olivia gave her a confused look. “Twirl her? How?”

“Like this,” Jamie held out her hand for her girlfriend. “Serena.”

Alex and Olivia watched as Jamie did a twirling pose with Serena. When she decided to actually twirl her, Serena let out a squeal that made Alex giggle.

She grabbed Olivia’s hand and tried to get Olivia to go along with it. “Olivia! Twirl me, please! That looks so cute!”

With an encouraging look from Jamie, Olivia held Alex’s hand and raised her arm up to twirl her. Alex smiled and giggled and Olivia considered that giggle to be her new favorite sound and she was now willing to do just about anything to hear it again.

Alex looked so beautiful and so happy in the pictures and, although she wasn’t too big on social media, Olivia couldn’t wait to post them and brag to everyone about her girlfriend.

“I’ll send you the pictures, Ms. Benson,” Alex said while scrolling through her phone. “You too, Olivia. I’m going to post these and show everyone how cute and dapper my girlfriend is.”

“Alex! Alex!” They heard a girl shout. Olivia looked ahead and saw Serena Southerlyn, Alex’s best friend, walking toward them.

“Hi, Serena!” Alex responded.

Olivia watched as the two of them hugged and complimented each other’s dresses and hair. She liked seeing Alex with her friends because it made her feel like she was in some sort of alternate universe. Olivia’s friends were mostly boys and they wouldn’t be caught dead complimenting each other’s appearance. Instead, there were high-fives when they greeted each other and the occasional teasing that was all in fun.

“We should go in now,” Alex said to Jamie and Serena. “Thank you Ms. Castillo and Ms. Benson. I appreciate you both bringing us.”

"What's the rush?" Alex's best friend asked Alex and Olivia. Olivia noticed her girlfriend roll her eyes when Serena approached Jamie. "I don't believe we've been properly introduced. My name is Serena Southerlyn. I'm a friend of Alex's and an acquaintance of Olivia's. You are the most dashing woman I have ever seen. Would you escort me to the dance?"

Alex covered her face with her hands. "Serena! You have a girlfriend."

Olivia looked at her mom who had started scrolling through her phone to prevent herself from laughing, but her movement got the attention of the younger Serena. "Who is she?" the twelve-year-old Serena asked Jamie with a disgusted look on her face.

Jamie reached for her girlfriend’s hand. "She's my girlfriend who is also named Serena."

"And she's my mommy," Olivia said defensively. Once the word 'mommy' came out of her mouth, she was grateful the guys weren't around. Instead it was just Alex who looked at her adoringly.

"You are a very beautiful girl," Jamie began. "And I'm sure you're aware that girls named Serena are always the prettiest and always the most special, which is why there's only room for one Serena in my heart, but I know for a fact it won't be long before some girl sweeps you off your feet."

Alex tugged at Serena’s arm to get her to leave with them. "Some girl already has. She has a girlfriend, one whose parents will be dropping her off at the designated drop off area any time now."

"Fine," twelve-year-old Serena yanked her arm from Alex's grip before gesturing to the older Serena. "If this doesn't work out, Jamie, you know where to find me.”

Mrs. Carmichael’s SUV pulled into the drop off area and when Abbie stepped out of the vehicle in the same navy blue and floral criss cross fit and flare dress as Serena, Serena ran over to her without saying another word.

It had taken every ounce of willpower she had, but Serena Benson had managed to hold in her laughter until the twelve-year-old Serena was out of earshot. “If she’s like that at twelve, what is she going to be like at seventeen?” She playfully smacked Jamie’s arm. “I guess I just have five years left with you.”

“Forgive her,” Alex smiled nervously. “Ever since she turned twelve, all she can think about is women. And please don’t judge me based on my best friend. I promise my heart belongs only to Olivia.”

Once she heard that, Olivia couldn’t decide if she wanted to beam with pride because of how Alex felt or cease to exist because of how her mom would react. With no idea what to do with herself, she stood there with her eyes wide.

“I’m sure you’re the perfect girlfriend for Olivia,” Serena said as she pulled Olivia in and gave her a tight embrace. Olivia felt like her circulation was being cut off, but what made matters worse is when her mom planted a kiss on her cheek. “My little Ollie. I love you so much.”

Olivia finally managed to move just enough to give Jamie a look that she hoped she would see as a cry for help. “Come on, babe, be cool.” Jamie snickered. “She’s in middle school now. She’s got a reputation to protect.”

Olivia’s reputation consisted of when she ran away the first time Alex flirted with her and the time she narrowly avoided walking into a pole and instead fell down on the cement and scraped her knee as a result of watching Alex apply lip gloss. Now that she thought about it, she no longer had a reputation to protect, but she was grateful for Jamie’s statement nonetheless.

“I’ll let you go,” Serena told her, just slightly lessening the tightness of her embrace. “I want you girls out here at nine o’clock. If not, I’m going in there and I will make an announcement that I’m looking for Olivia Margaret Benson in 6th grade, core 1, Mrs. Peterson’s homeroom.”

“Oh, god,” Olivia groaned, a look of absolute terror on her face.

“She’s kidding, Olivia,” Alex giggled.

“She’s not,” Olivia worriedly responded.

As soon as they entered the auditorium, Olivia realized, aside from the colorful streamers and punch, the dance was nothing like she expected. The seventh and eighth graders were all on the dance floor, but the sixth graders were separated along gender lines with the boys on one wall of the auditorium and girls on another. Her friends who had all talked big just one day prior were now even too afraid to stand near their dates. The only sixth graders who seemed to be enjoying themselves were Abbie and Serena who were on the dancefloor along with the older kids.

“Do you wanna dance?” Olivia asked Alex while she scanned the room.

“I don’t know,” Alex responded nervously. “I mean, maybe later. This isn’t my song.”

“Yeah, good idea,” Olivia nodded, feeling completely relieved. “This isn’t my song either.”

Their friends may have been on opposite sides of the auditorium, but what soon brought them together was Olivia’s new haircut, which much to her chagrin, became the topic of conversation among their respective groups. The girls showered her with compliments, some of which made Alex start to feel jealous until Olivia squeezed her hand to reassure her that she was the only girl for her.

A slow song began to play and, although Olivia hadn’t magically learned how to slow dance over the last few minutes, she knew another romantic gesture might be required to make Alex feel better. Even if I make a complete fool of myself, she’s worth it.

“May I have this?” Olivia blurted out.

Alex narrowed her eyes. “Have what?” she asked before Olivia realized she hadn’t finished the rest of her question about asking her to dance.

Her girlfriend may not have been the most popular girl in sixth grade, but Alex and her friends held enough rank in the sixth grade social scene for that moment to be sufficiently awkward for Olivia with all of them exchanging glances and wondering what Olivia was trying to ask.

“Dance with me?” Olivia’s voice squeaked for a third time that night.

Her question was followed by a chorus of ‘aww’ and ‘how cute’ from Alex’s friends, but most importantly, it was followed by a kiss on the cheek from Alex. “I’d love to dance with you, Olivia.”

Olivia tried to remember every prom scene from teen movies she had watched with her mom on Netflix so she could know where to place her hands during slow dancing until she realized she usually got bored of those movies and the two of them would watch some cheesy horror movie from when her mom was a teenager because Olivia considered those way more fun, especially when they’d turn the lights off in their apartment and eat junk food on the couch while they watched. I guess the Blair Witch Project can’t save me now. Panic set in once again until she saw how beautiful Alex looked standing in front of her. Her girlfriend’s glittery lips and braces-filled smile put Olivia at ease and, once she focused on her instead of the logistics of slow dancing, Olivia finally started to enjoy herself.

She didn’t know if she had rhythm and she didn’t care because what mattered most to her was holding Alex close while some song about eternal love or maybe heartbreak－Olivia didn’t actually care－played in the background.

Alex’s coconut body spray reminded her of every good summer memory she ever had and all of the new memories she wanted to make with her that summer. It was the first time she had held Alex that close and for that long and, as much as she enjoyed the time she pigged out on nachos and caught a foul ball at a Mets game with her uncle, she now had a new contender for the best moment of her life, but when Alex whispered in her ear ‘You’re the best girlfriend in the world,’ she knew nothing could ever compare to her first slow dance with the very first girl she would give her heart to.

#cabenson #alex and liv: the wonder years #alex cabot #olivia benson #law and order svu

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keanureevesisbae · 4 years ago

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“Never out of practice” - Epilogue

Summary: When Darcie’s father loses an important case, a killer seeks revenge, by kidnapping the entire Angel family. Though John thought that he was officially retired, he has to save his Darcie and her family, because he can’t lose her.

John Wick x OFC Darcie

Word count: 1.6k

Warnings: None

A/N: Sadly this is the last chapter of Never out of practice, but I highly doubt this’ll come as a surprise: I’m writing something else for them, because these two are the cutest ever.

Also, I hope the people who are on my taglist are now tagged correctly - turns out something went wrong. I’m sorry xx

Masterlist // Previous chapter

Christmas has always been one of my favorite holidays, but this year it’s extra special. Last year it was just John, Tiki and me, since there was a huge blizzard and couldn’t get out. Now I’m here with the most important people of my life: my mom, dad, Jennie and Raye. Oreo and Tiki are asleep literally underneath the decorated tree.

I place my head against John’s shoulder as we watch Raye unpack her final gift. ‘No way, you guys,’ she says, as she unpacks the Prada shoes she has been eyeing for so long now. Every time we walked passed the store and she saw them, she’d tell us how much she loved those shoes. ‘I can’t believe you bought those for me.’

‘Well, if I had to hear one more time that you wanted them, but couldn’t afford them, I had to hit you, so yeah,’ I say, ‘it’s for my own sanity really.’

Raye sticks out her tongue. ‘You guys are the best. Thank you so much. I think I might wear those to my next date.’

‘And if you get dumped, at least you’re wearing cute shoes,’ Jennie says, something that earns her a painful pinch in her arm.

Since Jennie lost her parents not too long ago, she has been depending on mine for certain things and spending Christmas with my parents is one of those things. Sometimes she calls my mom, when she needs some female advice. It has become such a new normal in our life. She can’t really count on Raye’s parents, since Raye can’t even count on them.

Apparently, her brothers fiancé turned out to be a bitch and the wedding is off. Raye was kind of delighted, to see Alex so heartbroken and to be fair, I hated the fact that I couldn’t be there to witness it myself.

‘It’s such a shame that there are no more gifts left,’ Raye mentions.

‘You just got Prada shoes,’ Jennie says. ‘How ungrateful are you?’

‘Well,’ John says, before they can start to have a discussion, ‘there is one more gift left.’

‘Really?’ my mom asks. ‘It’s for me, isn’t it? Since I’m the best mother in law a guy could possibly ask for.’

He snorts. ‘No, I’m sorry, Somi. This gift is for my lovely Darcie,’ John says, looking over to me with a smile on his face. He is long overdue for a haircut, but now that his hair is basically shoulder length… God, I’ve been having certain dreams about it. Things that I shouldn’t be thinking about when there are other people around.

‘Oh, what did you get me?’ I ask him, turning a bit to the side, so I can have a better look at him.

‘Well,’—he clears his throat and holds onto my hand—‘Darcie, I can’t believe that we’ve been together for almost a year and a half. It seems longer and not in a time never passes with you, because you are so boring-way, but more in a I feel like I’ve known you forever-way.’

I chuckle, squeezing his hand, when I see that he needs a little bit more encouragement to continue.

‘Every day when I wake up, I prize myself so insanely lucky that you are my girlfriend. The way you run your cafe with so much passion and how you make your cafe a safe haven. The way I somehow persuade you to love me and get another dog. The way we are slowly talking more about our future, without freaking out. How you took care of me when I had injured my leg. Everything you do and say, makes me love you even more.’ He brings my hand to his lips, to press a soft and tender kiss on my knuckles. ‘When that idiot took you, I thought that was it. I thought that I had lost you, like I lost everything before. We were supposed to have a future together and thinking about how that might be taken away from me…’ John sighs.

It surprises me that he is so open, especially with everyone around us. I feel the tears burning in my eyes and I clear my throat to prevent myself from crying. My fingers run through his raven locks.

‘Darcie,’ he continues, ‘I really love you so insanely much and I can’t think of anyone I’d rather spend my life with than you. I love having you as my girlfriend, but I think it needs an upgrade.’

For some reason Raye squeals and I glance at her, unsure of what is happening. When I look back at John, I see he has a red velvety looking box in his hand and he is sitting down on one knee. My eyes widen, while I bring my hands to my mouth. ‘What are you doing?’ I ask him.

‘My sweet Darcie, will you marry me?’ He opens up the the velvet box, only to reveal such a beautiful ring.

Tears drip down my cheeks, as a sob leaves my lips. He is genuinely proposing to me? ‘Why do you want to marry me?’ I ask in disbelieve.

John frowns, before he lets out a nervous laugh. ‘Didn’t you hear my speech, baby?’

‘I did, but… But what if I suck at being a fiancée or a wife? I thought I was getting the girlfriend part finally under control. John, you are such an amazing man and I… I feel like I—’

‘No, baby,’ he interrupts me, placing a hand on my cheek, ‘you’ll do just fine. I promise.’

‘Oh my God, Darcie, don’t leave the man hanging,’ Raye intervenes and I wonder how long she’s been holding in her excitement.

I look over to John and smile. ‘Yes, John, I want to marry you.’

He lets out a sigh of relief, like he wasn’t expecting me to say yes. He takes out the ring and holds out his hand. I place mine in his and he slides on the ring on my finger.

I stare down at the diamond and a nervous laugh leaves my lips. ‘I’m engaged,’ I whisper.

‘Yes, you are.’ John sits on the floor and pulls me in his arms. His warm lips against mine. I place my hands on the sides of his face, never wanting to let go. I’m going to marry this man. I’m going to be—

‘Holy shit,’ I say, pulling back. ‘I’m going to be Mrs. Wick.’

‘I know!’ Raye shouts, jumping up to launch herself in my arms. I tumble over, starting to laugh as she says: ‘You’re engaged!’

‘I know, isn’t this crazy?’

Jennie pushes Raye off of me, to give me a long hug. ‘I’m so happy for you, Darcie. You deserve this so much.’ She takes a good look at the ring and says: ‘He has taste.’

‘He sure does.’

‘Mister Mustang, you are an engaged man,’ Raye yells, jumping in John’s arms. He chuckles, patting her back as she hangs around him like a koala.

My father is genuinely crying. ‘My munchkin is engaged to such a great man. She is truly growing up.’

‘Dad,’ I laugh, wiping his tears away, but I’m tearing up as well.

After everything that happened, it took him a while, before my father could really look at John the way he did before, but now they’re the best of friends again.

My mom wraps her arms around the both of us. ‘Chris, don’t you agree? Aren’t they your favorite,’—oh dear God, she’s gonna say sail again—‘ship?’

‘Did you just get that right?’ I smile and pull my mom into a hug.

‘Now I finally have the son I always wanted,’ mom jokes, earning her a painful squeeze from me. She pats my hand away, before giving John a hug.

My dad looks at John and say: ‘I wanted to tell you that you should take good care of her, but I know for a fact that you will. You have done so much for her and us already.’ He pulls my boyfr— fiancé in a hug and I smile watching them.

John holds out his hand and when I hold it tightly, he gives me a long kiss on my lips. ‘I have to get used to introducing you as my fiancée,’ John says.

‘Well, I like the upgrade.’

‘Darcie,’ Raye says, holding Tiki in her arms, while scratching Oreo behind his ears. ‘Ask John about how much the ring was.’

‘Don’t,’ John says, glaring dangerously at my friend.

‘I’d rather not know,’ I say in all honesty. ‘I bet it was way too expensive. Something around two thousand dollars.’

Raye barks out a laugh. ‘Oh honey.’

‘Raye, really, don’t say it,’ John says.

‘How do you know the prize?’ I ask here. ‘Were you all in on this?’

‘I helped him pick out the ring, Jennie helped him think about how he should propose and your dad gave John his blessing two months ago and since your dad can’t keep a secret from your mom, he probably told her.’

‘Oh my God,’ I laugh. ‘The fact that the three of you,’—I point to Jennie, mom and dad—‘kept it a secret doesn’t surprise me, but you, Raye… I’m impressed.’

She nods. ‘Oh Darcie, I’m growing.’ She sighs deeply and smiles at us. ‘The ring was a little over ten thousand dollars,’ she blurts out.

‘Raye, I swear—’ John brings his fist to his mouth.

‘Ten thousand fucking dollars?’ I yell, staring at this ring. ‘I have ten grand on my left hand? John, are you insane?’

Taglist: @toomanystoriessolittletime @flhorah @allie1804-fan @cynic-spirit @raven-black102

#keanu reeves x oc #keanu reeves fanfic #keanu reeves #keanu reeves x original character #keanu reeves x ofc #john wick x oc #john wick fanfic #john wick #john wick x original character #john wick x ofc #never out of practice

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quinnallerton · 4 years ago

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ULTIMATE Beatlemaniac Tag!

I was tagged by @femininehygieneproducts and I LOVE this idea! Thank you for asking these very important questions:

How long have you been a fan?: Started in 1996 after the Anthology, but before I listened because my dad was a huge fan.

Favorite Beatle: John, used to be George....

Favorite era for music:1964-1966

Favorite era for lewks: Teddy Boys/ Hamburg. Dirty, greasy boys are my jam!

Favorite song: Um, shit. Only one? ‘Happiness Is A Warm Gun’ I always come back to. No, ‘Spoil the Party’. No wait, ‘In My Life’ damn.

Favorite album: Beatles For Sale or Rubber Soul (Depends on the week)

Unpopular/Controversial Beatles opinion: They ARE Bigger/ Better than Jesus. Fight me.

A song everyone loves but you dislike: Fucking Yesterday. Or Get Back.

A song everyone dislikes but you love: ‘Run For Your Life’. It’s a shout out to an Elvis song, and it doesn’t make me less of a feminist for enjoying it.

Your fantasy involving The Beatles: I just want to hang out and smoke some weed with them, listen to them and talk about music.

Tell us about the moment you knew you were a fan: When I watched the “Free As A Bird’ video on ABC when they aired the Anthology. I was 12.

Did you ever have a genuine ‘The Beatles suck!’ phase before becoming a fan?:

I briefly shaded my dad for having a Beatles album he kept in his closet, I was like 11 and thought that they were lame because I had never really listened to them.

Favorite Beatles book: Many Years From Now- Barry Miles

Thoughts on the old generation of fans: They need to wrap their heads around the fact that The Beatles mean LOVE, any kind, between any people. The Het-washing of the group upsets me. I hope the newer generation opens their minds to the true meaning of their music and purpose.

If Hollywood were to make a high budget Beatles biopic, what is one thing you desperately hope they include?: John & Paul’s TRUE relationship.

Do you read/write fanfic?: Yes & Yes

Are you the only one in your family/friend group to enjoy them?: My spouse was raised an Elvis fan! He has since converted, and my children are drinking the Kool-Aid.

Are you a shipper?: Eh, I struggle with this phrase....

Favorite movie starring/made by them?: Help! The stoner in me loves those baked boys being dumb. Plus, great soundtrack!

Do you believe in McLennon?: It’s my religion

General opinions on McLennon?: It’s real, it happened, and it’s tragic.

If you got to change ONE thing about their history, what would it be and why?:

Brian Epstein Lives.

What song has the best vocals?: Anna (Go to Him), This Boy, Girl...John melts me into a puddle when I hear these.

What song do you feel had no effort put into it?: ‘When I Get Home’. The fact that he says, “When the cows come home...” I just cringe. Why was that song given a green light?

What is a well talked about moment in Beatles history you genuinely believe to be false?: How AMAZING Yoko was when her and John met. She stalked him and Paul, and introduced him to heroin in his vulnerable state to wear him down. That’s the tea, sis!

What is something you KNOW to be true, but often gets erased in their history?: John & Paul we probably romantically involved.

Least favorite look from a Beatle(s): John’s long hair/beard on Abbey Road. I can smell him just looking at the pics.

Favorite look from a Beatle(s): 1962, in their leathers with the haircuts before Brian ‘cleaned’ them up! (This is oddly specific)

#the beatles #mclennon #mclennon is real #thanks for the tag #this was fun!#personal opinion

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so-small · 5 years ago

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Connor Murphy x Reader: Scars

soulmate au where you get scars in the same places as your soulmate

words: 1601

warnings: self harm, swearing, mentions of suicide, somewhat angsty(?)

Another day, another scar appeared on your wrist. It was normal to you, but it made it still made you worry. You would worry about your soulmate. It started in your early teens, getting more marks on your arms almost on the daily.

“Hey (Y/N) it happened again. You got few marks.” Your friend Zoe pointed out. The two of you were in the middle of a Princess Diaries movie marathon at her house. You shrugged, looking down at your wrist. “How can you be so calm knowing that your soulmate is hurting themselves like that?”

“They’ve been doing it for awhile, there’s nothing I can do until I meet them. Anyways how’s it going with Evan?” You changed the topic, hoping to make her drop it. You knew how much she liked to talk about Evan.

Zoe turned a bright crimson, “It’s going really good. He asked if he and his friends can sit with us at lunch. I said yes, I hope that’s okay...” She looked down at her lap and said more softly, “I’m really happy he’s mine.”

“I know, I’m glad you guys finally realized you were soulmates. I could see that even without your scars.” You smiled to her and returned to watching your movie.

You were getting ready to head home when there was a loud thump followed by a “fuck”. Zoe and Mr. Murphy quickly rushed you out to the car so they could drive you home before he got worse.

---

Connor was mad at himself. He couldn’t stop the bleeding coming from his arms. Normally it would stop not long after he cleansed his cuts, but today it just wasn’t stopping. He lost his temper and threw his copy of Fahrenheit 451 across the room and shouted, “Fuck” in frustration. He threw himself into his bed, flipping the covers over his head. He sighed and drifted into sleep, hoping that in the morning it will have stopped.

---

Lunch rolled around before you knew it, and you headed to your table where Zoe, Evan, and someone who you assumed to be Evan’s friend were already sitting. You took a seat, and tried to process the conversation that was going on. “And then I was like, ‘I love your new haircut, it’s very school shooter chic’ and he went off on me like some sort of freak.”

“Yeah he’s a psychopath, I’m sorry.” Zoe apologized, “He was super cranky this morning too, like crankier than usual.” Zoe then noticed your presence, “Hey (Y/N)!”

“Hi Zoe, hi Evan. Who’s this?” You questioned, motioning to the dark haired guy with glasses.

He perked up, “I’m Jared, but you can call me your next boyfriend.”

“Got any scars?” You asked, motioning to his arms.

“No but who cares about that silly soulmate stuff when you could have a-”

You held your hands up to stop him. “Not interested, who are we talking about?” Trying to shift the conversation from Jared’s awkward flirting, you decided to ask about the strange conversation.

“Just my brother,” Zoe rubbed her temples trying to calm herself, “He pushed Evan down earlier too.”

Evan started to ramble, “Oh it’s fine, but not like I like getting pushed down kind of fine. I don’t like getting pushed down- I’m not some kind of masochist or something. I don’t like pain, I hate pain-” He stopped himself to the catch his breath.

“Zoe, are you sure he’s okay? He seemed to be having a rough time last night. He didn’t even come down to tell us to shut up.”

She rolled her eyes, “Connor’s fine.”

“As fine as a freak can be.” Jared laughed. “Guy seriously has issues.” As if on a cue, Connor was walking past when Jared was talking. When he approached you caught a slight metallic scent.

“Oh, so you saw me come in and decided to start trashing me again so I’d get angry, well it’s not going to work. I’m not a freak, you’re the freak,” His eyes grew clouded with frustration as he stormed off.

Conflicted, you excused yourself and followed out to the taller Murphy sibling. You weaved through the halls, following the footsteps. You turned the corner and the footsteps stopped, but Connor was nowhere in sight. You looked around and failed to find him. You walked out the nearest exit and leaned against the wall, sinking to the ground with a sigh.

“Oh great, you came after me to make more fun of me. Well go ahead, give me your worst.” A familiar voice said filled with irritation. You looked up to see Connor Murphy’s face, almost filled with sadness? “It’s the last chance you’ll get anyways.”

Shocked, your eyes widened, “Connor, what do you mean last chance?”

“I mean it all ends tonight, I don’t have to deal with this harassment, and the world won’t need to deal with me anymore.” He chipped at his black nail polish.

“Connor-”

“Don’t ‘Connor’ me.” He said, using a high-pitched nasally voice to imitate yours when he said his name. “It doesn’t matter. You shouldn’t care anyways, I’ve never been nice to you. All you know me for is screaming at you and Zoe to shut up when you have your movie marathons.”

“Connor, we both know that’s not all I know you from-”

“Right I forgot to mention that when you stay over for dinner you get to witness me yelling at my parents.” He uncomfortably shifted, “See, you really won’t be missing anything once I’m gone. Everyone’s lives will be better without me.”

“Connor shut up and listen to me, God damn it!” You shrieked, trying to get a word in. He shrank and looked at you like he was a kicked puppy. “Connor, don’t you remember that one time when Zoe and I were ten and you were eleven?” He blankly stared at you, “Zoe and I were playing tag and I tripped over and scraped right above my temple. You’re parents weren’t home and we couldn’t reach the band aids or anything. I thought I was going to die of blood loss.”

“I remember,” Connor said, a smile starting to form, “Zoe went to the neighbor to get some, but the lady offered her cookies and she couldn’t resist. I found you crying in the bathroom, you really did think you were going to die. I got the band aids down and cleaned up your forehead for you.”

“Mhm, and I was still crying because when I got hurt my mom would always kiss them better. I didn’t think I was going to get better if she didn’t kiss it better.”

Connor turned beet red, recalling the next part, he sheepishly scratched his head, “So I, uhm, I,” he lowered his head and mumbled, “I kissed it to make it better.”

“I stopped crying almost immediately.”

“I bet you regret that now.” He pushed his hair back and laughed, “Now you’d probably start crying if I kissed you- er, I mean if I tried to kiss a wound,”

Your eyes widened as you caught a glimpse of a scar above his right temple, exactly where yours was. You felt your scar, almost as you were making sure you still had a scar there, “Connor,” you put your hand on his arm and rolled up his sleeves to reveal his arm covered in scars, “You,” you motioned to your arm and forehead scar, “Did you know?” He nodded, “How long have you known?”

“Since that day...” He pulled his sleeve back down.

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

“You would’ve been disappointed. Heck, you probably are. Sorry you got left with a freak like me.”

“Connor,” You started, “I’m not disappointed that you’re my soulmate.”

“Bullshit. You’re face says it all.”

“I’m not disappointed that you’re my soulmate, I’m disappointed that you hurt yourself so much. I’m disappointed that you felt that way. I’m disappointed that you want to-. Am I not good enough for you? You knew, and you still planned to- to kill yourself?”

Connor gaped at your saddened form, the tears forming in your eyes, the sincerity in your voice. “God, no.” He took a step towards you and wrapped you in a big hug. “That’s not it at all. God, no. I-,I didn’t tell you because I was afraid. But I-, you can do so much better than me, soulmate or not. You’d be able to date anyone you want to.”

“I doubt that. And even if I could I don’t want to.” You looked down, “I’ve liked you way before I knew this. You know I gushed for years about you to Zoe.”

“Really? God, you must think I’m the worst soulmate ever, leaving you with scars all over the place, planning on committing suicide, knowing and not telling you.”

“Connor it’s okay, I get it. We’re going to figure this out together.” You hugged back, “That is if you plan to stick around with me...” You looked up into his eyes.

A sudden rush hit you as Connor’s lips crashed against yours, you kissed back and your lips moved together as time seemed to stop in place. As you separated he looked down to you with a small grin, “As long as I can keep doing that.” You answered by pressing your lips back against his. “Then what kind of man would I be if I said no to my soulmate.” He said with a cheesy smile, “I’m so happy you aren’t disappointed.”

“I’m so happy that I found you when I did.” You muttered burying your head in his chest.

#connor murphy #connor murphy x reader #dear evan hansen #soulmate au #musicals #dear evan hansen x reader #jared kleinman #evan hansen #zoe murphy #fanfiction #deh x reader #deh

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sassy-pelican · 5 years ago

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To Infinity: Part Five

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader

Warnings: Language, fluff, angst, sadness, humor, time jumps, 18+, nsfw, canon typical warnings, a bit of everything. You may not read this story if you are under 18.

Tagging: @holyhumorliteraturelight @crushedbyhyperbole

A/N: Final part everybody. This entire mini-series was an emotional rollercoaster to write and it took me months (I know it only took me 10 days to post, but it was finished by then). I hope everyone enjoyed this as much as I did.

2018

Bucky’s recovery has been going well, far better than the months prior. Rose has taken it upon herself to travel with you every now and then, each time saying she needed another fix of that hunky husband of yours. You don’t blame her, each time you leave it seems to get harder and harder.

Still, through all the bliss, you can’t help but feel like something is wrong. The only time you’ve ever felt something like it was –

“Bucky!” You shout. His head pokes out from the small hut.

“What?”

“Teach me everything you can about combat.”

“I – I – what?”

“I can’t explain it, but I feel it. Something feels wrong, very wrong.”

“Y/N what are you –”

“James … please.” He must hear the sheer desperation in your voice because he nods.

“Y/N, what’s going on?” Steve asks from his place across from you and Bucky.

“I don’t know how to explain it, I don’t even know if I can. I just … something isn’t right. I don’t know if it’s here, or another planet, but something is wrong.”

“What do you mean?” Bucky interjects.

“It feels like twenty-twelve again Steve, that feeling, only worse.”

“Okay, what do you mean it feels like twenty-twelve again? I thought you weren’t in that fight.”

“I wasn’t.” You turn to look at your husband, knowing that secret you’ve been withholding from him isn’t one he’ll take well. “During the battle on the Valkyrie, when the Red Skull activated the Tesseract, I grabbed it.”

“You did WHAT!” Bucky yells. “Y/N –”

“I know it was stupid! But at the time I didn’t care.” You take a shuddering breath and look down at your feet. “At the time all I was thinking about was you. How he, HYDRA, took you from me. How maybe I could’ve protected you, even if I know it’s impossible. I just … I grabbed it. I knew that whatever strange power that thing held, he wanted it, and that I’d rather die than let him have it.”

“What happened?” He asks.

“I absorbed some of it. Not a lot, but enough that I passed out. I don’t remember anything after that; not until I woke up. I don’t know if it did anything, I haven’t gained any type of power or enhancement I didn’t already have. The only thing I can do that I couldn’t is I can sense it. I can sense if whatever’s in that cube is okay or not.”

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I didn’t want you to worry, and I knew you would.”

“Just please, promise me you won’t do something stupid like that again.”

You look up at him, Bucky’s own tear stained face staring at yours. “I can’t. I can’t promise you that, because whatever’s coming, it’s bad.”

You’ve done all you can do, preparation wise with Bucky and the Wakandan team, but that pit in your stomach has only grown. Even now, sitting and watching as Bucky sorts through farm supplies you feel it. Your heart drops as you see T’Challa and some his Kings-guard walk towards him.

You make it next to him just as a high-tech case is placed on the cart in front of you. When someone opens the lid, you can’t say who, you want to vomit. An arm. A metal, vibranium arm, sits in the case.

“Where’s the fight?” Bucky asks.

“On its way.”

“It has something to do with what I’ve been feeling, doesn’t it?”

“I’m afraid so.” T’Challa replies.

“What is it?”

“I don’t know, all I know is that his name is Thanos.”

You and Bucky stay hidden inside as what you’ve dubbed the welcoming committee, greets everyone. “You ready?” You ask.

“Not even a bit.”

“So how big of an assault can we expect?” T’Challa asks the man you recognize as Dr. Banner.

“Uh, sir, I think you can expect quite a big assault.”

“How we looking?” Natasha asks.

“You will have my Kings-guard, the Border Tribe, the Dora Milaje, and …” Bucky steps out before you can, smiling.

“A semi-stable one-hundred-year-old man.”

“And his wife.” You add while watching the two men hug.

“How you been, Buck?”

“Uh, not bad, for the end of the world.”

“How you been Lady Legs?” Sam asks using the dreaded nickname you had hoped died with the Commandos, but thanks to Stevie, it didn’t.

“Oh, you know, hanging in there, birdman.”

“Barnes got you in on that did he?”

“I needed something after you found out about my old nickname.” You joke. “Plus, don’t forget, I’m a Barnes too.”

“Fuck me.” He mutters.

“I’d rather not.”

“I’m gonna head in with Nat and see what’s going on with Wanda and Vision, you guys stay here.” Steve says his Captain America voice already in play. Sam, Bucky, and you all roll your eyes but begrudgingly stay.

“So, how’s life been treating the Barnes’” Sam asks.

“We’re good.”

“Okay.” Sam doesn’t say anything for a while, neither do you or Bucky, but the awkward silence is heavy. “So, um …”

“Sam, we are waiting for an imminent alien invasion and the pit in my stomach is getting bigger with every second. Please shut up.”

“Right.” Sam says. The three of you all look to the sky as something appears. “Hey, Cap, we got a situation here.”

Whatever the thing launched destroys itself when it hits the shield over the city. “God, I love this place.” Bucky says with a small smile on his face.

“Me too Bucky, me too.”

“Did they surrender?” Bucky asks Steve.

“Not exactly.”

You listen as the Wakandan army chants, watch in mild horror as the things from the ships run at the barrier. Every second, that pit in your stomach grows larger. It’s calling you. Gun raised, you ready yourself.

“I love you James.”

“I love you Y/N”

The two of you share a look as the Outriders that managed to come through run at you. Simultaneously, you and Bucky start firing at them. You watch in horror as the ones still outside begin to circle.

“Cap,” Bruce says through comms, “if these things circle the perimeter and get behind us … there’s nothing between them and Vision.”

“Then we better keep ‘em in front of us.”

The firing of your gun and subsequent screams as more and more continue to break through block out the conversation. You don’t hear the agreement on opening the barrier, nor are you prepared for what it brings. You lose sight of Bucky not long after, staring only at mangled limbs and broken bodies of the Outrider you managed to kill.

Even your specialized guns don’t do much good against the things you’re firing at, you’re not quite skilled enough to hit a moving target perfectly every time. But at this point, surrounded by them and out of luck, you’d take just killing one. Distantly you hear it, the sound of Banner screaming. You can’t make out his words, but he sounds happy.

“BRING ME THANOS!” Ah, so that’s the God of Thunder I never met.

You manage to make your way across the field through sheer luck and Thor’s timely arrival just in time to see Steve panting.

“New haircut?” He asks Thor.

“Notice you’ve copied my beard.” He replies.

Impressed by their ability to ignore the fighting around them, even as you are screaming and firing at random, you watch as a walking tree skewers three of the Outriders with his arm.

“By the way, this is a friend of mine. Tree.”

“I and Groot!” And it talks.

“I am Steve Rogers.”

“Can you gentlemen please get your heads out of your asses and help!” You yell.

Thor stares at you in amazement and slight curiosity. “I like her.”

“You can like me later when we’re all not dead!”

The ground rumbles and shakes. Wide-eyed you look and follow it, the buckling ground and machines coming out of it shocks you like nothing ever has before. “Oh shit.” You run, faster than you thought you could in the opposite direction. You manage to jump out of its path just as it shreds the Outriders in your path.

“Thor!”

“M’lady?”

“I need you to hit me with everything you’ve got.”

“I’m sorry?”

“I can’t explain it, but I can take it. Something is happening to me and I think it needs a little jump start. Hit me with everything you’ve got God of Thunder.”

“My power could kill you.”

“It won’t.” He nods, reluctantly. Eyes glowing, he concentrates his power and shoots.

It burns, more than you could imagine, but something else is welling up too, soaking it in. Every cell in your body feels like it’s on fire, but then it just stops. You explode. Every ounce of untouched power given to you all those years ago pours out of you in waves.

“What just happened?” Thor ask as he runs up to you.

“You gave me a jump-start.” You look up and see fallen Outriders surrounding you.

Your eyes catch a glint of familiar metal across the field, surrounded by the bloodthirsty things everywhere. You’re not exactly sure how, but the next thing you know, you’re there, in front of Bucky and power pulsing through you and out into them.

“When did that happen?” He asks, looking to all the dead creatures around you.

“Just now.”

“How?”

“Thor gave me a jump-start.”

You run towards the large purple alien with everyone else, watching from your side eye in horror as Wanda shoots her red tendrils of power at Visions head. Everyone, including you starts firing at him. With a flick of his wrist, you and Bucky both go flying. Your newfound power shields you from some of the fall, but not enough. Spots of black come into view as sounds fade.

The blast of pure energy is what wakes you. Bucky is still face down in the dirt, dead to the world but breathing. You catch a glimpse of his back as he walks toward Wanda, yet Vision is nowhere to be seen. His hand reaches down, and you watch as he touches her head. Your own are fumbling around on the ground as quiet as possible for a gun.

“No!” Wanda screams.

Just as your hands wrap around the handle of one you see him, Vision, with Thanos’s hand around his neck. You snarl, low enough that only can hear, and get up on shaking legs. A few steps and you’re directly behind him as his hand raises. With blood dripping down into your eyes you raise your gun, and fire.

Purplish blood seeps from his neck as he falls to his knees. You pick up the fallen staff beside you and march with unsteady legs to him. Swinging your arms high, you slice his forearm holding the dreaded gauntlet off. Grabbing his large chin with your hand you look him in the eye.

“No one gets to hurt my husband. Not again.” Blood spills from his mouth as he goes limp. You let him drop unceremoniously to the ground in a heap.

“What did you do?” Thor asks, landing behind you as Wanda stares at you while clutching Vision.

“I killed him.”

“What happened?” Steve asks, frantic as he hobbles over to us.

“He’s dead.”

“How?” Steve asks, staring at the body.

“He was distracted by his goal.” You turn to him. “Now, if you’ll excuse me, I am going to go check on Bucky.”

He’s where you left him, groaning as he tries to get up. “W-what happened?”

“We won.”

“Are you okay?”

“Yes, I’m just fine.

Neither one of you knew what to do afterwards. The following days after Thanos more a blur of time than individual days. Still, you and Bucky sat for most of it in companionable silence, something that has always befitted you and him well. And as much as you longed for more, you also knew that now wasn’t the time for any of it.

You could tell he was still mad about the stunt you pulled during the battle. Most of you didn’t care, however, there was a part that was curious. “Why did you do it?” Bucky asks.

“Do what?”

“Save me.”

Of all the things you expected to come out of his mouth, that wasn’t one of them. You expected him to ask why you had Thor ‘jump-start’ you, why you killed Thanos on your own, anything but that. “Bucky?”

“Why did you save me?” He asks again, tears coating the corner of his eyes.

“Because I love you. Because you’re my husband and I love you.”

“I didn’t deserve it.”

“Of course, you did! You do!” you yell, heart breaking. “Your past doesn’t write your future James.”

“It should!” he screams. “It should. I was a monster.”

“What happened?” His sudden relapse sets something off in you, warning bells.

“Nothing.”

“Bucky, what happened that caused this? You were doing better.”

“The battle, it brought so much back. So many memories, nightmares.”

“Come here,” you gesture over to yourself, arms open and waiting. Slowly, follows the silent and almost asking command.

As soon as he’s in your arm, he crumbles. For the first time in days, you know he feels truly safe. It never occurred to you that at this stage something like that could set him back weeks in recovery; it should’ve. As strong as he is, he was broken for so long.

“Why do you still love me?”

“Because I fell in love with you before you were the Winter Soldier,” you reply. “I fell in love with James Barnes of the one-o-seventh, I fell in love with Bucky Barnes, the Howlie. And after I woke up with Steve, I still loved you. I wasn’t the same person you fell in love with back then. The person I was after coming out of the ice, after adapting to a different world wasn’t the same Y/N Y/L/N that you married. And when I found out about you still being alive, I knew. I knew that you wouldn’t be the same man I married all those years ago,” you sigh, running you fingers through his hair, calming his cries.

“I fell in love with you all over again as the new James, as the new Bucky. I fell in love with you all over again even after everything you did and everything you endured because you still had the same heart.”

“How? How can you still love me after all that?”

“James, look at me.” You gently guide his head up to look you in the eyes, hands cradling the sides of his face. “Those kills were made by your hands, not by your heart, not by your mind. The man that is standing here, right now, he didn’t kill those people.”

“But I did.”

“No, you didn’t. They used you as a vessel for destruction, nothing more. You were a shell of a person and they took advantage of that, exploited it. The only reason you can remember doing it is because you were watching it, through your own eyes as your body did things you had no power to refuse.”

“I’m sorry,” he mutters, more tears falling.

“Don’t be. You have nothing to be sorry for,” you say. “I’m sorry that I wasn’t there when you needed me the most.” Your own tears start to fall, matching his.

“I love you.”

“James?”

“What?”

“Can I kiss you?”

“Yes.”

You handed the keys over to Rose, a solemn smile on your face. Tears lined her eyes as she took them. “The shop’s yours.”

“I’m gonna miss you.”

“I’ll be back, I just, you’re running the place now anyway.”

“Can I still come visit every once and a while?”

“Yes. The goats will miss you if you don’t.”

“Only the goats?”

“Hell no,” you say, looking at her through watery eyes. “I’ll miss you every day. It’s just, I need this. I need to know that everything is safe, out of my hands for a while.”

“I’m honored you trust me to be that person Y/N.”

“I’d trust you with my life Rose.”

“And I’d trust you with mine.”

Slowly, very slowly, you saw Bucky start to come out of his shell again. The smiles went from once every few days to once a day, and over the course of months, reassuring done on everyone’s parts, they became almost all the time. He started to cuddle with you at night with less rigidity in his muscles, he’d peck you on the cheek in passing, kiss you on the lips when moved your head in time.

It was dark now, the light of the sky all but gone and replaced by the dull shining of the stars, far clearer than back in New York. “Feed the goats one more time while I shower and then we can catch up on some movies okay?”

“Alright,” he says, smiling a bit as you walk into the small bathroom, the door only cracked.

Just as you turn on the water you hear the door bang shut, the signal that Bucky is outside. The one thing you don’t miss in the waiting for water to get hot. Fortunately for you, and Bucky, the Wakandan’s thought he might have adverse reactions to cold water hitting him unexpectedly and installed state-of-the-art water heating elements.

You even have to admit, you don’t even miss your soap. The ones they gave Bucky don’t only smell nice – subtle but no less pleasing to the nose – they do wonders on dry skin. As you’ve found the hard way, the hot sun is a major player in your suddenly drier skin. Even so, the hot water hitting your back hasn’t changed. The pleasant feeling of that hasn’t altered no matter where you shower.

As you lather yourself up, you try and think of movies he hasn’t seen, of movies you haven’t seen yet. Something tells you to watch an old classic though, it feels right tonight. No matter what you said in the conversation a few days ago, you miss the people you and Bucky were seventy years ago.

The quiet knock on the door startles you. “Doll? You forgot a towel, can I put it on the counter?”

“Oh,” you reply, heart rate slowing, “sure.” You don’t hear him through the spray of the shower, not that you expected to anyway.

“Um, Y/N?”

“Yeah Bucky?”

“Would you mind, I really have to …”

“You have to pee, don’t you?” You’re sure he can hear you sigh and if it was possible, he’d hear you roll your eyes as well.

“Maybe.”

“I won’t look.” It’s hard to resist the temptation though, you haven’t seen your husband naked in over seventy years, and it feels long overdue.

It seems the brilliant Wakandan’s missed one crucial element; the prospect of a flushing toilet while the shower is running. Seconds after Bucky starts zipping your pants you’re screeching and jumping, pulling the shower curtain down as you scramble to get away from the now boiling water.

“FUCK!” The word seems to restart Bucky after his momentary shock and confusion, not soon enough to catch you fully though.

Completely wet and naked, you topple the two of you over onto the tile ground, Bucky grunting as he hits the floor. His arm come around your waist through pure instinct, holding you closer than he has in a long while. Your thigh slips between his; you can feel the halfway zipped pants and what’s beneath them fairly clearly.

“You okay?” Bucky asks.

“Yeah,” you reply, “sorry. I didn’t think the toilet would cause the shower to turn that hot.”

“Sorry.”

“’S not your fault. You didn’t know either.”

He seems to realize that your naked only seconds after he looks you in the eye. “I’m sorry!” Promptly closing his eyes, he goes to move his arms, but you shift, hands going to his shoulders and squeezing.

“Bucky, you’ve seen me naked countless times.”

“Not in this century though,” he says. “Besides, those times were different. You wanted me to see you then.”

“That’s true. Still, I don’t mind,” you reply. “Although, I would like to finish my shower, so I need you to let me up.”

“Oh, right.” He closes his eyes again and carefully lets his arms move to the side as you get up. As he gets up, his shoulder hits the vanity, his knee the toilet and hand on the towel bar, all of which you can’t help but laugh a little at. “What about the curtain?”

“I can take a shower without one,” you say, noting his still closed eyes. “Bucky?”

“Huh?”

“Zip your pants.”

“Shit!”

With careful movements you walk over to him as he frantically tries to feel around for his zipper, which he can’t seem to find in his state. Leaning up you place a small kiss on his cheek as he finally zips the fly. “Go pick a movie love.”

“Anything you have in mind?”

“Something old.”

You’re getting out of the bath, towel wrapped around you and opening the door when you see Bucky on the other side, hand raised to knock. “Bucky? What did you need?”

“I-I nothing. You’d just been in there a while and I wanted to make sure you were okay.”

You stare at him, his nervous smile, shirt sticky from where he’d been working until moments ago, and it hits you. “I want to have sex.”

He chokes, quite literally. It’s only then that you realize you said the thought out loud. “What?”

“I didn’t mean to say that out loud,” you mutter.

“You want to have sex?”

“Yes?”

“Okay,” he says.

“Okay? That’s it?”

“Well I don’t know what else to say. Sex has probably changed since the last time I had it,” he mumbles.

“Not that much! It still goes in the same places, mostly.”

“Mostly?”

“People are far more open to trying different things now.”

“How is it … different?” Bucky asks.

“You’re the one that said it changed not me!”

“Yeah but you answered!”

“There’s a lot more mouth now,” you reply, a little tentative to tell him other things. You still remember him crying the first time you asked him to have sex; of course, you cried too.

“If I’m remembering right, we did that just fine.”

“We did, yes. Um,” you start, “it goes in the other hole too.” He looks at you puzzled, and you mentally slap yourself for bringing this up.

“Other hole?”

“Yes.” He still stares at you, not comprehending where you’re going. “You’re ass Bucky. People do it in the ass now.”

His eyes go wide. “Even if it’s not gay men?” You nod. “Wait, how did you find this out?”

“I may have baptized myself by fire on the internet with new sex things.”

“Meaning?”

“I made the mistake of delving into the depths of porn way too early and unprepared.”

“Should I …”

“NO! Don’t do that, I’ll help in your sexual reeducation slowly.”

It’s days later, lying in bed trying to sleep that Bucky finally tries to get your attention. “Y/N?”

“What?”

“Can we try having sex?”

“Bucky it’s,” you look to the clock on the side of the bed, “three in the morning. I was almost asleep.”

“Oh, sorry.”

“No, no. It’s okay, we can,” you let out a series of yawns, barely awake enough to hold your eyes open. “Can we try in the morning?”

“Yeah.”

“Alright, g’night Bucky.”

“Goodnight Y/N”

You wake up to an insistent poking in your side. Swinging your hand over and hitting the thing keeping you from a dream you hear a quiet grunt.

“Ow.”

“Bucky?”

“It’s morning,” he says.

“Yeah?”

“You said we could try and have sex in the morning.”

You laugh, genuinely laugh at his stupid smile and eagerness. “I haven’t had coffee, or brushed my teeth, or-”

Bucky leans, capturing your lips with his, cutting you off. It’s the first kiss he’s initiated on the lips in weeks. Despite your still half-awake state, you kiss back with as much passion as he is. It’s nice. His hands move to your waist, pulling you on top of him, the cold of his metal arm causing you to stiffen.

“What’s wrong?”

“Nothing, arms just colder than I expected.”

“Sorry.”

“It’s okay, continue.” The two of you move at the same time, foreheads butting against one another in an attempt to continue kissing.

“Okay, that one is all me,” you joke.

“Damn right.”

A final puff of air out your nose in a mock laugh and he kisses you again. Lips working over yours slowly and almost reverently. It’s as if the passion from earlier has escaped him and he wants nothing more than to take his time. Fine by you, anything you can get out of him at this point is good. You just want to touch him.

His tongue slips in your mouth, playing with yours like it was meant to, like it never forgot how. He moves his hands down to your hips, gently pushing you down onto him. As if on instinct you grind down a bit, a primal groan escapes from Bucky’s lips.

“Fuck.”

“We’re not there yet mister.”

“No, we’re not,” he mutters, kissing you harshly, hands moving from your now moving hips to your hair.

Fingers tangle in it, scraping and rubbing your scalp in that delicious way you always liked. When he goes to slip his hand back to your neck, your head moves with it, a sharp tug on the roots not letting him budge.

“Bucky, I think your hand is stuck. I thought it never got stuck in hair?”

“It isn’t supposed to, but I guess that only goes for brushed hair,” he says. “Can’t we just continue and worry about it later?”

“No! One wrong move and half my hair is going to be gone. I don’t want to be bald James!”

“Fine. I guess we’ll try and get it out.”

“No try about it. We are getting your hand unstuck from my head.”

An hour. It took an hour and now the two of you are standing in Shuri’s lab, trying to explain to her the predicament. “It got caught in your hair?”

“Yes.”

“How?”

“Um … well,” you start, not really wanting to finish.

“You were trying to have sex, weren’t you?”

“Maybe.”

She rolls her eyes. “God you two are stupid,” she turns to Bucky. “Barnes didn’t you read the pamphlet I gave you on this arm?”

“No. It’s an arm. I know how to use it.”

“If you’d read it,” she states pointedly, “you would’ve known that there is a small compartment on your forearm that opens, and you can change settings.”

“Where?”

“Here,” she says, moving her fingers and pressing down on a space right beneath the crook of his elbow.

“What do they all do?” Bucky asks.

“Well one of them closes the gaps in the arm. It restricts it movement slightly which is why isn’t default, but I’m going to let you figure out the others on your own.”

“You mean to tell me his arm has a setting, so he won’t get it caught in hair during sex?”

“Yes!” Shuri yells. “That man is a snack! I was not going to give him an arm that allowed him to get it caught when he’s banging someone!”

The two of you spend hours playing and figuring out the buttons, most of which were fairly simple. Although, you have to admit, the detach function was the funniest. Neither you nor Bucky were prepared for it to just fall off. It took a while to figure out how to reattach it too. The fun came to an end when you heard the goats start to scream, apparently wanting their supper.

“Go feed the goats while I work on feeding us.”

“If you insist,” Bucky whines, already putting his shoes back on.

“I do.” As much as you wanted to hurry and change into something sexy to surprise him while you were cooking, you didn’t have anything. One of the last things on your mind lately has been making sure to buy sexy clothes.

Now though, your stomach wants grilled cheese and tomato soup. It’s been awhile since you fixed Bucky grilled cheese, almost long enough that you’ve forgotten what he likes, almost. But with the chill in the air tonight, it seems like a good fit.

“Goats are fed.”

“Good,” you reply, already taking out the various ingredients. “Would you mind starting the soup for me?”

“What kind?”

“Tomato.”

“You fixin’ grilled cheese?”

“’Course.”

The two you don’t speak as you butter the bread and take out far too many slices of cheese than are necessary. No, you don’t speak until the dance you and Bucky have perfected in the small kitchen over weeks is over and you’re sitting at the small table, spoons already full.

“I want to visit New York.” You drop you spoon back into soup with a clang as the words leave his mouth, your own hanging open slightly.

“Okay.”

“I’m not sure if I’m ready to move there, but I want to visit.”

“Are you sure?”

“I think it’s been long enough.”

“Bucky, just because you think enough time as passed doesn’t necessarily mean it has.”

“I haven’t been back in years; I need to go back. Get it over with. The last time I was there, I was still broken.”

“I can see if we can stay with Rose, is that okay?”

“Yeah. I like Rose.”

“She’s a good friend.”

“I’m sorry I took you away from her,” he mumbles.

“You didn’t. I left because I wanted to,” you put down your sandwich, looking at him hard. “James, look at me. When have I ever been known to do something, I don’t want to?”

“Never.”

“Exactly. I wouldn’t have moved here permanently with you if I didn’t want to. I wanted to stay with you, wherever you might be.”

“What about your old apartment?”

“I’m currently renting it out nightly, like an Air B n’ B.”

“Oh,” he swallows loudly. “Do you think we could stay there instead?”

“Of course. I’ll see when it’s not booked and we can stay then, okay?”

“Yeah.”

The entire ride over Bucky was a tension filled mess. Everything about him screamed unease but he refused to let you help. The only thing he let you do was hold his hand as you walked and rode in the taxi. As soon as you opened the door to your apartment though, he eased up, as if all the tension was pouring out of him in waves.

“You okay Bucky?”

“Yeah. It’s just, a lot.”

“I know, far more people than you’re used to.”

“It’s just, I haven’t left Wakanda in years. It feels weird to be somewhere else.”

“Bucky, you don’t have to explain it to me. Just make yourself comfortable, I’m going to be in the shower.”

“Do you want my stuff in your room?” Bucky asks.

“Of course,” you say, “where else would it go?”

“A guest room?”

“James we’ve been sharing a room, a bed, an everything for months now. Just because we’re no longer in your house doesn’t mean that needs to change. Besides,” you smirk, “I don’t have a guestroom.”

“Oh.”

“Now, I’m goin’ to shower.”

He follows you down the hall, the bedroom opposite the bathroom, almost sullen. If you didn’t know any better, you’d think he didn’t want to be here. Even so, the fact that he isn’t comfortable enough to relax in your home yet hurts a bit. You didn’t expect it, you’d hoped, but hadn’t expected him to be the person he is in Wakanda here.

You wait for the water to warm up as you strip off your clothes, smelly from the trip over and the taxi seats that you know haven’t been cleaned in far too long. You’re barely under the water before there’s a knock on the door.

“Hey Y/N? Mind if I come in?”

“You have to use the bathroom?” you ask.

“Yeah.”

“Come on in.” You feel rather than hear the door open, the slight burst of colder air all the warning you get before you heard Bucky start to undo his pants.

“Bucky?”

“Yeah?”

You pause, unsure how you want to say it, to ask it. “Will you – will you join me?”

“Doll?”

“Will you join me, in the shower?” You’re sure he’ll refuse, already preparing yourself to hear his words.

“Okay.” The sound of jeans hitting the ground startles you, although the slow opening of the curtain moments later and his hesitant face warms your heart.

“Bucky,” you start, “why do you still have your boxers on?”

“I didn’t want to make you uncomfortable.”

“I asked you to join me in the shower, I was expecting you to be naked. Take off your boxers.”

Tentatively, he peels off his undershorts, damp from the overspray of the showerhead, and throws them onto the floor. “I don’t know what to do,” he admits.

“Let me wash your hair.” Grabbing the bottle form the shower-caddy you squirt a blob onto your hand, lathering it up before reaching up and massaging it into his scalp.

With careful fingers you rub and soap up his head; with every touch you watch you him relax bit by bit. It isn’t until his shoulders are slumped forward that you stop. “Turn around for me.”

He does it without question, the trust he gives you almost making your heart burst. The water falls over his head, rinsing the soap and sending him further into the realms of relaxation. You run your fingers through his hair, helping the residual soap wash away. Taking the loofa, you begin to rub lightly scented soap over his back.

“Y/N?” Bucky half moans and half asks.

“Yeah?”

“Can I kiss you?”

“Yes.”

Bucky turns, arms snaking around your waist and pulls you close. You don’t have time to really register that you’re both naked and wet before he’s kissing you like he needs it to live. It’s desperate, loving, filled with as much emotion as one can put into a kiss. Your hands mindlessly make their way up to his shoulders, squeezing before trailing up to the ends of his hair.

You don’t realize that you’ve walked backwards until your back hits the cold tile wall, Bucky slotting his hips between yours. It’s delicious. “Bucky,” you gasp as he hesitantly grinds his hips. “Bed.”

“Yes ma’am.”

You hurriedly turn off the water and lead him to the bedroom across the hall, careful not to slip on the hardwood. Neither of you bother to shut the door behind you as you fall back onto the mattress, Bucky climbing to hover over you. He kisses you again, just as deeply before and you can’t help but moan into his mouth.

Raising your hips up to meet his, you push yourself closer to him, letting him feel you again, letting yourself feel him again. You knew by now he could feel how wet you were; how much you want him. The not so subtle grind of his hips against yours and you can feel him hardening. You missed it.

“James,” you breathe shakily.

“I want you so bad,” he moans into your neck.

“Have me.”

His flesh hand trails down your stomach, reaching the apex of your thighs in a tortuously slow pace. Bucky kisses down your neck, nibbling and licking here and there, always just missing the sweet spot you know he hasn’t forgotten about. Fingers bump your clit ever so slightly, not nearly enough and yet too much at the same time. A gentle press and swirl of his fingertip and you arch off the bed.

It’s been too long since you felt a man’s hands below your waist; too long since you’ve had sex for you to savor it like you want to. “Bucky,” you growl, “fuck me.”

“I gotta get you wet sugar,” he mumbles, lips closing around your nipple before he sucks lightly, nipping at it before pulling away with a pop.

“I’m plenty wet enough James,” you hiss, a finger entering you just as you finish off your words. “I need you.”

“But I’m having so much fun.”

“You cheeky bastard.” Your words don’t hold nearly the strength you want them to.

“Only for you.”

“Damn right.”

He doesn’t need more prompting. Lining up his shaft with your entrance he slowly sinks into you. The stretch is both agonizing and delicious. You want nothing more than for him to just pound into you mercilessly but with every miniscule shift, you feel yourself start to get lost in him.

It seems like hours before he bottoms out, his pubic bone rubbing against your clit, the friction wonderful. He doesn’t move, even you when clench around him, hoping to spur him on. “James,” you gasp, “fucking move.”

He does. Practiced and notice hips slam into yours with vigor. Every sound of skin against skin sends a jolt straight to your core. “Fuck! Y/N,” he moans.

Your own moan is all he gets before you pull him down to you, lips crashing into his with intense passion. Every cell in your body is lit up, fire is coursing through your veins and all you want is to shower Bucky in every ounce of it.

Maybe it’s the fact that you haven’t had a proper orgasm since before he fell, it could be all the pent -up feelings that needed release since nineteen-forty-five, or a combination of both. All you know is that with another thrust of his hips, he has you coming harder than you remember ever coming.

“I love you,” you moan, spasming around him. The tight clenching causing his own release to crash over him in waves.

“I love you too.”

2019

You look around the table, all the faces of people you love sitting around it; Steve, Nat, Sam, Rose, Tony, everyone. You hadn’t planned on cooking for everyone, not in your tiny apartment but you did, and not a scrap of it was left.

“To what do we owe the occasion?” Steve asks.

You turn to Bucky, an unspoken question in your eyes to which a small smile is your answer. “Bucky and I will be staying here permanently.”

“What about the goats?” Sam asks, completely ignoring the cheers from everyone else.

“Well, I talked to my landlord and since we had all three of them certified as therapy animals along with trained, he said we could keep them here.”

“You’re really staying in New York?” Rose asks next, tears in her eyes.

“Yes, we are.”

“I suppose you want your old job back then,” she teases.

“No, the shop is still yours, although I wouldn’t mind if you hired me back.”

“I can do that.”

Steve looks to you and his old friend, eyes wet and face holding every emotion you can think of. “You’re really staying Buck?”

“Yeah, I’m really staying.”

You’re loading the dishwasher when you hear footsteps behind you. Even through the years you still know they’re Steve’s. “Wanna help?”

“Sure, start rinsing.”

Silently he does as you tell him, both of you listening to the sound of Bucky laughing in the living room with everyone else. “Thank you for helping him get back to himself.”

“I didn’t do anything Steve. I just let him navigate the world on his own, I only held his hand while he did.”

“You did more than that and you know it.”

You look up to him, tears staining your own eyes. “Well, thank you for bringing him back to me.”

“I’d do it again any day.”

You nod, wiping the wetness from your cheeks. “Grab the champagne for me, will you?”

“Top shelf?”

“Always.”

Steve follows you back into the living room, bottle in hand while you hold a tray of empty glasses. Silently you pour everyone a glass, Bucky eyeing you the entire time. You know he notices the slight redness to your eyes, and you hate it. Placing your hand on his shoulder you lean down, kissing his forehead, letting him know they’re happy tears.

“I propose a toast,” you say formally, everyone cracking a smile. “A toast to new beginnings.”

“To new beginnings,” everyone cheers.

You look over to Bucky, eyes locking with his for the briefest of moments and you know. You know that no matter what you will always have him, he will always be there. Because if anyone can keep up with you it’s him, him and his wonderful heart. A heart than you will love until the end of time, one that belongs to a man that would follow you to infinity.

#bucky barnes #steve rogers #avengers #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes fluff #bucky barnes angst #bucky barnes smut #bucky barnes fanfiction #infinity war #avengers infinity war

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neverforgetkpop · 4 years ago

Text

Beautiful Mess | Pt. 09

Summary: Running from her past never seemed like something she would find herself doing, but if she wanted to stay alive she had to hide. Making her way back to Korea for the first time since she was a baby, Yuna is thrown into a life full of hiding unaware that the roof she’s hiding under is not as incognito as it should be if she wants to survive. Yuna suddenly faces 7 men who change her life, 7 men that can either save her or destroy her, and one man that can remind her of who she was before her life turned dark.

Rating: M

Pairing: Namjoon & Yuna/Reader

Genre & Warning: Strangers to lovers. Mentions of physical abuse and possible other traumas. Angst, eventual fluff and intimacy.

A/N: This is my first fanfic in years, and most importantly my first BTS fanfic. I named the female character Yuna, but you can change her name to yours if you want. It’s written in 1st person. I feel like I should add the (obvious) disclaimer that the story is not real, and though the characters are inspired by the boys, they are not the boys.

PS. The name of the story is inspired by the song Beautiful Mess by Kristian Kostov if you want to check it out.

PT 01 / PT 02 / PT 03 / PT 04 / PT 05 / PT 06/ PT 07 / PT 08

____________________________________

I looked at myself in the mirror running a hand through my short hair. It truly made me feel different and it was so odd. I was never someone who thought a haircut could change you, but I was in the wrong. I gave it one last shake and made my way to the kitchen.

“I thought she wasn’t supposed to leave the apartment,” Yoongi yawned sitting on the couch. The rest of the boys except Namjoon were eating breakfast.

All eyes fell on me as I walked in. “Good morning,” I could barely hear my own voice. Where they talking about me?

“Good morning,” Hoseok smiled walking up to me. “Did you sleep well?”

I nodded silently taking a seat next to Jin.

“We heard you went shopping last night. It’s so unfair,” Jimin mumbled.

“Don’t make her feel guilty about it,” Jin snapped at him over the table.

“How did you know?”

“Well, you were actually caught,” Jungkook said tentatively.

I could feel dizzy all of a sudden. “Wh-what?”

“Well, technically Namjoon and his cousin were caught.” Taehyung offered a sheepish smile.

“Excuse me?”

“Will you stop. You’re confusing her. She’s looking pail already,” Hoeseok snapped at them handing me a plate of food and a glass of juice. “Seems like you were both photographed saving a little boy. Our people handled it though. It helped that you were fully covered so everyone thinks your Namjoon’s cousin visiting,” he explained slowly with a soothing voice. I could tell he was trying to reassure me, but I could still hear my heart pounding in my ears.

“And th-they believed that?” I stuttered holding the glass of juice on both hands concentrating on the coolness burning my hands.

“They did,” Jin reassured.

“That didn’t stop hyung from bursting in this morning.” Jimin added nervously.

“My uncle? He was here?”

“He’s been chewing Namjoon’s ear for the last hour actually.”

“Where? Where is he?” I stood up quickly.

“I think it would be best if you waited for him to finish” Jin looked at Hoseok.

“Please tell me where they are.” I insisted.

Hoseok led me down their hallway. Eventually I could hear my uncle’s voice coming from a closed room. I knocked.

“Not now,” he shouted. I took a deep breath and opened the door. Namjoon sat on a chair with my uncle towering over him. My uncle looked at me first. “Yuna, I think you should wait for me outside.”

Namjoon then looked up at me. I looked at him and then back at my uncle. “It’s not his fault.”

“Wait for me outside,” he repeated. I could tell he was upset.

“No. He didn’t do anything wrong. He was helping me. I was the one who ran to stop the kid.” I stood my ground.

“Yuna, it’s ok,” Namjoon tried reassuring me.

“No. It’s not. I don’t think you should take any blame for anything. No-one got hurt, that’s all the matters.”

“No-one got hurt?” my uncle repeated. I could tell I hit a nerve. “May I remind you that you’re in hiding and that you went out in public with a member of the world’s biggest boy band in the world? Yes, it’s your fault as well as his. He should know better. He knows what measures to take not to be seen and I trusted him to take those measures. You trusted me to trust him to take those measures. You know how worried I was? How worried I’ve been since I picked you up in the airport? I’m trying to keep you safe from-”

“Uncle!” I shouted. My body was trembling, I could feel waves of nausea taking over as my eyes blurred. I knew I was a burden, but I didn’t know how much. Namjoon had made me feel safe, the boys had made me feel so safe inside this apartment that I had let myself think it would be ok to leave just for a second. I had forgotten that they weren’t just a regular group of boys, that I wasn’t a regular girl living with them. I was running to save my life and I had made a huge mistake.

Namjoon suddenly stood between us, closer to me like a wall facing my uncle. “Hyung, please. I’ll take the blame but stop shouting at her.”

“You’re leaving with me this instant.”

I looked up at him. I didn’t want to leave.

Namjoon stood full between us, covering me from my uncle. “Hyung, she’s safe here. I promise. This won’t happen again. No-one recognized her.”

“I know there won’t be a next time because she’s leaving.”

“Hyung please. Let’s just calm down. You know we can help.” Namjoon tried again.

“Hyung he’s right,” suddenly the boys stumbled in.

I looked at them, all of them. They wanted me to stay.

“We’ll all be better. We’ll take care of her.” Jimin chimed in.

“We might not know why Yuna is staying here, but we want to help her.” Jungkook followed.

“Namjoon might’ve made a mistake but you couldn’t expect Yuna to stay locked in forever. We just need a better plan.” Hoseok added.

I took a deep breath trying to stop the tears and the shaking in my hands before stepping next to Namjoon to face my uncle. I could feel Namjoon next to me, unmoving, the boys behind us as well. I didn’t feel alone, I felt protected. “I’m sorry,” my uncle looked at me. “I’m sorry I made you worry. I’m sorry I’ve made you worry. I know everything you’ve done for me, and everything you’re still doing. There are no words to express how much it means to me uncle,” I could see the anger in his eyes start to fade. I bowed. “I’d like to stay here. Please,” I waited in the bow and noticed Namjoon bow beside me. I could tell the boys did the same from the corner of my eye.

My uncle sighed loudly. “These kids,” he mumbled. “Fine.” We all straightened up and looked at him. He rubbed his forehead. “You can stay but we are making new rules. And we are making sure the story of you being Namjoon’s cousin is bulletproof,” he pointed at all of us.

“Does that mean we call you noona or hyung now?” Jimin laughed.

I smiled sadly at my uncle stepping close to him. “Thank you.”

“I would do anything for you,” he said. My eyes teared as he pulled me into an unexpected hug. I wrapped my hands around him to hug back before we both let go. He turned to Namjoon and the boys. “If you think we’re not going to sit down right now to discuss the new rules you are mistaken.”

“Did you have breakfast hyung?” Jin offered with a smile as they all made way for my uncle to leave the room.

I laughed watching them go. Namjoon laughed shaking his head before looking at me. “I’m sorry,” he stood in front of me.

I shook my head. “I’m the one that needs to apologize.”

“How about we both apologize and make sure to do better next time?” he offered his hand.

I smiled and shook it. “I think that sounds good.”

He gently turned my hand in his. “How’s the wrist doing?”

I smiled. “It’s a bit tender, but not bad.”

“Let’s get a brace just in case.”

“There’s no need. Really,” I laughed feeling shy as he kept holding my hand checking for bruises.

“Nonsense,” he said letting go. “Let’s get that before heading to the kitchen. I think your uncle would have my head if he found out we didn’t take care of this,” he smiled gesturing to follow him out of the room.

I smiled and nodded following him.

Tag List: @apurpledheart @whosaidididthat

#bts fic #bts fanfiction #bts fan #bts army #bts namjoon #beautiful mess fic #bts au #bts au fanfic #namjoon #fic #namjoon fanfiction #rm fanfic

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txladyj-blog · 5 years ago

Text

This Time Around - Chapter 1

This is posted with permission from @xmistressmistrustx, the amazing writer who helped me bring a story I had in my head into the world. She’s been an inspiration and has become a dear friend, one I hope to meet in person someday.

A Daryl Dixon x OFC collaboration written by @xmistressmistrustx by request of @txladyj-blog

Rating: Explicit

Relationship: Daryl Dixon/Original Female Character

Tags: Friendship, Friends to Lovers, Awkwardness, Awkward Flirting, Awkward Crush, Fluff and Humor, Angst and Humor, Mild Smut, Strong Language, Eventual Sex, Eventual Romance, Slow Burn, Canon Divergence, Some Canon Scenes and Dialogue

Chapters 23/?

Screaming. High-pitched, desperate screaming, piercing the air and echoing all around, bouncing off the trees like rubber balls, ricocheting and growing louder with every thud of her boots on the dry, cracked ground. Or, was that her imagination? Her heartbeat thrummed in her head as she sucked in breaths to try and propel herself forwards, her chest burning with every gasp and her feet aching after each rapid step. She scolded herself for every single excuse she’d thought up to stop herself from going to the gym, or for a jog, or to the tennis courts. She really wished she wasn’t so inclined to sitting inside and gaming or reading. If she’d known she’d need such stamina to save herself from the jaws of another human being, she’d have jumped on a treadmill occasionally.

Twigs broke under her boots as branches snapped at her sweat covered face but still, she pushed on, further into the woods, away from the screaming. The snarling grew quiet as the inferno in her lungs grew hotter, her breathing became labored and she stumbled, her hands shooting out and grabbing at a nearby tree. Bark and dirt filled her mouth and obscured her view. She blinked, only to find her vision blurred by mud. It took a few precious seconds for her to realize that she’d fallen before she quickly hauled her body upright and carried on along her jagged path through the woods.

She thought there had to have been at least ten people behind her when she had flown off into the tree line from the highway, all terrified with eyes bulging and hearts hammering. Now, her surroundings had fallen quiet and it occurred to her that she was wandering alone in the thick darkness, meandering between trees with no weapons or idea where she was headed. She stopped in her tracks, leaning against the trunk of a tree and trying to catch her breath. Her ears strained to hear the slightest sounds around her so she could sprint off at any hint of danger. Her hands found the straps of her back pack, tugging it from her shoulder and swinging it around to her front. Inside, she selected a torch and quickly flicked the switch. A bright, beam of light shot through the velvet dark, illuminating her surroundings and proving that she was now alone. She swallowed hard and gradually edged around the trunk, shining the torch between the surrounding trees and listening, above the sound of her own breathing for the slightest snap of a twig of a distant groan.

She was walking the highway after being unable to drive any further. The city saw thousands upon thousands of people flee when the chaos hit and spread like wildfire. She watched from a distant hill as the roads filled up with panicked, angry refugees that were offering each other money and all manner of expensive and luxury items for passage out of the highly populated area that had fast become a death trap.

After losing her companion shortly after fleeing into the woods, she was forced to shake off the shock of what she had witnessed. Her best friends throat ripped out in a split second, a river of crimson blood flooding over his bright, white clothing, the contrast somehow making the horrendous scene even more macabre. With no time to cry, no breaks in which to grieve, she raced off with blurry eyes into the night with her friend’s assailant hot on her heels, snarling and snapping its jaws until the sound was gradually replaced by the terrified screams of others, dotted about in the trees around her.

She kept walking until her heels ached and her knees grew weary and her stomach grumbled so loudly, she wrapped her hands around it to muffle the sound. Knowing she had to get some rest, she chose the sturdiest looking tree she could find and began to climb, her hands gripping the harsh bark and heaving her weary body up the structure until she was perched on a thick branch that was wider than her own body. She settled against the trunk. The contents of her backpack dug into her spine but she cared little for anything except being able to rest someplace that meant she wasn’t about to be consumed by what once was somebody’s son or daughter, somebody’s husband or wife. Now, just a ravenous, monstrous shell of what they were.

When she awoke, light shone through the trees, a slither hitting her face and heating up one cheek. She blinked and shook her head before leaning over the edge of the branch and checking it was clear to climb down. Finding nothing, she was soon ambling back over the leafy ground in search of some semblance of shelter.

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Carol watched as her young daughter gently plucked at the fabric of her doll. Such delicate fingers poised over the cloth face of an effigy she’d become attached to ever since she was a baby. She was a quiet child, even more so since they’d arrived at the camp. She’d seen things no one of her age should have, the same things that other children across the world had now seen. Not to mention the violence she’d witnessed before the turn. Violence at the hands of her own father. Carol’s heart hurt for her and not only the memories she would have to carry, but the new, even more brutal things she was unavoidably going to have to endure in her bleak and uncertain future.

Her dirty blonde hair glistened in the sun and her skin, still so young and flawless, had yet to display the pallid gray that some of the others had. Her freckles were still noticeable and each one reminded Carol of the times when she’d cradle the girl in her arms, counting the subtle dots across her nose and smiling to herself.

“Mom?” Sophia squeaked from the waters edge.

The quarry boasted a deep, teal body of water that provided the camp with a means to wash clothes, bodies and was a much-needed source of drinking water once boiled of its impurities. The blazing sunshine, intense temperatures and picturesque view from the top made it the ideal place to set up and stay for a while and most of the camps population had no designs on moving anywhere.

“Yes, sweetheart?” Carol cooed back.

“There’s a woman up there.”

The small girls tiny finger extended, pointing out a lone figure stood, buckled over at the top of the quarry. A red backpack was hanging from the woman’s shoulders and she used the front of her black T-shirt to wipe sweat from her forehead, exposing a pale stomach. Carol squinted and slowly got to her feet, shielding her eyes from the sun in order to gain a better view. Her brow furrowed and her heart began to race in her chest.

“Shane!” She suddenly shouted, her voice thrown around the quarry and traveling up the hill to the main camp. “Come on, Sophia. Come with me. We have to go and get Shane.”

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She had been at the camp for three days before she summoned up the courage to talk to anyone. An introvert by nature and traumatized by her experience, she chose to retreat into her tent and sleep while others went about their daily tasks. She ate alone, sat alone and read her books alone. Carol was the woman that first approached her at the top of the quarry, flanked by a group of four men. She didn’t remember the names of any of them at the time, only Carol’s as she backed away like a frightened deer. Coaxed along to the camp on the promise of food and a tent, she hadn’t breathed a word then and still hadn’t as she sat, hugging her legs and peering up at everyone on the third evening.

She flinched when a man crouched down in front of her and offered her a square, metal camping bowl of food. She didn’t care what it was, her stomach protested loudly at its emptiness and she slowly took the bowl from his hands. Carol had been the one to make sure she ate, it was always Carol. Nice, non-threatening, motherly Carol. Now, it was this man with his sunken eyes, dark, military haircut and thin lips.

“How you doin’?” The man asked.

She half shrugged, not able to manage much more for fear of having to get into a conversation.

“I don’t know if you remember, but I’m Shane. Over there…” He pointed to a man dressed in a sheriff’s uniform. “…That’s Rick. Then ya got T-Dog next to him and then Glenn. That’s just some of us. You’ve been pretty quiet; just thought I’d let you know who people are. You need anything, just ask anyone, OK?”

She nodded a thanks and leaned forwards, taking a small sniff of her food. Some kind of meat stew, laden with herbs. It was the most amazing thing to grace her nostrils in four days.

“You got a name?” Shane asked.

“J-Jess.” She uttered through chapped, cracked lips.

“Well, Jess. I know you’re scared n’ all. We all are. But you’re safe here.” He assured her.

“OK. T-Thank you.” She stammered, picking up a spoon from the bowl and beginning to stir her food.

When Shane left her, she hungrily demolished the stew and picked up her journal from beside her. She knew she’d soon run out of ink for her pen and resigned herself to the fact that she would at some point, need to ask someone to fetch her a new one from one of the supply runs they seemed to frequently go on. As she scribbled, jeering from the other side of the camp caught her attention and she glanced up to see two more men emerge from the trees, one was carrying a crossbow, his sleeveless arms shiny in the light as he approached the glow of the fire with a string of squirrels hoisted over his shoulder. He wore a leather vest and his expression was sour, despite the cheering and jokes being cracked by his companion. The other man was visibly older, bald and also wore a leather vest, he swung a dead opossum by his side as he walked, soon throwing down in front of the fire with a dusty thud and laughing.

“What would y’all do without us, huh?!” He cried with a voice louder than any of the others Jess had heard so far. From his body language and his attitude, she could tell this one was going to be trouble.

Jess saw Shane get to his feet and whisper to the man to keep the noise down, but he was met with nothing but a snarl. The man with the squirrels was already stalking over in the direction of Jess’s tent, suddenly veering off and slamming the dead animals onto a makeshift table and propping his crossbow against the structure at his feet.

“Merle, get ya ugly ass over here. I’ma get to skinnin’ these.” He announced.

Jess retreated back into her tent in an attempt to stay out of the sightline of both men, judging them both to be the kind of people she would have steered well clear of before she found herself running through the woods for her life.

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In the time it had taken for Carol to persuade Jess to emerge from her tent and meet some of the others, her presence at the camp was now being noticed by just about everyone. She had briefly conversed with the younger members of the group; Carl, who was Rick and Lori’s son and Sophia, Carol and Ed’s daughter. Children were altogether less intimidating and energy draining than adults could be to Jess, especially in such a setting, where noise and rigorous activity needed to be kept to a minimum, as were the rules.

There were two other girls of Jess’s age which she deliberately steered clear of without hesitation, Sarah and Jodie. Initially met with outwardly false smiles and raised eyebrows, the transparency of the two females that peered back at her was evident and enough to make sure she knew her place was not with them. Her history with female friends not being one to shout about, other women never seemed to take to her due to her obscure and nerdy interests and quiet nature. Constantly a source of ridicule at high schools she'd attended, she kept herself to herself and spent her free time at comic book stores and conventions with her handful of close, male friends she would undoubtedly make eventually. All of which were now dead.

The loud man from the previous night, whose name she had learned was Merle, had already proved that her suspicions about him being trouble were correct. Jess always knew to trust her gut; it hadn’t let her down yet. Walking past her as she hurried along behind Carol, he slowly looked her up and down, running his tongue along his bottom lip and rubbing his chin. Beside him, was the other man in the leather vest, his younger brother; Daryl.

“Ain't she a meaty one? Lil’ more cushin’ for the pushin’, huh, Daryl?” He sneered.

His brother merely glanced up and caught Jess’s eye as she passed, his blue irises flashing before her. She had never seen such icy blue eyes before.

“Shut up, Merle” She heard him mutter in response.

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Since arriving at the camp, Jess hadn’t seen any of the dead ones. She figured she’d wandered so far up the mountain, that hardly anyone alive, let alone dead would be likely to follow her. She noticed that they had coined the name ‘Walkers’ by those around her and felt safe in the knowledge that no one had seen one enter the camp for weeks due to the surrounding makeshift alarms comprised of tin cans and other noisy materials. Whispers around the campfire had indicated that the city was full of them and they were now starting to run out of food and disperse into the surrounding areas.

Sat in her usual spot just inside her tent, she jotted down what she thought was the date at the top of the next page of her journal, although she couldn’t be sure if it was correct or not. Giggling in the distance caused her to look up, where she clocked the unmistakable sight of Sarah and Jodie making fun of her from across the clearing. Jess couldn’t help but lift an eyebrow in disgust at the typical nature of their body language. Hands deliberately blocking mouths as they spoke, eyes intermittently locking on her and childish giggling that she expected from the likes of Sophia or Carl, but not from two women in their twenties. She shook her head and sighed, turning her attention back to finishing the date on the page when her eyes lowered further, to the extra flesh around her middle, her thicker thighs than the other girls, even her fingers. Bigger, softer. She flattened her hand on the page and sighed. Then, screaming rang out across the camp.

Everyone seemed to move simultaneously, grabbing at everything that could be used as a weapon. Jess froze to the spot until she saw Carol making her way towards the children with several others and whisking them away. Curiosity fueled her to move and find out how high the threat was, knowing she needed to keep a safe distance but still get close enough to see what the fuss was about.

Just inside the tree line, Dale, owner of the groups RV and resident, straw hat lookout was busy beating the hell out of a single Walker with Rick and some of the others with blunt objects, bats and even a broom. Jess looked on in disbelief at the Walker that had eventually fallen to the floor and quietened, beside it, lay a deer with an arrow in its rear end and a myriad of bite marks taken out of its side. The small huddle of people exchanged glances, their chests all rising and falling.

“Never seen them this far up the mountain before” Dale commented.

“Well, they’re running out of food in the city” Carol remarked to the cluster of concerned and sweaty faces.

“Son of a bitch!” Came another, angry voice from further back. “That’s my deer!”

Daryl emerged from the bushes, crossbow in hand, sweat beaded on his chest and forehead, yet more dead squirrels thrown over his shoulder and ripped the crossbow bolt from the deer’s rump with one swift movement.

“Look at it, all gnawed on by this filthy, disease-bearin’, motherless, poxy, bastard!”

With each new word, his boot collided with the Walkers body on the floor, Jess sidestepped slightly to gain herself a better view of him in his entirety through the bushes.

“Calm down, Son. That’s not helping” Dale scolded.

“And what do you know ��bout it, ol’ man?! Why don’t you take that stupid hat and go back to ‘on golden pond’? I been trackin’ this deer for miles!”

As he finished his sentence, the Walker at his feet began to writhe and gnash its jaws. Jess felt her throat constrict at the thought of it not being dead and wondered just how the hell they were meant to be stopped if gunfire emitted too much noise.

“Oh my god” Glenn groaned as he resumed beating the corpse with a stick.

“C’mon, people! What the hell?!” Daryl exclaimed as he aimed at the Walkers head with his crossbow and pulled the trigger. A neon bolt embedded in its skull and instantly, the threat was eliminated. “It’s gotta be the brain. Don’t y’all know nothin’?”

Retrieving his bolt from between the Walkers eyes, he huffed and threw everyone an exasperated look. Before she could even think, Jess found herself face to face with him as he stormed through the brush, unexpectedly running into her. She quickly stepped back and tried to drop her gaze, but his stare was so intense that she found herself rooted to the spot while he paused to take in the view of her. She swallowed hard and finally managed to step aside and let him pass. When he did so without a word, she almost tried to blink the shock from her eyes as she turned on her heels and made her way back to her tent.

That night she braved sitting around the campfire with everyone else at dinner, although she sat further back than the rest. Nibbling on strips of squirrel, Jess didn’t follow any conversations that were taking place. Opposite her, sat even further back than her in the shadows, was Daryl, who had just finished up licking excess meat from his fingers and was now watching her over the flames, his arms draped over his bent legs. She was aware that his attention was firmly fixed on her and grew increasingly uncomfortable under his scrutiny. Why was he looking at her like that? Why was he looking at her at all?

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After another two days, Jess was still finding it hard to settle in amongst the masses at the camp. Only speaking briefly to a handful of people, she decided that Carol was the easiest person to converse with, except Rick, who never seemed to give her a choice but to answer when he asked after her welfare. Her days were spent reading, writing or tagging along with Carol by the water and helping with the laundry. Her knowledge of certain historical periods meant she knew how to wash clothes without the aid of a washer dryer and was able to lend a hand in getting through the huge piles of dirty clothes that appeared in the crate at the start of each day.

Carol wasn’t shy about encouraging Jess to learn new skills and on one particular occasion, caused a great deal of anxiety when she handed her a knife and a pile of dead squirrels and told her to start skinning them. Before Jess could protest or express her ignorance on such a subject, Carol had vanished from sight, summoned by her aggressive and overbearing husband, Ed. Her hand shook as she looked down at her fingers clutching the knife, Daryl’s presence on a rock behind her niggling away in her mind. If anyone knew how to skin squirrels, it would be him. She turned her body slightly so as to block his view and began prodding one of the small animals with the sharp end of the knife.

Daryl, able to see over her shoulder from his higher vantage point, furrowed his brow and threw his smoke away. He climbed down from the rock and approached her.

“Kinda shit show is that? Give it here.” He snapped, reaching for her knife. She stilled, wide eyed and tried to focus on what she should say.

She slowly looked sideways at him with the squirrel in her hand. She still gripped the knife and he beckoned with his fingers for her to pass it to him along with the dead animal. She gingerly handed him him both and stepped aside, letting him take up her spot. Before he set to work, he noticed her discomfort and awkward expression.

“She uh-she left before I could tell her I have no idea what I’m doing.” She said quickly.

He grunted and turned his head to see Carol with Ed, whose voice was raised and echoing around the quarry. Shane stood nearby, arms crossed, keeping a very close eye on the arguing couple. Ed’s arms were flailing in the air as Carol stood meekly in front of him. Daryl bit his bottom lip for a second and decided to leave them to it, getting involved in other people’s drama wasn’t something he made a habit of. He turned his attention back to Jess.

“What exactly do ya do around here?” He asked her.

It was a good question and one she didn’t have much of an answer to. Since she’d arrived, she slinked about in the shadows, folding her collectible superhero T-shirts that she happened to have bought on the day the world went awry and scribbling in her journal. She’d only recently started to lend a hand with the laundry but other than that, she could honestly say she’d been nothing but a leech.

“Um… I got a pretty loud scream. It’s like a…Walker alarm. Just haven’t used it yet.” She said with a small smile.

He huffed, unimpressed and figured she would be even more useless unless he showed her what to do with the knife and the squirrel.

“Pay attention.” He mumbled, motioning to the animal with the knife. “Gotta start right here, cut up to the tailbone”

As he spoke, he physically showed her what to do, pointing out each part and showing her exactly how to angle the knife in the process. Jess winced at the sound of the knife slicing through the flesh and tried to act as though the blood didn’t bother her. But she was never a good liar and her stomach flipped at the sight. Her face paled and she took a deep breath.

“Then, down each leg. Gotta make a flap of skin on each. Can grab it and yank it right off, cut as ya go.” He explained, focused on his task and missing Jess’s pained expression. He ripped the skin from the animal and tossed it aside before holding the bloodied knife out to her and finally noticing her pallid skin and sweaty forehead.

“R-right.” She stammered, slowly taking the knife from him.

“Practice. Make ya self useful.” He said, his tone now less antagonistic and more akin to someone with a helpful suggestion.

“Right. Yeah.” She mumbled, taking the knife back and dragging the back of her wrist across her forehead.

Relief washed over her when he finally departed, leaving her to her task. While it took her probably double the time it would have taken Daryl, she eventually finished it and cleaned up with a sense of pride and accomplishment welling in her chest.

=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=

'I'm not entirely sure I’ll ever fit in with this group. I know I don’t really fit in anywhere else either, but no matter how hard I try, I always seem to get left behind. Since I’ve been here, I’ve been thinking a lot about mom and dad and my asshole brother who I miss so much. Seeing people that still have their families, I hope they know how lucky they are. I know I never really fit in with them either, but they were my blood.

It’s a miracle I survived on my own, I see that even more now I’m around people with actual survival skills. There are fighters, hunters, people that are good with weapons, even people that think more strategically than me. I feel kind of useless. I’m slower and a liability compared to these people. A guy called Daryl had to teach me how to skin a squirrel today. I almost hurled on the table in front of him and I felt like an idiot at first but at least he took the time to show me instead of making fun of me. If I’m honest, I was really expecting the latter.'

She closed the journal. Shoved it back in her bag and slung it over her shoulder. Then, she picked up the bunch of skinned squirrels and made her way to the top of the hill. The heat from the sun was starting to lessen and she was grateful for it, she wasn’t used to building up much of a sweat, so her new surroundings up in the sky, a top a mountain had been a shock to the system. People wandered about the camp and children played quietly as the fire in the middle started to intensify, ready to provide warmth from the sudden cold snap that came as soon as the sun vanished below the horizon.

Jess spotted Merle on the outskirts of the group. He sat with a tree stump in front of him and a large knife, dissecting meat and driving it onto skewers for cooking. Jess took a deep breath and made tracks towards him, passing the RV in the process, where Daryl sat on the roof, watching her. She kept her head up when passing Sarah and Jodie, Sarah brushing through her blonde hair with her fingers as they ambled along.

“Better get in quick before she eats every scrap. Girl definitely isn’t starving.” Jodie whispered to her friend.

The comment hit Jess’s chest like a bulldozer but outwardly, her reaction was minimal. She carried on walking and handed the squirrels to Merle wordlessly before turning on her heel and stalked off back to her tent. She could hear Merle chuckle to himself behind her but paid him no mind. He wasn’t the one that could stamp on her feelings so easily. It was other girls. Always other girls.

Daryl was noisily chewing on some beef jerky when he heard Jodie’s scathing comment and saw Jess hesitate as she walked, her head dropping and her shoulders slumping. Sarah and Jodie rounded the RV on their random path and as Daryl looked down at them, his eyes fell on a cup of water set down on the roof of the RV, near to the edge. The temptation proved too great to ignore. Dale must have left it there. Convenient. He kicked the cup, sending water flying over the edge and onto the heads of the two girls below.

“Hey! Watch it, Redneck!” Sarah shrieked as she flicked her hands out, ridding herself of any water droplets. Jodie merely stood there and seethed, her jaw clamped shut and her eyes narrowed up at Daryl. Her sweater was splattered with a dark and no doubt, cold stain.

“Sorry” He smirked.

Rudely awoken by a cooking pot being thrown against the side of her tent just before sunrise, Jess startled and considered herself lucky the foreign object that had collided with the canvas had missed her head by inches. She crawled out of her sleeping bag and poked her head out of the zipper to the sounds of Merle and T-dog shouting obscenities to each other and brawling in the middle of the clearing. Curse words were yelled and a plethora of racist remarks left Merle’s mouth as he swung another punch in T-dogs direction. Jess winced at the sound of some of his comments and thought herself grateful she’d been brought up in an accepting and open-minded family and didn’t have to endure the seething hatred Merle seemed to feel every time he set eyes on someone that didn’t share his skin color.

The two men wrestled on the ground, dust kicking up and clouding their air as more and more people filtered out from their tents to observe the spectacle. Jess could hear the moment T-dog’s fist collided with Merles face, a kind of sickening thud followed by a loud grunt and a roar as Merle launched himself up and ran at his assailant. Bowls and utensils flew through the air as they thundered through a nearby table and took out the peg of a tent in the process. The shelter sagged and Jess felt a stab of panic as they neared her. She stepped back in an attempt to put some space between her and the fight as Daryl shot out of nowhere and drove himself between them, taking a hard right hook from Merle that made Jess jump with the loud crack that it made. But Daryl simply emitted a loud grunt and shook it off and she suspected that this was far from the first time he’d been punched in the face.

“Back up! C’mon! Back up, Man!” He instructed, hovering in front of his brother with his hands on his chest. Shane arrived seconds later, just in time to catch T-Dog and pull his hands behind his back in true cop style. Jess raised an eyebrow.

So much drama. She thought.

“Leave it. Just leave it. What the hell is wrong with you?!” Daryl was now hissing at Merle, who was desperately trying to skirt around him. But wherever Merle was, Daryl was firmly in front of him. “Let it go, Merle.”

She bit her lip as she witnessed Daryl manage to de-escalate his brothers rage and she knew that no one else in the entire group would have been able to handle him in quite the same way. His leather vest flapped at his sides in response to him shifting all of his weight into his muscular arms in order to hold his brother still. With one leg placed in front of the other, he leaned forwards, a stable grip on each of Merle’s shoulders. Shane was busy dragging T-dog off and whispering in his ear when Glenn’s voice startled her, snapping her away from an image that had suddenly become a little easier to look at.

“You alright?” He asked. If he’d been there the entire time, she had no idea after having completely missed his presence. “Thought you might have gotten hit in your tent.”

“It just missed my head.” Jess replied with a small smile. “Just.”

“Lucky.”

“Yeah. Just glad I wasn’t up and sitting by the fire.” She expressed.

“You and me both. Those two have been gunning for one another for days now.” He told her.

She responded with a thin smile and turned her head back to where Daryl was now shoving Merle towards them. As they passed her tent, Daryl’s eyes managed to meet hers. He looked furious, unsettled. Uncomfortable. Taking it as her cue to make herself scarce, she climbed back into her tent.

It was almost a ritual now, everyone sat down to eat at the same time, like a giant, dysfunctional family. As far as altercations were concerned, everything was usually forgotten about in time for dinner, food being on the top of everyone’s list of priorities. It wasn’t surprising to Jess to see Merle and T-Dog sat in the same vicinity after such a violent fight, both of them seeming content enough with devouring their food than having any more fights. Merle had situated himself slightly further back than everyone else and made a few un-classy remarks under his breath that had so far been ignored by everyone. Jess heard every word but pretended she didn’t as she finished up her meal and made her way back to the cooking pot. Spooning the rest of the stew into a bowl, she dunked a plastic spoon into it and set off to find Daryl, who was the only one absent from the dinnertime ritual.

Sitting far away from the group, on a fallen tree on the edge of the woods, Daryl could hear both Jodie and Sarah making fun of Jess as she passed. Anger simmered in his chest and he grit his teeth at the sound of their incessant, immature and annoying giggling.

“Here”

Jess’s voice cut through his thoughts and he peered up at her with suspicion. He threw the piece of bark he was picking at on the floor in front of him and locked his gaze on her.

“You haven’t eaten. Your brother has. So, I took this before he noticed there was seconds.”

“Why?” He grunts.

She licked her lips and exhaled, her shoulders sagging.

“Saved us all from getting caught in the middle of a pretty nasty fight earlier.”

A grunt was all she received in response. Expecting him to react in any other way would have been futile, it was written all over his face that he was not in the mood to socialize.

“How’s your face?” She asked.

His right eye was beginning to swell and she knew that by morning it would be fully blackened. She wished she had a bag of frozen peas or an ice pack to offer, but figured it would only be met with a snappy remark or shrugged off anyway. But Jess wasn’t one to give up easily on something she believed in and in that moment, she believed that Daryl could use a distraction from his bad mood. Shoving away her doubts and shyness, she kept her eyes trained on him.

“Had worse.” He mumbled.

“You should eat, here.” She offered him the bowl again, telling him in no uncertain terms that she was not about to give up. After a small huff, he looked back up at her, slowly dropping his vision to the steaming bowl of food before eventually taking it from her.

“Thanks.” He grumbled, taking hold of the spoon and shoveling stew into his mouth without any regard for manners or decorum. Jess sat next to him and ripped up a handful of grass from the ground, gradually picking through the blades and discarding them in the breeze.

“Actually, it’s you that deserves the thanks. You hunted the food and then showed me how to skin it instead of just doing it yourself or showing me up in front of the others. So, thanks.”

“Ain’t nothin’.” He dismissed with his mouth full of food.

“Don’t think we’ve been properly introduced. I’m Jessica.” She told him.

Why didn’t I just say ‘Jess’? No one calls me Jessica. What am I doing?!

“Jess. You can call me Jess.” She corrected.

He turned his head, quickly scanning her from head to toe and swallowing the contents of his mouth.

“Daryl.” He stated.

“S’nice to meet you. I mean, as nice it can be, What, with corpses wandering around trying to eat us. That’s not exactly nice. But, there’s nothing like an apocalypse to bring out the best in people. But then again I guess some people are just crappy by nature.” She rambled.

He stared at her for a moment before shoving more food into his mouth. He was animalistic, almost feral somehow and he had an aura of unpredictability that made Jess nervous. Like a lion that appeared tame and calm but just below the surface lurked a danger that she didn’t want to see.

Jess was by all accounts, a self-declared introvert that didn’t actively seek out social interaction and felt the need to withdraw from situations or people that sapped her energy. Daryl was obviously not like everyone else and she would have hazarded a guess at him also being introverted, which meant that they possibly had something in common. It was unheard of that she made a marked effort to talk to someone that appeared so outwardly hostile, but the end of the world had brought with it a new found attitude in Jess; Just try it. See what happens. It was a philosophy that had kept her alive so far.

“It’s cold tonight, huh? I mean, I have enough blankets and stuff but it still gets through. It’s like ever since the world went to shit the nights have gotten colder” She expressed.

He finished up his food and dropped the bowl on the ground between his bent knees.

“Ya always talk this much?” He asked.

She wasn’t expecting such a question and didn’t know if she should be offended or amused.

“Uh… yes? No? I’m not sure.”

And she wasn’t. Not anymore. Now everything had changed and apparently so had she. If someone had told her she’d be sat beside a violent redneck and attempting to make nice during the apocalypse, she’d have laughed in their face.

Remaining at his side for half an hour more, she’d refused to move partly out of defiance. She braided grass into patterns and watched Carl and Sophia play at the side of the group while Daryl smoked and sulked, about what, she wasn’t sure. But he hadn’t got up and left, nor did he ask her to leave and she took that a small success.

Since she was a child, Jess always poured her deepest thoughts and feelings into a journal. Each entry left her feeling like she’d been cleansed and was ready for whatever the next day held. Sometimes, if she wasn’t in the mood to write huge paragraphs, she’d write, poetry, haiku’s or draw simple pictures in biro. Even with everything else destroyed and gone, Jess still made sure her journal was not neglected.

That night, in her tent. She opened up the thick, black leather-bound book and began writing.

'Daryl intrigues me. He has a brother that made himself known to me way before Daryl did. In fact, Merle leered at me as I walked by and told me I had ‘more cushin’ for the pushin’.” He’s vulgar and rude. I’m pretty sure he’s a raging racist too from what I’ve seen. I’m not sure Daryl is like that although there is a possibility. He just seems quieter, more thoughtful somehow. He’s kind of cute. In a dangerous kind of way. He broke up a fight between Merle and T-dog today. I have no shame in admitting I was impressed by his courage, even if he did get punched in the eye. I took him some food and tried to talk to him but he now just thinks I talk too much. I don’t think I said too much to him though, he’s just super quiet. Or did I? Oh god. I don’t know.

I’m not sure about everybody else. Rick seems like a nice guy; he’s checked in on me a few times. Shane too, although he’s a little… odd. I think there’s something going on between him and Rick’s wife. I keep catching them whispering to each other. But I shouldn’t make such assumptions. I could be very wrong. I like Carol, she’s the safest person to be around and I think I trust her, when she’s not with Ed. I don’t like him one, little bit. He’s a bad egg. I can tell. Rick’s kid, Carl is pretty cool. He sees a lot more than people give him credit for and he’s smart. He reminds me of me when I was his age.

I’m making an effort to stay away from Sarah and Jodie. They don’t like me and I don’t like them. My fat offends them. Good. I hope it makes their empty heads explode. It seems that no matter what happens in the world, those types of girls are everywhere. Like a disease or a bad smell that won’t go away. When they’re around, I just feel like I’m back in high school and I wouldn’t go back to high school if I was paid.

I could be in worse places. I could be dead. But I can’t shake this overwhelming urge to just be alone. I know it’s not safe and I know it’s not wise. I thought maybe if I talked to someone, tried to gain a friend, it’d help. So, I’m trying with Daryl. Out of everyone, I think he and I might be similar. What am I even talking about? The world ended and here I am, worrying about my social anxiety.

I should sleep. I rarely sleep more than a couple hours at a time now. I can’t stand the nightmares anymore.'

NEXT CHAPTER

#daryl dixon #daryl x oc #daryl fanfiction #twd fanfiction #twd

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tastelikesleepdeprivation · 6 years ago

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Domestic Human!Jack Headcanons featuring his three dads:

-Sam : no dessert after dinner, it will rot your teeth and we don’t have dental insurance because, legally, Dean and I are dead and Cas isn’t human so he can’t have insurance

-Cas: *sneaks Jack a cookie under the table during dinner, winks*

-Jack, with tears in his eyes, “thank,,”

Jack sneaking back into the bunker:

-Cas sitting in a chair and turns the lamp on: “where have you been?”

-Jack: “uhh with Dean”

-Dean, sitting in a chair next to Cas, turning on another lamp: “wanna try that again”

-Jack: “uhh with,, Sam?”

-Sam, in another chair next to Dean, turning on another lmap: “wanna try that AGAIN?”

-Jack likes it best when Dean cooks cause Cas can’t taste anything but “particles” so it’s always bland and Sam just can’t cook but Dean makes the best burgers Jack has ever tasted

-Jack sometimes has nightmares about Lucifer but if it’s a really bad one it’s about Dean, Cas, and Sam dying while Jack is standing by, unable to do anything cause he doesn’t have his powers and he wakes up panting and in a cold sweat with Cas right by his side because Cas doesn’t need sleep and will always be there to make sure to wake up Jack and comfort him during his night terrors

-Sam introduces Jack to books and tears up when Jack gets super excited about them because finally someone else who reads (not countering the literal one book Dean has read) and his favorite thing is sitting by Jacks bed side while reading The Wizard of Oz cause Sam told Jack all about their badass friend Charlie and her girlfriend Dorothy who saved all of them and Jack loves hearing about this apparently very real magical world

-Jack is actually really observant for his young age so when he sees Dean shuffling into the kitchen, scratching at his two week old beard with bags under his red rimmed eyes from fitful rest he announces a vacation day which Dean originally objects to but when Jack gets Cas and Sam on board he caves and so Dean hops in Baby with Sam to his right, Jack behind him and Cas behind Sam and they just drive. Dean puts on some classic Rock and Roll to “culture the kid right, Sammy” and they stop at some greasy diner and Dean laughs over his burger while Sam grumbles into his salad, Cas flashes his gummy smile and Jack hides his grin behind his drink and looks at his family and just living in the happiness he helped create and is a part of

-Dean got to be a father twice before technically but it never really felt like this. Never really felt like anything with Emma and while he got to be with Ben for a couple months it never felt permant, not like this, not like with Jack. So Dean cherishes every small moment he gets to teach and pass on something to Jack, whether it be through how to rile up Sam with a quick joke, or how to correctly wash and fold Cas’ trench coat, or do some work on Baby. Teach him something that doesn’t involve killing or hunting. Something normal, something a normal father would pass onto his son

-One of Jacks favorite occurrences between jobs is when Dean would cook all of them dinner and he would be wearing the apron Sam got for him as a joke (but secretly loves) and Dean would put on some music and would loudly sing along, shouting the lyrics while wildly waving the spatula in the air.

-Sometimes, Jack would pretend to be asleep when he would hear footsteps outside his door because he knew that Cas always comes and checks on him after he goes to bed. Cas carefully cracks open the door, and while Jack pretends to be asleep, Cas will put a gentle hand in his hair and place a chaste kiss on his forehead and Jack would wait until Cas pulls the door closed to smile into his covers

-Shopping with Sam was Jacks favorite. Sam usually did the shopping because Cas would forget the human stuff like tooth paste and toilet paper and Dean would buy pie instead of vegetables because he “forgot ‘em, sorry Sammy” so Sam always did the grocery shopping and would let Jack tag along, letting him get ONE candy (he always got nougat)

-Watching marathons with Dean is one of Jacks favorite passtimes because while Dean was a closeted chick flick watcher, Jack was an out and proud chick flick fanatic so both boys would sneak away for a night every so often when a new movie finally came out on Netflix

-One of Jacks favorite memories was when everyone went grocery shopping together when Jack was first turned human to find out what kind of foods he liked so he could have it available at the bunker, Dean grabbed the chips and junk food for him to try while Sam grabbed the fruits and vegetables, Cas gave his opinion now and then about what he rememberd from when he was human, especially his like of pb&js.

-Jack would go through bouts of insomnia to keep away the nightmares and this was the beginning of his midnight trips to the kitchen for snacks where he was joined sometimes by Sam but mostly Castiel which he preferred cause they would stay up late talking about the beginning of the universe and the thousands of years Cas has lived and what he has seen.

-When he turns One on May 18th, Dean, Sam, and Castiel decide to throw him a party, in their own way of course. Dean bakes the cake which is chocolate and has writing in icing on the top which says “baby’s first birthday” and they have streamers from toilet paper and first-aid gauze hung up all over the bunker. Sam gets him a new flannel so that he “can officially become part of the team” and a new book called The Great Gatsby which he can’t wait to start. Cas gets him a mixtape he made from all the songs he noticed Jack bobbing his head to when Dean would blast the radio. And Dean. Dean gets him a necklace. Not like the one Dean had, he told Jack all about the one Sam gave to him. But a necklace just for him that had the angels symbol for protection hand carved into the wood

-Sam is the first one to call Jack son to his face. Sam had just finished the last chapter of The Great Gatsby and Jack was crying because he thought that Gatsby didn’t deserve that kind of end to his life. Sam had closed the book, set it on the bedside table, wiped the tears from Jacks face, kissed him on the forehead and said “ it’s alright son, his story isn’t over, just moved to a new place”

-Cas first called him son on the night of one of Jacks worst night terrors. Jack heard screaming and woke up in a cold sweat to Cas at his side holding him close and whispering “I’m here, Jack, I’m here son, it was only a dream, I’m here” in his ear. Only until the screaming in his ears stopped did he realize it was coming from him and it wasn’t until he had fallen asleep on Cas’ shoulder from exhaustion and woken up the next morning to feel Cas still running his fingers through his hair did he notice that Cas called him son

-Sam and Cas had called Jack son early on and while Dean knew in his head and in his heart that Jack was his son he couldn’t say it to him. Experience and pain had taught him that once he said it, it would be real and so would the pain he will feel if, when, Jack gets hurt or killed. So he avoided it, calling him kid, kiddo, sport, and every other dumb nickname under the sun but still not that word until one hunt. It was supposed to be a normal job (famous last words, Winchester) until it went sideways and the werewolf got a claw into and up Jacks stomach. Only when Dean had shot the bastard in the chest until his gun was clicking empty did Dean fall to his knees next to Jack, holding his hands over the kids wound shouting at Sam to “hurry up and get the damn car!” Only when he looked at Jacks closed eyes and the shallow rise and fall of his chest and sees his pale face did he whisper for only Jacks ears “come on son, hold on. You gotta stay with me Jack, you gotta wake up son, you gotta wake up, you have to wake up”

-When Jacks hair starts curling around his ears does Sam decide to give him a haircut. Well, it was Sam at first until Dean grabbed the scissors and hip checked his brother out of the way saying “with your mane, I’m surprised you even noticed Jacks hair getting long. Move over, Sammy, I cut your hair for twelve years I’ll cut the kids hair”

-it’s Fourth of July and Dean insists on taking Jack to see the fireworks. One of Deans best memories is of him and Sammy shooting them off in some abandoned parking lot decades ago so he thought that he could give Jack a memory just as precious. Sam packs a picnic with some snacks and Castiel stuffs the impala with blankets. They drive out to the nearest town and set up shop in front of a closed grocery store across from the park where the towns show was set up to go off. Castiel hadn’t seen fireworks up close before so he was also excited. Jack was practically bouncing in his seat asking “ are they really made from fire?? How do they work??” And Sam and Dean would laugh and tell him they were really loud and colorful. When the fireworks officially started, Jack was terrified. It was so loud and he could feel the reverberations in his chest, they would come in no random order so he was suprised by the POPS. But after a while he was soon enraptured by the colors. Cas was just as enchanted by the way they would appear one moment and be gone the next. Jack and Cas loved the show so much they asked when the next one was and both were just as confused when Sam and Dean just laughed saying not until New Years

-Since they can’t exactly call a cleaning service to come and mop their underground bunker filled with weapons and proof of the supernatural, Sam established a chores list. Some chores depended on the day, like if Dean cooked he didn’t have to do the dishes but every person was given a chore, no matter what. Dean always grumbled but everyone knew he preferred a clean bunker. Cas would simply nod and go about his work, sometimes humming whilst doing so. Jack was just glad he had something to do that was of use to his family. And ironically, Sam was the one who forgot to do his chores most often

-whenever Jack manages to join the older three men on a hunt he always gets stuck in the back seat of the impala. Dean always drives, Sam always gets shotgun, Cas always sits behind Sam and Jack sits behind Dean. He doesn’t mind that much because on the truly long rides, the cross country rides, Cas lets him put his feet in his lap so he can lean against the door or sometimes he puts his head in Cas’ lap while Cas runs his fingers through his hair, falling asleep to the sound of the impalas engine rumbling, the quiet humming of the radio, and the muffled rapping of Deans thumbs on the steering wheel.

-Now that Jack is fully human, his body starts being fully human too which involves shaving. Sam pointed out his stubble first and offered to pick up razors and shaving cream next time he went to the store. Jacks first attempt at shaving began and ended quickly as he had no idea what to do, so he went to Cas. Cas,, tried. Being an angel and his vessel remaining the same he had no reason to shave (besides the one time after purgatory which still doesn’t make any sense) but he doesn’t know how to manually shave, just, angel shave. And that’s how Dean finds them later, in the bathroom both with their faces covered in shaving cream and staring at the razor like it would come alive and attack them. Dean chuckled but refrained from making a joke and helped to teach both boy and angel how to shave.

-Cas’ signature Pat of Reassurance is on Jacks shoulder. He’ll just hold his hand there on Jacks shoulder for a couple seconds longer than necessary, pat twice and then walk away. Sams signature Pat of Reassurance is on Jacks head or the back of his neck. Most of the time it’s a solid weight, a comforting weight but sometimes it will be a playful weight, a ‘you did something good and this is how I show it’ weight. Deans signature Pat of Reassurance is on Jacks back, right inbetween his shoulder blades. Most of the time it’s more of a slap than a pat but when it really counts, when Jack yearns for a physical sign of a reassurance, Dean always seems to know and just holds his hand steady

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shegoesbyarose · 6 years ago

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All I Ask

A/N: This is my take on Endgame Thor. Obviously, if you haven’t seen it, DO NOT read this. Really. You’ll spoil so much.

AGAIN, DO NOT READ IF YOU HAVEN’T SEEN ENDGAME!!!!!!!!!!!

Words: 3.5k

Weakly proofread

Pairing: Thor x Black!OC

Song Inspo: All I Ask by Adele

Warnings: Angst, PTSD, and other elements relating to mental health

TAGS: @kreolemami @letsshamelessqueen-m @marvelmaree @nina-sj @kpizzletrash

All I Ask

"How is he?"

Naomi stilled.

She hated that question. Absolutely loathed it. What was the reasoning for it? Really. She wanted to verbalize the mental question but decided against it and continued stirring the unblended coffee.

"How’s training?"

Sam sighed and leaned forward, elbows on the table. "I could ask you the same thing."

She rolled her eyes. "Don’t start."

"Naomi."

"I don’t want to argue with you, Sam."

"I don't want you to argue with me either. I just wanna have a discussion."

"A discussion that will, no doubt, end in an argument." She scoffed, bringing her coffee to her mouth before adding. "I can’t believe that you, of all people, are questioning why I’m doing this."

"Oh, I know the why. We all do. It’s the how."

She leaned back and narrowed her eyes. "What do you mean?"

The Avenger mimicked his baby sister’s motion and leaned forward, lowering his voice. "Helping me was one thing, Mimi-"

"Yeah, and I did it," she quickly countered. "Why is this any different?"

"Because the stakes are higher," he stressed. "We’re not talking about a Vet, sis. This is, hell, a god-"

"No," she shook her head. "This is a man in need of help. A man that I love and am not giving up on."

"No one says that you have to. We just want you to be careful. I want you to be careful."

She turned her head and chewed down on her lip. Sam meant well. She wouldn’t be sitting there if she thought otherwise. It’d always been in his nature to look after her. He was the stereotypical overprotective older brother who was still struggling to accept that his nearing 30 sister was no longer in need of his protection.

She was a grown woman, a former S.H.I.E.L.D agent who’d worked her way up to Level 7 clearance before the infamous collapse. She’d sparred with Natasha, fought alongside the same team her brother was a member of.

She was far from inexperienced from many things in life, and helping someone suffering from PTSD was no exception.

After all, she’d done it for him. When Sam returned from Afghanistan, he was a shell of himself. Haunted by the horrors of war and survivor’s guilt, nothing could have prepared Naomi for the blowback of the trauma her only sibling had faced.

Sleepless nights, episodes of screaming and nonsensical rambling, Sam was a far cry from the jokester she grew up with, but she fought with him, for him.

Every appointment, every therapeutic assignment, every counseling session, she was there every step of the way, determined to help him find his way back, and he did.

Few people knew about Sam’s darkest period, but Naomi did. All too well. She’d lived through it with him, and she’d been successful.

Just how she was going to be with-

"You should at least have some backup there with you-"

She impatiently tapped her natural nails against the wooden table. "Backup? I don't need backup, Sam. This isn't a mission, and I mean, Korg and Miek are there."

"What the hell are Rocky and Bullwinkle gonna do?"

"Sam!"

"Sorry." He lifted his hands. "I just want you to keep your options open."

"What options?"

"Have you thought about bringing somebody else in?"

"Somebody like who? No one else can get through to him like I can."

"Is that a hope or a fact?"

"What do you want from me? I can’t-" She turned her head and swallowed deeply. The sob in the back of her throat was desperately trying to push its way to the surface. "I won’t give up on him."

"I know you won’t," he sighed, his eyes filling with sadness. "But that doesn’t mean he hasn’t given up on himself."

••••

I understand Sam’s concern, and on one hand, I’m grateful. It’s nice having someone who cares. Or, rather, knowing that someone cares.

Naomi sighed, lifting her head and tapping the pen against the paper. The breeze swept past her body, splashing her curls against her face. The sound of seagulls and the gushing waves of the sea served as background noise for her journaling.

I know he still cares for me, that he loves me. I feel it. It's just, it’s hard for him to express it, and I don’t fault him. How can I? It may have only been a matter of minutes for me, but it was years for him. Five.

I’m trying to help him work through five years of marinated guilt and trauma, all of which he’s deeply suppressed and "treated" in a number of inappropriate ways.

"I’m going for a walk. Would you like to join me?" She already knew his answer, but that didn’t stop her from asking.

His eyes lit up for a second, and her hope lifted. Typically, he declined right away, but there was a brief second of contemplation, and she took it. Even the most minute signs of progress were worth acknowledging.

"No, that’s alright," he politely objected, chuckling awkwardly as he rubbed at his arm. "I-uh-should stick around in case the cable man shows up."

"Of course," she smiled softly, shrugging her cardigan over her tank. Naomi moved closer to him, taking note of how he swallowed as she placed her hand against his cheek, his untamed hair lightly scratching the inside of her palm. "Well, I won’t be long."

For a brief second, I thought about kissing him. I wanted to. God, I wanted to. It’s....hard. I crave intimacy, to be close to him, to be one with him again. Sleeping in separate rooms is hard enough. I suppose the intermittent distance between us should have helped, but there’s a difference between physical distance and emotional distance.

Everything happened so suddenly. One minute, she was in Wakanda, coming to consult with T’Challa, and the next, she was on a jet going to help rescue Wanda and Vision.

Naomi received a brief rundown from Nat. Something had attacked New York. Something not from Earth. Tony was unaccounted for, and Bruce, who’d been missing for years, called and said that they needed help.

Thanos, some extraterrestrial being, was apparently planning to attack earth. His endgame? To wipe out fifty percent of all living creatures. Obviously, there was no hesitation to suit up.

And then....the notification.

"Good to see you, Bruce," she shared, going for a hug when she felt him tense. "Everything alright?"

He looked down. "There’s-theres something I need to tell you. All of you."

She frowned. "What is it?"

He hesitated, causing Steve to speak up. "Banner?"

"It’s Thor."

Completely oblivious, Naomi’s eyes lit up. "Yes?" It’d been a few weeks since she’d spoken to him. He’s contacted her to inform her that Loki was apparently still alive and had banished Odin to earth, hence him being in New York. It was a brief conversation, but he’d promised to explain everything once he returned.

Except, he never did. However, it didn’t startle Naomi. She was used to him disappearing and coming back. It was just his thing. Hers too. Not many understood it, but they did, and that’s all that mattered.

"When Thanos attacked us-"

"Wait, you were with him? Thor?" Bruce reluctantly nodded as her frown deepened. "I don’t understand. Why isn’t he here then? You are."

"Heimdall, he-he helped me, well, the big guy, escape," he responded before adding on a quiet. "Before they killed him too."

She gasped. She’d met the gatekeeper a few times when Thor had taken her to his home, and each interaction was nothing but pleasant. Even more, she knew how close her boyfriend was to the kind man.

"It was bad, Naomi. We never saw it coming...he never saw it coming."

Her head snapped up. "Where is Thor, Bruce?" He looked down. "Bruce." She watched his eyes and his hand close.

"I’m sorry."

"No." She backed away, shaking her head. "No." As her back was toward everyone else and her normally acute awareness was nonexistent because of the growing ache in her chest, she jumped when Nat and Sam came on each side of her. "H-he’s not."

"We tried, Naomi. Thanos is just-he was too strong."

"Don’t tell me that," she croaked, hunching over as she placed one hand over her stomach, the other covering her mouth. "Oh, god."

Nat comfortingly squeezed her shoulder while Sam wrapped his arm around her waist, trying to console her.

I don’t like talking about those few days. Even with them being low in quantity, I’ve never experienced such heartache. Honestly, the only thing that kept me going was knowing that I had to finish what he started. I could not allow Thanos to win. This....this was personal.

And then, right when hope was all but gone, creatures clawing and attempting to ravage my battered body.

The kaleidoscope of colors, a flying ax, and.....restoration.

I almost didn’t recognize him. The haircut. Stormbreaker, the tree and raccoon on either side of him, but I knew. I just knew.

As the ground around us shook, I watched him shout his demand for Thanos, felt the intensity of the thunder, and gasped at the magnitude of his strength, his power, as he took down more enemies in a matter of seconds than we’d done in the near hour we’d been battling.

God, how I wanted to make my way through the fighting, to be in his warm embrace, but I knew that we had a job to finish. It could wait. At least, I tried to.

She’d impaled yet another creature and lifted her Wakandan staff to kill another when she was grabbed and lifted into the sky.

"What the hell, Sam!" She shouted at her brother, trying not to look down. She wasn’t a big fan of heights. "What are you-"

They lowered to the ground and he released her, Naomi almost stumbling from the drop when she heard-

"Noticed you’ve copied my beard."

Her head snapped up. "Thor."

How he heard her, she knew not, but when he turned around and their eyes met, her feet couldn’t carry her fast enough.

"You’re alive," she gasped, arms clasped around his neck as he held her up with one arm.

"You’re welcome!" Sam shouted, completely ignored by the couple, before flying back up.

He set her down on the ground, hand still on the small of her back. "I’m sor-" Before he could finish, she took her staff and hit him on the side of his armor. "What-"

"Don’t you ever scare me like that again!" She warned, hating that small smile on his face. "Do you have-"

Thor quickly pulled her into his side and lifted his ax, decapitating a monster.

"And what is th-why are your eyes two different-" she straightened her staff, killing the creature that was attempting to attack from behind. "I can’t deal with this right now."

When Naomi went to walk away, he easily grabbed her arm and pulled her back into him, stealing a kiss, all while lifting and lowering Stormbreaker to incinerate a squadron of outriders.

"I love you," he breathed as she carefully hid her smile at how he cupped her face with concern. "Be careful."

"Says the man walking around with an ax," she teased, forcing herself out of his grasp despite her desire to stay with him. "We’ll talk later."

"Is that what we call it now?"

"Hush," she laughed, walking away to join Nat and Okoye.

"Oh wait, love, this is a friend of mine, Tree!"

That was the last time I saw him. The next time we’d interact would be five years later, and nothing could have prepared me for what awaited.

It’s been difficult adjusting. When I was "snapped," it was 2018. I was in a serious relationship with a klutzy but lovable god while managing to stay under the radar because of my status as a wanted fugitive following the Sokovia Accords fallout.

Now, it’s 2023, and I no longer have to live in hiding, but my relationship...can I even still call it that? I’m not sure, but I will because while a lot has changed, my love has not.

My heart still beats for him. I lost my father. My mother. Now, my best friend, whose death I still haven’t truly accepted. I have Sam...and Thor. I’ve been given a second chance at life, a chance I will not take advantage of.

She’d just exited the shower, her plush towel wrapped around her nude, damp body, the silk wrap around her edges still secured around the perimeter of her head.

Walking over to the dresser, she started to dig around for a sports bra and biking shorts, her preferred sleeping attire.

"Dinner is almost-" Naomi turned around. Thor’s mismatched eyes started on her face but quickly trailed down her practically exposed figure.

The darkening of his irises sent tingles up her spine. She’d missed that, the hungry way he’d look at her right before throwing her on the nearest flat surface and making her scream his name until her throat was raw.

"I’m sorry-I should have-I’m so used to not having to," he nervously babbled, making his eyes look everywhere except at her. "Is the water hot? Perhaps I should take mine now."

"Perhaps I should have waited then."

Thor finally looked at her, Naomi naturally chewing on her bottom lip. She especially missed that.

He coughed awkwardly and tried to move back, accidentally knocking a picture frame over. "Yes, well, it, probably won’t be hot anymore-"

"I don’t think heat will be an issue." She was coming on strong, and it wasn’t intentional. Truly. But she’d been doing a hell of a job with acting as though she wasn’t craving intimacy. Not even sexual. Just laying in bed together, laughing, and discussing the most random of things, that closeness.

To be with someone and not be able to really be with them....it was brutal.

"I should-"

"Hey, uhh, Ms. Naomi," Korg yelled from downstairs. For some reason, he insisted on prefacing her name with a ‘ms’ despite her multiple attempts to get him to stop.

Walking over to the door, she purposely brushed her arm against Thor’s. "Yes?"

"Which one of heating boxes did you say we couldn’t put the foil aluminum in?"

She smiled and shook her head. "The small one, Korg."

"Cool. Thanks."

"You’re welcome," she shouted, angling her body so that she was leaning against the other side of the door, facing Thor. "What-"

"Naomi." The quietness in the way he said her voice caused her to straighten her shoulders. "You shouldn’t be here. This-this isn’t what you deserve."

"I’m where I want to be, Thor," she whispered. "With who I want to be with." A beat. "What about you? What about what you deserve?"

She had a feeling what his answer would be, but still, she wanted, needed to hear it. To see where his head was.

Starring at her, he replied with a low and solemn reply. "Not you."

Shaking her head, she stepped closer. Her hands went to his face. "You’re wrong," she murmured, eyes glazing over with unshed tears. "So, so wrong."

"Thor, I know that things are different. That time has not been kind to you, that it’s been much longer for you than it has for me, but I want, I need you to understand that I am just as madly in love with you now as I was then." She licked her lips, moving closer to him, her stomach fluttering when his right hand moved to her hip. "And I am here for you, okay? Whenever. Whatever. It doesn’t matter. You may not be human, but just like us mere midgardians, you had a breaking point, and that’s okay, Thor. We can get through it, together. I’m here for you. Always."

She saw it, the turmoil in his eyes. She felt the struggle between closing the gap between them or running away. His fingers flexed against the towel, unconsciously pulling on the material, dangerously close to causing the knot to become undone.

Naomi wanted with everything in her to rid them both of the turmoil, but she couldn’t. That would be selfish. This wasn’t about her or what she wanted. This was about him. She had to meet him where he was, and if he wasn’t ready, then he wasn’t ready. She couldn’t force it.

He closed his eyes. "Naomi, I-"

"Uhh, Ms. Naomi." Korg interrupted, clearly yelling from at the bottom of the steps.

Yet, she didn’t move, her eyes glued to Thor’s."Yes?"

"You wouldn’t happen to know where the fire extinguisher is, do you?"

Her mouth dropped. Didn’t she just...

"I should go help them," Thor cleared his throat, pulling away from her, the spy successfully hiding her pain at the separation. "I’ll-uh-yes." Without another word, he exited the room.

Sometimes, I do have moments where I wonder if I’m doing this for him or myself. I want to be with him. So, so, so much, and I just don’t want that to interfere with my desire to want to help him. I just have to wonder if I can do both.

It was late, the middle of the night when she felt someone over her. Sure enough, as soon as she opened her lids she saw Korg standing over her.

"Wh-"

"No."

Naomi instantly sat up as she heard his voice from down the hall.

"He’s doing it again," Korg informed as she kicked the blankets off and pushed the pillow away. The pillow that was a poor attempt at tricking her into thinking that she wasn’t sleeping alone.

"I’ve got it," she assured, not even bothering to slide on her slippers. "Go back to sleep."

Shuffling down the hall, she slowly pushed the cracked door open and allowed herself in. Sure enough, he was laying in the middle of the bed, twisting and turning.

"Loki, no."

Her stomach dropped. It was this nightmare again. No matter how many times Loki betrayed his brother, there was no doubt that Thor loved him, and seeing him be murdered was just another trauma on the list of heartache that consumed the Asgardian.

"Thor." Naomi moved closer to the bed, crawling on the side and lightly caressing his forehead. "Baby, it’s alright."

"I can save you," Thor murmured in his sleep, fisting the blankets.

"Thor," she raised her voice, moving one hand to his shoulder to try and shake him. "Baby-"

"NO!"

Years of intense training and countless near-death experiences taught Naomi the art of calmness, something that truly carried her at that moment.

In a matter of seconds, Thor was awake, his hand wrapped around her neck as he pinned her down, one hand outstretched as he summoned Stormbreaker.

Starring down at her, she watched him pant, his eyes blinking several times before his shoulders dropped. "Naomi…."

Instantly, he released her, Naomi naturally coughing from the deprivation of oxygen.

Thor stumbled back, falling off the bed, to which Naomi immediately responded.

"Hey," she whispered, still a bit hoarse but just as concerned not for herself, but for him. "It’s okay-"

"I’m sorry. I-I could have killed you," he spoke more to himself, and Naomi hated the absolute disgust she could plainly see he was feeling with his actions. "I didn’t-"

"I was a SHIELD agent for over ten years, Thor," she reminded, walking over to him and bending down as he threw his ax on the other side of the room. "Do you really think-" She stopped as his hand reached out to graze his fingers across her neck, no doubt searching for any signs of injury other than the bruising that was probably already somewhat visible.

"I hurt you." He swallowed, shaking his head. "I hurt my people. Everyone who is around me always ends up hurt." Her eyes watered from the increasing amount of emotion, vulnerability, and pain in his voice. "I-I am a destroyer."

"No, no, no." She shook her head, ignoring what her head was telling her and climbing onto his lap. "This," she placed her hand over his that was still on her neck. "This is nothing. An extraction mission, at best."

She pushed her lips together, cupping his face, her thumb caressing her cheeks. "You are hope, Thor. How many times, how many people, have you saved over the years? You went from being a selfish and arrogant asshole to one of the most selfless, kind, and caring people, hero, earth and every other planet out there has ever had the honor of being protected by."

She closed her eyes and sighed through a closed mouth. "It’s not your fault, Thor. Do you hear me? None of it. You can’t keep blaming yourself. I don’t. Steve doesn’t. Val doesn’t…and they wouldn’t."

She wiped away the tear that fell down his face and pressed her forehead against his. "You’ve lost more than any of us, and you’ve been strong for so long, but it’s okay to not always be strong. It’s okay to not always have the answers, or make the right decisions. Nobody is perfect, and no one expects you to be. You don’t owe anyone anything else, except to yourself. To heal. To grow. To forgive.”

Naomi released a shaky breath as he wrapped his arms around her, the boldest act of affection he’d extended her way since her return.

“Stay.” She looked down at him, the sincerity in his eyes. “Please.”

She wasn’t sure if he meant for the night, or in general, whatever the intention, her answer was still the same. She was with him to the end.

“Always."

#endgame spoilers #thor #thor x reader #thor x oc #thor odinson #avengers #thor fanficition #marvel #marvel fanfiction #thor x black!reader #thor x black!oc #loki #odin #norse mythology #mcu #thor fanfic #fic: all i ask

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sadboykookie · 5 years ago

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➺ “Seven boys, raised since birth into Seven Magi Masters, battle it out in order to obtain the ultimate prize—the Holy Grail, a magical artifact capable of granting its wielder any wish. Are they all still the boys they once knew?”

pairing: ot7 x oc’s genre: smut, angst, horror (?), abuse (?), thriller, fantasy, dystopia, action, historical!characters, based on the fgo series word count: 7.5 inspired by ⇢ fate series

chapter one/?

♕

It waIt was hot for a summer day, more scolding than usual.

The locus creaked. The far away stream flew with the fresh water from the nearby springs. The trees sang as the wind blew through their leaves, each green leaf shaking in the vast canopy above. The birds chirped wildly, chasing one another in a game of their own tag. The green turning grass stood still as if it were too hot to move, the only thing that remained still.

And here the young boy was, knowing that if he moved, he’d give himself away. Hiding behind a metal sheet that was leaned against his mother's prized greenhouse.

He really didn’t know how long he’s been there, he could feel the sunshine pouring into his bones by now. The only thing that saved him from being cooked alive was the dappled shade the sheet provided him, the book he was supposed to be reading for today's lesson later in the day was nested on his lap as he crouched waiting. Waiting to be found.

He wanted to read it while he hid to save the lecture his teacher would give him for not being caught up with the material, but he knew he needed to be on high alert. Whenever he did read, anyways, he was always caught up in dreamland with his books; medicinal ambiance for the young boy.

The sudden sound of light footsteps made him jolt, nearly hitting his head against the metal sheet - almost giving away his position. He tucked himself tighter into his chest, knees held tight across, and head in between. The young boy remained silent. Listening to the shouts across the field.

“Did you find him yet?”

“No! I thought you did!”

“I don’t even know why we play with him, he’s like the best hider.”

“Because it's only fair.”

“Then you go find him, smart ass!”

“Maybe he went inside already. He did say he has lessons today. His dad gets pretty angry if he doesn’t do them.”

“Don’t you have lessons?”

“Nope, I’m all caught up. I’m ahead of my class by two months. I’ve been told I’m currently the most advanced kid in the academy.”

“Not everyone’s dad is the head of the academy, chief.”

“Oh, yeah? Well, not everyone can read like-”

“Stop saying I can’t read! I just like looking at the pictures, okay?!”

“That just proves you can’t read yet!”

The young boy crackled softly to himself, knowing it was quiet enough to not be heard from how far away they were from him.

It waIt was hot for a summer day, more scolding than usual.

And here the young boy was, knowing that if he moved, he’d give himself away. Hiding behind a metal sheet that was leaned against his mother's prized greenhouse.

“Did you find him yet?”

“No! I thought you did!”

“I don’t even know why we play with him, he’s like the best hider.”

“Because it's only fair.”

“Then you go find him, smart ass!”

“Maybe he went inside already. He did say he has lessons today. His dad gets pretty angry if he doesn’t do them.”

“Don’t you have lessons?”

“Nope, I’m all caught up. I’m ahead of my class by two months. I’ve been told I’m currently the most advanced kid in the academy.”

“Not everyone’s dad is the head of the academy, chief.”

“Oh, yeah? Well, not everyone can read like-”

“Stop saying I can’t read! I just like looking at the pictures, okay?!”

“That just proves you can’t read yet!”

The young boy crackled softly to himself, knowing it was quiet enough to not be heard from how far away they were from him.

But to his misfortune, the young boy managed to give away his spot. The metal sheet started to shake, two small hands to either side lifting it up and away. The sudden sun glare caused the boy to squint his eyes, having trouble adjusting to the light after hiding in the dark for so long. He brought his hands up to help his eyes shade the harsh sunlight.

He heard the delighted gasp of the other as the metal sheet was moved away, “Ah! I found you! I guess you’re ‘it’ now, Yoongi!”

The young boy frowned, “The point is for you not too, Seokjin.”

The boy with the choppy haircut put his hands on his hips in triumph, his nose high in the air, “You may be the best hider, but I’m the best at seeking.”

Yoongi grumbled, picking up his book off the floor. Dusting the book off with the back of his hands before he dusted off his dirty knees and his bum. “No, you’re not. Namjoon is, that idiot needs glasses nowadays, so he sucks at playing. He’s as blind as my maid.”

“I take offense!” laughed Namjoon, making his way over to the two with the other four following behind him. “My mother hasn’t gotten the chance to take me yet. She keeps saying when dad gets back.”

“Oh,” teased chipped tooth Jimin, hands in his dirty overalls, “So, never?”

Jimin giggled as he hid behind Hoseok to avoid a swing from Namjoon. Namjoon quickly noticing the little object in Hoseok’s hand. “Where'd you find that?”

He was referring to the bird in Hoseok’s hand, a little blue jay that chirped wildly in his hands in discomfort. “It was on the floor, it looked hurt while I was hiding.”

“It looks hurt now,” narrowed Taehyung, arms crossed as he gazed over at Hoseok. His friend's eyes were lifeless like usual.

Hoseok just shrugged, mindlessly look at the animal struggle in his hand, “You’re right. Let me go let it go.”

With that, Hoseok walked off from the group. No one really questioning it, seeing how the boy would usually leave from time to time to be alone of his own without a word. No matter how many years they’ve known each other, Hoseok has just always been like that. Well, not always. He was a happy boy until his new step-father came into the picture years ago. Yoongi figured that was when he started to sink into his own despair.

“So, another game?” chirped Jin, beaming with excitement.

“If you’re gonna cheat again how about-“

“Young Master!” yelled Iris, Yoongi’s personal maid, from the house that was several meters away. “It’s time for your lessons! Other Young Masters! It’s time to go.”

Yoongi crinkled, lightly smacking his book against his thigh with a sigh. “I guess that’s the end of it.”

“We just started too,” pouted Taehyung, crossing his arms.

Jungkook kicked his heel, the older boy wincing, “We’ve been playing since this morning, it’s late noon now!”

“Too soon!”

“You guys are gross, get a room,” frowned Seokjin. Jungkook just ignored him, punching Taehyung on the shoulder for the heck of it.

“So, see you guys, next week?” asked Namjoon, hands in his pressed short pockets.

“Of course!” grinned Seokjin, already on his way towards the house. Both Jimin, Jungkook, and Taehyung in tow as they talked about what game they’d play next at the Min estate.

Namjoon smiled at his friends, shaking his head with a chuckle as he walked over towards the rest. Yoongi waited a bit for Hoseok, seeing the boy make his way over before he followed after Joon.

“Hey-” Yoongi stopped himself, noticing the damp bright maroon stains on Hoseok’s small hands before he tucked them into his deep short pockets. The even deader look of nothingness within his once bright eyes. He didn’t comment on it. Hoseok's frown deepening.

“H-hey! How’s the bird?”

Hoseok merely shrugged, “It flew off.” He was lying, Hoseok’s nose always twitches when he lied. Yoongi tried not to frown at the answer. “Where did everyone go?”

“Iris said everyone’s ride is here, and I got my lessons I have to attend to.”

Hoseok shrugged, tucking his hands deeper into his pocket as he passed Yoongi without a word. The demeanor that surrounded his closest friend made Yoongi shiver in his little shoes. Ever since his new step-dad came into place, Hoseok has been different, and Yoongi missed his best friend.

The two made it back home. The other boys already compiled by their maids or butlers that have come to pick them up, making conversation with one another. Hoseok already made pace though, his butler hurrying him into the car. The boys waved their goodbyes to their quiet friend, but Hoseok didn’t wave back. The two take off without saying goodbye to anyone else down the bricked country road.

One stood out from the rest though as his laughed ranged out loudly, Seokjin’s adoptive faster, a man named Leonardo Kim. Despite how the others always had help to come to pick them up and bring them home from a day of playing at the Min Estate every other week, Seokjin’s dad always came to get him.

A tall man of his Korean attributes, his hair frizzy in a nest, his black trench coat weathered as if it has a story to tell despite the hot summer, a small scar on his cheek dressed with a growing a beard, and a bright red gem he wore around his neck. So bright and vivid, you’d have to be blind to miss it. Jin was by his side, beaming up at his father with such admiration and love.

Yoongi understood that feeling, walking up to his own father. “Ah, Yoongi! Have you finished your reading?”

“I-”

“Sorry, Mr. Min,” interrupted the smaller boy. “I was distracting him. Taehyung and I thought it would be funny to hide his book to enjoy the sun. He was almost done though,” spoke Jin before Yoongi had the chance, noticing the panic in his quick eyes. “Sorry.”

“You rascal!” Leo drove his fist into Jin’s hair as he ruffled it, tough enough for him to whine, but not enough for it to actually hurt. “Why can’t you be a good student like Yoongi!”

“Dadddddd~”

Yoongi’s father laughed at the two, looking down at Yoongi with a sharp glare, causing the young boy to flinch in his step before his father looked up and smiled at the two. “You two are too funny, but it is getting late. I think everyone has left already.”

Yoongi hadn’t noticed, but everyone else did leave. Probably not wanting to interrupt his powerful father with any kind of troublesome goodbyes.

“Ah, I guess you’re right,” the tall man agreed, rubbing the back of his neck sheepishly. “You take care, Giotto. I’m always a call away, especially with what you know is... coming up.”

“Of course, Leo,” the elder man smiled, stepping into the hug he offered. Quickly pulling away. “I am too.”

“You study hard, Yoongi, got it?” he ruffled the young boy's black hair, Yoongi hands quickly shooting up to fix his messy hair. “You are the next Min to carry the lineage. I know you can do it, Mr. Strong Mage. I saw what you can do already. Jin can’t even move a leaf, and you’re over here making rocks explode with an incantation.”

“Thank you… Mister.”

Leo just smiled, patting on Jin’s back to say his own goodbyes.

“See you next week?” asked Jin, the missing front tooth he had made Yoongi giggle.

“See you next week.”

Yoongi shuffled in his bed under the sheets.

The young man waking in a near startle, jolting himself up right out of bed. His bed hair sticking up in every direction, a piece of scrap paper with scribbles of potion ingredients stuck to his cheek with his drool as glue, his dark circles deep from his lack of sleep over the past month. The ringing of his alarm on the phone started to annoy him as it grew louder and louder above him. The sun was already beaming through the curtains he forgot to close the night before, too hurried to jump into his bed. His eyebrows twitched in annoyance when the sound continued to ring and ring.

“Oh, shut up!” He shouted to no one in particular. Reaching up to shut off his clock with a hard press of his thumb.

It was only 7 in the morning and he groaned loudly at the time. He was up early this morning tinkering with potions downstairs. Only having slept three hours today. He wanted nothing more, but to sleep in. However, his eyes zoomed in on the day on his phone. It was Monday- fuck he forgot it was Monday, he didn’t think he was cooped up in the basement for that long since last Thursday, and he had classes on Monday at the nearby university. He only took morning classes because he wanted the rest of the day to finish his magecraft studies while pursuing his career in English studies.

Magecraft didn’t pay the bills, aspiring to become a novelist did, though.

He didn’t want to mooch off his families immense wealth. Being one of the strong Seven Noble families within the magical world, they were swimming in wealth to their ears. The wealth that accumulated from the proud and strong family of the Min throughout decades. He wanted to make a name for himself in both the Mage world and the normal one.

Yoongi didn’t know why he had that dream from such a long time ago.

He remembered there was never the next week after that fateful day.

Or a week after that, or a month, nor an even year.

Little did the seven of them know, that was the last time any of them would see each other was 15 years ago. Yoongi would ask were his friends went, or what happened to them, but his father insisted it was none of his concern and would just shove another book at him. Yoongi gave up asking after he finished the entire Encyclopedia Edition of Gems and Stones by Lord El-Melloi II - a read that took him two years to finish in between his regular 8 hour lessons days.

It hurt, seeing the friends he grew up with over the past 7 years from birth to just suddenly disappear like nothing. Like they never mattered.

Every birthday was bittersweet after that for the young Yoongi, he missed them all dearly. Namjoon would shove Jin’s face into the cake - his nose stuffed in frosting, Taehyung would bring the best gifts, Jimin somehow managed to set something on fire with the birthday candles, Jungkook would manage to finish the cake before anyone would get the chance too, and Hoseok would scream happy birthday to the top of his lungs to the point were Yoongi thought he went deaf in one ear drum. He didn’t ever want to admit it to them, but they weren’t just his friends, but they were his brothers.

The manner was quiet as usual as Yoongi made his way through the home. Decorated in a deep wood, green and gold, expensive furniture, and family heirlooms. It was quiet. It wasn’t like the country manner, something Yoongi preferred more. Something that had a life to it and felt like home. His family had an estate in town after his father died, making it closer to his mother’s family before she passed away as well. Leaving Yoongi and Iris, until Iris left to the retirement home several years ago. Yoongi now on his own.

He didn’t mind it though, he liked the quietness. He liked being able to do as he pleased without being worried about disturbing anyone with his loud explosions of potions being mixed unproportionate or pouring his magic circuits too harshly into his brightly colored gems.

Yoongi had a very basic routine every morning ever since he didn’t have his faithful maid to nag over his shoulder. Brush teeth, wash face, shit, look presentable, and leave. He bothered with whatever leftovers he had from the night before from cheap takeout or just go hungry in the morning until lunch.

“Oh, shit,” Yoongi remembered something as he swung on his backpack for his class. He walked upstairs into the attic where most of his father's possessions were kept since his passing.

Grabbing onto a heart-shaped amulet with a thin silver chain that was settled in a jewelry box on a dresser top he knew would be stored there after one too many drunken nights looking through his father's possessions. He stared at the bright jasper that was encased in rich gold swirls, clenching it tightly in his hand.

Knowing if he was to be participating in this up and coming Holy Grail War, he needed to be ready for anything. His father always told him this would be handy during the War, if only he had used it on himself.

Yoongi quickly made his way back downstairs, his now dyed blonde hair bouncing as he rushed out of the house after locking both the doors and the gate before he booked it onto the street. Seeing he had another thirty minutes to class before Miss. Matthews would make him sing “Little TeaPot” if he was late one more time.

The city he lived in he nearly deemed to be perfect, everything managed to be so close to each other; despite being the battleground for the next Holy Grail War. His house was no exception, despite a giant European styled home sticking out like a sore thumb in his plain neighborhood, it was in a walk of everything needed. Usually leaving his car at home since he didn’t want to risk another speeding ticket.

It was near spring, winter over two months ago. It wasn’t too cold, but Yoongi still wore a scarf. Tucking his chin deep into the green scarf his mother had made for him when he entered his first year of high school, the first year she was bedridden. He liked keeping the little gifts she made for him, even if Yoongi rarely saw her since she had given birth to him. The two never really had a relationship, anyway.

The powerful mage his mother was, she was always in and out visiting the White Order Academy; the school in which the richest, and most powerful mages attended. A story, in which, for another time.

The air outside was crisp. He could feel his ears redding. As Yoongi neared his walk, he noticed how bare the streets were. How silent it was for this little city, more than it usually was. No other soul was out walking, an occasional car would pass by once every thirty minutes. It was odd. It was too quiet.

Yoongi glanced at his watch. It was only 7:30 in the morning, it was early, but he would at least see someone on the street at this time. He wasn’t the only one in the world that had morning classes. Tucking his hands deeper into his pockets, he grumbled to himself. Wondering what was going on.

In a matter of minutes, he reached the campus. It was empty when he arrived, making way towards his first class; in the English hall. His eyes perked up at a familiar figure starting to run his way, the tall friend of his with the elf-like ears and the muscular body.

“Oh, hey,” greeted Yoongi, taking his hand out of his pocket to wave at his college friend.

The tall man grinned back, however out of breath from his morning run. He slowed down a bit, stopping a few feet from Yoongi as he stopped to catch a breath; hands on his knees as he bent over to catch in deep breaths.

“God, I said ‘good morning’. Not suck my dick,” frowned Yoongi, tucking his hands back into the warmth of his jacket.

The taller man laughed wholeheartedly, hands on his hips as he smiled. “I just ran five miles straight this morning. What have you done today either then be a grumpy bitch?”

“And?” narrowed Yoongi. “You act like this is new information.”

The tall man laughed again. Finally settling down his breaths for oxygen. Yoongi cringed at his apparel, wondering how his balls weren’t shriveled up with his basketball shorts and t-shirt. “Yeah, yeah, whatever. You are a bit early today, Yoons. It’s like-,” he stopped to look at his watch, “It’s like 6:30. Don’t you have an 8 o’clock?”

Yoongi groaned loudly, wanting to drive his head into the nearest wall. “Chanyeol! You’ve got to be shitting me!”

“No, Sir, that would be totally gross.”

Park Chanyeol was the captain of the school's track team, at the university due to the scholarship it offered. He only met Yoongi, who once fell asleep on the field one day and almost got trumped by his team one early morning. The two were acquainted friends ever since Chanyeol awoke him with a poked stick to the cheek.

Yoongi groaned. Burying his face into his hands to sigh deeply. So, that's what it was. The reason why there wasn’t a single soul in sight this morning, its because who else in their right mind would be awake this early. “Wow, that’s so fucking annoying. The clocks at my house somehow reset an hour fast today. Like every clock, all the phones, and wall clocks. Exactly by an hour.”

Chanyeol nodded in agreement, “That is a little strange. Maybe Sehun broke in? Dicked around and played with your clocks? He did say he needed a hobby.”

Yoongi shrugged, “Maybe.”

He knew that wasn’t the case. The incantation spells placed around the house at every entrance would automatically wake him up if someone dared entered without his permission, seeing how they’d be met with an explosion to the face if they did try. Yoongi didn’t try to dwell on it, seeing how it wasn’t something too out of the ordinary for his odd house.

“Well, whatever. Are you on your way back home? Can I nap for a bit until my class?” he asked, seeing how Chanyeol lived on campus and his dorm was a mere five-minute walk away.

“Yeah, I don’t mind. It’s a bit messy though,” he admitted, rubbing the back of his neck.

“I slept on Sehun’s bed the other day after a study session and kicked a used condom. It was still damp. I think you’re fine.”

And with that, Chanyeol laughed deeply again.

♕

Yoongi hated his art class.

Well, more like his art appreciation class. In which, they just sat and listened to a fat old man go on and on about pieces of random google clips and ask the students about how it made them feel. Demanding a ten-page paper about thirty different emotions Yoongi didn’t think was fathomable. He didn’t want to take it, he just needed it for the credits and attendance.

Good thing he sat towards the back, usually bringing a spell book to freshen up on as the two-hour class dragged on. Only had it three times a week, he praised the Lords for that, at least.

Memories of Yoongi’s drunken adventures flooded his mind from the other night, toying with the little amulet in his jacket pocket between his fingers. It was sealed inside a memento his father had left behind for him, finding it deep within his father's belongings with a note addressed to his only child. Saying it was something that would be useful in the future, sealed inside an annoying puzzle box it took him hours to solve. Usually, a sober Yoongi would have no issue, but being a little bit intoxicated proved its worth.

When he finally got the box open, he was greeted by a note from his father, the bright pendant, several trinkets, and a fossilized snake skin that was encased in a red cushion inside a smaller glass box. If Yoongi remembered correctly, that’s when all the clocks within the home went crazy when he touched the encased box. He probably didn’t remember until know because he blacked out right after he got it to open.

Yoongi leaned back into his seat and sighed to himself.

He knew what kind of bloodbath the Holy Grail War was. How it wasn’t for the faint of heart. He remembered what it did to his city fifteen years ago, engulfing the city in flames on a bloody battlefield. Some unfortunate to escape the War - the Mages’ Association using bomb explosions as a coverup, having hundreds perished in the fires. His own father included.

The sacrifices it made people do, the things it made the kindest people do in order to obtain its power. To get one sole wish it granted, no matter the cost to get it. Yoongi didn’t really mind the wishing part. He didn’t have a wish, at the moment, that needed granting. If he did anyway, he didn’t need some magical catalyst to do things for him, he had his own two hands to get whatever he needed to be accomplished.

He was only participating in this up and coming Grail War because it was his duty as the sole Head of the Min family. It was his duty to do it next, after his father's failed attempt. It was his father's last will for his only child to do what he could not.

Even if he didn’t want too, Yoongi’s other option was to take shelter with the Mage’s Association. Seeing how his family was one of the Seven Nobles, his magical circuits were immense compared to regular Mage’s having collected them over the decades since near time. A Master of the war could easily murder Yoongi for his powerful magical circuits in order to use them for their own accord, and Yoongi wasn’t one to lay down easily without a fight.

Yoongi jolted in his seat when the professor yelled at the class had ended and a sharp text from his phone in his pocket, the girl next to him shooting him a glare during his sudden startle. All he did was shoot one back.

Yoongi collected his books, shoving them into his bag and swinging them over his shoulder. He glanced down at his phone, frown deepening when he saw the message.

3:45 PM

Try tonight. It’s your last chance to participate since the deadline is tomorrow, Yoongi. There is only room for two masters left.

- Suho

Suho, otherwise known as Kim Junmyeon, Head of the Vatican or also called the Church. A lifelong friend of his father, tasked with keeping in touch and making sure Yoongi is going down the correct path in his father's absence. Yoongi knew that was a lie though, he’s seen the way his father would look at Suho whenever he came to visit when Yoongi was a child.

His father always looked at Seokjin’s father with such a kindness and admiration, but with Suho around, it always seemed like he was stepping on the glass around the man. Careful of both words and his actions. The other man didn’t seem to mind though, he’d just meet with Yoongi’s father when he needed and be out of the house in a matter of minutes. It came to a shock towards Yoongi when the man arrived at his doorstep one day after his mother's passing, claiming he is now Yoongi’s legal guardian. Despite Yoongi over the legal age.

Yoongi sighed. He wasn’t doing anything tonight, anyways.

Little did Yoongi know when he began to walk his way out of the empty classroom, a bright red mark on his left hand flashed as quickly as it disappeared.

♕

The man coughed harshly as the desk he shoved against the further wall to make room erupted in a gas of dust. Papers older than his grandmother were scattered all over the floor, mountains of books that have seen the dawn of time itself; the downstairs was cluttered in cobwebs and god knows what else. It was the only place in the house Yoongi couldn’t add risk to injury with if his summonings didn’t go to plan.

He sighed in delight at his handy work on the floor. A large magic circle is drawn in with white chalk dressed on the floor. It’s scriptures and designs from a different world. Luckily, Yoongi was always utterly confident with his magical circles, they were always an exact replica from the books; photographically embedded in his mind like most of his reading were.

Dusting his hands off, he looked at the clock on the table next to him. It was nearly midnight, the time of day were his mana was always at its peak. His wavelength was on par, his catalyst was placed in the middle of the circle, the dusted snakeskin - it would be as better time than any.

The note his father had left behind wasn’t pacific on what kind of Servant the catalyst would summon. He hoped it was a Saber, though, the strongest class to obtain. It was his guaranteed win if he managed a Saber servant with his own magical caliber. He knew the game was as easy as taking candy from a baby.

Yoongi took a deep sigh, closing his eyes on the inhale. Clearing his mind to chase away any kinds of anxiety. As he exhaled, he opened them. He grabbed the materials on the table next to him. Remembering the instructions Suho gave him in order to perform the ritual.

And so, Yoongi began.

“For the element, silver, and iron. For the foundation, stone and the Archduke of Pacts,” he began, dropping each liquid into the drawn circle below. The clock next to him froze. The liquid dripped, hitting the chalk, and the circle itself began glowing a bright white, “And for the ancestor, my great master, Jaesun. Close the gates of the four directions. Come forth from the Crown and follow the forked road leading to thy Kingdom. Fill, fill, fill, fill, fill.”

The circle started to brazen and turned into bright green light as the liquid from his hand continued to drop, the light shining vividly, “Heed my words. My will creates your body, and your sword creates my destiny. If you heed the Grail’s call and obey my will and reason, then answer me!”

The air started to flow around the young Mage as the papers around him began to flow and his clothes started to rustle as the ambiance flew, his eyes now closed in concentration. Yoongi was too into the spell that he didn’t notice his right hand begin to burn with a red seal, “I hereby swear, that I shall be all the good in the world. That I shall defeat all evil in the world. Thou Seventh Heaven, clad in the three great words of power, come forth from the circle of binding, Guardian of the Scales!”

A small burst of air around the circle escaped, disappearing throughout the room. Nearly knocking Yoongi out off his toes, and sending the loose scraps of paper into a frenzy. The glow of the circle disappeared with the wind that disbursed it. The clock next to Yoongi started clicking again, and that's when he dropped to his knees. Out of breath and exhausted, not really expecting the summoning to take that much of his mana from him. He felt his head drum loudly, his stomach felt empty and he nearly wanted to vomit.

As he caught his breath, he saw the red engraved seal symbol on his right hand - deeming the summoning was a success. He glanced around the room, looking both left and right. Well, if he was so successful, where the fuck was his servant-

The floor above him shook harshly, enough for some dust to shake down and pieces of rubble to hit Yoongi on the forehead. “What the fuck-”

He got up, quickly making a dash to the sudden noise despite stumbling against every piece of furniture near him as the ritual made his mana drain; his legs shaking as he raced up the steps.

The basement door led into the family room, dust filling the air from the pieces of broken furniture and god knows what else. The light fixture that was once lighting up the room was swinging wildly from the sudden force, Yoongi’s eyes having a hard time adjusting to the lighting as it shook, but he didn’t need lights to see those.

Those pair of blood red eyes gazing solely at him, he felt them glare into his soul - like he was a mere window.

And as the light adjusted still, Yoongi saw her.

A woman, she looked around his age. She was sitting cross-legged on the couch with her long legs crossed, she looked tall compared to Yoongi. Her hair was like gold silk, long to her waist as it draped around the furniture around her. Bangs cut to frame her angelic face and piercing red eyes that shone brightly every time the light swung. Striking as they bore into Yoongi as if she dared him to make the next move, that would be his absolute end.

Her skin was fair, her red tattoos that adorned her body in lines were in strike contrast. She wore a black top, as if a bikini, that covered her chest, black tights that came up from her thigh, golden armor that was engraved in scripture around her waist that was encased with a red cape to match her tattoos, and golden boots that came up to her knees. The woman was adorned in gold, from her earrings, thick necklaces, dangling bracelets, and sole golden piece of armor that was on her left arm all the way to her hand; pointed sharply with her nails, decorated in scriptures and patterns.

Yoongi had to admit. This woman was not of this world. She was beyond godly. She was a god amongst men. Yoongi felt himself in a trace from merely looking.

“Stop staring at me, Mongrel,” hissed the woman with venom laced in her honey-smooth voice, “You’ll dry at your eyeballs.”

Yoongi snapped himself out of it from her harsh words, he cleared his throat, trying to keep his cool as he leaned against a nearby wall, “That’s not a way to greet your Master.” The woman just narrowed her eyes, “So, are you cleaning up this mess or-?”

The woman clicked her tongue in disgust, “Is that what you say to me? You must have some nerve, human.”

“You haven’t answered my question, lady.”

“Addressing me as a mere lady as well?” her eyes narrowed deeper, “The disrespect.”

“Well, whatever, I can fix it with a spell later,” Yoongi sighed deeply, leaning off the wall and walked towards the woman. He stuck out his hand, towards her, “My name is Min Yoongi, head of the Min family. I assume you are my Servant.”

She raised her eyebrows with a quim, staring at his hand, “I could kill you. I could be someone else's' Servant for all you know.”

“And if you were,” countered Yoongi, with a smirk, “You would have done it already.”

The woman took a moment to process, letting out a small pleased hum of approval. “I see. I would’ve killed you long before we’ve continued this silly conversation.”

“So, are you going to shake my hand or not? Because it’s getting limp,” Yoongi hoped she didn’t see his hand began to shake.

She did notice the red mark on his hand, causing her brow to rise again, “I guess you are my Master, so it seems.”

Yoongi took his hand back, “You make it sound like it’s a bad thing.”

“I have been summoned within a drab home with cheap furniture. I expected a throne, for someone as myself,” she looked down at herself, frowning when she saw her breast, “And you summoned me incompletely. This is not my true form, Mongrel.”

“Incompletely? What on Earth-”

Yoongi’s eyes shot up to the clock behind her. It read midnight. Yoongi felt skeptical, looking at his phone in his back pocket, which read 11PM. Fuck. He forgot to correct the clocks from this morning. He forgot that it wasn’t really midnight, his peak mana time. The time were his magical circuits were at its peak. The ideal time to summon a Servant. Of course, something had to go wrong. Of course, there is never smooth sailing for Min fucking Yoongi. Fuck, he fucked up.

Yoongi groaned deeply into his hands once again.

It really wasn’t his day.

Yoongi sighed, rubbing his eyes. He’s usually passed out around four, but fuck, he felt exhausted to the bones already. “So, is that going to be an issue?”

The woman shrugged, looking at her nails. “No. I am highly capable in both forms, even if not in my original, I am still beyond emaculant.”

The woman stood up from her spot, arms still crossed against her chest. Yoongi had to look down at her, she was smaller than he thought, but the way she carried herself spoke volumes. “I want to see if you are someone who is worthy of my loyalty, Mongrel.”

“And are you saying I’m not good enough to be your Master, little miss?” he narrowed, eyes squinting at her.

The woman said nothing, taking two graceful steps towards him. Her armor clinking together as she moved. She rested a hand on her hip, and Yoongi noticed her eyes did seem to shine better under the light. “I am utterly unsatisfied, seeing how you summoned me incorrectly. However, with much misfortune, I do acknowledge you as my Master, human. I plan on winning this War, having a mage of your caliber does not matter to me.”

“I have my own conditions, regardless of whatever you want,” she continued, Yoongi not stepping down from her as he stood his ground, “I will disregard anything you say during this War to come. I am to decide all battle policy, and I see you have no objections towards my conditions, do you, Mongrel?”

Yoongi stuck his tongue in his cheek, trying to ignore the way her long eyelashes touched the tops of her cheeks. He clucked his tongue in annoyance, crossing his arms against his chest. Ever since she’s been here, the woman has done nothing, but ridicule Yoongi, and he doesn’t even know her name!

Yoongi was always the better one out of his rich and spoiled friends, treating everyone like equals despite rank or hierarchy, but one thing that would tick his annoyance would be anyone that looked down on others. No matter how high they thought they were.

“Let me get this straight, little missy.”

“Little miss-”

Yoongi cut her off, taking a large step closer to her. Nearly chest to chest. Her lips were tight in a thin line, clearly annoyed. “You solemnly acknowledge me as your Master, and yet, you treat me like dirt since you’ve been here. Why is that, little miss?”

“I am your Servant in form only, Mongrel,” she hissed through her perfectly pressed teeth, “I will obey you in form only. I will call my own when it comes to battle and you shall not interfere. I do not need another lowly Mage killing you and getting me out early. You better run early with your tail between your legs and go hide in your basement. Someone as powerless as you should be capable of hiding in the dark, shouldn’t you?”

She noticed the way Yoongi’s jaw tightened when he stood quiet for a few seconds, eyes boring straight at her, “Have I made you angry, Mongrel? My victory is your victory, and I will yield any spoils of battle to you. Surely, in anyone’s right mind, that would be agreeable? I do not expect-”

She stopped, flinching when Yoongi suddenly brought up a hand. Unexpectedly, tucking a piece of her golden hair behind her ear. Cupping her cheek in his hand, and if looks could kill, Yoongi would be dead on the floor. “You think you can touch me-”

“You see,” he began, his voice low and a smile teasing, “You think, you a Servant. Can some here and disrespect me, your Master? This is going to be a joint effort, sweetheart. I don’t care how mighty and high you think you are, or who you were. That’s not going to fly with me, I frankly don’t give a shit. Here in this Grail War, we are equals, and we are partners. We are winning this War together, on both parts as Master and Servant. You are not running away to do as you please like some teenager, and to make sure you don’t-”

Her eyes widened, watching Yoongi lift his right hand, the hand engraved with his three Command Seals. “You wouldn’t-!”

“By the order of this Command Seal, I hereby order you to absolute obedience towards your Master.” With that, Yoongi’s hand showed bright red. A red ring appearing around his hand as it expanded, the woman backing up, but got caught into it. She hissed as the red light vividly shocked her, making her to grit her teeth and clenched her fists tightly to her sides. And just as soon as the ring appeared, it disappeared. Along with one of Yoongi’s three Command Seals.

“Are you that daft, human!?” she shouted. “To waste a Command Seal with so broad of an order!? Clearly, your mother had dropped you several times!”

“Actually,” he said matter-of-factly, “I was raised by my maid and she only dropped me once.”

Yoongi crossed his arms against his chest, his tone deepening as he peered down at her, “I am your Master and you are my Servant. We are in a coexisting relationship until we win this War. You will have your wish, and I will have mine. After that, we will never see one another ever again, and in order to win, I need your absolute obedience. No matter how much you don’t think I am capable, I am your only shot at winning. So unless you want to turn it in early, I can tuck away my pride and give you to the Vatican. However, I assure you, they will terminate you to take your remaining seals for their own.”

“So, how about it, little miss?” Yoongi smirked when she remained quiet, “Do you want to win or not?”

The woman stood silent, absolutely baffled. Never in her mortal or her immortal life has anyone ever spoken to her like this, God nor human has dared. She stood her ground, though. Nothing did even phase her so much anyhow, “I see. I will prove that you wasted that Command Seal, human.”

Yoongi offered his hand out towards her, waiting for the woman to take it. “Truce?”

She tightened her lips again, nose high in the air as she looked him deep into his eyes. Taking his hand quickly into her own small with her armored arm. Dropping it as soon as she took it. “This will be one of the few times I will allow you to touch me, Mongrel. As long as you are alive, I will fight for you. And if you happen to die, I will not hesitate to make another pact with another mage. I will win this War.”

“See? How hard is it to be nice?”

The woman scoffed, flipping her long hair as she sat back down into the spot she was summoned. “The only reason why I’m not torturing you nor killing you is because even if the Holy Grail is the one that truly summons me, your mana is what anchors me to this world. Your mana feed is more than satisfactory, and I don’t want to waste it on finding a new mage to please me. I guess you are indeed a first-rate mage, you did summon me after all.”

Yoongi didn’t want to blush, but he felt it creep onto his ears. Causing him to turn quickly to hide it, covering his face with his hand. “Too late for flattery, you were a total bitch to me for the last two hours.”

“You’re confusing that with power, Mongrel. I am too much of a woman for you to handle. If I were in my male form, you surely would be bowing to me, by now,” she shrugged as if it were rocket science.

“Yeah, yeah, whatever, sassy missy,” Yoongi just waved her off, facing her as he turned back to her. He gasped when he narrowed down at her, “Wait. What class are you, anyway? A Berserker? Your armor and attitude fit the bill.”

She scoffed yet again, “Hate to displease you, human, but I am no lowly Berserker.”

“Then what are you? You have no Noble Phantasms visible. Who are you?”

She remained quiet for a bit, tapping her uncovered finger against her armored hand. “I am an Archer, that I do know, and you shall refer to me as so. Though, due to your incomplete summons, I do not know who I am. It will come to me with time, I’m sure.”

“You’re kidding me!” groaned Yoongi, sighing out deeply. “I wasted all those gems and I didn’t even get a Saber! I got an Archer who doesn’t even know her own fucking name! I wanted to win with ease, not struggle in the mud-” Yoongi just massaged his temples, “but alas, it’s my fault for not double checking the time.”

“I’ll make you rue your words, Mongrel,” Archer hissed, narrowing her eyes at him, “And when that day comes when we win, apologize all you’d like, but I won’t forgive you.”

Yoongi took in her words. Smiling fondly to himself as he approached her. He stood a foot away from her, Archer doing nothing, but look at him with those red eyes of hers.

“See to it that I regret my words, then, Archer,” he bent over, patting the woman fondly on the head like she was an angry cat that needed soothing. She was too utterly baffled that she couldn’t smack his hand away, too caught up with him touching her again. The nerve he’s shown. He pulled his hand away, still smiling down at her. “And when you do, and when we both win, I’ll make you let me apologize for saying the wiser.”

Archer remained quiet, staring at him in mild shock until a smirk spread across her perfect lips. “I see then. You better hold your words to your grave, Mongrel.”

“Of course, I am your Master, after all.”

“Go to hell.”

“Oh, look what I have here. I have two Command Seals left, I wonder how I should-”

“They’re not toys, you know!”

♕

hopefully, this wasn’t too bad. stayed tuned for more!

#bts fanfic #bts smut #bts fanfction #ot7 #ot7 x reader #ot7 x you #bts x you #ot7 drabble #ot7 reactions #thisisus #sadboykookie

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a-shiro-by-any-other-name · 6 years ago

Text

Welcome Back (Shiro x F!Reader) N$FW

Hi guys! Here's a little something I've been working on for a long time that I forced myself to finish by Shiro's birthday. Happy birthday to everyone's favorite sexy space dad! ;3

I hope someone out there enjoys it.

(The under the cut function on mobile is fuckin up and I cant fix it atm. My apologies)

To read on Ao3 under my main account CapsuleCorpDame:

https: //archiveofourown.org/works/17957087

Shiro had finally returned to the Castle of Lions after disappearing. Relieved from the constant anxiety you felt in his absence, your emotions got the better of you. But before you could cover up your true feelings, he confessed his love to you. Later in the night he noticed you were wearing his shirt to sleep.

“You can have it back if you want it.”

“No- no, you can keep it. It looks good on you.” He smirked.

“Are you sure?” You grabbed the bottom hem of your shirt with crossed arms about to lift it up past your shoulders. Slack-jawed and beet red he stared down at where your hands were.

“W-well….when you put it that way…”

“Y/N” Shiro stood there before you with his freshly cut hair and clean-shaven face. The day before, he had emerged from the shuttle with straggly long hair, a thin beard forming from his jaw. His haircut made him look more youthful than the undercut he had before. He was cleaner now, but you could still see the dark circles under his eyes. Of course you had been worried about him since he disappeared. The others were upset too but it showed on you and Keith the most. As stubborn as Keith was he didn’t want to talk much about it, and you didn’t want to burden anyone else with your pain; but it did show.

Upon his arrival you caught a glimpse of his disheveled face and ran off to your room to cry. To you it was irrational. You were happy he was back but who were you to him really? To sob in front of everyone was too embarrassing. You decided to wait for him to approach you first which didn’t take very long.

Looking up at him you were speechless. You knew you looked like absolute hell and chose to bury your face in his chest, arms squeezing his waist tightly. Your breath hiccupped as the tears made their way onto his shirt.

“What- happened to you…?” It finally came out. He ran his fingers through your hair as you trembled against him, digging your nails into his sides, in an attempt to stable yourself.

“I only remember escaping from a Galra ship on an escape pod. I have no memory of anything before that…” His other hand wrapped around your back. You grip on him loosened and you turned your head to press your forehead against his chest. A deep breath helped you compose yourself.

“I’m so glad you’re back.” You tried to smile at him knowing that your feelings for him were probably very apparent.

“I wanted to talk to you about something… do you mind if we take this to my room?”

Your heart skipped a beat. His room? Was its really that personal and private? Maybe he wanted to confront you about your feelings and didn’t want to embarrass you out in the open. You let go of his waist and nodded in acceptance. The two of you walked side by side in silence down the hallway. Shiro looked around when you approached his bedroom door, assuming it was to make sure no one was around to see. The door slid open and he ushered you in. It was amazing how immaculate his room was after all this time, the man sure was disciplined. He sat down at the edge of his perfectly-made bed and patted the spot next to him to signal you over. You tried to sit more comfortably than you felt but kept a small distance between you as to not seem so clingy.

“I’ve had a lot of time to think since I’ve been trying to get back to the castle…I had been trying to avoid talking about this for a while now until I saw how upset you just were.”

Involuntarily you gulped but tried to hold eye contact. Gears were turning in your head to try and find any words to stop him from finishing.

“I don’t want to hide it anymore. The gravity of our situation kept me from acting out on it but now I grasp that we could die at any time out here…”

What was he talking about? You suddenly realized this wasn’t about what you thought. “I’ve had feelings for you for some time now…and I don’t expect you to reciprocate them, but I wanted to tell you so that maybe we could move forward.”

“…What?” your mouth wouldn’t close. Did he just confess that he likes me?

“I- I don’t mean we have to have a romantic relationship! I just meant that if you didn’t feel the same that we could look past this and pretend it never happened!”

“I don’t understand… I’m a potato. Why would you want to be with a potato?”

He looked more confused than you. “A…potato? Why would you compare yourself to a potato? You don’t look anything like a potato, unless it’s because they’re delicious?”

You snort laughed at his response and covered your mouth, smashing your forehead into his shoulder. God he was so cute. You threw your arms around him in an embrace. “I don’t think I’ll ever comprehend why you like me, but I thought it was obvious that I liked you…”

He held you back tightly, pressing his nose to your temple. “I knew you cared for me, but I didn’t want to assume it was more than friendship. I really missed you… I was afraid I’d never get to tell you how I felt.” His breath tickled your ear as he spoke.

“I always felt like I was just annoying you!” you practically shouted into his neck.

“I don’t think you’re annoying, I think you’re fun!” He pressed a kiss to your cheek and your face immediately became hot. “Does this mean…you want to give us a shot?” He pulled back to look at your face. He too had a blush on his cheeks under his scar. Agreeing that time was too short, you began to close your eyes and lean in to him. The tips of your noses slid past each other abruptly bringing your lips together sloppily. You could feel how smooth his lips were when you brushed by them. It took a second to reform your lips for a proper kiss, aiming to place your lips around his bottom one. You had dreamt of this moment for so long the feeling was overwhelming. He initiated the second kiss gliding his hand from your hair across your jaw cradling your face. Outside the door you heard a small stampede passing by, a certain blue paladin shouting: “Dinner!” as if it were miracle.

“Maybe we should…” Shiro pulled away as if to suggest following them. You nodded in agreement, unsure of how the two of you would eventually reveal your relationship to the others. The two of you went to the dining hall rather awkwardly, at least to you. Throughout dinner you couldn’t help but steal glances at Shiro now that your brain was overclocked with thoughts of him. When he caught you, he would smile until someone distracted him with conversation. At one point he silently gestured you had goo left on your lip, to which you used your thumb to wipe it off before licking your thumb. It was innocent enough as you weren’t looking directly at him when you did it but the thought sparked something in him.

Dinner was over and it seemed that everyone decided to go their separate ways for the night. Shiro had said he was going to retire for the evening but you weren’t sure if you should talk to him further. Trying to keep a sense of normalcy you said nothing and went to your room to shower.

Shiro wanted to continue being with you but was unsure what he would say. He ended up walking up to your door, stopping when he heard the sound of your voice. You were…singing. He rested his hand on the door, pausing to recall the times you had sung in the shower before. The words were often muffled but he still liked to sit outside your door to listen so long as he knew no one would come by and spot him. He took a seat next you your door for old time’s sake.

The shower had taken a tad bit longer than you planned once you decided to shave. Shave for what? Most of the time you didn’t care about your body hair since no one ever saw it but… maybe tonight…no. Outside the bedroom door sat Shiro, waiting until he felt enough time had passed to let you unwind after the shower. Hearing footsteps in the hallway he immediately got to up to go back to his room to avoid whoever it was. Given up, he decided to wait to talk to you tomorrow instead.

You lie down on your bed naked, chosen to air dry tonight. The sheets felt good against your newly smooth skin, but you couldn’t stay nude all night. You never knew when there’d be an emergency, and learned that the hard way. Over time you had secretly collected shirts from the other paladins (aside from Pidge since she was much smaller) to use as sleep attire. Hunk and Shiro’s shirts had proven to be most useful but when Shiro had disappeared you couldn’t help but take a few more from his room out of grief. The scent brought you comfort. His shirt and a pair of shorts would be your usual pajamas.

Lying in bed unable to sleep, you had no idea how much time had passed but you were growing restless. Boldly you chose to go bother Shiro, but it took you a while to finally get to the door. You contemplated what you would do if he were asleep. You couldn’t just wake him up after all he’s been through. The halls were dark and quiet except the faint sound of the video game you assumed Pidge was playing on the big screen in the common room. Taking a deep breath, you knocked on his door lightly.

“Shiro…?” You tried to stay quiet by bringing you mouth close to the door.

“Come in.”

You pressed the button on the code entry to have the door slide open for you. Back pressed against the headboard Shiro sat up in his bed. You stood in the door-way unsure of what to do. He waved you over with a smile. Practically jumping onto his bed

“Is this my shirt?” He slipped his thumb into the back of your collar to look at the tag.

“Did Takashi Shirogane just look down the back of my shirt!?”

“Well technically it’s my shirt so…”

You play-slapped his chest in awe at his joke. “You can have it back if you want it.”

“No- no, you can keep it. It looks good on you.” He smirked.

“Are you sure?” You grabbed the bottom hem of your shirt with crossed arms about to lift it up past your shoulders. Slack-jawed and beet red he stared down at where your hands were.

“W-well….when you put it that way…” He touched his forehead to yours before pressing your hip back downwards to the bed. This was really happening! You slid your hands behind his neck to plant a kiss on him, gesturing approval. His Galra arm was positioned above your head, supporting his weight over you, as his left hand gently cupped around your hip. His mouth never left yours even when he paused to bite his lower lip in anticipation. You ran your fingers through his hair relishing the soft texture between your digits. Stealing glances at his face, you became proud at how intense his expression was as he hovered over you. His eyes stayed closed as you began to nudge his mouth open with the tilt of your head. You softly bit his bottom lip, arching your back as the kiss ended. This triggered him to let out a breathy exhale at the crook of your neck, sliding his rough hand up the hem of your shirt.

“Y/N… we shouldn’t…” But his mouth ended up on the soft spot of your neck.

You let out a gasp from the tingling sensation. “W-why not?” You raised your knee to graze your thigh against his groin, feeling a hard surprise. In response he ground into you, while bringing his thigh up against your wetness.

“Is this really what you want?” He completely stilled himself awaiting a response.

“Yes…” you thrust yourself against him again, this time attacking his neck with kisses.

With a groan he followed your rhythm with his hips, no longer concerned with any doubts he may have had. Over and over, he kept the pace, gradually increasing the pressure as much he could without inciting a burn. Your hands slid around his shoulders and down to the waistband of his sweatpants. Hooking your thumbs under the fabric, egging him on. He gave a husky growl, causing him to stop and trace both hands up your sides under the fabric, face buried in your neck, looking into your eyes asking for permission to continue. You arched your back and slid downwards on the bed, letting him glide the cloth up over your breasts and taking it completely off you. Immediately he nuzzled his face against your chest, gliding his tongue over your nipple. You produced a moan before he took it upon himself to knead the other nipple between his fingers.

“Jesus Christ!” Your thoughts were going wild and you resumed dry humping the life out of him. You grabbed at his shirt feeling his toned back, as you desperately wanted to feel his skin against yours. He paused when he realized this.

“Y/N-” He didn’t bring his eyes to yours. “My body isn’t… all that pleasant to look at.” Imagining that he was referring to his scars, you reassured him.

“I don’t believe that. I need to feel you against me.” You pulled at his shirt again with no more resistance from him. The poor man was battered and littered with pink, raised scars. Despite that he was of course jacked beyond belief. To avoid possibly seeing your shocked expression he immediately went back to fondling your chest with his tongue. You arched your back and relished in all the warmth this man was bathing you in. His fingers traced your skin downwards, leaving a tickling sensation behind before slipping his massive hand under both layers in your shorts. You let out a gasp at his bold gesture.

“Nnhh you’re so wet.” His fingers were sliding around every crevice that was smothered in your wetness, trying to spread it was far as he could. Out of desperation you bucked your hips causing his finger to slide into you inadvertently. You both groaned in response. Immediately he pulled out and yanked your shorts and panties right off your hips. In slight embarrassment you clamped your thighs together, face turning an even brighter red.

“Now now, no need to be self-conscious. Today we’re overcoming our insecurities, right?” He gingerly grabbed your thighs and pried them open, watching your expression to make sure you still wanted it. Your insecurity washed away as soon as he plunged his finger back inside you. It was thicker and deeper than your own fingers could ever go. Moaning, you moved against him in response. Taking the hint, he drew out his digit and slowly pushed it back in, feeling you from the inside. The wet sound and glistening image drove him over the edge. Using his other hand, he parted you open and dove in tongue first against your clit. You let out a long moan in pleasant surprise. It had been so long since you felt this good. His tongue lapped you up while his fingers filled you over and over; it was getting to be too much in the best way. Seeing the muscles on his back flexing as he fingered you was exciting you even more. “Oh fuck…” you couldn’t help but to moan as your back arched. It was too late to turn back; the intense stimulation had you seeing stars before you could stop yourself. Riding out the wave of pleasure; you knew it wasn’t going to be enough. He pulled away and wiped his mouth on his arm.

Reaching your fingers around the elastic of his pants, you began pulling them down away from his hips. You kissed him as leaned back, as he helped you undress him. Springing forth from his boxers his member looked strained for release, immediately hitting his stomach, erect.

As you egged him backwards towards the bed you crawled downwards to trace your tongue along his shaft. He let out a deep groan when you wrapped your lips around the tip. Unable to take him fully in your mouth, you used one hand to grasp the rest and the other hand slipped under his balls. You sucked him as far as your throat would let you without gagging. Rhythmically you slid him in and out making sure your tongue massaged every inch it could. His groaning was red-hot indulgence to your ears. You could tell he was trying not to slam dick down your throat. “Y/N…” your name escaped his lips. Hissing, he gently pushed you away from his groin to steal a kiss. Sliding his big hands under your ass, he scooped you towards him making sure your wet slit was pressed up against his crotch. Mouths intertwined, your hands around his neck, he pulled you back and fourth against him making sure you were good and soaked for him to enter. Gingerly, he slid the tip inside of you causing you both to shudder. Slowly pushing you towards the bottom of his shaft, Shiro let out a throaty moan, clearly excited. You could tell how tight you were by how big his dick felt inside you. You began to move gently against him knowing by his hesitation that he didn’t want to hurt you. Rolling your hips really helped to completely sheath him within you. He waited for you to move faster to be sure you were ready. You built up a steady pace before he started moving his hips with yours. The room was echoing with your panting breathes. One fist in his hair, you whispered in his ear :“I want you to feel good.” You found the soft spot on his neck and began to suck until he squeezed your ass in reaction.

With both hands he lifted you off him and pushed your back against the mattress. With both hands placed above your head he slid his dick back inside you. The new position let you feel his hard-sculpted body against yours, his pelvis rubbing against your clit with every push. Wrapping your arms and legs around him brought you closer. Although he was kissing you gently his pounding was forceful. He was beginning to lose control. Pumping in and out of you, his grunting became more erratic. Knowing that he was enjoying himself brought you great pleasure which you expressed by moaning loudly. “Y/N I can’t hold it much longer. Nngghh. You feel so fucking good.” This was exactly what you wanted to hear. “Takashi…please cum for me.” With those words he pounded you into the mattress. Back arching, you let out the build up that was growing within you. The deep hum of his groans and increased speed had you seeing stars. With one last deep thrust he hovered above you panting for air. He cradled you in for a soft kiss as he pulled out, rolling over so you could lay on top. Being there on his chest was all you’d been fantasizing about for months.

“Thank you…” He pressed his lips against your ear. “It’s felt like a lifetime since I’ve been able to immerse myself in anything other than fighting the Galra… You make me… happy.”

“I missed you so much Takashi.” Your words barely a whisper. “I’m glad I can bring you joy after all you’ve been through.” For the first time in years, the tears you shed were rooted in bliss.

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