#She’s literally fantastic when’s she’s delusional

[xx-sketchy-xx]

I like to make her crazy

It makes me giggle

[outer-edges]

JASKGKFKKSKS OH MY GOD UNCOVERED THE CURSED SPIDERSONA X TWILIGHT CROSSOVER I WROTE IN HIGH SCHOOL. LOSING MY MINDDDDD. BEING A TEENAGE GIRL DURING THE PANDEMIC WAS QUITE A TIME.

[37sommz-archive]

✼. THRU SPACE 'N TIME | MAPLE-SCENTED.

NOW PLAYING: canadian gp recap [ig, twt]. ✼. view:⠀masterlist⠀⸻⠀join the taglist⠀⸻⠀request. ✼. note:⠀just don't look too close at the edits lmao. my first smau, pls be nice <3

✹.⠀formula 1 just posted .ᐟ⠀⠀. . .⠀⠀

liked by astonmartinf1, misomms, and 658,927 others

@ f1⠀⠀⸻⠀⠀michaela sommers seals the win in an electrifying canadian grand prix! michaela scores her 8th victory in f1, with max verstappen and lando norris completing the podium 👏

view all 5,890 comments

username1 P1 BABYYYY IT'S OUR YEAR

username2 smells like contract negotiationsss

username3 lewis + fernando interrupting her interviews to scream about her winning 🥹

username4 STOP where username5 post race lewis practically throwing her in the air, alonso literally screaming into the mic username6 i love my family 🥰

⠀⠀. . .⠀⠀

✹.⠀michaela sommers just posted .ᐟ⠀⠀. . .⠀⠀

liked by cocosommers, astonmartinf1, and 830,927 others

@ misomms⠀⠀⸻⠀⠀first win in canada! wins always feel good but this one's extra maple-scented 🥞. thank you montreal for all the kindness and thank you to the entire team for keeping your cool ~ see you all in barcelona.

view all 8,374 comments

astonmartinf1 pressure pressure pressure, amazing job! 🥞

miriamsandile always proud darling, fantastic perseverance mimi

username7 can i pls marry ur daughter username8 real asf

danielricciardo 🥞🥞🥞

username9 i'm begging aston martin to let her do the food stand segment for every race weekend

username10 they need to make this a tradition asap username11 my delusional ass really thinks it's good luck atp username12 RIGHT she did it for melbourne and montreal and won both races...

liked by misomms & astonmartinf1

username13 the outfit flex... lewis hamilton when i catch you!!!!

⠀⠀. . .⠀⠀

⠀⠀. . .⠀⠀

⠀⠀. . .⠀⠀

⠀⠀. . .⠀⠀

✼. taglist:⠀

@cha-hot @certifiedlesbianbaddie @nichmeddar

@d3kstar @thewannabewriter @hwalllllllelujah

@pacmacs-macs @thearchieves @doodlehunz

@lavisenri @evie-119 @bxdbxtxh

@seaweed-orchid @glitterquadricorn @99snse

@ginghampearlsnsweettea @alliwantisadonut @hiireadstuff

@emilyval1

[trollprincess]

The actual sexualities of the Bridgerton siblings if Netflix and the people a little too devoted to the books wouldn’t have some kind of heart attack:

Anthony: Straight. Terrifically, fantastically straight. Every cell in that man’s body is heterosexual, with the exception of the one brain cell he shares with his brothers, which has to shift gears constantly depending on who needs its powers most at the moment. Anthony is so straight it’s impressive he didn’t impregnate Kate just by looking at her. Which is not a straight trait. It’s not an anybody trait, it’s literally fucking impossible, but if anyone could do it it’s those two.

Benedict: Bisexual as fuck. I would say pansexual but who taught this man how to sit in chairs?

This motherfucker is so bisexual he kind of hit on his own brother ten minutes into the new season. He is an absolute disaster of a human being. He has no idea if he’s flirting with 95% of the people he’s flirting with. Bi. As. Fuck.

Colin: Fluid. “Tracing freckles with your fingertips,” my ass. That man traveled to seventeen cities in a handful of months presumably banging anyone who sat still long enough. That said, I think if asked, he’d tell you whatever sexuality you wanted to hear. Or whatever he was feeling at the time. Or whatever sexuality he has on his itinerary for when he’s in Cyprus. Who gives a shit? He’ll be leaving in two weeks. Sure, whatever, I’m straight today, but don’t place any bets on Tuesday.

Daphne: Just a smidge bisexual. On the Kinsey scale, there’s just a scintilla of wiggle time between Simon and, like, that maid she made out with one time.

Eloise: Lesbian. Oh, she’s so into girls. That’s not to say that her future husband (here unnamed for book spoiler reasons) is not a perfectly lovely person who’s fantastic in bed. But also, she’s a lesbian. If she were alive today, she and Cressida would have been dating for six months before she realized that when you move in with a woman, share the same bed, and sometimes have sex together, you’re probably dating. Or delusional. Or both! These ARE the Bridgertons, after all.

Francesca: Demisexual. Introvert, on the spectrum, call her what you will, but Francesca’s only having sex with you if you dig past her hyperfixation with her pianoforte and correctly interpret her silence into English.

Gregory: Asexual. Only because it makes his ending in the books even funnier.

Hyacinth: Omnisexual. That woman will try ANYTHING. An. Y. Thing. Hyacinth likes a challenge. And she also likes to BE the challenge, which makes for an interesting dating life. Yes, yes, she’ll marry a cis straight guy eventually, but until she is the Jack Harkness of Mayfair and may God have mercy on whoever tries to stop her.

[mostofthingsmostofthetime]

My thoughts on The Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes movie

I don’t know if I liked it as much as the original films (maybe Mockingjay 1 & 2 as they are pretty emotionally draining), but I still enjoyed it.

I think where it fell a little flat for me is 1. The beginning was a bit slow (tbh I only really started getting interested when Lucy Gray stuck that snake down that girl’s dress & even then I enjoyed the story more when the setting changed from the Capitol to the district) 2. I knew Snow would survive 3. I’d already been spoiled online for a lot of stuff that happens & 4. while I know the director did his best to make Snow as “likeable” as he could for as long as possible, even before he started getting “a little too comfortable” with killing & snitching I didn’t find him as sympathetic as Katniss or Peeta (but that is probably again down to the fact that I know what he goes onto do & there’s no real way around that), this made engaging with him difficult for me.

The world is fascinating. Getting to see all the new locations we never had access to before as well as old locations now in a totally different light (for example district 12 which, while still clearly suffering, seemed like such a bustling industrial town compared to how it is in Katniss’s time). It might have a much more retro aesthetic but there's also just a more vibrant, natural, wild & lawless atmosphere to this movie compared to the others in the franchise. The whole scope of the film just felt more cinematic then I remember the others being yet also weirdly intimate. Maybe because it was one contained story & we knew the main character’s fate from the start. I also loved the title cards signifying the start of each section of the story like from the books & wished they'd done something similar for the other films. It just added a certain flair to the whole thing. Almost gave it the vibe of a tragic play.

The costuming was great. The bright red of the academy uniforms.  Flickerman’s snazzy suits. Snow’s dapper black & white outfit. Both peace keeper uniforms (despite one of them giving very ‘1930’s Germany’ vibes) looked great. Grandma might have been a bigot, but at least she was well dressed. Everything Dr Gaul wore (except the top that looked like a used tampon, lol) was exquisite. The main ladies of fashion, Tigris & Lucy Gray slayed. Our Future Capitol stylist looked like some regal yet exotic bird & Miss Survivor was giving Bohemian, country girl realness the entire time she was on screen. Even the extras were serving (like that random couple Snow walked past on his way to the reaping ceremony).

The music was amazing. Every song that played was fantastic (shout out to Olivia for her end credit contribution). The lyrics & instrumentation were beautiful & my god does Rachel Zegler have pipes! Anyone who says the singing scenes are cringy is just stupid like I’m sorry you can’t appreciate art. Also, the words ‘ballad’ & ‘songbirds’ are literally in the title. Plus, Lucy Gray is from the poorest district, so what exactly do those people want her to do in her free time? She can’t exactly hop on an X-box for a few hours. Not too mention that (as the offspring of someone who’s musically inclined) I can tell you, it’s completely realistic for a musician to use their craft to help them deal with trauma & Lucy Gray clearly had more than her fair share of that.

The Grandma'am helped to paint a sadly very realistic background for Snow. As who among us hasn’t met at least one delusional old person who thinks that their/their group’s suffering (regardless of the severity of it or the reason behind their former/newer status in society) means that no one else are deserving of even the tiniest shred of humanity & there are some people who are unlucky enough to not only be related to these people but be raised by them.

Hunter schafer as Tigris is clearly the superior Snow when it comes to things like empathy & overall mental stability but I do kind of wish they’d been more for her to do. Credit where credit is due though her & Tom did actually look like they could be related & I did buy their familial bond (which makes her appearance in Mockingjay so much sadder in hindsight).

Peter Dinklage as Casca Highbottom was a bit of a mix for me just due to his purpose as a character & the limit of film as a form of media. Like sure the audience know that Snow’s going to become an irredeemable monster in the end but without a window into his mind it really does just seem like the Dean is just out to get him & even when we find out why it seems kind of unfair. Like sure his dad sucked but haven’t the Games shown that blaming children for violence caused by others is unjust (& like ok he hates Coriolanus & probably the grandma but Tigris hadn’t done anything to deserve living in poverty, as she can’t control who she’s related to)? Plus, it felt like he could have at least tried taking Snow under his wing at some point to try to hinder Dr Gual’s influence. Saying all of that, though, Peter Dinklage is great at playing an addict with depression & the idea that some drunken rambling could lead to such long-lasting suffering is terrifying. Also its pretty realistic that living with that kind of guilt & in such a cruel environment for that long would make most people jaded & bitter, even if they did have good intentions.

Omg we finally get a Mayor family on screen & they’re assholes! Madge would be so disappointed 😭. It was interesting to see how harsh & overall “boot licky” the mayor & his family seemed compared to decades later, which makes sense as the war wasn’t that long ago for them so the dad probably felt more incentive to align himself with the Capitol as well as not feeling very connected to the district people as 12’s decline probably didn’t fully set in until they really started running low on coal & Snow became president (oh I just know he wanted to blow that district off the map 😆). I also wouldn’t put it past Billy to come up with some sob story of how he really does love Mayfair but wicked Lucy Gray is somehow preventing them from being together. Still no excuse to try to send her to her death twice in one week, though. Definitely not a girl’s girl.

Ok, so a liar. Cheat. Drunk & someone who hits women. Is there anything good about Billy Taupe? Also, trying to get your ex back, while your current girlfriend is literally standing right next to you? Dude, have some god damn back bone! You made a choice, now stick to it. Also, fumbling Lucy Gray, for a girl like that? What’s it like having no brains or taste? Well, too bad, coz you’re stuck with her forever now, lol.

Viola Davies, the actress that you are. What else is there to say? Dr Gaul is almost comic book levels of insane. Like she is how the Right see women in STEM, on crack! I don’t know what she did to get into character, but whatever it was, it worked.

Jason Schwartzman as Lucretius Flickerman is a very interesting addition to the story despite playing such a small & seemingly insignificant role. He is strange in how unthreatening he is while also extremely blasé about the abhorrent violence he witnesses that it’s as funny as it is disturbing. Making him come across as  more human yet harsher than his son, who at least pretends to care about the tributes (in a very Capitol way, obviously but still). There’s also a polish & confidence to Tucci’s performance that I think Schwartzman did a great job of avoiding copying (despite knowing what audiences were probably expecting) because not only are their characters in entirely different stages of their careers but the whole ethos of the Hunger Games is different in Snow’s youth than it is in Katniss’s. Caesar is a well established presenter & during his time, the games have always been a success (minus the year with the tundra) that the entire Capitol is invested in & seemingly in support of. On the other hand Lucretius had the unique task of not only coming into a job like this with zero experience (I mean imagine going from announcing the weather to presenting the fucking hunger games) but also there were no vibes to try to emulate let alone guidelines to follow because he truly was the first person to do this. On top of that, the "event" his presenting has been panned for years as both boring & unethical. Schwartzman brought a slightly awkward, experimental, yet try hard vibe (like a comedian who's desperate to get a laugh) that I think worked wonderfully for the character.

Tom Blyth's performance was great & he was visually perfect for a young Snow (the power of a good wig! Who knew lol). Even having the cool, analytical stare of Donald Sutherland, down pat. While his appearance was very Eminem during his peacekeeping days, his realisation in the cabin and subsequent breakdown in the woods were crazy. There was so much tension between him & Rachel in that scene that for a second, it literally felt like all the air had been sucked out of the room. I could almost hear the record scratch for both of them, & all that building paranoia finally coming to a sudden crescendo in the way that it did? Pure cinema!

Josh Rivera, as Sejanus, was honestly a mix for me. Obviously, I agree with his morals, but his way of going about it did seem a little dumb. However I do think it’s pretty realistic that a teenager, especially a rich one, would be rather naive. Also I’ve heard that he’s smarter in the book & I think at times my frustration with him is more just down to the fact that I’m seeing him from Snow’s point of view. Meaning scenes that would be portrayed as noble in any other film instead come across as almost painfully inconvenient because the focus is always on how they affect Snow rather than the actual victims of the situation. Lastly, sorry, Snowjanus shippers, I just don’t see it (especially on Snow’s end), but whatever floats your boat.

Rachel Zegler played Lucy Gray with the perfect mix of natural charm & emotional vulnerability with clear pride in her culture & a refusal to let the world around her change who she is. Yet there was also an air of mystery & a subtle resilience to her that makes her potentially surviving out in the woods for years without being detected actually believable (though I don’t buy the theory that she went on to become president Coin). Definitely the highlight of the movie for me.

PS. I'd love to know what you think of my review in the comments/tags & am open to criticism (as long as it's respectful) just remember that I'm only talking about the movie so please don't reference anything spersific to the book.

[itsclydebitches]

Continuing my perhaps delusional argument/hope that Ted permanently returning to Kansas is just a red herring, I was thinking about our references and callbacks this episode. Specifically, how they don't paint Kansas in a positive or unique light.

The Wizard of Oz pinball game is definitely the most on-the-nose nod to his return, yet in the scene itself Ted is literally refusing to play.

When we get a closeup on the machine we're shown Dorothy's house spinning out of control. That is, a moment when she leaves Kansas for the bright world of Oz, not the ruby slippers of her return.

Similarly, Beard loses his game before Ted walks over. The ending of the Wicked Witch is one wherein Dorothy (Ted) does not go back home.

(I'm not entirely sure what to do with this one yet, but having Mae quote "This Be the Verse" is certainly A Choice. Though I think the overall message -- people, specifically parents, will inevitably hurt their kids -- is an uplifting and very relevant argument within Ted Lasso's heartfelt context -- ergo we should acknowledge that we'll never be perfect while still striving to improve -- but that last line? Oof. "Get out early as you can / And don't have kids yourself"? That's not the proposed solution I'd expect for an episode that was sending Ted back to his son for good. Obviously Ted already has Henry, but it may be significant that Mae eschews a generic 'You can do it!' argument for a far more nuanced and harder to swallow conclusion, perhaps one that heralds Ted's controversial decision to stay separated from Henry for at least part of the year.)

(Also let's toss in the fact that Dottie uses a football metaphor -- not American football -- to describe how Ted needs to parent: sometimes you lose, sometimes you win, mostly you just tie, and all you can do it keep playing.)

Finally, we've got references to both BBQ sauce and sunflowers via Ted's WiFi password and the bread Dottie bakes him, Ted's "favorite."

Half a season ago these would have been straightforward references to Kansas, positive ones at that. However, post-S3E6 (literally titled "Sunflowers") Ted has both of these beloved objects tied to the UK instead. He enjoys the beauty of Van Gogh's Sunflowers in the Amsterdam museum and finds a BBQ sauce so good that it inspires him to (hopefully!) win it all in his English sport.

It might just be me reading into things because I'm looking for my preferred ending to the series... but also I don't think I am because it's weird that Kansas is continually framed as a negative this season. Ted is still super awkward with Michelle. Her new boyfriend is kinda awful and likewise makes him incredibly uncomfortable (understandably). The Wizard of Oz references aren't targeting the happy aspects of the story, or even the parts about going home. The symbolic references to Ted's beloved state (sunflowers, BBQ sauce, the little green army men) have all been integrated into his life here. We get a whole episode about how once Ted learns to focus on Henry instead of Michelle, Henry has a fantastic time living in London. Hell, this episode opens with Ted enthusiastically greeting everyone he passes on his walk, a beloved member of the community, a staple of this town... and then his mood turns sour when he hits his Kansas-sprung mom.

Obviously Ted is undergoing some last-minute growth when it comes to being a father to Henry (and healing the rift with Dottie), but I think Ted's in-universe improvement is misleading, implying that because he may think he needs to return to Kansas, that's actually how the story is going to end. If that were the end-goal though, I would expect the subtext to have a more hopeful, optimistic feel to it; something that not just implies Ted's return, but argues why he would want to outside of Henry.

If none of that is relevant... that's going to be even worse for me than Ted just going back to Kansas. A Kansas ending framed as a positive is far from my preference, but it's (arguably) a strong conclusion to Ted's journey. A Kansas ending after all these implied negatives both isn't my preference and feels like more objectively bad writing.

[anxiety-lemsbian]

‧͙⁺˚･˖ ࣪⭑☾[ᴅᴏ ʏᴏᴜ ʀᴇᴍᴇᴍʙᴇʀ ʜᴏᴡ ᴛʜᴇ ʀᴀʙʙɪᴛꜱ ɢʟᴀʀᴇᴅ ᴀꜱ ᴡᴇ ᴅʀᴏᴠᴇ ᴅᴏᴡɴ ᴛʜᴇ ʀᴏᴀᴅ? ᴊᴇᴀʟᴏᴜꜱ, ᴍᴀʏʙᴇ, ᴏʀ ꜱᴄᴀʀᴇᴅ. ɪ ᴡᴀꜱ ᴀʟᴡᴀʏꜱ ʙᴇʜɪɴᴅ ʜᴇʀ ᴡᴀɪᴛɪɴɢ ꜰᴏʀ ᴛʜᴇ ᴡɪɴᴅᴏᴡ ᴛᴏ ᴅʀᴏᴘ. ᴛʜᴇ ʟᴀᴛɪɴ ɴᴀᴍᴇ ꜰᴏʀ ᴛʜᴇ ꜰᴏx ɪꜱ ᴠᴜʟᴘᴇꜱ ᴠᴜʟᴘᴇꜱ. ʏᴏᴜ ᴀʟᴡᴀʏꜱ ᴛʜᴏᴜɢʜᴛ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ꜱᴏᴜɴᴅᴇᴅ ɴɪᴄᴇ.]☽˖ ࣪⭑･˚⁺‧͙

hi! i'm aster.

she/they, minor, ENG + some ESP and Auslan, poet, audhd, sapphic ace, careless man’s careful daughter, infj, shark lover, lucy dacus listener, aries sun, gemini moon, pisces rising, #1 boygenius (+ solo careers) obsessor, ravenclaw but FUCK JKR, pinterest princess (androgynous), aspiring forest witch, chronic fatigue + generalized anxiety disorder + depression sufferer, greek salad lover

FREE PALESTINE 🇵🇸🇵🇸🇵🇸

current hyperfixation/talk to me about:

arcane

special interests:

sylvia plath, boygenius, bluey, sharks

fandoms:

everything sucks, boygenius (+solo careers), jucy, gilmore girls, brooklyn 99, heartbreak high, bluey, bridgerton, osemanverse, sunflowers and lavender, kiki’s delivery service, hamilton, matilda the musical, ruby redfort, aurora cycle (zila's my GIRL), nevermoor, stargirl, agggtm, biac, wednesday, lady bird, the owl house, arcane

books:

the anthropocene reviewed, the bell jar, stargirl, loveless, radio silence, death sets sail, goddess girls series, dear poppy, aurora cycle, anne of green gables series, sick bay, henry hamlet’s heart, hani and ishu’s guide to fake dating, nevermoor, iwbft, heartstopper, solitare, the perks of being a wallflower,

ships:

wenclair, lumity, cazzie, emisue, caitvi but mostly just because i want vi to be happy

artists:

lucy dacus, chappell roan, hozier, florence and the machine, radiohead, phoebe bridgers, julien baker, gracie abrams, noah kahan, boygenius, taylor swift? (melbourne n3), lorde, cavetown, mitski, eliza and the delusionals, boyish, beabadoobee

songs:

claw machine, nuvole bianche, leonard cohen, garden song, there it goes, triple dog dare, home by now, no surprises, cartwheel, me and my dog, american teenager, good news, scorpio rising, townie, last words of a shooting star, strawberry blond, we’re in love, so much wine, apple cider, fantastic, ma meilleure ennemie,

playlist:

psa: when i use 'girl' in relation to me (crafty girl summer, etc.) i mean it androdgynously :))

my sideblogs are:

@leftfromrightfromwrong : boygenius and sometimes art

@listen2yourownvoice : radio silence+ a bit of general osemanverse

tags: # aster writes- poetry. #aster writes i guess- more poetry. #asters saved posts- saved posts. #aster loves boygenius- me loving boygenius. #aster's lyric rambles- when i just post a bunch of song lyrics in a format. #aster bawls on the floor- due to sadness, cringiness or laughter, i am on the floor and out for the count. # aster thinks (not really) - what it sounds like pretty much # it’s me i’m the girlfriend - can’t even explain this one actually #percy <3- literally just @trashmeowcan #ari 🌻 - @waitingforthesunrise

@asterisalemsbian • Pronouns.page

link to my old intro post:

[jordanlihive]

Ooof I'm worried because they have such insanely amazing set up and chemistry plus something literally NO OTHER SHIP has with a bigender character but it seems that they're skipping over all their big moments? And they have time for them the episodes are so short the writers of the boys have done a fantastic jobs developing the friendships/relationships over their 3 seasons but those are different writers and a completely different show also the boys has always been 1 hour long like they never go under 56 minutes so they have more time for that growth. Idk seeing them not show us the night they actually got together and then they're just together? And then you film a scene of them talking about really essential things and then you.. cut it like what are we doing here exactly???

It’s insane how much chemistry Jaz has with London and Derek!! The fact that the main ship is queer and POC but we’re missing those important bits of development due to it being cut or the mind wipe.. certainly a choice.

(Putting the rest under a cut bc this is sorta long!)

I choose to be delusional, however, when it comes to Marie x Jordan.

The other three romantic ships went down. Imo Cate and Andre felt pushed/didn’t flow.. we’re introduced to Luke x Cate being the it couple only for him to die and then we get Andre and Cate fucking.. which I wasn’t surprised over because I feel like that’s something that’s common in media: the main guy dies and then his gf(or wife) and his bestie fuck.. and ofc they’re close because we’re led to believe they’ve always been good friends but then we later find out they’ve been secretly fucking the entire time and had feelings. We all know how that played out.

But regardless I just didn’t find them compelling.

Sam and Emma were cute but realistically I knew deep down it wasn’t gonna work out… and as the episodes progressed I didn’t like how their relationship was just Emma saying “Sam, calm down. Look at me.” She isn’t a pick me girl but that’s what their relationship was starting to give, very much her trying to calm her explosive man.. and I’m not faulting Sam because he’s really been through it and he’s well within his right to want revenge. But what he said to her was nastyyy and I’m just happy that she’s free from that because it was very quickly turning into a toxic ship

Marie x Jordan had a great build up. From rivals and teasing to Jordan fighting Luke for Marie, to them becoming acquaintances and teaming up, becoming friends with sexual tension, to then making out (+some more team up) and lastly Marie saving them.. it’s beautiful, it’s delicious. They’re the only ship to make it past s1… I’m really hoping they give us that development for s2.. more to look forward to at least . They better not drop the ball on them I swearrr bc we ride at dawn

[dwellordream]

thoughts on HOTD episode 2, season 2 (spoilers below)

phia saban and tom glynn carney knocked it out of the park this episode, and so did olivia cook. alicent's panic attack as she blames herself for invoking some sort of karmic retribution by having sex outside of marriage, helaena and aegon's animalistic grief over the loss of their son- it was all fantastic. i'm glad the episode did not quickly breeze over the response to jaehaerys' death in an effort to speed through the plot. helaena's meltdown when the funeral procession is stuck in a pothole exemplifies her awareness of the horrible story she's in. she knows there is no way for anyone to win this war, and that the suffering will only triple with every turn. she's beloved by the common folk as a martyr, and it horrifies and disgusts her.

some fans are pissed rhaenyra doesn't take any responsibility for the murder/is shown as being horrified and disgusted by daemon's actions. i understand the argument that her being unaware further reduces her autonomy, but i also feel this instance shows the fundamental disconnect between her and daemon. they aren't actually equals in this relationship, based on how it began. not just because he is her uncle and because he groomed her as a child, but because they've never fully trusted one another, and they can't. on some level they will always be rivals for the throne, because daemon will never be 100% comfortably fully ceding his authority to his wife and abandoning any hope of himself on the iron throne.

a single scene between baela and jace is somehow more than they did with the entirety of season one, but the bar is literally in hell here. i hope the writers make more time for the twins in season two, because it's a waste of their characters to constantly relegate them (and often the velaryons in general) to the shadows.

of course aemond is drinking milk while lying in the lap of a brothel madam, lmao. as much as this scene has been mocked, i think people miss the point. aemond is not supposed to be a swaggering badass. he is a deeply disturbed, pathetic person. that doesn't mean he can't have cool moments, but he is a delusional, amoral, neurotic person. he craves any kind of maternal affection and approval, and he warps events to match his own internal expectations.

i'm not sure if i buy mysaria's change of heart and decision to help rhaenyra, not because it wasn't well-acted (and i'm glad they gave mysaria and rhaenyra a scene together), but because it just seems like she's putting it all on the line yet again for a family that has repeatedly shown they will use and abuse her without thought. that said, the erryk/arryk scene was really well done, and i'm relieved they didn't have rhaenyra suddenly show some secret training in arms, lol

i think the 'daeron does exist!' reveal was very awkward, and they absolutely could have mentioned him before this, but i suppose they wanted to dangle daeron as this surprise dark horse for the greens? idk i'm curious to see what they do with him. overall, i enjoyed this episode more than the first, and i'd definitely give it an 8/10. pretty good, and i hope the season continues with this stronger writing.

[yurisorcerer]

That was really good!

Gosh, I have many thoughts, but I'm not sure how well I'll be able to articulate them given that I'm kind of tired at the moment.

So, my main love here is for the characters. I think people tend to sell Dungeon Meshi on its worldbuilding and I do get that (it's very complex and is quite well thought-out), but the characters are what really grabbed me. I don't think there was a single member of the main cast I didn't love. Laios is such a delightfully weird monster manual fanboy and I 100% agree with the people who say he feels neurodivergent and that this feels intentional. Senshi is awesome and it's very funny how the manga is extremely horny for him. Chilchuk brings a profound Divorced Dad energy to the cast that I think is great for bouncing off of the other characters. Izutsumi is interesting by how she contrasts with the earlier party members, I want to think about her role in the story more. I think she was kind of meant to give us an "outcast's perspective" of sorts? I think she's good at being that, but I feel like having blown through most of the manga in a few days may have hampered my appreciation of some of the more subtle aspects of her character.

Marcille, though, is my favorite; as someone who is also a really fussy eater and just kind of tightly-wound in general I found her really relatable. She's also super, super, super pretty and cute but we don't need to get into that right now. I cannot be the first person to point out how, when she becomes the dungeon lord, her behavior starts feeling extremely manic, right? I suffer from delusional episodes that include very difficult to ignore intrusive thoughts, and I thought the whole bit she went into about how being the dungeon lord feels felt very familiar in that respect, and it really hit home for me.

(On the flip side, having your desires eaten by the demon seems similar to depression. I've been there, too.)

Other stuff! I like the whole overarching theme of eating both in the literal sense and as a general metaphor for going through one's life. In the very last chapter Marcille says something to the effect of, perhaps this journey was to teach us to accept death, and I don't think that's necessarily the entirety of what the series is going for, but that's part of it definitely. There's a whole circle of life thing going on here. The manga is very....sensory? Lots of focus on taste of course but also scent and feeling. Lots of really strong imagery along those lines throughout the entirety of it.

I set the worldbuilding aside earlier but it is super neat actually, also. I still don't love the general conceits of a western-style fantasy setup, but I think this is honestly about as well as it's possible to do this material. Everyone has a motivation for their actions that feels inspired by experience and history rather than just Dwarves Do X and Elves Do Y and so on. There's a LITTLE of that, but not nearly as much as is typical for this kind of thing. In particular, I liked the orcs. Their usage as a symbol is perhaps somewhat fraught (I'm not the person to make that call either way), but it felt like it was coming from a good place and they're just treated so much better here than comparable people in other media, idk. It felt nice to me.

The art! The art is fucking gorgeous, like, if I wanted to get someone to read this manga this is one of the things I'd mention. The entire dungeon feels so wonderfully lived-in and ancient. You can practically feel the stonework in some panels. (Sidebar here! The anime is really good at capturing this, do watch the anime it's fantastic.)

Some other random stray thoughts:

-The circumstances she gets it in obviously suck, but Marcille's dungeon lord outfit honestly serves hard and everyone should get off her case about it.

-I ended up liking the captain of the Canaries a lot more than I thought I would. He's just an interesting character all around.

-I also really love Sissel / Thistle / apparently how you romanize this is a source of some contention. I feel sooooo bad for the guy. He just wanted to keep everyone safe! It's not his fault that his idea of keeping everyone safe ended up being influenced by a lion-headed demon from outside of reality and corrupted into a suffocating hellscape for those same people! OK maybe it's a little his fault

-I like the diversity in appearances across the characters. This is a thing I wish more manga did this well.

-Laios' kingly titles in the final chapter, RANKED from MOST to LEAST badass: 1. Laios of the Three Heads (based as fuck, makes people ask questions when they hear about you in a history book several centuries down the line), 2. The Demon-Eater (badass and very specific) 3. The Vegetable-Armored (basically gets the same reaction as #1, but with a more comedic lean) 4. Demon King Laios (this honestly seems pretty disingenuous but it is dope) 5. The Dragon-Slayer (very generic, also not even the most impressive part of what he did) 6. The Lord of the Dungeon (Crusader Kings 2 auto-generated-ass name) 7. Pervy Tallman (this sounds like a bad comedian)

-I want to kiss Marcille on the lips

-who said that

-haha I wouldn't mind the Canaries coming to arrest me am I right fellow lesbians

-who said that (part 2)

anyway yeah really good manga highly recommended. I'm not sure if it's a (get out the scare quotes folks) "Personal Favorite" per se, but it might become one over time. Usually such things take a bit to settle with me. The fact that I have any interest in reading it again is a good sign, though. 90% of the time when I'm done with media I'm fine with never revisiting it again. Dungeon Meshi I would very much like to revisit, both in the form of the anime that's airing right now and also I think I'd like to re-read the manga in a few years when I'm at a different place in my life to see what I think of it a little farther down the line. I liked it a lot, and I think it will stick with me.

[dearmahiru-archive]

I plan on writing a full post about I Love You but I hate people claiming that Mahiru is delusional or selfish. The first few moments of the MV is her getting off the carasel, the manifestation of her happy dream world, to go back to sleep. It's painted very clear that she understands the carasel is dilapated but continues to ride it because it provides her a sense of comfort.

Mahiru: "But I’ve made up my mind. I’ll properly convey my feelings too. He’s dead. It… it might have been because of my love."

I feel like people are ignoring that Mahiru blames herself for her boyfriend's suicide. She's not crazed or obsessed, she is coping by picturing an idyllic world where she and her boyfriend are safe. Even when she's riding the carasel, the hanged corspe of her boyfriend is revolving behind her in the back of her mind.

I should note that, personally, I'm in the camp that everything in the forest scene is literal. This is for two reasons:

As of now there hasn't been a character with two symbolic worlds in a single MV. There's only ever one world with fantastical elements (T2 Haruka and Shidou's home), or a metaphorical world and a real one (T1 Mu's hourglass / Her school).

Mahiru's crime took place in a forest as seen in Undercover. If it's a metaphorical forest then... why does he literally die in a forest?

Which brings us to the rat-feeding scene. It hasn't been said outright but in combination with saying she's "crazy" and therefore unforgivable, there's this implication that Mahiru desired feeding her boyfriend a dead rat. Even if you take this scene as metaphorical—Mahiru did not want to feed her boyfriend this rat!

"Saying I love you but doing what I did, I know I have no right, crossed and covered in sin My love, it scored an own goal, destroyed my love and me with its weight Tell me, oh tell me why, can’t I just do it right?"

You can clearly see her boyfriend is bleeding and dying from starvation. Mahiru is feeding him this rat because she wants to help her boyfriend to not fucking die. What an unforgivable act done out of selfishness...!

Even if you find this disgusting, Post-Mahiru lamenting on this literally says she had no right to behave this way and she destroyed her relationship. Combined with the glitched-out typography what makes you think she's doing this to get her kicks off or out of malice.

I feel like im going crazy here because why does she deserve to be die for committing the cardinal sin of being a bad girlfriend. She is already suicidal, her mental health is deteriorating, she has already suffered for the sins she's commited. She's constantly mischaracterized as some stalker or some yandere and I'm just so so so tired of it.

[ninetiescoppola]

SINGLE, SO WHAT?

A few months ago I went to my long term orthodontist. I have known her since I was fourteen, we gossip and tell stuff about our lives, just girls being girly. But this time that I left her office I almost had a little stroke for two things, one because she said “you must be really sad without a boyfriend” and the second was because I would have to wear braces again. I didn’t say a word, just nodded my head (for both phrases). On my way home I started to think: when a relationship could save me from my depression? 

My whole life I never had a healthy relationship. At first I thought that the problem was me, but then a few months apart I could see the awful and ugly truth (and when I say ugly I mean literally). When I look back and see those old mistakes I get chills, feel immediately nauseous and have a little voice in my head saying “what the hell were you thinking?”, but then the same thing happens over and over again every year, it’s like a cycle with no end. This year I decided that something had to change, so I chose celibacy… Or almost. Just a short break from men. Not having a crush on somebody is the most amazing feeling in the world. I feel that I could make the new Miss Dior commercial just to show how light and fresh I am. 

I kinda feel guilty for never having a serious boyfriend. I'm always so delusional and sensitive about everything that I totally ignore the walking red flags. It's like I was blind to all the bad traits and only be able to see things that you find fantastic at first, but then you realize that it was the bare minimum and you feel like a complete idiot for the rest of your life. I remember that this happened with my first boyfriend. I was a fifteen year old freshman in high school and we had the same classes. If the time machine were created today I would turn back just to slap myself on the face several times until my younger self gives up the idea of dating that creep. Oh, I forgot to tell the story… In summary, we dated for two months and he lied, cheated, treated me like shit and humiliated me in front of my friends. Turns out that actually he was dating my best friend at the time who moved from Chile. I found that out a few weeks later after we broke up on a facebook post. I felt crushed. For months I thought that was my fault because I wasn’t good, pretty or smart enough to be his girlfriend. And one day I realized that life took back something that clearly wasn’t good for me. It was not worth it. I had to get through all of that shit to see how amazing I was. A year after they broke up too. 

As I said before, I have always been a delulu or a Charlotte York kind of girl. I don't know if it's because I have too much pisces on my birth chart or if it's because I'm just a f-ing fool. Always idealizing the perfect guy with the perfect traits and the perfect personality. I understand that everyone has flaws but why does life keep sending me people with JUST flaws? C’mon universe I expected more from you!

After a while, I stopped searching for the ideal guy and started focusing on myself. All those years being a men's carpet I had decided that a makeover would be perfect: eight hours in a hairdresser’s salon, thousands of bucks on clothes and lots of skincare products later, I became a new person. And then I found my true perfect match: a credit card.

Having a boyfriend is really nice, but enjoying your own company and not owing nothing to anyone can be truly fantastic. I had to learn that the hardest way. Every weekend I enjoy a very caloric treat, sit my big ass on the couch and watch a movie or a whole season of a TV show in a row. After all, I rather suffer for not being some hot actor’s girlfriend than suffer for a stupid asshole who is proud to think that having a dick is a sign of dignity (hot boyfriend of the month: Nicholas Chavez).

[mjrtaurus]

Gonna post this under a cut because this is just a vent. Be warned that it discusses abuse

So, anyone who has followed this blog for any prolonged length of time can probably tell you that my grandmother routinely abused me, and that my mother was bedridden and unable to do much for me about that for the majority of my life.

Lately one of the things that I’ve been deconstructing that has really been fucking me up is how she tried for years to make me question my sense of reality.

She used to tell me- when I was still stuck living with her- that I believed that superpowers existed, magic and fictional characters… stuff like that. That she was “concerned” for me and knew I was “unwell” for thinking like that.

Now if I was say, in my tweens and teens, then yeah, not being able to differentiate between fiction and reality is something to be concerned about.

But here’s the thing, I did know the difference, but that didn’t fit her “woe is me, I am cursed with caring for a defective child, please give me attention” narrative.

I was an autistic child playing make believe by myself because I didn’t have any friends to play with outside of school. I read fantasy novels and drew dragons and my favorite book characters because it was a special interest. I knew superheroes and fantastical creatures and fictional book characters weren’t real, but because I liked it all so much, she automatically assumed I had no ability to differentiate between reality and fiction.

Because I had special interests, and because she couldn’t have been assed to learn who I was as a person, or how autism functions on a basic level, and that learning these bare minimum things would mean that she had to take responsibility and admit she was wrong and apologize to me, she chalked me up as a delusional child that needed tough love and Jesus to (sometimes literally) whip me into shape.

And no, not for being disruptive at school, not for getting into fights, not for sneaking out, not for doing drugs, not for getting in trouble with the law… JUST for having a special interest.

Imagine dragging a child to an altar to beg for forgiveness twice every Sunday, once every Wednesday, and two Saturdays out of every month for the “sin” of having a special interest.

Imagine telling that child they weren’t being “good” for having a special interest, and telling them God could come back at any second and take everyone who is “good” away and leave everybody else to live and die in despair and spend their afterlife burning alive for all eternity?

Imagine looking at a child reading books about wizards and drawing dragons and playing video games to escape the hell you have created for them, and coming to the conclusion that they are the one out of touch with reality.

Now imagine, if you will, that child being but one of the many that you’ve done this horrific bullshit to.

[chaosandwolves]

Fans like you are just so adorable. You wouldn’t have 911 without that bigger name who, let’s not forget, they created the entire show for that keeps your baby boys employed. But hey whatever. How about let’s all sit down and discuss inequality? Because everyone knows the scales have always tipped in favor of the black woman who has spent literal decades putting her entire heart and soul into her craft over young attractive white men who look good in tight t-shirts.

Don’t pretend you have nothing against her when you write delusional drivel like that.

*sigh*

I'm gonna indulge you for a moment here even though I know there is no answer that will satisfy you cause you want to believe my statement was racially (and horny) motivated when it wasn't at all.

Honestly it says more about you than me that you automatically assume I want Ryan and Oliver (I guess that's who you mean by "your baby boys") to be nominated instead of her when all I said was that she isn't the only one who deserves it.

Like there are other ppl than those two who I believe do a fantastic job on the show and that includes Kenny, Peter and Tracey, Aisha and JLH.

And it's weird you're reducing Oliver and Ryan to their looks when they've repeatedly delivered amazing performances.

Yes, they might have had advantages in the industry but that also doesn't erase their work and skills.

I never said she doesn't deserve it.

And I'm very aware of inequality with these things.

Which is part of why I don't like them because I think they're way less about the actual art and performances than they claim to be.

And you just also kinda supported what I said; that she deserves to be nominated because she's made herself a career (which is great and her performance in Wakanda Forever is one of my favorite moments in the MCU and she put her heart into that and it was great to see it acknowledged)

and that's how it works with the awards

and that's also what furthers the inequality and is the reason why historically black, poc and indigenous actors haven't been acknowledged as much when they should have

because more often than not it's about the names and numbers first and about the actual performances second (if at all)

otherwise a lot more productions and performances would get acknowledged with these awards

And that's why I think they're bs (and yes, still, I want ppl to be acknowledged through them, you can call me a hypocrite for this if you want)

I know that her name is important for the show and I mean she's an exec prod on this as well

Still doesn't negate the performances of the others.

I think the show has more than one amazing actor and I would like their performances to be acknowledged, too.

[redwineconversation]

Lyon - Chelsea Postgame Thoughts

Short version: I hate everything; we played like shit; I hate losing.

People will rip into Carpenter for Chelsea's goal, and while they're not wrong to do so, I do think Horan, Damaris, and the ghosts of Christmas past known as Lyon's offense played worse.

So let's get into it.

I think it's completely fair to hold Carpenter accountable for Reiten's goal. She's played at the top level before, she's played the Champions League before. Making that kind of mistake is inexcusable. She should have known better.

Now I know the flip side of the argument is she's still coming back from the ACL injury and there's going to be a level of self-doubt. That's not going to go away overnight, and I understand and respect that. It's going to be there for a while, and it's going to be there until she regains confidence in herself. PTSD on the field is real, I acknowledge that, and I can understand why she did what she did.

That doesn't mean I excuse it.

(You can like a player and still hold them accountable for their actions. It's not that hard!)

With the exception of that dumb mistake which lead to the goal, I did think Lyon's defense held up. Gilles and Renard have an established partnership, and Gilles maintains her composure in big moments. That's necessary. Rumors are circling that she will be one of the 2023 extensions, I kind of hope she is. I miss MBock, don't get me wrong, but that doesn't mean I don't want things to work out with Gilles.

Morroni held up quite well too. She doesn't scare opponents the way Bacha does, but again, you get what you see with Morroni: a no-nonsense defender who just does her job. She doesn't lob crosses into the box the way Bacha does, but, sometimes you just need your left back to defend, nothing more.

Now onto the midfield: Marozsan underperformed, Dabritz finally showed she is human, the kindest thing I can say about Horan is that she remained on the field for 90 minutes. Majri moves at the same speed as I do when I am caught in LA rush hour traffic on a Wednesday morning. When Damaris is on, she's on; this was not one of those days. Van de Donk probably played the best out of the entire midfield because she seemed to be the only vested in the outcome of the game.

We saw what our future midfield will look like without Henry's hatred of losing about boy did I not like the ending. You need players who will drag their teammates over the finish line by the scruff of their neck. Van de Donk was the only one who showed that intention today.

And now for the ghosts of Christmas past: @Aulas time to open the checkbook for actual strikers, my bud. Because whatever our front line was is not it. I like Le Sommer and think she is a fantastic mentor for the team, and her experience is really important, but her performance today was horrific, and that's putting it lightly. Cascarino was extremely disappointing again. Becho is not ready for big games, Malard is close to putting me on suicide watch. Cannot believe that Bompastor thought that a player they had literally sent back to the reserves to regain form/confidence was going to get them a goal against Chelsea. It's delusional.

Which leads to Bompastor herself. I think it's fair to say now that it was the Lyon players and their sheer hatred of losing and experience which dragged them over the finish line in the final against Barcelona, not Bompastor herself. Because if you look at what happened when those core players got injured, Lyon fell apart while the coach remained the same.

So, do I think Lyon will be able to turn it around next Thursday at Stamford Bridge? Nope.

But here's also the thing: Lyon has been in this situation before. If any team can turn this around, it's probably them. Or at least it used to be.

Can't quite say I recognize my team right now.

[aviculor]

Natty Knocks, a new release I chose because it stars Bill Moseley and Robert Englund. Babysitter protecting her charges from a serial killer. Let's go.

The synopsis kind of spoils that Moseley's character is in fact the son of Natty Knocks despite him being dead according to Englund's character's exposition dump. But that much was kind of obvious. I would also hazard a guess that Englund's character is the son's father since they wouldn't bring Freddy Krueger himself into the cast just to be some rando real estate agent.

I knew this wouldn't be top shelf, I just wanted to save it for this late in the game because it literally takes place around Halloween. And as I said, star power. It's your pretty standard fare, a bunch of teenagers stumble across a mystery and have to unravel the truth before they get killed. Not making any huge splashes. What was that other film I saw recently? She Came From The Woods. It's a lot like that one.

I will give credit where credit is due, Moseley plays a fantastic serial killer. His performance is carrying this.

The fact that he's a cop also means he's in control over everything that's happening, adding another layer of fear through dramatic irony. Though I'm not sure how he's getting away with acting like a complete freak without a mask of sanity even in front of other cops. Or how he managed to become a cop in the first place considering his entire identity is stolen and there's no way he'd pass the psych evaluation. I'm also not sure how Natty Knocks became remembered as some urban legend ghost witch when she was not only a real person but a minor celebrity who lived only 50 years ago. Nobody ever thought to google the name before now? Whatever. I know you're not supposed to think too hard about crappy horror movies.

I think this would have worked better without any of the explicit supernatural elements. They honestly felt out of place with the rest of the narrative. One spoon too many in the pot. All we needed was Moseley being a delusional serial killer cop, and an open-to-interpretation ending where Brit could have been possessed by the spirit of Natty Knocks or simply just traumatized by what happened. Also, by failing to vindicate Natty as an innocent washed-up actress who was demonized by her neighbors after they fucking lynched her, you're kind of making a statement about full-service sex workers.

I really did think Englund would have a larger role. Before I went in, I assumed he was the eponymous Natty Knocks and that he was the man-behind-the-man for Moseley's serial killing. But I guess they really did bring Freddy Krueger himself into the cast just to be a rando real estate agent. I mean, I guess it's supposed to be like a meta reference considering Natty was also burned to death by an angry mob and became an evil ghost.