#Sammi fe

[freddys-sweet-treat-circus]

WELCOME TO YOUR FINAL DESTINATION

It's been years since F.I.N. Engineering crashed and burned as a corporation and no one has heard a word from them since. But you, our new protagonist, know that the aftermath of their deeds still lingers. Their old headquarters still stands, sealed off from the public. Keeping whatever is inside a secret from the world. But you know what's in there, and you are determined to finally burn away the suffering that F.I.N. Engineering has left inside those walls.

For years, F.I.N. Engineering has been creating absurd experiments to further develop their AI. This resulted in a plethora of experimental animatronics never seen by the public eye. Only a few remain active, and you need to survive them if you want to put an end to this.

Good luck, stranger!

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Thank you for supporting F.I.N. Engineering©! We strive to bring you a better future, and what better time for the future, then now.

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Only a few more redraws left and I will have redone this entire au! Thanks for sticking around 💚

[decideroffate]

I just want to keep FemAlear's hair in a ponytail permanently... She looks friggin' cute with her hair up!

[onyxedskies]

“i know you probably hate me right now, and i get it.”

Give me pain my friend

i love hurting the faerghus four, something something they grew up together and so they know how to hurt each other the best

characters: sylvain, felix

word count: 284

It had been a long time since he'd fucked up this badly.

"You probably hate me right now, and I get it," Sylvain said, hoping Felix could hear him through the door, "but-"

The door opened.

"There is no fucking but," Felix spat. scowling as he looked Sylvain up and down. "I do hate you right now, Sylvain. This wasn't just some nobody that you hurt in your stupid, ill-thought-out attempts to hurt yourself and prove your family that Miklan was right about you. This is Ingrid, Sylvain, the one fucking person that stuck with you all along without complaining for anything more than your wellbeing. Of course I hate you right now. You'll be lucky if I stop."

Sylvain opened his mouth, trying to think of something to say. There was nothing to say, and he knew it, but he needed to defend himself.

"And don't fucking apologize. No amount of grovelling will bring her back. No - you lost her for all of us, Sylvain." Was it just the light, or were Felix's eyes slightly watery? "When someone chooses sides in a war, there's no coming back from that. She knew that. She threw away her dreams of knighthood because she wanted to get away from you."

Sylvain swallowed, closing his eyes and inhaling, trying to steady himself. Felix was right, and they both knew it. There was no getting around that.

"Get out of my sight," Felix said before slamming the door to his dorm. Sylvain stood in the hallway, hands by his sides, shoulders dropped.

He was right. This wasn't just some nobody. This wasn't just a random commoner girl who he'd likely never see again.

But he couldn't apologize, either.

[adhdvane]

finished getting katoru to 120 last night but have to wait on gw to get the last valor badges for his 130... realized i had enough rusted bows fully uncapped so i could get tweyen’s 110 out of the way (since i originally had planned to do her before four anyways sdlkjfhsk)

[currymanganese]

GUYS, I CAN'T ACTUALLY BELIEVE I'M SAYING THIS, BUT WHAT IF THEY ACTUALLY HAD A GOOD REASON FOR JOHN CENA BEING CAST AS SAMMY FAK?

please bear with me (pun intended) and let me know what you think of my speculation under the cut~

In a mind-boggling case of a seemingly big-lipped alligator moment in season 3 - John Cena appears in a bizarrely over the top (even by the tonal comedic standards set previously by The Bear e.g. Ecto Cooler punch at a kid's birthday party getting spiked with Xanax in Season One) and jarring scene that stretches on and on as he obnoxiously squabbles, blathers and exchanges nonsensical rapid-fire quips with his brothers Neil and Ted Fak as they buff polish The Bear's dining area before a food photographer from The Chicago Tribune arrives to take a photo for a review of The Bear.

In this scene, he also intimidates and threatens to 'haunt' (in a Fak family tradition ( that even the Faks find annoying) - that involves pranking and being an unrestrained nuisance to their loved ones especially when they least expect it) his brother Ted for, "stealing his SD cards"......

This scene and the increased screen presence of the seemingly plot-irrelevant Faks this season is currently being eviscerated by plenty of fans and critics alike.

Edit:

I now strongly suspect that John Cena's role was always in the works ever since S1

..................................

But what if there's a (debatable, but) really good reason for this scene and the increased involvement in Seasons 2 and 3 of the massive numbered siblings family of Carmy's pseudo cousins, the Faks?

See Exhibit A:

In season 2, episode 3, Sundae - after Carmy has already asked Sydney out to Kasama, a husband and wife owned restaurant run by Tim Flores, and Genie Kwon*, ostensibly just to brainstorm and gain inspiration for planning for the new menu, and after Sydney has already gone home and freshened up and changed her clothes, then arrived to Kasama early, despite the meeting only being scheduled for an hour after she last spoke to Carmy at his apartment, Claire calls and interrupts the whole hypothetical shebang with Syd and Carmy at Kasama (the Tagalog WORD FOR TOGETHER) with the words,

"Did you mean to give me a fake number? You do know that I know your entire family [translation: she must know Donna too and Claire assumes that Carmy's folks approve of her - and she's proven to be technically right throughout Seasons 2 and 3 ], right? And I know ALL the Faks! [translation: tee hee! they're bigger than you - to quote Neil and Ted with their Uncle, "We Faks do have a particular shape, don't we?😇" - and they outnumber you, you scrawny punk, slay!😉✨]"

Claire then proceeds to playfully threaten to have said "massive numbered siblings" Faks, which includes Sammy Fak, played by John Cena (a professional wrestler, from an industry that is mixes both bawdy over the top theatre, a performance art that values Kayfabe (legerdemain/slight of hand anyone?) and comedy, and an athletic discipline) that is TALL. BUILT. HENCH. AND BUFF AF.....Claire 'playfully' threatens to have THESE FAKS, beat up Carmy, who is short in stature and cannot fight well from all the previous physical confrontations we've seen him be involved in, despite supposedly being a former high-school wrestler, and who has already been seriously physically abused thrice in the series run thus far (not counting him play fighting or trying to fight with Richie) after being JUMPED by a GROUP of assailants, not once, but TWICE in season one, by the Ballbreaker nerds in the pilot, and the Bachelor Party attendees in the season finale (the first season started and ended with Carmy being beaten tf up, Holy Shit! 🤯); AND AFTER BEING SLAPPED IN THE FACE IN SEASON 2 BY HIS OWN MOTHER, DONNA.

Notice the way Carmy goes from being lost in his thoughts but being completely relaxed after his menu planning session with Sydney, and in anticipation of seeing her on their would be inspiration seeking meet-up (definitely not a date, no Sir! 👀) at Kasama, to being tense and jittery and apprehensive when Claire calls him (after going behind his back and getting his number from Fak).

Notice the way Carmy's voice shakes when he asks Claire if she really knows all of the Faks.....

Notice Carmy's defeated and annoyed reaction after he hangs up the phone.

No wonder Carmy is being so avoidant and conflict averse in his handling of Claire in both Season Two and Three, he has absolutely no faith in himself or his loved ones at present to defend himself should he assert the type of boundaries he may have been desiring to have with them for these past two seasons, after all - who can he count on to fully have his back even to the point of physically intervening for him if he gets into a scrape or is genuinely attacked, by the Faks on account of Claire taking offense at or misrepresenting his words and actions to them, e.g. Claire apparently twisting Carmy's self loathing stream of consciousness confession (that she eavesdropped on) and telling Tiff that they broke up because Carmy said that "Claire will ruin everything good for him?" while he was trapped in the fridge?

What if Carmy knows he has to rip the band-aid and call Claire and apologize for his part in the superficiality and disintegration of their dalliance, but is afraid to do so because he knows in so doing, if he is being fully honest with himself and with Claire, he never truly wanted to be with her in the first place?

And who knows how Claire will take that revelation - it probably won't be pretty will it?

And.....

to quote Neil Fak,

"Claire's the best."

"We love Claire."

"I did that." [setting Carmy and Claire up in Pop)

And.....

Claire. knows. all. the. Faks.....

TL;DR

They cast John Cena as Sammy Fak, and the Faks had a lot of screen-time this season because they are the physical manifestation of being haunted in their family's sense of the word:

and a satirical visualization of Carmy's desire for Syd being cock-blocked ; plus Claire is a Love-able Alpha Bitch, and Carmy is ambivalent towards her, and even a little scared to face her, because her henchmen are the Faks!

If you enjoyed this post, then thank you for reading and I'd recommend that you check out the following meta on the way Christopher Storer and Company have seemingly (and controversially) committed to sticking to the bit of lying to the audience and breaking the fourth wall throughout this entire season:

Richie and the viewer - by @whenmemorydies with my add-on in the reblogs about Richie, not Carmy, potentially being Christopher Storer's author avatar in this series (from a post originally written before season 3 premiered.

Fourth Wall being broken - by @brokenwinebox and @thoughtfulchaos773

Claire being a possible representation of addiction, being a habit that is hard to kick - by @thoughtfulchaos773 and my and @devisrina 's add-on speculating that Claire may also be meant to be interpreted or revealed as a bit of a mean girl, to reference TVTropes, she (and by extension Season 3) may be a deconstruction/ mashup /send-up / subversion of the: Girl Next Door, the Cute Bookworm, Nerds Are Sexy, MPDG, Yandere, Alpha Bitch, Loveable Apha Bitch, Childhood Friend Romance, High-School Sweethearts, Sickeningly Sweethearts, Getting Crap Past The Radar, Freeze Frame Bonus, Parental Bonus, Viewers Are Geniuses, Give Geeks A Chance, Even Nerds Have Standards, Beauty Equals Goodness, Face-Heel Turn, Cerebus Syndrome tropes etc.....and a subtler mirror version of Donna Berzatto.

Edit: See my reblog add on to @espumado 's thread on the recurrent 'haunting' theme this season and the possibility of the Claire x Carmy x Sydney love triangle being a Lilith x Adam x Eve allegory, and my webweaving about Syd x Carmy's Adam and Eve parallels. sidenote: Lilith is Adam's first wife apocryphally and in Jewish mysticism that left him, and became a she-demon / mother of demons after being impregnated by the archangel Samael - wait is 'Sammy' Fak a Samael allegory?!!

and another reblog add-on of mine to the thread linked above - on The Faks as the living embodiment of all that is fake in Carmy's life, C Storer's handy dandy tools for slight of hand,

you can't spell fake without FAK.

and please see

Clairecarmy as Ann Veal x GOB from Arrested Development

and with Richie's frustrated refrain of, "Who cares?!" whenever Claire and Claire and Carmy's breakup is brought up in 3 -

see the running gag of George Michael Bluth's (from Arrested Development) family's disdain for Ann and his relationship with her.

5. The parallels between The Bear and Burnt by @ambeauty - a post Season 2 post which was proven to be prescient and insightful given the Easter Egg inclusion of Bradley Cooper's character from Burnt on the photo wall of chefs at Ever in the Funeral dinner in the finale.

6. The parallels between The Bear and Boiling Point - a gritty film and mini-series set in a restaurant which features several plot elements and characters reminiscent of certain character archetypes and subplots present in The Bear - seriously think of this IP as The Bear's cynical, dramatic, older British cousin.

Decision to leave by @anderwater

This anon that recommended Boiling Point to me and wrote about its connections to The Bear.

The difference between The Bear and Boiling Point by @theblvckvenus

The similarities between The Bear and Boiling Point in this reblog add-on to @happylikeasadsong et. al's thread.

7. Claire/Carmy and the Walk In - my old post on the parallels between Strange Days (1995), Can't Hardly Wait (1998, and The Bear.

and @ambeauty 's meta on Claire as a representation of the fridge

8. My post on the possible connection between The Bear Season 3 and Andrei Tarkovsky's experimental, semi-autobiographical, psychological Oedipal drama film The Mirror (1975) - a film which was incredibly divisive upon its initial release, but has since gained wide acclaim and re-evaluation as a masterpiece, and that has had a legacy of subsequently inspiring multiple renowned filmmakers.

9. The Bear series' lead actress, and the director of Napkins, one of the only episodes of The Bear Season 3 to receive almost universal acclaim - Ayo Edebiri's trollish sense of humour and assertion that lying is the pinnacle of comedy.

10. And last but certainly not least with the inclusion of a Genie Kwon*'s, of Kasama fame, cameo in the season finale and the prominence of Kasama being key to Syd and Carmy's stymied relationship progression, courtesy Claire, see

The Kasama of it all by @gingerylangylang1979

@mod-doodles @lunasink @vacationship @chansoooo1-blog

@bioloyg @msmoiraine @nerdyblerd @ripley-stark @uncriticalbunny @prowitchazel @msmoiraine @mswyrr @anxietycroissant @turbulenthandholding @tvfantic87 @laryssamedeirss @tejidaepoque @angelica4equity @inalltheirgorgeouscolors @houseofevangelista @glitterslag

@uncriticalbunny @imliterallyjustablackgirl

@bioloyg and @ambeauty please don't say I told you so or welcome back, I'm flabbergasted that I wrote this, but I want to believe! 😭

P.S. If you're still reading this, do yourself a favour and read @brokenwinebox 's post

New Paradigm

and this follow up

Mocktail is a dirty word

and check out her #the magic trick tag!

and also check out these Sydcarmy and Rosalind x Orlando from Shakespeare's As You Like It parallels:

The Bear as a pastoral comedy

First Meetings

Fumbling with your crush

Separation, keepsakes and lovesickness

and also C Storer really did tell us in the music that this season would inspire

Mixed Emotions 🥴

[girls-alias]

Dean's Dream P9

Title: Dean's Dream Part 9

Words: 1,611

Relations: Dean Winchester X reader.

TW: Strong language

Req: @l7axr, @qinnroki, @deans-baby-momma, @angelofdarkness69

Part 8

Third-person POV:

Dean smiled, admiring Y/N's lips as she spoke, giggled or even listened to Sam. She was always smiling because she was in Dean's arms. Dean only came out of reality when Y/N whipped her head around to look at Dean confused. His eyebrows furrowed before rising, showing he wasn't listening and was not guilty of whatever accusatory thing was mentioned.

"What?" He asked innocently making Y/N chuckle, a sound he had missed and held close to his heart.

"Sammy was saying we went to the same dinner on May 3rd," She explained, filling him in on the conversation. He looked at her amazed, a slight chuckle leaving his lips. Her smile beamed at him.

"We were sat next to a hideous cherry painting," Dean chuckled, remembering how the cherry painting stood out to him as it seemed ugly and yet hypnotizing. He watched as Y/N's face grew bewildered.

"So did I," She explained, Dean's dropped open slightly as he wondered about a thousand things.

"Did you go to the bathroom and leave your book on the table?" He asked making me confused but also amazed as she recognised where the story was going. She confirmed excitedly. "I was sat right behind you," He explained, she chuckled as she shook her head. "If I had just turned around we would have seen each other," He explained with a chuckle, their hearts seemed to break a little at his words. It was almost synchronised. They both held sad smiles but smiled honestly when they recognised it on each other's faces. They both leaned in, meeting to kiss. It was a kiss of solidarity and comfort, something they both needed.

The conversation grew lighter as Dean smacked his brother's arm calling him an idiot for not pointing her out. They all laughed, knowing it was ridiculous but it appeared as though life was ridiculous to them too. As the food settled, the topic of conversation was what now? The air seemed to thicken as they all knew the conversation could end badly. Dean's chest seemed to tighten thinking the fairytale would end here and now. There seemed to be a silence surrounding them. Y/N turned completely in her seating position to face Dean. Something, in their dream life they often did to have a one-to-one conversation even in a crowded room. Even though Dean had not experienced this when he was in the dream, his body seemed to remember and understand. He turned his shoulders, facing her as she smiled worriedly.

"I know you hunt monsters and things but I would fall off the edge of the Earth for you if that's what you needed," She began to explain, Dean's smile grew at her words as he went to speak. "Please just let me," She interrupted sincerely. He nodded, closing his mouth and listening. Something the onlooking Sam was confused by. He could hardly get Dean to listen never mind shut up. He was amazed and enthralled, wanting to study her and learn her ways. "My life is miserable and if you will both have me I will come with you, I will learn to be an asset, I will do whatever it takes," She explained, pouring her heart into her words but worrying she sounded too desperate but as Dean smiled, she knew he didn't share her belief of being desperate.

"I'll stay with you while we're on this hunt then we'll take you to the bunker, it's pretty much our home between cases." He explained, admiring her for all she was. Perfection. The piece of him, he was missing. Her smile beamed before she kissed him, confirming she was happy with his words and the plan. She pulled away, admiring him closer before taking a deep breath and turning to Sam. She smiled warmly at him but also sympathetically. Sam waited a little worried about why he was brought into the conversation.

"Sam, you're welcome to stay with me as well. When the case is done we'll look at if you're okay with me coming along. I don't want you to feel like I'll hold you back or that it's a bad idea." She explained thoughtfully. Sam's eyebrows quivered slightly as he smiled, he could already tell she had a big heart. "If at the end of that time you're not 100% on board then we will work it out from there but whatever your answer is we will not judge you or change our feelings for you. It is a life the both of you have already built and I don't want to come in the way of that in any way or form," She explained, smiling softly as he grinned, chuckling softly as she finished.

"I can tell already I want you around," He commented, she sighed softly, relieved by his answer.

"We'll get your final answer before you leave," She explained making him smile so that even if he did change his mind she wouldn't hold it against him or take it personally. "You want me to show you to my apartment?" She asked them both, smiling as she noticed the smirking Dean. She chuckled as she shook her head.

They started climbing out of the booth, Dean offering his hand to help her stand although she didn't need it. She accepted his hand anyway. It was simply an excuse for him to hold her hand, which he continued to do as they walked out. They walked around the diner, chit-chatting slightly about the town as Dean was already looking for food recommendations later. She smiled, indulging him in the information, pointing out the places she remembered simply because she knew Dean would love them. Sam had thought it was a heartwarming gesture as he knew it was her subconscious way of saying I Love You without words.

"This is why you're perfect," Dean chimed in. Seemingly loving that she was excited to try a takeaway place that had the meatiest and greasiest burgers he would like. Also commenting on how they do amazing pasta dishes and salads Sam would like. Dean put an arm over her shoulders and pulled her in to kiss the top of her head as they walked. She giggled as her steps fumbled slightly before resuming a normal rhythm.

They rounded the corner, the Impala in prime view of the car park. She gasped, rushing slightly to get to the car. She ran her hand over the hood. Amazed he actually had the car in the dream as she had wanted this car since she woke up. Dean smiled brightly at her excitement, approaching her as she was almost giddy. Sam chuckled a little confused but watched on, craving to see their interaction. It seemed surreal to Sam, he had never seen Dean this happy, gentle or loving.

"You actually have Baby," She gasped, smiling as she admired the car and Dean admired her. Sam admires the scene.

"Make and model," He prompted, a chuckle escaping her lips.

"1967 Chevy Impala," She explained as if it was hardwired into her brain. Her smile never faded. Dean grinned somehow recalling a time when he had made her learn everything about the car before he would let her drive it. Although he wasn't present in the dream then he seemed to know it like a distant memory. Like he had a short dream about it months ago and had simply forgotten it. He studied her expression as he pulled the keys from his pocket. She grinned, studying him slightly but as he smiled she knew he was letting her drive. She squealed, rushing to embrace Dean as he chuckled. Sam watched on, shock overloading his system. It took him ages for Dean to let him drive. Sam reminded himself that they had not just met a few hours ago and that it was weird circumstances, something he assumed he would be used to by now in this line of work. She bounced slightly as she pulled away from the hug accepting the keys from Dean and turned to Sam, her smile beaming excitedly. "Are you okay if I drive?" She asked Sam. He chuckled noticing she was hiding some excitement in case he wasn't comfortable with it.

"If Dean trusts you to drive I won't argue," Sam chuckled slightly. Holding his hands up to show he wasn't putting up a fight. She squealed excitedly before quickly kissing Dean. Sam opened the back door, crouching into the car. She smirked as she looked at Sam's closing door, a mischievous look filling her eyes. Dean smirked, his recognition of her emotions and intents still sharp.

"You probably won't remember but we had sex in and on this car," She tempted, her tone and words making Dean's mouth dry. His mind flooded as he either remembered or imagined the times. She smirked as she walked around to the driver's door.

Dean admired her the whole time she was driving, his mind was often distracted by his thoughts of her but he wiped them away. She drove them to her apartment block, inviting them into her home. They walked in, happy to be somewhere more private but a little more bare. Sam tried to hide his slightly sad smile as he looked around. It was less homely than the bunker. She simply had all she needed, there weren't any real luxuries or anything sentimental. Dean barely cared where he was as long as he was with her. They could be in hell, and he could be tortured for decades again but as long as she was okay and offering him the heartwarming smile that healed his heart, he would be happy.

Masterlist

Working On

I know @l7axr requested a smut. That will be Part 10 and skippable for those of you know don't like smut.

[creedslove]

A bit late but imagine Joel has to take the kiddos trick or treating alone because you’re sick in bed

Feel free if boy or girl or both

I imagine he wouldn’t cut the night short for the kids’ sake but that he’d constantly send you pics and text to see how you’re doing and just be anxious to be home to take care of you

No outbreak!Joel Miller x f!reader

A/N: I changed a little bit because now Halloween is gone honey ❤️

• your toddler Rosie and your stepdaughter Sarah spent the whole week nagging you and Joel to go to the amusement park that got in the city about a week before

• it was both cute and annoying as it was the only thing the girls could talk about and your baby boy Sammy was also super excited even if he didn't understand it exactly what was going on, he just giggled and cooed at his big sisters' excitement

• your household had made so many comments about it that you began feeling excited as well, and you four just decided to go on Friday evening, which Joel promised he would take it off and take his family to the park, and eventually, all the Millers were looking forward to Friday night

• that until Sammy woke up with a fever and a runny nose; which you didn't worry at first, medicating him just like the doctor had advised you to and carrying on with your tasks

• but through the day, Sammy didn't get better, quite the opposite, he cried and whined and sniffled and you felt so sorry for your baby because you didn't want him feeling ill

• until mid afternoon you noticed you sniffled a little too much, at the same time you felt shivers and suddenly, you were just as sick as Sammy was

• when the girls realized you were both sick, they immediately got anxious, at the same time they didn't want to pass up the opportunity to go, but they also worried about the two of you and decided to wait for Joel to get home and figure what to do

• when your husband Joel saw how sick you and your baby boy really were, he felt both disappointed and worried; he didn't want to cancel on the girls but he didn't want to leave you

"I know the girls are gonna be disappointed, but I'll buy some pizza and ice cream cake and put on their favorite movies, you know how much they love ice cream cake, don't ya? Anyway, we'll stay in to take care of you and Sammy and we can go some other day"

"no Joel.. take the girls, they've been waiting for it the whole week, Sammy and I will be fine, we just need a night in to rest and recover.. we'll both have some chicken soup, a warm bath and some snuggles and we'll be alright tomorrow"

• you insisted because you wanted your family to have fun, Sammy was too little to enjoy the park anyway, and even if Joel felt a little guilty and upset, he agreed, immediately cheering up at how happy Sarah and Rosie were

• you made you and your one-year-old some chicken and vegetables soup and you both cuddle on the couch, under some warm blankets and watched some quiet TV

• one part of Joel was having fun, while the other was just anxious to get home and take care of you; he worried about you both and kept texting you and sending you pictures of their evening

• Joel bought some popcorn, corn dogs and cotton candy to go; he wanted you to have them, knowing how you often loved those snacks

• he also made sure to win you a stuffed shark; he said it was for you, but in reality it was for Sammy, nonetheless, he knew the two of you would snuggle it as soon as you saw it

• when the three of them got home, he found you and Sammy asleep, his heart clenching with love as he couldn't explain how much he loved his family and you, because you were the one who gifted him it

• during the weekend, he was all the time all over you and Sammy, making sure you both were alright, and when you two were fully recovered by Sunday, he suggested going to the amusement park again

• the girls cheered so excitedly and nodded, as now you all went as a family; you had fun, snapped pictures and Joel even held Sammy so you could go on a few rides

• it ended up being such a lovely evening and it brought you so many good memories you were sure you'd relish for the rest of your life

____

[dalekofchaos]

Michael Afton:Accomplice/Killer Mike au

So after looking at these three fanarts on the subject. I've come up with a FNAF au where Mike is William's accomplice.

Fanart 1. Fanart 2. Fanart 3

It starts after the Bite of 83. William sees potential in Mike.

Instead of letting Mike be arrested, William saves Mike and pins the blame on Bonnie bully(Jeremy)

William pulls what he did with Susie.

"He's not really dead, son. Help me and we can put him back together." Mike at first is hesitant. But he just wants to make it right and bring his brother back.

It starts out with William doing the killings and Michael cleaning up the evidence. The police never begin to suspect a thing. Mike is the suspicious one due to his connection to the Bite of 83, but because of lack of evidence, no one ever charges either father or son.

Eventually, Mike has to lure and kill some kids to prove to William how committed he really is. William helps Mike by making a Springlock Foxy costume to help blend in to Pirate's Cove. Mike performs as his hero and his symbolic fall of grace. After every Pirate's Cove performance, Mike lures them to the safe room.

It starts by luring them so William can kill them. But one day, Mike is locked in there with the kids.

"Oh it's far too late to back out now, help me or I swear I will tell the police what you did to your brother and I will pin all those little disappearances on you."

Mike kills his first victim. He uses Foxy's hook for a weapon and he does the deed. 5 more dead kids.

"You've done it. Well done, Mikey! I'm proud of you, son! We're gonna do great things together"

All the remorse and regret he's felt is washed away by finally making his father proud. The one thing he's wanted all his life is finally his and together they will bring Evan and Elizabeth back and put their family back together.

Throughout the years they would kill together. Not only kill together, but make Fazbear Entertainment and Afton Robotics bigger and better than before.

There is one setback however. Jeremy has returned. He took the night guard position and because of the Puppet's visions, he knows too much. So Mike hacks Mangle and causes the Bite of 87. "...I'm sorry Jeremy. I had to. I did it for my family!"

Because of William and Mike openly working together, Elizabeth knows it's Mike and Circus Baby even helps Mike make a makeshift Springlock version of Funtime Foxy so he can slip in and out to capture children.

Although Mike loves Funtime Foxy, he just can't help but continue to use Classic Foxy to lure the kids at the old Pizzeria. Because a true classic never goes out of style!

Mike is officially the new head of security. Everyone sees this as a "nepo hire" but Mike is just so charming and manipulative that FE eats out of his hand. He can easily ensure that the kids go missing without a trace. When security officers get too close to the truth, then Mike wears his old Foxy mask, gets the hook and goes through the vents and kills them.

"Save them"

"You can't"

Now who could be the protagonist now that Mike is William's right hand?

Sammy Emily. In this au Henry is not a deadbeat dad to his son. They grieve together over Charlie and when Sammy is grown up, Sammy fills Mike's role as the security guard.

Charlie even helps Sammy. When Sammy gets jumpscared by The Puppet, all he hears is "Sammy, it's me. Charlie"

One day Mike and William return to the decaying and dilapidated Freddy Fazbear's Pizza to get more remnant.

Sammy, Charlie and the MCI work together and corner William and Mike.

William gets springlocked via the rain and Sammy and Charlie work together to cause Mike's springlock.

Sammy in Fazbear Frights is being hunted by Springtrap and Foxtrap

In the attempt to free Elizabeth and the funtimes, Sammy is scooped.

After the fire. Scraptrap, Foxscrap and Circus Baby come together. Lefty tries to stop them, but because of the suit and calls she can't stop herself from hurting Sammy.

Henry's speech happens. The fire happens. But Sammy survives.

Sammy has a daughter named Vanessa.

As Vanessa works for Fazbear and the VR game. She sees a bunny....and a Fox.

One day a boy named Gregory plays and sees the Fox. To Michael, Gregory is Evan reborn.

They found their new Elizabeth while getting revenge on Sammy & Henry and Michael found Evan Reborn. The Afton Family is put back together.

Mike would orchestrate a Glamrock Foxy to be built. William becomes Burntrap and Vanessa is Vanny while Gregory is Dr Rabbit.

However, a ghost from Mike's past survived. Jeremy returns. as a VR tester and as the Pizzaplex technician.

Instead of "What makes you so special" it's "Why are you STILL ALIVE?"

Cassie enters the picture. In this case, she's not looking for Gregory. She's looking for her father.

Jeremy and Cassie will do whatever it takes to stop the Aftons, even if Jeremy has to become one with the remains of Glamrock Bonnie.

[fangirlingfromdownunder]

Comfort in a Wish

Summary - Part 17 in the Comfort series

Pairing - Dean Winchester x Reader, Reader x Sam (platonic), Reader x Bobby (father-figure)

Warnings - mentions of miscarriage, mentions of drowning

Series Masterlist | Masterlist

A/N - G’day guys, I just wanna start by thanking you for all the likes, reblogs and follows since my last post, I really appreciate it. I hope you like this one too. And remember my inbox is always open for requests or even if you just wanna chat. Until next week, enjoy! 

“Hey, what’s a pretty girl like you doing all alone out here upset?” 

You look up to see who’s talking to you: it’s a tall man, probably around Dean’s height, he’s bald with tribal-style tattoos running up his neck and over his head and face. You offer him a weak smile and mutter out an excuse, “Rough call with my fiance, that’s all. I should get inside.”

“Sorry about that. Here let me help,” the man says as he offers you his hand. As he stretches out his arm you can see there are tattoos running up his arm too. Against your better judgement, you take his hand and let him help you up. As your hand touches yours, his tattoos and eyes glow bright blue and you black out.

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───

You wake up in a soft bed in an unfamiliar room. You roll over and come face-to-face with Dean, but he looks more relaxed than ever. As if he was lying there waiting for you to wake up he kisses you.

“Good morning, Sweetheart. How’d my girls sleep?”

“Girls?”

You feel him reach his hand down and rub it over your stomach, which you now notice is the size of a basketball. “You sleep so well you forget about all the grief this little one’s been giving you?”

“Oh yeah, best I’ve slept in a long time,” you lie. 

“That’s good to hear. I was thinking how about I finally put the cot back together today? You’ve been riding me about it for weeks and you’re right, she’s gonna be here before we know it. But I finally have a day off and I’m gonna make it all about my girls.”

“A day off? Right, from hunting…”

“Are you still in your dreams, sweetie? A day off from the garage. I haven’t hunted in years, not since before Sammy jr was born.”

Just as he says that a little boy that perfectly resembles his father runs in and jumps on your bed. “Mama! Dada! Morning!”

“Good morning, champ! How about we go make Mama some breakfast?”

“Yeah!”

Dean gives you a quick peck on the lips before getting up and picking up the small child and carrying him out of the room while they laugh the whole time. The sight warms your heart, this is your ultimate dream but you can’t help but feel like something is wrong. You stand up and walk around the room looking for anything that could give you more information about your situation. You find a photo album in the cupboard as you flick through the pages you see photos of you and Dean standing in a field – you in a fancy white dress and him in a black suit with a white bow tie – with your arms around each other and the widest smiles on your faces. That’s when you notice the rings on your finger, one is familiar but the simple white gold band that sits above it is new. As you keep flicking through the album you see various photos of you with a gradually growing belly and then there are photos of you and Dean in a delivery room holding an infant who you can only assume is the boy downstairs with his father now. As you finish flicking through the book the absence of some very important people stands out to you. You put the album back on the shelf and pull on a dressing gown and join the boys downstairs. 

“Hey, honey, I was thinking maybe we should invite Sam and Bobby over for dinner before the baby’s born.”

Dean stops whisking and rounds the bench putting his hands on your forearms. “The baby brain’s bad today…I just never thought you’d be able to forget that…” You stare at him blankly so he continues, “They’re gone, baby. They sacrificed themselves so we could get out remember? This better not be a prank, it’s not funny. You know how guilty I feel and how much I miss them.”

“I’m really sorry, Dean,” you hang your head feeling bad for upsetting him, “I didn’t mean to upset you. I don’t know where my memories at today.”

“It’s okay, it’s the baby. You were like this with Sammy jr too, maybe not this bad but you always forgot where you put anything. It’s part of the process, it will all be worth it when she’s in our arms.”

He kisses your cheek and goes back to the kitchen where the toddler is making a mess of the ingredients. You smile weakly at the mess and walk out of the room. You find an office off the kitchen and go in and sit at the desk in front of the big desktop computer. When you turn it on you’re met with a photo of you, Dean and Sammy jr all smiling in a park. You open the internet browser and start searching for any demonic omens or strange occurrences recently. There’s none. The last signs you can find are from four years ago. You find articles talking about a range of apocalypse-level disasters that came and miraculously cleared within a few months. You’re interrupted from your research when you feel tapping on your leg. 

“Mama, breakfast ready.”

“Thank you, uh, Sammy. I’ll come out in a second.”

“You okay, mama?”

“Yeah, baby, I’m okay. Let’s go have some of that yummy breakfast you and daddy cooked.” You shut off the computer, stand up and pick up the toddler by your side. He starts laughing as you carry him with you to the kitchen where Dean’s serving out three plates of pancakes and bacon. 

“That smells amazing, honey. What do you think little guy?”

“Yeah, smells yummy!” he laughs out as you place him on the stool at the kitchen island. He starts happily eating the pancakes that Dean sliced into bite-sized pieces for him. You take a seat beside him and start eating in an attempt to appear normal to them. Dean rounds the counter and takes a seat next to you rubbing your back before digging into his own breakfast. As you eat you look over at the boy and man next to you; this is your dream, so why does it feel so wrong? 

Once you finish eating you get up to do the dishes but Dean stops you and takes your plate. “Nope, I got this. You go rest.”

“You cooked, I can’t sit around and do nothing.”

“You’re eight months pregnant, yes you can. Plus, you always do so much for us, so today while I’m home you’re not to lift a finger. You can take a nice long bath, catch up on that book you’ve been complaining you haven’t had time to read, watch a movie, whatever you want. Today is about you. So you go relax, I’ll tidy up here, build the crib and then I’ll take Junior to the park and wear him out so we can have a quiet afternoon on the couch, where I’m gonna give you the best foot massage of your life.” You open your mouth to protest but he stops you with a kiss, “No excuses, go relax.”

Defeated you go sit on the couch. You surf through the channels absentmindedly. This is the treatment you’re used to – Dean taking over and telling you to rest, although his reaction to you bringing up Sam and Bobby concerns you. Generally, whenever you bring up a lost one it ends in a fight. Where’s the arguing that’s always been such a significant part of your relationship? And how can Sam be gone? You were just with him in Illinois on a hunt. And you were at Bobby’s house days ago. The sinking feeling in your stomach grows.

Moments later you’re stripped from your thoughts. “Mama, can we watch cartoons? Scooby please?”

“Uh…sure, honey.” You flick through the channels looking for the cartoon channel. As soon as you find it Sammy jr climbs up on the couch beside you and snuggles into your side intently watching the TV. You run your fingers through his short brown hair and down his back. “You know, your daddy used to like Scooby Doo. I didn’t know him then but I’ve heard stories of when he was a kid, a few years older than you, he used to love watching this show. His favourite was Daphne, who’s your favourite?”

“I like Scooby!”

“Yeah, Scooby’s great.”

Dean comes in and joins you, sitting beside Sammy Jr. “Oooh, Scooby-Doo. I know we just had breakfast but I brought you two some snacks. I’m gonna go upstairs and put that cot together, you enjoy,” he says as he hands you a bowl of assorted fruits all cut into shapes. He places a kiss on Sammy’s head and then gets up and goes upstairs. 

Just over an hour later Dean returns downstairs and sits down beside you and Sammy jr. “The cot’s all done, the nursery is ready for our little girl,” he says as he rubs your massive tummy. “I’ve also run you a warm bubble bath so you can go relax while I take this one to the P A R K to wear him out.”

“You’re the best husband ever. There’s no way you’re real.”

“One hundred per cent real and all yours, baby. You enjoy your relaxing bath and we’ll be back soon. Come on, Bud, do you wanna come on an adventure with Daddy?”

“Yeah! ‘Venture!”

“Alright, go upstairs and I’ll help you get ready for our adventure.”

The little boy jumps up and bounds up the stairs. Dean stands up and helps you up slowly, leading you to your shared ensuite. When you walk in you’re met with an overwhelming scent of roses and the flickering lights of candles. He helps you undress and get into the tub. Once you’re settled he kisses your lips softly and stands up to find the little boy. 

You let the warm water and relaxing scent wash over you. Before long you hear the door open and shut downstairs, after that, your mind wanders back to your earlier thoughts. An image of the blue light and tattoos flashes in your mind. 

“Son of a bitch! It was a djinn!”

Knowing the best way to save yourself from a djinn is to kill yourself in the dream world to wake up, you pull your head underwater. You let all the air out from your lungs. Your throat and chest start to burn, your lungs screaming at you to pull up for air. You squeeze your eyes shut and try to push through the pain needing to return to the real world; to your real Sam and Dean. You want this dream so badly, but not at the expense of Sam and Bobby. You’re determined to find another way to escape without losing them. The burning in your lungs grows as you fight against it. You start to feel your pulse slow as you struggle to control your mind.

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───

Tag list: (Leave a like or comment on this post or let me know below if you want to be added to the tag list for this series)

@bitchwitch1981, @muhahaha303, @justrealizedimmascifygurl, @mcdowell-123, @leigh70, @marvelsmarauder, @losa12308, @tapedeck-hearts, @luvjaida, @peachtxa, @ambearsstuff, @shadow-of-a-cloud, @slut-for-buck, @iprobablyshipit91, @sassy-pelican

[miss-madness67]

Advent Calendar 2022: Day 3 (Dean)

Christmases with the love of your life, Dean Winchester.

Hop in for 25 days of Christmas and fluff.

Day 2

You’re 17 years old when someone breaks your heart. Since you now officially live with your uncle, you’ve started to make Sioux Falls your home and Bobby your family. The process, of course, required you to enroll in high school. You whined to him, obviously, that school was unnecessary for a future hunter like you, but he had none of it and your school experience in South Dakota began. With it, you met him; Roman. He was handsome and smooth-mannered, every girl’s dream and every parent’s nightmare. Long story short: you fell deep, and he broke you. It had been a superficial relationship, a school romance, but it hurt, and your best friend Dean was there to hear all about it.

“I’m telling you,” his voice is soft through the phone’s speaker, “it was the right call that you didn’t say anything about your family. Dude wasn’t worth it.”

“Ugh, don’t even remind me, what was I thinking? What was I going to say?” In a mocking tone, you add, “hey, I come from a family of monster hunters, my father killed himself and my mother became a drunk that can’t even pay attention to her daughter, so now I live with someone else!” You chuckle humorlessly, “what a joke, no wonder he ended it, who wants a fucking mess?”

Dean’s voice hardens on the other line, “hey! hey! Don’t say that. It’s his loss, he’s the one who screwed up.”

“And yet, I’m the one with the broken heart.” Dean starts to protest on the other end of the line, but you really don’t want to hear it. “Let’s just talk about something else. Are you really not coming this Christmas.”

It’s the morning before the 25th, he’s clearly not coming, so you’re really not surprised when he answers. “No, dad has a case in here in Santa Fe, and he isn’t done. Sammy and I will be spending the holidays eating frozen turkey meals in the motel…” The conversation progresses for the rest of the hour, and for a little while, you forget about your broken heart.

Day 4

Tags: @sweetwerewolfqueen @unabashed-lover-of-fictional-men @perpetualabsurdity @deanswaywardgirl @seppys-return-to-madness @desimarie12 @hobby27 @mrspeacem1nusone @fluff-lover @melannie77

[ka1rosnan]

꧁-Fortaleza en el sufrimiento-꧂

9 abr 2018

La Biblia en un año: 1 Samuel 10–12; Lucas 9:37-62

Cuando Sammy, de dieciocho años, recibió a Jesús como Salvador, su familia, de una fe diferente, lo rechazó…da clic aquí para leer todo, gracias.

👇🏾

https://iglesiakayros.es.tl/

Shalom!

[decideroffate]

I can't believe it happened again...

[deadcactuswalking]

REVIEWING THE CHARTS: 06/04/2024 (Beyoncé's COWBOY CARTER)

Welp, as one would expect, she gets the double, the #1 album with COWBOY CARTER and “TEXAS HOLD ‘EM” is back up top. Welcome back to REVIEWING THE CHARTS!

Rundown

As always, we shall start with our notable dropouts - songs exiting the UK Top 75, which is what I cover, after five weeks in the chart or a peak in the top 40 - and this week, we bid adieu to some big deals: “FRI(END)S” by V (more BTS on the way), “BURN” by Hitler and Goebbels, “Coal” by Dylan Gossett, “Grey” by Yung Filly, “Selfish” by Justin Timberlake, “redrum” by 21 Savage, “Nothing Matters” by The Last Dinner Party, “Strangers” by Kenya Grace and finally, “Escapism.” by RAYE featuring 070 Shake.

As for our returns, we see “Flowers” by Miley Cyrus and “Someone You Loved” by Lewis Capaldi back to bottom-dwell at #75 and #74, alongside “vampire” by Olivia Rodrigo at #71, “Everywhere” by Fleetwood Mac, they’re basically all in the same boat. Notable gains on the other hand… we see boosts for “Anti-Hero” by Taylor Swift at #67, “if u think i’m pretty” by Artemas at #52, “FE!N” by Travis Scott featuring Playboi Carti at #50, “Never be Lonely” by Jax Jones and Zoe Wees at #41, sigh, “Been Like This” by Meghan Trainor and T-Pain at #40, SIGH, “Evergreen” by Richy Mitch & the Coal Miners at #38, “Slow it Down” by Benson Boone at #27 (likely even further next week thanks to the album), “Happier” by The Blessed Madonna and Clementine Douglas at #26, “Back on 74” by Jungle at #25 (what a great new run this is having), “Belong Together” by Mark Ambor at #22, and finally, Artemas gets his first top 10 with “i like the way you kiss me”. I mean, at least it’s interesting.

Now our top five should look pretty familiar: “we can’t be friends (wait for your love)” by Ariana Grande at #5, “Too Sweet” by Hozier at #4, “Lose Control” by Teddy Swims at #2 and of course Bey knocks Benjamin Boonerang off the #1 to #2 with “Beautiful Things”. Now to talk about - let’s be real - Beyoncé and some minor cameos.

New Entries

#64 - “NEURON” - j-hope, Gaeko and YOON MIRAE

Produced by Pdogg

So, j-hope of BTS released an album - or it seems more like a mixtape - that landed at #38 on the albums chart thanks to the classic BTS sales. Whilst there doesn’t appear to be a clear single on the project, especially considering j-hope was always more of a rapper in the group, but this got the video treatment and is very much what I expect from j-hope, at least from the very little I’ve heard of his solo work. It’s got a set of blissful pads against a vocoder sample and surprisingly heavy-hitting boom bap drums, as well as sing-songy rap flows in a nasal, almost J. Cole-like delivery that could be about love but keep it vaguer in the verse, it might be more conscious and spiritual, especially considering the focus on neuron activation. Gaeko is a lot more explicitly introspective, looking back on his life and how he’s not as aggressive as he used to be in his youth, finding more solace in playing ball with his son that “embracing the bomb” - some of the Genius translation could miss out some detail or context here. Now YOON MIRAE, a female rapper, really brings the heat here, as the intensity of the pianos ramp up, the beat gets a tad more minimal and she raps bilingually in a deeper yell than either of the guys here can cough up. She speaks somewhat generically of the rap game and motivation to grind, but her riffing on the final chorus is what convinces me, as well as her acknowledging that she’s granted the beat drop in the song, it shows an awareness of the structure of the song and not just being a guest rap verse, it’s clever and interesting, really puts the verse into perspective. So I ended up really liking this - it’s a bit fluffy, as K-pop often is, but it’s got grit and meaning to it this time around, and with the variety in flows, focused content, I can dig this.

#62 - “Jump” - Tyla, Gunna and Skillibeng

Produced by Sammy Sosa

I quite liked Tyla’s self-titled debut, currently at #33 on the albums chart. The South African singer brings a reassuring, youthful joy to detailed production and it’s all a light, feathery bliss that’s just a delight to sit through, even if the record is clearly not for sitting. I have a full first-impressions review on my RateYourMusic listening log (the account is exclusivelytopostown) if you want more thoughts on that, but my favourite moments on the album are when guest features with a little more smolder are brought in to balance the sweetness, like with Tems on “No. 1” and with Gunna and Jamaican deejay Skillibeng on this track, “Jump”, which has a subtle sprinkling of Afrobeats guitars and keys over the very unsubtle rhythm section, a great deep bass and busy drums that can counter the choir vocals in the verses as well as Tyla belting a tad on the chorus. There’s little substance to it - it’s just about being hot and having fun, with a hilariously repetitive post-chorus, but both Tyla and Gunna shout out her native Johannesburg and if you were expecting anything of further depth, you’re just listening to the wrong album. This is a lot of fun and I hope it catches on.

#61 - “I LUV IT” - Camila Cabello featuring Playboi Carti

Produced by El Guincho and Jasper Harris

Sometimes I wish this show was a video series. For this entry, I would probably just point and laugh at the calculated attempt to be interesting, for a demographic I’m a part of, and failing so catacylismically that no-one is buying it or bothering to listen more than once. I don’t mean to be harsh, and I’m not blaming the artists, more so the label and marketing teams: when releasing a pop single, you first have to consider - who is this for? Who can you appeal to and how? Here, Camila has her own fanbase already, so she’s going to try and appeal to them, naturally. Also, it has a very edgy, cinematic video for fans of say, The Weeknd or people who watch Euphoria. Sure, okay, that could work. Oh, and the song sounds like Charli XCX - though she recruited ROSALÍA’s producer - so she’s trying to appeal to her hyperpop crowd, that’s fine, you’re stretching yourself a bit thin there though, it could be a bit too camp for the edgy crowd if you do that, and a bit too dark for the hyperpop crowd if you get Playboi Carti on board, because I guess she needs a rap crossover audience… or at least an experimental rap crossover audience in this case. At least she’s not using a nostalgia-bait sample of a Gucci Mane song from… oh, she’s using a nostalgia-bait sample of a Gucci Mane song from 2009. Okay, so I guess the target demographic is everyone now, but hyperpop fans like authenticity, and this clearly doesn’t have it. Carti fans hate women, Camila’s own fans, if her old comments are anything to go by, hate… “rappers”, let’s say that. And really, what person who would be nostalgic for Gucci’s “Lemonade” - never charted here, by the way - would even be keeping an eye out for Camila Cabello? This is just a travesty of a lead single… and the song’s brilliant, all of that context just makes what the eventual end product is completely hilarious.

I’ve always been an advocate for mess in pop music - not necessarily the discourse, but the music itself and the rollout surrounding it - because it is exciting and part of the reason I do this show. There are more fascinating stories to be told with music when it reaches a mass audience, it’s just natural, and that’s especially interesting when the song is a Goddamn trainwreck that’s catchy as sin and does everything wrong. There are rage synths that don’t last the entire measure for no reason - and they don’t try and hide it - whilst the synths on the chorus play the role of a theremin. Cabello not being able to sing all that well means that her playing staccato, hyperpop robo-girl over a pretty rote Jersey club groove actually goes really well for her, even if she inexplicably decorates the song in breathy ad-libs as if she herself was Playboi Carti. Speaking of ad-libs, they leave in Gucci’s original “brr”s in the chorus, seemingly out of either laziness or refusal to re-record the choir hook, and given both hooks are just mantras, there are basically two choruses instead of an active chorus/post-chorus dynamic, especially since there is no considerable change sonically or tonally between the two. This lack of structure culminates in a “bridge” that is JUST multi-tracked ad-libs, and features Cabello saying “slow down, baby”… the tempo remains the same entirely and the drums don’t go into half-time like they probably should for a Playboi Carti feature. He goes for his deep, richer voice and the song just kind of… ends with his verse? Barely catching up to the beat, Carti rambles as usual, even less coherent in his mumbling than usual, and eventually, Cabello tries to insert herself into his orbit, it’s so painful. It’s telling that when I search for this song on Spotify, the artists recommended to me are Carti, Charli and then Ken Carson and Lancey Foux. Camila herself is nowhere to be seen in that list of artists and whether that’s because there’s none of her personality in this song or she didn’t have any to begin with is a question for another day. For now, this is garbage. I love it.

#60 - “Outside of Love” - Becky Hill

Produced by PARISI

Now Becky Hill kind of has something to prove to me now, she’s been on increasingly better production that fits the places she wants to go with her voice a lot more as of recent and it’s been pretty promising. Also promising are PARISI, a duo who I mostly connect with Fred again.. but have also worked extensively with Ed Sheeran, and particularly on some of his most interestingly layered songs vocally like “Afterglow” and “Visiting Hours” which may be a coincidence but had me really excited for what the boys could do with Ms. Hill. Turns out it probably was a coincidence, the vocal mixing is kind of mediocre actually, they don’t really contain her belting very well, not that it really needs containing given this is fully in festival mode. Everytrinkling synth pad, house kick, it feels like it’s a constant light fluttering under Hill’s desperate attempt to jigsaw this relationship back together. I know it’s an EDM-pop track so the lyrics are little to write home about but it should still be said that the description of herself as on the “outside of love” is interesting imagery, it makes me wonder what could be done with that concept by a more poetic writer who has a bit more time and, let’s be real, a fitting sonic palette for that kind of lyricism. Whilst this hasn’t immediately clicked with me as much as the past two, I feel I’ll appreciate this one for just being a maximalist bop with terribly-mixed gospel-like vocals on the final drop, it goes for an onslaught of everything in a very admirable way. It’s cute, it reminds me of when 2000s Eurodance hits would go way harder than they needed to simply to raise the dramatic stakes. So yeah, another Becky Hill song I like. World’s crumbling.

#9 - “II MOST WANTED” - Beyoncé and Miley Cyrus

Produced by Beyoncé, Shawn Everett, Michael Pollack, Miley Cyrus and Jonathan Rado

So, there’s a Beyoncé album, I think? It’s got a country and western tinge to it. Heard it’s long, heard it’s pretty good. Haven’t heard it. I probably will not listen to it and I’m not saying that to be “cool” or contrarian because if I were, I’d have listened to it and pretended to hate it. Realistically, I don’t have a dog in the Beyoncé does country argument. I’m not a country fan, or a country hater, I’m not a big Beyoncé fan, or Azealia Banks, so I have nothing valuable to contribute to the discourse as well as no reason to hear a damn near feature-length record. When Beyoncé did house, firstly, she did it well, and secondly, I’m a fan of house music! I know more about it than other genres, I’m quite educated in certain subgenres and I recognised a few of the samples and cultural references she was lifting from on RENAISSANCE. I feel like most of them may be lost on me or not fully resonate when discussing her pivot to country music, and I wish that wasn’t the case. Part of me just wants to say that I listen to Weezer and future bass so leave me alone. Thankfully, the British public has given me the easiest plate of two tracks from this album: a Dolly Parton cover and a mid Miley duet. It’s about being a ride-or-die, it’s got soaring guitars and both ladies have an audible rasp and grit to their voices, even if Miley ends up like a backing vocalist at times to Bey. They’re trading lyrics or in harmony nearly all the time, and Miley plays it a lot calmer than Bey, naturally, who probably wants and needs to prove herself in country pop more than the seasoned player. Hell, I actually think their chemistry here is awkward and not accentuated by the vague western-soundfont lyrics that don’t play into any notable angle, and in the bridge, just kind of give up on themselves. It’s a bit disappointing, to say the least.

#8 - “JOLENE” - Beyoncé

Produced by Beyoncé, Khirye Tyler, Jack Ro and NOVA WAV

Dolly Parton’s iconic 1973 jam “Jolene”, begging desperately for this beautiful woman not to cheat on her husband, is pretty undeniable, right? Well, I’ve never really liked it, sorry to say. My taste in country is pretty horrific, I’ll be the first to admit, but I’ve always found the instrumentation underwhelming and going for sinister when Dolly is selling it with a long of strength and desperacy, like she’s at her last tether. The sapphic elements are compelling of course, but they collapse in the third verse, then it fades out having sonically done nothing much at all. There’s always been something breezy about it to me that I never really understood, and that’s no disrespect to Dolly, she’s easily my favourite part. Regardless, this is one of those times where I have to give a chart history, so flashback to 1976, when “Jolene” first lands on the UK charts and peaks at #7, when “Combine Harvester” by the Wurzels was #1. I know that one because of my dad, if you haven’t heard that song… you know what, don’t.

“Jolene” was Dolly’s first top 10 over here and ended up re-entering a few times in the 2010s. Before that came many re-imaginings. First, in 1985, we had Glasgow’s Strawberry Switchblade cover the song, in a weird mix of new wave, freestyle and western elements that really show what performative country aesthetics can be, because this has more to do with darkwave than anything from the Deep South. It peaked at #53 and it is terrible. The 2000s is where the covers really ramped up, firstly in 2000 with the #100-peaking cover by London alt-rock outfit Queenadreena. Seemingly not on streaming, it came with their original, “Pretty Polly”, and fully goes into the dark cabaret aesthetic, especially in that... choice of a music video. I think I might prefer it to the original, it makes Jolene sound like an evil woman who I would like to step on me. We also saw a #99 peak for a song in 2007 by folk singer Ray LaMontagne also coincidentally called “Jolene” - it’s not a cover, but it’s a pretty great, tragic narrative ballad if you’re interested. Good accidental discovery to make. My favourite cover of “Jolene”, however, and the only version to get close to Dolly’s original peak until Queen Bey was the version recorded by the garage rock duo, The White Stripes, specifically a 2004 live version that peaked at #16. Now, am I biased because I love Jack White? Yes. Yes, I am, and so does Beyoncé, so shush. Everyone and their mother has covered Dolly, but out of all “Jolene” renditions I’ve heard, Jack just sounds the most devastated, and the eventual crash into distorted, hapless guitars and Meg White’s ugly-ass snares after that rushed, chaotic percussion panned exclusively to the left throughout, is incredibly cathartic. And that’s just the studio version - the live version that charted is even more dire and Jack is downright pathetic on it, worsened by the audience wooing, cheering and clapping on occasion, it eggs on Jolene in a way and publicises his angst “Jolene - Live Under Blackpool Lights” might honestly be one of the greatest cover songs of all time.

So how does Beyoncé fare? Well, she changes a lot of the lyrics to act more as a warning to people attempting to take JAY-Z instead of desperately begging Jolene not to get with JAY-Z, mostly because I don’t think Beyoncé could easily sell being helpless, especially in the context of her husband - we all heard Lemonade. I’m not sure how effectively you can sell the warning shot either considering, well, there was a Becky with some good hair who did all of this a few years ago. Sonically, I’m not head over heels for what sounds like a pretty rote rendition, even if Beyoncé’s vocals and some of the lyrics add a lot of character that simply isn’t in the instrumental. The backing vocal repeating “Jolene” at sporadic intervals, I can’t figure out exactly who it is, probably The-Dream, but he reminds me of Wyclef Jean on “Hips Don’t Lie”. That’s my intellectual observation. I just used a review of a song from the biggest black female country album ever to talk about a guy whose last name is literally White. When she releases a pop punk album, I’ll be more in tune, but for now, leave it to Azealia Banks and Spectrum Pulse, I’m sure if you combined the two, you’d create Frankenstein’s cultural critic.

Conclusion

Fascinatingly enough, this was a great week outside of Beyoncé, who takes away Worst of the Week for “II MOST WANTED” with Miley Cyrus and the Dishonourable Mention for her cover of “JOLENE”. Neither song are terrible, but I think I established in both reviews that my general disinterest for the album doesn’t entirely cover a lot of the flaws I believe are present in these tracks, I’m sorry. Again, I like Beyoncé, just not these particular records. As for the best… oh, God, it’s Camila Cabello’s “I LUV IT” featuring Playboi Carti, isn’t it? Honourable Mention goes to Tyla, Gunna and Skillibeng for “Jump” but I think I’ll have to spend a few days in rehab recovering from picking the other song as my Best of the Week. As for what’s on the horizon, more insufferable discourse as J. Cole drops a surprise diss record. Other than that, Charli XCX links with Gesaffelstein, Benson links with Boone and there’s new tracks from Bryson Tiller, Ava Max and the Imagine Dragons. All of it could chart, none of it could chart, we’ll see. For now, however, thank you for reading, long live Cola Boyy, and I’ll see you next week!

[dudeshusband]

sharing 10 songs and tagging 10 people

tagged by @isabelinlove

1. on the atchison, topeka, and the santa fe - bing crosby

2. rio bravo - dean martin

3. my guy - mary wells

4. why do fools fall in love - frankie lymon and the teenagers

5. something's gotta give - sammy davis jr

6. i fall to pieces - patsy cline

7. "murder" he says - dinah shore

8. la bamba - ritchie valens

9. everyday - buddy holly

10. you send me - sam cooke

@connor-roys @amessageonthewind @seventimesround @friezaforce @rose-wine-selfships @jocelynships @deaths @wardeningosbeloved @hippoships @overtly-affictionate

[tahitiwoke]

five times kissed bc i didnt send it to you but i suppose its my time to be hurt

ONE | HE WAS A GIANT.

" it's all the in the back swing, slugger, " phil says with a laugh, readjusting roman's grip on the sammy sosa wooden bat - it's pint size, one he had to get at a walmart because the ones he had at home were practically the size of roman himself. the boy pulls his arms back and tries for a practice swing, one-two-three times, and with a fresh determination, adjusts the yankees cap phil had pushed onto his head before they got to the cages.

like this? " yeah, just like that. come on, now, chin up. focus and don't dare look away, 'cause that's what gets you -- taking your eye off the ball. " from the other side of the batting cage, carol whoops and shouts go roman! and shoots phil a wink. he's a good kid they tell each other at night when he's gone to bed. he's a good kid with a good head on his shoulders and he's got a hell of a life stretching out in front of him.

there's a long break before the next ball flies out the ejector and a longer pause between the shunk of the piston, and the crack of roman's bat finding leather. naturally, phil goes wild. " that's what i'm talking about! " they applaud obnoxiously and phil kisses the top of his head, ruffling his hair.

TWO | WICHITA LINEMAN.

things go wrong. it is the nature of the beast, it is what happens to people like them in this job and maria tells him this was always going to be the risk, that if anything were to go wrong, it may as well be now when nobody is in too deep. are you in too deep? i heard he's living with you. but phil knows now what he didn't before: he can't live without roman.

when maria mentions transferring roman into someone else's caseload, he grabs her wrist, keeps his voice low so as not to wake the sleeping boy in the hospital bed that looks so obscenely large next to his tiny frame. if you take him away from me, i'll burn your fucking house to the ground. he's my boy. the pause had been volatile. had been hard to process, for both of them, but when he let go, she had nodded. okay, she had said with an oddly proud look on her face, okay. get some sleep, coulson, you look like shit.

he waits until she's gone before he turns back and kisses roman's forehead, careful not to jostle any of the wires attached to him; when he sinks back into the too-small, shitty uncomfortable plastic chair, he opens a book and starts to read.

THREE | EVERYTHING ALL THE TIME.

she's not coming back, is she? roman stands in the threshold of the bedroom doorway, looking into the dim light cast by the bedside light; phil is awake with a report scattered over the duvet - not a usual move, but the living room still has a lot of boxes from the move, both his things and roman's - so needs must. he looks over at roman, over his glasses. he's always been a precocious kid. he's always been a good kid -- thirteen years old and already half a man.

a sigh pushes out between them, phil rubbing at the frown cutting into his own forehead. " no, slugger. she's not. " there must be some sort of sadness, some heaviness that he has not managed to cover quick enough because roman pads into the room then, in his pyjamas that look a little smaller than they did last week. (they'll go shopping tomorrow. he'll get him new clothes, and they'll have ice cream and he'll say to the waiter my son was wondering if you had the chocolate milkshakes again?) it is careful the way he puts his hand on phil's shoulder, but in a strange moment, he's almost the caretaker -- roman leans over and presses a kiss to phil's forehead. it's okay, dad.

FOUR | COURAGE, MY BOY.

jess watches the young man on the edge of the wellwishers carefully; he's hung far enough back, stood beside a red-head she doesn't recognise, that it shouldn't really draw her attention as much as it does, but the utterly devastated look on his face catches her breath. it's a deep sorrow - the kind she feels herself, in some small way. her brother was not the most forthcoming person. never mentioned friends or girlfriends -- or boyfriends? no, it doesn't seem the grief of a lover. it looks... christ, it looks like the grief of a son.

(that makes her baulk, makes her immediately dismiss the idea. because phil would have told her, surely, and their mother if he had a son. he would have mentioned it.)

somebody presses a folded flag into her mother's hands and says we thank your brother for his dedication to his country -- fucking steve rogers shakes her hand when he says it. she does not know what phil did for a living but it seems overwhelmingly important with the sad, sorrow filled face of captain america staring over at the white stone marker. the boy she'd been watching - twenty-ish maybe, she thinks - steps up to that marker after the priest disappears kisses his fingertips, pressing them lightly against the front, just above the words chiselled into it.

PHILLIP J. COULSON. FRIEND, BROTHER, SON. THE RIGHTEOUS SHALL GO INTO ETERNAL LIFE.

FIVE | ONE SMALL VICTORY.

phil is running a little late -- he doesn't mean to be and he texts roman to say he's on his way as soon as he leaves the office, apologises for the delay and that dinner is his treat. that he cannot wait to meet the mystery girl. he's so eager, in fact, to get into the restaurant that he even tosses the keys to the valet with a cheerful don't scratch it, chief and takes the steps two at a time upstairs to where the hostess had told him they've been seated.

the girl is facing away from him and carol forces a smile when he walks in, but roman stands. roman stands and hugs him and phil kisses his temple, " hey, slugger, sorry i'm late, i had a nightmare at the office -- "

phil turns then, to greet the girl and say hello and has his mouth open to introduce himself but -- he knows the face. he knows the exact shade and shape of the girl in front of him and she looks equally thrown off, looks slightly nauseas when roman says josephine, this is my dad, phil.

[fiftytwotwentythree]

Wellness Wednesday:

Cleaning Out My Closet Fridge

Part of my wellness journey is working on my financial wellness - What are my spending habits? What can I do differently? What can I cut out?

Couple weeks ago I challenged myself to use up as much as groceries/pantry supplies before buying more groceries - maybe meal prep here and there.

Well, I've been doing good on clearing out the freezer - working on the fridge and pantry now.

I noticed I had an abundance of deli meat and breads laying around - so - I was very conscious about eating up those foods first before they went bad.

To be honest I was little more conscious this week because not too long ago I had entire loaf of bread get moldy and I just despise when that happens.

So - I at a ton of sammies this week. Really spiced it up by changing my breads, meats, and cheeses - never got boring.

Other added benefit - I saw significant drop on my weekly grocery bill. A practice I want to entertain more in the future.

Another step to help out my pocket book is I made the decision not to buy any more expensive nuts - aka - my Wonderful's Pistachios. I am going to see if I can find a more cost effective snack alternative... Plus, I still have plenty to finish off in my cabinets.

Beyond my wallet and weekly diet - I broke the 2 week plateau streak and hit some weight loss (slightly over 4 pounds). Felt good considering I didn't do anything besides partake in some extra deli meats.

Sleep-wise - man-oh-man - I need to sleep. I hate how this is a constant battle.

Socially - saw some fam - good times/stories/jokes - and - tomorrow I plan on seeing some good friends at the movies... and hope to enjoy said movies.

.

.

24th CHECK-IN:

Current Goals:

Lose 52 lbs

Completed as of 4/12/2023

New Goal: Maintain or Continue on The Weight Loss Path

Avoid "Junk Food"

Minimize Take-Out / Fast Food Consumption

Short Term:

Vegetarian-ish Diet: Completed

End Date: 4/09/2023 - 46 Days Total

.

.

Meal Tracker:

THURSDAY

Lunch:

(1) Hot Ham & Swiss on a Burger Bun

(1) Turkey Swiss on a Burger Bun

Handful of Good & Gather's Tex Mex Trail Mix

Snack:

Bag of BBQ Corn Nuts

Supper:

(1) Hot Ham & Swiss on a Burger Bun

(1) Turkey Swiss on a Burger Bun

(2) Triangle Wedges of Watermelon

(1) Glass of Milk

FRIDAY

Lunch:

(1) Turkey Swiss on a Burger Bun

(1) Chicken and American Cheese on Burger Bun

Bag of BBQ Corn Nuts

Snack:

(1) Old Wisconsin Turkey Sausage & Cheddar Cheese Stick Combo

Supper:

(2) Chicken and American Cheese Sandwiches on Sesame Seed Buns

(1) Triangle Wedge of Watermelon

Bag of Orville Redenbacher Ultimate Butter Popcorn

SATURDAY

Lunch:

(2) Chicken and American Cheese Sandwiches on Sesame Seed Buns

Bag BBQ Corn Nuts

Snack:

Handful of Good & Gather's Tex Mex Trail Mix

Bag of Smartfoods White Cheddar Popcorn

Supper:

(1) Pineapple Brat on a Bakery Bun

- Ketchup

(1) Taco Brat on a Bakery Bun

- Ketchup

(1) Grilled Potato

(1) Glass of Chocolate Milk

SUNDAY

Lunch:

Cesaer Salad

Snack:

Bag of Smartfoods White Cheddar Popcorn

Bag of Orville Redenbacher Ultimate Butter Popcorn

(1) Glass of Chocolate Milk

Supper:

Chef Salad

(1) Medium Orange

MONDAY

Lunch:

Santa Fe Style Salad

Handful of Wonderful's Smokey BBQ Pistachios

Supper:

Chef Salad

(1) Medium Orange

TUESDAY

Lunch:

Santa Fe Style Salad

Handful of Wonderful's Salt & Vinegar Pistachios

Supper:

(1) Homemade Oven-Baked Ham, Pastrami, Chicken Swiss Slider on a Artesian Bun

(1) Medium Orange

WEDNESDAY

Lunch:

(3) Leftover Homemade Oven-Baked Ham, Pastrami, Chicken Pepperjack Sliders on a Artesian Buns

Supper:

(3) Leftover Homemade Oven-Baked Ham, Pastrami, Chicken Pepperjack Sliders on a Artesian Buns

(2) Glass of Chocolate Milk

(1) Medium Orange

Bag of Orville Redenbacher Ultimate Butter Popcorn

.

.

Workouts:

THURSDAY

(200) Jumping Jacks [4 sets of 50]

(100) Glute Bridges [4 sets of 25]

(100) Push-Ups [10 sets of 10]

(100) Assisted Push-Ups [2 sets of 50]

(50) Reverse Leg Lifts [5 sets of 10]

(50) Leg Kickbacks [5 sets of 10]

(100) Sit-Ups [5 sets of 20]

FRIDAY

(200) Jumping Jacks [4 sets of 50]

(100) Glute Bridges [4 sets of 25]

(100) Push-Ups [10 sets of 10]

(100) Assisted Push-Ups [2 sets of 50]

(50) Reverse Leg Lifts [5 sets of 10]

(50) Leg Kickbacks [5 sets of 10]

(5 min) Planks [5 sets of 1 min]

SATURDAY

(200) Jumping Jacks [4 sets of 50]

(100) Glute Bridges [4 sets of 25]

(100) Push-Ups [10 sets of 10]

(100) Assisted Push-Ups [2 sets of 50]

(50) Reverse Leg Lifts [5 sets of 10]

(50) Leg Kickbacks [5 sets of 10]

(100) Sit-Ups [5 sets of 20]

SUNDAY

(200) Jumping Jacks [4 sets of 50]

(100) Glute Bridges [4 sets of 25]

(100) Push-Ups [10 sets of 10]

(100) Assisted Push-Ups [2 sets of 50]

(50) Reverse Leg Lifts [5 sets of 10]

(50) Leg Kickbacks [5 sets of 10]

(5 min) Planks [5 sets of 1 min]

MONDAY

(200) Jumping Jacks [4 sets of 50]

(100) Glute Bridges [4 sets of 25]

(100) Push-Ups [10 sets of 10]

(100) Assisted Push-Ups [2 Sets of 50]

(50) Reverse Leg Lifts [5 sets of 10]

(50) Leg Kickbacks [5 sets of 10]

(100) Sit-Ups [5 sets of 20]

TUESDAY

(200) Jumping Jacks [4 sets of 50]

(100) Glute Bridges [4 sets of 25]

(100) Push-Ups [5 sets of 10]

(100) Assisted Push-Ups [2 sets of 50]

(50) Reverse Leg Lifts [5 sets of 10]

(50) Leg Kickbacks [5 sets of 10]

(5 min) Planks [5 sets of 1 min]

WEDNESDAY

(200) Jumping Jacks [4 sets of 50]

(100) Glute Bridges[4 sets of 25]

(100) Push-Ups [10 sets of 10]

(100) Assisted Push-Ups [2 Sets of 50]

(50) Reverse Leg Lifts [5 sets of 10]

(50) Leg Kickbacks [5 sets of 10]

(100) Sit-Ups [5 sets of 20]

.

.

WEIGHT TRACKER:

Starting Weight (Noon, 1/01/2023): XXX.X lbs

Weight at Last Check-In, 6/07/2023: ZERO lbs

Weight As of Noon, 6/14/2023: -4.4 lbs

Total Weight Loss: -69.8 lbs

.

.

Closing Thoughts:

The Good:

Coming off a 2 week plateau and losing over 4 pounds. Nice little bump - but - still aware another plateau can surdace.

The Bad:

I've had some tad off days at work.

The Ugly:

Feel like a broken record - but - I am jonesing for some good ol' fashion sleep.