#Same sex romances

[aro-bird]

Here's me begging people again to learn the difference because I've been seeing more and more people confuse these terms when discussing some things in the ace community:

Sex-Favorable - A descriptor that refers to a person's personal feelings about engaging in the act of sex that specifically refers to them being fine and even enthusiastic in engaging in sex and other sexual acts. Often confused by some as Sex-Positivity.

Sex-Positive - A moral or political position that refers to a positive outlook on sex as something positive and something that should not be shamed for any consenting persons regardless of their own personal feelings towards sexual acts on themselves.

Sex-Indifferent - A descriptor that refers to a person's personal feelings about engaging in the act of sex that specifically refers to them being indifferent in engaging in sex and other sexual acts.

Sex-Neutral - A moral or political position that refers to an indifferent outlook on sex. They may not have strong feelings about it one way or another.

Sex-Averse - A descriptor that refers to a person's personal feelings about engaging in the act of sex that specifically refers to them being averse in engaging in sex and other sexual acts. Often confused by some as sex-repulsion.

Sex-Repulsed - A descriptor that refers to a person's personal feelings about engaging in the act of sex that specifically refers to them being repulsed or disgusted by thoughts or material related to sex. This has no bearing on their own political/moral position on sex. Often confused by some as Sex-Aversion or even Sex-Negativity.

Sex-Negative - A moral or political position that refers to a negative view on sex as something negative and something that should be forbidden and only be a means of procreation. Some people who are sex-negative may only view it as a way to procreate so people who engage in the activity without any plans of procreation (and especially members of the queer community) may be deemed as immoral or even evil.

If we're going to have proper discussions of these things, please please please can we use the proper terms. I need to stop feeling fight or flight whenever I see someone trying to vent about "some rude sex-positive aces" or see someone proclaim that they're "sex-negative" like I'm serious. I keep on having to double-take whenever I have to read posts and discussions because of this.

[agrebel18]

saw someone on here the other day say that we don’t need aromantic and asexual representation in media because that’s a “sanitized” identity like BITCH WHAT????? IF YOU CAN ONLY SEE ASPEC PEOPLE AS CHILDREN THAT IS A YOU PROBLEM.

[magneticrestarea]

Love is love ❤️

[fizpup]

valentine, you're a horse ❤️

[lilmerh]

Any other aroallos annoyed by sex being viewed as shallow, loveless, not fuelled by "pure" emotions - just lustful, for your own pleasure - when that description is much more true for my romance?

Out of all of the attractions I feel (platonic, familial, sexual, etc) my romantic feelings are the most shallow and fleeting. It bothers me when romance is described as an inherently superior, deeper, and more pure form of attraction. That does not reign true to me at all!!

I love familially, I love platonically, and I love sexually. I love deeply and intensely. It bothers me when all that is overlooked because I happen to not love romantically enough.

No form of attraction is inherently purer or more valuable than another.

(I'm not shallow for experiencing sexual attraction nor heartless for not experiencing romantic attraction, thank you.)

[eyelinerandmcr]

something i love about gerard way is that you're always going to find out some new freaky thing about him no matter how long youve been in the fandom. like for example i just read an article where he said he enjoys a guy grabbing his ass but it depends on how they grab it

[carlarosenakilah]

The more you think about it they're quite similar

[maelancoli]

i feel like 'who talks like that' mentality has harmed unique dialogue in books ngl?? like we need to let our characters have their own way of talking, let them be a little melodramatic. the written word often requires flowery speech and sharing sentiments in a way real people don't because we cannot convey the micro expressions, the atmosphere, the little visual cues—all that modern media allows. you have to be willing to be a little cringe if you want your characters to stand out and feel earnest and real

[save-the-data]

The Untamed | S01E22

Chinese Drama - 2019, 50 episodes

Episodes | Viki | YouTube | Netflix | WeTV | Tencent | Prime | Catalogue

[transfagore]

I've seen someone say that aplatonic people should seek psychological help because they've faced difficulties making friends in the past and improved after undergoing treatment. Well, a few points:

1. Your experience is not universal

2. I can't form friendships because I get bored and apathetic very quickly. And I have no desire to make friends. Like, not a little bit. Aplatonicity isn't just "having difficulty in making friends" (although an aplatonic person may have this experience, aplatonic people are diverse)

3. There are people who don't feel platonic attraction but have friendships (just like feeling sexual attraction ≠ liking to have sex, feeling platonic attraction ≠ like making friends)

4. Not every neurodivergent person who cannot form friendships seeks or will be able to "get better"

5. Your experience is not universal

[cosmicredcadet]

I'm tired of repulsed "positivity" posts always having "but romance negativity is bad" tacked on, as if t comes along with repulsion. Because Repulsion positivity needs a disclaimer because we are always seen as being negative. it's always "Sex and romance repulsion is valid AS LONG AS you're not Sex negative ^^" never just "Sex and romance repulsion is valid." end of sentence.

this ALWAYS happens on repulsed posts. We are always paired with sex negativity. And Im so sick and fucking tired of it. You never see this on sex and romance favorable posts. you never see people tack on how favorable people shouldn't push toxic sex positivity and shame people for not having sex.

I do not care if you think repulsed people are "prone to being sex negative" that thought process alone SHOWS that you don't understand us and don't fully support us. I hate you. I'm tired. It's obvious you see us as less willing of support all because you assume we are sex negative, a sentiment that gets tacked onto us for simply expressing our repulsion. I hate you. I'm tired.

I'm tired.

I'm tired.

[wagnii]

[magneticrestarea]

“You said you were but three, but it appears to me we are four.”

Alexandre Dumas - The Three Musketeers

[read-write-thrive]

platonic and romantic are not some sort of binary that relationships have to be divided into. they’re not even two ends of a linear spectrum. they’re fully just abstract concepts made up of culturally-dependant social behaviour and expectations that are continually forced upon people to reinforce religious, legal, and broader societal/cultural norms, often and repeatedly to the detriment of non-normative groups including, but not limited to, the queer community. and I am sick and tired of those norms being replicated in fucking fandom discourse, of all places

[transneutrallaw]

Said it before and I'll say it again but instance on the hardcore splitting of aromantic & asexual does so much harm to people who’re both. Those who don’t experience any attraction whether they Identify specifically as aroace or just ace or aro are often left in the dust and treated like ignorant interlopers or "bad stereotypes" for daring to express ourselves.

It’s even more frustrating when people in the “community” pretend to be accepting of aroaces/non SAM Aces/aros…except not really because they’re quick to say how our identities/existence is “harmful/conflating/a stereotype”

Crazy that aroaces were here first we built the communities that seek discard us! In the early days Asexual was originally just used for people who didn’t experience sexual AND romantic attraction, it got adjusted to include alloaces. The aromantic lable only exists BECAUSE of aroaces creating a separation from alloaces.

I’m not particularly angry or upset that ace/aro are inclusive of a wider range of experiences, it’s just so fvcked how the very people who built up both communities are treated like trash, worthless embarrassing leeches that make the alloaces & alloaros look bad. Ffs there wouldn't even be a community to shunt people out of if it wasn’t for “aroaces”. But y'all aren't ready for that conversation.

And before y'all start, yes aro and ace are different but honestly if you're both no they really aren't. Tbh alloaces & alloaros, the only reason some of you insist they are just so completely different and have nothing to do with eachother is because you aren't both and you don't understand other ace/aro experiences and latch on hard/overemphasise your allo orientations. Because imagine how crazy it'll sound if people started insisting that "Bisexual" & "biromantic" are totally different and have absolutely no crossover or overlap whatsoever...you see how insane that would sound.

[andsorrowsend]

I think wwdits fans are some of the whiniest little bitches on the planet lmao you guys suck(not in either of the fun ways)