#Sales territory management

[fieldassistusa]

Leveraging Technology in Sales Territory Management: Tools and Platforms for Success

In today's competitive business landscape, effective sales territory management is crucial for maximizing sales performance and achieving sustainable growth. Technology plays a pivotal role in empowering sales teams to optimize their territories and drive results. This article explores the various tools and platforms available for sales territory management and how they can enhance productivity, efficiency, and collaboration. By leveraging technology, sales organizations can streamline operations, improve sales rep effectiveness, and ultimately achieve greater success in managing their territories.

1. CRM Systems for Territory Planning

Customer Relationship Management (CRM) systems serve as the foundation for effective Sales territory management. These platforms provide sales teams with a centralized database for storing customer information, sales data, and historical interactions. CRM systems enable sales managers to analyze customer profiles, buying patterns, and revenue potential to make informed decisions about territory assignments. They facilitate territory planning by visualizing customer locations and segmenting accounts based on criteria such as industry, size, or revenue potential. With robust CRM systems, sales organizations can create balanced and optimized territories that align with sales objectives and maximize revenue potential.

2. Geographic Information Systems (GIS) for Territory Mapping 

Geographic Information Systems (GIS) tools offer powerful mapping capabilities that enable sales teams to visualize and optimize their territories. GIS software allows sales managers to overlay customer data onto digital maps, providing a clear visual representation of territory boundaries, customer distribution, and market penetration. By leveraging GIS tools, sales organizations can identify gaps in territory coverage, pinpoint high-potential areas for expansion, and optimize sales rep routes for efficient travel and customer visits. GIS mapping also facilitates data-driven decision-making, enabling sales teams to allocate resources effectively and ensure balanced workload distribution across territories.

3. Sales Performance Analytics and Reporting Platforms 

Sales performance analytics and reporting platforms provide valuable insights for primary or secondary sales. These tools enable sales managers to track key performance indicators (KPIs), such as revenue, conversion rates, and quota attainment, at both the individual rep and territory levels. By analyzing performance metrics, sales leaders can identify top-performing territories, uncover trends, and allocate resources strategically. These platforms also allow sales managers to generate customized reports and dashboards, providing real-time visibility into territory performance and enabling data-driven decision-making. With access to accurate and timely performance data, sales organizations can proactively identify opportunities for improvement and take targeted actions to drive results.

4. Mobile Sales Enablement Apps for On-the-Go Productivity 

Mobile sales enablement apps empower sales reps to be productive and efficient while working in the field. These apps provide access to essential sales collateral, product information, pricing details, and customer data directly from mobile devices. Sales reps can quickly retrieve and share relevant materials during customer meetings, ensuring they have the most up-to-date information at their fingertips. Mobile sales enablement apps also offer features like CRM integration, order processing, and sales activity tracking, enabling reps to manage their territories effectively and stay organized while on the go. By leveraging these tools, sales teams can enhance customer engagement, improve productivity, and drive sales outcomes in real time.

5. Collaboration and Communication Platforms for Sales Teams

Effective collaboration and communication are crucial for successful sales territory management. Collaboration platforms, such as project management tools or team collaboration software, facilitate seamless communication, task assignment, and information sharing among sales team members. These platforms enable sales reps to collaborate on territory strategies, share best practices, and seek advice from colleagues, regardless of geographic location. Additionally, communication platforms like instant messaging apps or video conferencing tools foster real-time communication, ensuring that sales teams can stay connected and address territory-related issues promptly. By leveraging these collaboration and communication platforms, sales organizations can enhance teamwork, knowledge sharing, and overall efficiency within their sales teams.

Conclusion

Leveraging technology is essential for effective sales territory management in today's competitive business environment. Tools and platforms such as CRM systems, GIS mapping, sales performance analytics, mobile sales enablement apps, and collaboration platforms enable sales organizations to streamline operations, improve productivity, and drive success in managing sales territories. By embracing these technologies, sales teams can optimize territory planning, enhance data-driven decision-making, improve communication and collaboration, and ultimately achieve greater sales performance and revenue growth.

[spmtribe]

Mastering Sales Incentive Strategies: Harnessing Historical Data and AI for Market Success

In today's dynamic business landscape, crafting an effective sales incentive strategy is crucial for driving profitability and maintaining a competitive edge. A well-structured incentive plan not only motivates sales teams but also aligns their efforts with the organization’s broader goals. With the rise of advanced data analytics and artificial intelligence (AI), companies now have unparalleled tools to refine their sales incentive strategies. This article delves into how leveraging historical sales data and AI can revolutionize incentive planning and propel business outcomes to new heights.

The Bedrock of a Successful Sales Incentive Strategy

A sales incentive strategy is a carefully crafted framework that employs a mix of rewards and recognitions to spur sales teams towards achieving and surpassing their targets. These incentives can range from tangible financial rewards like bonuses and commissions to intangible non-financial perks such as career advancement opportunities and public acknowledgment. The core objective is to synchronize the sales force's efforts with the company's strategic goals, driving growth and ensuring profitability.

Leveraging Historical Sales Performance Data

Historical sales data is a goldmine of insights that can shape effective incentive strategies. Here’s how organizations can harness this data to fine-tune their sales incentive programs:

1. Uncovering Successful Sales Patterns

By delving into past sales data, companies can identify patterns and trends that have historically led to success. Recognizing what has worked well enables businesses to design incentive plans that replicate these triumphs.

Example: A consumer electronics company noticed that their sales peaked during the holiday season when sales teams emphasized bundle deals. Armed with this insight, they crafted an incentive program that rewarded reps for promoting bundled products during key holiday periods, leading to a 30% increase in seasonal sales.

2. Profiling Top Performers

Analyzing the behaviors and tactics of top-performing sales reps can provide invaluable insights into what drives success. By pinpointing common traits and strategies among high achievers, companies can shape their incentive programs to encourage these behaviors across their entire sales team.

Example: A B2B software company found that their top performers consistently excelled in closing deals with small to medium-sized enterprises (SMEs) by offering personalized service and flexible pricing. They rolled out an incentive scheme that rewarded reps for adopting similar approaches, resulting in a 40% boost in SME sales.

3. Segmenting the Sales Force

Sales teams are typically composed of individuals with diverse levels of experience, expertise, and motivations. Segmenting the sales force based on performance data allows for the creation of customized incentive programs tailored to different groups within the team. This ensures that each segment is motivated by incentives that resonate most with them.

Example: A pharmaceutical company divided its sales team into new hires, mid-level reps, and seasoned veterans. They developed tailored incentive programs for each group, offering training incentives for new hires, performance bonuses for mid-level reps, and market expansion rewards for veterans. This segmented approach enhanced overall team performance and morale.

Integrating AI for Advanced Incentive Strategies

Artificial Intelligence (AI) has transformed various business aspects, including sales performance management. Here's how AI can amplify sales incentive strategies:

1. Predictive Analytics for Anticipating Trends

AI can sift through vast amounts of historical data to predict future sales trends and outcomes. This capability allows organizations to proactively adjust their incentive strategies to align with anticipated market changes. AI-driven predictive analytics can forecast which products or services will be in demand, identify the most effective sales techniques, and uncover potential opportunities or risks.

Example: A retail company utilized AI to forecast a rising demand for eco-friendly products based on evolving consumer preferences. They recalibrated their incentive plans to offer higher commissions on green products, capturing a significant share of the growing market segment.

2. Personalizing Incentive Programs

AI can analyze individual sales reps' performance and preferences to tailor personalized incentive plans. This level of customization ensures that incentives align with each rep’s unique motivations, whether they are driven by financial rewards, career advancement opportunities, or other factors.

Example: A telecommunications firm used AI to understand their sales reps' preferences and career aspirations. They developed personalized incentive packages, offering higher bonuses for reps motivated by financial gain and leadership opportunities for those seeking career progression. This approach significantly improved overall sales team satisfaction and performance.

Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs)

1. How can AI assist in designing an effective sales incentive strategy?

AI assists in crafting effective sales incentive strategies by analyzing historical sales data, identifying successful patterns, and predicting future trends. It enables the creation of personalized incentive plans and facilitates real-time adjustments to align with evolving market conditions and sales team dynamics.

2. What types of data are most crucial for developing a sales incentive strategy?

Crucial data for developing a sales incentive strategy includes historical sales performance, customer demographics and behavior, market trends, and individual sales reps' performance metrics. This data provides insights into what drives sales success and how best to motivate the sales team.

[roberttaylorsewell]

Robert Taylor Sewell is a tenacious sales and business development professional, bringing over a decade of experience across diverse products, services, and industries to account and territory management roles.

[luvjunie]

— less is more

pairing: e-42!miles morales x fem!reader

contains: some tears, a little misunderstanding but a fluffy ending

summary: miles makes quite a bit of cash from his jobs, and with his love language being gift giving he often likes to spend a lot of it on you. however, you didn’t grow up with much, and this makes it especially hard for you to accept such expensive things from him without feeling overwhelmed. wc: 1,224

a/n: based off this request! some people might find this reader easier to relate to so i definitely wanted to write it

Gifts were something that came with the territory of dating Miles Morales. Big bouquets, flashy accessories, shopping sprees at the mall, and probably every single stuffed animal he’d ever caught you eyeing whenever the two of you went out. If you so much as looked at it, it was on your fire escape the next morning. At this point, you had so many on your bed that you were starting to run out of room to sleep.

And you knew he meant well, and you tried your best to enjoy it the way you imagined you should but it was all so foreign to you. Your life was much different before you met him, and it was more along the lines of nervously checking your bank account to see if you had enough cash to buy a five dollar starbucks drink to ‘treat yourself’, or if you’d have to wait till next week’s paycheck for blended coffee with some whipped cream on top.

Most of your clothes were hand-me-downs from your older siblings, or duds you’d secured from the Salvation Army a few blocks down on the colored-tag sale days, and that was the way you liked it. Humble beginnings is where you came from and humble was the way you intended to keep it.

So now as you stared down at the small jewelry box in your hands, Tiffany & Co embellishing the top in silvered letters, trepidation began coursing through you at the size of the box alone. Anything that came in a tiny package such as the one you were holding was bound to cost more than anything you’d ever managed to buy yourself. You realized you must have been lost in thought as you sat gawking at the untouched gift, because your boyfriend’s voice sounded like it was underwater the first few times he called out to you.

“Baby?”

“Hm?” You blinked, looking up at Miles from where you were seated on his bed to see him leaned against the wall, arms crossed.

“Go ‘head and open it, don’t leave me hanging.” Miles joked, brows bunched slightly in confusion.

“Oh— right,” you laughed half-heartedly. Swallowing hard, you gently pried the small box open with hesitant fingers to reveal the prettiest diamond necklace you think you’ve ever seen. Light glinting off the encrusted jewel, Miles waited with bated breath as he watched your hand tremble towards it, a choked inhale catching in your throat as you felt the weight of the pendant alone.

“Well?” he asked quietly.

“How much was this?” Your throat felt tight; uncomfortably so, like the air in the room suddenly wasn’t the kind you were meant to breathe.

Miles glanced to the side for a moment, then stood up straighter. “I mean, I paid for it if that’s what you’re asking...”

“How much was this, Miles?” Voice trembling when you spoke, you asked again but louder, and this time he knew you actually wanted an answer.

Confused because he didn’t take you for the materialistic type, he racked his brain for the memory of the total the clerk had read out to him and scratched his forehead.

“Like… three hundred and some change…maybe? Probably four? I don’t remember. Why does this matter?” He let out a peeved sigh, eyes widening as he watched your shoulders start to shake.

“Ay, mi amor, ¿que pasa? (what’s wrong, my love?)” Miles asked gently as he rushed to sit next to you, taking the jewelry box from your loose hold. He looked down at it disappointedly, lips pursing at the necklace he’d spent so long picking out. He thought you would’ve loved it. “You don’t like it? I can get you somethin’ better—“

“No, Miles. I… It’s perfect.” Warm tears rolled past your waterline and you wiped them away in a rush, aggravated that you were even crying in front of him about something like this. How could you explain yourself without sounding ungrateful or confusing him even more?

Miles licked at his dry lips as he tried to think of what to say. He was usually so good at reading your body language, but this time he was completely lost. You could see it on his expression when you looked at him that he was having a hard time understanding what was going on, and it only made you cry harder.

“No entiendo… (I don’t understand…)” He set the box down next to him and took your hands into his, head lowered to try and meet your averted gaze. “I’m lost.. If it’s perfect, then what’s wrong?”

You inhaled a wavered breath, the feeling of his thumbs rubbing the backs of your hands serving as encouragement for you to go on.

“I just…” taking a breath, your shoulders shrugged weakly. “You spending money on me like this, I— It feels like I’m using you. You should be spending your hard earned money on things for yourself, or… saving it for better things, not spending it on me.”

“Money is nothing to me when it comes to you.” he denied immediately.

“I know, and that’s the problem.” Your lips trembled, but thankfully you were able to prevent more tears from coming.

“Y/n, I—“

“Just, please. Let me finish.” You pleaded quietly, looking up to see him slowly nod at you. “I love you, Miles, and that means I love everything you do for me as well. But I’m not used to things like this.” you looked in the direction of the overturned jewelry box. “It’s a lot.”

Silence filled the space around the two of you. You felt incredibly guilty for even bringing it up, it was never your intention to make him feel this way. There was an energy shift and you could sense him regressing back to the version of him that once didn’t know how to express his love for you.

“I’m sorry.” he murmured simply. He didn’t know what else to say, he didn’t even understand, but he offered it to you anyway.

“No no no, Miles,” You guided his doleful eyes back to you with a hand on his cheek, your tone sincere. “I love the way you love me, really, I do. You don’t have anything to apologize for. It’s not your fault— I’m just not that kind of girl and I don’t know if I ever will be. But the way I grew up and the things I’m used to have nothing to do with you, and everything to do with me, okay?”

He frowned slightly. “So… No more gifts, then?”

You shook your head. “Giving me nice things is how you show your love towards me, I know that, and it would be unfair for me to take that from you. I’d be crazy to not appreciate how you’re always thinking of me wherever you go.”

Chewing on your thoughts, you contemplated the best way to give your answer.

“Okay, so it’s like this,” you sat up a bit. “You could give me a rock, and I’d cherish it like it was the best thing in the entire world, simply because you gave it to me. What I’m trying to say is how expensive the gift is doesn’t matter, all that matters is that my wonderful—“ your head dipped to meet his avoidant eyes. “caring, and thoughtful boyfriend got it for me. I don’t care about the money, I only care that it came from you.”

Miles brightened a little at that, and started to put things together after your explanation. “So, I can still get you nice things, but… less is more?”

A melancholic smile touched your lips before you pecked his cheek. “Less is more.”

He picked the small jewelry box up from the bed. He understood you completely now, but was still a bit bummed. “Does that mean I have to return this?”

You immediately shook your head. “Of course not, baby. I love it, and I think it’s beautiful. Just keep what I said in mind for next time, okay?” He nodded and you turned your back towards him so he could put it on for you.

“Good, cause I kinda lost the receipt.” Miles smiled coyly at the slightly shaky laugh that sounded from you as he unclasped the necklace, draping it over your chest and fastening it.

You peered down at the gorgeous piece around your neck, gently gracing over it with your fingertips. Your heart warmed at the thought of him picking it out for you, how he spotted something this beautiful and needed you to have it. You had to admit, it was absolutely stunning and you didn’t think you’d be taking it off any time soon. Even if the price of it had almost sent you into shock, you were more than grateful to have a boyfriend like him.

“Thank you, Miles. I love it, really.” You faced him once again with your confession, the sincerity laced in your tone accentuating the adoration in your eyes. Your hand caressed the apple of his cheek, it raising when he smiled contently and leaned into your palm. “But I love you, more.”

[yourdoorisunlocked]

ᴠᴀʟᴇɴᴛɪɴᴇ'ꜱ ᴅᴀʏ ᴠᴇxᴀᴛɪᴏɴꜱ - ꜰʟᴜꜰꜰ

𝐀/𝐍: Whew! Ok, I'm taking a small break right now- I have one more request to do, and ofc as soon as I can I'll finish it, but I don't want to burn myself out or anything.

I'm just taking a quick writing rehab right now. Nonetheless, the banter was so fun to do, and I hope you all like it!

If I do write another chapter for the week, it'll probably be for What A Dish, What A Doll!

➺ 𝐖𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐂𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 2,903 ➺ Song Recommendation: 𝓔𝓵𝓮𝓬𝓽𝓻𝓲𝓬 𝓛𝓸𝓿𝓮 | 𝓑𝓸𝓻𝓷𝓼

. . .

The chill of February’s frosted breath graced the glass panes of the largest building in the Vee’s district, an imposing force that not-so-subtly hinted at how far their influence and power expanded across the Sinner’s Circle of Hell, as it stood right in the heart of the Pride Ring for all to flock to. No matter how depraved, sadistic, or perverted you were, the territory of the Vees surely had something in store for your insatiable appetite to feast upon. 

And since the first twenty-four hours of the infamously romantic month, chaos had erupted within the offices of the Vees. Other than Halloween, it was the greatest vice of Vox’s hellish existence, filling his calendar to the brim with meetings, product improvement, managing holiday events and sales, and not to mention Velvet’s stupid “Love Potion” gimmick- 

For Christ’s sake, the goddamn holiday started with a ‘V’! Their brand of perfection practically relied on that lovey-dovey nonsense. 

For the past week, the only thing filling up Vox’s schedule and keeping him from you was showcasing shitty rom coms with horribly conceived plots, Velvet rushing around like a mini-hurricane and destroying everything in her wake for her latest fashion show, and Valentino? 

Oh, don’t even get Vox fucking started. 

And now, after all of that overwhelming bullshit that kept him from warming your bed for the past few days, Vox desperately wanted – no, needed to escape and spend quality time with his darling. With you.  

He had the usual Valentine’s Day blueprint in mind: eat ice cream and binge-watch your favorite TV-shows, while you flustered the hell out of him with your affections and make hot chocolate, and then fall asleep in each other’s arms by the fire.

Mundane, cheesy shit like that was the highlight of his days after another exhausting workday keeping it all roped together and navigating Velvet and Valentino's nonsense. 

Their facade was of modern sophistication, perfection at its very finest that was produced for only those who could afford it, and it was all piled into Vox’s lap to regulate the chaotic, unpredictable behavior of his fellow Overlords, and keep their volatile nature in check. 

But the continuous hardship that came with his stressful job would fade with the wintry wind as soon as he stepped off the elevator and into your shared penthouse, and like a patch of sunlight to snow, you’d melt away all his worries with a smile and a rub of his head as you took care of him for the night. 

Almost there... 

The television demon groaned as he crossed the threshold over to your apartments, seeing no need to keep up his perfectly aligned posture. 

And, like a mercy served by Gods, Vox was met with the heavenly sight of you standing in your fluffy, midnight blue bathrobe that you’d received on your birthday, courtesy of Val. Vox would’ve personally burned it to high hell, but you adored the design, and he couldn’t resist you when you pleaded with him. 

“Vox...” crossing your arms at the doorway, his light, his spark, his reason to maintain everything about his own reputation stood with a stern furrow in your brow as you strode over to him. 

“Don’t tell me you’ve been overworking yourself again, love,” you grumbled as you took off his bowtie and removed his coat, and you smoothed out the front of his striped vest as Vox stumbled for an answer. 

“I-” *sigh* “I’m not pushing myself that much. You know how the job is, especially around this time,” seeing your face fall and your lips tighten into a straight line, Vox took your hand, squeezing it within his gloved palms as his sharp teeth pulled into a small half-smile. 

“But coming home to you makes it all worth it,” a tender hand dancing with waves of tingling sparks cupped your cheek, and with a heavy sigh, you looked to him with concern and affection swirling within your tender gaze. 

“Yeah, yeah. All I’m saying is those two bumbling excuses of Overlords should at least give you a couple of days off,” you scowled softly, but your frown melted into a flustered pout as Vox kissed it away, and a soft buzz of electricity lingered against your lips. 

“Now, now, enough of that, my dear. We still have the whole night to ourselves, don’t we?” You giggled, a long-awaited melody to his ears as Vox spun you around to press your back against his chest. How beautifully the sound replaced Velvet's usual grating, shrill voice that penetrated his ears. How agreeable you were, that you didn't fight him like Valentino, that you truly cared about him and his well-being.

Sometimes, you'd even force his workaholic ass to return to your apartment and get him ready for bed, practically hauling your grumbling, overworked hubby into bed, and forcing him to sleep in the next morning.

And it was the sappy, lovesick moments like these always reminded Vox that he'd never find anyone else like you.

All the more reason to keep you tightly within his grasp...

“Yeah, I guess, so. You dork,” you flicked the very center of your husband’s face, and he blinked a few times in surprise before chuckling and shaking his head. 

“Oh, yeah? And what does that make you for loving me~?” Vox swayed against you gently, his inner fans suddenly warming himself up more than usual as he poorly attempted to conceal his light blush at having you so close.

Your laughter chimed through the air like the first sunbeams breaking through stormy gray clouds upon the aftermath of a thunderstorm. 

“Well, I suppose that makes me your lover,” you simpered right back at him, turning your head slightly so you could stand on your tiptoes and kiss him.

It felt almost like a dream when you were in Vox’s arms like this. Simply existing with each other, standing above the Pride Ring as if you ruled the entire Sinner’s Circle. Untouchable, ambitious, and madly in love. 

As if on cue, the sound of a gentle, reflective saxophone poured from the speakers installed within the penthouse as the lights dimmed, and you felt yourself drifting away as you swayed with your husband.  

The soft buzz of electricity bounced against your figure as Vox stared down at you, his dead, automated heart pounding erratically as his hands slid from yours down to your waist, digging into the fabric of your robe with sharpened claws. 

“Vox...?” 

“Yes, my dear?” 

With a deep breath, you lilted your voice as you spoke to him, in hopes that seeming more placating and docile could shake Vox’s stance upon his insistence to work himself to the bone. No more would you allow yourself to stand hopelessly to the side while you watched your husband work himself into such a distressed, sleep-deprived state. 

“I’m putting my foot down. You’re not going back to that horrible place for the next week, at least.” Vox stiffened at your tone of finality. 

“Excuse me?” He chuckled as if you were joking with him, but your resolute glare told him otherwise. “Check your phone.” 

With a hesitant glance towards his pocket, Vox slowly pulled out his phone, only to find that, in fact, every work-related app had been temporarily blocked from the device. 

Raising an eyebrow, he looked back at you and tapped your nose with a haughty smirk. “Nice try, but it’s going to take more than that for me to fall for your wiles, my dear,”  

When you only grinned up at him with no hint of malice nor any trace of exasperation tugging at your usual, beautiful smile, his triumphant grin fell. “Why are you looking at me like that? What...” 

 A slow realization turned in Vox's mind as he recollected the last few days, when you were poking and prodding at him and his programming for “no apparent reason,” and he wrote it off as curiosity born from your boredom while being locked up at the penthouse apartment. 

But by fuck, he was really regretting indulging you right now, for once. 

With a surge of panic, Vox immediately blue-screened, as he mentally checked for any of his work-related tabs and files, only to find them completely, and suspiciously empty. 

No notes. No texts. No documents. 

Nothing. 

You... You fucking hacked into his mainframe!? 

His interface returned to normal to find you slumped against him, only perking up when you saw your husband had returned from his frenzied search of the crime that had been committed; the heinous act of keeping Vox from working.

And here the culprit was standing, swooning and relaxing in his hold, nuzzling against him as if she wasn’t to blame for his entire workspace vanishing off the face of the Earth for the next seven days.

“Well...?” 

“...How long have you been planning this?” Vox was absolutely aghast. He knew you could be impulsive, perhaps even irrational, compared to your cool, collected husband, but this was... 

You grinned triumphantly as you tapped his nose right back. 

“I just thought you could use a few days off, spending some time in your wife's company for Valentine's Day~..."

“But when did you- No, how the hell-?” 

“It seems that you’ve fallen victim to my wiles yet again,” 

“Oho, you sneaky little-!” Vox practically tackled you into a hug as he discharged a small bout of electricity, tickling you with an electrifying warmth, just by holding you against him. 

“C’mon, I’ve got another surprise for you,” with a soft giggle and a gentle tug of his antenna, you pulled Vox from the floor as his free hand shot up to his hat with a small, bashful frown. 

“I told you to stop that!” He outwardly groaned, but you could hear the flustered electrical buzz that Vox emitted whenever you did something to him that he really liked.  

“You know I don’t like it,” he muttered, but as always, you saw right through him. 

“And we both know that’s one of the biggest lies you’ve ever told me,” you grinned back at him cheekily as you pulled him into the living area, where you had spent most of your afternoon setting up when Vox was occupied with his work. 

In the living room, you had set up a small, cozy gaming area. It then hit Vox just how long you had been setting this up, waiting for him to drop his guard and into your scheming hands.

That little criminal...

Two controllers, one for you, and one for Vox, sat upon a pile of fluffy blankets. A few pillows draped in silk cloth surrounded the area on the couch, and before it upon the coffee table, there sat a freshly made bowl of popcorn, and various other chocolate candies and snacks.

“Hm... Seems like someone’s been itching for a rematch.” A challenge glinted in his sensors, and you leaned into him with an equally blazing ire.

"You wanna bet...?"

. . .

“GODDAMN FUCKING BLUE SHELL! I’LL DESTROY YOU, YOU SPIKED SON OF A BITCH!”  

“HA-HA! GUESS WHO’S IN THE LEAD, NOW!?”  

Your fingers pressed the controller furiously as the TV blared in front of you, and as you crossed the finish line, you let out a whoop of victory, nearly falling out of Vox’s lap in your bout of triumph. 

“Yes!” “No!! Fuck!”  

You and Vox shouted simultaneously, making you burst into a fit of triumphant laughter as he groaned and slumped defeatedly behind you. 

“Are you serious!? That’s the fifth time in a row!” Vox nearly crushed his controller in his vice grip as he threw a slew of curses at the TV.  

The two of you had been playing Mario Kart for the past hour, blissfully unaware of how your gaming match had whisked the both of you into a heated competition of bumper cars and tallying points for each round someone won, and the winner would be picking the movie you watched.

You stuck your tongue out at him with a victorious beam. “It seems the Nintendo wants us to watch the Kissing Booth tonight,” you giggled madly when Vox’s face scrunched up in disgust.  

“Yeah, babe, there is no way I’m watching that.” 

“Aw, come on, I won fair and square!" you leaned into your husband, who sighed with exasperation but softened at the sight of your pout. 

“Please...? I promise we’ll watch whatever you want tomorrow!” 

“It’s my first day off the job, and you want to watch the goddamn Kissing Booth!?” 

"Pretty please, Sparks?" Vox’s aura buzzed softly at the nickname, and he narrowed his eyes down at you as you begged him with your puppy eyes.

“Playing dirty, huh? Fine. Let’s watch your dumbass movie,” Vox pouted with crossed arms as he slumped into the couch in defeat and his antenna buzzed softly in annoyance. It sparked abruptly when you clapped excitedly and pulled him by his collar to lay a tender kiss on his cheek.  

“Thank you! I promise, you’ll love it,” you grinned mischievously and grabbed the remote. 

Vox, in fact, did not love it. In fact, it was so bad that you both started watching it ironically and threw jabs at it occasionally.   

“So, who do you think she should pick? Her psycho-controlling best friend, or the pretty boy with anger issues~,” You leaned your head against his shoulder as you shoveled a handful of popcorn into your mouth, your eyes glued to the screen. 

Vox sighed and rubbed his forehead, equally as invested as you were despite your shared frustration with the film.  

“Honestly? She should dump both of them and run for the goddamn hills.”  

You snorted. “Yeah? Well, I would’ve chosen her boyfriend. He gets better over the next couple of movies.” Vox raised an eyebrow at you. “Seriously?”  

Popping a few M&Ms into your mouth, you nodded at him. “Yeah, I’m serious! He gets some serious character development,” you mutter sarcastically, before licking your lips with a shit-eating grin. “He seems really cold and angry on the outside, but he’s not so bad once you get to know him.” 

Nudging his shoulder, you glance not-so-subtly up at him, and Vox took the hint, tickling your sides softly with a smirk. 

“And I’m a dork?” 

“Yeah, and you’re a contagious one, too!” Your hands grabbed at his arms as he crushed you into a hug, pulling you even closer as he rested his head upon yours. 

“Well, then I guess that makes two of us, doesn’t it my dear~?”  

“No! Stop! Please, I can't breathe!” You attempted to flail around dramatically, but within Vox's vice grip, that was next to impossible. 

“Ah-ah-ah! I’m afraid you’re trapped within my wiles, darling!” 

“Curse you! How dare you use my own spells against me!” You giggled as he continued his bombardment of tickles and small, feathered kissing against your nape and the small back of your neck. 

Soon, your laughter died down and you both fell silent as you finished the rest of the movie.

While you slowly began to drift off into sleep in Vox's arms, spent from the day of preparing your apartment for your husband's arrival, he looked down at you with a tender half-smile.

I can't believe someone like you would even look at someone like me...

"Hey, babe-?" He whispered out into the dark, before huffing out a chuckle when he realized you were still asleep.

With a soft smile, and a tender patter of his heart, Vox scooped you up and whisked you away to your bedroom, where he silently dresses you up in a pair of pajamas, and tucked you into bed.

Ever so gently, Vox laid a few of the blankets over your form, dragging them and the silk pillows back from the couch to make his little sleeping beauty ever the more comfortable.

He looked upon you as you dozed the minutes away, blissfully oblivious to the war that raged inside of him. 

While Vox was impressed that you had managed to somehow hack into his mainframe and alter his actual mental programming, it really would take more than basic understanding – plus, you pulled it off unguarded. Now, of course, this spawned a new problem for him, but he’d deal with it in due time. Besides, it’d give him a proper excuse to slack off a little bit, with you. 

God, what was he thinking? The old Vox would’ve seen such a desire to goof around with some girl while the other two Vees went around wreaking havoc and partaking in whatever idiocy without Vox to keep them in check. 

But you weren’t just ‘some girl’ to him. 

And frankly, those two clowns could go fuck themselves. 

A part of Vox wanted to remain in your bed, for your sake, but there was work to be done, and Velvet no doubt was positively livid at the fact that he wasn’t answering any of her calls. 

So, with a newfound confidence in his advances, your husband bent over you, softly pinching your chin within his finely sharpened claws, and laying a few tender kisses trailing from your lips down to your nape. 

I wish I could do this to you when you’re awake... But that smile, fuck, I can’t even form sentences without fumbling when you look at me like all you want is to give me the world. 

You groaned and turned over within the sheets, scooching towards him with a soft furrow in your brow.

Vox kissed it away, before reluctantly pulling away from your side, standing at the door with a small, yearning smile.

“Til morning, my dear.” 

. . . 

𝐄𝐧𝐝 𝐍𝐨𝐭𝐞𝐬: Happy Valentine's Day from our favorite crazy-ass TV demon!

I'm sorry I didn't get to post this yesterday, but I was feeling so unmotivated by the end of it, and I decided to rewrite most of this fluff fic, just to give you all a quality post.

I don't half-ass things, especially when it comes to writing, that's just why my fics take a while to post.

Anyways, thank you so much for reading, and comments are always appreciated!

. . . 

𝑻𝒂𝒈𝒍𝒊𝒔𝒕: @hazzbindarlingg, @darkangel582, @starsformydarlingmazel, @chitter-chatter, @matrixbearer2024

[harlowtales]

Y/N goes into labour at Gazebo Fest with Jack on stage 👶🏻

18+ only - Mature Themes🚨

“Ok baby I hope you’re ok.” Jack said as he kissed you and grabbed his keys heading out the door to head to Gazebo Fest sound check in the heat of a May Kentucky afternoon.

“Will you please go? Grandpa is coming to pick me up later. We’ll be in the VIP section so gramps is out of the way. I know this is your first festival you’re running for the city and I’m about to deliver this baby at any moment but everything is going to be fine.” You went in for a deeper kiss as you couldn’t get enough of your husband’s pillowy perfect heart shaped lips. Your favourite thing to do was suck on his juicy bottom lip just to remind him of who’s boss.

“Mmmmm don’t start ok, I’m going to be late. I don’t know how you manage to heighten my anxiety and calm me down at the same time.” Jack said to you half wanting to take you into the bedroom but his heart was beating fast as he had his mind on the 2 days coming up of the whole production of the festival. It was all on him to make it a success.

As planned Grandpa came to get you and promised he wouldn’t go and try to get too close to the action. He insisted on going and Jack had a hard time talking him out of things. Now that you were pregnant it was more him keeping an eye on you.

“Are you comfortable Y/N? Let me know if you need anything” Grandpa said as you took your seats. He was forever the gentleman and it was obvious where Jack got it from.

“I’m fine, just feeling the pressure is all” you said as you rubbed your belly “the baby is sitter lower.”

“Oh I know it’s just a matter of time. We’re all very excited. I have big plans for this little one. Maybe they’ll like car sales and I can buy them a dealership.” He said proudly.

“Maybe Grandpa.” You said with a giggle. Everyone was putting their 2 cents in as to what the first grandchild from Jack would be. Jack and you agreed you would let your child decide what they want. Jack said if they want to act or rap he wasn’t going to stand in the way, but was maybe hoping for a doctor or professor.

The opening acts were done and it was time for the big moment for the King of Kentucky to take the stage. You got as excited as any fan and were disappointed you weren’t allowed to watch from the side of the stage as usual but Jack wanted you out of harms way and away from the music being too loud. In the box they catered to your every need, but you would rather be hanging out around the stage drinking ice cold Modelo in the heat.

It was evening now and you didn’t want to miss Jack but it was too long of a day for you now. You asked if there was someway to lay down and Grandpa was concerned. “We can go home” he suggested kindly.

“No I….I don’t want to miss Jack.” You said wincing a bit from the baby kicking hard.

“Y/N you don’t look good.” Grandpa said honestly and concerned.

“That’s enough for you for the day. There’s plenty other times for you to see Jack.” He insisted.

“But there’s no…ouch!” You paused and winced. This felt different. It was a sharper pain you hadn’t felt before. “There’s no other first….oh!” It came again “No other first Gazebo Fest.” You finally finished saying in between wincing and flinching from sharp pains you were starting to feel in waves.

“Get over here! She’s going into labour, I need help!” Grandpa said having no idea what to do. He thought he could handle it but seeing you in such pain was too much for him. He had grown so close to you it was hard for him and he had never seen a baby born in his life. In the days his wife had babies husbands weren’t allowed in the room.

“I got this don’t worry.” Sunni said who was hanging around in the vicinity. He didn’t want to step on Grandpa’s toes who claimed territory over being beside you, but he knew if shit went down he was the only other one in Jack’s circle that could help. He had seen his sister’s kids born in her home birth and helped out during the whole ordeal.

“You got this ok?” Sunni said rubbing your back “breathe like this” he demonstrated taking a deep breath in for a count of 3 and slowly letting it out. You started to feel more in control, but the contractions were speeding up.

An ambulance was on the way and venue security was making sure the whole area was blocked off for privacy. They found a cot for you to lay on as you felt weak. Jack continued to spit bars of such hits as Nail Tech, and They Don’t Love It while you started to cry out in pain holding Sunni’s hand tight as he guided you in what to do. He advised people to not call Jack but in an open air festival people saw a commotion in your section and cell phone started coming out like crazy.

Finally the ambulance got there and gently moved you onto the stretcher. Jack saw ambulance lights in the distance and paused the show as he always did concerned about the crowd. He hadn’t yet got the news while performing that his baby was coming.

“Everyone please take one step back. An ambulance is here please if someone needs help clear the area and make sure everyone around you is safe.” He said trying to keep the crowd calm. Just then Urban came up on the stage and whispered in Jack’s ear.

“What the fuck??” He said to Urban amplified by the mic near his mouth. “She said what? Finish my set? Is she fucking crazy?”

In between contractions you sent a message for Jack to finish his set and not leave to come to the hospital. There was too much riding on Gazebo Fest for him to not continue for the fans. In your mind this made perfect sense. Sunni was with you in the ambulance and Grandpa was following in his car. Grandpa had alerted the whole family who was headed to the hospital also.

“Y’all I gotta fucking go. I’m having a baby!” Jack screamed and everyone at the festival roared as Jack jumped down off the side and took off running. Urban, his security, and assistant had no choice but to take off and try to keep up with him. Kat his assistant was running behind him with the puppy who was barking with excitement. They located the black sprinter van and jumped in “How fucking fast can you go?” Jack asked the driver “I’m having a baby.” The driver looked at him confused. “No not me my wife I mean, fuck go!!” Jack said flustered.

It took about half an hour to get to the hospital and was the longest 30 minutes of Jack’s life. “K, I need to know where my wife is. I’m Jack Harlow and her name is Y/N Harlow.” Jack explained as he walked up to the counter out of breath.

“We know who you are Mr.Harlow. Please remain calm. Your wife is on the 12 floor in room 1204, she hasn’t delivered yet, but you’ll have to squeeze in. Your whole family is in there.” The front desk admin explained not too happy with about 6 people in the birthing room that wouldn’t take no for an answer.

Maggie was wiping your brown as you were in position. You had your hospital gown on and a large sheet over your bottom half. You were dilated and the baby’s head was crowning when Jack burst into the room. They managed to stop him long enough for him to put on a gown, wash his hands, and put gloves on.

The baby was coming fast. It had only been a few hours since your contractions started. Jack got there just in time. “Whoah baby! Look at you my superstar. You…oh…oh shit! I see the head!!! She’s coming!” Jack exclaimed and let out the secret you were having a girl. None of his family knew until he just blurted it out. The whole family cheered much to the doctor’s dismay and more people had showed up like Urban and 6 of Jack’s other friends.

“Ok everyone I know this is a big deal, but it’s a little tight in here can you please step outside and Mr. Harlow please contain yourself. It’s distracting. Baby is coming and we need to focus.”

“Yeah of course doc I got you.” Jack said “Ok y’all get da fuck out.” He said to everybody ushering them out of the room. I gotta catch my little soccer ball right quick here.”

“That’s not exactly what I meant Mr.Harlow but thank you for clearing the room. Now are you ready?” The doctor said motioning for Jack to crouch down and get in position to catch the baby.

“Doc I said I got you. You don’t even need to be here for real. I got this.” Jack said confidently.

You were so happy to see him. It was getting chaotic and Jack being him brought you some peace and made you laugh which took your mind off some of the pain.

“You look good down there baby as usual, don’t trip, ain’t no thang, just need a few more pushes and she’s out.” Jack said coaching you in his own way.

“Jack don’t make me laugh right now.” You begged breathlessly holding Maggie’s hand and trying to listen to the nurse telling you when to push, breathe, and stop. He was being completely serious and didn’t get how much he was irritating the doctor.

“Ok Mrs. Harlow bear down and give a big push. This is it.” The nurse said. “Mr. Harlow get ready. Hold your hands like this. Here’s your clamp and scissors.” She said handing everything over to Jack who wasn’t ready for what everything entailed in this moment. His whole world was about to change and it hit him like a ton of bricks.

“Welp you got this so I can go.” The doctor joked with Jack patting him on the back and heading for the door.

“Ah hell naw doc, I was just kidding please don’t go.” Jack begged.

“Uughhhh!!!!!” You screamed and bared down hard. The head came out and rest of the body just slipped out quickly. Jack caught his daughter filled with so many emotions he started to cry with joy. Guided by the doctor he clamped the umbilical cord and snipped it. It all happened so fast.

“Mr. Harlow you want to bring your daughter over and clean her off for mom?” The nurse asked as Jack was just stunned staring at her in his arms. Her tiny body was shaking with loud crying.

“Got good lungs on her baby.” Jack said to you staring at her and continuing to hold her.

“Jack give Y/N the baby.” Maggie said “She needs to eat and bond right away…Jackman…did you hear me?”

“Jack give me my dang baby.” You said prying her away as he was fixated on her. She latched on immediately and sucked happily resting on your tummy. She was beautiful with fine brown curls, olive complexion, and grey/hazel eyes she hadn’t fully opened yet. Jack saw a dimple like his when she yawned and he lost his mind. You were exhausted and had nothing left. Jack kissed you on the forehead and pulled back the curtain covering the glass doors.

About 20 people were waiting from outside the room. It was the most famous birth the hospital had ever had. They all would have been front row for the event had they been allowed.

“Don’t y’all got nothing better to do?” Jack teased them. “Y’all act like there ain’t a festival going on. We’ll have y’all over soon. Thanks for coming I love y’all so much but we getting on these good people last nerves so go on y’all.”

“Just one peak.” Phil said anxiously

“No come on Phil.” Said Ismail pulling him away

“Baby, you ready cuz they all crazy.” Jack said about all your family and friends

“And my family hasn’t come yet.” You said rolling your eyes. They had a ways to travel from out of state but when your mother and Grandmother and aunties got there, it was going to be something else. Your daughter had no shortage of love.

“Did you see the way I cut the cord like a boss” Jack bragged.

“Hunny please.” Maggie said “You did nothing compared to Y/N.”

“Ok fair but I executed perfectly. She has a perfect lil belly button.” He beamed with pride.

“Jack.” You said faintly as you were now just too weak and falling asleep ready to go to your room and rest.

“Yes baby?” He said “You want me to take her so you can rest. I get it give her to me.” Jack said eagerly

“No, I want you to go, like can you leave please?” You said half smiling “like how turnt can you be right now. Just looking at you is making me tired.”

“Ok. I’ll chill out but let me take her please.” He said reaching down to scoop her up.

“Hunny hold her like this.” Maggie said “hold her head properly.”

“Mom I got it.” Jack said defensively

This was just the beginning of motherhood as Mrs.Harlow.

@okaaay-mice @itsyagirljaz @ride4harlow

[aeonmagnus]

https://newsroom.hasbro.com/news-releases/news-release-details/hasbro-announces-til-all-are-one-transformers-40th-anniversary

40 YEARS. ONE LEGACY.

Relive the Magic of the 1984 Animated Series Featuring an Exclusive Behind-the-Scenes Table Read with Peter Cullen, Frank Welker and Other Original TRANSFORMERS Voice Actors – Only in Theaters Starting May 15

PAWTUCKET, RI — April 3, 2024 — Hasbro Inc., a leading toy and game company, announced today a special cinema experience to celebrate four decades of the TRANSFORMERS franchise with ‘TIL ALL ARE ONE: TRANSFORMERS 40th ANNIVERSARY EVENT. Honoring the brand’s legacy in bringing continuous action and adventure to fans of all ages, the theatrical event will provide limited screenings of episodes from the classic 1984 animated series “THE TRANSFORMERS.” Screenings will be available in select cinemas across the US, UK and Mexico, along with select territories in Europe, Latin America and Asia starting on Wednesday, May 15. Tickets for the TRANSFORMERS 40th Anniversary Event will go on sale at Transformers40thCinemaEvent.com on Wednesday, April 10 at 9.30am Local Time.

This special cinema experience will take fans back to the very beginning as some of the TRANSFORMERS original voice-over talent, including Peter Cullen (original voice of Optimus Prime) and Frank Welker (original voice of Megatron), team up for the first time in decades to revisit their characters and recreate the enduring magic of the classic 1984 animated series. An exclusive behind-the-scenes table read appears on a split screen for the pilot episode, More Than Meets the Eye, Part 1, followed by a traditional screening of the next three episodes of the series. Fans can experience the original Saturday morning cartoon on the big screen and get a glimpse of its evolution with a sneak peek of the new season of the original animated kids’ series TRANSFORMERS: EARTHSPARK. This is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to celebrate 40 years of TRANSFORMERS action, humor and legacy at an anniversary event that is truly... More Than Meets the Eye!

“For decades, the battle between the Autobots and Decepticons has come to life in movies, comic books, innovative toys, live experiences and digital media, elevating the TRANSFORMERS brand to a global powerhouse franchise with millions of fans around the world. To celebrate 40 years, we’re bringing fans back to where it all started,” said Alyse D’Antuono, Vice President, Global Franchise Strategy & Management, Action Brands at Hasbro. “THE TRANSFORMERS animated series captured the imagination of fans of all ages when it premiered in 1984, introducing a timeless battle between good and evil fueled by action and adventure. Ask any longtime fan, and they can probably tell you where they were when they first heard Optimus Prime’s iconic phrase ‘Autobots, roll out’ or what it felt like when they first converted a bot character into its alt mode. With exclusive content featuring the series’ original voice actors, this theatrical event is truly for our fans and invites audiences to experience the fun that started it all.”

Distributed by Trafalgar Releasing, the global leader in Event Cinema distribution, this is the second time the company has partnered with Hasbro, Inc., following Peppa’s Cinema Party that screened in cinemas worldwide in February 2024.

For the latest information on the TRANSFORMERS franchise, including toys and entertainment, follow @TRANSFORMERSOfficial on Instagram, @TransformersOfficial on Threads, @TRANSFORMERS on Facebook and @TRANSFORMERSOfficial on TikTok #40yearsonelegacy.

[easternmind]

Lessons in Japanese Game Design #3

From Killer7 to Deadly Premonition, Japanese game creators have intrepidly explored the theme of mental illness in a variety of genres, often in highly stylized form. The title I wish to approach today is a lesser known reference that approached this subject matter with unusual tact and clarity - a memory, if you will, which the collective conscious has long repressed.

Maria Kimi Tachi Ga Umareta Wake (The Reason You Were Born) is a late 1997 adventure game firmly rooted in the visual novel template that earned Chunsoft great repute. It was Break studio's debut, produced over a year and half for both the PlayStation and Saturn systems. It was published by Axela, a company born out of the internal management conflicts and accumulated debt at ASCII, leading to some of its executives teaming up in 1996 to establish a new project centred around software and magazine publishing. The story of this company's origins, alone, would merit a separate post.

Foreseeably, its release was followed by moderate controversy, such that worked mostly in its favour. One of the most polemical moments is found in the introduction scene, with its tasteful yet unvarnished depiction of Maria's suicide attempt, followed by her hospital admission. The imagery and that which it depicts remains as painful to watch today as it did decades ago.

While Maria is the central character, her tragedy and arc merge with that of the actual protagonist, Jun Takano, a fledgeling surgeon who, in the quality of certified psychiatrist, is assigned to provide therapy to the French-Japanese patient the morning after her admittance.

Maria's mental illness component comes to light as the story and therapy sessions progress. The key art consists of photos of women using coloured masks to visually represent the dimensions of her multiple personality disorder.

(Note: the text above is machine translated from the original Japanese game manual.)

Break was denounced for its bid to integrate so serious a derangement as a theme in a juvenile entertainment piece. Their reaction was to highlight the research done to ensure a careful treatment of the subject and sensitization of players via a bespoke message in the manual. In retrospect, the relative popularity of this game at the time was greatly owned to this fleeting controversy, and is believed to have been a crucial factor in the obtention of budget for Maria's far less spirited sequel.

As a work of pure fiction, scenario writer Kirie Fukuda was at liberty to carry the already divisive premise into even more exotic territory by establishing a mysterious yet playful correspondence between Maria's distinct personas and Egyptian deities.

The game's structure is modelled after hirudorama, a Japanese word interchangeably used to describe daytime TV fiction or soap operas; each of its nine chapters lasting nearly thirty minutes, equipped with a plot twist, cliff-hanger ending, and followed by rolling credits.

Perhaps the single most outstanding aspect about this production results from a tireless effort to surpass the standard of authenticity in what pertains facial expressions; particularly those of the multifaceted Maria, often with stilted yet all the more fascinating results.

In this and other regards, the influence of D no Shokutaku and its character, Laura, is clear and unmistakable. Maria's director and studio head at Break, Akira Okada, was an ex-Warp employee who worked as sales director precisely at the time when Eno's game was being developed.

Following a modest success, Break released Maria 2: Jutaikokuchi no Nazo in 99, a not-so-direct sequel which did not command the same attention as the original. The studio created other noteworthy visual novels: Ouma ga Toki and its sequel, as well as the most unusual Saishuu Densha, a paranormal-themed romantic story involving two strangers who meet in a train.

Before closing, it would pay to emphasize that this is an entirely different adventure game from the similarly forgotten MA-RI-A Ningōkan no Noroi, a 1996 3D CG horror adventure designed by Osamu Tezuka's son, Makoto; and scored by Kuniaki Haishima, of Kowloon's Gate and Siren 2 fame.

Nor is it related in any way with the so-called "Maria" episode from the Yarudora visual novel game series, Sampaguita, released in 1997 for the PlayStation by Sugar & Rockets and Production I.G.

[drawing-prompt-s]

Jolene Fundraiser - Round 2

So I was trying to avoid doing this by selling my laptop but that is taking longer than expected. It's already been up for sale for a month with no bites other than bots and scammers.

GOFUNDME HERE

PAYPAL HERE

Summarized version of the GOFUNDME post:

Jolene was previously treated for ear mites brought in by my roommate's cat. She was treated and our apartment was visited by exterminators in the meantime. My roommate said she got her cat treated for them as well at her vet.

She lied.

My roommate and I do not get along, partially because her cat will chase down Jolene and attack her unprompted. She has been extremely territorial since she moved in.

I have been staying in my room 24/7 because of issues with my roommate. And I left to gather some items while she was gone, unaware she left her ear mite infested cat out there who then attacked Jolene who had come with me. I separated them, thankfully without injury to Jolene, but did not realize between the attack and the apartment being reinfested that Jolene got ear mites again.

I noticed a few days ago for sure when Jolene tore her ears up trying to scratch them. Blood drawn, cuts, etc. This time they are worse than before and she has not stopped going at her ears and crying. The only time she isn't going at them is while asleep, and sometimes they will still wake her up. I have been doing what I can to ease the pain and inflammation but they need to be flushed, cleaned, and given antibiotics at the vet - something that will cost me another $300.

Again, I tried getting the money myself by selling my laptop but with no luck in the last month. I met with the property manager here about the situation and our lease allows for forcible transfers. They are forcibly transferring my current roommate out within two weeks.

The goal is $300 in 2 weeks because of her forced removal. My apartment complex will cover the cost of the exterminators.

I do not have much to offer, but if interested, I usually make faux song covers for pets; if you want one done of a pet or person I would be happy to make one for you, additional stickers, etc, can be made. They are the size of phone lockscreens - that is what I use them as. Just message me a picture @prophet-rebellion of your donation confirmation, the photo you want me to use for the lock screen, and a song you want. You can see the simple ones linked here.

$350/$350

The last $100 I needed was sent while I was asleep so that means I've reached the full $350 already. Thank you everyone!!

[jokeroutsubs]

📝 ENG Translation: European Tours in Times of Inflation

💬Kris Guštin shares some insight into the organization of Joker Out's recent See You Soon tour.

Article written by Gašper Završnik and published in Delo on 03.04.2024, English translation by a member of JOS and @kurooscoffee, Proofread by IG GBoleyn123.

Coping with rising costs and crowded markets is a challenge for the whole industry.

The concert part of the music industry in the post-Covid era is characterised by the expansion of live performance. The long-suppressed desire to tour, to perform in front of audiences in as many countries as possible, is only this year being fully realised.

We took a look at how European touring is going in the new inflation-driven reality. This was one of the themes of the conference part of this year's Ment¹. The European concert market is facing many challenges, such as the rising costs of touring, organising concerts and festivals, increasing musician fees and, as a consequence, more and more expensive tickets. There is also the question of how to manage the concentration and congestion of concert venues and balancing the availability of the most sought-after artists. An additional problem is finding opportunities for new performers in such a competitive environment.

¹Ment is a showcase festival and music conference that happens every year in Ljubljana.

We also enquired about the European tours of Slovenian performers, two groups that have a different style and a different audience, Joker Out and Širom².

²We translated only the part of the article that was relevant to Joker Out.

Joker Out recently returned from a European Tour. As Kris Guštin told us, it was organised by “a booking agent from the Wasserman agency and our manager. The booking agent arranges the concerts, the conditions, and the dates, and then the manager comes up with all the logistics, that is, he arranges the transport, the accommodation, puts together a team and everything that needs to be done.” He says that tours have always been a big financial investment for performers. “Especially for performers of our size, who have only just started breaking into the European market, where the ticket sales often don’t make up for the costs of transit, accommodation, and the salaries of the performers and the team. The inflation over the past few years is of course making that even harder, but the musical market has slowly adapted to that with higher ticket prices.”

Joker Out had 19 concerts in 18 cities in 12 countries this year, and they have three more coming up in Great Britain. The ticket price for each concert is determined based on the size of the venue, how in-demand the artist is, the local standard, and the overall concert-going culture in a certain place.

Joker Out are very happy with how many people came to their concerts. “The turnout differed across Europe. In the countries we’re strong in, like Finland and the Netherlands, we played for crowds from 1500 to 2000 people, and for countries we haven't played in a lot yet, like Germany and France, we performed for 500 to 1000 people. The venues were always nicely filled and the audience was excited.”

We asked Guštin what they base the length of the tour on. “The length of the tour is based on demand, territory strategy, and how busy the performer is. In our case, we decided for a month-long tour, in which we covered a lot of countries that we couldn’t do last year,” he added.

[zvaigzdelasas]

The global market for carbon offsets is worth about $2 billion today and projected to grow to as much as $1 trillion in 15 years even as it faces fundamental questions about credibility and effectiveness. Add government appropriation to the list of risks for this climate solution. A shock announcement this week that Zimbabwe will take half of all revenues generated from offsets projects developed on its territory is a harbinger of an uncertain future in the carbon trade. The African nation is the world’s 12th largest creator of offsets, with 4.2 million credits from 30 registered projects last year, according to BloombergNEF.

Zimbabwe’s move gives the government control of carbon credit production and cancels all past agreements with international organizations. That means more revenue generated from credits tied to protecting forests and other efforts to cut emissions will flow into national coffers rather than going to project developers. There’s now risk that other countries might follow suit, creating new uncertainties for businesses that develop and sell offsets, corporations that purchase offsets as a way to counterbalance their greenhouse gas pollution and the cohort of traders who invest in this emerging asset class. [...]

The move “blindsided” CO2balance, a company that runs five carbon offset projects in Zimbabwe. “Everyone knew changes were happening but we weren’t expecting this — it wasn’t on the horizon,” said Paul Chiplen, head of sales, in an interview on Thursday. “It does put a question mark in investors’ minds when you’re not quite sure of what level of return you’re getting.” [...]

“I think it is an entirely understandable thing for Zimbabwe to want to take a proportion of the funds from any exports of carbon from its territory,” said Edward Hanrahan, director at carbon project developer Climate Impact Partners. “But the issue is they acted rapidly and without prior notice.”[...]

Each credit represents one ton of carbon dioxide and can be bought and sold many times before being used. The unregulated structure of the market involving companies, traders and governments creates risk of double counting. What if a government seeks to benefit by trading a credit produced in its territory after its been sold to an investor or used in a corporate sustainability plan?[...]

Treating carbon credits as just another export commodity underscores an imbalance at the heart of this global trade: Efforts to develop credits are usually funded by firms from wealthy countries and sold to corporate buyers in Europe and the US, yet most of the projects are located in emerging economies. This setup has been derided as a form of carbon colonialism that strips developing countries of an increasingly valuable resource. “Rushing to frame the decision by Zimbabwe as ‘nationalization risk’ exposes a sense of entitlement to access those resources by the global North,” said Rich Gilmore, chief executive officer at investment manager Carbon Growth Partners in Melbourne. “We need to acknowledge that the past 200 years of resource extraction have miserably failed people and the planet. And if we want the carbon market to scale, we need to respect the right of the nations of the south to determine their own rules.”[...]

Developers and investors might start to prioritize countries where governments have been transparent about their future carbon policies. Plus, if governments follow Zimbabwe in taking half of the project revenues, that will create a barrier to carbon projects that are the most costly to implement.[...]

It’s “entirely appropriate” for countries to seek a larger share from their carbon resources but they must “carefully consider the economics,” said Martijn Wilder, chief executive officer of Pollination, a climate advisory and investment firm. “If what’s left for a project developer is not sufficient to cover an investible rate of return, the project simply won’t happen.”

21 May 23

[dumb-teambucciarati-headcanons]

Giant snowball fight headcanons (but it’s all of passione and they aren’t trying to kill each other)

Giorno: he didn’t make an alliance with anyone and no one really knows what they should expect from him, and if they should be scared or not. He built a snow fort to hide in and attack from, and his plan is to leave it when there are not many people left so that he might be able to uncover who the boss is.

Bruno: also doesn’t have an alliance with anyone, but isn’t gonna get any of his team out. Uses sticky fingers to avoid snowballs and detaches his arm to send them flying further. He hides in trees to ambush people when they aren’t expecting it.

Abbacchio: he was the first one out and willingly, and now he is just drinking wine and enjoying the peace and quiet.

Mista: used the pistols to send the snowballs wherever he wants. Was in an alliance with Narancia and Trish. He got out really fast by one of his own snowballs.

Narancia: used Aerosmith to see where the others were and ambush them. Somehow managed to catch things on fire. Got out quickly because he is silly. He wanted to get Fugo out, but couldn’t find him.

Fugo: is hiding.

Trish: the only one in her alliance still in because everyone is too afraid to get out the bosses daughter. Also her ability to make things soft has been useful in getting missed snowballs to bounce back on people.

Polpo: is in jail, so they got him out pretty fast.

Zucchini or whatever his name was: Got out really fast. Was in an alliance with Sale of course. Narancia took him out right after Abbacchio got out.

Sale: is still in because he has been making the snowballs freeze mid air before they reach him. Is very afraid of Bruno because he has been hiding in them trees.

Formaggio: is small.

Illuso: he got out really fast by his teammates. They were mad at him because he left his hair in the shower drain.

Prosciutto: is in an alliance with Pesci and Risotto. He wanted to use his stand, but Risotto didn’t want to have to deal with wrinkles and back pains.

Pesci: very scared, he built a fort for himself to help protect him from the scary snowballs.

Melone: Ghiacco got him out really fast because he was being annoying.

Ghiacco: this is his territory. He doesn’t even need to make snowballs, his stand can provide them. Might actually win this.

Risotto: he started out being a really scary opponent, being able to turn invisible and all. But now he is cold and wants someone to get him out but everyone is too scared to.

Squalo and Tiziano: they are partners and they are on a date. Scary opponents but a little distracted. Built a snow shark together. Now they are eating chocolate. Not out yet though.

Carne: out so fast they barely remember him being there.

Scary chocolate man: has sent several people to the hospital already. Needs to be stopped.

Secco: isn’t allowed to melt the ground and is sad because of it. Hasn’t gotten anyone out yet because he is too busy complaining about not being allowed to use his stand.

Doppio: no one knows this kid is part of passione, but they let him join the fight because he really wanted to. He got out in the middle and is now playing Mario kart at home.

Diavolo (the boss): everyone is aware that he is playing, but they don’t know what he looks like or where he is. But they can see he hasn’t gotten out yet. He is at home because Doppio got out and is playing Mario kart. Wins by default.

[minamaybe]

There’s a saying at the University of Vienna: No matter how bad your studies are going, at least you’re not working for the Department of Parafolklore, right?

The select few who do research the strange, the unknown, the monstrous. Laughing stock or no, there’s records to modernise (“Why is the only piece of technology we own a fax machine?”), local cryptids to research, and, oh yeah, someone’s gotta babysit the demon in the attic.

genre: modern fantasy, elements of horror, some romance sprinkled in for good luck

status: plotting, making intricate mind maps

main characters

Nita: After her life took an unexpected turn for the worst, all Nita wants is a calm, quiet office job. It doesn’t get much calmer than typing up old records for the Department of Parafolklore; or at least, that’s what she thinks. Soon, Nita’s knowledge of obscure folk legends and Middle High German will be needed, because someone - no, something - is trapped in the attic. And it is essential that it doesn’t get out.

Lukas: Since no one has seen the Head of the Department of Parafolklore in… hm, has it been five years already?, Lukas is the next best thing, considering he’s been there the longest. Earnest and ambitious, he is determined to raise the Department’s social standing and show the world that their research is valuable.

Kim: Her years of studying Marketing & Sales have left Kim with a broken-off engagement and the ability to make pretty Instagram reels. As the Department’s social media manager, she tries to make dusty books and antisocial hermits look cool.

Said: An expert in art history and disappointing his parents, Said analyses artwork depicting various local legends and cryptids. He gets a tattoo of every folk creature the Department can prove truly exists (so far, he’s got a Lindwurm, Perchten, and the Mothman. That last one doesn’t necessarily fall into Austrian territory, but he chose to trust the Americans on that one).

“Oscar”: Really, he doesn’t know what all the fuss is about. They treat him as if he’s going to unleash chaos on the world as soon as he gets out of the Department, and that’s just so unfair. He can unleash plenty of chaos from right up here in the attic, thank you very much.

here it is, a proper wip intro! if you stuck around until now, thank you so much!

i’ve been working on this idea for a while now, and the basic plan is to tell austrian folklore stories through this group of outcasts, who, each in their own way, figures out what the paranormal world means to them, and their place in it. also, i want to try something new with it, and write connected short stories instead of going for a classical novel structure. this is new for me, so if anyone has experience with that kind of writing they want to share, i’d be very interested to hear your process!!

thank you for reading, and i can’t wait to share more about this wip as it develops! <3

[sanseterrer]

In the continuation of the previous post; the final part. Nevrev never moved anywhere. On May 3, 1904, on his birthday, in his seventy-fourth year of life, he shot himself. No one knows for sure why. From prolonged depression and despair, or because of poor sales of paintings and growing poverty, or because of housing problems: bailiffs were supposed to come to him on his last birthday, and there is a version that the artist saw in this «an ominous finger of fate». Or maybe everything combined to cause this tragic event.

He was buried as an unknown person at the crossroads between two villages, a couple of kilometers from Lyskovshchina. The church categorically did not want to bury him in the local cemetery. An oak nameless cross was placed on this grave, which was chosen after some time by a magpie from the nearest pan forest. She flew in, sat on it and chirped, as if drawing attention to the burial. Since there were various bad rumors about suicides in our superstitious people, they were afraid of them and therefore few people approached the grave. This place was also avoided because of the legends that appeared: the peasants allegedly saw Nevrev sitting in a chapel, walking under the windows of village houses and knocking on the windows with a cane - they say his soul could not find peace.

Lyskovshchina, as a village, is no longer there. The territory where it was located now attracts only tourists. Individual graves in the cemetery bear the names of people belonging to those ancestors who managed to catch those distant events for us. And, after more than a hundred years, the memory of the artist has survived both generations and time.

[somuchyoudontknow]

CAA is omnipresent?

A wonderful friend has dug up some interesting information that I am about to share about CAA.

Jan 2023: The move cements the separation of their assets from the pan-European Wild Bunch AG film group, which was created in 2015 out of the merger of their original French company Wild Bunch and Germany’s Senator Film and is now majority-owned by German entrepreneur Lars Windhorst. This means Wild Bunch AG no longer owns its 20% stake in the independent standalone international sales company Maraval and Chioua and their 15-strong team launched in 2019 under the banner of Wild Bunch International (WBI). The company is now been majority owned by Maraval and Chioua and its staff, with CAA also holding a 20% stake. The pair are in the process of securing a new name but the public dropping of the Wild Bunch moniker marks a decisive move for them and their team as they continue to build the new company.

DEADLINE: Wild Bunch International has existed as a standalone company since 2019. Why have you decided only now to split from the iconic brand name you created in 2002 but no longer own? BRAHIM CHIOUA: When we created Wild Bunch International in 2019, Wild Bunch took a 20% stake in exchange for allowing us to use the Wild Bunch brand in our name under a signed three-year agreement. We had a second commercial cooperation deal for the same period under which Wild Bunch International continued to sell and manage Wild Bunch’s international catalogue for a fee, and also had access to the group’s back-office services, for which we paid a fee. This deal came to an end in November 2022 with a get-out clause for both parties. We opted to buyout Wild Bunch’s equity share.

DEADLINE: You have always worked closely with CAA. How does this move impact your relationship with the agency?

MARAVAL: CAA has been an historical partner and they allowed us to start the new company three years ago. Our relationship is probably one we are the most proud of because this goes beyond a simple business relationship. Together with Roeg Sutherland’s team, we built a unique business model of synergies and connection in term of promotion, financing , talent representation that benefit the talent and the producers we are working with such as Alice Diop, Nadine Labaki, Claire Denis, Rebecca Zlotowski, Ladj Ly, Jacques Audiard or Gaspar Noé for example.

DEADLINE: As well as continuing to work on international sales, the new company seems more directly involved in producing... MARAVAL: International sales is no longer our only activity. We’re much more involved as active co-producing partners whether it’s through Le Collectif 64 or Wild West. It’s not like in the past when a company such as Fidelité would come to us with a film, and we would say ‘yes’ or ‘no’. Now, we participate in the development, financing and packaging of projects. Changes in the industry meant we had to reformat ourselves. We don’t have to sell the films produced by Getaway Films, Wild West or Le Collectif 64 because with those companies we’re wearing a co-producer hat with an active role. We need to find the best solution for each film, which won’t necessarily involve us selling it internationally on a territory basis.

Source:

It's interesting that WBI separated from WB AG in November 2022.

In the end of March 2023 they revealed their new name Goodfellas

February 2023: Still WBI has boarded sales on Amelia's children

November 2021: Former NBCUniversal Vice Chairman and CAA Co-Founder Ron Meyer Named CEO of Wild Bunch

So, CAA has 20% stake at Goodfellas (former WBI), their partner WB AG is run by a former CAA co-founder Ron Meyer. Another ex-CAA co-founder Michael Ovitz is one of Jinx partners. Omnipresent CAA

More about WB AG:

It looks like transatlantic cooperation, that's why pairing up an American actor and a European actress makes sense to attract not only domestic but also an international audience. As we know Chris is not well-known in Europe, if he wants more international fame and financing for the Kelly project from a non-US company, this pr rl might be a good chance for him.

Industry people have been informed about WBI and WB AG deal since 2019, Seb and Aly, Chris and Lily, and now Chris and Alba appeared in 2020. Actresses are from Europe.

The industry is changing due to many factors. Chris is trying to survive like many actors. He doesn't have his Marvel role too. It's a new start for him, he needs to build a solid foundation. Industry-wise, he is not RDJ or DJ, he doesn't have a pull to make people go to watch his movies as a lead, he needs pr.

Chris' case is also different because of Amelia's children and his 2 movies. And we don't know about Jinx marketing plans.