#SORRY I DIDNT MEAN TO RAMBLE ON I JUST. HAVE A LOT OF IT BUILT UP LIKE CRAZY i feel like a pressure cooker 😭😭😭

[transgaysex]

hey, i saw your post about frustrations with family and i hope this isn't weird/unwanted, and you dont need to answer this or anything, but i just wanted to say that i really resonated with it as someone who has to constantly be the glue in my fam as the eldest sibling with the expectations that i understand both "sides" between my parents and siblings enough to mediate. youre not alone in how you feel and i am sincerelywishing the best for you!!!

this isnt unwanted or weird at all !!! its a bit comforting knowing im not alone in it and i really appreciate the sentiment actually 🥺 im wishing the very best for you as well chief !!!

[itsss4t4n]

Mi Vida - Leo Valdez x fem!reader

Request? Yes @nothankyou543

"Can you do Connor Stoll or Leo Valdez x fem reader just cuddling in the morning after they wake up "

warnings: none, one kiss, no use of Y/n, spanish swear words, bad spanish

a/n: Firstly sorry this took a few days, i had a lot of school stuff this week and i also forgot how hard writing actually is. The spanish in this fic is mostly google translated so i apologize if something is wrong. And again english isnt my first lanuage.

"Mierda!" 

You groan slightly and try to push further into the mattress. The quiet clanging and clinking of metal apruptly stops for a few seconds.

When you dont make another sound or move ,the noise starts up again.

Without moving, you slightly open your eyes to peer over at Leos desk. There he sits, still in his spiderman pyjamas, probably working on a new invention. His desk is full of small metal pieces. Bronze cogs, rods and plates are strewn all over and its impossible to make out what he is currently working on. 

Your eyes shift to the bronze alarm clock, that Leo built 2 weeks ago, and you groan once again.

7.38 AM.

Leo stops his clanging once again and looks over at you. 

"Good morning mi amor" His face stretches into a big smile. A smile thats not quite his almost cocky signature 'Leo smile'. Its a lot softer and filled with love. And most importantly, its exclusively reserved for you.

"Sorry, didnt mean to wake you up." his smile turns slightly more apologetic.

He gets up while wiping his hands on the already dirty rag that hangs of the back of his chair. 

"Its fine", you grumble while turning over onto your back, "Why are you up this early?"

Smiling sheepishly Leo climbs back into bed, clumsily hitting his shin on the bedframe while doing so. A small yelp leaves his lips, making you huff out a small laugh. "Shut up" he softly shoves your head back into the pillow making you laugh more.

Leo finally gets situated as you calm down your laughing, his head proped up on his hand while his other arm sits around your waist, pulling you closer to him.

"Just couldnt sleep anymore and was bored", he softly answers your question. You hum in reply, enjoying having him close to you once again. "Again sorry for waking you up, hermosa", he mumbles into your hair, pressing a kiss to your hairline. 

Pressing into his touch, you once again hum. "No really, you're fine." Pullin your head away slightly you look up at him and ask "So what were you working on?"

Leo's Face lights up immediately at you showing interest in his inventions, and launches into a detailed explaination of the machine he was currently working on. 

While talking Leo gesticulates wildly with the hand that was previously on your waist, the hand that previously propped his head up snaking under your head and to your back, pulling you into him again.

This was something you loved about leo: his constant need for physical touch. No matter what, he would always be touching you, whether it was holding your hand, having his hand around your waist or your shoulders , laying his hand on your knee when you where sitting next to each other or even just sitting or standing as close to you as humanly possible.

You cuddle into him again, tilting your head up to look at him, a fond smile spreading over your face. 

Leo looks down at you and stops in his ramble about something not working as it should and looks at you questioningly .

"What?"

"Nothin, just admirin you, Guapo.", you aswer, makin Leo smile at the little spanish nickname. He's always loved when you used the little spanish that you knew, especially if it were terms of endearment like this.

" You're one to talk, hermosa" , he grinnes before tilting his head down and pressing a soft kiss to your lips.

You kiss back and slightly smile into it. 

Its not a long, heated kiss. Its small, soft and full of love. 

When you part again, he places a small peck on the tip of you nose before cuddling back into you and pressing his face in your hair again.

"Te amo, mi vida"

"I love you too, cariño "

(translations: mierda= shit, mi amor= my love, hermosa= beautiful, guapo= handsome, cariño= darling/sweety/honey/dear, Te amo= I love you, mi vida= my life )

[mihai-florescu]

enstars analyses uhmmm i think we should spend more time talking about what dreams mean to characters ^^ it is In The Name. but i mostly think about how ritsu's issues with emotional dependency and wilfulness, all this stuff where he plays up his emotionality (??) are both result of and like an.. acting out of ... trauma from being u know. a chronically ill kid. with an absent family? and literally like two people who would visit him? and the isolation he would understandably feel; and the dependence he would have on those only points of connection--and he can't control those--i think it's interesting and i love ritsu. it's like, sometimes he acts like he chose to be how he is but a lot of it is out of his hands. hi i hope the rest of ur day goes well :>

Disclaimer post writing an answer, my mind drifted away while writing and i ended up just kinda Pondering and Rambling. Im sorry if it seems a bit scattered and all over the place, that's my mind rn. Ok, let's see what i actually said now.

Sometimes i think about how the war wouldnt have played out the same had rei never left ritsu to try to find doctors and cures for him (which led to breaking the promise of staying with ritsu that ultimately changed everything in their relationship forever). I wonder if rei would have ever even been in the cemetary and met keito had he just stayed to take care of ritsu. I also wonder if keito and rei would ever bond about having someone dear to them be sick. And had rei stayed, ritsu wouldnt have been upset and willing to give eichi advice on how to take him down. Would there had even been a war if Keito hadnt met Rei, or if the student council hadnt figured out how to send rei away. Would rei even be a protagonist if he hadnt left ritsu, if he had just stayed home in obscurity as well (i dont think so, and the story is built on the existence of these extraordinary characters, by the characters who arent, but are willing to make their way into the narrative nevertheless and achieve their dreams) One action's ripple effects etcetc.

Sorry i realise this was got way off topic from your original ask. I think i will continue to be off topic because i cant stop the train of thought ive embarked upon at this tardy post midnight time. I think eichi and ritsu are an underrated duo... they helped each other take steps towards their dreams afterall. During checkmate eichi giving a harsh wakeup call to ritsu in regard to being in his brother's shadow unless he does something himself to prove he's alive (top 10 eichi mean moments where he's also projecting onto the other person his own issues... not that he was wrong, but still). And in black tea, ritsu advising eichi on the war preparations during tea club (a serene setting in what was otherwise a hellish place, a piece of an everyday normal students life, which eichi craved so much his whole life. And ritsu also needed the club, interacting with new people, let alone another chronically ill kid).

Im thinking about your last sentence and how ritsu clung to the vampire persona the family adopted, the way to cope with the hereditary disability. As opposed to rei who changed his persona and struggled with the way he was perceived as a monster, when he was a human just as much as everyone else and tried to ignore his disability even? I dont think ignore is the best word. Downplay. It was always the acknowledgement that ritsu had it worse, despite the fact that rei also had it, he was looking for a cure for ritsu instead. First instance and development of his habit of helping people when they dont necessarily even ask for it. But yes anyway millions of tangents aside, ritsu clinging on to the vampire persona tighter and more consistently in his character, as a coping mechanism with a condition he didnt ask for, that is outside his hands. The one thing that was in his power was choosing to play into the vampire persona.

I havent even touched on mao... to be fair i dont think im the most qualified person to speak on him, or his relationship with ritsu. I am still figuring out my thoughts on them. Im glad they grew to find their own dreams in yumenosaki (heh), in the same realm, but not tied to each other where it gets suffocating.

I wouldnt call anything i said analysis as i wouldve probably ordered things better and had, well, an actual point, but i hope my stream of conciousness was as fun for you to read as it was for me to just think and type

[shiraishi--kanade]

(in reply to the aphantasia answer (it wouldnt fit in a comment and i do have one or two follow-ups if you dont mind)) (edit post-writing: this is such a long ask LMAO no pressure to answer all of it)

oh this is so interesting…. im a very visual person (to an unfortunate extent) so i think we’re opposites in regards to reading interests- i adore extensive metaphors and elaborate descriptions of actions/worldbuilding. it makes a lot of sense that to-the-point stuff works better for you though- also your explanations on the ‘mathematical’ approach were excellently written, thank you :)

since you said you mostly rely on aural senses when it comes to thought processes, do you think youre more of an auditory learner then? or is it just the case where it’s useful mostly for reading?

also,, because you have to rely so much on figuring out meaning and the ‘why’ and the purpose of descriptions, do you think you have a better or worse understanding of body language and what to look for as opposed to the ‘average’ person / how it would’ve been given you didnt have aphantasia? im mostly asking in the context of interpersonal interaction

also also please dont worry about rambling on for however long youd like (or even expressing/explaining things outside of the given question) unless it’s something you’re uncomfortable doing — learning about people like this is something i take a lot of genuine enjoyment from, so in a way this is a bit of a selfish act akdhajs

Interesting questions! Let's see what I can tell haha

1. I'm actually a little conflicted about the "learner styles" since, as far as I'm aware, it has been debunked as a myth a while ago. Now I'm not a psychologist, I just study it on a higher education level (as a part of my major), but regardless I don't think it works that way? I think we're confusing the ability to recall information (memory) and the actual process of understanding and applying information, because of how much our educational systems, as well as understanding of "education" in general, has been built on reproduction of the the information instead of applying or analysing it. While the ability to recall, I think, might vary by person to person basis, the actual process of learning seems to be more or less uniform. In the latter sense I am like a majority of people, and am best learning through application of skill. But if we're talking about which type of memory (= therefore remembering information) works best for me, then yeah, probably auditory with tactile as a close second. With that said I never found it particularly helpful with studying, only that in my observation if the information is solely presented in visual way (e.g graphs and stuff) then it often will go over my head completely. I think aphantasia is definitely more hindering than anything when it comes to learning, I haven't noticed any particular benefits? But eh, might be different for different people!

2. In interpersonal interaction? Absolutely worse, but I don't think it's because aphantasia necessarily as much as due to the fact that I have ✨autism✨ (which I think might likely be misdiagnosed adhd or audhd neurotype. And I'm also not diagnosed officially. I was 6 when my mom was told I "probably" had Asperger's and that's it pretty much. But hey I'll take it as a credible evidence). Although the two might be linked.

Back to the point, I just really suck at being a person in general because of it. I have no idea what it's like to not be neurodivergent so I can't say with confidence if I would be better or worse off with interpreting body language/facial expressions if I only had aphantasia, unfortunately.

Those are a very non-answer answers. Sorry. (⁠๑⁠•⁠﹏⁠•⁠)

[shkika]

I might end up taking u up on that offer this is so so soo fun

I really enjoy it when people make moon mad at fp..like how could she not be yes she cares about fp a lot but siblings don't exactly...do that to eachother very often I think (but maybe they do /j the woes of being an only child)

I think not being able to harm artificer did him good in the end (therapy dog!!) like he would have definitely just wanted to send that thing FLYING into the sun but he couldn't!! he was forced to just deal with it and eventually he realises hey. Maybe this thing isn't so bad... honestly I think he really needed something like that right then given his tendency to push people away (thinking abt how he BLEW UP srs' poor overseer. That made me jump actually i didnt expect it i sat still for long enough to get myself blown up too it was kind of funny...aside from the trek back of course) (ALSO THE ADS HELP thats golden)

Adding onto that like....him being a silly little loser that wants to do everything by himself and the like loving the attention etc I really think that like... the time period he was built in only made it worse??

Like......i feel that being built when he was added to a sort of pressure of needing to feel superior, to not be one of those bugs in mazes. To have something with like a genuine true path ahead instead of blindly grasping for answers

Like...I guess he'd want to prove just how good he is by doing it without any sort of help and he just has so MUCH to figure out by himself that he just...builds that pressure more and more and that's gotta be too much at some point

^^ I like the idea of the triple affirmative stuff happening like...around this point in time (forgive me if my timeline is terribly off) but anyways like..it kind of just fucks up everything for the dude...like all he's worked for is kinda just for nothing so then it leads to everything with the rot as like some sort of last resort. Like he knows the risks but he just cant bring himself to care like he's in such a vunerable state he doesn't think about how it'd affect moon until all of a sudden there's a forced message being sent his way, but even then I guess being younger than like everyone in the group he doesn't fully grasp like oh. This is as bad as it is. Until moons can comes crashing down and hes left infecting himself with the stuff

Anyway you are so very right with the echo actually I haven't thought very much on the shaded citadel but it must have...not been pleasant going through the rains knowing that there's so many others unaffected by it

Sorry this response is so late actually I've been multitasking to all hell but RRAGHGJ squishing the iterators in my hand like stress balls I am so normal about this game

please do! <3 ramble incoming

Moon being angry at Pebbles is fun. I love seeing different interpertations! Though I do think she doesn’t hold actual bitterness towards him in my personal belief.

The idea that she isn’t actually *angry* angry at him makes her very tragic to me. By all means she knows his actions are inexcusable. What she went through was horrifying and painful and she acknowledges that. Nsh even mentions she’s always had way too much patience for him and that she really tried to be a good big sister to him.

So as his big sister and someone who guided him in early days I can see her being unable to feel spite towards him. He fucked up, hes now sick and rotting and it all fills her with grief. It’s all just unfortunate and sad! (definitely see moon being a little hater with salty comments sometimes. as she does but most of her anger is reserved for their shitty parents)

Pebbles desperately wanting to feel superior is something really fun to me!! Absolutely see it! (idk why u went and became close friends with guy who called you dumb and naive but u do you 🤷 maybe u like that. likr OoOo hes the only one that listens to my theories and he calls me dumb <33) We know he learns about what happened to sliver from suns, so I can only assume that happened before he was made..? But the game is vague enough for u to hc it as you want honestly.

What he did was out of desperation for sure! He never wanted to even involve Moon according to what he says while commenting on a pearl by Arti. It was just kind of impossible.

I think what Suns told him just left a big scar on the poor guy. Not only is he being told he never mattered, he has to accept he’ll slowly break down and not even die while still trying to solve their issue he doesn’t even care about. He wanted the feeling of power over his own self back and he wanted to desperately escape. Feeling helpless is the worst.

He thought he could be fast enough and not harm Moon and then failed! He doomed her and got a very bad case of the rot ( consequences of my actions) ((another bracket but the poor fucker tried to cure himself all the way until arti campaign! sad!!)) along with his failure becoming gossip material and a sensation as we learn from spearmaster logs. Which is why I assume he closes all communications.

Also Moon forced many many broadcasts onto him while dying :) not only partly the reason why he failed the project, it also further cemented his helplesness.. because he can’t do anything to help! A common phrase you hear from him is “I can’t even help myself”.

It’s a little treat in almost all scug campaigns iirc.

Also echoes are all so interesting I love them and their silly little opinions. Shout out to the one who told arti to stop being such an angry bitch <3

[denkamis]

hi!! could i get double chocolate and cherry with kaminari, shinsou and midoriya please?❤️

idk if i did this right so im sorry if i didnt!

to anon: hey anon, no worries! you did it perfectly :)) aww i love the characters you chose for this prompt, this is adorable. enjoy some fluffy times with these sleep deprived boys from a very sleep deprived writer <3

warnings: none! just some swearing and some bad sleeping habits lmao. reader is gn!

prompt: denki kaminari, hitoshi shinsou, izuku midoriya scenarios + “it’s okay, i couldn’t sleep anyways.”

denki kaminari

denki stays up late playing osu and minecraft

what can i say, he’s just a gamer man

so he’s honestly pretty reliable when it comes to you knocking on his door at late hours of the night

always the biggest cuddle bug, really happy that you go to him first out of everyone

literally drops everything for you hehe

lots of sleepy kisses too

“fuck! goddammit,” denki grumbled, shaking out his wrist as he had just failed the six star version of the intro of blend-s on osu. he had gotten rather addicted to the circle clicking game. this further resulted in denki staying up late on school nights, despite kirishima’s warnings of him potentially falling asleep in class the next day. it was fine, he could always borrow notes from you or jirou anyways!

as he went to restart the map again, a soft knock came at the door to his dorm room. spinning off his computer room chair, he prepared himself to be lectured by aizawa for the fifth time this week about breaking curfew. “aizawa-sensei, i know that i’ve been loud lately but i swear this time it won’t happen- y/n?” he stopped mid-sentence as he saw you standing on the other side of the door. “what are you doing up so late?”

you shook your head, immediately hugging his torso instead. you were clearly a bit distraught about something, but denki wasn’t a mind reader. he figured that from the way you were clinging onto him, it must have been a bad dream of some kind. “hey, hey, easy there! nearly knocked me over, huh,” denki laughed lightly, pressing a soft kiss to the side of your head before closing the door behind you. you clung onto him, face buried in the crook of his neck. it made a small blush dust across his cheeks, a warm feeling spreading through his arms as he held you close. “i hope i’m not bothering you,” you mumbled, to which denki hummed. “you never bother me, babe. it’s okay, i couldn’t really sleep anyways.”

the two of you stayed like that for a long while, denki swaying the two of you back and forth. you could feel gentle lips peppering the crown of your head with kisses. as your heart rate slowed, denki piped up. “wanna stay here for the night? my bed’s missing out on some action! and by some action, i mean sleep. i really can’t sleep.”

you snorted at his words, your eyes flicking up to his goofy yet endearing smile, his eyes bright yet a bit tired from late night gaming. he poked his tongue out at you, making you roll your eyes with a tiny smile of your own gracing your features.

“how could i say no to that?”

hitoshi shinsou

we already know he’s up at these unholy hours

not for any particular reason, just because he can’t really sleep

quite the insomniac that one

and the fact that he can’t sleep properly or well unless you’re with him

you smell like lavender in the morning too bc he puts it in his pillow to help him sleep, thank you

shinsou lay awake in bed, eyes trained on the ceiling as he waited for himself to fall asleep. it was no secret that he barely got any rest, so it was simply easier to just sit and wait until his body exhausted itself to the point where he simply fell asleep. staying as still as he could, he kept counting the amount of times he breathed in and out. it made him acutely aware of his surroundings. the crickets outside his room, the way the moonlight streamed through his blinds, the miscellaneous creaking sounds of the dorms. yeah, he definitely wasn’t sleeping tonight.

he didn’t flinch as the door to his room opened, blinking slowly as his eyes adjusted to the light spilling into his room along with a new figure. “y/n?” he asked, not bothering to sit up. “hey, are you up? sorry toshi, i couldn’t sleep,” you explained softly, allowing the door to close behind you as you tiptoed across his dorm room. his hair was sprawled across his pillow, deep violet locks hiding his hands situated behind his head comfortably. it showed off his arms that were built from training for when, not if, he ever got into the hero course.

a lazy smile crossed his lips at your words, his heartstrings being played by you so seamlessly. “it’s okay, i couldn’t sleep anyways,” he replied with a tilt of his head towards you. he moved over a bit in his bed as to give you space to lay down next to him. you crawled beneath his comforters, inhaling the scent of lavender as you did. apparently shinsou had said that the smell helped him fall asleep easier. strong arms wrapped around your waist, encasing you in a protective embrace as your head rested comfortably against his chest. the comforter was thrown over the two of you. you felt so much safer already.

his large hands were placed on your lower back, his thumbs drawing lazy circles on your skin as his breathing began to relax noticeably. hiding your smile, you cuddled closer to him. to this day, you had never seen shinsou fall asleep so quickly since that night.

izuku midoriya

baby is up studying for a test that’s in like 2 weeks

either that or he’s on an all might video spree on youtube and no that is not the first time this has happened, it is certainly not the last

he has so many stuffed animals in his room probably, like he just has them stuffed in his closet

the all might plushies stay on the bed tho

his cuddles are unmatched tho, change my mind

izuku was pacing around his room, vocabulary words spinning about his mind as he counted them on his fingers. he was mumbling definitions to himself, going over all of them in his head before referencing his notebook to make sure nothing went wrong. amidst his ramblings, a knock at the door made him jump to attention. “come in?” he called out, watching intently as he saw you come into view. his face showed relief, grateful to know it wasn’t aizawa or kacchan complaining about his incessant pacing.

“would it be alright if i sleep here tonight? i’m worrying about my grades and stuff again,” you rubbed the back of your neck with a small smile, trying to play off your question as relaxed as you could. it wasn’t exactly a secret that you had a crush on the boy in front of you. he was kind and humble, wanting to help as many people as he could despite all the circumstances that had the world against him. it was admirable. even now, he looked so concerned from the clear lack of sleep you’ve been getting these past few days. “of course you can sleep here. ah, wait! i have to, ah,” he stumbled over his words as you looked to the bed to see not one, not even two, but four all might stuffed toys on his bed.

“oh.”

midoriya’s face erupted with crimson, shoving the plushies into his closet as he sputtered out various excuses as to why they were there in the first place. when he turned back to you, you were giggling. not at him, but because of the entire situation in general. “you’re adorable, izu,” you told him gently. a light feeling bloomed in his chest upon seeing the smile you held for him. you looked so undeniably beautiful to him, the way your hair was a bit messy and how you stood in your pyjamas. while others, including yourself, would find that you looked completely normal, midoriya loved seeing you be so casual, so comfortable around him.

“you’re sure i’m not interrupting you, though?”

midoriya returned your smile with his own, stepping forward to intertwined his scarred fingers with your delicate ones. “it’s okay,” he murmured softly, holding your hand as if you were the most precious thing in the world to him, “i couldn’t really sleep anyways.”

all works © denkamis 2021.

tags:

@meilbox @honeykami @httpfirx @strawberrysalwa @hey-i-really-miss-you @smexy-goose @satis-kei

want to be on the taglist? see this post!

[enderspawn]

op I am pleading for you to talk about c!Schlatt I keep getting interrogated for saying c!Schlatt was the best president and he really didn't do anything super terribly wrong please talk about him

i mean... im sorry anon but idk abt best PRESIDENT. manburg under schlatt.... kind of sucked imo JFKDLSJFKL

1. manburg had massive food shortages, to the point the average citizen (including fundy) had to eat spider eyes to survive.

2. he imposed ludicrious tax of his civillians (namely niki. we dont know if he did that to Every Business like w fundy or if he targeted niki specifically bc of her closeness to the ex-president, but neither is good)

3. exiled those who he saw as political opponents to keep his power

4. straight up ignored his cabinet a lot of the time to make his own decisions (such as destroying the white house, which led to quackity leaving)

5. was widely hated by all the citizens. literally at one point all the ppl left in manburg was schlatt and jack manifold (who was MIA on the server and left to found Manifold Land when he came back)

6. held a public execution, AGAIN without the consent or knowledge of his cabinet (IF I REMEMBER RIGHT. i know big q opposed the execution at minimum, but idk for sure if he knew it was planned at all before the festival)

7. was basically at war his entire presidency thanks to pogtopia's existence

and thats just what i can think of rn! the reasons i like c!schlatt are fully based around him as a character and HIS personal development, not around his policies or actions. especially when compared to the other two presidents, who either won or prevented a war and kept the majority of its citizens happier and healthier than Manburg, he's.... probably the worst president they had tbh

BUT since you gave me an excuse to ramble abt him anyway, i wanna go on abt what i DO like abt him (under a cut bc this post is already kinda long oops) but

tldr; i like schlatt bc of his relationships with others, his flaws and pitiable moments, and how he is a fantastic parallel/foil to the characters around him

I like his complex (and yes, abusive) relationship with quackity, especially after his death and quackity's feelings flipping rapidly between hating him and missing him. but before that they did have a honeymoon-esque period-- at least from quackity's view.

watching their date you get the idea schlatt mightve never really been interested in him and mightve just been using quackity's interest in him for his own advancement! but we dont know.

maybe he did truly love quackity in his own fucked up way in the end, even if he wasnt a good person. maybe he regrets his actions and cruelty. or maybe he doesnt.

in the end they were (like the animatic i linked said) "built from the same dirt", they're both incredibly ambitious and prideful people and parallel each other a LOT (see: q's need for power, his want to execute ranboo paralleling tubbos execution, etc). they're not good for one another, but i love seeing just how they fall apart together (i hope you die, i hope we both die kind of beat)

and.... god his relationship and impact w fundy i could ramble abt all day dude. fundy kept schlatt's sword after his death and calls it an heirloom. we dont know 100% how old fundy was when wilbur was exiled (i mena... he ran for president but current fundy is like 20something and tommy ALSO ran as vp at 16) but we can assume he was a late teen. his own father was gone, but schlatt... seemed to CARE. he showed him affection.

fundy's never truly felt like hes BELONGED anywhere (even the country his father said was all for him, he felt ostracized and made different by his fathers doting babying) and because of that hes always looking for a group to be a part of. hes a people pleaser (its part of why hes so easy for big q to get for las nevadas).

and schlatt GIVES him that feeling of belonging he deserves. hes a spy the entire time, yes, but he becomes conflicted about it as time goes on.

could schlatt just be using fundy and filling his head with empty praise? sure, i couldnt fault you at all for that interpretation, its perfectly valid. BUT, i dont think so. he seemed genuinely shocked to see fundy oppose him on nov 16th. remember, he didnt know fundy was a spy.

in that moment he realizes just HOW alone he is and always has been. and its a tragic moment: the last person he had, the person he himself mightve truly CARED about left him just like everyone else. he was alone, truly and fully. even his allies were only there out of obligation and bc of him paying.

he knows his health has been failing him. he cant even swim due to muscular issues but he refuses see a doctor about it because he refuses to let himself be seen as weak.

hell, one could argue that issue leads to his abraisive and abusive behavoir in relationships: he refuses to let himself be true and genuine to anyone, there always has to be a wall and a proud perfect persona. its part of why hes a great villain both in narrative and to watch as a casual fan: just like c!wilbur, he's playing an act.

hes a foil and a parallel to wilbur. both are men who hide their true selves behind a certain role or persona they feel they have to play while they hide their crumbling health (schlatt's more physical and wilbur's more mental). both experience their rise and fall. but wilbur isnt despised, even if he thinks he is, while schlatt isnt truly loved by anyone, even if he thinks he is.

most of all, their deaths couldnt be more different. wilbur went out with a bang. a large dramatic scene fit for a storybook, with a long monologue and cinematic final blow ALL made to fit how he saw himself in a story and simply filling a required roll. but schlatts death is practically overlooked (especially in comparison to wilburs death and everything else that happened that day).

he built his entire persona about being this massive, larger than life powerful guy but he died small, weak, and frail to his own failing body. its... pitiful, honestly. it doesnt feel fitting, it feels wrong. his life up that point demanded drama, but his death was nothing more than... an accident, almost. unintentional. clumsy. its fucking brilliant.

[angeldormante]

Hi!! Im the Leo-withdrawal anon! I didnt ask anything prior to the one you just answered, but I'm so happy you responded! I'd honestly listen to anything you write--I think you have a wonderful way of expressing yourself, and the way you write is just... *chef's kiss* I guess, a question I'd have for you is this: What sort of hobbies do you headcanon our fearless leader to have? Quirks? Both endearing and... less so? I think that'd be a fun start!

hokay.... finally getting around to this!! sorry for the wait and thank you for bearing with me, anon! (ty for the compliment, too -- i'm very flattered jfjflk i just like talking about turtles ok (•̥ ̫ •̥) )

now... lemme talk blue to ya.

if we're talking about hobbies, well. stop me if you think you've heard this before -- leo loves training. for all of the guys, ninjutsu is a way of life; it's how they survive the world, how they connect with themselves and one another; it's their entire culture that the foundations of their family is built upon. and that's super neat. but watch 2k3 for like, one episode, and you'll very quickly see that the only one that fully leans into it is leo. mikey and don have their own interests that they often can't get to quickly enough once the day's training session ends. i think raph actually enjoys training recreationally as well -- but he's more interested in the physical aspect, spending his energy, bulking up, not necessarily focusing on skill or technique. i like to imagine that growing up, leo and raph spent a lot of time in the dojo together doing their own thing, kind of "separate but together"; before casey came along and raph got into hanging out topside with him.

leo, though, he throws himself fully into training. he's incredibly dedicated to it not only because of his sense of responsibility, but because he genuinely enjoys it -- he enjoys improving his technique, his skill. he enjoys the repetition of learning, which helps to calm and center him. he enjoys meditation, which helps him focus and clear his mind. as an introvert, and precisely because his family doesn't hang around the dojo as often as he does, leo's solo training time is his time -- it's his chance to relax and decompress. i think it's exactly why he spiraled harder and harder in season 4 no matter how much training he did: at that point, it was no longer a hobby, but an obsession. leonardo normally uses training as a healthy outlet, but when he channeled his exodus trauma into it, he removed his main method of decompression and replaced it with the intent to fuel that exact trauma. (sidebar, though i've talked about it before: i also feel like this is why fast forward is so excellent at showing leo's character growth. he is extremely zen and such a huge advocate of healthy self-reflection in the way he coaches cody and his clone. my sweet boy, so proud of him in that season.)

now i know what you may be thinking. and you're right. there's more to leo than his life in the dojo... so let's talk about some other hobbies i like to think he has!

so here's the thing, and i think it's something else i've touched on before... but i think leo actually has a very strong bond with donnie. their temperaments are very similar, they feel similar burdens when it comes to protecting the family, etc... and to be honest, i think they bond a lot over the same nerdy hobbies too! i think leo is a huge freaking nerd.

i legit think that donatello has probably absorbed his brother into more than one of his hobbies, both unwillingly and not. some things click for leo, and some things don't. some things he has a hard time getting into until he discovers a certain aspect of it or views it from a different perspective. but he is very often willing to try anything.

for example, i imagine that growing up, leo and don played a lot of chess together. don used to overwhelmingly win, until they got older and older leo got deeper and deeper into the tactical aspect, and soon he was beating don quite soundly more often than he wasn't. don started getting into engineering manuals and physics books, while leo started getting into history texts and military treatises, but both shared a love for novels and would swap their favorites regularly. and they still play chess, of course.

don got into nerdy sci-fi shows. like, really into them. and leo couldn't quite pick up the thread on that one, but he was content to endure every fourth movie night when it was don's turn to pick. and slowly he began getting drawn into it, the same way anyone does -- he enjoyed the campiness of the plot, how absolutely ludicrous the fight choreography was, how sometimes there were actually deep and thoughtful moments. it was both a welcome respite from the intensity of his reality and something he could put to practical use if he had to, like, steal a spaceship one day, though the odds of that happening seemed pretty low⁽ˡᵒˡ⁾. he was never able to quote any of the episodes verbatim like donnie, but it was something they could discuss and lightly bicker about during the times when leo is mindlessly helping out around don's lab. (more on that in a sec.)

also? i can absolutely. totally. easily see leo as a tabletop game enthusiast. i think i'll refrain from getting lost in the weeds on that once, since this is already starting to run long, but i just want to put that in your mind. tmnt dnd gaming nights. let that sit for a second.

okay moving on.

i genuinely think that leo just likes existing in the general vicinity of his family and extended family. not necessarily doing anything; just being there, doing something with his hands. if don is working on a project, leo may drift in, and don will ask him to hand him certain tools or read aloud certain notes on the screen, because he knows the deal. if raph is lifting weights and leo wanders over from his own training session, raph may ask him to spot, or set up the next pair of weights, because he knows how it is. if mikey is sitting in the living room playing video games and leo appears on the couch next to him, he might toss him a controller, or he may just start blabbering about what game he's playing and what level he's on, because he's got it. if april and casey are tidying up her shop for a new shipment of merchandise and leo just randomly appears in the window, feathered duster in hand, april smiles and puts on water for tea and casey teases him and throws him a broom instead without blinking. because that's just how leo is.

the thing is, leo is one of those people who have such a strong presence that -- as long as he's not trying to hide it, of course -- you know he's there because he carries such an atmosphere with him. on the other hand, leonardo is the type of person who is genuinely content to just be in the background. which may sound totally at odds with the whole leader schtick, but i think it's just kind of this duality he has: he can be both at the forefront and in the background, depending on the situation and what is needed from him. does this mean he doesn't have his own hobbies or interests? of course not! but even canonically, throughout the series leo is shown to be just as happy with his hands off the reins so long as there's not a mission in front of him. and i think it's precisely this lack of that constant need for control that shows just how whole and rich leo's inner life is, how he feels full and complete without his leadership/big brother role completely defining him, and how season 4 rips that carpet from under his feet to show the unhealthy side of that particular coin.

so as much as a cop-out answer it may sound like -- i think that leo just enjoys doing things with his brothers. he likes rooftop runs with them. he likes pizza and cards with them. he likes movies, sports, and games with them. but he's also his own person, and he enjoys being in his head, and he has hobbies that help him make his head a healthy place to be; his family absolutely respects that quality, and leonardo is a much more well adjusted person for it.

er.... i didn't really get into quirks or bad habits, but this has run really long already and it's getting late, lmao. so i think i will stop here for now. =w= thank you for letting me ramble again about my blue boy, anon; i know i'm slow, but hopefully i rambled enough to make up for it!

[spikescrispyblondehair]

Ya know, I've been thinking about why a lot of the goth stuff I used to love doesnt appeal to me much anymore- looking through my old pinterest fashion board is just sort of... eh... to me as of late, and I havent listened to the old goth bands much either. It's kind of sad, and I wondered if I was getting over goth. After proudly proclaiming it wasnt a phase and I'd always be this way for so long, it's kind of upsetting! But I came to a realization-

Everything I used to really "LOVE" about goth is the influencer shit that was sold to me as a teen, and the bits of the subculture that love to hate everything and everyone. The "I dont have to look the part or listen to the music or anything I can just IDENTIFY as goth!! Bigit!!" And the "if you dont listen to three bands no ones heard of and know the personal lives of their band members burn in hell for calling yourself goth, intruder!!"

The old fashion I liked was all expensive as hell corporate shit and "glam" makeup looks that were a trendy thing at the time and required lots of expensive products to try and replicate. All the models/photos were touched up in post, and each one was sponsored by some cookie cutter nu goth fashion brand. All of them used the same filters, and looking back I couldn't tell you which one was which because it was all a slurry of the same content. A blur of black and white and the occasional religious symbol they didnt know the meaning of.

And I fell for both of these things because I was a dumb teen and dumb teens fall for anything that can give them a sense of belonging. (Im really sorry teens, but you'll agree once you're older, trust me)

So then I start to drift from that- I dont have any want to be precise and "glamorous" or made up, I dont want to spend tons of money on clothes and makeup, hell, I barely want anything to do with most "feminine" things anymore (but that's a story for another day). And honestly, maybe that's why.

The politics and new aesthetics of goth just aren't for me. Not one bit. They suck. They're soulless, tired, and bitchy as all hell. And as I've gotten into new things and started to come together as a person, that part of my past has become, well, ugly. Everytime I tried to replicate that style and those things, I felt subpar. It was awful.

I still love the music, but it's on the back burner as I discover new things I love and return to old musical flings.

And nowadays, I look to trad goth photos from the earliest beginnings of goth-

And boy, do those look a lot more appealing. The character, the love, the messiness. That I can behind. Just being yourself in a tiny, tiny little subculture finding its wings? Hell yeah.

Maybe this rant wasnt necessary, in fact I'm pretty sure it's all just dumb rambles. But I wanted that out of my system. This thing we built isnt all that nice anymore, so I'm just going to circle the mess in my own little bubble while it hopefully sorts itself out. Lemme know when that happens, yeah? And tell me what ya think. Well, uh...

Fuck.

-D

[springfieldblues]

my long ass review for S32E03 Now Museum, Now You Don’t

warning: LONG because i rambled about history more than i thought i would

id been looking forward to this one because i like art history, especially after seeing how they tried their best to stick to historical accuracy in the previous episode I, Carumbus. this time however….they didnt try that hard. i dont know why i thought theyd go through that sort of trouble again LMAO

but its okay, i dont really expect the simpsons to be the paragon of historical accuracy or anything. especially in anthology episodes told through a particular character's lens (in this case, lisa, whos already feverish so whatever)

first i just wanna say that this is, i guess, less of a review and more of an accidental list of history fun facts. so im just gonna get my general thoughts out of the way first.

the episode was fun! to me at least haha. i mean it got me to think and do a lot of research on my own so that must count for something. besides a couple of really weird ones, the jokes were good. anthology episodes tend to be….not that good but i thought this one was one of the better ones so far. idk.

anyway on to lisanardo da vinky its the renaissance! jesus christ the italian accents in the beginning of this segment were annoying as hell but i also feel like that was the joke lmao. ill be real i kind of tuned out for a second there when grampa started rambling so idk what he said.

i told myself i wouldnt get nitpicky with historical accuracy if the jokes were funny (final edit: so that was a lie) but this meh bit with the pizza guys and mascots was really not worth ignoring the fact that its impossible for italy to have any tomato-based food in the 15th century (tomatoes were brought to europe from the americas in the 16th century, and pizza as we know it today—flatbread, cheese, tomato—originated in the late 18th century)

oh this next part was kind of legit tho. lisanardo, like the real leonardo, became andrea del verrochio's apprentice at his workshop. i loved this next bit:

"Whoever paints the sweetest cherub will have the honor of having MY name signed on their work. That's what great artists do!"

SO YEAH as it turns out, lisanardo painted the sweetest cherubs. the painting here is called The Baptism of Christ, and the real leonardo assisted verrochio in finishing it. specifically, he painted the cherubs in the corner.

this causes verrochio to quit and go someplace with less talented people: a music school (yes, verrochio did quit painting after getting owned by young leo and his mad angel painting skills. he never did anything with music tho, he was more of a sculptor)

alongside lisanardo, in mr largo-verrochio's workshop we have barticelli (botticelli bart), dolphatello (donatello dolph), ralphael (raphael...ralph) and mediocrito (no one that i know of. sorry milhouse) (and kearney i guess but they dont refer to him by name). botticelli and donatello are said to have also been apprentices at verrochio's workshop, but raphael came a couple of decades later so he couldnt have been there. and donatello was too old so that claim is a bit questionable. but anyway

it IS true that leonardo's peers envied him, to the point where he was anonymously and purposefully accused of being gay (a major crime punishable by death in 15th century florence) while he was still working at verrochio's workshop

we are then treated by what im pretty sure is the fourth time the show has used 'at seventeen' by janis ian, this time sung by a dejected lisanardo (man they really do keep making yeardley sing these days huh) who only wishes to be appreciated and not envied.

"I'll show them all! I'll show them all in a secret diary that no one will decipher for 400 years!"

some of lisanardo's future inventions. who wouldve known

so after barticelli, for some reason (revenge??? or something?? what was his plan here idgi) steals lisanardo's diaries full of blueprints of her inventions and takes them to mr burns who i have to assume is pope alexander VI here, they decide to use her inventions for war.

"With these, we can kill the most evil people in the world!! ....Slightly different Christians."

leo actually did this of his own accord. im surprised this is what they decided to do with lisanardo instead of talking about leo's love of nature and vegetarianism (not a single mention of that in this episode? come on...) then again, trying to do good only to end up indirectly making things worse is a very standard lisa storyline. i guess they didnt want to miss the chance to have evil pope burns (very fitting, especially for that era since they were all about money and controlling the people)

so lisanardo decides to leave for france, unlike the real leonardo who was more or less persuaded by his ultimate fanboy king francis I to move to france.

"Lisanardo, I have many questions. Why are you hitting yourself? A nerd says 'what'? And how is it possible that I am rubber and you are glue? Et cetera, et cetera."

that line may seem a little random, like hes just nelson saying nelson things (and i mean, obviously he is) but the real francis also "had an unquenchable thirst for learning, and Leonardo was the world’s best source of experimental knowledge. He could teach the king about almost any subject there was to know, from how the eye works to why the moon shines." so yeah, he did have many questions and lisanardo, finally being appreciated for her intellect, was happy to answer them all. its very interesting how lisa assigned this role to nelson in her retelling of da vinci’s life :^)

and so she lived the rest of her days in france, nat king cole's 'mona lisa' plays because duh, and they make a da vinci code reference because duh. and the segment ends. and not a single time did they show the actual mona lisa painting. the fuck?

(ngl i was fully expecting bart to say 'leonardo da vinky' for a second here)

so this next segment is about french impressionist painters, most likely the batignolles group, a name adopted by the early representatives of impressionism. its much more vague than the lisanardo segment since no one here is referred to by name (except moe, more on him in a sec) but i dont feel like it really matters in this case. bart is prrrrooobably claude monet but its hard to say, this segment is kind of a mish-mash of a lot of things. also i gotta say i really liked how lisa introduced the story to bart with an 'if you hate the formal study of art' and not 'if you hate art' because thats exactly my headcanon. i LOVE the concept of artist bart and whenever its referenced it just makes perfect sense to me.

anyway the segment opens in 1863 at the école des beaux-arts (back then it was actually known as the académie des beaux-arts), preserver of traditional french art styles. skinner reviews his students’ paintings one by one. praises the plain, unimaginative paintings depicting your typical european countryside landscapes. very run-of-the-mill (haha get it...cuz theres….a windmill) (although the real académie didnt approve of such basic stuff, they wanted artists to draw epic historical and mythological scenes) then he gets to barts painting and he gives him an F- because the painting made him think.

(the paintings in this scene arent real famous paintings as far as i know but they are inspired by real paintings enough to get the point across)

in comes barney dressed as bacchus as a model for the students to sketch, which i just loved:

barney: “You prefer robe open or robe off?” skinner: “Just cover your privates with this walnut shell.” barney: “Whoa!!! So roomy!”

skinner gasps in horror at bart’s sketch, which “looks nothing like him” and bart explains that “it shouldn’t; we’re making the art that we feel because we can’t compete with a camera.” damn, you go bart. take that, realism. draw what you feel!!

(also no, you didnt need to hold still for 17 hours for a daguerreotype. 30 min tops.)

nelson haw-haw of the week: FOIE-gras!

so here they are at the moulin rouge (“enjoy it before baz luhrmann ruins it” hey shut up. i love that movie), which wouldnt be built for another 26 years, but it is the most widely known gathering place for bohemians in the public consciousness so i can understand why they went with the moulin. nelson delivers this anachronistic line:

“This époque keeps getting beller and beller!”

which alludes to la belle époque, the golden age of france usually dated from 1880 to 1914. made me snort so ill let that slide

and heres moe! as henri de toulouse-lautrec, who was actually born a year after the year this segment is set in. yo moe szyslak he was just 1

toulouse-moetrec introduces himself as the chronicler of the demimonde (not an actual job). an iconic figure associated with the moulin rouge (largely due to his affinity for alcohol and prostitutes), toulouse-lautrec was also a painter, having illustrated a series of posters for the moulin himself. he simply had to be in this segment, anachronisms be damned, just because they decided to include the moulin. cant have one without the other.

and yes he did have a walking cane where he kept his liquor.

i love how everyone drinks absinthe in this place. theyre bohemians what else would they drink

toulouse-moetrec points out that barts paintings are the greatest thing hes ever seen (and hes seen like five things!) and that hes a genius. milhouse realizes that they should stop doing what the teacher says and use their own minds to instead...start doing what bart says lmao. to the easels!

next we have skinner hyping up chalmers about the art his students made for the salon de paris, an art exhibition that the emperor of france will attend. he assures him that none of these paintings will encourage debate, provoke thought or be out of place at a dentist’s office. when they unveil the art, theyre both SHOCKED at how scandalous the paintings actually are.

this reaction was kind of accurate. impressionism was severely rejected at the salon de paris, due to paintings not looking finished enough to them, they thought they were ugly and vulgar for depicting nudity in a contemporary setting (historical and mythological nudity was fine). these impressionist paintings were sent to the salon de refusés, which is. yeah. the place where they sent the rejects. the salon de refusés does not make an appearance but this scene makes a reference to it when the artists get expelled from the royal salon. also:

“What about our student loans?” “Oh they’ll be refunded. We are not barbarians, I mean, come on.”

(god if only)

so the painters are down because they want the emperor to actually see their paintings. toulouse-moetrec pipes in once again with an idea.

“There is one thing the emperor loves more than anything.” “France?” “No, he hates France.”

apparently the emperor really loves cheese, which makes sense since its napoleon III (who loved cheese) and homer (who loves cheese.) so the painters roll into the salon inside a giant wheel of cheese (obviously.) as lenny said, “Eh, you know French cheese. Very runny.” napoleon III chases after the wheel into a room, where the wheel falls apart after getting chomped on by the emperor. now that they got his attention, the painters proudly show the emperor their impressionist art, which he couldnt be more indifferent about because he just wants to eat his cheese dammit, and he awards them with the royal medallion just to kind of get them out of his way. skinner immediately starts kissing ass (as he does) until marge’s like ‘hey wait a minute. you expelled these students from the royal salon’ and an executioner immediately starts ominously measuring skinners neck.

“Uh, sir...is your tongue sticking out because you’re dead or because you’re mad at me?”

and thats the end of that lmao (gore in this episode, gore in the last episode, and next week we’re getting gore too cuz its THOH, what the hell is goin on)

we get a short intermission with maggie, who wants a story for her too! lisa tells her that renaissance artists loved to put babies in their paintings, especially baby angels.

here she is showing her The Triumph Of Galatea by raphael:

King David Playing The Harp by peter paul reubens:

and a very simplified version of pretty much any depiction of hell by hyeronimus bosch lmao:

not much else to say about this one, really. but i really liked that sky!

the last segment is about frida kahlo and diego rivera. or as bart puts it ‘the one about a fat guy whos wife is too good for him.’ i was REALLY looking forward to this one because i love frida and i thought itd be a cool opportunity for animators to go bonkers and do really cool shit with her art as inspiration…..but the segment is not about frida, its about diego and his selling out to capitalism. and its also yet another story with homer and marge drama. no funky cool animation here. sigh i guess i’ll take it

the story begins in 1929 at la casa azul, frida’s home (now museum dedicated to her life and work.) frida and diego are getting married. this courtyard definitely did not look this way yet back in 1929. also theres something very cringy yet funny about lovejoy saying spanish words the way he does, i honestly cant decide how i feel about that one

the writers know theyre being cringy with their gringoness so they go along with it.

moe: “Spanish for ‘best wishes’!” mel: “Spanish for ‘congratulations’!” bumblebee man: “Spanish for ‘muy bueno’!”

OH YEAH BUMBLEBEE MAN this is his new voice actor, eric lopez! hes not mexican but its still great to finally have a latino actor voicing a latino character and hes very excited to be part of the show so i hope to hear more of him!! im rooting for him

el barto/zorro makes an appearance which i am very confused about. he has jack shit to do with frida and diego and mexico in the 20s-30s. el zorro was set in the spanish california of the early 19th century. their use of the original theme song makes me think they just wanted to flex their disney privileges tbh

lets not talk about that that whole scene was bad

anyway diego announces he and frida are going to new york, without even asking her first. frida is obviously pissed.

“Don’t worry, as a woman, you’ll be treated with much more respect in America.”

so in new york, diego is having a bit of a business meeting with mr burns as one of the members of the rockefellers, who is commissioning him to draw a mural for the rockefeller center. its kinda funny how he refers to him and frida as socialists even though they were very much communists lmao its okay you can say it. ok so far, but then frida says ‘yes, we hate the capitalists! right now, a young socialist is being born who will take them down! mr. bernie sanders. i hope hes quick about it’ and that was a simple enough joke and couldve been left at that but then its immediately followed by this weird as fuck family guy-esque cutaway gag to bernie as a baby:

“Getting a cootie shot should not cost your lunch money. And if you don’t listen to me, listen to the Bernie Babies! What? Everybody’s got goons.” *larger babies start beating up this other baby* “I disavow that, and welcome it.”

this confused me so much that i had to ask one of my american friends to help me understand, but even she was like ‘uhhh yeah thats a weird joke,’ especially now that hes been out of the race for months (then again these episodes take almost a year to produce. i guess they couldnt be bothered to replace it with something more relevant.) whatever that was weird and confusing and unfunny moving on

frida is pretty irked that diego is going through with this deal. after all, it goes against everything they believe in. im not sure how the real frida felt about diego doing the mural, but she did feel a bit of rage during her visit to the united states, especially the obvious disparity between rich and poor. she hated having to interact with capitalists and found americans very boring. in this segment, frida seems to be acting more like the american communist party, which diego got kicked out of for accepting commissions from wealthy patrons. in any case, frida is pretty upset about this whole thing.

and finally we get the first and only kind of surreal frida moment. kinda. maybe. its more cartoonish than anything but im desperate ok

interesting how they felt like they had to add a “don’t smoke” in big letters after showing patty and selma flying away on their giant cigarettes. i wonder if this is something theyre making them do now? i remember hearing something about them toning down patty and selma’s smoking

diego comes home to frida, drunk as hell, followed by the marx brothers. i cant believe they didnt make a marxism joke come on it was RIGHT THERE. THE MARX BROTHERS. KARL MARX. COME ON

frida paints her feelings.

this makes diego realize that frida is a genius and he is not half the artist she is. he proclaims he will now show his awe of her by sleeping with other women, starting “an hour ago.” to which frida replies, “and i will start sleeping with other women, starting two hours ago.” yes this was pretty much their relationship. though im just wondering how the hell did diego not know frida was this kind of artist until now? i know homers an idiot but jeez. art was how frida and diego met, diego knew from the get-go that frida was an incredible artist. i guess the fame got to his head or something. again, homer just being stupid.

“well enough already, while the art is still deco, okay?”

its time for the mural diego painted, Man At The Crossroads, to be unveiled:

rockefeller examines it. good and great so far, and then...uh oh

“Who’s that fellow…? With the beard, and the bolshevik smile…” “That’s the founder of Soviet Russia, Lenin!”

“B-b-but he’s a communist!” “Oh he just attended a couple of meetings.”

rockefeller will not have this communist in the temple to capitalism that is the rockefeller center, so he orders diego to paint over it. diego stands his ground and refuses. despite rockefeller’s threats, diego says that theres only one person he wants to be proud of him no matter what and in true homer & marge fashion, frida is touched by this. they happily leave the rockefeller center.

now, the real story of Man At The Crossroads and the rockefeller center was actually not that different. as soon as the rockefellers found out diego had snuck in a portrait of lenin into the mural, they ordered him to paint over it, to which he refused. diego even offered to include abraham lincoln and even american abolitionists in the mural as a compromise, but the rockefellers simply did not want any references to communism whatsoever. they did not complain about the hammer and sickle, though. yes, they did know diego was a communist and hired him anyway. what did they expect? lmao. diego said:

"Rather than mutilate the conception [of the mural], I shall prefer the physical destruction of the conception in its entirety, but preserving, at least, its integrity."

so they decided to destroy the mural before it was even finished and they never talked to each other again.

diego then repainted the mural at the palacio de bellas artes back in mexico, this time known as Man, Controller of the Universe. this new version included even more communist leaders and a depiction of john d. rockefeller jr. drinking at a nightclub, right underneath a depiction of syphilis bacteria. cue nelson haw-haw:

this was the version they used in the episode also, since the original was, well, never finished and also destroyed. only a black and white photograph of it exists, taken by diego before it was destroyed so he could remake it.

right so, homer!diego then pulls a Barthood and finishes the episode with a large mural summarizing the entire episode. he says some rick and morty thing i didnt get because i dont watch the show idk idc

the end

ALRIGHT NOW ITS TIME FOR THE STORY OF VINCENT VAN MOE

[goatpaste]

what about... fallout 3 companions or just characters you have thoughts on

ouhgh i DO have the opinions and ill stick to just the companions 

love Fo3 its my favirote Fallout game its very messy and ough i love it

Butch Deloria: 10/10!

still like one of my top teir video game crushes probably silly but before my blog was known as a warrior cat/mlp/ect blog i was primarily a fallout blog and drew SO MUCH of my lone wanderer with butch

i love Butch, just ough the perfect man to me. lil bit idiot in there, greaser, clearly gay and/or trans thats nOT a cishet person. he’s so goofy and terrible i do love him

absolutely hate fellow butch deloria fans their all straight women who draw him white and have not a single thought in their head. sorry yall in love with a gay man and have a weird thing about only drawing him super pale or drawing him his normal brown skin color when you wanna draw him roughing up and being mean to your white lady lone wanderer :/ just saying

butch is also like the most fleshed out companion i think its kinda fair to have a soft spot for him hes the only one sjkdgh with any form of companion quest. which i love him companion quest

like it REALLY was ‘oh were fighting for our right to leave!’ but actually were not, turns out its only butch who wants to leave because the moment he leaves everyone else locks themselves right back in

butch is good and makes emotion i think about 

since im already rambling about a man just some of my favorite butch qoutes

ok ok this is turning into just a post about butch but i really love him hes sdjkhg so funny and goober and one of the few things in the game even close to a developed story in fo3 especially with Companions

Charon: 8/10

he’s good! thats my grumpy grumpy friend! 

and like in his character voice line script notes like you can SeE an angle they were going for with his character post ‘hiring’ him but the fact you cant do much after that or free him from his contract sucks! he’s so cool and i really think if fo3 was more developed he coulda had a badass storyline

i just love the underworld ghoul society its so good, the general like way ghouls lived and was reflected in the way they were treated and where they lived and how all their interactions worked with the super mutants and stuff was cool. plus the underworld motifs in the names and everything was very fun 

Clover: 4/10 (this is very very hard)

Clover for me is sucha hard character to pin my feelings onto

clover exist in the corner of the game that, if you just followed the main story you can totally avoid bUT its completely and really fucked up! the fucking slavery shit and how you caN jusT become a slaver?? and its REALLY not negatively reinforced as it should be. 

Then with clover! its vERY clearly states, she is a sex slave who is brain washed by the slaver technology and the only reason she is super into the slavers is because she is brain washed.

but there is NO way to fix her, we literally dont know her character because its ONLY weird sex slave horny! its so fucking terrible (nOT to mention recently learning she is apparently meant to be asian in the gecks and i didnt know because the game really leans hard into keeping the characters with white facial features. so thats a doUBle yikes) 

i would love a story about helping her recover and be a real companion but she isnt so i dont knoW her but i wish we could!

Dogmeat: 10/10

A GOOD GOOD BOY!!! fo3 dogmeat so good i love that dogmeat i think that model/breed is the cutest one tbh

Fawkes: 9/10

love fawkes! thats my friend

sdjkgh really sdjk just simple character, i feel there isnt a lot to fawkes beyond thats my best friend who i love! but theres not a lot of story to him. and like what story is just yknow, typical super mutant story. but he’s a friend.

its also a HUGE shame they cut that vault 87 holotapes like! fo3 really feels like there sOMETHing there that could built an extra level that would really helped the game pop but just didnt get it in there

i dO remember i think they made him trans on accident or was misunderstood to be trans

anyways i’ll take that fact to my grave, fawkes trans 

Jericho: 0/10

LIL BITCH LIL BITCH WHO SHOULDNT BE IN THE GAME WE SHOULD HAVE HAD AMATA INSTEED OF YOU LIL SHIT HEAD

Sergent RL-3: 4/10

just a funny robot. just absolutely a lil bastard 

like dont get me wrong, he says dumb shit. he is wrong. but it is funny to hear his anti communism propaganda because its stupid as shit   

but i can kjsdgh only take it so long and id much rather travel with dogmeat

Star Paladin Cross: 10/10

I LOVE HER, liTERAlly she is the moST underated fo3 companion i see more people talk about fucking jericho more that her

shes your godmother!!! a GOOD LADY AND YOU WONT EVEN REMEMBER SHE EXIST????

the ONLY time i see anyone talk about her is when its mods to make her pale skinned and young

i hate fallout people just behave for 5 seconds PLEASE. THE GAME GAVE YOU A CYBORG GODMOTHER AND YOU DO HER LIKE THAT??

[vanityloves]

anyways im gonna listen to/read the fuckin...rise of the ogre shit bc ive been putting it off 🪓🥴 im gonna put stuff under the cut bc im gonna be TALKING n dont wanna make a new post everytime

piss

ok he performed for 2 pounds 50. which is basically $3 today i- well it was absolutely a power play on his father behalf that also had the promise of money so.

also lol he said Rejection fueled my ambitions which, yknow,, i already knew but it still hurts and i will continue to talk ab it xoxo

AH HELP. "...if ebay had been invented at the time he would've sold me online there and then,"

"man hands on misery to man, yknow"

THEN PROCEEDS TO CONNECT IT TO MUSIC/HIS CAREER. this man said :) the one thing i truly have a passion for. the one thing i fucking like.

oh yeah. bullied by students AND teachers.

oh god hes 42ish during this interview? ok.

the fuckin school bully saying he wouldve acted differently if he knew what hed become

getting called "faceache", then proceeds to call 2d that. jfc he really does just repeat what everyone says. really "treating others how i was treated/how they treat me"

maybe thats why? hes kinder to fans? bc :] you support me and like me so, ok ill return that energy

MURDOC GETTING HIS ASS BEAT N PARADING HOME LIKE WELL I WON BC 'I PISSED YOU OFF' SJDJD

a real rowdy boy. absolute nasty boy. fraud and arson... shooting ppls windows with his air pistols

black sabbath being a huge inspiration? fucking absolutely.

became a satanist n shit at age 16? "it fitted me like a glove" "heavy metal and devil worshipping became my favorite past times" ajsj funny that ppl in trying times often seek religion or following of some sort

heavy metal being his favorite, n loving the clash, while hannibals was more punk based

hannibal breaking murdocs nose for the 2nd and 3rd time for playing his music on hannibals turntable

he doesnt sound that bitter? ab hannibal? he doesnt sound incredibly fond but he talks ab how he got him into a lot of music. so, i imagine they we're a bit closer than i thought?

international baccalaureate in antisocial? anthropology?

MURDOC IS ACTUALLY SMART HE WAS JUST. NOT INTERESTED IN THE SUBJECTS? I GUESS? (also,,, he literally Built cyborg noodle and i think he had a PhD too lol. but its always nice to hear hes actually...yknow, interested or good at other things)

alright but murdoc having a fascination w/ other cultures - or at least some interests, that lead him to actually study the damn subject and "pass with flying colors"

'fuck college though. im gonna be a rockstar'

he sold his soul at 18ish? whenever the fuck he got kicked out but college was mentioned so my brain goes to 18ish idk

he lived with his father still and paid rent via low paying jobs one including 'part time dressing as santa'

help he was ab to take a Personal Job for quick cash and uhh well, "still made me call him sir though" he really said 20 dollars is 20 dollars, huh "that story was totally true"

alright, 1997,,,

2d stuff

loves zombie stuff? thats really cute, and is freaked out by the way they move. god he rambles

both he and murdoc are horses in the chinese zodiac

[[jfc ok if the official shit compares them a lot i understand why ppl ship them but Dont. its a narrative foil and that doesnt always mean Romance jfc.]]

SUMTHINK.

truly... a lil stinker. super cute bouncing baby and a "bit thick" which is stull so endearing to me. hes just a happy man!

excitable 10 year old and would dance around his room

jfc the fact he has normal/caring parents. i kinda forget how opposite hes supposed to be from murdoc but i think thats another thing jsjsysg (murdoc said why isnt my tragic story making me famous why does he get to be the Star. no wonder he acts like a loon)

i still dont get how gettin bonked by a tree branch made him go bald and also turn his hair blue

big tiddy nurse mommy,,,

went to the same school as The Cure and got decent grades despite hittin the noggin quite hard. WANTED TO BE A STORM CHASER... OMG??

oh thats really cute, hed bond with his dad by building keyboards toegther 🥺💕

messed around with paints and graffiti? artistic king

MURDOC AGAIN: QHDJ 'VILLANOUS' GANG HELP

oh yeah d day...new instruments, new band, new singer - and 'had to be the best or no dice' and absolutely CONFIDENT that his songs were bangers ajsjd

but on that same note, had absolute faith (or desperate) in 2d which i love

ransacked the fucking music shop jdjdj and 2d said he was Just Standing There behind the counter the whole shift hdhdh

"thats when your eye came out, yeah" "yeah!-" HELP WHY DOES HE SOUND SO HAPPY AB IT ?? yes he said ut hurt but he sounds...ok

jfc murdoc ragdolling this poor mf around. dunking him and slapping him around. actually? so incredibly terrible and abusive and i hate him for that 🔫 im sorry 2d stans. we dont condone that behavior here ong.

how and why the FUCK did 2d's parents allow that fucker near their child after that i??? help. wtf. his moms a nurse why didnt she just have murdoc sit in plain view of other people. god damn.

2d flying out the window n hitting the curb "whoops"

"just two black holes...[ah] it looked great...a blue hair, blacked eyed GOD- the girls would go wild-" "pretty boy looks" ???? HELP. HE DOESNT GO LIGHT ON THE COMPLIMENTS, HUH

RUSS TIME

oh yeah, he straight up kiddnapped this man help. idk how he managed that, russ is a Big Man??

AND MURDOCS MUSIC WAS SO FUCKING SEXY GOOD that russel said hm alright ill stay, :] out ifbhis owm free will im screaming.

"oh this is one of them febreeze commercials" "uh . yeah sure. *murdoc turning on his Sick Tunes*" but that either means? it was just his guitar playing the convinced russ? unless he and 2d recorded sumn?

"2d was the looks, murdoc the brains, then russel truly was the heart"

'while 2d and murdoc liked music, this man was a MUSICIAN' god fucking bless this book holy shit ny man russ getting some respect. he said back hurts from carrying this band.

murdoc basically heard this guy had big trauma that gave him So Many Skills n said "thats what i want" ok idk thats actually really? inch rest ting to me. seems that murdocs fine handing out compliments but i guess that where his charisma really helps out yeah?

"he was going to be in my band whether he liked it or not" ...murdoc-

HELP. 2D IS LIKE BRO GO ON IM LISTENING 🥺 despite hearing the story 50-60 times and murdoc said fuck off you lil shit.

ok irrelevant but i love his voice! its super comforting n nice to listen to 🥺

HELP MURDOCS SO BITTER. "NOTHING THAT HAPPENS TO US IS NORMAL" WELL YEAH. THIS IS TRAUMA CENTRAL.

idk how/why he sucked up all his friends souls though ... how are they all possessing the same person. they said "its my turn on The Russ"

DELL IS HIS ACTUAL, LITERAL SOULMATE...KING...😭

went to a private school,,, and was already possessed? and the thing where he gets bigger and smaller is a reoccurring thing?

was in a coma for 4 years?

hiphop machine...time and history...the ultimate set i guess.

his knowledge was infinite and hes a "Renaissance man" hes so fucking smart our king. jack of all trades but a master of drums. he said i know im good and what of it

PAULA.

HELP. HE RMBRS THE STALL: CUBICAL NUMBER 3 🥴 IF I DO RECALL 🤤

yes russel our king. fuck up his nose 5 more times. probably stunted his growth too. he shrunk after russ gave him a wallop im sure

why dies paula sound like tracer overwatch

also only dated 2d for 2 months before joining the band?

HELP SHE REALLY WAS THE FIRST MURDOC FUCKER: "but when i saw murdoc with his thick greasy hair, green teeth and yellow skin i thought 'oh this is the ine for me!'" "OH HES SUCH A DANDY-" HELP ME IM HQJDHD

sick in the head...like i want to hurt people help girl. shes fucking Crazy. but she rly said damn i didnt hear back from him again 😭 and my purse is gone JSHHD

MURDOC: SHE WAS DEPRESSINGLY UGLY *still fucked her*

NOODLE TIME

"small japanese person!"

2d: we werent gorillaz until noodle arrived!

im dying the reason he chose gorillaz. 'swinging through the jungle baring my ass'

noodle really said "im just happy to be here" and she balanced everyone out 😭 "she gave off pure love and the fact that she could laugh at murdoc REALLY helped too" RUSS... IS BABY

JFC MURDOCS SO FUCKING CONFIDENT IN THIS BAND IM LIVING FOR THAT. HE SAID YOU WANT US SO BAD IT MAKES YOU LOOK STUPID. THE CHARISMA

2d rambling ab some girl he met and "ssSs" "whats the s stand for hawhaw" "i dont know!".

THE RECORD LABEL GUY.

one song is all it took i ❤ good for them

just murdoc talking ab the party that they threw for thier deal and saying "you dont know how much of a dick i felt like [when carrying one of those huge checks]" like oh thats whatll make you a dick? alright.

A FOOD FIGHT THAT WENT SO HARD THAT IT KNOCKED 2DS TONSILS OUT? WHAT THE FUCK

ahshdj damon and murdoc not getting along bc of Rival Band One Uppery + damon calling murdocs cuban heels crap since ge wore steel ones with gold spurs.

MURDOC FEELIN EMBARRASSED BC HES 'QUITE PROUD OF HIS SHOES'

but the band and damon getting over music and their ambitions and became a "paternal figure"

HELP MURDOC SAID AWIOGA @ RACHEL WHICH MADE HER THROW HER DRINK IN HIS FACE AND SPLIT FROM 2D. kinda sad actually, she said i still like 2d but murdoc kinda ruined it by trying to get it in with me, it put a strain in our relationship :/ oh god murdocs That Dude

nov 31 1998: started recording :]

40 tracks that got cut down to 15 holy shit

KONG STUDIOS 🤲

hooking up cameras in every room ejdjsu

webby artist of the year in 2006? holy shit

noodle learning ab kong studios omfg

JFC. YES I KNEW KONG WAS BUILT ON/IN A CEMETERY BUT I DIDNT KNOW PPL FOR THE FUCKING PLAGUE WHERE THROWN THERE HDJD

built in 1739?

the ghost of the first owners ghost still roams around in the kitchen in the early hours and moans 'aaa glass of water'

theres some rotting bullshit near the studios and in the summer its fucking TERRIBLE

the former owners were a biker gang, and they all died in a fire

murdoc said this place has bad vibes. i want it.

grim weather

the building feels impossible to escape from huHgg

[enchanted--realm]

When Calls The Heart Live Rambles

S8 ep8 Parades and Charades (or something like that)

My gosh this episode is perhaps the best one we've had all season, and by that I just mean that Elizabeth actually had screen time, and she had actual lines, and she was part of plot that is relevant to h e r. Finally, the main character actually felt like the main character. HOWEVER, she is not very likeable in this episode, I must say (she hasn't been likeable for a while but you know)

The start of the episode when Elizabeth comes off her horse and she tries to talk to Nathan. I'm so glad that Nathan is firm even when Elizabeth doesnt like it. And he's not mean about it, he just tries to be honest while protecting himself and Allie from getting hurt even more. I honestly just love it when Elizabeth and Nathan have disagreements in general because when they do have arguments, it's usually because someone's feelings are showing and then it resolves in having made good progress in deepening their relationship. Elizabeth was totally out of line during that conversation btw. 'Now you're just being hurtful', um says the woman who rejected this man's love proposal and is now hurt that his niece didn't want to invite her to her very important and personal adoption ceremony...wow Elizabeth you really be asking for a lot. And then she's upset that he has to ride off to take care of mountie business. Yes, Elizabeth, this man has a job to do and your conversation will have to wait, sorry girlfriend.

When Nathan told Lucas to 'Save it' haha! Though I enjoyed it, I hope they don't write Lucas and Nathan to turn into enemies bc they are both pining for Elizabeth. It seems like it's headed in that direction based off of their dialogue throughout this episode. I guess it's understandable since Nathan has already been rejected and isn't backing down while Lucas and Elizabeth are a more official item. Okay, yeah, I understand it, but I don't want it to go too far *thinks back to the Lucas and Elizabeth in the rain scene* I guess I can't hope for that with this show. And later on when Lucas was talking to Nathan about how he should be thinking more of Allie and not getting her hurt. Ooooh I wanted to slap that fool. Who is he to be talking about Allie, he doesnt know anything about their relationship and he had no right to bring her up. Ugh that made me so angry.

Lucas's office. May I just say. Daaang. That's some nice, fancy office he's got there. Beautiful, absolutely beautiful. They were planning this reveal for a long time I bet to make Lucas look more attractive in this love triangle. And let me say, that first scene with Elizabeth in Lucas's office finally made me understand what Elizabeth see's in this guy. We were finally shown a glimpse into Lucas's daily life and how he handles business. Elizabeth comes in wanting to talk, but he has to be on the phone bc, ya know, the guy has to work, and we see him taking care of his responsibilities instead of pining over Elizabeth. Usually, in every scene that involves Elizabeth and Lucas, he's typically able to give her his full attention and the entire scene is about him wanting to win her favor. But finally we have a scene where he isn't just there to win her heart and he has to tell her, 'sorry, but can we do this later?' And bc of that the dinner invite didnt come across too forward and it made sense bc they had things to talk about. The scene just really built up a new side to Lucas's character that I felt we hadn't seen yet and that was lacking. He actually feels like a character with an independent purpose now. And of course I didn't forget. The French. Yeah it was both attractive and again added to Lucas's character. I'm sure the Lucas shippers are drooling right now. And on a more serious note, his French sounded very good and I actually just looked it up Chris McNally speaks French so...yeah very cool. But Elizabeth's French when she was saying goodbye at the door...oh how cringey. I mean she spoke well too, but it was just unnecessary and oh I cringed so hard when she did that.

When she went back to his office later...oh no. He said he didnt feel up to having dinner together, and then she still didnt leave him alone and was like, well I can stay and we can just talk. Um, no Elizabeth, the man just said he didnt want to talk right now, but I guess since it's not talking over dinner then it's okay??? And she patted the cushion for him to join her on that teeny tiny little bench. Yo, there was no room for two there. They were pressed up against each other so much it was so awkward to watch. I mean that was like being forced to sit in the two-seater bus seat when clearly there's only room for one. And then the hand hold...yuck, and the deep breath like they were both being tempted...eeh, and then he kissed her hand...ooh. He had to tell her to go bc he wanted to remain a patient man. I'm glad he told her, I'm not surprised that happened. Come on Elizabeth, give the man a break. I mean what did you think would happen when you asked him to sit right next to you on that tiny bench for one. Omg and she fanned herself after exiting. She likes him that much?? Or she's trying to make love form from a purely physical attraction.

I really don't like the whole Rachel and Christopher romance. Maybe I would like it and believe it more if the actors actually looked like teenagers. I mean, Rachel does not look 17, especially since we regularly see child actors on the show in school and they are entering their teens, if they aren't teens already. When comparing a kid like Anna to Rachel, Rachel just seems way to old for 17.

I love how we see Allie's side to this love triangle plot. I loved the scene between her and Elizabeth in the school house. I liked that we were finally having a discussion between just them, and then Elizabeth opens the invitation! I laughed so hard! The pop up of Nathan in his mountie uniform and Elizabeth at the dinner table. Oh that was so funny! and also adorable. Allie wasn't taking any of it, yo she said *Fine and she snatched that invitation back and she tore it up. I was yelling at my tv, yes Allie you tell her!

When Elizabeth approached Nathan at the parade...come on E. That was not the time or place. Again, I like that they have these conversations and disagreements, but the writing of that dialogue was just so bad I thought. It was so awkward sounding and the pacing just felt off. It really didnt flow and I wonder if the writers were running out of time or something. When Nathan said that Allie is afraid to talk to Elizabeth without him present...oh that hurt inside. I feel so sorry for Allie, she's so hurt by all this I just want to make everything better for her. I like that Elizabeth's concern for Allie is at the forefront bc it's like her and Nathan are the concerned parents, but since Elizabeth rejected Nathan (and therefore Allie too) she really has no right to demand a say in how to help Allie feel better. Elizabeth isnt part of the family unit and Allie is solely Nathan's responsibility. I really liked Erin's acting in the way we could see the moment where Elizabeth thought back to her conversation with Rosemary and decided right then and there that she had to ask Nathan what it was he wasnt telling her. I'm kind of disappointed in the secret though. I had made that prediction, but thought it was just too much and unnecessary drama...and then of course that's what it was. I have no clue how this will play out. I can't even remember the preview for next week. Anyway, overall, Elizabeth central, but also Elizabeth's annoying. Lucas shippers finally have something of substance...sort of. And as usual Nathan and Allie steal the show and I couldn't love them more.

[buzzykrueger]

hello! I been thinking lately, reading lot's of theories and fanfics of possible outcomes if Gon and Killua got to fight Pitou together. If Gon hadn't treated Killua like he did, would he have managed to convince him to fight Pitou alone? I'm not trying to justify anything, although Gon's reaction was very human and realistic (I had thought of the words he said to Killua, before he said them because it's a natural reaction) but I can't help but wonder if Gon was able to predict what would happen. if he and Killua fought together. We know that Gon has a very, very strong animal instinct and it is likely that he unconsciously realized that:

-Pitou was lying when he said he could heal Kite

-Killua could try to calm him down when Gon finally accepted the fact that Kite is dead, resulting in Gon not making the pact with his nen

-They would not be able to beat Pitou with their normal abilities.

Yes, Gon was willing to fight and give his life to save Kite the first time they found Pitou, but I'm sure Gon was not willing to fight with Killua this time (at least i think he knew, subconsciously) because Killua is the most important person to him. He can be a big distraction. this made me so worried! what would have happen if Killua voiced his concerns about their friendship while Gon was talking with Pitou? Pitou could've easily taken that chance to harm any of them, Gon WOULD be distracted because he cares about Killua.

I can't think of a better outcome, I think their personalities and their decisions allowed them to stay alive, and that means they can be together for longer! they only need a break to realize that. I'm so sorry for the long ask! i write a lot

I agree that Gon was willing to fight alone this time, for real. That's why he directly said that way they've met puppet Kite for the first time: "Killua... I'll take that bastard myself". He's perceptive and caring, he knows that, under normal circumstances, it has to be Killua to fight by his side - but not this time. But I don't know for sure how much of the whole encounter with Pitou sequence had a worrying about Killua's safety

Not that I disagree, not at all! But Pitou was 100% sure a trigger for Gon to snap, that's why he almost killed Morel just by imagining Pitou is there. He really got off his track, like he was bottling and antecipating this SO MUCH that seeing/imagining Pitou was enough to mess with his mind badly. He really wanted to redeem himself and prove he's capable of dealing with "his mess". If he weavers or get logical like Killua, he would lose all of that menacing aura and as well might look weak (in his mind). Things that are the core of Gon's trauma and most negative traits.

That said, I can't say Killua could have stopped Gon's vow! It was his ultimate snap, its hard to measure how capable Gon was of his surroundings at that moment.

But I'm pretty sure Killua wanted to go and feels guilty that he's "failed his job" (when he shouldn't be the one responsible for Gon's views on his own safety and control). Killua is the one who thinks he's a nuisance, and bottled his feelings because he thinks they are less important than Gon's and doesn't want them to distract him with such "unworthy matters".

And yes, Gon probably thought about everything like not letting anyone get hurt until the moment he started to lose his mind, I like how Togashi showed this with Gon both worried about Palm and worried about Killua before he meets Meleoron for the first time, so we get to compare his different states of mind and be sure that he would've ease Killua's insecurities if he knew. And losing Killua would be the only thing that could really shatter his body, soul and resolve, but he never stopped Killua from risking himself 'cause he believes in him as much Killua believes in Gon - thats why they were the only one for each other. After he wakes, he acknowledges how out of mind he had to be to shut Killua out that way, so I guess he would still fight alone but maybe would've expressed a lot better if he wasn't dealing with so much pain and grief (which was compared to a brain injury, so we know he didnt mean that way!!!)

OKAY ILL GET TO THE POINT sorry, so yes, I think he would've convinced Killua because Killua was already decided to respect and believe in Gon, like always, even if he was kinda pushing Gon forward out of fear of being rejected but then got scared of losing Gon when seeing him from the back. Confused, but pushing and pulling back, like a Yo-Yo.

I know i've rambled a lot and was late on your point but I hope I understood it right and answered properly!! I'm glad Killua found how useful and meaningful he was to everyone 'cause he was the goat at the Palace Invasion, the only person he couldn't save was the one he cared the most - because both he and Gon built walls around themselvs in order to keep focused and to protect each other from their feelings, 'cause they were confused and hurt about'em as well and didnt know how to cope.

ps: interesting the thing you said about Pitou lying, bc I didnt see that way! I've interpreted like Pitou so desperate to heal Komugi that they promised that but didn't know who Kite was or how bad they got him (they couldnt remember just by his names 'cause names werent a big deal for the ants). I think Pitou realized they couldnt heal Kite the moment they got there.

[timextoxhajima]

Okay so Imma be a little stubborn and send you a long ass ask because I have things to say, now that the series has, sadly, unfortunately, ended!

Next ask is that, so fair warning, okay bye, thank you for listening to this warning!

READ ONLY IF YOU'VE FINISHED LMLL

[below the cut contains indepth analysis of lmll if you're interested! it's highlighted in pink!]

Okay, the best characters (sorry Juyeon, I like Jang-Won and Mr. Ro, a little bit more) are leaving, very literally, and I am crying my eyes out, no joke! You broke this tough cookie😭😭😭😭 I never thought I could built such a connection with characters and omg, I haven't cried since like Divergent and I have read so many books and why are you doing this, I mean I know but like please dont let her die! I need her to be immortal and sorry I am rambling, I am just emotional! Bye! I'll go listen to sad songs and cry a little bit more😭😭

sis.. when you first sent this in i was already so uwu and then my next thought was: fuck, what about c20???? i hope you didn't cry TOO much...

Dear Dana and Love Me A Little Less, Don't say goodbye, say see you soon! This is not my goodbye, but a see you soon, so I can take some distance (and cry over Jang-won and the series ending) and come back later to read it again and again. ( I thought it was only fit to write this as a letter - so, sorry if this is too long, but just bear with me, okay?) Firstly, Dana, I have already said this so many times before and I will say it again and again, the love and dedication you have for your works is so beautiful. LMLL is your genius-brain baby and the series has touched my heart in ways I thought not possible. Secondly, when you say LMLL doesnt get enough interactions, I understand how much demotivating that can be, and I genuinely wish for it to gain so much more interaction, especially now that it is finished! I have never been the one to follow and updating series with such vigour before ( I am too impatient for updates) but with LMLL, I was so excited and looking forward to each chapter update! You will not believe me but I would read and then rant to my irl friend about it, coz it was very very interesting ( I have already told you I even had a dream starring the characters) So, thank you for writing such a piece! I promise I'll read this atleast a few times more! Lastly, LMLL, for me, started out as an attempt to like reading again, and also with the story itself, I had very different expectations. But, even though I bawled my eyes out for the last two chapters, I like the way this progressed instead to the expectations I had in mind! I have lost people too, people I have confided in, admired, and people who were strong stubborn assholes who made the world a better place. This hits hard after that. The idea of not only showing geniune love, along with the idea of growing as a person, and learning and being kind and geniune, is an idea too brilliant, and honestly, LMLL is so beautiful for having all this! For me, it's no more a story but more like a friend recounting their day! Something I look forward to 100%. Umm, I could go on with the praises, honestly but like this is too long already and I am getting emotional ( don't go LMLL! I cannot part with you yet?! -- can you see the way I wrote this in my notes app, to make sure I didnt make mistakes?) Okay, bye, I hope this wasn't too much, Dana! Your lovely dedicated LMLL reader, Suzy

NAURRRR SUZY PLEASE this super long ask hit me RIGHT IN THE GUT like idk how to put it into words how happy and lucky i am to have you as a reader for lmll! wrt the lack of interactions, i think rn I'm very satisfied actually. I'm getting the reactions i was hoping the series would induce because earlier on i wasn't getting a lot of reblogs and comments/reactions so having this feels like such a huge achievement as a writer. [i kinda feel bad too okay i swear]

and thank you so much for seeing the bigger picture of lmll!!! like YES? i titled it 'love me a little less' because of many many different reasons. the title of the fic had initially been 'love me with your heart and I'll give you all my time', set in the same chaebol world BUT it just didn't stick as well. 'love me a little less' is actually a thought that jang won harboured right from the very beginning because if you noticed, jang won's diagnosis was on Christmas in 2020, which meant she already knew at the point of time her father came back. 'love me a little less' was a warning to her father, her brother and juyeon. another way of interpretation was actually because jang won knows that she's not the kindest samaritan, and therefore she actually doesn't have confidence that she could find love in the first place. she has no gauge of how well she is at conceptualizing love and understanding it. 'love me a little less' is an apology - because she was convinced she was incapable of love. the whole story actually revolves around the grander scheme of things: jang won learning to love and be kind, juyeon learning to grow independent and understanding of his own feelings. i have so much i could say but right now I'm just kind of dizzy from the reactions I've been getting so I'll keep it like that for now. thank you for keeping up with lmll, suzy!!!!! <33333333

[we-stan-bruce-ban]

18 or 14 for the prompt thing 👀👀👀👀

14: “Is everything alright?” “It is now that you’re here with me.” *Which I tweaked a bit but same general idea

-O-

Thor hadn’t had a phone for terribly long. He still had a lot to figure out, but over time he’d learned one thing for sure: late night texts from Tony were almost never a good thing.

[Tony]: Hey

[Tony]: Bad news

What a surprise.

[Thor]: What is it this time?

[Tony]: Bruce

Immediately, he felt his heart stop. Thor’s typically slow thumbs were a blur as he tapped out a message.

[Thor]: What happened? Is he ok?

[Tony]: Not…really

[Thor]: What does that mean?

[Tony]: He’s stuck

[Thor]: Stuck?

[Tony]: Yep

[Thor]: In what?

[Tony]: He’s stuck mid transformation between the hulk and himself

[Tony]: Like, kinda big kinda green, very distressed, and I think he and the hulk are sharing a mind? Idk he keeps yelling at himself every now and then

Thor honestly didn’t know what to say. He didn’t know Bruce could get stuck like that, but it sounded awful. He took a moment to figure out what he wanted to ask next.

[Thor]: Does he seem hurt? Physically?

[Tony]: No clue, its kinda hard to tell

[Thor]: I’m coming over.

[Tony]: Figured you would. On floor 14

[Thor]: Please keep watch over him while I’m on my way.

[Tony]: No I think Im just gonna go make myself a margarita while my best friend is tearing his own existence apart in ways we didnt even know where possible beforehand

[Tony]: Of course Ill watch him

Thor didn’t waste time replying to Tony’s trademark sarcasm. Within mere minutes, he was over at Stark Tower, standing in the freezing rain and harsh gusts of wind that were probably brought on by his own stress. The door opened for him and he slipped inside, making a beeline for the elevator. Thor rode all the way up to the fourteenth floor, trying to catch his breath. Before he even got out of the elevator, he could tell that there was a strange sort of tension in the air.

When he stepped out, Bruce was nowhere to be found. Tony was rubbing his temple, as if he had a headache. Thor neared him, his eyes darting around the lab.

“Where is he?”

“Asleep. Finally.”

“Asleep?”

“He eventually passed out. Over-exhaustion, probably.”

“Okay,” he nodded, pausing. “Is he okay, though?”

“I…don’t know.”

Thor sighed and looked up towards the ceiling, then back at Tony. “So, he’s both? Him and the Hulk? At the same time?”

“Basically,” he nodded. “As far as I can tell, anyways.”

“Gods, that must be awful for…for both of them, I guess.”

“I can’t imagine how shitty he must feel.”

“Tell me where he is.” 

“We’ve got a hangout on this floor. It’s like…a makeshift bedroom, I guess. We spend so much time in here we figured we might as well have, like, a napping area,” he explained. “It’s a little room down the hall. Right side.”

Thor gave a sharp nod and hurried towards the door. 

“Hey, be careful, okay?” Tony called after him. 

“Of course I will be!”

Just like Tony said, the room was like the beginnings of a proper bedroom. There was a small bookshelf to one side, a few soft, yellow lights scattered about, and in the corner, a massive collection of pillows and duvets. There might have been a mattress beneath it, but it was hard to tell. Especially with the person curled up on top of it all. 

All along his arms were patches of what looked like rashes, only a muddy green color. His veins bulged along his arms and neck. He was definitely taller than he should have been, and more built and muscular, too. Bruce (Hulk?) himself seemed more like he was knocked out rather than peacefully asleep. His dark eyebrows were furrowed in what seemed like distress or frustration, and he would twitch every now and then. Thor knelt beside him and ran a finger along one of the several tears in his tightened shirt.

“Hello, dear,” he whispered. 

The being before him grumbled something incomprehensible. Then, his eyes snapped open. Thor took his hand back and watched intently. 

“Bruce?” he asked carefully. 

“Y-Yes,” he whispered, then smacked the side of his head. “No!”

Thor’s brow furrowed in concern. “Hey…”

“No! No Banner.” He shook his head frantically. A pained expression crossed his face. “Banner…sorry. I-I’m sorry…he’s…”

“Look at me,” he whispered, cupping his cheek. Thor pulled him into a gentle kiss, delicately playing with his hair. He pulled away and took a shaky breath. Thor frowned slightly and took his hands.

“Look at me, darling,” he whispered again. Bruce was hesitant to meet his eyes, but when they met each other, Thor gave him a warm smile. 

“I just wanted to say I love you. So, so much.”

He nodded slowly. “L…love you…too.”

“Mhm.”

“Who…am I?” he whispered suddenly. Thor paused.

“I don’t know.”

“You don’t?”

He shook his head. “I mean…you aren’t exactly Hulk, but…but you aren’t fully Bruce either…”

“What am I?” The fear in his voice was more evident than before. 

“I don’t know, my love,” he said apologetically. “Do you feel more like one of them than the other?”

After a moment of thought, he replied. “Bruce.” 

“Are you sure?”

“…No. But…but I think I’m him…” 

“Okay,” he said softly. “Then we’ll get you back to being your old self.” 

“Promise?”

“I promise.” Thor gave him a smile. “How are you feeling?”

“Hurts…” Bruce sniffled. 

“I’m so sorry, my love,” he whispered, looking over his trembling muscles. “Just…focus on me. Everything’s going to be okay.”

“Gonna be okay…” he repeated, squeezing his eyes shut. “Th–Thor…”

“Yes, dear?” 

“He’s…I don’t want…” Bruce swallowed. “Make it stop…”

“I’m not sure how,” he admitted. “Try to…um, maybe think about things that help you relax?”

“Hugs,” he said quickly. “Hug me…”

Thor nodded and wrapped his arms around him. It was odd, since he was used to hugging a much smaller Bruce. The way he was now, their heights were just about matched. Nevertheless, Thor just pretended like it was a normal night. Just cuddling his boyfriend in bed, and nothing more. 

“How’s this?” he murmured, rubbing his thumb against a rough patch of skin. 

“Yes,” was all Bruce replied. Thor pressed a kiss just below his ear and hummed softly. It was an old Asgardian lullaby he remembered his mother singing to him as a child. Thor wasn’t the best singer, by any means, but he hoped it was calming. 

Apparently it was, since he started to feel Bruce start to shrink in his arms. He whimpered as he curled in on himself, his body still shaking and jerking. 

“Hush, hush, you’re alright, I’m here…” Thor whispered. Bruce took deep breaths. Everything had stopped. Thor looked down at him, trying to determine if he was fully back yet. The shirt he wore, while still ripped, seemed to fit him once more, and his skin was back to its usual color. 

“Bruce?” he asked. 

“Yeah…” Bruce turned to look at Thor. Tears streaked his face, but the look in his eyes was relief. He rolled over and hugged Thor tight. 

“Fuck…fuck. Okay. I’m okay, I’m okay,” he rambled to himself. “It’s fine…” 

Thor himself let out a sigh, happy that Bruce had come back to himself. “There. See? I told you we’d get you back.”

“That was…fuck.”

“Is everything alright, now?”

“Since you’re here,” he nodded. 

“What was that?”

“I don’t know,” Bruce shook his head. “I don’t know and I hope I never experience it again.”

“Hopefully you never will.” Thor stroked his curls. 

“Yeah…shit. Yeah.” Bruce glanced up at him. “Thank you…”

“Don’t thank me. I just want you safe and happy.”

Bruce smiled faintly. “I love you. So much, more than I could ever tell you. I’m…shit with words. You know that.”

“I do. But I love it.” Thor grinned. “It makes you yourself.” 

“See? I can’t do that,” he laughed softly. “Articulate words and all that…”

“Then just kiss me,” Thor mumbled.

Bruce did.