#SLOW DOWN OMG. WHAT
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new tmagp episode speedrunning canonising every tma character whose name starts with a G
#SLOW DOWN OMG. WHAT#celia theory sweep already...#tmagp#the magnus protocol#the magnus archives#tma#i guess??????
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The weird nerd in a labcoat that you talk to every week at the diner appears in front of your door with a rose in his hand wwyd?
#naurrr he's not a creep they already went out before and send chloe to her door before its just this time he wanted to make a cute gesture#like he just knocks on her door asking if she's up for another date lol#i feel a bit anxious about posting my art here all of sudden ngl skdjekaoa staphhhh#like partially idc what ppl thinks but also i care if ppl like me enough skdjskal stop 5 am brainnn#anyway omg i swear its only been 3 weeks since I last opened my csp and im crying i missed drawing waghsgsjqk 😭😭😭#i have a few more days to endure im so excited about resting and continuing my overdue commission wagjhsksakhq#but i do need a warm up though since i feel like im slowing down zzzzz#okay me sleep now snork mimimimimimimi#asukart#selfship#selfshipping#selfship art#selfshipping community#selfship community#self insert oc#self insert art#self insert community#oc x canon#si x canon#professor utonium#ppg professor
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ignore the fact i disappeared that was simple winter hibernation ( still sick and coughing out my lungs btw )
for a basically nonexistent context it’s currently 1:50 am my paper is literally just on my mattress hello hard surface who and this is the most abhorrent lighting and i COOKED (dubious) 🔥🔥🔥‼️🥶🥶🥶🥶🥶🥶🌶️🌶️✨🌶️😋😋🌶️😋😋🥺🥺💖💖✨✨
one of my ocs grgrggrjekslalksj I need to talk about them more on here nyways yeah uhm bye read the tags thanks
#★ ˎˊ˗ melonrambles!#guys. guess what. your dearest father#i mean melon#has returned with the goods omg this is so splendid wait wait why are you turning around#and leaving again wait no wAIT#too slow. ive disappeared with the wind 😱😱#on a less silly note writers block burnout and a bunch of other silly fun happy things got meshed together into this really ugly ball#and it may or may not have taken we like 3 full days to get down a single sentence#so. hahahaha#melon is sometime but definitely before February definitely definitely aaha im not gaslighting myself im not g-#and to like throw something at this feral audience i have ammassed#a bone#if you will#ill get a work out soon#plan smth special for our silly celebration ILY GUYS SM SHHSHSHKS UGH WAHHGHH 💖💖💖#and i am finally going to be poking that smau of mine that’s been on mine indefinite hiatus for far too long <43#i was honestly thinking of discontinuing it but the anemo men… im an anemo kisser I couldn’t possibly..#so. that should be all from me#ill be workin on a new tagging system when I get back fully hopefully#so this blog will look less like an active track wreck <3#giggles okay bye im off to do more silly bybye 🫡
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🫖🐭☁️🍚
#so i did meet my old friend from years ago yesterday. i was sooooo nervous omgggg. and i was waiting outside the café we agreed on#and then saw them walk in and i was like omgggg. the anxiety... but then i gathered courage and walked towards it and thry saw me thru the#window and came out and immediately hugged me. then they were like 'omg i've been so nervous. even more than before like a date!!'#so that made me relax a bit. i feel like i dont really fully estimate what i mean to them. maybe they care about me as well haha !!#then we just got our stuff and i chose a smoothie and was ready to pay but they just got it with their stuff (they work at this chain so#they got a discount). i feel so so bad & anxious when someone else pays for me. like i feel like a burden#but i asked twice if i should send them money for it and they were like no that's fine. so i had to tell myself to just shut up abt it 🥲#bc if u keep asking u make it into a thing and make them uncomfortable etc. so i really appreciated that and it was nice even if i felt bad#but yeah then we just sat down and talked. and it was so much easier to talk to them than i had been worried abt#like it flew nicely and yeah.. i feel like i forgot a lot abt them. like they're good at conversating. so they kept it going & even if i was#awkward it was fine for them. i did however get swept up in my own anxiety so as they asked me questions i answered#but then was too whirlwindy so i didnt really ask as much back and there were things i wanted to ask but didnt :')))#then they had cards and a card game with them. so we played for a bit too. and it was a lot of fun!!! (i was anxious and kinda slow lmao#bc when i dont know smth or the rules etc already my brain stops working so yeah.. even if it was simple games i was like um um what do i do#felt stupid but yeah again they didnt do anyhing to contribute to me feeling stupid but i still felt slow >.<#but i still thought that was so much fun. i wanna do more of that T-T like yeah...that was nice#then we took a lil longer walk to a bus stop before hastily said goodbye bc the busses came T-T#it was really really really nice tho. i have missed them a lot#and i didnt .. think we would ever see eachother again. i really didnt think this could happen#im so glad i somehow got brave enough to message them and im so so glad they wanted to see me too#i cant help but wish i could go back to when we were younger#and we spent every day in school together and messaged during the days and evenings and spent sm time together#when we went into the city like several times a week and took long walks. ahh... well. im glad we got to have those moments#& idk what will happen now. i really really want to see them again. even if we'll never be that close friends again i'd *wish* that we could#still be in touch. but im so bad at replying which doesnt go over great with them.. i'll try my best to reply quicker to them#*if* they message me. sadly i cant erase my avpd but i'll try my best to reply faster if and when they message)#they also complimented my sweater i was wearing (which is my fav sweater) !!!! and yeah.. they looked so cool. which they always have#and i kept thinking abt how nice their eye makeup was (i was too shy to compliment it tho bc im really bad at like 'nice' affectionate and#anything feeling related. like im so bad... so i couldnt say anything </3)#ugh it was just so nice to sit and talk with them. im so glad i went despite my fears. bc this was so good and nice :')))
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SILENT CITY ? THE CAGE ? LONE WOLF ? B3NDY ? A MOVIE ? JUST HOW MANY MORE CAN WE GET ????
#TAKE A BREAK MEATLY OMG ????#they working overtime what#chill chill you spoil us too much please relax slow down#we were already winning but we got more ???#batim bendy#bendy and the ink machine
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Nakano being portrayed as a clumsy idiot in the anime really sucks because he’s really more than that.
If anything I realized that for someone with such dumb luck, he is actually quite dexterous!
I mean, him saving Akiyama from Tanaka in a spur of the moment and then getting away quickly. Even Tanaka had to comment on how fast he was!
His entire suit encounter. He was dodging multiple shots and skilled hit men chasing him down and if that’s not badass idk what is. Sure he looked a bit clumsy as he did so, but he was doing it. And he still managed to try to keep Hirasawa safe.
His chase with Kei also shows how quick he thinks, though it’s not always right. But I think what mostly threw him off with the Kei fight was his hesitation. Tbf that would throw anyone off tho lol
And then BOTH car chases where he managed to get them where needed even with cop cars chasing or crowds of people around
His skill is literally running away but he’s too stubborn to do so completely from the fight. He keeps pushing forward and yk I love him for that.
#ajin#kou nakano#Kou nakano appreciation time#because I love him#and people need to love him more#and not just as his ‘omg dumb boy is cute’ way#but In his deeper characterization and how he is very much a flawed character besides intelligence#but In a completely right way#because yes he has noticeable flaws#and yes those flaws slow him down plenty#his intelligence level#his fears#his ideals#his overly good heart#but despite what everyone says about him and what he thinks of himself#despite him doubting himself SO much#he keeps pushing forward#he never stops#and that’s what makes Nakano Kou#he’s is the driving force that keeps going and keeps pushing for more even when Kei is ready to give up#and that’s why Kei NEEDED Kou#his perfect balance#Tazz talks
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I'm actually kind of mad after wearing a knee brace (with patella support!) for 2 days because I just went down for breakfast not wearing it and my kneecap was wobbling loosely in its socket like it's done for years and I could FEEL how wrong it was and just had the biggest "you LIVE like this??!" moment and now i GUESS I am wearing a knee brace every time I go near stairs forever because it turns out it's not ideal if parts of your body have their own plans for every joint movement.
Mobility aids <3
#mad at myself for not even noticing it was weird even though I've known I have the stretchy joints for years now#honestly I need a full like. Scientific observation from behind glass hooked up to machines and doing silly little tasks for science week#please find out what is happening in here#I also got 1 ankle support and out of curiosity slept in it last night#and omg one foot resting upright made me realise how much the other was flat on the bed#when I lay on my back#the same thing that got me diagnosed in the first place#the rheumatologist who'd just told me I don't have cancer because of the bloodwork had me lie down to examine#he took one look at my flat fuck friday feet and like actually yelled in alarm and recoiled#which took some explaining#anyway he poked and prodded me but he already had said 'oh you have hypermobility and it's given you fibro'#this is why specialists also have to keep up with all the other medicines too :P#(i spent a weekend with my medic friend recently and she has Stories oh my god)#(was too busy talking to look at my feet even as I told her I'd dislocated my ankle and knee as we talked XD)#POINT IS I'm very slow to notice things about my condition#I quit chocolate for a year because I worried it was giving me migraines#and was too busy having migraines to notice the chocolate wasn't what gave me migraines
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I still cant believe dream works was like? You know what? Why not just show a moment of a genuine REAL panic attack experienced by a recognizable beloved animated character from a franchise everyone knows and loves and then not make a joke about it but rather show it as a real moment in a way that the audience can relate to
#puss and boots the last wish#spoilers#like when puss and boots had a panic attack#like A REAL PANIC ATTACK#there were no jokes about it#there was no dramatic music#just still silence#as he hyperventilated and laid there#like that was so real#and when perrito came#and didnt knoe what to do so he just rested his head on him to try and calm in down in the only way he knew how#and then we watched as his breath slowly calmed down. there was no rush. there was no instantly calm. a slow gradual pacing#as his breath calmed. it was just so real. so raw. they used that moment to fully show the true fear of the situation#in all of the action sequences of tje movie it qas such a stark difference bur omg it was so good.
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the high republic keeps giving me these odd 'just left of canon' AU ideas that really don't make that much sense and don't go anywhere but there are all of these voices floating around in my brain about it
'just do what you used to do pre-'being able to finish anything' (c. 1998-2018), write the parts you want to read to exorcise them from your brain and keep them in a document to read later, just for you, you don't have to put work into 'plot' or whatever'
'I don't know, some of them you could reshape into something that DOES make sense, like your idea for an expansion of the sort-of-rushed path of deceit horror ending'
'girl you had a to do list for today, what happened to editing 'the station', you need to focus up'
'and anyway, look at all the other AUs that don't make any sense, why are you so worried about your 'but what if Jora lived' AU when there are so many high school AUs (*gritted teeth* and time travel AUs) that also don't go anywhere, just do it, have fun, who cares'
'also GIRL, you have your plate full with WIPs, what happened to being happy you found the discipline to commit to long term projects, why do you think you have time for any of this...'
these are the wolves that live inside me.
ok I REALLY have to go edit now...but maybe as a reward...later....we can just work a little bit on the silly AUs that won't go anywhere?
#also 'silly' no they're all deeply tragic as well i meant silly in terms of 'this doesn't really make any sense'#writing problems#what a fun hobby i have to talk about exorcising shit from my brain and it's 'but what if kev and zallah briefly escape the cave at the end#like that's it that's what's haunting me#where's that post that's like 'hobbies are funny when i crochet i'm like look i made a bunny and with writing it's like i am tormented'#i am TORMENTED by VISIONS#also yeah i loved path of deceit but it is a flaw of most of the YA novels so far the climaxes are like WHOA slow down#similar to out of the shadows were it was just like 'OMG WHAT'S GOING TO HAPPEN THE NIHIL HAVE REATH AND IMRI' oh it's literally fine#i wish we had gotten more of their perspective entering the tunnels and finding the artifacts i was reeling from how fast it happened#so like....that one might be legit#there is no reason for the 'jora lives AU' it's not even a 'what would her reaction be to the rest of the actual plot dez/the drengir/etc#it's like a completely different beast there's no logic#i might do it anyways who knows gotta exorcise the visions somehow
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When it has been entirely too long since you've exfoliated so you do it and then you feel like a freshly molted reptile of some kind
#energizing.#i used to exfoliate like 2-3x/week when i was in my teens/early 20s and then when i was like 22 my skin started developing all kinds#of like problems (still not sure what the root cause is but i have a hunch its the water quality where i live. i moved in here when i was a#few months from turning 22) and exfoliating made my skin soooo irritated and itchy and red all of a sudden so i had to slow down..... and#then i stopped exfoliating altogether because it got so bad. now i exfoliate like 3x/year max and NEVER in January/February#but omg when i do it. it feels. so goddamn good. i still get a bit of irritation but its worth it for how much better my skin looks and#feels after it calms down. also i never exfoliate my face except for using a washcloth to gently scrub it every once in a while!#god i wish i had nornal skin :(
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I got paid real adult money to watch Spider-Man, play solitaire, and compete against my boss in Tetris today
#slow days at the axe throwing bar!#we have a huge projector for sports but there werent any sports today so my boss said 'what do we want to watch?'#and the bartender narrowed it down to spiderman and something else#and when i heard spiderman i demanded we watch that. its my favorite movie#omg wait let me tell you something. so i was standing against the front desk and watching the movie#and a woman walked in. i turned around to greet her and she said 'i just wanted to see what you were watching'#she glanced at the screen and said 'oh okay!' and then just. left#iconic. and we have solitaire on our computer (i work the front desk) so ive been playing it a lot lately#but today i was getting bored of it so i played tetris on the computer and my boss saw#so next time i got up to watch the movie he hopped on tetris and beat my high score. and then i hopped on and beat him#now we have a tetris war going on#i got paid $15 an hour for that
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Trying to write my bachelor thesis is a really humbling reminder that my dyslexia isn’t just some funny quirk but something that makes my life significantly harder🥲
#dyslexia#why am I so slow omg it’s embarrassing#i can’t concentrate#I’ve been doing really well academically in recent years this is so humbling omg#i just submitted something really bad and the worst thing is I was pretty much told what I should do but I couldn’t write it down fast enoug#and after asking two times I was to embarrassed to ask again🙃
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⋆ ˚。⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚。⋆
#today i thought about this a lot because#it was a veryyyy bad day noise wise#it goes up and down even if im generally easily disturbed by noise#but sometimes i feel more ok with it and can cope somewhat#but some days it is just extra bad and it is physically painful and im constantly stressed#today was one of those days where i almost just broke down and started screaming and crying#i managed not to. but god my upper body hurts a lot bc i get so tense and i cannot relax#all the CONSTANT noise is so painful lol#so yes i thought about it a lot today bc i was doing bad and i realized.. even if i already know#how like.. amazing it is that i can feel such a way .. and that in this existence a safe space for me does exist#his voice just does smth to me on metaphysical (is that the word?) and undescribable levels. it just /reaches/ me#it's so cool that i have physical reactions to just hearing the sound of his voice? i feel my heartbeat slow and my body relaxes and im like#idk how to explain but i feel soothed to my bones and my soul feels cradled. it's like his voice just erases everything else#i just think that is so amazing? like how can that be? how can i experience all of this inside of my existence?#im just in awe of how that can work. how this person's voice has such effects on my being. how it makes my hyper stressed body just feel#okay and calm and soft when i exist in the space of hearing his voice..#maybe i sound crazy :$ .. but thats just how i feel. like today when i was on a walk..#and omg it was noise overload it was crazy i felt my entire neck and throat and shoulders hurt so bad and i wanted to scream and rip my#hair out. i just kept imagining his voice and wanting to just be in that space and soothed state my body enters his voice alone puts me in#im not sure if thats weird or bad of me.. :c but thats just what happens!!! and selfishly i crave it!! i'd never be demanding or forceful#i have more than i couldve ever dreamed or asked for. i can listen and breathe and be ok. and i can imagine his voice too..#soft fluffy cloud that envelopes me.. maybe i *am* crazy or too intense but its just the truth#and ig what im trying to say it is that im infinitely thankful & grateful for this. that i can have felt this. & know it exists like wow??
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Dude the friends ep is so good oh my GOD
#A FRIENDS A FRIEND WHO KNOWS WHAT BEING A FRIEND IS#ohfggggf#ween#AND FUCKING I GOT TO PUT THE HAMMER DOWN#WHAT THE HELL!!!!#AND KING BILLY?????#LIGHT ME UPPPPP. BEFORE YOU KILL MEEEEE.#and omg slow down boy#holy shit#perfect ep#the friends ep#the friends ep is hypnotically bi#<- idk when i used that tag but. yea
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Oh to be a peasant minding your own business only for a royal to catch sight of you and think “what a funky looking creature, I must interact” and now they simply do not leave you alone
#your highness please leave me tf alone#your highness I almost got assassinated because they thought I was important#wtf do you mean I’m important#your highness I refuse to step foot in the castle— is that a kitty#I’ll go into the castle. just once. for the kitty.#AHH THE KITTY IS THE CASLTES WIZARD?#I’ve been bamboozled! tricked! your highness I will NOT wear that#wtf am I wearing#your highness lemme go home I had soup boiling over the fire#… tell me more about these horses of yours#OMG HORSIES HI— what do you mean we’re gonna ride them#YOUR HIGHNESS I’VE NEVER RIDDEN A HORSE#SLOW TF DOWN YOUR HIGHNESS OR IMMA KILL YOU#that wasn’t so bad no we’re not doing it again#your highness stop stealing my glasses
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saw someone in the ST tag wondering about how they got the deer imagery everywhere these days and like completely unrelated but it reminded me of how many times i saw wild deers this summer like it happened "only" three times but that's three times more than usual so~ two instances (both in broad daylight) with young stags where they crossed my path, first time from not too far, second time from way too close (i was driving and almost ran it over but thank the Lawd i wasn't going too fast and managed to hit the brakes to let it cross the road).
now the third time is the one that left the biggest impression on me. basically i was driving back home from my bortle 3 spot and this road at night, especially during summer, is the "blink and you might miss the foxes, cats, does, hares and what have you crossing and hit them" type. so i'm used to paying extra attention to the roadside the entire drive. so there i am, driving in the middle of the night under the beautiful starry skies, tasty music in my ears and then i see the bIGGEST fucking stag i have ever seen in my life standing there by the roadside. it was keeping completely still and looking my way, and i mean it all happened so fast but like idk seeing it not fully lit bc it wasn't directly in the headlights made this whole encounter even more breathtaking and memorable. it truly felt like witnessing an unearthly apparition and i don't think i'll ever forget it.
#txtp#it was SO big and SO close omg#they're truly majestic beings i get why people would revere and venerate this animal and why there's so much symbolism around it#like you get this sense of strength and nobility from them#and seeing it the way i did they almost feel..... idk.. “divine” in a way#seeing does from afar at sunset is one thing seeing a huge fully antlered stag barely a few feet away at night is truly something else#and seeing does feels “magical” enough as it is#also i'm SO grateful it kept still and didn't try to cross the road#like what if i'd hurt it bc i couldn't slow down fast enough??? ;______;#urgh truly hope this never happens
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