#SERIOUSLY Y'ALL THE RANCHERS

[andyling]

y'all wtf did they put in the water this session

[rinthelonely]

The Chain were in the rancher's Hyrule and were currently fighting monsters that none of them recognised. They had green skin, they all had a scarf covering their face and they used either a club or a bow as weapons.

They were just about reaching the upper hand until Twilight came out of nowhere and shouted: "STOP!" Both parties stopped fighting and turned to look at the rancher.

"Rancher, they're monsters! They need to be killed before they cause trouble to the innocents!" Warriors said, confused and a bit betrayed. Twilight simply walked to them, standing in between the Chain and the monsters. He turned to the monsters and... started signing to them?

Everyone were confused, and that confusion only increased when one of the monsters signed back. The sign language was unfamiliar to the Chain, it varied from smooth hand motions to really aggressive motions.

After a while Twilight turned back to the Chain. "Y'all want roasted meat?" What? Legend was the one who found his voice first. "What do you mean by that? And what the fuck were you talking about?"

"They thought that you were going to take over their territory so they tried to chase you away, but instead, they had to fight you because you didn't take the warning shot seriously. I told them that you are travelling with me and that you haven't had good experiences with monsters. So they're apology to us is to offer us some freshly roasted meat"

The Chain now stared at Twilight with confusion and disbelief. "Pup, can you at least tell us what these monsters are and why do they listen to you?" Time asked, these monsters had to special if Twilight actually trusted them.

"These are bulblins, and I'm an acquaintance of their king, King Bulblin. Now, it's better to accept their apology if you don't want to them again." The rancher kept his answer short and... somewhat informative. So with no other choice, the Chain followed the bulblins to their temporary camp to have some actually good meat.

------------------------------------------

This is something just for fun. I like to imagine that Twilight sometimes hangs out with bulblins when he comes across them and the bulblins taught him their sign language. Let the confusion begin among the Links.

[splish--splash--minecraft]

So...I've reached 100 followers now (wowie, thanks guys <3) so I've decided to do a little poll to figure out what AU I work on next!

I'm working on a fic for the tiny apartment AU at the moment, but I'm close to finishing it. My plan was to take a little break from that AU once the fic is posted and work on something else (pizza AU?) but I've decided instead that I'll let my followers decide what they want to see from me!

I have...a lot of options. Including tiny apartment AU, since I'm certainly not opposed to working more on it! I've just been kinda focused on it a lot lately, and I have other AUs. But if enough people want me to keep working on it, well...I won't say no.

I have...a lot of options. I'll give brief summaries of each one to help you decide what you want the most! Some also have more written for them than others, while others still are much longer than others (one AU I have dubbed the "longfic" since...well, it's going to be long).

Below the poll is a summary of the AUs, in the order that they appear in the poll.

Pizza AU

The AU in which Grian works at a pizza place and Scar comes in every week at a ridiculous hour to get a pizza. Found here. This fic is fully outlined, though I've not written much for chapter 2.

Tiny Apartment AU

The one you all know and love. No? Just me? Oh well. I still have a LOT planned for this AU. So many WIPs I've started and still other fics for the series I have planned but haven't actually started. If this wins, I might do another poll with some of the WIPs and let y'all decide which one to work on from there. Maybe.

Lifeguard AU

This one's a fun one! Scar works as a lifeguard. Pearl does, too, and one day she drags her brother (Grian) out of the house and convinces (bribes) him to go with her. He complains the whole way there...until he gets a look at Scar. And when Scar's shift ends and he goes to talk to Grian, he decides that maybe going out of the house to the pool isn't the worst idea. I don't have much for this AU yet. I've started it, but it's not a lot, and I only have some ideas for some scenes. This one also has t4t scarian. just 'cause. Both are transmasc

Longfic

Called such because...well, it's gonna be long. It's currently at about 7k words. Technically it's the long series - it'll be a series of fics that span over the entirety of the life series. Each fic is a season, and it also features some stuff back on Hermitcraft in between each. For now, I'll just work on 3rd life. Oh, also, it's mainly from Scar's POV (though there will likely also be a fic with some scenes from Grian's POV). Basically a deep dive into 3rd life, with canon scenes and some of the...in between.

Royalty AU

Scar is a prince, and Grian the knight assigned to be his bodyguard. Except it's really more to keep him in line, because Scar has the tendency to go off and do his own thing, so his parents assign Grian -someone known to take no shit and takes his duty very seriously - as his bodyguard. At the start, they don't really like each other that much. Over time, though, they get closer. Much closer.

Fallen Watcher AU

You guys remember that guardian angel AU? This is that but I've reworked it a bit. Rather than being a guardian angel, Grian is a Watcher. He's put in charge of Watching Scar. The Watchers have some sort of plan I haven't quite figured out yet, but it involves Scar dying. But Grian...has grown attached to him. He doesn't want Scar to die. But as a Watcher, he's not allowed to do more than just Watch. But he interferes anyway, saving Scar's life, and the Watchers are furious so they cast him out. So now he has to deal with being mortal all while the guy he saved the life of keeps flirting with him.

Ranchers fic

Something that's...not scarian! Wow. Nobody tell them but this is mainly for Grace. It's a double life ranchers fic with (poorly) hidden injury. Since...well, kind of hard to hide an injury when the other can feel your pain.

So...yeah! There's the AUs for this poll. I have more, of course, but these are sorta the main ones. Whichever wins I'll work on after I finish a tiny apartment AU fic. Depending on which AU wins, I may also work on the second place winner alongside it. We'll see.

You're also free to reblog to try and rig it! Bribe people. Try to convince others to vote. do whatever idc have fun

[ringtownrangerlark]

Just heard someone refer to their job as their "trainer class" and I just...

I know other regions are more trainer dominant, but seriously?

I am a ranger. Period. That is not a sub-type of trainer, that's it's own identity.

"That rancher is a trainer!" "That schoolteacher is a trainer!" "That preschooler is a trainer!"

Y'all are wild.

[bokettochild]

Why?

Inspired by a little back and forth I had with @apparitianhanako the other day

This may end up becoming part of a 5+1 fic, but I just really wanted to make Time mess up and accidentally call Warriors "dad"

I hope y'all enjoy!

  Wind had decided to be annoying.  

  No, really. Wind woke up that morning and decided with himself that he was going to annoy his brothers, and he wasted no time in doing so.  

 Wild and Hyrule caught on fast, and after a few moments, decided to keep to themselves and watch the chaos rather than getting involved. It was funnier to not be the person losing their mind, and Wild had even prepared little bags of nuts and popped corn to munch on while they enjoyed the suffering of the rest of their family.  

 Twilight was the next to catch on. The rancher had cocked a brow and fallen silent almost immediately, and when Wind had turned his wiles on Legend, the older boy had only smirked at him and promptly shut his own trap, exchanging a nod and grin with Twilight over the sailor’s head.  

 That was okay though. Legend and Twilight were used to kids, Wild and Hyrule were kids, and none of them were Wind’s main targets anyway. Of course, Sky wasn’t either because he was just too incredibly patient to be any fun, but Four, Time and Warriors? Oh, Wind had his eyes set on those three!  

 “Wind hurry up, we need to keep moving.” Four called back to him.  

 Wind hadn’t meant to lag behind, but Warriors had pointed out something on the roadside and he’d paused a bit longer than all the others to look at it, and even when they’d kept moving, he hadn’t really wanted to move on. It was rather odd to think that the lovely flower was dangerous to the point of being deadly, but he knew better than to stray too close. Still, he found that when he looked back towards the path, the others had already made it fair ways away, and Legend and Twilight were looking back with expressions that said they were frustrated and worried that they hadn’t noticed his absence sooner.  

 Seriously, he wasn’t a kid! He could look out for himself! They didn’t need to fuss so!  

 “Coming!” He called, moving back towards the rest of them, deep breaths of relief sighing from the two older heroes as he once more joined the flock.  

 “You can’t wander off like that.” Four reminded him gently. “Legend’s going to have an aneurism if you do.”  

 And here was his chance.   

 “Why?”  

 There was a snort behind him, and he didn’t need to look to know Legend and Twilight were exchanging knowing looks and probably already losing the tension in their shoulders. Good, that meant his nonsense would be making them chill out, double bonus!  

 “Because Legend’s a fussy worry-wort and he doesn’t like having us out of his sight.” Four answered. “Same with Twilight, or Time, or even Wars, they-”  

 “Why?” Wind interrupted, looking over innocently as Four startled, not expecting to be interrupted.  

 “Um, well, they care about all of us. I’m pretty sure it’s also trauma related-”   

 The older heroes were stiffening, he could tell. Legend was grumbling and Twilight’s footsteps were less even. At the front of the group, he could see Warriors and Time’s shoulders drawing tight. That wouldn’t do! He was trying to lighten the mood today! Trying to make them laugh, those who he wasn’t trying to annoy. But being annoyed was better than being tense, and if they took it well things would be fine. He didn’t want to upset them though!  

  Four continued, either not noticing or trying to make a point. “-because they have issues with letting other people go because of problems in the past. It manifests in different ways, but Legend and Twilight specifically don’t like letting the rest of us out of their sight for too long.”  

 He pushed again. “Why?”  

 Four stared at him, brows furrowing, and he wondered if the other had caught on to what was happening yet. “Because they don’t have a certainty that we’ll come back.”  

 “Why?”  

 Four frowned, eyes flickering between violet and blue as if he was trying to decide if Wind was being annoying on purpose or genuinely curious. He was being annoying, but Four was nice and gave him a chance. “Because enough people in their pasts have either died or left them behind unexpectedly, so they can’t trust we won’t do the same.”  

 “Why?”  

 The frown deepened and Four sighed. “Wind, stop that.”  

 “Why?”  

 “Because it’s annoying.” The smithy huffed, even as Twilight could be head sniggering softly behind them.  

 “He doesn’t quite get how this works, does he?” Legend whispered, not too quiet that he couldn’t be heard clearly by the shortest hero, but enough that Time didn’t turn back to see what they were up to.  

 Four scowled back over his shoulder at the two farm-boys, but neither offered answers, and Wind silently thanked them in his mind as he continued his quest to be as annoying as feasibly possible. He knew both ends of this game well, both because of Aryll and Tetra, and he took pleasure in getting to be the antagonizer once in a blue moon.   

  At his side, the smithy shook his head. “Wind, stop it. This game is all well and good, but I’m not in the mood right now.”  

 “Why?”  

 Violet flickered to red, green, blue, and back again to green as Four turned away huffing a deep breath and muttering under his breath as he quickened his pace, moving up alongside Wild and Hyrule and shooting them glares when they giggled at his pain.  

 One hero down, two more to go.  

 Time was his next victim, just because he knew Warriors would be the hardest. The man was used to him after all, and Time, while also used to him, was a little less experienced in dealing with Wind’s chaos, and the sailor was planning on abusing that to the fullest. 

 Despite Four’s warning glare, he quickened his pace and moved up towards the front of the group. Warriors and Time both greeted him with smiles, the captain reaching to ruffle his curls fondly, and Wind smiled up at them as naturally as he could. Warriors was already on guard at the smile, but Time was blissfully clueless as he continued along, entirely unaware of the annoying capabilities of the sailor at his side. 

  “Hey, Wind, what did you think of that flower back there?” Time asked. 

  “It was pretty cool.” He answered honestly. “I’m curious how it makes that smoke stuff Wars said could kill you though, it doesn’t look like it has anywhere to do that.” 

  “Small things are often the deadliest.” The captain mused warily, glancing back at where Four was shooting him a warning glare. The man took note of it, eyes turning to their youngest dubiously as he waited for the impending chaos to strike. 

  Time nodded. “There’s something to be said for that which goes unnoticed. It’s easier to do things when you’re small, and people underestimate you most of the time.” Their leader glanced down to Wind with a smile, and it almost made the youngest hero feel bad for what he was about to do. 

  Almost. 

  “I wonder why that is.” Because with Time, you had to start out sneaky. He couldn’t just start being a pain, he had to trick Time into playing along.  

  Surprisingly, it was Warriors that walked right into his trap. “Mostly because smaller beings are thought to be young or inexperienced, like yourself, Wind; people underestimate you because they assume you haven’t had time to learn the things you would need in order to survive.” 

  “Why?” 

  Sharp blue eyes darted his way at the question, the captain smiling warmly. Man, Warriors was doing the very thing he’d just been talking about! It was entirely his own fault that he had to suffer for it too. “Because most people take years to master the skills most of us possess.” 

  “Why?” 

  Time’s face twitched slightly, brows furrowing a bit as he glanced down for a moment at the teen at his side, but Warriors continued answering the question. “Because for most people, their lives don’t ride on them mastering particular skills.” 

  Wind grinned up at the captain cheekily. “Why?” 

  Understanding dawned in Time’s eyes, but Warriors continued on, gaze flashing with a hint of mischief even as their leader began to frown. “Because Hylia doesn’t call every person to her side to protect the world, just us.” 

  “Why?” 

  “Because we’re heroes.” 

  “Why?” 

  “Because the goddesses chose us.” 

  “Why?”  

  Time sighed, heavy and long, but Warriors didn’t do anything but shoot the man a smile, continuing along bright and cheery and unbothered by Wind’s questions. “Because we hold all the capabilities to be heroes. With the right push in the right direction, we’ve been exactly what Hyrule needed to protect it in each of our own times.” 

  “Why?” How many times would he need to ask to get Warriors to sigh and shake his head? With Four it had only been about seven times before the smithy walked away with a scowl. He hadn’t gotten to Time yet, but the man was beginning to give him a Look that would be a whole lot more effective if Wind hadn’t seen Time make the same expression as an eleven-year-old.  

  “Because that’s who we are.” Warriors answered, gaze warm and sparkling with a challenge as it met the sailor’s. “We’re protectors and guardians of Hyrule and its people, and we protect them in their times of need.” 

  Shoot, was Warriors going to turn his fun game into a self-worth lesson? 

  Wind spared a look back at the heroes behind him, catching sight of Sky’s smile, Twilight’s thoughtful frown, Hyrule and Wild’s downcast and flushed faces and Legend’s intent stare the captain’s way. 

  Well, they weren’t irritated? This was good, but even if he needed his brothers to remember how important and amazing they were for all that they’d done, he was still trying to make them laugh. 

  “Why?” 

  Time sighed. That was eight. 

  “I don’t know about you, but I do it because I want my people to be safe.” Warriors answered evenly, brows furrowing just a bit, but not in irritation so much as thoughtfulness. “Hyrule’s seen a lot through the ages, and her people have suffered more than the kingdoms around her because of Ganon and other monsters like him. Our people deserve to live and peace and prosperity after all they’ve gone through.”  

  Shoot, should he question the validity of that? 

  Bright blue shot to him, challenging. The captain’s brows were raised, and he was smirking in that way that said he thought he’d won. 

  Wind smirked back, not even trying to pretend anymore. “Why?” 

  One of Warriors’ brows inched higher, but he answered anyways. “When people suffer a lot, they have a right to rest and peace. Like all of us, when we’ve been on the road a long time, Hylia will let us rest a while at Lon Lon Ranch or Legend’s house, and sometimes ether Four’s or your places.” 

  “Why?” He was going to win this, whatever it was. 

  “Because Hylia cares for her servants, even if she can’t save them from their fates.” Legend’s gaze suspiciously dropped at those words. “She isn’t a cruel goddess, Wind.” 

  “Why?” 

  Bright lights flickered, warm and real and in no ways an attempt at frustrating him. “Because Hylia is Sun, you know? And Sun is a kind person.” 

  “Why?” 

  The captain smirked, looking over to Sky. “Probably because of hanging out with her boyfriend so much.” 

  Sky flushed slightly, but smiled. 

  “Why?” 

  “Because Sky is a kind person, and it’s hard not to be the same when you’re around him. You just don’t want to upset him or disappoint him.” 

  Surprise took over the face of their brother, but Warriors turned back towards the front, continuing along his steady march as if he hadn’t just touched their skyloftian with his words. 

  “Why?”   

  Another glance from royal blue eyes, another sigh from Time, another snigger from Twilight near the back of the group. “Because, Sky is Sky.” 

  “Why?” 

  “How about you ask him?” 

  So, Wind turned to Sky, who was shaking his head with a knowing smile, but who answered anyway. “Because of the people around me.” 

  And before Wind could do anything, Warriors grinned, sharp and bright. “Why?” 

  Time groaned. “Oh my gosh, Dad!” 

  Behind them there was a squawk. Twilight tripped over his own feet and stumbled into Legend who only barely caught him. Wild spun around at the sound of his mentor’s shout, and he accidentally knocked into Hyrule in the process. Hyrule himself had stopped walking to stare, Sky had tripped and only barely caught himself, Four only shook his head and kept walking, looking pained and Wind was snickering brightly as Warriors bust up laughing.  

  “Sorry, Sapling, I couldn’t help myself.” 

  Time chuffed under his breath and rolled his eye. “You are an adult.” 

  “Yes, yes I am.” The captain chuckled, reaching over and tugging Time’s ear gently. “But I don’t let that make me act like a boring grown up who can’t take or make a joke.” 

  Their leader cocked a disapproving brow, but Wind jumped in before Time could ruin his opening. “Why?” 

  Time sighed, looking to the heavens as if for patience, and Legend, the only person not currently losing his mind at Time’s slip up, laughed. 

  Warriors grinned. “Because, I never would have survived you two gremlins if I couldn’t, you’re just too chaotic.” 

  Time huffed, looking resigned as Wind asked his question again. “Why?” 

  Warriors just shrugged. 

[thesacredtwink]

A Wolf in Kings Clothing

Chapter 2

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Gathered around one of the inns tables, the nine men look down at the open piece of paper. At the head of the table, Wind stands on his tiptoes to get a better view of the document, squinting his eyes as if that will make the unfamiliar hylian script make sense.

"Well?" Time asks.

"It's not good," Twilight responds with a sigh. "The Captain wasn't off the mark yesterday. So far, things are at a stalemate but Castle Town is blocked off. They have water thanks to the main fountain, but food..." The Rancher trails off.

"How long does the Princess think they can last?"

Twilight scans the page.

"A month, maybe more if the rationing goes to plan."

Legend snorts, crossing his arms over his chest.

"That's unlikely."

Warriors makes a nose of agreement, unfortunately familiar with the logistics of keeping a town fed under the pressures of attack. From beside the tall blond, Hyrule speaks up.

"So we're helping, right?"

"No duh," Wind mumbles, earning himself a smack on the shoulder from Four. Warriors smirks and shakes his head at the antics, before slipping back into seriousness.

"I stand by my assessment from last night. It takes an army to fight an army, and we are good fighters. But-" He shakes his head, letting the unspoken hang around the table.

Sighing deeply, Twilight pushes the letter away and drags a hand through his hair.

"Any ideas, Pup?"

Looking around, the Rancher finds that all eyes are on him. This is his era, his home, and by that virtue makes the Ordonian the best source of knowledge in spite of not being the most senior. Warriors words echo in his mind, and its one of those times where Twilight hates to find himself agreeing with the soldier. He runs a hand down his face, thinking hard. They aren't enough on their own, and tempting though it is to try and attempt a rescue of Castle Town, its not the smart thing to do. Unbidden, the memory of his dream pushes its way to the front of Twilights mind. He can almost feel the breath on the shell of his ear as green painted lips whisper a proverb that was once as foreign to him as the person who said it.

"One grain of sand..." he mutters to himself.

"What was that, Twi?" Four asks.

Twilight shakes his head.

"Nothing. But I think I know some people who would be willing to help. Just-" he sucks in a breath "-I'm gonna need y'all to trust me, okay?"

Around the table, some of the others exchange glances, and Twilight doesn't have to look to know that Time is looking at him curiously. At the far end of the table, Wild raps his knuckles against the wooden surface, drawing everyone's attention.

"We trust you," Wild signs, face serious and motions firm, before looking around at the other heroes as if daring them to disagree with him. No one does, and the ball of stress that has started to build in the Rancher's stomach eases slightly at the support from his protégé. Now, he can only hope that the rest of this goes smoothly.

---

The desert was hot, far hotter than any other place the Ordonian had visited before. Though, it's no cooler now than it was the last time he stepped foot in the sandy place. He doesn't know why he came back, doesn't know what he expected to find other then painful memories. But staying in the village was too hard. Everything was different now, or maybe its that he was different while everything else was the same. Either way, staying in Ordon felt wrong. Link had hoped that, after everything, maybe life could return to normal. He doubted it though.

A week into his journey, when he had bent over the river flowing into Hyrule Field and caught sight of his reflection, Link knew those doubts were right.

Lines, faint but unmissable, rested on his forehead and beneath his eyes. They could almost be mistaken for smudges of coal from the mornings fire, if it weren't for the way they mimicked the white pattern on the muzzle of his wolf form. Around his neck, the curse shard weighed like an anchor, keeping Link from turning away. He stopped his hand half way to his face, looking at his frozen reflection and the anguish that danced in his eyes.

There would never be any going back.

After that, Link wandered, spending a few days on the road and a few in the castle - Princess Zelda quietly understanding, giving the Rancher room to exist without offering judgement. When the Rancher finally left, she saw him off personally, wrapping Link in a hug unbecoming of her status.

By the time he reaches the desert, the marks on his face have deepened, standing dark against his copper skin.

Underfoot, the sand gives with every step. Occasionally his boots slip, forcing Link to focus on the world around him. Its good - a distraction- and it keeps the Ordonian from truly succumbing to his thoughts. Sweat drips down his brows, and although the physical exertion does claim most of his attention, it's not quite enough to fully drive away the thoughts of her.

Midna.

His heart clenches at her name. In the weeks since the Twili left, the Rancher has done his best to not think of her. Deep down, he knows that doing so isn't fair to either of them. Minda deserves the chance to be remembered, and he deserves the chance to move on. But the emotions attached to the memory of the Princess are confusing, and if Link is being entirely honest, he isn't sure he wants to know what they are.

Link's attention wavers for only a few seconds, but its enough. His feet slip out from under him, and the Rancher find himself faceplanting in the sand. He sputters as he pushes himself up, spitting out as much of the offending grit as he can. He never hears the footsteps that approach, and when the press of a cool metal blade against his neck captures his attention, Link doesn't dare to breathe.

"Well now," a female voice says from above him, "What have we here?"

The way she pronounces her 'v' sticks to her lips, rounding the sound till it is closer to a 'b', and her 'r' catches on her tongue reminiscent of a cat. Slowly, Link lets his gaze look up- and up, and up, and sweet Hylia up- until finally stopping on a pair of brilliant yellow eyes and sharp grin. Though it's not the time for it, Link reconfirms his assessment. Definitely like a cat.

---

"Hey Rancher, how much further?"

Twilight resists the urge to sigh. It's the sixth time Legend has asked that question. He knows his Hyrule is one of the larger ones, especially in comparison to the Veteran's home era. But even that understanding isn't enough to keep the usually level headed man from wanting to smack his friend. Before the Twilight can give into his desire to growl, the Chain rounds a bend and a small house perched on the edge of a cliff overlooking Lake Hylia comes into view.

"We're close," Twilight says, and tries not to be offended on behalf of his home at the small chorus of relieved whispers that break out behind him.

Wind jogs up beside him.

"So this is where your friends live?" the Sailor asks.

Twilight shakes his head.

"No, this is how we get to where my people live."

"Oh," Wind says, then after a moment, adds "And how are we getting there?"

For the first time since the group of heroes learned about the situation brewing outside the Castle, Twilight smiles.

"You'll see,"

He's been looking forward to this part.

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #368

“whatever doesn’t kill you, is gonna leave a scar”

Have you ever bought a YouTuber’s merch? My favorite shirt is the Day of the Dead design by Cloak, which is Markiplier's and jacksepticeye's clothing brand. Mom's friend/former co-worker also got me a Ninja Sex Party shirt because she knew I liked them. There are SO MANY YouTubers I wanna support by buying shirts. Do you think oatmeal tastes better when made with water or milk? Milk, 110%. Have you ever left a note in a library book? No. What time of day do you prefer to wash your hair? Morning. Has anyone ever spread lies about you? Yes. Have you ever taken a photograph with a celebrity? If so, did it turn out the way you wanted, or do you wish you could retake it? No. If you could move out of your home country permanently, would you? If so, where would you go? If it didn't mean being so very far from my family, I would love to move to Canada. Is there a celebrity that everyone else seems to love, but you find totally overrated? Why is it that you don’t like them? I legit don't know who's considered currently popular, and I especially don't know who they are as people. If you could volunteer for any charity, which one would you choose? Do you think it’s more important to help humans, or are animal and environmental charities equally important? Something relating to animals, and I think they're both equally important. Do you prefer holidays where you relax, or actually do things? I like a mix. Something chill, but you still do some stuff as a family. Do you think that after we die our spirit is still alive? Yes. Has anybody ever told you that you could be a model? Someone has mistaken me for a model in a picture I once took. It was one of the most flattering things I've ever heard, haha. Do you use different kinds of moisturizer for different body parts? ie. hand lotion for your hands, face cream for your face. Or do you just use one moisturizer for all body parts? Yes. Have you ever felt like you were someone’s rebound? No. Has anybody ever broken up with you over something really pathetic? What was it? Have you ever been dumped in a disrespectful way? (eg. through text, through a friend..) I have 100% been dumped in a very cowardly and disrespectful way; after dating Jason for nearly four years and being very serious, he broke up with me very abruptly over Facebook Messenger. His reason was valid, but at the same time, he NEVER talked to me about it. Apparently my depression was dragging him down. If he'd fucking communicated it, I would have explored new treatment options so goddamn fast. But no, he decided to snap his fingers and disappear. That's exactly WHY it was so traumatic, I think: it was so unexpected and sudden. Did you have a lot of role models as a kid? Animal enthusiasts like Steve Irwin and Jeff Corwin for sure. Do you feel like anyone looks up to you? Why or why not? God no. I'm just... not someone to aspire to be like. What was the last thing you found offensive? I'm not sure. Who is the nicest person you know? My mom. Do you feel safe in your country? I feel safe in NC, rather. Like I don't expect an atom bomb or terrorist attack or something in this obscure area. In the U.S.A. itself, sometimes I do, sometimes I don't. America is definitely not loved by every other country. Do you feel safe where you live? Not in this city, no. Have you been falsely diagnosed with something by a bad doctor? Yup. Did y'all know I apparently have ADHD? I know, shocking. Have you ever had a doctor refuse to treat you? No. Name the strangest game you’ve ever played (video game or real game): The first Silent Hill, probably. It took a lot of reading to get it. Do you know anyone who has been struck by lightning before? No. Which cartoon character would you want to keep as a pet? Does Stitch count? Or a Pokemon. Do you like marshmallows? Yes. What is your favorite flavor of candy cane? I really like the Jolly Rancher candy canes, I think they are? Have you ever fostered an animal? No. Do you still take hot showers when it’s hot out? Not as hot, but not cold except on very extreme occasions. When writing $ sign, do you draw one line through the S or two? Two. What animal have you always wanted as a pet but couldn’t have? I'm thankful that my parents were pretty open-minded to what pets I really wanted, but one I was never allowed to have was a ferret because of how messy and smelly they are. List three people you’ve had crushes on: Jason, Sara, and Sebastian were probably my biggest crushes. Have you ever thrown up from cramps? No, but god have I felt close. List three people you had a hard time forgiving. Jason, Colleen, and my dad. Who is the most spiritual person you know? Probably my sister's mother-in-law. Would you ever start a vlog? God no, I'd bore people to tears. Are your dreams coming true yet? I mean, I guess in some ways with my mental health. In my deepest depression, what I have now was a dream, even though current me is very discontent with it. Most of my dreams, though? No. Do you struggle with depression? I've been diagnosed with severe depression since 7th grade. Are you haunted by your past? A few things won't leave me alone. What medical conditions do you have? Just a lot. There are even more that are up for debate. I've talked about my diagnosed conditions enough. Do you use a Magic Bullet? No. What does your apron look like? I don’t have one. What are your favorite spicy foods? Hot Cheetos, Takis, hot wings, jalapeno pizza... Man, I love spicy food. Which do you like better: being an adult or being a kid? Being a kid. Were you excited to be a teenager on your thirteenth birthday? I had very mixed feelings. Did you feel insecure in high school? Shit, I still do. Would you ever be friends with someone who was suicidal? What the FUCK is this question? No fucking shit I would be. Someone being suicidal in no way affects who they are as a person. Who was the biggest bully in high school? I don't think there really was one. What was your favorite class in high school? Art. Would you rather have a daughter or a son? If I wanted kids, a daughter. Have you ever written to an advice columnist? No. Have you ever had a doctor not believe what you told him? Maybe? I did however have an employee at the ER the first time I went try to pry out of me that my self-mutilation was for attention, and it wasn't until I insisted about a dozen times that it wasn't that he believed me. It's odd looking back that I got REALLY attached to him during that stay, knowing now that it was absolutely horrible and extremely unhelpful for him to do that. If you’re female, would you feel uncomfortable having a male gynecologist? I would absolutely refuse to have a male one. Do you like Lisa Frank? Yeah, like can you talk about aesthetic. What gives you nightmares? Boy, I wish I could tell you, given how much I have them. Were you ever hospitalized as a child? No. Did you get senior pictures taken? No. What color is your bicycle? I don’t have one. Did you ever have to take home a fake baby in health class? No, thank fuck. Would you rather wear ivory or white on your wedding day? What color will your bridesmaids wear? I'd rather wear black. I think red will be the bridesmaids' color. Would you rather have a swimming pool or trampoline? I want a swimming pool so damn badly so I could exercise my legs without worrying about sweating, and I can stop and rest whenever I want, unlike going walking or something. I don't think my knees could handle a trampoline. Do you think babies are cute? Some, sure. But a lot, not really. Do you dream about the future a lot? Yeah. Do you think about your past a lot? Way too frequently. How good are you at living in the moment? I'm trying to get better at it. Have you ever questioned God’s existence? Yeah. Vanilla frosting or chocolate? Chocolate. What’s your favorite foreign cuisine? I've actually been exploring Italian pasta lately. I'm not a big fan of foreign food that I've tried, though. Have you ever moved to another state? No. Did you do anything productive today? No. .-. Can you say the alphabet backwards? No, actually. Do you like flowers? Of course; does anyone not? Have you ever thought you were gonna die? I didn't care if I did or didn't. What kind of mood are you in today? I was honestly really depressed through most of it. Just health stuff was really getting to me. I just woke up from what was honestly like a four-hour nap and I feel all right, I guess. What are you craving right now? I REALLY want Domino's jalapeno pizza. Is there anyone you would seriously punch right now if you had the chance? No. What is worse, physical or emotional pain? Definitely emotional. Have you ever walked in on somebody doing something… questionable? When Dad still lived with us, I think he might have been watching... you know... on TV when I came into my parents' room for something. Idk for sure though. I didn't ask, and I don't want to know. If you were to make videos on YouTube, what would they be of? Oh god, idk. I don't want to make any. What I'd have most fun with would be reptile education, but I 1.) have literally one snake, 2.) am not extremely educated on a good number of them and don't want to be misleading, and 3.) I would run outta content fast. So, leave it to Snake Discovery, haha. Posting pictures of yourself in a bathing suit on the internet - ok or not? Yes, it's okay????? If you're talking about me personally though, you won't see me dead in a bathing suit picture. Do you typically laugh when somebody falls down? No, I gasp and see if they're okay. What is the most disturbing movie you’ve ever watched? Paranormal Entity. The ending is... a lot. Your opinion of Katy Perry, please? I like a couple of her songs. If you could say anything to your Mom right now… what would it be? "Thank you for absolutely everything."

[did-he-just-hiss-at-me]

Hi its me again - got any soft logan headcannons you wouldn't mind sharing? -🧃(Applejuice Anon)

hello again!!! =D you asked for soft, so soft is what u will get! disclaimer, if u end up in a sugar coma from how sweet this is don't say i didn't warn u

this man unironically enjoys vocaloid. he enjoys a wide variety of voices but since i like to project, i'll say his favorite is gumi! if you're very lucky you can hear him softly singing/humming the tune of some of his favorite vocaloid songs

logan still owns a unicorn plushie that he got when he was 8. at the age of 8 the unicorn plush was as big as himself. it's got galaxy print fur, baby blue accents, shiny silver stars in certain places and super sparkly eyes. he keeps it in his closet bc he doesn't have the right place for it but every now and then he'll pull the plush out and cuddle it for nostalgia.

yes he has glow in the dark stars on his ceiling, and yes they're accurate to how the night sky would appear to thomas irl, no you can't change my mind. they can also change color, v v soft glow

multicolor fairy lights? heck yeah babey!!!! he has his glow in the dark stars match whatever color he has the lights set for atm. he may claim to be all seriousness but this dude has to have some color in his life to brighten his day

thomas's best report cards are framed on logan's wall bc he's so proud, fam!!!!

the sides have movie nights and whenever they can pull logan away from his work for movie nights, he ends up in between all of them for cuddles. but it's not like they trapped him, no no, he trapped them with cuddles. i stan a nerd who snuggles like a koala

on his days off he wears big oversized sweaters, takes off his glasses, snuggles up in a pile of pillows in bed, eats some snacks and either plays video games or watches documentaries. if he feels like it he'll accept any side's request to join him in his day-off activities.

to add on to the video game part of the last one, i adore the thought of logan playing peaceful, wholesome, soothing video games like animal crossing, stardew valley, slime rancher, etc. gamer logan, heck ye

logan and roman discuss poetry together and lo helps ro with his rap skills. they genuinely have fun together doing this and logan shows pride when roman shows progress =3

logan does science experiments with remus bc it helps keep remus distracted when he can't help but give thomas a hard time, and bc logan enjoys doing these experiments and being a teacher =3

speaking of teaching... animaniacs is a pretty hot topic rn bc of the reboot so... logan, but: 1. when he was younger he sang the educational songs that yakko sung in the series as a way to teach the young!sides, and 2. he does the rap that yakko did in the reboot(which was freaking sick btw, i love the reboot yakko y'all)

logan and virgil have chill sleepovers on nights when virgil's anxiety is v high

anyway i'm running out of ideas for right now so that's all for now folks lmao. ty for sending the ask =3 💕

[jesglonthejester]

Today, I bring y'all Slime-dimore

He be cranky and fuzzing because he's trying to be intimidating but it's hard to take him seriously when he's so squishable and smoll.

Fred and Joey be having a hard time keeping a straight face around him when he's like that, he good cranky slime son.

Slime-Dimore

Player - Frederick

Principal of the Far Far Range Thing - Joey Miles

I'm just in a Slime Rancher mood, so I wanna make all sorts of cute slimes or Slime-dimore content (at least for now until my brain decides to do something else, lol)

Art of the Day~🐾🎶✨📏

(Edit: My brain tends to pup up 50+ different names for one character after I've already named them but I'm just gonna leave it as Joey cause he looks like a Joey, sorry)

[anxmalxnstincts-archived-blog]

Hello  Please hit the ‘read more’ for more information on why a ‘Western Verse’ is something you should add to your list.  (Can you tell I really want some threads in this verse?  I mean... I’m practically throwing myself at you all.)

Do you want to see your character as a gunslinger, bandit, outlaw, Sherriff, Marshal, ranger, cowpoke, rancher, or otherwise?  Do you want grand adventures and shootouts and prison escapes and drunken saloon brawls?  DO YOU WANT SOME OF THE GRANDEST REVENGE STORIES OF ALL TIME?!  That’s what westerns are all about! 

Marshals are mostly corrupt, federal law enforcement.  They did much of the murdering and otherwise of innocent homesteaders.  They took money from corrupt politicians or businessmen who had large stakes in the land of Native Americans or the railroad or the Civil War.  They would torment and torture people until they fled from their homes.  They killed people’s families.  They would string up innocent men, women, and children if it meant money in their pockets.  THESE MEN ARE THE REASON MOST OUTLAWS BECAME OUTLAWS.

Rangers were less corruptible.  They were the state law enforcement.  Most of these men wanted justice, though some would take a bribe.  They were more trustworthy than the Marshals and they were more likely to do their actual job rather than plunder and murder those they swore to protect.

Sheriffs were the law enforcement for the towns.  They could be just as bad as any Marshal, but just on a smaller scale.  They might be in the pocket of a politician, a businessman, a Marshal, or even a well-known gang if they have the coin.  There were plenty of Sheriffs who were upstanding men of the law... those who believed in justice and due process... and there were many who didn’t.

Brothels were usually found inside saloons, though the business was separate from the business of the bar itself.  They heard all the whispers.  They were the ones who could get information out of drunken fools.  And some of these women were also very dangerous.  Not just damsels.  Oh no.  These women know how to defend themselves.  They have to.  And many of them are working girls... girls who send their money home to their families who are generally down on their luck homesteaders.  And most of them want out of the business as soon as they can.

Outlaws are men AND women who are fugitives of the law.  They’ll have bounties on their heads.  They’re the ones that were framed for murders or robberies... or maybe they did commit these crimes... but for a sense of justice and purpose.  They do it to make sure the debt they believe they are owed is repaid.  Maybe they’re hunting down the Marshals because they killed their family.  Maybe they’re trying to help protect Native American land by killing anyone who tries to steal or develop it.  Whatever their reasoning for doing what they do, the law wants them, alive or dead, usually for a reward.

Bandits were those assholes who robbed you just to rob you.  They wanted money and gold and treasure.  They murdered and did other unspeakable things to innocent travelers and townsfolk and homesteaders.  They came tearing into towns to rob banks and to take advantage of the fear that townsfolk felt towards them.  They usually would hole up in an outpost or a small town or they ambushed travelers in canyons.

Native Americans were the men and women who always had the VERY short end of the stick.  Even if we had treaties with them, we usually broke them.  We stole their land and pushed them out.  We killed them and framed them for the crimes of others.  Not everyone hated or feared the Native Americans of course.  Some folk had respect for these great peoples and their cultures.  They deserved so much better than what we did to them.  Some of the most notable chiefs of the time were Geronimo (Apache), Sitting Bull (Hunkpapa Lakota Sioux), Crazy Horse (Oglala Lakota), Chief Joseph (Nez Perce), and Red Cloud (Oglala Lakota) just to name a few.

Easterners were not well liked in the west.  Most of these people had money or were business people looking to buy up land and use it for mining or otherwise.  They displaced families and native tribes.  And some of them did it all with a bit of coin and some hired guns.  Others were people looking to start a new life.  They heard about the opportunities the land here provided.  But all they ever found was dust.

And those are just a few of the types of people you might find in the wild, wild west.  Others of note would be ranchers, farmers, gunslingers, saloon owners, bounty hunters, treasure hunters, businessmen, miners, couriers, Union and Confederate soldiers, and peddlers of dangerous and addictive elixirs.

YOU-

LYIN’-

IF YOU SAY-

YOU DON’T WANT-

TO BE A PART OF THIS.

Nah... I’m just kiddin’.  But seriously... Y'all could have some fun with this shit.  I’d love to see more western plots being thrown around and used.  The West was once a dangerous land and a hard life to live (sometimes, it still is).  This kind of verse has the potential to bring you plots that you wouldn’t be able to otherwise explore.  Just give it some thought and then come love on me!!!!

[meximatic]

I'm fucking TIRED of being neutral.

Just want to make this clear Crap...y'all made me... I'm not a republican. I literally grew up in a town where everyone was. Some because of the political, and some because of theological beliefs. Here's the thing. I actually agree with some right wing beliefs. That's what makes democracy great. You do not have to agree with everything your chosen party adheres to. You can choose what you like. This was something I learned in the past few years I remember being involved in a youth worship team when I was young. A mother of the team bought us all tickets to see George W Bush speak. She gave me a ticket and said "it's important for people to see that republicans aren't just old white people." Seriously, after hearing her words I looked at her, knowing full well I was dating her daughter, and said " I'm not a republican." She said " You're a Christian, right?" That angered me Adam, at 19, looked at her and said "I don't think God is concerned with who I vote for, as long as he sees what's in my heart and what I truly mean." Needless to say, she didn't like it. So now, About ten years later. I see, honestly, a buffoon representing not only the Republican Party, who are way more intelligent than their chosen representative, but a man who has been recorded and documented as saying MY people are child molesters and rapists . He openly advocates racially categorizing minorities and...lest we forget, grabbing women by the PUSSY!!!!! To my republican friends. You have to see that we aren't angry that you won this election. We are just angry that it's HIM! You cannot look at Donald Trump and honestly tell us you're proud of your choice! There are so Many more capable, more experienced choices...and HE won. Regardless We are stuck with a egotistical socialpath for a president for the next four years. Politics aside, I dare you to argue that point as being false. I hope the more experienced people in his party and cabinet guide him. They are smart and don't call people a "pussy" on twitter like our new POTUS did on twitter towards John Stewart...while he was running for leader of the free world...two months ago. Please. Impeach. Revolt. Find a better representative for your cause, my right wing friends. I tell you now, he will do your party nothing but shame. You are better than that. YOU DESERVE SO MUCH BETTER. The ranchers and loggers I grew up with are better than him. The Scott Valley kids and dairy workers are better than HIM!!! He doesn't represent you! He's never had to struggle when work was scarce. He's never had to cut cords of wood to feed his family!! He doesn't know hard work! Please, just know, my right wing friends. You are worth more than him. In nothing but love for my brethren, Adam James Martinez

[bokettochild]

Violet

So y'all remember this animatic? Yeah?

I wrote a thing based off of it.

I'm not entirely sure how I fee about it, but y'all have shown how much you like my crack in the past, even if I wasn't sure about that either, so...

Here's Legend getting mistaken for a mom and pulling his brothers into a terrible impromptu acting adventure.

There are many things you do not do in Castletown.

One of those things, apparently, was taking Twilight with you, and next time he had a chance Legend was seriously considering muzzling their wolfish friend, in his shadow form or not.

He wasn’t the only one with that thought either apparently, although likely the only one who was thinking it out annoyance rather than utter and complete terror. Honestly, Twi needed to cut that protective streak of his in half, or he was going to be regretting it even more than he was going to regret this!

They’d all met thieves before, on the road, in villages, even here in Castle Town, and unfortunately Warriors’ central city was particularly full of them. The captain had explained it ages ago, something about the war displacing people and stirring up unrest with the refugees. It wasn't uncommon that someone got tired of relying on the crown for help, which, the captain had admitted sorrowfully, was rather slow in coming, despite all of Artemis’s efforts, to provide any sort of relief to the starving and displaced victims of the war. Legend had winced at that. Poor blokes, it had been similar in his own Hyrule when those trapped in the dark world emerged again, and even back in their Hylian forms, many of them had struggled to readjust to a world that had moved on in their absence.

It was little wonder than that those in the captain’s time faced the same struggle, especially after a bloody time war, but even so, it bothered him to no end that their group specifically had been the one that the idiot of a man chose to target. Honestly! They were all carrying swords for pities sakes! How did the sod even think he was going to catch a bunch of warriors unawares to steal from them?

Maybe it was because they were split.

It only made sense, after being dropped in the captain’s time, that they restock supplies. Both for practicality and to avoid suspicion, they’d divided the group into two to better run their errands, Time taking those less accustomed to bustling cities with him to gather food and potions, and Warriors leading the rest of them, those who could stand crowds at least a little bit better, to visit the blacksmith, fletcher, and tailor shops.

True to form, the captain strutted ahead with his scarf waving behind him, Wind tagging along beside him and chattering excitedly about something or other at the soldier. He and Four, however, had chosen to trail after, not for any particular reason other than both being extremely tired and maybe just a bit emotional.

In his own case, he hadn’t slept in a good sixty-three hours or so, and combining that with the stress of wandering around in an unknown place, he was a little more sensitive than usual and a bit put out as a result. Similarly, Four was fighting off his usual headache from their sudden switch, and ever since they’d pulled themselves out of the alleyway Hylia dumped them in, the shortest hero had worn his hood pulled over his eyes, mumbling softly under his breath in a way that was, unfortunately, unnerving Legend further and making him want, very much, to beg the other to stop.

That wasn’t an option of course, so he did something he hated almost as much as the saunter Warriors was using to get down the road.

He made small talk.

It helped, surprisingly, and while the four of them had run their errands, he chattered amiably with the smithy, who’d been willing to talk as long as he didn’t have to think too much on things. Legend could agree with that, and the two had spent the last half hour discussing if Four’s tunic really was red, green, blue and violet, as the smithy claimed, or red, green, blue and purple as Legend thought it was.

“It’s violet.” Four huffed, pushing the last bundle of arrows into his pack as they departed from the smithy’s shop and made their way back to the fountain at the center of town, where they'd agreed to meet with Time and the others.

“But it’s not!” He insisted, shifting the bundle of fabric in his arms and meeting the smithy’s gaze. “Violet is softer, duskier, a bit closer to grey or blue. That’s purple, plain as day!”

Warriors and Wind, for once, didn’t say anything, only exchanging grins every so often that the other two ignored.

Talking with Four was surprisingly pleasant, and ridiculously easy in comparison to talking with the others. For one thing, neither had to look too very far up or down to see the other, and as they’d found since their first dinner at the ranch, it was easy to say a lot with just a look. Subtle communication also went a long way further with the smithy than with anyone else, and it was a relief not to have to explain everything for once. Additionally, Four also liked reading, and unlike with most of their other brothers, they could actually have intelligent conversations with each other.

Not that that’s what they were doing when they’d trailed after the other two towards the fountain, but when they heard the snarl and resulting scream, the look the two heroes shared had carried as many words as a full two-hour lecture, while all at once conveying a single thought.

Oh boy, what did Twilight do this time?

What Twilight had done, he found out later, was spring a thief who had attempted to snatch the Sheikah Slate from Wild, who’d been a bit busy trying to calm his anxiety to really notice that one of the humans pressing close all around him was actually trying to steal it. That, naturally, was all well and good. The problem was the way Twilight had chosen to handle it and Legend swore there were days that Twilight forgot what form he was in; rather than pushing the thief away or grabbing ahold of them and confronting them, the gracious rancher had chosen to fling his entire body weight at the man and bite his arm.

Of course, that was only what Legend found out later, what he saw when the four of them managed to peek through the crowd, was Twilight standing there in full sight of the entire market with blood on his teeth and a man screaming in pain and terror at his feet.

Bravo, Rancher, bravo.

“Oof.” Wind winced. “That’s not good.”

“Shit.” Warriors swore, glancing around nervously and ripping his scarf off to hide in his pack.

Realization sprung on the vet like Twilight had the poor thief; Warriors was the hero here. If anyone noticed him, or any of the knightlier looking ones, they’d probably try and have them arrest Twilight. That was all well and good of course, as it would make a reasonable excuse to haul the rancher out of the way, but they’d be expected to call for help from some soldiers, and while they’d been planning on meeting with the queen while they were here, having Twilight presented to her as a feral, potentially insane, and definitely dangerous criminal was not the approach they were aiming for.

They needed a distraction, fast.

So, like the reasonable and totally mentally secure Hylian that he was, Legend shouted the first thing that came to his mind. “Violet!”

His three companions stared at him, and had he been capable, he would have stared at himself, but a desperate glance Fours way had the other drawing back, nodding slowly as Legend shouted again. “Violet? Honey?”

Warriors looked at him like he’d lost his head, gripping Wind’s shoulder firmly as if worried he’d have to pull the kid back from the apparently mad veteran.

Thank Din for teaching him acting years ago, even if it was all stage performing, but he was counting on it to get him, and Twilight, out of their respective messes, even if that meant building his higher before he could escape. At any rate, he’d caught the attention of a few people with his panicked shout. Turning to the nearest Hylian that wasn’t one of his group, he gently tapped the woman’s shoulder, letting his panic and everything in general spill over into his face and voice as the woman met his gaze with a startled look.

“Ma’am, I’m looking for-” Oh Four was going to hate this. “-My child, Violet. Have you seen a blonde Hylian child, so tall?” He lowered his hand to approximately where Four’s head would reach. “I’ve been looking everywhere!” He forced a fake sob into his voice, glancing from the woman to the surrounding crowd, and Warriors and Wind in its midst.

Wind was stifling a laugh behind his hand while Warriors stared in utter shock.

“Oh my,” The woman touched her cheek, clucking lightly and patting Legend’s hand in a consoling manner. “You poor dear! I haven’t seen a thing but just give me one moment.” The burly housewife turned, still patting Legend’s hand gently as she murmured something to the women behind her, before turning back to Legend with a sorry expression. “None of my friends have seen your little one, dear. But-” The woman turned and, with all the force and volume of a cow, hollered at the top of her lungs to the crowd as a whole. “Hello? Yes, this woman is looking for her daughter!”

Woman?!?!?!

“Her name is Violet! She’s-” The woman blinked, looking to Legend with a worried look as several other market goers turned to stare, many of them women with looks of pity and understanding that was making him wish he’d stayed silent. Fortunately, his ruse had startled them out of staring at the sight of a mauled thief as worry for a poor young mother and her lost daughter took its place. “She’s how old?”

Legend fought the protest of female pronouns, both on Four’s part and his own, but only in his head. Outwardly however, he covered his face with the hand not being smashed by the farm-wife's own. “She’s four.” Shoot him, he was saying whatever came to mind because he was panicked, alright?

A snort could be heard behind him, earning disapproving looks from the crowd that soon shifted to pity as Wind too joined the act, turning his snort into pitiful sniffling as he clung to Warriors’ hand, looking for all the world like a child who’d been to the market too long and wanted to go home, but was also panicking at the loss of their sibling. “Have you all seen my sister?” The sailor blubbered softly, actual tears spilling down his face as he pouted, expression making his act so believable that no one even questioned his height. As if to make the act more convincing, Warriors wrapped an arm around the kid’s shoulder, his own face stiffening into something that could either be gas or worry, Legend was a bit on the fence.

“What’s going on here?” Legend wished that was Time stalking towards them in full armor, but it wasn’t, it was a Hylian Soldier, staring at the crowd with a grim frown on his face as he turned to Legend, standing in its center.

Oh well, those who crack under a tough audience get tomatoes to the face; he just hoped Wars would keep playing along. “My daughter,” He sobbed into his hand, pulling the other free from the housewife to properly cover his face. “She- My baby- I can’t find her anywhere, Sir!” Later, Warriors would begrudgingly admit that the look Legend shot the soldier was enough to break any heart as the vet stepped forwards, grabbing hold of the man’s arm with all the desperation of a worried mother. “Please tell me, have you seen a little girl? She’s in her favorite dress, the colors of the goddesses, red, green and blue?” He motioned down at his own tunic, skirt, whatever one would call it. “There’s a violet corner too, I made it for her myself- oh my poor baby! I can’t seem to find her anywhere!”

The grizzled soldier quickly melted under the power of tearful violet eyes, and he too gently patted Legend’s hands as if he thought it would do any good. “I’ll have my men look for her right away, ma’am. How old would you say she is?

“She’s four.” He reaffirmed. Might as well stick to his original story.

“So tall?” The farm-wife motioned, hands lowering a bit more than Legend’s had, but the woman was trying to help, so he couldn’t really be upset with her for getting it wrong. At this point though, he was a bit worried about where Four actually was, because he’d expected the shorter hero to make an appearance sooner rather than later so the act could end.

“Right.” The man nodded, pulling himself loose as Legend brought his hands to clasp in front of his chest in an imitation of the maids he’d seen worrying about the halls when Fable went missing. “We’ll do everything in our power to find your little one, madame, you have my word.” The soldier bowed, kissing the back of the vet’s hand graciously before moving back into the crowd and snapping orders at the soldiers stationed around the market.

People buzzed by, spreading the word of ‘little Violet’s’ disappearance as Warriors and Wind pushed forwards to where Legend stood.

“Really, vet?” Warriors murmured lowly.

“I panicked.” He admitted softly, as to avoid anyone noticing as he wrung his hands. “But seriously, where is ‘’Violet’? I thought he’d have appeared before it became a big thing.”

The captain frowned, settling a hand on his shoulder carefully and standing on his toes to look over the crowd as Wind giggled at the scowling veteran. The minute he shot a look down at the sailor though, the kid had picked up his role as smoothly as if he’d never dropped it. “I’m worried, mom.” Wind blinked past fake tears, and had he not needed to remain in character, Legend would have scowled and flicked the kid’s nose for the tease.

“I am too, honey.” He sighed instead, ruffling the sailor’s curls and looking over to where the others had been. Time and the others had disappeared into the crowd again, likely trying to keep a low profile and laughing their asses off at Legend’s expense while Time and Sky scolded Twilight.

“Mama?” A small voice called out, and the crowd, and he meant the whole crowd, the whole freaking crowd of several hundred people, froze as a small face peeked out from an alleyway, the smithy’s hand coming up to rub at his shimmering purple eyes with a sniff. “Mama?”

“Violet!” All three heroes surged forwards, Legend sinking to his knees and wrapping Four in a hug, taking the opportunity when his face was hidden from the crowd to scowl. “About time you showed up.” Aloud for the crowd however, he let sobs pitch his voice hysterically. “Oh honey, you can’t run off on mama like that! I was worried sick!”

And as if to put the icing on the cake of shame, one of the men in the crowd smiled softly, patting Warriors’ back with a friendly smile. “Your wife is quite the caring mother, isn’t she? Ah, you’re a lucky man, Mr.”

Legend forced himself to not blow their cover, no matter how little they now needed it with the others safely out of sight. Breaking character meant causing drama that they didn’t need. ‘Violet’ had been found, the cute little family would depart, people would calm. But if the worried mother turned out to be a screaming teenage boy and the lost daughter to be a smithy apprentice with a height problem, people would likely riot. So instead of turning around and giving the man a piece of his mind, he pushed forwards, hefting Four in his arms (the smithy sank into him with a sigh that couldn’t have been faked) letting the smaller hero nestle against him, hood hiding the smithy’s face from view as he pulled them both up, adjusting his arms so as to not drop the other.

Man, he was glad he’d put on power bracelets today.

“She is indeed.” Warriors forced out, a strained smile on his face as he settled his hand on Legend’s waist, stiff, cold and incredibly awkward. “We’d probably better head off, dear.” If the captain smiled any harder, he’d break his teeth. “Or the inns will all be full.”

It should have ended there, it should have. Legend was so ready for it to end (although Four was warm and a calming presence as the smithy began to doze against his chest), but because fate loved to mess with him, it didn’t.

“You’re looking for a place to stay the night?” The Man-Who-Needed-To-Be-Kicked cocked a brow. “I run an inn here, just across the square. I’m sure we can find a lovely little family like yourselves a place to rest, you and our wife must be exhausted after such worry!”

Warriors, sages curse and bless him, nodded along stiffly, gently pulling him along by is waist after the Blasted-Innkeeper-Who-Would-Be-Kicked as the man chattered about family discounts and free dinner. Legend’s shoulders only lowered when a free trip to the bath house was also thrown in ‘complimentarily’.

He regretted it when someone pointed him to the ladies’ side of the bath-house (think heavens it was empty that early), and he was about ready to strangle something or someone when the others joined them inside, stuck with a regularly priced room, and the smithy and vet both were bombarded with teases as Warriors sat looking utterly and completely disgusted.

“They thought we were married....”

Legend groaned, flopping over on the other side of the bed with a grimace. “Gross, right?”

“Yeah.”

"We’re forgetting this ever happened, right?”

“Yeah.”

“Good.”

Regardless, no one ever let them forget it happened.

Legend was buying Twilight a muzzle, and he was pretty sure Wars would be willing to help.