#Roger is just out there living it

[wombywoo]

retired 🩶

[ef-1]

to the holes in my butterfly wings

[kacievvbbbb]

Some Goth Fam Modern AU headcanons I can't stop thinking about and will probably explode if I don't put pen to paper or in this case- Type to screen

Here we go. This is going to be a long one;

-Shanks isnt officially part of the goth family. Even though he's know these kids since mihawk had them, helped raise them is always there in the morning to take them to school and is practically their other father. Perona and Zoro still refer to him as "Mihawk's bum of a boyfriend" (byprodcut of hearing mihawk call shanks a bum one to many times).

-Zoro and Perona relentlessly troll mihawk for having only 2 friends and they are his boyfriend and business partner. even though perona herself only has like 1 friend and a gaggle of minions.

-Perona got a giant bear cut out all the stuffing and used to make a baby zoro wear the carcass of her destuffed bear. baby zoro was very chill about all this.

-People think mihawk is a housewife but he actually has a job with the government that nobody really knows what it is and nobody is really allowed to talk about. he just never goes in except for the once a month meeting where they threaten to fire him.

-They have a groupchat just the three of them called "The Family" and then another one with shanks sinces hes the one that actually drives them places called "the family and shanks"

-Mihawk is the type of person to get a family portrait every time the kids have grown to look significantly different from the last so every couple of years. They are all extremely giant and actually painted. these are the only family picture hanging on the walls. even tho mihawk secretly scrapbooks all the pictures shanks takes.

-Mihawk has had them since they were toddlers they still call him Mihawk tho. excpet zoro hits 13 and starts exclusively referring to him as Hawkeyes or "that guy".

-Mihawk is a crunchy mom tm and they grew up in an ingredient household. But because mihawk is a grazer at heart and zoro needs fuel like a truck and all their little friends all practically live at their house. Theres awlays charcuterie boards on hand. Zoro never had a pop tart until he went to Luffy's house one time. He asked Mihawk what fruit snacks are and he reacted like zoro just summoned the devil into their home. He's very Nara smith I cook all my kids meals from scratch coded. He's definitely running one of those mommy blogs and being really bitchy and personal attacky about the whole thing and hes not even trying to hide it. Literally two steps away from bring a mommy influencer. literally just needs the instagram page (which he has but doesn't know its run by perona).

-Despite this zoro and perona cant cook for shit. That one tiktok video of the woman showing her husband what she used to have for a midnight snake as a kid in an ingredient house and it was just a bowl of mixed vegetables is so them coded. Despite mihawk's nara smith tendencies once thye get to a certain age every meal but dinner is every man for himself. mihawk only cooks once and so raises a family of girl lunch havers and grazers. Zoro thinks a greenshake is a snack. his eating habits are a source of constant stress for sanji.

-Perona is definitely an influencer her content ranges from fashion stuff to content about her strange family (she tries to get them to make tiktoks and msot of the videos are just zoro's resignantion and mihawk's funnily shutting that shit down with a swiftness) and just stories of her weird family and her brothers even weirder friends. nobody can figure out what their family dynamics are.

-shanks definelty makes those "dealing my italian husband psychic damage videos" except they are like my Spanish-Romanian husband and mihawk get genuinely upset and every video ends witrh the threat of shanks being murdered.

-Nobody on these channels realizes that this mihawk is the same internationally recognized as the best swordfighter to ever live Dracule Mihawk.

-Zoro goes to the local community college with most of the gang while perona goes to a fashion college as a fashion/fashion history major. she lives on campus but is home every weekend tho so mihawk can do her laundry and restock her fridge.

-Only luffy and nami who are his childhood friends truly know just how fucking rich his family is even tho Zoro and the parent that zoro and luffy both weirdly share, despite not being otherwise related, look and act like bums. They meet the rest of the straw hats in college.

-At no given time do shanks or zoro even have 20 dollars on them something that endlessly frustrates everyone else around them. Usopp has bought one to many meals for zoro to be nothing other than incensed when he is invited to "summer" at their lake house thats more like a resort. Zoro can live in a converted mid century castle but Usopp has seen him pay for a sandwhich with a collection of change.

-people often wonder where exactly perona got her bratty attitude from because zoro and mihawk are pretty chill, composed guys. and then they see how mihawk acts around Shanks and the lenghts of childishness Shanks can push him too and then they

-Zoro and Mihawk are endlessly competing at petty meaningless activities espoecially if they involve cutting things with a blade. they have a running count into the 300s off how much mihawk has won vs zoro and he is endlessly smug about it. Zoro has only just begun to start clawing more victories for himself. He recently won their speed cucumber cutting challenge and mihawk was non to pleased about this.

-Adopted this one from a mutual; but Mihawk used to take Perona to all the twighlight, pop girlie, pastel goth stuff and pretends that its all a hastle even tho he's really into the stuff and has been since perona got into it.

-They are the kind of family that always had dinner together but would have every other meal wherever and whenever but since perona is away at college it became sunday lunch and dinner which just turned into sunday bruch for practically the entire neighborhood because zoro and perona keep inviting their weird friends over. and now its a whole thing and mihawk is none to pleased.

-Mihawk was about to be an empty nester and then s-hawk falls in his lap and heres another kid he has to look after and makes sure survives till adulthood 🙄. S-hawk ironically for all he looks exactly like him is the child that acts the least like him (This is largely zoro's influence) And he's definetly that stereotype of when you parents decide to have a kid in their 40s and they grow up in a completely different household than you did. like who even are these people?? S-hawk actually gets to have fruit snacks and zoro is still super salty about this. Because Mihawk was just off achieving his biggest dream with nothing better to do that to pout all his energy into being a parent to these two monsters. but now he has actually has a job that he actively needs to work at🙄

-Zoro looks baby sits s-hawk the most and like s-hawk is like 5 to zoro's 20 and zoro is definitely one of those people that doesnt "play" with kids instead he just folds s-hawk into whatever routine he has for the day without missing a step. He takes him with him to his classes at the community college. He pulls up a chair for s-hawk he has his own little notebook and everything everytime people try to coo at him Zoro tells them to leave him a lone the little dude's trying to learn here. He takes him to the gym like all those videos with dads and their babies repping sets. He gives s-hawk baby dumbells and teaches him proper form and everything. just goes about his life like there isnt a 5 year old trailing him like a duckling. Zoro puts on act for mihawk but he loves having a little buddy since chopper's kind of outgrown it.

-Zoro and Mihawk both talk to baby s-hawk like a regular person. Mihawk talks to him likes he's a distinguished gentleman with thoughts and opinions and who should know better than to fling food and toys and he often reads him the news. Zoro talks to him like he's just a dude definetly the type to have a beer with the baby while they sit on the couch watching sports. Perona and Shanks are the ones that actually treat him like a baby and baby talk him and shanks is definietly one of those parents that's always doing extreme sports stuff with a baby while Perona essentially treats him like a teddy bear / dress up doll. she and mihawk are the only ones allowed to make clothing decisons for him after the time he came home from a shopping trip with zoro and shanks looking like both a bum and a middle aged dad on vacation. Shanks was allowed to keep one tiny s-hawk sized haiwain shirt.

-Zoro essentially raises s-hawk like he's his child 😭. Like Junior and devante from Black-ish but he's less upront about this. He keeps adding things to the kid's schedule without telling Mihawk and essentially treats mihawk like the unwanted third in their relationship. He takes him everywhere with him. People would think that was his kid if he didn't look so intensely like mihawk. He signs baby hawk up for kendo classes from the age like 3 cause he'll be damned if he takes after mihawk's swordsmanship. He attends every practice he gets very intense during matches. its a whole thing. He also keeps signing baby hawk up for random extracurriclars that Mihawk can't keep up with and change depending on season. Baby hawk is in baby gymnastics with all the other seraphim. Zoro is very invested in this. Zoro the type to pull up to a heist with a baby.

[not-the-coffee-machine4]

Me: *tries to see what the Queen fans on TikTok have to say*

*Jim hate*

*”facts” that may or not be actually true*

*”Freddie Mercury was bisexual-“*

*Using Barbara Valentin as evidence*

*thinking things that happened in the movie actually happened irl*

*general misinformation about everyone and everything*

Me: aaaaand back to Tumblr I go

(open tags at your own risk, there’s a whole essay in there)

[widowshill]

— But it's almost midnight. — Oh, that's the point! At the stroke of twelve, he turns into Dracula. C'mon, Vicki – he won't bite.

pose ref.

[starker-sorbet]

Peter was intrigued by the witch who lived in his swamp. He was obviously powerful and well trained if the spells Peter had seen cast were any indication. As well as being respectful to the swamp itself, never harvesting more than he needed for his potions and avoiding aggravating the creatures who also inhabited the area. Not to mention he's incredibly good looking. All of this made the man a promising prospect for a mate. Now how to tell the man of his intentions to court him? Humans were notoriously tricky to deal with so that left Peter mulling over his options. Maybe the head of that annoying blonde knight that kept harassing him would best show Peter's intentions.

[cervinae-canine]

This isn't completely related to selfshipping but i unironically love making up shipnames for my s/i and the tf2 characters.

[also to note: some of these are not canon; pyro and scout are friends; and saxton hale is just kinda there. idk he's alright.]

Engineer x Morale: Radio Repair

Soldier x Morale: Roger That

Spy x Morale: Esprit de corps, Radio Drama

Medic x Morale: Herzschlag / Heartbeat

Demoman x Morale: Boombox

Sniper x Morale: Radio Silence, National Outback

Heavy x Morale: Tea and Jam

Scout x Morale: Skip Distance

Pyro x Morale: Smoke Signals

Miss Pauling x Morale: Two-way Radio

Saxton Hale x Morale: Mating Calls [this one is just dumb ignore]

Proships DNI

[thenamesblurrito]

Buzzard and Blurr are so cute :) really endearing ans sorta sweet, hope things work out well with em

Im really curious about the twos relationship. Do you have any thoughts you could share behind their dynamic and how they end up getting together? Or headcanons?

Keep up the good work! :D

THANK YOU ANON YOU MADE MY DAY!!!

i will be honest i would also like to know how they get together bc they are uhhhhhh both bad at this whole romantic thing! like i talk about here, they're both bumbling, inexperienced, and having a rude awakening to the concept of demisexuality, so as far as i can tell there is no end in sight to the mutual pining idiots. there's some possibilities but nothing concrete yet

they're a fun ship but first and foremost they are a funNY ship and the funny bits to me are in the pre-get together stage so that's what i think of the most. so! have some tidbits! this is a long post oops but i am NOT putting it under a cut i am making everyone LOOK AT SELF INDULGENCE RAAAGHH I AM KILLING CRINGE!!!

Blurr met Buzzard after being painstakingly transferred to a new, kitbashed frame and having a weird tall stranger show him the trash cube that used to be him with far too much enthusiasm. Buzzard was the one to fish that cube out of the trash as they went spelunking in Cybertron's waste disposal system as Team Purple were on planet to pull off a pet heist (and got more than they bargained for). once everyone realized the cube was a person and was ALIVE, they were also the one to uhhhhhh procure most of the pieces of his new frame, constructed by Knock-out in a back alley deal on Velocitron. Blurr is uncomfortable with how piecemeal and janky this frame is, despite being a close reconstruction of his original, and it takes him a long time to truly realize that Buzzard donated, bought, or outright stole 90% of the parts needed to bring him, a stranger, back to life. it's an odd feeling, to suddenly reckon with the concept that maybe there's more to this junker than picking pockets and being silly

it takes awhile for either of them to really pay attention to the other? like, Blurr has essentially pulled a Jesus, and also maybe unwillingly defected from the Autobots, and is currently "trapped" with a team full of criminals and Decepticons, one of whom was a spy that he spent so long tracking down and got thiiiiiiiis close to discovering her true identity before Longarm sent him off to Earth, so he's understandably got a grudge the size of a planet against Rosanna who is happy to taunt him about it, NOT TO MENTION the awkward, vulnerable, and painful physical therapy of getting used to this new frame and trying to regain his speed and just... being alive again?? sure, Buzzard is tall and weird, but they are the least of his worries in his early days with Team Purple

to be fair, like. for months the only real impression Blurr has of Buzzard is just:

infinite storage booba

that and "tall flightframe with purple parts but NOT a Decepticon???? not even an enemy????" it's something he's still coming to terms with. Gremlin consistently seeking him out to nap on is not helping

it may be easy to assume that Buzzard, having been brought to life by an Allspark shard on Earth, is young and ignorant and stupid and may not even know what love is etc etc. however, they were mentored by the whirlwind romance duo Rum-maj and Wreck-gar, both very invested and also very forthcoming about their own relationship. Buzzard is pretty knowledgeable about what love/romance/sexuality can look like, just from observing them and others around them! no, the mutual pining idiocy isn't from ignorance, it's just twitterpated stupidity 👍

this goes against popular fanon interpretation of Blurr i think, but i like to characterize him as the kind of hypercompetent-but-lame guy who's married to his work, doesn't bother with social skills beyond bare minimum, and isn't so much arrogant/full of himself as he is just impatient and dismissive. he's like a working breed dog. you might think he's hot but he would rather skip an offer of a one night stand in favor of following up on a potential lead or staking out a target's home all night. so Blurr's experience and general overall INTEREST in romance is nil

the fact i have slapped asexuality onto both of them just means they're both extra unprepared to Experience Feelings

it's slow! Buzzard thinks this guy is funny, and kind of sad, and though they never say this they think he could use a friend who won't get impatient with his own frustration. he knows a lot of stuff about Cybertron and Autobots and such that they've never heard before and he can be prompted to give entire lectures about anything, which they soak up, they love learning. Blurr is only mostly irritated by Buzzard being affable, and curious, and dropping odd knickknacks and riffraff into his hands whenever they feel like it. they don't roll their optics or look lost when he gets talking like many people do, and usually even manage to keep up with what he's saying. it's toleration at least!

he doesn't realize it, but it's really the least stressful/antagonistic connection he has with Team Purple so far. Rosanna was a target he was cheated out of uncovering and holds it over his head, Dreadringer is the mysterious captain of this dangerous gang who seems to want to toss everyone out the airlock, Wheelie was an old friend but seeing him so comfortable around these strangers is almost more offputting, Red Alert may be an Autobot but she's also the doctor seeing to his recovery which is hardly pleasant, the multiple Decepticons aboard keep him on edge even if they're nice to him like Voidwander, there's so many utterly absurdly strange people like Necro, or Wreck-gar, or Inferno, or Sky Lynx, or even Beachcomber, etc....

in comparison, Buzzard ends up filling almost a Kronk role to his Yzma as Blurr eventually feels comfortable ranting to them, or relaxing around them, or even skedaddling behind them for protection whenever Shenanigans occur. they're nice to him. it's weird. but it's still one of the biggest reasons why Blurr starts to acclimate to Team Purple, and even start considering himself one of them. without their positive influence, he wouldn't have dealt well with famous Team Purple tidbits like Tito Moto's funeral, Bludgeon deciding to start an official pirate rivalry, Dreadringer's delusions of interning with a god, Crescent's livestreaming career, or The Oil Slick Incident

Buzzard just thinks Blurr is fascinating to be around, in a much nicer way than when he was paranoid and scared of the rest of the team. now he's fitting in! in some corner of their mind, they think of him as another part of the hoard they call a family :3

maybe letting two obsession-prone people who only make friends with other weirdos spend a lot of time around one another was always going to end in a weird tangle of emotions, huh?

now this is of course Buzzard's Iconic Demi Moment, but Blurr has one too:

i firmly believe it's a hallmark- no, a REQUIREMENT that to be an Autobot in TFA you must be repressed. these guys are all touch-starved and alienated from their own wants and needs in favor of serving The Regime. so good luck Blurr you're gonna need it

Buzzard meanwhile is literally scared they're gonna pluck out Blurr's spleen. they keep wanting to be around him, and watch him, and touch him, all of which is normal sure but this is a lot so clearly their subconscious has marked him as a trinket to steal

attempts to explain otherwise generally do not go well

so they just. fail at communicating. they fail at communicating so bad the entire ship knows. even Rosanna gives Blurr tips on flirting. even Gremlin, Buzzard's dearest friend in the world, is giving them the stink-eye for idiocy. they are both still friends, they gravitate towards one another and get invested in what the other enjoys and work well together and just keep growing closer as time goes on, but the awkward, helpless stupidity of Oh My God Feelings turns it into a comedy show for the rest of Team Purple

maybe if Blurr could stop flipping out about the right thing to say and do and be and and and-- then he would relax enough, be confident enough to do something so bold as hold Buzzard's hand. maybe if Buzzard could stop worrying that their preoccupation with him is scary, or unwelcome, or unnatural, or going to upset his place in the team or as their friend, then they would stop feeling dread and start experiencing the joy and giddiness of romance, how it can be a treat for both of them

it's a lot of shenanigans. chicanery. silly falling over one another to just do something nice for the other but not quite knowing how. but they're both earnest. they enjoy one another. they keep coming back to one another

they'll get there eventually. i'll noodle something that fits

fingers crossed

i mean they have to get there eventually or this image won't be canon and i spent a lot of effort figuring out overlapping posing and kibble angles >:(

anyways. i'll leave u with this silly little ship meme (can u believe this image was gonna be my only response til i decided to defy cringe and infodump)

[happy-emmdings]

some captain swan honeymoon concepts…

1) wearing cute outfits

2) smooth sailing 💕

3) checking on Storybrooke on facetime a.k.a. what it looks like when Emma is handling the phone versus when Killian tries

4) being cute and romantic

BONUS: doing each other’s make up for an evening out✨ 

They got there🥺

[daytrippergilmour]

David Gilmour didn't have to put all his effort into singing "HA HA CHARADE YOU ARE" during the 1977 Pigs live performance but he did and that's why we love him

[stabbyfoxandrew]

every time my dad does anything he has to do it in the most annoying and loudest way possible. and honestly i'm not sure if he means to or he's just really goddamn stupid but it's really really grating. and i'm suffering the werewolf curse rn so i'm ready to die

[seashanties]

could he help the way he looked onto luffy, grinning proudly at the pirate? most certainly not. it had been so long since his " execution " and this ethereal being had kept an eye on the boy since he departed from foosha. shanks really outdid himself with this kid. he had yet to appear to luffy, the man simply wandering a spectator, invisible to the naked eye, yet he could tell others saw himself in this carefree boy. and truthfully? he couldn't disagree. the specter really wanted to pick this boys' brain.

if he wanted to approach luffy by himself, he'd just have to do it when he was alone. and maybe that'd why he settled himself upon an unused desk, arms folded across his chest. roger was likely to scare the poor boy to death, but the herald of the new era could hardly care at this point.

@sillygum / liked for a starter .

[im-still-a-robot]

I've given up on cringe and decided to talk endlessly about whatever the fuck I want at all hours of the day

[kacievvbbbb]

Look I like Roger enough, I understand what he represents and I generally don’t think he was a bad dude. I do however think he was shit at interpersonal relationships because, what the fuck. Whitebeards crew is infinitely more well adjusted and I’d say he arguably had the more traumatic death.

Like what even, what kind of planning leads a 53 year old man to sire a child knowing he is dying of an incurable illness and is about to turn himself in to be excuted by the marines where he will cause so much chaos it is literally still turning the world on its head 22 years later. He knew he was going to cause so much of a stir that he literally disbanded his crew and told them to spread far and wide to keep them safe. Because he knew the marines would hunt them far and wide But yet he still brought a baby into the world. Babe. What the fuck? What even is that? What was the thought process. I sincerely hope it was an accident and not a deliberate attempt to bring about a new era.

Because if so babe I need to see the recipe or I’m afraid we can never let you cook again

[mariocki]

Shadows of Fear: Did You Lock Up? (1.1, Thames, 1970)

"And they didn't make much mess?"

"No, not really. They forced that door. Smashed the cabinet, slashed a sofa. And kicked a hole in the bedroom door."

"Ah. Big mistake."

"What is?"

"Never lock inside doors. Anything you can to keep them out - but when they're in, let 'em get on with it."

"I'll remember."

[hauntingblue]

:)