#Rhys/Axton

[screaming-sparrow]

listen to me borderlands fandom, handsome jack is like 5'7.5 at most and i have proof!!!

[borderlandszine]

Excited to start on the adventure of a new project - The Border[line] It'll be a zine that celebrates all the characters from the borderlands franchise from Villains to NPCS and player characters. Keep an eye out on this page for the interest check that will be dropping this week!

This zine will be free!

[raven-cl]

They got married everyone, clap and cheer !!

[spoks-illogical-art]

i drafted this post on october 31 2019 lmao it has my very first tales au tim pic and just generally one of my first blands sketch dumps ^^

[bean-pole-art]

for this year's pride month I have decided to do icons of canon and my personal LGBTA headcanons for the blands characters. here are the bisexuals 💖💜💙

please be respectful towards my hcs. feel free to use these as ur icons! credit is appreciated but not needed

[rhysespuff]

🎄Merry Christmas to everyone💖🎄

I’m back again :D I Hape you all have nice holidays!

This picture was a Christmas gift for my dad. But I think it turned out well so I decided to share it with you guys!

How would you react if someone would give you this as Christmas present?

It’s my first time trying this kind of stuff. And I hope the quality don’t drop down. Hope you like it!

[draculas-secret-blog]

Pick my next fic

Hey! Decided I’d write some fics for the borderlands fanbase, figured I would let you guys choose what comes first! (They’ll have short little blurbs with more info under the cut if you want some!)

Rhysothy- I have a tftbl alternate au where news doesn’t get out that Jack is dead and that the Hyperion board has decided it would cause less issues for the company to bring in a body double. When Rhys gets the promotion he deserves and ends up working right under ‘jack’ he starts to notice that some things are different about the guy.. for one he’s absolute trash at programming and hey wait.. when did his eyes switch colors?

TLDR: Timothy is a shitty jack double

Gaigel- finding out that Angels mom was likely a Jakobs thanks to borderlands 3 i have cooked up a sweet au to go along with my living!angel one. They’ve been off planet for a tiny bit, Angel just needing to get as far away from pandora and euridium as humanly possible. They loop back for their annual check in with the crimson raiders and suprise! They get a wedding invite.. a little bit late and a little bit blood stained. Wait, huh? Why is it adressed ‘my dear niece Angel’? And why does the rsvp have the Jakobs gun manufacturer emblem?

TLDR: Gaige never asked her girlfriend her last name, whoopsie

Moxxi/Tannis- I think they should make out and that it would be totally cool and stuff.. just saying. Maybe it can even be a pre sequel fic as a treat with some canon divergence and a dash of ‘I have two kids and my crazy ex boyfriend and my family are trying to kill me. We should raise these kids together’

TLDR: Milf Moxxi and her Antisocial nerd girlfriend, yippie!

Mordibrick- Tina had her fake wedding, hammerlock and Jakobs had their real one.. Maybe it’s time that Mordecai and Brick get married too. I mean, they are dating, right? They established that clearly, right? They haven’t just been coparenting for years on accident while everyone just assumed they were gay. Totally not. And this wedding was totally not a surprise to them at all.. totally not.

TLDR: the game of gay chicken went too far in this one

Axton/Salvador: have not played their DLC yet, don’t kill me, BUT they give me old married energy when they call my echo. Like they’re trying to invite me over to have dinner with them or something. Anyways they flirt and narrate their shitty little death race and then light stuff on fire and flirt some more. Maybe claptrap gets bullied a little (a lot), we’ll see what happens. maybe a surprise Gaige cameo

TLDR: those two old guys kiss, the end.

Axton/Zed: this is the most original thought I think I have ever had personally. This au is inspired by two things: 1, my loyalty and parasocial friendship I had with Zed during my Gaige playthrough and 2, that one au here on tumblr of Axton being Gaiges adopted dad. I think Gaige trying to set Axton and Zed up together and Zed using his medical malpractice and four braincells to flirt would be great

TLDR: someone kiss that dilf with the silly little gun robot!

[ryzselo]

Random AUs sketch dump

[legendaryskeletonpicklewolf]

THIS IS LITERALLY HANDSOME JACKS SONG

Already in the start 0:51 it starts to sound like pre-sequel jack or "john" and it says "if he said help me kill the president" who is the president of hyperion at that time? HAROLD TASSITER WHO HE HATED AND KILLED.

Then 1:05-1:56 it sound like borderlands 2 cause he got older and it sounds like it was from the vault hunters prospective too especially when they said "he tells me to be cautious" he was warning the vault hunters of getting hurt especially after they killed angel.

AND THEN 1:59-2:47 it sounds like it takes place in tftbl now but in rhys's perspective describing jack ESPECIALLY when said "when he talks I hear his ghost" sounding like ai jack who basically no one could see or hear except rhys ALSO he went through stuff like a ghost sooooo...

And then the ending was just like jack disappearing into the nothingness again and or being put into the gun in bl3...

[nortonluv]

Borderlands Masterlist

Characters I write for:

Handsome Jack

Mad Moxxi

Timothy Lawrence

Katagwa Jr.

Rhys Strongfork

Lilith

Patricia Tannis

Tyreen Calypso

Troy Calypso

Maya

Krieg

Axton

Salvador

Zer0

Gaige (Bl3)

Tina (Bl3)

+ more possibly to be added

Headcanons only will be posted here, Full fics will be posted on Ko-fi.

FLUFF

ANGST

(SMUT will also be Ko-fi only, I don't want under 18s to have immediate access yk, too dangerous they usually find away but this at least puts a barrier here.)

HURT/COMFORT

IMAGINES

FULL FICS (Ko-fi Only)

[pupsmailbox]

MUSIC ID PACK

NAMES ⌇　abby. ace. adagio. adam. adria. adrian. adriane. aero. alex. alice. angus. ann. anthony. apollo. ari. aria. ariane. ariette. avril. axl. axton. bill. billie. billy. blaze. bohemia. bon. brad. brian. bruce. cade. cadence. cadentia. cantrelle. charlie. cher. chester. chordelle. chordette. chordiene. chrissie. christine. cleo. cliff. coda. cosmo. crescenette. crescenne. cresciene. cruz. dahlia. danny. dave. david. dax. daze. dolce. dolcette. dolciene. dolciette. don. doremi. duff. dusty. echo. eddie. electra. ember. ensemblette. enslette. enzo. eric. estelle. faye. flash. fleetwood. florance. floyd. flux. forte. frank. freddie. geddy. geezer. gene. george. ginger. glenn. glimmer. grace. gregg. halen. halo. harmonette. harmonie. harmony. harp. hayley. helena. iggy. isis. izzy. jack. jasper. jett. jimi. jimmy. joe. john. juno. kade. kai. kairo. keira. keith. kian. knox. krist. kurt. larkin. larry. layla. liam. lindsey. lio. luna. lux. lyric. lyrical. mac. malcolm. maynard. medley. meliene. melodie. melodiette. melody. micheal. mick. mitch. moxie. muse. musette. musine. nancy. neal. neil. neon. nick. nicko. nicky. noel. note. notesie. notesy. nova. octavia. onyx. orchestrae. orchestraette. orchestraine. ozzy. paul. pax. pear. pete. peter. phil. piper. pulse. quest. randy. rave. rhea. rhythm. rick. ringo. riven. robert. roger. ronnie. rosa. rose. sabbath. sable. serj. sierra. sky. skye. sona. sonata. sonette. songbird. songesse. songette. songstress. sonia. sonic. sonnet. spark. steve. steven. stevie. strobe. symphonia. symponiette. talia. taryn. tempo. thom. tim. tom. tony. treble. trix. vibe. viola. violette. violiene. vyn. xara. zack. zeppelin.

PRONOUNS ⌇　aero/aero. ba/bass. band/band. base/base. beat/beat. black/black. blink/blink. bpm/bpm. chili/chili. crash/crash. cream/cream. cue/cue. cure/cure. door/door. dor/doremi. drop/drop. dru/drum. drum/drum. eagle/eagle. echo/echo. electric/electric. electro/electronic. fla/flash. flu/flute. flute/flute. for/forte. forte/forte. glo/glow. guitar/guitar. gun/gun. har/harp. heart/heart. hot/hot. hx/hxm. hy/hym. iron/iron. jam/jam. journey/journey. jump/jump. ke/key. kiss/kiss. la/lala. las/laser. loud/loud. ly/lyric. machine/machine. maiden/maiden. mel/melody. metal/metal. mix/mixed. mu/muse. mu/music. muse/muse. music/music. ne/neon. nirvana/nirvana. no/note. noe/note. note/note. oasis/oasis. oct/octave. pearl/pearl. pepper/pepper. perform/perform. pi/piano. pia/piano. piano/piano. pink/pink. queen/queen. ra/rave. radio/radio. rage/rage. re/reverb. red/red. reverb/reverb. rhy/rhythm. riff/riff. rock/rock. rose/rose. rush/rush. scorpion/scorpion. scream/scream. shred/shred. shx/hxr. shy/hyr. sing/sing. soe/song. soe/sonnet. sol/sola. song/song. spike/spike. stone/stone. string/string. stud/stud. sync/sync. tem/tempo. tempo/tempo. thxy/thxm. thy/thym. tra/track. tre/treble. treble/treble. trumpet/trumpet. tu/tune. tuba/tuba. tune/tune. vi/vibe. vio/violin. vocal/vocal. wa/wave. yell/yell. 🎤. 🎧. 🎵. 🎶. 🎷. 🎸. 🎹. 🎻. 🎼. 💥. 📹. 🔊. 🔋. 🔌. 🗯️. 🤘. 🥁. 🧑🏻‍🎤.

[wittness]

What kinda MLP horse would you be and if you have any ideas for other borderlands verse ppl please share

i’ve thought about this so much before omg.. i’ll give the most “important” folks aside from me and angel.

i’d be an alicorn, but not a true one. an attribute would probably be created, but i could see it be horn or wings. i fight with myself on it though. OH!! fun thought. pegasus, then gained a horn after the vault on elpis, so i end up being an alicorn instead. i mean yknow, thas a lotta magic! probably would’ve hidden the horn in my hair at first.

angel could be any to be honest, but maybe an earth pony, but gained the wings and horn when becoming a siren. alternative she starts as a unicorn.. the wings def wouldn’t be physical though, they’d be more like sunny’s i recon.

rhys could be a pegasus. vaughn an earth pony. yvette maybe a unicorn. ( wow, just like the cutie mark crusaders ). fiona and sasha maybe an earth ponies, but they could also be pegasus and unicorn respectively.

blake ( skrunkly ) would honestly probably be an earth pony, if he was anything else probably a pegasus. loaders would depend on the models but! normal ones are earth, ions as unicorns and jets as pegasi.

torgue could be a unicorn but could also entirely be an earth pony, pfft. wainwright could either an earth pony or a pegasus i think. kata guy jr uhhh unicorn maybe.

lilith probably would have the same thing happen as angel, maya too but maya would be a unicorn before i think.

moxxi, brick, marcus, scooter and ellie would be an earth pony. hammerlock could be either an earth pony or a unicorn, mordecai, earl and tina a unicorn. roland could be a pegasus or an earth pony.

not important but if you’re looking for preseqel stuff then assiter would be a hoity toity unicorn bitch. zarpe-nuts as either a unicorn or pegasus.

edit: i forgot the other vault hunters. LMAO.

axton could be pegasus or unicorn, salvador earth pony or unicorn, zer0 is unknown as is natural. athena unicorn, wilhelm earth pony, nisha earth pony, tim earth pony who gets fake wings and then horn ( limited magic ) later on.

and just for athena, janey as an earth pony or maybe pegasus. clay would fo sho be an earth pony.

[starfall-spirit]

Read on Ao3

Summary: Feyre takes some time to talk to one of her more reserved students, unveiling an adorable. yet heartbreaking Christmas wish.

OR

Rhys' little sister gets him a girlfriend.

“Three, two—” The bell above the studio door chimed and Ressina swept out from behind the front counter to greet the first arrivals for the evening class. A rambunctious pair of boys, ages eight and five. “Hello, my lovelies, I’ve missed you!”

Ressina was wonderful with the kids and had a particular fondness for greeting the younger classes and getting them settled. Turning away, Feyre finished setting out the paint and water before sitting down to start a few designs in pencil for the children to paint over. Elves, gingerbread men, angels, and snowmen. She’d need to draw a few more once the little ones had picked out what they wanted to draw, but it was good to get a little extra done before the place turned into a madhouse. 

It didn’t take long for all ten students to arrive, crowding into the studio and stripping out of their winter coats before sitting down at the table. The parents—and brother, in little Avyanna’s case—were left to line the walls, conversing among themselves. “What’s that, Ms. Feyre?”

She smiled. Avy was the meekest voice of the group, a bit wary of the children around her, though she’d seen her laughing with a few of the other girls on occasion and she seemed to be making better social progress with each class. “We’ll be painting ornaments today. You get to pick your favorite design and paint it whatever colors you want. Then Miss Ressina and I will dry it here and give you some pretty ribbon when you come back next week so you can hang it on your tree for your family to enjoy.”

Her eyes widened, lighting up with excitement. “I’d like an angel. Please.”

Feyre gave her another warm smile. “I’ll set this in your spot. Go grab an apron so you don’t stain that pretty shirt.”

“I appreciate the foresight you ladies have for that.” 

Feyre jumped, turning to face the new speaker. At least after two months of classes she could keep from blushing like a fool around him. “Sorry. I didn't notice you Mr. Axton—”

“I think we’ve attended enough lessons to justify you calling me Rhys. I’m sorry to interrupt, but I need to head outside for a moment to make a call, if that’s alright?” 

“Of course. We’re all set here if you need to step out. She’ll be fine.”

“Excellent. Pardon me.” Ruffling his sister’s hair, he stepped back out into the cold, pressing the phone to his ear, a scowl on his face the next time he spoke.

“Do you like my brother?” Avy asked the next time she circled back to their group. A bit startled by the subject, she hesitated to answer. “He likes you, you know.” The statement was out of the blue, an absent thought as she started to paint the angel wings as precisely as any six year old could. “He doesn’t talk about it, but he watches you while we’re here. I think it would make him happy if you went on a date. Happier than he is now, at least.” She had a solemn look about her, her shoulders curving in slightly. “That’s all I want this Christmas. For him to do something that makes him happy.”

While the other children around them were distracted with each other and their art, the parents in hearing range had been following the one sided conversation and were either looking on with amusement at Feyre’s awkwardness or pity for the girl’s homelife. She couldn’t imagine it was easy, going into the holidays just months after losing their parents to a fatal highway crash. 

And how does one tell an elementary-schooler you can’t make people happy by dropping them into a spontaneous date with a stranger. “Sweetheart, I think you and your brother are going to have an amazing Christmas together, especially if you’re with those uncles you keep telling me about.”

“Just wait til he gets back. You’ll see.”

~~~~~

Even smudged with paint and charcoal, the shop owner was gorgeous. Gorgeous and amazing with his sister, which did nothing to help how distracted he was today, trying and failing to tune into the nonsense his uncle was spewing in his ear. “Your parents are dead, Rhysand. If you don’t get a move on—”

“Tell me again, Kier, how I should run this business more like my father. I’m dying for a reason to kick you off the board for good.” Silence. “You’d do well to remember who this company was bequeathed to.”

“Of course, Rhysand,” he ground out. “I didn’t mean to overstep.”

“Then don’t. Get me the contract I requested. I’ll review it in the morning.” 

He shoved his phone back in his pocket, rolling his neck as he calmed himself. If there was one thing he prided himself on it was not letting this shitstorm bleed into his time with his little sister. She was still too young to understand the truth behind a lot that had happened in their life. A mercy and curse, as he was left to question how long he could live with himself, telling her their parents’ car crash was a highway accident.

It was the right call for now, but as her guardian, he still felt like shit. He looked back through the window, spotting Avy in the middle of the table, quiet and reserved among her peers. It was a work in progress, breaking the six-year-old of their father’s rigid teachings, but he had seen glimpses of the rowdy kid she could be once she realized it wouldn’t get her in trouble. 

He pushed back into the art studio, removing his jacket and taking the empty seat beside Avyanna. “How’s it going, Avy?”

“Good. Ms. Feyre’s been helping me. She did the pencil part, see,” she showed him, tracing her finger over the cartoonish pencil marks that outlined the angel design Avy had chosen. She frowned, setting her paintbrush on her paper towel. “Was that Uncle Keir again? You didn’t look happy outside.”

“Ah, I fixed what needed to be fixed. No trouble in sight. What are you painting?”

She was quiet for a moment, likely trying to determine if he was hiding something that should be her business. “An ornament. Miss Ressina has some pretty ribbon we can hang them with so I can take it home and put it on the tree.”

“That sounds like an excellent plan, Avy.”

“How are we doing over here?” Feyre asked the cluster of children, immediately receiving overlapping progress reports on various snowmen, angels, elves, and gingerbread men. 

His sister was still as a statue, looking almost guilty as her instructor checked the paint and water cups around the table. Both of them were doing an excellent job of refusing to make eye contact with him, and Rhys found himself missing the fleeting-yet-bright smile the art teacher normally gifted him once or twice a lesson. 

Avy was far too well-behaved to have made any trouble for the two women leading the weekly lessons and Feyre seemed naturally at ease with parents and students alike. Whatever had shifted would need to be addressed, but it could wait until they weren’t dealing with eavesdroppers. 

“You don’t have to hover, you know,” his sister said, a bit of snark rising in companionship to that guilt. “I can paint on my own.”

Rhys frowned, but respected her request, walking back around the table to stand on the opposite wall. “What am I missing here?” he muttered. 

A father to his right chuckled. “Other than your sister telling Feyre you have a crush on her loud enough for the room to hear, nothing much.”

“Oh, is that all?” His eyes slid back to Feyre. Though she had likely brushed off the prospect of a date with him, something had been said that was weighing her down and it didn’t seem to lift for the rest of the lesson. He honestly didn’t care what the other guardians thought about him staying after they had all shuffled out. “Avy, put on your coat and wait by the door for me, okay?”

“Are you  asking Ms. Feyre on a date?”

“Avyanna, door.” She scampered away and he let out a long sigh, earning a chuckle from Ressina. “Sorry.”

She shook her head. “Feyre, come out here for a moment.”

“Yeah, what’s… up. Hi, Mr.—” He clicked his tongue softly. Feyre sighed in surrender. “Rhys, what can I do for you?”

Ressina was courteous enough to take up whatever was left in the back, leaving Feyre and Rhys with only a six year old for company. “This evening, it came to my attention that my sister made some insinuations that caused you discomfort.”

Her eyes widened in panic. “No!” Blushing, she cleared her throat, stating more calmly, “No, it wasn’t uncomfortable. I just didn’t want to get her hopes up. I didn’t think there was much substance behind…”

“A six-year-old’s second-hand love proclamations?”

She bit her lip. “Something like that. She just… She said it was her Christmas wish for you to be happy. I didn’t want her thinking a good holiday season hinged on romance.”

He swallowed. Did he really come off as someone so miserable Avy said this was her Christmas wish? The business demands were putting him through the wringer, but he thought he was better at wearing a mask. “I appreciate that. All the same though, if you weren’t currently seeing someone… more accurately, if you were interested in going out… Are you free on Saturday?”

Feyre chewed her lip. “Are you asking me because you want to ask me, or just to appease a six-year-old, because I won’t be part of something that—”

He waived his hand in a motion ment to cut off her concern. “If I didn’t have feelings for you I would have nipped this in the bud and left the studio as soon as her ornament was set to dry. I like you, Feyre. So what do you say?”

“Saturday. Can you pick me up from here?”

~~~~~

Taglist: @lulling-night-sky // @edgyellie // @shallyne // @the-lonelybarricade // @darling-archeron // @goddess-aelin // @the-lost-changeling // @faeriequeensuriel // @pandavelaris // @s-uppertime // @elentiya-whitethorn // @acotar-fanns // @jealousveronya // @acourtofwips // @reverie-tales // @gwynkyrie // @corcracrow // @thelovelymadone // @rosanna-writer

[rlyc00l]

Rhys gets to know his new "team" as he tries to get a handle on his potentially profitable (but let's be real, most likely fatal) situation. Claptrap is irritating. A certain helmet-wearing asshole seems intent on making things difficult.

Hi guys I had a few chapters basically ready to go (mostly laid out and just needing some editing) and you know what? I'm just gonna post them as they're ready.

EDIT: Chapter also under the break!

———— A few of Rhys’s new bandit companions had taken it upon themselves to haul out the corpses and body parts that littered the place. Rhys would have offered to help, but corpses were pretty gross and he had claimed himself a nice warm spot by the furnace. 

He wasn’t the only one not participating, that first one he’d met–who he’d started mentally referring to with the inventive nickname of “Helmet Asshole”–ignored the corpses in favor of rifling through cabinets, boxes, and shelves, occasionally pocketing ammo or whatever else they found. The big, masked bandit sat beside the fire, holding his hands nearly inside the flames. And the Claptrap rolled around, complaining about his missing eye and bumping into things. 

As the others finally settled in for the night, Rhys found it impossible to fall asleep, lying there on the hard metal floor. Nearby, the fire crackled, the Claptrap whirred, one of the bandits snored, and the big one murmured to himself. Sighing, he rolled onto his back and opened a map on his ECHOeye interface. There had to be a way back to Helios–some Hyperion outpost or something. 

Or, nothing. There was nothing. Nothing in any direction, for miles. Just ice and a few abandoned villages, some marked “Bandit Infested”. Silently, Rhys apologized to Handsome Jack for ever doubting his propaganda. It seemed his only choice was to stick with this pack of bandits who, for now, had decided against killing him. He could figure things out as he went. Every trial was an opportunity in disguise, wasn’t it? Wasn’t that how that motivational poster went? The one with Handsome Jack, standing on the corpse of the Destroyer. 

This was the planet that made Jack the man he was, after all. He could prove himself here. If these bandits were important enough that Jack wanted them dead, this was the opportunity of a lifetime. 

Rhys sat up, confirming everyone was asleep before activating his ECHOeye and scanning the soldier, sleeping a few feet away. Axton. Ex-Dahl commando, dishonorable discharge. War criminal. Five billion reward. Surely Jack would pay a percentage of that for his location. Maybe, Rhys would find a chance to covertly ECHO into Hyperion without alerting the bandits. Jack himself would send down soldiers and a ride back home. If Rhys survived, he’d live a long life as the second richest man on Helios. Next, he scanned the short one–Salvador–who slept propped up against a wall, snoring. Salvador was a Pandoran native with a long list of crimes, cannibalism among them. A 720 billion bounty. If Rhys were a stronger man, this room would practically be an Eridium mine. But there was no fooling himself, he stood no chance in a fight. No, he’d just scan them, one by one. His ECHOeye history would serve to prove to Hyperion that he was in close proximity to them.

Next, Helmet Asshole. He’d seen them situate themself further from the others, on a couch against the wall, or…Wait, where’d they go? He looked around the room. Gone. 

Had they moved on alone? Fine by him, that was one less bandit.

Rhys sat up enough to see the teenager. It was hard to feel good about the prospect of selling out a kid, but sacrifices had to be made.

Gaige. A high school senior right out of Eden-5, tech-wiz, and total nerd, built a killer robot that murdered another student. 

Too bad, she could have made something of herself in Hyperion. Her bounty was 820 billion, leaving Rhys to wonder how they came up with these numbers. If he could take any of these bandits in a fight, it was the teenager. Her crappy, bargain bin cybernetic arm looked homemade. 

Then there was the big guy, still murmuring to himself. He tossed and turned as he slept, the other sleepers had given him a wide berth. 

Krieg. “Property of Hyperion”. That gave Rhys pause. He’d heard the rumors, bandits and incompetent employees alike dragged off to laboratories on Pandora for unethical experiments. The guy looked like the product of that sort of thing. It was hard not to pity him, but listening to the murmurings of “No…flayed her shining jugular…wear your face as a hat…ribcage tied into knots…” Okay, right, whatever he was, probably best off with Hyperion now. A hundred billion.  

Maya. She seemed human, almost normal, despite threatening him. She’d stood up for him and helped him out. Even so–  

“What are you doing?” Helmet Asshole materialized out of previously empty space, looming over him. In a swift motion, they crouched, their eponymous helmet a foot away from his face. 

Rhys shut off the ECHOeye. “Nothing, I–” They grabbed his chin, forcibly turning his head to face them as they leaned closer. “An ECHOeye. No surprise. / You were scanning them.” 

He glanced sideways. Everyone was still sleeping, Helmet Asshole had been keeping their voice down. “And what the hell were you doing?” he hissed. 

“Doesn’t concern you. / You’re the Hyperion stooge. / Will you sell us out?” 

Rhys hesitated. “Look, I-I’m just trying to get my bearings here. They pointed guns at me. I needed to find out who I’m dealing with.” 

They considered for a moment, releasing his face. It ached where they’d held him. “Understandable. / Was there anything of note? / I would like to know.” 

He looked at them, doubting he’d heard right. “I mean, they’re all dangerous wanted murderers? I-I don’t know what you’re looking for. No entries saying ‘they’ll kill you in your sleep’ but…” 

“Nothing useful?” “Depends on your definition of useful.”

They sighed and projected something blindingly bright in his face, Rhys turned away from the glare. 

“It’s of no matter,” they said, standing. “I will warn you. Sell me out, / And I’ll have your head.” 

“Right. I will definitely not do that.” Red light was still dancing in his vision. 

They stood and returned to their couch, lying down with their legs hanging over the end. There’d be no way of knowing when they fell asleep. No more scanning, then. He lay back, closing his eyes. 

———

“Wake up, my loyal minions! You have a bullymong to kill and a fearless leader to avenge!” It was still dim when the Claptrap began zipping around again, running into anyone too slow to get out of the way, occasionally letting out an “oof” or “ow.” The others woke with groggy protests and threats. “Knuckle-Dragger won’t know what hit him! It’ll be bullets and lots of them! Presumably! I guess it could also be swords, or fists, or a hatchet, or a really big stick, or…” Rhys was sore, hungry, and tired. Never had he wanted to murder anything so bad as he wanted to murder that stupid loud robot. He half-expected one of the bandits to do him a favor in that regard, impulsive as bandits were known to be, but none of them stepped up to the task. 

They were soon all out the door, and onto the bright, icy tundra. Helmet Asshole quickly got ahead of them, as did the blinded Claptrap. Sometimes, someone would warn it before it fell off a ledge or ran into something, but more often, they just let it happen. 

Before long Krieg was rushing after the robot, kicking up snow and laughing with his buzzaxe raised high, never bringing it down to smash the thing’s head in.  

“Wait! I found your larynx putrefying on the rocks! Why aren’t you suffocating?!” 

His movements were as erratic. Every once in a while he’d stop suddenly, twitching or smacking himself, sometimes delivering an intense one-eyed stare to one of the others. Rhys was on the receiving end of most of those. 

“Hey, uh, aren’t guys like him kind of murder-happy and extremely unpredictable?” Rhys asked Maya, keeping his voice low after the third murderous-looking glare in the past half hour. 

“Like your boss?” 

“I…I guess. Former boss, for the record.” Rhys ignored the urge to defend Jack’s decisions regarding murder. “But I mean, is it safe having him around?” 

“I think everyone’s wondering the same thing about you.” “I’m not waving around a buzzaxe and yelling about larynxes.” “Fair, but Krieg seems to be pretty in control of everything but his mouth. More or less.” 

“He keeps looking at me like he wants to rip out my spine.”

Maya shrugged. “From what I can gauge, Hyperion did that to him. Can you blame him? He helped me out earlier, and he was the first one to decide not to kill you. Perhaps you should be more open-minded?” 

“No, I think maybe you’re being too open-minded,” Axton cut in from behind, stepping in beside Rhys. “That guy’s been filled chock full of eridium. People like that? Ticking time bombs. He’s second place on the list of guys who’ll probably kill us in our sleep. You’re third, by the way, Reeze.” He grinned as he said it.

“It’s Rhys, and uh…” He gave a choked chuckle, trying to figure out if the guy was joking or not. “I’m not planning to? Uh, who’s first? On that list.” 

“That would be Zer0.” He gestured to Helmet Asshole, walking alone, far out of earshot. They seemed to glide across the snow while the rest trudged through it. “If I were Jack, I would have hired them to finish us off. Creepy bastard.” Rhys watched them. They were near the Claptrap. The robot was chattering at them, giving the others a blessed break from its voice. “I mean, to be fair, they had ample opportunity to kill me after the train crashed.” He said it half to reassure himself. 

Axton laughed. “Huh, wonder why not, Hyperion.” 

“Hey, if Jack meant for me to play double agent, he wouldn’t have tried to blow me up.” 

“Yeah, I don’t get that. Why not kill you normally?” It was the first time Gaige had bothered acknowledging Rhys since their first encounter–until now she’d just been giving him quick, suspicious looks. “You don’t look hard to kill.”

“Make it look like an accident, I guess? He didn’t want to martyr me. My whole division might have rebelled.”  It was a good question, now that he considered it. Maybe Vasquez’s traditional airlock method would get him in trouble unless he tore out all of Rhys’s cybernetics. Vasquez wasn’t patient enough for those surgical procedures. “I was speaking out against what Jack’s been doing here, on Pandora. And subtly influencing things, y’know? Di-diverting shipments, sabotaging production, stuff like that.” That sounded pretty good.

“Wow, that’s almost respectable. I mean, not as much as you know, not working for Hyperion in the first place, but good on you, I guess?” Gaige said. 

 “Hey, I had to make a living somehow, and I’m not exactly Dahl-soldier material.”

“You shoulda killed someone,” Salvador caught him by surprise from below his field of vision. The man was a little over five feet tall and nearly as wide–all of it muscle. Something about him was more intimidating than even Krieg. “I woulda killed someone. Preferably Jack.” 

“I uh, yeah, I guess I should have… To be fair, I didn’t get a chan–” 

He was interrupted by the Claptrap’s shrill cry. Up ahead, the bot was in its panic mode, its limbs retracted as it shuddered in simulated terror. A bullymong, near the same size as Salvador, was charging toward it. At least a dozen more were climbing out of burrows in the nearby ice wall.

The bandits had drawn their weapons before Rhys processed what was happening. Backing away, he glimpsed Zer0, appearing in the first bullymong’s path. Salvador wielded a pair of guns, laughing and firing both with little regard for Krieg, who ran straight through the line of fire without slowing. 

“Ah! The meat delivery is here!” Krieg shouted, swinging his buzzaxe into the nearest foe.  

Rhys didn’t see where Gaige or Axton had gone to, nor did he know how everyone got so far from him so fast, but he found himself alone in the open. 

One of the bullymongs, repelled by Salvador’s gunfire, chose him as an easier target. Remembering the stun rod, he yanked it from his belt, barely managing to activate it before the creature reached him. He jabbed at it, unleashing a jolt of electricity into its shoulder. It let out a pained roar, but didn’t let up. It began to circle him from a distance, testing for an opening. Turning, he kept the stun rod between him and the bullymong. It stepped forward, he jabbed in its direction, it backed away, then tried again. Rhys was feeling good about this, he’d just keep it up until–

Something crashed into him from behind, knocking him face-first into the snow. A second bullymong. It stood on his back, one oversized hand clamped around his arm, another pushed his head down. He turned the stun rod in his hand and jabbed backward. Empty air. The creature roared. Rhys felt its breath on his scalp, saliva dribbling into his hair. 

Oh shit. Shit shit shit shit shit shit shitshitshitshitshit–

All at once, the weight lifted from him. He rolled over in time to see the bullymong floating above him, surrounded by a strange energy. Then Krieg drove his buzzaxe into it, spattering both himself and Rhys in hot gore. The bullymong’s limp body was thrown off to the side. 

Sitting up and looking around, he saw the other bullymong lying already dead in front of him, Maya standing over it. Her tattoos seemed to glow. Elsewhere the gunfire had ceased, the fighting had finished. 

He shakily got to his feet, heart still pounding. “You gonna be alright?” Maya asked. The glow had already faded.  

He gave a weak nod, forcing a smile. “Yeah, yeah, I’m great. I’m just… I’m great.” He thought he might throw up, but he’d try to hold off on that for now. Nothing felt broken, at least. He wiped his face on his sleeve and brushed loose snow from his clothes. Some of it had melted into the fabric when he’d fallen, and some of that had already frozen again. Hopefully, they’d find somewhere warm soon.

“Ah! Sweet treats from the flesh pinata!” Krieg was absolutely riddled with bullet holes, but he gave Rhys the happiest look a single visible eye could muster. 

“Is he gonna be okay?”

Maya looked Krieg up and down, a hand on her hip. “He doesn’t seem to be dying anytime soon. How you feeling, big guy?” 

“Ten thousand decapitations!”

“Sounds good to me.” 

“Looks like we walked right into a nest,” he heard Axton say. “I’m like, ninety percent sure these are human bones…Oh yeah, that’s definitely someone’s skull.” 

There were little scattered piles of bullymong refuse, mostly bones, sometimes a bit of fur. Something shiny and yellow gleamed in a nearby pile. A halfway-decent Hyperion pistol. Exactly what Rhys needed–next time he could defend himself. 

He approached, only to have Zer0 once again materialize in front of him. They bent over, picked up the gun, and turned it in their hands with a “Hmm…” Their helm projected an ellipses. 

“Hey uh, can I have that? I’m feeling a little vulnerable here, with just this.” He raised the deactivated stun rod. 

“You know how to shoot?” they asked. 

“It’s Hyperion, it’s made so anyone can pick it up and shoot.” That was one of their advertising lines, at least. It didn’t seem that hard to figure out. “It’s as good a time as any to learn, right?” 

They looked at him and back at the gun. “Next time, you should move faster.” The pistol evaporated into particles as they deconstructed it into their storage deck. A slashed zero projected from their helmet. “If you live that long.” They turned away, leaving Rhys scrambling for an insult he couldn’t find. “Oh, come on!” he shouted after them. “You didn’t even want that!” 

———

Somehow, Rhys survived the rest of the day’s trek. The group encountered two smaller packs of bullymongs before it ended. Absurdly, the value of Rhys’s life seemed to be a rung lower than the Claptrap’s, but if he stayed close to the bot he was equally protected.The tactic struck him as pathetic when everyone else was more than capable of defending themselves. Worse, it gave the Claptrap the opportunity to bother him, and that stupid little bot had exceptional hearing. 

“Wimping out, eh? Don’t feel too bad, chum, we all gotta start somewhere! Except me, I was built with the courage of ten men! But as for you, I’m sure you’ll find your courage if you don’t die horribly. Which probably won’t happen–or wait, what temperature do humans freeze to death at? Ah, well, nothing you can do if that happens. I guess you also have to worry about all the bullets, and the…” 

Rhys fought the temptation to try his ECHOeye on the thing, see if he could mute it. Who knew what malware a defunct idiot robot had on it? At least the blindness allowed him to sneak away as soon as the danger subsided. It made him wonder why they were even bothering to hunt down the thing’s eye. Was a blind Claptrap so bad? Besides the being-a-Claptrap part? 

When they stopped for the night to make camp, Zer0 rejoined the group. 

“I’ve spotted its tracks. / It has passed through recently. / We’ll need to keep watch.” 

“You wanna give us any specific details, or do ya gotta stick to seventeen syllables?” Axton asked. “Like, you know, where’s it headed, how long ago, that kind of thing?” 

They gave him a look that seemed meant as a glare before sitting near the fire. “Is there food?” they more demanded than asked. 

“Salvador’s working on it,” Gaige said. 

Dinner was to be the meaty arms of a bullymong that Krieg had buzzsawed off. It didn’t look edible, but both Krieg and Salvador insisted it was good. Or, in the former’s case, that it “Hole punches your bloodied tongue!” said with the kind of enthusiasm that made it sound positive.The latter was cooking one of the limbs over the fire. It smelled like pork with a trace of burnt plastic. Rhys hadn’t eaten for the better part of two days. He was hungry enough to risk…toxins, or whatever.

When it was cooked, though, he found himself almost equally concerned with watching Zer0 as he was with chewing the tough, strange meat. He wasn’t alone in this, he realized. Everyone but Krieg and the Claptrap were snatching glances, apparently wondering if they’d see what was underneath the helmet. But Zer0 only walked away with their portion, vanishing behind a jagged chunk of ice. 

“Anyone up to following them?” Axton asked. 

“I suspect they’re the type to kill you if you see their face,” Maya gave a shrug, her attention returning to her meal. 

“The curiosity is gonna kill me on its own. I mean, what if they’re a robot or something, and we’re wasting food?” 

“They were bleeding, before,” Rhys put in. “After the train blew up.”  

“Puncture the skinsuit! Make it pop!” Krieg was shoving bits of meat up through the bottom of his mask, also denying the others a view of his face. He was at least clearly human, mutated as he may be. 

“Eh. Probably just super ugly,” Salvador said through a mouth full of bullymong. 

———

Rhys was spared from keeping watch that night. Maybe there was something to being a weak Hyperion stooge, it meant a few hours’ extra rest. 

It was still dark when he woke shivering. Somewhere, something howled raucously. He sat up, looking around. Thankfully, the Claptrap was in sleep-mode, and the others were asleep. Except for Zer0. They stopped pacing the camp to look at him. He gave them a slight wave. They went back to pacing without so much as a second glance. They reminded Rhys of a big cat at a zoo, waiting to be fed. 

His ECHOeye told him it was 12:22 AM. Zer0 should have ended their watch and woken Maya hours ago. He hadn’t seen them sleep at all.  

“Are those more bullymong?” he asked when Zer0 was near again. “They sound really close.” 

They stopped, gave a nod. He noticed they were shivering. They were so lanky, even compared to him. How well insulated from the cold could they possibly be? He’d feel bad for them if they hadn’t been such an asshole. 

“Should we be worried?” “I never worry. / If they venture near enough, / My blade will find them.” 

“Right...” Geez, edgelord much?

They cocked their head, thoughtfully. “Though, perhaps you should. / If you fall a second time. / You may not be saved.” 

“You could have let me have the gun.” “I could have.”  

He lay back down. “Your watch is up, you know?” Rhys had years of experience dealing with assholes, he’d learned to be professional about this sort of thing. 

“Yes.” 

“You should probably sleep, right?” 

“I need little sleep. / The others will miss something. / I will stay awake.” 

That seemed slightly insulting to the other’s abilities, but at least Zer0 wasn’t only a condescending dick to Rhys. He considered pointing out their place on Axton’s “Most likely to kill us in our sleep” list, but thought better of it. Might give them ideas. 

[vaulthunting]

all gifs on my profile are by flou (artstation)

vaulthunting is a blog run by @deepslate where i reblog as much borderlands stuff as i can :) see below for tag navigation!!

also sorry if this appears in a search :( just ignore it

GAMES

Borderlands Borderlands the Presequel Borderlands 2 Borderlands 3 Tales from the Borderlands Tiny Tina's Wonderlands New Tales from the Borderlands

Borderlands Movie

PLAYER CHARACTERS

Lilith the Siren Roland the Soldier Mordecai the Hunter Brick the Berserker

Athena the Gladiator Nisha Kadam the Lawbringer Wilhelm the Enforcer Claptrap Timothy Lawrence the Doppelganger Aurelia Hammerlock the Baroness

Maya the Siren Axton the Commando Salvador the Gunzerker Zer0 the Assassin Gaige the Mechromancer Kreig the Psycho

Amara the Siren Fl4k the Beastmaster Zane Flynt the Operative Moze the Gunner

Rhys Strongfork Fiona the Con Artist

NPCS (ALPHABETICAL ORDER)

Angel Alistair Hammerlock Buttstallion Captain Scarlett Clay Dr Zed Ellie Hodunk Felicity Rampant Handsome Jack Janey Springs Katagawa Jr Lor(elei) Mad Moxxi Mr Torgue Patricia Tannis Sasha the Kid Sister Scooter

Shade (Tiny) Tina Tyreen Calypso Troy Calypso Wainwright Jakobs

CONTENT TYPES

art gif image text post

MISC

designs cosplay ships (relationships) au (alternate universe) oc (original character)

[kolbasos]

🍖Tagged by @duckydusky THANK U FOR TAGGIN ME ‼️❤️❤️❤️

🍖Last song: IC3PEAK - crack in the ground

🍖Currently watching: nonthin! but plannin on watching saw series!

🍖Currently consuming: disco elysium!!! and ofc still thinkin bout, drawing borderlands with a bit of mcsm

🍖Three ships: (i dont really have fav ships personally cuz it implies characters being together romantically healthy like happy ever after couple biss BUT‼️ i like exploring just simple interactions/any sort of chermistry) with that in mind i like rhack (with atlas rhys ONLY), jack n tim (again, not a romance), harry de bois/kim kitsuragi (im fine with anything as long as its deep and full of canon stuff)

🍖Favorite color: pink!! more presise rose gold

🍖First ship: dont remember but in borderlands series its Jack/Axton ☆⌒（＊＾∇゜）v

🍖Relationship status: single?

🍖Last movie: bullet train (ФωФ)

🍖Currently working on: comissions and just drawing 24/7 to improve

🍖Tagging: my dear mutuals i hope yall dont mind 😭❤️ if i could tag ALL my mutuals itd be too long so @queenofyandxre @huiqqqhui @mr-areyoustupid @diertlag @shinakazami1 @solovskyaa and anyone who sees this and wants to do it!