#Reward Sensitivity

[xtruss]

Hoi Chan

How To Strengthen Your Happiness Muscle

Psychologists Call It Reward Sensitivity. And Simple Steps Can Help You Boost Your Drive To Seek Out Positive Emotions and Enjoy Life.

— By Jenny Taitz | August 19, 2024 | The New York Times

We’ve all experienced it: the urge to withdraw and duck experiences we know we’ll enjoy — even when a mood boost is what we need most. We skip the birthday party. We cancel lunch. They just don’t seem worth the effort. And then, more likely than not, we feel worse than we did before.

So how do you find the motivation to get out there, especially when you’re feeling low, stressed, tired or lonely? One proven strategy is to strengthen what psychologists call your reward sensitivity.

Our drive to seek out happiness is a muscle that we can develop. So is our ability to relish experiences. And almost anyone can learn to amp up their reward sensitivity by training themselves to notice and savor their positive emotions. That’s even true for people with depression and anxiety who struggle to experience pleasure, a condition called anhedonia.

Of course, all of us have trouble pursuing pleasure sometimes. I recently took my young sons to the beach for the weekend. Hours before our getaway, I learned a friend had died. Numbed by the news, I was in no mood to have a good time, even though I wanted to make things special for my family.

It’s part of my job as a therapist to teach people how to manage their emotions. And as I tell my patients, it’s possible to honor legitimate sources of pain and still recognize that moments of brightness improve our well-being.

The research-backed strategies below, which I use in my practice, helped me to make the most of our trip.

Reward Sensitivity and Mental Health.

When it comes to mental health treatment, doctors and therapists tend to focus on easing their patients’ negative symptoms — they want “to take away the bad,” explained Alicia Meuret, a professor of psychology at Southern Methodist University.

Yet most of us don’t just need to reduce pain, we also need to boost joy.

In fact, improving positive emotions can be a higher priority for patients than containing their depressive symptoms. And research shows that treatments based on this idea can be effective.

A 2023 study co-led by Dr. Meuret found that when adults experiencing depression or anxiety participated in 15 weeks of psychotherapy focused on enhancing positive emotions, they reported more improvement than a group whose therapy focused on reducing negative emotions.

Shorter interventions have shown benefits as well. A 2024 study of 85 students, led by Lucas LaFreniere, an assistant professor of psychology at Skidmore College, gave subjects with anxiety regular smartphone prompts to plan pleasurable activities, savor positive moments and look forward to future positive events. After a week, they showed significantly improved feelings of optimism.

An Exercise To Boost Your Reward Sensitivity.

To raise your reward sensitivity, you can try an exercise based on the treatment plans in these studies. Make it a daily practice for as long as it’s helpful, but commit to at least a week.

Begin by planning one activity per day that will make you happy or give you a sense of accomplishment. This will make you less likely to postpone positive experiences. Be realistic — it can be as small as treating yourself to a favorite snack, reading a few pages of a novel or FaceTiming a friend.

After you’ve enjoyed that daily moment, close your eyes and recount out loud, in the present tense, where and when you experienced the greatest joy. Home in on details and physical sensations, like the breeze cooling your face as the sun shines. This all might feel hokey, but don’t gloss over the specifics, Dr. Meuret cautioned. The idea isn’t just to remember how you felt, but to amplify and reexperience it.

Psychologists call the process of identifying and immersing in positive emotions savoring.

“Growing the glow of positive emotions,” as Dr. LaFreniere put it, strengthens your memory of them, and increases your motivation to seek them out going forward. Savoring also helps counteract the very human tendency to focus on and remember negative aspects of an event: the friend who was 15 minutes late, the thing you wish you hadn’t said.

More Ways To Stretch Positive Feelings.

Here are some more subtle but powerful tweaks you can make to nurture a positive mind-set.

Expand Your Joy Vocabulary: Many of us struggle to label our positive emotions much beyond fine, good or great. But research suggests that finding more words to describe those feelings can validate and intensify them, Dr. Meuret said. When reflecting on how something made you feel, try to be precise, using words like serene, elated, exhilarated, delighted, inspired.

Share Your Highlight Reel: Think about the details you typically volunteer when asked about your day or a recent trip. It can be tempting to vent. But broadcasting what made you happiest can make you feel better, spread that happiness to another person — and also strengthen a bond, said Charlie Taylor, an associate professor of psychiatry at the University of California, San Diego, who researches social reward sensitivity.

Find Silver Linings: With practice, it’s possible to notice the positives hidden in things that we might first see as negative, Dr. Taylor said. For example, if you invited co-workers to get together and only one person showed up, you could easily view that as a failure. But the silver lining, he said, would be that you got to know that one person better.

Forecast Future Wins: If looking at your calendar sparks dread, Dr. Meuret said, pick an event that’s approaching and think of the best possible outcome. If you’re tired and want to back out of meeting a friend for a workout, picture an especially energizing class. Imagine smiling at each other across the room, feeling proud. Using imagery can encourage motivation and prime you for more uplifting experiences, Dr. Meuret explained.

Give Yourself Permission To Feel Happy.

Keep in mind, too, that it’s normal to sometimes feel uncomfortable with pleasurable feelings, particularly if you experience depression and anxiety.

“Some people can feel vulnerable when they let themselves feel good,” Dr. LaFreniere said. Worrying can make you feel like you’re ready to respond to threats — but by constantly prepping for disaster, he said, we miss the happiness in front of us right now.

On my recent weekend trip with my kids, it was a challenge to let myself have fun. But sharing s’mores by the glistening ocean still filled me with lingering delight. I made sure to pause and savor the best parts, like when some florists gave us fistfuls of hydrangeas and roses from a wedding arch they were taking apart alongside the beach. I felt waves of sadness crashing through the trip, thinking of the friend I had lost, but letting myself bask in love and levity helped me find my balance again.

“The truth is,” Dr. LaFreniere said, “sometimes we need to behave like happy people if we actually want to be happy.”

— Jenny Taitz is a Practicing Psychologist and an Assistant Clinical Professor of Psychiatry.

[tommysbrat]

bratty power bottom dom buck + daddy service top sub tommy would be a lethal combination

[gemmasdeadwife]

Pre-post disclaimer that I’m absolutely not someone who ships either markgemma or markhelly to the exclusion of the other, or wants one out of the way. I hate that shit and both relationships are extremely important. I do like to speculate about them without that burden of being pressured to pick one and shit on the other.

A lot of people are talking about how Mark and Gemma are now too different for their marriage to ever work again. Which is totally valid and makes sense, and something I’ve thought about a lot myself. It’s such a normal, everyday tragedy for relationships to be broken by trauma, distance, change. But… what if it’s actually the opposite…?

Which I know is a mega fucked thing to say about endless torture! But idk… I think for Mark it could put their struggles with infertility into perspective. Obviously that was huge and traumatic, but maybe there was no need for it to eclipse their marriage- there was so much more to it than that. And I think he’s learning (VERY SLOWLY) to confront his obstacles head-on instead of running away and lashing out at his loved ones. I think it would be hard for him to ever take her for granted again, and if he started to slip that way, it wouldn’t take a lot of reminding for him to shape up.

Gemma of course didn’t really need to change- that’s the bigger part of the problem here to me. Maybe she was a little naïve for getting into the Lumon stuff that she did, but how could she have possibly known? She was just analyzing interesting little puzzles, a welcome distraction from feeling so hopeless. If she did display any naïveté, I think there’s pretty much zero chance of that ever cropping up again after what she’s been through.

The biggest issues still are the trauma and how much they’ve each changed. Is their trauma around each other, and their pedestalization of each other while they were apart, too great for them to have a relationship again? I think it could go either way. For one thing, the trauma is going to be difficult with all of their relationships going forward, including Mark and Helly too. I don’t believe that the deeply traumatized can’t love properly- it just takes a fuckton of work.

Changing over time is also a problem in any long term relationship, though it’s harder when you’re not together through the change, and this is more unusual and fucked up than being apart during a deployment or something. I think they will have to get to know each other all over again very carefully, gently and gradually. It’s natural if there are some missteps along the way. They aren’t the same people they were before the “death,” and they aren’t the idolized versions of each other they pined over through separation, either. And that will either result in falling in love in a whole new way, or else realizing romance doesn’t make sense between them anymore, but remaining family- I think that bond between them is too strong to become nothing, but it could transform.

[quinloki]

Hm.... should reader acquiesce or defy?

[proudfreakmetarusonikku]

people act like bc influencers get away with so much bullshit that people are snowflakes for pointing out that the shit they do would be illegal in any 9/5 but like. it’s literally just bc it’s way harder to get evidence for stuff that happens online. they’re not getting off the hook bc it’s actually not that bad they’re getting off the hook bc no one can technically provide evidence for criminal activity they’ve admitted to doing.

[northern-passage]

i've been thinking a lot about the word "representation" and what it means and how it's changed over the last few years, particularly when it comes to the writing/publishing landscape but also in movies and tv shows… and i really don't like it anymore. to be clear, of course i think it's important to have diversity in your work, i'm not saying i hate the concept of representation. but i do really dislike the way it's used now, and i really just hate the word itself

in a broader sense it's just become a marketing tool. i'm not impressed by any publisher or author who just describes their book by listing all of the minorities/identities the characters represent as if that should be enough. it feels very gross, very exploitative and disingenuous. it also really bothers me because it's always marginalized identities- which i understand Why, but it feels very othering to me (and again. Very exploitative as an advertisement). you would never list out "cishet able-bodied white man" as a character description to pat yourself on the back over. so why do it to everyone else? why insinuate that one is the "default" and the other one is "special"? (and when i say this i'm mainly talking about advertisements/marketing. i understand why people would specify about characters in descriptions with the plot, but i don't like to see an ad that's just "this book has gay people!" with nothing else)

which then leads me to my other point, which is that a lot of people treat "representation" as if it's "too hard." like "oh i don't know enough to write about that, i don't have that experience, etc" which is a fair way to feel! however… it's weird that people only say this about writing trans characters or characters of color. i'm writing a story right now with a character who is really into motorcycles. i personally do not know that much about motorcycles, so i researched what parts are what & what different kinds of models there are & what basic bike care looks like. i guarantee Most people will have to google something at some point in their writing process. so what's the problem? it also, again, feels very othering when authors treat certain groups of people as "impossible" to write, "too hard" to understand. they are just.. people. you write them as a person. and then you figure out the rest later.

and i think part of the refusal or fear to write something outside of your experience is because of the way representation is treated as So Special. these characters are So Special that they aren't allowed to be anything other than "representation." they're Not allowed to be characters with complex emotions and interesting motivations, they have to just be Trans or Gay or Disabled or whatever. they're not allowed to be people. which means, at the end of the day, we loop right back around to where we were at the start….

there is bad representation. there are depictions of certain marginalized people that are harmful and that are damaging, i'm not trying to minimize that or argue against it at all, in fact we should all be mindful of that while writing and reading. but i also think it's possible to swing too far in the opposite direction as well and put certain groups of people on a pedestal and not allow them to do anything at all but be Perfect Representation, if that makes sense.

[a-bucket-in-the-void]

guys

i’ve currently got 2/7 of the school stuff i need to get done finished

progress people progress

[fideidefenswhore]

When an outbreak of plague hit, Charles [V] anxiously suggested that Mendoza drop what he was doing and flee for safer areas; Chapuys had never received such concern. Mendoza had planned to depart England by the end of August, which he anticipated with unconcealed joy. He had asked for a recall. Charles not only immediately granted Mendoza's request (whereas he had refused to do so for Chapuys), but also sent money to cover any debts he had incurred.

Inside the Tudor Court, Lauren Mackay

[justanotherfanartist]

i got the kind of autism where I make theme songs and leitmotifs for my characters that I haven’t written anything about but have a complete fuzzy image of in my head

[sensitivedead]

getting food with a friend i havent spoken to since 2016

wish me lurk

[llycaons]

bad rated e fanfics, even the less odious, will make wwx soooo boring too like he's just some dude who's...kind of shy, sometimes? he likes big tall mean guys with huge hands? he's annoying...sometimes? he loves his sister. thats his only personality traits IF WE'RE LUCKY. the better ones won't be weird about him bottoming and may even incorporate his intelligence and passion for justice but none of them seem to actually capture him...like wwx has a lot of vulnerabilities and past traumas but he is not, by and large, a vulnerable or sensitive person in his day to day life or his regular interactions w strangers. he's like...genuinely quite confident and funny and cheeky and playful and even a little mean sometimes, or defensive and cutting and cold. and ig if its his pov you do see more of that sensitivity but idk I feel like those fics really play it up and it just doesn't feel like him anymore...he's got a lot of layers to him

[cultivating-wildflowers]

mood for the morning: turning around for the second time because I forgot something else at the house. there are half a dozen tiny pumpkins rolling around in my front passenger seat.

[cherrylight]

hi....... so nervous on posting this even though i already posted one like it before?? anyway.... hi self insert time <3 (this time with colour!)

links to picrews i used: here + here !

hi sillies <3 i already talked about ashley before but this is what she looks like mostly!! her hair is blonde with pastel pink highlights, so kind of what the top image looks like? yeah :] (the other one didnt have it unfortunately and the blonde just looked like a really ugly yellow e_e)

ANYWAY SOME SILLY THINGS ABOUT HER (because i dont want to fully talk about the source shes a part of yet!)

♡ her style is both alt and cutesy! mostly alt though... im like both of these styles tbh.... so it makes me happy (or well cutesy inward... i cant express it openly T_T)

♡ she smiles but she is forever a :3 girly

♡ she looks very sweet and oblivious do not be FOOLED shes not... feral girl..... me real

♡ would it be funny to say she is the most cat lover to exist....... i love cats...... can we make it anymore obvious........ (shes a cat to me)

♡ probably a fan of the unknown.... will she tell you mysteries... conspiracies??? who knows........

idk what else to add here...... ummmm maybe ill rb this when i think of more info on her!! im just nervous Q_Q

[gar-a-ash]

Tassie flushed a rabbit from the field the other night and I saw her come out of the darkness completely on top of it trying to crush it into the ground while sprinting and the only reason it survived was because the dumbass forgot she had a frisbee in her mouth that she was refusing to drop (activated prey drive) and couldn't bite it past the frisbee she refused to lose. Tassie confirmed to outrun wild rabbits.

On the plus side high drive dog in activated prey drive and I only had to yell out to Leave It once before she sulked back to me I will fucking take that. I've never been as confident in Tassie's obedience vs Reese's so it is NICE to see it working.

[phereshift]

.

[fagatakonin]

And the most terrifying thing is that i could respect the life i've been given and use it to the fullest but it wouldn't be enough. You get no reward for respect you get no punishment for disrespect. Not in my world, it's needlessly convoluted without those set rules to make it make sense.