#RESULTS MAY VARY

[thrashz]

Boyfriwnd tip: Put sand in His pussy and in- wait how long does it

and in 6 months to several years you will get pearls

[spindle-and-nima]

He found himself a patch of sunlight to warm his braincells

[gl-saveme]

are we all flirting with congee now? is this the move? 🥣🤔

JiuMay in Petrichor Ep4 PimJan in Pluto Ep 3

[nonetoon]

Life hack ✨

[waywardangel-wilds]

peeta giving terrible relationship advice to delly (she's into someone in town idk who, but the person is very cool):

"why don't you ask if they wanna have some consensual platonic kissing? What? It works!"

"how about this: dont. say. anything. Nothing at all. Just share long and complicated longing looks for a few years. It really helps."

"Oh, I know! why don't you throw food at them? Katniss said it had a big impact on her opinion of me."

"Just hang out with them, duh. But without any talking. Just sit side by side. Katniss said it really gets her going."

[autismdurst]

IT IS SO HARD TO FIND EVERY PIC FROM THIS I'M GOING TO CRY

[starrie-eyed]

turns out all you need to cure a migraine is a dark room, weed, and cumming til you squirt all over your fingers

(they/them)

cishet men and minors dni

[guineapigposting]

How do I train hog to potty in a specific place?

ask

[kineticallyanywhere]

many of you already know why but I spend more time than any sane person should listening to dungeons and daddies. doing some work tonight and solidifying these tips for dndads listeners who are continuity-trackers. To be specific, which players to actually map your flexible dndads “canon” off of:

Beth: very consistent about her own characters’ details. might wobble in regards to others’ or world continuity at large. safe to map off of.

Anthony: typically your best bet on world building details, starts to slip on things that aren’t particularly relevant to the overall plot, like an NPC that’s only barely a character at the time, or a specific game rule that’s funnier/better to have forgotten about anyway. very safe to map off of.

Will: most likely to be accurate about an obscure detail from 5 sessions ago. also might be plotting something directly in front of your face. pay attention to him, but also pay attention to where his plan clearly started from because anything before that is fair game to be lightly ret-conned for the sake of something better. generally safe but watch yourself.

Freddie: this man is making it up as he goes do not trust. unless it’s about an obscure fact he read on wikipedia or watched a youtube video about, then write that down.

Matt: This man knows continuity in vibe form only. Is his character role play impeccable? Yes. Can he keep his anecdotes about those characters from contradicting? Absolutely not. Disregard unless backed by a secondary source.

[doubledeadstudio]

I just had a breast reduction yesterday and I'm in need of some serious comfort, can I please have your ocs react to their partner getting a breast reduction and helping them?

Of course, anon! Hope it cheers you up

Grete would have been with you every step of the way, from the appointment to the hospital. If you're with Crux, he would've driven you there, and likely waived the fee. If you're with Black, Crux would still waive the fee, but Black would've driven you, and he'll camp out in your living room during the first few days to help around.

[victoriadallonfan]

Just a heads up that if you have not upgraded your tumblr package to VictoriaDallonFanPrime, then starting 1/27/23 you will be exposed to advertisements during your favorite VictoriaDallonFan posts!

We appreciate your loyal dedication to all things Ward, Victoria, and VictoriaDallonFan ♥️

[gender-thief2]

if you’re genderfluid and need to speedrun figuring out what gender/pronouns you wanna use for the day what works for me sometimes is typing out a sentence (or just internally thinking could work) about yourself and labeling yourself as something (like “(your name) is a fun guy and he likes to draw”) and seeing if it makes you uncomfortable or euphoric

[deadbodiesevery-where]

Idc how many people say how bad this song is, i love it so much

[spintrick]

The thing they don't tell you about top surgery is that suddenly you're not suicidal anymore

[sensitivesicko]

I made puppy chow! Now who's gonna be a good puppy and earn a treat?

[bil-daddy]

I don't suppose you have any advice on how to beat insomnia do you? You seem like a nice, upright fella. Maybe you can help. I stay up all night looking at Good Omens stuff on Tumblr. It's a problem. Sort of.

I'm going to overlook you calling me a four letter word (n-i-c-e), and still try to help you, anon.

There's lots of advice for beating insomnia; turning off screens an hour before bed, not consuming any caffeine after 3pm, taking melatonin, doing at least thirty minutes of exercise then relaxing with a shower. But you've probably already heard all that before, and likely tried at least some of it.

So here's what I'll recommend. If Good Omens is keeping you up, then let Good Omens put you to sleep.

Put away your phone/ tablet/ computer, turn out the lights, and lie in bed thinking about Good Omens. Only Good Omens. Do not let your mind wander. If you start to think about anything else, get your thoughts back on the Good Omens track.

Close your eyes and start visualizing/retelling yourself the plot, scene by scene, in order. Or the plot of your favorite fic. (You could also plot your own fic, but that's more likely to keep you up writing all night.) If you get distracted or lost, start over from the beginning. (Which in this case is the Beginning with a Capital B)

The objective is to focus linearly on the plot, blocking out all other thoughts, until you fall asleep. It's like counting sheep (or goats), except more tailored (or cobblered) to your interest. Interesting enough you can focus on it, but not exciting or new to keep you awake.

It works for me (sometimes) Can't promise it'll work for you, but give it a try if you like. Hope it helps.

And, of course, have an ox rib (platonic) (just don't eat it right before bed)