#Procyon Pudding

[discoveringasterismsart]

Fat Raccoon; digital illustration

[rapiersworld]

[kamuinoyume]

Origami sisters vs  Procyon Pudding

[postorbital]

You are beautiful like math flowers; shimmering quanta in gravity pudding; luminous decay

student translation of Procyon B parenthood vows, third stanza

[kurayamineko]

Team Altair Torte Team Coconut Vega Team Procyon Pudding Team Biscuit Sirius

[omgwtfdondake]

66 things about Schoolgirl Strikers 01

THE TINY MASCOT TURNS INTO A ROOMBA?!???

Okay what the fuck is that.  Is that a pokemon?

Is this just like... Pokemon Go gone wrong?

Holy shit, right off the bat... loli with a gun..

Wow... surprisingly agile legged-tadpole...

Eoooyoowhoa okay, girl with the punchy gauntlets is already my fav-

Aaaand she gets swatted aw-

WAIT WAIT WAIT... HOOOOOLD UP A MINUTE Is that Miyuki?  IS THAT MIYUKI SAWASHI-

WHY DID NOBODY TELL ME MIYUKI WAS VOICING IN THIS?!??

Oh no... why u not throw pokeball Tsubame?

AJJNNGNHHHNN Miyuki no... And by that I mean Miyuki yesssssss-

Yo... Towel.. TOWEL.

DON’T RUN YOU’RE GONNA SLIP AND KILL YOURSELVES-

...Goryoukan Academy campus reminds me of the Pentagon.

Why... Why is there a sword- what-

OH NO THE TEACHER IS PRETTY-

Of course she’s a volleyball star.  BECAUSE OF COURSE SHE’S A FUCKIN’ VOLLEYBALL STARRR FNSO:DJFN:SIDvmiyukistopit-

Holy shit... Is that hyperactive Kana Hanazawa dude...

Pls... Pls stop waving around a sword in the staff room...

Oh no... not the seven mysteri-- You don’t just make up these-- Well I  mean... I guess you could-

How even does teach’s hair-bun thing work?

Whoa lookit that hallway...

Ah.  I see the J.C. Staff animation now.

What a pretty fuckin’ hallway though...

That’s... That’s not how the seven mysteries work Yuumi...

Oh no... Yuumi is a precious cinnamon roll.  Pls break her.

Great, now I want curry-bread.  Damnit.

One does not simply launch a sneak surprise attack on Io-san.

Ahhhhhh LOOKIT HER!!

Also, what’s with all the varying uniforms...? What is this Kindred Spirits?  Where is this? Shirojo?

Of course she’s popular.  BECAUSE OF COURSE SHE IS-

Oh my god, Yuumi you fuckin’ nerd.

Yurei-chin.

Oh no.. Io-chan is a scared puppy.  Scare her more.

Whoa... J.C. Suddenly Shaft-ing all over the place...

Where have I heard Tsubame’s voice before?

Lookit the heights tho~

Wait... she doesn’t attend scho- what?

Oh no... Zordon’s calling..

WHOA WHAT A ROOM?!

HOLY WOW THERE’S MORE?!  THERE ARE SQUADS?!?

Of course, there’s the tiny mascot-

WHO ARE YOU... COOL BEAUTY?!

Tierra-sensei.

Pro... P... Procyon Pudding... Wh-wha... what now?

HOLY FUCK SHE HAS A MINIGUN-

HOLY FUCK SHE’S IN A MAID OUTFIT

THAT’S A FUCKING ROCKET-LAUNCHER

Y- they... they’re all in maid outfits... jfc the squads have themes-

GRATUITOUS BUTT SHOT.

CLOTHING DOES NOT WORK THAT WAY TIERRA-SENSEI

THE TINY MASCOT TURNS INTO A ROOMBA?!???

Please don’t let the cat walk all over the computer console-

She doesn’t know where she came from?!?? I... What?!??

GET THE CAT OFF THE CONSOLE-

Is... Is that supposed to be a pep-talk? rofl.

What an extravagant room.

OOP Transformation scene-

Okay... not... as fanservice-y as it could have been, I guess.

IO’S COLOR IS PURPLEEEEEE~

That is a very large crystal.

Up, up and awaaaay~

EVEN GIANTER TADPOLE!

Oh damn! Sniper- wait what even are you wearing girl?

What... what is this... what are... bi... bikini- Oh god.

I... combat kni-  WHAT THE FUCK WHAT THE FU- Holy shit man.

whatdidIjustwatch? ;.....and when’s the next ep?

[deltaengineering]

Winter Anime 2017 Part 1: United States of Whatever

Last season was pretty decent, now get hype for Rakugo II and LWA za Teevee. But not today. Not today.

Akiba's Trip The Animation

Akiba’s Trip is a wacky video game series about running around Akihabara and slicing the clothes off zombies, the second of which for some unfathomable reason got a Western release and was mainly beloved by YouTubers reacting to how weird it is. Too bad that if you sample a lot of anime every season, the weirdness barely registers because I’ve definitely seen otaku culture in-jokes and fanservice before. That vague concept is also all this anime has to do with the games; it’s not an adaptation, which means it doesn’t feature the second main draw of Akiba’s Trip 2, which are its Akio Watanabe character designs. Oops. In any case, this is an action-comedy in which the comedy is your basic otaku references and the action is actually... kind of decent? The  animation surprisingly cartoony, dynamic and expressive, reminiscent of Trigger’s style. But while that’s a nice surprise, I’m also suspecting that this is the type of show that can’t keep it up for long. And even if it could, it would still mainly be an unfunny fanservice comedy.

Fuuka

I’ve been hearing some things about what happens later in the storyline of the Fuuka manga, and that sounds quite amusing (in a trainwreck way). But that’s probably not happening anytime soon, so if you want to laugh at incredibly stupid melodrama you have to watch a bunch of the most basic, unimaginative romance anime I’ve ever seen first. There is simply nothing interesting about Fuuka at all: It’s a pile of standard romance clichees of the shounen variety (which you can recognize by its weird insistence on making panty shots a plot point) wherein a bland main character meets an equally bland manic pixie dream girl. At least it’s not a harem, but as much as I hate to say it, at least that might have added some variety. It’ll be very easy to forget about this until the webms of the one scene that everyone is waiting for roll around.

Minami Kamakura Koukou Joshi Jitensha-bu

I hope the Kamakura tourism board is bankrolling this one, because if they aren’t they’re getting something for free. Not a lot, mind you; this is just last season’s most forgettable show Long Riders again, only this time with prettier backgrounds of scenic Kamakura (maybe the tourism board is just paying for those). The moeblobs and the cycling didn’t get any better looking though, or any more interesting. Even the bizarre notion of teenagers not knowing how a bicycle works is still around. So it’s half tourism infomercial, half cycling infomercial (literally so in the live-action postcredits), and all dull.

Schoolgirl Strikers - Animation Channel

If dull girls doing dull bicycle things isn’t quite the right brand of dull, check out Schoolgirl Strikers! Yes, replace the slice-of-boring with unimaginative action and you get this, an anime based on some mobile game that’s only memorable for three things: being very proud of its ugly 3D backgrounds, the transformation sequences being brightness limited to the point of me almost not being able to even tell what’s happening, and its action girl teams being named in the “Dessert Star” format, i.e. Pudding Procyon, Coconut Vega and so on. On top of being peak low-effort game ad, it also lacks anything notably bad - even the action’s borderline decent, but still completely unengaging. So it’s the worst kind of anime to write about, just depressingly subpar in every way.

Youjo Senki

Finally we get something not completely forgettable, but guess what, this doesn’t mean Youjo Senki is good. If you watched Izetta and thought “yes this off-brand Europe is great, but somehow it would be better if the main character was a loli, a Russian Nazi, and also me”, you’re in luck. One thing it maybe has over Izetta is that it is strangely disinterested in the usual miliota pandering; you won’t find many depictions or references of your favorite military hardware here. Youjo Senki ain’t got time for that because it’s mostly interested in something else. Namely, killing people a lot, and that explains why it’s not set in the glorious 40s but in the 20s, where WW1-style trench warfare can add just that little bit of extra grimness. It’s that really creepy niche of “war is hell, but still totally rad if you’re the one doing the killing” that MuvLuv excels in. Then add in a bit of Hellsing as well, in that the main character is  supposed to be pure evil but also way awesome (by making absurd evil faces). And finally, a big part of the bullshit isn’t even revealed in the first episode, but since it’s in every synopsis I can make fun of it nonetheless: It is, of course, an isekai story, Tanya is actually a reborn Japanese salaryman. So that’s a lot of crap even on the concept stage, and Youjo Senki doesn’t even remotely make it work in practice. It’s bewilderingly ugly; Tanya at least has her screencappable facial expressions, but her good-natured squadmate Victoria consistently looks like a bad fanart of the frog girl from HeroAca crossed with the infamous E7 Rentonface meme. Apart from those two it’s just brown, the most mature of colors. And the story of the first episode is just Tanya being evil and murdering Frenchmen with magical bullets, then being evil some more and murdering a few of her own guys for good measure. Because she just doesn’t give a FUCK, you see. In short, edgemasters who loved Drifters last season can move on right to this one, everyone else should stay far away.

Masamune-kun no Revenge

It’s tough to top Youjo Senki in being distasteful, but Masamune-kun at least tries; it’s about a guy who used to be fat and thus got rejected by the tsundere school council president long ago, but worked out to become a popular ikemen and now wants to win her over, then drop her... for revenge. Well, it’s a character motivation, I suppose. I would assume that this becomes genuine attraction as the series goes on, but it’s still a pretty shitty gimmick to start off on. But hey, shoujo romance does worse all the fucking time, and apart from that it’s surprisingly not the worst - just a romantic comedy that is neither very romantic nor very funny. I know that there are some hilarious/idiotic plot twists in the future here as well, but while not being quite as utterly bland as Fuuka, it doesn’t seem worth it either. At least it’s fairly well made; looks good, comedic timing is present and in particular it has some nice use of music. Still, it’s just your usual shounen romance with a gimmick that purports to subvert something and ends up being extreme wish-fulfilment anyway, and the characters are not nearly endearing enough to make it work on a pure relationship level.

[hyperfixations-station]

Coconut Vega, Procyon Pudding, and Altair Torte

Who came up with these names anyway?

Schoolgirl Strikers: Animation Channel

[kamuinoyume]

Team  Procyon Pudding

[kamuinoyume]

All the teams introduced in episode 2.