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rise-my-angel · 2 months ago

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Heart of the Great Wolf

Then Came the Explosion

Pairing : Jon Snow x F!Baratheon!Reader, Robb Stark x F!Baratheon!Reader (one sided)

Length: 25.3k

Warnings: modern!au, angst/hurt comfort, talk of doctors/medical care, severe anxiety, panic attacks, mentions of pregnancy, accusations of baby trapping/stealthing, smut, oral (m and f receiving), p in v, breeding kink

Notes: I'm so sorry how late this is coming out, and I know I think we all saw this coming, but hopefully it was worth it? Previous Chapter Here, Series Masterlist Here

You could hear very little save for the tapping of your nails against the chair your arm sat along. The material mostly soft save for the wooden edges which your hand naturally lay at the end of, and despite all of the noise around you, only that constant tapping filled your head. One nail, then the other, all following in quick succession almost replacing the ticking of the clock above the reception desk. If you let your mind refocus into the moment, you might have heard the subsequent but more frequent clacking of the keyboard where the woman sat, or the idle chatter along the hall just beyond your sight as you waited your turn.

The Starks had always insisted you use their private medical care since it would be a lot quicker and more efficient, but you had always felt guilty at the idea. As if you were taking advantage of their kindness, and as a result, you stubbornly had gone on your own to the public service. Normally, families descended from highborn nobility had smaller private medical matters usually performed primarily by a Maester of the Citadel. More personal and more specially trained, you saw the allure in using such a thing for yourself, but felt bad at the idea when you weren’t family.

Your own family had them, split between the two places the Baratheons lived. On your childhood island home of Dragonstone, you had grown up with Maester Cressen, and now the much younger Maester Pylos. In Kings Landing, there was Grand Maester Pycelle, whom you did not particularly trust but when you lived there, you made do. But here, you weren’t a Stark, and it didn’t feel appropriate to use things which were there specifically for them. A regular doctor was fine, you didn’t have much urgency in your issues anyways.

Fatigue, headaches, a general ill feeling in your stomach almost like nausea. Looking at your medical history, it wasn’t unusual to start with more direct tests considering how often your mother had fallen ill during her lifetime. So far you nor Shireen had issues as rampant as hers, but it was a possibility. Now you had to merely sit in the waiting room to be called, only to likely be told exactly what you suspected.

Find ways to make your life less stressful and the symptoms would eventually go way on their own.

Your eyes finally directed themselves down to your phone as the lockscreen lit itself up. Your brows narrowing ever so slightly as you unlocked it. You must have missed a few scattered messages rolling in, as you had a fair few unread. Two from Theon confirming he’d come pick you up on his way back from work, one from Margaery which preview was cut off but you no doubt could tell by the start of it she had some piece of gossip she needed to share with someone. And the newest which caught your attention being from Jon, confirming he was coming home from a long multi day shift in two nights.

Glancing up as if to check to see if he’d somehow know you were lying, you merely responded with an answer that you were eagerly awaiting his return, as sitting at home was growing boring without him. You knew if you told him you were at the doctors, he’d worry. You hadn’t told him you went to see them the first time a few days ago, so you thought if it was just stress, you had no wish to worry him for nothing now. Luckily, you knew he was north of the Wall at that moment, it made not including many details about your day simple as he had not much in the way of time to even look at his phone outside of the dead of night before sleeping.

Part of you was frustrated, it started about a week after coming home from Dickon Tarly’s wedding and no one else seemed to have felt sick. Meaning if you caught something down south, only you caught it, which figured. Just your luck, it seemed.

Otherwise, it had been hard to gauge how everything was. Things between Jon and Robb had gotten no better. Even Theon had picked up on it to the point it was frustrating him. Only he knew you were going to the doctors, and he offered to pick you up today so that you didn’t need to explain where you went at such an odd part of the afternoon. One night things had gone not well. Neither of you knew who started it, but by the time you and Theon noticed, Robb and Jon were standing in the kitchen nearly yelling at each other about something you couldn’t even figure out.

When they noticed you were there, before they could apologize and explain Theon came barrelling down the hall completely fed up and all but dragged you out the door saying the two of them could fend for themselves for dinner, while he and you enjoyed a night out in some peace and quiet for once. A small diner you both had not been to in many years, but as Theon put it, you seemed to be in need of some good Northern comfort food. The jest starting immediately that you were terrible at making comfort food because everything in the south was different then in the North food wise. He wasn’t wrong.

You and him hadn’t spent much time together in a while with everything else going on, but it was a breath of fresh air. Both literally and figuratively. Getting you out of the house was tricky sometimes now that you could work remotely. The guys would get creative in finding ways to get you outside, but it was always nice. Also though, you and him hadn’t spent much time just the two of you away from the Starks for a while. It was nice, a kinship only you both could understand.

While Theon had spent much more time with them as he lived there for a number of years, you both knew what it was like to be outsiders. To be so close to them, but not one of them. It made you both some days feel like you were only looking into their live, not being part of it. You hadn’t grown up with any siblings until Shireen, but by the time she was born you were already a girl of twelve. Theon was the closest thing you had to a brother, and despite having a sister of his own, you were more of a sister to him then Yara was.

It was there you let out your frustrations and nerves. That this all stemmed from the night Robb had to come get you from a bar, so drunk you passed out in his car before even leaving the parking lot and it only got worse from there. He held back what he thought for a while, before asking what Jon had said and you told him the truth. That Robb was just looking out for you. Only, you also told him what you still hadn’t told Jon about. The evening you two got back from the wedding. When Robb confronted you and what he said.

Normally, you’d expect Theon to want to jump on this opportunity to say the first snarky thing on his mind but he had been surprisingly restrained. Saying he’d pay more attention too and see if he could get out from either of them what the real issue was. You had muttered that it was your fault they were fighting, but Theon only shrugged as he sipped his coffee. “Probably, doesn’t mean you have to blame yourself though.”

But, he had agreed to help in what ways he could, since he too suffered from the tension in the house.

Eyes flying up as your name was called, you swiftly tucked your phone away before following the nurse into the room so you could once more, wait for the doctor, only now in a smaller more quiet room. By the time he entered the room, closing the door behind him he went through all of the usual pleasantries before getting to it. “So, I called you in to discuss the results of your blood test, and what next steps will mean.”

Your heart sunk a bit before raising in it’s pace, sitting up straighter you felt your face steel for what was to come. “You found something..”

While your voice was low and worrisome, his was far more passive and unperturbed for a man about to tell you how sick you really were. He looked at your chart on his computer screen with almost a chuckle, “That we certainly did.” You stammered in silence looking to him for an elaboration, only the next thing he said wasn’t actually a diagnosis. It was a question.

One that had you pause, your body freezing in place as everything yet nothing ran through your mind at that implication. You were fairly certain for the remainder of the appointment, you hardly heard him say a thing through the sudden ringing in your ears as nerves exploded inside of you to something suddenly more in panic then if you were terribly ill.

“Tell me, when was the last time you menstruated?”

You almost slammed the car door so hard Theon actually spoke up by the time you got inside. “Hey, don’t take it out on the car.” Your eyes only glared to the side as you sat back, your head landing with a light thud against the headrest behind you as your eyes closed, a sigh leaving you. “Go that well?”

It came out so naturally that perhaps it hadn’t quite sunk in yet, the truth. So your mouth lied without second thought. “He told me it’s only stress.” Theon begun to drive, asking isn’t that what you suspected the problem was. Presuming he’d catch your nod in the side of his vision it was quiet in the car only filled the silence by his music. Asking he thought you’d prefer that to be the answer, your shrugged with a distant mumble as your mind worked quickly to seek out the words. “I thought so too, but apparently when the answer to how do I feel better is just, relax more, turns out that isn’t such a relaxing answer.”

Your head lulled to the side as you looked out the window as things passed you by. Something caught in your throat preventing you from even attempting to make conversation, but luckily your energy seemed to be caught on by Theon. Biting your tongue to keep your face still, you felt a warm sensation in your face that you knew too well could boil over. A watering wanting to fill your eyes but you did nothing to try and wipe away them before they fell should Theon glance over and notice. You’d have to keep them open and hope they dried up even though your heart begun to race more as the silence got to you.

One thing then another, only now you knew no one was responsible but you. This time, the issue was your fault and there was no denying that. The doctor asked you question after question to make sure you were on the same page. Finally narrowing it down to how this happened you came upon one night and how that just so happened to be it. Your heart picked up more the second the thought came into your head. You’d have to find a way to explain it, one that didn’t make you look and sound so horrid.

It would look planned. With what you said in the car, what happened before it all to cause what you said and then this? You knew how it was about to come across and the answer was only one road, that it was about to be horrible and no one could blame any but you for it.

Pulling off of the main road which led down a narrow stretch with woods and hills surrounding it, eventually it would lead down to the Stark property. Theon’s voice pulling you back into the present as he spoke with a tinge of annoyance as if he had been trying to get your attention for a while. A rather unbecoming, “What?” Came from you as you looked at him.

Almost rolling his eyes in jest he elaborated his point but slower as if this too was the second time he’d said it. “I didn’t tell Robb. That you went to the doctors, in case you were worried he planned to interrogate you the minute you walked in the door.” Asking what he did say, it was an easy enough explanation to go off of. “Told him you were out somewhere with Margaery and I’d pick you up on my way to make it easier for you.” Thanking him he nodded as the main houses begun to come into sight.

Just off to the side, you could see the expansive back yard of the Stark house, with three direwolves running and barking and jumping all over the other as following you could see Bran, Arya, and Rickon all roughhousing together as the wolves mimicked their behaviour. Just barley you could see someone sitting on the back porch you could only assume was Catelyn ensuring they didn’t get too carried away with everything.

Theons car passing by was enough to distract Bran enough to turn around and look, only to be jumped on the back by Arya who no doubt was yelling not to let his guard down. Just calm and peace, and the further away you drove towards home you felt anxious again. The papers in your bag were overwhelmingly heavy. As if they were replaced with steel trying to bare your person down into the ground to disappear forever.

Heart picking up again you felt nervous. You shouldn’t have put them there. Now you’d have to get them from where your bag normally stayed at the front hall, and have no one see them so you could hide them. At least with Jon gone, you could hide them once you got into his room where you knew he didn’t go and pry around but you needed to get passed both of them without them asking about it, because as of yet, you had no explanation.

Robb naturally was already home. His car parked in the driveway, and you knew you couldn’t go in there with this feeling so painted on your face. Each little movement felt as if it was taking forever. Your limbs and muscles functioning in slow motion. Even the cracks or creaks were different, a sharp echo in your ears you wanted to hide from but couldn’t. As you stepped out onto the pavement, you closed the door with much more slowness then before, only to catch Theons attention as he smirked. “See? Now you’re treating her with respect.” Nodding, you fiddled with your bag for a second as he noticed. “You coming in, Baratheon?”

Looking into your bag where the papers were, you also spotted your phone, giving you perhaps a chance for an out. You didn’t need to hide the papers inside if you did so now, alone. Nodding you pulled your phone out, “In a minute, ironically Margaerys been messaging me all afternoon.” The implication picked up on, Theon just nodded and went inside the house.

Feigning the ruse, you turned to pace as you typed away on your phone despite the screen clearly being off. Naturally standing so your back faced the front windows, you put the phone back before carefully sneaking the papers out from their spot. Folding them even further, you took only a moment to slyly tuck them into your pocket, stored away and with your shirt just being on the edge of too long, it hid any sign something was in there.

The house was warm when you got inside, a heavy heat that seemed to emminate from the kitchen as you hung everything up. You’d have to pass the kitchen to get to Jons room, and they’d both notice you scurrying away if you tried to hide it now. Sighing deeply, you told yourself it was fine. Jon wasn’t here for another two nights, you could hide it later with no reason to look over your shoulder. They were hidden in your pockets, not visible under your shirt. Neither would notice.

Your palm grasping the edge of the door frame, you slowly slid your way half way into the room. Leaning against where the back of your hand sat outwards, you watched the two of them move around the kitchen like normal. It was normal, everything was normal. It was only you and your mind that wasn’t normal. Swallowing, you tried to breathe slowly and deeply only to be hit with something more like that ill feeling again.

Nothing smelled bad, in fact it all smelled rather delicious, but it was strong. Almost too strong as it hit your senses and almost had you wavering on two feet grasping at the edge of the frame tighter. A voice called your name, your eyes blinking before realizing Robb was standing in front of you. A bemused grin as if he watched it all play out, “You alright there? The Tyrells tire you out that much?”

Your smirk played off more in an exhausted manner then overwhelmed. A huff of a laugh trapped in your chest as you nodded a bit. “You try spending hours with her, being shoved into the fitting rooms with the kinds of clothes she picks out.” Only laughing, he knew what you meant in his own way as he nodded for you to move more inside with him. “What are you making this time?”

Gesturing for you to go look yourself, you slowly pulled the lid off the pot and once more that smell was enticing yet overwhelming. As if letting the fumes get to you, you stood there for a moment trying to allow the feeling to pass, only doing so when you could slightly hear Robb starting to speak again. Putting it back down as you turned to suddenly grab the things to set the table. “It looks great.”

Luckily, it did and such a phrasing was sufficient to get through it. Still the papers weighed you down, even as you managed to push passed whatever was riling up your sense of smell you managed to eat as normal. Almost ironically, not as hungry as you should’ve been. Your mood was noticeably more off, but while Robb didn’t know why, neither really did Theon. And both of them seemingly shared a glance trying to get you to open up, and they thought they knew just how as to what was on your mind really.

“Your uncle was here today.” Your head looking up at Robb like it was yanked upwards from your food with narrowed eyes as he smiled a little, “I mean at the office.”

Asking what he was there for, Robb only raised an eyebrow at you before your face dropped, as did your voice turn rather flat. “Oh.”

Nodding, he tried to keep it as diplomatically as possible. “Her travels haven’t been going very well. She tried to go through the Riverlands next, which didn’t work out either.” You and Theon shared a knowing glance. Robb’s mother Catelyn was born a Tully, the family which was in control of the Riverlands and despite the issue surrounding Jon, no doubt it was simply the effect it had on you and the family as a result that likely had words whispering between Catelyn and her brother Edmure. Robb continuing between bites. “The Vale wouldn’t let her in, but..”

The Vale wasn’t letting anyone in. Catelyns sister Lysa was married to Jon Arryn, the man in control of the Vale. He had some years ago passed from a fever, and Lysa took herself and their only son Robin there instead of moving back to Riverrun. People said that she was fresh widowed, she didn’t know what she was doing or saying, but it had been years since then and still the acted as if the Vale was a kingdom she could lock away from the rest of the world.

Your face was scrunched up when Theon chimed in, “Trying to figure out where she would go next?” Nodding, you still came up blank, knowing that there was not much that would be easy for her campaign. “Well, she can’t do the Crownlands or the Stormlands, meaning the easiest pick would be the Reach.”

You rose a brow, looking from Theon to Robb with a doubt. “And who is she hoping to win over there exactly?” The Tyrells were the main house of the Reach, but there were other houses there with none to favourable of a history towards her family. Even centuries later.

Robb shrugged, “If we’re lucky, she’ll win none of them and eventually figure out she should go home.” Theon commenting without hesitation that never seeing her face again would be too soon. You felt both men looking to you, but you didn’t comment on it. Your face impassive despite the feeling heavy in your stomach. Asking in more of a mumble what your uncle was around the North for, Robb recalled he did have a point bringing that up. “He asked about you.”

Your eyes shot up, narrowed and suddenly suspicious. “Me?” Affirming yes, your next answer was just as short and to the blunt point. “Why?”

“He wanted to know how you were doing. After everything.” It was lucky who was speaking to you, as your shortness continued and yet did not bother them as you asked why once more and Robb chuckled lightly into his drink for a moment before setting it down. “You and him apparently haven’t spoken since then, he was worried. Don’t worry I didn’t tell him anything bad.” Answering you before you could even get the question out.

Sighing, you leaned back in your chair, looking to the side at the wall full of calendars and various photos, notes and more. Looking back your face dropped a little in a bit of defeat. “Well, at least one of them is interested in speaking to me again.”

They both knew without needing to be told.

Since everything that happened with Daenerys Targaryean, Robert and your father Stannis had stopped speaking to you. Renly tried to assure you it was under the guise of being busy, but you knew better. Stannis was disappointed, and Robert was angry. It was the Baratheon way, having the most extreme reaction to whatever emotions come their way.

You hadn’t heard from them in the three months since that week. You were lucky however, with your father in Kings Landing with your uncles, your mother had been able to stay on Dragonstone with your sister Shireen, which meant that she allowed her to call you as much as she wanted on the phone. Many nights your mother gave her phone over to Shireen and late into working you’d be at the desk with your phone tucked between your ear and shoulder as you typed away.

Books, it always started with the books. What she was reading, what it was about, what her favourite parts were. A student of history your baby sister was. Sometimes she’d tell you the name of the book, and despite being long since familiar with it’s contents, you’d always ask what it was about so she had an excuse to tell you all about what she learned. If you had one thing on your side, it was that your mother wasn’t so attached to their anger that she deprived Shireen and you from speaking.

But, Robert wanting to possibly mend that bridge didn’t mean you’d be able to see Shireen again so easily. Baratheons did not forgive their grudges so quickly, and your father was certainly a staple of such behaviour with you. A small shift in your seat, and you felt the papers shift. Your heart almost skipped a beat as you thought of it, the prospect of having to tell him. Or your mother. You weren’t even-

They were going to disown you, in the best case scenario.

“It’s something at least.” Meeting Theons gaze, you knew you had no right to complain in front of him about distant family. How long it had been since he spoke to any of his own beyond possibly a few exchanged words online with Yara? You’d wager on a very, very long time. He has lost his interest in rekindling that the last time he tried visiting home. “Renly is still speaking to you, and Gendry.”

Robb’s eyes stopped and flickered up at that. Your face twisting knowing what he was thinking, leaning forward your elbow rested on the table pointing to him in a sudden stern warning. “Don’t start.” About to speak, you cut him off with wider eyes. “I know what you’re about to say, Stark. Don’t say it.”

Now tied in a stare off, you knew exactly how many things were begging to leave his mouth but your own gaze was quite a challenge as you didn’t even blink as long as he was on the edge of saying something. Tilting his head almost in relenting, you did so too, moving back to your food before you heard him mutter, “Could at least tell him to get some manners.”

Your head rose up with the most flat expression on your face you could naturally summon. “Robb.” Only for him to say your name back. You were not having this back and forth again, not even as a joke, you didn’t have the energy at that point. But he left it be, for your sake.

You weren’t doing as good of a job at hiding as you thought you were. Making your way to Jons room, Robb gently grabbed your arm. Turning you around to face him, he left it there but now sat in a more comforting manner as he toyed it up to the hair sitting draped over your shoulder. “Are you sure you’re alright? Ever since you came home you’ve barley been paying attention.”

Nodding, you swallowed down the nerves desperate to fling itself back up into the main spotlight. “I’m just tired, thats all. Haven’t slept well these past few nights.” He looked as if he didn’t believe you.

His brows furrowed, something unsure deep in the blue of his eyes and was silent for far too long. The hand by your shoulder reached up, cupping your cheek as he leaned down to meet your own eye level with a serious tone but coming out with a comforting warmth. “Anything thats wrong, or you just want to get off your chest. Anything you might need, you know you can always come to me, right?”

Nodding, you felt the most calm you had. Just one persons reassurance that even if things weren’t okay, you had him. Grasping gentle at the wrist by your face, you let your thumb naturally sit against his pulse, something more strained and notably held back but soft enough you hoped Robb would not push yet. “I know, and I will. I promise.”

The bright smile came over his face, finally a hint once more of the Robb before the mess from months ago. Pulling from your cheek, he shifted his hand to grab at yours, pressing a kiss to the back of it more formally before leaving it to pull you in by the back of your head, a more reassuring one pressed to your forehead before he nudged you in the opposite direction. “Go on, get some sleep.”

Feeling his eyes as you walked down the hall, for once it didn’t feel overbearing. For once, it felt like the only comfort you had, or will have coming forward. Closing the door with your back pressed against it when it clicked shut, your eyes too closed as your breath shook somewhat. The warm feeling returned to your face and the sting in your eyes was much more obvious.

Drawing near the tears wanted to fall, but you inhaled sharp and suddenly. Trying to keep the air in your lungs there for a moment as if to keep the water in you eyes at bay too. Your heart pounding in your chest as it had off and on all day long. It all overwhelmed you, and not even the quiet and comfort of Jons room brought it too you. He wasn’t in here, scrawled over his desk going over report after report. Ghost wasn’t happily laying up on the bed no matter how many times Jon had insisted he didn’t let Ghost nap there, only to always find white fur when washing the sheets. Not even a light was on. His window curtain still partially open, giving you enough light of the evening to find a dim lamp, only enough to illuminate part of the room in an orange glow.

Making your way to his bed, you sat carefully down on the edge, Leaning to pull off your shoes, sitting them neatly off to the side before you returned. Upright and stiff, your palms on your thighs you toyed a few fingertips over where the papers were. You’d have to pull them out, look at them, accept it. The weight almost too much to bare but you had felt ill at the doctors implication of what you could do about it. That was more then too much, a thought you never thought would even come to you as an option in a scenario yet it was there and it was awful. But so was the alternative.

Your eyes closed long enough to let out a deep sigh, pushing onto your feet you pulled the papers out. Unfolding them once, left in a half fold you hesitated. Looking over them, you could just barley begin to see the outline of the ink printed on the other side when you folded it back once more. You knew what was in it, you didn’t need to see it again. The weight in you rose up and up, finding it hard to ignore and suddenly you felt choked.

As if you were laying and someone pressed on your chest and all that was left to you was the need to cry out, except not for air, but cry out in a genuine tear. Hidden on your side of the closet, behind a few innocuous things was a small box. Not an actual lock on it, only one you flicked upwards but it was discreet.

Kneeling down you sat back on your shins as you sat the box in your lap. Pulling it’s lid upwards you had a litter of things inside. Most of which meant nothing to the causal onlooker. Trinkets and toys, all of which held meaning. Small chains with what almost looked like dog tags attached made of metal with four names etched into them, one each. Letters and what not, and you shoved it all aside to make room at the bottom. Sliding the letters underneath was when you broke.

Not a sob, but a cry quiet in the room let itself out finally. Were you not gripping the box tightly you’d have dropped it all together and the mess would’ve just symbolized how pathetic of a mess you had made things further. Hiding these way was not like hiding this. You couldn’t hide this forever, it was impossible. Part of you wanted to not care, to take the alternative route the doctor offered but you couldn’t do it. You couldn’t come to that conclusion it wasn’t how you were raised. Other women could and it would be perfectly fine, but you were not them and you didn’t have that strength to handle it.

Yet, you didn’t have the strength to handle this either. Slowly fighting through tears to not turn into audible cries you swallowed them down to close the box. Wiping your cheeks to no avail as more fell, but you stood regardless to hide everything back in it’s place. Looking as if no one had touched it what so ever as you closed it the closet door.

Turning back to the room, you had no plan for the night. Sitting out was a shirt of Jons you had full intentions of sleeping in, but now that seemed wrong too. As if you would taint it, if you hadn’t already. Instead, you didn’t change. Jeans on and all, you just climbed into the large and empty bed. The covers pulling up high over you like a child as you curled into yourself. No one was here, it didn’t matter if you cried yourself to sleep.

It was your fault, you ruined everything. It was too soon, and he’d hate you. He’d think you were ruining his life, or worse, trying to trap him with you. It was terrifying to think that, yet you saw the other side, that he’d look down on you. Think you of stupid for letting this happen by accident. It was your fault after all, you missed it that day. You didn’t even think of it until today that it would have an impact that you missed it.

It was too soon, and you weren’t ready and it didn’t matter if he was either, this was forcing him to be ready. Part of you couldn’t stop thinking about it. What the doctor had said. It was easy, painless. No harder then drinking a glass of water and yet it carried so much weight you felt panic at the sheer thought of it.

But what was worse as you finally fell asleep, your phone not even plugged in and light still on, you had continued to let the tears fall and stain your cheeks. You felt alone, and you knew when Jon came back, you’d feel alone for a very long time. Your only hope was that Robb was telling you the truth, that you could go to him for anything. Because knowing what was to come, if Robb too looked down on you for this as well, you didn’t know if you had a place here anymore.

You wouldn’t know where you’d have a place anywhere.

Jon was certain he was losing his mind. The job out north had been more of a struggle then they anticipated. It was supposed to be simple, make their way to Crasters Keep and sort of a dispute he had been having with the locals not too far south from in in Whitetree. Only to get there and Craster insisted on delaying any way to possibly go through proceedings without issue, because he was far more interested in attempting to argue and insult both Jon and Benjen.

It felt like hours the two men stood there trying to find any way for the man to listen to the point they couldn’t even make it back to the main town in time. Jon and Benjen both had to bribe the man after everything, to let them stay in the inn rooms upstairs if they were out at first light. Now, with what of Tormund and his men he brought settled in for the night, the two men of the Nights Watch found themselves settling in as well in the room.

Starting to undo the belt keeping his sword Longclaw strapped to his side, he didn’t quite put it down with as much care as he should’ve, catching Benjens attention from where he sat across the room on the other small bed. Or, bed was a generous word. More of a slightly nicer decorated cot. “You look exhausted.”

Jon only huffed half a smile with his back turned and a grunt, getting Benjen to grin at how much of an answer that truly was. Following up asking if everything back home was alright, Jon half turned to look at his uncle with a furrow in his brow. Benjen only stating he only looks this fed up when home was involved. Looking back, Jon didn’t quite answer for a minute before he sighed.

Looking up to the nothing on the wooden panel wall in front of him before turning to sit back on the edge of the cot. A hand reaching up to pinch at the bridge of his nose in thought as to how to sort through everything. “Just a lot going on.” Asking like what, Jon hesitated once more. It certainly was a lot, but what he even wanted to share was questionable. His uncle would sense a lie if he told one, so instead, he settled on a half truth. “Robb and I are trying to sort out some problems we’re having.”

Leaning more back against the wall with his legs outstretched, Benjen looked far more relaxed and willing to engage with the conversation then Jon was. “Ned and I could count on one hand how many times you two have had problems. Same with us. Must be serious if it’s bothering you this much.”

Jon didn’t really look at him, but nodded once as he took his gloves off, all the effort he was willing to put into anything before just wanting to pass out. Or try too. “We-” Cutting himself off with a sigh, Jon looked away even more so before peeking up to see Benjen nothing but calm and patient for Jon to find the right words to his point. Swallowing, he attempted to force through the block in his throat, only making it come out a bit more on the rough side as he said your name, Benjen only raising an eyebrow as Jon elaborated as little as he could get away with. “Something came up about her we disagree on, and both of us let it turn into a fight.”

That certainly was a half truth he know, but the ideas of it were in place. Though, Benjen only got more curious. “What kind of disagreement?” Head tilting when Jon didn’t answer right away, “Jon?”

Shaking his head, Jon hoped the look on his face was passively dismissive. “Nothing worth getting into.” Turning to plug his phone in, he could hear Benjen trying to pry him for more but Jon really did not want to dive into this. Already he regretted saying a word in the first place. “Really, it’s nothing.”

Only looking him over in a scrutiny, Benjen at least knew when not to push. “If you say so, but I’m always open to be complained at.” Jon knew his half smile didn’t reach his eyes but he glanced down to his phone.

Homescreen on display presently, it was a photo he loved. A rare instance he caught a photo of you when you didn’t realize. It was after a long shift not unlike the one he was on now. A brief snowstorm blew though, trapping them there for a few more days until the thaw. Ghost most of all had been on edge to go home. He loved being out in the far north with Jon, but he yearned to be home the way Jon did except the direwolf wasn’t afraid to show it.

Ghost hadn’t come in the house right away, side tracked by his own wolf siblings out in the main yards of the property that he had run over to play with. When he finally came into the house, it was as if he didn’t get out any extra energy at all out there. A loud but playful bark came out as the direwolf almost sprinted up to you. You had been smart enough to kneel down to his level not to be knocked over, and welcomed Ghost with a hug that he excitedly had leaned into. Your face wasn’t really visible from the angle but you were clearly hugging Ghost who was trying to smell you and lick you in greeting right back.

No doubt a similar greeting would follow this time, Craster always made Ghost stay locked up in the kennels when Jon and his men would stay the night and the direwolf hated it. But looking at his phone triggered another memory, one that happened the day before he left for the Wall a few days ago now.

Jon had taken you out for the afternoon into town. Finding a parking space, it was finally warm and sunny out which Jon wanted to take advantage of. You both needed a few things but nothing major or in particular, so you both wandered the town centre where most of the shops were. A store had caught your eye for just long enough you faltered in your steps, catching Jons attention right away. Looking back to you, he tried asking what it was, but you denied it was anything.

Instead, Jon kept you beside with with one arm when you tried to keep going, looking back to where you might’ve seen anything. He knew right away. A long, pretty dress sat in a shops window that was perfect for you. Looking back you tried to give him a glance that said it was fine, but Jon just grinned. Grabbing you by both arms and moving you in front of him to guide into the store. “Maybe I just want to see you in it, did you think of that?”

You rolled your eyes playfully, but the moment you both walked into the quaint shop, a brightly eyed older woman greeted you both enthusiastically. And only grew even more so when Jon right away asked if she had the dress in the window in your specific size to try on. “I certainly do. Let me get it from the back, just one moment.”

Eyes peeling over to Jon in a narrowed expression, he asked what in a knowing tone but playing innocent anyways. “I didn’t mean you had to-”

Cutting you off, he raised his eyebrows as he tried not to grin at what you were about to try and lie around saying. “Didn’t have to what? Buy you a pretty dress?” He knew you would feel silly saying anything against such a simplistic way to put it. Instead of giving you that chance, Jon pulled you more to him to press a kiss to the side of your head. “Let me treat you once in a while.” With the woman bringing the dress out, Jon all but silenced your protests that if was fine, and ushered you into the small fitting room. Knowing when you saw it on you, you’d have harder time telling him you didn’t want it.

As he waited, he felt eyes on him, turning to see the woman watching him almost waiting for something. “We have plenty of things for men as well.” Jon tried to assert he was alright, that his tastes were more simple, she just gave him a look. “We cater to simple as well, I promise.”

She was right, and it was difficult to deny how soft the fabric was. He found it hard to deny her offer that if he sucked it up and bought himself something nice too, she would discount the dress and Jon smirked to himself. She drove a hard bargain, but something about her sweet nature was not easy to say no to. Reminding him a bit of Old Nan, he didn’t say yes but he kept holding onto them which was an answer in and of itself.

The sound of a curtain being pulled caught his attention, seeing you step out just a bit in the dress. The long sleeves and way it flowed just enough below your knees you knew you wouldn’t feel self conscious in it. Your look was hopeful, that he would like it on you but Jons instant smile gave that answer to you. Walking up, he looked you over not even in a needing way, one of almost pure adoration as you looked wide eyed at him. Leaning down muttering playfully, “If you don’t let me buy you that,”

Rolling your eyes in as much of a jest you muttered, “Fine, fine.” Looking down for a moment you saw what he was holding. “Are you getting something?” Jon only brushing it off that it was a few shirts, plain and black and nothing to get excited over when your brows narrowed. A stern tone coming over you suddenly, “You always look handsome in them though, thats reason enough to get excited.”

Pushing you back in the direction of the fitting room, Jon just told you to hurry up, the woman at least picking up on how it was all in jest and not anything pushing. By the time he had paid and gotten you both out on the street again in the sun, thats when it happened. The thing he couldn’t stop thinking about including now.

He and you had been waiting to cross the street to get to where you both would stop to get something to eat. Your eyes were simply glancing around non nonchalantly as much as he was watching between the crossing sign, and on you. That time, he didn’t say anything. Maybe he just couldn’t.

Spotting a store nearby, your eyes softened with something almost wishful painted over them. A tiny little want to smile at what it was before your attention was drawn away by a dog barking across the street. Jon though, stayed looking for a moment.

It was a store he wasn’t familiar with for a reason. Sitting in the window was a display, set up to look like a little nursery. The bedding, the cradle, a little mobile that held different animals hanging from it over top. But inside the cradle, facing the window was a soft looking plush of a wolf. It’s fur a mixture of a light grey to white with some light browns mixed in that reminded Jon of both Nymeria and Lady. Thats what caught your attention. A little nursery with a stuffed wolf plush where the baby would’ve been, and Jon saw that bright look in your eye as you saw it.

He recalled his heart feeling like it wanted to beat out of his chest, how there was no denying that you looked at it all as if wondering a what if. Jon wanted that what if so badly, he wanted it before, he wanted it then, and as he laid there that night, wind howling against the shutters of Crasters Keep, Jon wanted to come home and make it a reality.

Part of him already did. He went back the next day before arriving for his shift. He didn’t go overboard, or buy anything that if you saw right away, would be over stepping. He only went in, asking if the wolf plush was for sale and took it with him. It was presently sat in his work locker, normally where he kept Longclaw and other weapons since he didn’t like taking them home with you living there.

When handing the money over he had hesitated. What would he say to you about why he bought it. But really, there was no rush. Jon would simply wait until maybe one day you two might actually have everything together. You would be ready, Jon would propose and marry you in the Winterfell godswood. And soon after hopefully, when you got pregnant, he’d pretend as if he just bought it as your to be child’s first toy. He didn’t have to tell you he bought it months or years earlier the day after you spotted it in the store. You’d forget about it by then, and he could surprise you.

So to lay there that night, knowing he still had at least a day and a half before seeing you again, it made Jon feel out of his mind. He missed you, and he wanted to see you again, but being away from you was only further feeding into the addiction in his mind that was desperately attempting to fast forward his life with you to the point you had a family. He needed to take his time, but the wolf plush and engagement ring Jon was hiding from you at his station, was only proof to Jon that he was struggling and failing in that endeavour.

This time around, you were at least angry when the tears started.

Shoving the small object into the box along with the papers you previous hid in it, you were shocked it even survived. You sat sat in the bathroom on your side of the house, on the edge of the tub you looked at it for almost five minutes. The stupid little design they chose was condescending. The only one you bought wasn’t even just normal like the others, instead its results were determined by a frustrating smiley face or frowny face.

You stared at that little digital face smiling at you for a long time before it hit you once more how much this was your fault, and took it out on the device. Throwing it harshly against the wall, but all it did was clank against the floor still in once piece. It was fine. The smile was still there, mocking you. So you hid it away as well.

Shoving things back into the closet a little less carefully, you heard a knock at the door as Theon called your name. Almost dropping things suddenly you felt a fluster of fear at being caught, shouting with a rather snapping tone, “I’m busy.” You didn’t hear anything after that as you scrambled to get everything in place as best you could before closing the door to the closet once more.

Why you even bought it you didn’t know. As if that little device would tell you the truth and the doctor was wrong? But no, the device agreed with his assessment and you stood with your hands over your face trying to keep in everything that followed. Inhaling, you only moved them to wipe away the tears as you shook your head trying to collect yourself.

Moving to the mirror, you hastily put your hair back to a messy braid to attempt to clean up how obvious it was you were running your hands through the strands in an anxiety and frustration. Though, it didn’t do much for your expression, but you didn’t have an easy solution for that. That time another knock was heard but followed that time by Robbs voice, more knowing and worried in tone. Your eyes closed long enough to sigh deeply before telling yourself to just face him and apologize for snapping at Theon.

Opening the door, you saw Robb had to turn back, as if he expected your silence meant you were to ignore him as well. Calling your name, he returned close to where you were stood, hand braced holding the door open and the other against the wooden frame with a hesitant look in your eye. “What?”

Head jolting back a little, Robb clearly tried to brush off the tone and not match with that shortness in his approach. “What do you mean, what? I never hear you snap at Theon like that anymore.” Sighing as you looked to the side, your face fell a bit to relent saying you’d apologize. Meaning to move into the hall, that time Robb shot his hand out to brace against the wall in front of you, stopping you in your tracks. “It’s not just that. Somethings been wrong these past few days. Ever since you spent the afternoon with Margaery.” His eyes narrowed, more of a command coming from him expecting you to not leave him in silence. “What happened?”

Both of you knew that you wanted to dismiss it and say nothing happened, but you both also knew that he would not believe that nor could you likely sell it convincingly at this point. “I-” cutting yourself off, you crossed your arms over your front as if protecting yourself from the lack of threat Robb gave. “I’m just off lately. I don’t know, my brain isn’t cooperating I suppose.”

Narrowing his eyes as Robb looked down at you, you wondered once more just how much or how little he believed that. “That why you’ve been hiding yourself away?” Your head peeked up with a question as he softened his gaze towards you. A hand coming to tuck a loose strand you didn’t catch in your braid, behind your ear before cupping your cheek comfortingly. “Love, we’ve barley seen you lately. Is it just missing Jon?”

That had you bite down against your tongue, it was about Jon, but not that really. And Robb caught your pause, how you didn’t seem to know quite how to answer the question. “It’s..not that simple.” Robb tried to catch your gaze more only to hear Theon out in the hall moving about when it dawned on you why he was at your door in the first place. “We don’t have time for this we have to go.”

That time you almost slipped passed him when Robb turned, grabbing you by the upper arm and turning you around to look at him. “Hold on, we have enough time for you to tell me whats going on.” Insisting you didn’t, Robb looked at your uncertainty and seemed to switch tactics. Letting you go before running his hand down your arm in a more soothing manner. “If you’re not up for tonight, you can stay here, it’s alright.”

The only warmth you felt in days came back. The sincerity and worry in his eyes felt like the only ones you would ever see again once this all came out. The reminder that at the very least, maybe just Robb would still have your back even just a little bit. But then you would have to say it, it would have to be real and the consequences would happen no matter what you wanted otherwise. You just wanted life to be normal, and you ruined that. But were you ready to even tell him how much you screwed up? You didn’t know. Instead you shook your head. “It’ll be good for me. Getting out of the house.”

Robb only frowned a little for a moment, looking you over before nodding his head. Surprising you, he pressed a kiss to your forehead before leaning to meet your eyes again. “Remember what I said, you can still tell me anything.” You gave only a half smile and he at least took that effort as enough for the moment if felt.

Turning you back down the hall, Robb guided you almost playfully to where Theon stood at the door. You knew he sensed your rough mood, but in a stroke of luck, played if off if only for the sake of the evening. Looking back to Robb with a jest, “About time you wrangled her up.”

Robb grinned nudging you towards your boots as you turned to glare at him which he caught with a smirk. “Aye, she’s nothing. Could pick her up and place her in the car if we needed.” You ignored that as you put everything on to leave for the night. It was Robbs idea. To get the three of you out of the house for a night, and do something even as simple as seeing a movie. Get all of you some fresh air and hopefully that cleaned out just a bit of the tenseness he knew permeated the whole house.

Luckily, it wasn’t super crowded. You felt that tightness in your chest at how many people were inside, but not so many that you would’ve needed to turn around and leave. You couldn’t even recall what the movie was, not that you bought the ticket for it. Robb gave you that look Jon sometimes did, like you were a fool for thinking you’d be paying with your own money. Walking through you could see where much of the crowds inevitably gathered at the food, only for you to pause.

It wasn’t the smell, even though you certainly noticed it more then ever before. It was the thought. Could you even eat that? What could you eat? Had you ruined things already? Certainly you thought, any of the soda’s was off limits. Heart beginning to pick up, you felt that worry spiral you into standing in place just watching as the two moved thinking you followed. It wasn’t until Theon turned to ask you what you wanted when they noticed. Him tapping Robb on the chest with the back of his hand pointing out you were stood further off.

You didn’t know what either said, only that you muttered to yourself in an embarrassed anger. “Stop it..” But the panic grew and grew, as if they’d question you for wanting nothing when you knew you felt hunger.

Robb approached, hands coming up top your upper arms calling your name, but you didn’t reply. Just wide eyes at him before you tried to shake it off. Instead of letting you speak. Robb held you in place, turning to say something without words to Theon who nodded in reply. Looking back to you, Robb just nodded towards the doors, “Lets go find us three seats, yeah?”

You just nodded, Robb wrapping an arm around you to hold you to his side as he guided you through to the theatre, Theon following shortly with only something for him and Robb. Luckily, Robb had allowed you to sit in silence, a hand occasionally running along your hair and braid as if to remind your panicking self that you weren’t alone. All you could tell yourself over the painful noise, was that Robb still cared, and maybe he would continue if you said it. But you weren’t ready, you would still have to admit it was real.

Looking more playfully at Theon as you felt a bit of yourself calm, you narrowed your eyes without yet having to whisper. “Nothing for the lady, Greyjoy?”

He only huffed a laugh, “Calling you a lady? Really?” You read the joke in his eyes as you reached a foot over cross Robbs to nudge at Theons leg, who when he went to retaliate Robb had to put a stop to it as if trying to force his rowdy children to calm down. “You didn’t look like you wanted anything,” Theons tone changed to something more sincere. “I can go get you something if you really want it.”

Shaking your head, you knew your hunger and nausea and nerves might be the worst mix possible. “I’ll be fine, thank you.” Both men looked at the other, but little yet was said about it. And as more people pooled into the theatre and sat down, they wouldn’t here.

It was fine, you kept telling yourself it was fine. But the anxiety from the previous days had not gone away, it had never lessened. In fact it only grew and grew and despite the theatre around being nothing but dark and quiet it was still too much, all you could see were people everywhere as if they where whispering about you. Or perhaps, your mind was whispering what they would once all found out.

You weren’t married, you weren’t even close to married. You were so far away from such a life that you expected everyone to turn on you if they found out. Nothing calmed your mind and no doubt crying yourself to sleep the night before had not helped in that matter. Not even aware of how much time had passed, you too noticed you had not a clue what was going on in the film playing before you.

Words and dialogue was spoken but none of it entered your mind. No action nor movement really registered. All you could feel was the beating of your heart, the sound of it as if ringing in your ears and it travelling up to your head to make it feel heavy. Your brain foggy as if all you could pick out were the very worst thoughts only there to torment you.

Not having moved an inch in what you didn’t realize was nearly an hour, you had caught the glances of Robb noticing how you only grew more tense not less. Your stomach sat in knots and you only felt a wave of something inside of you as your mind refused not to correlate the two things. The feeling just pangs of hunger and tings from anxiety and yet it only served to remind you what you were hiding and the fear of how soon would it be until you couldn’t hide it anymore.

How along you would be when you did and suddenly the fear waved through you stronger then ever. Your father and mother, they certainly wouldn’t accept it. They wouldn’t let you come back to Dragonstone like that, they wouldn’t allow you to bring that disgrace into their lives. Maybe Renly you thought, he could let you stay in Storms End, he might be the only in your family not to shame you but you had never lived in the Stormlands, and seldom spent time there in many years. You’d be just as alone there.

Before a gasp could leave your mouth in shock, as a hand grabbed your arm did Robb lean over with his other outstretched to run along the back of your hair with a gentle whisper. “Do you want to go?” You shook your head no, but he didn’t buy it. You didn’t want to ruin the night the way you would ruin every single night they all could’ve shared with you in the future. But it wanted to come out so badly. Leaning more he tried again, “Come on, love. Just for a minute, lets get some air.”

Closing your eyes, you inhaled before nodding. Looking over to Theon with his eyes worried on you from what you could see of the bright screen reflecting off of him. Your smile failed to even come out, and he only looked more worried. Robb leaned down to whisper something to him that he acknowledged, before turning back to guide you out of the aisle. Not speaking in the silence as you passed the other seats until you were out the door.

The bright light almost overwhelming for a moment but Robb just guided you out without taking his hands away from you, as if making sure you felt grounded in some way that he was there. Your mind not capable at that moment of knowing Robb recognized the signs on you of a panic attack he knew getting you into fresh air was a safer spot to talk you down.

No one was out in the parking lot save for the cars of those inside, the evening falling over the sky and dimming the light from in there to something bearable out here. Turning you to face him, Robb spoke much more calm and slow for you to hear him. “You don’t have to tell me what’s wrong, but you need to breath for me. Slowly.”

Nodding, you tried to do so as you hadn’t let your lungs fill with air reasonably for quite a while it seemed, the inside of your chest straining for more. One after the other, he watched you close to see you come down slowly, but enough you didn’t tip into panic. But, panic was not the only emotion. Panic was one of them, not all of them. Fear was more then just panic, fear was everything else the panic alone hadn’t covered.

Stammering, you felt the warmth in your face explode before being able to stop it as you felt the sting in your eyes collecting it all. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to ruin-”

“You didn’t ruin anything, we’re still out.”

But you shook your head more adamantly, you had and you would. You couldn’t tell him, maybe the last thing you were sure would stand by you would leave too. He was Jons brother, why would he side with you on this over him? His closest companion his whole life compared to you of all people. But it slipped out. Maybe you wanted to say it, maybe your brain was too overwhelmed and mistakened your thoughts alone for speaking it into the air, but you said it as the water collected in your eyes started to freely fall down your cheeks.

“I’m pregnant.”

Robbs eyes grew wide, and your tears fell more. “You’re-” He only cut himself off as you nodded. Ripping yourself from his touch you turned away. Rising your hands up half hidden by your sleeves as if a child, covering your mouth to try and prevent the sound but he still saw the tears. “Does Jon-” Again he cut himself off as you shook your head no, and you could see it dawn upon him in his eyes. “The other day. You weren’t with Margaery, were you.”

Inhaling, you tried wiping away tears but more came and you gave up the idea. “I saw a doctor, I didn’t know, I thought maybe it was just stress but he-” Another moment you covered your mouth to swallow the cries down. “I took a test just to be sure and...” Your eyes went wide at his subsequent silence and realized another fear, you thought Jon may see you that way but Robb could too and without thinking twice you begun stammering through trying to explain yourself. “I didn’t do it on purpose, I promise.”

Robb’s head jolted back that you even assumed he thought that, but you continued before him.

“It was when we went to the wedding, we got there and we had to get ready to go right away and I forgot to take my birth control, and I was a little drunk when we got back and forgot it then too. It was one day, I only missed one day by accident and I-” Turning away again you hid from the cries unable to stop. You ruined everything because of your own stupidity.

Muttering you were sorry, Robb approached behind you with a gentle murmur of your name before turning you to face him. But he didn’t say anything, not at first. Before you could try and hide away, Robb pulled you into his arms. Hiding you in his chest as he almost acted as the thing to keep you away from the world in that moment. Muttering close to your ear as he ran his hand along your spine, “It’s alright, love. It’s alright.”

Just muffled into his front, you tried to keep explaining yourself as if on auto pilot. “I really didn’t mean to, I promise.” Robbs brows furrowed, trying to grasp why you kept worrying that was even something he thought, or any of them would think, but you were too upset to see that.

Pulling back enough, Robb guided you slightly to the side, never letting go as he sat you down on the bench in front of the more garden like display outside the theatre till. Tilting your face to look to him, Robb sat close and kept your eyes on him. “So let me put this together. You and Jon went to the wedding, you forgot to take your birth control that night. Just that one night?” Nodding again you started to say you promised, but he shushed you. “I don’t need you to promise me, love. I believe you. After that one night, you never missed a dose. So it was that one night?”

Nodding, you tried wiping the tears away a bit on one side of your face before Robb let his thumb collect some on the other. Your voice shaky but a bit more stable as you tried to stay breathing evenly. “I never forget..I don’t even know what happened.” Robb tried saying it was simple mistake but you couldn’t get there. “It wasn’t simple. I never forget, and the one time I did, I ruin everything.”

Robb smiled a little, almost just in a tender manner. “You didn’t ruin anything, this isn’t ruining things.” Sighing deeply, he allowed you to look down and away more at your feet for a moment trying to collect yourself but the fog in your brain was too overwhelmed. “One night..so, either you have very bad luck, or us Starks are just that good.”

Your head turned to him with a half glare, as he jested he was only joking. Looking away and back again, you felt more of a headache now that the panic was disappearing. “I don’t know what to do, Robb. It’s too soon..it’s way too soon we’re not ready for this and he won’t want it.” Robb could only ask why you thought that and you shrugged. “We’ve only been dating three months, why would he. He’s going to think that after we went to a wedding I forgot it on purpose to trap him.”

How you got to that conclusion, Robb did not know.

In fact, he was so baffled by the assertion, he laughed. “Love, no one in this world would think you of all people were trying to trap a man with a baby.” You didn’t quite look his way nor appreciate the joke or laugh, but knew he meant to try and lighten the mood for your sake. Wrapping an arm around you, Robb pulled you into his side, running up and down your upper arm as he looked down at you, your hands in your lap fiddling with one another mindlessly. “What did he say? The doctor, about what to do next?”

Your brain jumped to that horrible conclusion that he suggested worried Robb was too. “He said if I wished, he could prepare Moontea for me...” Robb slowly spoke, guessing you weren’t comfortable with that. But you hesitated, a voice hardly sounding like yours spoke quiet and meek. “Maybe it would make things easier. I could go tomorrow..and Jon would never have to know..”

“But do you want that?”

You didn’t know what you wanted, you were too tired and upset to consider that. “I just don’t want this to end. Jon will hate me for ruining his life, everyone else will too. My own father and mother would like rather disown me then take me in when they find out.” Robb only asking why you’d have to even go to them, and you muttered the answer not brave enough to look him in the eye. “Jon won’t want me living there anymore, and I don’t know why you or Theon would either.”

Sighing out, Robb muttered your name causing you to look over at him. His eyes bright in the evening light making the blue stand out more. “You want to keep it, yeah?” You nodded, shyly, only once, and didn’t look him in the eye. “Then you keep the baby, and we figure out what to do to make sure you’re both healthy from now on.” Looking confused to him, Robb only explained gently. “No one in my family would send you away for this. You’re staying right here, with us. Where we can take care of you, and the baby when it comes to it. Jon included.”

“But Jon-”

Robb cut you off without skipping a beat. “Jon is not going to break up with you, or hate you for this. I promise. He comes home tomorrow night, and you tell him. And you’ll see.”

In truth, you completely doubted that. Everything you put Jon through, and you do this to him right when his life was getting to such a good point and you both were finally enjoying your time being together for the first in your lives. You coming to him with this was trapping him, but you knew if you didn’t tell him, Robb would. And you could only guess such news would not go over so well if it came from him.

You still couldn’t believe you had done this to him. His first relationship in a long time that Jon seemed actually happy in, and you were about to ruin all of it. Maybe Robb was right and he wouldn’t hate you, but he wouldn’t want to be with you after this. Why would he want this? Raising a baby out of wedlock, people looking at the child as if her mother was some harlot. You had not properly preyed to the Seven in a long time, but you thought not even they would be merciful to you at this point.

Looking back up to Robb, you felt the tears possibly start to dry up. “Thank you.” Catching his gaze that had been looking out to the night, you elaborated. “For not getting mad at me..or turning me away.”

Asking why he’d do that, you just shrugged again as he let his hand not around you, reach over to run thus thumb over your cheek, feeling the now drying tears under the skin. “No matter what happens, love, I’ll be here. I promise.” Pulling you close to leave another kiss to your forehead, Robb kept you leaning there for a while until a voice spoke out.

Calling your name you sat up straighter looking to Theon, “You alright?”

You nodded, but his eyes flickered to Robb. They seemed to say something to one another as if Theon understood something, but you tried to play any of it off. “I didn’t mean to keep you two from the movie..I just..needed a minute.”

Theon only shrugged, tossing Robbs jacket at him and carefully handing yours to you with much more care. “Movie was boring anyways. I’m thinking we order something in, the three of us can play something at home where we don’t have to pay attention.”

Both looked at you in a patience waiting for you to answer, looking between them with that realization. “You’re asking me?” Theon laughed saying yes as if teasing you for such an obvious thing. “That sounds good, I think.”

“You think?” Your face looking back up to Theon, who helped pull you up onto your feet as Robb put his jacket on. “You better be sure, because it’s the pizza place you like so much we’re ordering from.” Before you could even ask why order for your sake, Robb had moved around you to put your jacket on as if a parent dressing a child as Theon only looked at you flatly. “You don’t think I can tell you’ve been crying, Baratheon?” You felt a flush right away that he noticed, but Theon only pulled a more casual arm around you to drag you with him into the parking lot as Robb followed. “Of course we’re ordering something you like.”

All but forcing you to sit in the front with Robb, you knew both were treating you a bit with kid gloves but for once you had nothing to protest about it. The fear coming from never having this kind of softness again with Jon perhaps influencing you to let Robb and Theon be softer with you then normal, in case once Jon came home tomorrow, it was all over for good.

Jon knew something was wrong, but not this of all things.

When he first pulled into the driveway, no one yet was home. Still early enough that the other would be at work. You might be as well, but Jon knew that wouldn’t be such a big deal. Turning everything off, he hand turned back to look at Ghost, who had been happily slumbering away on the drive home. Only with his head perking up, did the direwolf shift eager to stretch his legs. “You want to run around a bit first before going in?” Ghost only slightly tilted his head, an indicator to Jon as good as a yes. A small grin on his face as he pulled his keys from the ignition. “I thought so.”

Stepping out first, Jon gave a wide space for Ghost to jump out. Shaking his fur before looking up to Jon for reassurance. Only nodding his head to the side, did Ghost give a small bark and take off, no doubt already seeking the scent of his own wolf siblings. Getting in the front door, the house was mostly quiet. A distant sound far off of typing, but coming from the living room Jon guessed instead of the office space, once your room, you had chosen to take advantage of the weather. In each room the windows were all open, the curtains blowing in the cool breeze.

Putting his keys down, Jon already could imagine it. You sat on one of the couches by the window, your feet up on the coffee table with your laptop sitting on you as you typed away, no doubt forgetting the coffee beside you for so long it grew cold. Probably had earbuds in, not always listening to music but sometimes just to immerse yourself in the quiet. Pulling off the heaviest layers on him first to put into the side closet, before making his way over to you.

He was partially right, you were placed right where he imagined, but no drink in sight. You also didn’t look quite as content as he imagined. An exhaustion on your face with a frown that felt as if it was etched there for quite a while before he arrived. Murmuring your name, you looked up almost in a startled gasp before realizing. Pulling your ear buds off, but not making a move towards him yet. “You’re back early.”

A slightly bemused look came over him, pulling his phone out briefly just to look at the time. “Not so early.” Your eyes glanced down to the screen to check the time and your face fell a bit to relent he was right. Chuckling, Jon made his way over to you instead, sitting down as he let his arm stretch across the top of the couch just above you as he leaned more into your side. “You’re having fun.”

You made a small laugh in your chest, the page open on your screen just an abundance of numbers attached to a few scattered names. Shrugging a shoulder, your voice was quieter then he expected, almost a bit on the weary side which Jon was sure you didn’t think he had noticed. “It isn’t as exciting as what you do, I will give you that.” A grunt just came from his chest as you looked at him, “What?”

Jons eyes lit up almost playfully as he looked back at you. “Too much fun if you ask me. Had to go out and deal with Craster again.” Slowly you closed the laptop, sitting it off to the side as you listened to him continue with an exhaustion so prevalent in his bones. “I think he’s the only one north of the Wall who cares that I’m a Snow.” Your own face fell, a frustration he could identify on you for many years when others had brought it up. “Most people here keep it to themselves, but he never does. I never hear anyone call me bastard so much then when I’m dealing with him.”

Shifting in your seat a bit, you moved so you could pull your legs close and sit more with your feet under you, Jon reacted right away by sitting more at an angle you could lean into him better, the furrow in your brow rather cute to him in comparison to your words. “He has no right to judge anyone else for who they are, the kind of man he is. Didn’t he marry his daughter once?”

Jon looked down at you with more wide eyes, “Who told you that?”

Briefly your eyes flickered to the side trying to figure out an answer but settled on the truth. “Karsi might have mentioned it once. Is it true?” Jon only shook his head with a sigh, pulling you closer into his side muttering that he was not about to get into all of that. “That isn’t a no...”

Chuckling more, Jon turned to press a kiss into the side of your hair before using his free hand to reach up, tucking some loose strands behind your ear as his voice lowered to a rasp. “What about you? You said something the other day about being bored without me?” Normally, Jon knew you’d have an easy answer to that or a teasing joke, but instead for a moment you hesitated. Saying nothing as your eyes drifted to the side as if figuring something out on what to tell him.

“Saw Margaery a few days ago. Saw a movie last night.” Asking what it was, Jon too noticed you didn’t have the answer right away. Trying to think on it before playing it off. “I don’t remember, it wasn’t that good, we ended up coming back and just playing something for the night instead.” When asked who you specified Theon, Robb, and yourself as Jon nodded. Quickly changing subjects it felt, you looked a bit more enthusiastic finally. “They both said they’d be home late tonight, so I was thinking we could make something together?”

Your eyes lit up, almost hopeful as if he would say no, which was laughable to him. “Love to.” A small smile, Jons hand still by your cheek, he ran his thumb over the soft skin for a moment, before slipping his fingers under your chin to tilt your head up. Almost obeying his silent command, your eyes slipped closed before he even made a substantial move. Starting off slow and chaste, Jon kissed you just savouring the feeling of your lips against his after far too many days gone. Running that hand more over your hair to keep you pressed to him, he kept it soft and delicate. Something in the tender way you responded wasn’t as eager as you normally would be, and Jon felt no need yet to rush you into things.

Pulling back once, then twice, Jon could tell that you had barley even tried moving your hands over to him, only glancing down when he finally pulled away the third time. Quick enough that he spotted his confirmation before your eyes even opened. Hands almost nervously trying to keep to themselves as if Jon wasn’t happy to freely grab at you the way he needed. But not yet did he point it out, just something he stored in wonder. Pressing a kiss to your forehead, he rasped gently, “Let me at least change into something other then this, don’t get anything started without me.”

You though, had a different idea on what that meant. Only taking a few minutes, you were not even where Jon left you. Instead you had gotten up, moved into the kitchen and he heard the sounds of you gathering things to start prepping with. Just shaking his head with an amusement, he rounded the corner to see you focused on looking through the higher cupboard for whatever you needed. Coming up behind you without a word, Jon grabbed at your hip to steady you with one hand, and reached up with more ease with the other to get it for you. Putting it down as you muttered a thank you, but Jon just pulled your hair all the way back and over the opposite shoulder he stood at.

Grabbing both of your hips, he leaned down more towards your ear as you got started. “What did I say about starting without me?” You didn’t look, only a slightly playful mutter that you were doing prep, not starting the meal when Jon rolled his eyes. Pressing a kiss to your neck to mutter along it, “Same thing, darling.”

Jon could only be eternally grateful that the other two would be gone until late, giving Jon full, free reign to be as affectionate with you as he wanted. Always looking for an excuse to touch you in some way, brush a hand over you, sometimes if you were in the way, just picking you up by the hips and moving you slightly to the side no matter how flustered it made you.

By the time Ghost came inside, you looked over at him almost in a knowing disbelief. “You have an impeccable timing, you are aware of that?” If a direwolf could smile, Ghost was doing it. Coming closer, the nudged his head into your legs, making you laugh. “Alright, alright.” Jon knew the small bowl you sat out had been for him, you the weakest of any of them here when it came to giving into the direwolves asking for some kind of treats. Ghosts being very simple but very specific. He liked cooked meat, and especially when you would kneel down and let him gently feed from your hand. Almost like in the wild trying to earn the trust of an animal, but this one would bonk himself into you after for more pets.

Jon put the knife in his hand down to kneel as well. Running a gentle hand around Ghost’s ears as he ate what was in your hand. “I know, I missed her too.” Your eyes flickered to catch his for a moment, something soft like a smile wanting to come over you but it didn’t reach you the way you thought it did. It was meek and not so whole in a hesitant sort of way. But with Ghost in front of you, it was wiped instantly as you laughed again as Ghost made a small whining noise as a stand in for a thank you. Jon tilted his head to the side, “You know the rule.”

Turning on a dime, Ghost knew he wasn’t allowed inside the kitchen when food was being prepared outside of being given a treat. Instead he would always circle in place, and lay down right at the edge of the kitchen and hallway. Only his front paws and head were crossing the line dividing the room as the rest were outside but he always watched. When Grey Wind would some times join him it was impossible to easily leave the room, having to climb awkwardly over the direwolves who refused to budge now that they were cozy.

It itched at Jon again. Something was off. You would talk, and joke and smile with him as usual, but something about it felt..distant. Almost sad. As if you were a light dimming a bit but pretending you were running perfectly fine. He didn’t pry, he didn’t want too. Not yet. Something seemed it was bothering you, but you two had the evening to yourselves and you wanted to enjoy it. Trying to get passed where he had stood in the moment, you had slipped behind him, hands braced somewhat against his back and sides asking if he could see if it tasted good.

You meant what you had on the stove, but Jon took a bit more of a playful route since he could freely yank you about. Grabbing your arm and turning you to him, Jon cupped your cheek and spared no thought to press his lips to yours. Your hands grabbing at his sides almost to steady yourself in suprise. It was deep and more needing then before. Running his tongue along your bottom lip as it an ask, he only just barley let his tongue slip into your mouth. Brushing so lightly against yours before pulling back and slowly turning things back down before muttering against you. “Perfect.”

Trying to pull away, Jon only grabbed you by the hip to keep you there as he smirked down at you trying to not look at him, as you now felt more flustered. “I meant the food..”

Jon pulled you back for one more, quicker but more urgent and rough just as swiftly ending it. “I know.” His smirk growing wider as you tried to turn away rather bashful to set the table. Humouring you, Jon didn’t even know why you needed him to try, it was always good.

He remembered the first time ever tasting your cooking. You were teenagers, and a class you took you were supposed to prepare a meal for a date. Jon had turned to look at you with a very amused grin only for you to get very flustered. Saying that it was for a specific class, and the challenge was not to make something you were comfortable with but to choose a scenario at random and make something fitting for it.

But, you were nervous about it being bad. During one afternoon, Jon took a time he knew you had no class, knowing he could drive you back in time for your next one to do this while no one was home. You had asked what about him and Jon said little about skipping for this purpose. You didn’t let him do anything, just fussing around the kitchen with a very determined look in your eye and a scowl that seemed to appear specifically when you were focused and concentrating.

Too nervous to even try yourself, you stood against the counter watching him try it, almost hiding your face in your too long for your arms, sleeves. He recalled almost telling you that he could fall in love with you all over again, but catching that it would mean admitting he was in love with you at all in the first place. It was better then he imagined for how nervous you were. Your parents rarely every let you in the kitchen and Jon assumed you had no experience outside of the specific class you were taking.

Instead he had muttered between bites that any guy would fall in love with you easy if you fed them this during a date. It came out of Jon a bit easier, you were two years younger then him at fourteen and mumbled a very flustered, “Shut up.” Before sitting down so you could actually enjoy what you made with him. Ever since, it was as if you loved to cook for people. The Starks were more then happy to have you over and make something, knowing it was the only time you could use a kitchen outside of school.

It translated to now, how often even though all four of you had a rotation schedule of who makes dinner on what nights, you ended up either starting it yourself, or making the whole thing. So many times growing up did his family make jokes towards you that if you cooked for guys for a date, you wouldn’t be single for much longer. You never acknowledged it beyond a bit flustered over it, but it didn’t come true anyways.

You only went on scattered one off dates, so few Jon wasn’t even sure you’d need two hands to count how many, that was until Karl Tanner. Part of Jon felt a bit tense thinking about it, how much you also were used to doing all of this because he made you do it. Tanner didn’t seem a man who was happy to cook with you, or do much of anything with you let alone for you.

Trying to do everything still, Jon reached over grabbing both plates in your hands from you muttering in your ear from behind, “Let me do this, go sit.” You turned to look at him almost asking if he was sure, but Jon just nodded towards the table as his answer.

You were avoiding something. The way anytime Jon even remotely tried to get close to figuring out what was wrong, what had your mind so preoccupied before you changed the subject entirely. Truthfully, Jons only plans had been to hopefully get you into a bath before just laying with you on the couch, enjoying the quiet for once. But you didn’t seem quite to the point where relaxing would could naturally to you.

Helping you clean up, Jon didn’t quite let you go in time for you to again scurry about nervously. He wasn’t going to interrogate you, but he grasped at your hips, keeping you pressed up against the counter with his chest warm against your back. “Darling, settle.” Your brows furrowed for a moment as he elaborated. “You’ve been running around the moment I got back. I want you to relax.” Slowly pulling your hair from one shoulder out of his path, he leaned down pressing his lips gentle to your neck.

A soft sigh left you at first. One then another, each press of his lips found a new spot creating a path downward. His hands slunk down enough to the bottom of your shirt, only sneaking upward enough to run across your bare skin as you shivered in his touch.

Slowly, Jon continued to raise his hands, pulling against your shirt inch by inch until it sat just below your breasts. Suddenly, did you jolt. Not severe, and not far, but enough that it caught Jons attention for him to run them back down. Murmuring your name, you just whispered an apology. “I’m sorry..just..not here.”

No one was in the house, nor outside to see you both, but he nodded. “How about a bath at least? I just want an excuse to have you close.” Why you hesitated he wasn’t sure, but he didn’t think the reason was him. It was almost something insecure inside you, but you agreed anyways. Turning you, Jon led you down the hall, prompting you into the bathroom first. Kissing the back of your head, he muttered, “Stay right here.”

Moving into his room, Jon had an idea come to him. Somewhere he knew when he had encouraged you to move things into his room, he had seen something in a box you had yet to bring back out. Some sort of oils he remembered you said were to help you relax, and figured maybe it would help soothe your mind just a little bit. Opening his closet door though, where he noticed it should be, everything seemed dishevelled. Normally that side of the closet was rarely even touched, he could practically draw where everything was.

Now it was all scattered. Put away hastily which he didn’t do, but it didn’t seem like something you would do either. So much more organized even then he was. Reaching upwards, Jon attempted to shift things off to the side for now to just get what he needed and fix it later, but something was shoved up on the shelf poorly, and sat on top of the fabric he was moving. The tug from the fabric made it fall down, but too came something harder with it.

The object on top of one corner, a small box with a flick up lock, smashing down to the ground it didn’t break apart but the contents of it fell to the floor and scattered around. Jon didn’t recognize it, kneeling down he flipped it upright with one hand, picking up some of the things with his other. Small trinkets and handmade things, little stags included and he knew this was something of yours he had never seen before.

Glancing backwards to the partially closed door, Jon tried to put everything back so you wouldn’t be embarrassed he accidentally found this stash of innocent secrets. Only as he reached for something, it took him off guard. A folded piece of paper with the words hidden on the inside sat atop a white object. His mind sent into an alert right away, he knew what that looked like. Reaching out, he grasped it and pulled it towards him as his other held the paper.

Jon knew what it was, but didn’t confirm his suspicions until he flipped it over. There wasn’t much too it, just a white plastic sort of material with a small screen on it with a few tiny cracks which looked fresh, likely from the fall just now. But on the screen wasn’t words or anything, but just a smiley face.

But, Jon wasn’t stupid. He knew what he was looking at. Almost without thinking Jon opened the paper, seeing your full name and information scattered across it, and it just confirmed exactly what the rest of it said. The date stated the day you said you were out with Margaery, you were at a doctors. Getting these results. He didn’t know which of these came first but they matched.

Everything in him felt frozen. This is what you were trying to hide, this is what had you nervous and on edge. Suddenly your voice came through, a gentle but concerned tone calling his name as you poked your head through the door. “I heard-”

He wasn’t even looking back at you. Crouched on the ground, neither of you could deny what Jon had found. You said nothing as he did, but for two every different reasons. Jon felt something almost numb in shock as you stood with something growing in fear.

A fear turning to panic that almost changed to tears right away. You wanted at least one night. One single night you both could just be alright together, one night you didn’t have to think about losing him but Jon found it anyways and now you didn’t even have that. This was it. The last of it, and you didn’t even get to enjoy what little of Jon you’d ever have again before it all fell apart.

The sensation rising in your face, you rose your arms up, trying to hide the need to cry behind your long sleeves but it was obvious. Standing slowly, Jon held both, looking at you with an expression you now had no idea how to read. Something dark and not normal, something which told to you he was having a reaction that you had never seen before. His voice spoke low, slowly, with a rough strain in it as if he was barley containing whatever lay behind it. “Is this true?”

You didn’t speak. You couldn’t speak. Only a nod did tears start then, hating that you couldn’t last to hold off. He’d just accuse you of everything you feared, and now using tears to try and get sympathy. “I-” It cut itself off, the words. You had said it last night to Robb, but this wasn’t last night. This was Jon, and Jon wouldn’t have the same reaction. It wasn’t Robbs life you ruined by telling him, but Jons was about to be.

Hands dropping to wring together, almost letting your nails just dig right into the skin of each opposite hand, you failed to find anything to justify this. Anything that would make him feel better. And when you did, you could only settle on one meek little promise in a small voice that made you feel pathetic for even needing to say it. But if he hated you, you wanted him to have one thing. “I didn’t do it on purpose..I promise..”

Jons expression looked completely taken back. “You prom-” Cutting himself off, he looked possibly angry but you weren’t sure anymore. Wanting to turn and run away and never come back but your anxiety had your feet glued in place. The silence so heavy and thick between you both, Jon finally found actual words, a breathless disbelief you couldn’t decipher. “You’re pregnant?”

“I didn’t know until,” Trying to speak through the feeling bubbling in your throat of wanting to cry. “Until the doctors, I thought it was stress..I forgot to take my birth control-just one night I promise, it was an accident. We were at the wedding and I was so distracted and then-” Covering your mouth again as if smothering the cry once more, you knew it was pointless as your cheeks were flowing with tears. “I’m so sorry, I am. I didn’t mean to do this.”

Jon only looked at you with wide eyes before dropping his head down to look at the papers and pregnancy test once more. His voice hardly there but not in the same pathetic way yours was. “Darling, if this is a joke-”

That time you cut him off, but no intimidation was found as you cried it out louder. “Jon, it’s not a joke. And I’m not trying to pressure you, I didn’t want to do this to you, okay? I’m sorry.” Your mouth started to move faster then Jons brain could keep up. “I’ll move out, this doesn’t have to be your problem, I’ll get rid of it if you really want,”

That caught Jons attention. Brows furrowing, Jon suddenly almost tossed both objects onto the dresser to the side of him, muttering your name so much more softly then before. Your eyes seeking his but struggled to understand what he was saying so silently beyond the tears.

Before you could even comprehend what he was doing, Jon had closed the gap between you both. Grabbing your cheeks, Jon almost roughly pressed his lips to yours. Stealing the suprise and uncaring that he could feel the tears under his palms. Over and over he kissed you, refusing to let you go, his hold on your cheeks tight as it desperate for you not to have a chance to escape. Soft lips kissing you deeply, your hands barley confident enough to sit at his shoulders while Jon nearly growled into your mouth at the overwhelming feeling inside of him.

Nibbling at your bottom lip, Jon suddenly bit down as if demanding you grant him access. Sliding his tongue into your mouth at your gasp, he brushed it along yours, not giving you the chance to explore him back as he overwhelmed you. Your nails dug into his shoulders, almost too scared to kiss him back the way he was to you. A hand slid from your cheek up grasp tightly your hair by the back of your neck. All but yanking your head upward as he took a step closer to you, leaning down to kiss you roughly, he felt and heard your gentle whines at the sensation only encouraging him more.

Never parting until he knew you needed air desperately, he made you look back up at him, your eyes still full of tears ready to cry but now they were paired against Jons bright grey ones looking at you as if he had seen a miracle performed before his eyes by the gods themselves. “You’re really pregnant?” Nodding, Jon pulled you close that time, all but hiding you in his neck as he buried his face in your hair, your arms grasping so gently at his sides afraid you were going to misread all of this.

Muffled against him, you felt an odd feeling of whiplash. The opposite reaction of what you had been expecting. “It’s too soon, I didn’t want you to think I was rushing into this.” Jon just laughed though, turning to press a kiss to the side of your head before pulling back. Keeping you close he cupped your cheeks, that time his eyes bright and with something gleeful in them you’d never seen before and a smile genuine.

“Darling, you think you’re rushing into this? I’m the one who was talking about you being pregnant first remember?” You only commented that you assumed you and Tormund were joking, and what you had said was little more then teasing to lighten the tension that night. Pulling you for another kiss as if he couldn’t help himself before more of a laugh came from him, his warm breath dancing across your lips as if tempting you right back. “You have no idea how much I’ve wanted this.”

You felt a bit breathless, either from such lashing emotions or from the kiss itself but you huffed a bit of a strained laugh. “With me?”

Jon laughed more gentle, turning you to look up at him more. “Of course you, who else?” You had no answer for that and he shook his head in bemusement. “Listen, I know we didn’t plan this, but we’re together now. And we do this together, no matter what you want us to do about it.” Neither of you said what he meant out loud, but the implication was there. The reason behind both were different, and maybe it was too fresh or raw now to dive into it right away. “Does anyone else know?”

You shook your head for the majority, “Only Robb. Last night I started having a panic attack over it, and it just slipped out.” Jon was more quiet, but kept you close as your hands finally drifted more upwards to rest along his torso. Asking in a low, controlled voice what he said, but you felt no reason to mince words, it had been a great comfort to have him there last night. Repeating most of it in a summarized version, he listened intently. “He tried telling me too, that you weren’t going to be mad or break up with me..but I guess I didn’t really listen to that part.”

Sighing deeply, Jon turned your head down to press a kiss to your forehead. Saying nothing for a moment, you could only hope this was going to help ease what tension they had if only for a little while. By the time he found his words, Jon gently ran his nose down the length of yours. “I still want my girl with me in a bath. Talk about this somewhere more comfortable.” Nodding gently, he kissed you just as gentle and chaste before leading you back out to the hallway.

Ghost stood at the end staring intently, and while you looked curious Jon only spoke in a more stern voice, “Ghost go easy on her.” You turned back to raise an eyebrow at him only to be ambushed by Ghost suddenly trying to run into you. Kneeling down the both of you, you pet him profusely as you looked over at him in question. Tilting his head a bit in lieu of a shrug he explained, “I wasn’t the only one who missed you these past few days, but I think I know why he did so much now.” Reaching over to run his hand over the direwolves ears he jested, “Couldn’t give me a heads up, boy?”

Only licking Jons hand in response, you both gave a laugh before he send Ghost off again, guiding you into the bathroom and locking behind. The tub filling with water, you sat gently on the edge of it to dip your hand into it with a look up to him in asking, “Little cold for your taste.”

Leaning more down over you, Jon grabbed you by the chin to pull you close, “I have to be careful now with you. Both of you.” A small fluster came over you but Jon left a gentle kiss to your lips before adding everything else. Sure of it’s heat, Jon grabbed your hands, lifting you to your feet as he held you now by your hips. Hands trailing to your shirt to toy with the edges again, that time he waited for your shy nod to lift it up and over you. Not bothering to waste, he undid the clasp at the front of your bra, letting it fall free down your shoulders and arms to the ground.

One hand ran over the sensitive skin on your neck, trailing downward to your collarbones, tracing the curve of your breasts before letting two of his knuckles trail along your stomach. “Better enjoy it now, Snow.” Looking back up at you as you shrugged. “I don’t know when I’m going to look like this again for quite a while.”

Jon only rolled his eyes playfully. Skipping down to your pants and dragging them down your legs with everything else following in his grasp. Bare in the room, your feet always just on the edge of cold wanting to get in but you weren’t ready yet. Grabbing the edge of Jons shirt, you took much more care as you pulled it up and off him. Making sure it rested on the counter beside you both, before kneeling down.

You thought little of it, but Jon made the mistake of glancing to the side. The large mirror showing an imagine that had his insides burn. All you were doing was undressing him for a bath, but on your knees, undoing his jeans before slowly pulling them down his legs with a partially obscured view of you from the counter, it looked more obscene.

Half hard already, you meant to stand but his length gave you pause. Hands braced on his thighs, you looked up with bright eyes with a question i them. Only shaking his head, you read his words and murmured back, “You’ve only ever let me do it once.”

“You’ve been scared I was going to make you leave, do all of this pregnant and alone. I’m not going to make you do something like this for me right now.” Pulling you up to your feet, Jon ran his hands along your bare skin before moving you both to enjoy the warm water. Jon taking great cares to make sure at the first stop, he had you straddling his lap to face him, your hands resting on his shoulders as his hid beneath the waters along your waist and hip.

Words were quiet between you both, neither feeling the need to speak any louder then only for the others ears despite no one else even being home. Your hands toying with his loose curls, you brought it up first. “Jon, you’re certain you want this? With me? Now?”

Nodding, Jon continued his hands path of running along your bow wet and bare skin in the perfect position for him. “I promise. Is that why you said that? That you’d get rid of it if I wanted?” Nodding, you let your arms wrap more around the back of his neck and Jon shifted to sit more upright. Pulling you to rest your forehead against his as he now played with your hair and the wet strands long down your back hitting the water.

Your voice came out smooth, but a blatant insecurity sat within it’s depths. “The doctor noticed I was upset, and offered me moontea.” Jon sat more rigid in your touch but allowed you to continue. “I was so scared you were going to be mad at me that I started to think, maybe it would’ve been better if I went back to the doctors for it, and then you’d never have to know..and you wouldn’t hate me.”

Jon was deathly quiet before more of a hiss came out. “Fuck.” Pulling you back up, Jon shifted you closer to him to ensure you kept his gaze. “Did you want that?” Shaking your head no, he exhaled shakily, before returning to toy with your hair. “Good. I know this is your choice and all but, if I didn’t know and only found out after you had..I’d almost be tempted to ask if you wanted to try but on purpose. Just so you understood how happy this would make me.”

Inhaling deeply, you let a hand run down his torso with following, innocent eyes. “When do we tell everyone else?” Reaffirming that Robb already knew, Jon put it out there that you already had a doctors confirmation, so you could tell everyone when you were ready. “Who do we start with?”

Jons idea was bold, and you took it as bold but he said it nothing more then a man very sure of himself. “Everyone.” Laughing gently at your wide eyes, he cupped your cheek, thumb running over the skin he found, leaving a gentle trace of water each path. “I know that sounds like a lot, but they’re my family. I want them to know. And it’ll be easier to get it over with in one go instead of making you go through all of them individually. Besides, once they know, it’ll be easier to figure everything out.”

Asking about your family, you shook your head as a wince came over you. Looking to the side in a lack of anticipation. “My father will just about disown me for it. My mother too. Shireen will be excited at the least.” A gentle laugh, Jon ran his hand more along the hair by your neck saying that even if they do, you had all the family you need right here.

“I want to move us into the house. I’ll ask my father about it, but I want you to be with people who can take care of you, more then just me, Robb, and Theon.” You bit on your lip a little, only to have him draw you back up, “We’ll stay there while your pregnant, and for a while when the baby is born to see what we want to do next.”

You didn’t really answer, but he understood your nod. You didn’t want to intrude, but you did certainly underestimate how much the Starks would be elated about the news for the most part. For a while the bath was peace. You and Jon too turns slowly cleaning off the other. You didn’t have to move from his lap to do his hair. His black curls long but not so much you couldn’t reach all of him.

Jon did have to turn you in his lap though for your hair. Gently running through each lock with a care, not leaving any bit unattended too. You had run your nails along his scalp, and in return, Jon spent much time almost massaging your own head and neck to keep you at peace before rinsing it all out. His hands greatly lingered there, taking advantage to sift through each wet strand as if fascinated by your hair.

Not yet leaving, Jon kept you pulled back against his chest. One hand wrapped high around your collarbones, the other slid around you to press down against your stomach. Nothing there and wouldn’t for a while, but he refused to leave the spot, as if wanting to know what you felt like so he could detect the moment you begun to slowly change. As if he was looking forward to it, despite that idea making little sense to you.

You’d be the smallest for a while now, why he didn’t want to savour that was beyond you.

Slowly you felt the hand on your collarbone leave you. Tracing downwards, you made a hum of a noise in question, but Jon leaned down to your ear. His warm rasp just shushing you. Reaching your breasts, he made a detour. Grasping the one closest to that hand, you leaned back into Jons touch, a silent cry wanting to turn vocal only coming out as a tiny whine in your chest. More and more he groped your breast, rougher and greedier before grasping at your nipple. Just enough of a pressure out that had that small cry leave you to something much louder in the air.

The hand on your stomach finally left, trailing downward between your legs, you felt Jons cock harden more behind you as you instinctively spread your legs for him. A sharp inhale against your ear as he more rested the side of his head close, to watch right over your shoulder down at your form, partially hidden by water.

Matching the treatment of your nipple, Jon skipped easing you into it. Seeking your clit, he put a hefty pressure down onto it, seeking a faster, rougher pattern that had your muscles tense in his touch. The feeling shooting a current through your body and blood that warmed your core awake to twist in that burning need. Your thighs naturally wanting to press together, you only had another wave as Jon rasped low and deeply, “Spread your legs for me, darling.” Only to send a shiver down your spine as you did so, and he rewarded you with something unfair. “Good girl.” Biting your lip trying not to be loud, every rough pull he gave to your nipple did Jon respond by putting even more pressure to you clit.

That wave flowing towards you so fast and even in the water you could tell you were growing more and more worked up for him, and he would learn that the moment he dared trail further. More and more your lungs burned, trying to contain it but you felt a warmth grow between your legs and upwards to your core in such a need. Were you not so willing to take anything Jon gave you, you might’ve been inclined to beg for more. But you didn’t, you never would and he knew it. You’d only ever take what Jon gave you and you’d be happy to do so.

Two fingers traded places against your clit as the previous begun seeking that very path. Even in the water, barley brushing against you he exhaled deeply against your ear. “You can’t be this worked up for me already.” But you nodded, muttering needing that you were, you always were for him. Leaving your breast, Jons other hand took over at your clit to give his right free space.

Two thick fingers sinking deep inside of you as he rubbed tight circles against you, dragging against your sensitive walls inside of you, you felt as if you soaked him more then the water did. Perhaps so, only growing more and more wet between your legs feeling him sink in and out of you, your legs struggling to stay wide open for him, and he knew it. Suddenly pausing only long enough, Jon used his advantage of laying out like this to wrap his foot around your ankles, each side. A gasp left you in surprise as he sunk deep to the knuckles inside of you again, barley leaving before sinking right back. “I know, darling, I know. You’re trying to be good, I’m just helping you.”

You weren’t even sure what you were nodding at, but all you felt was the burning against your clit, the feeling as he dragged his fingers in and out of and him keeping your legs locked open for him by force only had your head lean back against him with a gentle moan.

Slowly dragging in and out, you felt yourself clenching around his fingers. Taking his time to make you endure the feeling, your heart begun to pick up. Lungs working harder and harder and each breath begun to feel as if it came out needier and higher pitched. He never picked the pace up, but it felt fast to you. Your insides twisting within your core, warming like a fire wound tightly around you ready to snap at anytime. But your hands reached out, grasping along his forearm of the hand still roughly rubbing tight, small circles to your clit.

You didn’t know if you were allowed. It had been a sick game for Jon for weeks. Ever since the night of the wedding, Jon hadn’t allowed you to cum that night, nor any night since. Seeing how long you could hold off for him, and even worse, because he knew you’d never try to do it on your own when he was gone. He and you were both well aware how little you explored yourself in such a fashion, he didn’t even need to order you not to do it, he knew you wouldn’t anyways.

It always had a purpose, a meaning. He did it to make you needy, and it would work. When he’d finally let you cum, you’d cling to him as much as you could needing him close. But before now, it had only been days. He’d never made you go on like this for so long, and yet now that you felt so close so quickly you felt that fear that you’d fall over that edge without permission. Biting down against your tongue previously, you only opened your lips with a meek ask. Never for more, only this for his sake. “Jon, I can’t- you need to stop.”

His hands did, stopping within a second, not moving or withdrawing from your soaking walls, but a suddenly worry and urgency in your ear rasping, “Whats w-”

Cutting him off, you only felt Jons length twitch against you from behind as hard as it was. Your words almost begging but somehow innocent. “I can’t hold back this time..” He was silent, trying to figure it out when you tried leaning your head into his touch a bit more behind you. “You told me to tell you when I was close..if you keep going now, I don’t think I can stop it.”

Jon continued to be silent for a moment but again his cock twitched and his breathing suddenly increased in your ear, a near growl in his words when he did choose to speak. Heavy with something dripping in an authority. “You tell me your pregnant, and you still think I won’t let you cum.” You didn’t always know when his questions were rhetorical or not in such intimate moments, and you tended to answer him not to rile him up further, nodding yes that you did assume that. Slowly Jon begun to move again, just barley letting the tip of his fingers stay inside before slowly sliding them down to the knuckle.

Tensing in your muscles, unable to move as Jon kept your legs open for him, your walls clenching around him as you felt yourself grow more wet. You didn’t even say it as something seductive, just the truth which drove him crazy anyways. “I wanted to do as I was told.”

Jon felt his cock throbbing against you, his fingers against your clit starting to put the pressure back as he ran them tightly over the sensitive bundle of nerves. Steeling whatever voice you had left and drawing it from you in cries in the air, his breath hot against your ear as he rasped deeply. “No one has any idea do they, what a good girl the mother of my child is.” You clenched even tighter around as your nails dug into his arms, desperate to hold off. The feeling burning against your clit as his fingers inside of you were overwhelming on top of it all. “Thinking I wouldn’t want this, when all I’ve thought about for almost a month is getting you pregnant. You have no idea how much I’ve wanted this, how much I’ve wanted you my whole life.”

Biting your lip trying to keep his name from interrupting, his pace picked up, toying you right back against the edge of that cliff he dangled you over.

Whines desperate to leave your chest, Jon again picked the pace up, your body arching back into him as much as you could as he did so. “You don’t know, darling. How many nights in a row I’d be in my room at night, the only thing ever able to get me off was thinking about you. Looking for videos of girls who looked just like you, and how none ever came close. You’re the only one I’d ever want this with.”

Right at that edge, begging his name did Jon suddenly stop. Dark eyes looking down at you over your shoulder, breasts heaving with your legs wide open for him, because he was keeping them open himself, did Jon suddenly pull away from your cunt. Leaving your soaking walls and clit, one hand sat against your stomach while the other reached up to turn you by your jaw to partially look back at him.

The grey you could see in his eyes barley even then. “I should’ve gotten you pregnant in our bed.” Biting you lip, you barley could nod at the angle before Jon slowly released you. Grabbing by your hips he manevuered you up and off of him, carefully guiding you out of the tub never letting go of you. Keeping you in front of him, his cock hard almost between your legs as your hands rested high against his chest, you didn’t presume anything. Your legs wanting to shake from being torn from any orgasm once more, but Jon ran a hand along your wet hair to nudge you up to look at him properly. “I said no at first, but I have a deal for you.” You just nodded eagerly, his eyes closing briefly as if unable to control himself. His hands on your hips growing tighter before looking back to your eyes. “I’ll bring you to our bed, darling and make you cum. But you need to make me cum first, right here.”

Without even a second thought, you slowly dropped down to your knees. The water soaking the floor under you both but you paid none of it mind. Your hands steadying themselves against his hips as you looked up at him. Jon ran his along your cheek before raking through the wet strands of hair, making sure he had a secure hold. He didn’t need to say anything else, he gave you his order.

One hand gently reaching over to grasp at his cock, too thick to even wrap your hand around, Jons hand in your hair grew a slight bit tighter. Your lips brushing small pecks against his length, all the way down to the base of his cock where the hair was coarse and thick and back. Your eyes fluttered closed as your final was pressed to the tip of his cock. Again, his hand tightened.

Tiny kisses and licks you gave, savouring as if this was all you’d get when you knew better. Ever so slowly did you take him into your mouth. Running your tongue along, trying to gather the saliva in your mouth to make it easier. A rough sigh left his lips, as you begun to take more and more of him in your mouth.

Filling you gradually, his length was as intimidating as his girth. You had only ever done this with him once, but your heart felt as full as your mouth that he let you again. Something about it was perverse, but only towards him, did you feel a burning need to show him how obedient you’d be. Inching yourself to halfway down his cock, you didn’t allow yourself to leave him. Pulling only to his tip and back once more, each run of your tongue as you sucked his cock his hand tightened in your hair. His muscles tensing under your hands but you didn’t do anything else.

Just kept a smooth pace, trying to tell yourself to go deeper. He was a lot, more then anyone else in your limited experience but you wanted this for him. He told you to make him cum, and you’d do that, no matter what. His head fell back the slightest as you begun to take him deeper. Your heart telling you to slow down, but you refused. He was covered in your saliva deep in your mouth and it made it easier to let him sink down your throat.

A hum left you in a satisfaction as a groan left Jon. Dropping his head back down with black eyes to watch, your bare frame, hands grasping gently at his hips as your eyes were closed sucking his cock as if you genuinely enjoyed it. The image was unbelievable, unlike a single thing he’d ever watched or seen when trying to imagine you before. There was something so debauched too about how innocent you currently looked. You had wanted to do this again, and he knew it, and as little as Jon wanted you to pleasure him more then he did you, part of Jon understood why so many men sought this out from women.

It wasn’t just the feeling of your hot mouth, it was the sight of your head bobbing up and down his cock without any show for it. You didn’t even think to attempt to make yourself look alluring about it, you sucked his cock over and over only because you truly wanted to do this for him. The order was just an excuse for you to drop to your knees. How long he wondered had you wanted this?

Jon had asked you questions like it before, but this one was more filthy. How recently, or worse, how many years had it been you’d hope Jon would let you get on your knees for him? Other men in your life would’ve taken advantage of you, made you do it. How often he wondered did you get through it by pretending it was him? But it wasn’t.

None of them would’ve treated you the way he was. His hand in your hair was tight but not forceful, and the closer he got the more he adored you.

A muffled strained sound almost like a gag each time you took his full length, nose brushing up against the black hair when your hands tightened. The rasp above you so strained as he said it, “You want help?” You couldn’t really nod, but you made a more whine against him. The hand tight in your hair shifted to keep a stronger hold, as he watched you. “Relax, darling.”

Slower then you had, did Jon begin moving you along his cock. In and out, he didn’t move, only making you take his length mimicking as if you were doing it. He’d press your face right up against him and listen to the sounds before dragging you almost all the way off. Not a second was spared for you in between the moment you’d reach one end, Jons hand would push your head as deep as he could in the other. Faster and faster the pace picked up too.

The wetness between your legs growing as was the warmth in your core burning all over again at the way your heart raced. Jon though, made a mistake, his eyes glancing back to the mirror and it was so much worse. That time, there was no mistake. He couldn’t see his length filling your mouth from the higher counter, but he could see his hand in your hair and how he guided you up and down his cock over and over at a faster pace. Faster even more now that he was watching this was. Obsessed with your eyes closed and how much you looked like you really had craved this.

Maybe he’d do this in the future. Anytime he would not let you cum for days or weeks on end. Instead of giving you an orgasm, he’d let you suck his cock and that would be your reward for being so good for him. You’d like that, and that was even worse. How much you’d thank him for giving you his cock instead of an orgasm.

Closer and closer he was, you felt him throb in your mouth. Trying to follow his pace, you sucked him even more as the hand in your hair grew rather tight. Jons voice a growl above you, “Come on, darling. I need you to take every drop, yeah?” You whined and he took that as a yes.

Shoving you all the way down, your face pressing against the coarse hair as he suddenly finished. Spilling so deep down your throat that the sounds of your muffled gags only made Jon feel as if he was cumming even more. Thick and hot spurts of his seed so deep down your throat that you had no choice but to try and swallow what he was feeding you. As if this was a treat beyond anything you’d get to eat again, the taste heavy but almost addicting.

You’d never feel the confidence to admit it, how much you had wanted to suck his cock again because you liked when he spilled down your throat this was, but it was the truth. And you never once even thought about moving off his cock until Jon was the one who finally pulled you off of him.

Your mouth gasping for air as saliva and a mixture of his seed were still visible in strands before snapping as you tried to get your heart back down. The feeling of his seed pooling in your stomach making you feel another wave of need.

Looking up brightly at him, his eyes were still dark, despite his heaving chest as he came down, and his cock still half hard despite how much he had just finished in your mouth. Running a thumb over your bottom lip, “Thats my girl.” You almost looked as if you were warm on the inside from the compliment, only making Jon grow hard again.

Gently, he guided you to stand. Pulling you in by your cheek to press his lips to yours. Biting down against your lips he slid his tongue into your mouth, a need to overwhelm you in everyday in that matter as his other hand yanked you close. Your hands wrapped up around the back of his beck and into his drying curls, his cock slipping between your legs, feeling how soaked you were. Biting down against your lip once more, he pulled away as they tinged at the feeling. His eyes dark as he tore them down your frame to where his cock toyed between your legs, then back up to your eyes. “We’re doing something new tonight, and I want you to let me, no matter how much I know you’re going to want to say no.”

Nodding, he shook his own head, making you promise out loud here and now. “I won’t stop you, I promise.” Leaning down his forehead rested against yours, now both hands against your hips. Muttering he didn’t make you promise that, but you were honest as your lips pressed sweetly to his cheek. “I know, but I’m promising anyways.”

Suddenly, Jon jerked you around towards the door, not even bothering to entertain covering you up with a towel. He knew no one was home yet without a doubt, and ignored your flustered call of his name at how he guided you bare into the hallway. “No one’s home, it’s alright.”

His room was warm, closing the door behind him and locked it. Jon kept you in front of him as you both stood there, one of his hands sliding backwards between your bodies, grasping a rough handful of your plush ass. The other following not so long after, you felt his head resting against the back of yours as he watched himself grope at your ass. The sting of how he’d pull you wide just to look before continuing his rough treatment. Stammering in the air at the feeling pooling again between your legs, “Is that what we’re-”

A growl left Jon as he pulled your ass wide again, “Don’t tempt me, I mean it.” Your heart felt fluttering at how serious he was. How much he sounded as if he truly wanted to fuck your ass and the instinct not to make it worse by promising how easily you’d let him as much as he wanted. You had a feeling he already knew that. Jon could choose to only fuck you ever again by shoving you onto your hands and knees, and roughly fucking your ass and you’d never complain about it. You’d take it over and over as much as he wanted.

Pushing you over to the bed, Jon held you to stop. Biting down at your ear as his warms wrapped around your front, sliding one hand down to run along your clit again. “I want to taste you, but we’re doing it my way.” You nodded, and Jon dragged his teeth down along your neck, rough bites and sucking down into the skin you knew deep marks would be left there in no time. “Good.”

He lay down first, guiding you up to straddle him. This wasn’t the usual position, but he did take you this way once or twice before as self conscious as the angle made you feel. But he was impatient, hands grabbing at you and guiding you up further, the moment it dawned on you what he was doing, Jon held you so tight in place you too felt the bruises forming. “Jon?”

His voice barley recognizable how deep it growled, “You promised me. My girl going to obey her promise?” You nodded, and so he only dragged you higher against his chest. Just as he had you hovering over his face, did Jon not give you the chance to do it yourself. He knew you wouldn’t. He could tell you that every single day from now on you couldn’t leave this room until you got on your knees for him and you’d do it, but you’d never presume to do this on your own. You didn’t yet understand this wasn’t just for you. This was for Jon too.

Instead, he dragged you down against his mouth without asking. Your hand flying up to grasp at the headboard to steady yourself, you cried out his name. Slightly confused, but his mouth was so warm against you. Sucking at your clit before running down and drinking deeply from your cunt, his hands holding you tightly against him you couldn’t move to give him air even if he wanted you too.

“Jon,” almost a question it came out as. The feeling of his mouth between your legs but from this kind of position, something you had never even heard of before. But he held you down with his immense strength against him as he drank from you with such a greed that you he must have wanted this a long time. Deeply his tongue could reach inside of you this way, and your cries echoed against the walls and back to both of your ears. Music it was to Jon as insecure as yours felt, but you couldn’t stop them.

That burning feeling returned again, twisting inside of your core like it was a metal being moved by force to wrap around something white hot. A star waiting in the sky to burst but by his order and no sooner, no matter how close it came to exploding. Trying to hold off, your nails dug into the wood of the headboard, almost coming close to letting splinters sink either into the skin or nails themselves but you couldn’t focus on that.

A feeling of lightheadedness followed the pleasure building as you finally spoke, but Jon never stopped tasting you, never even slowed down. Just grabbed at your hips with rougher handfuls closer to your ass as he increased his greed in how much your wetness gifted his taste buds. “Jon, I won’t be able to, please, I don’t want to disobey you.”

Groaning against you, that was when he reluctantly pulled away. Lifted you off of him, but Jon spared no time. Flipping you both around, your head lay back against the pillow as he hovered over you. Pressing his lips down to yours, you made a cry against his kiss, only to have him slide his tongue inside your mouth again. That time shamelessly sharing the taste you made him so addicted too, as your core burned and felt soaking wet between your own wetness and his saliva.

Pulling back, he cupped the back of your head as he now held more wider eyes looking down at you. Muttering your name, your hand one at his side, the other reaching up to run gentle your fingertips along his facial hair. Something despite the position, sat soft between you both as he looked down at you. “I’m not going anywhere, and neither are you.” Leaving your hair as one hand kept him raised up, he let it slink down so his palm rested against your stomach. “This is our baby. I love you, and you love me. That’s all we need to get through this. I promise.”

Normally, Jon always made you promise. A habit made to get you to look after yourself, but this time, he promised you. That everything making you so scared of this wasn’t needed, it wouldn’t be true. You nodded, and he was much more gentle pressing his lips to yours. Pulling one leg up by your thigh to hitch up against his hip, you willingly let the other fall more open and spread wide against the sheets for him. He didn’t need to line up, he was at the perfect angle.

Slowly sinking deep inside of you, one smooth thrust with no resistance you were so soaking wet for him. It was soon, it was too soon. This relationship between you was still fresh and growing but Jon never wanted you to think you’d ever made him want to leave. You were terrified of scaring him away, but the moment Jon even slightly begun to pull out of your soaking, warm walls, he slid right back as deep as he could because that was as far away as he was willing to go.

Pushing himself more up by the palm, your hands wrapping around the back of his neck, Jon didn’t even slightly try to pick up the pace. Just watching your eyes, bright and so needing on him as you trusted he was going the pace you both needed. Each time his cock dragging against a sensitive wall inside of you.

You could barley follow his pace, he was going too slow to even have a pace to keep up with. Just barley letting his cock leave you before filling you again, only ever getting slightly better at pulling more out of you each time but it was nothing even close to fast. Your heart felt as full as his cock was inside of you, how much you wished things could be better, but how even though they weren’t he still wasn’t leaving.

You were so scared of him having a bad reaction you never even considered that what if like you, he wanted this too. But he did, he had wanted it longer then you had and suddenly did you raise your head up to meet his lips with yours. Just as slow but deep he also kissed you, no longer even what could he called thrusting, more like a gentle grinding as Jon lowered his body to rest against yours. Reaching for one of your hands by his hair, and raising it up to rest against the pillow beside your head.

Fingers intertwining together, he rolled his lips into yours again and again, not even sounds being made aside from how obvious it was his cock was sinking inside your soaked cunt. He didn’t need to leave your kiss to say it again for you to feel his intention. He wanted to promise you again, it would be alright. You two would figure it out together.

Even now, you the firstborn daughter of an old family from a once highborn nobility, and he a bastard from a family much the same fin the passed. Unmarried and now pregnant, but these weren’t those days. The pressure was on you, on your mind, on your insecurities, not him or his life. You were together and there was no one hating that, and the only ones who might had nothing to do with either of your lives at this point.

They didn’t matter, only you two right now mattered. For everything you felt afraid of and still did, Jon didn’t. He felt confident for you both, and no matter what would happen to you and your life in the worst coming ways you knew, Jon wouldn’t leave, and thats all you could ask for.

That time, when you came close to your orgasm, Jon didn’t stop you. He didn’t hold back or change pace. Just gently let his cock slide in and out of your cunt as he kissed you, and his hands intertwined with yours. He silently let you cum, and he filled you more and more not long after. Only, he didn’t stop. As if he could get you pregnant again right here, Jon pulled every single orgasm he could out of you as long as he still had seed to spill deep inside of you.

Maybe there wasn’t much hope, but it was something.

It was late enough as Jon very carefully pulled himself up from bed. Always watching with eyes like a hawk that you wouldn’t wake up on him, not wishing to disturb your sleep. Especially now. For a moment he hadn’t even gotten up, he just watched you. The love of his life, the girl he had been so deeply in love with the moment he laid eyes on you.

He couldn’t imagine a world where he’d reject you. Not want this with you. The heartbreaking fact that you had been so scared he didn’t want this, that you started to cry the moment you realized he had found the pregnancy test and results. That you had been so scared you were willing to go against what you wanted, and drink moontea either without him knowing or at his order just to try and keep him. But he’d wanted this for a long time. Longer then Tormund had put it into his head, but thats when it exploded.

That was when Jons head went into overdrive. And even moreso, he had everything prepared too. He had thought long in the future, but it was now. The now he wanted was here and it was a pure accident. Or, so Jon thought. His thumb running along your cheek as you slept, he thought maybe this accident was on purpose. Not by you nor him, but the old gods giving Jon a chance at a life he always wanted, always tried asking for without the bravery to put it into words.

You just so happened to forget your birth control on the night he fucked you after Dickon Tarly’s wedding. The one where he didn’t even let you cum because he needed some control over his thoughts and the darkest wouldn’t slip out if he controlled that. And you let him.

He hadn’t let you cum that night, nor the next, nor even before he went north again. The last night he made you cum, was when he truly put a baby in you, and the next night he made you cum was tonight, the night he found out you were indeed pregnant. It all was looking like pieces fitting together for the first time in his life. But Jon had one more thing to get. Or two. Looking at the time, if he left now, he could get there and back in two hours at most and you’d still be fast asleep and not know he was gone.

Dragging on his jeans, Jon threw a shirt before turning back. Leaning down, through the fur atop his bed his hand sought our your stomach. A tiny press just to let the little one know he was there, as the other ran along your hair at the top of your head before leaving a kiss to your forehead. There and back and he wouldn’t even have to worry you he was gone.

The brothers on night duty were beyond baffled. Rarely did Jon show up in the middle of the night, and never before had they never seen him out of uniform. His hair haphazardly thrown back to keep it out of his face too, he didn’t look the put together he always did here. Grenn was sitting up on one of the desks by the other side of the room where his desk was, chatting with Dareon before noticing him. “Jon?” Hopping down he was as confused as he was amused looking at his state, “What in seven hells are you doing here? Thought you hated night duty.”

Rounding over to his desk, Jon pulled the key out he used to keep everything in his top drawer safe when he wasn’t there, now that something very valuable and which cost a significant amount of gold to buy couldn’t be lost. “I’m just picking something up.”

His head shot up though at Grenns words, “Oh you mean the engagement ring we’ve all pretended not to know you’re hiding here?” A laugh as he patted Jon on the arm, leaning against Sams desk next to Jons. “We all know. Everyone here knows you’ve been keeping it a secret.” Jons brows narrowed at how, only for Grenn to relent right away. “Sam told Edd, Edd mentioned it to Hobb-”

Sighing as his head dropped, he hissed out. “Now everyone knows.” No use trying to be subtle, Jon unlocked the drawer, grabbing the ring and putting it in his pocket. He could read the question on Grenns face, “She doesn’t care if it’s in a box or anything. The ring’s the only thing that matters.”

Standing back up, Jon let his hands brace against the back of his chair, legs bent backwards a bit as if to stretch just the slightest from the nerves. That time Grenn was genuinely just curious. “Why the rush to grab it now? It’s the middle of the night.” Jon didn’t answer, only a small glance to the side at him before looking away, the guilt right on his face that he wasn’t going to be able to hide this one. “She’s not...” Jon closed his eyes, and nodded yes. Grenn would realize it even if he denied it, he wasn’t an idiot. “Gods be good, your girls pregnant?”

Nodding again, Jon pushed up about to tell him to keep his voice down, but leave it to his brothers when the Lord Commander nor Ser Alliser were around to be rowdy. All surrounding him asking the same news, and it was out. There was no stopping it now, all he could do was ask them not to tell anyone yet, that his family didn’t know and he didn’t want them finding out because one of them opened their mouths.

Already he was going to have to have a talk with Sam about keeping secrets.

It took longer then he thought to even get out of there, all of them congratulating him trying to get him to stay and at least celebrate but he needed to get back to you before you woke up and thought he left you. He did, but you’d worry it meant something far more horrible then he ever wanted. But, the house wasn’t completely dark when he got back. And he knew he wasn’t getting inside to you just yet.

Back resting against the small front porch, arms crossed over his chest with a single outside light on to signify he was even there waiting, Jon very slowly got out of the car, slinging a bag over his shoulder, carrying the plush he was also going to suprise you with, two gifts in one go. But, he wasn’t getting through that door in silence.

In Robbs head, he had more then enough red flags going off that on any other man, he’d have never let him get this far. But he only gave that grace because it was his own brother, but this was a step too far. You begged it was an accident, and he believed you without a doubt. You would never do that on purpose, but Jon? Robb no longer was so sure that Jon hadn’t done this on purpose, and one way or another here and now, he was going to get an answer.

“You better have a good reason to convince me why this is all just a complete coincidence, Snow.”

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