#Please let Lilia Calderu live please please please

[rippersz]

𝘍𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘰𝘧 𝘞𝘢𝘯𝘥𝘴

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(Lilia Calderu x Fem!Witchy!Reader) (NSFW Themes; Mostly fluff) (~9.1k words)

You are Lilia Calderu's roommate. You celebrate Christmas. Also, you are so undeniably, completely, totally, hopelessly, unbelievably (but also very believably) in love with her. Poor you.

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You wanted her. 

You wanted her so bad. 

Since the very day you met her, you wanted her. 

You wanted to hold her hand. You wanted to kiss her. You wanted to wake up next to her. 

Was that a crazy thing to say? A crazy thing to think? To want your boss/roommate like you wanted your boss/roommate? Maybe. Probably. But no one ever said matters of the heart led down a road of sanity—so how on Earth could you be blamed? 

Short answer: You couldn’t.

Not when the woman you wanted was as wise, as intelligent, as kooky, as beautiful, as charming as Lilia Murgo Calderu. An interpreter of the divine - and to you, all divine within herself. 

Even when she’d just woken up, dreams still swimming behind her eyes, orange slippers on her feet as she shuffled around the kitchen. Even when she took her time brewing tea, fixing her hair, humming quietly to herself. Even when she looked up to acknowledge you with a good morning and a lazy wave of her hand, to which you always responded with a smile and a chuckle because honestly you found her early-morning demeanour to be quite endearing. Even with the bags under her hazel eyes and the exhaustion of a terrible night weighing on her shoulders. Even when she rarely slept peacefully and then spent the entire next day getting lost within her thoughts. Even when she screamed in her sleep, cried out for help, yelped from a phantom pain. You ran to her on those nights, practically flying out of your room to find her tossing and turning in her bed, and always stumbled in the dark over to her side. Even when she was overtaken by nightmares, by visions and ‘possessions’, by people speaking through her and people speaking to her. Even then, when she was at her most volatile, with golden wicks of magic sparking along her knuckles and her fingertips, still harnessing power in her dreams, you scrambled to take her hands. To hold them gently. To pry them from their fists and smooth them with your touches.

“Lilia,” you’d whisper, heart pounding and touch soft, “Lilia you have to wake up now, you’re going to hurt yourself sweetheart.” And by then, she’d already be mid-gasp, shooting up in bed, looking around the room wildly before settling on you. 

Always you. Always at her side. Always willing to help. Her assistant, her roommate, the young woman everyone saw her around town with. The one who, perhaps, understood her more than anyone ever had before. 

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“Oooo,” you smiled, led by your nose through the door that separated the front of the shop from the back of the flat, whisked along easily by the smell of food. “This looks amazing..” 

The spoon poised to the right of the stove, already dirty with the tomato and meat from the cooking pasta, was quickly picked up by your hand and dipped back into the pot. 

“Lilia you are a godsend,” you whispered to yourself, bringing the spoon (heaped with bolognese) up to your mouth, already closing your eyes before anything could land on your tongue. 

“Aht!” A sharp voice cut through your bliss, followed by a small smack and sting on the back of your knuckles as the devil herself walked up to your side and hip-bumped you away from the stove. “No tasting before it’s ready!” She scolded, taking the spoon right out of your hold and pushing it back into the pasta to stir.

“Hey!” You protested instantly, lightly shoving her back as you pressed yourself to her side and looked over the pot. She was warm, soft, and you felt your heart jump at the scent of her bourbon and wildflower perfume. “Gimme some now,” you teased, reaching over her for the spoon. 

“Can’t you wait for five minutes!?” Lilia said loudly, shooting you a glare out of the corner of her eye as she moved her body and elbowed you away again. 

“Ow- that hurt!” You cradled your belly. It didn’t, not at all, but you loved to add fuel to the fire. 

Unfortunately, the fire had all the fuel she needed. “Good!” Lilia quipped, putting the spoon back into place in its holder, “I’m glad!” 

You tried hard to hide the smile on your lips and the desperate giggles that wanted to fly out, but you couldn’t help yourself. 

“So mean to me…,” came your laughter-laden lament as you moved to the table in the centre of the room. “Making me set the table, too.” You shook your head and let out a sigh that was much too loud, exaggerating the mope in your shoulders and the dragging of your feet while you moved around the room to get bowls and cutlery. “This is illegal, I think.” 

A snort came from the stove, making you glance up just in time to see the smirk on red lips before she turned her head away to the spice cabinet. “Oh yeah? Who you gonna call? Ghostbusters?” 

“The police.” You set the bowls down quietly and gave her a scoffing ‘duh’ to follow up. 

“Oh please.” Lilia shook her head, sending grey and silver curls swishing around her neck, “The police will take one look at you and give you back.” 

You paused at the drawer, a fork already in your hand, and whipped around with a gasp. “Did you just call me ugly?” You looked quite affronted, mouth agape, eyebrows furrowed, one foot already pointed out to tap rapidly on the floor. 

“Is that what I said?” She shot back, spinning in her place to give you a look in return. Eyebrows raised, tone sarcastic, casting beautiful coffee eyes over the length of your body to prove her point. In the face of that gaze, intense in all its flawless effort, you had to control the sudden hot feeling that spread across your cheeks.

“That’s what I gathered,” you pointed out, sheepish beneath the weight of her full attention, and ducked your head to rifle through the drawer, “And you like to imply things.” You bumped it shut when you found another fork. 

“Oh yeah?” Lilia huffed. “Well you like to accuse. So put that in your pipe.”

“And smoke it.” You spat, smiling.

“Exactly!” 

The two of you laughed, creating a joyful harmony as you finished setting up the table and went to turn down some of the lights. Lilia, in the meanwhile, added the finishing touches to the pasta and donned tarot-themed oven mitts (which you gifted her last year for Christmas after her others were accidentally set on fire) to carry the pot to its trivet. 

“Careful,” came your soft call as you double-checked the lock on the flat door. 

“Hmm,” Lilia hummed, slipping the mitts off and throwing them on the countertop. “Come sit, I’m starving.” 

“Shoulda cooked earlier then,” you teased, practically skipping over to the table to pull out her chair. 

“Shoulda, coulda, woulda,” she waved her hand and rolled her eyes before taking her seat, falling into your familiar routine.

It was your pleasure, above anything and everything else in life, to make Lilia Calderu’s days as smooth and bright as possible. You made breakfast, you helped clean up, you always pulled out her chair for her and always beat her to the dishes, and at night, you turned down the lights before heading off to your own room. It was small, decorated to suit you, and totally unnecessary. You’d insisted in the beginning of your stay that Lilia have it instead, because it had a door and was less open-spacey, but she brushed it off and said that she was already comfortable in her little pull-out bed. You didn’t enjoy the thought of it, not with the way her back hurt sometimes, but it was nothing a good spot of healing tea couldn’t fix—or so she claimed. You also learned early on that Lilia was neat, careful, and entirely against rushing. She did not like to rush. Nor did she like to argue, or raise her voice when angry, or get angry in the first place. And she didn’t like sleeping in too much and she didn’t like cold showers and she didn’t like when you didn’t respond to her texts (which happened maybe two times and both times you got an earful). But you never minded the things she didn’t like. You made sure to work on time-management, to avoid rushing, and you never got angry with her, only frustrated, and you never yelled at her (because you were quite sure that you’d rather be stabbed then ever do so), and you woke her up before her late alarm and only let her sleep in if she had a rough night, and you never used too much of the hot water, and you kept your phone ringer on whenever you left the shop, and all of the things she needed you to make space for, you did. You gave her privacy, you gave her an ear, a shoulder, you gave her gifts and you gave her attention and you gave her banter and jokes and stability and routine and beneath it all, every time you smiled at her, every time you both sat down in the armchairs to read your books, every time you stayed up late to listen to her rant about the world’s offences against witches, you were also giving her your heart. 

Happily, gladly, giving her your heart. 

“My compliments to the chef,” you grinned as you took your spot opposite her, putting your napkin on your lap as though you were in a fancy restaurant. 

“Mm, let me know if it’s too salty,” she ran her tongue over her teeth before grabbing your bowl, sliding it closer, and starting to dish up. 

You couldn’t help the way you looked at her, keeping one elbow on the table, holding your chin with the cup of your hand, admiring the way she moved. There was a specialness to it, a gracefulness found only in someone like Lilia. Even the way she put homemade pasta into your bowl, even the way she gave you a hefty helping, to make sure you ate properly, and even the way she slid it back to you with a small smile. The way the dim lights darkened her eyes, the way she focused on her own food, the way she shifted to get comfortable. 

Your heart felt just about ready to burst from your chest. 

“It’s perfect,” was the only thing you could say after you had your first bite; a common phrase in your combined household because Lilia was a fantastic cook. 

“Eh. Not bad,” she shrugged, but after her first bowl was finished, you smirked as you watched her grab another helping. 

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At first, living together was a bit awkward. 

You were still a juvenile witch, having learned as much as you could from your previous mentor before she suggested Lilia as a continued source of help; and the last thing you expected when stumbling into Madame Calderu’s for the first time was the key to a future filled with the best of fortunes. You never got your palm read, never had her look into a crystal ball for you and pretend to know dead relatives, but still you were certain—your future was the best future one could have. There was a roof over your head, food at your table, books at your fingertips, and Lilia Calderu at your side. There was nothing more to want. 

Though in the beginning, that wasn’t the case. 

You tiptoed around her as though you were scared she was going to smite you down with all the power of the Divine Mother if you stepped out of line. You were the quietest, kindest, most endearing soul you could ever be—all in an effort to avoid being thrown out on your ass. But when you recognised Lilia’s way of living, how some larger part of her didn’t seem to really mind your presence at all, you began to settle. You lingered in shared spaces, you asked both the boring and exciting questions, and the tension in your shoulders faded. Sleeping came easier, smiling was instinct, and when you heard Lilia laugh at one of your jokes for the first time, you knew there was nothing in the world that could take you away from her home. 

Her home which eventually became yours, but which would always be hers no matter what she claimed. 

It was Lilia’s flat, your presence. 

It was Lilia’s life, you tagging along. 

It was Lilia’s heart, you left at the outskirts, mingling with the other acquaintances and friends (not that there were many, but still. Not in the inner circle of Lilia’s Inferno.) 

And in your life, in your heart, she was at the very centre, embedded in everything you did. 

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“Merry Christmas!!” Your excited yell bounced off the walls, obnoxiously loud and announcing your entrance before you skated into the living room in fuzzy socks and holiday-themed pyjamas. 

The only answer that greeted you was a low gravelly groan, muffled by the press of Lilia’s face into her sheets. And on top of her head, squishing her beloved curls? A pillow. 

“Wake up now, Madame Calderu! It’s time to celebrate!” You sang, taking in the air of your shared flat. 

It was decorated beautifully, with lights along the cabinets, a fake purple tree in the corner, and other little festive trinkets you found in thrift shops, dotted around any flat surface there was. Dancing snowmen, a penguin with an ‘I love you’ sign (a symbol of your devotion, as subtle as you could make it), two stockings hung on the wall beside the tree, each of your initials sewn into the fabric. And on the tree itself? Colour-changing lights, baubles and plastic decor, some in the shapes of stars, others in the shapes of the moon’s phases, a few depicting typical witchy symbols (a hat, a little witch on a broom, two that were painted like tarot cards. The Lovers and The World.) Beneath it, there was a red and white tree skirt, fuzzy and dotted with little purple faux-pines, and on top of that, forming a little neat pile, were a few gift-wrapped presents. It was the most wonderful, heart-warming, heart-wrenching thing you had ever seen. You could spot the ones you picked out for Lilia, the gifts you spent so long thinking about, and noticed a few days before Christmas morning that she had matched each one with a wrapped present of her own. The contrast couldn’t have been more obvious; hers were all clad in some shimmery blue iridescent paper you’d never seen before in your life and yours were dressed up in a matte red and brown pattern that repeated the scene of a little bear in a Santa hat reading a book. 

You didn’t expect the presents to be there, in fact you didn’t really expect anything from her at all, and yet there they sat, adding to your pile of four. Four gifts for her and then, because she really was the softest person at heart, four gifts for you. As a thank you that evening, you’d made dinner - sweet potato chilli and slices of fresh bread. She loved it, but still you felt that a simple meal wasn’t a big enough show of gratitude. 

Christmas morning pancakes, however, would make a stunning addition to the ‘thank you’ list, especially as they were Lilia’s favourite. Two with chocolate chips and two with blueberries (though you always made at least one extra of each just in case). And beside that, a mug of herbal tea and beside that, a mug of hot chocolate. You were dead silent as you worked, trying hard to give the resident witch at least a few more minutes of peaceful sleep before you woke her up for a proper celebration. It was hard to contain the excitement, the lightning in your veins as you anticipated the rest of the day. The company, the warmth, the movies you’d watch, the books you’d read. The shop was closed, partly because the roads were full of unpaved snow, but also because you were not going to be waiting for customers on Christmas Day. You wouldn’t allow it, and eventually Lilia agreed. It was unlikely anyone would go looking for a palm reading anyway, not in that chill. Plus they all had other things to do as well, like spend time with family and cuddle up with their kids and their lovers and hold their wives and drink wine with their lovers and their wives and eat biscuits with their wives and kiss their wives and open gifts with their beautiful wives and ugh! Well. 

There were still gifts to open, gifts that you’d cherish no matter what they were. Even if Lilia got you the most basic things, like socks or a new body lotion or a water bottle, you’d wear them every day, you’d put it all over your hands, you’d never drink from anything else ever again. To even be in her busy head enough to receive a gift felt like an honour, and that was such a strange sentiment for someone you loved, putting her on a pedestal, but you were past the point of caring. Lilia Calderu was no perfect woman, you knew that more than anyone, but she wasn’t trying to be. Her kindness was taught, learned, maintained, and you weren’t sure which Gods you pleased enough to deserve it, but not a day went by where her care was overlooked. So all you could do was return the favour. 

“Merry Christmas indeed,” came a sudden rumbling purr over your shoulder, husky with sleep and tinged with amusement as Lilia shuffled her way up to the counter. 

You gave her a glance, taking in the robe around her shoulders, the colourful pattern of her nightgown, the slippers on her feet, and the sweet smirk on her lips, and could only smile when the heavy weight of her head leaned itself against your shoulder. Her curls tickled your neck a little, tied up as they were, but you had no complaints. She was warm, comforting, and still a bit tired. You would always be her headrest if that’s what she needed.

“Did you sleep well?” It was compulsory for you to ask, a habit you fell into as soon as you felt comfortable in the flat. Checking on Lilia was a common occurrence, though you only asked about sleep after she went through the night without waking up in a fit. The evening before had been quiet, so you had high hopes.

“Like a babe. What about you?” And that was the typical response, bringing a soft smile to your lips as you slid the mug of tea over to her. 

“Likewise, though I fell asleep to a delightful little playlist called Lilia’s snoring.” 

She gasped. “How dare you? I do not snore.” Wide coffee eyes looked at you, shocked, and one hand, devoid of decorative rings, playfully swiped at your arm. “Maybe you were hearing your own.” Lilia sassed before she hid her growing smirk behind her mug.

“Oh yeah right,” you rolled your eyes, moving away to shimmy the last pancake onto the small stack. “Let’s just go with that.” 

Lilia snorted and took her chance then to dip into the bathroom, still intent on completing her morning routine before eating. You got to setting the table, putting the pancakes on each plate and the rest on a separate one off to the side, placing Lilia’s favourite fork and knife beside her dish (they were made for her a while ago, complete with engraved gems and smoothed symbols, the only surviving two out of a full set), and completed the table with your mugs. It looked a bit romantic, as it always did when it was just the two of you sitting at your little kitchen table, but over the course of your time together, neither of you mentioned it. Once, in the beginning of your routine, you lit a candle and placed it in the centre of the table arrangement, and promptly promised yourself never to do so again. For as soon as Lilia sat down, embraced by the flame’s flickering light and short warmth, you felt your cheeks grow hot. She looked unbelievably handsome that evening, meeting smouldering eyes over the candlelight, showing off the shadows of her wizened face, and you were overcome with the distinct desire to lunge across the table and kiss her senseless. 

Fortunately for your friendship, you never did. And unfortunately for your friendship, the urge to do so only got worse. From kissing to holding, from holding to loving, from loving to fucking. You couldn’t help yourself, couldn’t control the flutter of your heart, but there was nothing to be done. Lilia was your roommate, your mentor, the woman who laughed with you and cried with you and consoled you when you were on your period and needed a shoulder. She wasn’t the woman you kissed or the woman you held or the woman you fucked and in all seriousness, you knew that she probably never would be. And although that thought came with its own sense of pain, its own sorrow and bone-breaking ache, it was also followed by relief. If you weren’t close enough for that, then you weren’t close enough to break each other’s hearts. So there was no need to fear, no need to worry, and if ever there came a day where Lilia found someone to be with her for good, then you would be happy. You would be happy. For her, for the woman you found yourself loving, you would be happy.

And speak of the witch, the sound of the bathroom door creaking open, followed by soft footsteps, broke you out of your staring contest with the counter. 

“Thank you for breakfast,” she said airily, fresh-faced with a small bit of makeup, a spritz of perfume, and a better style for her unruly curls. You nodded, almost in a bow, as you slid her seat out for her and gently pushed her back in. 

“It’s always my pleasure. Especially today.” You knew your eyes were shining, pouring with Christmas glee, but Lilia didn’t seem to mind the excitement. 

Ever since the beginning of December rolled around, she’d been happy to help you decorate. She took the time to hang lights with you, standing on the tips of her toes to give you the string as you circled it around the tree, then she spent the second evening of her December dotting it with decorations, inspecting the ornaments and baubles as she went, and she even bought a wreath to hang from the inside of the front door. You felt as though your heart was going to crawl out of your chest, it was so full of light and love. And at the end of the evening, when she affixed the Triple Goddess’ symbol to the top of your purple tree instead of an angel, and whispered a quick, happy, “Four of Wands” to you when she settled back on her feet, you couldn’t help but wrap her up in a hug. If that’s what her heart told her, if that’s what the divine whispered, an upright Four of Wands, then who were you to dictate? The higher powers were more right that evening than they had ever been before: in that moment, everything was Four of Wands. 

And while you ate a silent breakfast across from Lilia Calderu, enjoying the warmth and taste of your meal, taking in the slight chill of the morning and the beautiful image of her lounging in her nightie and robe, everything felt like Four of Wands all over again.

“You know I didn’t expect you to get me anything,” you finally murmured, hiding your eyes as you sipped from your mug. “It wasn’t supposed to be an eye for an eye sort of thing.” 

Lilia finished her bite, licked the side of her mouth, and raised an eyebrow. “So you expected me to be the only one opening gifts on Christmas morning? I don’t even celebrate Christmas. Why would I leave you empty handed?” 

You shrugged, already feeling the beginnings of warmth taking over your cheeks. You knew she didn’t celebrate - and technically you weren’t inclined to do so either, but the holiday cheer always got to you. And she had been so patient, going along with your joy. “I just assumed- I dunno…. We didn’t do it for each other the past two years, and exactly. You don’t celebrate. So I hope you know that just because I got you things-”

“Wait wait wait wait, stop right there.” Lilia cut you off, waving her hands a little bit, forcing your avoidant eyes from your plate up to her face. Her expression was strange, serious mixed with a distinct shadow of outrage, brick-red lips set into a frown; but behind her chocolate eyes? All you could see was warmth. “Before you even go any further, I’ll have you know that I did not feel obligated to get you Christmas presents just because you got some for me, and I certainly didn’t do it because I felt sympathetic.” 

You opened your mouth, ready to interrupt, but were quickly shut down by a held-up palm and a stern look. Your jaw clicked shut.

“I did it because I wanted to.” She held your eyes. “I did it because I didn’t want you to be celebrating alone and although it has been a long time since I last celebrated the holidays, I have to tell you that this has been very nice.” Lilia nodded at you, her lips tilting up into a smile, and she watched with delight as you couldn’t help but mirror it. “It’s been nice, right?” 

“Yeah,” you nodded, resisting the urge to shyly duck away, “yeah it’s been nice.” 

“And that is precisely why I did it. Because this is the kind of atmosphere every home should have,” she spread her hands out, breaking away to look around your living room with pride and care, taking in the purposefully mis-coloured tree, the lights and ornaments, the gifts, the holiday trinkets, the stockings, the sight of your books mixed with her books in the shelf, your shoes next to her shoes by the front door, your notes stuck to the fridge, your handwriting on the wall calendar, the TV you bought a little while ago, the paintings you hung up, the food that you made for her and dished for her and placed beside her favourite knife and fork, the drinks you prepared, the look in your eyes… And when she brought her attention back to you then, you almost cracked right in half when she leaned forward as though she were going to tell you a secret and said, in a playful whisper with a smirk on her face, “And there is no other person I would rather celebrate with.” 

You were so thankful she couldn’t read minds. 

“Okay?” She nodded as a reassurance and you returned it without hesitation. 

“Okay. Thank you…,” you breathed, shuddery and annoying, so out of tune, but when she looked at you in the way she did, when she spoke so gently, so firmly, you simply weren’t sure how you could’ve regained your footing sooner. “I- I appreciate it.” 

“I know you do,” Lilia was smug as she leaned back in her seat and crossed one leg over the other while she finished her breakfast.

“Shut up.” 

The response you got was a near-silent huff of laughter. 

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“Okay! Stocking first or presents?” 

You stood in the middle of the room and Lilia sat in the blue armchair, nursing another brewed mug of hot chocolate. You hadn’t taken the chance to change, insisting that Christmas morning gifts were always unwrapped while still in your pyjamas, and Lilia had inclined her head to tell you that the reins were yours before she got cuddled into her seat.

“Let’s start with the big guns. Presents.” 

You nodded, still managing to somehow follow orders, and swiftly crouched beneath the tree, then carefully picked up all four gifts for Lilia and shuffled back to her on your knees. 

“Your gifts, m’lady.” 

“Why thank you,” she smiled, looked down at you with those heavy-lidded eyes, stroking the fire in your heart, and put her mug off to the side before holding her hands out and taking the wrapped presents into her lap. They weren’t very big, one of them wasn’t even a box, so she had no trouble balancing as you quickly turned around to grab your own. 

“Right,” once you were settled at her feet on the floor, cross-legged and acutely aware of how close you were, you set the boxes down in front of you and clapped your hands. “You go first, then me, then you, then me. Deal?” 

“What if I want you to go first?” One dark eyebrow raised, adding to the wicked pleasure of a dark-lipped smirk, and you instantly tried playing off your fluster with a shrug. 

“Then I will. Is that what you’d like, Madame Calderu?” Only used in moments of teasing, you enjoyed seeing the slight pink that went to Lilia’s cheeks as she heard you use her unofficial official title. Despite it being the name of her shop, it was rare that a customer addressed her as so. In time then, she only came to associate it with you. 

“Yeah, why not,” Lilia shrugged, and you instantly picked up the first gift nearest to you. 

“Can I shake it?” You grinned.

“If you’re interested in breaking things, be my guest.” 

“Mmm, no thank you,” came your little murmur as you carefully (trying to hide your eagerness) undid the wrapping. It was a long box, thin, and as the gift was revealed and the paper fell off to the floor, you felt your heart stutter. Clearly, it was jewellery. And clearly, you had to open it. But the front caught your eye, stalling you, and you took in the small golden cursive L. with interest. “Did you make this?” You whispered, shifting the box to hold it like precious gems. 

“Open it first, ask questions later,” you didn’t have to look up to know she was smiling, so you did what was desired. 

The top came off with little resistance and suddenly you were looking down at a necklace. A familiar necklace. Familiar and yet different. Made of smaller beads with similar colours, more delicate and fitting to your less loud aesthetic, but with the same rectangular shaped pendant in the centre. You nearly folded yourself in half looking closer, feeling your heart in your throat when you recognized that yes, it was like Lilia’s, but it wasn’t meant to be a replica - it was meant to match. Two hands against a white background hovered above and below a sun with an open eye, fitting the same mould, but Lilia’s hands were an iridescent blue-green, the top one pointing down from the right and the bottom pointing palm-up from the left. Yours was in complete contrast. A deep blue background, opal coloured hands, the top one pointing down from the left, the bottom pointing up from the right, and the sun in the middle was not a sun at all but a full moon, painted white, the eye’s iris a dark midnight blue. It was perfect in a way you could not even voice, hand-crafted with so much care, and you looked up at Lilia as though she herself had the bright idea to create the sun and moon and hang them both in the sky. 

“I- this is- Lilia…,” you swallowed, glancing at the necklace resting against her chest before looking down at its partner in your hands. “Holy shit, Lilia.” 

“Here, let me help you put it on.” She flapped her hands to gesture you forward and forward you went, placing the box aside and taking the necklace out with the gentlest touch. When you turned and she slung it around your neck, the jewellery was cold, but her hands were warm, and in seconds you were suddenly matching with the woman you loved. 

“...I feel like I’m part of your coven now,” you whispered while looking down, stroking it with reverence. 

“Ha!” Lilia cackled, her smile brighter than fresh snow in the sun. “You don’t want to be part of my coven, kiddo,” she took a sip of her tea. 

A very mean, insecure voice in the pit of your mind hissed at the sound of that nickname. It always incited a wild, twisting fire inside you. You hated to be reminded of your age, of the differences between you, because it always served as a symbol of what could never be. Coming to terms with unrequited love was one thing, but having the reason why it was unrequited spoken to your face so boldly, even without intent to do so, was a different beast entirely. You could handle the sadness when not reminded of its roots, but a quick ‘kiddo’ or ‘kid’ or reference to age spoken from Lilia’s lips had you instantly defensive. Of course you never showed it, never in front of her, but that didn’t mean the punch to your psyche didn’t hurt like a bitch. 

“Yes, I do.” You insisted, moving the opened box and wrapping paper out of the way. “Of course I do. Lilia Calderu’s coven? Sign me the fuck up right now.” 

She huffed, put her mug down, and turned back to her own gifts. “Shall I?” 

“You shall.” 

The first one she picked up was the squishy one, soft and medium sized, and you delighted in the way her brows furrowed as she pressed it between her fingers. Three seconds later, when the paper was torn off (just as gently as you did it, you noted), a small gasp, followed by a rich laugh, filled the air. 

“Oh, you shouldn’t have,” Lilia grinned as she picked up the oven mitts and slipped them onto her hands. It was a cute addition to your running joke. Only a few months before that moment, Lilia had somehow accidentally set her old oven mitts on fire. Bright flame and all. It was a miracle how you got there just before the smoke detectors went off and managed to throw the things outside before dousing them in water. They were still on her hands too! You’d nearly had a heart attack, staring at her with eyes so wide it gave you a headache as you ignored the half-charred mitts and held her palms. Lilia insisted she was okay as you inspected them, but she never pulled away and she didn’t protest when you asked her to please run them under cold water for a few minutes. Since then, the only ‘oven mitts’ she had were dish towels and every time you meant to buy replacements, you procrastinated or you forgot. That simply wouldn’t do—thus, the tarot card themed oven mitts she had on her hands, waving them around and pinching her thumb to her fingers with satisfaction. 

“These are lovely. Thank you,” her voice was liquid gold with gratitude as she finally slipped them off and gently set them on the table, giving them a pat for good measure. 

“Yeah, I thought you might have needed some,” you smirked and gladly accepted the small playful slipper-covered kick you got to the knee. “Now my turn again.” 

The next gift was softer than a box, but shaped like one, with a weird hard lump on the front, and once you got the wrapping paper off, your face almost split in half with the width of your smile. 

“This looks so beautiful, oh my god,” your left hand stroked and fiddled with the pendant at your neck, holding it as a newfound comfort while your right hand explored the leather-bound notebook you found in your lap. The lump you felt on the front was a sewn-in gem, coloured gold and orange, and you felt warm with the thought that it reminded you so much of Lilia’s magical tint. “Thank you Lilia.. I promise you it won’t go to waste.” 

Her eyes were shining proudly when you looked up at her, and you noticed the quick glance away from your collarbone to the book in your lap. She must have thought the necklace was just as beautiful as you did. 

“It better not, or I’ll take it back,” she teased, humming a soft sound of agreement as you marvelled at the fraying, fabric pages. 

“No chance. Now open your next one, please.” The notebook was gently set aside after you re-clasped the metal hinge. 

As Lilia picked up one of the smaller boxes, harder than the oven mitts, and began unwrapping, you briefly wondered about what you were going to put in the new journal. There were no lines, so it was perfect for sketching, but at the same time you hadn’t kept a diary in so long and it was the perfect opportunity, accompanied by the most perfect feeling. Making use of something a loved one had given you. And you would make use of it, without a doubt you would. 

“Is this a book of spells?” Lilia asked, turning the little brown book over in her hands with a furrowed brow and a confused smile. 

You straightened up and shuffled closer to her knees, practically putting your chin in her lap when you excitedly reached up to hold it open for her. “That’s exactly what it is, yes. I had to get a bit of help from Elise, but…,” you bit your lip, suddenly shy at all the effort you’d put into contacting your mentor. She agreed to help because she loved you, but that didn’t mean she hadn’t teased, and as you looked up at Lilia then, staring into dark enchanting eyes, you felt a blush roll over your cheeks. “...It’s um- it’s little obscure spells. For like cleaning and mending and things. I think there’s one in there for even stitching stars? Just stars? And a few others. Shining copper, cleaning lipstick off of glass…,” you trailed off, watching as Lilia hummed and took the book from you again. 

She took a moment to flip through the pages and read the small descriptions, taking the time to react to each one in kind. And when she got to the end, going a bit faster in her perusing, she suddenly stopped. You paused just as she paused and watched, with confusion, as her eyebrows promptly shot up.

“You think I need an.. ‘overstimulating orgasm’?” 

….

“Excuse me?” 

You went still. 

Lilia’s eyes bounced from you to the page and back again before she turned it around on her lap, nonverbally forcing you to read it. 

And there, in your mentor’s handwriting, were the cursive words, “Spell for a Very Special Feeling”. 

And beneath it, in smaller print:

‘Do your wrists ever get tired? Your hands? Are you eager for a satisfying night in? A chance to really release your frustrations without doing the work yourself? I know just the spell.

Completing the steps below will result in a release like no other. It will burn, it will feel painful, but the pleasure will override the ache and in no time at all, you will find yourself feeling delightfully… overstimulated. No tiring hours of doing it yourself! No chickening out! Give it a try maybe once. Or twice. As many times as your body can take.’ 

And a diagram showing hand movements, followed by a chant to go along with it. 

That motherfucker!

“Judging by your expression, I’m guessing you didn’t look through this thoroughly before you wrapped it for me?” Lilia smirked, cheeks growing pinker the longer you stared at the writing in complete and utter shock. 

It took you a good second to react and then another two seconds to respond. You were quick to reach out and grab the book, wanting to look through it properly to avoid any other utterly embarrassing miscommunications, but Lilia yanked it back before you could. 

“Too late,” she shook her head, and you floundered. 

“N-no! That is not supposed to say that, I swear. I would never- that- Elise wrote them all! I approved them! I don’t even know how- why-” 

Lilia raised one of her palms, cutting your sentence right in half, and you fell quiet as she smiled. 

“She must’ve slipped it in. I think she’s trying to tell me something,” the book went flipping back and forth between her palms and you sighed. 

“I’m really sorry about that, oh my god. It was just supposed to be a cute little gift.” 

“And it is,” Lilia insisted, snapping the book shut with a smirk. “Don’t feel embarrassed. It’s only natural.” You felt something in you shiver when she winked and desperately tried pulling yourself together when she turned to put the little book on the side table. 

Dwelling on the moment, now matter how enticing the idea sounded, was not a very good decision to make. You couldn’t afford to get distracted or blush too hard, but dear lord it seemed to be an impossible feat - especially with the image of Lilia in your head. Panting, blushing, hands gripping her sheets… the same hands, soft hands, with delicate wrinkles and perfect nails, just the right length and just the right width and so deceptively strong, no matter how feminine they seemed… the same hands she used to do her sewing, her cooking, her readings, her hair… the same hands she used to thread two fingers through the curve of her mug’s handle… oh in much the same way you wished they could curve into- no. 

No. 

You wrenched your eyes away, declining the draw of lust, and picked up the next gift on autopilot. As you tried emptying your head, the wrapping paper fell apart under your wandering hands, and soon you were staring down at what seemed to be a box of tarot cards. A very unique box of tarot cards with unique drawings, sequences, and detailing - art nouveau inspired. One of your favourites. 

“I don’t have this set yet…,” you breathed, drifting your fingertips over the glossy cover of the box like it was your Bible. 

“I know.” She hummed, still drinking from her hot chocolate, watching you with curiosity.  

Tarot set collecting somehow became your combined hobby over the years, although your preferences differed so as to not have any duplicates. Lilia had a set she used only for the shop, one that didn’t hold the same sentimental value as the few others she had, and you displayed your decks on the empty surface of your dresser. Lilia rarely got new ones, she was quite connected to the five that she already had, they all held different meanings, and you only enjoyed splurging when you saw ones that were really incredible. Your next gift was a surprise for Lilia, it would bump her deck number up to six, and you smiled softly as you slid the top off of the decorative box and swiftly counted the cards as the tenth addition to your collection. 

“These are gorgeous. Where did you get them?” You couldn’t tear your eyes away. 

“A witch never tells,” Lilia put two fingers to her pursed lips and though you didn’t look up to see it, you still huffed at her words. 

“Well can a witch accept a thank you?” 

“She can,” your roommate acquiesced, giving you a heartfelt “You’re welcome” when you thanked her on the spot. 

“I will say I think you and I had the same idea,” you admitted when Lilia got around to opening her next gift. She raised quizzical eyebrows as she looked down at the box in her hands, and you watched with glee as her lips parted in surprise. “We know each other so well.” 

“It appears we do…,” she murmured low beneath her breath before she tossed the wrapping paper down to you and gave the box a proper look.

It was medium sized, wooden, hand painted, and carved. On the front, there was a rather uncanny all-black cameo of Lilia’s side profile. It was perfect, from the shelf of her brow to the distinct curve of her nose down to the gentle slope of her neck, and it was front and centre in the painted format of a tarot card. At the bottom were two words written in your pen, ‘The Divine’. And at all four corners, little details of the sun, moon, Saturn, and stars. Lilia was quiet as she opened the hinged lid, and then she gasped as she came face to face with The Empress. It took her less than a second to realise what you’d done. Her gaze shifted quickly, from every individual stroke to every mark and design, from every corner signature to every line. With slow movements, pouring with awe, The Empress was quickly pushed to the back as Lilia slipped the entire stack out of the box and began fanning them with her fingertips. Her touch was delicate, hovering as she traced outlines and ran her thumb along the curves of the cards. 

“Hand painted,” she said softly and you looked from her to the deck and back again with a nod and a smile. 

“Do you like them?” You didn’t really have to ask, you knew she did, but some part of you was always nervous whenever you did something nice for your roommate. You had to toe the line carefully, balancing being platonic and being romantic, and gifts were, at times, a difficult thing to interpret. You wanted her to enjoy them, to find use in them, to keep them for the rest of her long life just as she had with a bunch of her other souvenirs. If ever she had to leave, flee, or travel somewhere without you, you hoped that she would stop to pack them in with her things first. Or better yet, use them for special occasions. Times where she could tell people that she got that deck of tarot cards from a young woman she once knew, a woman she thought of often with fondness. Maybe a woman who could become her wife one day, though it was such a silly thought you could only shake it out of your head.

“Yes, I like them,” Lilia breathed, eyes still hungrily devouring the details. She looked quite impressed. “These are beautifully done. Thank you.” Her smile felt like a hug around your shoulders when she peered down at you. 

“Oh I- of course…,” you said shyly, resisting the urge to bow your head or look away, and her smile only grew as she turned back to her new deck and began realigning them. You watched her for a moment, seeing her care and appreciation in the way she handled them like fine china, and it was only when the box made a light clink against the side table that you finally snapped out of it.

“Why don’t we open the last ones together?” You suggested, perking up with a renewed sense of interest. The last gift was your personal favourite as it contained the most magic, and since you had yet to find your own physical form of the craft, like Lilia’s golden whisps, it was also the most time consuming. Laborious magic was a true pain in the ass, but you had a little help from your mentor and in only a few days, the gift was complete. You prayed the witch in front of you enjoyed it. 

“Good idea,” she put the wooden box to the side and picked up the last gift.

You mirrored her, then watched as both of you worked at the wrapping paper and revealed your last gifts. 

In your hand, a small unassuming brown box. In Lilia’s, a long Tiffany-blue box. You shared a look and in unison, slid the tops off.

Inside the box, nestled in a soft foam mould, was a simple, smooth, shining Black Tourmaline. It was about the size of the dip in your palm and when you picked it up, your hand dropped just a bit with the weight. You glanced up at Lilia, meeting her eyes over the ledge of her knees, and smiled in confusion. 

“This is gorgeous, but why is it so heavy?” You laughed, holding the gemstone like gold as you slid it between your palms and ran your fingers over the smooth surface. 

“Turn it around,” she responded as she looked down at her own gift and hummed, moving to gently take it out of its own foam mould as though it was made of glass. 

“Oh… woah…” On the other side was an engraving. A symbol. Seven points to a complex star. You’d seen glimpses of it in various books over the years, but it wasn’t among the most common signs in witchcraft, so you never paid it any proper attention. Clearly, to Lilia, you should’ve. 

“It’s a Heptagram. In many religions, its existence is overwhelmingly positive,” Lilia said offhandedly, eyes still glued to her own gift, “and this…,” she twirled it in her fingers, face glimmering with the way the sun shone through the kitchen curtains and caught the light off of one of the shining little bunches, “is a bouquet of hemlock stuck in stasis.” Her vision readjusted, moving past the green of the stems to you, sitting in direct view behind them. You watched as the film of magic made the bunch glow. From certain angles, it seemed as though it stood beneath shining stained glass, casting reds, oranges, yellows, blues, purples, greens, pinks, and whites all in various shades.

“I knew it was a bit on the nose, but it can’t hurt you unless you decide to eat it,” you explained, “Elise helped me cast the spell. It will be like that forever, I’m pretty sure. That’s why it’s shimmering. Pretty, isn’t it?” You smiled, running your fingers over your new stone aimlessly. 

“It’s perfect,” Lilia said warmly, tilting her head with a sweet smile on her face. “Thank you.”

“Of course!” You rushed out, chest almost heaving with the weight of her affection “Now are you going to tell me the meaning behind this stone?” You asked and held it up before your eye, symbol facing her. 

“It’s a protective ward. Throughout the ages, it has come to mean different things to different believers, but I focused my energy into divine protection. As long as it’s with you, anyone with bad intentions will turn the other way,” she explained in her teacher voice, speaking matter-of-factly.

You blinked at her. 

She looked entirely unbothered, maybe a little bit proud, as if it was just another one of her lessons. As if she did something like that for everyone, everyday. 

“Or that’s what it’s supposed to do,” Lilia rolled her eyes and swung her head to the side as she picked up her mug again, “but I’m certain I got it right.” 

Oh. Right. Of course. As if it was just another one of her lessons. Like a Christmas Day lesson. Like perhaps it was no big deal. Like maybe it wasn’t a true feat of magic, no matter how small the gem. Like protection wasn’t that hard. Like it wasn’t genuinely the kindest thing anyone had ever done for you. Ever. And like you wouldn’t think about it for the rest of your life, which you would, of course, cuz you’d hold the thing in your pocket, in your hand, you’d sew it into your skin, if it meant you wouldn’t lose it. 

Not that you could, you decided. No. You’d have it forever. You’d keep it until death, considering that’s what Lilia wanted. Your safety. Your protection. She went as far as to pick out a gem for you, went through the time of making it compact enough, smooth enough, and spent lord knows how long carving the symbol into its surface. Then continued to cast on it, doubling the chance of success, tripling the strength. For your protection. For your survival. Because she cared. Lilia Calderu cared. And you knew she did, so you weren’t sure why tears started to prick at your eyes, but it wasn’t like she noticed anyway.

She was too focused on her hemlock, admiring it still with a pleasant smile on her lips, and you watched her lick the hot chocolate from her mouth and put her mug down before you sprang into action. 

You hadn’t even realised that’s what you’d been waiting for, why you hesitated, but the second her hands were empty and you felt the warmth of her body press into your own, it made sense. That’s what you craved. That’s what you always missed. The subtle buzz in your body, calling as if it were without something, begging for a concept you knew nothing off, went quiet. Like a switch being turned off. Your hands tucked themselves beneath her arms and went winding up to her back, splaying out with the stone squished gently in between your left hand and her pyjamas. Of course that’s what you wanted. Lilia. Always Lilia. She still smelled so lovely, like the sweet perfume of your home and the lemon of her shampoo, and you shuddered as you felt a soft puff of breath along your neck. Jesus, you melted for her. Like ice in the sun. Like butter in a pan. Warm with love, with sunlight, and you felt as though you could soak her up forever. You could stay there, nearly collapsing at the feel of her arms running up to curl along the curve of your back, forever.

“Thank you Lilia,” you whispered into her ear, sounding shuddery and frail as those sweet hands patted you once, twice, so warm and so calming. Her arms squeezed gently, nonverbally returning the sentiment, and you felt weak. “Thank you…” 

A minute passed, then she shifted and pulled you a bit closer. 

“Merry Christmas, honey,” Lilia murmured, red lips so close to your skin you swore you could feel the brush of them. The pull of them. Like maybe she wanted them to be there. 

What a silly thought. 

“Merry Christmas, Madame Calderu,” you replied, just as softly, and grinned with joy as her shoulders began to jump with happy quiet laughter.

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The witch came back the very next day oh the witch came back...

Hi! Hello! Hi! Let me know what you all think? Did I get the characterization right? I have another part in mind for this, so if you like it and you show your love, you may have more Lilia Calderu coming your way. I really hope you're all doing well. - Yours, Ripley x

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[mandy-asimp]

Cards and Clay

Lilia Calderu x Potter! Reader

Summary: you move into town and start a new pottery place, you bring in much business and are pleased with your tiny living. Or so you think that's what's happening.

Warnings: language, smut (leaving this simple so you get the surprise), teasing, pet names, lemme know if I missed anything?

A/n ~ bye chat this is lengthy. I mean it. I was being honest when I said I love plot procrastination to the smut. But shiii I got it done🙂‍↕️

You just finished your first full week of your own pottery shop. It was honestly becoming a dream come true. You rented one of the newer apartments about ten minutes down the road, which was when you could tell the whole area was in need of renovations. Yet, with enough media promotion and the help of your friends, you managed to put a name on the map.

The weekend was ahead, and it would be busy for the Saturday lessons you offered. They would begin around eleven, giving you plenty of time to sleep in and even set up.

You were basically done cleaning up, the last thing was to rotate everything in the kiln. Which would've been completed, until the bell at the front door rang. "Oh! Sorry, we're closed!" You had called from the back, wiping the pottery off your hands onto the apron. By the door stood a curious-looking lady. Her hair pinned up and the curls fell down freely, some framing her face. Her eyes. Those were the next thing you had taken in. They were big, brown, and full of adventures you were for sure of it. They dropped against your body and you found yourself standing straighter and at attention.

"Can I help you?" You gave her your sweetest customer service voice possible. Hands coming to clasp in front of you and your head tilted. A few stray hairs falling with.

"I wanted to come see what was dragging in the business. Just not during it being an open business." She flashed you a softer smile, one that you could let your guard down to just a bit.

So you did, your shoulders had visibly relaxed and your chest didn't feel as tight. "Oh! Well it's just me and a dream here." You chuckled, a hand at the back of your neck. "I live in the apartment right down the street as well so I'm practically always here."

"I'm in the tarot shop across the street, so I know what you mean. This is cute, a nice addition I'd say." She hummed out, eyes roaming the space once more with a finger wagging in the air. You lightly laughed and held out your hand, giving her your name with a welcoming smile. "Lilia Calderu, how did someone like you get here anyways?"

"Like I said, me and a dream here. I went to college for a business degree, learned how to run a company, minored with an art degree. Work in between all that. All because I had a dream and gave my trust to the universe and here I am. My dream come true." You rambled a bit about yourself, knowing you could go deeper into all of it. But it was the simple version of your life.

Lilia enjoyed the way you spoke so passionately about something. She had forgotten how pure some people could still be within this grueling world. "It's nice to know some people still dream."

"Saying you don't dream?" You raised a challenging brow and crossed your arms. "You don't have something that keeps you going everyday even though the world sucks?"

"You sound so generic," she scoffed with a sly smirk. "I'm long past the dreaming age anyways. I've gotten content with my solo life. But you keep dreaming. I should get going though, it was nice meeting you."

You nodded slightly and watched her go. Standing like a mannequin until she opened her shops door. Once she was inside, you sighed happily and got back to work.

As for Lilia, her night concluded with her fiddling with cards as you seemed to run around in her mind. She felt silly if she used the cards in such a childish manner. Even when she groaned and placed the deck back down to the table. What was it about you?

~

A few weeks had rolled by and you had began a steady pace with work. Along with building deeper relationships with your students. A particular group you enjoyed was with Agatha, Alice, and Billy. They always knew something about someone.

You once asked them about Lilia, silently curious about the woman across the way. "She's been here ever since I could remember." Agatha started the talk. "She lives alone over there. In the back of her shop."

"She's gay. I can tell you that as well. There's no way she isn't." Billy pitched in. The fact earned him a silence and stares. "I went over there once for a reading. She's one weird, but sweet lady really."

You eyed Alice, she sat silently while working with her clay. "You got anything to add Alice? Anything I should be aware of?" You brushed your hair off your nose, getting a little bit of clay on your cheek.

"She's a quiet lady. I've never had trouble with her." Her eyes were focused to the spinning wheel, like she physically couldn't meet your gaze.

"Alice slept with her." Agatha snorted. Inflicting a heavy blush to the other as her head shot up and she began to deny the accusation.

You and Billy were left to witness the debate while trying not to holler with laughter. "It's ok anyways! Everyone's got their own thing. Whether you did or didn't, she seems nice. Except her shop is always dead. She gets maybe one or two customers if she's lucky?"

"Watching your new crush?" Agatha finally turned to tease you. Wiggling her brows and making kissy faces at you.

Your head shook and a smile was there, "hardly could say I have a crush. She an old lady who lives by herself, so what if my mind can't help to wonder if she's lonely. Anyone would. I just hope nothing bad happens." You finalized, pouring the rest of your focus into the yarn bowl you were attempting.

It wasn't until closing again that Lilia became your minds only focus. You were already set on grabbing take-out before heading home, and suddenly found yourself at her shops door knocking against the glass.

Your heart was hammering in your chest as you waited. Maybe she was asleep, or busy...or maybe even out..wherever she was you thought up a million conclusions until the door opened. Lilia stared up to you with furrowed brows.

Your name fell from her lips in a whisper, "What are you doing here?" She searched briefly over your person to find an answer. Her posture had seemed like she had been caught of something.

"I couldn't help but wonder, if you'd care to join me for dinner? It's usually what I grab on my way home on Fridays and I figured since you hadn't left yours for a while maybe it'd be nice for a change?" You were wincing at your own words. It was a brave invite alone, and you didn't anticipate how effective her being this close to you would be.

Lilia stood in much looser clothing. Patchy pants that were a variety of dulled colors, it fit with the silky cover up that draped her shoulders. Her shirt was the darkest piece, the neck line dropping enough to expose her chest. And her hair was up in a messy ponytail again.

"How sweet of you, but I've already had my dinner. Maybe next time though doll, I'm sure you're amazing company." She bid you a goodbye and the door was closed again.

But for the next three weeks, she continued to decline your offer. Simply, the fourth week you left her with little choice. You knocked against her door and patiently waited like normal. Only this time when the door opened, you didn't wait for pleasantries.

"This is the fourth week. I would invite you, but I know you'll say no. And I know you haven't actually eaten because your house doesn't smell like cooking, not even thirty minutes before. One dinner and if I'm really that bad, I will never bother you again." You held the door from closing with your foot against the frame. "We can have it here and everything."

Lilia eyed you for a moment. You really were persistent with getting to know her. So..she sighed and opened the door further. Slightly grinning as you squealed before rushing in. The smell of good take-out wafting into the air.

Your body buzzed with excitement as you began to set everything on the table as she grabbed plates and glasses for each of you. Even as you finally sat across from her, you couldn't help the beaming smile that touched your eyes.

"You really wanted to have dinner with me?" She chuckled, being the first to start plating food. You eyed her wised hands before following suit.

Your head nodded, "a woman like you is alluring. I bet you have stories to be told and nobody knows them. I wanna know all of them." You missed her hesitation as she really eyed you now. Too busy putting noodles onto your plate.

"Well I do have a few. But what are they to you? Don't you know other people who can give you better stories?" She raised, knowing you had built connections with many people through your art. How deep you could take someone with a piece of clay and a conversation.

Your head bobbed in agreement, "I mean yeah I guess, but at the same time I've failed at many connections. Pottery is selective just like tarot is. I've heard the art stories and so on, but I haven't heard yours yet. So, what crazy adventures has Lilia Calderu been on?"

That night she had told you a variety of stories. The funny ones, the ones that put you on the edge of your seat and make you wonder how she managed, ones that were sad, all of them. As many as she could because finally, someone wanted to pay attention to her and hear everything she's accomplished.

The lingering fear of being forgotten soon seemed to cower into a corner with you around. She liked it. She liked this feeling of freeness. She liked not being alone suddenly. Even as her big doey eyes watched your cheeks burn pink from laughing so hard, she couldn't get enough of it.

"My my, Lilia!" You huffed down your giggles. "I knew I wanted to know your stories for a reason! You are a woman of many lives." You leaned against your hand as you stared at her. "I wish I could've lived that all with you, sounds so much better than an average k-12 childhood."

"You're telling me, the one with the pottery shop, was average? You made your dreams come true, didn't you?" It was her turn to shine the spotlight.

"Nothing special about me. Ran around as a kid. Hid in the closet once I figured out what it was. Came out, got told it was just a phase. And then I kept quiet mostly till I got to college. Explored, studied, graduated, job, dream job. That's basically it." You sighed, taking a sip of water.

"Mm, I never labeled myself. That's the thing with the younger generations, so desperate for a label." She rolled her eyes, then suddenly they were on you with a small challenge behind them.

"Sometimes a label makes them feel validated. Gives worth to something. Haven't you ever wanted a title?" You quirked a brow to her, her move.

"It's sad you need a title to have worth," she shot.

"Says Madame Calderu?" You dodged and returned fire, only not missing.

Lilia sighed and put her hands up in surrender. Chuckling out a "you got me" before crossing her arms again. "This was nice, thank you."

"Well it only took four weeks of perusing, but I think it was well worth it....why exactly did it take four week?" Your tone curved the outcome of the night unbeknownst to you.

"I had eaten those three other weeks. You caught me when I was behind on schedule." She attempted to turn down the topic nicely. She really had no excuse except she thought you were taking pity on her. Now she could see that that wasn't true.

"Ok and I own the Mona Lisa." You mocked, earning a kick under the table. It made your eyebrows furrow quickly. "What? Can I not call out bullshit when I hear it? If you're gonna lie at least lie to me better." Another kick. "Alright! Geez lady, gonna leave me all bruised."

"Good, maybe it'll teach you some manners." She cocked her head briefly. You laughed, throwing your head back with a wide smile.

Continuing as you started cleaning up the table. "I'll have you know my mother raised a well mannered woman! I graduated the nicest in class, so I speak for myself."

Lilia stood and grabbed at the plates, her hip bumping yours. "Whatever you tell yourself to sleep at night."

You shook your head while putting the empty containers into the plastic bag. "I tell myself a lot of positive things before bed. Tonight it'll be complimenting myself for finally getting dinner with you." You turned to her with a cocky gleam.

The woman just squinted her eyes and sighed out. "You're an interesting one, ya know that? That average Joe crap doesn't suit you at all."

This time you let out a snort, a hand covering your mouth and nose instantly. "You're making me blush, Lilia! But truly, if I can figure out what interesting thing you see, I'll cut the Joe out."

"Anything named Joe should be cut out. Especially the men named Joe." She rambled only slightly. You hummed in agreement anyways, trying to stay serious with her. "I knew a Joe once, he was nothing good. Just caused me problems on problems. Had to bail him out twice before deciding enough was enough."

You smirked, "does that mean I can call you next time I'm in trouble?"

"As if you would get in trouble. You're a good girl there's no doubt about it. Matter of fact, I know why you really came." She lead you towards the small lounge area. Sitting in the chair facing the window and melting into the cushions. Missing the subtle pink on your face.

You sat across in the other chair, your back to the shinning moon. Although you got to see how the moon reflected against her. Highlighting the silver in her curls. "And what did I really come here for?"

"You've learned of something and you want to help me. But I can reassure you I'm fine. I will keep moving and settle somewhere else." She eyed you curiously, watching as your mouth opened and closed. You were caught. "I appreciate the thought though. It's nice to know someone's not forgotten me."

Your brows furrowed and you frowned. "Lilia you do know living is impossible in this day and age. I'm 35 and just moved out my parent's basement. Where are you really going to go? Not saying I doubt you or anything," you already knew where you were taking this entire conversation.

"I've managed my life this much. I can manage a few more years." She shrugged it down to a mere distraction. Only for it to eat an annoyed groan from across the way.

"You so have no plan and you're accepting that! That is like the worse plan of hoping things work out I've ever heard!" You couldn't help the need to express your opinion suddenly. Even though she had never even asked or told you for sure she was getting evicted. "What happened if you don't find anything? You're just gonna be homeless?"

She knew her circumstances weren't the greatest, but what was she really to do? "I'm sure I'll find something, worst case is an old people home. Don't worry so much about me, baby."

You couldn't help it though. Ever since she introduced herself to you, you couldn't help but worry about her. "I can't help it. You're here just alone 24/7. I hardly see you leave to even get groceries."

"You pay too much attention to my life then," she chuckled. You could tell it was in attempt to change the topic to something, anything else.

"Lilia. I'm serious." Your features rested as your eyes held all your emotions.

She stared at you for a long second. Just staring. The dark chocolate swirls of her eyes werwarmer than ever before in the moonlight. "What would you like me to do then?" She wasn't giving you any sass, it was her genuinely asking you.

You leaned forward, resting your arms on your thighs and you thought. Trying to think of anything you could possibly do to help her. It looked more like you were studying her carpet than thinking....your study. It was a spare bedroom, surely big enough for her. It's not even in the works, still a board of inspiration on Pinterest. She could come live with you. You make enough to cover and with the extra money you still have left over.

Lilia watched as it clicked into place for you. Seeing the glimmer of hope find its way to your eyes highlight. "I have an extra room." You began, raising a finger as she was about to speak. Her eyes widen, "you honestly have no room to argue. No rent, nothing. But in request you help at the shop sometimes?"

She sat silent, just hard staring you."You drive a hard bargain, you know that? You must do this often if you're this good at it." Lilia caved with a huff. You made a strong point anyways. "But you forget, the clay is all your thing."

Your smile was back, "I'll teach you! I'm closed on Sunday's, so it'll be the perfect day to introduce you to the shop and all the things you'll need to know. I won't make you do anything too hard, I promise." your hand extended over the coffee table. "Do I have a deal?"

Her eyes dropped to your hand, she took it with hers. "Fine, you have yourself a deal."

But you didn't really expect the outcome of the deal after a few months of it. You learned of Lilia's habits at home quickly. Like how she's very neat, but also loves a little bit of clutter. For example the tv stand is lined with her crystals and other tarot decks. She kept a specific one on the coffee table however, perfectly stacked and only she touched it.

Although, you couldn't help yourself one night. She had already gone off to bed and you had to do the order before you forgot. Your hands were delicate with them, scared that one touch would make the paper incinerate right before you.

They were what you assumed average. That was until you pulled your flashlight out to really look at the art work and paint. Each card was hand painted and sealed, the gold 'L.C' in the corner of them told you exactly who did it as well. She hand made her deck and just left them lying about like they were everyday cards.

It gave you the perfect idea for a birthday gift for her, seeing as the day was already a few days away. The topic of gifts hadn't come up at all, even when you did try and bring it up, she gave you practically nothing. Yet now you analyzed her personal cards and had to make a matching holder for them.

Your nights at the shop had begun to drag till almost eleven as you hunched over the dried holder. Painting details that matched to the cards, wiping them off after concluding they weren't perfect, only to repaint them. It was like this for almost two weeks. It was two weeks you hardly saw your roommate or even asked her to come in.

The Friday leading to her birthday, was the first time you'd been home at a reasonable time. Not that ten was any better, but when you unlocked the door and got in, Lilia was waiting with a wine glass in her hand.

"Look who's finally home." She was sarcastic about it. Like she was upset that this was another late night with no text, call, or explanation. "Two weeks and this is the first time I'm seeing you."

"You miss me?" The joke rolled from your tired tongue. You trudged to your room, placing your bag down and ridding of your day clothes into a black long sleeve and red plaid boxers. "I'm sorry, the shop has been really busy with the schools on break. Everyone's doing homemade gifts in class and then there's just the everyday pieces. I plan to have everything fired and ready for pick up tomorrow, then I'm closed for like three days."

"So you've been busy, I could've come to help. It is the deal." She got up to pour you a glass, except you just grabbed hers and took a sip. Her brown eyes stalked you talking a sip.

Your face contorted and you waved her back down. Getting up to get your own juice and pouring it into a matching glass. "It wasn't anything I couldn't have handled. Plus a lot of it was kiln work, I didn't teach you anything about Kit."

"Kit? Who's Kit?" Her brows furrowed as she took another sip. You both sat on the couch, you turned to stare at her fully with both legs crossed, while she had one leg bent and leaned against her fist to face you.

"The kiln. He's honestly the only man I would ever allow into my life. Except it seems that people don't take kindly to a kiln being picked over them." You bit the inside of your cheek and shrugged. Really not hearing the issue even as Lilia laughed at you.

"You don't understand how a big oven being picked would offend someone? You do know what you look like and your personality right?" She raised that perfect brows. You loved when she looked at you like this, you knew it meant she was teasing you and meaning it with humor.

"I could look and act like anyone," you tilted the glass at her. "I don't know, maybe I like me and my ceramics. They can never really break my heart. It's easier to trust the Earths natural gifts than an unpredictable human with my heart."

"That's playing it safe, baby." She spoke so softly. Yet every word dug into your brain to the core. Lilia downed her glass and stood up, "I'm turning in for the night. Do you need any help at the shop with all the pickups?"

You knew you brought home hers, so she had no chance of seeing it early. "That'd be really nice, thank you. Have a goodnight, Lilia." You stayed on the couch as she headed for her door. Ignoring (attempting to) how sudden the couch felt without her.

~

The next morning you were up and making Lilia's favorite breakfast. Well...maybe not her favorite, she never outright said it. A lot of things you know of her are honestly from the context of her stories. It was working though, you always seemed to know your way with her.

"You're up early?" Her voice echoed into the kitchen space. She stood in her silk pajamas. They were yellow stripes but they suited her. "Cooking as well?"

"It's a thank you for helping me since it'll be busy today." You spun around, finding her leaning against the counter and staring at you. Yet, you couldn't figure out how she was staring. It was a look you've never seen before from her. "If you're too tired you don't have to."

"No, no...nothing like that. What are you making? Or attempting to make?" She brushed it off and was switching her stare to something more teasing and delightful.

Your nose scrunched up, "I'll have you know a wise woman once said she enjoyed my cooking in the morning. But if you must, it's French toast with cinnamon and strawberry frosting. Served cutely with a cup of coffee."

"Now you're spoiling me. Is it really gonna be that busy?" Lilia watched you plate the breakfast and serve her first. Giving her a show of garnishing. "You should hope you're wrong."

You smirked, knowing you weren't wrong. "And if I am, then this'll have been me spoiling you because I'm sorry I've been out late with no word." You hummed before turning to start your own breakfast. "It'll be nice anyways. Billy's been asking about you recently so he'll be excited to see you. So will Agatha, she doesn't verbally show her liking for people but it's in her actions and expressions sometimes. And her pottery, she really pours her emotions out. Alice also enjoys your company, she said you and Jen, that's her roommate though we all know they're together, would be good friends." You were rambling on about everyone suddenly. Telling her about everyone and how much they always ask about her. It carried you through the entire breakfast.

Lilia was left speechless. She didn't realize that many people knew about her and asked. Nor the fact you were the one they were always asking and you always had an answer. "Now you're just trying to flatter me."

"No! Really! When you come in they're gonna love seeing you! We should start getting ready though, I have a class starting earlier today and running later." You collected the plates and put them in the sink. Slipping away without another word to get into pottery clothes.

With the weather getting nicer you had settled for a light yellow long sleeve and a pair of art overalls. You had painted flowers from the splatters from projects. Slipping on your old boots and grabbing your bag. Leaving your hair in the messy clip you did this morning.

As you closed your door, Lilia's closed in time with you. Your head snapped around to her in a flowing skirt and a sweater filled with colors. Her curls were free, falling graciously down her back and you suddenly felt your heart stop. Your hand was at your chest, and you just played it to dusting your shoulder.

You hadn't said anything after seeing her then. Staying silent and scolding yourself to not gawk and drool over her. No matter how badly you could imagine your hands tangled in her peppered mane, along with the many reasons why. Your cheeks must've flushed cause Lilia was staring at you now worried.

You were in the middle of moving the paints and everything to the circle table in the sunlight. But you had stopped and were just staring out the window. Blushing from your own lucid thoughts.

"Your cheeks are warm and pink," her voice cut through. Her soft hands were on your cheeks before you had noticed, holding them for only a moment. Lilia glowed in the sun light. Just like she did in the moonlight. She was earthal. Universally beautiful. Day and night, never did she falter. A timeless beauty.

"I'm..I'm good. I just..don't worry." You managed out finally. It felt like the air was being vacuumed out your lungs. Your chest was beginning to feel tight. Is this what dying is? An angel to hold you while it all just goes warm and tingly? Or is this what love felt like? Were they the same thing?

Saved when Billy was soon the first to show up. You must be behind already. You're too distracted today. Asking yourself by what was a foolish move, you just couldn't grasp the reality of the cause.

"Oh Lilia! It's good to see you again! We've missed you around here." He greeted the lady with a hug before coming to settle at the table. "You should join our class for today, we're making a tea set this time. And since you guys live together you could divvy up the work."

"Oh no, I wouldn't want to impose. I'm just here to help hand out the finished pieces." She waved a dismissive hand, much to your dismay. Even when she caught the sad glint take root in your eye, she stood by the front desk.

"I'm sure with a good towel and teamwork, you both could manage. Join us just for the day." The teen was persistent as he tied the apron around his body. "Come learn the juicy gossip this one spills in the circles."

"I do not spill any gossip! If anything it's Agatha who tells the most," you defended your name. A finger raised in the air, "and besides, I don't live a life to have anything!"

"Oh that's such a lie," Agatha had waltzed in. Her hair already pinned back and instantly found her seat at the table. "Just last week you had a fresher scoop on Dotti and her husband before I did. And I'm their neighbor!"

Lilia looked shocked to hear this, her eyes wide as they stared at you. "And what do you know about Dotti and her husband?" She challenged you.

And suddenly it was like a switch had been flipped. "Ok so, there's an update to them as well, from like yesterday morning. So to fill you in," you slowly sat down at your wheel.

Alice came in last finally, "we're already gossiping? I knew I was running late but not this late." She filled the empty wheel to your right. Making haste to get situated and get right in.

"We just started. We're starting with Dotti." You wiggled your brows.

"Oh! Did you hear about yesterday morning?!" You nodded your head. "Oh I heard the actual end of it, it sounded good so I'm ready." Alice sat, hands at the ready.

Your hands grabbed at the clay from the center, everyone following. "So I heard that he had forgotten their anniversary....again." You got lost in telling the details, some so itty bitty they questioned if you were actually there.

Lilia, from the front, listened and paid every ounce of attention to you when not helping a customer. She noted how relaxed you were in this setting. Eyes trained to the clay that span under your fingers, shoulders dropped, smile blooming as everyone talked. Overall, you seemed so at peace. She enjoyed watching you in this state.

"Yeah, Rio said she'd join one day." Agatha had spoken when Lilia tuned back in to the full conversation and not staring at you.

"We could do a little couples pottery! Alice and Jen, Agatha and Rio, Me and Teddy!" Then he turned to you and you could only throw your head back in laughter. "It's not funny! You've lived here long enough and still haven't tried dating!"

"Oh but that's not what I've heard." Agatha was the one to eye you now. Your face reddened when you felt her gaze burn into your hair. "Rumor is you're getting home late for two weeks?"

You shook your head, "officer no! It's not what you think!" You cried humorously before agreeing though. "Yeah, I have been. I've been busy here at the shop. Someone's gotta fire everything."

"Got any witnesses to back you up? Cause it gets juicier." Agatha continued, her eyebrow sharp.

You gasped, geneuinly confused on what's being said about you. "Oh my- what have people been saying?! Do people think I'm a...whore?" You whispered the title. Devastation written all over your face.

Lilia was dying to know where this was leading. This was her answer of if you really were here all those hours or you found someone young and they just kept you out all night. Being young.

"Oh they're thinking more than that. Recently Norm has been getting home around those hours as well....I'm sure the dots connect for you just like it does for everyone else." She eyed you, everyone was. "For him it's great, they think he finally found someone. For you though, they're saying it's settling."

You were cackling at that now. "Oh my God, no! I would never settle for Norm! Never! Who even started this rumor?" You couldn't help but to see the ridiculousness of the entire situation.

Your eyes quickly, praying she wasn't already looking at you, jumped to Lilia. She was staring right at you. If you didn't tear your eyes away, you'd have spaced out but when you felt the blush sprinting up your neck you had to. It made its way to your cheeks anyways.

"I think it was Herb. He's always been close with Norm. Maybe he saw you go home late one time." She reasoned, her hands up as she finished her teapot, examining her own work. "It reminds me of Rio."

Alice chuckled, finishing her own pot as well. "Herb and Norm starting the rumor you slept with him honestly makes sense. Recently his mom and sister have been pestering him about bringing a girl around." She added.

"I don't think I've ever even talked to either of them outside this shop. This is why being the young, single, shop owner is a trap in itself. If I wasn't a young, single, shop owner they would've never even bothered. So next time you hear someone put dirt on my name, I'm going to need you to clean it for me." You pointed a finger to everyone. Making sure they really understood you were serious.

Billy huffed, "so does that mean no couples class?" He put his best puppy eyes forward. And to your surprise, Agatha and Alice had joined him in their own way.

You soaked in their pleading expressions, letting your eyes slowly wonder to the woman at the front. "Fine...Lilia will just have to be my partner for it. And she'll act like it's the worst thing she's ever done, but we all know I'm the best in town."

"Please," Lilia scoffed. "Just the other week you didn't understand why picking a kiln over a human was offensive." She handed out the last pick up for the day. Surprised that it was all gone before two. She had finally came over to see what was actually happening.

"First of all, he has a name. His name is Kit. Use it and respect it. Second, maybe people should be more understanding." You shrugged. "Alright, I say we each make at least four tea cups. They're the same as the bowls basically, but...cup shaped."

Billy waved in the air first. "No, hold on. We are not skipping that. I've first hand seen Rio try to flirt with Agatha when she's pissed off, but that takes the title for most embarrassing."

Your jaw dropped with a gasp. "Excuse me! It's not embarrassing at all!"

"It so is! You're literally hot and you're picking kilns over people? That's like the biggest case of looks being deceiving." He kept going. His hands moving around in dramatics. "Like you pull in with the great appearance, and then you pick...the oven. I bet it's something deeper. There's another reason you pick the kiln."

Agatha perked up, eyes instantly glowing. She was ready to poke at you. "Oh I bet there is. You make the kiln out of the bodies of your dates and that's why we never know who they are?"

"Agatha...what the fuck?" You used the ball of your hand to rub between your furrowed brows. "There is no deeper meaning on why I like my kiln over most people."

"Over most...there's someone you're after isn't there?" Her brown eyes bored into you, not letting you look to anyone for help. She held you hostage for an answer. "Oh there is. Who is it? Is it actually Norm?"

"No!" Your voice worked quicker than your brain. "No there is no one, and even if there was it wouldn't be Norm. Like I said, I would never settle with a man. I'm dedicated to women, have been since I was sixteen. Billy is the only one here who likes men anyways."

"You never let us poke fun at you." Billy sighed. His eyes bouncing up to Lilia. "Do you get to make jokes at home?"

In that moment, you turned up to see. A part of you wondering what she would really answer. Because in reality, you do let her make fun of you. Every day, any day if she wanted. If it earned you a smile or a laugh, you didn't care. You just wanted to see and hear her happiness.

"Every now and then I get a good one in. For two weeks I haven't made one though, someone's too busy sneaking around with Norm." Lilia made her point, her cunning smirk stared back at you.

You managed out a chuckle and shook your head, "I'm not sneaking around! Can I not just be a shop owner who was tending to her customers work?"

Alice was the one to answer, "that's too easy. You need a little spice on your name."

"No! No I don't! I like my life plain, it's never disrupted and is just there." You tried to defend, suddenly it seemed with Lilia next to you everyone was going to get a dig in.

"Yeah, except a plain life wouldn't involve late nights with no alibi." Billy pointed.

"So you really do have to be hiding something from us if you're trying to play it down." Agatha nodded along.

"I was here. I know it's the truth so believe it or not. I was here for two consecutive weeks firing and making things for people to just come paint. Because I'm starting that soon, instead of being just clay." You were insistent now, really just wanting to clear the two weeks.

There was a collection of hums, trying to decide if it was a good enough excuse or not. "And where are these pieces then?" Lilia nudged you. She hadn't seen any extra pieces in the back.

You were silent. Caught in your own lie. Usually, the three wouldn't have known what's in the back. You would've told them there, that you have a shelf near the kiln to put them all on. But Lilia had been back there. She's seen what's there and what was not there.

"Oh..seems like you've been put in the hot seat. How do you plead now?" Agatha's eyes raised to find you with rosy cheeks and trained to your own hands.

"Not guilty." You mumbled. "I'm dropping the topic." The three groaned but let it go anyways. Leaving the rest of the class to random talks about what's been happening in their lives, minus you as they seemed to already know.

And the topic never came back up till it was just you and Lilia in the shop. With the sign on the door reading close and each cleaning in different areas. You in the back putting in the pieces from today and then going to wipe down and wash the tools used.

"So...if you've been sneaking around," she raised. Holding back her laugh as you groaned. "Well you were the one who was caught in a lie."

"Yeah cause I didn't think you'd air me out like that! I really have been here. You know I don't like men, I've stressed that, so it's not even realistic. I've been here just working honestly." You sounded more defeated, maybe it was cause you were tired as the sun slowly started setting. "Why does it bother you so much, even if it was me sneaking around?"

Lilia was suddenly next to you, her lips pressed together. She was biting back her true answer and now you knew how it felt to not know the truth. "If you're sneaking around, it means it's not for the public and you just deserve better than that, that's all. I want you to be happy and well taken care of."

"I am happy. I am also well taken care of. I have no purpose to sneak around with anyone. If I was, you would've known of them by now. But there is nobody. I don't need anyone else," your sentence fell off and remained incomplete. there was a moment where you both just stared in silence. Like you both knew that there was something being unsaid. "We should finish up and get home. I haven't had a night at home in ages." Her curls bounced in agreement. Leaving your side and going back to the front, wiping down a few more tables.

~

When you got home, you could only sigh. The day had finally caught up to you and you wanted nothing but out of your clothes. Lilia seemed the same way as she had instantly disappeared into her room. At first that's what you really did believe, expecting her to come back out within five minutes to have a drink with you.

You chose something simple, a pair of grey sweatpants that hung low and the same long black sleeve from the other night. Finally letting your hair down and washing your skin from all the clay that still was on you. Feeling incredibly refreshed for the night.

You left your room, sliding in socks to the kitchen. Pouring two glasses, one red and the other juice. You couldn't help but giggle at how childish you seemed drinking fruit punch out a wine glass, mocking the wine glass that was clearly darker. Lilia had joined you only a few seconds later, wearing your shirt and pajama pants.

You pulled your legs together and stared at her. "So..your birthday is tomorrow. Got any plans? Anything you want?" You started, taking the first sip as well.

"Little late to be asking about a gift, don't ya' think?" She leaned back to fully look at you, head propped against her fist. You've realized how natural this is, how easily you both fall into this exact spot night after night.

"That's you assuming I didn't already get you something." You hummed, wiggling your brows a bit. "Anything you want to do?"

"I haven't celebrated a birthday in ages, I don't think I'll start now. But thank you for the thought." She went to shut down the topic, but your facial expression was unsatisfied. "I'm sorry, its just another day for me."

"Boo!" You gave her two thumbs down in her face. Pulling them away before she could swat them down, the sound of your laugh gracing the air. "Well, luckily for you Lilia Calderu, I have a special day planned for you that is the perfect mix of relaxing and spoiling." You beamed, proud of how well you managed to keep everything quiet till now.

The older woman only shook her head. "Baby, we really don't have to celebrate it. Really." Your stomach did flips at the pet name, the blush on your cheeks reddening just slightly. It seemed once you realized your hearts desires, you couldn't conceal anything anymore.. "Anyways, you've done enough for me this year than needed."

"That's because I wanted to do those things. You think I stood outside your shop in the cold because I needed to? I did it cause I wanted to know you. And now that I know you, I want to do something meaningful for you. Also it's a day to celebrate my favorite roommate, so yeah..we're celebrating tomorrow." Your eyes were everything of warm and giving. Lilia enjoyed this stare, how you treated her so well.

She caved, "Alright, what do you have planned? Pottery at the shop?"

You audibly gasped, "Lilia do you think that's all I know?!" You were so happy here. "I planned a late morning so you can sleep in, so I can sleep in, and then I'll make your favorite brunch. After we're going to that one show you had mentioned wanting to see, but eating dinner before because it's not till 8. Everything would be closed by the time we got out. To finish, we'll do presents before bed."

"That is quite the day planned. Is there a limit to how late we're sleeping in? And what say do I get in any of this?" She wasn't objecting to anything, so you figured you had done well. Now everything just had to go as well.

Your head shook left to right, "no ma'am. Sleep as late as you want. It's brunch for a reason. And as for what say you get, you can have all the say, I just made the plan." Your hands were in the air surrendering all power to her.

~

While you had woken up first and began cooking, you wore boxers and the same black long sleeve. Shaking your hips at the song in your head. Something about today told you that it was bound to be so much better than what you had prepared.

Today you woke up and told yourself you would hint at your feelings. Leaving it open for her to catch on in her own time, but you couldn't bring yourself to out right tell her. Not when you had no idea if she could ever reciprocate those feelings. Yet, you danced while making the perfect breakfast for you and her to share.

Your mind couldn't help to focus on her though, subconsciously flipping the pancakes at this point.

Lilia was many things, you had realized this quickly, but your favorite word to tease her with was kooky. Sometimes even wispy. She always was mumbling different tarot cards to herself. You had played it down to a pull she did earlier or something that had a significance with the card. You also used those terms when she would be scolding you for some tiny mess you had left from either cooking or doing pottery out on the balcony. Those were your favorite times as well.

If it was just right outside and you had enough free time, you would work on new techniques and designs. Lilia would bring herself, a cup of tea leaves, and a blanket that would be wrapped over her legs. She would watch you work first, maybe for the most of ten minutes, before she emerged herself into the tea leaves. You never understood it either, you weren't in her world unfortunately. You knew nothing about tarot or tea leaves. She never let you in either, not like how you did her into your world of clay.

As much as it pained you to not see through her lens, you had managed to accept it and witness from the neighboring universe. You mostly enjoyed being her witness when she couldn't sleep and asked you to come sit in the living room with her. Even if it had been the most grueling day at work, you did. You pried yourself from the warmth of your bed and to the living room.

You were unaware of the many times you did fall asleep though. Lilia felt bad most those nights, yet she needed your presence to ground her from it all. All the crazed times she travels through. But it wasn't till the first time you had came out and laid your head in her lap, so exhausted you didn't even fight it and just slept on her lap that night. Her hands pulled the lovers card as well that night.

"You're making pancakes?" Her voice cleared your thoughts instantly. Especially when you whipped around to see her. Lilia had her curls free from all maintenance, sleep evident in her eyes as she yawned. She still was in your shirt.

"Do you not want pancakes, birthday girl?" You wore a teasing smirk already. Excited to celebrate her even more as she was awake. "I made chocolate chip ones, assuming that you liked them a lot the way you wolfed down three the first time I made them for you."

"Alright no need to be so cocky, baby. It's my day remember? Plus, you surrendered all control so I'd be nice if I were you." She fed your teasing right back to you. Finding a seat at the kitchen table, knowing you were already done in time for when she woke up. Her eyes followed you as you danced around the kitchen to gather everything and set the table. "Thank you," she hummed when you placed a perfect plate in front of her. "You really have stepped up your presentation skills."

"Only the best for you Madame Calderu." You glowed with her attention on you. Taking your own seat, you raised your glass of orange juice. "Happy birthday, Lilia." Lilia smirked at your antics but raised her glass anyways. Clinking the rim of her glass to yours.

It fell quiet for the first bites, the only sound that could be heard was Lilia moaning in approval at the taste of each pancake. A childish glimmer was in her eyes. "You know how to make a girl feel special." She praised you as she continued to eat. You only giggled and let the silence return as you also ate without much to say.

Even while you cleaned up, it was silent as Lilia stayed at the table and watched your every move. You were overly aware of that fact as well. "Can I ask you a question about your pajama choice?" It wasn't what you were expecting, but you nodded anyways. "It's a mix of very feminine pieces, like silks and pinks, while other times it's this almost masculine? What's that all about?"

"Most of my clothes are the ones from my exploring as a twenty year old who didn't know what type of gay was the right one yet. So I went between being hyperfeminine and masculine to see who was right for me. Eventually I gave up because it seemed it was never me, but more so who I was with. I didn't like that idea of changing my appearance for others though. I kept a mix of it all because in the end I'm gonna be gay, so what do my clothes matter?" You had rambled a bit, being honest about the evolution of your wardrobe. "Does it bother you?"

"No...no, I was just intrigue. I do your laundry and sometimes it really does look like you have a man here whose clothes I'm always washing. I can see why people think you and Norm were happening." She smirked behind the rim of her mug.

Your head had whipped around, a mean glare being shot from your spot. "I'm not sneaking with Norm! I have eyes for someone else anyways! So ha!" You stuck your tongue out at her.

"Oh yeah? Who? Kit?" She scrunched her nose. Not giving you a chance to keep defending yourself by getting up to find a spot on the couch. Also, Lilia didn't want to hear about you having the hots for anyone that wasn't her. It awoke a green monster she hadn't seen in a long time. "Did you plan anything for the four hours between brunch and getting ready?"

You came over after finishing up, head shaking. "No, I figured id leave it open for you to decide what we do?" You sat closer than intended, the couching sinking under you and sliding you right next to Lilia. It would be rude to scoot away so you got yourself situated to be more comfortable. "Maybe catch up on the show you've missed the last few episodes of?"

"You'd really sit here and watch that with me?" She really was enjoying having you do whatever she wanted already. "You said last time, and I quote, this show doesn't even had good plot, the gayness is all portrayed wrong. No lesbian actually does that pose."

You glanced down to your hands then back to her. "For you Lilia Calderu, it seems I will do a lot of things. So if that is truly what you want to do, then I will sit here and suffer for your happiness." You sighed out defeat as she reached for the remote. "It really is not how any gay person would act, I want you to know that."

"Yeah? And how do they really act?" She turned to look at you, the first moment the brown was visible for you, your brain failed to comprehend. It was honestly a good example of a gay panic without intent. "Hmm, so I see." Her hand was on your cheek instantly following. Her eyes darkened just slightly as she searched your features.

"See..see what?" You so dumbly managed, completely in this woman's trance. Never wanting to leave it though, all her focus was you and she just saw you.

Although, she flashed you that smile and the conversation was dropped as the show began playing. Her attention no longer on you but on the screen. There it stayed for the next few hours, never breaking away. Well you wouldn't know as you caved into the body heat Lilia radiated and fell into a small nap on her shoulder.

Lilia however refused to wake you until four, lulling you into a deeper state of sleep by playing with the few strands that weren't clips back. But surely she had taken it out to really play in your hair, nails scratching over your scalp as you pushed deeper into her side. A hand throwing itself over her lap was the sign you were actually deep asleep. How long had you been up for you to be this tired naturally? The day had hardly started.

Yet, by five-thirty both of you stood by the doors to your bedrooms gawking at the other. You, in a baby pink mini dress, the back was a corset and a big bow right atop your butt. A simple white short cardigan covered your arms and white chunky heels dawned your feet. Tying everything together with an assortment of jewels and metals. Lilia, in plaid wide legged pants that flowed nicely, it was assortments of yellows and blues over a deep maroon. A plain white button up and a mustard yellow jacket that complimented with the pants. She must've been wearing some platform on her boots as she stood only slightly taller than her average days.

You smiled and your cheeks warmed when she returned it. "You look nice," you made the first step towards the door. Picking up your keys and opening the door for her. "M'lady," you bowed and gestured out.

"You look lovely as well, baby. I could almost tease you all night long while you look this cute." Huh? Had you heard her right? There was no time to question it once she was out the door, looping her arm with yours as you began to talk down. "So where is dinner?"

You slightly smiled, still caught on her previous statement. "It's a little place Billy and Alice both suggested. We told Agatha to not give her opinion after she suggested Starks. That woman and her...Rio are the finest dinners I've ever met. But it's still nice and up there, just more affordable."

"I'm sure it'll be just fine." She hummed. Her approval seemed to be something you were always constantly chasing, stressing yourself for it to the days end. You loved when she thought you did a good job. It at some point began to tickle a need and drive in you, even if you were unaware.

And the dinner was fine, actually it was almost perfect. You had known they served Sicilian specialties, which made Lilia ecstatic to try and compare them to her own cooking. Maybe you should start learning more dishes to cook.

You did let her pick your meal, seeing as you were oblivious to what half of the items tasted or even looked like. It was how you asked that stirred the shift. "Lilia...can you order for me?" You were so shy about asking her. It was such a childish thing to do, when you could've looked it all up, but she was there and knew how each one should taste.

Her hand came up to cup your cheek, her brown earthal gaze was full of mischief and mysteries. "Aww, the lil' chef out her comfort zone? Don't worry, I've got you baby." Lilia beamed anyways and glanced back to the menu. Leaving you to sit dumb and pretty.

The way her lips formed the pet name was enticing. Calling you closer when they pressed together, but pulling back when you did lean in. The deep red was perfect for her. It complimented her every shimmer of her eyes when she got lost in the topic with you.

Lilia called you 'baby' a lot more during the dinner after you had asked her as well. You squirmed in how you slowly felt yourself slipping further and further into her. The worst part about it was the fact she knew what she was doing. Her faux worries of, "baby are you ok?" Or if it was her hand grabbing yours and saying, "can I do anything to help?" Her fingers tracing into your palm, more specifically her middle and ring finger pushing them into the skin.

The server was your savior for the night, coming by frequently to give you time to collect yourself from Lilia. Trying your absolute best to pull your brain back to this planet. Especially when they brought out the little slice of cake with a candle.

The sight of it sobered you up thankfully. A goofy grin shinning from your glossed lips. "Happy Birthday Lilia," you were sparkling like the flame. This was the moment you waited for all night. To see the hidden child finally be celebrated. To see a woman to finally be celebrated for holding on. To see Lilia being celebrated for just being herself.

She felt the world disappear as she blew out the candle. Feeling the wave of appreciation you sent her way as the smoke swayed into the air. "You really are the sweetest, ya' know? Always taking care of me, from the very start. I knew there was something to you."

You weren't quite sure what that meant but you gave a nervous laugh. "I just know when I like someone I guess. I care about the people I like. You're one of those people. You always will be." Your emotions were mixed within your words and they invaded your eyes.

Lilia let her hand return to your cheek, "you make me feel special when you look at me like that."

It was the perfect opening, "it's cause you are. You've been special...and kooky." You teased her back finally. Her eyes narrowing just slightly at you, her hand falling and retreating. But you grabbed it and held it for a second, "I mean it. You are special Lilia. I've been trying to get you to realize that." A weight had crumbled from your shoulders. Even if it wasn't a direct confession, it made you feel open enough that she had a grasp of the idea.

She sighed and focused on how your fingers played with her rings. Your touch was soft and precise. She should've known that though, with how you work with clay and design such intricate shapes, of course you had skilled hands. "You might be the only one who thinks that much of me."

"Good, only I can think of you." It came flying out quicker than you noticed. Once Lilia let out a rumbling laugh, you caught up.

"What? You wanna be my only baby or something?" The confidence she radiated made you feel hot. You put yourself in this situation.

If you backed down, you'd never know. If she said no, that she didn't feel the same, you'd be ok with that. You might spend the night crying and alone but that'll be ok.

"What if I do?" You tried to match her, not even coming close when she shifted more forward. Her canine teeth barred themselves to you. The light making them look sharper than you've ever noticed.

Her tongue darted out, catching your attention to those lips again. Your breathing picked up and you felt on the edge like you've never been before. It was a long drop, you knew that, but if you just got one kiss you'd happily fall. Hell, you'd full sprint off the edge while laughing hysterically.

You pried away and back to her eyes. They were now dark rivers in the night. Lust swimming around and creating little waves of reflected moonlight. This was a look you never knew could be real. "You wanna be mama's good girl don't you?"

The names. The look. Her touch under yours. It was earth shattering. Like everything you had built and had made was only the second important thing to you. The first was her. The first had always been her. "Yes...yes please." Your eyes glossed over in seconds. Succumbing to her dominance and slipping bashful.

Lilia grew a grin that was a combination of everything from sweet and nurturing to hot and destructive. "Is that really what you want, baby?"

Your head nodded while your lips slightly parted. "Yes, more than anything. Please..." the server came back around once more with your card and the final receipt. Wishing you both a goodnight, and Lilia another birthday wish. You signed it smoothly and then huffed yourself back into the reality of what was just happening. "I really do want this."

Lilia hadn't taken you as one to have such a deep headspace, so when you were really meeting her gaze she knew it couldn't have been easy to come back from it. She was the first to stand, wrapping herself in the yellow coat. It was then she came and stood closer to you, having the higher advantage. "I do too, believe me." She leaned forward and kiss your forehead. "I do too, baby." Her kisses must've been powerful because your eyes were blown all over again. You had fallen deep back into it. She couldn't help to hold your soft cheek at it all, it was one of her new favorite moments. "Why don't we go see that show?"

You beamed and nodded. Pulling your own coat over your dress. You were instant to intertwine your fingers, letting her pull you on out but keeping you close behind. You already were a fan of holding her hand, never wanting to let go.

The only time you did was when you sat and her hand held your thigh. She left it there the entire show. It was a distraction just being still, it was derailment when her nails scratched up and down. You had tried to grab her hand and hold it still, yet she would only turn and give you this warning look before returning to the stage. You let go and traced shapes into her hand to focus from her ministrations.

It was the end of the show and not a single line had reached you. You just stood with everyone else while clapping along. The echoing applause sounded the same as the crackling of fire that was your skin. Lilia had you warming up with such light touches. But eventually, it all died down and the cool air of outside is sizzling your skin out.

"Did you like it?" Lilia had asked you, a little eager to know your thoughts on such a show. You only nodded, attempting to play it like you had been paying attention and not thinking of her and all the things she might do to you. Those wised eyes knew though, she knew you hadn't caught a single thing said the moment her hand touched your soft thigh. "Yeah? And what was your favorite part?"

"The acting." You so simply stated. Hoping it was good enough for her to not continue to press. But that would be too easy.

"Who's?" She raised her brow and all you could do was give her a blankness look while walking closer to the car. "You weren't paying attention were you?" The guilt filled your body and answered in itself. Lilia's curls danced around her as her head shook. "That truly is a shame, it's an amazing play."

Your frown was quick to appear, "'m sorry...it's just...you didn't make it easy..." you apologized. Stepping into her space and looping your arm with hers.

"Oh so it's my fault?" She lowly chuckled out her question. A cocky smile filling the silence as you stuttered out sounds but no words. "I'm just teasing you, baby. Don't get yourself so worked up over it."

"And because of your teasing I couldn't pay attention." You bit the inside of your cheek, leaning against her to throw off her balance. Succeeding in the efforts and snickering.

Lilia laughed with you, even as she regained herself. Her arm slipped from yours and her hand settled on your back. "Did I tease you the entire time to work you up? Maybe. And maybe pretty girl, I plan to finish what I started at home."

You rounded to stand in front of her, cheeks turning red but the night dimming it out. Her lips were curled with a smirk that implied everything you needed to know. Soon it was you holding her hand and dragging her to the car.

~

It started with her straddling your lap in the center of your bed. Her lips kissing all over yours and down your neck, finding every right spot to leave you gasping. The feeling felt overwhelming, to finally have her kissing you. It was feeling like everything was hypersensitive. Stinging with pleasure as she continued all over.

Your hand slipped into her curls, twisting your fingers with the pattern and holding her close. She knew how to work a body and it showed.

Lilia also knew how to stake her claim. Leaving bruises all down the spans of your neck. A silent thought to show the town you were no longer available rang in her head. And when your hand found her hair, she only could groan against you. You needed her just as she needed you. It made her blood rush with anticipation. She wanted to make you feel better than you've ever felt. Really secure her place in your mind. Making sure nobody could ever come in and kick her out.

Her lips were plush against your pulse. Even when they covered her teeth as they sunk into you, the moan slipped straight from your throat. Your free hand flew to steady yourself on her hip, feeling the heat radiating from her. How it seeped through her clothes and onto your exposed skin.

"Lilia..." You hummed before swallowing thickly. You didn't know what you were actually asking for, all you knew is you wanted more of her. In your sight, on your tongue, in your hands, echoing in your ears, and filling your every breath. The very feeling of her on you wasn't enough as you really caved into her. "Mama..."

Her hum vibrated against you, "Yes baby?" You whined at the pet name finally. Knowing that if there was anytime to let her know her effect it was here and now. And the way she called you 'baby' always tickled something deeply rooted in your brain.

You sighed out, the hand on her hip began fisting her top. Begging her closer, "more..."

"So needy...I bet you've been needing me for a while haven't you?" Her movements lightened to almost ghostly passes. It made your skin crawl with goosebumps. "You're the perfect gift for me baby." She spoke low and with rasp. "My perfect girl."

You gasped at the claim. "All yours..." you tightened your grip. Just the subtle touches of her, the amber and deep musk invading your lungs, the sounds of her lips on your skin, sucking, bruising you, everything. It was everything this woman was doing and also wasn't doing that drove you into override. Your mind felt hazy and your body felt hot and tingly. "Mm..please mama...I need more." You whined.

Lilia pulled off, cupping your cheek and seeing that long gone look in your eyes. Your pupils dilated to the very brim of color. "I hear you baby," she hummed. It was effortless to get you to lie down. All it took was a glance back at the pillows and you were crawling frantically to get comfortable. "You look so damn adorable in this dress. Just like a doll."

Your cheeks warmed further and you couldn't help the small grin. "Thank you, I bought it just for you," you bashfully confessed. And suddenly you were on your knees showing yourself off to her.

"Isn't that just sweet of you, dressing for me already. And you're so well mannered baby, you really did want to be my good girl." She smirked as your head bobbed in agreement with a proud smile. "You'll be good for me right? Even when mama buries her cock so deep in you?"

Her hands were holding you firmly in place and she was back in your space. On you without even an inch apart. Lilia was struggling to keep her control and work you up...but fuck you for being so precious. She couldn't help the need to destroy it. To make you her slutty baby.

Her shuddering breath made you lower back down from her. Sitting back on your heels and staring up at her. "Yeah...yes..yes I'll be good even then. Promise," you batted your lashes.

The lust in her eyes deepened to something darker. "Mama's gonna have so much fun with you baby."

You glowed with innocence as you eagerly settled your self back into the pillows again, this time Lilia trapped you down with her hands on either side of you. Her devilish smile seemed nothing of mischief to you, so you were giggling up to her. Relishing in what you thought would be slow and languished.

How naive you were.

Lilia's lips were latching to your chest completely disregarding your already bruised neck, making you gasp and cry. But she made a whole new mural of purple across your collar bones. Leaving your chest rising in deep breaths. "Nobody's gonna think you're single now baby. No more rumors with you and anyone else."

You tried to catch yourself to respond but before you knew it her lips were pressing over your covered stomach. "I'm gonna fuck you in and out of this dress so nicely, baby. The things you make me want to do."

"Mama..." you whined while your hips bucked into the air, bumping into her chest. It made you realized how clothed she is against you and your dress. Your hand grabbed her shoulder, fisting the shirt just once more and pulling carefully at it. "Your shirt...off please." You were polite even in your stare as she obliged.

Letting you drink in the sight as she undid each button one by one. Soon the white fabric was on the floor and she was in just her white bra. Her boobs spilling out just right. Your eyes twinkled with thoughts of kissing them and sucking on them. Making her moan and hum in delight.

Lilia must've seen the gears turning cause she returned to kissing her way down. "When I'm done with you, then you can have whatever you need from me. Got it?"

Your head agreed, "yes mama." Your eyes focused on her between your legs. You were desperate to burn it into your brain. More desperate for her to actually eat you out though.

Lilia was kissing all around your core. Your thighs were left with even more love bites than your chest. "I can't wait to taste how sweet my girl is." She pressed her lips to your clit, smiling to herself as you sharply inhaled and body stilled. Her fingers hooked into the waistband, pulling your white panties down and off your legs.

The cold air over your wetness made you shiver in anticipation. It was when her warm breath fanned over you did you cry out. "Please, I need you so bad mama. I can't take any longer." You pleaded.

It was the richest honey her ears had ever been given. Her tongue flattened against you and in one swipe she collected as much of you as she could. Humming in content at your taste that was all hers. This was her secret stash of honey that only she'd ever be allowed to use. And she couldn't get enough.

Her tongue ravage you in ways you didn't expect. Like she had done this so much it was practically second nature. The thought made you shift slightly, but Lilia seemed to know you in this state like the back of her cards. "I've never had anyone like you baby. I just can't get enough. You're so fucking sweet. So...god who did I please to get you? Hmm? My sweet, sweet fucking girl."

Your body loosened and began to heat up. The coil in your stomach tightening in the most delicious ways. "Ma..mama..don't stop please.."

She hummed against you again, picking up her pace and pushing harder against you. Slurping up as much of you as she could as you came with a cry of her name. Her actual name.

You had snapped back to feel the reality of it for just one moment. To grab her hand and squeeze it as she kept licking and sucking at you. And then as conscious as you were, you were back to whining for her.

Lilia delivered one last lick before placing kisses all over your hips and thighs. Trailing all the way up to your lips, were you both hummed at the taste of you. "We're gonna have issues now that I know you're just a piece of my favorite candy. I'll never be able to resist you, baby."

You, still trying to catch a steady breathing, giggled. "You're exaggerating, mama." Your hand cupped her cheek and you smiled widely once again.

Yet, Lilia only crashed her lips to yours once again. This time a little more rough as her tongue slipped in while you gasped. Establishing itself and dancing lead with yours. She was making sure you tasted what she just did. And when she pulled back, her eyes were sharper as they stared down at you. "The way I'm going to fuck you will make you realize just how humble you are. That you wont believe that's how people want to do you. But only mama will get you. Only mama."

It was much more commanding now. The air felt thicker and you felt your body melt into the mattress you were in flames.

Your heavy breathes were the only thing to be heard as Lilia stood and riffed of her pants. Swaying her hips as she disappeared out the room. You took the minute she was gone to just breathe and calm your racing heart beat.

All your efforts were instantly thrown out however. Lilia returned, and much to her word, she had a rather large strap around her waist. Although it looked rather real if you had any say. She pointed towards the ground in front of her. Flashing her sharp teeth as you obeyed and she was able to collect a fistful of your hair. "Go on. Suck mama before she ruins you."

You loved this switch. Yes her softness and delicacy were nice, but this side of her made your skin crawl with heat. She was dominating everything from your body to your mind. There was nothing besides Lilia.

Your plush lips wrapped around just the tip and Lilia's brows twitched for a split second. You had begun to bob up and down her, chalking it up to be the sight getting her off the most. It was when her hips began to roll with the movement of you, hitting deeper in your throat. Then her hand in your hair had begun to tighten and her hips started snapping faster. She was throat fucking you. Groaning and gasping at the desperate way you held her thighs to stabilize yourself as tears rolled past your temples. All while you kept your eyes on hers.

With one last deep thrust, warmth had shot down the back of your throat and Lilia gave a shaky moan. Her hand let up in your hair and you slipped her out your mouth. You swallowed once to get everything down. Cheeks bright red as you stared at the twitching appendage. White cum still oozed slowly out the tip and your eyes had jumped up.

But Lilia didn't explain anything, she just pointed to the bed. "On all fours baby." Was the only instruction.

Apart of you was in conflict. Something was whispering so quietly to pull out of the deep space you were in. It was so quiet it was gone with the sound of floor creaking under your knees as you stood. Finding your spot in the middle, exactly how Lilia wanted you. Listening to the room around you to find the woman.

Her wised hands ran over your hips, one up your spin and to your neck. Pushing you down into the mattress. Her fingers ghosted the curve of your body. "And look, there's even a bow in the back." She played with the fabric a little before flipping it over to bare your ass to her. She was memorized by your glistening folds. "You're impeccable, baby." She held your hips more firm and lined herself up. "Mama's gonna take such good care of you baby. Don't ever worry again."

You let out a strangled moan as she bottomed out, letting out her own grunt as well. Her chest was pressed against your back as she gave you both a second to adjust. And after five, she was slowly easing into her pace. Pulling all the way to the tip, just to slam all the way back in. "Look at you, already taking me so well." Her lips pressed against your spine.

"Th..thank you..'mmhh..mama," you managed. Your hands fisted at the sheets and your hips started to push back against her. Helping her to find a deeper, softer spot. Once she registered it was your sweet spot her hips moved quicker.

Snapping against you and pounding you into the mattress. "Fuck baby...I don't think I can ever let you leave now. Not when you're sucking me in like this." It was brutal how quick she was moving.her hand snuck around your body and two fingers circled around your clit.

"Fuck...fuck me mama. Just like that. Please, please, please just like that." You felt your breath hitch in your throat and your body tighten. It felt all so good, so warm, so right. You clenched around her as you let a moan echo into the room.

But Lilia kept going. Her pace never faltering as she just slammed into you. Her nails digging into your beautiful hips, pulling you back against each thrust. It felt like she had began to find deeper as your body was working up all over again.

"You're so captivating baby, ever since the day you first arrived. I couldn't help myself but want more of you. And denying you..god that was the worst part. I was denying myself. But now, now we're done denying." You heard her words but they felt like muffled harmonies just passing through.

Your body tensed again and you were crying out again. "Mama..." you tried to get away, leaning forward out her grasp.

Yet she had one last thrust in her. She let you slip just away enough, that when she slid right back through your tight warmth, she found the golden spot. Sending you into an intense aftershock and she filled you full and groaned against your shoulder. Her arm hooked around your waist and held you still with her.

Both of you panting and hardly having anything to say. "Let's get you out this dress." She whispered, kissing your sweating temple.

You felt her slip right out of you and lean back. The sound of the harness coming undone caught your ear, yet it never hit the floor. Using your remains strength you pushed up to look for it. But it wasn't anywhere to be found. And when you looked to Lilia, she was walking away from you into the bathroom.

Your mind only thought it over so long before Lilia was returning in a shirt and with a wet towel. She offered you a hand to stand which you took. It was subtle the next moment. Her hands untying the dress and freeing you from it. The pink fell to your feet and you were suddenly butt naked in front of Lilia. Blushing madly as you caught her eyes in the mirror.

She licked her lips. "Oh baby...we might have to do a round two."

~

"That wasn't part of the plan Lilia!" Agatha scolded the older witch. "I need my walking darkhold conscious and aware of reality. Not whimpering and begging mama!"

Lilia sat in the chair feeling ashamed. It wasn't meant to happen. They were supposed to come and pull you from the many witches and warlocks who've added to the Scarlet Witch's curse. Those who knew of your knowledge worked to conceal you into your fairytale life.

But when Agatha Harkness formed a coven to walk The Witches Road successfully, she needed more. She needed you. The walking Darkhold. Secluded and alone between an apartment and clay shop. They were nice enough to give you two locations unlike Agatha.

"Ok, well let's think. She's oblivious to us all having powers. So we're still clear of being detected as anything." Alice pointed out the pro.

"I've been doing pottery with magic for how long and she hasn't noticed." Agatha added. Her blue eyes trained to Lilia as she thought. "Did you use any magic at home?"

Her big brown eyes shifted to look away. "Last night I did..." she murmured but the coven easily knew what she said.

"Oh my god Lilia! You man," Billy nudged her while walking by to get a drink from the kitchen. "So what if you ease her to question it? You have the deepest, no pun intended, connection with her. Drop things of the darkhold to her."

"Are we sure giving Agatha Harkness back the thing is a good idea anyways?" Jen crossed her arms, being against this idea in the beginning.

"She's not a thing." Lilia and Agatha said at the same time. Eyeing each other in suspicion.

"Let's run with Maximoff's idea. What if you mention details I feed you? Ones I know she knows on the fly? I'll write them down and you'll leave them about the place." Agatha played off the boys thought.

"And what if it doesn't work?" Lilia raised the opposing. Apart of her didn't want to break you out. She wanted you all to herself. If you were out you'd be spending all your time with Agatha trying to recreate the Darkhold.

Alice crossed her arms and held herself a little tighter. "We have no choice but to try Lilia. What harm could it bring?"

"Unleashing the last source of spells that have been put into a hook called 'The Darkhold' for a reason." Jen scoffed. As much as she didn't like the idea, she was running with it to free someone 'bound'. She knew that feeling herself.

Agatha hurried around and scribbled down spells onto a variety of sticky notes. In total making seven and handing them to the divination witch. "I need her out the spell Calderu. Don't let whatever feelings you conjured for her little personality ruin this. Or so help me, I will walk in next time and drag her out."

It was an honest promise kore than a threat. Lilia knew that. "Fine. I'll put them around the house tonight before she comes home."

"Good girl," Agatha hummed before leading them out the apartment. After Jen had left, the brunette turned one more time. "Lilia. Get this done so we don't have to be vicious."

So she did. She placed the spells in the places she knows you go straight for when you get home. One in the key bowl by the door, one in the bathroom on the mirror, your pajama drawer, on your nightstand by your charger, the fridge on your fruit punch, in the cup cabinet, and lastly on the black tv screen. It was impossible to miss any of them.

But it didn't prepare her for what you had planned for coming home. You waltzed in basically shinning with joy as you pecked her cheek. She sat in the living room, anxiously waiting your arrival.

"Today was so busy! Busy but good!" You clearly missed the note in the key bowl. There were six other chances. "Pour me juice and I'll be right out," you gave her another peck and we're off into the room.

You first collected something to change into. Feeling a sweats and boxer outfit, you collected the black sweats from the closet and boxers from the top drawer. Grabbing a hoodie as well and throwing it all on to the bed.

Heading into the bathroom next. In need to wash away all the grime and clay that lingered. The note caught your attention first. Your brows furrowed and you mumbled over the words. Something about them felt staticy on your tongue. You even went as far to check yourself in the mirror.

In all, with the new unease you continued through your routine. You were changing clothes when the house just seemed too warm for a hoodie, so you swapped it for a tank. Another note with gibberish was lying on top. Had Lilia placed these about? What are they and why in your drawer?

You kept moving about, finding another next to your charger. You figured you could ask if you brought them to her. Including the one you caught on the tv. "Lilia? What are these notes?" You had four in your hands and none of them made sense.

"Baby...I need you to really concentrate. Do they seem familiar at all?" Her brown eyes were wide with pleads. None of this was making sense to you. "Have you tried saying them out loud?"

"They're in a language I don't even know. What is it even? Latin?" You wildly guessed. You took your spot right next to her and kept trying to read them. "I'm a bit confused. This feels like earlier when Rio stopped by...said something about reality and I just assumed she was making a bad joke."

"Yeah? And what did she say?" Lilia stood, briefly leaving your side to grab the other three. Bringing them back and setting all seven on the coffee table.

You shrugged while staring. "She was on about Agatha needing me in a different reality. Like we knew each other somewhere else. Then she said this one was cute and boring. I need an adventure." You intently focused on the fifth note. "You know Latin right? Said you took a class? Can't you read these?"

"I can, but it's not about me." She shook her head.

"Then what's this about?" You picked up the note and really traced the letters. "This one kinda seems familiar. Like I've seen these letters arranged once before." You kept repeating what you could.

Eventually your broken syllables turned into words. Then you were chanting them. Your body shook with a cold rush that ran all through your veins. You've known this feeling before. Your eyes fell to the other notes, realizing what they were. You knew these spells.

"Oh thank- fucking finally hun!" Agatha's voice barged into the room.

"Oh my- Harkness what the hell happened?" You shot up. Where were you and who were these people around you? Your eyes dropped to your hands, so did Agatha's.

Her chuckle of relief washed the room. "Oh you still have it all. Oh, the Scarlet Witch. She destroyed every copy of the Darkhold. But not you. You got buried deep. Weeks. Months of coven work to get you freed."

You scoffed. "Please, Agatha Harkness and a coven? That's the biggest joke I've heard in my life. Is that who these people all are? Your coven?" Your bite was so familiar for the purple witch, but new to everyone who'd met your false personality.

"I see why you two get along." Jen huffed, taking a seat over on a stool. "So how'd you meet her Darkhold?"

"Unintentionally. She was fucking around with the book, casted a spell and poof! The literal embodiment of all those spells and things you would let take over your morales." Your smile was sickening.

"Yeah, well I need you." Agatha cut the rest of the conversation. Snapping her fingers in your face to get your focus. "I need your knowledge. I need you to rewrite the book."

You sighed, "it's always need, need, need with you Agatha."

"I just freed you from how many curses? This is how you respond?" She was in disbelief.

You nodded, "uhh yeah! I was only in that curse cause of you! Dragged my ass to Westview and played house and now look! Whose house are we even in?!" Your hands were wildly gesturing.

"Yours! Well yours and Lilia's. Ya know? Mama?" Agatha's brow arched and her smile was nothing but teasing. "I know you remember more of those months than you're letting one."

Your eyes dropped to the oldest witch by your side. Well...technically you're the oldest living thing in the room. "You fucked me with a magical dick?" Your brows furrowed. Her cheeks blushed heavily at your forwardness. "I wanna put a pin in that for sure, but in the mean time. Even if we do recreate the Darkhold, it won't be the same. Especially since I have a horrible drawing hand so I could get you the correct formations for certain rituals."

"I don't need rituals! I need power," she groaned. Her hands on your shoulders and pushing you down to the couch. She crouched and held your hands. "You hold over thousands years of dark magic up in the pretty brain of yours hun. I need you to use it for me ok?"

Lilia tensed at the way Agatha was speaking to you. Like she had once been the one to dominate you. "That's because I am well into at least my five thousands."

The three in the kitchen finally took further interest in you. "Hold on," Billy pipped up. Rushing over to hover over you as well. "You're over five thousand years old?"

"I'm the embodiment of that dumb book, yeah. Unfortunately. And you kid, your mother was a pain in my ass. I mean seriously, even under everything, every curse, spell, binding, I could feel her using the book. She never slept, kept me lingering for ever." You pointed before dropping to Agatha again.

"What do you say, hun? Just like old times?" Her blue eyes were silently, and so hidden deeply, begging you.

Lilia was for sure you'd go. That those dark fingertips that used to be clear from all mischief would run off to cause destruction. Leaving her forgotten.

"No."

The room erupted in to confused 'huh's. Except for Jen who was laughing in Agatha's face at the backfiring of her plan.

"What the fuck do you mean no?" Her hands gestured in your lap for any explanation to this.

Your eyes found Lilia. "I want to stay here with her. You're right, I do remember those months. And I remember how real it felt with Lilia. Unfortunately do hope as the Darkhold, I'm still accepted." You were in just her world. "I can give you everything."

To engrossed in those deep swirls, you missed Agatha groaning as she got up. Already just accepting her defeat on having you fully, but she was going to get those spells.

Lilia's hand had come up to your cheek, a thumb stroking over it as her heart swelled. "You really mean it?"

"You'll have to relearn me is the only downside." You placed your dark fingertips on her hand. Finally drawing all the rooms attention to them. The blackness ran far up your arms and under your shirt.

"Wait, wait, wait. Before you go swearing yourself into marriage Bookie I need to know you'll at least give me spells when I need them? I just need something, anything from you." She had that signature annoyed look she always had with you.

"If you ever call me that again I'm not helping you. But for now you have yourself a deal. But don't think you're getting any of the good ones." You hummed, not really paying any mind to her anymore.

"We should go before they start making out..." Alice mumbled, watching you and Lilia get closer and closer slowly. It was comedic how they all scurried out.

The door closing as you, the knowledge of the Darkhold, laughed the wondrous Madame Calderu for the first time clearly.

"I never gave you your gift did it?" The question fell from your lips softly. You were quieter when with just two people. Her curls shook left and right. "Yeah..you did fuck me pretty good. Imma go get it, I know pottery me would've wanted you to actually have it."

You pressed a kiss to the back of her hands and went to get the bag in the corner of your room. Bringing it back with you to the living room. "Here, she even wrapped it according to you."

"You say she like it still wasn't you?" Lilia sensed the disassociation with roommate she fell heavily for.

Your head shook, "I know that she wasn't me. I would've never made anything in bed that easy." Your smile was still the same though. Even if the eyes with it were full of contained wickedness and chaos. "Go on, pretty girl. Open it."

Her cheeks heated under your prominent gaze. You're right, you wouldn't have made sex easy. As she pulled out the white and yellow paper, she couldn't help to think of how the age gap has shifted. You were millenniums before her. She wasn't even close to one thousand. Her hands touched something cool. Grasping around it and pulling it up.

It was a ceramic card holder. The details being all so familiar to the witch. They were the same ones she painted long ago by her own hand. It was almost replicas of each card lining around the sides. But the cover was her most favorite part, the big queen of cups stared up at her. Except the difference was the color in curls. They weren't red and young like how Lilia's was, these were peppered like hers now. Like the face you had met.

"You knew?" Her eyes leaped to yours as her fingers couldn't help to take in every inch of texture.

Your head nodded slowly, "I always had an inkling I was missing something but I wasn't ever going to piece together the truth. And it was the amount of attention the card. I figured one plus one equals two... do you like it?"

"Baby I love it. Thank you." She whispered so gently. This time she leaned in. Her wised smile pressing to your goofy one. It felt natural already and made all the chaos you hold disappear into a void of knowledge.

She was someone you could get used to.

[liliapleasesteponme]

Bad girl

Lilia x rio x agatha (lithario)

Summary - smut. thats it. smut with no plot

Swearing, strap, mean!lilia, edging, begging, mommy kink, spanking, denial

Translations (we love sicilian speaking lilia) : amuri = love, lu me ciuri = my flower, cagna = bitch

TAGLIST - @mgruiz @multixfan @angeliccss @ilovepattilupone @renafisher27 @thegoddamnfeels @delusionalforolderwomen @lilia-calderus-pet-goat @bravewithacapitalb @live-laugh-love-lupone @lotus-ignis @lemz378 @yourbasicqueerie

"fuckfuckfuckfuckkk" was all Rio could say as Agathas hands snaked further around her thighs holding her legs open. Lilia continued to pound into her at a brutal pace.

Neither Agatha nor Rio actually knew why Lilia was being so rough today but neither were complaining.

As Lilia's strap brought Rio closer and closer to the release she was dying for, Agatha began to whine from the lack of attention from either of them.

"aww, you need some attention, amuri ? Has watching me edge Rio gotten you all worked up ?"

Lilia's words were sewn with faux sympathy but Agatha was so needy that all she could do was desperately nod her head. "you know what that means."

If she helped Agatha then Rio would be left on the edge again. She couldn't let that happen again. When it dawned on her what Lilia meant she began to beg in hopes of finally being able to cum.

"Agatha please―please don't ! I need this. I need to cum," Rio turned her head back to Lilia, "mommy please i-im so close"

Rio knew her begging was pathetic. Lilia never took kindly to begging, seeing it as futile, but in the moment she didn't care. Rio became so lost in her thoughts only to be pulled out of them by the sudden feeling of Lilia thrusting back into her.

Her thrusts were so forceful, giving Rio exactly what she craved. Once she reached the edge again, she was going to be to cum but before she could, she heard Lilia say, "what's the word ?"

"mommy."

"go on, lu me ciuri, cum for me."

Rio had never moaned so loud when she was finally allowed to cum, though it was quickly overshadowed by lilia pulling Agatha forward and onto her lap.

"think you can be a whining bitch and not get punished ?"

Agatha stayed silent.

"think again."

As she spoke, she gave Agatha a hard spank making her let out a small squeal. "i want you to count for me, cagna, i thinking 20."

Agatha turned her head to look at Lilia just to say, "yes mommy."

1...

2...

3...

4...

5...

"you see ? This is what you get for being an impatient, needy little bitch."

6...

7...

8...

9...

10...

The tenth spank was harder, making Agatha jump slightly. Rio, watching from the side, let out a soft moan at the scene in front of her.

11...

12...

13...

14...

15...

Lilia smirked at Agathas small whimpers of mercy. "you're doing so well, amuri, just a few more."

16...

17...

18...

19...

20...

A sigh of relief was let out when Agatha was done counting. She felt like she could finally breathe again "now tell me, what was it you wanted so badly ?"

"want you to use your tongue, please ?"

Lilia didn't say anything so Agatha tilted her head as if to ask the question again.

"no."

"what ?" Agatha asked desperately.

"i said no. Considering your attitude earlier, i think i'll make you wait."

[kayaksgay]

“I love you so, (Please let me go.)”

lilia calderu x reader

Warnings: Hurt no comfort, Character death, Angst.

AN: my finger slipped

———————————————————————

It had been years since Lilia had broken up with you. The scar she left on you never faded as some said it would. You missed her every day, even though she had told you to forget about her.

She was a forgotten witch after all, yet you never had forgotten her. She was your everything, you’d remember her for as long as you lived.

“Sooo anyone neww?” Your friend’s voice snapped you out of your trance. She had been determined to set you up for months now, yet you insisted you never had time. Yet the real reason was as simple as Lilia remained on your mind.

I love you so,

“Nope.” You’d say, hoping they’d drop the topic. You knew they saw through you, but were gracious enough to not call you out on your lies.

“When will you just forget about her? She forgot about you.” They’d say, realizing how harsh it sounded, they instantly tried to apologize.

It was too late, the damage done. “I love her! She didn’t forget about me, she wouldn’t do that.” Your voice broke. You pushed yourself up, refusing to look back towards your friend. The bell above the door ringing as you left the coffee shop.

You rounded the corner, once you made your friend didn’t follow you, you relaxed slightly. God you missed her. It had been only a few years since Lilia’s death, yet it hurt. She had broken up with you not too long before she went on that stupid road.

Your hand moved to the necklace you had on. It was one she had given to you at the beginning of your relationship. A tear fell as you rubbed your thumb over it.

All Lilia could do was watch, as you cried and mourned her.

Please let me go.

[vicky-0933]

This my second story, I made this one longer. I also add a word from my native language for you.

Meaning- Thur na pop- Sunflower

————————————————————————

Found you.

“What the fuck” you whisper to your self, trying to study the different types of witchcraft, flipping through the pages of the book, you come across a page about divenation, “huh, who is this”, looking closer you see the name “Lilia Calderu”. Reading about her, you can feel something about her that draws you to her, as you read you see her through different times, “so witches do live for a long time” you say with smile.

Then you get to the end and see a psychic address, you felt like you had to go there, so you close the book and take it with you. Going to your car, you stop, {is this the right thing to do} you thought, you look at the book and turn to the page again, leaning on your car, take your time to her picture again. You start remember things you don’t again, {what’s going on} you thought.

{fine, let’s go see then} you thought again and open your car and go in, “Lets go see her” you tell your self, putting the address on your phone and turn on your car, and start to drive to the location. While driving, you start to feel nervous, “what’s going on with you, your just to see this lady.. who is a witch that has been alive for a long time, but that’s not a problem now, right” you ask yourself.

Getting more nervous as you start to get closer to the place. You start to get remember things you never thought you could. {why am I remembering these things} you thought as you pulled up to the place. “Here we go” you told your self, putting your things in your backpack and getting out of the car.

Standing at the entrance, you prepare yourself and walk in the place. The bell ring from on top of you, looking around you start to remember things from what looks like the past, then you see a picture of the witch but you seem to realize that someone that looks exactly like you is in that picture too. “Hello dear, how can I help you” a voice comes out, you turn to see the famous witch from the book.

“Lilia Calderu” you ask and she nods, “I am Yn Ln, I am studying the different types of witchcraft, so I came to visit it you to ask some questions.” You said, wanting to say more but you stopped, she nods again and motions you to sit down, which you take a seat. You both just sit there with silence, but you wonder why there are pictures of the both of you all over her place.

“why am I remembering these memories” you ask first, “you don’t remember do you” she asks you. You shake your head no, she sighs, getting up to grabbing a book, “the reason why you don’t remember me, “us” really, is because you were cursed to never find me again, never remember us, or what we did, but somehow you found me and came to me” she says sitting next you, leaving space between you.

“This was yours” she slips the book towards you, “when we were together, you would write everything about us, and like you are doing right now, studying witchcraft, then one day a witch came by and cursed you to forget me. Then you disappeared, and I tried you find you and I couldn’t, then I stopped looking for giving up all hope.” She stops for a little bit.

“But there was something that she said, “if she finds you again and remembers, you should be granted” and ever since I have been hoping you’ve found me” she stops there again, “And” You ask but she didn’t answer, you were going to ask again until she grabs your face, “please remember, please remember me” she pleads and start crying, you grab her face then you gasp, your mind start to go through memories from the past, but one sticks out.

—————————1576———————————

“Sweetheart, open your eyes” a voice tells you and you open your eyes, you see her, “what’s going on in your mind love, hmm” she asks moving some hair out of your face and cupping your cheek, “Nothing, Thur na pop. Just being here with you” you say bring her into a hug. “I found something for you” she tells you, letting go, and giving you a flower that is so bright in the sun, “oh my, thank you my love” you said. You both laugh, and walk down the little river, but soon you stop her, “Love” you tell her and she turns around, looking at you and you start to feel nervous.

“Dear, what’s wrong? Did something happen” she ask in a panic voice, you shake your head no, looking around, you look at her, the way the sun shines behind her giving her a brighter look. “Lilia, I want you to know that, you are the love of my life, I want to spend every day with you. You make me happy, and now that you helped me get out of my terrible life. I want to ask” you say while getting down on one knee, “will you with me for the rest of my life, will you marry me” you ask, showing two rings, one for her and one for you.

She doesn’t say anything, and just looks at you. You look at her with happy eyes and when she doesn’t say anything, you start to feel like you made the biggest mistake and get up but before you can go, she hugs you, which surprised you. She then grabs your face and kisses you, then whispers “Yes I will” and you smile and kiss her again, slipping the ring on her finger, then she does the same for you. You were about to say something when it all went black.

———————-2026—————————

You gasp, out of the memory, all you see is her chocolate eyes, “Lily” you say and she brightens up, “My love, it’s you” you say and hug her, you both start crying. “I remember now, I remember everything about us.” You said, she smiles and cups your face making you look at her, “It-“ she was about to say until someone comes in, you both look and Lilia stands up and get in front you.

The lady start to walk towards the both of you, “Don’t, don’t come near her” Lilia says and you stand up, going behind her, the lady chuckles, “you promised” Lilia cries out, “Promised what” you ask. You take a better look at the women in front of you, she wears almost all red, dark hair, and blue eyes. “Wait” you say, both Lilia and the dark haired woman looks at you, “I know who you are” you said, the lady looking surprised.

“Mother” you said and Lilia’s heart drops, “Well Yn, looks like you were finally able to find her” Your mother said. “Why? Why did you do that?” You ask in an angry tone, “you were supposed marry someone else, not her” your mother said, you look down at Lilia’s finger and see the ring you gave her then yours. “Now looks like I have to make sure I make it stronger this time” your mother says, you close your eyes, she put her hand up making magic go into your mind but then something makes her jerk back.

When you open your eyes, they turned blue, “NO YOU WONT” you yelled and raised up your hand and blast your mom with blue magic, and she yelps in pain, “YOU TOOK EVERYTHING FROM ME” you yelled again, your mother looks at you, and gasps, you are glowing in deep blue, Lilia stepped back a bit, feeling all the power you have. Your mother stands up, “How? How are you doing this” she asks you, you didn’t answer and just put your hand, and you start to choke her.

She gasps, and you lift her up, Lilia gasp and looks at you, then she goes to you, putting her hands on your shoulder and whispers, “Sweetheart stop. Let her go”. You hear her voice and soften up, putting down your hand, letting your hand go down, letting go of your mom. She is gasping for breath, you walk to your mother and she looks at you. “Don’t you ever do this again, Don’t EVER interfere with my life again” you tell her, and she gets up, “You don’t know what you just did” she tells you.

“No, what I did was something that I did for myself, not taken control over you” you tell her, “Now leave”. She looks at the both you then leaves, and you just stand there, until you feel someone next to you and grab your face. All you see Lilia’s face, “You did it” Lilia says chuckling, “I did it” you say and kiss her. She is surprised and chuckles into the kiss and finally you were able to figure out where you going to be with forever.

[aggieharkness]

And in her arms, she cradled your heart Chp. 3

Pairing: Lilia Calderu x reader

Summary: if I ever lose you, lay me down beside you, as your presence was my life, and not having you in my arms will be my death. Dress me in your kisses and throw roses at my feet, for if I don't wake from this nightmare to your bright eyes loving me I don't wish to draw breath anymore.

Warnings: smut (+18), affair, oral (Lilia receiving), fingering (Lilia receiving), tit play, nightmares, mention of blood, storms, fluff, angst/comfort, pregnancy, age gap, magical conception.

Author's note: I'm back!!! I have risen from the dead and escaped the claws of academic life to drop this new chapter. I hope you all like it, and there is a reason why there are no dialogues whatsoever. Special shout-out to @bravewithacapitalb for being my Beta Reader and my medical advisor for this whole project. You are an angel. Please, do tell me how it looks, if you like it or if there are things I need to change. I accept constructive criticism, and if there's anything you might want to see in this story, don't hesitate to ask, I'll add it to the best extent I can. Also available on Ao3. Finally, let's thank Patti Lupone for giving us Lilia Calderu, and Jac for writing her so beautifully.

Chp. 1 Chp. 2

Word count: 15K

Night breezes seem to whisper, "I love you"

It was odd with how much ease the crystal-clear skies had filled with clouds. The dark, calm veil of the night had been turned into a sea of thunder and lightning that ripped through the air in booming sounds that made the ground rumble. Their eclectic shapes and sharp edges sliced through the clouds, casting such bright lights high up in the sky that one would think it was morning already, but it was far from it. The loss of power all throughout that city was witness to the shadows that paraded through the streets when there was no sign of lightning in the sky. Pillars of buildings and houses shook under the strength of the thunder, a scream or two escaping mouths at the sudden noise, but they were drowned, forgotten, under the splendour of mother nature.

At moments like this gentle tendrils of sage magic snaked around your limbs like silks that caressed your skin. Rain poured hard onto the ground, hitting the glass by the front door and the windows with such force that you had feared for a moment they might break, letting the cold air inside the house, but the thought vanished as if the raindrops were washing over you, falling on your skin in a perfect rhythm that matched your heart. There was no moon, no light that could bathe the room, but you weren’t scared of the creatures that hid in the darkness, their piercing eyes stalking, waiting to be let in; those beings lived in the depths of your mind and as real as they seemed to you, they were nothing but dust this time around. They could not claw their way out of your mind to haunt you and chase you, to make you feel terror and to make all those doubts that had rendered you almost speechless only a few hours ago real before your eyes.

They had tried though, and the last echoes of a nightmare you could not remember were beginning to dissipate with the rain. The only lingering image that was becoming blurrier with each passing second was that of Lilia lying in bed, pretty much like she was right now, her chest rising and falling in steady breaths under the covers, but her pristine nightgown had been a sea of blood and tears that still made you shake from your position by the kitchen window. You could smell it, that metallic stench that was engraved in the back of your mind, and yet the truth was that she was perfectly alright, sleeping peacefully. Another lightning strike sliced through the sky, filling the room for an instant with a bright white halo that granted you a moment, a second in time, to see her perfect face.

Every inch of her olive-kissed skin was a fantasy for you, a forbidden fruit that you could not keep your eyes off, following the small wrinkles on her forehead whenever she frowned, might it be in frustration or concentration, that now were non-existent in the calmness of her slumber, the shape of her long dark lashes resting over her cheeks, those deep brown eyes of hers hidden behind her eyelids, your heart yearning every minute of every day to get lost in them. Every glance you got from them, every moment when she rested her gaze upon your frame or locked eyes with yours you felt as if the world had stopped spinning, the universe still as the breath in your lungs hitched. You drowned every single time in them. A sea of melted chocolate that enfolded you and held you as you felt your body fall down the abyss of her mind, every thought and memory laying bare before you as you drank her in, the calmness of her nature, feeling every sensation as if you were her.

It was dizzying, even now, to imagine yourself in that position, so close to her that you could feel the heat emanating from her body as you got lost in her big doe eyes that hid nothing from you. The shape of her nose was next in this journey you were making, elongated, slightly curved, and with the hint of a bump near the bridge. It wasn’t the usual button-like nose that every girl wished for, Lilia’s had personality, a beauty in itself that you adored with every fibre of your being, a glimpse into certain Mediterranean traits that you held dear in your heart. She had a nose that reminded you of your ancestors, of people you had cherished deeply until their very last days, people that you could only now visit through pictures in an old album that rested in a drawer under the telly. To a certain extent, and as weird as you were aware it sounded, every time you saw it, it reminded you of home.

Every little thing she did reminded you of home. Her citrusy perfume took you back to the field of orange blossoms and summer by the coast, the way her hands moved with every single word she said as if that could give her speech a more emphatic aura as if the message could be understood better. People gave her strange looks whenever you were in public, but to you, it’s a most endearing quality that you wished she’d never lose. The light had grown dimmer as your eyes had moved to her cheeks, a rosy pearly tint over her skin that she had been carrying with her for weeks now, that glow that everyone talked about, you suppose, when a lady became with child. Either way, it enthralled you and captured your eyes before they moved on to her lips.

They were slightly parted, a thin line separating them as the plump flesh glistened under the last few instants of light, her lip balm adding a gentle translucent cherry tone to them. You had memorised the feeling of the soft flesh deep within your mind every single time you had shared a kiss, the taste of her a continuous lingering flavour on your taste buds, those rich honey tones that dripped thickly onto your mouth with each breath that ghosted over your lips, the sweetness sending a rush through your body every time, without fail. She breathed life into your lungs whenever she brushed them against yours, a smile creeping up when you weren’t looking as she observed how you worked when you sat on the grass sketching bumblebees that floated lazily in between the flowers. Smirks were also one of her best features, her lips curling lopsided whenever she snickered, whenever she tried to tempt you, your body falling under her spell without a fight.

That mouth of hers was heavenly as much as it was sinful and every word that fell from her rosy lips seemed to always be laced with love and care, truths that she could not hide, would not hide. You were almost as taken by them as her eyes. You could not tear your gaze away when she spoke, watching how they moved, how her teeth bit down gently on her lower lip when she was busy doing tarot readings, her full attention on the cards, the way she murmured chants when she prepared altars and spells, hypnotised at most. But it was when they were pressed against your skin, on the crook of your neck, that you adored them the most, when she whispered sweet nothings as if your flesh would suddenly appear tattooed with them, forever engraved on your body for the world to see. It was maddening to think about those things when they rested slightly ajar in peaceful slumber before you.

The room was filled with darkness once more, but your eyes had adjusted well to the lack of light, and in the safety of the shadows, leaves, and branches waying under the force of the rainfall, it was as if you could still see her, clear as day, laying on your bed. There were small freckles painted all over her body, constellations that had fallen from the firmament and become flesh, the depths and secrets of the universe written in every inch of skin that you had ever cherished and kissed. You had followed them like a castaway in search of water, drinking in every story that was reflected on her flesh, every scar and wound that your lips had kissed, almost as if the memories attached could be soothed by that simple action. No matter how many times you looked at her perfect face it was as if beauty had just been presented to you, a Venus that walked the Earth, running away from the canvas where she belonged.

Just a second later thunder roared high above your heads, the walls and windows shaking at the terrorizing sound, but Lilia didn’t stir, the emotions of the day having drained her completely, or that’s what you thought. In truth, she had been awake since you had got up, the sudden chill on her side and the feeling of your weight lifting off the bed calling her from Morpheus arms back down to Earth. She would have sat in bed and asked you what was wrong, but she sensed that you needed to be left to your own thoughts this time, even if she missed having your arms around her waist. She made no attempt to move or even open her eyes, but she could feel your loving gaze on her as the sound of the rain filled her half-asleep head, almost lulling her back into those dreams that had slipped through her fingers, and she could not recall anymore.

Your fingers ached to touch her, to feel that ever so soft flesh under your palms but you could not bring yourself to do so, afraid you might disturb her. When she was asleep there was no danger of gaps or visions overtaking her mind, pausing her life, even if it was for a moment, leaving her confused and upset in most cases, when she was asleep there was a whole world just for Lilia where there was no pain, no past, present or future haunting her every waking moment, only what her subconscious wanted. Dreams that you had many times wondered what they were, and if you were in them. If only you knew that every single one of them was shaped around, you. It did not matter the scenery; it could be a cottage in the English countryside, roses growing tall in the garden with an archway of violet wisterias making way to the blue wooden front door where a brass hand worked as the knocker, tall magnolia trees swaying in the chilly breeze.

Or a small house in Siracusa, surrounded by water, lost in between cliffs of sandy tones as the outside of the house lay filled with plumerias and emerald green grass that flourished around the property, getting lost in the horizon. She could almost smell the salty breeze when she dreamt of it, and she could almost make out the sound of the small sparrows and see the seagulls tracing the outlines of the coast, letting her entire being be dragged deeply into those dreams that took her back home. The sound of the waves against the rocks still lingered in the back of her mind, calling out to her like sirens that wished for her to return to sleep, but curiosity peeked as she felt your eyes on her, and she fought against them to remain awake. Still, they swirled in between her thoughts like lazy fish that swam in between seaweed.

They left the taste of homemade coffee on her tongue, the floral perfume that mixed with the salty air filling her lungs as she stood on the edge of the cliff. Every single time she found herself there, barefoot, a deep navy dress embracing her figure as the breeze made it twirl around her legs, the warm sun bathing her skin with gentle beams in a way that she hadn’t felt in centuries. In those moments, safely tucked in the depths of her brain, she could live the life she had always dreamt of, no death or pain, only the sound of the sea and the feeling of the sun. And then, stepping out of the small villa you would appear, breaking her gaze from the sea before her, its deep blue waters crashing and swirling underneath the cliffs, your hair glowing under the bright golden light of day, your eyes shining as they locked with hers, a simple white dress draped over your body like strings of pearls on your alabaster skin.

Part of her knew that it wasn’t real, but her breath still hitched in her lungs at the sight, the grass under her feet soft and cool against the warm breeze as she made her way to you, hands reaching for hands, lips begging for lips. Your skin always felt the same, soft under her palms, fingers interlacing in a grasp that she never wanted to let go of, your perfume overtaking everything else in her lungs. Dreams are such wonderful things and yet whenever her subconscious wakes up and the coast vanishes into a white fog, your face is the last thing that Lilia’s mind remembers before it all turns into smoke but there is no sorrow for what she had lost. When she opens her eyes the first thing she sees is you and all those moments shared in faraway places, the kisses that she could almost feel against her lips are still there, real in a special way, her eyes lingering on your peacefully sleeping form right beside her.

If only you truly knew what went on in her sleep. You would slip into her dreams with the ease of sitting in a chair to have a cup of coffee, highly doubting you would ever want to wake up, but those fantasies were hers to keep, secrets that she didn’t need to share with anyone but herself. In the darkness of the room the last few sounds of waves mixed with the storm in Lilia’s mind, the rumbling of the thunder startling her and causing her body to jerk slightly, maybe an inch, on the bed, but her eyes remained closed. She had a feeling you had her exactly where you wanted her, and she was curious to see why it was so. Your hands rested on the kitchen counter knowing that the darkness that had the entire city trapped in its claws protected your greedy eyes, roaming over her face one more time even if you could only make out the shape of her profile. In those two years you had been with her you had made it your mission to memorise her, to engrave her entire body with fire in your brain, every wrinkle above her upper lip, all the tiny, almost invisible freckles that were sprinkled on her skin, the lines around and under her eyes from centuries of both happiness and sadness pulling the strings of your heart tenderly every time she smiled.

She had never tried to look younger; she knew how old she was, and it was never in her mind to hide it, after all, time passes for everyone and she was no exception, she simply let nature reach the point in life where she felt most comfortable in and stayed like that. Time brought wisdom along with it and it was unavoidable to add age to that mix. Lilia wasn’t one to let her looks guide her existence, there had been many other things that had worried her far more than her looks. But every sign reflected on her body that spoke about how she wasn’t a beautiful young girl anymore weighted heavily sometimes on her shoulders, the passing of the centuries leaving an imprint that nothing could erase. Your eyes kissed every spot that she had ever felt insecure about, your lips cherished the marks time had left behind, from scars to wrinkles, wishing to show her what words could not make justice to. Every inch of her body was as perfect as was her messy mind, as was her velvety voice and her caring words.

She had worried that the age gap might cause trouble, that you would not understand her, that her kookiness mixed with the half a millennium that she carried in her bones would make you change your mind at the slightest opportunity, but every morning she woke up in your arms, your breath warm against her shoulder blades she convinced herself a little bit more that you weren’t going to leave. You had seen her at her worst, screaming in terror as her visions took over her mind, tears burning her cheeks in despair and yet you had stayed, comforted her, held her and whispered sweet nothings to sooth her. You had taken care of her in those moments when she dissociated for hours, making sure she was never cold and ensuring she stayed hydrated even if Lilia’s reflexes were slow and taking a single sip of water was a herculean task. Still, you stayed. Every day you stayed by her, woke up and went to be with her in your arms, laughed at her jokes, cooked and cuddled on the couch to watch Colombo or Murder, She Wrote, and every time she glanced at you the small bubble of doubts and fears that had claimed her heart the moment you had agreed to go out with her, would become smaller and smaller.

To you, she could be five thousand years old, and you would still love her no matter what, through thick and thin, in sickness and in health until death do you part. The sound of the clock ticking on the wall was drowned by the even heavier rain that poured outside, the water drops slamming against the glass causing you to turn around and watch mesmerised by the way it fell over the trees and flowers, flooding the grass but never reaching the kitchen door. It seemed as if the weather was angry, furious at the world, but you could not understand as to why, everything had been calm only a couple of hours ago, balanced, and now it was as if something was off, but it had nothing to do with you or Lilia. A flash of red crossed your mind, thick blood that dripped over the window for an instant before your eyes blinked and the crimson liquid turned back to crystal clear rain, your senses spiking only to quiet down again. Just as quickly as it had happened it was gone along with the feeling that something was wrong.

Perhaps those little creatures that plagued your mind were not as controlled as you thought. A quiet ruffling of fabric startled you, causing you to turn around to see Lilia turning on her side, sitting down on the bed as the covers fell in slow waves of her body, coming to gather around her hips, a strap from her white nightgown falling off her shoulder. You had not heard it, but a frightened gasp had escaped your lips at the sight of the blood, a hallucination you could not understand, and the gentle lazy curiosity that had wrapped around Lilia’s body had snapped quickly at the sound, worry filling her chest. You hadn’t even realised the way you heart had sped up for a few instants. Her curls framed her face, ringlets that caressed her cheeks, draping over her exposed shoulders in a veil of peppery curls that suited her and matched her dark eyes, contrasting with the pearly shade of her gown. Both her hands were pressed firmly on the mattress even if she was sitting on her side observing you, holding your gaze amongst the shadows of the room.

Another bout of lightning sliced through the sky, white beams breaking in and bathing the room once more even if it only lasted a few seconds. The way it had enveloped Lilia’s frame in a mix of pearly white and pink hues, making her skin glow in a halo of beauty and magic had your breath hitched in your lungs, her eyes glistening for less than an instant under the light with a calm but worried look, asking without uttering a word. You could not help but take in the flesh that was exposed to the night air, her neckline long, creamy, and soft as your fingers twitched in need, small wrinkles and freckles hand painted with all the care and perfection of an artist, no necklace that kept her skin from your lips, an obstacle most days when all you wanted to do was kiss her senseless. She was not one to show off that much skin, her shoulders only dressed in thin straps, at least one of them, the other completely bare for your hungry eyes to feast on.

With each breath you took your body separated from the counter, taking slow steps towards her and Lilia simply waited for you to reach her. Beauty marks danced on her flesh, sprawled over her chest, plunging deep in between her breasts, over her shoulders and down her arms, spots on the back of her veiny hands, one of the marks that you loved the most. They were small, nearly invisible to the naked eye, but you knew every inch of her, and even as the light faded, and the room became bathed in darkness once more you could trace, and pint point to every single one as if your life depended on it. She was your lifeline, your protector and your saviour, and as your steps got you closer to the bed your thoughts pushed the last remnants of the nightmare and the hallucination to the back of your mind so only one could remain. She was not only the most important woman you had ever met, the one that carried your heart and loved you, with all your virtues and faults, but she was now also the mother of your child as well, and seeing her sitting there, so innocent, waiting for you to tell her what was wrong you felt your heart melt.

No number of nightmares, of tears shed by your subconscious as Lilia laid in bed in her own world of fear and despair, your hands cradling her face in hopes of making everything right again, of taking her pain and making it yours so she would not suffer even if your heart was bleeding just as much, could compare to reality. They were just images that your own mind created to cope with the fear and terror of this new chapter in life, those horrible creatures that crawled inside your own head making everything ten times worse but Lilia was right there, her head slightly tilted to the side as her breasts spilled ever so slightly from the neckline of her nightgown, the lace cupping them tenderly. There was an irrational need to feel her under your palms, for your thoughts to realise that this, was in fact, reality and not just some fear-induced pantomime that would soon turn into horror.

Your knees collided gently with the edge of the mattress, and your hands, that had been writhing and toying in anxiety with the hem of your shirt, laid firmly on the bed now, guiding you in the dark as you climbed over the bedsheets towards her. What if everything had been but a dream? A desire so deep to be something more with Lilia, to take a bigger step and create something meaningful and beautiful with her that your own brain had tricked you in your sleep? She could almost feel the wheels turning in your head, the way your body trembled with the doubts and worry in that unique way of yours that she had grown accustomed to. And yet she did not move. Her deep eyes held your gaze as best they could in the dark, the sound of the rain fading to the background as your body got closer to her, your fingers brushing over hers accidentally, a motion that sent sparks up your arms, that sweet electricity that you could never get enough of. Her golden mixed perfectly with your sage, and that simple feeling, her skin warm and soft under your fingertips, assured you that this was as real as the moon, the starts, the sun and everything that surrounded you both. She was as real as the cold rain that fell outside, as the morning mist that bathed petals and leaves alike, small gentle drops that scurried down the smooth surfaces as the sun travelled higher in the sky until they fell and collapsed against the ground. Real as the bird songs that accompanied dawn and bid farewell at dusk, as real as the hands that cradled her face and the feeling of her warm cheeks under your palms. How could your entire world have shrunk to the size of the woman sitting in bed?

She was the most important being in your existence, she had been for two whole years and you still could not fully comprehend the fact that she was yours and you were hers, a whole eternity before you to live beside her, to cherish and hold her and love her until there was not a single speck of air left in you. Your thumbs rubbed her skin softly, fingertips pushing solitary peppery ringlets away from her face as her breath became a bit more hurried, her bosom heavy under the white lace, her hands unmoving from where they laid over the covers. How had life granted you such a gift, a prize in a competition you hadn’t even realised you had assigned to, that day you had crossed her threshold the sweetest memory, the smell of incense and vanilla still vivid in your mind, the house now filled with herbs and citrusy aromas that floated in between chairs and shelves and that lingered on Lilia’s skin? Rich like spices, sublime like honey, and deep, so very deep and intoxicating as the perfect wine. She called to you with her eyes, with the way her lips parted ever so slightly as if she wanted to whisper a thousand secrets to you, and yet not a sound came out, only the feeling of her hot breath ghosting over your nose and mouth as your body bend forward slowly never steering your eyes from hers, letting her thoughts travel and dance among yours in a calming ritual.   

She saw your pain, your anguish as the last few blurry images of your nightmare fought to stay, to haunt you and break you inch by inch, and as the sensations wrapped around her, your mind pleaded to be released of such burdens. You didn’t want to think of her bleeding, crying as the child you both wanted and loved so much already parted from her body before its time, and you did try to keep that image away from her, not wanting to scare her or even terrify her, but she had pushed through, and you couldn’t help but give in. They played on a loop, your fingers digging on the side of her face hoping that it would not unsettle her, bring forth worries that she had not voiced as the news of the child she would in a few months’ time bring into the world sunk in, her own mind comprehending her current situation but her body didn’t shaky, unlike yours, the touch of her fingertips against your knees reassuring, grounding. Golden tendrils pushed them away, love and care melting them until there was nothing left but her comforting presence in your head, no more blood, no more lingering sounds of tears and sobs, no more thoughts of loss and grief. Breathing deeply as the grip of terror released you, your lungs filled with her perfume, clinging to her skin almost as if it was part of her, the sharp tinges of oranges and lemons cutting through the air and filling your body with her essence.

Lilia knew how it felt to have demons chasing her, clawing at her at every waking moment, making her weak until she could only kneel on the floor in despair, and although you were no stranger to pain, she didn’t want you to suffer what she knew so well. You held her gaps and vision at bay whenever you were with her, loving her, whispering in her ear, and kissing her sorrows until they vanished into the ether; she was well accomplished on many branches of magic and dominating and transforming thoughts was one of them. The chaos that had unravelled in your mind stood still now, only silence in between your thoughts. Slowly Lilia had threaded her golden strings with yours, connecting each other as your own mind fought against you and now that your thoughts were tranquil, lazily floating around, you could feel her deep within you as the downpour happening outside became barely audible to either of you with each passing second.  

Her face was barely inches from yours and yet she made no effort to move from your grasp, the touch of her hands brushing your naked knees, your thumbs tracing the shape of her cheekbone before moving down to her lips, plump, quiet. Her hot breath teased the skin of your hand, but her eyes never left yours, not for a single instant, not even when the touch of your fingers travelled over her lower lip, smearing her balm. With barely time to think you pulled her towards you, crashing your mouth against hers in what started out as a gentle tender kiss to ground yourself, to put a final end to the questions that had overwhelmed you only a few moments ago, her body firm and hot under your palms, her lips soft and impossibly sweet, your tongue tracing and pushing gently against her mouth. She granted you access without a fight, willing to give you whatever you so desperately craved after what you had seen.

She could have reassured you that it was not real, that everything would be fine, but it would have been futile, her words would have been brushed off as just that, words; you were someone who craved actions who believed that hands holding hands could do much more than a reassurance spoken in hushed tones, at least in these situations. Lilia though, was the opposite; she thrived in hearing you say that everything would work out, she held onto your every word as if they carried the meaning of the universe and you had both established an understanding that not many people would agree with. You only needed her, her body, her skin touching yours, her aroma and her steady breaths while she needed your understanding nature, your soothing loving whispers and all that went along with it. Thunder rumbled closer to the house, the windows rattling against the sound but to you both it was more of a soft noise in the background, hardly audible and therefore barely disturbing.

As Lilia’s lips parted your motions became more frantic, perhaps even needy, your tongue battling hers, tracing the outline of her teeth as your hands held onto her face a little bit more harshly pulling her even closer and holding her against you. The action, surprising, an air of control and desperation tainting every one of your movements caused a surprised quiet yelp to escape her but just as your lips clumsily parted from hers to bite down on her lower lip it melted into a moan that vibrated up her throat. It was hardly pain that Lilia felt, but the sudden discomfort as your canines left an imprint on her swollen lips sent shivers down her spine, delightfully drawing her completely awake, every one of her senses spiking as the darkness that enfolded the room, not even the flicker of a candle visible, made the feeling of your hands on her a most divine and maddening sensation. It was odd how easily a simple action such as the touch of your thumb over her jawline or your fingers brushing her curls off her shoulder to expose her neck would send her into overdrive. Part of her thought that maybe she should stop you, and talk with you about the nightmare but the logical part of her, the one that knew you and could read you like an open book, spoke to her in a reasonable manner.

You needed her, and she would willingly give herself to you, every inch of her being, come rain or fog, hailstorms or earthquakes. Her body responded to your touch, aching for more than just tender brushes of your fingers, and as your thumb traced her lower lip once more Lilia’s hands travelled up your thighs, coming to rest on your hips but she didn’t pull you closer, simply let the feeling of the bare skin of your midriff under her palms satiate the ever-growing need she had for you, at least for the moment. A gasp nearly fell from your lips, but it never made its way out, your mouth falling in desperate kisses over the soft flesh of her jaw, a happy hum vibrating from her chest in approval. With each kiss a spark of electricity met your lips, shocking and yet delicious, not only her body luring you in, making you fall off the edge to kneel before her, cherish her and drink in her every move, her every sound and noise as if she was the only thing you needed to live, her skin your Bible, her body the only path you would ever walk, her every wrinkle a crossroad in which you would love to get lost on forever.

Sweet as honey and soft as silk her skin made you dizzy as with each kiss you journeyed down to her neck, that creamy column delicious as you licked, teeth scraping the flesh leaving red angry marks behind, but you never drew blood, not this time. A whimper echoed inside the room, falling from her parted lips as the grip on your hips became harder, the need to touch you and press you against her growing almost as quickly as the arousal that was burning through every cell. With a gentle lick you soothed the mark before continuing, tender pecks making up for the pain, not that Lilia minded. Lilia felt the way your fingers threaded through her curls, twirling without pulling, your other hand tracing the shape of her neck and chest, fingering the neckline of her gown. Lightning snapped high up in the sky, ripping the stillness of the clouds in sharp lines that bathed the room in white and pink, perhaps even a hue of purple that contrasted with Lilia’s skin and clothes, though you were unbothered by it.

There was no need for light, your lips knowing perfectly well where to go to draw out lustful gasps from her, to make her hands shoot out to hold you in place, but it was beautiful to see that gentle pink hue painting her cheeks fading as her gown covered her body, hiding it from your hungry sight. Her brown eyes remained on your form for a few moments adoring the way you worshipped her, closing as your kisses reached the hollow of her neck, savouring the way she melted under your tongue, tastebuds drunk in the sweetness of her skin, completely lost as her chest rose and fell in fast breaths. Divine Mother, you just could not get enough of her, lips kissing and licking the swells of her breasts, your face moving with each breath she took, the grip on your hips almost bruising, but you needed more, you needed to have her underneath you writhing in passion, holding onto you as her world exploded in pleasure, remaining real under your touch.

The simple feeling of your fingers on the neckline of her dressing gown had sent a jolt of pleasure down to her core, her breasts heavy and ever so sensitive, now understanding that it was due to the pregnancy, but when your lips had made contact, kisses tender and gentle, your tongue brushing softly over her skin, she had not been able to prevent a moan from escaping her mouth, the sensations so deep that Lilia’s body temperature suddenly rose several degrees, fire coursing through her veins. Of course, the reaction had not gone unnoticed by you, remembering that Lilia hadn’t been able to use her lacy bras due to being incredibly oversensitive to the touch, a sign that should have given it all away really. With one last peck, you pulled away, watching how she had her head lulled back ever so slightly, eyes closed while her mouth remained ajar, her flesh flushed. Even in the dark, you could feel the heat of her body against your cooler body, the light of the storm having faded a few minutes before, encasing you both in shadows that burned in lust, that drove your mind into a hunger for her that filled your mind with a crazy haze.

But your hands were still kind against her body, fingers pushing her peppery ringlets to her back as your other hand followed the lace of the neckline towards the strap that held the nightgown up around her body. As the pads of your fingertips caressed the skin under the thin string goosebumps rose all over Lilia’s body, watching mesmerised the way your hand pushed it off her shoulder, the flowy fabric of her gown moving like water over the shape of her breasts, lace brushing over her nipples as the straps slid down her arms, a gasp reaching your ears like an angels song, the material gathering around her waist, leaving her perfect upper body bare for your greedy eyes to devour, sinful thoughts filling your head as her arms moved to be released from the gown. The worry and terror that had taken you hostage was barely a memory, Lilia’s hands holding onto yours as much as her magic kept your chaotic mind at ease.

Bare before you all you wanted to do was bury your face in between her breasts and never let go but then again you would not see the ecstasy in her eyes, the love and pleasure that poured out of them like rivers of dark chocolate that overwhelmed your tongue and drove your mouth to taste her with renewed fervour, and you most certainly wanted to hold her gaze as you brought her to the edge and back, accompanying as she fell into the abyss of pleasure and passion that you had brought back into her life. The sight was simple divine, sublime as your eyes raked over her form with very little discretion, devouring every inch of the now exposed skin as if you had never seen it before. Without support her bosom sagged a little but that didn’t deter you from bending forward and placing soft kisses on the top of each breast, your lips casting featherlike touches on her skin that sent her mind reeling. Perhaps you were teasing her, she thought, but the look of utter devotion in your eyes proved otherwise as you sat on the heels of your feet to observe the way that gorgeous blush of hers had made its way down her chest and into the valley between her breasts, hidden underneath her ample bosom that rose and fell with each breath, taunting and desperate for your touch.

Noticing how lost you were in your own dreams and ideas of what you would do to her she took the next step for you and grabbed the hands that rested on top of her thighs, covered by her nightgown and blanket, and brought them to her waist, a little bit higher if you were being honest. The back of your hands brushed the soft skin underneath her bosom, sending a shiver down your spine that matched the goosebumps on Lilia’s skin, swollen lips parted as she tried to push air into her lungs. The way her body molded to your hands, to your tender touch around her ribcage, was grounding, feeling her heat, scorching your fingers though you never wanted to let go, the rush of blood in her veins, the way her magic bubbled under her flesh like rivers of gold. A little voice inside your head wondered if maybe you should try to explain why the sudden need to have her but as much as you parted your lips to speak nothing came out.

There was no need though. Lilia understood, your silence confirmation that that nightmare had shaken you to your core more than she had realised, and as her eyes raked over your perfect face, hating the way your eyebrows furrowed as you flagellated yourself for not being able to voice your fears and worries, she took matters into her own hands. She would take care of you for the time being, until you were ready to regain control. Her movements were slow, and deliberate as she traced the shape of your forearms with her fingers, trails of fire left behind as her hands held onto your upper arms and shoulders. It came naturally to her to care for others and as the minutes clocked by, the storm showing no signs of stopping, it was easy to want to comfort and love you, her touch kind and gentle as she cradled your face in her hands, drawing you closer until your face was barely an inch from hers. Your life had changed completely in a matter of hours, a whole new future displayed before you as if you could choose, as if Lilia’s well-being and happiness rested in the palm of your hands, but it was an illusion.

You didn’t have that kind of power, and it terrified you to think how different things would be, that dangers you had never even thought of were now your worst enemies, terrors and monsters that could in the blink of an eye take her and your baby from you. A single tear fell down your cheek, bitter and cold against your skin and it took you both and her by surprise, not thinking that this fear ran so deep within you, afraid that her solid body would fade into nothing under your palms. It broke Lilia’s heart to see you so lost, worry painting your features when only a minute before lust had cast shadows over your face. The lonely crystal drop was wiped by her thumb, the gesture comforting in a way that you could not describe, the feeling of her breath on your lips assuring you that she was alive and well and that she would remain so for as long as she could, a peppery curl escaping from behind her ear and coming to caress your cheek, the softness of her hair a perfect companion to her caring touch.

Having her so close you could count the freckles on the tip of her nose felt as if you had both feet firmly planted on the ground all of a sudden, whiffs of lavender from her shampoo clouding your mind in an exquisite fog that stopped the shaking of your trembling frame. In slow motion the gap between you vanished and the instant her lips landed softly over yours your entire world melted on her tongue, her fingers ripping from your veins the terror that was festering in your blood, with each caress. She didn’t ask for your parted lips to grant her more than what you could give, never begging and never pushing, letting you feel her as deeply as possible, her presence in your mind like a warm bath after a long day, removing your pains and aches as the heat of the water surrounds one’s body. You felt the way you sagged against her touch a little, your hands sliding down to her naked waist as her lips barely separated from yours. Thunder roared all around you but neither of you reacted to the loud rumbling noise, barely audible as your ears filled with the sound of your blood pumping through your veins, throughout your system in rushed beats that fought against your ribcage.

Lilia’s fingers never lifted from your skin, not once, as she unbuttoned your shirt, the cotton fabric opening slowly to reveal miles of creamy skin, her doe eyes raking over your figure as if you were the most exquisite thing in the universe. It still caught you by surprise the way her gaze could be so wild, and unabashed when she observed you while also carrying that veil of love and adoration you thought only you felt for her. It was breathtaking to say the least. Inch by inch a sea of alabaster flesh became exposed to the dark of the night, her hands resting over your hips as she took you in, pulling you closer to her until your chests were barely a few inches from each other. The heat of her body surprised you as it radiated of her and collided with your cooler frame, and for a moment you wondered if she had a fever or if she was going to combust in your hands, flames burning and scorching your hands but even then you would never let go. You would be consumed by fire with her for all eternity if that meant remaining by her side.

Finally, skin came into contact with skin, Lilia’s nipples, stiff and slightly enlarged, brushing against your chest as her hands did quick work of your shirt, pushing it from your shoulders until it rested on top of the mattress, your hands having to let go of her for an instant so you could escape the garment. It was torture to not feel her firmly beneath your palms, her softness the most exquisite caviar in the world, rich like brandy, sweet like wine, and so utterly intoxicating that it left you dizzy when she took the chance and pulled you hard against her, your hands flying around her shoulders to stabilise yourself. A gasp had fallen from your lips, sliding down Lilia’s chest and hiding between her breasts almost as if a string of diamonds had graced her flesh, but you hadn’t realised, lost in the way her heart beat beneath her ribs. You could feel it pounding at a steady rhythm, strong, brave, and powerful and with each beat your anxiety vanished a little bit more, your brain understanding for the first time tonight that she was alive, your mind comprehending at last that it all had been a product of your overtired imagination.

True, it had hurt more than words could ever explain, the sorrow and despair at seeing Lilia in that position while not being able to do a thing to help her, take her pain away and return to how things were before, slicing through your heart over and over, bleeding inside your chest, the tears that had fallen from your eyes bitter and venomous to the point where you had felt your own flesh decaying and rotting in grief, but it had only been in your head. There hadn’t been blood on the bed, nor screams and pleas for help, no death claiming your love and snatching her and your beloved child from your grasp with a cruel, brutal smile. The remnants of your nightmare were nothing more than a memory of feelings and sensations now that Lilia had worked her magic to vanish the images from your mind, but you knew very well that even though it no longer resided in your head, the feelings would still haunt you, driving you into a minor insanity every night if she wasn’t there to calm it all.

With her in your arms, basking in the heat of her flesh and the puffs of breath that ghosted over your neck as her lips kissed the soft skin, your mind became blank, not a thought in sight. Maybe Lilia was aiding you in forgetting, on living the present and letting go of the past, or maybe it was you who preferred to give yourself to the feeling of her, solid and real, beneath your touch, either way you were grateful that the terror was transforming back into a visceral need to become one with Lilia, the feeling of want clawing its way back to your heart. Your fingers twisted her curls lazily, brushing them away from her naked shoulder as her head moved underneath your jaw, your nails leaving angry marks over her perfect skin as a hiss escaped her mouth and collided with the crook of your neck, vibrations travelling down to your bones. That gifted tongue of hers licked the sensitive skin around your pulse point, savouring the slightly spicy tinges that lingered on your body from your gel and lotion, maddening on her taste buds as her craving for you increased exponentially.

The grip you had on her shoulder hardened, nails digging into her skin in an almost in a painful manner, but that didn’t stop her from sucking lightly and drawing out a moan from deep within your chest. Without you even noticing your body pressed harder against hers hoping she would double on her efforts, but it only caused her to stop, her frame shivering as your skin brushed against her breasts, sending a jolt of pleasure and a hint of discomfort down her spine. Her forehead rested against your cheek, pants puffing out of her mouth as she tried her best to control the feelings that overwhelmed and took over her mind for a moment, but you didn’t give her a break. The hands on her waist pushed her away from you until she was sitting in bed staring at you, face flushed, and a questioning look in her beautiful brown eyes. Leaving fiery trails behind your fingers made their way upwards, Lilia’s breath picking up in anticipation until the back of your hand brushed underneath her breasts, her breath hitching in her lungs at the sensation, head lulled back as her fingers wrapped around your wrists to hold herself up. 

She had bewitched you, your mind and body under a spell you would never break, your lower lip between your teeth as you simply watched her. She made no effort to stop you, and as curiosity took over you cupped her bosom in your hands, plump flesh heavy and hot on your palms as they overflowed in between your fingers, clearly too big for your hands. The touch was borderline torture for her but as soon as the pads of your fingertips squeezed gently, aware that they were more sensitive than usual, listening to the way her throat groaned and gasped at the feeling, deep oak orbs hidden behind eyelids as her eyes closed. She could have either cum right there and then from that simple gesture or set herself aflame in a passionate fire, burning from her core all the way to the tip of her toes and top of her head. Her reactions were a little bit stronger than what you were used to hearing from her, after all, you had barely touched her, but the way her lips remained ajar, trying to push air into her lungs as her features contorted in pleasure, you felt your confidence growing and your touch becoming a bit sturdier.

Squeezing a bit harder Lilia’s body vibrated at the guttural moan that echoed against the walls, almost as loud as the rain that still banged against the walls and windows of the house, like daggers that tried to pierce through the glass. She was going mad, feeling every wrinkle of your fingers on her skin like electricity coursing through her veins, sparks practically dripping from your hands onto her breasts, but as much as she was loving this, part of her wanted more and since her fingers were still wrapped around your wrists, she pressed your hands closer, squashing her own bosom with your palms. To see her like that, shivering in pleasure and desire as your thumbs caressed the skin, toying and teasing the plump flesh without fully touching her rock-hard nipples made your need for her greater, and without complaint your lips latched onto her completely exposed neck.

Lilia had no other option but to let go of your arms in this new position she had found herself in, writhing on the mattress as your ministrations reached a new fervor, kneading the flesh tenderly as kiss after kiss you mapped the entirety of her neck, from right under her jaw, teethe scrapping the sharp angle to the hollow of her neck, sucking and licking as if your life depended on it. From her rose-petal lips groans and gasps fell continuously, a moan or two escaping and disturbing the train of sounds when your grip on her breasts became a bit harsher, sending a jolt of discomfort and pleasure in a perfect mix down to her core. Not in a single moment did you lose control of your actions or attempt to take things in a more rough direction, knowing perfectly well that now that she was pregnant and well until she was ready after birth you would not engage in something that could hurt her or the baby, both of them your whole world and priority from now on.

The world could be on fire, buildings collapsing in a thick dust of smoke, rubble covering the roads and pavement, food scarce and danger hiding in every corner, you would never let them get hurt, going without eating for them, without sleep and putting yourself in harms way so they could be safe. You would take all the things Lilia could not do and carry them for her, on your hands, your arms, on your back until your knees hit the floor, all for her and the baby because you could not fandom a world in which you were alive, and they weren’t. Lips journeyed over her collarbone, reaching her right shoulder first where your mouth pecked each freckle you could see and remember, hands pushing her breasts higher, a strangled cry ripped from her throat at the touch of your thumb over her nipple, at last, placing her hands on your hips to steady herself, pants mixing with the constant rhythm on the rain. Lilia didn’t notice the way your entire weight was beginning to push her back onto the bed, her legs still under the covers feeling the heat radiating from your bare thighs as her back arched slowly, but your lips never left her body, kissing your way to her left shoulder, pecking and licking over her collarbones once more and leaving wet spots behind that cooled Lilia’s scorching skin.

It was utterly intoxicating and addicting to touch her like this. Every twitch and movement of her hips drove you to take her, to nearly give in and simply blow her mind but that was not what you wanted. With one last swipe of your thumbs over her nipples you released her breasts gently, a hiss escaping her parted lips as the heaviness of her bosom returned to her, your hands resting on her ribcage, on the sides of her body, to finish pushing her back on top of the mattress. Her perfect curls were spread on her pillow, wild and framing her flushed face while also being fanned over the silky fabric, and as your eyes raked over her body, positively sublime, all you wanted to do was thread your hands through her hair as you to took her to the heavens. Featherlight touches travelled down the sides of her abdomen, fingers leaving a trail of goosebumps behind that had Lilia’s pupils blown wide, no more melted chocolate to bathe your body in, only a pool of lust that had your brain in a haze.

Reaching her hips you were met with obstacles in the form of cotton covers and the rest of Lilia’s pearly nightgown and in a rapid but soft motion the blanket released her shapely legs, calves and sculpted thighs picking from the hem of her gown now that there was no barrier tainted with faded flowers. The bedding clung to her perfume, no matter how many times you washed it her essence lingered, overwhelming your senses and fogging up your mind, though you could not find it in you to protest, loving the way the aroma of your beloved wrapped around you and kissed your skin every night when you closed your eyes and every morning when you opened them. With your hands resting on the arch of her feet fingers rubbed circles on her skin, parting her legs slowly so you could kneel in between them, the bed creaking slightly as the weight shifted and you settled yourself before her.

Inch by inch your touch travelled over her shins, bending her legs as your body bent to place a lingering kiss on top of each of her knees, drinking in the feeling of every muscle you could trace with the tips of your fingers, strong underneath your palms while she also remained soft and tender, her every curve a perfect and delicious sight. Lighting struck once more, sharp, perhaps even brighter than the previous ones, filling up the room with white light, a translucent hue of pink bathing Lilia as if she was glowing, her hands holding onto the sheets underneath her as her chest rose and fell rapidly, anticipation and a touch of desperation lacing her every breath. A groan escaped your throat as she was illuminated in the light of the storm, flesh pink, her body nearly naked before you, her eyes simply devouring you, not blinking afraid that she might miss the way your gaze fell on her body as if she was the oxygen you breathed, the water you drank and the food that you ate, as if she was a glass sculpture that needed to be in case, crafted by angels to be forever beautiful, eternally adored.

Your palms continued on their journey, the path ahead clear, the roads almost free of obstacles as you reached her thighs, taking the time to move your fingers to the soft skin of her inner thigh, basking the way Lilia’s breath caught on her throat, her knuckles nearly white as her grip became stronger, daydreaming of how your fingers would feel on her, hands and lips everywhere. It was only for a moment, to tease her as a smile made its way to your lips for the first time that night and at the sight she just could not stay still, she needed to see it closer, to feel it against her skin to know that you were alright, that you would be perfectly alright as she held you close in her arms. Taking hold of the nightgown that had bunched up around her hips you pushed it down a little, exposing less than an inch of her hipbone, but Lilia understood the signal perfectly and she lifted her ass off the mattress to let you push the garment down her legs and throw it at the foot of the bed.

Another bout of lightning struck the sky, getting closer and closer as the minutes ticked by, but it meant nothing to you, not when Lilia laid completely bare before you, toned legs and dizzying curves leaving you breathless. Perfection seemed too weak of a word to describe her, her soft body complimenting her nurturing and caring nature in a way that you could not quite understand, hands resting on her bare hips as your body hovered over hers, but your grip on her didn’t last more than a few seconds before Lilia was taking your hands and pulling you to meet her face, your smile never faltering, not for an instant. To keep your full bodyweight from pressing against her your elbows rested on either side of her head, fingers playing with random locks of peppery hair as her hands cradled your face, her touch kind and tender on your cheeks, eyes glued to the way your lips stretched in that soft smile that reassured her just as much as it made you come to terms with it all. Nightmares can’t hurt you; they can’t become truths or make you bleed in despair when reality rests beneath your body looking up at your eyes as if you were an extension of herself, completely enamoured by your looks, by your brain and every single bit that made you, you.

She pulled you closer, expecting to feel her lips on yours in an instant but it wasn’t so. Your forehead came to rest over hers in an intimate gesture that you cherished with every fibre of your being, feeling just an ounce of what was going through Lilia’s mind, experiencing what she felt as if you were under her skin, love pouring out of her like a waterfall even if in truth she was barely moving, eyes closed as she breathed in your aroma, engraved deeply in her lungs. All you wanted to do was to stay like this, skin on skin, feeling every inch of her body pressed against yours as if there was no air, no gaps to separate you, the index finger of your right hand tracing the shape of her ear, travelling over her jawline until your palm laid flat on her cheek. If time could stop, if either of you could pause it all, the entire universe, in the blink of an eye, you wouldn’t have hesitated to do so, no rain or thunder compared to the sound of Lilia’s breaths, of feeling her heart beating as if it laid next to yours, her touch tender and kind.

Slowly her head lulled to the side and her lips claimed yours in a kiss that started out as a waltz, sensations controlled, movements delicate against your mouth, but soon it became a tango, passion making its way to her tongue as she traced your lower lips with its tip, begging you to take her, to claim her and who were you to deny her? The heat in the room spiked as tongues battled, your lips parted to grant Lilia entrance, the fire that had burnt steadily in your core now blazing, overtaking your mind for a moment as your hips pressed against hers, feeling just how your actions had affected her. A groan slipped from her mouth to yours, swallowed as thunder crashed almost above your building, loud and cracking, floors shaking as the sound echoed all throughout the city, but your ears could only hear Lilia. Your mouth could only taste Lilia.

As you separated after your lungs began to beg for air, an unnecessary commodity, you thought, claiming her mouth once more not a second later, Lilia whimpering now that your hands had let go of her face and rested on her hips, snaking down to her ass. The way her arms wrapped around your shoulders was instinct, keeping you in place and scratching the back of your neck and scalp with her short nails, red streaks left on your alabaster skin. The ball of her feet rubbed your calves as her legs bent around your hips, tempting you to press yourself harder against her centre, but you refrained, wanting to savour her whole body before you could even entertain the thought of tasting her delicious nectar. Parting from her lips, sweet pants brushing your skin as Lilia breathed in rapidly, your mouth followed an invisible line that started at her left cheek, wishing that gorgeous pink blush could leave an imprint on your swollen lips, marking you with her beauty.

Peck after peck the road led you to her jawline, sharp like a knife, your tongue tasting the thin layer of salty perspiration that was beginning to cover her exquisite skin, sparks of electricity colliding with your tastebuds as the gentle licks became harsh kisses, the first stages of a hickey forming right underneath the juncture of her jaw and her neck. She was delicious, a most sublime mix of sweet and salty that left your brain begging for more, craving her and all the sounds that dripped from her lips, thick and velvety as honey and laced with lust. Moans could not describe the way your lips sucked on her pulse point, not the way your hands squeezed the flesh of her ass, the imprint of your hands red on her creamy skin, but there was just no other sound that could make you understand that all the things you were doing to her, as little or as big as they might be, were maddening. No matter how many times you travelled all over her body, from the wrinkles on her forehead to the smooth flesh of her legs, you just couldn’t get enough, mapping her every curve as rivers of pure passion, every beauty mark as unexplored crossroads, her taunt abdomen a vast plateau of bright green grass that swayed in the breeze with splatters of daisies and lavenders.

Her thighs were canyons with no end, an abyss in between them that you fell in every time, her breasts mountains that you climbed with your bare hands, tasting the springs of crustal clear water that emanated from them as your mouth latched onto the ample flesh. Every time you made love to Lilia, her cartography changed, adding new landmarks you hadn’t seen before, rewriting others to give them the details they deserved, never ceasing your exploration, never faltering in your ministrations. Trailing down her neck, olive-kissed skin exposed for your eyes only, your lips could not help but kiss and taunt the smooth flesh, getting drunk on her state and the sounds of her gasps each time your teeth scraped her collarbone, or your tongue licked the hollow of her neck.

Making your way to her chest, your mouth had barely kissed the sweel of her right breast when her breath caught on her throat, hands digging onto the back of your head, nails nearly drawing blood. In a string of gentle kisses, your mouth traced the invisible outline of the top of each breast, featherlike touches sending shivers all over Lilia’s body, the crackle of magic loud in the air that floated inside the room, almost matching the way the lightning strikes were slicing through clouds and rain continuously now, thunder approaching and crashing onto the ground fast. Her sternum was just as sensitive, moan after moan coating your ears as you worked, your nails scratching the skin of the back of her thighs hard enough to leave red trails behind but gentle enough that you weren’t hurting her, the stinging pain you were causing with your hands mixing perfectly with the pleasure your mouth was giving her. Snaking underneath her bosom you proceeded to deliver a gentle suck, the skin smooth and hot as your tongue licked it, and in return a sharp intake of air followed by a guttural groan escaped Lilia’s body, her frame shaking in anticipation of what was to come, your mouth tasting the smooth flesh around her nipple in painstakingly slow laps of your tongue.

You were sure her nails had dug into your skin, perhaps even drawn a drop or two of blood but that pain was more than welcome by you, her presence and reality confirmed not only by her lingering sweetness on your taste buds, but by her touch of your skin, harsh and yet tender, fingers never faltering as they twirled your hair. Without warning your lips curls around her nipple, sucking gently as your tongue twirled the stiff peak around. A loud cry rained on you, her hand pulling on your hair while at the same time she pushed you closer to her, every nerve ending in her system on fire, melting her and surrendering her completely to your touch, not that she would have denied you her body at any point, her hips buckling against yours in an action-reaction response to the way you were sending sensations all over her body she had never though possible. Her cries only escalated in pitch as one of your hands released her thigh and began to knead on the plump flesh, your mouth never stopping and moving faster and faster to see how much Lilia could take, the feeling of your teeth biting down on her nipple being the limit.

The moan that ripped from her chest held a tinge of hurt and discomfort that you picked up on quickly, and with a tender kiss on the side of it, you moved on to her other breast, her breaths coming in such hurried pants that you wondered for a moment if what you were doing could send her over the edge before you could bury your face in between her legs. You wouldn’t have been wrong. The fire in Lilia’s core was so strong and hot that with each touch, each vibration from your own groans and whimpers her orgasm was being built higher and higher, a skyscraper at this point, and it never slowed down, your mouth delivering each puff of hot breath and each lick of wet saliva as if you had it all calculated. She writhed underneath you, begging with each gasp for you to either take her completely or to send her over the edge already, doubtful of whether she could take much more of you sucking and twirling her nipple in your mouth, each breast as sensitive as every nerve within her. And then you let go.

Her hands fell on top of the mattress as she tried to control her breathing, her mind hazy and her sight blurry even if the room was practically filled with light continuously, thunder rushing all around like a bomb, the bed rattling slightly as you kneeled to observe her. That pearly rose tint her flesh had developed throughout the night had moved on to a bright red, small bruises forming on her neck, and the shape of your fingertips on the plump skin of her bosom from where your hand had kneaded the flesh, taking in the way her legs trembles on each side of your hips, breasts bouncing ridiculously fast, almost as if she was fighting hyperventilating. Every sensation coursed through her veins like the wind in a hurricane, sweeping her off her feet and making her float in a haze of pleasure and desire that hadn’t quite reached its breaking point, not that it was too far away, but as your hands caressed the sides of her ribcage all the way to her hips her heartrate began to drop, beat by beat.

There was no control over the storm outside, rain pouring as if it was the end of the world, fast and angry, drowning the ground and filling the air with the sound of each droplet smashing against walls and windows. But as loud as it was it could never overshadow the way Lilia responded to each of your touches, not even now that your mouth had travelled south down the road of her body, stretch marks greeting you as your kisses lingered on her smooth abdomen, small and curvy, perfect witnesses to the beauty of a woman, the thin lines, lighter in the white halo of the storm, wrapping around her hips and vanishing in the juncture between her pelvis and her upper thighs. There would be more as the child grew and Lilia’s body adapted to house it, skin molding to the baby’s every need, and part of you could not wait to see them as your newborn laid nestled on Lilia’s chest, held protectively by her arms, a sign that she had done and survived one of the most dangerous tasks ever laid before a woman: bringing life.

Thinking of what was to come, of the risks she was taking made your grip on her hips harder, your forehead resting for a moment on her to simply feel her, steady, the flow of her golden tendrils deep inside her caressing your troubled mind into a calm reassuring sea. Under her skin that sparkle of magic always lingered, called out to you to meet it and mix your own young sage power with it, letting Lilia’s wisdom vanish your doubts when you didn’t think you were good enough, to feel her love in everything she did and was, including this sweet kisses that her powers delivered onto your warm skin, like a warm blanket in the dark of a cold winter’s night, like kisses shared on the doorstep of the shop when you bid Lilia goodbye to go to work. All you needed was to be with her, to hold her in your arms, and then nothing in the entire universe could ever go wrong. As you savoured the way her magic cradled you, her hands tenderly pet your head, her fingers threading between locks of your hair as her breaths became slower, you felt something deep within her.

Pressing your lips on her lower abdomen you were surprised to sense that same spark of magic you had both felt earlier that day floating so strongly underneath her skin and muscles. It was like static at first, a tingling that travelled lazily from within her to your lips, but as the seconds went by it grew stronger, moving onto a bright electricity that held you in place, almost as if it didn’t want you to leave. In a haze your mind filled with the sensation of comfort and safety, golden and silver clouds of dust suspended in a vast black universe, all surrounded suddenly by veils of green, like a nebula that was forming inside Lilia, unique and forever eternally levitating under her heart. It was clearly a mix of you both, colours and branches of magic tenderly dancing around each other, but inside that cosmic explosion of life small streaks of white moved in between each of you, a sign that what you were sensing and seeing was your baby, yours and Lilia’s child happily held by the two of you, content to be able to feel you just as much as you could feel them.

You wondered if Lilia could sense it, if perhaps with time she would see the beauty, and if you had lifted your head, even for an instant, you would have seen the way her eyes were closed, sharing that moment with you, stars sparkling, all the futures your baby could have presented to her and yet her mind not wanting to see them. She basked in the way your hands gripped her tighter to you, never wanting to let go, but soon the baby grew tired, too small to remain awake for you to feel, and like a lightbulb it’s light dimed until it laid dormant once again, golden dust cradling white matter as it rested, your own sage particles, wide and full of life, embracing them both, a world of galaxies and stars sparkling before your eyes. Lilia’s body was still affected by your ministrations, but she didn’t push you to meet her needs, cherishing this moment with you even if part of her wanted you to carry on, knowing that you needed this more than she needed to let the coil of pleasure that had built explode and release all the endorphins that had accumulated in your whirlwind of passion.    

Lips met skin, and as you peppered her flesh with kisses, taking in every hum of approval that rumbled in her throat, the corners of her mouth lifting in a kind smile, her hands carried on caressing the back of your head. Slowly you managed to slide lower, her pubic bone and the short grey curls that adorned it brushing and tickling your nose as you planted a kiss over them. Lilia’s breath hitched in her lungs, the calmness that had trickled inside her veins moments ago walking side by side now with the desire you had shared with her, a transfusion of love and pleasure that lazily pumped throughout her system. With your arms underneath her thighs and the palms of your hands pressed against her hip bone your kisses journey to the end of the line, taking the longer route as the smooth skin of her inner thigh laid beneath your kisses, ever so soft, not a blemish or spot in sight, pure as snow and valuable as pearls, platinum melted on your tongue as the storm reached its height, lighting and thunder battling in the sky in an angry tango while Lilia gave her body willingly to you, no questions or expectations ever leaving her lips.

Your teeth didn’t hesitate to leave as many marks as you wanted, ruining her perfect creamy skin with each nibble and bite, sucking hard until a purple tone began to spread instead of the angry red, moans vibrating from her chest; all the bruises and hickeys her oversensitive chest and breasts could not take. Satisfied with the impressionist painting you had created on her, your own rendition of the “Water Lilies” made by Monet, each bruise a flower floating in a perfect sea of calm currents that was Lilia’s sublime flesh, you were finally presented with the most beautiful work of art. Pink folds draped in waves before your eyes, glistening with an arousal that nearly dripped down onto the bedsheets, the salty smell of her filling your lungs and overwhelming your senses, your mouth watering at the sight of her so utterly open and ready for you.

With your thumbs circling the skin between her pelvis and her inner thigh, shivers running up her spine, Lilia could not help the breaths that came in hurried puffs as her heart sped up once more, beating hard against her ribcage to a point that she almost feared she might collapse even before you got started and then, all of a sudden, the universe became to a halt. One long lap of your tongue all along her folds, gathering her sweet juices and drinking them in, had her big brown eyes rolling to the back of her head, the gentle grip she had had on your head now hard as she pulled on your hair, a stinging sensation on your scalp that you didn’t mind. Her lips were ajar, letting the most intense and sinful noises fall past them, dripping almost as loudly as the rain hit the windows. You were gifted, a genius that moved your tongue from side to side, up and down, curling and straightening the muscles all over her, her juices sliding down your chin in transparent rivulets that you didn’t have the chance to gather with your tongue.

Her legs trembled, muscles quivering as she pushed your face closer to her, and who were you to fight it when you wanted to have her on top of you, beneath you, inside you, and at the same time wrapping her every limb around you, to be with her and part of her, one and the same. Flicking her neglected bud in quick succession for a moment had Lilia arching her back and fighting to lift her hips, your hands pressing her back onto the mattress to keep her still, the heels of her feet digging into your lower back as high-pitched moans and grunts accompanied the ever louder thunder, lightning beaming over her sweaty body like a pearly veil that dressed her in transparent silks, skin glowing, hair sprawled over the pillow in matted mess of curls. She moved her head from side to side as your tongue worked wonders on her clit, completely unafraid of being loud and unapologetic of the way you teased and lapped at her, knowing perfectly well what things she liked and what things she didn’t, opting to abuse those spots that drove her insane.

Rain became hail, loud and so very close to shattering glass as it landed harshly over windows, cars battered under its force out on the streets, matching in strength the way Lilia’s arousal was close to reaching its peak, building higher and higher with each stroke. Your right hand released her hip, sliding under her thigh and coming to touch her hot centre with two fingers, coating them in the arousal your mouth could not take, sliding up and down slowly, teasing almost, to make sure that she was more than ready before parting her folds, that smell that was so characteristic of Lilia, sweet and spicy, citrusy even, enfolded in a cloud of rosemary incense seeping from her every pore. The tips of your fingers entered her carefully, eyes watching over her pubic bone as her head was thrown back over the pillow, chest rising and falling rapidly, fighting through the lust and the desire to fill her lungs with air. She felt your fingers filling her up, inch by inch until you were knuckles deep inside her, the coil in her abdomen almost ready to burst, a tingling sensation spreading through her limbs lazily, like a warning of what was to come, and as you began to move them, slowly at first, she could not believe how diligent you were in your ministrations, the care and work you put on making sure she felt good at all times. It almost brought tears to her eyes.

Placing a kiss on her clit your tongue proceeded to return to her folds, fingers picking up their pace, curling slightly until she was nearly screaming, nonsensical noises falling from her parted lips as your ministrations increased. She was so close, you could tell, her arousal dripping all over your hand and chin, velvety walls clenching around you as her legs began to tremble. In a perfect combination of nature and desire you gave one last suck on her clit, grazing the swollen bud with your teeth softly as your fingers went deeper, the tips hitting that spongy spot that released it all. Like a bomb, Lilia arched off the bed, screaming as loudly as the thunder above the shop, lightning eclectically coursing both through the sky and through her every nerve, spreading electricity from the top of her head to the tip of her toes, numbing and at the same time setting every inch of her skin aflame.

Her hips buckled against your hand and face, your tongue lapping and drinking every ounce of her juices that dripped out of her, your fingers never slowing down their pace as she rode out her high, the grip on your hair harsh and strong to the point where you thought she might have pulled a strand or two right out of your scalp. Lilia could not think, could not help but thrush around messing the bedsheets as her orgasm washed over her like ripples on the ocean surface. There was nothing calming about the way the pleasure took hold of her mind, a thick fog clouding her every thought and common sense as starts danced over her eyes, hidden behind closed eyelids. After what seemed to be hours to the both of you, Lilia’s body began to calm down, falling back on top of the mattress, completely spent, as your fingers slowed down to let her adjust to her release. You could have carried on, it would have been easy to bring her to the edge over and over, but this wasn’t a race to see Lilia falling over the edge continuously until she passed out; you weren’t sure why the visceral need to see her come undone beneath you when you could have simply let her hug you and try to fall back asleep, but your mind certainly felt gratitude at seeing her like this before you.

Her breaths came in pants, pushing air in gulps into her lungs as she felt your fingers still their movements at last, the trembling of her legs stopping after a moment, the hand that had been resting and holding her in place over her hip bone now caressing gently the skin of her inner thigh, travelling all the way to her knee and back in a rubbing motion. It was comforting to feel you like that, delivering sweet pecks on the skin of her leg as her body finally came down to the land of the leaving, her hands releasing your hair and flopping back on top of the mattress deliciously spent. As her movements stilled you managed to pull out of her, earning a displeased whine from Lilia that made you smile tenderly as her eyes lazily opened up to see darkness once more, the storm having melted into nothing in the matter of a few minutes, rain falling gently against the house as you moved your body over hers, hovering until your face came to meet hers.

Even though there was no more light in the room she could still make out your relaxed face, the way you held her gaze with a semblance of love that embraced her form as much as your hands caressed her cheeks. There were lingering veils of pleasure over her gorgeous eyes, but if you moved past them, chocolate intoxicating your palate along with the taste of her, the world laid bare before you, the answers to every question you had ever had, presented in Lilia’s hands, waiting for the right moment for her to hand them to you. There was no more fear, no more terror that tried to pull you into an abyss of despair, only the memories of her alive under your touch, responsive even now, her tired arms snaking lazily around your back, as you lips tenderly pressed over hers. She didn’t push her tongue more than was necessary, a quiet moan vibrating from her throat as she tasted herself on your lips, not because she didn’t want to return the favours, but because you made no attempt to continue things.

You hadn’t even realised the way your body had been running partially on adrenaline until you felt a mild ache on your limbs, forcing you to lay on your side beside Lilia, one hand taking hers and intertwining her fingers with yours while the other never left her cheek, her body turning to face you. She could have talked, she could have asked you what had happened, what you needed or if you were alright, but it would have served no purpose. Words were superfluous to either of you right now, unnecessary as shadows hovered and clung to every corner, the early hours of the morning creeping in the horizon, her eyes reading your body language as if you were an open book. A burst of wind could snatch the reassurances that would fall from Lilia’s lips before they reached your ears, leaving you troubled and scared, voices inside your head overshadowing every comforting word until they were barely whispers among your demons. Actions, though, could do what entire books could not.

There was barely a gap between you and her, and never, not even for a moment, did she recoil from you or pull her hands away from yours, feeling the happiness and calmness of your mind. There were no traces of the images that had disturbed you so intensely not that long ago, only the thoughts of her heart beating strong and steady under her ribcage, and her lungs, breathing clouds of warm life that with its tender touches caressed your face, filled you mind with the truths that she was alive under the palms of your hands. Nothing could ever take her from you, and that simple thought would have been more than enough for you, her perfect face holding your loving gaze as the gentle sounds of the rain began to lull you both to sleep, but to have also felt the baby so strongly beneath Lilia's skin, meeting your kisses with sparks, had caught you off guard, not realising how much you loved it already, nearly as much as you loved Lilia. Your legs were interlaced over the blankets, the hand that was neatly held by yours laying close to Lilia’s chest, the steady beating of her heart a melody so sweet to your ears that you could never get tired of hearing it.

Perhaps it was temporary, this happiness that had overcome everything else, but for the time being you were more than content to be able to go to sleep with Lilia in your arms. She pulled you closer to her, the ruffling of the bedsheets filling up the quiet air that floated in the room, and wrapped her arms around your frame as your head nestled on top of her chest, ear glued to her skin in the perfect position to count the way her blood pumped through her veins and each one of her breaths. As the clock on the wall ticked away, Lilia’s perfume filling up your lungs, her fingers caressing the back of your head and the skin between your shoulder blades, the rain became nothing more than a drizzle, silence echoing against the walls after hours of raging sounds, a perfect metaphor for the insanity that had overtaken your mind and the way Lilia had washed it all away. Your eyelids became heavy, the warmth that seeped from her skin enfolding you, and as your body fell into the arms of Morpheus, sleep claiming your tired body once again, Lilia placed a tender kiss on the crown of your head as she wrapped the tousled sheets over the both of you.

It would take her a bit longer before sleep claimed her, the last tinges of pleasure still clinging to her skin, but she did not mind, it hadn’t been the first and it wouldn’t be the last time her slumber run away from her but at least this time she had a good reason to remain awake. Moonlight peaked from in between grey clouds, its silvery beams the first steady source of light the city had seen for hours, breaking through the kitchen window as it brought peace woven in between them, Lilia’s eyes never straying from your relaxed face as the pearly rays kissed your skin, her golden magic keeping you safe and protected. Nothing would ever harm you as long as she was around.

[madamspellmans-met-tet]

🔮 Time After Time 🔮

Lilia Calderu x fem!reader

summary: One night on the Witch's Road, the group shares stories about their "battle scars". You're not keen on your turn.

wc: ~ 2.7 k

tags: hurt/comfort, angst, fluff, mentions self harm & suicide, sfw

A/N: okay so this was actually one of the first fics I wanted to write ever for Lilia x Reader but just never got around to it until a sleepless night yesterday. Even had two requests about Lilia getting a vision of reader attempting and another for sh so this is kinda both. It doesn't go into great detail, but it is explicitly mentioned once or twice, so beware.

TRIGGER WARNING: If you're not in the headspace to consume this kind of content or feel unsafe, please leave this fic and reach out to someone. Reader discretion advised.

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At first glance, night on the Witch's Road seemed no different from an earthly one, but now that you sat with the group around a small, crackling fire, the eerie silence crept into everyone's bones. There was no wind, no insects crawling in the dirt, nothing live dwelling in this place. It was a rotting piece of void that digested every breathing thing within it bite by bite. Nobody said it, but you all felt it; the Road would chew you up if no one stayed up to hold wake.

The group had diverted their fear in idle banter, laughing the night away and sharing stories about the scars marking their bodies. Lilia, seated next to you on the rock you were sharing, pulled her clothes aside to reveal the marks of a vampire bite. "Right before I knocked out his other tooth," she added in that cheeky manner of hers and made you smile.

You could imagine her kicking vampire asses. She may be old, but she was a force to be reckoned with; that much you'd learnt during the short time you'd spent together on the Road. She was the one you stuck with, whose eyes you sought out when danger arose, well, and who you shared a rock with.

There, again!

Lilia did this thing. Checked out mid-sentence or babbled gibberish all of a sudden. Dementia, you'd heard Jen whisper, but she didn't strike you as senile at all. It was more like something ripped the soul out of her body, a displacement. And then she came back, disoriented and rattled.

"Lilia, where do you go?" Jen asked, and Lilia tensed. You gave her hand a subtle squeeze.

Luckily, Agatha's return drew the attention away from Lilia's slip-up and allowed her a moment to collect herself. You didn't notice at first how you hadn't let go of her hand yet and did so with an awkward, apologetic smile. Upon Jen's prompt, Agatha recounted the time a knitting needle had pierced her elbow.

"I've got a scar," Rio took over then, but Agatha was even quicker to say, "No, you don't."

You'd gathered during the last trial that the two somehow knew each other, but the interaction was still odd. Rio told her story anyway, which seemed to upset Agatha, and she left. When Rio followed her, Lilia gripped her wrist and gave her a warning. "Don't think for a second I've forgotten what you said in the sound booth."

Rio hissed at Lilia. You didn't like that she did. It wasn't the first time this happened, and sometimes you wanted to hiss back, but something told you not to mess with her. Before silence could overtake the round, Jen presented a scar around her ankle from a shackle to you and went on to lecture about what potions she used to minimise it and with what tincture she hoped to make it disappear entirely.

"It might work as a wrinkle cream too," she said to Lilia. "I'll let you know when I've perfected the recipe."

"How thoughtful," Lilia muttered under her breath and tossed a twig into the fire. You could've sworn you heard her add the word 'bitch'.

"What about you?" Alice asked, and it took a second before you realised she was talking to you.

"Yeah, show us your trophies," Jen agreed, gesturing in your direction.

You pulled your sleeves almost to your fingertips and turned away, shuddering under all their eyes on you. Jen crossed her arms and made a noise of disapproval. "Hey, this is a group activity. We have to rely on each other to survive out here. Do your part."

Lilia snapped around. "Watch your tongue."

"She's not wrong, though," Alice said, offering a warm smile instead. She'd only just shared one of her most vulnerable experiences with you; it would be unfair to withhold, but it was too risky. You shook your head and curled your fingers around your sleeves.

"Honey, you don't have to. Don't listen to them."

-> continue

*******************************************************

please leave a comment here or on Ao3, thank you <3

[vintagegirl01]

Fortelling Events

Steven Grant x divination witch female reader (Implied moon boys x fem! reader)

A/N: Please do NOT read if you have not watched episode 7 of Agatha All Along. Major Spoilers AHEAD. Happy Early Halloween 🎃! Hope you all enjoy this fic.

Summary: When you learn about the death of your divination mentor, Lilia Calderu, you are at loss. Nevertheless, your sweet boyfriend is there to comfort you through it.

____________________________________________

For the last few days, you have had a bad feeling that something was going to happen. As a divination witch, you’ve always had that gift to be able to see beyond but have only used if and when absolutely necessary. Though another part of it had to do with the fact that having the abilities that you had made you different from everyone else.

All that changed when you sought out the help of Lilia Calderu a few years back. Despite being reluctant at first, she took you under her wing and helped you learn more about divination. Because of her, you found friendship. In fact, she was the one that told you about the love that you’d eventually find with the boys. Though at the time you didn’t believe her when she mentioned the loves of your live. Loves being more than one. In fact, you were for sure you misheard her until she begin mentioning more details here and there as you continued training with her. It would only be a few more months when she made her last prediction about your love life that you met the boys.

However, it was Steven you met first when you were at a bookstore looking for a particular book about unusual herbal teas. After that, it was only a matter of time that you met Marc and Jake did you realize that you realized that Lilia’s words were true.

____________________________________________

You see Lilia Calderu in a Glinda the good witch costume with what you assume to be other witches, 2 women and a teen boy, surrounding her in costumes from various media .

The next thing you see is a Lilia talking to these individuals separately before telling the woman named Jennifer that she loved being a witch and shutting the doors.

Not completely understanding the situation, you know enough to know that the phrase seemed like a goodbye.

You then see seven dark figures begin to enter the room waiting to attack Lilia. As they began to move, Lilia grabbed the reversed Tower tarot card from the trial and flipped it right side up, causing the trial room to invert. Lilia and the Salem Seven plummeted into the swords on the ceiling.

After seeing those seven dark figures fall, you see Lilia seems content before letting go of the table and falling.

Not wanting to believe this is the end, you try to call out to her in hopes that she can hear you or maybe prove to yourself that this is only a figment of your imagination and that the older women is actually okay. You then hear her own voice tell you that everything will be okay. That this is how things are supposed to be, before mentioning how you will do great things.

“Lilia! Lilia! NO!!!!”

You then are awoken to Steven’s worried face. Feeling your face, you feel the tears rolling down your cheeks as well as the perspiration on your face.

“Love, are you alright? You were practically screaming bloody murder?”

“I…I…I’m fine.”

You then get up from the bed and head to the bathroom before sinking to the floor and crying for the mentor and friend that you lost. The one who you felt understood you for being what you are.

A witch with no coven.

____________________________________________

These past few days, Steven had noticed that you hadn’t really been yourself. Though you tried to convince him otherwise, he and you had been dating long enough to know that this wasn’t your normal behavior. Nevertheless, he gave you space and kept reminding you to that he was there for you whenever you needed him.

Yet, hearing you scream in your sleep just a few moments ago told him that this problem wasn’t something minor.

After talking it out with his head mates, Marc and Jake, Steven decides to go talk to you. Knocking on the bathroom door, he begins to speak from his heart.

“Love? I don’t know what’s going on right now but whatever it is, I want to be there. Right next to you.”

Expecting for you to put up more of a fight, Steven is shocked to see you open the bathroom door. A second later, you are hugging him, breaking down as you tell him about the loss of your mentor, friend, and sister of the craft.

“…I could have done something to help her. Let her know of the visions I was having. Perhaps it would have been enough to save her.” You begin to sigh, as you wipe your tears. “For the longest time, I never thought I’d find someone that understood what I went through regarding my powers. At a young age, people thought me strange for knowing things. Now that she’s gone, I’m a witch with no coven.”

Steven shakes his head. “That’s not true, love. Though I may not be a witch or warlock, you and I are a team.” He smiles before bringing you into a side hug. “Marc and Jake said the same too. So now you officially have a coven, my love.”

You look up at him smiling. “Thank you, Steven. All three of you.”

“No problem, love”, Steven responds back. “Now, just know that I will be here to help you deal with this loss. As I said before, I’m a part of your coven. We all are.”

You lean into kiss Steven. For you are truly grateful for having him in your life as Lilia had once foretold.

As you pull back, you nuzzle into your boyfriend’s side as you think about the eccentric yet kind older woman who helped you all those years ago lead the life you currently live as a confident and capable witch.

It’s another few minutes before you and Steven get up from the bathroom floor and heading to your shared bedroom for the night.

Though it will take time to come to terms with her death, you are so glad to have a coven and family within the loves of your love.

[ragnarockz]

Going to be really boring with the ask but: Agatha Harkness for:

5: What kind of tea do they like?

20: What would their favorite book series be?

And then Lilia calderu

12: How many piercings do they have, which ones, and how often do they wear them?

13: Would they let a small child paint their nails?

14: Are they a good babysitter?

and Jennifer Kale:

17: Math Gay, English Gay, or both?

THESE ARE SO GOOD I'M SO EXCITED!

Agatha:

5. What kind of tea do they like?

omg listen...I hear/read/see the word 'tea' and my brain goes ballistic. I LOVE tea; I have a tattoo of a TEA KETTLE. But aside from all that, I think she's definitely a herbal tea drinker. I mean, she probably had to make a lot of tea and know what plants were safe to ingest when she was living out in the woods with Nick and I think that stuck with her throughout time. Lots of good remedies/health benefits come from it and I think that's also something very magical (and hey yeah, plants can improve your health and well shit, RIO OUT HERE MAKING THOSE PLANTS!) That's a win/win situation right there.

(back to edit - making tea in Wandavision 🥰)

20. What would their favorite book series be?

Ok so we all know she's a voracious reader I mean, the girl was trying to steal a (spell) BOOK. And, we had Detective Agnes go into an ACTUAL library to do her investigation and not use the (especially in this day and age) libraries website to find the book she was looking for. ALSO, HER HOUSE?

Brb breaking in to steal all her books. As for a book series though, it's probably something old, maybe even a history series or mythology. She definitely feels like someone who knows her history (to use it as she will in the worst ways possible). Knowledge is power and knowledge is sexy.

(coming back to edit this post because I couldn't find the pic this morning but yeah! Agnes visiting the library! Just like me for real, I have two books due soon 😅)

Lilia:

12. How many piercings do they have, which ones, and how often do they wear them?

I think she would just have her lobes, very European (especially Italian), to have your ears pierced at a very young age. And she would wear them all the time!

13. Would they let a small child paint their nails?

Oh for sure! 🥺 I think she would be wonderful around kids, especially younger ones. She brings such warm vibes and I think just her having some love and attention put onto her warms her heart.

14. Are they a good babysitter?

I would think so! Just...just don't feed any of those kids anything expired ma'am...please..

Jennifer:

17. Math Gay, English Gay, or both?

Oh she is very, very smart. Look how far that woman has come even BOUND. She has her own business! She was a midwife! A root worker! She had to know how to read and apply maths and sciences to her practices.

[aggieharkness]

Hello! Baking (or rather cutting out) Christmas cookies was a bit like a cold, tense hell with Christmas music playing in the background.

So I'd like to request reader baking Christmas cookies (or just normal cookies) with Lilia. Put as much fluffy, funny, feel-good feelings as you can in there, please. I'd really appreciate it.

Happy holidays!

The world is perfect when I'm with you

Pairing: Lilia Calderu x reader

Summary: It's Christmas Eve and you and Lilia share a few quiet moments at home baking cookies and simply enjoying the time to be with each other.

Warnings: romance, pure fluff, dancing, baking cookies.

Authors note: Oh my God, I love the idea. You don't know just how happy it made me to read this, like I was bouncing on my bed. I hope you like it and that it brings you happiness and comfort. If there is anything at all that you don't like, tell me and I'll change it, or if you want more, I'm here. Thanks for the request. btw.

This is a Christmas gift for you!! Happy Holidays!

The world is perfect when I'm with you

The house was filled with music. Christmas carol after Christmas carol played through the Bluetooth speaker you had bought a few months ago, echoing against the walls of Lilia’s tiny living area. She wasn’t one for festivities such as Halloween or Easter, but God, she adored Christmas. The first year you had shared the holidays with her it had surprised you just how invested she was, putting up an old beat-up tree, fairy lights everywhere, even around the bedposts, but you never complained. Her big brown doe eyes had shone with such joy and happiness that you just couldn’t bring yourself to burst her bubble in any way. The house had looked beautiful once she had finished, a small nativity scene in a corner of the room, a remnant of her past life in Sicily. This year wasn’t any different, and you wouldn’t have it any other way. The first of December hit the calendar, and she was like Sonic the Hedgehog pulling out boxes of lights and ornaments, leaving the tree to you, a brand new one covered in fake snow that you had gifted her a couple of years ago. She loved knowing that you were helping and making sure the house was just like she wanted it to look, little angels and random glass balls hanging from the branches, golden tinsel wrapped around it along with a string of lights. It looked beautiful next to the TV. For three weeks you helped her set up the house until you were finally able to take your vacation days, leaving your job until the sixth of January.

Morning had come, bursting through the windows in gentle warm rays of sunlight that bathed over Lilia’s form as she slept, those lovely peppery curls shinning under the orange beams, her body cuddled against yours. Every morning since you both had closed up the shop for the holidays had been exactly the same sweet routine; you waking up first to meet the dawn while she slept for a bit longer, basking in the way your hands followed the shape of her soft ringlets, and your tender kisses lulled her away from the land of dreams. It was simply the best way to begin the day. You both had stayed in bed talking about nothing and everything cuddled against each other until the sun was well high up in the sky, the pinks and purple hues that had painted the world above now a clear blue cyan while the world was buried underneath a crisp layer of snow that had fallen through the night. You had not noticed, wrapped around Lilia, lost in her kisses. She got up first, her hair falling from the bun she had had when you had taken her to bed, her ivory gown letting you catch a glimpse of her otherworld body as she made her way to the bathroom, the light hitting her just at the right angle making her nightdress completely see through. She looked bloody fantastic for being over a hundred and fifty years. The rest of the routine followed like clockwork, coffees and scrambled eggs included, making way for the moment you were both in right now.

Lilia’s body swayed from side to side to Michael Bublé, a Christmas classic for her, her voice not only harmonising perfectly, but overtaking and overpowering the music so easily and effortlessly that you had to stop pulling bowls out of cupboards simply to watch her. Over the kitchen counter she was beating three eggs along with melted butter and sugar, ingredients spread everywhere because when she had got up, right before she had left for the bathroom, she had bent over your body, your eyes drifting to her cleavage until her eyes had claimed your attention, telling you that you were making cookies today. Had you been Agatha or maybe even Jen you would have complained telling her that it was boring, but you were you and the prospect of baking with Lilia was like a perfect Christmas gift.

-Lils, how much flour do we need? – your eyes lifted from the big packet of flour that you had just left on the table, her usual red and blue robe flowing when she moved to stand beside you, a yellow apron with the words “Look at these buns!” protecting her clothes.

-280 grams baby, or one full cup. It’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas.

-Everywhere you go. Thanks, hon.  

-Take a look at the five and ten.

-It's glistening once again.

-With candy canes and silver lanes that glow.

It was wonderful to sing with her even if your voice could never compare; she did not care. Anything that she did with you was simply perfect. Her hands left the bowl of wet ingredients on the table, holding onto yours before you could grab the sifter. She pulled you away from the table, moving your arms from side to side rather dumbly, twirling you on the spot before your chest was pressed against hers. The music was forgotten in the background, drowned by both yours and Lilia’s laughter as your bodies bent exaggeratedly from right to left. Christmas suited her, it was as if this holiday had been made for her, the lights that she had placed all around the room blinking on and off within a pattern, the bright colours mixing with the warm light bursting through the windows. Lilia twirled the both of you around the kitchen table until the song ended, “Feliz Navidad” now playing instead. Her lips landed briefly over yours, pecking you sweetly before she put you back to work with the dry ingredients.

-Don’t forget the baking soda. Last time you did, the cookies became a rock-hard mass.

-Hey! How was I supposed to know that the baking soda wasn’t in the baking soda bottle but in the saffron one? You are the one who loves to recycle.

-Why would I want to throw away a perfectly usable jar? Besides it’s not my fault you forget your glasses in the bathroom all the time.

-Oh yeah? – you grabbed the top of her apron and pushed her against you. – Where are yours now babe?

-You little…

-Ah! No cursing, you don’t want the dough to get upset and not rise, do you?

-I don’t know why you listen to Rio, that it’s obviously a myth.

-Do you want to risk it? – she shook her head, her pout transforming into a bright smile before she kissed you once again, humming happily against your lips.

There were still a few deep tones of the black coffee she had had for breakfast on her lips that your tongue picked up and savoured before turning back to your bowl. Sifting the flour so there would be no lumps you followed the powder with your eyes carefully, making sure every single drop was inside the bowl this time. Over a week ago you had been supposed to bake an apple pie for Sharon’s book club but there had been a few minor hiccups, one of them being you sifting the flour all over the table because you had been looking at Lilia while she talked about a client that had come in requesting the lottery number. When she turned around, she saw you covered in the white powder, bursting into unladylike snorts of laughter that had her entire face turning red, needing to sit for a moment to fill her lungs and calm herself down. Through the corner of her eye she watched you fill the bowl and congratulated you on not spilling it, a kiss on your temple, her hands busy slicing a couple of chocolate bars. She was teasing a bit, but every praise was always genuine when they came from her, a bubble of happiness wrapping around your heart. A pinch of salt and the baking soda and the dry ingredients were ready for the rest of the mix, Lilia wiping her hands on a tea towel before beginning to pour the eggs, sugar and melted butter mix. Instead of using a whisk you had grabbed a spatula from the sink, washing it before beginning to gently fold the batter until it was smooth but thick.

-Can you turn the oven on? I’m almost done with the chocolate.

-Can’t we just bake them with, you know… a flick of our wrist?

-I swear, Halloween Town has made so much damage. Being able to do something doesn’t mean we should, and you have never seen me turn chicken thighs back into a chicken, have you?

-No, but can we?

You knelt on the floor removing trays and plastic Tupperwares so they wouldn’t melt, turning knobs until the light came on and the fan began to work. You were thankful for all those squat trainings you did as you lifted the ceramic trays you had removed from inside the oven and placed them over the bed covers noticing that Lilia had not answer the question. When you turned around she was biting into a perfectly backed chocolate chip cookie, an eyebrow raised and a smirk on her lips.

-Why didn’t you tell me we actually could Lilia?!

-Because half of the fun is letting the smell of fresh baked cookies fill the house.

She stretched her hand, the half-eaten cookie waiting for you. You rushed back to her and took one big bite, moaning at the taste of the chocolate and vanilla essence, Lilia popping the rest in her mouth, pecking your lips after a moment. Even though she could clearly bake at the snap of her fingers she still moved to put parchment over a metal tray, grabbing a scoop from a drawer. She had already mixed the chocolate into the batter, the dough cold to the touch when you went to pick up some with your finger. So, she could chill it in a second instead of putting it in the fridge, but she did not want to bake them with her magic? A waste of time in your opinion, but then again, she might be right, as usual. The house did smell delicious for days after baking. Lilia had placed a bottle of olive oil on the table so you could lather your hands in it, the first scoop of batter landing in your palms so you could round them before placing them on the parchment paper, over two inches in between each cookie so they could rise and expand in the over without ending up as one giant monstrous thing. It had happened before. The first batch of eight cookies was done in just a few minutes, but there was still a bit of batter left, not that Lilia hadn’t thought of a solution already, another tray waiting for what was left. Just as you finished rounding the last one the oven begun to beep, and Lilia bent to put the trays inside, setting a timer for around fifteen minutes.

-Now for the sugar cookies. I’ll get the ingredients ready while you clean up the table, okay baby?

-Sure, just let me move this flour bag to the counter first.

Innocently you picked up the heavy bag, waddling slightly towards where Lilia had cleared a spot for it on the counter, feeling it slipping a bit off your hands, your steps faster so it wouldn’t end up on the floor. In slow motion you let it plop on the counter, just in time, your fingers barely holding onto it, but the motion had caused a white cloud of flour to come out of the bag right towards Lilia’s spot. Your hands shot to cover your mouth, eyes wide, when you turned to look at her, fighting the laughter that wanted to erupt out of your mouth. Lilia’s beautiful face with her rosy cheeks, big characteristic nose and plump lips was utterly covered in a thick layer of white. She blinked a few times, flour falling off her eyelashes giving her an even more comical look with her chocolate doe eyes staring at you through the white mask. Some of it had made its way to her hair, mixing perfectly with her curls. She opened her mouth to speak but she coughed instead, a small cloud of flour puffing in front of her right before sneezing, part of the powder falling onto the top of her dress and over her yellow apron. There was silence for a moment, not even YouTube Music was playing as she stared at you, hands on her hips. An instant later “Let it snow! Let it Snow! Let it Snow!” was filling up the room with its jolly tune, your laughter impossible to keep quiet.

You roared loudly, a hand still trying to cover your mouth while the other was holding onto your stomach, eyes moving from her face down to the floor. Lilia was staring dumbfounded at you, an offended look on her face as you laughed. Her hand shot to grab your arm pulling you towards her, eyes watering when you rose up to gaze at her. She stopped your laughter quickly, her hand throwing a handful of flour to your face, making you blink away the flour surprised at her action. Staring at each other there was no sound coming from either of you before Lilia chuckled, you following until you were both laughing, your hand grabbing more flour and throwing it in her direction, Lilia dodging it just in time. When you saw that she was putting her hand in the bag you rushed away from her giggling excitedly, feeling her behind you as you rounded the table, her flour missing you by an inch. She was now actively chasing you all throughout the house, your body sliding through the curtains and into the store. You were both leaving a trail of flour on the floor, but neither of you cared.

-I’ll get you for this!

-I’m sorry! I didn’t… - you could hardly breath from how much you were laughing, screaming in delight whenever she got close enough to grab you but never actually doing it. - I didn’t mean it!

-Come here!

You rushed to the door, pulling the glass gates open and stepping into the empty street. Sure, you were not wearing clothes appropriate for snow, your feet cozy inside your slippers, legs dressed in a pair of black leggings, but you hadn’t thought of that. Moving over two feet away from the house, Lilia following you out into the street, you took one step until you felt her hands grabbing onto your waist, pulling you against her. You yelped gleefully while laughing, feeling her arms snake around you, the perfect crispy snow reaching your mid-calf, the air cold, a contrast against Lilia’s delicious warm body.

-Got you. – she whispered in your ear, her breaths rapid and hot against the skin of your neck. You smiled while resting your head in the crook of her neck, very little flour left on your faces now.

-So you did.

-If it was all a ploy so we could come out and play in the snow you know you could have just told me.

-Hmmm, not a bad idea, but it was an accident.

-I know, baby. I’m not mad, but you are cleaning up when we are done baking.

Your mouth was open in shock, a retort forming in your tongue as you turned your face to look at her, but it never made it out of your mouth, her lips on yours kissing you tenderly, her soft ringlets caressing your cheeks. The chocolate cookie had left a wonderful sweet taste on her lips, or perhaps it was the bite you had had, either way, it seemed to fit her perfectly. You both stood over the snow for a few minutes observing the usual boring street covered in glistening white all over, on the roof tops, over the signposts. It was beautiful as long as you had Lilia behind you pecking your cheek. She turned you around after a while, holding onto your hands, pulling your frame back inside the cozy home. The oven had just begun to beep when you crossed the curtain to the back, Lilia rushing to them so they wouldn’t burn letting go of you. She was beautiful, spots of flour still clinging to her skin, like on her forehead or the tip of her nose, but they didn’t seem to bother her as she placed one tray on the stove and the other on the counter over a plate so it wouldn’t leave a burn mark on the old wood. You could spend every minute of your life watching her do anything.

They smelled absolutely delicious, the aroma spreading through the room to every corner, gently sliding into the shop. Over the bed covers you had left a rack which she picked up and left on the counter, you watching from your spot against the back wall as Lilia worked flawlessly, transferring the cookies along with the parchment paper to let them cool down. There was no room for the hot trays now, but that was no issue. Lilia turned, locking her eyes with you and then winked, lazy tendrils of yellow magic wrapping themselves around the trays and lifting them in the air, floating with gentle swaying motions over your heads. Everything related to Lilia’s magic was always so very mystical, visions, readings, the usual divination magic that she was used to, so it was wonderful to see the more practical, fun side of it, it meant she was relaxed and happy. She moved her hand beckoning you to join her, pulling out a pair of clean bowls after she had left the dirty ones in the sink.

-Why don’t you start with the icing?

-What happened with cleaning up the table?

-Flour on my face happened, doll. But don’t worry, there’s not much on the table now, I’ll just move those cups to the side if I need to.

-You don’t trust me anymore? – you pouted with a fake saddened tone as she took a stick of butter and a few eggs out of the fridge, turning her body towards you, a hand on the counter and the other on her hip, head lulled to the side. She sighed but smiled, your pouting making you look just so adorable.

-You know I do, otherwise I wouldn’t have given you the fun part of the recipe. You get to paint the cookies, baby.

-Yeah, but it’s fun doing things together. I want you to paint with me.

-Who said I wasn’t going to? You just make the icing and leave it on the side while I start on the batter and then we can cut them together. Does my baby like that?

Nodding your head she moved her hands to your cheeks kissing your lips tenderly, a smile on her lips when she parted from you. Happy that you had got, yet again, another kiss you took a small bowl from the cupboard above your head, checking the recipe that was stuck to the exhaust hood above the stove with a magnet before picking up two eggs, separating the yolks from the whites. Lilia kindly took the yolks and put them aside to use them at lunch time while you beat the whites with the whisk a bit. You didn’t need to do it, you just liked to before putting the icing sugar in, which you could not find in any of the cupboards. You pulled doors open, drawers, you even searched the fridge, it wouldn’t have been the first time any of you had accidentally put something in that didn’t belong there, but it was nowhere, and you could have sworn you had bought some not long ago. Lilia saw you moving frantically all over the kitchen and asked loudly what you needed over the music of “Jingle Bells Rocks” that was now playing. Upon hearing what you needed she moved aside to present you with a bright orange bottle.

Of course, she must have picked it and put aside when she had begun to gather ingredients. She was measuring the sugar, your eyes watching how her hands, dressed in rings on multiple fingers, tapped the bag and moved to the beath of the song. With a small cloud of floating icing sugar you mixed it all, a white paste forming in the bowl to which you added a little bit of corn syrup to make it glossier, just a touch that you liked. Now came the fun bit, taking the food colouring and crating the weirdest shades you could come up with. With a spoon you poured some of the mixture into an empty glass, adding a drop of red that turned pink upon mixing it with a teaspoon, so you added a few more, happy with the bright red that you made and setting it aside. Lilia looked at your science experiment from the corner of her eyes, hands adding spoonfuls of flour into the wet ingredients, folding the powder in. You were like a little kid with a bunch of sharpies and crayons painting lines and figures excited to see the final outcome, Lilia’s brown eyes looking at you as you mixed red and blue to create purple, although right now it looked a bit more like a suspicious brown. She let you finish mixing the colours, reminding you to leave part of the icing white, before adding the last few touches of a pinch of salt and baking powder, the dough clumpy in the bowl, as it should be.

 -Are you done with the arts and crafts, babe?

-Yeah, I think. How do you make grey?

-You don’t. I didn’t get any black colouring. Why would you want to add grey to Christmas cookies?

-Well, I don’t have an idea right now, but I like to have a range.

-Come on, Van Gogh, let’s roll the dough.

While you closed the last bottle of colouring Lilia placed the dough on the table, her strong arms and hands kneading and rolling to combine it and let it form a big smooth ball. You were mesmerised by the way her muscles moved up and down even through the lose sleeves of her dressing gown, her chest bouncing gently to the motion, your eyes glued to soft flesh of her neck and collarbones through the low-cut dress she was wearing, her amulet swaying along. It was incident to stare like that, but she was just too captivating, and she knew. She could feel your eyes watching her every move, a shiver running down her spine, but she never stopped kneading, there would plenty of time for her to take you to bed later. She gave it a few more punches before patting the little ball of dough, signalling that she was done.

-Should I get the rolling pin?

-Yeah, this is ready. It’s in the second drawer, next to the bottle opener.

-It’s too early for a glass wine, right?

-Yes, darling. It’s my company so bad that you need to get drunk at 10 am? – she raised an eyebrow while looking at you, a hand on her hip over her apron. Only a couple of feet separated you, but it was too much of a gap for you, snaking your arms around her neck while her hands automatically moved to your waist, her lips ghosting over yours.

-Never. You are far too alluring and beautiful, I would hate to get drunk and forget tomorrow how you looked today, or how your perfume compliments the smell of cookies so well.

A childish giggle escaped her mouth, muffled when she bent to peck your lips. She was clingy today, or amorous, either way you were not complaining. Parting from you she patted your hip, a sign that she needed you to get her the rolling pin, which of course you did. Anything she needed. There was a certain level of excitement building in your chest as Lilia rolled the dough until it was a quarter inch thick, the sheet overtaking half of the kitchen table, the best part coming at last.

-Right, where are the cookie cutters, babe?

-They should be in a box in the cupboard over the sink. Let me check. – pulling a chair from under the table you stepped on it to check in between the toaster and a juicer that you had got her for her birthday, date that she still refused to tell the girls in the coven, Sharon included as she could be a bit of babble when she had a glass or two of wine in her system. You searched but the box was nowhere to be found. – I can’t find them, did you move them, hon?

-No, not that I remember. Have you looked behind the coffee bags?

-Yeah, they’re not there. Where… Ah… I know where they are.

-Where? I’ll get them while you come down.

-Does the car have gas? – she was resting her backside against the edge of the desk as you stepped down, returning the chair underneath the table.

-What? What does the car have to do with anything?

-I lent them to Agatha.

-What? Why?

-I don’t know, I stopped asking her what she needs things for. I’m not getting another story of her and Rio’s sexual exploits during an expo or whatever. She just asked for them, so I lent them to her.

-You mean gave them to her. We are going to have to buy new ones. Well, it’s not too much of a loss, just grab a couple of knifes and we’ll freehand the cookies.

You practically hopped your way to the upper drawer to pick a pair, rushing back to her side and handing her one. You stared at the dough as if calculating, figuring out exactly what you wanted to do and after a moment, you began to create what you were sure was a candy cane, super proud of the shape until you looked at Lilia, who had had the same idea, and noticed how your lines were hardly straight and the curve was more a 90º angle.

-Why does yours look like an actual candy cane?

-Practice. Oh, yours is not that bad, baby. What is it?

-Ha ha. You know very well what it is.

-Yes, sorry, just teasing.

It was now a competition for you, eyes squinted and your teeth biting down on the tip of your tongue as you tried to keep the knife straight through every line, connecting them all and creating a star, or what you thought should be one, because it looked more as if it had just been run over by a car. Lilia laughed when she saw it and in a childish move you planted your index finger right on her Christmas tree, squishing it while sticking your tongue out. She gasped while calling your name.

-Y/N!

-You laughed at my star!

-It doesn’t look like one, baby.

-And now your tree doesn’t look like a tree, so we are even.

-Darling, it doesn’t matter if they are not perfect, we know what they are supposed to be and that’s all that matters. So what if your star needs a bit of therapy? Now my tree needs a chiropractor. Let’s continue, alright?

-Just don’t laugh again.

-I promise, scouts honour.

She pecked your lips and forehead before tuning back to the dough. The next form was supposed to be a snowman, but it looked more like a bunch of amorphous meatballs, a giggle sliding through your lips at the sight. You turned to check Lilia’s attempt at a reindeer which was more along the lines of a corgi with horns. You could not help it, it brought a cackle out of you, her peppery curls bouncing around her face as she wiped her head to look at you.

-I didn’t laugh at yours!

-Yeah, but… what the hell is that Lils?

-It’s a… It was supposed to be a reindeer.

-I’m sorry honey, but it looks nothing like one.

-Well, it’s a new breed. From Canada.

-Shall we name it? – your hand went to her shoulder, your head resting over it as you both watched the figure.

-Agatha, for stealing our cookie cutters.

She laughed at her own joke, your own snorting only adding to the humour of the moment, without a care in the world. Both of you carried on making shapes and forms, some of them better than others, some being additions to the “new breed from Canada”. You had pointed at each other’s creations laughing and praising, giving some of them names until you had the entire coven in cookie form, but you and Lilia’s figures could not be those weird interpretations of snowmens and trees, so you let her carve yourselves as two beautiful gingerbread women. It had started out as Christmas cookies but in the end, when Lilia had begun to move them to the floating trays, there had been more amorphous beings than accurate forms, but neither of you cared one bit, “Fairytale of New York” following “Santa Baby” on your Christmas playlist. Lilia’s head perked up at the sound of the music, pushing the door to the oven with her hip until it closed, setting a timer for ten minutes. She grabbed your hand, intertwining her fingers with yours as she pressed you against her, swaying to the song.

She must have been a singer and a dancer at some point in her life, there was just no way she could be that good and not have had shown her gift to the world at least once. You would ask her one of these days, but as of now you were happy to dance with her in the kitchen, listening to her sweet voice follow the tune. The moment was perfect, down to the song, to the way the sun caught in her hair as she twirled you both around the room, her citrusy perfume filling up your lungs along with the sweetness of the cookies. How could you have ever been blue? How could you have ever thought that happiness was not in for you? Lilia had come into your life and the world was suddenly a beautiful place where nothing could ever go wrong. Staring at her eyes it was as if they were the melted chocolate you had tasted on her lips earlier, warm and loving.

-They've got cars big as bars, they've got rivers of gold.

-But the wind goes right through you, it's no place for the old.

-When you first took my hand on a cold Christmas Eve.

-You promised me Broadway was waiting for me.

-You were handsome

-You were pretty, Queen of New York City

She laughed at the nickname, head lulled back, her feet never stopping, moving from side to side. The living area wasn’t precisely Buckingham Place, but you two made it work, and as Lilia’s moved both your bodies, her dressing gown brushing the foot of the Christmas tree, she truly showed you how much that tiny little room could give. The warm light that had bathed the room suddenly disappeared, the bright colourful lights that she had placed in every corner overtaking and lighting up the room in a dance of colours and shapes. Your eyes drifted to the window seeing the sky covered by big fluffy white clouds, a gentle breeze having picked up outside the house, the first few snowflakes beginning to fall, but Lilia claimed your attention when she pushed your body away form hers while still holding your hands.

-The boys of the NYPD choir were singing Galway Bay and the bells were ringing out for Christmas day.

She pulled you back against her body once again, her arms around your waist, your hands resting on the back of her neck twirling her soft curls in between your fingers. Her forehead was pressed against yours, the movements slow as the song carried onto the last few verses letting the words drip from her lips in hushed tones only for you to hear. The two of you had closed your eyes letting the warmth of each other’s bodies wrap around you, basking in the way you could feel the love seeping from every pore, from every word that escaped her lips. It wasn’t until she sang the last verse, her breath tickling your nose, that she did press her lips to yours, hiding her face into the crook of your neck after a few moments to escape the reality outside those four walls. “Auld Lang Syne” followed, the softer tune perfect for you both to simply sway on the spot, your hands caressing Lilia’s hair and neck, your cheek resting against her ear as she breathed in your perfume and shampoo, humming happily. Neither of you wanted the moment to end, feeling as if being like this, in each other’s arms, was just the perfect way to live Christmas Eve before the craziness of going over to Sharon’s with the rest of the coven happened. You wanted to savour every second you had with Lilia and only Lilia. For once the world could wait, stop moving altogether until you were ready to carry on with life, though you doubted you would ever let the happen.

Right on time the last few notes playing marked start of another song, the oven starting to beep. Lilia did not wish to move, but she had to, extracting herself after a minute to pull the trays out, letting them float around just like she had done before. You helped her transfer the chocolate chip cookies onto a plate, setting them aside so she could let the sugar cookies out of the trays and onto the racks. But you were impatient, she knew, and with a flick of her wrist, your eyes shinning gleefully as you watched a few sparkles of golden magic fly from her fingertips, they were cold enough to be placed on the kitchen table to be decorated.

-Do you have any ideas you want to share, darling?

-Not really, well, maybe. I think we should paint the Coven with their signature colours.

-Alright. Let’s start with Agatha, that way if she looks bad it won’t matter much. She owes me a bunch of cutters.

It was playful banter, she didn’t really hate Agatha, quite the opposite, she took care of the woman as if she were a daughter, looking after her, looking out for her, protecting her from the world as if she were afraid someone could break her. It was one of the main things that had attracted you to her at first, her caring, nurturing nature. She picked up an empty pipping bag and let you fill it up with the purple icing before cutting the tip. The first blob fell right in the middle of the reindeer, and since there wasn’t much she could now she carried on. The shape was horrid, but she assured you that once the details were added it would bring it all together. You weren’t very sure. The eyes looked a bit disproportionate, and the antlers were a bit thick, but all in all Lilia thought it looked good, and you didn’t want to disagree.

-My turn now, let me do Sharon. In green?

-Yeah, we have two green witches, we’ll just make Rio’s eyes brown and call it a day.

You might not have been gifted with the knife, but you sure were better with the pipping bag than Lilia. Your reindeer was more accurate, green but accurate, the small beady eyes perfectly positioned but the antlers… the looked like a bunch of worms. It suited a green witch you supposed. Lilia was quick to praise and tell you that it was beautiful, kissing your temple and watching as you did Rio’s as well, a perfect reindeer in front you down to red nose and everything. You were so excited, bouncing in her arms, her words filled with love and joy as she told you just how pretty it was. Her hands moved on to Jen, the shape of the snowwoman much easier than that of a reindeer in pretty shade of pink, the eyes and buttons brown, along with a blue scarf and orange nose. She put it aside to let the icing harden your hands working on Billy as she did Alice, both snowman that looked pretty decent taking on account that Lilia’s orange pipping bag burst in her hand just as she was finishing Alice’s body, icing all over the table and a couple of candy cane cookies.

-What a mess!

-Baking is messy, Lils. Don’t worry, there’s enough icing left to make more orange.

-But…

-It’s perfectly fine, honey, honestly. Just clean that up and I’ll make more. And those two cookies can be like orange flavoured candy canes. See? Problem solved.

-My baking hero.

Grabbing a glass after she pecked your cheek, you were quick to blend the right shade of orange, putting it inside a new pipping bag and handing it to Lilia so she could finish Alice’s body. It was beautiful to do this together, Lilia’s lines wiggly and the consistency a big lumpy when she tried to do the first few stockings until she gave up and moved on to the stars, easier in her opinion. You tried to write names on the stockings once she had moved them to your side of the table, but they were more like scribbles that no one could understand, still the colour code every member of the coven had settled for kind of helped to identify which was for which. The moment was both cozy and hilarious, pointing at the figures you were both painting, commenting, laughing and scraping to begin again only to end up with the same wiggly lines and mismatched colours. Lilia once in a while added her own touch to one of your cookies, be it a weird bow or a string of tinsel around a tree while you gave hers a more artistic touch by adding sparkles to her candy canes or little dots of colour on her reindeer’s antlers claiming that they were Christmas lights. She had laughed hard at that stating in between laboured breaths that it looked as if the poor thing had crashed a farmers’ market, and to be honest it kind of did, laughing along with her, your body pressed against her arm as you both shook and cackled. But neither of you cared, they were yours and in their horrid looks they looked perfect to you. The only thing left was to paint were you and Lilia’s gingerbread women, something that you were left in charge of as Lilia didn’t want to risk it. The pressure was real as you did Lilia’s face, her curls a mix of white and brown icing before you moved onto the clothes giving her a yellow jacket, white blouse and blue pants, the outfit you had met her in when she had been thrown out of the Witches Road after fishing her task. She had been covered in mud back then, but you weren’t one to add brown and destroy her beautiful cookie. You put as much effort in your own, dressing yourself in a pair of black trousers and a red blouse, your hair in a bun above your head.

-They look beautiful babe. Mirror images of reality.

-It’s easy when you have the perfect model in front of you. – she smiled at the compliment, a gentle pink hue dressing her cheeks. She blushed so tenderly and so beautifully.

-Flattery will get you everywhere with me, darling.

-I certainly hope so.

-As much as I love the idea of letting you have your way with me, why don’t we let these cookies settle for a bit and go out?

-Everything’s closed.

-I didn’t say that we had to go somewhere in specific. You like snow, don’t you?

-Of course!

-Then get your winter boots on and let’s make a real snowman!

-Really?!

You jumped on the spot nearly knocking over the table, Lilia’s hands shooting to grab it, your lips on her cheek before rushing to the other side of the room. You apologised while running to your closet, grabbing a jumper, a pair of thicker trousers along with some Harry Potter socks and rushing to the bathroom, your voice reaching her ears as you sang loudly, your voice filled with joy, knocking over things that were on the sink.

-Do you want to build a snowman?!

-Oh, God, not “Frozen” again.

[mandy-asimp]

When She Calls

Lilia Calderu x Life!reader (she/her)

Warnings: language, deaths, sprinkles of angst, fluff, smut (but that's for waaay down the build up), whole lotta friendship, I'm like 87% sure that's it

Summary: when Life is asked to make a promise, she doesn't seem to be able to say no. But that promise was going to be served out so much longer than what she could see.

Chapter 4

Story masterlist

chapter 5

(Happy Friday, enjoy two (4+5) chapters :))

The trial had emptied out after Agatha, except Alice stood still there. Mortified by her own body. She turned to Rio…who seemed so much wickeder than seconds ago. “Wait..that’s it? That’s all the time I get?” Rio only eyed her in the moment. “B-But I finally broke the curse! I can finally do something with my life!” A slender finger pointed towards the right, a glowing white was suddenly known. Alice was so confused.

Tears rolled down Life’s cheeks. Mourning the loss of such a life. “I’m sorry, my wild ember…”

“You.. Why are you here?” Alice stared at Life, her white hood covering the cascading waves. 

“Before Death is Life…its a balance, and I’m here to see you over. You died protecting someone, that was what you were born to do. And I know it’s unfair that you finally beat your biggest monster, and now you don’t get to continue with that pride here.” Life was so precise with her words, knowing how to present each one to be comforting.

Rio sighed, not in any annoyed way, she just did. “You continue on in my realm though. It’s not as bad as people claim it to be. Some beings wouldn’t let me torture her lives.”

Alice felt warm for just one more second. “This entire time…”

Rio walked towards the door. “Are you ready?”

The protection witch glanced back to Death, then back to her body. Tears falling lightly from her eyes. Finally, she went to meet Life’s eyes. “Did you always know this would be it? Do you know everyone’s lives?”

Life stepped closer, a caring glint in those calm grey skies. A storm always lurked in them, ready to strike at any second. “My ember, it’s time to go…I promise Death will be good to you.” She leaned closer and lowered her voice. “She likes you anyways, you protected the one she cared about. She owes you peace there. So, go on.”

Alice had eyes glazed with a swarm of emotions, a look both natural beings were used to seeing in this moment. Reluctantly, she went. Following Death into the green void and leaving Life behind. Alice walked with, although she wanted to run back. To beg for more time from Life. This didn’t feel right. 

“Even if you did go back and beg her…she’s never made an exception. She’s unfair that way.” 

That didn’t stop the woman. She was sprinting back to the door, desperate for more time. Barging back in, Life still lingered, a knowing smile was her greeting. “Please. Please, I have more to do in this world…Just a little longer and if nothing has happened then I’ll go. Just, please.”

Death stood in the doorway, waiting to collect and be on her way. Life stood in the open area, eyes gleaming with joy. “And how much longer is longer? What is it that is still out there for you?” She radiated a lively warmth.

“No! You can’t do this!” Death exclaimed from her spot. “She’s supposed to be coming with me.”

Alice instantly picked up on what was being done. “I want to explore more, to know what else I can do with my magic…wait…will I get that back?”

Life blinked her joyous tears away as her smile turned into a blinding beam. “My wild ember, your new purpose for this life will be to be my wildest ember. Do good out there and then when your time comes again, you shall have lived the life you’ve always wanted.”

A shaky breath was all Alice could get out before she was lying on the floor gasping for oxygen. Tears streamed past her temples as she slowly got herself back up. Laughing slightly before rushing out after the coven. 

Meanwhile, Life and Death stood in the cabin staring at each other. “But you couldn’t help Nicky?” Rio’s voice came calm, yet a venomous vang was bared with it. “You hardly knew her.”

“Just because I didn’t give him the full life you wanted, doesn’t mean I never helped him.” Life didn’t have any bite in her words. She was being delicate and sincere. After all, that was Rio’s son just as much as Agatha’s. “He lived the life that was designed for him. Which was longer than the original 9 months that he was supposed to have.”

But Rio shook her head and felt anger bubbling in her. “You’re distributing the order. Just like Maximoff did.”

“How can I disturb an order that I start?” 

~

Billy stared at Alice, tears full of relief spilled carefully. “But..they all said you were unsaveable?! How? Oh…oh I’ve made a mistake then..” He had so much to think over so suddenly. “Ok, wait, how are you alive?”

“Life…Lilia’s cat was Life herself and Rio told me she wouldn't budge, but I couldn’t accept that that was all I had. She cried for me…” Alice thought it all over once more, turning back to the exit and giving a grateful smile. “She really didn’t mean any harm.”

Billy hugged the woman, squeezing her tightly. “I thought I’d never get to see you again…and I also kinda knew she was Life. She helped me into this one when I was in a crash a few years ago.” He let go and reluctantly backed up. “I may have lashed on everyone and thrown them off The Road.” He hung his head in shame. 

“Well…in your defense you defended Agatha for how long only for her to prove it to be meaningless.” Alice stepped closer and placed her hand on his shoulder. “You were upset. You had lost a friend.”

Life hummed, appearing from around the trees. “It’s a funny thing isn’t it? Life? Me? You two are special though. You have a different protection to you. One that keeps you on a steady path, of course a few bumps and potholes, but that’s just life for you.” She was so polite as the two crushed her in a hug. It warmed her to know that this was that human connection she had been searching for. 

It was the warmth of good friends bringing out this new fit of laughter. It was full of serotonin and soon the other two were laughing just as well. All growing rosy hues to their cheeks. “Is this your doing?” Billy chuckled out, his cheeks slightly starting to hurt. “Were you the one responsible for the tears?”

Life couldn't contain laughter at all. “I’m sorry!” She was trying to get them down to mere giggles, but it seemed useless. “Sometimes, when I understand and truly feel what you all do, I can't help but to want to infect every life around me.” She had finally managed to subside the dominating feeling. “If it makes you feel any better, Salem Seven also just broke out into a fit of laughter.”

“You don’t understand human emotions? But if you create us?” Alice furrowed her brows. How could Life not know what feelings…felt like?

Her shoulders raised to her ears, “I don’t exactly create you, you’re still created by your parents, but your very life is from me. I’m the first one to really know you and everything you’re destined for within this life. However, because I know all of your choices and next steps, I’m not allowed to interact with you all often. But I had once made a promise that took and forced me to break that. I’ve learned very little as a cat, mostly because as a cat I can’t understand humans.”

“What was the promise?” Both had curiosity, it twisted in the deep browns and shined under the rising light. 

Agatha however scoffed. “Does it matter? We’re walking The Road with Life herself. No doubt Death must be near.” The witch then saw Alice standing right alongside them. “And here I thought you had no heart.” The stab was deep.

“That’s funny coming from the witch killer.” Billy took the lead to argue. “At least she uses her magic for good unlike you.”

Her eyes narrowed onto the boy. Picking him apart bit by bit. “Same way it's funny that the son of The Scarlet Witch is on The Road? Tell me…how did you come across this vessel? How did you escape the grasp of the Hex?” 

“Ease up, Harkness.” Life flatly said. Eyes ready to throw daggers at her if she said anything out of line. Billy stayed silent on the matter, he knew the truth, and so did Life.

“Alright, fine. You dont wanna tell me. But don’t you dare feel guilty about your talents. You survived like witches have been doing for years!  You saw an opportunity, an empty vessel, and you moved in! So you broke a few rules and slipped past this one!” Her hand gestured to Life. “That's what kept you alive! That’s what makes you a witch. That’s what makes you special.” She stood toe-to-toe with him. She needed to make sure he knew that he did what anyone would do in his situation if given the chance. “It’s nice to see you again…Billy.”

He let out a subtle breath. “Billy…William…you can hear me now?”

“Everyone can, every witch with a beating heart.” Life hummed from next to Alice. Her tone was inviting, the same one she used to lure him to his second chance. She sent him a small wink. 

“But this doesn’t answer-” he let his complaint fall once he met those cool grey eyes that told him everything he needed to know for now. “It’s further down my path.”

“Well, if we want to finish thi-”

“We?” Billy interrupted Agatha. “I don’t think I even need you anymore. I don’t know if I ever did. And especially after the last trial…we,” he directed it towards the three facing the brunette witch. “We will finish this road without you.”

Her brow quirked high into the air, and then it fell into a teasing look. “Hmm…what could Billy Maximoff want from the road?” She crept closer, soon to start circling around the young witch. “Is it…find mama? No, she chose an entire town of strangers over her own flesh and wires! Is it…find Papa? No...we all know that robot is offline somewhere. So who does that leave?” Her index finger tapped against her chin as she slowed to be right in front. “Oh that's right! There's two of you! You’re after Toby!”

Even Alice winced at the clear usage of the wrong name. “Tommy.” Billy had corrected her.

“That’s what I said!” Agatha kept poking. “And let me guess, Life’s just unfair?” The blue eyes snapped over immediately. “She had to obviously let you slip past her. I’ve never known her to let one go by. Everyone is destined for Death. But to let only you slip by and not your twin brother? Doesn’t that make you wonder why she only saved one of you?” Life stood silent, intrigued with where she was going to take this. “I mean, if she has the ability to bring Alice back with all her power…why couldn’t she help him as well?”

Billy slowly spun, questioning eyes bored into the figure in white. He waited for the answer to come out on its own. Especially since her mind was so silent. “Tommy couldn’t hear me the way you could. I wanted you to hear my calls…but that doesn’t mean he’s gone for good.”

“So he’s still out there?!” Billy was instantly filled with this hope that this, all this chaos, wasn't going to a waste. “Then we finish this.” He shifted back to face Agatha, “but just know. I do not trust you. At all. I never have.” It was cold and distancing. 

Something Agatha was so used to already, all she did was let her smile fall and agree. “Fine. Let's move then. Last one to the next trial is a nice person.”

~

Chapter 6.

[aggieharkness]

would you do a story with lilia calderu maybe surrounding substance misuse? like maybe hiding it from her? you can decide the details of it all

Survivor

Pairing: Lilia Calderu x reader

Summary: It is said that time heals but you hadn't believed it at all, the dark thoughts crushing you once again, drawing you into a past that you wanted to run away from. You had felt so alone. But she took your hands and steadied you, guided you to the light. Perhaps time didn't heal, but you were sure Lilia did

Warnings: substance misuse, mention of drugs, mention of alcohol, alcoholism, past abuse, past child abuse, bullying, implied suicide. I'm sorry if I've forgotten any warnings.

Authors note: I'm sorry it took me a bit longer to post, but I hope that this story is what you were expecting and that if it hits close to home that it helps you heal and move forward. Some of the experiences are real and are my own, so please, be kind. If there is anything at all that you don't like, tell me and I'll change it, or if you want something else, I'm here. Thanks for the request, btw.

Special thanks to @renafisher27 for checking part of it. Love you girl!

Survivor

You were two hours late. Lilia glanced at the clock on the wall, the thin black hands staring back at her, telling her that you were not going to come. The table had been set, a beautiful rose in the middle of it surrounded by candles, a delicious meal in the oven that had turned cold a while ago, the smell lingering in the air. You had promised you would come to her tonight, that you would spend a quiet evening together, you had sworn you would be there, but alas, the house was empty except for the silence that dressed Lilia’s sorrow. She had thought you cared about her, she had let herself believe you cared about her, but it was obvious that you did not, or at least not enough to think that this entire date might be important to her, that you were important to her. She felt anger rising on her chest as the clock struck nine, and in a gust of fury she stood from her chair and stomped towards the front door, grabbing her shawl and purse. She didn’t bother to blow the candles, her magic sparkled incessantly in between her fingers making the lights flicker and the flames vanish into nothing, thin threads of smoke rising up in the air in rivulets.

You lived next door, literally a door down from her, which made things even worse as Lilia, in a beautiful dark grey dress with spaghetti straps, rushed down the street, her gown brushing the dirty pavement as her heels made loud footsteps until she stood before your building. The lock was broken, and no one had bothered to fix it yet, so she pushed the gates, the metal of the door banging and bouncing against the wall, the loud sound echoing out into the street, but she didn’t care, she had a mission, and she was going to tell you exactly what she thought of your behaviour. But upon reaching your door she stopped. What if you were not there? What if you had been in a terrible accident and had hurt yourself? What if you had… died? She began to spiral into this sea of what ifs, images clouding her mind as her feet paced from one side of the empty hallway to the other. If it had indeed happened, why hadn’t she seen it, she should have seen your demise, no one she had ever cared about hadn’t passed without her not having seen it first. Maybe you had not gone to her house because you were working late, had she even asked you at what time did you get out today?

Noises coming from the other side of the door woke her up from her spiralling, the sounds calming her racing heart. You were home. Wait, you were home! She felt the anger spiking again, only muffled by the fact that you were alive, but that did not stop her from using her spare key and barging in. Now this was something she had not expected. All the lights were off, not even the streetlights could be seen coming from the windows, it was as if she had walked into a deep dark tunnel, and the simple feeling that she got as she stepped inside made her shiver on the spot. Something was wrong, she could sense it, but she could not figure out what it was as she traded careful over the carpet, the door left ajar so a little bit of light could come in. The entire apartment was quiet, the noises she had just heard faint memories by then, her breathing and her own blood pumping through her veins, the only sounds that her ears could hear. Upon reaching the intersection between the kitchen and the living room her foot kicked something. It was cold to the touch of her bare toes, and it seemed to be cylindrical, her eyes fighting to get a better view of the object as she pushed it from under her dress. How odd, what was an empty bottle of vodka doing on the floor?

She had never seen you drink, not even when you two went out on dates, no, you always choose water or juices, maybe a hot chocolate if it was a breakfast date, but never ever alcohol. Had you… had you brought someone home? She could not bare the thought of you doing something like that to her, her heart breaking slightly at the possibility that you had cheated on her. There she had been, at home, waiting like a fool for you to rush into her arms only to find out that there might be someone other than her holding you in bed, whispering sweet nothings into your ear. Someone loving you like she did. She was letting her mind wander once again, and she could not afford it, she had to find you, so she forced herself to breath deeply, letting those thoughts be pushed to the back of her mind, after all it was only an empty bottle on the floor, it could mean literally anything. She lifted herself off the floor, the bottle in her hand as she stepped into the living room. It was even darker, the windows blocked by something, but how was she supposed to make her way towards them if she could not see what was two inches in front of her? This is how people die in horror movies, she thought.

Each step took her closer to a big object she could sort of make out the shape off, crashing into it after a moment, nearly bending over what she realised was the couch. Okay, she had to see, a freaking vampire could come out of any corner at any minute, and she’d be dammed if she was going to fight one in the dark. It had happened before, and it had not been a pleasant experience. With a snap of her fingers a tiny little bulb of yellow light brightened the room, a sigh of relief puffing out as she was finally able to see, but what her eyes came across with as she took in the room was far from what she had expected. The couch had clothes spread all over it, whether they were clean or not she could not tell, but there was certainly this thick odour that resembled that of a closed house, as if you had not bothered to ventilate in weeks. You had not spent that much time down at her place, this wasn’t something related to you sleeping with her, it ran deeper, she could feel it in her bones. Rounding the couch, she saw containers of different takeaways laying over the coffee table, rotting food inside, though the smell had not yet spread throughout the room.

Alarms had begun to go in her head the instant she had stepped into your house, but now she could have almost lit up like a Christmas trees had she had warning lights. This, whatever it was, was very very wrong, more bottles laying in between blankets and under the couch and tables, her eyes finally seeing that there were cardboards against the windows so no light would come in. Why would you do that? You loved the sunlight, you adored walking with her in the park, down in the woods, any place Lilia desired, she could not comprehend why you would run away from it now. A sound came from the other side of the apartment, startling her to the point that she almost tripped with a bag that you had left in the middle of the floor, making her turn her body towards the source of the noise and begin walking in slow steps. It had to be you, unless it was a thief, or worse, a murderer; Divine Mother, she needed to stop doing this to herself, she was going to give herself a heart attack one of these days. Reaching the foyer again the light from her fingers showed that your bedroom was right across the hall, the door ajar, a gentle blue light coming from under it as the noises got louder until suddenly, she heard your voice. It was quiet, and she could not understand very well what you were saying, but she picked up on the hurt tone that tainted them. Carefully she pushed it open until she could finally see you.

This room was the worst out of the entire house. There weren’t only bottles spread all throughout the floor, desk and nightstands, but packets of beers and premade cocktails laying over the ruined carpet, clothes and trash everywhere. Lilia flicked the switch so the lamp above your head would light up the room instead of the screen of your phone, but nothing happened, the motion making you turn your head over your shoulders from the spot you had on your bed, your back to the door. What was Lilia doing there? Was the alcohol making you see things? It wasn’t supposed to do that, the drugs were, but you hadn’t taken any, yet. Shit, you had forgotten about the date. Looking up at her you were waiting for the moment she would start screaming at you, telling you how utterly disgusting you looked and how disappointed she was, but it never came, she could only stare dumbfounded at you, your eyes raking over her beautiful dress and tidy curls to the bottle of vodka that she had in her hand. Lilia could not even begin to process the way you were looking at her, like a child who was waiting to be scolded, to be yelled at, your make up smeared all over your cheeks and chin, splatters of alcohol staining your clothes, a notebook in front of your crossed legs, a bag with a white powder resting over your left knee. Oh, Divine Mother, you were… no… you couldn’t be. Your hoarse voice and slurred words reached her ears, but it was the terrified tone what hit her heart as if it had just been run over by a train.

-Get out! You are not supposed to be here!

-Y/N

-NO! I CAN’T DO THIS WITH YOU HERE!

-Do what? – you had never raised your voice at her, in nearly a year of being with her the most she had heard you scream was one time when you had almost burnt yourself as you were pulling out a roasted chicken from the oven. That had been a funny little moment, but this was far from that, this was bad, really bad, and Lilia found herself dropping the empty bottle on a chair and walking to your side as slowly as possible, kneeling gently in front of you. Her hands itched to take yours but you were holding onto your hoody with such strength that it was making your knuckles white. - Y/N, please, tell me what’s wrong.

-I can’t. Please, Lilia, please, go away. This is not… I’m not… You are not supposed to see this. GO HOME!

-Y/N.

Suddenly your phone rang, the ringtone loud and shrilling in your ears, the name of some woman appearing on the screen. You growled at the sight, picking it up and motioning your arm as to throw it against the wall, but Lilia’s warm hand stopped you, wrapping around your wrist and pulling it down gently, your fingers letting go of the phone until it fell with a thud over the mattress. You stared up at her, the tears that had stopped falling about ten minutes ago returning in earnest, those big doe eyes of hers watching you as if you were something broken. You could not fight it, you were. The horrid sound carried on until you slid your finger over the green sign to answer it, the sound of a woman’s voice filling up the space after you tapped on the speaker symbol. If this is how things were going to come out, if Lilia was going to learn the truth tonight, might as well do it right.

-Oh, so now you answer the phone!

-Please, stop calling mom. I can’t do this, not again.

-Is this how you speak to me?! You owe me your life you ungrateful bitch! I put a stop to my own to raise you, you owe me Y/N.

-I don’t owe you shit! – you turned your body away from Lilia’s touch, unsure of how you were going to react all throughout the conversation; you didn’t want her to get hurt, she did not deserve to end up in harm’s way because of your messy life. - Every time you call is to ask for money or to insult me and degrade me and I can’t do it! I was clean mom, for a fucking year; I was doing great and then you had to come back! WHY?!

-DON’T YOU FUCKING DARE SCREAM AT ME! IT’S YOUR OWN FAULT THAT YOU’VE FALLEN BACK INTO DRINKING. YOU ARE WEAK, USELESS!

-STOP! FOR FUCK’S SAKES STOP! YOU LEFT ME ALONE FOR A YEAR, ONE WHOLE ASS YEAR AND I GOT CLEAN! WHY HAVE YOU COME BACK?!

-IF THIS IS HOW YOU ARE GOING TO BEHAVE, IF THIS IS HOW UNGRATEFUL YOU STILL ARE, MAYBE YOU SHOULD HAVE DIED WHEN YOU HAD THAT OVERDOSE TWO YEARS AGO!

The silence that followed was fucking deafening, your limbs feeling like lead as her words stabbed you deep, the phone slipping from your fingers until it landed on the bed, so very deep that you grabbed the closest bottle, whiskey Lilia saw, and brought it to your lips, but she was faster and pushed it away, fighting with you to take it from your hands until it slipped onto the floor, crashing against the wood, the amber liquid spreading and staining the edge of the carpet. The only thing you wanted to do was crawl into a ball and wait until death claimed you. You hurt too much; you felt exactly like your mother had said, weak, useless, a fucking failure and Lilia was now there to see the real you when you had fought so hard to hide all this from her. She didn’t deserve someone as broken as you, you thought, the phone forgotten at the foot of the bed as your mother kept talking, berating you. She had never stopped, since the moment you had been placed in her arms you had been a mistake, an accident that should have never happened, and both her and life had never stopped reminding you. The only person that had cared for you simply because had been Lilia, and now she would run away like all of them had done before her. You could not do this, you just couldn’t, your face hidden into your pillow as you cried, hands over your ears to drown out your mother’s voice.

-Listen here lady, - Lilia stepped in then, picking up your phone and bring it to close to her lips, her voice clear and hard, so cold that if you had been at the receiving end, you would have felt a shiver running down your spine. This was clearly a recuring event in your life, one you had never mentioned, but that wasn’t important right now, the main thing was to get your mother to shut up. - I don’t know who you are, but I can tell you one thing. Y/N is not weak, or useless or any of the many things you’ve called her, she’s the most wonderful woman I have ever met.

-Who the hell are you? Y/N, are you still there? Who the fuck am I talking to?!

-I’m her girlfriend and you need to…

-Oh, so you are trying to ruin someone else now? Great job Y/n, fucking fantastic. Are you going to call me again crying “mommy mommy, they’ve stolen from me, they’ve broken my heart” like the fucking pathetic idiot you are?!

-I will not tolerate this talk from you lady! I don’t know who the hell you think you might be, but you have no right to speak to Y/N this way. You are supposed to be the most important person in her life, the one she can trust, and you are failing at that. Maybe Y/N is not be faulted for what you have driven her to do! She’s not weak, she’s not a failure, she has survived you, and that says plenty. If you had acted as a mother when you were supposed to, she would not be like this now!

-Who the fuck…

-I’M TALKING AND YOU WILL WAIT UNTIL I’M DONE! – the other woman fell silent, stunned at the other end of the phone, probably unused to someone actually having the balls to tell her to keep her mouth shut, but Lilia was on a roll, and she keep talking without even noticing. - You have no right to say to her that she should have died when she was at rock bottom, and she needed you! So how about you say what you phoned her for, and we can all end this before we say things that we will fully regret.

-Well… Now she has a defender. This is new. I’ll tell you what’s going to happen lady, she’s going to go back to doing drugs and to drinking when life doesn’t handle her things on a silver plate and drag you down with her. She’s always been a spoiled brat, and she will remain being so.

-THAT’S NOT TRUE! – you jolted from your spot to kneel in front of Lilia, snatching the phone from her hand, your face red from crying, your voice so loud that you were sure your neighbours would come down in a minute and reprimand you. -YOU NEVER GAVE ME SHIT; I HAD TO GO TO THE NEIGHBOURS HOUSE TO GET FOOD AND RIDES TO SCHOOL BECAUSE YOU WEREN’T THERE! WHEN I BROKE MY ARM YOU MADE ME GO TO SCHOOL WITH A FUCKING STICK TIED TO A BEDSHEET BECAUSE YOU DIDN’T WANT TO TAKE ME TO THE DOCTORS!

-HERE WE GO AGAIN WITH THE LIES! THAT’S WHAT YOUR TEACHERS ALWAYS USE TO SAY; YOU LIED TO GET OUT OF DETENTION BECAUSE YOU COULD NOT FACE THE CONSEQUENCES TO YOUR ACTIONS!

-I WAS CHASED OUT OF THE FUCKING DINNING HALL AND THOUGHT I WAS GOING TO BE FUCKING KILLED!! IT WASN’T MY FAULT! NONE OF THIS WAS! WHY WON’T ANYONE LISTEN TO ME?!

-LIARS DON’T DESERVE TO BE HEARD! YOU BROUGHT THIS ON YOURSELF!

The scream that tore out of your throat was so raw, so full of pain that it felt as if you were tearing it out of your chest, maybe you were ripping it out of your broken and smashed heart. This was why you had poured everything that had ever happened to you into drugs and alcohol, they made you numb, they made you forget, they killed you at a faster rate, but tonight the four bottles of vodka, tequila and whiskey didn’t seem to have the desired effect, quite the opposite, everything felt worse, a thousand times worse. Your mother’s words had cut deep, so fucking deep that you were nearly bleeding into your mattress, the phone forgotten somewhere over the carpet as you had throwing it against the floor, your hands grabbing your hair and pulling hard as if that could make the pain lessen. You could not hear anything but you own sobs, breaths hurried to the point that you were sure you would hyperventilate in a moment if you didn’t control it soon, but how could you with how the world was crushing down around you once more.

You had spent your entire life telling everyone around you the things that people had done to you, of the abuse, of the lies, the deceit, the injuries, everything, and they all had had one thing in common; oh, your poor mother must have felt awful, they said. What a fucking bunch of assholes you had thought. No one had ever asked how YOU were doing, if you were over it, if it still hurt, if it caused you problems. No on cared about you and you just couldn’t handle it, not anymore. You had been labelled a liar for as long as you could remember, everything was your fault; when that boy had smashed a rock on your head, it had been your fault, when you had been pushed down the stairs, you had been at fault as well, when your teachers had pulled you out of your classroom and had yelled at you that you were crazy and that you would become a criminal by the time you were eighteen, blowing up cars and such, you had cried and you yourself had thought, this is my fault as well. Lilia could not bring herself to say anything, she turned your phone to see that the screen was cracked, but the call had ended, thankfully, and she simply picked it up and placed it on the nightstand before turning her attention to you, her shawl and purse resting on the carpet.

She moved her hands slowly up to your arms, but the instant her fingers rested on your wrists you moved away quickly, crawling hurriedly to the edge of the bed until your hands were on the floor, rushing the nearest corner. She knew you were scared, that you were in pain, she wasn’t a stranger to all those feelings, but she had never known that you were experiencing them so strongly. She sighed and stood, rounding the bed and making her way to you, sitting in front of your shaky form. All those bottles she had seen couldn’t be from today, you had gone back to drinking, but why? Was it all your mother, was it something else, a mix of circumstances that you could not have prevented? There were so many questions that she needed answers to, but you were in no position to give them to her, and her priority wasn’t getting them, but making sure that you were alright. She sat a bit closer, her knees nearly touching yours, but she remained at a certain distance to give you space should you need it.

-May I… May I touch you Y/N? – you lifted your head from where it was hidden in your arms, tears running down your cheeks, face puffed and red. Why was she still here? Did she like seeing you run down? Others had thrived in seeing you crying, destroyed on the floor, they had loved to see you as a shell of yourself. Your eyes locked with hers, but you didn’t see any of that happiness and power the others had had, she was looking at you with worry, with a caring aura about her that took you by surprise.

-Why are you here?

-I was worried about you. Actually, I was angry thinking you had forgotten about me and our date.

-I… I did. I’m sorry, I messed everything up. – you crawled back into yourself a little, breaking her gaze and looking down at the floor, ashamed.

-You did not.

-You don’t have to lie to me, I know I did. You probably had something awesome prepared, and I did not go because I was too busy fucking up my life again.

-If you say that you’ve been clean for a year, why did you go back to all this?

-Because she called. – she barely heard the words you had whispered, your head practically tucked into your chest and arms. With careful movements Lilia tried her luck once more, placing her hand on your wrist, smiling a bit as you didn’t pull away, the warmth of her skin over yours a contrast with the coolness of your room. Why was she being so nice to you? Did she pity you? It wouldn’t be the first time someone had taken advantage of you because they made you believe they cared only to pity you and your disaster of a life. Your body did not fight her when tenderly she took you in her arms, sitting with her back against the wall and you on her lap. She smelled so nice, so much like home, and you held onto the straps of her dress as if they were lifelines, saving you from a deep abyss that was calling out your name.

-When was the first time she called?

-A couple of weeks ago.

-Do you want to tell me why?

-Money. She only ever calls for money. – Lilia cradled your head closer to her chest, and though she knew it wouldn’t take away your pain perhaps she could dimmish it as best she could, but to get to that point she knew you both had to cross a very dangerous bridge. – She’s always been like that, taking it all as soon as I started working when I was sixteen just so she could spoil her stupid boyfriends. I couldn’t even pay for college. I had been saving for like three years to go to community college and she took it. She took it all, didn’t even leave a cent because her fucking boyfriend wanted to go to Hawaii!

-But this time you didn’t give in and she’s mad, right?

-I didn’t give in to her but… I don’t want to talk about it anymore.

-Darling, I know it hurts; I know you feel ashamed, but things won’t get better unless you share this with me. You know I love you and I won’t ever judge you for what you might have done, for how you learnt to cope with it all. – tears were still running down your cheeks, but she did not care, she tilted your head until your puffy red eyes were staring back at her brown deep ones, her voice quiet and loving as she spoke to you. - Talk to me Y/N.

-You will think me a stupid kid, like the rest of them. You will side with my mum and when I’m done you will say that I overreacted and that I let myself fall into this because I didn’t grow up. I don’t want to see that from you Lilia. – you had begun to slip from her arms to try and gain as much distance from her as possible knowing that your heart couldn’t take it if she dumped you. She had meant so much to you, she still did, and you honestly thought that she would always be the most important person that had ever entered your life, but her touch was hard and yet tender, and she didn’t let you move more than just a few inches from her grasp.

-Hey, have I ever left you alone when you were down, when you were having a bad day at work or when you were just simply feeling bad about yourself?

-No.

-Then what makes you think that I will now? I’m not like other people, I know how it feels to be abandoned, to not know what to do with yourself when the pain is all consuming. I’m not going anywhere.

-I don’t think I can do this Lilia. I don’t have the strength.

-Then let me be strong for you. You need to let it out before you can begin to heal, as painful as it may be.  

There was truth is every word she spoke, in the way her eyes glinted under the light that was coming from her fingers, the yellow glow reflecting on her peppery curls and olive kissed skin as she caressed your cheeks. You had been to therapist after therapist since the age of eight, and yeah, they had heard you but they had never listened, they had never ever done shit for you, and yet, looking up at Lilia in the darkness of your room, protected and safe in her embrace, somehow you felt as if she could solve all the problems in the universe, as if she was your before and after that could heal and pull you out of this horrible mess you had found yourself in. Your mouth opened several times, but nothing came out. You just didn’t know where to start, how much to tell her, what might be too much, it had been years since you had shared your darkest thoughts with anyone. Looking down at your hands as they rubbed the skin of Lilia’s fingers you saw the ring you had gifted her on her birthday. It wasn’t expensive or exclusive, it was a very simple thing you had found in a small shop with a beautiful deep yellow stone mounted on a thin golden ring. She had never taken it off in all that time, not even once, and as your fingertips brushed over it you made the jump, praying that this was the right thing to do.

-It all stared when I was really young. She wasn’t a good mother; she would always leave me to fend for myself while she went out or to work. The first time was when I was two and it’s a miracle I didn’t die, but I suppose I was a smart kid, and the neighbours knew just how shitty she was and how she behaved, so they helped out. I couldn’t understand why I didn’t have what others did, why my mum didn’t seem to love me. I never had Christmas gifts or birthdays; the party you threw for me was the first one I had ever had. – Lilia could not believe what she was hearing. You had never celebrated your birthday, you had never ever been celebrated in your entire life? She could understand that for herself, she was well past four hundred years old, but you? You were barely in your twenties, you were a baby compared to her, you deserved to have someone show you just how much you meant to them, to party and be happy with useless gifts being given to you and cake and kisses, but she had been the only one to show you? It made sense now why you had looked at her unsure of what you were supposed to do. – I was a confused child that didn’t understand why I was always pushed to a corner and forgotten there. Things only got worse when I began school. They hated me, they didn’t even bother to get to know me before they started insulting me and bullying me. I remember one time, when I was four, how I was sitting on the playground and a boy crossed the whole thing, and it was like maybe fifteen or twenty feet, until he stood before me with a big piece of concrete in his hand and smashed it on the side of my head. I remember seeing partially black with my left eye and just how like in movies, when you see this circle that starts getting smaller and smaller until everything’s black? – you felt Lilia nod her head from where it rested on top of your messy hair, her hands rubbing soothing patterns on your legs. - I got knocked out and I know I was bleeding like a pig, but the school told my mother that it had been just a scratch, and that blood was always just so scandalous, but she didn’t even care. I could have bleed to my death, and she would have been perfectly alright with it. I was always being thrown out of class and the school was always calling her for every little fuck up I did. She was always so pissed when I got home, sometimes she would leave me in the laundry room, locked away so she wouldn’t have to hear me crying when I came home with bruises, trying to find comfort in her. Things never got easier or better.

-You… you said something before, that you were chased? Was that in that same school?

-Yeah, she wouldn’t even consider sending me to a different district, it would have been to much of a hassle for her. It happened… I… This one’s hard, Lilia.

-Take your time, darling, I promise I’m not going anywhere. – you took a deep breath, sensing how the terror you had felt back then was returning. Every time you thought about it, whenever you let the memories plague you and overrun your mind you felt the fear taking over, your grasp on Lilia’s hand harder, nails nearly digging onto her skin.  

-I was like nine, I think. I had just finished lunch, and I was leaving my tray when I saw three boys from my classroom following me outside. I didn’t think anything at first but when I turned left, and they followed I began to get nervous. It wouldn’t have been the first time they had followed me until I started running, leaving me to look like an idiot around the playground but… this time they started running as well. My legs burnt and my heart was beating so fast I thought it was going to explode but I couldn’t stop running, I felt it in my bones that I was going to get hurt, if not killed, if I stopped. I was beyond terrified, running all over school grounds screaming for help, but no one came. They never did. It wasn’t until the bell rang and they rushed to get to class that I could finally stop, kneeling on the hard ground, crying in terror. I truly believed I would go home in a black bag that day, and the worst thing was that I knew my mother would never shed a tear. When I got to class, shaking like a leaf I was reprimanded by the teacher for being late, and when I tried to explain what had happened, she yelled at me for talking back and threw me out. If the teacher didn’t believe me, how was I supposed to tell my mother? But I did anyway, and she laughed. I thought I was going to fucking die and she laughed.

-Oh, Y/N.

-Don’t pity me, please. – you hid your face in her chest, you couldn’t bring yourself to look at her, you just knew she was looking at you as if you were a broken thing, and that coming from her would kill you. Your tears soaked the neckline of her dress, the hand that was still holding onto her gown pulling her closer, making yourself as small as you could in her arms, knees pressed against your chest. - I can’t take it, it’s been two decades, and I still can’t take it, I can’t move on.

-I know, darling, I know. It’s hard when you’ve been on your own for so long.

-I nearly killed myself. I was so ashamed when I failed, thinking that perhaps I deserved all the horrible things that were happening. Everyone just kept telling me that it was my fault, on a loop, over and over and over, and in the end, I believed it. But I was a coward, I couldn’t end it all, I couldn’t go through with it and the only way I found that I could numb the pain was with drugs and alcohol.

-When was the first time you did it?

-The drugs or the alcohol?

-Either of them? Both?

-I had weed first. It was harmless, I felt good but then things would crush around me when I got down, and I hated the feeling, so I started drinking. It was easier, cheaper as well, and I could do it at home, in school, it didn’t matter, I would not remember what had happened and that made feel as if my life was normal, as if there was no abuse, no pain, no broken bones or screams ringing in my ears. I was sixteen when I was able to buy with a fake ID as much bottles as I wanted, and it was also the first time I got so drunk that I passed out on the street until the next morning, when the police took me home. My mother did the performance of her life showing herself as a worried perfect mother, but as soon as the door closed, she beat the shit out of me. I had spent her money, that’s all she fucking said.

-You could have died Y/N.

-Don’t you think I knew? Sometimes I think that I was trying to kill myself this way, so I wouldn’t have to face the shame of actually having to shoot myself or jump out of a window. It was stupid, but I couldn’t stop. Drinks helped move everything along, until they felt passive, as if they weren’t cutting for me anymore so I started with the drugs. Whatever I could do, cocaine, heroin, weed again. I took things that I didn’t even knew the name of, getting so high that the world seemed bearable again, like a walk in the park, but my grades were slipping, and the teachers were beyond cruel, making sure I knew I was failure. So, I tried to get clean when I was eighteen, started saving for college and all that, but the relapses just kept happening, over and over and then mum threw me out. I didn’t have a penny to my name, I almost lost my job, all I had was the drinks and the drugs, so I gave up. I went down the rabbit hole and I couldn’t get out; I didn’t want to get out. She would show up all the fucking time though, it didn’t matter if I changed my number or if I moved apartments, she would call me and find me and every little thing I had improved on she would just destroy it. When I set foot in your shop, I was looking for a reason to overdose again, I was hoping you would say something that would make think that I was done, but you didn’t.

-I could see your pain, I could see that you were lost, I wanted to help you. I wanted to guide you in the right direction, and so did the cards. I could see your kind soul, no matter what you have done.

-You say that now, but I have done things that you wouldn’t like, at all. I tried to steal phones, I tried to steal money, I tried to hurt people to make them feel the same pain they were inflicting on me.

-Didn’t you notice the key word, dear?

-Key word? – had you ever got to tell anyone so much about yourself? You couldn’t recall when it had been the last time someone had actually actively listened to your every word without judging, without telling you that you had been weak. You were unused to this. Lilia was still cradling you in her arms, only releasing you when you turned around to face her, silent tears still falling down your cheeks, but her eyes didn’t look at you with the pity you had expected, there was only love and comfort in those deep chocolate windows from which you could see her soul, her thoughts almost.  

-Tried, which means that you never truly did all those things. You felt like you needed to, but something stopped you. What?

-If I did it, I would have been blamed, found out because it did not matter what was going on, I was always the first one to be blamed for everything. It would not hurt them, it would be slightly inconveniences that they would move on from while I would still be there, getting high to deal with their abuse. I was already suffering, why add more?

-That says something about you.

-That I’m dumb?

-That you are still kind. You saw that that it would only hurt yourself and instead of doing something worse you took a step back to protect yourself, to not add more pain to your life. You still cared enough to not let them turn you into something that you are not.

-But what am I? Who am I? – there was this pressure on your chest, this heaviness in the words you were both speaking that made a lump form on your throat, a brand-new batch of tears clouding your vision, the hot crystal drops burning your skin as they fell, but they didn’t get past your nose before Lilia’s thumbs were wiping them.

-You are Y/N, a kind, gentle woman that loves to sneak into my kitchen and take my cookies when they’ve come out right out of the oven, who loves to walk with me down at the park, who kisses me when my visions get really bad and cuddles me when I’m feeling down. You are the most remarkable person I have ever met, and nothing that those people have ever said it’s true, not a single word.

-How do you know?

-Because in all this time that you’ve been with me, you were clean.

She had looked at you that night as if she had held every answer to questions you hadn’t even thought about, things that would crush you under their truth and you hadn’t been able to move past what she had said to you. When you had entered her shop you had wanted to die more than anything in the world, your life was going nowhere and you had no reason why you should get clean, but she had changed it all when she had taken your hands and sat you down at her little table. Lilia had taken your broken pieces and had started glueing them together, with gold showing from your cracks because you past didn’t define you, but it helped you become the person you were supposed to be. It had shaped you; it had pushed you to the ground and had placed a foot on your throat until the right person had come into your life, someone who with her tender hands had steadied you, had shown you the way and had pulled out from the dark tunnel you had been thrown in. Falling in love with her had been so easy, so right and comfortable and it had happened without either of you noticing. You couldn’t even remember when something that had been nothing had become something until it meant everything.

She had become your world, and this witch that sometimes had this gaps and visions, that loved to have a midnight snack while watching reruns of Murder She Wrote and who held your hand whenever she could, deserved more than the you that had been back then. The first night you had met her you had stayed away from your apartment, sleeping on her couch, wondering the next morning when it had been the last time you had woken up remembering what had happened the night before, thinking that watching her smile as she busied herself with some tea and toasts, that kind smile gracing her lips whenever she looked at you over her shoulder, would be a lovely sight to wake up to. When you had returned home, she had plagued your mind, her words echoing in your brain, but you hadn’t had the strength to let go of all the things you had become so accustomed to. The alcohol remined in your cupboard for three days, and the bags of heroin and cocaine in your nightstand for a week before you built the courage to start afresh. Lilia deserved a person who could enjoy life beside her, who would remember her the next day, who would not go missing for days to get drunk and high under a bridge or in the middle of a park, and it was clear that she wanted that person to be you. It was harder than ever before, the temptation to fall back into it all came from every corner, but you would not give in, you had made up your mind about it, and you would never let Lilia know that you had this problem, you couldn’t risk losing her if she found out about it all. And yet here you two were, back at the beginning and at the same time feeling like you had come so far.

-But I lied to you. I kept all this hidden away and now it has exploded in my face. I’m weak Lilia.

-No, you are not. – her hands took hold of your head gently, forcing you to look at her square in the face, determination written all over her lovely features. – You are the strongest person I’ve ever known, you are a fighter, a survivor. The things you have gone through I cannot imagine them, but the fact that you are still here speaks volumes. I won’t lie to you, knowing that you’ve kept this from me hurts, it makes me think that you didn’t trust me enough, but I understand now why you felt like you couldn’t tell me. You’ve been deceived far too many times, but I promise you, love, never again. You and I will get through this, together.

-I’m sorry. I never wanted to hurt you.

-Don’t apologise, there’s no need. You’ve been apologising for existing your entire life, and it is about time that the world apologised to you. I’m sorry Y/N, for not seeing that your pain was far greater than what I thought. I’m sorry that you didn’t have someone to lean on, to cry to, to find comfort in. I’m sorry that all those adults that were supposed to protect you, failed you and drove you to the edge.

-But you didn’t do it, why are you sorry?

-Because you need to hear it. You need to know that it was never you, it was everybody else. You were a kid, and they didn’t let you be one, and then you were a teenager, and you weren’t allowed that either, but now you are an adult, and you are not alone. You can be whoever you want, and I will be here until the very end.

-I want to be who you deserve. I want to go out on dates with you, I want to watch films and make you laugh and not worry about my mother or anybody else except for you. I want to go out and look at the sky and remember it, I want to feel love and hurt and pain and happiness and not numb it all, because that’s life and I want to experience it to the best of my abilities. I want to recover, Lilia.

-Then we will start by blocking your mother’s number and deleting it. – the phone was perhaps a foot from you, but you could not bring yourself to reach for it, the first doubts already filling your head, but Lilia was there, and she bent her body over the floor to grab it, moving you along with her, unblocking it and tapping on the three dots that showed up on the right, a popup showing the dreading words “Block” and a bin saying “Delete”. Your arms felt like lead as you tried to lift them. You had done this more than twenty times before, why couldn’t you now?! It was frustrating to feel like this. Lilia could see the fight happening through your eyes, only a few silent tears still falling down your cheeks every once in a while, and since you seemed unable to take the step, she made the decision for you, grabbing you hand and placing your index finger hovering over the bright screen, her touch leaving you until it was your own hand alone a few inches from your future. – I can’t do it for you, Y/N, better yet, I won’t. If you really want to recover you must make these decisions of your own free will. And sometimes we need to cut ties so we can cross the bridge.

So you could cross the bridge. Yeah, you had been swaying over a broken-down bridge all your life, and behind you was all the things that you were so desperate to get away from, before you Lilia awaited with a bright light, no, with blue skies and sunlight all around her. The pad of you fingers tapped on the block, accepting the next step before deleting all her calls from your log. A weight had lifted from your chest, and even though you felt a slight sadness you knew that the happiness that you were going to build with your own two hands would be the most rewarding thing you had ever done in your life. Lifting your head you felt your heart leap in your chest at her smile, the way it shone with pride, her eyes glowing with love as she pulled your face closer to hers, her lips pecking yours. Parting, she wrapped her arms around your frame, not bothered by your messy hair or stained clothes.    

-A step in the right direction. I’m so proud of you. Why don’t we go home and enjoy a celebratory dinner? We can clean this up tomorrow.

-Can we… can we stay like this for one more minute?

-We can stay like this all night.

[mandy-asimp]

When She Calls

Lilia Calderu x Life!reader (she/her)

Warnings: language, deaths, sprinkles of angst, fluff, smut (but that's for waaay down the build up), whole lotta friendship, I'm like 87% sure that's it

Summary: when Life is asked to make a promise, she doesn't seem to be able to say no. But that promise was going to be served out so much longer than what she could see.

Chapter 3

Story masterlist

chapter 4

The ‘coven’ was asleep around the burnt out fire. Life sat watching over them, knowing sleep wasn’t a concept she was fond of in human form. When she was a cat it was so much better to be able to curl up in Lilia’s arms. Letting her pull her close and into her comfort, but now she could only sit in the closest tree and just watch divination witch struggle to actually sleep. How her arm kept reaching out to grab something..someone. 

“You know, if I had known you were going to hide as a familiar, I would’ve forced you with me so much more. I thought you would have been hiding somewhere so much more interesting.” Rio had managed her way into the tree as well. Sitting on a different branch that gave her a clear shot of Agatha, who picked away from everyone to rest. “Four hundred-fifty some years you were hiding as a cat.”

Life hummed, in this moment she was no different from Rio again. A natural order of all beings. “I made a promise. I was very close with Maestra. I had worked closely with her coven. Left to continue benign life herself, and then you met Agatha. Taking more than I could give, it was exhausting.”

“You think death isn’t?” She turned to look at the other, getting those gray eyes to roll. “No seriously, I’m always working, always having someone to clean up.”

“I didn’t say your part wasn’t hard, but you enjoy it. Especially when it meant you gotta see her. She gave you so much, and you took the one thing she loved more than anything.” Life threw back, eyes drifting back to the sleeping group. “And when she woke up, that boy was gone and so was her heart.”

Rio stayed silent for a moment, head hanging in sadness almost. “I gave her the time I could. You…you could’ve done more. She begged you to do more. Cried for you to save him.”

“Please, my love!” Young Agatha shouted through the trees to a sweeter version of Rio. Her cheeks rosy red from the excruciating pain of birth. But Rio stood there, a small frown filling her silence. Then the blue eyes searched for that sudden warmth that surrounded. “Please Life! Let me have him! Please! I deserve this, I made him from nothing! Please Life!” Tears flowed uncontrollably down her face.

Life was present now. Her white medieval princess dress flowed around her. She stood on the other side, being able to see both women gaze at her with pleading hope. Her eyes like ashes of a fire, holding the remnants of something once bright, just stared sadly. 

Rio’s own frown grew. “I can only give you time.” She concluded, eyes stinging with tears as Life began to walk away. She scoffed at her counterpart, realizing that no matter what, Life was always going to be unfair. The young being couldn't help but follow right after. “You’re a coward Life! Scared of bending the rules every time. You can never have genuine emotions if you can't even make connections with the lives you give!”

“You…know nothing of what I feel for the lives that you take from me. You know nothing of the grieving I have to feel when watching them helplessly stand over a dead carcass and look at me first and ask ‘that's my entire life?’ Right before you come in and scoop them up without blinking. So if there is anyone here who can’t show any real connection, it's you Rio. Agatha will hate you for what you’ve done. She will loathe you for the rest of her life until she finally gives in. And even then…you won't have her.” Hot tears were rolling down her face as each word was another stab. “You will learn the hard way for what you’ve chosen.”

“So what, you're just going to give up being in the order?! You’re just going to go hide again and ignore what you’re on this earth to be?!” Rio was lashing out, they both knew it, but she couldn’t stand the other sometimes. “You’re so unfair each and every time!”

It stopped the pale woman in her tracks. She tensed and slowly turned to face Rio. Eyes nothing but a terrible storm that was going to take everything in its path. “Yeah…yeah lifes unfucking fair. But it always ends with death…doesn’t it?”

That was the very last time Death ever saw Life.

“It was never meant to be in her life. A child. I gave him the possibility because I could tell how hard she worked…but like every other life I create, I saw how it was going to end. You gave her special treatment.” Life’s voice was played into a mere whisper. “And look where it got us…dragged onto whatever the hell this Road is.”

Brown eyes stared out into the eternal night. “How’d you know him? He mentioned you once after..”

“You think that boy was going to understand why you, Death herself, who was very much involved in his life, was taking him away at night? He always knew who you were, Rio. I told him the very moment he could process anything. I told him everything over the span of a few years. He was never oblivious to you or her.” Life let the confession pour out of her. Her eyes were trained onto the sleeping witches. Tears brimming her eyes at the memories of the boy. 

They sat in silence as Life cried silently, and Death did too. In some way, seeing each other on a humane level. Feeling every emotion that could possibly radiate from the other. It was suffocating honestly. Neither knew that together they could curate such an environment. Nor did they know it's affecting the actual witches below them.

It wasn’t till Lilia began stirring, then Alice and Jen, Teen and Agatha had begun crying while seemingly confused by the tears. But soon all of them were crying as they woke up more. 

Alice had touched her cheek, her tears managed to spill over like she was sobbing. “What..what’s happening?” She felt choked on her sobs, looking at the other two who were shedding tears just as fast. 

Teen came running over, wiping his cheeks continuously. “Ok, thank god it's not just me!” He felt relieved to not be the only one overwhelmed by this unknown feeling. “Is this normal for The Road? Like the ultimate emotions test?” His eyes snapped to Agatha who had just come back over. 

She shook her head and furiously was wiping the tears, hating this look on herself. “No! I don’t know what this is!” Her blue eyes were growing more red as the tears kept going. Agatha turned to Lilia for some explanation, but she was only silently accepting the tears. 

“Where's Rio and the other one?” Jen had swallowed down the lump in her throat. Everyone turned around, searching where they could see. Which..with the persistent tears it was impossible to see anything.

“Dolcezza…” Lilia so softly mumbled. A sob falling from her lips before she could contain it. Life was there in an instant. Standing right in front of her and wiping away the tears herself. Her warm hands were inviting on Lilia’s cheeks. A gaze that's lost between guilt and sorrow stared at the woman. “Do-”

“I’m sorry…that shouldn’t have happened.” Was all Life could manage before pulling back and leaving Lilia to feel cold and abandoned, but she’d remember that warmth forever.

Rio was back suddenly as well. “Woah…did you all watch A Dog’s Purpose or something?” She cracked the joke without hesitation. Getting a disapproving look from the blonde.

It all was abruptly over though. Once Rio and the cat appeared, nobody was still crying. Just tear stained cheeks as they stood silently and tried to figure out if they were going to ignore it, or discuss it. A ragged cry, echoing through the void however, told them they would not be discussing it. 

“The Seven…they’re here. We left the passage open.” Lilia had dreamed of them getting in, but it was long forgotten due to the tears. 

“We need to move! Pack up your shit!” Agatha was the first to start moving, the ‘coven’ close behind her.

Although, their plan to keep running forward didn't work so well. The Salem Seven had surrounded them on every side and were closing in surely. They needed some escape and it was Teen who had suggested brooms. Earning groans and protest for anything else, yet they stopped when he asked for anyone else’s plan. And with a howl less than a mile away they had no choice. Everyone began grabbing and tearing up large roots to make someone a broom. What they forgot to consider was the uneven number in the group. 

Life stood broomless and with the knocked out owl mere steps away, they had to think quickly. “Ride with me.” Lilia was instant with the offer, even though it sounded like a demand almost. 

“You both wont fit on that broom,” Jen pointed at the limited space to even sit. “I say we leave the mystery shapeshifter!”

“No!” Lilia and Teen shot down right away. 

“Turn into that kitty you were for all those years,” Agatha was being serious, but there was teasing behind her words. Along with behind her eyes.

Life nodded, walked behind the boy who stood taller than her, and came back around as the fluff ball. Hoping carefully onto Lilia’s back as they all began taking off. 

It felt familiar, actually. Life perched between the witch’s arms as she directed the broom through the air and laughed. How the wind blew threw her curls and through the cat's fur. Both sat up a little more to really feel it all. They had flown so much when she was younger. She was so careless before…

“I’m sorry dolcezza…” Lilia’s voice was quiet and hushed. Meant to be just for the cat to hear her. “I shouldn’t have been so harsh on you.” A hand left from holding the wood to running through the calming silk fur. Feeling the warmth she was used to for so long, it wasn’t as warm as her hands were earlier though. “I guess the thought of my familiar not being just a familiar confused me. I didn’t know what to make of it or the fact you know those two.”

“Meow.”

“Your meows really do mean more than what I understand, don't they?”

“Meow,” it was a clear yes. Lilia knew what a few did mean and sound like. 

“But…if your story was true, and you’ve known Rio for as long as you can remember, and then met Agatha on her own…how old does that make you? Assuming they were two separate times?” Lilia was always so bright. Life always knew that about her, sometimes even thinking she actually did figure out her familiar wasn’t that.

Yet, it seemed like a recurring pattern. When the biggest questions were asked, it always was something to intervene in the answer. The Road was nowhere near subtle by any means. It honestly felt like a teenager always avoiding the truths.

~

Chapter 5. (Happy Friday! Enjoy double chapter today!!)