#Phillip: that’s great honey

[shit-sorry-fuck-mybad]

I like to think that Phillip is just not interested in Blanc’s job? Like… obviously he thinks that it’s a cool job and it must be interesting but he’s just not very interested in whatever it is that he does, he loves hearing Benoit talk about his cases because he loves seeing him get all exited but that’s where it stops, it’s not the stories that amaze him, it’s Benoit and his immense passion for his profession, the pure pleasure that it gives him to solve a case, the way he dedicates himself to helping other people, that’s what Phillip cares about

[homosociallyyours]

.

[almostfoxglove]

hello sweet friends! tis the season for spreading the love, so I thought I'd round up some of the fics I've been loving lately, in case you're in need of a little reading during the holidays <3 make sure to give these writers some love!!

💖 - fluff | 🔥 - smut | 😭 - angst | ⭐ - one shot | ✨ - series

that feet-kickin', hallmark goodness

law of attraction by @baronessvonglitter - dave york x f!reader ✨💖😭🔥

foxglove downs by @whocaresstillthelouvre - marcus acacius x f!reader, lucius x f!reader ✨💖🔥

loopholes by @yxtkiwiyxt - joel miller x f!reader ✨💖😭🔥

a christmas miracle by @punkshort - joel miller x f!reader ⭐💖🔥

crazy on you by @goodwithcheese - joel miller x f!reader ✨💖🔥

I've seen this one; it's a tragedy by @youvebeenlivingfictional - marcus pike x f!reader ⭐💖😭

if they update, I run

I'll never get out of this world alive by kiwicane (ao3) - joel miller x f!reader ✨😭

passenger by @whatsnewalycat - din djarin x ofc ✨😭🔥

howdy honey by @joelmillerisapunk - joel miller x f!reader ✨💖🔥

the roommate agreement by @auteurdelabre - max phillips x f!reader ✨😭🔥

the savage and the sanctuary by @justagalwhowrites - joel miller x f!reader ✨😭

unscripted desire by @gothcsz - javier peña x f!reader ✨🔥💖😭

do not open in front of family

you call and I come running by @chronically-ghosted - javier peña x f!reader ⭐🔥

sleazy santa by @morallyinept - dieter bravo x f!reader ⭐🔥

colosseum capers by @beefrobeefcal - dieter bravo x f!reader x din djarin ⭐🔥

blood favor by @pedgito - marcus acacius x f!reader ⭐😭🔥

smooth operator by @penascigarette - joel miller x f!reader ✨💖🔥

take me to church by @frannyzooey - din djarin x f!reader ✨🔥💖😭

fourth time's a charm by @jolapeno - lucien de leon x f!reader ⭐😭🔥

keeping me awake at night

warm hands, cold heart by @secretelephanttattoo - max phillips x ofc ⭐😭🔥(not to be dramatic but this fic made me want to make a new rec list)

difficult by @schnarfer - joel miller x f!reader ⭐💖😭🔥

the way to a great wide somewhere by @myownwholewildworld - din djarin x f!reader ⭐😭🔥

ain't shit sweeter by @encasedinobsidian - javier peña x f!reader ✨🔥😭

the road not taken by @guiltyasdave - dave york x f!reader ⭐😭

dividers by @thecutestgrotto

[jillraggett]

Plant of the Day

Wednesday 27 March 2024

These clumps of the newly emerging foliage of Euphorbia × pasteurii 'John Phillips' (spurge) were creating a great contrast with the finely textured grasses. From late spring into summer honey-scented, yellow-green flowers will be produced.

Jill Raggett

[internetminestrone]

The 27th

A/N - I used to write all the time but I never posted. Now I also never write lol. So this is a cute snapshot piece to encourage me to do more of both.

Here’s to the great tumblr writers for the inspiration to imagine and share a “Henry” of my very own. @ellethespaceunicorn @littlefreya @sillyrabbit81 @shellyshellshell @peyton-warren and so many more. If you’re a Henry girlie like me or just a fun-fanfic girlie (also like me), read, comment on, and reblog everything they’ve got :)

Summary - You [Rose] have had a day and he [Henry] is there.

Word Count - 1550ish

Warnings - Fluff. Workaholic-ing.

“Oh for heaven’s sake”. As if the day couldn’t get any better, the second you stepped out of your car - a car which you had spent the last hour inside thanks to stand-still traffic - the sky opened up, and released the nasty kind of rain that only happened during a summer storm.

Conveniently - in your hurry to escape the office, you had forgotten your umbrella, and of course, the parking space right in front of your townhouse had been taken, so you had to park six houses down. Fantastic.

Clutching your bag close to your body with one hand, and the other shielding your eyes from the rain, you made a mad dash towards your front door. It was lucky, really, that you made it there, and up the steps without incident. But, standing there realizing you’d left your keys in your car was the last straw.

You began to laugh. Mouth open wide, eyes shut tight, laughing harder than you had in a long time. Because, really, who the hell cares and also - you’ve had a hell of a day. Nobody could see you, standing out here looking utterly maniacal. It had been a day that’s for sure, and now, this was as low as you could get.

“Rose, honey?”

You nearly jumped out of your skin at the sound of the door opening, and there, his large frame, cloaked by the light of your living room, was your boyfriend, looking positively bewildered at the scene - as he should be, you did look unhinged at best - but also …

“Henry?” Your brow furrowed, “What are you doing here?” 

“What am I doing here?” he cocked an eyebrow at you and his hazel eyes flashed wide. “Hon, I got here at six.”

Six? Got here at six, why on earth would he have - oh. Shoot. Shoot. “It’s the 27th?!” Your face tightened and you brought your palm to your forehead as the realization struck you like a load of bricks to the face.

“I know, I know. I texted you around lunch to remind you.” He said his shoulders lifted lightly into a casual shrug. He must’ve been reading, he still had his glasses on. Here he had been, reading and waiting up for you. How horrible!

“My phone died after my 10am meeting, and my charger decided today was the day to crap out on me.” You said, with enthusiastic gestures of your hands. “I mean, seriously, and then it was just back to back all day and then I was trying to leave but Sandra needed help on the Phillips-Miller account, and I had to track this thing down for Doug, and well. Now, it’s- what time is it?”

“8:45” Henry replied, relaxing against the doorframe as he held the door ajar. 

“8:45. Well, really 7:30 but then there was all this traffic because of the work they’re doing on the North side which I forgot about. And then I get here, and it’s suddenly raining-”

“And it’s still raining, so why don’t we come inside.” 

“- It’s raining and my umbrella, I can just picture it in the office right next to the coat hook,” You said, turning to point back towards your car briefly and then was back to him, “and my parking spot was taken so I had to park way down there and I-”

“Hey Rose?”

You took a big gulp of air, mid sentence as you continued, “- I just had to run over here to try not to get so wet, and then I get here , and my keys are just-”

Then his warm hands were clasping yours and slowly, yet forcibly, pulling you into the warmth and bright hospitable light of your home. You were silenced - stunned to silence rather. He pulled you into his chest, to get you clear of the swing of the door as he closed it behind you.

The soft cotton of his shirt felt heavenly against your face, even if just for a second before he pivoted you again, towards the easy chair in the corner and sat you down - taking your bag from you and placing it carefully on the floor, then removing your glasses and putting them on the table besides you, before gently getting on his knees and reaching for your drenched shoes, sliding them off one after the other.

“I’m sorry” You whispered quietly through chattering teeth, the dampness of the rain had chilled you to the core, the feeling crept from your soaked hair down your spine. 

“For what?” Henry asked, standing to nab a blanket out of the basket near the windows. 

“For -'' You paused, considering. “I could’ve asked someone for a charger.” You finally replied, watching him select the warmest blanket of the bunch and step back towards you.  

“I could’ve called your work number.” He said, bundling you up tight with a smile. “But I didn’t.” He stood and crossed over behind the couch into the kitchen. “Rosehip or Chamomile?”

“Yeah, you could've.” You rolled your eyes. “But why would you have?! You never call my work phone.”

“But if I really needed to get a hold of you I could’ve. Rosehip or Chamomile?” He grabbed two mugs and the electric kettle from the cabinet by the fridge; set the mugs down and walked to the sink to fill the kettle up.

“Then you should’ve!”

“But I didn’t. Rose, pay attention here, what kind of tea would you like?” He said holding up the two options so that you could see, weighing them back and forth in his hands.

“You should’ve.” You said slumping in your chair. “Seriously.”

“Okay,” He said, rolling his eyes, “We’ll have chamomile, my second favorite. And seriously, it’s not that big of a deal.” Henry put the carton of Rosehip tea away, plucked out two Chamomile tea bags from the box, placing one in each mug.

“But you should’ve called my work phone!” You grumbled, loudly in his direction.

“Rose.” His voice was calm, yet firm. “I could’ve done that. I didn’t. Me not doing that isn’t something you are now responsible for.”

You pulled the blanket tighter and brought your feet up on the chair. Sometimes bad days only get worse. You let your head fall into your blanketed knees in front of you. “I feel terrible, I ruined your day. Maybe even your -.”

“You didn’t ruin my day.” he said, clicking on the kettle and walking back over to you. “When I got here and saw you were still at work, I called it off. We were going to be early anyway, so there was plenty of time to let them know, and also it really wasn’t that big of a deal.” He sat in the chair next to you, and carefully reached across to tug your feet into his lap. “So I came in and decided to stay awhile. If you weren’t home by 9:30 I was going to drive up and get you.” The feeling of his hands on your feet, your sore and frozen feet, felt like magic.

“Now you really didn’t need to think about doing that '' You mumbled, feeling little bits of your stress melt away as his thumbs kneaded into the ball of your left foot.

“I hate it when you drive home so late. Ugh, it makes me nervous.” Henry said shuttering. He put your left foot down carefully in his lap, and picked up your right.

“Nothing would’ve happened! Nothing ever happens, I’m a good driver and I always have Stan to walk me to my car if I need to.” You protested, toes folding as Henry skimmed a ticklish spot in the crevice next to your big toe.

“Not yet it hasn’t. I’ve got the time, I can drive you when it gets late, that way you can rest on the way home.”

“Nothing-” You began, the pitch of your voice rose indignantly.

“No no no. We’re not playing this game again. Case and point. It’s not even 9:15 and you’re exhausted.”

You meant to say “no I’m not”, but instead you let out a massive and loud yawn, and your eyes fluttered, suddenly feeling heavy. You re-adjusted the blanket around you again, pulling it practically up to your nose. Henry chuckled. “Yeah. Exactly.”

He moved your feet out of the way as he stood, extending his arms out straight above his head, and tilting side to side to crack his back. Then he walked over towards the whistling kettle, and said, “Why don’t you get those wet clothes off and hop in the shower while I heat up something to eat.”

“You don’t have to do that.” You replied somberly.

“I want to.” he said, then eyes sparkling, he added, “You’re making me cold, looking at you all bundled up over there with your wet clothes and wet hair and wet socks.”

“okay” You groaned, getting to your feet. He was right of course. You were positively soaked, and the blanket was nice, but also like putting scotch tape on the Hoover Dam. Not entirely helpful.

You slid your feet one at a time, across the hardwood floor and into the kitchen where Henry waited for you with your warm mug of Chamomile tea. “Take this with you” he said, depositing the deliciously hot cup in your hands. “It will heat you up while you get the shower running.”

“Can’t I take you with me?” you said cheekily, fighting a grin. “To heat me up even when the shower’s running?”

Henry’s mouth fell open in mock surprise and chuckled, then took a few fast steps towards you, prompting you to skitter away towards the stairs giggling all the way. “Don’t tempt me with a good time baby.” he called after you, all smiles. 

[absurdthirst]

Crossing Enemy Lines {Max Phillips x F!Reader}

Rating: Explicit

Word Count: 10.1k

Warnings: Insults, vampirism, mentions of blood drinking, oral sex (male and female receiving), rough sex, crude humor, Max being Max, angst.

Comments: Competitors and enemies? You are both not the other's favorite person but for some reason, hate sex is great sex.

Co-written @storiesofthefandomlovers

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|| MasterList || Max Phillips MasterList ||

Click Keep Reading only if you have read the Rating and Warnings and understand the warnings may not be complete to avoid listing spoilers. As AO3 says 'creator chooses not to use warnings'. You also agree that you're the right age to be consuming anything here.

Max adjusts his tie as he strides into the conference. A new annual event for vampires who are in business. As the branch manager, he received his invitation to the conference last month and he’s been excited to dominate the scene. Especially after he heard you’d be coming too. Grabbing his badge, Max makes his way into the welcome event and that’s when he sees you. Red dress, professional yet just the right amount of tight to be sexy, and he smirks as he makes his way over to you. “Fancy seeing you here, sweetheart.” Max winks at you as he strides over to you. 

“Phillips.” You greet him coolly, “I’m surprised you’re here. I thought they had a separate conference for subpar regional branch managers who always fail to meet their quarterly quota.” You smirk, eying Max in his red tie and what he claims is a bespoke suit.

His smile falters for a split second before it’s back, more powerful than before and the sharpness in his eyes focuses on you. “I was surprised that you were invited too, sweetheart.” He reaches up and tightens the full windsor knot of his Hermès tie. The gold thumb ring and Rolex match the tie clasp, all coordinated with the cufflinks that wink at his wrists. Dramatic, but Max likes to dress for the job he wants, not the job he has. “I’m sure you’ll get those numbers up.” 

“Is that what your credit card companies ask for when you’re late on the minimum payment?” You retort, noticing what he is so desperate to show off about. “Oh honey, you’ll pay them off. You just need some more sales…oh wait…I’m not going to allow you to encroach on my clients. You’ll just have to tell those credit cards you can’t pay for those fancy cufflinks.” You click your tongue, reaching out to adjust his tie to just a hair off of being perfect.

Max hisses slightly, annoyed that you had messed with the lines of his tie. “Is that what you believe?” He bats your hand away, lifting a brow as he fixes the tie again and reaches out to flick his finger under your ear lobe. “The Moissanite is nice, but it doesn’t have the sparkle of a real diamond.” He chuckles. “I understand though. If I lost the Phalicite contract to another firm, I wouldn’t be splurging either. Oh right….I was that firm.” He boasts quietly. “What was it they said? She just couldn’t get it done?” He tuts, giving you a disappointed look before he gives a small shrug. “They are happy now.”

You bite down the growl that tries to escape from his jab. It pained you to lose that contract and you shake your head, letting out an unamused chuckle. “You might’ve won the battle, big shot, but I will win the war.” You pat his chest, “now it’s time to network big boy. May the best woman win.” You wink, striding off to meet the CEO of that company you’ve been trying to close for months.

Max watches you walk away, his eyes firmly glued to your ass. You are a pain in the ass, but you have a fantastic one, so he lets you get away with more than someone else could. Deciding that it’s war, he plasters on his most charming persona and starts working the room, eager to one up you on connections and leads for new business. You are competition and he loves a challenge.

By the time you’re done charming the hell out of most of the big wigs in the room, a lot of them spent far too long eying your cleavage. You lean against the bar, desperate for a drink. Thank God you can still get drunk from alcohol. Even if it takes more, you still get the effects. You gesture for the bartender to come over and order yourself a gin martini. “Two olives.” You add and the bartender gives you an odd look but goes ahead to pour your drink. When you have the drink, you take a much needed sip until his voice invades your ears again. 

“Olives? What you gonna do? Eat them?” Max snorts, gesturing for the bartender to come over. He orders a whiskey on the rocks and you turn to look at him. 

“I like the aesthetic.” You explain with a brief shrug.

“Aesthetic.” Max scoffs and shakes his head. “Why pretend to be human when we are so much better?” He asks, tapping his finger on the bar as he waits for his drink. “Name one thing that a human is better at, I’ll wait.”

“Sex.” You answer Max and he chuckles, thinking you’re joking. 

“Seriously? Why the fuck would you think that? They have to breathe, they need breaks. They can’t keep going all night long.” 

You snort, “exactly. Humans have enthusiasm. They have passion. It’s not perfect, it can be sloppy, but any human lover I’ve had has been one hundred percent into fucking me. Vampires are cold, emotionless. It’s just an act, physical pleasure. There’s no emotion behind it, not even lust really. We are heartless machines and that - the lack of compassion - makes us great in sales and boring in bed.”

Max snorts, sending you a pitying look. “Just because you choose bad lovers doesn’t mean that vampires as a whole are bad in bed.” Smirking he points at himself. “Take me for example, by the time I’m done, you will be as exhausted as a vampire can get, begging for a break from the orgasms and pleasure. Humans don’t stand a chance.” He boasts.

You roll your eyes after taking a sip of your drink. “Sure Phillips. Is that what they tell you? After you buy them the Louis Vuitton purse you can’t afford?” You snort, “I highly doubt you have someone begging for a break. Maybe a break from you, not your cock.”

Max is cocky, maybe a little too much sometimes but he knows how to fuck. He ignores the little insult towards his finances, he’s well aware of his bank balance and smirks as he leans in. “Only one way to find out, sweet cheeks.” He challenges. “I could give you testimonies from past lovers, or I could just let you experience Maxie boy for yourself.”

You roll your eyes, “you called my pussy the arctic circle and said that any man who dares to venture into it would surely freeze to death. So, you got some mittens?” You smirk, deciding to mess with him. “Or perhaps you can borrow some fuzzy socks from one of your pals over there.” You gesture to the group of vampires who are just like Max: egotistical and beyond cocky. You lean closer to Max, grabbing his tie to bring him closer and you brush your lips against his ear, “or you can go fuck yourself.” You smirk, leaning back to grab your drink, you down it and order another one from the bartender.

Max grunts, unable to believe that you just made his cock twitch with the breathless way you had told him to go fuck himself. He’s always like ballsy women and despite the professional rivalry, you are just his type. “If you can’t handle the idea of having a real man fuck you, that’s all you have to say, sweetheart.” Max coos, reaching out and sliding his index finger down your arm. “Stick with the blood bags who can’t bury their face in the Arctic circle until it’s hotter than a furnace without coming up for air. No skin off my teeth.”

You raise an eyebrow as he orders another whiskey. You glance around the bush room, the endless chatter almost melding into one noise. “I want to know something.” You announce after the bartender sets your drinks down. 

“Shoot.” Max says before sipping his double whiskey. 

“Why do you want to fuck me? I thought we hated each other?” You lean against the bar, showing him more of your cleavage. 

Max snorts, “hate fucking can be the best sex ever.” He admits with a shrug and your heart sinks a little that he actually does hate you so much despite you just doing your job. 

Yes, you’ve goaded him but to hear it confirmed, it takes you back for a moment. “Here’s a proposal-” 

Max interrupts you, “oh I didn’t say marriage-” 

You roll your eyes again, “an offer.” You amend and he hums, “if you still want to fuck me by the end of this event, come to my room��1012. If you still want to fuck me, you can come to mine and I want you to spend the entire night making me cum. If you can’t do that, don’t come. If you don’t want that, I understand. Now, there’s the CEO for HP. I think we have a deal in the works. Thanks for the drinks, Phillips.” You wink and stride off, leaving him with the tab.

It’s fucking hard to concentrate on business for the rest of the night. To socialize and pretend he’s not discreetly checking his Rolex and glancing around the ball room to see where you are in proximity to him. Even the cute little redheaded human who flirts with him doesn’t capture his interest, and he always likes the taste of redheads - very mellow. The idea of fucking the attitude and sarcasm out of you is almost as intoxicating at the four other whiskeys he drinks. Another plus of being the undead is that he doesn’t have to worry about alcohol affecting his performance in bed. When the clock strikes midnight, the official ending time for the event, Max looks around to see that you’ve disappeared. Making him smirk as he tosses back the rest of his whiskey and make his apologies before he leaves, foregoing the elevator and speeding up the stairs to the tenth floor. Pausing outside of room 1012 to adjust his hair and straighten his tie before he knocks.

You check your hair in the mirror, freaking out a little despite the drinks you’ve had. It’s hard to believe that Max Phillips is about to fuck you but you don’t try to think too much about what happens tomorrow morning when you open the door to Max Phillips, naked and waiting for his reaction. There was no point staying dressed. This saves time and as a manager, you’re all about time management. “You ready?” You ask him, chuckling at the dumbstruck look on his face.

“Jesus sweetheart.” Max manages after he stops staring. He sweeps into the room, “if you were that eager, we should have done this a long time ago.” He reaches down and unbuttons the jacket of his suit and shrugs it off to drape over a chair. He smirks and grabs your waist to step close to you. “Now, do I make you scream my name on my cock or my tongue first?”

“Eager? You wish, Phillips. I’m just efficient. Take your clothes off too. Wanna see if your ego is backed up by what you’re packing.” You reach for his tie, pulling him closer so you can press your lips to his while his hands dig into your waist.

His cock twitches, already hardening just at the sight of you and he knows he won’t disappoint you size wise. His tongue slides into your mouth and he groans when you bite it before soothing it slightly. “Dirty girl.” He hisses, smirking happily when one hand slides up to squeeze your breast harshly and pinch your nipple, pulling down on it. “You want a striptease and denied me the same show.”

“I didn’t say I wanted a striptease, Phillips.” You chuckle, working on pulling off that ridiculously expensive tie. “I just wanted to surprise you.” You admit, moaning when he kisses along your neck while you work on unbuttoning his shirt.

“I was surprised.” Max pants, pinching your nipple again and biting down on your shoulder as he slides his hand down to grab your ass. His cock is tenting his suit trousers and he pushes it up against your hip. “Very happily surprised. You’d get a shit ton more sales if you just worked naked.”

You chuckle dryly, “I want to get sales based on my skills, not my tits. Otherwise I’d be like those girls from Chimtech. Just sleeping their way up the ladder. I’m not like that.” You tell him truthfully, reaching down to undo his cufflinks, tossing them onto the coffee table with accuracy, and you push his shirt off of his shoulders.

Max knows that. You are one of the few that he’s hadn’t seen at any of the clubs or honorable mentions at the orgies. It was one of the things that had caught his attention with you. He unbuttons his trousers and grins at you. “Ready?”

You roll your eyes and step away from him to sit on the bed, giving him an expectant look as he pulls down the zipper, opening his pants and shoving them down along with his designer boxers. You swallow harshly at the sight of his hard cock, thick and fucking gorgeous. No wonder he’s such a cocky motherfucker. “Fuck me.” You blurt out, surprised by the monster he has in his pants.

Max’s brow twitches and he sends you a cocky smirk. “Oh I’m going to sweetheart.” He promises as he kicks his pants off and bends down to peel his socks off to fling aside. His cock bobs heavily and he stands straight and wraps his hand around it to stroke. “Spread your legs, baby. I want to see the Arctic circle before I visit.”

You roll your eyes against his words, “you’re an asshole.” Yet you follow his order, shifting to sit back against the pillows and you slowly, with a smirk, spread your legs to display your cunt to his hungry gaze. You tease, caressing your thighs, “you gonna keep me waiting, Phillips?”

“Fuck, you have a pretty cunt.” Max groans, squeezing himself lightly before he lets go. “Bet you taste good.” His mouth waters at the idea and his fangs start to descend before he catches himself. He knows he wouldn’t want fangs against his cock so he wouldn’t do that to a lover. He stalks over to the bed and pushes you back before he drops to his knees, smirking and winking at you before he dives in. 

You gasp when his tongue slides between your folds and you reach down to tangle your fingers in his hair. “Oh you son of a bitch.” You hiss when he flicks his tongue expertly over your clit. You can’t believe how good he is already. He has already worked you up more than most lovers can during an entire night and the bastard has done it within thirty seconds.

Max chuckles into your cunt but he doesn’t stop. He eats you voraciously. Like you are the best goddamn thing that he’s ever tasted and if he pulls away your cunt would disappear. There’s nothing polite about it. No gentle licks or soulless sucks on your clit. It’s sloppy, messy and fucking pure Heaven for him. Loving the sounds you make while he repeatedly curls his tongue up inside your walls, shakes his head so his squashed nose stimulates your clit. He loves not having to breathe to eat a woman out, loves that his jaw doesn’t ache or get tired. He could do it all night if he needed to, even as his cock leaks onto his thighs as he wears your legs as a scarf.

You can’t even speak, your mouth falling open and fangs threatening to poke through as Max rocks your world. Your thighs press against his cheeks, suffocating him and you would’ve killed a human by now but Max isn’t human and he doesn’t need to breathe. His tongue is curled so deep and combined with that aquiline nose, you are close to your orgasm. “Oh fuck!” You squeal when you squeeze your tits, the added stimulation sending you over the edge and you curse Max for being so fucking good at that.

Max growls into you, licking and sucking up your release and working you through the orgasm before his tongue turns softer. Gently fluttering against your clit before he kisses it and gives you a self-satisfied smirk. “That was one, sweetheart.” He coos. “Ready for another or do you want to experience the ‘main event’?”

You can’t even offer him a smart retort as you recover from the way his tongue made you cum harder than you have in years. “Shit Max. The amount of bullshit that comes out of your mouth and yet it can do that. Fuck. I- main event? You are done already?” You tease, reaching down to rub your over sensitive clit.

Max snorts, aware that you are goading him but he’s going to make you eat your words. Smirking, he uses his inhuman strength to easily flip you into your stomach and yanks your hips up. Burying his face back into your cunt from behind. 

Your cry echoes off of the wall and you nearly rip the sheets as your fingers curl into them while Max’s tongue slides back into your sensitive cunt. “Oh fuck baby.” You gasp out, falling forward onto your forearms and arching your back as his nose presses against your puckered hole. You whimper when his fingers slide under you to rub your clit. “Max. Oh God, right there. Fuck. Yes. There.” You moan when his fingers curl and he finds that spot that makes your thighs shake. “That - that’s it baby. That’s it. Right there.” You whine until it turns into a loud moan as you cum for the second time, gushing over his tongue and chin.

He hums, keeping his tongue and fingers moving as your hips rock back in his face. He loves that you are chasing your pleasure and aren’t shy about giving orders. Max might be the boss, a powerhouse at work; but he doesn’t mind taking direction when it means that he will make you scream out his name. Something that will happen before tonight is over. When your thighs stop shaking, Max chuckles and slides his tongue up to circle the other little hole that has captured his attention with all its fluttering and begging for attention.

You gasp when his tongue presses against your puckered hole. “Fuck Max.” You rasp, voice growing hoarse from the moans that have rattled the room. “Get inside of me. Now.” You demand, reaching behind you to tug on his hair, now messy and out of its usual style.

He flicks his tongue against your hole one last time before he moves over and bites your cheek playfully. “What hole do you want me in first?” He teases, sliding his fingers up and down between both. “I think I want the Arctic circle first.” The slap of his hand against your ass is harsh in the room and he chuckles when you moan.

You can’t even bring yourself to roll your eyes as he grips his cock and teases your clit with the head. “Is this how long you take to close all your sales, Phillips?” You taunt, grinding back against him. When he just chuckles and notches his cock at your entrance, pushing into you in one thrust, your clever remark is long forgotten as his cock pushes into you and stretches you out.

“Fuuuuuck.” Max hisses, slapping your ass again as he circles his hips and grinds into you. You feel incredible and he would stay right here for an hour, just feeling your walls pulse around him but then you would complain. Instead, he wrap his arm around your sternum and drags you up before he drops his hips and starts fucking you like a madman.

You pant, gripping his forearm and you don't pull it away as you let him choke you. It's a good thing you don't need to breathe. "Fuck baby. It's-" You moan, leaning back against him as he hammers into you. His hips hitting your ass as he fucks you hard and fast.

Max hums, loving how you are taking his cock. “It’s what? Wonderful? The best you’ve ever had?” He drags his nose up your neck, pressing where he would have felt your pulse if you had one but there is nothing. “I know. I know it’s good baby, this pussy feels amazing. Taking me like this. Letting me fuck you hard…and now even harder.” He ramps up his thrusts to a pace that would kill a human without breaking a sweat or panting. 

The bed squeaks beneath you due to the sheer force of Max's thrusts and he takes your useless breath away. "O-o-h-m-y-G-o-d." You sound out each syllable as he fucks you harder than anyone you've ever had. Your pussy feels like it's being pounded in your guts and you can only let him use your cunt like this. "Maaaax!" You wail as he hammers against something magnificent inside of you.

“There it is.” He hisses, grinning into your neck and nipping your skin playfully. “That’s what I want to hear. Except - louder sweetheart. Gotta let the front desk know who’s fucking you.” The hand not pinning you to him gropes your breast and then slides down to slap your clit. 

His fingers hitting your clit makes you nearly fold over but his grip on your throat keeps you upright. Max has all the control right now but you aren’t mad about it. You kind of love it, the lack of decisions so unlike your work life. This is nothing but pleasure and you love it. “Oh fuck.” You gasp, turning your head as much as you can to try to find his lips.

Max knows what you want and he doesn’t deny you. His cock continues to shred up into your throbbing cunt with devastating accuracy against your g-spot and he slides his tongue into your mouth. Kissing you roughly while the quick slaps of his hips against your ass fill the room. Grinning against your lips when he slaps your pussy again.

You moan into his mouth, unable to help yourself, and when Max grins against your lips, you cry out and clamp down on his cock. Hard. Gripping him in a vice as your thighs shake and your cum soaks his cock. It’s the most violent orgasm you’ve ever had wrack your body and it’s caused by the man you hate.

Max groans out your name, loving how you are soaking him and the bed beneath you. The way you squeeze his cock has him caught up in your walls where he can barely move, grinding up into you while he seeks his own pleasure. Giving a rough half dozen thrusts before he groans again, filling you with a hot flood of his useless seed.

You pant against his mouth, just breathing him in as he rocks into you, pushing his cum out of you onto the sheet below. “Fuck.” You sigh in bliss, just letting the feelings move through your system as Max kisses your neck. “That was - I hate to admit it but it was good.”

Chuckling as he takes both of you down to the bed to lay down, he’s feeling smug as fuck at your fucked out posture. “Good.” He hums, twitching inside you before he pulls out and shuffles so he can watch your cunt drip his cum. “Fuck, I should take a picture.” He jokes, not serious in the least. Even as a vampire, he has some morality. 

You snort, knowing he wouldn’t do it, but you look at him. “So you could show it off to all your work buddies? How you fucked your ice queen rival?” You chuckle dryly, reaching down to push two fingers inside, scooping some of his cum out of your cunt and you shove those fingers in your mouth to taste Max’s cum combined with yours.

Max groans and he watches your tongue flutter around your fingers as you sucks them clean. He grins and his own finger dips into your dripping hole for a taste of his own. “Was thinking more to jerk off to later on.” He winks and licks his finger. “Fuck, you do taste good. Is it the blood you drink?”

You smile, “yeah. I only drink from the rich.” You admit and wink at him, letting him know you’re joking. “I think someone told me once that our taste carries over from when we were human.” You reveal, “so I tasted that good before.” You smirk and nudge him with your foot which he grabs. “So what is this? Are we - ?” You bite your lip. “Fucking?” Max provides and you nod. “Who would’ve thought it? Did you, um, did you enjoy it?” You ask, offering a rare moment of vulnerability.

Max is greedy, sliding his hand up your leg and thigh. “Mhm.” He hums, smiling as he touches you like he’s never been allowed to before. “Dick didn’t freeze off.” He teases playfully. “Definitely not the Arctic circle, it’s warm, tight, fucking gooood.” He reveals honestly before he winks. “Ready to go again?” He asks, waggling his brows. “Did promise to fuck you all night after all.”

You chuckle, moving fast to straddle him, reaching down to grip his still hard cock and you sink down onto it, your combined cum pushed out as you grip his shoulders. “It’s my turn to fuck you Phillips.” You smirk, clenching around him.

“Fucccccckkkk.” Max’s eyes roll back from how quickly you sit on his cock and his fangs do spring down and make him look like the predator he is. His fingers dig into the meat of your hips, right above the thighs and he bucks his hips up. “Fuck me. Ride my cock. Wanna see your tits bounce in my face.”

You reach out to caress one of his fangs with your finger before you cup his cheeks, working your hips to start bouncing on his cock. You shift, tangling your fingers in his stupidly thick hair and your tits bounce in his face as you ride his cock hard and fast.

He’s in fucking Heaven. Keeping his fangs away from your flesh, he captures a nipple to suck on while you ride him. Groaning into your tits and lavishing them with attention while his cock twitches every time you yank on his hair. Humans never do it hard enough and most vampires try to yank it out. Your pressure on his scalp is perfect. “Fuck.”

"You're such a dick but your cock is so good." You compliment him and insult him at the same time. "Fuck Max." You pant, grinding your hips to push his cock deeper and you are grateful your thighs won't ache as you rock on his cock like he's a prize stallion.

“Ride it.” Max growls, grinning at the fight you put up but your cunt is soaking wet around him. “That pretty little cunt likes my big dick inside it, doesn’t she?” He coos, thrusting his hips up. “Wanna ride it all the time now, dontcha?”

You want to roll your eyes at his words, cringeworthy if you were sober and not currently sitting on his cock. You slam down onto his cock, "you wanna be inside of this pussy all the time now, dontcha?" You taunt back, tugging on his hair to tilt his head back so you can lick along his neck.

There’s a distinct, needy whine that pours out of Max’s throat while you clench around him and lick his skin. “Shit yes.” He chokes out. “Work while I’m inside you. Have you sit on my cock while we- we fucking make money.” His fingers dig into your hips even harder and he lifts you up and pulls you back down on his cock just as harshly as you had, groaning again.

You throw your head back when he starts to move you on his cock but you won’t let him have control. You push him backwards, grabbing his forearms and pushing them over his head. You are stretched over his body, tits swaying in his face as you start to ride his cock, grinding back onto it while you restrain him as much as you’re physically able to.

“Fuck.” Max grinds his teeth together, getting your unspoken warning to stay still and he tries to comply. It’s so hard when you feel so fucking good around him. He had never imagined it would feel this good. “Jesus Christ, sweetheart. If my heart pumped you would stop it.” He grunts out.

You giggle breathlessly at his compliment, looking down at those now black eyes, full of lust for you. “Thanks Maxie. Your cock isn’t too bad.” You tease and he makes you cry out when he thrusts up into you. “Oh fuck!” You moan,  especially when he takes your nipple into his mouth again. “Again. You’re gonna make me cum.” You plead, bucking back onto his cock.

Now it’s not a fight for control, it’s just a race for pleasure. Both of you know it’s going to come but you’re greedy. Max obeys your order and bucks up into you, bouncing you on his cock and he nearly chokes with how hard you squeeze him when he hits that magical spot inside your silken walls. “Shit baby, cum. Cum all over my cock. Wanna feel it- wanna-“ he breaks off with a loud moan when you squeeze him again, so close to cumming himself.

Your mouth falls open and nothing comes out as two more thrusts of his hips has you falling over the edge, clamping down on his cock in a way that you are squealing his name when the noise finally breaks free. Soaking him with your cum as you still above him, shaking from the intensity of the orgasm.

Max whimpers, eyes closing and his arms wrap around you. Holding you while he rocks up into you frantically. Chanting your name over and over again for another three thrust before he is pushing deep, wanting to crawl inside you while he fills you up again. Loving the perk of being a vampire and unable to get STDs or cause pregnancy.

“Fuck.” You huff shakily, shifting to look down at him and admire his handsome face, fangs pointing out, and you lean down to lick one playfully with your tongue. “Shit. That was good, baby.” You caress his cheeks and down to his neck and then his chest.

Max smirks, proud of the fact that you are saying that it was good. His strokes your back, your skin still smooth and cool, unable to sweat since you are technically dead. “Still think sex with a vampire isn’t better than a human?” He asks, brow raised and curious as to your answer.

You bite your lip, hating to say no but you can’t deny it when he has made you cum so hard. “Maybe you’re starting to change my mind.” You tease and Max growls, turning you over and playfully biting down on your neck. “So…we, uh, this is it? Just one night.” You say after a moment.

Pulling away so he can look down at you, Max makes a split second decision, reading your tone and the searching look on your face. “Doesn’t have to be.” He hums, running his tongue over his teeth and his fangs retract. “We are both busy, real go-getters.” He muses. “It would make sense that we continue this. Work out our needs, frustrations on each other. Use this great sex we have.” He doesn’t say that he wants it again, but he does. He really does. Fuck, he wants to stay the night. 

You hum, thinking about it for a moment. “I suppose it makes sense to get our…frustrations with each other out in a healthier way. Keep business as business but enjoy our pleasures too.” You sit back to get off of him, flopping down on the bed beside him. “You can’t tell anyone about it though.”

He frowns for a second, not liking the idea of secrecy but then he decides to let that go. “Of course.” He manages a smirk and a shrug by the time you turn your head to look over at him. “Lips are sealed. I’m not going to tell that the Arctic circle is conquerable.” He jokes, winking at you before he sits up. He needs to go back to his own room before he argues about your condition to continue fucking.

You roll your eyes at him before you sit up, glad you don’t ache like you would when you were human. Max probably would’ve killed you with how hard he fucked you. “I guess I’ll see you around, Phillips.” You shuffle off of the bed, anxious for a shower to clean up and he gets up, grabbing his clothes to start dressing. “I’m going to shower. Let yourself out.” You tell him and he nods, watching you make your way to the bathroom door. “Oh by the way, I like that tie.” You inform him with a wink and saunter into the bathroom, leaving him to it.

****

Max smirks when he knocks on your door before just pushing it open. You’ve been sleeping together for nearly three months and he’s just made himself at home with walking into your house when he gets off work. You hold up a finger, still halfway dressed when he knows you would normally be naked, your phone still to your ear. “Jerry, I promise you the projections are wrong.” You tell him, making Max’s smile widen even more. Your stocking are still on and you obviously was interrupted from your task of getting ready for him to fuck you by the business call. Max strides over to you and caresses your hip while you narrow your eyes at him, obviously wanting him to be quiet while you work. Winking, he lowers himself to his knees and shreds the underwear under your garter belt so he can get to your pussy. 

You gasp, “fucking hell” and Jerry asks you what’s wrong. “Nothing Jerry. Nothing. Ma- My tea was hot.” You lie even as Max’s tongue carves a path through your folds. “Fuck you.” You mouth down at Max whose dark eyes are watching you with amusement. You won’t let him win, tangling your fingers in his hair, you force yourself to concentrate on the call, listening to Jerry rattle off numbers. “Jer-Jerry. That’s not right. It’s one hun- oh.” You moan when Max sucks on your clit. Flustered, you clear your throat, “sorry about that Jerry. Tea was delicious.” You manage to lie, continuing to rattle off the numbers despite Max driving you to distraction with his tongue.

Huffing quietly in amusement, Max slides his hands up to massage your ass while he licks into you. Noticing that you have no issue pulling your leg up onto his shoulder while you sag against the counter. Smirking to himself while his tongue licks into you and he shakes his head to brush his nose against your cunt. Fuck, it’s fun to watch your control pull thin, to hear you try to keep your composure while he is unraveling you. 

Max’s tongue slides deep but it’s not enough. You lift your leg onto the counter, giving him more access than before, and he shifts to sit on the floor, wrapping his arm around your leg to keep you stable while his tongue slides deeper. “Fuck.” You hiss, head tilted back to rest against your fridge that’s full of blood bags. 

“What?” Jerry asks and you can barely think with the way Max is destroying your composure. 

“I’m sorry Jerry. I’m gonna have to - to call you back. You have the numbers. Figure it out.” You growl and hang up, tossing your phone on the counter and you reach down to tangle your fingers in Max’s hair, rocking onto his face. “You’re a bastard.” You tell him with a groan.

His laugh is louder now, his hand slapping your ass loud enough that ‘ole Jerry would have heard it if he had still been on the phone. Instead of pulling away and making a snarky comment, he decides he’ll make you cum first. Hearing you cry out is rapidly becoming his favorite fucking thing in the world, better than landing a huge sales contract. Better than beating you. His tongue flicks over your clit and he moves one hand to push three fingers into your cunt while he sucks your clit into his mouth to suck harshly, as if he’s trying to drink from your cunt. 

You decide to give in to the pleasure and not be mad, especially when he is fingering you exactly how you like it. You moan and rock down onto his digits and his face, moaning wantonly at the way he sucks on your clit. “Fuck. I’m gonna cum.” You tell him, “Max. Oh shit. Max. Max. Ma-” You choke, knee buckling as you clamp down around his fingers and soak them with your cum.

Holding you up, Max groans as he works you through it. Loving how his fingers squelch your cum slides down his knuckles. Sucking on your clit until you are whimpering his name and your stomach heaves with overstimulation. His cock is fucking hard as rock but he just kisses your curls and smirks up at you as he pulls is soaked fingers out of your cunt. “Good job, baby.” He coos playfully. “I don’t think he knew you were having your cunt devoured.”

“You’re such an asshole.” You say breathlessly, reaching down to drag him up onto his feet and when he’s standing, you press your lips to his. “Fuck me.” You order, reaching down to squeeze his cock through his pants before you work them open, managing to wrap your fingers around Max’s throbbing cock. “Someone got turned on eating pussy.” You tease, kissing his chin.

Rolling his eyes, he huffs at you. “Duh.” He is throbbing and he knows that just a few strokes of your hand would have him cumming but he wants to fill up that fucking perfect cunt of yours. “Up,” He orders, grabbing your hips and lifting you easily onto the counter with his inhumane strength. Your legs spread easily for him and he loves how soaked you are for him. “Should bend you over and make your ass bounce.” He grumbles, leaning in and pressing his lips to yours while he lines up and sinks inside you. 

You moan into his mouth, gripping his shoulders before you shove your hands under his shirt to caress his back, admiring the strength of his muscles. “You like kissing me too much.” You murmur, crossing the invisible line that neither of you discuss the other’s preferences too much. It makes it more than what it is. Just sex. Max nips your chin, making you moan, and you shift so you are hanging on the edge of the counter, allowing him deeper inside of you.

He does like kissing you. As much as he can. Too much if he were to sit down and think about it, so he doesn’t let himself. You were very clear where he stands and he isn’t fucking this up. Instead, his tongue slides against yours when he presses his lips to yours again, starting a rhythm that has his cock punching deep into your walls, desperate to feel you after hours spent away.

You let him kiss you, especially when his tongue traces your teeth like it always does. It must be his thing. You moan into his mouth, letting his fuck you hard and fast, his hips slamming against your thighs as you shuffle ever so close to falling off of the counter and Max makes you squeal when he grabs your thighs, lifting you up and fucking you on his cock. You squeal and wrap your arms around his neck to stop yourself from falling backwards as he moves your body. “Oh fuck Max.” You moan at this sheer display of his strength.

It’s easy to do, to lift you up as if you weigh nothing. You could do the same to him if you wanted to. It’s the symbolism for him, the way that he can have you any way that he wants to. It’s thrilling. The fact that you let him do whatever he wants and eagerly takes the positions, the pace. You bounce on his cock as he moves you up and down, “fuck, look at that.” He groans, looking between you and watching you take him. Seeing the way your lips stretch around him. “Tell me that’s good, baby. Tell me how much you love my cock.” 

You watch him watching his cock disappear inside of you and you moan his name, “it’s so good baby. So good. I love your cock. Love it. Always - always so good. Making me cum every damn day. I love it. Want you to - to fuck me all day every day if we - if we didn’t have to work.”

“Fuck.” Max hisses, closing his eyes and his fangs spring down at the mere thought. “After- after I get this new job I’ll fuck you every- every day.” He huffs, imagining it clearly. You sitting on his cock while he signs contracts, answering his phone with your pants of pleasure in his ear. He would lay you out on his fucking desk like a feast everyday. 

In a turn of events, your rival businesses are merging and Max is getting a senior position in a separate department to yours. No longer enemies, you and Max are not competing for sales. It’s strange to not be battling him for contracts. Especially when the merger will mean he will be in your building. “Yes. Yes. Every day. I want you to eat me for lunch.” You demand, kissing his neck as you rock down onto his cock, taking over the pace.

“Fuck yes.” Max whines, holding you in his arms and letting you fuck him. Your thighs squeezing him as you lift and lower yourself. “Best fucking lunch. Better than the interns.” He jokes, toes curling in his shoes as you squeeze him with your inner muscles. “Pour some blood on your pussy and pretend you're on the rag.” 

You roll your eyes at his lewd comment but you know that’s just how Max can be. “Fucking weirdo.” You tease, kissing his lips, “you’re such a dick but I- God, I don’t want to stop fucking you. It’s like you’ve got some kind of drug in your cum because I’m addicted to you.” You admit, scaring yourself honestly at how attached you are to him.

Max chuckles, taking over the pace again when you let him. Rocking up onto his toes to grind into you. “Caught me. Been feeding you cocaine laced cum.” He teases, feeling the same way. “Don’t worry baby, gonna - gonna fuck you for as long as you want.” He’s almost said something about doing more than just fucking, but he’s scared you would turn him down so he keeps quiet. 

His words send you over the edge, making you cry out as you clamp down on his cock, unable to stop yourself from climaxing as he promises to keep fucking you. He groans at how tight you grip him, keeping you upright as you shake. “Baby.” You gasp, “want - want you to cum down my throat. Let me - let me suck you off.”

He groans, knowing this is special. It’s rare that you don’t want him to cum in your pussy. Not that he minds. He talks a big game about blow jobs but he’s never once asked you for one. If you want to suck his cock, you will. It’s that simple in his mind. Nodding, he sets you down and watches as you wrap your hand around his length, kneeling down in front of him. “Fuck.” 

You waste no time in taking him into your mouth with a moan, loving the tangy taste of your own cum coating his cock as you take him down your throat. Another plus of being a vampire: no gag reflex. You look up at him as you take him deep down your throat, loving the way he's watching you.

“Look at you.” He coos, reaching down and stroking your jaw. “You look so pretty with my cock in your mouth.” His eyes roll back and he tilts his head back and moans your name when you press your tongue to the underside of his cock and swallow around the head. “Oh fuck.” He huffs, hips lurching forward to chase that feeling. “So good baby.”

You repeat that action, desperate for him to cum down your throat. You whimper around his cock, reaching down to roll his balls in your fingers, keeping your eyes on him as you watch him moan and groan as you swallow around his thick cock.

“Shiiiit.” Max hisses. “I’m gonna cum.” He warns you. “I’m gonna cum down that pretty little throat of yours. Fuck gonna fill you up, and-“ He tenses up, moaning as he does just that. Pumping spurt after spurt of his cum down your throat. 

You eagerly swallow every drop, closing your eyes at the salty taste that doesn’t have that tang that human cum has in it. You swallow until his balls relax under your touch and you pull off of him, cheekily opening your mouth and sticking your tongue out to show him your empty mouth.

“Good girl.” Max lunges down, eager to taste the remnants of his cum from your mouth. Moaning into you while he kisses you. He’s fucked. He realizes it right at this moment. He wants you. Not for some hate fucking, he’s never hated you. But he wants more that just sex.

You kiss him back, letting him pull you into his arms and you realize how dangerous this is getting. It’s no longer hate fucking, it’s turning into something else and you don’t know how to stop it. You do know that Max would break your heart once he gets bored. “I, um, I still need to call Jerry if you - you can take a blood bag to go if you want.” You step away from him, wishing you had a robe or something to cover you, cover your emotions.

Max’s silent heart clenches and he frowns slightly before he nods. “Sure.” He covers up the hurt with a chuckle and sends you a small smirk. “I have to go move into my fancy new office anyway, sweetheart.” He tucks himself away and zips up before straightening his clothes. He can’t help but feel like you are shoving him out the door. “Until next time.”

You watch him go, leaning against the counter and covering your face with your hands. Fuck, when did it happen? When did you fall in love with Max Phillips?

****

Once Max is settled into his office, you must admit you’ve been avoiding him. Deciding that he doesn’t feel the same and you’d only embarrass yourself by asking him such a question, you avoid Max at all costs. Having your assistant screen calls and meetings for the man, you succeed in avoiding him until you hear his name mentioned in the break room. “Yes. He invited me into his office and we…” The intern giggles as she looks around, not seeing you behind the door, “we had sex on his desk.” Your heart sinks, breaking in two at the news that Max has already moved on. You swallow harshly, unshed tears stinging in your eyes as you make your way back to your office.

“I’m sorry, Mr. Phillips. She is in a meeting with orders to not be disturbed.” Max sighs as he listens to your secretary yet again tell him that you aren’t available. The same thing he’s heard from her every day for nearly two weeks. He’s gone from having sex with you every since day to not seeing you and he hates it. 

“Yeah, thanks.” He mutters into the phone. “Tell her to call me when she’s done.” He drops the phone into the cradle and sighs. He knows you won’t call him, you haven’t despite the messages to your secretary and the texts to your personal phone. He’s getting desperate to see you and figure out what the hell is going on.

You are working late, unavoidable considering the new contract you’re working on, but you curse your assistant leaving on time when your door opens and Max Phillips strides in unannounced. “Phillips.” You greet him coolly, not even looking up from your computer.

Max blinks at the acidity in your tone and it’s on the tip of his tongue to ask if you’re on your period but he knows that doesn’t happen anymore. Unable to deflect with humor like he usually would, he decides to be upfront. “What the hell is going on?” He demands. “We went from wanting to fuck everyday at lunch once we were in the same building to you ghosting me.”

You bite your lip, wanting to growl at him, but you just respond calmly. “Oh, sorry. I thought you had found a new pretty intern to fuck during lunch and I was no longer needed?” You frown, tilting your head at him.

His brow scrunches in confusion and he shakes his head. “What are you talking about? What intern?” He demands, leaning against the door jam. “Only person I’ve fucked is you and I haven’t been doing a lot of that lately.”

You huff, standing up from your desk, you walk around it to face Max. “Are you serious? I heard her earlier. She said she fucked you in her office and as I walked away she said - she said you traced her teeth with your tongue.” You choke, knowing that is something Max and only Max tends to do.

Now he’s pissed, that she’s lying and that you believe this person. “She must have heard that from someone else I’ve fucked before you.” He growls. “Because I’ve not stuck my dick in anyone but you.” He sees that you don’t believe him and scoffs. “Fucking convenient for you to hear this. If you wanted to stop fucking you don’t have to lie. I don’t fucking force anyone to have sex with me. I don’t need to.”

You shake your head, “it wasn’t - fucking hell. That’s the problem. I didn’t want to stop fucking you. You’re lying about fucking someone else and I shouldn’t be mad because I can’t - we can’t keep doing this. You’ve got me tied up in knots. I can’t focus and I- you need to leave before I change my mind and beg you to fuck me on my desk.”

Max stares at you for a moment in disbelief before he pushes off the door and slowly starts to clap. “Bravo.” He shakes his head, a sarcastic grin on his face. “Amazing, you almost had me. See, I knew it was stupid to fall in love with you, knew I was going to get burned eventually. Especially considering I’ve called you every single day and you’ve been the one rejecting me.” He huffs and drops the smile. “The arctic circle ain’t in your cunt, it’s your icy cold heart. Good luck on the next poor fucker.” He growls, turning on his heel to leave this fucking office and go get drunk somewhere.

“You’re a bastard.” You rush to follow him, lucky that no one is around to witness you as you grab Max and spin him around. “This wasn’t in the plan. I wasn’t supposed to fall in love with you.” You rush out, eyes wide as you stare at him. Your heart would be beating out of your chest if you were human but all you can do is stare at him.

Max stares back at you, ready to lash out and deny it. “So if I love you and you love me, why would you think I’d fuck anyone but you?” He demands. “I don’t even know what intern you’re talking about. And I- Jesus, you’re the best lover I’ve ever had. Where could I go after you? No one could ever beat you.”

You swallow harshly at his words, reaching up to cup his cheeks. “I just - I thought you hated me still. I thought it was just sex. I never - I thought you were just fucking me for a release because it’s - it’s the best sex I’ve ever had. No one compares. You are a pain in my ass, but baby, you are strong and smart, so fucking smart, and handsome and you’re funny - even if it’s in a college frat boy kind of way - I just never imagined you’d feel the same way.”

Max chuckles and shakes his head. “I’ve never hated you, sweetheart.” He promises. “I just liked getting under your skin. I liked pissing you off. You’re sexy when you’re annoyed. Like pulling the braids of the girl I like on the playground.” He confesses with a small grin. He steps closer to you, more serious than he’s ever been. “I have not slept with anyone but you since the night we started. I haven’t even looked.”

You believe him, caressing his cheeks, “I love you, Max Phillips.” You whisper, smiling at the cocky bastard who used to make your life hell but now you can’t imagine being without him.

“I love you.” He promises, reaching up to brush his knuckles across your cheeks and he smirks. “Now that we know where we stand, can I fuck you?” He asks, lifting a brow. “I really, really miss being inside you.”

You giggle, reaching up to wrap your arms around his neck, “you want to fuck me in my fancy office, Mr. Phillips?” You tease, leaning in to nip his jaw and you are relieved that you are both on the same page.

“I do want to fuck you in your fancy office.” He smirks, his fangs sliding down and he looks behind you. “You have a drop cloth or a sheet of plastic?” He asks. “Might get a little messy.”

You chuckle, “I might have a bedsheet I snuck in just in case we happened to fuck in here.” You take Max’s hand and guide him into your office, letting go of his hand to get the sheet from your bottom desk drawer, laying it out on the sofa in your office.

Max smirks and starts stripping out of his suit while you adjust the sheet. Eager to touch you, his cock is already throbbing. “I’m going to fuck you so hard baby. The security desk is going to think you’re being staked.”

You playfully roll your eyes at his cocky words but you know he can make you squeal and scream. You finish adjusting the sheet and struggle to pull down the zipper of your dress as Max kicks off his shoes and shoves his pants and boxers down.  

“Too slow sweetheart.” Max tuts, taking over and dragging the zipper down and peeling the dress off of you in the blink of an eye. “Fuck, I love stripping you down. You should stay naked all the time.”

You sigh when Max kisses your neck and shoulder as you kick the dress aside, stepping out of your heels and you spin around to face Max. Pressing your lips to his, you press your chest to his and tangle your fingers in his hair. “Fuck me Max.” You plead, feeling his hard cock pressing into your hip.

“I’m going to.” He promises, happy that you are in his arms again. His tongue trails over your neck and he can’t help himself, sinking his teeth into your flesh while he grabs your ass and hauls you back towards the couch.

You look up at Max as he lays you down on the sofa and you caress his chest, over the space where his heart would be beating. “I love you.” You murmur, spreading your legs to accommodate him as you continue caressing his chest.

He hums, loving hearing you say that. “Love you too.” He groans, sliding his hand between the two of you so he can line up to push inside you. The head of his cock slips inside your cunt as he ducks down to take your nipple into his mouth.

You moan when he pushes into you, feeling like you’re finally home, where you should be. With him. “Max.” You moan, tangling your fingers in his hair as he bites down on your breast and he starts to rock his hips, pushing into you. It’s slow, unlike the always frantic pace, and you sigh in pleasure.

He’s never set a slow pace with you, knowing that he had to make sure you had the most pleasure he could offer within an hour or two. Now he takes his time, he’ll spend all night right here if he has to. Wanting to drag it out for as long as he can. Enjoying the slow drag of his cock in and out of your walls while he works his hip.

“Fuck. That feels good.” You moan, caressing his back as he rocks into you. You whimper when he hits something deep and slowly fucks you. No, he doesn’t fuck you. He makes love to you. “God, you feel so good. No one has ever felt like this.”

Max groans in agreement. He reaches for your hand and laces his fingers with yours. “Bite me.” He begs, wanting to feel your fangs in his flesh. You’ve never bitten him before but he thinks it’s hot to have you do it while he’s buried in your cunt.

You squeeze his hand and feel your fangs appear so you cup the back of his head, pulling him closer so you can sink your fangs into his flesh. There’s no blood but you moan at the sensation of his cock inside of you and your fangs in his neck. It’s incredible and you moan into his flesh as he rocks into you.

“Fuck.” Max groans loudly, cock twitching deep inside you but he doesn’t push harder or faster into you. Keeping his pace slow and steady, while he love the feeling of your fangs breaking through his skin. “Again baby, fuck, mark me as yours.”

You repeat the action, allowing yourself to dive into your instincts, your animalistic ways shining through as you bite him, marking him as yours. The marks will stay, a shimmering scar once they heal over - as soon as your fangs are removed - and you are close to cumming at the thought of Max being yours and only yours.

Max grunts, closing his eyes and smirking as he continues to rock into you. “Love you, so fucking much.” He groans out. “Perfect vampire for me, perfect woman, perfect little pussy.”

You lick over the marks after withdrawing your fangs. “I love you baby. So much. God, you are - you’re an asshole but you’re my asshole. I wouldn’t change you for all the sales in the world. Perfect for me.” You pant, getting closer and closer with every slow rock of his hips until finally, you fall over the edge and clamp down on his cock. Your orgasm is slow, seeming to spread to every inch of your body.

Max buries his fangs in your neck as you come apart for him. Your walls clamp down like a vice around him, soaking him in your release. He loves the way you cry his name, needy and loving. “Love you,” he pants, withdrawing his fangs and pressing his lips to yours when he starts to cum, filling you with his own release in agonizing pleasure.

You cling to him as he cums, filling you up and you’ve missed this so much, missed him so much. You peck his lips over and over as he rides out his orgasm and you caress his shoulders and back. “Love you.” You murmur, actually feeling tired. 

Max kisses your jaw when you tilt your head back. “Not as much as I love you.” 

You snort, “always in competition.” You love him and he loves you. Never, in a million years, would you have imagined that if you’d been asked four months ago but here you are. In love with a blood sucking bastard

[colleybri]

I’ve been catching up on The Americans and reached the Stephen Schiff (consultant on Andor and writer of ep 7) episode ‘Salang Pass’ which features disturbing flashbacks to when undercover Soviet spy Phillip had to undergo sexual encounters training. While he mentally prepares to honey-trap a minor. As in, be prepared to do anything for the cause. Anything. He and his deep-cover wife have to do morally appalling things. They have to be as ruthless as Luthen.

The Americans shows that there’s nothing glamorous about being a deep-cover spy. It would be great if Andor s2 at least touched on that theme. Its rating won’t allow for the really dark sexual material, but I’m sure we’ll get some indications of the deep psychological impact of the less obvious ‘sacrifices’.

“For the greater good” (Saw Gerrera)

“… I burn my decency for someone else’s future” (Luthen Rael)

[cerullos]

mid-year book freakout

tagged by @sapphicscience

number of books you’ve read so far: 57, i set my reading goal for 25 this year hoping it would push me to take my time with each book & be more reflective but then the unemployment hit and i got a little manic

best book you’ve read so far in 2024: poor deer by claire oshetsky is probably my sentimental fav so far! objectively the best were the spear cuts through water by simon jimenez and kindred by octavia butler both of which completely blew me away.

best sequel you’ve read so far in 2024: i very rarely read sequels, i think the only series i’ve read this year are dungeon meshi and beastars. i did read the first installments of dune, interview with the vampire (reread…shut up lmao) and the tainted cup by robert jackson bennett and will probably continue with all three!

new release you haven’t read yet but want to: i’ve had sociopath: a memoir by patrick gagne on hold at the library for months now, so that one comes to mind lol also really interested in picking up craft: stories i wrote for the devil by amanda lima, the haar by david sodergren, little rot by akwaeke emezi and private rites by julia armfield!

most anticipated release for the second half of the year: excited for the new charlotte mcconaghy, wild dark shore! honestly after migrations i’d pay to read her grocery list. also looking forward to hum by helen phillips (i loved the need, also by her!)

biggest surprise: this may just be recency bias but i picked up a good happy girl by marissa higgins not expecting to feel too strongly about it and wow, i felt seen (derogatory) lmao strongly recommend to all lesbians with dad and/or grandma trauma and a penchant for emotional self-sabotage ✌️

favorite new author (debut or new to you): so many! for a few not mentioned above: adora nworah, layla martínez, jennifer marie thorn, neil sharpson and andrew joseph white!

newest fictional crush: oh absolutely catherine from a good happy girl lol the second coming of lydia tár. etain larkin from knock knock, open wide is also up there (final girl turned shitty bitter traumatized mother? obsessed obsessed obsessed with her)

books that made you cry: i’m a robot, i don’t cry over media, i’m sorry! ducks: two years in the oil sands by kate beaton did make me a little misty.

most beautiful books you’ve bought so far this year (or received): working at the public library (and also having no money <\3) has sadly cured me of my compulsive book-buying habit ): i did buy a few physical volumes of dungeon meshi and all of them are gorgeous.

books that made you happy: again, dungeon meshi! & i had a really great time with the tainted cup by robert jackson bennett (fantasy + page-turning mystery with the most endearing cast of characters!) also found come and get it by kiley reid to be oddly delightful despite dealing with some pretty heavy topics.

what books do you need to read by the end of the year?: i’d like to finish emily wilson’s translations of the iliad and the odyssey. also parable of the sower by octavia butler, butter honey pig bread by francesca ekwuyasi and the first installment in the earthsea cycle by ursula k. le guin (all of which have been on my tbr for ages)

tagging @dykes4knights, @strangesmallbard, @thefinalpaperheart, @nicollekidman, @raffaella-cerullo, @jonismitchell , @tennesseewillams , @khukri and whoever else wants to do it!

[wannab-urs]

The Spreadsheet Digest - Vol 26

Howdy!

I am still on soft hiatus, but I think I've read enough over the last few weeks to do one of these. Apologies if I read your fic and it's not on here, I had to kind of dig around to find what I read since I wasn't keeping track.

I have 16 fics for you this week. I'm just pasting in the author provided summary and warnings instead of my usual nonsense bc I still don't have the mental capacity to do that.

As always you can find all of my fic recs here and feel free to tag me in your fics and I'll add them to my tbr!

Recs below the Pedro (a drawing of Pedro as Reed Richards by justralphy on instagram)

The Clink a Javi P one shot by @ramblers-lets-get-ramblin

Summary: Prison Guard Javi Tags: DUBCON due to power imbalance (reader is an inmate and cannot legally consent), oral sex m!receiving, unprotected PIV, creampie

The Sweepstakes a series of one shots by @katareyoudrilling

Summary: A collection of standalone one-shots featuring various Pedro boys. A popular porn site runs a contest for viewers to win a night with their favorite porn star. Tags: Unprotected PiV (paperwork is involved), oral sex (m and f receiving), kink negotiation, some choking and breath play

A Very Furby Christmas a Joel one shot by @proxima-writes

Summary: it’s christmas eve 1998 and joel miller thinks everything is perfect. well, until his brother admits he didn’t get sarah the one present she wanted - the furby. now, joel has to go out on christmas eve to find the year’s hottest toy that’s been sold out for months. turns out, you’re on the same mission. and you’ve both found the last furby in town. Tags: pre-outbreak, no use of y/n, holiday/christmas fic, the last toy trope, no smut, age gap - not explicitly specified but joel is 31 and reader is mid-20s, the great miller gingerbread construction competition, operation get sarah miller a furby, some kissing.

To Touch Darkness a Din one shot by @djarincore

Summary: Din becomes possessed by the darksaber, forcing all of his darkest fears and deepest desires to manifest in a way that threatens to consume you. Tags: dark, dubcon, biting, blood, oral (m/f receiving), hair pulling, rough sex, overstimulation, possessive behavior, name calling, dirty talk, breeding kink, breath play, degradation, unprotected PIV, manhandling, mainly smut

All Mouth a Max Phillips one shot by @idolatrybarbie

Summary: max phillips and prompt no. nine— "you look so pretty like this." with a twist! Tags: reader is not American/not an "American vampire", porn with mild plot, pet names (honey, baby, sweetie, Maxxie), all the usual vampire genre warnings, including but not limited to - graphic blood and gore, cannibalism, mention of scars, horror themes, love as consumption, smut - mommy kink, degradation (max gets called a slut), cock slapping, dacryphilia, orgasm denial, handjob, alcohol mention, fluff.

Sated a Joel one shot by @softlyspector

Summary: Joel just wants you to eat well Tags: love as being consumed, blood drinking, smut from start to finish (piv, f!receiving oral, fingering), Joel's praise kink, talk of eating, consuming, drinking, hunger, etc, vampires you get it.

When My Time Comes Around a Joel series by @ramblers-lets-get-ramblin

Summary: You’ve spent much of the time since the outbreak began alone and isolated. Until, one day, you come upon a man dying in the snow. You save his life and in return, he saves yours. Tags: canon divergence, detailed canon typical violence, detailed descriptions of blood and injuries and wound care, major character death, child loss, grief, suicidal ideation, THERE WILL BE A HAPPY ENDING but it will take a while to get there, ANGST, major angst and this is going to be VERY SAD for a while and I am sorry about making you sad kinda

Uncut a Din one shot by @beskarandblasters

Summary: You give Din his first blowjob and he’s insecure about a little secret he’s been keeping. Tags: no physical description used for Reader, porn with little plot, uncircumcised!Din, shy!Din, oral sex (M receiving), body worship, pet names (baby for Din, cyar’ika for you), cum eating, no use of y/n

The Watch a Joel one shot by @justagalwhowrites

Summary: You try to do something kind for Joel but things backfire in a way you never expected. Tags: SMUT! Canon-typical violence. I did almost no proofing on this so... ya know. Basically no age-gap, reader is 3 years younger than Joel. No use of Y/N. Minors DNI 18+ only

The Checklist a Joel series by @thetriumphantpanda

Summary: Your new boyfriend Joel finds your hidden stash of porn, full of pages with their corners folded over, marking the things you like the most. Expecting him to feel bad about finding things you're into, things you haven't asked for from him, you're surprised when he offers to help you tick them off. This is basically just a kink fest. Tags: Explicit smut, oral sex, established relationship, orgasm denial, breath play, rough sex, exhibitionism, overstimulation, temperature play, free use, bondage, anal play, porn without much plot. Please see individual chapters for additional warnings. No Outbreak AU. No use of Y/N.

Sexfiles.mp3 a Tim Rockford one shot by @beskarandblasters

Summary: You’re a true crime podcaster and you land the interview of your dreams with Detective Tim Rockford. What will happen when you two are alone in the studio after the interview is done? Tags: F!Reader, uneven power dynamic (Tim is a guest on Reader’s show) pet names, oral sex (M and F receiving), semi public sex (I think), vaginal sex, unprotected sex, cream pie, drinking, no use of y/n

Lover, Be Sweet a Marcus Pike series by @idolatrybarbie

Summary: the beautiful evolution of your relationship with fairfax county's newest and cutest resident. Tags: social isolation, touch starvation, alcohol, themes of alienation, allusions to failed relationships, self doubt, light angst, fluff, anxiety, smut

Just a Taste a Joel one shot by @covetyou

Summary: Joel helps you clean up a mess. Tags: daddy kink, cuckolding, creampie, cum eating, oral (f receiving), vaginal fingering, male masturbation, one single pussy slap, rimming if you squint, pet names (baby, sweetheart), dd/lg vibes, established relationship, mention of original male character.

Crawling Back to You a Dieter one shot by @prolix-yuy

Summary: Have you no idea that you're in deep? (it's incubus!Dieter, friends) Tags: religious corruption kink, bastardizing prayers, brief drug use, mentions of alcohol consumption, grinding, oral sex (f receiving), fingering, breaking a hymen, descriptions of blood, biting and drawing blood, pheromone incubus anatomy, size difference/kink like whoa, monster transformation, monster fucking, PiV sex, wildly unrealistic sex, kind of dubious consent in the way that she has no idea what she's getting into so Dieter checks in A LOT, consent is sexy and monsters especially should ask for it, Reader has no idea what she's doing when it comes to summoning an incubus.

New in Town a Joel series by @justagalwhowrites

Summary: When you move to Austin for work, your best friend Sarah recommends that you hang out with her dad, Joel, to get to know the area. Sarah just never mentioned the fact that her dad is just your type. Tags: Contractor Joel, No outbreak, Joel is reader's best friend's dad, Vaginal Sex, Vaginal Fingering, Oral Sex, protected sex, Age Gap

Point A to Point B a Din series by tothestrongones (AO3)

Summary: Escorting a former Empire prisoner of war to a Rebel Alliance safe zone? It should be a piece of cake. Absolutely no problems whatsoever. Tags: Slow Burn, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Praise Kink, Sexual Tension, Amnesia, Hurt/Comfort, Touch-Starved, Smut, Mutual Pining, Peril, Violence, Flashbacks, Oral Sex, Hand Jobs, Dirty Talk, Angst, Implied/Referenced Torture, Canon Divergence, Mando is Very Religious

--------

I'm very happy to tentatively be back in this space. i missed you guys a lot. I'm kind of reworking how I do things here - not putting so much pressure on myself to put things out and be present and read every single thing I can. I have a life and it's a busy one and I can't spend all my time here (unfortunately) but that doesn't mean I have to leave completely. I'll still do these... weekly-ish. Love y'all

--------

Happy Reading!

[mermaidsirennikita]

Odd request: Can you recommend a book with a good Car sex scene?

I feel like we all can list off amazing Carriage scenes but I cannot think of one in a horseless carriage. ( they actually used to call cars that)

I totally see that lol, it is kinda less discussed when it's just... cars.

Nobody's Baby But Mine by Susan Elizabeth Phillips has a scene where the hero (football player, fears his mortality, was tricked into impregnating the heroine and decided the natural solution was to force her to marry him) and the heroine (genius IQ STEM professor, wanted a baby of average intelligence, accidentally selected an NFL player who almost went to med school.... also??? He's a star quarterback lmao???? Like not to stereotype anyone can be smart or dumb in any position but QB is usually one of the thinkier ones, anyway she's pregnant) are at a drive in movie. He does go down on her. SEP sex scenes aren't the most explicit ever, but I found the sex scenes in this book very sexy due to the tension and chemistry the couple had.

Not in Love by Ali Hazelwood has a scene where the hero and heroine have very angsty, passionate car sex. It's excellent, I really like this book a lot. They're basically in a physical-only situationship while also dealing with a big work issue that has them on opposite sides of the table.

LOL................. Not to be my usual "EVERYONE READ SIERRA SIMONE" self, but to be my usual "EVERYONE READ SIERRA SIMONE" self.... There's a scene in Honey Cut where Mark (alpha alpha alpha dom, in an arranged marriage with Isolde, does a lot of public club things with her in front of his guests that she consents to) asks Isolde to "get herself ready" for him to show her off once they get to this party. She is very much in her head because the THIRD person in the car is Tristan, their bodyguard, who Mark has slept with pre-marriage (and this is out in the open) and who Isolde slept with pre-marriage and a LIL BIT POST-MARRIAGE ALSO (this is not out in the open lmao). Noting that Isolde "looks like she's doing her taxes", Mark decides to take care of the issue. In front of Tristan. This is an MMF book so there is cheating, yes, but it like... is a part of it. Start with Salt in the Wound and read Salt Kiss before Honey Cut. But this scene is honestly one of the hottest things I've ever read.

The Duchess Effect by Tracey Livesay has a GREAT scene between Dani (rapper, mogul) and Jamison (erstwhile Prince of England). By this point, they're in a committed relationship. You see them get there in the first book, American Royalty, which needs to be read beforehand.

Play by Kylie Scott has a VERY emotional one in which the hero, who's typically fun-loving, is super upset and the heroine... goes with it lol.

Lush Money by Angelina M. Lopez has a LEGENDARY scene early in the book. This novel is insane, I love it, 10/10.

[msc-ddv-ss]

Character Request Sheet:

The list of all the characters I will write/take requests for:

Walt Disney Animated Movies:

Mickey Mouse and Friends:

Mickey Mouse

Donald Duck

Goofy

Minnie Mouse

Daisy Duck

Pluto

Pete

Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs:

Snow White

The Evil Queen

The Seven Dwarfs

Pinocchio:

Pinocchio

Jiminy Cricket

Dumbo:

Dumbo

Timothy Q. Mouse

Bambi:

Bambi

Thumper

Flower

The Three Caballeros:

Panchito Pistoles

Jose Carioca

The Adventures of Ichabod and Mr. Toad:

Ichabod Crane

Mr. Toad

Cinderella:

Cinderella

Prince Charming

The Fairy Godmother

Alice in Wonderland:

Alice

The Mad Hatter

The Queen of Hearts

The Cheshire Cat

Peter Pan:

Peter Pan

Captain Hook

Tinkerbell

Wendy / John / Michael

Lady and the Tramp:

Lady

Tramp (Butch)

Sleeping Beauty:

Aurora

Prince Philip

Fauna / Flora / Merryweather

Maleficent

101 Dalmations:

Pongo

Perdita

Cruella De Vil

The Sword and The Stone:

Merlin

Wart (Arthur)

Madam Mim

The Jungle Book:

Baloo

Mowgli

Bagheera

King Louie

Shere Khan

The Aristocats:

Thomas O’Malley

Duchess

Marie / Toulouse / Berlioz

Robin Hood:

Robin Hood

Maid Marian

Little John

Prince John

Winnie the Pooh:

Winnie the Pooh

Christopher Robin

Tigger

Piglet

Eeyore

Rabbit

Kanga / Roo

Owl

The Rescuers:

Bernard

Miss Bianca

The Fox and The Hound:

Tod

Copper

The Black Cauldron:

Taran

Eilonwy

Fflewddur Fflam

Gurgi

The Horned King

The Great Mouse Detective:

Basil of Baker Street

Professor Ratigan

Oliver & Company:

Oliver

Dodger

Bill Cykes

The Little Mermaid:

Ariel

Prince Eric

Ursula

King Triton

Sebastian

Flounder

Beauty and The Beast:

Belle

The Beast

Gaston

Lumiere

Cogsworth

Aladdin:

Aladdin

Jasmine

The Genie

Jafar

The Nightmare Before Christmas:

Jack Skellington

Sally

Oogie Boogie

The Lion King:

Simba

Nala

Scar

Timon / Pumba

Rafiki

A Goofy Movie:

Goofy

Max Goof

Roxanne

Pocahontas:

Pocahontas

John Smith

Governor Ratcliffe

The Hunchback of Notre Dame:

Quasimodo

Esmeralda

Captain Phoebus

Claude Frollo

Hercules:

Hercules

Megara

Hades

Phil

Mulan:

Fa Mulan

Li Shang

Mushu

Shan Yu

Tarzan:

Tarzan

Jane

Clayton

The Emperor's New Groove:

Emperor Kuzco

Pacha

Yzma

Kronk

Atlantis: The Lost Empire

Milo Thatch

Princess Kida

Commander Rourke

Helga Sinclair

Lilo & Stitch:

Stitch

Lilo Pelekai

Nani Pelekai

Jumba

Pleakley

Treasure Planet: (Please Gameloft, I'm begging you...)

Jim Hawkins

John Silver

Captain Amelia

Dr. Delbert Doppler

Brother Bear:

Kenai

Koda

Home on the Range:

Maggie

Mrs. Calloway

Grace

Alameda Slim

Chicken Little:

Chicken Little

Buck Cluck

Meet the Robinsons:

Lewis

Wilbur Robinson

The Bowler Hat Guy

Bolt:

Bolt

Mittens

Rhino

The Princess and The Frog:

Tiana

Prince Naveen

Dr. Facilier

Louis

Mama Odie

Tangled:

Rapunzel

Flynn Rider / Eugene Fitzherbert

Mother Gothel

Wreck-It Ralph:

Wreck-It Ralph

Vanellope Von Schweetz

Fix It Felix

Sergeant Calhoun

King Candy / Turbo

Frozen:

Anna

Elsa

Kristoff

Olaf

Hans

Big Hero 6:

Hiro Hamada

Baymax

Gogo

Wasabi

Honey Lemon

Fred

Zootopia:

Judy Hopps

Nick Wilde

Chief Bogo

Moana:

Moana

Maui

Raya and the Last Dragon:

Raya

Sisu

Namaari

Encanto:

Mirabel Madrigal

The Madrigal Family

Strange World:

Searcher Clade

Ethan Clade

Meridian Clade

Jaeger Clade

Splat

Wish:

Asha

Valentino

King Magnifico

Live Action Movies:

Pirates of the Caribbean:

Captain Jack Sparrow

Will Turner

Elizabeth Swann

Hector Barbossa

Davy Jones

Enchanted:

Giselle

Robert Phillip

Prince Edward

Hocus Pocus:

Mary Sanderson

Sarah Sanderson

Winfred Sanderson

Pixar Movies:

Toy Story:

Woody

Buzz

Jessie

Bo Peep

Monsters Inc.:

James P. Sullivan

Mike Wazowski

Celia Mae

Randall Boggs

Boo

Finding Nemo:

Marlin

Nemo

Dory

Bruce

Hank

The Incredibles:

Mr Incredible

Elastigirl

Dash

Violet

Jack-Jack

Frozone

Syndrome

Edna Mode

Cars:

Lightning McQueen

Ratatouille:

Remy

Wall-E:

Wall-E

EVE

Up:

Carl Fredrickson

Russel

Dug

Kevin

Charles Muntz

Brave:

Merida

Coco:

Miguel Rivera

Hector Rivera

Mama Imelda Rivera

Ernesto De La Cruz

Onward:

Ian Lightfoot

Barley Lightfoot

Soul:

Joe Gardner

22

Luca:

Luca

Alberto

Giulia

Turning Red:

Meilin “Mei” Lee

Elemental:

Ember

Wade

Disney Television Animation Shows:

DuckTales:

Scrooge McDuck

Louie / Dewey / Huey Duck

Launchpad McQuack

Webby Vanderquack

Bentina Beakley

Phineas and Ferb:

Phineas Flynn

Ferb Fletcher

Candace Flynn

Perry the Platypus

Dr. Heinz Doofenshmirtz

Gravity Falls:

Dipper Pines

Mabel Pines

Grunkle Stan

Soos Ramirez

Wendy Corduroy

Bill Cipher

Amphibia:

Anne Boonchuy

Sprig Plantar

Polly Plantar

Hop Pop Plantar

Sasha Waybright

Marcy Wu

Owl House:

Luz Noceda

Edalyn Clawthorne

King Clawthorne

Amity Blight

Gus Porter

Willow Park

Hunter 

Hooty

(The list will be updated whenever any new films release, new characters release in Dreamlight Valley, and when I feel comfortable writing for some of the other shows)

[annabellewynter]

Wild Lavender

Chapter One

Summary: Everett Greenwood never expected to be the Duke of Rorchester, that was a job for his older brother. But when sudden tragedy strikes, he finds himself thrust into a life he never wanted. Then he sees Melina delivering honey to the grand hall. The girl who lives in a shack in the woods becomes the only love his heart has ever known, but can society accept the simple woman as his choice? And will secrets from her past destroy their chance at love? Find out in Wild Lavender.

Note: This story is intended to be a Regency Romance and I have attempted to stay historically accurate, however, I am not a historian, so please excuse any errors.

Everett Greenwood sipped on a glass of brandy as stared out the window of his office. The small flat he called his home for the last several years was perched above a main thoroughfare in London and gave him the perfect vantage point to watch the bustling streets below. It was evening, and the sky was slowly darkening the way it does in the early days of spring. Many were on the street, the unusually fine weather pulling ladies and gentlemen alike from their homes to enjoy the fresh air. There were elegantly dressed couples in carriages, others strolling home from dinner parties and some just enjoying an evening stroll.

London

Everett did not consider himself to be a nostalgic sort, but he had to admit that he felt a pang of sadness at the realization that this would be the last night he would take in this view.

     His thoughts were interrupted by a high-pitched giggle coming from down the hall, followed by the low moan of a male's voice.  Everett shook his head moving towards the door to close it when the door down the hall flung open.  A woman furiously stomped down the hall while Phillip Matthews, still only partially dressed and holding his trousers up with one hand, shouted after her.

“Is it Anne?  Lily!  It must be Lily.”  He faltered as the woman reached the bottom of the stairs and he made one final attempt.  “Ruth?”

Her head snapped back to Philip's.

"It's Beatrix, you prat."

And with that, she was out the door.

Everett watched as Phil ambled into his office and slumped onto the couch.  He poured him a brandy and refilled his own before he took the seat opposite him.  

“That didn’t  quite go as planned, I imagine.”

Phil shook his head and poured back the brandy.

“Not even one bit,”  he sucked the air in through his teeth.  “I certainly hope you have more forgiving women in Rorchester.  

Everett shrugged, taking a sip of his drink.  “I wouldn’t know.  I haven’t been there since I was six years old.”

Phil's dark eyebrows knit together in confusion. "Since you were six? But your father was the Duke!"

"Yes, but we never lived there. He kept the London home and we lived here where Mother could be a more central part of society. Occasionally he had to go to Rorchester, but he never brought me. George was the oldest and would become Duke, so I didn't have to be there."

"Well, this is great news then!" Phil slapped his knee in excitement. "You can just do the same and we don't need to leave London and head out into the middle of the countryside where nothing and no one exists."

The stare Everett issued to Phil said plenty and he once again reiterated, "You do not have to come Phil. I will be just fine on my own. Besides, I've been thinking of asking Kipley to join me in Rorchester to help get things in order."

Phil's mouth fell open in shock. "First, you are not doing this without me. You need me. Secondly,  why on earth would you invite Kip? He has got to be the most extraordinary dull human being in all of England!" 

Everett did his best to hide his smirk. "Kip happens to be extremely good at arithmetic. I understand he was a great help to his uncle in organizing his books."

"Of course, you understand that!" He was standing now, pacing the room, still holding his trousers up with his fist. "He told us no less than three hundred times what a big help he was!"

Everett knew this line of conversation would irritate Phil and he was rather enjoying goading his closest friend. Still, asking for assistance from Kipling Stromwell was an intriguing idea. The truth was that Everett had no idea how to run a Duchy. Not only had his father neglected to teach him, but Everett had little interest in such dealings. He had spent his years after university in His Majesty's Navy. That was how second-born sons were meant to bring their families pride. But now, with both his father and brother killed in a sudden accident, he became responsible for his mother, his two younger sisters, and an enormous quantity of land and the people living on it. He knew absolutely nothing about how to successfully do this.  The only thing he did know was that he didn’t want to do it the way his father did.  Everett didn’t take things lightly, so although it was not the position he wanted or imagined himself in, he would do it to the best of his ability, nonetheless. So, he packed up his life, sold his flat, and sent all his father's records to Rorchester. His mother and sisters could stay in the London home. There was no need to further disrupt their lives. But Everett knew the only way to learn about his duty and to do it well, was to be in Rorchester.

"Tell me you are kidding about Kip, Everett" Phil pleaded.

"He would be useful. I'm not certain you could claim the same" Everett challenged.

Phil scoffed. "My uses are far and beyond bookkeeping."

"Oh really? Such as…"

Phil stood thinking and then snapped his fingers in delight. "Entertainment. Who else will make sure you don't become some stuffy old Duke, wasting away in his grand estate? I'll keep you young and having fun…and getting laid" he smirked.

"You didn't seem to do such a great job of it for yourself."

Phil scoffed. "I've had to bid farewell to far too many women this week. I was bound to make a mistake here or there."

Everett chuckled. He adored Phil from the moment they met at University and he convinced him to cheat at a game of cards. They were both quite inebriated and their attempts did not go unnoticed.  It only took a few hands before they were discovered, but Phil, keen as he was, noticed a split second before they were confronted.  He shoved a fistful of winnings into his waistcoat, grabbed a bottle of scotch off a nearby table, and tugged Everett out the door.  

They ran as fast as they could, twisting through alleyways and side streets.  Everett can still remember how much his lungs burned with the exertion and how his cheeks ached with laughter.  Eventually, they ducked into an empty doorway and hid out of sight until they were sure they were safe.  It was then they opened the scotch and each took a long pull on the bottle.  Phil emptied his pockets and they counted their winnings.  

“You do realize that my father is a Duke, Philip.  Money is not hard to come by.  I easily could have bought a bottle of liquor,” Everett chuckled.  

Phil shook his head, still counting their loot.  “My father is the Earl of Barlington” His voice became low and stern, mimicking his father.  “We’ve always been able to buy whatever we please, Everett.  The point is”, he looked up meeting Everett’s eyes.  “Liquor tastes better when stolen and a muff feels better when borrowed.”  He waggled his eyebrows.  “Now come on, Everett.  Let's go to the brothel.  I think we have just enough.”

“What is it?” Phil asked, taking in the faraway look on Everett’s face.  

“Nothing. I was just remembering the day we met.”

Phil smirked, “Damn, I still have dreams about that blonde.”

“You do have a way of entertaining, I suppose.  Although I’m rather shocked we made it without ever getting into trouble.  Especially in the Navy.”

“We were officers in the Navy, Rett.  The son of a Duke and an Earl at that.  How much could they do to us?”

Everett shook his head, “The second son of a Duke and the third of an Earl.  It may have gotten us out of a few jams at University but His Majesty’s Navy is an entirely different story.”

“Fair enough,” Phil stood, setting down his empty glass with a clang.  “Now it’s our last night out in London for a good while.  And you, my friend, are no longer the second son, but a Duke in his own right.  Let's go out in the city and see how much we can get away with, eh?”

The following morning, Everett woke with a start.  To be clear, it was not his first time waking that day, nor was it morning.  Everett had already rose, dressed, and poured himself into a carriage headed for Rorchester.  He remembered very little of this, other than his head throbbing painfully and the sun seeming exceedingly bright for the hour.  It took only a moment before he was, once again fast asleep to the rumbling of the carriage.  

The second time he woke, was half a day later when the carriage stopped at Greenwood Hall.  Everett peeled his eyes open, taking a moment to adjust to the lack of movement, and ran his hands through his thick brown hair.  His large hand rubbed the scruff on his chiseled jaw that he had neglected to shave before departing.  It was not the impression he had intended to make but when he recalled the night of revelry he enjoyed in his final night living in London, he could not say that he regretted his carelessness with his appearance.  Everett’s muscles felt tight from the long journey and he took a moment to stretch his limbs.  As he did so, he attempted to rouse Philip.  

“We’re here, Phil” 

Phil rolled over with a groan and buried his face.  

Everett harshly nudged his leg.  “We’re here.  Get up!”

“Alright, alright.  Clearly what the Duke says, goes.” He lifted his head with a gruff.

“Have you finished mocking me?”

Phil stretched with a smirk.  

“I’m insulted!  I would never challenge the commands of the Master of the House.” 

“You are an ass,” Everett growled and exited the vehicle.  He walked towards the house, taking in the staff waiting outside to meet him.  It was a skeleton staff at this point, only the bare minimum until Phil had adjusted to what was needed and arranged for the necessary hiring.  

Everett and Phil had brought their valets from London which would be plenty for the time being. In addition, there was a butler and housekeeper, cook, and several general maids together performing the tasks that a dozen or more staff would normally do. However, since the great house had remained closed up, outside the servants' quarters, that was enough.

Greenwood Hall was a grand hall of dark red brick accented with white stone entryways and windows. The hall was wide and flanked by a clock tower on one side and an orangery on the other.  Behind the estate was one of the grandest gardens in all of England.  It had been designed by Everett’s great-grandmother who deeply loved Rorchester and Greenwood Hall.  He grew up hearing the stories, but never fully understood why his father had abandoned the hall.  It’s true, this area was not wealthy.  Everett had heard his father complain for years that the farmers were not successful in this area and the villages were poverty-stricken.  It seemed an odd revelation to behold this grand empty hall presiding over it all.  

Everett took a few moments to introduce himself to the staff and allowed the housekeeper, Edna Baker to show him through the parts of the hall that had been reopened for him.

“Unfortunately, due to the unexpected passing of the late Duke, we did not anticipate that the hall would be opening again so soon.  I apologize that we were unable to have it ready for you, Your Grace.”

Everett shook his head.  “No need to apologize, Ms. Baker.  It was quite unexpected.”

The estate felt oddly familiar to Everett, but not recognizable. Almost the way you remember a dream immediately after waking but you can never quite get the full picture clear.  It felt odd and he found himself drifting into a sort of daydream when Philip finally arrived from the car and joined them.  

“This is quite a place, Rett.”

Everett nodded, taking in the scene as they strode up the stairs of the grand hall.  The floors below were a bold black and white marble and the rich mahogany wood of the railings was shiny and smelled of fresh polish.  They had made sure to clean and polish this area of the home so that it was presentable for his arrival.  As the light shone through the rows of windows lining the front of the house, however, he could see the particles of dust floating through the air from years of inactivity.  When they reached the second floor, Everett and Phil were each taken to their respective rooms where their valets had stored their belongings.  Everett had asked not to be placed in the Duke’s former chambers.  It felt odd to him to take over the bed his father and mother slept in, even if it was so many years ago.

“Is there anything I can get you, Your Grace?” Edna inquired.

“No thank you, Ms. Baker.  I believe I will wash up and perhaps take a stroll in the gardens before dinner.”

“Very well, Your Grace.”

Phil stretched beside him.  “I think I am going to rest a bit longer.  I’ll be down for dinner.”

Everett nodded and turned to go but then stopped.  “Thank you, Phil.”

Phil shrugged, “What for?”

“You’re a good friend, Phil.  I know the decision to move out here and help me to get settled into….all of this.  It was not an easy choice.”

“Sure it was.”  Phil clapped Everett on the shoulder.  “That’s what friends do, Everett.”

And with that, Everett and Phil parted ways, into their rooms.

After getting washed and shaved, Everett felt like a new man.  He once again, wandered through Greenwood Hall, this time with fresh eyes.  It wasn’t time for dinner and the weather was fine, so he exited onto the veranda to look out at the gardens.  

The gardens covered acres of land and included a hedge maze, a pergola covered with roses and wisteria, flowering bushes, and a glass greenhouse for a winter garden.  

Everett closed his eyes and breathed in the fresh air, lightly scented with the early spring buds beginning to blossom.  He opened his eyes and looked out at the sky. It was startling the colors that he could pick up when he looked. There was orange and yellow, but red, pink, and purple too. He couldn't remember the last time he had paid any mind to the sky at dusk and realized just how lovely it truly is. But when he heard the screech of the old back door open, his eyes easily left the sky to study the woman exiting below.

She was wearing a long flowing dress and he could see she was thin but strong. Her hair was strawberry blonde and pulled back into a braid, although several strands had escaped and were flying wildly around her as an evening breeze blew in. 

Everett was mesmerized by her, watching her walk purposefully across the narrow garden path and towards the forest. He had not even seen her face, but with each step she took away from him, a feeling of panic began to rise in his chest. He stared, fighting the urge to call out or run after her.  He needed to stop her, but no words came.  So he simply watched, until she was gone, disappearing into the trees.

Everett exhaled, realizing he had been holding his breath. He instinctively clapped his large hand over his chest, feeling his heart wake up like a bear hibernating for a long winter and suddenly coming alive with the spring. Everett did not know exactly what this strange feeling of longing and regret was, but he knew one thing.  He needed to find her. 

Please let me know if you would like to be added or removed from taglist at any time.

@twinkleallnight @leelee10898 @tinkie1973 @alj4890 @jovialyouthmusic @princess-geek @sweetest-marbear @karahalloway @kingliam2019 @princessleac1 @nestledonthaveone @bebepac

[tricornonthecob]

A fifth AGAIN

LK 108: Congress 2, Just in time for a shutdown-aloo

(pt1)(pt2)(pt3)(pt4)(pt5)

Dad!Moses has seen this before. He knows James' moodiness.

Lolololol neither did James

Him paying on time doesn't mean he's totally honest.

Sarah you don't need to rub salt in the wounds.

"What did I just say I literally sewed these buttons onto my dad's jacket, keep up"

"....oh fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck"

"...Wait. Chaos. Chaos!!!!"

I feel like this VA's voice is to velvety and rich to fully communicate how much the man could apparently drone on.

So like. James has been bungling it all day. But Weaselly Paul just... accepts that he managed to get it done now? You know I'm just not so sure Britain is sending its finest.

Chaos Crew gon fuck you up.

Passive perception +6 on this kid, this is why he's the field agent who gets all the contracts.

You Roll I Roll We Roll

Sarah honey are you feeling all right? You look like you're experiencing a touch of cognitive dissonance. Maybe a dash of inner conflict? Any long-held values get upheaved? Any chance you've been getting closer to a beagle/great dane puppy of a boy in the last few months?

Source. British man said Source.

Tell us how you really feel, Paul.

She's right beside you, bud, but it is cute how you worry.

I'm sorry something about the visual of her just popping right up from the grass gave me a chuckle. She's becoming feral, but perhaps she was feral all along. Man she really is her father's child, isn't she.

Props to the 18th century teenage boy for having this much emotional intelligence to reflect on and talk about his feelings so easily.

oh wow AND he's asking about her feelings? The bare minimum in a caring relationship? Be still my heart! Be careful you don't swoon, Sarah.

I love hearing her mental gymnastics. Also damn, don't cross a Phillips, she is completely down with ruining that man's career for making her friends look like idiots. Honestly, though, same. Maybe she gets that from her mother?

Holy fucking shit did Henri sabotage the boat

Oh, he knows, James. He knows.

I know I could probably make an inane comment about Benji Franx here but honestly I like leaning more into the fact that he cares about the only child of his London Beloved, Lady Phillips. I bet he was kind of like the Cool Uncle to Sarah when he was in London for all that time.

anyway byeeee

[perotovar]

AHHHH PEDRO PASCAL ASKS LETS GO!!!

2,3 and 8 ☺️💕✨

Sending you all my love dearest Erin! 💌

EEEEE thank you honey!!!! and all the love back to you, erika <33

2. What character first brought you into the Pedro fandom?

officially, joel. but the first character of his i ever saw was jack. i consider jack to be my first love when it comes to pedro lol

i always liked him from a distance after that; i saw him in ww84 and thought he was the best part of the movie (still think so) so i knew he was an amazing actor. i never saw mando when it came out because i'm not a star wars girlie (gn) but my mom had! and she kept telling me to watch it because "he's a space cowboy bounty hunter, erin, he's your type" (boy, was she right) but i just never got around to it.

then he was cast as joel and i went "HMMM....... he's a great actor, he could probably pull it off" but i was cautiously optimistic because tlou has been my favorite video game for years and video game adaptations are notoriously awful. then he was amazing and after episode 3 i was hooked lmao

3. Max Lord or Max Phillips? Marcus Pike or Marcus Moreno?

ok i know i just posted a max phillips gifset and i'm a slut for vampires in any universe, but i'm gonna pick max lord. i will not hear any slander over his cheesy 80s suits or any shallow opinions on his appearance. maxwell lord is attractive because pedro is playing him and you cannot tell me otherwise. he's a deeply tragic character and pedro SLAYED the acting ok.

and i choose marcus pike. he's such a sweet character and the most boyfriend-coded man he's ever played. marcus moreno is a total sweetie and i love him, but i am not the target audience for that movie so it's hard to watch 😭

8. Be flirted with by Agent Whiskey or Javier Peña?

ERIKA, YOU'RE EVIL FOR THIS.

both would have me on the god damn floor jfc. i legitimate can't pick between the two of them.

on the one hand you've got the charisma and swagger of jack who would give me the sweetest of petnames that would turn me into a puddle.

and on the other, you've got javi who would whisper the filthiest shit in my ear that would have me blushing so god damn hard and giggling like a school girl.

i can't pick. can i have both? (at the same time?)(can i have them kiss each other?)

[arbitrarystrawberry]

spell your url with song titles and then tag as many people as there are letters

Thanks for the tag, @entomologistologist! I had a lot of fun with this.

Air For Free, Relient K Rockstar, A Great Big World Believer, Capital Kings I Wanna Get Better, Bleachers Two, Sleeping at Last Rejoice, Andrew Peterson Addict with a Pen, Twenty One Pilots Rainbow Veins, Owl City Young, The National Parks See the Day, Brian David Gilbert This Week the Trend, Relient K Runaway, The National All My Friends, Owl City Whiskey and Wine, Tow'rs Beeswing, Richard Thompson Eustace Scrubb, Sarah Sparks Risen Indeed, Andrew Peterson Raging Fire, Phillip Phillips You Told the Drunks I Knew Karate, Zoey Van Goey

I am also not going to tag 19 people, but I did go through my following list to remind myself which mutuals are still at least semi-active, so if any of you want to do this, I'd love to see your lists! @hobbitsetal @askullinajar @vapor-ghoul @courage-is-when-we-face-our-fear @horrendoushag @oleander-and-honey @please-dont-pet-the-okapi @the-movie-that-was-never-made @mademoiseli @starlitsorcerer @milkygastrobones @autistic-beanmonster @truehauntings

[queeniecook]

Little Phil taking a nap with snugs. Pretty darn cute!!

Toddlerhood happened. He may have too much of his Mom in him, time will tell.

I will say Regina seems to enjoy having a dog around.

Which left Daddy Zest to deal with this mess.

Nancy popped in to see her grandson, she has her face stuck like this due to botox. She seems to like Regina, must be the evilness.

Little Phil grew into a child! He's not bad looking.

"Mom, the zoo was awesome! I wanna be a giraffe!" Phillip says excitedly.

"That's great honey, now tell me more about these man eating lions..."