#Penguins: ...Nah not really

[askmagicantprince]

NINTEN WHAT HAPPENED??

"AAAAA-- WHAT-- WHAT HAPPENED? SOMETHING HAPPENED? ARE YOU GUYS OKAY!?"

"Don't scare me-- I mean, US like that! Nothing ever happens here! We are all just fine. Don't yell like that again, please. I'm sensitive to sudden loud noises."

"...We don't have much of those around here anyways. So, please, no yelling in my kingdom!"

[nehswritesstuffs]

Peer Review

Something about this sort of scenario seems just so Law to me and I can't really put my finger on it, even after writing it out, so here we are.

3227 words; starts off with a 19yo Law and all the self-righteous fury contained therein (Penguin is 21, Shachi 20, and Bepo 15, for comparison); I’m sure that some people have done something similar but it’s my turn with the football now I guess; may or may not work within canon, idk yet, try not to think about it too much; maybe get an additional editing pass after I sleep idk on that either

Peer Review; Law is sick of watching all of Flevance's contributions go to waste, which leads him to take drastic measures: passing board exams.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

“Uh… are you sure this is a good idea…?” Penguin wondered. He watched as Law was hunched over the table in the Polar Tang’s mess hall, furiously completing paperwork. His captain did not answer him and that only made him worry more. “Cap…?”

“Ignore him,” Shachi droned from the kitchen. “You’re never going to win.”

“This is not about winning—this is about him being delusional.”

“No, what’s delusional,” Law said, slamming his pen down on the table, “is that these uptight twits playing at doctor think they can just ignore an entire plethora of medical and scientific achievements simply due to the authors getting in the crossfire of a genocide! They know they’re not publishing the truth in these fucking jokes they call medical journals! It’s like peer review means that they just skimmed it over right quick before putting it to press! If they had any shred of ethical acumen these works would be known and referenced!”

“Literally none of us have ever seen you more upset and it’s kind of scary,” Penguin mentioned. “I mean, you’re sounding like you’re about to vomit a thesaurus.”

“What I am about to vomit is the contents of my stomach because they are ignoring my parents’ work!” Law retorted. He gestured over to the wall, where a knife had been Shambled into the metal as it held up a journal that had been stabbed through the center. “I remember reading it! I was there! My parents let me read over it to check for typos! And we’re talking about one of the medical associations that turned me away as a kid!”

“Yeah, and what is passing boards going to do about it?”

“Give me an in.” Law went back to the paperwork, manically filling everything out to the best of his ability. He put together what he hoped was an impressive resume, hoping that it would be enough to convince the licensing committee to allow him to sit the boards without going through all of med school on-island first. If he was pressed, he probably could have figured out how he knew more than the average fourth-year med student by the time he was eight years old…

“Hey everyone! News Coo’s here!”

“Shit!” Law scrambled to sit up and run over to the hatch of the Polar Tang, where Bepo was waiting on the top deck. A News Coo was sitting idly on the railing, resting itself as it stared at the pile of mail in Bepo’s paw. Law took the envelopes from the Mink and began to sort through them, finding one small, discreet letter amongst ad leaflets about a WEJ news subscription and Shachi’s naughty Sora, Warrior of the Sea fan zine.

A letter from the licensing board.

Law shoved the rest of the mail back towards Bepo and tore open the envelope. He read it over three times, with his friends divvying up their own mail in the meantime.

“I got my in,” Law marveled quietly, voice barely above a whisper. He turned towards his crew—his friends—his brothers—and laughed. “I can take the exam!”

“You what…?” Shachi blinked in confusion. “What was all that paperwork for then?”

“Red tape that they want me to come in and fill out, but I already got the jump on them so they can’t pretend like it doesn’t exist.” Law put up a Room and popped the paperwork, a pen, and an envelope to the deck, replacing it with the letter and Shachi’s zine. He ignored the complaints as he put together his response and stuffed it in the envelope, putting it in the News Coo’s bag before the bird took off.

Now, it was off to Lvneel.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

“You have an… interesting set of credentials,” the woman at the desk frowned. She let her eyes flit from the papers in front of her to the boy sitting on the other side of her desk. He was trying to not fidget, though it was also apparent that the attempt at looking serious was just something unfortunate his face did. Not only that, he looked so young, even if he did have patchy facial hair filling in on his chin and cheeks. So young and so unsettlingly familiar…

“All worth its weight, I can assure you,” he replied. “The gap I can explain by having worked out in the field, which I’m told is often worth as much as thrice the same amount of time in the classroom.”

“True… but without verification, I can’t really say that this is as solid as you claim, not to mention the fee…” She watched as the boy took some money from his inner jacket pocket and placed it on the table. “A bribe…?”

“All the admissions fees, up front, in your hands, now.” He stared her down as she counted it—not a beri out of place. “There is nothing barring me from taking the exam.”

“You’re feisty—I like you,” she smirked. “You’ll mostly be a pain to the other departments, which to me is honestly enough reason to let you through. You just have to remember something.”

“Anything.”

“Lvneelish people don’t take kindly to being made fools.” The boy froze, seemingly afraid he was caught in some sort of lie, and she chuckled. “I don’t know who you are, Wittman Lars, or where you really came from, but just remember that if you’re going to go through with this, then make it good. Do you understand?”

“Yes, ma’am,” the boy nodded. He looked cowed, as though he rarely deferred as such. She watched as he bit his lower lip in thought, slipping further away from the headstrong confidence that he had walked in with. “If I pass this exam, I can submit studies and critiques to the Greater Lvneel Medical Journal, right?”

“It would be within your right, yes.” She raised an eyebrow at the boy, who looked much younger in that moment than she was comfortable with. “I won’t ask your reasons, but is that why you are sitting this exam?”

His silence was all the answer she needed.

“Then get out of my office—collect the necessary paperwork on the way out.” She handed him a slip of paper with a stamp on it, which he stared at incredulously… as though he didn’t entirely believe he was holding it. “Exams are in three weeks; a failed exam can be retaken in six months. Not reporting forfeits your right to another chance for a year. Cheating bars you for five years. Any other questions will be answered by the secretaries; now leave.”

It took a moment for the boy’s brain to catch up and he scrambled up from the chair and scurried out of the office like a scared animal unsure of its limbs. She nodded to herself, wondering how many people would see in the boy what she saw—hopefully not too many.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

“Three weeks?!” Penguin griped. They were in the small rented house they had found on the outskirts of the city, far enough away from the main of Lvneel to not attract too much attention. Shachi was already getting dinner prepped while Bepo was helping Law sort through medical books at the kitchen table. The eldest Heart Pirate had just gotten home with the shopping when Law dropped the news on him.

“That’s when it is; can’t change it,” Law replied. “I’m surprised the registrar let me do any of it at all.”

“This is going to eat into our savings, you know this,” Penguin frowned. Shachi wordlessly took the bag from his hand and procured the seal meat that was going to be the night’s dinner. “We don’t have that much.”

“I thought the haul we got from those Kueni assholes was more than enough to let us coast for half a year in a more central part of town,” Law reminded him. Penguin only folded his arms in response. “Besides, it’ll do us good to be on land for a bit, and the Tang’s not that far away if you want to visit her.”

“She’s a ship, not a woman.”

“Yeah, but same rules apply.” Law opened a Room and moved a fresh stack of books to a nearby shelf. “We’re going to be here long enough for me to sit the exam and get a hold of my certification. If it takes that long, then it’s going to take that long.”

“You’re fucking nuts if you think we’re going to stay under the radar the entire time.”

“Then it’s a good thing I don’t.” Law handed Bepo a book and pointedly did not look at Penguin. “I think she recognized me.” His crewmates all stopped to stare at him in horror.

“Wait, what?!” Shachi snapped. “Cap, don’t tell me you’re going to get us all busted because of this!”

“We won’t,” Law assured. “They can’t prove anything, not until it’s too late, and once I get my license they can’t strip me of it unless a malpractice suit comes up against me or there’s an injunction, both of which take time.”

“It’s bad enough Bepo’s a bear—don’t apologize Bep—but someone recognizing you?!” Shachi put his hands on his hips while their kid brother whimpered. “We’re literally hundreds of miles from Flevance. Why do you think this lady recognized you?!”

“Just a feeling,” he shrugged. “People travel for work or pleasure; medical tourism was a thing where I grew up; I’ve got a Flevench face—any number of reasons.”

“For fuck’s sake…”

“I told you,” Penguin said, gesturing at Law as though he wanted to add a “see this shit” at the end.

“Then leave,” Law deadpanned. He handed another book to Bepo, who put it in the appropriate stack. “Nothing’s stopping you. The door’s right there.”

“Yeah, but why would we leave Bepo alone with you?” Penguin scoffed. “He needs an adult.”

“I am an adult.”

“Tch; barely.”

“…and whose idea was it to beat the bear up?”

Okay, he had them there, but…!

“Are you going to hang that over us forever?” Shachi groaned.

“As long as I need to.”

“Then I say I should be able to hold my arm over you in retaliation,” Penguin sniffed. Law simply acted as though he hadn’t heard his eldest crewmate, continuing with sorting his study materials. “It still gets tingly, you know.”

“That’s because you probably have carpal tunnel, not because of anything I did,” Law replied dully. “I’d fix it for you if you let me near your arm next time you experience localized paresthesia.”

Penguin and Shachi exchanged an exasperated look before looking at Bepo, who shrugged helplessly. The sooner they could get their captain off this rock, the sooner he’d be less of a dick, they supposed.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

While the crankiness that the Hearts dealt with as Law was studying for his exam was unbearable, the exam itself was even worse. Law sat in the large room with dozens of other applicants; it was warm and stuffy and smelled like burnt coffee and body odor. He was the youngest person in the room by-far, which was something that he knew others noticed. The uncomfortable feeling of eyes on him raked against the young man as he sat at his seat and readied himself alongside all the other candidates. He knew that not only was he not someone who had been through courses with everyone else there, but he looked different—like his father—and there had to be at least a few people in the room aware enough to put two and two together. The Doctors Trafalgar had both done plenty of talks on neighboring islands, after all.

In both an instant and forever, the exam was done. The room was made to put down their pens and Law began to panic, knowing there was too much test left. He put all the papers in order in their folder and handed them in despite his nerves. Before he realized it, the teen was vomiting in the bushes outside of the university hall, Penguin and Shachi holding onto him while Bepo wrung his paws in distress.

“What the fuck has you like this, Cap?” Shachi wondered as Law finished dry-heaving. The younger man was still shaking unsteadily within his grasp.

“I… I couldn’t finish the test,” he croaked, voice raw. “They kept staring at me… and I couldn’t even finish…”

“Maybe they design it so no one finishes?” Bepo offered.

“That doesn’t help,” Law moaned. He stood up and weakly shook off Penguin and Shachi. Neither of them backed away, which he took in stride. “I still just sat an exam I didn’t finish—I always finish my exams.”

“Last time you finished an exam you were ten,” Penguin reminded him.

“Nuns don’t make it easy,” Law reasoned as though it was the most obvious thing in the world. Something sat in the pit of his stomach, seeped into his empty stomach and weary heart, and he frowned. Fuck… of all the things… “I don’t think I passed.”

“Can’t you retake it?” Bepo asked.

“In six months,” Law replied, “and I don’t want to stick around that long. We can’t afford it.”

“We’ll get there when we get there,” Penguin assured. “Now, what are we going to have for dinner? I’m fucking starved.”

Law laughed awkwardly as his friends began to discuss their dinner options, thinking that his sitting of the boards exam was cause for celebration. He allowed himself to be dragged along to the celebration, despite not feeling much like partying or eating, and spent the entire rest of the day and into the evening trying to calm himself down the best he could.

‘They know,’ he kept on thinking. He felt hyper-aware of everything—of everyone—as they sat in a pub with food and beer for the rest of the night. Bepo even had his first drink, much to the bear’s disgust, and provided the other two goobers with entertainment that lasted for hours.

“C’mon, Cap,” Shachi chuckled, his words on the verge of slurring. Law had lost count of how many beers any of them had, yet it was not enough for him to not cringe as his crewmate threw his arm over his shoulder and leaned in. “You gotta loosen up at some point tonight.”

“I don’t really feel like it,” Law replied for what was likely the dozenth time. “I don’t even really want to be here.”

“I don’t either,” Bepo squeaked. “I feel sick.”

“You barely finished your pint!” Penguin scolded.

“I’m sorry! It just tastes so gross!”

“Your first few pints are supposed to be gross.”

“I don’t think how it’s supposed to go…”

“Ah, we’ll make a man out of you yet,” Penguin scoffed. He looked at Law over the rim of his mug and shrugged. “Eat something; you look like you’re going to pass out.”

“No.”

“I don’t really think it counts as mutiny if I act for the good of the captain,” he reminded him. Law rolled his eyes and busied himself with one of the whale fritters that were still on the table. “Good. Now, what are we going to do about those bounty hunter-looking types across the room that have been eyeing us for about an hour?”

Okay, it made him feel a little better that it wasn’t just something that had buried its way into only his brain. He watched as both Penguin and Shachi went and stood, the pair deciding to let their captain and navigator sit this one out—they had to take care of the kids somehow, and this was something they definitely knew how to do even when drunk as they were.

Law went and Shambled some takeaway boxes to the table—he was not letting whale fritters, fries, and Flevench-style croquettes go to waste because the idiots got into some trouble.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

Three days passed by slowly. Painfully. It almost made Law go completely mad. He sat in their rented house the entire time, pacing the floor. When he wasn’t pacing, he was bouncing his leg as he sat, or tossing and turning on his bed, or just being restless in general. It was enough to make his crew crazy, almost wishing they had waited out the results while on the Polar Tang. In fact, Bepo had to sit on Law in order to keep him from rushing to the door when the mail courier arrived, leaving Penguin to get it and Shachi open the envelope.

It didn’t matter one way or the other—he passed.

…he passed, but with a caveat.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

“I NEED A STAMP! DOES ANYONE HAVE A STAMP?!”

Law’s shouting fell on deaf ears as the rest of the Hearts rested on the beach of the island they were docked at. He needed just one more to take care of the Coo fee and it seemed as though his reserves had run dry. At least it seemed as though the News Coo was taking advantage of the delay, the bird relaxing in the sun of the Summer Island’s Spring.

“DOES ANYONE HAVE A STAMP?” he repeated, doing his best to allow his voice to carry. No one paid him any heed; there was plenty to do with their time on land that facilitated the accidental ignoring of their captain. Sunbathing, volleyball, splashing in the water, setting up for the night’s big barbecue/bonfire… it was looking as though the crew was going to have a great afternoon on the tiny spit of an island they were resting on.

Except, suddenly, Law opened a Room and swapped his crewmates with a bunch of barnacles that had not yet been scraped off the top overdeck, dropping everyone rather unceremoniously onto the wooden planks.

“Ow! Hey! What’d you do that for?!” Ikkaku snapped.

“Since no one listened to me the first time, I had to resort to drastic measures,” Law reasoned. “Does anyone have a stamp? The Coo’s waiting.”

“Oh for fuck’s sake, I got it,” Clione griped. He went below deck, returning to the rest of the crew being back on land as he held a postage stamp towards his captain. Law took it and attached it to the front of the thick, buff-colored envelope along with four others before offering it to the News Coo. The bird regarded it sourly before squawking in resignation, allowing Law to put it in his bag. “What’s it about this time, Captain?”

“Vitamin D intake in correlation to heavy metal poisoning’s effects on the Human body,” Law explained as the Coo flapped off. “I needed so many stamps because I included two copies.”

“One by Trafalgar Law about Amber Lead and…?”

“…one by Doctor Wittman Lars about arsenic and mercury,” he admitted. “I don’t think the case study about Jean Bart’s tinea pedis and its correlation to his days in captivity is ready yet; still needs some refining in regards to outlining the causation.”

“The entire world isn’t ready for Jean Bart’s feet; subjecting Lvneel to it is just plain cruel,” Clione shuddered. “The snail photos you had me take still haunt my nightmares.”

“Be glad you weren’t around for the Bed Bugs or Mange Debacle,” Law reminded him. Clione nodded silently in reply—all he wanted from that was the stories and he didn’t even really want those.

[saltymarshmall0w]

Danny is "in denial" about the Waynes being vigilantes

Danny is really grateful for the Waynes taking him in and all but it’s just… it’s really obvious they’re vigilantes. Do they WANT him to find out? Why?? To join their battalion?

Hell nah. He’s already got enough going on trying to keep in check the many shades in the city.

Danny simply pretends to be oblivious about the Waynes being vigilantes. That's a future Danny problem.

It turns into Kyle levels of denial, where he ends up pretending he thinks the vigilantes are actors hired by the city to cover up all the ghosts haunting Gotham.

And obviously, the city bases them on the infamously growing Wayne family. It's so sweet of the Waynes to volunteer to dress up as their character for public appearances.

Meanwhile, Bruce has banned outright telling Danny even though it's been nearly a year of him living with them. So what if Danny glows sometimes and has full conversations with invisible people in dark alleyways, everyone has their quirks! so, the Batkids have resolved to just "accidentally" leave their mask on after patrol or make tactical plans loudly about taking down Penguin's latest scheme with Danny a room over.

-

“Is Dick coming to the Gala?” Danny asked as his head swiveled between his phone and the mirror as he attempted to tie his own tie. How did his mom always make it look so easy?

“No, he is going out as Batman tonight, since Father is unable to.” Damian responded. He may as well be blasé about their identities, seeing as Fenton was obviously both completely aware of their identities and completely in denial.

“Oh, man. Does that mean one of the “rouges” are going to attack the gala?” Danny asked, “It’s probably going to be that Two-face guy, huh? He hasn’t made an appearance in a while and his character arc with “Brucie” hasn’t made any progress in a while.”

“Nonsense, there is no predicting the mindset of a criminal like Two-face.” Damian ignored Danny’s disbelieving scoff as he maneuvered his newest brother to face him so he could take over the task for him, else they would be standing there all night. “Besides, Drake is in charge of security for the gala and will do an adequate job securing the venue. If you are afraid remain by my side where I can protect you.”

Damian tightened the tie around Danny's neck and stepped back to let Fenton pull his own collar down.

"That's very sweet of you, Dami." Danny reached up a hand and mussed up Damian's newly-gelled hair, garnering a growl and a shove from the boy. "But you should do normal kid things during the gala, like accidentally saying rude things to old ladies, or complaining about how bored you are, and don't forget to prank all the evil billionaires."

...

The “I told you so.” Danny brazenly mouthed to Damian later in the evening from where Two-face held a gun to his head was as infuriating as it was distressing.

—

(Kyle Weston is the fanon brother of Wes Weston (also a fanon character) who’s whole thing is that he believes in conspiracy theories like Wes, but doesn’t believe in ghosts at all to Wes’s frustration.)

[assandanattitude]

Look I may be a Zutara shipper, but why did they introduce the love tunnels where Katara and Aang share their first kiss A. In the wrong season/storyline and B. Without Aang? Like what the fuck man

[anditwasallyela]

Jason is one of the most distant in the family. No one really knows what happened after he got resurrected in the pit, and it's not like they'd ask. Jason was a pretty private man, after all.

In this AU, they don't know about anything that went down with the outlaws. Nothing with the LOA, either. So sometimes, a conversation will go down like:

--

Tim: Don't you think it's a bit weird that Penguin hasn't done anything as of late? What if he's planning something big? There hasn't even been a single appearance-

Jason *eating a sandwich*: He's in my walls.

Tim: Sorry- what?

Jason:

Tim: What the fuck did you mean by that?

Jason:

--

Dick *on the phone*: Hey, wanna go out for lunch this week? There's this case I have to speak to you about-

Jason: Sorry, I'm in Nepal right now.

Dick: Oh? You on some big solo case, or-

Jason: Nah, I was gonna visit my favorite magic cult, but then I ran into Talia and I haven't seen her in a bit so I doubt I'll be able to see you this week haha

Dick: What.

Jason: *hangs up*

--

I dunno, I just really like these kinds of AUs. The comedy is limitless.

[prlssprfctn]

What do you think about this?

I thought it...

Jason is emotionally adopted by every rogue, villain and enemy of Batman and the BatFam with the exception of the Clown

Like he can just annoy Tim by requesting Ra's to please give him Tim's spleen jar and show it to Tim before giving it back to Ra's.

Each bat kid has one rogue that is connected to them and Jason becomes the favorite of all Robins because... 1 is to be petty and 2 he broke down the enemies defenses and made himself their favorite.

Jason is petty like that.

i actually love this! funnily enough, i think Jason accidentally befriended a few of them even as Robin (an interesting detail: as Robin Jason was very inclined to believe that rogues of Gotham can actually change, while Bruce brushed him off; in one of comics, he really wanted to believe that Penguin had changed their ways, and, of course, he turned out to be wrong, and Bruce explained him that people like him don't change, but isn't it just *so* curious and feels like unintentional foreshadowing? especially, considering that Bruce pushes the "this kid would end up a criminal [or dead] if not for me" from the very beginning of Jason's arc?)

but back to the point, i absolutely love this headcanon. i don't think he will tolerate *all* of them (definitely not Penguin and Crane, I think; Harley, depending on how triggered he is just by Joker association), but the most? for sure. putting my bet that Selina and Pamela might be his favourite, actually.

the funniest part most of them are, like, nerds with PHD. that's exactly a type of people that will welcome his rants about books and law, politics and economy, and— you get it.

and then, there is Ra's. they are very annoying to each other, but they collaborate when they know that their ideas and duo will annoy others. Bruce is getting grey hair every time he knows Jason is at LoA again? Ra's announce that Jason is his grandson as well. Dick is getting a tick because Al Ghul's family is his least favourite family in the world? Jason *accidentally* mixes up chats and sends Dick his selfie with Ra's instead of Talia. bonus points: Dick hates that his chat is somewhere next to Talia, too.

do he also help rogues on occasions when he wants to annoy Bruce? sure.

Batman, trying to catch Selina after she stole something from city hall again:

Jason, calling him in the middle of the chase: Sos, emergency

Batman, pausing: Son? What's wrong?

Jason: I am stuck resolving Riddler's shit, and I really need help with the last one.

Batman: What is it?????

Jason: What cat says when Bat fails again?

Batman: Uh—

Jason, before hanging up dramatically: Don't be mean to your second son.

Batman: Excuse me—

Selina, hopping on a suspiciously familiar bike with a suspiciously familiar vigilante driving it: Muah!

Batman: Shit.

Dick, barging inside the Cave, furious: Had you managed to fight with Jason again?

Bruce: ...How did you know?

Dick: I've spent thirteen hours trying to resolve all Riddler's trials. Some of them were required to quote Jane Austin and fill blanks in Edgar Allan Poe's poems. HOW DO I KNOW?!? GO AND APOLOGISE, YOU STUPUD OLD MAN.

Bruce: ^_^

Red Hood and Riddler on the other side of town: (collective evil giggles)

Tim, sighing, because police asked Red Robin to regulate Poison's Ivy rally in front of CGDP building: Man, it is Sunday...

Tim, squinting at a familiar figure in leather jacket: Jason? What the fuck you are doing here? Are you under Ivy's pollen influence, too?

Jason, holding a big ass poster: Nah, man, just helping my girl Pam

Tim: ...Honestly. Whatever. I'll leave the territory to you.

[rip2mycarradio]

heyyyyy love love love the last oneshot! new request: 2025 harry smut

COLD SUNDAY

hi i’m SO sorry this took so long but it’s finally here!! warnings: fingering, lots of praise from harry. the ending is soooo shit i’m so sorry i never know!!!!

༺☆༻

it was the kind of day you both craved without realizing it. slow, quiet, and just yours.

the morning had started in that sun-drenched haze, all warm sheets and tangled limbs. harry had kissed you awake, slow and sleepy, his curls brushing against your cheek and his voice still heavy with sleep. it hadn’t taken much—just a soft “c’mere, love,” and a lazy graze of his hand beneath the hem of your shirt—to turn the moment into something intimate, something soft and slow and full of whispered i love yous. it wasn’t frantic, not rushed, not even close—it was just that sweet kind of love that feels like waking up in your favorite dream and deciding not to leave it.

now, hours later, the world outside was a blur of grey clouds and the occasional hush of passing cars, but inside harry’s flat, everything was still. quiet. calm. the TV glowed in front of you, playing some random nature documentary neither of you had really picked—you just liked the voiceover, the ocean sounds, the sense that time wasn’t moving.

you were curled in his lap, back leaned against his chest, your bare legs tangled over his. he’d thrown a hoodie over his boxers, arms wrapped lazily around your middle, his fingers gently resting on your stomach like they belonged there. and they did. his chin was propped on your shoulder, his breath steady and warm against your neck as he pressed the softest kiss just beneath your jaw every now and then, like he couldn’t help it.

“that’s a penguin, innit?” he murmured sleepily, pointing at the screen.

you squinted. “pretty sure that’s a puffin.”

“what’s the difference?” he mumbled, nuzzling closer.

“penguins don’t fly, babe,” you smiled. “puffins do.”

harry hummed in pretend shock, his lips brushing your skin. “well, color me educated.”

you giggled, your hand finding his and lacing your fingers together. “you really don’t pay attention to anything we watch, huh?”

“nah,” he said, lips now at your temple. “i’m watching you.”

you rolled your eyes, but your cheeks warmed instantly. “you’re so cheesy.”

“you love it,” he said, squeezing your hand.

you leaned your head back onto his shoulder, settling in deeper into the curve of his body, perfectly molded to yours. “yeah,” you whispered. “i do.”

the puffins continued diving on screen, but harry’s mind was elsewhere, evidently so as his fingers slipped beneath the soft fabric of your hoodie, tracing lazy circles over the bare skin of your waist.

"is that so?" harry whispered, his voice a low, gruff whisper, his fingers moving higher up your ribcage, teasingly grazing the underside of your breast.

“yeah,” you spoke, gasping softly when you finally felt his fingers grazing your soft flesh, the skin around his finger already rising with goosebumps. you peered up at him through thick lashes, looking up at him with a lot more curiosity than before. you let his hands explore, not paying any mind to it. “it is so.”

harry’s touch grew more firm, his fingers tracing a lazy path up to cup your tit, the heat of his palm causing your skin to flush.

"mmm," he hummed, his gaze darkening even further as he observed the way you looked up at him, your eyes wide and filled with a mixture of curiosity and anticipation. harry’s grip tightened, his thumb brushing over the sensitive nipple, feeling it harden beneath his touch, enjoying the way you writhed in his lap.

"puffin’s are cute, aren’t they?" he teased, his lips finding the sensitive spot between your shoulder and neck, nipping at it playfully.

“yeah, they are,” you spoke. harry truly loved when you got like this, trying to act casual, but it was hard; your breath coming out in soft, adorable pants, like a puppy, being a dead giveaway to your arousal. heat pooled in your belly as harry’s finger mindlessly played with your nipple, and you squirmed under his touch, your ass pressing against his already hard dick. “today’s been a good today.” you muttered, voice softer, a little more intimate. “i’ve missed your attention,”

harry knew that tone all too well, the tone you used when you were craving closeness, when you needed to be smothered with love and affection.

he smiled as he pulled you against him tighter, his arms encircling your waist, his chin resting on your shoulder. "i can give you that," he murmured into your ear, his breath hot against your cheek.

his fingers traced lazy patterns over your stomach, moving lower and lower with each pass, seeking out the soft flesh of your inner thighs. he whispered the sweetest, dirtiest things in your ear, causing you to giggle and squirm a little more. harry was chuckling softly at the sound of your noises, the sweet, infectious sound of your giggle warming his heart. his fingers continued to trace wicked patterns against your skin, drawing languid circles over the fabric of your panties.

"you like that, baby?" he murmured, his lips finding the spot behind your ear, his teeth grazing the pulse point there.

“mmmhm,” you drawled, spreading your thighs a little further, feeling the excitement rise in your chest. “does this mean i get your full attention?”

"you have my full attention, baby," he murmured, his fingers teasing the edge of your panties, just barely grazing the already damp fabric. “you have no idea how much i’ve missed this," he murmured, his hand slipping beneath the fabric, his touch finding your tender flesh. harry had been busy lately—restless in that way he got sometimes, with a suitcase always half-packed and a spark in his eyes that meant he was itching to go somewhere, anywhere. he’d been traveling to all different kinds of places, not necessarily for work, just to see the world. he’d always been like that; curious, romantic about new cities, the kind of person who���d get excited about the smell of foreign spices in the air or the way the light hit cobblestone streets just right at sunset, and so you guys hadn’t had enough time to just be … alone.

“are you lying?” you wanted to tease, wanted to make a little joke to keep the tone light but you were quickly cut off by a soft whimper as his middle finger dipped barely between your folds, testing the waters and seeing how much you’d let him get away with. harry even chuckled at your question, his gaze fixed on the way you bit your lip, your body arching under his touch.

"you know i never lie to you," he murmured, his tone soft and reassuring as he leaned in to whispers in your ear. "couldn't focus on anything else."

his finger traced a lazy circle over your sensitive clit, the touch light and teasing. "see? i’m very focused on you right now."

you whimpered, hips jerking at the lazy circle, your body unprepared for the slightest tease. “you’re trembling,” harry murmured, his voice tender as he continued to toy with your sensitive flesh. he could feel your body trembling just slightly beneath his touch, the effect he had on you a constant reminder of just how much you needed him.

"y’like that?" he whispered, his finger pressing down on your clit, applying just the right amount of pressure. “use your words, sweetheart.”

“yeah, i like that,” you breathed, eyes fluttering shut at the sensation, lips parting in a gasp that hardly left your lips. harry knew your needs like the back of his hand, and despite his initial teasing, he was always eager to fulfill them.

his lips traced a path down the curve of your neck, peppering your skin with open-mouthed kisses that left a trail of warmth in their wake. his touch was firm now, his fingers circling your clit with growing pressure.

"that’s it, baby," he murmured, his voice rough and low. "let me take care of you."

“o—“ your single word sentence was cut off by a soft hiccup, catching your breath before speaking. “okay.”

harry relished in the sound of your surrender, his touch growing bolder, his fingers slipping lower, tracing over your hole.

"that’s my good girl," he murmured approvingly, his lips finding the sensitive spot behind your ear. "just relax and let me make you feel good."

he knew how to drive you crazy, how to bring you right to the edge and keep you there, suspended in a state of delicious torment. his touch was skilled and sure, each movement a testament to the connection the two of you shared. when you rolled your hips with a soft whine, letting him know that you were over the teasing, he found genuine amusement in it.

"eager, aren't we?" he murmured, his voice rough with desire. his finger teased your entrance for a moment before slowly sliding inside, the sensation drawing a guttural moan from his lips. "god, you're so tight," he whispered, his forehead pressed against your neck. his touch was firm but tender, seeking out those sweet noises from you.

feeling his finger inside you was a such an intense feeling of fulfillment that you couldn’t even begin to explain. your chest felt tight, just silently spreading your thighs just a little further, to allow him further access with a soft moan. the sound of sent a shiver down harry’s spine, the heat of your pussy around his finger enough to drive him wild.

"y’always so sensitive," he murmured, almost in awe, his voice thick with desire. he curled his finger, searching for that sweet spot inside you, his touch growing more insistent.

“always know how to take care of me,” you muttered, your voice stuck in a permanent whine, gasping softly as he curled his digit, the tip of his finger reaching dangerously close to your g-spot. having his finger inside you was making him genuinely dizzy, just feeling how wet you were and how beautifully you fit around your finger, was overwhelming, despite how many times he’d done this with you.

harry’s heart ached with admiration at your words, finding the whine in your voice to make his cock throb with the need for attention. "i know, baby," he murmured, his voice tender as he pressed his lips to the slope of your neck. "m’gonna take care of you."

his finger continued to pump in and out of you, the wet, silken feel of your gummy walls making his eyes threaten to roll. he knew exactly what you needed, and he was going to give it to you. that being said he continued to pump his finger in and out of you, adding a second digit, the sound of your gasps and moans like music to his ears.

you gasped at the sensation, hips jerking slightly, your head falling back against his shoulder, almost a sign of surrender.

"that’s it," he murmured, his voice thick with desire. "let me in, baby. let me give you what you need." he continued to pump his fingers in and out of you, his movements quickening with the need to make you cum, his touch firm and skilled. he wanted to make you forget everything but him.

“harry—“ you gasped out his name as he curled his fingers, so deep inside you that he found that one spot that sent you into a completely different dimension.

his heart races at the sound of his name leaving your lips, his eyes fixed on your face as your body responds to his touch. “s’that it, baby?" he murmurs, his voice low and rough, his fingers pumping relentlessly. he knew exactly where that spongey little spot was, and he intended to hit it over and over again, until you were a trembling mess of pleasure.

you cried out softly, eyes slowly fluttering shut as your hand gripped his forarm, nails digging into his skin so hard, it was a shock that he didn’t bleed. your chest was tight, your stomach was even tighter—you were right there. he could sense you were on the verge of cumming, teetering on the edge and ready to fall. his touch grew even more insistent, his fingers moving with a deliberate purpose.

"that’s it, baby," he murmured into your ear, his voice rough and breathless. "let yourself go for me. let me… yeah. lemme take care of you.” he continued to target that spongy spot, his touch eager to bring you to the height of pleasure.

you came, hard, with a squeak and a gasp, your body trembling with the effort. his heart raced as he felt you cum all over his fingers, your noises being the most beautiful, and adorable sound he'd ever heard.

he held you close, his arms wrapped around you tightly, his lips pressing kisses to your neck and shoulders. he could feel your body trembling against him, your release leaving you quivering in the aftermath.

"good job, baby," he murmured, his voice thick with affection. "there’s my good girl."

༺☆༻

[honeylations]

KIM MINJEONG x FEM!READER

Prompt: you kept your pornstar job a secret from your curious roommate, but when an abrupt incident comes up a few minutes before filming, there was only one way to solve it

Warnings/Notes: pornstar reader, g!p Minjeong, unprotected sex, creampie, squirting, dirty talking

“Jeongie~ I’m off to work now. There’s chicken in the fridge if you’re hungry”

Your roommate pauses the penguin documentary she’s watching on the big screen to sit up on the couch and pout. “You’re working again? It’s like you don’t want to spend time with me”

“Of course I want to spend time with you, Jeongie! But it’s important for me to work otherwise we wouldn’t be living in this amazing apartment!” You reasoned with jazz hands as a bonus.

“Oh speaking of apartment. I have my share for this week’s rent. Did you want me to send it through your bank details or cash?” Your adorable roommate asked with her phone ready in her hand but you waved it off.

“I’ll cover your rent this week. Don’t pay me back I swear to God”

“Again?! Y/n this is the 3rd week you’ve covered for me and I don’t feel nice about it”

You shrugged. “I just got a good pay”

“Right. A good pay. What job is this Y/n”

Checking the time on your watch, you pouted cutely at your roommate. “I’m gonna be late. See you later, love you!”

Minjeong sighed and sat back into the couch, very much lost in thought. What kind of high paying job were you exactly working at to be covering rent so easily?

“The hell do you mean Yunjin cancelled?!” You yelled at the director who was panicking just as much as you.

“Look, all she told me was that it was a personal emergency. We’ve tried calling Kazuha and Minji but both girls are busy with other schedules so unless you know someone that can fill in last minute, we’re postponing this until next week”

Just as the director started to walk away, a bulb flashed over your head. “W-Wait director-nim, I know someone…Give me a couple seconds to call her okay?”

“Make it quick Y/n. I’m booked today”

Fishing out your phone, you pressed on Minjeong’s contact and she answered quicker than expected. “J-Jeongie?”

“Hey Y/n, you never usually call during your shifts. Is everything okay?”

“Jeongie I really~ need your help with something but I can’t tell you what it is until you come here”

There was a short silence from the other line. “Uh…Okay? What’s your address?”

“I’ll message it after the call. Look your best”

Minjeong stared at her phone with confusion when you hung up. Look her best? Minjeong has little to no sense of fashion other than the millions of oversized flannels and cargo pants sitting in her closet.

Thankfully already showered, she simply put on a black and grey flannel with baggy jeans before checking the address you sent and driving her way over.

Moments later she was walking into the huge building, finding you on a set that looked like a bedroom, surrounded by unfamiliar faces.

“Y/n?” She questioned almost breathlessly once she realised you were only wearing a bathrobe.

“Jeongie! Thank you for coming. Now listen, I’ll cut this as short as I can because we don’t have much time, but I’m a pornstar, okay?”

“What?!”

“That’s why I’m loaded with money. The person that I was supposed to be filming with today cancelled on me and I couldn’t think of anyone else to replace her other than you”

Minjeong took a step back with wide eyes. “Nah uh, no way Y/n! What makes you think I’m good enough to film porn?!”

You quickly took her hands out of comfort. “I’m sorry for putting you on the spot last second, but this is highly important to me Jeongie..” you pleaded and Minjeong couldn’t resist.

The taller girl stared into your eyes then the pout of your lips.

She let out a heavy sigh and squeezed your hands. “Fine. I’ll do it”

You squealed and jumped into a hug, peppering her face with kisses. “Thank you thank you thank you! You’re the best!”

“You owe me big time” Your roommate pointed a finger, making you giggle.

“Of course! Now head into that room with our staff. They’ll help you prepare”

In a blink of an eye, Minjeong was in her ‘costume’ (which was nothing but a black shirt and grey sweatpants) while sitting on the edge of the bed.

You wore a white camisole with no bra underneath and baby pink panties, standing in front of Minjeong with a big smile. “Hey you”

“I feel weird Y/n. I-I don’t know if I can do this anymore” She cutely mumbled, eyes darting across the room in fear.

Minjeong felt your small hands cup her face, forcing her to look at you. “Relax, baby. I’ll take good care of you I promise”

“W-What’s the storyline anyways”

“None actually. Just a wholesome home sex video”

“Whenever you’re ready Y/n” the director called out, making you nod.

Your hands rubbed gently at Minjeong’s nape and slowly going down to her shoulders for a reassuring squeeze.

“You can do whatever you want to me” you whispered against your friend’s lips and then closing the gap to get a proper taste.

You were surprised to feel Minjeong kiss back eagerly like an expert, even sliding her tongue in as she grabbed your hips and pulled you to sit on her lap.

For a couple minutes you two were sucking each others faces.

And the next minute you were sucking her surprisingly huge cock. She had your hair fisted in a make shift ponytail, throwing her head back when her tip rubbed at the back of your throat. “Fuck Y/n, I should’ve known you were a whore”

Oh? That was new.

Your so called innocent Minjeongie dirty talking? Your cunt clenched around nothing.

Minjeong forced you off her dick to pin you down on the bed, lightly pecking the hickies she had left around your neck and collarbones. “You got me so down bad, Y/n-ie. I don’t think I’ll ever want to stop having you like this”

Whimpering beneath her, you held onto her shoulders tightly. “Have me anytime you want Minjeongie”

“Ain’t that sweet of ya” She smirked as her eyes were fixed onto your glossy ones, confusing you slightly.

Then you felt the pleasurable stretch in your pussy when Minjeong’s cock welcomed itself inside, arching your back in the process. “What the fuck, Jeongie, you’re so big a-ahh!”

“The biggest you’ve ever had, darl?” Your roommate tilted her head, trying not to let your tightness get the best of her.

“Mhm the biggest!”

“Good. Then I’ll make sure your pussy is only made to take me”

You littered Minjeong’s back with scratches that started to bleed out, clearly seen from the camera crew which they zoomed in on. The pain didn’t bother Minjeong, not when she had started pounding into you mercilessly.

She licked her lips at your boobs bouncing with each thrust. She just couldn’t resist sucking on them like a baby, addicted to how sexy they looked when wet with her spit.

“Your pussy is sucking me in so fucking good, baby” Minjeong panted in your ear.

Then she felt a sudden warmth spray all over her lower body.

You were squirting while moaning Minjeong’s name, even reaching down to ferociously rub at your clit to ride out your mind blowing orgasm.

“F-Fuck that’s so hot, Y/n” Minjeong hissed, not planning to stop her hips even after you came.

“W-Wait Jeongie—AH!” You tried to stop her but she couldn’t care less about how sensitive you were.

She laid you on your stomach, bringing your ass up and going back to destroying your pussy, feeling herself go deeper with the new position.

“Fuck! Fuck Minjeong-ah! You’re gonna break me!” You sobbed into the pillow that you were drowning with drool.

Minjeong laid over your back and drilled impossibly deeper. “Fucking take it whore. I own this pussy now”

Then you felt a sudden sting on your shoulder blade, realising Minjeong was biting down into your skin. Not hard enough to bleed, but hard enough to leave a long lasting bruise.

“Y/n…hah Y/n, I’m gonna fucking cum…”

Your insides became hot from the cum she blew into your cunt and thankfully your roommate’s hips were coming to a stop.

“Shit…Fuck that was so good, Y/n. Thank you” Minjeong whispered in your ear, kissing it afterwards.

“CUT! This was probably the best one you’ve filmed Y/n! Great job!…Y/n?” The director called but was left with no answer.

Minjeong frowned and leaned further down to look at your face. “Y/n? He’s talking to you”

You were knocked out cold. Little snores and whimpers escaping your lips with Minjeong’s cock still inside your abused cunt. “Has this happened before?” Minjeong asked the staff, and they all shook their heads.

“No, never. You must’ve really fucked her good”

“O-Oh no, I’m sorry! W-What should I do?” Minjeong panicked and made sure she didn’t move so much as you slept below her.

“Wow, you’re very different to how you were on camera. I like it. Ever considered taking this as a full time job?”

Minjeong put a hand up, completely declining the offer. “Appreciate it, but I was only willing to do this for Y/n”

Director nodded and placed a finger on his chin. “Interesting. Hope Y/n brings you over more in the future. You two can rest there for a bit longer while we pack up”

The short hair girl nodded and pulled her cock out as slow and gently as she could to not wake you up. Then she laid you on her chest with the covers covering both bodies. “Can’t wait to do this with you again, Y/n” Minjeong smiled and kissed your head, letting the sleepiness take over her too.

[lea-andres]

I'm seeing people complaining about Oswalda's name. Which like, yeah, lazy genderbend naming strategy, I've been on the internet long enough to know it when I see it, but we have to agree it's gonna keep the stupid dudebros from arguing it's not REALLY the Penguin or it's a different Penguin or some shit.

Nah, she's Oswald Cobblepot. They tacked on an A and made her a milf. Die mad while I desire her carnally.

[nightprompts]

&. 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐩𝐞𝐧𝐠𝐮𝐢𝐧 (𝐞𝐩𝐬. 𝟏-𝟒) 𝐬𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬.

(  dialogue  prompts  taken from episodes 1 - 4  of max's  the  penguin  (2024),  created  by  lauren  lefranc.  feel  free  to  edit  and  change  as  you  seem  fit.. )

❛ i see you've made yourself at home. ❜

❛ so this new deal you got going... maybe i can help. ❜

❛ you know what i like most about you? you are who you are. you couldn't change if you tried. ❜

❛ you got a girl? good looking guy like you... ❜

❛ can you imagine? to be remembered like that? revered? ❜

❛ you really think people’d make a float of your dumb face and march it down the street, chanting your goddamn name? ❜

❛ you messed with the wrong fucking guy on the wrong fucking night. ❜

❛ you’re gonna do everything i say. or else i’ll murder you and, uh... anyone you care about. ❜

❛ what do you think of this? it’s a little air freshener. aqua paradise. you smell it? ❜

❛ we used to go there every day in the summer. you know, we’d mix the flavors for a suicide. you ever mix the flavors? ❜

❛ i ain’t trying to get in your business, but... i need an alibi. ❜

❛ i asked for extra pickles, and they give me two? so what, a normal amount of pickles is one? makes no goddamn sense. ❜

❛ there’s a nice sunrise behind you. you should take a look. ❜

❛ i could help you with whatever it is. whatever you need, whatever it is, all right? ❜

❛ well, maybe it’d be useful, keeping you around. for now. ❜

❛ but if you step out of line just once, i swear to god, i’ll gut you like a fucking fish. do you understand? ❜

❛ all right, listen, if i don’t come out... nah, i’ll be fine. you’ll be fine. it’s gonna be fine. ❜

❛ you know, maybe you don’t like me. that’s fine. i’m an acquired taste. ❜

❛ i’ve been rehabilitated. ❜

❛ you’ve really moved up in the world, haven’t you? ❜

❛ are you nervous? i’d hate for you to feel nervous with me. ❜

❛ you know, people underestimate you, but not me. i’ve always known you were capable of more. ❜

❛ this city is meant to be yours, sweetheart. what are you gonna do to get it? ❜

❛ the world wasn’t built for guys like us. that’s why we gotta take whatever we decide is ours. ❜

❛ but i gotta know. no bullshit. can i count on you to pull through? ❜

❛ i know who you are. i know what you are. i don’t work with people whose loyalty is for sale. ❜

❛ i’m gonna run this goddamn city. and i want you in on it. ❜

❛ i'm not safe. i'm home. ❜

❛ very, very convenient that, all of a sudden, you’re on my side. ❜

❛ you are scrambling for whatever dignity you have left and you’re hoping i will save you. ❜

❛ rough night, detective? ❜

❛ i refuse to let these old fucking men push me aside again, like i’m nothing. so, i’m going to take from them now. ❜

❛ you in? ❜

❛ let's dance. ❜

❛ you act like wanting more is a bad thing, but, i mean, don’t you want a better life than this? ❜

❛ are we, uh, kinda... partners now? ❜

❛ i mean, you fucked up. huge. but you learned, right? ❜

❛ whaddaya think the new clothes are for? you’re my guy. can’t have you lookin’ like a schmuck. ❜

❛ and from now on, you want something, you ask for it. ❜

❛ how’s anyone supposed know your worth unless you tell ’em, huh? ❜

❛ man of the hour, i was just thinking about you... ❜

❛ you do anything stupid, i’ll sense it. ❜

❛ that’s why you’re here. you seem to know everybody’s business. so, now’s your time to shine. ❜

❛ you’ve got a good thing going here. i’m really happy for you. ❜

❛ i know you’re not right in the head. i mean, that’s pretty damn clear. but i’m not scared of you. ❜

❛ you think i’d come here empty-handed? come on, we both know that if i ever truly left you hanging, there'd be a bullet between my eyes. ❜

❛ i got a real opportunity for you here, but it’s kinda hard to focus with a gun pointed at my face. ❜

❛ you got fight in you. you gotta let it out. ❜

❛ you’re fun at a card game, or over drinks, i’ll give you that. but people don’t keep you around because they think you’re smart. and they sure as shit don’t trust you. ❜

❛ i wouldn’t ask you to do this if i didn’t know you could handle it. i believe in you, kid. ❜

❛ i can't tell who wants this move. me or you. ❜

❛ i want this for you. ❜

❛ what you did to me. was it worth it? did you get everything that you wanted? ❜

❛ you wanna go, what are you waiting for? fuckin’ go. ❜

❛ you coulda left whenever you wanted. but you chose to stay. how about you ask yourself why. ❜

❛ i fucked you over. that what you wanna hear? ❜

❛ i’m fuckin’ sorry for everything that’s happened to you. ❜

❛ you meant something to me. still do. ❜

❛ i don’t know where to go from here. i don’t know how to trust you. ❜

❛ you need a cigarette, take the edge off? ❜

❛ a lobotomy couldn’t take the edge off. ❜

❛ when the time comes, i want you to take my place. i want you to run this family... if that’s something that would interest you. ❜

❛ they know you're mine. they'll do as i say. ❜

❛ why would you do this now? picking away at old wounds... you know how it upsets me. ❜

❛ you still haven’t told me what you want for your birthday. ❜

❛ i don’t need your advice. i don’t care what you think. no one does. you are my driver. that is all you are. so stop talking and drive. ❜

❛ listen, i get that you’re angry, you know. but i was just doing my job, looking out for you. ❜

❛ i’m not gonna make it in a place like that. i’m gonna die in there. ❜

❛ it’s okay to be scared. i was scared at first, too, but it’s not so bad here. you get used to the noises. ❜

❛ a woman beat the shit out of me while everyone stood around and watched. so, yeah, i had an incident. ❜

❛ i don’t know how to convince you i’m sane when you’ve already made up your mind about me. ❜

❛ i told you i’m fucking innocent. ❜

❛ i’m gonna get you something to eat. if you wanna get cleaned up, there’s a towel and a change of clothes in the guest bath upstairs. ❜

❛ i trusted him... when everything in my body told me not to. i should have killed him when i had the chance. ❜

❛ you abandoned me. ❜

❛ i left because i had to. because i could. i know you didn’t have that choice, but I’m here now. ❜

❛ you don’t have to pretend with me. ❜

❛ i haven’t forgotten, you know? the way you looked at me. so curious. ❜

❛ what did it feel like? to get to watch a person unravel? and now, you’re numbing yourself as punishment. ❜

❛ they think i'm broken. i'm not broken. ❜

❛ i'm not the one who's sick. and neither are you. the world is. ❜

❛ for the first time, i have hope. ❜

❛ to new beginnings. cent’anni. ❜

[earlysunshines]

secret rhymes - 21. what’s good korea (half written)

a/n: i quote that nicki minaj line sooo often and also the texts at the end are in anton’s pov!!

“isn’t it cool?” you ask, watching anton tilt his head.

he rubs his eyes tiredly, you two have been spending the whole day together after he decided to surprise you so suddenly.

you’ve just made him watch both of the ditto music videos—twice. throughout the second watch, you would mansplain different details and things that stood out to you. anton listened intently.

“what’s got you so into them?” he questions, watching you find a performance video to watch. “i mean the music is good but this is so… sudden?”

you shake your head, stabilizing anton’s ipad as you press play again.

“you wont believe it, i’ve got so much to tell you.”

“more?” anton says, although it sounds like he’s sick of you—you roll your eyes at him.

“yes more. it’s about when i went to see yunjin not so long ago.”

“ah. oh, by the way, is she spending new years with us?”

“not sure, i think she has a schedule. i’ll text her later—but anyways let me tell you the story.”

and so you continue, telling anton about the events that happened when you went to see yunjin. you tell him about meeting a girl and finding out that the girl happens to be hanni. you even rewind the video while you recall everything, pointing to the girl you met that’s dancing on the screen.

anton’s never been so in awe and in shock simultaneously. he’s showing the most emotion you’ve seen throughout the day.

you tell him about how nervous hanni had been, how sweet she was, and mention that you think she’s really cute too. anton doesn’t miss the last comment, and neither does he point it out.

“okay so that’s… insane.” anton responds, processing the story. “but cool.” he adds.

“i know, right?”

anton stares at the screen, the song continuing on as he thinks to himself.

“y/n,” he mumbles.

you turn your head. “yeah?”

“maybe hanni was nervous because she’s a fan of you.”

“nah, no way.” you wave him off. “she was probably just tired from… idol things. when i ran into her it was a few days after ditto released. her schedule must’ve been packed—yunjin tells me everything about comeback eras. they’re insane.”

“seems tough. but yeah, there’s a possibility.”

you shrug, watching the video end. “maybe. i doubt it though.”

masterlist ; previous - next

taglist ! @namojoon @ly-gushka @layonaiguess @sonotcopingatall @artrizzler19 @yerimbrit @sixflame438 @nwjnsloona @saysirhc @nimnia @somedaydream @trovao-penguins @modanisgf @c-yerim @starstruckgoateepuppy @tzuyusdoughnut @kaypanaq @peranoo @haerinkisser @electronicluminarycoffee @yoohtonyy @secretcessy @keiji-jin @awkwardtoafault @syronns @linnnsworld

[rizzanon]

You know what would be funny? Is that reader would be the prime target of villains and even the rouges for a sidekick-join-me-to-the-darkside sales pitch because

A) she could be molded into what they wanted her to be due to her wanting validation

B) she's determined. Girlie got the guts even if she lacks skill

C) she's just fun to be around even if she only shows up in slow nights

Ivy and her share gardening tips (more like Ivy gives her a crash course in botany every time they met), which she later on shares to Alfred

Harley will always try to psycho analyze her, and her emotions whenever she's not busy blocking Joker's attempt to catch the lonely bat away from her nest, she can he Harley Junior, don't ya think sugarplum? (Like bitch get away from the child?!?!?!)

Catwoman couldn't count the times she had to teach stealth to this girl and how to have quick hands. (Why is Batman allowing this baby out????? Imma keep this kid in a spiky bubble wrap)

Two-face likes her. He can see the conflict she has within herself and would love to see how she turns out. Would it be Heads (she gets what she wants [Validation] but would break her) or Tails (she gets what she needs [self appreciation] but would break those around her). They have lengthy debates on whether Gothamites are immortal at this point or not

The Riddler is somewhat reluctant to fight her because the girl can't even do Sudoko for God's sake (she just doesn't want to answer it in front of him) Now he teaches her how to say what she wants without actually saying it. Bro just gives her lessons in riddles and problem-solving better than the bats did with her "training"

Killer Croc won't hurt the kid who's been feeding him A grade Wagyu since she was a toddler who accidentally dropped the grocery bag she wants told to hold because she's a big girl now. Now they just have this truce whenever she slips some bags of meat down the sewers that Alfred definitely didn't notice

Bane, just straight up, don't want to interact with the puny kid that word on the streets feeds Croc and has fun time spa sessions with Ivy, Harley, and Catwoman not that he's afraid of course. He just doesn't want to steal the little peace the others have whenever she's around

The Penguin likes to have her around because she got the skills in handling business like the Lounge (props to all the lessons she has with Lucius in how to deal with the company and playdates with Tam)

Mr. Freeze likes her ideas on how to cure Nora it may be unorthodox or out of the box, sometimes like putting her in a Laz pit, but no, it would make you indebt to Ra's so that's a no to idea 156 then

Clayface likes how she acts like her acting skills and would want to hone it

Scarecrow would like to have a new test subject

Mad Hatter would like an Alice

Joker can go fvck himself

Like do you see my vision or nah

Anyways, I'm just whispering some ideas in your head wooooo~~~~~

putting this out here because this is way too good anon holy shit i love this sm. though i wouldn’t say that undoing fate reader has this sort of relationship with gotham’s villains/ rogues, this will definitely be a very good what if to write about LOL. also spoilers¿? catwoman, ivy, harley, penguin and two face will definitely make an appearance in undoing fate (probably chapter 8/9/10, haven’t really fully drafted those chapters yet) im not sure if im planning to have the other of gotham’s rogues and villains appear in undoing fate, but this is what i’ve planned so far HAHA

[haru-kuneko]

Sneak Peek on DMC Season 2 ... Nah, just kidding!

Don't you just hate it when you're enjoying a trip to the Vatican until a nearly eight-foot-tall Easter bunny shows up? Here's Scratch (who works as an employee at the museum) and BOB being confronted by Rabbit.

By the way, this might be my last time posting content related to Rabbit so I can push for more book-related content.

P.S. To anyone asking if I take commissions, make sure you're a legit person and your profile contains enough information telling me what company, origin and the kind of services you offer complete with contact info. I don't use PayPal due to safety reasons.For example, [First name/Last name] from the Penguin House Department in Australia looking for a book cover artist who can do a vector-esque art style. I wanna know who you really are and if you got any references. Don't just say you wanna hire me or I'll block you. Also, if you wish to share my art, please give credit. DO NOT REUPLOAD!

[xxchaosjojoxx]

Smash or Pass (Penguin x f! Reader) Part 1(?)

Rated: T, mild cursing, mention/hint of sexual content!!!!

A/N: ok ok it was supposed to be a fun little fluff thing. But it turns out a little spicier as expected. And I’m so unsure if I should do a nswf followup part. I never wrote smut before but I would love to finish the story completely.

Penguin and Shachi were on deck when they heard loud laughter. Both men were on their way towards you, Ikkaku and Bepo, sitting near the railing. Tears streamed down your faces while you couldn’t help but laugh.

“Did something funny happen?” Shachi asked. Ikkaku and you were glancing at him. “We were roaming around the city and now we learned a new trend.” Ikkau said and couldn’t help but laugh once more.

“I don’t understand it completely but the two of them have so much fun. This makes me happy.” Bepo said while smiling.

“And what trend?” Penguin asked, looking at his crewmates with a light smile.

“There is something young people play with the name ‘Smash or pass’. The girls we met near a cafe were asking each other names, and then the rest of them answered.” You explained and couldn’t help but grin.

Shahci and Penguin were confused. “And this is funny because…?” Shachi asked and Ikkaku and you laughed once more.

“Wait wait I’ll explain it.” Ikkaku said and tried to stay calm. “It seems like they ask each other which person they would smash or pass. Aka if you would be up for spending the night together you would smash the person. If you don’t feel physical attraction you pass. And those girls were playing it. It was really fun to watch them. They were blushing for revealing their crush on certain boys or laughing while they didn’t expect some answers.”

“Ok I guess we get it.” Penguin said and nodded towards Shachi “I still don't get why you two can’t stop laughing about it.”

Ikkaku giggled once more. “We weren’t the only ones watching.”

You couldn’t help but snicker. “There were a few other pirates, watching them. And as soon as our eyes met, they grinned like disgusting pieces of shit and tried ‘playing this game’ with us. And then.-” “Let me continue please.” Ikkaku interrupted you with a big grin. “So these men were trying to be flirty and saying stuff like ‘I would smash both of you’.” Shachi and Penguin couldn’t help but flinch a little bit. Thinking about some random dudes trying to make a move on both of you, ignited a little rage inside them. “Oh is that so?” Shachi tried to stay calm. “So did you ehh….” “Stop right there Shach!” Ikkaku shouted and Shachi took a step back by surprise. “Of course we answered with the only correct answer.” Ikkaku and your gaze met as you said the next words in union.

“We would prefer smashing your head against the next wall.” Both of you said while laughing once more.

“Oh man, I would’ve loved to see their faces after this.” The red hair grinned, feeling relaxed after hearing this.

“It was hilarious, Shachi.” You answered. “It sure was a fun thing. Didn’t know that this would be a thing.”

Shachi sat down next to Bepo. “Maybe this would be a fun game for us.”

You stopped laughing, while looking at the red hair. “Nah, this wouldn’t be funny.”

Shachi and Penguin were tilting their heads in confusion. “Why’s that?” Both men asked.

Ikkaku stood up, stretching her arms. “Y/N, wouldn’t smash anyone.” Ikkaku grinned.

You stood up as well, laughing. “That’s not true. I would smash someone for sure…I think.” “Yeah, you think. You could maybe go for the cook of the strawhats.”

Penguin felt a sting in his chest, after hearing your cheerful laugh. “Smashing someone for food? Nah. Is he attractive? Yeah. But I wouldn’t smash him just for this.” You said and Shachi and Penguin felt out of place.  “Maybe we should play it just with our crew.” Shachi said. ”Oh come on. We all know that the most attractive person here is our captain. Everyone would smash Law. Even you two. There is no other option. At least for me and y/n.” Ikkaku was looking at Bepo. “Maybe for Bepo as well…” She whispered while Shachi felt bitter. “Hey I am attractive as well.” You hummed. “That’s not true, Ikka.” You said and everyone was looking at you. Shachi jumped up, holding your hand and being absolutely happy about it. “So you would smash me as well?” He looked at you with such anticipation and a wink. You tried to escape his grip. “Sorry for destroying your hope, Shach.” You said with a reassuring smile.

Penguin couldn’t help but pat Shachi’s shoulder. “Sorry to hear that, man.” He said and was smiling. He didn’t know why, but he was happy to hear that you never consider having a one night stand with his best friend. “Who would you smash except for Law, y/n?” Shachi asked and everything was silent. Waiting for your answer. With a nonchalant look on your face and a shrug your answer escaped your mouth way too fast. “Penguin of course.”

Penguin choked on his own spit and even Shachi and Ikkaku were dumbfounded.

“Wait what?” Shachi and Ikkaku shouted. “Aren’t you guys listening? The only person I would smash is Penguin.” You said.

All of them were pretty confused. “But why?” Ikkaku asked a little louder than intended. “Yeah, I love this dude don’t get me wrong.” Shachi said and patted Penguin’s shoulder. “But you never saw his full face, do you?” You tilted your hand slightly to the side.

“Why? Because he’s hot. Cute, funny and hot.” Your voice didn’t show any hint of emotions. 

The man with the penguin hat felt weird and gulped. “I have to go” Penguin mumbled and fled inside the Polar Tang. Without thinking you ran after him. “Wait up please.”

You shouted and could see him quicken his pace while shaking his head.

You did a jump and could catch his sleeve. You were panting. “If I offend you somehow, I am sorry.”

Penguin froze while trying to escape your grip. “I have stuff to do. So please let go of me.”

You shock your head. “This is bullshit and you know it. Just look at me please.”

He sighed and his voice sounded desperate. “Don’t let me repeat myself please.” He gritted through his teeth. You loosened your grip and he took a few steps.

Once more you were behind him, jumping suddenly in front of him, looking at his bright red face. As soon as your gaze met he couldn’t help but turn around once more.

“What’s the prob-” You wanted to ask and were looking at him. As your gaze shifted down his body you saw it. There you saw a bulge in his lower body part.“Is that….?”

He cleared his throat. “Yes it is. What do you expect?” He sounded angry, yelling at you. As soon as he saw you flinch at the fact that he just raised his voice he sighed. “I am sorry. But I’m not immune to this. Hearing that a beautiful and funny girl like you, thinks that I am hot. Hotter than Law...I am just a man ok? Saying this kinda stuff…what do you expect?”

The silence was heavy between both of you.

“Just let me take a quick shower ok? I’m not mad at you or anything. I’m flustered if you really mean it, it is.”

You look into his bright red face, his hand scratching the back of his neck while he shifted with his whole body. “I mean every word of it. I do find you attractive.”

He tried to hide his face. “You make it worse right now…If you excuse me now.”

Penguin was near the bathroom door, the knob in his hand already.

As he wanted to enter the bathroom your voice interrupted his next move. “I can take care of this as well.”

Penguin shook his head. “Fuck. Don’t mess with me right now please. This is hard enough.”

You took a deep breath, closing the gap between you two and hugging him lightly from behind.

“I mean it. I could…help you to fix it.”

You stuttered and your voice was trembling.

Feeling his heartbeat under your fingertips you realize how fast his heart was actually beating.

“Yeah sure. Listen y/n, I know that you feel guilty but you don’t have to. We just played a little game, or at least tried to and you answered. Just let it go please. I don’t wanna imagine naked grandmas or a naked Bepo or whatever you have in mind.”

You pressed yourself closer on his back. A soft laugh escaping you.“I mean it differently. I don’t feel guilty. I want… to fix it. Without having you imagine some crazy shit. I mean it physically. Not because this is my fault.” Your voice was a mere whisper the more you spoke.

Penguin managed to turn himself around in your arms, looking down on you. Your big eyes were looking at him with such a loving and flustered expression.

“Ok this is definitely a dream. Maybe I have a fever dream. Or I hit my head or something like that.”

You shook your head. “This is real, Pen. Not a dream or imagination. This is happening for real right now.” Your face felt hot while trying to look at him.

“There is no way, this is real.”

“PENGUIN!” You tried to yell and he yelped. “I do find you hot and attractive. I think you are a funny and cute guy. I love being around you. This is more than just physical attraction. At least for me. I wouldn’t do it just because I feel guilty or just because I find you attractive. I…I would do this because it’s you…God this is so embarrassing…” You said and were slightly trembling.

Penguin managed to slap his face loud enough for you to jump back, looking at him terrified. “Maybe if I slap myself hard enough I’ll wake up…or the problem will go away on its own.”

You took his hand in yours, caressing his hand with your fingers. “Don’t hurt yourself please.”

He looked at you, smiling softly, his voice sounded so desperately and his breathing became heavy. “What else am I supposed to do then? I don’t know what I should do. I don’t know…” His head rested on top of yours. His lips kissing you softly on top of your hair. “I don’t know what the right thing to do is…” His hand was squeezing yours.

“It’s your decision.” You whispered and he nodded slightly. “Am I a bad person for wanting you to help me? For thinking about being intimate with you? I don’t wanna take advantage of you or our friendship. I don’t want it because I’m desperate or horny or something like this.” His voice wasn’t loud but his words sent a shiver down your spine and a flame inside your tummy began to spark.

“I know that. I know what type of person you are. I know you wouldn’t do it just for the cause.”

“I don’t want our relationship to change…at least not in a negative way. I like you way too much for this.”

Your heart made a little jump hearing those words. You never knew for sure if you would develop a crush on Penguin or not. But now you were sure about this. Without knowing when or how exactly. You just knew that you fell for him. He took a step back, looking sadly on the ground. Your hand caressed his cheek softly. “I feel the same way.” Your faces become closer, you could feel his warm breath on your skin, your noses touching while your lips are lightly brushing against each other. As soon as your lips were touching, you kissed him slowly and hesitantly. After just a few seconds you pulled apart, with half lidded eyes you looked at him. “You’re not a bad person, Penguin.” With that his lips were on yours once more, his right hand trying to open the nearest door while his left hand was holding your back, deepening the kiss. You followed him into the room, without breaking the kiss. The only sound you could hear was your heartbeat and the door closing.

[itzsyds]

riccardo calafiori x reader going shopping together in central London and he spoils his girl always and when they go home they have a cute cuddle and reader makes him match pyjamas with her and have nice snacks just cute and fluffy really

Riccardo Calafiori x Reader

Always yours🥹

—

This was a cute one to write for Cala✍️ Tysm anon for the request! Hope what I wrote did it justice x

—

—

FLUFF- A cozy, love-filled day in Central London with Richy turns into a dreamy night of matching pyjamas, snacks, forehead kisses, and all the affection in the world. Because when he spoils you, it’s not just with gifts— it’s with love.

—

Central London had that soft hum in the air— a mix of taxi horns, chatter, and distant music from street performers.

The sky was grey, clouds stitched thick above the rooftops, but you were warm. More than warm, really.

You were glowing, bundled up in your favorite coat, your gloved hand tucked into Riccardo’s much larger one as you walked side by side down Oxford Street.

He looked unfairly good, as always— scarf wrapped loosely around his neck, curls tucked under a beanie, cheeks slightly pink from the wind. He squeezed your hand gently as you paused outside yet another shop window.

“See something you like?” he asked, already stepping toward the door.

You chuckled. “I was just looking—”

“That’s all I need.” He flashed you a grin and pulled you inside.

That was how your day went. Every time you glanced at something, he noticed. If your eyes lingered on a bag, he was already lifting it off the shelf. If you admired a ring or scarf or pair of boots, they somehow made it into a shopping bag five minutes later.

“Richy,” you said at one point, half-laughing, half-exasperated as he handed over his card again, “this is a little excessive.”

He leaned closer, brushing a kiss against your temple. “You deserve to be spoiled. Let me do it.”

There was something about the way he said it— gentle, certain, like spoiling you was his favorite hobby. You melted a little more every time.

At one point, you passed a tiny, tucked-away bookstore. You stopped, pulling him toward it. The two of you wandered between shelves, you flipping through poetry and him pretending to look serious while holding a romance novel.

“Hey,” he whispered, holding up a book titled ‘Love Letters to the Moon’. “This feels like something I’d write you if I could string two sentences together.”

You rolled your eyes playfully. “You’re better than love letters. You give me forehead kisses and carry all my shopping bags.”

He laughed. “Hard to argue with that.”

As the late afternoon dimmed into early evening, the two of you stopped for pastries and hot chocolate at a cozy café. He stirred your drink for you without asking, blowing gently on the surface before sliding it across the table.

“You’re unreal,” you muttered, heart full to the brim.

He smiled lazily. “Nah. Just in love.”

—

The moment you stepped inside your flat, everything softened. The fairy lights you'd hung around the ceiling glowed like warm stars, and the scent of cinnamon drifted from the candles he'd insisted on buying.

Shoes kicked off, bags forgotten, you disappeared into your room and came back holding something behind your back.

“Okay,” you announced, eyes sparkling. “I present to you… tonight’s pyjama options.”

You held up two sets. One had penguins in Santa hats, the other was baby blue with fluffy clouds and suns. Both came with matching fuzzy socks and eye masks.

Riccardo blinked. “We’re really doing this?”

You nodded. “Yes. Pick. Your relationship depends on it.”

He laughed, shaking his head. “Then clouds. Obviously.”

You handed him the set, watching with a fond little smile as he slipped into the pyjamas without even pretending to protest. The fact that he looked ridiculously good in something so silly only made you fall harder.

The living room turned into a haven. Blankets layered like a fort, snacks spread out like a feast— popcorn, crisps, chocolate buttons, sour gummies, everything you both loved. A classic Disney movie played softly in the background, but honestly, neither of you paid much attention.

You were curled into him, his arms wrapped around you from behind, legs tangled beneath the blanket. His fingers traced lazy circles on your knee, the occasional press of a kiss to your hair, cheek, neck— anywhere he could reach.

“I could stay like this forever,” he murmured.

“Good,” you whispered, “because I’m never letting go.”

He smiled against your skin. “What if we just stayed in this flat forever? Lived on snacks. Wore matching pyjamas every day. You pick the movies, I’ll pick the snacks.”

You turned in his arms to face him, brushing your nose against his. “And you’ll still spoil me endlessly, even if we’re just going from the kitchen to the couch?”

“Of course,” he said softly. “I don’t need a city or shops to spoil you. I’d spoil you with sleepy hugs, bad jokes, foot rubs, and compliments until you beg me to stop.”

“I’d never beg you to stop,” you said, heart fluttering.

He leaned in and kissed you slow, like you were made of porcelain and starlight.

—

The movie was long finished. The snacks had dwindled to a few stray popcorn kernels. Your matching socks were half-off, twisted under the blankets. Riccardo’s hand was resting against your stomach, his breath warm and steady against the back of your neck.

“I love you,” he whispered sleepily. “More than anything.”

You reached down, intertwining your fingers with his. “I know. I feel it every second.”

He gave your hand the gentlest squeeze. “All yours, always.”

You closed your eyes, smile still on your lips, and drifted off in the safety of his arms— dreaming of London streets, fluffy clouds, and a boy who made love feel easy.

—

So much written for Cala atm😭🤣 I fr sense his aura & now understand why everyone loves him so much. Even finding images of him makes me wonder how can a man be sculpted so perfectly🤩

Hope everyone has a lovely rest of the weekend! x

[lordofmelancholy]

Timebomb HC: Songbirds

Timebomb HC after hearing Reed sing on my spotify that Ekko and Jinx often sing to each other but their very weird about it. Instead of serenading each other to songs you would think couples would sing normally, they sing shit like this too each other.

Bonus points if their really fuckin great at it and love doing it in alleyways cause they know it spooks the shit out of people when it echo's off the walls. It was normally Jinx's idea to do that specifically, but Ekko likes the fun so its easy to convince him to join right on in

Nah cause like honestly, hearing these two sing/harmonize off of each other when their in "spooky mode" much be the most haunting thing to hear in Zaun. It's just the pair echoing off of each other on top some high structure STREETS away from one another

Like they just *hear* each other and even if it's in the beginning when they on opposing forces with each other due to Silco and shit, it's near muscle memory how easy it is to slip into song with one another. But then Jinx tries to sing it after the bridge fight scene hoping that "boy savior" survived because he can survive anything, its been like that since they were kids. She starts off her part of the song and waits for him to pick up his part and waits. . .and waits. . .and waits. . .

But she doesn't think anything is wrong, not in the beginning at least. The bridge fight was huge, big noise, maybe he went underground (so to speak). So she waits; a day becomes two, two becomes three, and soon three becomes a week and still nothing.

Fun fact about certain bird species. Those who mate for life will often always carry a song specific for their mate that they will repeat for the rest of their lives especially renewing breeding. Penguins use it to find their mates in colonies and certain song birds repeat it every season. When their mate dies, some will actually keep on singing hoping their mate will return, sorta like the Last Male Kauai 'Ö'Ö, whose melody he kept on singing for a female who would never come because of course, he was the last of his species.

Just like Jinx and Ekko were the last of the original group up right up until Vi came back. After the bridge fight, Vi leaves with Cait and Ekko seemingly disappears, and all Jinx just keeps doing is keep on singing for day's. She haunts the streets of Zaun but no matter how much or how long she sings, she get's no response. That poor little songbird simply seems to be singing for a mate who may never come back for she now may very well be the last. . .

But oh oh! Do not worry nor fret. For she will not forever be the last. For when at her lowest and at her most dire, that missing part of her song shall return. And though she may not sing the first time around, too heart broken and bleak, that missing part will always serenade her. For picture Ekko, if you will, taking Jinx back to the firelight hideout. The tree still stands strong. It's still a home, but also now it's the greatest perch for a proud man to sing his song. Only now the song sounds different. Doesn't sound as sad like it use to. Or bleak. Instead it sounds happy as if he has finally learned something that has changed it's meaning. So he sings it proudly too her from atop the tree branches, when he see's her all by her lonesome. Because he remembers how happy they both were even before when they sung together, even though it was at a point where they both simply sung to give meaning to the mess their lives had become. Instead now, he sings solely for her. And he loves when she turns and listens and for a moment, she might even give him a smile for the last songbird isn't alone anymore. .