#Pat rambles into the void

[chiss-ticism]

Vampires doing mundane shit is the spice of life. I need to see Caine making a withdrawal at the bank

[clowningclownn]

i was thinking about something one of my ex's dad said about me while i was 15

he had pointed at an unhappy, obese gamestop employee and said that would be me one day. he had been saying it to make fun of me because i was "fat" (i was 5'7" and 170 pounds) and he hated the fact that i was dating his son

ive lost some weight and become more active as ive gotten older. i became really depressed for a few years bc of circumstances, but honestly? im nore happy now than ive ever been in my whole life

i decided to look up my ex, since its been so many years and... let's just say his dad predicted the wrong person's future lol

(this is incredibly petty btw bc his dad harassed me so much)

[ace-fandom-dumbass]

Found some songs I remember from girl scouts on spotify

Congrats Princess Pat on coming out as using she/they pronouns

[gh0stsp1d3r]

Saw you took D&W- Gambit requests. 💜

Would you consider a mostly fluffy one where Reader was in the Void, caught feelings for Remy, & somehow got separated from him in the transfer to Wade's timeline, so they reunite after each thinking the other didn't make it? Like maybe Reader never outright said how they felt till after they thought they'd lost Gambit? Something like that.

🏆 Thank you! 🏆

separated

A/n: love this more than you know anon

Warnings: did a lotttt of canon switching for this one. So… yeah. Fem!reader, mentions of wounds and blood

REMY MASTERLIST | KOFI

“Oh, look at them. They’re so adorable together.” Wade pointed to the both of you with a smile on his face, Logan furrowing his eyebrows.

“They just met.”

“Have you ever seen any disney movie ever? Love at first sight? I’m just glad my girl is finally getting some. About time. After that one breakup…” he rambled on.

Logan didn’t reply, just rolled his eyes and tuned him out, eyes glancing back up at the both of you.

The crackling of the fire filled the air as you sat next to him, feeling the warmth radiating from the flames and his leg touching yours. In that moment, the worries you had about Cassandra Nova and the desolate wasteland around you faded away.

He sent you a small smile, eyes lingering on your lips for a little too long when you laughed. It’s only been a few days, and he swears he’s known you his entire life.

He’s never felt this way before, the feeling foreign to him. It makes his heart pound and his soul yearn.

And everyone can notice it except for you, how hopelessly in love he is with you, and you him.

During the battle, he’s sending you a smirk, both of you working together to kill them all.

You stand by his side until you’re suddenly pulled by Wade into the portal, Remy holding a hand out, as if to try and stop him from pulling you in.

Wade assured you that he was probably okay, but let it slip that maybe, just maybe he was dead. He immediately covered his mouth.

You stared at Wade, the thought not crossing your mind in your shattered state.

The belief that he was dead, the simple idea of it, had you sulking in your bed, grieving for weeks. Wade had come into the room throughout the time, giving you food, telling you stories, speaking about whatever he could to hopefully crack a smile.

“Nice talk.” He murmured out, patting your arm while he stood up, sighing and shaking his head to himself.

“No luck?” Logan asked him when he walked out, switching through the channels on the tv.

“No luck. Still depressed as ever.”

Logan thought for a moment, pausing on one of the news channels.

“Why don’t you just do the portal… finger thing. Go back to the void.” He shrugged, “see if he’s alive or something.”

“Portal finger thing… haven’t heard that one before.” He said suggestively, Logan rolling his eyes at the man.

“You’re disgusting.” He murmured, standing up from the couch and into the kitchen.

But the more Wade thought about it, the better the idea sounded.

That’s how he ended up dragging the bloodied, heavy, and tired cajun into his apartment.

“Okay, there we go.” Wade grunted out, carrying him to the table.

You strolled out, not paying attention when you walked out your room. Wade smiled, standing next to the man. You didn’t see either of them, still staring down at your phone as you walked past them and into the kitchen.

You didn’t know he was there until he let out a pained little murmur of “cher?”

You spun around at the sound of his voice, your phone dropping and your eyes widening in surprise. Wade still stood next to him, proud smile on his face.

“Sooo… happy birthday.”

You were speechless, only stuttering out a very quiet “Remy?”

“And me.” Wade chimed in.

Logan also came walking out, his eyebrow quirking at the sight of him bleeding onto the table.

“He’s- he’s bleeding!” You told Wade.

“Yeah, had to carry him in. He’s extremely heavy too. I’m convinced he is all muscle.” He spoke, you rushing to his side.

“Ah, it’s jus’ a scratch, don’t worry ‘bout me, cher.” He told you with a wave of his hand, small smirk on his face.

You shook your head at him, going into the kitchen and grabbing the first aid kit stashed in there.

“Why are you hiding first aid kits in my house?” Wade asked you with a quirked eyebrow.

“In case I needed them.” You shrugged it off, pulling out some of the things that you needed. You grabbed a rag, Wade groaning at how much of his kitchen supplies would be ruined after this.

You ignored him, focusing on the man who laid out in front of you. His injuries weren’t bad enough to be fatal, thankfully, but they still could probably very easily get infected.

He stared up at you while you cleaned off his wounds. You glanced down at him, offering him a small smile.

“Can you take off your… suit.. thingie?”

He raised his eyebrows at your words. “Ah, if you wanted me to take my clothes off, you coulda said t’at.” He said with a laugh, sitting up to pull off his jacket and his body armor.

You rolled your eyes at the man, lightly shoving him back down when it was done.

“You know, you worried the shit out of me, Remy.” You told him quietly, beginning to clean the wounds that were littered across his body.

“I’m sorry, cher. I didn’t mean to do dat to ya.” He spoke sincerely. “But, if ‘t makes you feel better, I worried ‘bout you more.”

You sighed, damn him and his charm, you thought to yourself.

After you had finished cleaning his wounds, he sat up on the table, looking at you walk around the kitchen for a moment before turning to him, offering him a cup of water, which he gladly took.

“Reunions are always my favorites.” Wade spoke dreamily, his elbows propped up on the table next to Remy, staring at the both of you with a smile.

You furrowed your eyebrows at the man.

“Except for family reunions.” He shuddered at the mere thought. “Disgusting. But… this is too cute. And I think we should all-“ he trailed off, still rambling on as he went into the kitchen, opening up the freezer.

“You wanna go up to the roof?” You whispered to him, to which he quickly nodded at in reply, hopping off the table and grabbing a random sweater strewn around while you both left.

“God, I’m just so excited that- and they’re gone. What the hell? Where’d they go?” Wade asked himself, a tub of ice cream in his hands. He sighed before his eyes landed on Logan, who had walked out at the worst moment possible.

“Peanut! You’re here!”

“What?” He grumbled out.

“Since y/n and her hot boy toy left, we are gonna have a movie night.” Wade practically dragged him out, ignoring his protests.

You giggled as you practically dragged him up the stairs, pushing past the doors and leading him to the edge of one of the buildings.

You both sat next to each other, legs dangling off the edge. He looked at you, soft smile stuck on his face.

“What?” You asked him, noticing his staring. He shook his head, looking ahead again. Both of you stayed looking at the stars for a moment, the sound of passing cars and chirping crickets filling the air.

“I… I thought that you were dead.” You told him finally, still staring ahead.

“I’m here now, ain’t I?” He turned to you now, his head slightly tilted.

“Yeah, yeah,” you laughed, “obviously. But…” you trailed off.

“Hey,” he nudged your shoulder with his own, making you look at him. “T’ey gonna need a lot more than dat to take me out.”

You chuckled again, him cracking a smile at the sound of your laughter.

You both stared at each other, gazing into each others eyes for what felt like an eternity. He was the one to make the first move, his hand gliding off of the cold cement underneath him, and moving towards your face, sending shivers down your spine. Your breath hitched when he leaned closer, his lips ghosting over yours.

You were the one to smash your lips against his, shutting your eyes. Your lips moved against each other, finally getting the one thing you’ve been longing for.

You pulled away after a few moments, both of you softly panting, his hand still on your face, your lips still close to each other. “Is now a good time to tell you that I like you?” You asked him, him chuckling, pulling his hand away from your jaw.

“Remy likes you too, cher.” He told you. You sighed in relief, him turning to look back out at the stars. He pulled you closer to his side, and you put your head on his shoulder.

A/n: fuck yeah dude, this is what I call a comeback after not having written in forever

[adoregojo]

mikage's 5 steps guide! - nagi.s

i missed writing for nagi... my loverboy.. also this writing style is so fun??? wth??? i need to write like this again. i can barely keep one eye open so if there's any typo, ignore pls pls.

warnings: some cussing ig?

nagi was never that charming.

'charming' couldn't even stand being a word in his dictionary to be honest, nagi truly had zero sense of romance within him. he was an actual brick-walled person when it came to these things, or anything of strong-emotions in particular, there was no thoughts behind those void eyes of his but a circle of: sleep, eat, go to work, eat again, play games, sleep, and repeat.

even back to his high school years, not once he recalls talking to a girl, let alone getting a girlfriend, that was something beyond out of his character. maybe there was a girl that confessed to him, he remembered on valentines day he got a letter saying that he should go to the school's roof. and he ended up leaving the poor girl hanging on the air till the sky was clean orange because he genuinely 'forgot', nagi then earned the title 'heartbreaker' for a year straight, he let it be since it was much of a hassle to keep on correcting them. not like his reputation was any better before.

so you could say that nagi wasn't that much of a company to have around, on the other hand was his friend, reo who was basically the opposite of nagi, if anything he was prince charming himself. those social skills were enough to befriend anyone on sight, he got the looks, money and attention was surrounding him 24/7.

and even if reo gather the earth power to try and motivate nagi would go down hill, every time he tried setting him on a date it's either gonna end up horrible or nagi using the excuse to go to the bathroom and vanish to the nowhere. what an asshole.

at some point, reo accept the fact that maybe he's friend will in fact die alone.

and things switched around when you came to the picture.

first it wasn't that hard to notice you, your desk was glued to him after all. it was weird when you would greet him every morning and wish him a good night when you left, no one ever did that to him before, he tends to ignore and ends up being ignored. it was nice, a little reminder that somone was seeing him, acknowledging him.

slowly, the walls between you two was falling apart with each introduction. when you would pat him from his little naps for lunch time, or when it was leaving time, then he would stare at your back until your figure disappeared with a last wave, staring at the door for a little too long, perhaps wishing for you to walk back in.. who said that?

it was getting worse, or better, not the best at analysing his feelings. but nagi found himself looking out for a glimpse of you around the office, he has no shame to admit that the world suddenly felt gloomy without your presence beside him.

maybe he raised his head a little too fast when you walked in, maybe not. but he mostly did.

then you would ramble about how your shitty neighbour refused to clean after his pets filth and you two had a screaming match for a while before realising you were late. the was the worst way to start a monday morning, so you closed your eyes shut, rubbed your forehead for a peace of mind. then you opened your eyes, a piece of your favourite snaked would magically appear on your table.

for some reason your eyes traveled to the white painted head, he was looking at the other side, avoiding your questionable gaze hoovering over him.

Mondays aren't so bad after all, you thought.

perhaps he did place it there, who knows. —but nagi just really didn't like seeing you glum.

possibly, did he grew fond of you? he doesn't know. all he knew that lunch box you handed him the next day is a blessed gift within his palms. too good for him, you were too good for him.

you were the prove that the sky itself favoured him above anyone.

and when nagi wanted to ask you out, he only had one person to guide him to your heart.

so the very mysterious person behind the scene (reo) had a astounding idea that if someone like nagi; mister, game-addiction-freak. that on every step he'll get points! 100-90 if he did well, 80-70 not bad, 60-40 could've been worse.. 40-20 definitely could've been better... 20-0 yikes....

so with that, nagi was sent on a personal mission to win you over and soothe you with his nonexistent charm.

STEP ONE: be straightforward! it's not good to keep on dancing on someone's mindset with hints, it may cause a lot of confusion feelings and misunderstandings! only ask under a certain circumstances, a suitable place where were you two sit alone so they could have they're attention on you only. SIDE NOTE: try to make a good welcoming conversation to ease up the tension first then ask!

so nagi did just that, maybe a little too well.

he couldn't even eat his own lunch and just kept on rubbing his sweaty hands against each other's, staring back forth —he just noticed how many unfamiliar faces were there? did he really only seeyou?一 he was extra quiet which made you ask him multiple times if he was okay, he would just hum in response. what a smooth talker.

"nagi, you haven't even touched your food. are you actually okay?" you questioned, concerned. after taking a brief sip of your juice, but nagi just shook his head in conform, you raised a brow, a little in disbelief that he would think an obvious lie would go through you just like that. there was something off. the tension upon you two was twisting.

the words were on the tip of his tongue, yet they felt un-removed. all this stressing over four words were a pain, and a heavy burden he needed to reales before he lose his breathing track.

and the moment you took a bite and chewing on it, he just had to drop the bomb carelessly.

"go out with me."

so nagi didn't try and sooth the air, nor start a decent conversation. and when he gathered the earth courage to speak up, it wasn't even a question, that was a whole ass demand.

although, it worked. but it definitely could've gone better than you choking on your own food that you swore you witnessed death himself laughing his ass off at you.

what a great timing.

after you saw the heavens gates open for you and life flashing through your eyes, weirdly enough, you accepted.

huh, maybe he didn't mess up everything like he thought (he in fact did).

20 points!

STEP TWO: dress nice and compliment their outfit! dressing well means that you take the date seriously, complimenting them to foster a better sense of comfort and confidence, and they'll compliment you back! extra points if you made them all blushy and giddy!

nagi really wasn't the best at this.

instead of dressing 'nicely', all he wore was a big white hoodie and pants. didn't put much effort to his hair and just went off. it wasn't his problem that picking an estimated outfit was such a hassle. it's good at least it is something that covers him, right?

it all went downhill when you showed up, listen. he always thought you looked fit and nice in your suit work, and now he definitely wasn't ready to see you in regular, uniform out of work place. you just looked... so good, even great, stunning and beautiful, you name it.

nagi barely breath out a greeting, his eyes too busy scanning you from head to toe over and over, he couldn't take his gaze out of your sight even when you were on your way to the table. and he almost stumbled over twice for that, the first was nearly his face planting on the floor, and the second time he almost knocked out a whole plate of drinks. you just somehow managed to muddle over half of senses with your looks alone, maybe he should've considered writing his last letter.

"nagi.. you're staring too much."

the of yours dragged him out of his thoughts line. he saw as you held a sheepish— extra points?—expression, it was either from his heart-eyes eating you alive, or the date itself was bringing you to the nervous state, or both?

nagi cleared his throat, slightly cringing at himself for staring a little too hard. he was absolutely not doing reo's steps justice.

"sorry. you just, look really pretty." if not the prettiest of all, but again, nagi has eyes for you only to pay a mind to others around him.

your breath halts at that, you don't know what to say for a second, nagi himself was complementing you? and the fact that he said as it was a matter of a fact was such an out character thing. but at the same time a an amiable change. and it was for you only.

"thank you, I appreciate that." you say as you kept on twirling your fingers over your hair, you felt like a lovesick teenager. "I think you look very nice as well." you add, almost like a whisper, he still managed to catch it.

nagi let out a scoff, not even a smile forming on his features for that. "it's just hoodie, really."

"i still like it, it's very like you. I'm happy seeing that you can be yourself around me."

he flinch a bit at that, he really wasn't ready for this- it takes a strong-soulful soldier to handle this. and he really, really wanted to be gods strongest warrior just for you. so he gets a grip on himself and mumble a thanks.

you smile sweetly at that, and nagi may really be not the strongest soldier under your spell.

50 points!

STEP THREE: make a conversation! show interest in their personal life and listen to every ramble they have, try to also throw side comments there and here to support them and blow away any negative feelings of the talk being one-sided. also try and talk about your own life to make it easier for them to talk all night. SIDE NOTE: try and joke around to bloom a friendly tune. extra points if you made them laugh!

third time's a charm, right?

however, since nagi was uncommonly unfond of others babbling. in fact he found it annoying and it was hard keeping his eyes evenly open. but then when it comes to you, he found your feathery tune to be airy, he grew ease to it pitch.

so he handed over all his senses of hearing to you on one knee, and let you speak freely. switching between different topics form nowhere, and like the world- his world- itself was turning for you only, his eyes and soul was for you to talk and he'll rot into a shallow void to your lovely enunciate to play on a broken radio repeating.

maybe he should tell you to stop, because your non-touched food was getting cold, and maybe he should tell that to himself that too because he didn't even realize his plate was even there.

it felt like he had drifted from the original plan, instead the tables were turned and he was the one being swoon by you..

not that he minded honestly. but ending the night with you being the one who filled the space was enough to create a makeshift reo berating him, nevertheless, nagi really, really wanted you to like him back. to consider the idea of another date with him.

plus, he also liked your laugh, he really did. didn't the guide say something about making you laugh? even tried telling a joke that you actually chuckled at, something that was unneeded to say that his book was empty, he had to search on google "funny jokes" for gods sakes, how hopeless can he possibly get?

"why couldn't the sunflower ride it bike?" nagi utter flatly, "why" you slope your head to the side. "because it lost it petals." the joke was old, dusty, forsaken. and the urge to recoil the second it left his mouth was understandable. but somehow you still pushed out a laugh at it, you don't know if it was an amusingly one, or because that nonchalant face was clearly begging you to laugh. with that monochromatic tone and all made it even funnier.

that bloomed the smallest amount of exhilaration within his rib cage. it was lovely, and what was made the giddiness to flourish inside his belly was the fact that he was the reason for it. it felt priceless. a sight to a crave in his midst. completely bizarrely about all of this, nagi let's you take over him. to consume him, his heart, his breath and soul were yours to claim.

at least he did something good that night?

70 points!

STEP FOUR: walk them back home! it's quite a simple act but very affected and gentlemanly, make sure to make them feel save and guarded! hidden notes: try to hold their hand!

after paying the price, you and nagi take your leave. with also nagi's off attitude with him opening the doors for you and let you walk first. although, who were to complain about such a treatment? you'll take it

but weirdly enough, nagi was a bit on the edge. like he had a n amount of ants in his pants, couldn't look at your direction, barely spoke out a response, or anything in general. and 一was he holding his breath???一

wait, was nagi actually.... nervous?

you glanced at him, shoulders stiffened, hands moving too much and fast, mouth was dry and agape, half dizzy 一when he isn't?一

now that you did not expect.

it was even ten times worse than him in the cafeteria earlier, it felt like nagi was about to confess to you his cruelest crime. the tenseness was mixed with the deep-seated tenderness, nevertheless, it was a bittersweet taste. and it kept on going until you two stood together by your home.

"i had fun tonight, nagi." you spoke first.

he finally flinched out of his own world, he sees you rubbing your arm, the gesture was sketchy, almost as if you were waiting for him to say something, anything.

but nagi's mind was blank, blow out an air in his ear and it will run out of the other, empty head. yet his mind was roaming, that need to say something clung up to him again. too many thoughts he cannot process.

but all nagi did know was he wanted you to stay a little longer.

"that's.. good?" he should have stayed quiet, what kind of answer is that.

you nodded awkwardly in agreement, breathing out an 'yeah..' he felt a bit guilty at making you feel uncomfortable, the fact of him being unfaithful may have crossed your mind, and nagi didn't like it. but you always managed to make feel weird, he always felt too warm when you would get close to him, words were lost when he would look at your eyes, and now this..

but despite everything, he felt like himself when he was with you the most..

every game had it secret move, and his was that he need to let himself be.

"can we do this again? i also had a good night." a part of nagi wanted to add that it was one of the best nights he ever had, yet it was too cheesy, cringe.

"yes!" you replied, too fast. you sounded so desperate! you palmed your mouth, embarrassment remains on your face as you cleared your throat. "i mean.. yes, we can do this again."

nagi had to physically bent down his head, he was gonna set you on fire alive with his eyes, if he may say, you looked cute when flustered. and his heart wouldn't stop beating so infuriated, almost bursting out raw of chest.

nagi for some reason, stretched out his arms. it was bold and he knew it, he just did it and hoped for you to handle it. "um.. can i?" he sees you halting at your place. eyes ogling around but his own.

you walk up all jittery to him until there's barely any inches left between the two of you, you kept your eyes glued to your feet as if it was the most interesting thing in this moment, but it's also like you were asking him if it was okay, unsureness. so he pushes your head gently forward to rest on his stiffen chest. an arm runs around your back to force you as close as possible to him.

you shrivel when nagi's nose would be buried deep unto your hair locks. your scent would draw him at slacken, his whole body bending against yours that you felt like he wanted to crawl under your skin desperately, searching for the seeds of endless love you endowed to him.

you didn't know if you were somehow intoxicated, but you swore that you felt a pair of soft lips pressing against your skull, god, you felt like melting and soon to become a paste sliding down between his fingers. you gently pushed yourself back, and perhaps you imagined nagi's whining for you to not let go. it's like you were gonna fly away once he unwrapped you free. the second you meet his face, a pout expression on his lips, and you couldn't help yourself from cupping his cheeks, squeezing them slightly. a smile made it way to your face as his eyebrows grew frowned.

nagi's hands were on yours, pulling them down from his face, but not too far. unabashedly keeping his eyes locked with yours, he was holding you tight and close, basically hostage. the bug-stomach is back at again but more fiercely than ever.

80 points!

FINAL STEP: kiss.

the dull hue travels down on your lips. boldly, he doesn't look away for what felt like eternity, if anything it seems like they grew heavy the second you parted them slightly to say something that sticked on your tongue.

"can i kiss you?"

was he trying to kill you?

you don't respond, instead you made a move to give him a quick peck on his cheek. backing off faster than ever. nagi stood still, rooting in his place, completely bamboozled. his mind stopped working and his eyes were drifting off in different directions.一is it normal that he felt like melting to the ground?一

"im so sorry, nagi- i just got really nervous and-"

"seishiro."

"eh?"

"seishiro, call me seishiro." he finally found a piece of mind to say. he didn't know if it came out as a command, but he sincerely wanted you to call him by his name. he'd die a happy man then.

"well.. goodnight, seishiro. can't wait for our next date," you said, weaving before your door. nagi barely being able to wave back, his mind was still half empty. you just made him see the light of the stars and left with with the sweetest, loveliest smile for him to think about for the next couple of weeks.

maybe he stood there for a little longer than he should have, his face was on fire, his heart on race track. antithesis of the nonchalant face he had, he made a move to rub the spot you pressed your soft lips against. and the first thing that came to his mind that it was definitely worth it.

and by now, he absolutely forgot about the points and the game itself. oh well, at least half of it worked. he just did it in his own version, which apparently was charming to you. nagi thinks if being charm to you, than he can come over anything.

limitless points! you have made your own path to the heart!

[honorarysimp]

Chapter 7: Master of Disguise

series masterlist

Is anything real?

Time had slipped away from you once again, leaving you feeling hollow and detached.

A deep-seated emptiness fills you, a numbness that settled into your very core. The weight of the betrayal still looms heavily, a constant reminder of what you’ve been denied.

Freedom. Peace. Happy ever after.

Lorraine.

Each passing moment only deepens the wound, a raw and festering ache that refuses to heal.

The guilt fueled by your own complicity in the situation, gnaws at you, a constant companion on your arduous journey.

This pain, this void, was the inescapable reality that had become your own personal hell.

A once-proud tree that stood tall and strong is now stripped bare, its branches now stark and barren against the sky. Its trunk, now resembling a weathered, curved finger jutting from the ground, served as both support and torment.

You found yourself tethered to its base, arms bound tightly with thick rope just above your head, the coarse fibers chaffing against your skin.

There’s blood everywhere. Your hand stings from the cut, your head stopped bleeding a while ago but the subtle ache still lingers. Not to mention the fact you practically reek of it.

Maxine's voice reaches your ears, piercing through the haze that clouds your mind. Her pretentious and grandiose tone grates at your nerves, but you tune out most of her rambling, too numb to care.

Not even the split in your head is a concern, external wounds pale in comparison to the internal wounds you’re still processing.

Snippets of her flowery language about the ‘ritual’ and how you are the necessary part of it flicker in and out of your consciousness.

Maxine's words somewhat resonate through your weary mind, a dark symphony that echoes with an eerie familiarity.

She speaks of the unholy alliance, the origins of a dark gift — a manifestation of black magic, inherited through the generations. A unique bloodline, bound by a formidable connection to the very essence that birthed the occult and its forbidden arts they practice.

Your bloodline, apparently.

Maxine's voice rings in your ears once more, her tone eerie and ominous as she lays bare the hidden portion of the prophecy.

She delves deep into the dark pact that was forged long ago — it was a bargain between an ancestor and a demon, a deal that granted access to supernatural power in exchange for a sinister promise to inevitably inhabit a descendant of the bloodline.

The last thing you’d asked was why they waited so long to act, Maxine’s reply of “we had to wait for your connection to the land to be remade, you’d been gone a while Rooks, all we had to do was wait” served no means of easing you.

With each word, a chill runs down your spine, the culmination of generations passed untouched within this cursed bloodline.

Figures, it would lead all the way to you.

Maxine's hand connects with your cheek, two firm pats resonating with a jarring impact that forces your weary attention back to her.

The veil of detachment momentarily lifts as you focus on her face, dazed confusion and unease taking over you.

Maxine's voice cuts through the fog of your thoughts, her tone sharp and unyielding as she urges you to pay attention.

"Stay with me, Rooks," she commands, a hint of impatience lacing her words, “this is the most important part. Focus, don't let your mind wander”.

Your eyes dart back and forth as you observe the scene unfolding around you. Your gaze falls on the three male figures, moving with zombie-like grace, engaged in tasks unknown to you.

At this point, you’re not sure if they actually are alive or not.

Bobby-Lynn and Lorraine stand by the altar a few feet away, their actions concealed by the mysterious preparations that are underway. Anxiety builds within you, fueled by the sense of impending events that are beyond your control.

Lorraine hasn’t looked you in the eye since she walked away a few minutes ago to go help Bobby-Lynn, you hate yourself for being hurt over it.

You hate her. No — you should hate her, but you don’t, and that makes you hate yourself.

Maxine turns back to you, her expression solemn and reverent as she speaks. "You should consider yourself lucky, Rooks," she murmurs, a hint of awe in her voice.

"It is an honor to be a part of this, to bare witness the arrival of the power that has bestowed its gifts upon us. To see it here, in the mortal world, is a long awaited moment”.

You muster the strength to respond, defiance flaring in your eyes. "You're delusional, Maxine," you retort, your voice thick with defiance, “this isn't an honor, it's a goddamn death sentence."

Maxine grins wickedly, her fingers tracing along your jawline with a slow, deliberate touch. "Bless you heart, Rooks," she whispers maliciously.

"You have the honor of becomin’ an instrument of chaos and destruction, set to unleash the fullmight of the darkness upon the world” her words carry a sinister undertone, fueling a chill that runs down your spine.

You jerk your head away from her touch, your defiance flaring as you wrench at the ropes binding your wrists, your breath coming out in rapid bursts.

"You don't actually know a thing about what you're messin’ with," you hiss, voice filled with a mixture of anger and desperation, “you have no fucking idea what you're gonna unleash!"

Maxine's expression turns cold, a chilling resolve etched into her features as she retreats, taking a cautious step back. "It matters not," she declares mockingly, her voice filled with unwavering conviction.

"For if the demon is not capable of inhabitin’ the promised descendant, it means all of our fellow practitioners — myself included — relinquish our occult powers, abilities, and magical gifts” she pauses, tapping her index finger against her pursed lips, “and… well, I just can’t have that, not if I’m gonna be a star one day”.

Your eyes widen in disbelief as you stare at Maxine, a mix of astonishment and frustration evident on your face. "Are you even hearin’ yourself right now?!" you exclaim, your voice filled with incredulity.

"We’re talkin’ the possibility of the end of the world here, all for a few magic tricks and your name in shinin’ lights?! Do you have any idea what you're sayin’?!" The gravity of the situation hits you hard, fueling your desperation to make her see reason.

Her expression hardens, as if your words have struck a nerve. "Maybe you should be worryin’ about your own purpose," she retorts, her tone tinged with a hint of accusation.

"All those people you give a damn about — every single person on this planet — everythin’ they love,” Maxine leans in close, lips parted as the tip of her tongue absently traces the sharp tips of her top teeth, “everythin’ they've ever held dear will burn. And you'll be the one to cause it”.

Guilt and doubt gnaw at your heart as Maxine's words sink in, evoking a wave of conflicted emotions within you.

No. It’s not your fault. You didn’t ask to be born, you didn’t ask for this, you didn’t even know about this.

You pull furiously at the restraints that confine you, your movements desperate and determined.

"No" you protest, the word escaping your lips in a choked whisper, “no, no, no! You can't do this!"

Your heart races, anguish coursing through your veins. The weight of the situation bears down on you, but you refuse to accept the fate that Maxine has laid out.

You glance up at the feeling of something warm dropping down your arm, realizing that the coarse fibres of the rope have seared into your skin, the sharp pain finally registering amidst the turmoil.

A grimace crosses your face as you observe the crimson streaks staining your arms, forming a stark contrast against your skin. You hear a caw somewhere nearby, but it’s faint, pulling your attention instantly regardless.

You want to call out for their help, but you’re not sure what they could do for you.

Maxine's voice pierces through the air, "such a waste, really," she murmurs, her voice tinged with both regret and condescension. Your gaze snaps back to her, meeting her vixen stare as she appraises you with a subtle tilt of her head.

"Such a pretty face," she continues, her tone dripping with a sinister allure “it's a damn shame that it won't be yours for much longer."

The weight of her words sink in, a chilling reminder of the fate that awaits you.

Lorraine's sudden voice breaks the tense moment, firm and steadfast as she approaches. "Everythin’ is ready," she announces, her words carrying a sense of complicity "Bobby-Lynn said to bring this to you."

Maxine breaks her gaze from you, acknowledging Lorraine's message with a nod. The interruption provides a brief reprieve from the intensity of the situation, allowing a temporary respite.

You strain to hear the hushed exchange behind Maxine, picking up on Lorraine's words filled with grim resolve.

"You know what to do?" she asks, a hint of authority in her tone.

At first she says nothing, but when Lorraine's response does comes it’s soft, a quiet yet confident "yes" escaping her lips.

Maxine's words cut through the tension, commanding yet tinged with a hint of disdain as she directs Lorraine.

"Do it, then," she instructs, her voice laced with determination, “I'll go make sure bimbo didn't screw nothin’ up. We only got one shot at this”.

With that Maxine saunters off, leaving you and Lorraine together, you take note of the ritual bowl cradled in her hands.

As you stand bound to the tree, the silence lingers between you and Lorraine. Your skin tingles in places where the blood has dried, a subtle itch reminding you of the toll the situation has taken.

Lorraine remains silent, her expression inscrutable, leaving you uncertain about her next move.

In the stillness, you observe Lorraine raising the ritual bowl as she begins to step forward. She pauses momentarily, her gaze finally meeting yours, instantly a silent communication passing between you.

Hate her. Hate her. She betrayed you. Traitor.

Her voice trembles slightly as she murmurs quietly, "I'm sorry”, the two words shattering the facade you never had the strength to portray.

Not Lorraine. Never with Lorraine. Even now.

Time seems to slow as Lorraine dips her fingers into the bowl, the solemn preparation ceremony beginning.

You stand quietly before Lorraine, allowing her to approach you. You don't struggle as she cautiously reaches out, her fingers begin trace symbols on your face with a mixture of reverence and sorrow.

The sensation of her touch is oddly gentle, and the scent of your own blood mingled with the burning bonfire nearby hangs heavily in the air.

As Lorraine draws symbols on your face with your blood, you remain still, submitting to the ritual unfolding before you.

Her touch is precise, almost tender, as if marking you with the weight of what's about to transpire.

The sensation is peculiar, the coolness of the blood mixing with the warmth of her fingertips, creating a strange dichotomy of emotions within you.

Despite the betrayal and the turbulent emotions seething within you, you can't help but acknowledge the undeniable beauty radiating from Lorraine. It adds an extra layer of complexity to the mix, intertwining anger with admiration, revulsion with fascination.

It’s not fair, you don’t understand it, how your heart can break and stitch itself back together just from the simple fact her eyes are on you.

Lorraine breaks the silence, her voice softer now.

"You can ask me," she whispers gently, continuing with the ritualistic markings on your face. Her words hang in the air, an invitation to voice the questions that weigh heavily on your mind.

There's a solemnity to her tone, a hint of guilt laced through her words, recognizing the debt she owes you for what she's doing.

What she’s done.

Your voice finds its way out of your mouth, the words slipping out with a mix of anguish and confusion.

"Was any of it real?"

Lorraine pauses for a moment, the weight of the question sinking in. "The truth is," she begins, her voice laden with sorrow, "everythin’ I said was real. The connection, the bond we shared — it was real to me”.

There's a lingering pain in her eyes as she speaks, the memories of the time spent together still vivid in her mind. You narrow your eyes at Lorraine's evasive response, the realization dawning on you.

"And me?" you press on, your voice laced with a blend of pain and disbelief, “what about me, Lorraine?"

Lorraine's face contorts with guilt and discomfort as she hears your question, her movements faltering as she struggles to find the right words. The way she chews on her bottom lip serves as a telltale sign of her discomfort.

Finally, she manages to respond, her voice trembling, "you know I care for you”.

But the way she averts her gaze speaks volumes beyond her words, indicating the complexity and depth of her emotions towards you.

She’s still hiding something and you know it.

Your voice breaks as you plead for the truth, desperation seeping into your every word. "Tell me," you croak out, your voice cracking with raw emotion “don't let me die without knowin’."

Lorraine falters, her resolve wavering at your heartfelt request. It's a moment of vulnerability, where the weight of unspoken truths threatens to break the fragile facade she's been holding onto.

It’s almost as if the reality of your life being on the line wasn’t something she’d actually processed, she almost seems… incognitive.

Following Lorraine's glance over her shoulder, you notice her stealing a quick look to check on the other girls.

It's a telling gesture, a subtle yet desperate attempt to ensure that nobody is watching. The air grows thicker with anticipation as she turns back to you, her guard dropping a notch as she meets your gaze.

Lorraine's voice is low, a hushed admission filled with remorse. "Blood magic," she whispers, "it's binding. The only way for it to be broken is if the one who cast it breaks the oath they made upon making it”.

Her words hang in the air, a confession of guilt and a reminder of the inescapable nature of her actions.

Confusion floods your features as you struggle to comprehend the intricacies of the situation. "I don't... understand," you utter, your voice laced with a mixture of perplexity and frustration.

“Maxine cutting her hand and promising to let you go — was that blood magic?”

She has the decency to make an apologetic expression as she shakes her head and mutters “all for show to get you to do what she wants”.

You scoff, shaking your head “yeah that seems to be the only constant around here, can at least count on everyone to bend over fucking backwards for Maxine”.

Lorraine's expression crumples, a wave of guilt washing over her face. Her voice trembles as she speaks, carrying a hint of remorse and a touch of desperation.

"For what it's worth," she murmurs, "I had no idea it would come to this. I swear I didn't sign up for this. That—" her voice wavers, "—that's real."

There's a sincerity in her tone, a glimpse of the genuine care and concern she had for you, amidst the sea of deceit and betrayal.

Something is off about this, you see it in the slightest twitch between her brow, the worry lines that form under her eyes and at the corners of her mouth. And with the way she hesitates before proceeding again, it’s almost reluctant.

The silence envelops you both, only broken by the soft brush of Lorraine's fingertips grazing along your skin. The delicate sensation trails down your neck, a gentle, if not unnerving, reminder of the ritual in progress.

Amidst the solemnity, you break the silence with a poignant inquiry.

"That night when you showed up at my door," you begin, your voice steeped with a mix of vulnerability and skepticism, "was that real?"

Lorraine's expression softens, a hint of shame lacing her features as she contemplates your question.

Lorraine solemnly shakes her head, her gaze averted. "Me showing up," she confesses, her voice laden with sorrow, "that was Maxine's idea."

She pauses for a moment, gathering her words, then continues, "She knew what you’d discovered in the study, and she wanted me there to make sure you didn't leave”.

There's a mixture of guilt and resignation in her voice as she lays bare the orchestrated nature of that fateful night. You aren’t even surprised at this point.

Amidst the delicate strokes of Lorraine's fingers, you broach another question. "That cookout with your parents," you ask, a hint of skepticism in your voice, “was that real or just another part of the scheme?"

Lorraine hesitates for a moment, her painting faltering slightly before resuming.

Lorraine's candid admission fills the air, her voice laden with a touch of reluctance. "They wanted to do a ritual that night," she confesses, "a ceremony to reconnect you with the land quicker during the New Moon”.

The explanation trails off as if the weight of her words is too much to bear at times. She adds, her voice filled with a hint of bitterness, "I just made sure you ‘never’ showed up, so the ritual couldn't happen."

The revelation leaves you somewhat confused. If Lorraine is entwined in this sinister plan, then why has she seemingly been shielding you from harm?

The contrasting threads of her involvement and protective sliver over you weave together, creating a tangle of confusion within your head.

Amidst the ongoing ritual, Lorraine's hands momentarily falter, her expression mirroring a blend of guilt and tenderness.

"You," she utters quietly, a hint of regret mingling with her voice, "I need you to know you were always so much more than a means to an end, but… you became..."

Her words trail off, leaving unspoken emotions to hang in the air between you both. The weight of her unfulfilled confession, both in the present and the past, lingers heavily, tugging at the corners of your heart.

Amidst the quiet ritualistic preparations, a faint longing tugs at Lorraine's tone, a subtle testament to the deep connection blossoming between you both.

Her gaze momentarily averts, her thoughts seemingly overwhelmed by the undeniable truth of your entangled lives.

Within the weight of the revelations and the tension lingering in the air, a silent agreement seems to form, acknowledging the unspoken depth of emotions that binds you together—an admission of the intricate and convoluted journey that brought you to this moment.

Your thoughts are in turmoil, your words tumbling out in a jumbled rush as your emotions get the best of you.

"Fuck — it was real to me!" you exclaim, your voice tinged with a mixture of anguish and desperation, “you asked me if it was real!"

The raw emotion seeps through your words, mirroring the depth of your feelings as your eyes flicker between hers, searching for something — anything that would at least let you know truth.

"Was it not real to you?!"

The question hangs in the air, filled with the weight of your emotional turmoil and the longing for a reciprocal truth amidst the maze of secrets and deceit.

Maxine overhears your outburst, her attention drawn by the intensity of your voice. Alongside Bobby-Lynn, she witnesses the tumultuous exchange between you and Lorraine.

A flicker of disbelief dances in Maxine's eyes as realization dawns upon her. "I'll be damned," she murmurs, the words escaping her lips in a hushed tone.

"You did cave in after all”.

The implication behind Maxine's words is weighted with a mix of astonishment and a hint of satisfaction.

Maxine's presence looms closer, her eyes narrowing as she digs deeper with the pointed questions.

"When did this happen?" she inquires, her voice sharp as she uses the tip of her knife to gesture between you and Lorraine. The tension in the air intensifies as Maxine probes further, her words laden with accusation and curiosity.

Lorraine freezes at Maxine's question, her features hardening. She glances between Maxine and Bobby-Lynn, her gaze guarded.

As Lorraine's silence hangs heavy in the air, Maxine's grin widens as she stares her down knowingly “so you did it”, her expression dripping with malice “of course you did, you’re weak”.

She turns to look at you, her gaze lingering on your face before she reveals the truth. "Lorraine kissing you..." Her voice trails off for a moment, a malevolent gleam in her eyes.

"That was her breakin’ her oath, and it shattered the bindin’ spell between you”.

Your heart plummets, your gaze locking with Lorraine's, searching for an explanation. "What spell?" you wonder aloud, your voice trembling with a mix of disbelief and hurt, “a spell that bound us together?"

Your mind races back to the moment Lorraine's lips softly brushed against yours, a tender moment now burdened with the weight of secrecy and betrayal.

Her silence only confirms the allegations.

As the questions flood your mind, a single question escapes your lips— "since when?"

Lorraine's voice trembles as she recalls the memory, her guilt evident in her expression. "When you cut your hand on the headstone at the cemetery," she admits, her words heavy with remorse, "I wiped up your blood and patched you up”.

Lorraine pauses, the weight of her confession clearly weighing on her conscience. She glances away, unable to meet your gaze as she continues, her voice hushed.

"I used your blood to weave a spell, a spell to bind us together”.

As the puzzle pieces fall into place, the fog in your mind clears, and everything starts to make sense. The inexplicable moments when things didn't add up, where your actions didn't seem to align with your true self — it all becomes clear.

Understanding dawns upon you as you realize the depth of the spell’s influence. When you were around Lorraine, her presence seemed to be the only thing that mattered, everything else fading into obscurity.

Before the sting of betrayal can cut deeper into your bones, Maxine's voice oozes with misplaced pride as she lays a proud hand on Lorraine's shoulder.

"Don’t be too hard on her," she smirks, her voice dripping with condescension.

"It's not like she had a choice in the matter, we needed to take extra precautions in case you tried to bail again” she shoots you a smirk, “which is why when she confirmed to us you were seein’ the birds again, it was so easy to lead you here with one”.

Maxine pauses, her eyes narrowing as she adds, "she knows she’s on my leash, and I won’t hesitate to pull it if she ever even thinks about disobeying me” the way she roughly grabs Lorraine’s face to make her look to the redhead makes something snap inside you.

Your protective instincts flare up, your temper flaring in response to Maxine's cruel actions and words.

With a surge of defiance, you pull at your restraints without a second thought, the desperation in your voice undeniable.

"DON’T FUCKING TOUCH HER" you fiercely defend Lorraine, straining against the bonds holding you captive.

Maxine's laughter pierces the air, her tone laced with sardonic amusement. "My lord, look at the loose cannon," she sneers, her gaze flickering between you and Lorraine.

"You really did come after her on your own free will," she mocks, a cruel taunting in her voice, “suppose you were right, Lorraine. We wouldn’t have needed the spell after all."

Maxine releases her grasp on Lorraine, snatching the bowl brusquely from her hands, her grip forceful and unyielding. "Quit wastin’ time!" Maxine spits out, her voice sharp with irritation.

She thrusts the knife into Lorraine's hand, her eyes narrowing as she glares at her expectantly, gesturing towards you. "Finish preppin’!" Maxine's words carry a sinister edge, leaving no room for refusal or delay.

The tension in the room intensifies as the command hangs in the air, leaving Lorraine with no choice but to comply, her expression a mask of obedient resignation.

Lorraine walks up to you, her gaze locking onto you with those captivating doe eyes. Helpless with your wrists bound above your head to the tree, you are vulnerable to her every whim.

No. No. You refuse to believe that Lorraine would just abandon you like this, maybe in some way you deserve it for abandoning her. Hell maybe that’s why she joined them.

Or maybe, Lorraine is blinded, a small delusional part of you prays maybe she’s under the influence of witchcraft she’s unaware of.

You whisper fervently to Lorraine, your voice tremulous with desperation. "Raine," you plead, your heart pounding in your chest, "look at me — this is me, please." Your words carry the weight of undeniable emotion, an unspoken plea for her to acknowledge the depth of your feelings.

"We both know I’m not the only one who feels this," you continue whispering so it stays between you two, voice trembling with sincerity.

Lorraine comes to a halt just a few inches away from you, her proximity sending a surge of mixed emotions through you. Her free hand rests gently on your abdomen, stirring feelings within you that remain unspoken yet can’t be denied.

The knife held loosely in her other hand suddenly feels insignificant, almost insignificant as you find yourself captivated by her presence, the air thick with unspoken longing.

Lorraine's grip on your shirt tightens, and with a gentle yet assertive pull, she tugs at it, exposing more of your skin.

Her gaze lingers on the strip of newly exposed flesh before she whispers softly, "real," the word barely audible.

Without a second thought, she brings the knife up, slicing through the fabric easily, the sound of the sharp blade against the fabric causing a shiver to run down your spine. The cool touch of the metal brushing on your skin sends a jolt of electric anticipation through you, heightening the intimate moment between you and Lorraine.

If you aren’t careful, you might feel just a sliver of hopeful from that simple word that carries so much meaning.

Your heart races in your chest as Lorraine returns your gaze, her eyes holding a vulnerability that mirrors your own. She hands the knife back to Maxine, who grins with satisfaction as Lorraine takes back the ritual bowl.

Maxine shoots a warning glare at you and Lorraine, her voice dripping with a mix of mischief and authority. "Be quick about it," she warns, a subtle smirk curling at the corners of her lips, "no funny business, lovebirds."

Maxine strides away, leaving you and Lorraine once more locked in a silent yet intense stare-off, the air between you both thick with unspoken words.

Lorraine averts her gaze, a mix of vulnerability and determination etched on her face. She plunges her fingers into the bowl, withdrawing them covered in a thin sheen of crimson.

Her hand trembles slightly as she raises it to your chest, her touch gentle yet deliberate. With a steady hand, Lorraine begins to paint sigils along your chest, her fingers leaving dark, bloody traces on your skin.

Sudden realization strikes you with jarring clarity. Her quiet demeanor, her unwavering compliance, her apparent helplessness — it all makes sense now. The pieces of the puzzle click together in your mind.

It’s a pattern she’s been trapped within, conditioned to follow from an early age. The weight of her words — her steadfast determination to break free from the shackles of control — reverberates within you, echoing in the depths of your soul.

It’s something you understand, because you had to leave without a word to anyone just to escape your own hell. Lorraine never had that luxury.

Your heart aches with sympathy and compassion, a desire to protect her from the chains that bind her soul.

As you watch Lorraine working carefully to scribe the sigils on your chest, her fingers trembling slightly, there’s a deep-seated anguish in your heart.

You recognize the familiar dance of fear and obedience that has long dictated her existence. You discern a profound fear within her—a fear instilled by the consequences she’s endured as a result of defying her father’s authority.

It’s as if she’s imprisoned by her own mind, shackled by the weight of her past, her spirit yearning for liberation.

It suddenly hits you — the kiss, the way she had willingly broken her hold over you with a simple kiss. It didn’t align with her compliance.

Why would she free you if she were solely under Maxine’s control?

There’s a deeper conflict within her, a struggle between her conditioned obedience and the fierce, fiery spirit you’ve glimpsed beneath her calm facade.

She knew what they were planning, she knew you’d be free even after her fake kidnapping. She expected you to run for it. Maybe… that wasn’t a complete act after all.

Lost in the intensity of the moment, your focus shifts back to Lorraine as her fingers lightly trail along your skin. The contrast between the chill of the night air and the warmth of the nearby bonfire pales in comparison to the burning ache ignited within you.

Her touch, soft yet deliberate, sends a shiver down your spine, enveloping you in a web of longing and tenderness. In this stolen moment, nothing else matters except for her, her every touch fueling the fire within your soul.

Lorraine pauses her meticulous task, her eyes lifting to meet yours. The tension between you intensifies, her gaze locking onto yours with unwavering focus.

It doesn’t make what she’s done right, and it definitely doesn’t excuse anything, but you’ll be goddamn if you go down without making her wake the fuck up.

The world around you fades into obscurity, leaving only the two of you adrift in a sea of unspoken emotions.

As Lorraine holds your gaze, a mixture of vulnerability and a hidden yearning swirl within her eyes, reflecting the depth of her feelings. Time seems to stand still as the weight of decision hangs heavily in the air.

You muster every ounce of fervor, every bit of conviction, channeling it into your words as you address Lorraine.

With unwavering resolve and a desperate plea in your voice, you declare "you aren’t one of them, you never were."

Each syllable holds meaning, bearing the weight of your belief in her. Your words pierce through the veil of silence, aiming to ignite a flame of self-discovery within her.

At this point, you’re pulling out all the cards you have up your sleeve to get through to her.

As you lock eyes with Lorraine, you channel the memory of her words from weeks ago, echoing them back to her with a sense of determination.

"You wouldn’t let them get away with it, now would you?”

Your plea resounds, a desperate plea for her to find the strength within herself to defy the clutches of the black magic that clouds her judgement.

“You have to fight it, Raine,” you continue with unwavering conviction, your voice laced with a mixture of compassion and desperation “I know this isn’t you”.

“Fight it,” you implore her, your voice becoming a lifeline of connection between you both “you’re stronger than you think, you can break free from them. Trust in yourself, in your own power. It’s not too late”.

Your words carry the weight of your unwavering belief in Lorraine’s ability to overcome her circumstances. You hold onto the hope that somewhere within her, she still possesses the strength to resist the darkness that threatens to consume her.

Lorraine visibly struggles, her expression contorting with a mixture of pain and confusion. She blinks several times, as if trying to clear a fog from her mind, her hand trembling slightly as she presses it gently against your chest.

As she does so, smudges of red mar the delicate sigils on your skin. It’s evident that the conflict within her rages fiercely, with each passing moment.

"Look at me, Raine," you implore, your tone carrying a thread of vulnerability, attempting to catch her attention.

When her gaze meets yours once more, you speak with a mixture of compassion and determination in your voice, "listen to me. You are more than what they've all made you believe. They don’t own you. You're strong, capable, and you have the power to break free."

Your words, a soft yet firm reminder of her resilience and potential, carry a sense of unwavering support.

"They’re going to kill me, Raine," you implore, your voice cracking with raw anguish, “ I need you to wake up."

Your words hang in the air for a brief moment, a poignant pause filled with the weight of impending consequences.

Lorraine's gaze flutters between your eyes, her voice breaking as she whispers, "real?"

Her voice, filled with both hope and trepidation, hints at a glimmer of belief in your words. In this vulnerable moment, she's grasping onto the possibility that the truth you speak might just be her lifeline to liberation.

As the gravity of the moment settles upon you, a wave of raw emotion washes over you, leaving you momentarily speechless.

The weight of the situation bears down on your heart, pulling a confession from within you that you never anticipated making. With a deep breath, you moisten your lips, gathering your courage before speaking the three words that carry an ocean of meaning.

"I love you," you whisper, those three words filled with a vulnerability and sincerity that resonates deep within both of your souls.

Amidst the turmoil and uncertainty that surrounds you, one thing remains steadfast and clear — your love for Lorraine. It’s a love that you pray can defy all odds, one that may thrive even amidst the chaos and darkness that threaten to consume her.

A shot in the dark, because you could still be wrong about this, but if you’re wrong… maybe dying would hurt less.

Your heart knows without a doubt now that the depth of your devotion for her is unwavering, a beacon of light in the midst of turbulence.

A hint of surprise dances across Lorraine's face as she struggles to process your confession. Her eyes narrow slightly, a mix of disbelief and confusion reflected within them. A moment passes, and you see a flicker of recognition, a glimmer of the Lorraine you know returning.

Lorraine's voice quivers as she whispers, "don’t say that, you can’t—I led you astray, I broke us—"

The weight of guilt and self-reproach tugs at her words, and she glances away, unable to meet your gaze.

Not only is she having to persevere the tight hold witchcraft has on her. She’s battling with her own self-doubt and remorse, uncertain of her worthiness of you.

You respond with unwavering determination, your eyes locking onto hers, your voice carrying a mix of passion and challenge.

"Then fix it”.

Your words are not a judgment or a dismissal but a call for her to take charge, to rise above the circumstances and find a way to heal and mend what has been broken.

It’s a statement that echoes your unwavering belief in her ability to overcome, to find the strength within herself to make amends and find her own path back to the light.

In that moment, as you gaze into the depths of Lorraine's eyes, a slow yet palpable shift unfolds. The layers of confusion and doubt gradually peel back, revealing the familiar spark of determination and strength that has always resided within her.

You catch a glimpse of the Lorraine that you hold dear — the one filled with fire and unwavering spirit. It's a transformation that sends a wave of relief and hope coursing through your veins.

Finally, there she is — your girl, the woman you love and value, stirring back to life.

Her throat bobs as she tries to find words, face constricting with emotions, the beginning of a watery gleam forming in her eyes.

As Lorraine’s apologetic ramble begin to form, you swiftly silence her with a heartfelt rebuke, your voice tinged with both relief and a touch of humor.

“You scared the shit outta me,” you laugh weakly, a blend of emotions coloring your tone. The weight of the situation, the fear that had gripped you moments ago, all converges into those six simple words — a testament to the turmoil and worry your heart has endured.

In Lorraine's trembling touch, the weight of her guilt and remorse is palpable. As her bloodied fingers gently trace the contours of your face, wiping away the sigils she had meticulously etched with your own blood, her eyes shimmer with a mix of regret and desperation.

Tears threaten to spill over as she grapples with the gravity of what she had nearly allowed to happen. The raw emotion and vulnerability in her gaze speak volumes — a silent plea for forgiveness and a chance at redemption.

“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry, I don’t know what—“ she chokes out, barely above a whisper as, taking in a breath as she rests her forehead to yours. An attempt to ground herself, you feel her hurting, you feel her.

"Hey, hey," you gently murmur, your voice soothing and filled with reassurance “that wasn't you. You're not responsible for what happened. We're going to work together and put this right," you affirm, emphasizing that you see the difference between the Lorraine consumed by dark magic and the true essence of who she is at her core.

It's a gentle reminder that you acknowledge her struggle, her strength, and your unwavering belief in her ability to overcome this ordeal.

Something hits the ground with a soft thump, and then both her hands are cupping your face, thumb delicately tracing your bottom lip as she exhales.

Whatever remaining strings that had been holding her back seem to strain and snap, you see it in the way the warmth returns to her eyes, in the way her touch is with confidence.

And when her lips press tenderly against yours, an electric spark crackles through the air. Despite the metallic tang of copper, the sweetness of the moment envelops you, intertwining with the familiar softness of her.

In that stolen instant, the weight of the world melts away, and you're transported back to the first time you shared a kiss.

You want to live in that moment.

"My girl," you breathe as you part, voice carrying the weight of affection and acceptance, recognizing the indomitable spirit that resides within her.

Anything lost can be found.

Lorraine's forehead remains rested against yours, sending a gentle wave of calm through your being. As her fingers release your face to deftly work at the bindings that constrain your wrists, a shared understanding passes between you.

Your eyes, filled with unwavering determination, meet hers, reflecting a silent agreement — a pact to face what lies ahead together. You know the challenges that await, but in this moment, united, you're ready to confront them head-on.

Just as you feel the binds loosen from your wrists, Maxine's sharp and dangerous voice cuts through the air, causing a shiver to run down your spine.

"What the hell do you think you’re doing?" she demands, her tone tinged with a hint of knowing that sends a jolt of unease through you. You can almost feel the weight of her gaze bearing down on the both of you, scrutinizing your every move.

With your wrists now free, Lorraine's nimble fingers quickly withdraw, and your collective focus shifts to meet Maxine's piercing gaze.

The air grows taut with tension as her voice, dripping with menace, echoes through the room, setting a chilling precedent for what's to come. The atmosphere is thick with anticipation as both of you brace yourselves for the confrontation that looms just before you.

With a surge of defiant determination, Lorraine steps forward, boldly positioning herself between you and Maxine.

A palpable energy crackles around her, radiating off her figure like an unseen force. Both Maxine and Bobby-Lynn visibly startle at the display of rebellious defiance emanating from Lorraine.

It's as if a dormant power has suddenly awakened within her, a quiet strength that surprises even those who thought they knew her best.

Lorraine’s voice, infused with a fierce determination, slices through the tense air, a clear warning that resonates with unyielding conviction.

"Back off," she exclaims, her tone steady but resolute, “your hold on me is broken. I won’t let you do this”.

As she speaks, her words carry a weight of finality, signaling that the dynamic between them has irrevocably shifted.

The power dynamic that once favored Maxine and Bobby-Lynn has crumbled, and Lorraine asserts her newfound control with unflinching resolve.

Maxine's smirk deepens, and with a swift gesture of her hand, the zombified men shift into position, flanking your small group in an eerie dance of shadows cast by the flickering bonfire.

“Looks like you got what you wanted after all, Lorraine. Power, control… love”.

Their silhouettes, bathed in the dance of flames, seem even more unsettling, as if they're mere puppets manipulated by a sinister puppeteer. The tension in the air grows palpably thicker, as the confrontation escalates to new heights.

Maxine's voice, dripping with condescension, cuts through the tension like a knife. "You were always deadweight anyways," she sneers, her words carrying a venomous sting.

"We're going through with this with or without you”, her dismissive tone conveys the depth of her disdain, emphasizing that Maxine sees Lorraine's dissent as inconsequential — a mere inconvenience in her quest.

With a smooth raise of her hands, Lorraine's power surges forth as voice rings out confidently, challenging Maxine's assertion.

"You want it?" she declare, her tone filled with determination. Just as the words leave her lips, the bonfire responds to her power's ascent, its flames sputtering higher and brighter.

A brief pause hangs in the air, taught like a bow string before she finally utters a defiant provocation, her head tilting up in bravado.

"Come fuckin’ get it”.

previous, next

————————————————————————

Tag List: @thatshyboy1998

[anonymityisfunwriter]

There Is No Coming Back From This - Chapter 2

Characters: Stark!Reader, Steve Rogers, Tony Stark Summary: "It's her time, Tony. And I hate that as much as you do, but there's some things you can't fix. There is no coming back from this."

"Dad?"

"I'm sorry." He reaches for your hand, squeezing it gently. "I couldn't - I couldn't let you die."

"Dad? What did you do?"

He embraces you, whispering, "I'm sorry."

He wakes in a cold sweat from the dream.

Except, it's not a dream. It's the reality he singlehandedly created.

He barely registers his phone blaring on his nightstand until Pepper also jolts upright from he phone's ringer. 

"What? What's wrong?" she gasps. 

"Relax." He pats her hand, jutting his chin toward her nightstand. "It's your phone."

She snatches up her phone, answering on the third ring. 

"Who is it?" he grumbles, still half asleep and rattled from his latest trip down memory lane. "And do they know that it's 4 in the morning?"

She waves him off, abruptly standing out of her bed. "It's Agent Ross."

"It better be important enough for him to wake us up."

"Shh..." Pepper hisses, trying to keep up with Agent Ross' rambling. "What's out of your hands? No, you can't be serious." 

Tony's ears perk up at the sound of Pepper's short, clipped answers and the look of shock painting her face. "What? What's going on?"

Pepper reaches for Tony, ushering him up and out of bed, "Tony, go get-"

Her words are cut off by your blood curdling scream.

There are no other thoughts in his head as he takes off, running faster than he's ever gone before. He can hear your screams for him. Once. Twice. There's a fear in your voice that he's never heard. Not even as you were handed a death sentence. Not even when he told you he'd dosed you with an untested super solider serum days ago. 

When he bursts into your room, he immediately notices two things. 

First, he's not the only person frantically checking on you. Steve and Bruce skid into your makeshift hospital room right behind Tony, the same disheveled yet guarded looks on their faces. 

And second, and most pertinently, a SWORD agent placing you in reinforced handcuffs. 

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" Tony demands, practically lunging at the man until he hears a voice he'd only hoped to never hear again. 

"I wouldn't do that if I were you."

"Dad?" you call out to him, trembling as the agent pulls on your wrists again. 

"It's okay, sweetie. It's alright, I'm going to take care of this," Tony tries to console you from afar. He turns on his heels, glaring at the person responsible for this, "General Ross."

General Ross hands him a warrant. "We have authorization to detain your daughter. She's coming with us."

Tony crumples the paper in his hand, "Like hell you do."

"On what grounds?" Bruce pipes in. 

General Ross' eyes flicker to Bruce, then back to Tony, "We received word that you've been experimenting on your daughter. It's been decided by the council that you and Dr. Banner are no longer fit to monitor such a volatile and dangerous experiment."

"She's not an experiment. She's a child," Bruce finally pipes in.

"A child who is a U.S. citizen - last time, I checked she has rights," Tony remarks, his eyes more on you than anyone else. You're shaking, because you're cold or afraid he's not sure. Your eyes are glassy though you've yet to shed a single tear. And the thing that enrages him the most, there's blood dripping down both your arms, probably where the idiot agent ripped out your IV.

"Those rights were null and void the second you injected her with an untested, highly experimental super soldier serum, Tony. I will not tell you again. You signed the Accords. You agreed to this, remember?"

"I did not agree to this," Tony counters. "And even if I did, you don't have control over Stark intellectual property or its assets."

"That may be, but you've left us no choice. The child is a threat to everyone around her. She's a threat to national security, one that must be contained.”

"And just how long do you plan on holding her?" Bruce interrupts before Tony says anything to further escalate the situation.

"Indefinitely."

"Yeah," Tony scoffs. "Over my dead body will you be taking her."

"I will. Or every person in this compound will be considered an enemy of the State. And don't think I won't have you arrested for aiding and abetting a fugitive," Ross says, looking directly at Steve.

"Enemy of the State?" you exhale, flinching at the severity of the situation and just how quickly it all continues to escalate. You're not even really sure what happens, but one second your arms are unnaturally pulled behind your back and the next they're in front of you, cuffs pulled clean off.

"This is what I'm talking about." General Ross shakes his head, watching you carefully. "You've gone too far, Tony. She needs to be contained and monitored."

"She is being monitored. Here."

"That's not good enough."

Pepper's the next one speaking, having slipped into the room during all of the commotion. "General Ross, can't we have a little time? It's the middle of the night."

"Absolutely not. As far as I'm concerned you are all flight risks with a motive and unlimited resources to escape. The answer is no."

"Just an hour? She's bleeding," Pepper points out the places on your arm where the IV's were roughly pulled out. "I'll even give you the blueprints of the compound and you can station someone at all of the exits. No one will be able to get out without you knowing. Please?"

Ross battles with himself for a moment, wondering just how far he's willing to push all three men. "You have an hour."

"Thank you."

General Ross nods at his agents, ushering them out of the room and out of the building. He utters one last warning as he walks out of the room. "We'll know if you try to escape."

Not a person in the room has a response to that. Instead, Pepper reaches for Tony, embracing him tightly. As discreetly as possible, she whispers in his ear, "You've got an hour."

The entirety of your last hour out in the world is spent with Pepper. She ushers you out of your medical room, back to your old bedroom. She sits you on the edge of your bed and immediately begins fawning over you, brushing your hair from the tangled bed head, braiding it neatly. She tends to the irritated IV site, cleaning it and bandaging it.

"Pepper?" you whisper, stopping her whirlwind movements in their tracks. She turns to you, looking as frantic as you felt. You look up to her, the only mother figure you'd ever known and softly utter, "What's gonna happen to me?"

"I don't know, sweetie." She strokes your face. "But you're going to be okay. Your dad will make sure of that."

The hour goes by like seconds.

Then you're back in handcuffs, being walked outside into the pitch black night. All you can hear is the sound of the engine rumbling and the slight crunch of the gravel beneath your feet.

You're at least thankful that you got to change out of your pajamas and into something a little more appropriate for being hauled off to whatever prison they deem fit for you.

When you finally get to the transport, the man takes no time in placing chains around your waist and to your ankles, effectively restricting all of your movement.

"Are the cuffs necessary?" Tony fumes, watching helplessly as they take you away. "She's voluntarily going with you."

"It's just protocol, Mr. Stark."

There's not a single cohesive sentence you can string together, let alone say, as you're dragged into the van. They take the combined chains and bolt you to the floor.

You watch the despair on your father's face as the agent climbs in behind you and shuts the door.

Even though it's dark, you're still very acutely aware of the gun being pointed at your face. You try to stay completely still, worried that the slightest mishap will be misconstrued as an act of aggression. You focus on the sounds of the person breathing in front of you, that's all you can hear except the rumble of the engine.

You breathe slowly, careful not to move your arms or hands. You think back to when you'd just woken up from your near death experience. You reached for the railing of the bed to ground yourself and broke the thing clean off. It terrified you to your core, thinking about the things you could do. Even on accident.

It simultaneously feels like 5 minutes and 5 hours have passed when the rumble of the engine suddenly cuts, leaving you all in a deafening silence. You hold your breath and try not to panic even as you hear muted thuds and isolated yelps coming from outside.

The very agent sitting in front of you looks at you like you're going to be the one to tell them to go look. They take a deep breath and for the first time all night, there's not a single gun on you.

The man creaks the door open ever so slowly. He takes a moment to crane his neck out into the open, when suddenly another yelp leaves his mouth as he's jerked forward into the night.

"Kid, are you okay in there?" you hear a familiar voice ask.

"Steve?"

Both doors opened to the shining moonlight, you can see the vague outline of Steve Rogers' face. You sigh in relief, "It's you."

"Come on, we don't have a lot of time," he urges, reaching out to grab your hand.

As if you're testing the waters, you experimentally take one hand and try to break the chain on your left hand. It falls away with ease, and you're not sure whether you're terrified or in awe of yourself. It takes you less than a minute to break free of your constraints.

"Where exactly are we going?" you ask, taking Steve's hand and jumping out of the van.

He points into the direction of the heavily wooded area surrounding the lonely road. "We're going right through there."

"There?"

"Just follow me. I won't let anything happen to you," he promises

"Okay," you nod, following Steve's brisk walk into the woods.

The two of you trek through the darkness for quite some time and never once is there a clear path or road that you're following. Steve's confidence and stride never once waver and you remind yourself over and over that you trust Steve. You trust him to keep his word and keep you safe.

"Just up ahead."

You look up and there's a large clearing illuminated by two headlights not far from you. As you get closer, you can make out one shadowy figure. You squint your eyes and crane your neck until you see him.

"Dad," you call much louder than you should in the dead of the night.

You bolt the second you're sure it's him, and the second you're in reach you throw yourself into his open arms. Tony takes a moment to relish in this reunion - to breathe in a sigh of relief that you're okay. That you got away and you're safe in his arms.

Unfortunately, he knows that that moment can't last, and he pulls away.

You vehemently shake your head, not liking the look on his face. "Dad, what's going on?"

"I need you to listen to me, we don't have a lot of time," Tony pleads, grabbing your face with his hands and forcing you to look at him. "Steve will explain everything later, but right now you just need to listen."

You continue shaking your head, but he maintains his grip on you. "Dad, please, just tell me. What's happening?"

"What's happening is you're going to go with Steve, okay? You and Steve are going to go somewhere away from here, somewhere where no one can find you. You stay with Steve no matter what, you hear me? He's going to take care of you. He'll protect you... And I'm not going to see you for a while."

You tremble, "No."

"Listen, you're going to go. Get away from here. And I'm going to fix this. And once I've fixed it, you can come back home. Okay?"

"I don't want to go," you sob.

"I know, I know, I don't want you to go either, but right now you need to be safe, okay?"

"What about you? What if they figure out you're involved with all of this?"

"I will be fine. I'll be completely fine as long as you stay safe. Don't you worry about me for a single minute, because I will be fine. And once I fix this, you can come home. I promise." Tony removes his hands from your face and moves you into Steve's arms. "Protect her?"

"With my life," Steve promises.

Tony nods, seeing the solemnity on Steve's face. He hands you a dark oversized hoodie. "Put this on."

You slip it on and then he's handing you a large black backpack. "Everything you two will need is in here. Money, passports, documents. It's all there."

You see the conflicted look on your father's face as he closes his eyes and exhales deeply. "You don't have a lot of time before they figure out that you're gone. I love you, kid. Don't forget that."

"I love you too, Dad."

And then you're walking away from everything you've ever known.

This time the trek isn't nearly as long or rugged. In fact, before you can process everything that's happened you're back on well-lit pavement. "There's a bus stop just up ahead."

"Where are we going?" you ask.

"As far away from here as possible, as quickly as possible, find a place to lay low while this whole thing blows over."

"Any ideas?"

"I've got a place in mind."

"Are you going to elaborate or are you going for that cryptic, dramatic vibe?" you joke.

He chuckles, slightly shaking his hung head. "I've got a friend that can help."

AnonymityIsFun Masterlist 'There Is No Coming Back From This' Chapter List

Taglist: @marianita195 @meli18gonzalez @ludicbouquetfromearth @matchat3a @famousbreadcherryblossomsstuff @valoraxx @blue786sworld @buckyandgeraltsupremacy @geminigengar @ansaturn @ecolle @lexhalstead3 @ybflkmj @mediocre-daydreams@shanye1112 @thegirlnextdoorssister @toomanyfanficsbruh @moonlightreader649 @breathtaking-cynthia @mirikusashes @beans-and-toast @niyahcoca @katiechikin @elxvrr @antiheroxsblog @infamouslyclumsy @krissydclayton93 @buckysbarne @deadheadwbedhead @qualitygiantshoepsychic @whitexwolfxx310 @getosprettyboy @matchat3a @weallhaveadestiny @mostlymarvelgirl @honeydew3064 @michealharrypotter @mrs-bucky-barnes-73 @withyoutilltheendoftheline @the-photo-hoe @rae-nna @sarachabeans1@double-shot-of-tequila @spookyparadisesheep @lunaalovesyouu @daisy-loves-bucky@roseproseposts @theoraekenslover@king814318 @maybesomedaytho @carlie-babes99 @sunshinechikin @as-white-as-snow-love @melala1030 @badasswlthafatass @armystay89 @multiversefanfics @cherrysscinema @breathlesspieceofdeath @ravenn-darkholme @bxckybxrnes24 @guiltyasreid @bellabarnes1378

[aredeemantagonist]

[OPENING FILE………]

Hiya!! I'm… well I go by a lot of names!!

Most commonly used ones are: - Antagonist/Antag (Mostly used online/amongst my general mutuals + followers!!) - Kris - N - Jack - Michael - Atsushi - Vic - Xavier - Any of my kin names!!

I also go by Mercutio and nicknames derived from that, but please ask me before using that name for me, since I'd prefer if only people who are close to me call me Mercutio or Tio

My pronouns are it/void/gut/gore/rot/pop/he!! No They/Them or She/Her pretty please!!

I am taken x3!!! My boyfriend is @thund3randrain <33 ( #my love <3 on this blog!!) My Queerplatonic partner (and my everything) is @the-fallen-collective ( #meri jaan <3 on this blog!!) My partner is @theonlyrealdazaiosamusblog ( #my dear <3 on this blog!!)

My interests: - BSD - FNAF + Afton Family Lore - Creepypasta - Laceygames - The Amazing Digital Circus - My OCs + Lore - Bendy and The Dark Revival + Bendy and The Ink Machine - The Disasterous Life of Saiki K - Assassination Classroom - Art - Writing - Classic Literature - Palaye Royale - Green Day - My Chemical Romance - Psychology - OC Angst (/jk… or am I?)

18+ users can interact and DM as long as you aren’t icky and comfy with the fact that i am a minor :3

DNIs: - Bad people in general - General DNIs (homophobes, transphobes, misogyonists, etc etc) - Radqueers - Pro-contact - Zoophiles, Pedophiles, etc etc - [Pro] Endogenic systems - Anti-recovery blogs (for EDs, S/H, anything) - NSFW + smut blogs - MDNI blogs - Anti-alterhumanity

MY FRENDOS!!!!!! (tell me if you weren't cool with being @/ed ^^) @star-seeking-stray - big sister, who is INSANE /pos

@lemon-reef - baby sibling, pat pat pat pat pat pat

@valentinos-corner - baby sibling, all the hugs and squishes

@evvwenthome - baby sibling, picking you up and putting you in a bag

@offsetthedeath - parental figure

@icreatethingz - MY SON. BE NICE TO HIM OR ELSE.

@aesthetic-writer18 - HIHI LITERALLY ONE OF MY BEST FRIENDS HIII

@paintedgrilledcheese - i ramble to them so… so much… frendo!!

@casinoownersigma - KIJI MY BIG BROTHER GRRR /pos

@trashlike - friend!! i am the evil feral gremlin child on faer shoulder telling them to make more blogs

@deeply-moonstruck - frendo!!! we yap about lore a lot

@arsonist-lullabye - this one is not normal about ango

@duckduckgoose-exe - goose

@smallpieceofcheese - unhinged mentor /pos

@sayuutoria - (ex?) wife. we keep getting married and divorced and married again

(if you arent here do msg me and i'll add you!!! i have very bad memory so i forget a lot of things ;-;)

I fall under a bunch of alterhuman identies, here are some listed below!!

Fictionkin types: [ID + Permashift] Laughing Jack from Creepypasta [ID + Permashift] Michael Afton (Teen, Pre-Scoop, Post-Scoop etc etc) from Five Nights at Freddy's franchise [ID + Permashift] Serial Designation N from Murder Drones [ID + Permashift] Nikolai Gogol from Bungo Stray Dogs [ID + Permashift] Atsushi Nakajima from Bungo Stray Dogs [ID + Permashift] Chuuya Nakahara from Bungo Stray Dogs [ID + Permashift] Lacey from Laceygames [ID] Foxy from Five Nights at Freddy's franchise [ID] Gregory from FNAF: Security Breach [ID] Foxy from Five Nights at Freddy's franchise [ID] Gregory from FNAF: Security Breach [ID] The Crying Child/Chris Afton from Five Nights at Freddy's franchise [ID] Kaito from Vocaloid [ID] Johnny from Life Eater [ID] Mike Schmidt from the FNAF Movie

Chara from Undertale Sherlock Holmes from the BBC Series Sherlock Bram Stoker from BSD Fyodor Dostoevsky from BSD (An AU where he joined the Agency) Bloody Painter from Creepypasta Eyeless Jack from Creepypasta King Dice from Cuphead Mugman from Cuphead [ID] The Crying Child/Chris Afton from Five Nights at Freddy's franchise [ID + Permashift] Michael Afton (Teen, Pre-Scoop, Post-Scoop etc etc) from Five Nights at Freddy's franchise Kajii Motojirō from BSD Jax from The Amazing Digital Circus Lucy Carlyle from Lockwood and Co. Fukase from Vocaloid Serial Designation V from Murder Drones Vaggie from Hazbin Hotel Nico Di Angelo from PJO Sayori from Doki Doki Literature Club Pomni from The Amazing Digital Circus Officer Vanessa from FNAF Security Breach Henry Stein from BATDR/BATIM Alice Angel from BATIM Boris the Wolf from BATIM The Joker from DC Comics Harley Quinn from DC Comics The Mad Hatter from DC Comics Pennywise from IT Chapter 1 and 2 Sigma from Bungo Stray Dogs Wooly the Sheep from Amanda the Adventurer Flowerfell Frisk from Flowerfell Baymax from Big Hero Six Girlfriend from Friday Night Funkin All Nightguards from FNAF

Otherkin types: - Marionette / Puppet - Computer Glitch - Computer Malware - Ghost - Vampire - Porcelain Doll - Zombie

Conceptkin types: - Abstraction - Puppet of Insanity - Corruption - Manipulated and Blinded

common tags used on this blog:

#antagonist reblogs - i reblog random shit!! won’t always remember to tag though T^T

#antagonist rambles - my incessant yapping!!

#antagonist shitposts - i shitpost

#antagonist stims - self explanatory lmao

#antagonist doodles - my drawings!!

#antagonist wrote something - my fics!!

#antagonist yaps with friends - my chats with my friends!!

#antagonist yaps with anons - anon chats!!

#antagonist used a braincell - my thoughts. could be anything from shitposts to philosophy to maths!!

#antagonist vents - my vents, always check and block the tags pls!!

#antagonist is tired. - i am so so tired.

#antagonist laceyposts - what it says on the tin. i laceypost!

#antagonist is william afton - william afton posting

#man i love michael afton - michael afton posting

#antagonist raises the sun - i say good morning!

#antagonist travels to eep land - i say good night!

My sideblog for roleplaying can be found at: @antag--roleplays ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ vent acc is @antag-after-dark, do not follow this blog. interact/view at your own risk since i do not tag ANYTHING on this blog. i'd prefer if people didn't like or reblog posts on that account either. just reply if you want to comfort me or give me advice, otherwise do not interact

[d6volution]

IDEA FOR CAINE. so you knnow how pomni tought she was in dream? ok so what if we enter the digital circus and thnks its a dream to? where wes tart to do what ever becuase "oh its just a dream" and do it with caine to prove its not but soon later figure that you had actually fucked the ring master and now you have to live with that untill you abstarct. also, i love you...................re writing alot

thank........... you <33

hopefully this is okay! i accidentally made Caine a little mean at the end oops, poor reader.

Caine/Fem!Reader.

nsfw themes. | artwork.

minors dni.

You've been staring at the ceiling all night. Everyone was right.. you don't need to sleep. You don't even feel the urge, it was so.. strange. Unsettling.. it was making your mind feel like an endless void when you thought about it a bit too hard.

You closed your eyes and sighed before hopping out of bed and taking to the halls instead. You needed a walk, get your body moving to distract your mind just a little.

Which did little to help, in fact you were back tracking to your first theory.. surely this all had to just be a dream, you just had to figure out how to wake yourself up. yes that's it! a small sliver of hope.

"Hmm.." You pondered out loud, walking down the long corridor of rooms. Everyone else must be sleep or.. just relaxing their eyes more like. "Caine.. maybe if I.." you were muttering to yourself, walking back and fourth as if you were in some kind of trance.

Little did you know Caine was already watching, one of his eyes were tucked away in the corners of all the large open spaces , including the corridors. He was only half paying attention until you started—

"[Censor] [Censor] [CENSOR!]" Began screaming out every curse word and you would keep doing so until Caine showed up. Which, like clockwork he did.

"Now, now what's all this, y/n!? you'll wake up the others! Not to mention the potty mouth you have! Haven't we been over this already?" Caine said in a cheerful yet assertive tone, staring at you with his hands planted on his hips and waiting for your response.

But you didn't give him one , instead you reached up and gripped his suit collar and yanked him down, planting a kiss onto his jaw just to test the waters. He scrambled and pulled back, "W.. Woah now! What's gotten into your my dear!? You haven't even taken me on a first date yet!" He teased and continued to ramble about how inappropriate and unlike you that was.

Seduce the ringmaster... make him break his own rules, boom. Maybe.. the dream will backfire on itself so bad that you'll wake up?

Or maybe this entire idea was stupid and you're insane!

You shoved that little voice to the back of your head. You had to try something, the whole prospect of being trapped here in the first place was insane!

"A date..? Caine, you've been trapped here for ..well ever! ... Surely you want.. more than just a silly date!" You huffed, and tried to get closer to him but he was keeping his distance. Weary of your actions.

He tugged at his collar as if to fan himself, seemingly a bit tempted by your words, "W—Well , be that as it may, here at the digital circus we have to keep it family friendly we're to be enjoyed by all ages my dear!" He said and twirled his baton a few times within his gloved fingers.

"I know.. but, isn't there somewhere around here we can have a little.. privacy, Caine..~ Just the two of us? I promise no one else will see!"

Caine didn't say anything, he simply cleared his throat and took you by the waist and teleported you both to his quarters. It was grand and a little silly. A red and black theme that matched his outfit, and decor befitting for someone like him.

Caine sat at the edge of his bed and patted his lap.

Oh, god you were really doing this.. was it really this easy??

He tugged you onto his lap, and now you were flushed. But.. he didn't make a move to touch you at all.

"Now my precious , y/n we can start our date! We must take things slow to set a good example!" He said excitedly and flipped on the small tv in front of you both.

Oh we was serious. This.. this wouldn't do... it'd take too long.

You tuned out the television and Caine seemed to just tap his hand on your hip as he laughed at the corny jokes on the tv.

Just then a light bulb went off in your head and you shuffled a little in his lap, ass brushing and grinding against his crotch. You felt him stiffen and try to adjust a little.

"Something wrong?" You said oh so innocently.

"O-Of course not dear! I do hope you're enjoying the show! Bonding is very important for relationships!" He said , seemingly unphased but the sudden hardness poking against your ass was telling you everything you needed to know.

"I agree.. bonding is very important." You said in a low voice while squriming on his lap again, and his hand suddenly gripped your hip. Keeping you still.

"Ahem, heh, I think its best if you keep still dear! Don't want any.. accidents!"

He laughed, albeit nervously.

You took this chance and to turn around on his lap so you were facing him and shoved him onto the mattress. You were straddling him and keeping your palms flat on his chest as you grinded against his clothed erection, "That doesn't feel so family friendly in between your legs Caine.. just loosen up a little.~" You cringed hearing yourself trying to sound sexy but it seemed to be working. He was stuttering and making excuses but didn't push you away. In fact you could feel him twitching beneath you.

Fuck, you were getting more turned on that you thought you would.. when would this dream end..?

You were going to pull back, feeling as if this wasn't working but then you felt two large gloved hands on your ass tugging you back towards him.

"C.. Caine..?"

"Well, it seems I've just thought of way to keep this family friendly and satiate your.. more carnal desires dear! I didn't think you'd be so bold and I must say I'm impressed!"

"W—Well, I just.. I didn't think you'd actually—" You fumbled over your words and Caine took his chance to flip you onto your stomach, snapping his fingers and you were completely naked.

"C.. Caine!? What happened to taking it slow??" You said trying to cover yourself but he made sure you stayed on your stomach , his baton planted on your lower back with a bit of pressure.

"Ubupbup! None of that Y/N," He interrupted and tapped your inner thighs with his baton. Silently signaling you to open your legs and slowly you did, nuzzling the blankets in embarrassment.

"Tsk, tsk, just as I thought! You're making an absolute mess!" He shoke his head in disappointment. Making a spectacle out of your arousal.

"W.. What are you going to do..?" You whined and glanced back at him , his erection straining against his black pants quite clearly.

"Well, I'm going to give you a lesson in sexual education of course! Maybe then you'll believe this isn't a dream."

Your lips cracked into a unsettling smile, realizing the position you were in and.. well you were fucked, literally and figuratively now.

"Oh, don't give me that look dear, where did all that vigor go!?" A silly sound effect followed his teasing words,  "I assure you you'll feel just fine by the time I'm done with you!~ Or... you'll abstract and I'll have to throw you into the cellar with the rest of them! Either way, I have a lesson to get on with!" He said while planting himself behind you , gloved hands gripping your hips.

"Keep still, will you?"

[p0ssywhippedcream]

hii Ophe I hope you're feeling better can I ask how YOU think L would act on a pot gummy? ( it does not have to be a long thing) thxxxx kisses!!!!!!

Okay l would either do A; silent. just complete and total silence. No amount of poking, prodding or begging can get this man to speak or B; So much words. Word tornado. Word vomit. He cannot stop talking for the life of him.

A looks like this;

"L? Honey? L? Babe?" You're poking his cheeks, pulling them like a grandma would and pushing them back to make his lips pucker. He looks fine, audibly breathing but when you look at his eyes it's clear no one is home. The lights are on, he's blinking with a dopey smile and rubbing the hem of his shirt to enjoy the sensation of the soft fabric but literally no one is home.

"L? Sweetheart, talk to me. Are you greening out?" You shake his heads in your hands, trying to jiggle some sense back into your lover but his face remains void of any intelligence that suggests human life.

Eventually you give up and drop it but you continue to look over and check on him. He's unraveled himself from his usual posture and is laying like a snow angel on the carpet. You put a water bottle next to him and sometime in the next ten minutes, it slowly depletes.

You decide this is a pretty good reaction to trying weed for the first time, especially for L and just give him a gentle smooch on the cheek. You ruffle his hair a bit and make sure to place snacks next to him and when he reaches for one you lift his neck up and place his head in your lap so he doesn’t choke.

B is a bit more chaos;

He hadn’t stopped talking about sharks in ten minutes. Ten minutes of “Sharks can loose 35,000 teeth in their lifetime” and “The cookiecutter shark is very complex because..” and you’re really starting to loose it.

You know he’s smart and you really love his big brain but you didn’t realize how much of it was pumped up with shark facts. You didn’t even realize he liked sharks that much.

You hand him a water bottle because his voice has become raspy and he attempts to continue talking while drinking water, resulting in a coughing fit.

You rub his back and pat it as he chokes out, “While sharks are mainly carnivores, the whale shark is actually an omnivore.”

Once he’s done talking about sharks, and no I don’t mean he’s said all he can I mean you distracted him into a different conversation, he just rambles on and on and on about varying things. He talks about the dangers of elevators and the color purple’s meaning and so much other shit that you eventually tune him out and try to enjoy your own high.

Unfortunately when you get the munchies and make your way to the kitchen, expecting to leave him in your shared bedroom, he follows and you realize constant background noise isn’t something you can avoid.

When he finally wears himself out enough a yawn replaces a fun fact every few minutes, you happily drag him to bed and tuck him in. He mumbles nonsense, tells you he loves you to which you kiss his forehead and then tells you to make sure you put your seatbelt on before falling into snores. You set up your laptop beside him and enjoy your favorite show, occasionally glancing at your snoozing boyfriend and finally enjoying being at peace.

And when you bring up later that you didn’t realize he harbored such an affection for sharks, he gives you a strange look and says he doesn’t, sharks are boring.

[stxrmylxve]

Yer’ My Favorite!

Genre: Fluff

Pairing: Sanzu x GN!Reader

Synopsis: It was a fun night, one that you and your childhood friend were going out to let loose. But when you get a little too drunk and he has to drag you home, you just let everything spill.

Request of: @xenamorph93

A/N: hehe this was short but I still thought it was pretty cute! I love writing soft sanzu anyways so this was a treat 😁

You brushed your hair back with a sigh, giggling at the story a man beside you had just finished. Sanzu came up behind you with a small frown, rubbing your shoulders to grab your attention as you turned around to face him.

“Hey Haru!” you say, getting up and slamming into him for a hug as he stumbled back with an awkward smile.

“Y/N… are you drunk?” he asks, already knowing the answer but wanting to truly test just how drunk you actually were.

“Drunk? Me? No.” you say, smacking his chest as you called for another shot, sitting back down at the bar as you rubbed your eyes.

“Y/N its almost midnight, it’s time to go home.” Sanzu says sternly, taking the shot away from your grasp and sliding it down to someone else.

“Hey! That’s mine!” you say, letting out a soft whimper as you huffed and looked the other way.

“Let’s go, c’mon. You’ve got stuff to do later on, remember?” he says as he peels you out of the chair, waving goodbye to the bartender as he slides an $100 onto the counter and walks out with you.

You grumble all the way home, whether it was complaints, ideas, plans, who your upstairs neighbor was in your apartment, and all he could do was listen.

“Y’know I have this one friend. Well, he’s a friend but I don’t want him to be one, I want to be more. But he has like… pretty pink hair, have you ever seen that before? And it’s always so soft to the touch… And little diamond scars on his face that I just wanna’ kiss away! Then his build is crazy, he is so small but at the same time you can tell he has power and abs y’know? Well I bet his dick ain’t small. Anyways, I don’t think it’s mutual so I’m j’st gonna’ leave it. He probably has a s/o already ‘nyways. But he’s still my favorite.” you blab, gazing out into the void as you rambled on, not realizing that you were talking about the very man beside you.

His face began to heat up as you continued on, his grip on you tightening a little as he tried to calm himself. He didn’t really know what to say. He wanted to spill his own heart out like you had just done, but he refrained from it. He was too scared, and plus, you clearly didn’t know who you were talking to; he would have to say it all over again later on anyways.

You paused your rambling as you glanced up at him, catching the rosy tint to his cheeks and ears dispite the dim lighting from the street lights barey lighting anything up. “Hey, are you drunk too? You’re really red too y’know.” you ask, patting his cheeks lightly with a curious gaze.

“No, I’m fine. Just continue, you’re almost home.” he says with a small smile, his bottom lip quivering. You shrugged and continued on as he looked away with wide eyes, his hand shooting up to cup over his mouth so he wouldn’t scream over your cuteness.

[chiss-ticism]

All vampires should get a customary "You aren't you when you're hungry" shirt from their sires.

[bear-of-da-forest]

Force-puppification is so damn hot to me. . .

Initially, finding the idea humiliating. Being treated as a dog? Are you fucking serious? Why would anyone ever want to have their humanity removed and have that void filled in with a leash and a collar, as well as a new title of "pet" ?

Then you do something good, you do something right. Someone comes up and tells you how good of a job you did, talking in a tone just smidge too condescending for your liking. You want to tell them to go fuck themselves. Right as you're about to tell them to shove it, they place a hand on your head, patting you gently while still speaking in a way that makes them come off like they think they're better than you. Where the fuck do they get off treating someone like that? Thinking they're so much superior, you'll fucking show them who's in charge how about that.

A few days later , the same asshole who thought they'd talk down to you wants to give you a gift. . . A gift? An actual apologetic offering? Finally, some damn respect. . . You open the little box they gave you to bury the hatchet, and it's a choker. . . ? It's got a little part on the front for something to attach, which is a little odd stylistically. A gift is a gift, though. The point here is that they wanted to make it up to you, so be the bigger person just call it water under the bridge.

You've been getting a few stares wearing it out, though. Nothing bad that makes you want to take it off, but just more stares than usual when you wear a choker. . . People have also been treating you nicer, or at the very least, the same kind of nice that was coming off as a special way to make you feel inferior. It was a little annoying at first, but at this point, you've gotten used to it. More than gotten used to it, actually. . . It's evolved to whenever someone gives you a compliment, just a regular compliment, it feels disingenuous. It doesn't feel right if they don't act like you're beneath them. . .

A week passes, and your new buddy invites you over to their place. Hell yeah, you have a friend, and you're able to just mellow out at their place? Fucking score. You get there, and the place is nice, kinda. . . It's got an ominous feeling to it, like you need to be on edge just standing in the entryway of the place. Despite intimidation and unease, they're being friendly. You're even offered a thing of biscuits! They're a little odd, unique flavor wise and bone shaped. You're assured they're homemade, so it's not like you're being made to eat dog treats or anything weird. . . probably. . .

You sit on their couch, and everything seems alright. You're a lil uptight because you are in someone's home for the first time, but you'll manage. As your sitting and they keep rambling about all what's been going on in their life your eyes keep darting around the room and drawing some odd questions. You see they got a dog cage in the corner of the living room with string lights intertwined with some of the bars, it looks cute, sure, but it's big. Big enough that whatever sleeps in that thing should have causes a damn earthquake running to the door the second it heard you come in the apartment.

Wait. . . Apartment? How the fuck haven't they been kicked out for having such a big ass dog when they have neighbors in four whole directions? So, you ask. Just an unassuming "Do you have a dog?" With a polite smirk on your face.

There's a bit of silence for a sec, then they get a similar smirk along their face. Not in the same area of politeness but more in the 'I know something you don't' way.

"Oh not yet, but I'm hoping to adopt a new one soon." They shoot you a playful wink.

"See, that actually leads into something. . . You've been liking having that collar on you, right?"

Collar? No, this ain't a collar. That has some implications there if it is a collar, but it ain't. You open your mouth to shoot down whatever they're saying a-

"It was rhetorical, pup. Be a good dog and let me finish, okay?"

You close your mouth and despite the urge to fight what they said you just silently nod in agreement with what they told you to do.

"As I was saying, I know you've been enjoying having your collar on. Anytime I bump into you I see you wearing it, so it's clear you want this. So, since I've been wanting a puppy I think it'd be best if you were my little doggy, alright?"

They stand up and walk over towards the cage, opening it and grabbing something inside before coming back. You can't really tell what it is until you see the clip.

It's a leash.

"Now, I'm not gonna put this on you until you tell me something. . . Are you a doggy?"

You attempt to whimper out a yes but a finger is quickly placed over your lips.

"Remember, dogs don't use people words, okay?"

Can you do this? Should you do this? It's humiliating in the worst possible way. You open your mouth and try to do what they're asking, to let a bark escape your lips, but nothing comes out. It's just too much.

"Don't be afraid, sweetheart, it can be scary going from a person to a puppy but I'll make sure to treat you like my good little pet."

You try again, struggling to form the syllable of a W, stuttering a few times before you're able to do it clearly. It's the same situation with the OO and the F, but you make it happen. It's almost intelligible, which means you have to do it once more.

It's easier this time, you do it quietly but you still let out a decent woof, especially considering it's your first time doing it.

They lean over, clipping the leash to the hook on your choker collar.

"You did such a good job, puppy. I'm so proud of my little dog."

[neptunestoast]

Let's lighten the mood a bit

Hello it is I, random anon who does not know you and has never interacted with you before, what is your opinion of your mutuals?

I know it's you Byxell, but anyways

@moshieee

One of my first mutuals and friends here! Their kind, sweet, and very understanding. Don't let them catch you awake at 3 am though. Very fun to hang out with and just ramble with. Would give hugs, my emotional support void.

@bunnybunnsowo

Very silly, kind, and fun to chill with. He always got some animal pictures on deck to make your day better. Is a goober! Would give head pats

@unfunnyaceartist

One of my other first mutuals, very nice, is funny, underrated asf. They make me laugh with their art, super cool! Would give a high five or a hug(don't talk a lot with them but would like too)

@glitchyk

Funny as shit, super good at art(especially writing), always there to give me courage. Super sweet, makes me giggle too much. Is a sister to me. Would give a high five or a hug

@sunification

Super kind, sweet, underrated, cool, outgoing. Would give a hug or a high five (we don't talk too much but when we do, they are very fun)

@bixell-pixell

Sneaky little shit, funny, is like a sibling to me(we "argue/fight" like siblings) Can't focus for shit, super nice, underrated. Would give a hug and/or high five

@lilithloves-you

Very sweet, a lovely person, cool. Underrated, kind, would give a hug (we've only talk maybe once or twice but I'd love to talk to her more)

@vexation-816

Funny, kind, blunt(in a good way) Cool, acts tough but has a soft spot for certain people, don't let him catch you being depressed (aggressively affectionate) would give a hug or high five

@rabid-mercenary16

Newest mutual, fucking funny, sweet, cool, how the fuck do you draw so fast!??!?! Actual raccoon, makes me laugh to much, kind. Would give a hug or high five

If you'd like me to not @ you please tell me! I know my words are repetitive, but I couldn't think of too many words TvT

These are people who've I've gotten to know a little more than others.

(Idk why yall are friends with me. You are all too cool :])

[wisssp]

Whistling in the Dark

i feel like a broken record but this is a Weasley twins x oc piece & don't read it if you don't like it(:

female reader; first person pov; slow burn; smut; minors-DNI

wc: 1,716

Chapter 7

I wake up the next morning feeling very tired and confused. I have to endure yet another day of the twins and their crazy antics and I also have to suffer through my class with Lupin.

Grand.

I assume my usual seat in the back and wait for the rest of my classmates to file in. I sat, twiddling my thumbs for what seemed like forever until a red head fills in the seat next to me. I try my best to ignore him but I can't help but notice that he smells like a mixture of smoke and fresh rain, not cinnamon.

George.

"Where's Fred at?" I whisper in his direction while I watch Remus start writing on the board. George turns toward me with his eyes wide and his lips pulled into a grin of astonishment.

"How did you know?" He softly chuckles and shakes his head at me. I'm definitely not telling him that I could tell them apart just based on their freckle difference or their laugh or their scent.

"A magician never reveals their secret." I wave my arms around and give him jazz hands, causing him to laugh. Remus smacks a stick against the board to end our buffoonery. He pointedly looks at me and glances under my desk before he begins teaching again.

"Enough of my rambling. Today's class will be pertaining to boggarts. Could anyone tell me what a boggart is?" Professor Lupin glances around the room that is currently void of hands before his eyes land on me.

"Miss Scamander. Since you pay the most attention, please enlighten the class and myself on what a boggart might be." I see the slight smirk gracing his face, causing me to get all flustered. I clear my throat before speaking.

"A boggart is an amortal shapeshifting non-being that takes its form from its observers worst fear." I bet he wasn't prepared for me to be actually paying attention this time. His eyebrows raised a bit, almost as if he was sort of pleased by my answer.

"And what might amortal mean, Miss Scamander?" He tilts his head to the side, eyes trained on mine.

"Amortality is basically a being that was never alive to begin with, therefore can also never die, kind of like a dementor or a banshee." I fold my hands together and place them under my chin, waiting for another question from the professor. He writes down bullet points to encapsulate what he's making me teach the class.

"Wow, miss Scamander, I am very proud of your ability to retain information, especially when you are distracted so often in my class." This comment earned a few snickers from my classmates, causing me to cross my arms and slightly slump down in my seat.

"Is there anything else I can teach the class for you, Professor Lupin?" I squint my eyes a bit and cock my head to the side, getting progressively angrier at his attempts to humiliate me. My slight attitude brings him to drop his smile and stroll down the aisle towards my desk. I straighten up a bit as he got closer.

"Okay, since we want to be brash, why don't you tell me what the boggart banishing charm would be?" He crosses one ankle over the other and towers over me while propping himself up on my desk with one hand. He glances around the class and then focuses on me, making me aware that all eyes were on me at that very moment.

"It's riddikulus." I mumbled and averted my eyes from his expectant gaze.

"I beg your pardon miss Scamader, I don't think I heard your answer." Remus turns around and starts walking toward the front of the class. He stopped at the front of the room and pivoted on his heel, now facing the class.

"The charm is riddikulus, sir." I sat up and projected my voice a bit, making a couple students in front of me jump. I slumped back down in my seat and gave a huff of annoyance when I feel a pat on my thigh from none other than George Weasley, whom I totally forgot was here for a solid minute.

"You get 'em tiger." George whispers in my direction and throws me a cheeky wink. I smiled at his efforts and nudge him with my elbow. He smiles in response and turns his attention back to the board, where Remus is writing down what I had just said. I look around the room to see everyone's quills furiously scratching against parchment and I had a moment of realization.

I don't want to deal with this bullshit.

I debated collecting my things and leaving but I want to cause this man as much embarrassment as he's caused me. I cross my legs, pulling my skirt up a hair, which George notices. He acts aloof and continues to pay attention to the lesson. I then take my time to pull my hair up into a high ponytail, drawing Remus' attention.

George peers at me out of the corner of his eye and I notice him swallow really hard when one of my shirt buttons comes undone. I then place my hands back in my lap, sandwiching them between my thighs.

"Please, Lady Bird, have mercy." George groans from beside me. I turn to look at him, feigning innocence.

"Oh, whatever could you be speaking of, Georgie? I haven't done a damn thing." I bat my eyelashes and give him a sly grin. He practically growls at the use of his nickname and places his head on the desk.

"Mister Weasley, you don't have to go home but you can't stay in my class if you intend on sleeping." He's just on one today. I chuckle a bit which deters the professor's attention to me.

"Miss Scamander would you mind not disturbing those around you? If I hear myself saying your name again, I might just-" his eyes bore into mine and then suddenly dropped to my partially unbuttoned shirt, creating a block in his train of thought.

"You might just what, sir?" I cross my arms, slightly pushing my breasts together. His eyes don't leave me. I notice his temper rising when I lean forward and open my mouth, about to fire off another smart remark.

"See me after class. I don't wish to hear anything more from you until then." He turns back towards the board.

Class continues for about half an hour until he dismissed everyone. I waited behind for the second day in a row, however this time I was angry. Remus closed the door behind the last student and turned my way.

"How dare you try to humiliate me just because you're jealous? Why would you even begin to question my integrity as your student when you of all people know how hard I busted my ass over at Ilvermorny. You know what-" he cuts me off by placing a hand over my mouth and gently placing his other hand on my shoulder.

"I understand I let my emotions get the best of me, and that was wrong. However you also had no right to lose your temper with me. I know i've been in your life for a good portion of it, but within this castle, I am somewhat of an authority figure to you and you will treat me as such. I do apologize for attempting to humiliate you, but you did a fantastic job at 'teaching the class for me' or whatever you said." He looks at me with a hint of guilt in his eyes and drops his hand from my mouth.

"Thank you Remus-er Professor Lupin. My bad." I laughed a bit and tucked some hair behind my ear. I then stepped back and gave him a small salute.

"I will not be a smartass in class from this point forward." And with that, I shot him a smile and walked out the door. I very quickly notice that George was waiting for me across the hall. He jogs my way and rests his hand on my shoulder, a look of concern dousing his face.

"Well good to know you survived. How bad was it?" He looked at me curiously as I responded with a slight chuckle.

"Not bad at all really, I mean I feel like that's where you, Fred and I have it easy. We've had Remus in our lives for what seems like forever, so he has to put on the mask in front of everyone else." I shrugged and continued walking to my next class.

"So where's Fred? You never answered me earlier." It was my turn to ask questions now. George's ears turned pink and I knew this was going to be interesting.

"Well, uh...I don't really- I just-" He started stumbling over his words and I smacked him on the arm.

"Just tell me, c'mon now." I tried to contain my laughter at how nervous he was getting. He sighed.

"Fred told me about what happened in Lupin's class yesterday and I got jealous because frankly, it's just bloody unfair. You're this beautiful woman and I don't understand where that kid's manners went. I would like to do this right, may I please take you to dinner?" It was my turn to grow pink. I didn't realize it until that moment but Fred really hadn't romanced me in any way. We just kind of fooled around.

"George, you're incredibly sweet and I would absolutely love to go to dinner with you but please don't be upset with Fred. I swear I'm just a girl." I stick my hands up in a mock surrender when he softly pushes me to the side.

"We'll talk more about it another time, it's nothing to lose sleep over but it's definitely something I've been meaning to speak to you about." George shoots me a soft smile and leaves me at the front of my next class, where I walk in to find Fred sitting towards the back with an empty seat next to him. He pats the vacant spot and sends a wink my way. I roll my eyes and make my way towards him.

These boys I swear.

[parameciam]

time for another one of my deeply personal autistic ramblings, feel free to skip since this one it's a bit heavy and depressing and it's mostly to get this out of my chest. a literal scream to the void. and really personal. and depressing.

so. everyone that follows me already knows I'm a late diagnosed autistic person, right? funny thing it's that because nothing ever goes right because my therapist had several tragedies happening in her personal life at the time, she never sent me the report with the details of my diagnosis xd that was two years ago but now that she's okay, she offered to do several sessions with me + adding several other mental health assessments to what we did in the past (for free, ofc. we've done half of our scheduled sessions)

it's not a surprise that the results are fundamentally that I'm pretty fucked up and need therapy. but it's still hard to have test results that confirm it, and hear a professional tell me that I need to heal a lot of trauma, and confirm that I have rejection sensitive dysphoria, and concerningly high levels of social anxiety, and depression.

and I know I need help, but I also know that I'm absolutely tired. so so so fucking exhausted of trying. and add to that I've never, ever in my life, had that internal drive and motivation to keep going and achieving things, I don't understand (not now and not in the past, probably never in the future either) why people always talks like living is so important and the greatest thing ever, I honestly am here against my will and I just keep going to avoid hurting the people around me.

but I don't have any goals or ambitions, and sometimes I think about it and feel shame. most of the time I barely feel like a human being. I have no idea wtf I'm doing here, and it's like I'm constantly pretending to be human, while actually being, idk, several traumas and a braincell in a trench coat xd

and starting another attempt at therapy would require not only money (that I don't want to use for that, and psychological/psychiatric help is so expensive! and the meds too -_-) but also to delve into so many painful things that I don't want to remove anymore.

I hate that I'm the one that has to gather all the broken pieces to mend myself. I hate how lonely I feel. I hate how much of a failure I feel I am. I hate that there's no actual way to feel better without fighting so many things first.

all I want is to stop feeling this broken and exhausted ;=; and maybe a hug and a pat in the head.

today was the first day of a music festival that my sister invited me to and I wasn't even able to enjoy it. concerts used to make me feel so alive and happy, but I'm feeling more and more like an empty husk these days. it's like I'm barely able to enjoy nice things anymore. and I know that's the depression and burnout.

the only thing that gives me some happiness is writing my silly little fics. my withered soul suddenly blooms when I write my hallucinations xd I keep adding wips to the pile to give my mind a sense of future, I guess. something that's an excuse to be excited about.

ahhh, i'm just rambling at this point. let's close this horrible rant with a song.

it's actually my favorite song ever, probably that says a lot about me ahaha