#PLUS he really wants ianto and him to be more

[patrice-bergerons]

I'm not sure where exactly I am going with this yet but I want to write a janto fic in which, due to the effect of something alien or other, Ianto is banned from having sex for a 1-3 month period lest he die.

And set it in early season 2, when Jack just came back and they have sorted of started to go on proper dates but everything they've done has always ended up with them shagging.

Like take away their primary love language at a point in time where this budding thing between them is so tentative and new and see where they go from there, you know what I mean?

[littlegaybean1]

Ok ok ok...

It's been almost 18 years since it aired, but who cares I'm talking about it anyway.

I've seen a lot of people hating on Cyberwoman. And yeah, I understand why. That costume choice was, er, quite something. But it's still my favourite episode and yk why? The build up. The plotline. And most of all the acting. Oh my god the acting. My favourite scene has got to be the tourist office, because oh my days have you seen the way Gareth David Lloyd plays Ianto? It gives me chills. After watching it, I rewatched Everything Changes and Ghost Machine because I never actually noticed Ianto in them, unless he's speaking. The only time you ever see him is when he intentionally draws attention to himself, which he rarely does. I watched them again, specifically focusing on Ianto. He's barely in them. He's one of the main 5 characters, but in the first three episodes he has one of the most minor roles. Like, you see him let Gwen into the Hub, delete the stuff she typed to make herself remember and see him introduced. That's it for episode one. And yes, everyone has a minor role in that, but you never actually see him as part of the team. He works alone, always.

Episode three really highlights that for me. He appears every so often with a funny comment. He has less screen time than Rhys. If it wasn't for the fact that I was actively thinking about him, I would have completely forgotten that he was there. One of his rare appearances really got to me - the ending. Jack gives him the ghost machine to put in the secure archives. That's normal, the archives are his area.

Except Jack doesn't even look at him. He just holds it out, like Ianto is a servant, not someone with years of experience dealing with aliens. Ianto worked at Torchwood One. He was the most qualified of anyone on that team when each of them joined. Owen was medically trained, but no experience with aliens. Tosh was a genius, but she had only experienced aliens through wrong blueprints of their technology, plus a charge of treason. Gwen had police training, nothing more. She got a job by being stubborn, and in the right place at the right time. Jack was reckless, dangerous, and did not want to join Torchwood. He only did it because he needed to do something in the 100+ years that he would be waiting for the Doctor.

Ianto had everything taken from him all at once, and nobody bothered to check on him. He looked fine, so they didn't give it any more thought. They of all people should know that that's not how it works. Ianto was repressing his grief, exhausting himself with the amount he worked both at his job and caring for Lisa. He never had any desire to cause anyone any harm. He was blinded by overwhelming grief. When humans experience loss, the automatic reaction is to cling to what you have. For most people, that means reaching out to friends and family, creating a support system. Ianto lost all his friends, all at once. We don't hear about his family until S3 (goddamn S3), but it's implied that they aren't close. I haven't listened to any of the audios, so if there's more to it than that then I don't know it.

Ianto had nothing, except an echo pretending to be Lisa. He did the most natural thing in the world, clung to what he had. Or at least, what he thought he had. Don't blame Ianto for the events of Cyberwoman. His actions correlate with normal reactions to grief. Yes, his actions were extreme. But so was his grief.

[gmariam321]

I feel like I've probably shared this before, but it was in my Unfinished Torchwood folder so I thought I'd share it today, even if it is again. If I didn't ever post it, I wonder why; if I did, my apologies for the double post, but it's cute and it was fun to edit since it's been a year and a half since I did any real writing. Enjoy! And maybe I'll work on some more of the stuff in my unfinished folder!

Don't get mad, get even

"So, how did the rest of the night go?" Owen asked from his station, his feet on the desk as he twirled a pen in the air and smirked. "You score?"

"Do you really want to know?" Ianto asked in return, turning around on his own chair and giving Owen a skeptical look.

"Not particularly," Owen replied. "Not at all, actually. Don't know why I even asked. Only you two are so strange sometimes…" He trailed off, chewing on the end of the pen, shaking his head.

"I'm sure I'm going to regret this, but what was so strange about last night?" Ianto braced himself for some intense piss-taking from the doctor, who seemed to delight in it more and more the longer they worked together.

"You and Jack," Owen said. "If Tosh hadn't walked in on you snogging in the tourist office a few weeks ago, no one would ever know you were shagging again. It's like a classified secret or something."

"Maybe we’re simply more private," Ianto suggested. "And professional."

"You're something," Owen said, shaking his head again. "Here we are, hitting the pub after work to celebrate the end of the longest week ever, and you two are still playing at Jeeves and Wooster. You can be a bit more casual after hours, you know."

"And you want me to—what? Feed him chips when we're out in public? Hold hands and whisper in his ear?" Ianto asked. "Stick my tongue down his throat and put on a good show?"

"Oh my god, you're going to make my brain bleed," Owen complained. "I'm just saying, if you're sleeping together, you can act like it. We all know now."

"We do act like it, Owen," Ianto replied, turning back to his computer. "When we're alone and we’re—"

"Don’t say it."

"But you thought it."

"Sod off."

"You brought it up, Owen." Ianto is still not sure why, though.

"And I'm not done. You flirt and joke, but Jack does that with dead trees. You don't hold hands, don't dance or kiss or make googly eyes—"

"I'm not sure Jack knows how to make googly eyes," Ianto said, holding back a grin at the thought of Jack with some sort of vapid love-sick look on his face. "He is well over a hundred and fifty years old."

"Wow, only six times older than you," Owen drawled. "Way to bag 'em, grave robber."

"He's immortal, Owen," Ianto replied, and this time he did turn around and grin. "Age is a meaningless number to him. But experience—experience makes all the difference in the world." He let his gaze go distant as he thought about some of the experiences Jack had shared with him. “And Jack has experience.”

"I am so done with this conversation," Owen grumbled.

"What, the one you started?"

"I'm finishing it. Go file some paperwork or something."

"But I didn't answer your question," Ianto said. He had to admit, he was having too much fun with Owen to stop now. Plus, he did have some gossip, of a sort.

"I don't want to know if you scored anymore, unless you both picked up a bird and—"

"Nope, not that," Ianto interrupted quickly. "But the rest of the night was interesting. And not in a tawdry way," he added.

Owen was quiet. He threw his pen in the air a few times, spun around in his chair, blew out a breath, and turned back to Ianto. "Now it's my turn to regret asking, but how so? Something happen after I left?"

"Jack got pissed," Ianto told him, lowering his voice as he glanced back at Jack's office. "Completely shit-faced blitzed."

Owen looked confused. "What?"

"He was loud and laughing, extremely handsy, and stumbling around. I even had to help him," Ianto cleared his throat, "with his trousers. In the loo."

"I bet you did," Owens smirked. "And I bet he loved that."

"Actually, I'm not sure he remembers," Ianto replied thoughtfully. "He practically passed out on the way home. I half carried him up to my flat—it was like wrangling an octopus—and put him to bed only for him to jump up and run for the bathroom. Ten minutes later and the octopus was back. He slept straight through 'till morning."

Owen was giving him a very strange look, both amused and disgusted. "And let me guess, you made him toast and brought him some paracetamol with your best coffee in the morning?"

"Well, yes," said Ianto, feeling defensive. "He's actually done the same thing for me."

Owen shook his head and started laughing. "Ianto, you do know that Jack can't get drunk, right?"

"Of course he can," Ianto replied. "I've seen him drink many times."

"And have you ever seen him stumbling drunk?" Owen asked.

"Well, no, not since we've been….you know," Ianto answered. "Why do you think he can't get drunk?"

"Because he told me," Owen replied smugly. "After my first really bad case, we went out to some skivvy bar to put it behind us, and although I don’t remember everything from that night, I do remember Jack being perfectly fine to drive my arse home because, as he put it, 'I can't get drunk.'"

"That's ridiculous." And yet, Ianto had a bad feeling that Owen was right. He couldn't actually remember seeing Jack drunk before, or hungover, and he'd definitely seen Jack drink before. And Jack had been dramatically over the top last night, as well exceptionally quick to recover that morning.

"That's what I thought,” Owen said. “He told me then, and he'd probably tell me now, that he metabolizes alcohol too fast for it to affect him that much. He's never been a big drinker, but I've seen him put down a fair few. He might get a little loose, but that's not hard for Jack." He sniggered and continued. "My guess is it has something to do with his immortality. He literally burns up the alcohol before the rest of us have finished our first pint. Sort of like how he never gets sick either."

"He told me last weekend that his allergies were bothering him!" Ianto exclaimed. "I made us soup for dinner." He stood up, took a step toward Jack's office, then turned back, staring at Owen. "Are you serious? He really wasn't drunk last night?"

"I think you've been had, mate," Owen told him, and he actually sounded like he felt bad for Ianto.

"I can't believe he'd do that," Ianto muttered. "What the hell was the point?"

"Who knows how his warped brain works," Owen told him, then motioned him closer. "But may I suggest not getting mad, but getting even?"

Ianto glanced back at Jack's office, still tempted to storm in and give Jack a piece of his mind before cutting him off from coffee and sex for the rest of the week. It was only Thursday; Ianto could survive, but he knew it would be rough punishment for Jack. Then he glanced back at Owen.

"Any ideas?" he asked.

"Not yet, but between the two of us, we should be able to come up with something good." Owen grinned as he stood up. "Come on. A pint on me to ease your sorrows while we plot."

Ianto couldn't help but grin back with a nod. "I think we can come up with something not just good, but brilliant," he said. He grabbed his coat from nearby and headed out the cog door with Owen, a dozen different ideas already plotting through his head.

Jack might not be able to get drunk, but he wouldn't know what hit him when Ianto was done with him.

* * *

[meta-squash]

Some other general all-over-the-place Torchwood thoughts that are coming up as I'm writing a post-Cyberwoman fic:

I'd love to know why they decided Ianto canonically lives in Radyr. It would make sense if, like Owen between seasons 1 and 2, Ianto maybe moved to Radyr. But I feel like it would make much more sense for Ianto to live in Splott or Roath or someplace like that in season 1, or at least while Lisa was still in the hub.

Radyr is a fairly nice, well-off area and a shortish commute (30mins) but still longer than Ianto probably would want. If he was planning on restoring Lisa to health and then leaving and taking her with him to live somewhere else, I would think he'd want to live in the cheapest place he could find. I also think he'd want to live somewhere very close to the hub, so he could get there as quickly as possible if something went wrong with Lisa in the night. If he were in Splott/Roath/Adamsdown/somewhere like that, it would be both cheap(er) and a less than 15 minute drive to the hub in the day, probably even shorter at night. (Plus it would totally explain his "I believe estate agents pronounce it 'Splo' quip in Day One.)

I've also always hated the weird timeline of Ianto's early Torchwood 3 employment. By Fragments, he's been there less than 2 years. Which would mean that by the time of Suzie's death, he'd probably only been there a month or two. I feel like all of the stakes and all of the interactions during Cyberwoman would make so much more sense if he'd already been there at least 4 months or longer. His "When was the last time you asked me anything about my life" is a much heavier truth if he's been there long enough that they're comfortable with him and consider him a fully established part of the team and not just someone still a little new. It would probably take him months to use Torchwood's resources to find Tanizaki, plan out all the details of getting Lisa well and getting all three of them safely out of and away from the hub, and get contingency plans in place. The stakes would be much higher if he'd been keeping her alive for like 4 or 5 months rather than just 2 or 3, meaning the shock of her not actually being fully Lisa and the manipulation of cyberman-mind would be a lot more intense and Ianto's denial a lot stronger.

On the opposite end of the observation spectrum, I'm so glad they kept in the "You think you're a hero, but you're the biggest monster of all" line, which was originally supposed to be cut. A lot of Jack's behaviors are really fucked up and horrible. Sometimes it's because he doesn't have a choice (Small Worlds), sometimes it's because he's too emotionally involved (Cyberwoman) and sometimes it's just plan fucked up (Combat). I think it's a great quote for Ianto to say because it really does highlight the things Jack does or the decisions he makes or the commands he gives that go just a little too far. And it reveals the lack of that "how far is too far" questioning, the examination of what is ethical or humane or whatever. And because Jack is immortal he constantly has to live with his actions, and there's always that question of will he become numb to it all. And of course that sentiment that he's the biggest monster of all is constantly turned on him again and again by other people and he has to continue to live with it and decide whether it hardens him or whether he allows it to change him in a more progressive or positive way.

[torchwood-99]

My Favourite Torchwood Looks

So the thing I really love about Gwen’s windbreaker is the colour. Not only does it look pretty, but the light green makes her stand out in a way that really suits Gwen as the newbie, and the pale mint green is just begging to get splattered in blood and dirt. You see Gwen wearing this and it’s obvious what is going to happen to her, and her jacket, by the end of the episode.

Obviously Jack’s coat is iconic. I know he goes through a few variations of coats, and styles them all similarly. I like it with this dark blue shirt the most, and I think the coat looks best in Countrycide, against the fields and grey brick and the Brecon Beacons. When he wears it in Cardiff, he looks really out of time, which makes sense. But in the seemingly abandoned village, where his team are all dressed in heavier clothes as well (apart from Gwen in the above jacket) he actually fits in for once. It pits him firmly against the cannibals along with his team, which is fitting seeing as he’s the one who saves them in the end.

Owen wears this jacket quite a lot, I think. I just really like how it looks with the blue shirt. This is one of the first moments where we see Owen scared, and realise just how vulnerable Owen is under his tough front.

Tosh looks so gorgeous. Love the colour blocking with the red and black, and the lapels of her coat. 

Gwen just looks so adorable in her police uniform, hair drenched from the rain, giving that big wide eyed surprised look that she wears so well. Especially in the earlier seasons. This look just feels like it sums Gwen up at the beginning. In a uniform, firmly in the real world, about to be sucked into something totally new.

Ianto wears so many suits, but this is my favourite variation. Like with Tosh, I love the red and black, and I think the stripy tie goes so nice with the shirt and black blazer. Plus, this is the scene where he and Gwen link arms (iconic) and the red of his shirt complements Gwen’s warm brown blouse.

Just such a gorgeous shade, and I love how soft and romantic the blouse is. Tosh dresses much more femininely than Gwen, which makes sense for their personalities and their job roles, seeing she spends less time in the field than Gwen.  She looks really beautiful in these rich shades, and the flowy fabric is so nice.

Ianto in red and black again! But this time with a suit coat with a pointy up collar! I love a pointy up collar! And I love coats like this.

My favourite Owen look, and sums him up perfectly! The Doctor’s lab coat with all the badges. It’s one of the first looks we see him in, and the one he wears where he is introduced to Gwen and the audience. Seeing as he’s the first to break out laughing, and to confess to ordering pizza under Torchwood, the playfulness of the badges sums up his role in the scene perfectly!

Just a really pretty look on Tosh. I don’t think we usually see Tosh’s arms so bare, which makes sense seeing as this is the moment where Mary reveals herself as an alien. Tosh, falling in love, is likewise more open and revealing in her clothes. The soft, draping fabric and the colour works perfect for a character falling in love.

Gwen looked sooo pretty on her wedding! I actually think she looked better after the fight with the Nostrovite, when her hair was a bit more mussed up. I just wanted a close up of the veil.

This is Ianto’s coat again! I just really liked how it looked in the rain and the streetlights, bonus for his (and Gwen) delightful smiles.

Love LOVE the long leather coat over the skirt. It’s just so flattering, the pink peeking though under the collar, the dark colours with the light pink. She looks so sleek and elegant.

God Gwen looks so gorgeous in this top! As a costume piece, it’s great seeing as this is a Gwen focussed episode, so the bright colour draws attention to her. Plus, as an episode it’s all about Gwen’s compassion, but also death and life. So bright blood red fits all that to a tee. 

This is my other favourite Owen costume. Owen’s had such a god awful time at this point, so seeing him at Gwen’s wedding, clapping and smiling and asking Tosh to dance, is so beautiful. 

This look kind of gives me a lab coat with badges feel in reverse, but instead of the formal lab coat made informal with the badges, it’s an informal t-shirt made suitable for a wedding with a boutonniere. I love imagining how Owen ended up with the flower on his shirt. Was it his idea, did Tosh or Ianto force it on him? I wonder where they found it. I kind of love picturing Tosh and Ianto telling Owen he needs to smarten up before the ceremony, and Banana Boat (who was in charge of flowers) pops up and is all “Need a corsage? The Best Man has you covered!” 

Awesome leather coat on Tosh, just needs a shout out. Also love what Mary is wearing, that skirt and those tights are awesome.

I just adore this blouse on Gwen! In a scene where the highlight is Gwen and Ianto linking arms, I love that the sleeves on this blouse are such a focal point. The bell sleeves are a departure for Gwen, and they’re so soft and romantic and they flatter her perfectly, as does that lovely neckline. Also love the warm brown, which looks amazing on her, and suits her grounded and tough, but passionate and gentle personality.

Leather coat on Gwen! Long leather coat on Gwen!

This is the first episode (KKBB) where we see Gwen in leather, which was introduced to show how she had levelled up after Jack has left, and it was down to her to take charge. 

The top underneath is awesome too.

Long woollen coat on Tosh! 

I just really like coats ok!

Tosh looked so beautiful on Gwen’s wedding day. Most of all I love the red and white flowers, and the silver necklace. The red, the purple, the white and silver just look so gorgeous together.

Such an iconic scene. What I love about this jacket (and her trousers which you can’t see here) is that she kind of makes me think of fighter pilots, which means she really complements Jack. When the two are standing side by side, watching the helicopter burn, after so much time apart.

Black jacket and red shirt. We see this look on Gwen a lot. It’s pretty much her signature, I think. If I want to cosplay as Gwen, I’d go with a leather jacket and a red shirt.

But I love this look the most because of how beautiful she looks when she’s messy, especially with her smudged makeup and extra especially her wavy, messy hair.

Favourite looks for Jack and Ianto here. Both without their top layer, so we get to see Jack in his waistcoat, and Ianto in his red shirt. Both have rolled their sleeves up too, which is double points, and it means they look like they go together even though they’re in opposite colours.

Owen needs a black jacket, red shirt moment too!!! We can’t leave him out. And I do love this shirt on him, especially with the jacket.

Like I was going to leave out the episode where Owen wears a necklace!

And it’s Gwen’s wedding dress again! This is Gwen in the dress Ianto got her, and her stomach is baggy and splattered with alien blood, but despite that, she looks utterly radiant. Glowing. I love her jewellery, and her hair curls now that they’re a bit more bedraggled. I always thought she looked a little stiff and overdone in her wedding clothes when she was first going down the aisle. It makes sense she would be uncomfortable with the alien bump, but at the same time, I think this just shows that Gwen is happiest and at her most confident when she is fresh from a bloody tussle with an alien shapeshifter.

[this-is-quite-homoerotic]

Yo! What did you think of the Expectant audio? I think it's the only TW audio that I listened to and thought mmm, that could've been so much more :( I get that it needed to have action and adventure but it kinda felt really obvious that the writer wasn't comfortable with Barrowman's dream. I think I expected better after how good so many audios like Broken have been :(

I’ll forgo spoilers in the first part for those who haven’t listened to the audio but might be interested in seeing a review, but there’ll be spoilers under the cut!

Anon, I agree with you! It definitely could have been so much better. I actually like the concept of the audio a lot, but the execution was... not to my taste, let’s say. To be fair, it really is a matter of taste, I personally didn’t like the humour, it did not mesh well with my sensibilities, though I also think it felt... outdated? I’m talking specifically about the sense of humour here.

The kind of jokes they made felt like something I might have found funny in the early 2000s when I didn’t know any better, before I examined some of the tropes/messages/expectations I’d absorbed from society and media (more about this under the cut because spoilers). The thing that bothered me the most about it was that it felt to me like the humour in it had not caught up to 2020 sensibilities, and Expectant is, first and foremost, a comedy piece. So if the humour’s failing then that’s a big problem.

Your mileage may vary, though, humour is a matter of taste after all. Interestingly, I actually think John Barrowman enjoyed the script and had fun getting to act it out? This is just the impression I got (certainly, he might have played it a bit differently if he didn’t), and I think this might be a generational thing as well as a matter of taste and sense of humour.

Spoilers below

As I said, I actually love the general concept of the audio: Jack, grieving and at a loss for what to do in the face of losing half his team, offers to carry an old alien friend’s child for them when political scheming means the unborn child might be in danger, in the hopes of ensuring the child’s safety, political stability for several planets, and (it is implied) as a symbol of hope that there’s good things in the universe too, not just loss and devastation.

There are obvious obstacles to Jack carrying a pregnancy while still being an active Torchwood agent, which is an interesting and fun thing that’s explored from the first scene: Jack has got used to being immortal and doing his job might well get him killed. Normally this isn’t a problem but if he dies while pregnant the baby can die too. But Torchwood is understaffed and still adapting to being a three-person team, so Jack has agreed to carrying the baby only if he can keep on working.

An interesting premise, vaguely tied in with a big moment from the show and the emotional fallout which wasn’t explored much in the show itself (Tosh and Owen’s deaths and how they affected Jack), some stakes from the get-go, plus a new original alien character (Jonty). So far, so good.

There are two main things that got in the way of me enjoying the audio: 1) how Jack was depicted as being hysterical during the pregnancy (and this being played for laughs), and 2) the indirect fatshaming (literally why, this was so unnecessary).

In the first case, they decided to write Jack as so emotionally unbalanced by the hormonal changes of the pregnancy that he had severe mood swings, with him breaking down crying supposedly triggered by insignificant things (like when he cries over a cupcake? Or something similar, I can’t be bothered to check). Jack having a meltdown would not be a bad thing to explore in an audio, except it felt to me as though they were using it as a joke? Like a “ha ha look how messed up he is by being pregnant, he’s so hormonal and out of control, isn’t that hilarious? Isn’t it so funny that this character is breaking down like a hormonal woman? Isn’t his pain just the funniest thing you’ve heard? :))))” (Sidenote but I also felt like John Barrowman overacted in these scenes, it didn’t sound like he was crying, it sounded like he was play-acting crying, and that didn’t help.)

The second thing was the whole fat camp-style spa subplot. While trying to get Jack to safety, Jonty takes Jack, who is heavily pregnant and showing, to a ““health spa”“ (read: weight-loss place) where Jack is put under a strict unhealthily-restrictive diet (especially given that he’s pregnant??), controlled by the overbearing spa lady (she literally takes food off his hands and watches him like a hawk to make sure he doesn’t “”overeat””), repeatedly fat-shamed, and this is all presented as a funny gag, presumably because he’s not really fat, he’s just pregnant! But people don’t know because he’s male/male-presenting, so all the micro-aggressions and abuse he’s subjected to are funny, right? Jack not being allowed to eat despite being hungry and heavily-pregnant is totally something to laugh at, surely (/s).

Disclaimer: this is not actually portrayed as though the fat-shaming is righteous and just behaviour, it’s sort of implied that the “”health-nuts”“ running the place were obsessive and weird, but that doesn’t change the fact that the whole subplot could have been something else entirely? Like, they obviously thought this was funny. Also, I won’t get into specifics but I am personally sensitive to these issues, so I can definitely see how some people might not be turned off by this at all; as I said, your mileage may vary and this is my own take on it.

So, these are my main issues with the audio. I don’t think the writer was uncomfortable with the concept as you say, Anon; I’d actually argue the opposite. It’s just that their take on it and their sense of humour were maybe not very in-tune with modern sensibilities (or with mine, at least) and the story suffered for it.

They took a look at the idea (a male/male-presenting character being pregnant) and came up with the worst tired comedy tropes for it: mood swings (and the resulting distress) played up for laughs, an emphasis on how big the character got being made fun of/criticised with an incomprehensible fatshaming subplot, they even threw in a reference that Jack’s previous pregnancy (mentioned in his first line in ep 1 of Torchwood) was a student prank (because men being pregnant is funny, I guess). Okay, that last one is a bit unfair, I just didn’t like it. They could have made Jack’s first pregnancy something meaningful (him carrying a friend’s child as a surrogate out of love for that friend, him carrying his own child born out of a relationship, etc.) but instead they made it into a cheap one-liner joke, and yeah it does fit into the tone of the audio, but that’s the problem: I did not like the overall tone of it.

There were some scenes with Ianto that were nice, and a couple of Owen and Tosh mentions that I enjoyed, and it’s interesting that you mention the action and adventure in your ask because I actually didn’t mind those aspects at all? The action was fine with me, it was the non-action parts mostly that bothered me (the emotional tone and sense of humour like I said).

This is probably more thoughts that you wanted but I was quite disappointed with this one (and I was so looking forward to canon mpreg), so I thought I’d take the opportunity to explain why. I do acknowledge that it was a matter of my own sense of humour and sensibilities not meshing well with the writer’s (I just checked and to my shock the writer is a woman; I would have put money on them being a cis man).

This one missed the mark with me. Badly.

[rentalboos]

Not sure if you do requests but idea for a fic: a friend at the Doctor and the Master's wedding (13+Dh) proposes to their partner and steals the spotlight from the couple getting married. In an act of revenge, the Doctor and the Master furiously try to conceive so they can announce their pregnancy at the friend's wedding.

You asked, you shall receive! Because I really liked the pettiness of this whole concept lmao

It had started off as a joke.

“Let's invite Jack,” she had said, “he'll make every party entertaining, even if it's a one man show.”

It was a necessary thought, at the time, considering they really didn't have a lot of common friends left to invite to their wedding. Even less who would come to show their approval of it. The few people she would've possibly had considered safe to invite were all dead and gone along with Gallifrey... again.

“Let's invite Jack,” the Master had replied with a nod and a nasty grin, “he'll absolutely hate every second of having to watch you getting married to me.”

The Doctor had, fairly quickly, bid farewell to that particular idea.

He had a point.

The Master, however, morally carefree just like she knew (and apparently loved) him, had sent him an invite regardless.

And it had come back to bite him in the arse.

“I'll kill him,” he called out, indignation in his voice, so loud a few heads turned towards them – which, the Doctor thought with a gnawing of her teeth, would actually be appropriate.

But people returned to ignoring them soon enough, squeaking and applauding to the loud, outgoing dork that had entertained them throughout the whole ceremony, currently on his knees in front of the shy Wales boy, who was blushing furiously.

Jo Grant, currently on her fifth glass of Gallifreyan Champagne, was giggling uncontrolled.

“So I thought I'd ask, you know,” Jack laughed almost nervously and the sound thundered through the little crowd gathered around them. “We've been together – as in together together for so long now, it's... it's something I want to give a shot.”

“You can't kill him,” the Doctor remarked dryly. “You know that. You tried often enough.”

“It's our wedding! How... how... he planned this! He planned to ruin this for me!”

Ianto had sunken to his knees in tears now, kissing Jack hard, the engagement ring in their hands completely forgotten for a moment.

“Well, you just had to invite him, didn't you?” the Doctor snapped back, in a way that made it perfectly clear she was just as pissed as he was. Here they stood, in their shiny suits, her beautiful, TARDIS blue suit, flowers braided into her hair and guests showing up more or less willingly – And Jack had taken all their attention away with his own stupid, healthy relationship with that Ianto boy.

The Master shot her a wide grin, the annoyance in her mind sweeping over to him and opening quite a lot of doors to new possibilities.

“How about we plot some revenge, dearest?”

She gave him a little side glare.

“We're not torturing Jack, if that's what you mean.”

The Master simply kissed her forehead.

“You know me so well. But no, when it comes to revenge, I pride myself to be a bit more imaginative than that. I thought more of... Well. Let's just congratulate him, shall we?”

“For real?” the Doctor asked, stunned. “That's the last thing on my mind right now.”

The Master smirked.

“Gotta make sure we're being invited to his wedding, love.”

“So, the best times would be...” the Doctor scrolled through three different, chaotic pages in her hands, trying to find what she was looking for in an ocean of notes and scribbles. “Uhm... “

Well, the truth was, even if she could find the best time in her notes again, Gallifreyan biology made conceiving in any way that didn't involve looms.... a little bit of a lottery. Either that or the Doctor simply had no idea because she couldn't remember the last time she had been a woman, let alone wanted to get pregnant. Really, old school pregnancy? Hell no. There was no way to save the universe with a belly as big as a planet.

Currently, however, she was drowning in revenge thoughts and fantasies of out-staging Jack on his own wedding, the Master's own petty cravings raging in her mind, mixing with her own hurt feelings, and it had become impossible to separate them anymore.

Plus, the universe's biggest danger was currently by her side, hands under her shirt and a wide grin plastered onto his face.

“I don't care about the best times,” he muttered smugly into the crook of her neck, his hot breath on the sensitive skin making her shiver. “We'll just do it until it works.”

“I'm just not sure this is a good idea, really.”

“You agreed it was necessary,” the Master hummed, clearly tired of the subject being brought up yet again.

“I agreed it would've been... appropriate to return the favour,” the Doctor replied begrudgingly. “But lying to them and saying I'm pregnant when I'm not?”

“Aw, who cares, they don't need to know,” the Master waved dismissively. “It's not like they'll see you a lot.”

“They'll see me sometimes,” she noted. “And they'll kiiiinda notice the absence of a child, I think.”

The Master frowned. “Are you sure? I mean... have you seen the man's ego? I doubt he'll think about anyone but himself for even a minute.”

“Pot meets kettle,” the Doctor muttered, under her breath, but the Master merely raised an eyebrow, indicating he had understood her perfectly.

“It's charming when I do it,” he sulked.

“It is, it is,” she hastily reassured them. “I just... don't like lying to friends, okay?”

“They're not friends! Friends don't ruin other friends' weddings!”

It was the Doctor's turn to raise her eyebrow at him and he let his shoulders sink slightly in turn.

“Well, my point exactly,” the Master added sullenly. “See? We're not friends!”

“One last try,” the Master pleaded, begged almost, as they sat on the table, looking at food from seven different planets and trying to block out the constant welsh chatting from their right. “We could get pregnant here and now, and wouldn't that be a blow for the stunning couple, hm?”

The Doctor shook her head barely noticeable, her eyes still fixed to Jack and Ianto, who were currently dancing happily unaware of her scorn. They didn't only have everyone's eyes on them and were admired and talked about by the whole crowd, more people had showed up to their wedding, too.

It simply wasn't fair. Just because Jack hadn't married a homicidal mad man and his friends still were alive because his partner hadn't destroyed his whole home planet.

The Master's hand under the table slipped between her legs and the Doctor sighed. They had had sex..... a lot in the last few months. A lot a lot. She wasn't exactly complaining. Her body still reacted to his touch like it had  the very first day, so much in fact, that the heat of her rage mingled with the heat of his proximity and the heat of the honey mead they'd been drinking excessively and suddenly the Doctor's head swam and she couldn't find a single reason to not get pregnant here and now.

The Master grabbed her arm and pulled her to the toilet, neither of them feeling Martha Jones' alerted eyes on them.

“I'm telling you!” she called out. “He just grabbed her and dragged her somewhere, he's doing something to her.”

Jack shook his head gently.

“Martha, they're married, he's not...”

She gave him a very dark look and Jack sighed.

“Okay, yes, he's still... you know... him. And I hate him. And I wouldn't put it past him that this whole “I'm domestic” act is just a plot to painfully murder her. But...”

Martha's gaze became more intense and flatly, Jack asked, “Which direction did they go?”

Sitting on the Master's lap, naked, several body parts disappearing inside the other person, his hand gripping her hair, her head thrown back against the door of the very tight toilet cabin, that wasn't exactly how she had pictured this revenge.

But when Jack, Martha, Ianto and a crowd of their friends had set out to start a desperate search party to find and rescue her, they probably hadn't pictured this, either. Worried, they had ran down the door to the cabin after having heard sounds of pain and moaning from behind.

Yeah. Well. She liked it a bit rough, so what?

The Doctor was still giggling at the thought, actually, that Jack with his one track mind, had, for once, not considered sex to be a possibility.

Jo Jones, meanwhile, was standing in the back, leaning against a wall, shaking with silent laughter and it was clear to everyone that she had come along not out of worry, but simply to enjoy the show.

“Sorry, Jack,” the Doctor said sweetly, as she climbed off the Master's lap and pulled up her trousers again. “Really didn't mean to crash your wedding.”

Jack simply snorted.

“Yeah right. I guess I deserved that.”

“Double, in fact,” the Master gave back, glaring at him darkly, as he stepped out of the toilet cabin behind his wife, fully dressed. “Because now you ruined this for me, too.”

It had done the trick, however, as they both couldn't help but notice with not a small amount of satisfaction. The whole room was suddenly talking about them, the news spreading like a wildfire, while the Doctor and the Master subtly slipped out and made their way back home, whistling.

“You know,” the Master noted after a little while of companionable silence, when they had almost reached their TARDIS. “In a way, I'm glad our original plan didn't work.”

“Yeah?” the Doctor asked, unlocking the door and pushing it open for him to enter. “Why?”

“I don't know,” the Master shrugged, in a way that perfectly signalled to the Doctor that he was merely pretending to be casual. “I think if we ever... you know, had a child.... I wouldn't want Captain Jack Harkness to be the reason.”

The Doctor froze mid-movement and the door snapped shut behind her.

Then she smiled.

“Yeah.”

[celstese]

Gwen cooper gets her groove back

Author: celstese

Rating: teen

Content warnings: Spoilers,swearing,Bilis Manger

Word count: 1511

description: On her hundredth tenth birthday Gwen Williams falls asleep and wakes up knocking Owen Harper off his bed. Being young again is hard. A time travel fix it fic.

(I might continue this later on but this is all I could come up with before I got writers block.)

Ao3

Gwen cooper was ready to go. For far two long for her liking she had been alone. Sure she still had her children as well as good old Andy who lived next to her with his husband Greg to talk to but for her the past twenty years without Rhys was the loneliest she had been in for a very long time. So when on her hundredth tenth birthday she fell asleep Gwen felt ready to die whenever death felt ready to come for her. Sure she heard the story from Jack about what he had seen all the times he had died but figured nothingness was the worst thing to look forward to. For all she knew even Jack's brain couldn't compered what was waiting but she was ready. What she woke to upon waking was unexpected but welcome . She would later realize she wasn't alone but that's not what she jumped to. As she came to she could hear a familiar voice she couldn't place for a while. Then it hit her like a large lorry had crashed into her old wiry body. 

“Owen Harper you utter bastard! ” she jolted up, eyes wide open, knocking him off his large bed with satin sheets. 

“What was that for?” he rubbed his bare face as he sat upright on the wooden floor. 

“Oh my I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to do that.” Gwen felt sheepish as she helped him back up. She quickly explained her reaction.  

“It's just given last I checked you died long before I had my hundredth birthday and I feel so young I'm comfortable blaming the rift. Given the fact I don't remember this so  I have to assume it did since I don't remember that day I woke up really old because of you know work.” “Of course, when is it ever something else? It's always the rift. Bloody torchwood.” he was flabbergasted to say the least judging by his face. 

“If I am mistaken there are some events  I won't let repeat themselves if I have any choice. No child's head should be liquefied for the sake of this planet.” 

“You're serious.”

“Why would i lie to you  about something like that ?I know I haven't been here at torchwood that long  at this point .I don't think I can go back to being who I was at this age. This job opens up a world but not all of it is good. I've woken up screaming more than once. I remember feeling guilt about what we did together and what happened next  but when I left  has been gone from my head for decades. Alzimers can be a  real bitch you know. I could have affected the whole universe by hurting you. I wouldn't be able to tell”

Owen as it turned out probably due to me not caring before had a decent amount of money.  He wasn't the richest person in the world but as I recognized that painting on the wall as an original I knew it was more than I realized. The things we notice as we get older can be odd to say the least of them. But I had forgotten long ago he had a car at his apartment building's car park.. It was in a nice shape but It would have gotten him noticed. It was some sports car in a bright red paint job. I turned to him in other bewilderment. His reply was understandable “I'm having trouble finding a buyer. You would think people would want one but nope i've had no luck for 3 years running.”

We ended up getting a taxi instead.

The commute didn't take as long as it should have been during the time of day but at the time I didn't take notice. Later when I heard from Rhys when I got home from work the significance of that morning. It felt to me that night the butterfly effect was a real phenomenon. It felt like I was that butterfly ; it felt daunting to me.

The plass looked the same as it did in my memory they had kept the old look after the explosion to keep continuity. Plus the other idea would have bankrupted the city. I always wondered what happened to the mayor who was in charge just before I joined. I asked Jack once when I was on vacation  for me and Rhys' anniversary but he looked funny. There was nothing in the torchwood records or any other place.It was like she had vanished into thin air. It didn't learn what happened but I had a feeling he was involved somehow. He was involved in lots of things so it wouldn't have surprised me.

When we entered the hub I was surprised but I didn't know last time. Jack and Ianto were having a date in the hub. It was some pretty nice spaghetti. I wouldn't have been able to eat it because I'm allergic to cilantro. Jack looked like  an owl hooting when he heard what I just told him. He could tell I wasn't joking. Owen's face convinced him something had to have happened even if what he was hearing was only partially truthful. Jack didn't blame Gwen for being hesitant to talk. It was best to keep talking about the possible future on the down low until they figured out what caused this and if she could go back. Gwen didn't think she would stay for long even if she returned. Sure her old body worked but they only lasted so long unlike jack. Jack she thought was unlucky and she wanted to help him if she could. This jack didn't really know her. It felt weird. She couldn't even tell Rhys since he didn't know at this point. It was very frustrating.

I knew if I was around long enough things might change. Then it did.  We had found ourselves at a building site where I remembered. Mary was still alive. It was something I did tonight that caused Tosh to meet her. This as far as I knew was not that important in the grand scheme of things. It was important now . Take care of the body then Mary.

It was late at night and the only one at the bar other than Gwen was the bartender. She found that odd. This was not helping her though. She was still feeling the same as she started. Then as she looked to the left by chance she saw the doors start to open. She tensed up. She didn't want to have anything to do with Bilis. He was still bad news whenever he showed up. He sat down to her and smiled. 

“Maybe you are the great equalizer now Gwen cooper. Things  won't be the same anymore most certainly.” Bilis Manger looked all innocent but she  knew better from her own experience he wasn't what he portrayed himself to be. 

“So it was you who did this.”

“Well not exactly. By going back you can not return this isn't a swapping bodies situation it's a you died and your soul as humans say merged with yours from earlier. Nothing is set in stone anymore except some things. The more things change the more things stay the same and all that.”

She jumped at him and before she could land a hit he was gone. Gwen wondered what happened but this was a whole different thing than she had in mind. Was it right to have kids right now with what she knew could come. She didn't know if those days had to happen. Maybe someone would. She just had to find someone who didn't have a reason to lie to her. She didn't know if she could name hers the same names again. The thought of that was very painful to her when she thought about it. That she would never see Anwen again hurt very much. Gwen Williams was Gwen Cooper once more.

What Rhys had told me had hit my conscious mind in the bathroom. Harriet Jones did not resign today. The ramifications were huge. I shivered on the white toilet. This didn't mean she wouldn't resign next week but there was a chance Jack wouldn't come back looking the way he did the time he left us all by ourselves to protect Cardiff. I didn't really have a smartphone anymore so I couldn't really check the news from in here anymore. There was a chance that a man didn't come here this time . That prospect was preferable to me than the alternative.

The coffee machine had stopped working and Ianto was exhausted. Sure his body was fine but his mind was a different story. It was getting to the point that the first part became untrue soon.

Jack let out a loud gasp. He stumbled and out in a suv came Gwen and Ianto. Being buried in cement was not pleasant in the slightest but it wasn't the worst thing he had ever felt in his one hundred plus years.

[magursa]

url positivity meme !! @fireadapt​ & @kxruyucu​ said: fourrari , aoiidos , legendmade & hebled

@fourrarri​ // REGG, gosh, NEIGHBOUR lol. y’all want me to start with a damn paragraph about how much i love regg. i think we’ve started following each other about a year ago when i was still on josiah and you were on ajay. and honestly, i loved our interaction back then already and now i love it even more !! i love LANCE & his rich bratty attitude, your writing is always so beautiful and well-worded, I ALWAYS look forward to your replies. i love reading them. next to that you’re just an amazing and sweet person, great artist and an amazing friend. ilylots okay xo ♥️ 

@aoiidos​ // NEXT UP. CODEX. we’ve only met like two months ago. but i already have to say you are an amazing person, you’re kind and fun, plus i lovee your writing !! i love ianto, i can see in your writing and the way you talk about him that you love your boy a lot and you should, because he’s great !! we really need to write some more once i get my writing going again because liev and ian need more interaction fjrebfkerb !! iluuuuuu xo

@legendmade​  // JOEY JOEY JOEY. dude, from all the people in this list i know you the longest !! you’re always a gem to see on the dash & ofcourse i still love karter !! what’s not to love, a very out thought character with a lot of fun verses which makes him super versatile !! i’m glad we’re talking again !! ♥️  @ you!

@hebled​ // and last but NOT LEAST AT ALL:: NON. i love you lots. the end. no i’m joking there’s more !! hrebferje even after me having 3040 breaks and making 49480 oc’s you’re always there to support me and i love that so so much <3 you’re an absolute gem !! and not to forget i’d die for beck, he’s such an amazing chracter and i love him to pieces !! fjrefbeekebf you’re the greatest ILUU ♥️  @ the entire squad // YOU GUYS ARE THE GREATEST AND SO SWEET AND SUPPORTING, I REALLY APPRECIATE IT AND I LOVE YOU GUYS TONS XO. DO YOU ALL HAVE ENOUGH YET BC ITS SO CHEESY? LMAO. <3333

[thebeautifulisalwaysbizarre]

I was tagged by @vildeliens thank you Queen (of clowns and headcanoons) ❤️

Pick 5 shows, then answer the following questions, don’t cheat. Tag 10 (or however many) people.  

Oz

Skam France

The Walking Dead

Doctor Who

Torchwood

1. Who is your favourite character in 2? Well that one is easy as hell. Lucas Lallemant, without the shadow of a doubt. I just adore that boy... I really do believe that he’s the most developed character of the whole skam universe. Also, i relate to him so so much, being parisian and 17 and queer and just, globally similar. And that Acting (TM) sure helps (will i ever be over axel’s acting? I dont think so)... I am gonna stop before i write essays (you all think this is a joke but i actually write random stuff about Lucas when i get bored in class, thats how bad it is). I just really love this boy folks...

2. Who is your least favourite character in 1? Well that’s an easy one too. Vernon Schillinger, because he is a neonazi, which is enough. And he is just plain BAD (rapist, murderer, coward, blackmailer... you name it)... And it’s not even a love hate situation, i despise the guy so  much, he makes me wanna crawl off my skin whenever he is on screen. Also i think he’s quite one dimensional which is very weird for that show but yeah. He is The Bad Guy.

3. What is your favourite episode of 4? Well that’s a harder one lmao, because you know, the show has been going on since 1963, which means i have many many favourites... Imma go only with reboot, cause thats the one i know better and i have to say it’s the one i enjoy the most. I think my all time fave is the two parts one, The Empty Child and The Doctor Dances, because those are just so perfect in every aspect imo. But i also love love love the library arc from season 4 (i think lmao) because KUDOS FOR MAKING US INSENSITIVE ABOUT A CHARACTER’S DEATH ONLY FOT IT TO KILL US LATER (and overall the episodes are so so good). Also, because i’m a hoe for big dramatic moments, the episodes with the Master (end of s3 and end of s4 mainly, i dont really like Missy) and the two parts The Stolen Earth/Journey’s end (i remember being so hyped by all of them squading up). Also, it’s not an episode but it deserves its place there: the entire season 6. Because Matt Smith, Karen Gillan, Alex Kingston and Arthur Darvill are just so good. I didnt really enjoy seasons 8 to 10 (even tho i adore Peter Capaldi), but season 7 also has some that i loved (Angels in Manhattan and The Name of the Doctor killed me). And the 50th anniversary. I MEAN THIS IS COMPLICATE I LOVE THIS SHOW SO MUCH IT HAS SO MANY GOOD EPISODES (and it’s the first show i got obsessed with so theres that)

4. What is your favourite season of 5? I think i’ll go with season 2 (?), because i love the og squad and they were all in it in s2, and i think the arcs were done really well (and the last episode, haha, me dead)... S3 and 4 i enjoyed less cause i think the teams didn’t really work without Tosh, Owen and Ianto... I couldn’t really find that magic again (and yes i’m still bitter). 

5. Who is your favourite couple in 3? It’s hard to find ALIVE people to form couples with lmao so i’ll go with one that is in kinda stand-by... it’s complicate...  Rick and Michonne cause i loved how they were best friends first and how their whole story was built... It made a lot of sense to me. Also i love the show less nowadays but i think those are still strong characters (minus Rick now lol)

6. Who is your favourite couple in 2? I had to snort. I know, it’s going to surprise you all, but it’s Manon and Charles OF COURSE. Kidding (pls. break. them. up). It’s Eliott and Lucas (how many of you all are surprised) because. Do i need to explain. Just. Everything. I can’t even put it into words. they’re just a perfect match and so in tune and so in love and i should stop now but i won’t so i’m sorry. I love how they complete each other and understand each other, and i loved how Lucas made Eliott’s dream real (polaris), and i love how they arent perfect yet they learn with each other and they make each other better . I love how cute they look and how in love and how raw. I love the way Lucas’ voice softens when he talks to eliott, and the way eliott’s eyes are so full of wonder. Also the way they fight sometimes but always come back to each other and love stronger. And their ship names literally means “chosen one”, how could I not ship? LISTEN THEY JUST FIT OKAY AND I WONT TAKE ANY CRITICISM

7. What is your favourite episode of 1? oh god i don’t remember them all at all lmao but imma try to come up with one (not 22838 like i normally do). So i’d say 4x11 (revenge is sweet)?? but honestly the show is so continuous that its hard to choose one ep... id say s4 is my favourite hands down though

8. What is your favourite episode of 5? YES THAT I CAN!! it’s from season 1, even though i love s2 better overall, Countrycide. I loved everything about that ep, and it still sends shivers down my spine when i think about it. I particularly enjoyed how it depicted the team’s relationships and how it showed that monsters can be amongst mankind (which, we been knew, but still. it was very well done for a show that fights aliens to fight humans)

9. What is your favourite season of 2? Another easy one! Season 3, as my entire blog can attest. It’s just. A masterpiece. That’s it that’s the post.

10. How long have you watched 1? I bingewatched it in like two months (cause i had to take breaks because school) in 2016. It’s a show that ended around 2000 so it’s not like i HAD to wait, and the episodes aren’t really stand alone so i had to watch them in a row.

11. How did you become interested in 3? I started watching with my dad because he is a cinephile that shows me loads of movies and tv series, then showed it to my mom. And now my dad stopped watching so i watch it with my mom exclusively even though i dont enjoy as much as i used to (still love it though). 

12. Who is your favourite actor in 4? Matt Smith (even though i adored Eccleston, and couldn’t appreciate Tennant’s AMAZINGNESS cause i was too sad to see 9 go aoimjdk). But Matt Smith is the funniest, most Doctor-ish one imo.

13. Which do you prefer, 1, 2, or 5? This is gonna sound like a betrayal to shows i’ve watched for so many years but Skam France, hands down. (i’m obsessed okay)

14. Which show have you seen more episodes of, 1 or 3? 3 because it has more eps and i’m caught up with both, so logically its 3.

15. If you could be anyone from 4, who would you be? Umh i think i’m kinda similar to Clara in some ways (?). Maybe. Like in the way we’re both hopeless romantic in search of an adventurous life. Plus, she is a lgbt+ icon and you can’t convince me otherwise so there’s that. i mean i think i globally identify with companions cause i wanna be them so bad lmao (imagine how cool it would be for my nerdy self ugh). But i look like a Sontaran so. Mayhaps i’d be one of those instead

16. Would a crossover between 3 and 4 work? umh that’d be funny as hell. The Doctor just jumping in a zombie apocalypse. Though i think they’d find a way to stop the apocalypse, so the second show would be annihilated by the first one. Mmh. Interesting still, up for it (i’m up for anything tbh)

17. Pair two characters in 1 who would make an unlikely but strangely okay couple? That’s the hardest one i had to answer GOD. I’d go with the crack ship, Ryan O’Reilly and Miguel Alvarez, tho they would both kill me and then burn my body if they ever saw this

18. Overall, which show has the better storyline, 3 or 5? Weeeelll i think The Walking Dead used to have an amazing storyline (the Governor’s arc was spectacular), but now i’d go with Torchwood cause sometimes (a lot of times), shows that don’t try to make it last for ages tie everything better. And Torchwood did tie things well enough imo (even tho i’m forever sad and bitter)

19. Which has the better theme music, 2 or 4? I don’ think Skam France has a theme music?? more like soundtracks (amazing ones)??? But i mean even if it did Doctor Who would still win cause the themes are fantastic (yes i went there)

This was so fun guys so imma tag @evnisak, @isak-valterssen, @jebentnietalleen, @demauryy, @srodvlv, @takaoparadise, @starcassstic, @thebananaslug, @sleepingthroughmyproblems, @akalousthings and anyone else i forgot, or anyone wanting to do this really

[gmariam321]

I had two really cool fic ideas in the car this morning.  I really want to squeal about them, but then if I ever actually write them, I’ve given it all away!  One I had many moons ago and typed up and I think I shared it with @avaantares. It’s post-Outbreak, which would be tricky since I haven’t actually listened to it. ;) But there was one big issue I couldn’t solve with it, an age-related issue that just didn’t work for me. But hello - time travel! Plus the fix adds so much more drama. But I’m sure there’s much more to be ironed out, since time travel. But it could be cool. And really, really angsty. The other one started as me wondering what might happen if both Jack and Ianto went through the Rift to the past. Or future, I suppose. Usually it’s one or the other, with the opposite in Cardiff looking and waiting for them. Many times Ianto will fall through and meet a past Jack or a future Jack. But what if Jack was with him and they had to make their way in a new time and place? Which is all fine, but then I had a different idea - the more typical Ianto falls through the Rift into the past - and then I put him in a very specific, very angsty year. And then I thought, well, that would create a huge paradox. Which Ianto may try to avoid, although he wouldn’t have known about the paradox. But a different version of Ianto would have known, and would have gone right ahead and blown the timeline sky high, I think. But it would save many, many lives, including his own, so . . . yes, that was my other idea and how it happened. I kind of dig it, but I would need to run it by someone for temporal accuracy. It might not even have to be that long!  So I’m going to go add them to my list. How is it that there are always so many new stories to write about these two characters?? But first I need to finish the three parter I started weeks ago. I just don’t know how it ends, which is always a bit of a problem. :P And funny enough, my WIP - sitting at 7 chapters and at least 15k if not more - is also Rift based. And I really like it. And I have a basic outline, it just keeps stalling out on me.  Maybe because my brain keeps coming up with other ideas! :D

[meta-squash]

Ever since I wrote that character study-type fic of Combat, I've been thinking about Owen's fairly consistent self-destructiveness and also about Jack's reaction to Owen's admission at the end of the episode, about how he didn't want to be saved. I don't know if it was intentional on the part of the writers or not, but I think it's interesting that in this little mini-arc (the three people from the '50s and everyone's reaction after) Jack has only like a week ago had a conversation with a suicidal John and then died by his side in Ianto's car.

Jack (reluctantly) respected John's choice. He didn't do that with Owen. Now, part of that is because he probably didn't even know it was a suicidal act on Owen's part when they entered the warehouse and broke up the weevil fight club. (Although Owen trying to fight off Gwen and snarling "Get off me" at her maybe clued them in.) But I think a big part of it is because Owen has a pretty big, volatile self-destructive streak (which have already had small glimpses of by this point in season 1, and then more later). And I think Jack feels responsible for Owen, almost on a parental level, trying to keep him alive and functioning, even if it is with a tough love approach.

But I do fine it interesting that John asks Jack "don't condemn me to live" and "at least let me go with dignity." I imagine that conversation informs Jack's reaction to Owen saying he didn't want saving.

Jack didn't know John, Jack had no power over John's actions, had no reliable way to comfort him or convince him to act differently. John is, on some level, collateral damage of the Rift and something Jack could not control, even if he feels like it was a failure on his part.

But Jack is Owen's boss (and father figure tbh) and he hand-picked Owen and probably by this time has seen him in various stages and categories of self-destructive tendencies, including drinking himself to death and shagging Suzie. Respecting Owen's choice, letting him die when he wanted to die, would have removed Jack's sense of control again, would have made him feel like a failure again, and it would have been worse because Owen is someone he knows fairly well.

I think Jack also really struggles with admitting when his team is hurting even though he loves them and wants to help them. He constantly vacillates between sympathy and distance, familiar, almost parental comfort and a sort of sociopathic coldness. He loves his team and I think he does want to support and help, but they are all (with the exception of Gwen) very traumatized and fucked up people, and I wonder if sometimes he feels a little helpless when it comes to them.

Or like it's a little too close to home. They only have one lifetime, so they can cry and rage and scream and despair and try to die and make terrible mistakes and all that, and part of why they are able to do so is because they know that one day it will all just end. But Jack has an unfathomable amount of lifetimes; if he let himself break down or freak out or despair or fall apart like they do every time (or even every other time) he was confronted with overwhelming grief or whatever kind of pain he's endured, he'd go mad. Plus, every time one of his team falls apart like that, it's like a spectre of the grief of their own deaths for him.

Jack wants everyone to live because of course he does. He has already endured literal lifetimes of grief and loss, and also the more people he saves, the more he has a feeling of control over the chaos of the world. But it also means that he's not as empathetic to the desires of others. "Don't condemn me to live" is such an intense phrase for Jack to have to hear, since he is literally condemned to live.

As a final aside, I do wonder what a similar conversation would have been like in Dead Man Walking, before they go to embalm Owen. Because at that point, as he says to Gwen, he doesn't want to live the way he is. He came back wrong, different, unable to do all the things that made him feel alive, and also literally unable to feel. It would have been interesting to have that conversation be with Jack instead of Gwen, to see Jack acknowledge that sometimes his need for control does more harm than good, and also to see the difference between living and just existing.

[aeshnacyanea2000]

Fandom Ask Game: 1, 2 and 3?

Oooh, interesting choices! I’m putting my answers under a cut because they are a bit long:

1. The walls of the multiverse are crumbling and random crossovers are happening left and right. Which two characters from different worlds would you like to see meet?

Oh dear, so many possibilities.

Okay, my first, instinctive reaction is Maze from Lucifer (TV) and Ianto Jones from Torchwood. I love the idea of what kind of mischief those two could get up to. Plus, there are interesting parallels between Maze’s relationship with Lucifer and Ianto’s relationship with Jack Harkness.

As for other characters I’d love to see meet:

Maze (Lucifer TV) - Mazikeen Morningstar (Lucifer comics)Maze (Lucifer TV) - Faith Lehane (Buffy the Vampire Slayer)Maze (Lucifer TV) - Angua von Überwald (Discworld)Angua von Überwald (Discworld) - Ruby Lucas/Red Riding Hood (Once Upon A Time)Lucifer Morningstar (Lucifer TV) - Crowley (Good Omens)

Not really a crossover but still two characters I’d love to have seen interact:

Maze (Lucifer TV) - Father Frank Lawrence (Lucifer TV)

2. Pick a show you like and name three changes you’d make if you were writing it (except changes that only affect one or two episodes)

Show: LuciferChanges:

1. Mazifer front and center. Maze and Lucifer are the two main characters, and the central romantic relationship of the show is Maze/Lucifer. That doesn’t mean they are monogamous, though. The two of them have lots of sex with other people, but remain emotionally committed to each other.

2. Chloe Decker is not Lucifer’s love interest, and not his permanent partner in police work. As a matter of fact, he doesn’t become a regular consultant for the LAPD at all. At best, he occasionally helps her with a case and she becomes a friend. More interesting possibility: Chloe starts out annoyed at Lucifer’s disregard for the law and suspicious about his less than legal activities, and she becomes convinced (in an arc spanning at least one, maybe several seasons) that he is some sort of crime Lord (the Sinnerman?). All her attempts to expose him prove futile though, and she slowly spirals into using more and more questionable means, becoming the main human antagonist. (In that case, Lucifer might form a rather antagonistic friendship with Dan and help him out occasionally/semi-regularly. Or maybe, Dan and Maze form an unlikely friendship - due to Maze first becoming friends with Trixie - and that’s how Dan is forced to tolerate Lucifer on a regular basis.) (As a consequence of this change, we get less crime of the week, more supernatural storylines, or cases spanning several episodes. And definitely more of Lucifer’s normal life outside police work, his deals and favors, his involvement in running Lux, stuff like that.)

3. Charlotte Richards is not killed off. Instead, we get to see the relationship between her and Dan develop, and also her struggles with turning her life around and being a better person. Lucifer (and Maze, and Trixie, and maybe Linda and Ella) are more involved in this.

3. Pick one of your ships. How do you imagine them getting together?

I wrote a fic about that. ;-)

But of course I do have a few alternative ideas.

1. Assassination attempt

As King of Hell, Lucifer is used to plots against him and regular assassination attempts. Demons will be demons, after all, treacherous, violent, and with a hatred of all things celestial. So far, he has been able to neutralize all threats with ease. But one evening he is attacked by a black-clad, masked figure in his own private bedroom, and this time he really has to fight for his life. He manages to subdue and unmask his opponent in the end, and is shocked to find that it is a very attractive, young female demon.

Unlike previous failed assassins, she doesn’t beg for her life (or at least a merciful death), staying defiant instead and appearing almost angry that he isn’t killing her.

When he asks her why she hates him so much that she wants to kill him, the demon only snorts derisively and tells him he has an over-inflated ego, and that this isn’t about him. Lucifer is outraged, baffled, and intrigued.

Further questioning - of a demon who clearly believes she will be killed no matter what she says and therefore doesn’t care about anything - reveals that Mazikeen was forced into this assassination attempt by one of the powerful demon dukes, who threatened her with a fate very much worse than death if she didn’t carry it out.

Mazikeen is shocked when Lucifer offers to spare her life and protect her if she swears loyalty to him.

2. Diplomatic envoy

Lucifer has been King of Hell for a while when he is contacted by a messenger from Lilith, the banished first wife of Adam and mother of the Lilim. (Here, Lilim are different from demons (though quite a few of them were fathered by demons).) The Lilim live outside the Garden, in the empty wastelands of the as yet human-free Earth. But now they are under attack from Lucifer’s siblings, who have orders to drive them away or kill them so that the humans can take over.

Lilith wants to open negotiations about an alliance to fight back, or at least asylum in Hell for herself and her children.

Lucifer finds this an interesting diversion and agrees to open negotiations. For that purpose, Lilith sends an envoy who has been empowered by her to speak for the Lilim: her daughter Mazikeen.

Lucifer is immediately fascinated by Maze and more than a little smitten when she proves herself a fearless, cunning negotiator.

(Disclaimer: I haven’t read the Mike Carey comics yet, so I have no idea how close this comes to any storylines in there, but I do know that the Lilim did not originally live in Hell in the comics.)

3. Childhood friends

Angels don’t come into being as fully formed adults, they go through a childhood just like other beings. A young Samael is dared to fly into the blasted realms beyond the Garden by his older brothers. The lands Lilith went to when she was banished, the home of the demons. He’s supposed to bring back something that will prove he was there, something belonging to one of the demons living there.

In an area littered with big and small rocks, he sees a leather bag lying on one flat rock. As he swoops down and picks it up, he is suddenly pelted with rocks by an unseen attacker. One of the sharp-edged projectiles manages to knock out a feather from one of his wings. Samael drops the bag and takes flight to escape the bombardment, but hovers high up in the air, too high for the attacker to see, because he is curios who attacked him, and also because he doesn’t want to leave the feather there. After a long wait, the attacker finally comes out of hiding to reclaim their bag and snatch up the feather.

To Samael’s surprise, it’s a demon child, a bit smaller/younger than he himself. He stops her from running off with his feather, and somehow they end up talking with each other. (Mazikeen is very wary at first, and also clearly has a negative opinion of all angels, calling them celestials as though it’s a curse-word. Samael for his part is fascinated by her, and intensely curious.) In the end, he lets her keep the feather in exchange for her help in getting a truly spectacular proof of him having completed this dare: Maze helps him steal some important artifact from a much more powerful demon. An artifact that was originally stolen from one of Samael’s brothers.

After this, Samael finds himself returning regularly to that spot, and meeting Maze there, and they become friends. Maze is also the one who first calls him Lucifer, after saying that Samael is a stupid name and asking what kind of parent would name their child “poison”.

[theorphaninthetardis]

The Orphan and Her Family Chapter One

*One Week Later*

The last thing Sophie expected was a knock at her front door. She climbs off the couch, setting her tea cup on the end table. Standing at the door, and preparing to knock again, is one Captain Jack Harkness.

"Jack? Why are you here? Not that you can't visit or anything, it's a nice surprise, but why are you here?"

"I need your help."

"Okay?" she says, stepping aside.

The captain enters her flat, and she can't help but feel a little nervous as to what he could need. He makes his way to the sofa, "I heard about your roommate, and I am so, so sorry. I want you to know that I wouldn't bother you if I had another choice."

Sophie forces the thoughts of Morgan from her mind, tentatively taking a seat next to Jack, "What do you need?"

Jack sighs, dropping his head into his hands, "I have this party that I have to go to. I need a plus one, too many unknown variables to go alone. I would ask Ianto, but it's his sister's birthday, and she's already suspicious of him. Gwen and Rhys are out on a date night, and normally that wouldn't bother me, but she's been run ragged for the last two weeks. Tosh is with her family, one of her relatives is on their deathbed, and I can't ask her to miss that."

"What about Owen? Couldn't you take him?"

Jack laughs, resting his head against the wall, "No chance. Not to mention that this is a tough week for Owen. So, will you be my plus one?"

Sophie smirks at him. She knows that this will be a good distraction to keep her mind off of recent events in her life. "After such a charming and thoughtful invitation, how could I refuse."

He smirks over at her, "Thanks, Soph, really. Look, if you need, I can get you a dress for this soiree. It's in a couple hours."

"I should have what I need. You can feel free to use the bathroom to change. Unless, y'know, World War II chic is the dress code."

He smiles, "No, it's black tie, actually."

"Oh, that's too bad. Well, as nice as the great coat looks on you, looks like it's gonna have to be hung up for the night."

*Later that evening*

Jack walks out into the living area of the flat, only to find Sophie standing near the door. Her dress is a modest a-line style, falling just above her knees. The collar is a slight v-neck, and the sleeves are loose, falling to the middle of her forearm. She's putting in hoop earrings when she spots Jack.

"You look lovely," he comments, seeing a pair of heels thrown haphazardly near her feet. He fumbles with his bowtie. Sophie rolls her eyes, walking over to him. She quickly ties the tie, and straightens it.

Turning away, she grabs her heels, quickly slipping them onto her feet, adding a good three inches to her height. "Shall we?" she asks, smiling at him. He immediately links his arm with hers. She grabs her clutch off the sofa, and the duo exit the building. As they make their way to the car park, Sophie asks, "So this party, what exactly is it?"

"It's going to change what it means to be human."

"That's...vague, but sounds like a mystery, with a bit of adventure tossed in." The Captain leads her to a SUV with the name TORCHWOOD stamped to the side. "You're really good at this whole top secret thing, aren't you."

"Oh, shut up." He smirks, opening the passenger door for her, before jogging to the other side.

*Arriving*

Jack parks a block away, and the two walk arm and arm to the party. As they enter Sophie can see Jack surveying the room. "So this is more than just a party."

"I think you had already guessed that?"

"Well, yeah. So, what are we looking for?"

Jack looks back at her, "I'm looking for anything alien. You are going to have fun. Mingle, see if you can't get anything out of the staff. You're sweet, and pretty. Go for the young guys, they'll tell you what they know."

"Oh, I see. I'm the eye candy to weasel information out of people."

He just shakes his hand, flipping open his Vortex Manipulator and making his way down a corridor. She makes her way toward the ball room, seeing men and women mingling about, staff carrying trays with finger food around.

She carefully enters the room, wading through the crowds to the center of the room. There's a large device that Sophie doesn't even try to understand what its purpose is. As she heads for one of the waiters, a very familiar voice can be heard. Her head snaps to the voice, seeing the Doctor clutching a load of nibbles in his hand while talking to Martha, and who she assumes is Martha's sister. She moves away from his eyesight, walking to one of the staff members in the corner.

"Hi," she greets the man. He looks toward her, his eyes lighting up when they meet hers.

"Hello, miss...."

"McCoy, but you can call me Sophie. I was wondering if maybe you could tell me something about what's going to happen tonight. See I was hoping to impress one of my friends by sounding knowledgeable in all of this. They believe I'm some sort of scientist, which I am, but astronomy is unfortunately not as helpful as mechanical engineering. Do you think it might be possible...?" she asks, her hand making its way to the man's bicep.

"William, Sophie. I really shouldn't tell you..."

"Oh, please, it would mean the absolute world to me."

He looks around making sure no one is listening, before leaning toward her, "Professor Lazarus is planning on changing what it means to be human."

"I heard that phrase before, may I ask what exactly it means?"

"I really shouldn't say, but it won't matter soon anyway. Professor Lazarus intends to use that device to de-age himself. I wish I could tell you more, but I'm afraid I don't know how it works."

"That's alright, thank you very much for your help, William. My friends will be very impressed."

She turns to leave, but the man calls after her, "Sophie, may I have your number?"

She smiles at the man, "Ask me again later, and we shall see."

She walks away, only to bump into Jack who is scanning the device, "What have you found?" he asks.

"It seems this Professor intends to use this to reverse the aging process."

Jack, who had been half listening, suddenly spins, dropping his arms at his sides, "What? How?"

"William wasn't sure how it works, unfortunately."

Jack's eyebrows raise, "William, eh?"

She smacks his chest, "Hush, you. Anything alien about this device then? Do you even know what it is?"

He smirks at her, "Sonic micro-field manipulator, other than that, I don't know for sure, but definitely nothing alien. Which is worse, because that means this is pure human bullsh*t."

"And that's the worst type of bullsh*t, isn't it?"

He just gives a light nod, as suddenly people begin to applaud all over the room. Jack turns to see an old man walking into the room, and he grabs Sophie's arm, pulling her back around to the front of the machine.

[this-is-quite-homoerotic]

Fic: I'm holding tight cause it feels alright, my love, when I'm with you

Summary: After a long day at work, Jack and Ianto get to spend a lazy early night in.

Author’s note: I wrote this for the @torchwoodfanfests​ 2020 Bingo Fest, for the prompts ‘cold/warm’ and ‘vegetables’. The fic and my bingo card are under the cut, or if you prefer, you can read it on AO3 here!

This story was betaed by the lovely @moonlightrhosyn​, and the title is from 'When I'm With You' by Eleisha Eagle, an extremely Janto song that I recommend to anyone reading this.

Warnings: None

Word count: 1773

“Hey,” Jack was shaking his shoulder softly to wake him. Ianto groaned in protest. 

“Come on, sleeping beauty. You can go back to sleep after you’ve had something to eat. Don’t think I didn’t notice you skipping lunch.”

Ianto rolled over on the sofa where he’d fallen asleep to stretch himself awake. His spine cracked, and he relaxed back into the comfortable cushions.

“All of us missed lunch,” he protested. Jack was looking down at him with one of those warm smiles that made his eyes look soft, hands on his hips and head tilted as he took in the slightly red mark on Ianto’s cheek where the throw pillow had left an imprint. Ianto hadn’t bothered changing when they got home, he’d just taken off his jacket and his shoes and had gone straight for the sofa to nap while Jack cooked, since Jack had insisted on cooking dinner. 

Ianto had been ready to go to sleep for as long as the rift allowed, but Jack wanted to feed him before they turned in for their well-deserved rest - it had been a long 40 hours - and in order to get Ianto to agree he offered to make him some spaghetti bolognese. Damn that man for exploiting Ianto’s weaknesses. 

“Yes, we did,” Jack agreed as he reached for Ianto, who was still sprawled comfortably on the sofa, wrapped in his cosy black duvet with only his head and feet peeking out. Ianto grabbed the duvet and held it against him so Jack couldn’t pull it back. 

“But there’s no reason for us not to eat now,” Jack cajoled. He tried to pull the duvet gently away but Ianto was holding fast. 

“It’s cold,” Ianto complained, fully aware he sounded petulant. He pouted for good measure. He knew Jack’s weaknesses too, and he was not above using them to get what he wanted.

He could see the hit land when Jack’s face softened further. 

“You can bring your cocoon to the table if you want. Or I can warm you up...”

Jack’s suggestive eyebrows were exaggerated and ridiculous, and Ianto thought it probably said something about him that they ratcheted up his desire to kiss Jack by about 50% - a desire that was always already present in him to some extent these days, by the way. If Jack wasn’t so willing to receive and reciprocate Ianto’s kisses at any time and place, Ianto would bemoan the unfairness of it all. As it was, he really couldn’t complain.

And there was no reason not to indulge himself right now, Ianto thought.

He sat up, letting the duvet fall around him, reached up to grab a handful of Jack’s shirt and pulled on it to get him closer. Jack went with the movement, leaning down to let himself be kissed.

After letting him go, Ianto sighed in mock annoyance. “Fine,” he groused, pretending to be terribly put upon by having to agree to eat Jack’s delicious home-made pasta, which was also his favourite dish. “But I’m getting a sweater first. It really is freezing.”

“It’s not too cold in the kitchen,” Jack told him as Ianto grudgingly pulled the duvet all the way off and got up to go to his room. 

“Might as well change anyway,” Ianto mused, looking down at his rumpled shirt. It was already a mess from the weevil chase the previous night, not to mention their encounter and subsequent fight with the pair of blowfish that morning.

“Alright. I’ll set the table in the meantime. Don’t take too long, the food will get cold.”

Ianto nodded, and went to change.

***

Three and a half minutes later, Ianto walked into the kitchen wearing polar fleece pyjama bottoms, fuzzy slippers, and an old Star Wars t-shirt. He was carrying one of his favourite sweaters in one hand in case Jack had been wrong and the kitchen was cold, but Jack was happy to see he left it on the back of a chair as he sat down. The steam from the pots had warmed up the kitchen when he cooked, making the small room comfortably warm despite the winter chill outside.

“Hmm, that smells amazing,” Ianto commented, making Jack beam. He didn’t have time to cook very often, what with Torchwood being Torchwood, and he didn’t care to put in the work when it was just him anyway. It had been a while since he’d had someone to cook for, and he relished the opportunity.

Plus, Ianto had zero cooking skills or interest in acquiring any, and would happily live off takeaway if Jack let him.

He served them both a generous portion, aware they’d both been too busy to get more than a rushed breakfast and several servings of coffee for the past twelve hours. It wouldn’t matter for Jack, given his regenerative abilities, but he didn’t want Ianto’s immune system to suffer more than was absolutely necessary due to the demands of their job.

Jack saw Ianto made a face as he sat down, and he had to swallow a laugh, knowing exactly what was going to come out of Ianto’s mouth next.

“You put vegetables in my spaghetti bolognese,” Ianto deadpanned. “What is that?” he questioned, picking at the dish with his fork. “Broccoli? Jack, you heathen.”

Jack noticed it didn’t stop him from seasoning his plate or adding several spoonfuls of grated cheese to it.

“You need vegetables for a balanced diet,” Jack said with a grin. It was a topic they’d discussed many times. When it wasn’t Jack bringing it up by telling Ianto he needed them to stay healthy, it was Ianto complaining when Jack cooked for him and used ‘too many vegetables’. At this point it was more an inside joke than an actual complaint, though; Ianto had learned that Jack had the magical ability to make the dreaded vegetables taste good by seasoning them, so he didn’t actually mind. 

“It’s an affront to the dish,” Ianto countered, not meaning it whatsoever.

“Absolutely not, if anything, it elevates it. Besides, I roasted it in butter and garlic with the onions, you’ll like it. Trust me.”

Ianto took a big first bite with no hesitation, belying his complaints. 

He moaned shamelessly, utterly distracting Jack from his own plate for a moment.

“Alright, you were right. This is incredible.”

That made Jack grin again. 

They were too hungry and run-down from running from one crisis to another for the past two days, so they mostly ate in silence after that. 

Jack pondered getting a second serving despite being full, but decided against it. Ianto was drooping in his chair, looking like he might fall asleep over his empty plate, and truth be told Jack was feeling the exhaustion himself, despite his enhanced stamina. 

He sent Ianto to do his night routine and put the leftovers away, taking the time to wash the dishes so they wouldn’t be left in the sink if they got a work emergency and had to leave in a hurry. Who knew how long they might be away if that happened; they often stayed at the Hub when things were busy or if they were on call for the night. Thankfully, Tosh had agreed to be on call that night, diverting the rift alert to her phone in case anything showed up, so they wouldn’t have to be available until the next morning. 

An early night in where he could cook for Ianto and then go to sleep with him in the flat they unofficially shared had sounded divine to him. And it was. It was exactly what they needed to recharge.

Jack walked to the bathroom to find Ianto brushing his teeth with his eyes half-closed. He might fall asleep standing up if he didn’t go to bed soon. His hair was standing up where he’d ran his hand through it and his eyelids were losing the fight with his exhaustion and he looked sleep-soft and rumpled and all Jack wanted to do was walk him to bed and tuck him in, then slip in beside him and hold him through the night.

Jack took his own toothbrush from the glass and brushed his teeth next to him, his arm grazing against Ianto’s as they stood side by side, and Jack couldn’t help the rush of warmth and contentment at the wonderful domesticity of the moment. It had been years since he’d had a moment like this before Ianto. Glancing at the sleepy man on the counter mirror, he realised that possibly, he’d never had a moment like this before Ianto. 

Ianto knew everything about him. Not in the sense of knowing all the details; Jack had lived a long and eventful life, after all, and telling him everything would take more time than they had with their usually full schedule. But he knew all the key elements of what made Jack himself, all the painful secrets he had been forcibly, painfully made aware that he couldn’t trust people with, because they were the kind of thing that would alienate others, making them turn their backs on him, or because then they might be used against him.

(He’d been betrayed so many times.)

(You’d think he’d grow a thicker skin, that the sting of it would dull with time and experience. Not so.)

His thoughts were interrupted by Ianto finishing up and placing a kiss on his shoulder. 

“Come to bed soon,” he slurred sleepily, and just like that all of Jack’s other thoughts were banished, leaving only room for affection for this man.

“I will,” Jack answered after rinsing, and Ianto rewarded his words with a small warm smile before shuffling to the bedroom.

Jack realised he was smiling when he caught sight of his own reflection.

Ianto was already asleep when Jack joined him only a few minutes later. 

He slipped under the covers on what had become his side of the bed, scooting close to feel the warmth Ianto was radiating, and to his surprise Ianto stirred, the two of them rearranging themselves in effortless concert so that Ianto’s chest was pressed flush against Jack’s back, one arm thrown over his side to hold him close against his chest.

Jack felt Ianto’s breath on the back of his neck as he mumbled, “G’night”. Ianto’s feet brushed against his under the covers before stilling again.

“Good night,” Jack said softly, feeling cared for and safe and helplessly in love.

Warm and content as he was in Ianto’s arms, in one of the two beds they’d been sharing for the past several months, it didn’t take long for Jack to doze off.

[blueyesandleatherjacket]

Regenerate Nine Month: Wedding Bells

Volume: 1.

Number of parts: 19/?.

Pairings: Human!Ninth Doctor/Rose Tyler.

Synopsis: "Things got complicated for Rose and Maxence when she decided to get married to Ianto, a man who, according to Maxence, isn’t the right one for her…"

A/N: Ninth month of the year means month of the Ninth Doctor and so I've decided to repost all the one-shots I've written about the him, whether they are DW verse or not to celebrate this fantastic Doctor.

“A hero is somebody who is selfless, who is generous in spirit, who just tries to give back as much as possible and help people. A hero to me is someone who saves people and who really cares.” - Debi Mazar.

WEDDING BELLS:

Today was a particularly important day. However, Maxence needed a few minutes before he could remember why it was so important. He had a huge memory lapse and every time he was trying to remember, he was hitting a big black hole. He rubbed his face to get rid of the last remainders of sleep. It had no effect. He was still in a haze. Plus, he had a terrible headache and his body was incredibly sore. His memories from last night were out of his reach. What had he done to be in such a situation? He sighed, threw his blanket away and sat up on the edge of the bed.

That was a huge mistake. As soon as he was up, the room started to spin and his stomach turned. His first reaction was to run to the toilet to be sick. It was only while he was rinsing his mouth and face that he started to have memories from last night. They were a bit fuzzy but still. It was something. He had gotten drunk, that was for sure. But what for? And why was he naked? He walked back to his bedroom and remarked that everything was upside down. He picked up boxers that were lying around on the floor and pulled it on. What had he done again? If his room was in such a lame state, the rest of the flat probably wasn’t any better. He was messy when he was drunk.

He pulled on sweatpants and went to the kitchen. As he thought, the rest of the flat was as upside down as his bedroom. Pizza boxes, plastic cups and empty bottles of alcohol were covering the ground and the coffee table. It told him one thing: he wasn’t alone last night. He could never have gulped down so much junk food by himself. He must have thrown a party but didn’t remember it. It had happened a lot when he was younger. It was easier to get better after an alcoholic party back then. He had no idea of what was making that day so important but he was sure that he was gonna have a hard time to take the after-party on.

He poured himself a cup of coffee and microwaved it. Maybe it would wake him up a bit. He had to find the motivation to clean his flat and take a shower. He didn’t remember who was there for the party but some help for the cleaning before leaving would have been welcomed. People were okay for the party but not for the cleaning. It was dreadful. Maxence swallowed his coffee slowly while gauging the damages. All that mess would keep him busy for a least a few hours. He swallowed an aspirin with his coffee to get rid of the headache. He waited for some relief and started cleaning.

With a big bin bag, he picked up cups, bottles, cardboard boxes and papers to throw. It was the after-party step the most annoying. At least, that time, he didn’t find any used condom. It had happened once after a party at a brotherhood. Adults obviously had better manners. Or not , Maxence thought while picking up a pair of handcuffs covered with fur. A stripper had come around. He didn’t remember calling one. He had to learn to control his alcohol consumption. It didn’t do him any good. Moreover, he was frustrated not to be able to remember what he had to do today.

When he was done talking around and picking up what needed to, he closed the bin bag, opened the kitchen’s window and threw it in the outside bin three floors below. Then, he vacuumed and washed the floor of the flat. He ventilated and finished his cleaning. When he came in the bathroom, he saw the cover containing his suit hung on the shower booth’s door and remembered the so important thing: Rose’s wedding. Subsequently, new, and still fuzzy, memories from last night washed over his mind. It had been a stag party. That was what they had celebrated by means of excesses.

Maxence suddenly felt torn apart deep inside. He had tried to forget her for so long but she was always coming back to haunt him. Why had she felt the need of inviting him to her wedding? He had come home one day and had found the announcement into his letter box. In a fit of rage, he had taken it to pieces. He had always been impulsive but never violent. He cursed himself for accepting the invitation. He hadn’t planned of going but she had had to come there and ask him personally. He definitely couldn’t say no to her and that was terribly wrong. That girl was making him go crazy.

It wasn’t new. She had made him go crazy since their meeting. His car had collided with hers on a parking lot and had had to make out a report. First, she had called him every name under the sun before she accepted to make it out. He had found it pretty funny. That chit of a girl was insulting and threatening him while he could easily bring her down a peg or two in a few seconds. He had preferred laughing about it than getting angry, which, of course, had infuriated Rose. He had thought she was gonna slap him but she hadn’t and had filled the report. Before leaving, she had promised him that he wouldn’t get away with it so easily. He would hear talk of her.

They had met again a couple days later. She had sat down on a stool in the pub he was working in and had ordered a drink. She hadn’t expected him to pour it to her. She had cursed him again and had thrown the drink in his face. She didn’t know him and yet, she hated him. Once again, he had found it very funny. The fact that he was so calm face to her anger was making her angrier than what was reasonable and Maxence was surprised that she hadn’t hit him yet. He would have loved to see her try, just to see if she was capable of it. Instead, she completely ignored him while he kept smiling.

Although she knew he was working in that pub, she had come back several times. He had become her way to let off steam. Once, she had come looking completely beaten and he had managed to cheer her up. She had stayed until the closing time because he had taken her keys. He had accepted to take her back home when he would be done cleaning and doing a stocktake. It hadn’t gone that way. Giving in to a sudden impulse, she had jumped on him. He hadn’t resisted and had let her do. They had finished the night in the storehouse having wild and uncontrolled sex. It had happened several times after that. They both were filled with a rage they preferred lash out with violent beats instead of letting it burn them. Their meetings were always animated, wild and uncontrollable. Nothing seemed to be able to calm them down except themselves but it was to fear that that rage that was leading them would end up burning them. It had occurred. Maxence had let it burn him. He had thought there was something going on with her but it looked like she wasn’t thinking the same. Two years ago, she had told him that she had met a good guy. She had never wanted to get engaged before Ianto.

After that talk, Maxence had turned the whole storehouse upside down. That had led him to jail. The second time, it had been the hospital. The incidents had continued for weeks and he had been forced to see a specialist to deal with his anger. She had steered him to boxing and kick-boxing lessons. He had laughed in her face when she had told him so but he had to admit that it had done him a lot of good. He had been able to take his life in hand again thanks to his best friend and mentor, Jack Harkness. He had never trained so much than after he received the announcement.

And it was happening all over again. He couldn’t do that, not today. That day was special for her. He couldn’t ruin it. She would never forgive him if she did and he wouldn’t be able to deal with the idea of her being angry with him. He had to control himself. So, he clenched and unclenched his fists while breathing deeply. When he was more or less calm, he took his shower, hoping it would finish to soothe him. It didn’t. His rage was still burning through his veins. He got dressed slowly with steady movements. It was the key of control. A control that was running away from him with every piece of clothes he was pulling on.

His rage was inflating in him like a bubble of chewing-gum. He looked at himself in the mirror. He was half-dressed and drops of water were running on his bare chest. Chest that was rising to the rhythm of his jolting breathing. He was losing his self-control. His fingers were tensing on the edge of the sink. He hated himself when he was like that. He was capable of an incredible violence when such a rage was burning in him. It had never really been the case before, and it certainly wasn’t the right day for a first time. He hated the reflection the mirror was giving him. With no second thought, he punched it. The mirror was smashed to pieces, shattering the reflection of the wild man he was.

The pain took over the adrenalin. The mirror was in pieces and his hand was bleeding. He didn’t care. He even enjoyed the sight of the blood flowing in the sink. It was his rage slowly going away. Now, his reflection was exactly like the man he was: shattered into pieces and red with anger. Could he still go to that stupid ceremony now? Could he break his promise? He didn’t like those two ideas. He knew that it would drive him crazy to see her arm in arm with another man. He still couldn’t accept it.

Repeated knocks on the door made themselves heard. Maxence snapped back to reality and ran his hand through cold water. Then, he wrapped it in a damp towel and walked to the front door. His visitor was growing impatient. Maxence unlocked the door and half-opened it. There was Jack, his mentor, on the doorstep. He had also pulled on his suit and looked terribly uncomfortable in it. Maxence almost smiled at the sight. Almost. Instead, he let him in and closed the door. Jack was pretty angry to have waited so long and was about to say something rude to Maxence he noticed his hand.

“Again?” he exclaimed.

As an answer, Maxence shrugged. It still hurt but it didn’t matter as long as he wasn’t feeling rage or that other pain more unbearable. Jack rolled his eyes and grabbed the first aid kit. Maxence let himself fall on a kitchen’s chair and waited. Jack had fixed him so many times that they couldn’t count them anymore. That one was just the same. When his hand was cleaned and stitched and wrapped in a bandage, the mentor forced him to finish dressing and to talk before even thinking about going outside.

“I don’t want to go.”

“You know, you can still tell her.”

“I won’t ruin her day.”

“That guy isn’t the right one for her. He doesn’t understand her like you do.”

“Who knows?”

“Oh, come on! You’re both filled with that destroying rage. You’re completing each other.”

“That’s not what she thinks.”

“Want my opinion? She’ll end up destroying him and you, you’ll be destroying yourself in your corner because you will have been too stupid to tell her how you feel.”

“Thank you for your so useless honesty.”

“Think what you want.”

The talk stopped there. The two friends left the flat and got into the car. The journey to the chapel was silent. Maxence was watching the landscape through the window, sullen, and Jack didn’t dare bothering him in his deep thoughts. Maxence was pretty unstable today. It was useless to add more pressure on his shoulders. His self-control would be tested enough in the hours to come. It was already hard to tell if he would be able to stay calm all along the ceremony. According to his hand, Jack wouldn’t bet on it. An incident could happen so quickly. Something that was promising to be interesting.

While Jack was speculating upon the good proceedings of the ceremony, Maxence was gathering the bits of his will not to give in to the rage still burning in him. He was keeping it deep inside him and promised himself not to do any scandal. He could do it. He just had to take deep breaths and to stay focused on his calm side. He just had to be there. It didn’t matter if he wasn’t fully following the ceremony. They better not ask him to do more. Thankfully, Jack was with him.

His hangover was still there. His headache too. He was in a lame condition. It was to wonder how he could stand on his feet. And yet! When Jack parked the car on the parking lot, Maxence managed to get out of it and to take a few steps. He was dazzled by the sun, which didn’t help with his headache. There was already people patiently waiting in front of the chapel, happily talking. Maxence frowned. He could go unnoticed but those people were making too much noise for his poor brain. What a brilliant idea to get drunk before a wedding!

Before he could do any damage, Jack led him in the chapel where a few people already were waiting. They both sat down on a bench in the middle to be not too far, but not too close either. If it had only been Maxence’s choice, he would have sat in the back. Or even better, they wouldn’t have come. If it had been so simple! While Jack was observing the surroundings, Maxence frowned even more and lost himself in his thoughts. With his headache, a little nap would be welcomed. It would be funny if he started snoring during the ceremony. Well, funny. She would kill him if he did.

Soon after, the ceremony started. Maxence almost fainted when he saw Rose coming down the alley in her white dress. Even more when she gave him a thankful smile. She was happy to see him there. Him, he hated himself. He hated the penguin prancing about as he watched Rose. He was smiling and crying. It was the first time Maxence ever saw him – in his memories at least – and he hated him. The guy was too plain, too cute, too emotional. He was too perfect. And Maxence was far from being perfect. His rage came back, stronger than ever, and he clenched his fists to the point of digging his nails in his palms to calm himself while Jack was murmuring to him to breathe calmly.

All along the ceremony, he focused on his breathing. It was kind of a meditation. He was only lending a distracted ear to the priest talking. When he was in full control, he managed to doze off. He fell asleep though he didn’t want to. At least, he was calm. Unfortunately, his sleep was bothered by the wedding whose images came into his dream. What a lame friend he was! His jealousy was eating him up and he was sleeping during her wedding. Moreover, he was grumpy because he was dreaming about reality. At least, he had the power of changing everything in the dream. Well, only if he wanted to.

So, he saw himself sat on that same bench, next to Jack, watching a ceremony that was tearing him apart. He looked at the little chit of a girl standing close to the altar. She was smiling from ear to ear and seemed moved. Maxence had never seen her so calm, so relaxed. Was it from the dream or because of her wedding? Was she hiding her rage? How was she doing? Maxence couldn’t take his eyes off of that so beautiful woman. He regretted that she wasn’t his. He would have fulfilled her much better than that guy she was getting married to.

“If any person here can show just and sufficient reason why these two persons may not be joined together in matrimony, let them declare their reasons now or, from this time forward, keep their peace.”

Maxence looked up at the priest and watched him as he was sounding the audience out. He thought that his look stopped on him. Was it just an impression or was he staring at him? Was his subconscious playing tricks on him? Or was it trying to deliver him a message? Could he really react and ruin everything? Could he turn his nightmare into a pleasant dream? Suddenly, it’s Rose’s brown eyes that met his blue ones. She seemed like she was begging him. Probably not to do anything wrong. However, when the priest was about to talk again, Maxence chose to follow his heart instead of his reason and stood up.

“Me. I’m opposed to that wedding.”

Everyone looked at him and murmurs streamed through the rows. He felt embarrassed but didn’t take his words back. On the contrary, he kept his cool and took a few steps, looking at Rose straight in the eyes. She didn’t break the eye contact. Her look was impenetrable. What did she think of that twist in the current situation? Next to her, the future ex-husband was as surprised as mad. Would he stop Maxence from going through with his admission? Murmurs were still spreading through the rows though the priest kept asking everyone to keep quiet. Maxence stopped a few steps away from Rose, still staring at her. When she opened her mouth, everyone shut up.

“Maxence,” she sighed.

“I won’t go back on my decision. I’m opposed to that wedding. The reason is very simple: this guy isn’t the right one for you,” he said, pointing a finger on his rival. “He doesn’t understand you and never will. He doesn’t understand that rage that fills you and pushes you to snap at your surroundings and destroy everything around you. He doesn’t understand this anger continuously burning in your veins. He doesn’t understand your need of liberty and violence, that need of yelling against the world. He will never understand all of this like I do. When we had that accident, I felt it. I felt you were just like me. And I know you’ve felt it too. That is why you’ve cursed me as much as you’ve loved me. Because yes, you did love me, and I’m ready to bet that you still do. We both have that destructive passion that got bigger when our cars collided. I say it all over again: this guy isn’t the right one for you. There’s still that flame burning in me but it’s only anger now. You were the only one to have made it burn with something else. We are two broken people, two puzzles impossible to complete. You know it, we were missing a piece for the puzzle to be complete, and that piece, that’s our meeting, that’s us together. We’ll always be incomplete without that piece and that will destroy us. I hope you’ll realise it someday.”

Maxence stopped talking, breathless, his heart rate off the charts. Everyone was looking at him and a huge silence followed his admission. Then, because of some people’s distorted faces, he understood that it wasn’t a dream. He had thought he had fallen asleep but he hadn’t. There was no dream, nor nightmare. Only reality. When he realised it, he felt his heart drop in his chest. He had done all the contrary of what he had promised himself. He had ruined the wedding of the woman he loved. He had given in to his impulses. Some people got up to applause him but, to avoid the others’ looks, he turned around and ran away.

×

A few hours had passed by when Rose pushed the Ticking Bar ’s door. It was still closed at that moment of the day but she knew how to come in when it wasn’t open. She had always known it from the time she used to come all the time. In the meanwhile, she had changed clothes and pulled a more comfortable outfit. She wasn’t angry. She was even pretty calm for a hot-blooded woman. She was walking with quiet and measured steps to the counter of the pub. It was always strange to see the room so empty. It was giving some charm to that chic place. It made it peaceful. Somewhere everything was possible.

Maxence was standing behind the counter. He was busy drying off glasses and lining them on the shelves behind him. He had also taken the time to change clothes. He had pulled on a black shirt and black jeans that suited him perfectly. It was his work outfit. Rose stopped for a while. She had always loved watching him work. He was focused and careful. His work was probably the only thing he hadn’t screwed up in his life. It had partly helped him to control his rage. He had already been fired because he had turned the storehouse upside down and caused particularly expensive damage but the boss had offered him a deal when he had seen his efforts to control himself.

Maxence loved his work. That was one of the rare things he was really fighting for in order not to lose it. He couldn’t let his chance go away once again. Even if his life was scattered, he would cling to his job. It was a quality Rose admired about him. She had never been able to keep a job. She blew a fuse too quickly. She didn’t have the patience Maxence had. She had never understood how he could stay so calm on the outside when he was boiling on the inside. She had hated him for that. It had changed when she had started to know him better.

And there she was, coming back to him after she had cursed and hated him so much. There was some kind of attraction between them. They had both felt it. Maxence had talked about puzzle pieces and he had been right. She had never really felt complete except when she was with him. Together, they reached the perfect balance. They were completing each other like the Ying and the Yang and preventing the overflowing of their own characters. An overflowing, that was precisely what had happened earlier in the day. Sometimes, the cap of the bottle flew and freed the flow of the outpouring. It was for worse. Or for better.

Rose snapped back to reality and walked to the counter. She sat down on a stool and waited. Maxence continued his routine. When he was done with the glasses, he checked the bottles and went to the storehouse to renew the stock. He was openly ignoring her. It was creating a tension perceptible in the air. The calm before the storm. Who would explode before the other? The diligence Maxence was using while placing the bottles on the shelves meant he was controlling himself. They were playing a dangerous game and they were aware of it. As soon as all the bottles were on the shelves, Maxence grabbed one from under the counter and filled a glass. He made it slide to Rose.

“It’s a bit early for that, don’t you think?” she said in response to the offer.

“Not really.”

He was still avoiding her look and preferred cleaning the counter than facing her. His previous bravery had disappeared into thin air and he was back to the sullen being he had been for a while.

“You’ll be the one in need of a drink.”

“I’m working tonight.”

“Never bothered you before.”

“I like having control on what I do.”

“Like you had it earlier?”

Rose felt him freeze. He gave up his task, threw the tea towel on his shoulder and faced her. He put his hands on the counter and looked at her in the eyes.

“I admit that I climbed down a bit too much.”

“That’s an understatement.”

“But I won’t take any word back.”

“I’m not asking you to.”

There was a little moment of silence. Maxence was surprised by the calm Rose was showing. She was too calm and hadn’t touched her drink. She was only tapping a distracted rhythm on the counter with the tip of her fingers.

“I’m not sure to understand. I’ve just ruined the best day of your life. I was expecting you to come and find me but I didn’t think you would be so calm.”

“You didn’t ruin anything. You’ve played the part you were given perfectly.”

“Excuse me?”

“Sit down. And have a drink.”

“No,” retorted Maxence, getting angry. “I want answers and I want them now!”

Rose sighed and drank the glass in one-shot. She had to tell him the truth and she would have preferred doing it around a drink so he would stay calm. It wasn’t gonna be easy but they had played cat and mouse for too long. It was about time to stop it.

“I wasn’t gonna marry Ianto. It was a frame-up.”

“…”

“It was a fake wedding. We did it only for you to react.”

“We?”

“Jack and I.”

“This just keeps getting better!”

“Most of the people were actors. That’s why they’ve applauded after your admission.”

“And Ianto?”

“Openly gay. Also an actor.”

“Good actor.”

“Maxence, I was trying to make you understand but you’ve never been receptive. It was as it you were refusing to see how I was feeling, what I’m still feeling. I couldn’t go on that way anymore.”

“So, you got away from me.”

Now, his fists were clenched and all his muscles were tensed. He was struggling not to give in to his rage. He was trembling because of it. Suddenly, he turned his back on Rose and walked away from her. She had played with him long enough. He was fed up with it all. He had been humiliated in front of a crowd of actors. They had forced him to confess his feelings during a monstrous masquerade. He was really mad and Rose understood it. Maxence felt her following him while he was walking to the storehouse. He stopped when she talked to him.

“Say something, Maxence.”

“…”

“Please.”

“And what am I supposed to say?” he exploded, facing her. “There’s nothing to say anymore. I already said it all and all you’ve done was mocking me! Did you feel clever creating this whole masquerade? You had what you wanted? There’s nothing to say anymore, Rose!”

“Calm down, please.”

“Calming myself down? You should have thought about it before doing something so stupid!”

His rage was only increasing. He ended up punching the wall with his wounded hand. It made him yell even more; from pain as much as anger. He was becoming a danger from himself and for the others but Rose didn’t step back. She preferred observing him. In that state of uncontrolled rage, she found him handsome. He was wild and dangerous. She only loved him more. So, she threw herself in Maxence’s personal struggle and brutally kissed him. He fought a few seconds before he gave in to the ardour of the kiss. When they broke it, they were both breathless. Rose cupped Maxence’s cheeks.

“Show me, Maxence. I need you to show me.”

Far from having the reaction she was expecting from him, Maxence took her hand and led her to the stage facing the angle of the counter. He made her sit down on a stool, pulled out a lighter and lighted the candle on the piano. He sat down in front of the keyboard then, staring at Rose, he started playing. He had practised a lot for that moment. He wondered if he was dreaming or not. The strength of his emotions proved him he was wide awake.

“A faire pâlir tous les Marquis de Sade, à faire trembler les putains de la rade, à faire crier grâce à tous les échos, à faire trembler les murs de Jéricho, je vais t’aimer. A faire flamber les enfers dans tes yeux, à faire jurer tous les tonnerres de Dieu, à faire dresser tes seins et tous les Saints, à faire prier et supplier nos mains, je vais t’aimer. Je vais t’aimer comme on ne t’a jamais aimée. Je vais t’aimer plus loin que tes rêves ont imaginé. Je vais t’aimer, je vais t’aimer. Je vais t’aimer comme on ne t’a jamais aimée. Je vais t’aimer comme j’aurais tellement aimé être aimé. Je vais t’aimer, je vais t’aimer. A faire vieillir, à faire blanchir la nuit, à faire brûler la lumière jusqu’au jour, à la passion et jusqu’à la folie, je vais t’aimer, je vais t’aimer d’amour. A faire fermer, à faire cerner nos yeux, à faire souffrir à faire mourir nos corps, à faire voler nos âmes aux septièmes cieux, à se croire mort et faire l’amour encore, je vais t’aimer. Je vais t’aimer comme on ne t’a jamais aimée. Je vais t’aimer plus loin que tes rêves ont imaginé. Je vais t’aimer, je vais t’aimer. Je vais t’aimer comme on ne t’a jamais aimée. Je vais t’aimer comme j’aurais tellement aimé être aimé. Je vais t’aimer, je vais t’aimer.”

Lots of emotions went through Rose’s eyes while she listened to him singing. He had learned a French song just for her. She hadn’t expected that. She hadn’t expected him to sing a love song to her in the most romantic language to tell her once again how much he loved her either. She would never have thought that she would love a man like she loved him. She loved him so much it was painful. She wouldn’t be able to be separated from him one more minute.

“It’s the most beautiful declaration of love someone has ever done to me.”

“I’m so relieved you liked it.”

“You’re the one that I want. Now and forever.”

After that statement, she threw herself on him once again to kiss him fiercely. Their flames burned with more intensity than ever that night. The puzzle was finally complete. They were together for better and for worse in the end.

Chronicles of a better man © | 2016 - 2018 | Tous droits réservés.

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In the next shot:

What could he say in this situation? It wasn’t the first time he was coming home totally sore, his muscles refusing to even move. He was taking a warm shower before Rose came back home from work but she had noticed more than once that he was doing more and more sports.

×××

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