#Originally I had this bit in the post itself but then I was like. yea no put this in the tags

[flamingpudding]

I'm so sorry I didn't get to finish but as Dan's Teekl is a Phoenix snake and he takes after Vlad since of dressing

When something big is going on the magical world and they need King Phantom's help he decides to bring along his children this is how the Justice League finds out just like Robin is a past dumb title so is Klarion all the Justice League deal with a bunch of hyper up chaotic children who have been antiheroes let's find out

I wanted this to be just like a we are robbing thing except with Clarion all of them showing off the fact that Teekl have never been a cat would be so funny to me

Anywho I haven't been able to come up with anymore ideas for Dan is Klarion but I did come out with this one hope you find it funny sorry that I messed up on the first part of the writing

Okay... so version one got deleted, per my rant post notices... so here is version two hopes to that it will still be as good... also... i didn't remember how I ended this the first time soooooo yea... sorry again for having messed up in between...

[Link to the first part of the Ask here!]

I hope this will still be as enjoyable....

------------------

Vlad didn't regret a lot of things but he regretted having told Bruce Wayne that he had a way of summoning the Ghost King. Why you ask? Because Bruce Wayne apparently leaked that information to the Justice League.

Well originally Vlad had told Bruce only about this because he was after the deal he had wanted for years with Wayne Enterprise. That man had been able to avoid Vlad for years now, and during his years when he hadn't been a redeemed man it had infuriated him.

But he was a redeemed man now. He had reformed his entire Company and since Wayne Enterprise was contracted with the Justice League, he had felt it was appropriate to boost that his Company had valuable connections too.

He also just wanted to rub it into Brucie Waynes face that he wasn't the only one with big name Hero / other worldly connections department. Okay it might have been a bit of an ego thing left. But he was a redeemed man.

And because he was a redeemed man he had not used his ghost powers to throw Batman out of the window the hero had used to barge into his hotel room at 3 -goddamn- AM only to demand the method on how to summon the ghost king.

No sir, Vlad was a redeemed man, he was nice now, a good guy.

He only grumbled and demanded the reason, which apparently was a demonic thread to the magical world that indirectly could wipe out the entire world itself. Great, little badger will not be amused hearing about that.

Daniel would be cross with him for using the summoning stone in the middle of the night but Batman was giving him a valid reason to use it. Surely Daniel would understand right? Plus Vlad could use that as change to see the little badger again. It had been a while since he last saw him.

Well Vlad regretted agreeing with Batman with the condition that he would be the one to do the summoning. That man in a bat suit did not hesitate to drag Vlad with him then bringing him, blindfolded mind you, to a place where he then was faced with several heroes, including but not limited to the Justice league.

Just great.

At least Vlad got to inform Danial about the situation and the reason for his summon as Ghost King via summoning stone, even if that blond British man had scoffed when he saw Vlad pulling it out, about the situation and what the little badger could expect the moment he stepped out of a portal.

What Vlad did not expect were several RED portals opening and similarly dressed young adults as well as one teen stepping out of them.

"Sup old man! Mom told us you called him about some world ending problem!" Dan greeted him in his Klarion get up, perfectly styled hair and his ghost pet, a phoenix snake, Snape (yes Dan named his pet after a mage from a wizard movie series) on his shoulders. Vlad could feel the distinctive illusion magic around the pet and he was pretty sure everyone without ghost powers were not able to see through it.

"KLARION?!" One of the present heroes yelled.

And of course all of the kids had to answer in reflect turning to where the voice came from at the same time.

"Yea"

There was a brief moment of silence in which Vlad face palmed.

"Ah sorry, that was on reflex. Old habits die hard!" Ellie laughed, she had grown into a young woman and was currently wearing what looked like a black suit crossed with a 90s style witch dress.

"I am the current Klarion, lose that fucking habit already." Dan grumbled annoyed as he crossed his arms glaring at every sibling that had answered to his alias.

"I am telling mom you cussed." Ellie instead grinned instead, before she looked around for a moment before her eyes landed on Nightwing, her face instantly lighting up. "ROBIN! I mean Nightwing! I haven't seen you in ages!"

"Do I know you?" Vlad could feel sorry for the hero, but these where the phantom kids, so he wasn't in the slightest and he was still cross with he heroes for waking him up at 3AM!

"I am hurt! Don't you recognise me!" Ellie gasped and Dan unashamedly elbowed her for acting so familiar.

"Misrule." He warned her. Ellies current Anti-Hero -Chaos Agent- Alias Vlad remembered. A name she specifically chose because it sounded like Miss Rule and she knew that the word play would annoy Nabu. That girl had some serious beef with the Ancient of Order.

"Oh shush little brother! Let me reconnect with the kids I used to mess with!" She shushed Dan ruffling his hair and nearly messing up his horned hairstyle, before turning back to Nightwing. "Don't you remember my lovely Armadillos? Though I only know you were the Robin I first meet because I looked into Grandpa Clock's time mirrors..."

There was a brief moment of silence on the other side where the heroes stood and Vlad swore he could have heard a pin needle drop.

"Oh god..." One of them finally spoke up as apparently some kind of realisation sunk into the heroes. But before Ellie could add anything more the one Vlad recognised as Red Robin cut in.

"Klarion is like Robin!"

"RR what are you...?"

"The title of Klarion got passed down like Robin!"

There was another brief moment of silence before Dan, Ellie and the rest of their siblings burst out laughing.

"It took you idiots this long to see that?!" Dan called them out, laughing as he hugged Snape.

Vlad would probably feel sorry for the entirety of the heroes before him if he wasn't amused by this himself, even he had seen the differences whenever 'Klarion' got passed on.

"For your information, I was the first Klarion, so i could mess with Nabu." Ellie grinned. "I was also the one that used a bit to much eyeliner."

"I never got the the horned hairstyle right."

"I was the one with a fancy black suit."

One by one the phantom kids listed of all the differences in their versions of Klarion until they all looked towards the youngest Dan, the current Klarion.

"What?" He grumbled as his elder siblings grinned at him.

"Fucking fine. I use a suit similar to the old man's style and I like to do more than just mess with Nabitch." He muttered after enduring his siblings stares for.

"And you cuss." Ellie grinned brightly causing the rest of the siblings to to chuckle.

Vlad recognised the look in Dan's eyes and before the kids could break out into an argument or a brawl, depending how violent Dan was feeling, he coughed loudly to get noticed by everyone.

"World threatening situation." He reminded everyone. "Where is your mother? The Ghost King?"

"Oh Mom is already dealing with the situation." Dan shrugged. "We more or less came to watch and see the heroes suck and fail at 'Order' to rub it into Nabitch's face."

Vlad really wanted to scowl the kids and he was going to but then the heroes cut in again.

"Can we get back to the thing about Klarion being a title passed down like Robin? With how many different Klarions did we have to deal with over the years!?"

"Red Robin not the right time..."

"Yes the right time! So many comments from Klarion make sense now! Like the first time he went right up into my face!"

"Red Robin!"

"Oh that was still me! The first Klarion!"

[da-shrimping-station]

What in "Hell" is Bad MC

Emz (short for Emilla)

[ Info under the cut! ]

Some rapid-fire/general facts

21 yo

5'5"

dislikes spicy food and people who complain/whine a lot without doing anything about their problem

her favorite snack is oranges

has once thought about whitening her skin after being bullied but dismissed the thought after a stern talk from Minhyeok

fiercely competitive and has had incidents of being mean in PE class just to win a practice game

is jealous of people with a bigger chest than her regardless of the gender (she thinks her C cups are small)

Your run of the mill Asian daughter who was raised in a strict household. Her parents always voiced their expectations of her, especially in her schooling. She tried hard to uphold those expectations as much as possible.

currently a NEET but earns money from whatever version of OnlyFans they got there

Good grades, doing extracurriculars, doing well in cram school and making sure she beats ass in taekwondo practice. She can be a bit of an overachiever when she sets her mind on things and can be detrimental her more often than not. There's also bouts of her being a people pleaser. Modesty and prudence were hammered into her through her upbringing.

When her parents died, Emz lost all motivation and just dropped everything. Not just because of the incident itself but because she has no one to prove things to. Everything she did was more for her parents that for herself. And now with her parents no longer there, she slowly learns to do things for herself.

Minhyeok has be be her anchor or else she overworks or agree to things she shouldn't even consider in the first place. Emz can be a bit oblivious to people who try to take advantage of her.

Somehow, somewhere along the way, she found that posting pictures of herself online garnered a lot of attention and praise. This eventually turned into Emz posting risque photos. It was a small side hustle that turned into a source of income.

Now she busies herself with making content and buying props and costumes for photoshoots at home. Minhyeok knows what she's doing and sometimes even gets pulled into helping her out. Mostly through asking for his opinion and the occasional bondage themed pictures.

She works had to maintain her figure. Gym 3 times a week and strict skin care routine. She has occasional binging episodes when the stress is too much and gets bummed about it. Minhyeok has to intervene most of the time when she's like that.

Emz is willing to try anything once but has a hard time saying no when her partner is too dominating. She's a bit of a closeted perv and her 'job' lets her meet with people who can satisfy some of her sexual fantasies.

Fun fact! I was originally gonna name her Aerie Lee so her whole name sounds like "airily" cuz canon MC cannot take things seriously n all that 😭 but yea i settled on Emz/Emilla instead

[holymaccaronii]

uh so I forgot which post this was now but you know the one where you were talking about developing the lore and you attached that one eggman meme where he says ,"I miss my wife tails, I miss her a lot" or something like that, and it was said in reference to how AM is in your AU

Is it in reference about AM towards BE or Ellen, Benny, Gorrister, Nimdok and (somewhat because dude got slugged) Ted? I can see it being both because I swear you've joked(?) in some posts about them being spouses, but I can also see it being about those five if he were to see BE's five and miss his.

My pea brain cannot understand which or neither it may be, too much Madcom hyperfixating slaughtered my brain and then IHNMAIMS came along and finished it off

(p.s - is it agreed that Ellison made - or at least had some involvement since he voiced AM - AM so cunty in the game, like the way AM calls Ted sweetheart and baby screams cunty)

Oah an ask I receive about this au :,], I'll gladly answer what I understood was asked! This au is still a wip, thus why I keep mentioning everything as a 'concept' , so thing's may change later.

First off, this AU is based off the ending where both all the original survivors (except Ted as he gets slugged) and the two other allied mastercomputers die. It's basically a continuation of what will happen with the Luna colony and AM in his considerable solitude, BUT with the addition of my Ocs.

The eggman post made reference to a route where AM slowly gets convinced by BE's survivors to reconcile with her, as the story itself is divided into a prologue (that explains the background of the moon colony, how BE escaped to Earth, met AM and eventually kinda had a relationship going on with him before their eventual separation), and the main story (where the humans arrive, this route OR the others happen, each leading to a different ending).

[More yapping below]

AM feels jealous towards BE's survivors because of two reasons: they resemble his just like you said, and they are being treated just like he once was by BE. So AM basically has a mindset of: "oh these humans that look just like the survivors I spent 109 years torturing are living in paradise AND being treated nicely by my ex (that a part of me still loves), how can this hell possibly get worse".

I'm not sure if this explanation was clear enough, as there's SO MANY details I didn't mention for this to make complete sense, but that's the idea the au follows so far.

In conclusion: evil computer fumbles his only possibility of a romantic interest ever, gets replaced by 5 young humans (ALL WITH MOM/DAD ISSUES) that help their new mom get thru grief + are given the chance to live their biggest dreams and be free in return. After a few years the evil computer reaches out to them, n they are given the chance to either help him with his evil plan, help him get his 'wife' back or act against him.

Thanks for coming to my TED talk and thank you for asking :3c. If something still doesn't make sense feel free to ask!!

(Also YEA AM IS DEFO CUNTY AAHHH!!! I know that it may seem like my AM is mischaracterizing the original, but since his program gets corrupted in the au to the point of letting him express love a bit easier, I envisioned him as a cunty, stressed and sassy villain that still holds all his original hate inside ofc. Harlan was so real bc of those lines 😩)

[cleolinda]

Varney the Vampire: Chapter 1

[I originally posted a shorter recap of this chapter on Livejournal, on December 7, 2010. If you'd like to just read the original, less serious version of the recap, that's here.]

[Content note: I'll talk about this a bit later, but, heads up: this opening chapter describes an assault that’s more vivid than I remembered. That's the second half of the recap.]

I'm not actually going to rewrite all my Varney posts like this, but I'd like to talk not just about the way James Malcolm Rymer wrote the chapter, but also the way I recapped it 12+ years ago.

First off, I don't think I gave Rymer enough credit for the atmosphere of the opening; maybe I just appreciate it more after struggling through some of the filler chapters. I did give him some credit, noting that there are 900 words of gothic effectiveness before anything actually happens—I'll quote the very beginning at some length so you can get a feel for what the next 230+ chapters are like:

The solemn tones of an old cathedral clock have announced midnight -- the air is thick and heavy -- a strange, death-like stillness pervades all nature. Like the ominous calm which precedes some more than usually terrific outbreak of the elements, they seem to have paused even in their ordinary fluctuations, to gather a terrific strength for the great effort. A faint peal of thunder now comes from far off. Like a signal gun for the battle of the winds to begin, it appeared to awaken them from their lethargy, and one awful, warring hurricane swept over a whole city, producing more devastation in the four or five minutes it lasted, than would a half century of ordinary phenomena.

It was as if some giant had blown upon some toy town, and scattered many of the buildings before the hot blast of his terrific breath; for as suddenly as that blast of wind had come did it cease, and all was as still and calm as before.

Sleepers awakened, and thought that what they had heard must be the confused chimera of a dream. They trembled and turned to sleep again.

I summarized this as:

The lightning! The thunder! Ominous calm! The buildings scatter like toy houses! O THE STORMY STORMINESS OF THE STORM. And then the hail starts up, at which point I started laughing, because… hail. Sexy, sexy, stormy hail. Oh the hailiness of the hail, the stormy sexy chunks of ice hailing on your head, yea, unto a mild concussion. In conclusion: hail.

I had some interesting expectations here about gothic atmosphere, or perhaps just the vampire genre itself, necessarily being "sexy." You do see some eroticism in a vampire story like "La Morte amoreuse" (1836), but—remember how I mentioned the cottage industry built on Polidori's "The Vampyre," which ultimately results in Varney the Vampire as a sort of parody? There's no Erotic Biting in any of that. Biting of any nature happens off-page in "The Vampyre," and to my knowledge, Ruthven doesn't manage to bite anyone in spinoffs like The Bride of the Isles. At the time Varney was first published (1845-1847), I don't know if people were expecting scenes like—well, what's about to happen next.

Enter Flora:

And now we meet Our Heroine, Flora Bannerworth, an aptly-named maiden who is "young and beautiful as a spring morning," bare shoulder, sculpted ivory bosom, teeth of pearl, moaning in her sleep, a flood of loosed tresses, so on and so forth. Wind, rain, sexy hail, 600 words, FLASH OF LIGHTNING! SHRIEK!

Okay, I clearly expected the heroine to be eroticized, and I was at least right about that:

The bed in that old chamber is occupied. A creature formed in all fashions of loveliness lies in a half sleep upon that ancient couch -- a girl young and beautiful as a spring morning. Her long hair has escaped from its confinement and streams over the blackened coverings of the bedstead; she has been restless in her sleep, for the clothing of the bed is in much confusion. One arm is over her head, the other hangs nearly off the side of the bed near to which she lies. A neck and bosom that would have formed a study for the rarest sculptor that ever Providence gave genius to, were half disclosed. [...]

Oh, what a world of witchery was in that mouth, slightly parted, and exhibiting within the pearly teeth that glistened even in the faint light that came from that bay window. How sweetly the long silken eyelashes lay upon the cheek. Now she moves, and one shoulder is entirely visible -- whiter, fairer than the spotless clothing of the bed on which she lies, is the smooth skin of that fair creature, just budding into womanhood, and in that transition state which presents to us all the charms of the girl -- almost of the child, with the more matured beauty and gentleness of advancing years.

Y'all.

I had read a lot of Victorian literature by 2010—took graduate classes, even—and was too jaded to be as fazed by this quasi-Lolita mess as I maybe should have been. I remember reading this and thinking, "Yeah, that's standard. Goes on a bit, though."

Having established Flora Bannerworth, Victorian Lolita (she's the only person with any sense for several chapters, don't hold it against her), the story starts to ramp up. Flora sees "a figure tall and gaunt, endeavouring from the outside to unclasp the window" in the next flash of lightning. She's not sure what she really saw; it turns out that the literary point of the hail is that she can't tell if the sound she's hearing is ice raining down on her gothic mansion or vampire fingernails trying to claw the window open. And like, who thinks "Obviously, a vampire is trying to get in"? She saw it so clearly, and yet, storm, darkness, hail, she could just as easily explain it away—how did Ann Radcliffe differentiate terror from horror? Basically, terror is the dreadful lead-up and horror is the shocking revelation? So we switch here from the horror of OH SHIT VAMPIRE AT THE WINDOW back to the dread of waiting to find out what it really was.

Around this point in the original post, I pointed out that there are four elements you might see in a vampire story: the Appearance of the Vampire; the Attack of the Vampire; the Victim's Consumptive Suffering; and the eventual Destruction of the Vampire. You see these pretty reliably in Dracula, for example; you see them subverted in Interview with the Vampire, where the vampire is eventually destroyed by fellow vampires, but then it turns out he wasn't, and he goes on to be vampire king and see Jesus and mess around with the Devil and Atlantis is involved, idk I didn't keep up with those books after the one with the body-thieving. In this particular chapter of Varney, we get the first two elements, and they are honestly very effective: "Frozen with horror!" I said. "Heart beating wildly! The strange reddish light from a burning mill in the distance! The vampyre's nails clattering against the glass as it seeks to open the latch! She tries to scream but cannot to move, but cannot! Her cries for help are but hoarse whispers that no one can hear!" And then:

(I want you to remember Lord Ruthven's "dead grey eyes" here:)

The figure turns half round, and the light falls upon its face. It is perfectly white perfectly bloodless. The eyes look like polished tin; the lips are drawn back, and the principal feature next to those dreadful eyes is the teeth the fearful looking teeth projecting like those of some wild animal, hideously, glaringly white, and fang-like.

(Sidebar: This is apparently the first appearance of the word "fang" in vampire literature.)

It approaches the bed with a strange, gliding movement. It clashes together the long nails that literally appear to hang from the finger ends. No sound comes from its lips. [...] The glance of a serpent could not have produced a greater effect upon her than did the fixed gaze of those awful, metallic-looking eyes that were bent down on her face. Crouching down so that the gigantic height was lost, and the horrible, protruding white face was the most prominent object, came on the figure. What was it? what did it want there? what made it look so hideous so unlike an inhabitant of the earth, and yet be on it?

Here I am, making a very good point while being gleefully insensitive:

Panting, repulsion, heaving bosoms, etc. And then begins the slow agony of Flora oozing across the bed in her attempt to escape. Hair streaming (slowly) across the pillows, covers dragging (slowly) behind her, until she gets one foot (slowly) onto the floor. This is one of the few times the paid-per-word aspect works in Varney's favor—it has the endless creep of a nightmare, so let's take a moment to bask in a brief ray of quality. Undaunted by effective writing, the vampyre reaches her and drags her by the hair back onto the bed; "Heaven granted her then power" to scream her head off. And thus follows the most awesome sentence I have yet seen in gothic literature:

With a plunge he seizes her neck in his fang-like teeth a gush of blood, and a hideous sucking noise follows. The girl has swooned, and the vampyre is at his hideous repast!

My Hideous Repast is totally the name of my new goth band.

And that was the end of my commentary on the chapter.

I'm torn here because I do think the writing in general is entertainingly overblown, and I do think "my hideous repast" is funny in the abstract. But what I don't understand—not to bring the room down, but I feel like it should be pointed out: when I started recapping Varney the Vampire back in 2010, I completely missed the fact that this opening scene is describing a sexual(ized) assault. Some readers might be really, really uncomfortable with this scene. Why did I not see this?

I came here to have fun and that would not have been fun?

I was approaching the serial from the assumption that it's silly and melodramatic, so anything that happened also would be?

This cover illustration did not exactly set me up to take it seriously?

I was so used to the ravishment fantasies of gothic/vampire media that it didn't strike me as something unpleasant or unusual to read?

It was 2010 and we didn't necessarily question problematic angles as thoroughly as we do now, even though I was already critiquing Twilight in 2008 so that's kind of a bullshit excuse?

I still think the melodramatic writing is pretty funny in places and I'm not sure how I feel about myself for that?

I think at least some of my reaction actually does come from writing about Twilight from 2008 onwards. It was a vampire story that had a marked lack of Erotic Biting scenes, to the point where director Catherine Hardwicke had to add one to the movie: Bella's fainting-couch fantasy of Edward as a classically gothic vampire, which apparently involves shoe-polish hair.

The mood 15 years ago (!) was, some people loved a twinkling repressed sparklepire insisting he mustn't touch his high-school ladylove, he mustn't! but he must!!, and other people were big mad about it. Reading Varney, it felt refreshing to go back to a "traditional" story and say, see, there is bloodshed and it's not sparklewashed and tame, that is what real vampiring looks like. And somewhere along the way, I think I lost sight of the fact that Twilight, for all its many faults, at least involves someone who enthusiastically consents to being bitten. Like, Bella as would-be victim consents when Edward doesn't; the big tension of the series is that Bella is always throwing herself at a hungry vampire who keeps running away from her.

Hey, you might say, in the midst of a cultural moment when everyone’s going wild over the bizarrely chaste story of a teenage girl and her guilt-ridden goody-two-shoes vampire boyfriend,

remember when vampires were actually scary and forced themselves on their victims?

wait what do you mean that's not great

By “not great,” I don’t mean that vampire villains are Problematic™ and should be banned from fiction. I'm saying, that's the point, that it's villainous to force a vampire bite on someone; that's what the horror of the situation is about. That said, one of the unique holds that vampires have on audiences is the moment when “force” becomes ambiguous—ambiguous for the characters, but when we consent, as readers and viewers, to seek out that ambiguity. Like, I’m here for vampires because of that, the psychodrama is the whole point for me; it’s not because I like watching people get chewed on. That ambiguity holds an audience-proxy tension between “I don’t want this” and “but I do want this.”

Case in point, Dracula attacking Mina in the original text: Mina is horrified to find that she’s compelled to submit despite herself (“strangely enough, I did not want to hinder him”), although that scene is heavily weighted towards “I don’t want this”—towards horror. A story like “Carmilla” has Laura feeling confused, conflicted, unsure of what’s even been happening behind the veil of her dreams: Do I want this? What am I even wanting? “Whatever it might be, my soul acquiesced in it”: more of a balance between want and not-want. Whereas Bella immediately wants to be bitten, end of, and spends three books chasing a vampire who is agog at how little she cares for her own life. It's... some kind of tension, for sure.

Thousands of words have been written about how this tension is tied to societal sexual repression, of course. And as the decades went on, as sexual mores loosened throughout the twentieth century and beyond, writers and filmmakers started saying, “Oh, the vampire’s bite is enjoyable and it doesn’t turn you immediately into a vampire, have fun.” (The U.S. seems to be moving politically back towards repression, which makes me wonder how vampire media might change soon.) And this is why Twilight feels like a metaphor for literal chastity: there are immediate consequences for being so much as nicked by a fang, and so all the eroticism is dialed down to teenage makeouts.

And so, in 2010, I was so busy enjoying the literary contrast between Twilight and a book where vampires actually bite people that I lost sight of the fact that what happens to Flora is a particularly cruel and vivid assault. I mean, getting dragged by her hair, Jesus Christ, why was I not more disturbed by that?

What this then makes me ask, though, is how did readers in 1847 take this?

Who was this written for?

Readers who would identify most with Varney—attacking Flora, which is awful, but the action as written is extremely callous?

Readers who would identify most with Flora—being attacked, which suggests a "horror is a safe roller coaster" framing?

Readers who wouldn't really identify with either of them, but instead might picture it as a stage play?

Given that Polidori's Lord Ruthven set off a "vampire craze" onstage, I lean towards the third option. It takes a certain bystander detachment to read this scene and not think of its reality—to empathize—at all. And my "lmao this is so silly" is, in fact, a form of detachment. But all three of those options are possible, all at once.

So: is this opening chapter intended to be funny? (Subsequent chapters are far more intentionally humorous, and I had doubled back to recap this after reading ahead.) Are we meant to laugh, or is the outdated style only unintentionally funny now?

Is it satirizing earlier vampire literature/theater on purpose?

Is humor a way of making it easier to read a scene like this?

Is it not a good thing, really to make a scene of assault "easier to read"?

Did I, a reader who would identify with Flora, need it to be easier to read?

Is it okay to have multiple, conflicting reactions to something?

The only answer I have is "Yes," to that last question. And the only thing I know to do with conflicting feelings about media is to accept them and say, as a data point: here they are. There’s a level to this first chapter that I completely did not grasp 12-13 years ago, when I was 30+ entire years old, and I'm still not sure why that is.

I do think Varney the Vampire is frequently pretty funny; weirdly, the subsequent chapters read like a parody of Dracula if everyone in Dracula except one (1) heroine was completely useless, 50 years before that book was even written. Flora might be the victim in this chapter, but she is not the butt of the jokes. But I guess what we need to think about is—if this book is meant to be parody, why is it funny, who is it making fun of at any given point, and what purpose does that serve?

At this point, the antiquated style is what’s funny to me, and I’m making fun of Rymer. Did Rymer intend his readers to find the opening chapter funny? Maybe not: I think he intended it, certainly, to be titillating, even exploitative—and I was aware of that, but maybe not enough.

We'll resume with Varney trying to get over a garden wall. It will be a shorter, lighter post.

[nt-studios]

Jam is over... so, now what?

Welp, the eighth Strawberry Jam has officially come to an end. Because of this, I wanna take a brief moment to share what I've learned the past month-and-a-half and my future plans up to this point...

As you may recall from my previous post, I made the choice to pause production on my current project to enter in this year's jam. I did this because I thought it'd be the perfect opportunity for me to take a small break from working on the same game I've been putting all of my attention towards for the past year now, and instead explore newer ideas that I've been wanting to tap into for a while.

I knew ahead of time that with a full-time job outside of game dev, this was gonna be a struggle. I would have to find the right amount of wiggle room within my busy day-to-day schedule to work on a fresh project under a tight deadline. And welp... the results kinda spoke for themselves. I ended up with an untested, unstable, nearly unplayable game by the time submissions closed. No matter how many bug fixes I tried to make postmortem, the game's concept just didn't work.

I'm gonna be completely frank here... this made me really upset the last couple of weeks. It completely shattered my confidence as a game dev and I nearly scrubbed my submission from the judging panel because I wasn't happy with what I made. But ultimately, I had to remind myself of just how much time and effort I put into this thing already. It would just make me feel worse thinking I did all this work for nothing.

All in all, though, this experience has made me understand my limitations a bit more. I felt trapped in my current project, like Mornin' Firebreather was the only thing I was meant to work on and nothing else. I was starting to feel a bit fatigued, so I used this opportunity as an excuse to break out of this cycle I've created for myself. But now I know that relying on a timed game jam to scratch this itch I've been having wasn't the right approach.

So now, what does this mean for the future of my game dev journey? The jam is over, so what're the next steps from here? Well... now I have a second project under my belt. Despite its flaws, the story is still something I'm quite proud of and honestly one I can't discard just because the game itself is crap. Therefore, I'm gonna be taking additional time to do some serious maintenance on The Makeup Exam (*without* a time constraint). I'll keep the original jam version up until maybe the end of this coming weekend, but then I'll remove it from itch and eventually do a re-release with an actual, playable product.

With that being said, I'm also gonna turn this Tumblr blog into a general game dev one, where I'll be posting devlogs and updates for ALL of my games instead of just Mornin' Firebreather. Now, this doesn't mean that I'm quitting production on Mornin' Firebreather. I still have big plans for that game that I haven't forgotten about 😜

But yea... that's pretty much it. I know this update was a little longer than usual, just had a lot going through my mind as of late.

[that-wizard-oki]

Y’know, I think one of the key tone differences between Wizard & Pirate respectively is that The Wizard is NOT born of the spiral, and the Pirate VERYYYY much is a product of this world, right down to establishing canon parents and several other aspects of that character’s backstory. 

I think this is a very smart choice in terms of setting Pirate apart from Wizard- while yea you want the two to still feel like they take place in the same universe, I think having that distinct difference in player origin helps to establish Pirate as it’s own respectable, stand alone game rather than just living in Wizard's shadow. 

And OH BOY, is it ever so good! I haven’t played in awhile and I'm not nearly as familiar with the material as Wizard’s, but one of the things I like so much about Pirate is that it feels so much more grounded in what it is. I know ‘s it’s a pirate’s story- it’s a bit more mean, a bit more rough, a bit more ‘violent’ while still keeping things pg, and it really just makes me respect the hell out of it. 

Especially in it’s current state of being, I think Wizard can feel very overwhelming, especially post arc 2 when a lot of the story begins to focus on a more nuanced story and characters- In pirate, at least of what I remember, you obviously go on these large scale adventures, but you aren’t ever like, provoking the creation gods of all existence and discover you’re like this tear in the matrix sorta deal- no, you’re some kid orphan with a band of misfits trying to take this goddamn robot army down and avenge your parents/find that damn treasure. It’s a lot more straightforward, and a lot more digestible I think to people who might be picking up the game out of nowhere for the first time. 

This is to say, Wizard lives a bit more with it’s head in the stars (not in a bad way, just it’s vibe is a bit more magical in nature of course), where as Pirate’s got it’s feet planted firmly on the ground. You’re in the gutters, you’ve got mud on your boots, you’ve been in prison.

Early Wizard definitely had it’s grittier & grounded moments, but I do think Pirate does a very good job at keeping itself grounded in a more concrete sense- y’know, for as wacky and silly as the Spiral can be at times. 

Anyway. Love both these games with my whole heart <3

[kurp-stuff]

Just posting some thoughts about the dead/po/ol and wol/ve/rine movie (i was gonna tag a post but it became too long and unrelated to the actual post which was about byebyebye nsync). It's not gonna be organized, maybe i'll organize them later whatever.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

i thought the movie was barely a movie rather a succession of cameos references and fight scenes. It felt really empty or shallow to me. (really makes you understand why in english film and movie are different terms tbh). And seeing people say it's a very good movie has me losing my mind fr

Not that i had a BAD time either. I got all the references since im a big stinky nerd. And i have a fascination for bad 00s superhero movies. They're delicious garbage to me. So I was amused by he cameos.

But GOD please im begin people to actually watch movies other than marvel ones

I say that as someone who started their cinematography classes almost only with those as a reference. And i was a bit snobbed by my cinemato professor so my point is not to be a snob. like yes sometimes it's fun I understand.

tho i wouldnt rewatch almost any mcu movie for pleasure. I still very much enjoy the guardians of the galaxy trilogy for example. But that's because they're literally better than the other mcu movie sorry i dont make the rules hihi. And x-men first class is one of my fav movie let's be real.

So yea sometimes it's fun but when it's monopolizing the industry and honestly harming it ....There should be less of those amusement park movies. Yessss ok im aligning with scorcese sorryyyy. Sorry im an old fart 😔.

And i know cinema started as a curiosity showcased in fairs and huh circus/carnivals etc. But that's also because it was new.

Anyway again not saying this as a snob like im better than you or whatever. I regurlarly watch disney channel original movies like they're the best things ive ever seen. So im not here for denying you your fun. Im here to tell you YOU DESERVE BETTER.

Now back on the movie itself : the music was nice. But can you go wrong with classic madonna and corny 00s boys band songs and grease ?

tbf i think the 1st deadpool movie is more crappy than funny and i liked the 2nd one. It had some funnies in it (and again big stinky nerd so i knew the new characters (mostly) and was happy to see them) But GOD is that humour 12 yo boy on 9gag in 2011. most of it at least. And fart jokes make me joke most of the time so you can imagine if im tired by the movie's humour. Like I love the Austin powers movie and im still saying that. (idk im trying to find examples of movies with crass humour tho it's not exactly the same kind of humour. And not all jokes make me laugh in Austin powers to be clear)

Weird villain choice for a movie which is at best anecdotic (do you say that in english ?). I used to read x-men comics with her in it cause my dad had them. But didnt understand shit cause i was literally 8. But she seemeed way to important and scary to be a deadpool movie variant villain ???? Feels like wasted potential.

Idk if it's skill issue from me but trying to sum up the movie to a friend was a hard task. And idk if it's because the movie is actually well very empty so when talking about it i immediatly talked about the cameos and references rather than the plot. Tho the overall plot is not that complicated, it's just not solid enough and nothing in the narration and filming helps (sorry lacking some cinematography terms in english)

The middle part is so long and mostly boring (except for the cameos) that i forgot what they were doing there at some point. Also very much my opinion, and i think the same for the 3 deadpool movies, but the humour really prevents me for caring about anything happening. Also love Wade saying he wants to save his timeline because his whole world is like 5 people that live in it. But we only see those people like 5 minutes, 10 minutes tops.

Also idk but i feel like this movie would be an ordeal to watch for someone who isnt temrinally ill with mcu disease and hasnt watched every single piece of mcu shit there is before watching this movie. (i mean I did ...watch almost everything...sooo uugh). Like this was another problem I had telling the story to my friend. She has watched A LOT of mcu and has been a big fan of it until like maybe 2 years ago when doctor strange mom came out (which was terrible you guys are insane for thinking this movie is good. twas a bit funny tho. but not comically bad enough for me to call it delicious garbage. I was a bit desappointed but i had expectations for billy and tommy lmao. I'll rewatch it one day). And she hasnt watched any mcu shows. NOW TO EXPLAIN THE TVA. Okay I simplified by saying they're a time patrol that "controls" and watch over all the timelines or something like that. But geeze. And if you havent watched all or some the old fow superhero movies, the cameos are meaningless to you (not my case I wish the human torch had stayed longer. I was obsessed with the fantastic 4 movie as a kid. delicious delicious garbage. My second obsession was the daredevil 2003 movie. I would have died if they'd manage to get Ben Affleck for this shit).

Like a youtuber I follow said, it's probably gonna become less enjoyable with each rewatch, like no way home (which i thought was very mediocre even when i 1st saw it with friends and was the only old killjoy saying it wasnt the masterpiece they said it was). Let's be real apart from the other spider-man participation, the movie is boring. And stupid. Mcu Steven Strange is a stupid old fuck and deserved to be demoted :) . And even the cameo moments have little pauses after made specially for cinema cheering. UUUGUHHGHGH. Like apart from that the movie is not solid enough for it to stay the same fun everytime we watch it. And the cinematography is like absent i believe. SOOOO YEAAA.

Oh yeah the joke about Hugh Jackman being forced to play wolverine until he's 90 and then the same week anouncing robert downey jr returning to the mcu as dr doom 💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀

Anyway

Superheroe movies can be good and CINEMA, not just entertainment (i do believe cinema should also be entertaining actually BUT you get me). That's why Im annoyed at those movies. Like Of course I do believe a vast majority of comic books adaptations should be animated movies or shows. Like literally the best superhero movies are the incredibles and into the spiderverse. Undebatable. Then there's like The batman 2022 which is the only live action superhero movie i thought was good good. Oh yea and 2 or 3 x-men movies are nice I love them Im an x-men stan when xmen is good. (huh yes im a nolan batman trilogy hater, i fucking hate them, find them boring as hell and dull and fail to see how they are cinematographically interesting. Also responsable for bad opinions about batman since 2005. Doesnt feel anything like batman, like honeslty could just change the characters' name that's how much they dont feel like themselves. Feels like Nolan doesnt like batman, is ashamed of doing a batman/superhero movie. Realism my ass. Artistic direction I HAAAATE. I'll try watching it again sometime cause im desperatly trying to understand what people like in these movies)

Anyway that's it for now after this digression. If anyone read all that and wanna talk about it Im open.

[jimclassicstoycollection]

Transformers

Masterpiece 36+

Megatron

by Takara (2018)

I got Masterpiece Megatron for my birthday...back in May 2020. Yea, I’m a little late on this one, but to be honest, I’ve been holding off on opening this up for two reasons: One, I hear the transformation is a beast, and I just haven’t been mentally prepared for it, and TWO: I felt like this needed to be an event before I could remove it from the box...as if my 40th birthday wasn’t an event enough.

But regardless I’m finally doing it now, and let this be my return to routine posting again after a looooong hiatus..

Box:

The MP boxes are usually simply a matte black box with the figure prominently displayed and this is really no different.

It’s a simple, elegant box showing off the figure trapped within.

Collector’s Card:

Like all MPs Megatron comes with a collector’s card with a him stand a pose similar to his old G1 baox art and stats on the back which I cannot read. The card quality is decent with a decent gloss.

Collector’s coin:

MP-36+ came with a collector’s coin sealed in within a plastic bubble on a really nice card made up to look like Megatron’s chest.

I’d hate to tear it apart, so I’ve decided to leave it on the card.

Robot Mode:

MP-36+ is a retool of MP-36 meant to be less cartoon accurate and more like his G1 toy which is the main reason why I wanted to check this figure out instead of the getting the base MP-36.

Not owning the original G1 Megatron toy until my 21st birthday this (the OG G1 toy) was always fascinating for me; I remember staring and studying the old Transformers toy pamphlet and wanting it as a kid. 

Right out of the box MP-36+ is an impressive figure; that chrome silver is so good, and a lot of the color detail and tampograph looks straight out of the G1 toy.

The head sculpt has that cold, and cruel stare, and the curly-Q on the chest is a great touch.

Megatron’s joints are mainly soft ratchets and he can hold a pose well.

Well he passes the high-kick pose, so that’s a bonus!

Transformation:

In order to properly transform MP Megatron, I watched one of Emgo’s videos out of fear that I was going to break it.

Transforming this figure is definitely a challenge, and especially when you consider that chrome paint can eventually wear off if you touch it too often, so I was very hesitant to touch it, yet alone alter its shape.

I’m fairly certain the chrome paint adds an extra layer to the toy, because I was occasionally having difficulty getting certain parts of the gun mode to snap into place. [See below]

Naturally every time a piece did snap into place I flinched a bit, fearing that I was going to chip away at the chrome.

(below) Part of the Megatron’s transformation process is to collapse his shins by folding panels, and sort of accordion-ing each leg in on itself.

Well, it’s easier to transform the legs into gun mode than it is to turn him back into robot mode. Un-accordion-ing those legs back into lode-bearing status was not an easy process. I had to resort to metal picks to un-wedge things, and I was afraid that I was going to break the figure. I didn’t, but it was a task, to put it mildly...

Gun Mode:

Megatron’s weapon mode is a Walther P-38 with a silencer, scope, and stock, and this thing (minus the orange tip) looks frighteningly real.

The gun mode is a pretty solid object. It fit comfortable in my hands, and you can squeeze the spring-loaded trigger.

Yea, you can see a lot of the panel details, and I’m not sure there’s much that really can be done about that.

The fact that such a solid, and fun, evil robot can even compress into something so compact is really good engineering.

Once you add the silencer, scope, and stock it completes that classic Megatron gun mode.

The only true issue have with this mode is that the silencer is a very loose fit, so if you’re holding it in your hands the silencer slumps down a bit, and I’m not a fan of that. I’m sure there’s a way to tighten that connection, but I’ll have to do a little research on that.

As a static object it does looks really good.

Comparing MP-36+ to the original G1 Megatron you can see how near identical they are except for the size difference. 

Accessories:

Moving on to accessories (aside from the collector’s card) are the arm cannon, scope and stock, smooth chest panel, and three additional faces (cartoon accurate)

--Alternate chest:

Megatron comes with two chest plates, both chromed out in silver. One has just the Decepticon badge, and other has the black curly-Q’s from the original G1 toy.

The chest slides off very easily, and is a breeze to snap on.

--Alternate faces:

Aside from the G1 toy-styles face Megatron comes with three faces which are more accurate to the Sunbow cartoon design (which also came with the original run of the figure) which is a neutral face, and yelling face, and a laughing face. 

Thanks to the swappable faces of Masterpiece Megatron you can make your own tragedy & comedy muses. So that’s cool.

Orange Tip:

The orange cap over Megatron’s gun barrel has been a big road block for me in not only posting this figure, but every other toy that I’ll be posting after this. 

The orange tip is meant to be a safety plug so that police don’t confuse Megatron’s gun mode for a real gun. It’s an admirable gesture, and I do agree with it, however for my copy I believe some jokster super glued the plug into the barrel, and that has been a problem for me...

The tried and true method for removing the plug is to heat it up with a blow dryer and it’s supposed to be easily removed with either pliers or just your fingers. I attempted that a several times, and it didn’t work, so I’ve had to resort to other methods.

I’ve been using a dremmel to bore out the orange plug, and it’s widdling it away  but I have to be careful not to damage the toy, which I might have already scuffed up the barrel of the gun at this point. It’s been a slow and annoying process. All because some clown thought it would be funny to super glue the plug... 

Final Thoughts:

In my opinion MP-36 is a fantastic Megatron, and a great addition to my Masterpiece collection.

The figure is solid, is really fun to pose, and I love the modified face of the original toy; this collectable has got a lot of personality.

My concerns are to be very careful with the transformation; it can be complicated (especially with the legs), but a little fun too, and I’m worried the chrome silver will eventually chip away, especially in areas that are clipped together during transformation.

I highly recommend the figure, however be wary of that orange plug. I have been trying, and trying, and trying to remove it, and it’s got to be glued in; someone though they were really funny, and I’m not laughing.

[vicar-dei]

And now we’re finally wrapping up Dead Cells

Okay, no need for introductions here. You all know why you’re here, so let’s get into the good stuff!

(If you haven’t read the first part of this Dead Cells series of posts, please be sure to check it out here so you don’t get confused.)

We last left off with the Beheaded heading into the door that leads to the finale of Dead Cells. You’re taken up to the Astrolab, where you encounter… the Collector? As a big surprise to absolutely nobody, The Collector reveals that he is The Alchemist, former servant of The King, and in pursuit of a cure for the Malaise. He found this cure in the Panacea, a mystical cure-all that’s made using a very large amount of life energy. Luckily, he has plenty of life energy, since you’ve been supplying him with it from the very beginning of the game.

The Alchemist then creates the Panacea before taking a sip, becoming SWOL AS FUCK. While the Panacea seems to be effective, it came with the downside of driving the Alchemist mad with power. After asking The Beheaded to go back to the beginning and bring him more cells, The Alchemist teleports you to the Observatory, and your epic battle begins!

 This boss fight is a bit unique; usually, once you kill a boss, it’s a done deal. The Alchemist, however, is an asshole and will heal himself repeatedly when he’s at low health by drinking the Panacea, before warping you to a new map. This will repeat several times before you notice that the Alchemist drinks the Panacea again, but this time it harms him. You can knock the Panacea out of his hand and steal it, take a sip for a nice damage boost, and beat him once and for all.

You get to stomp out the Alchemist, quite literally, and now it’s just you and the Panacea. Your body begins to dissolve, and you accept that this island is doomed to fall to the Malaise due to you killing the only person capable of re-creating the Panacea, but at least you’ll be too dead to care about these alive-person problems... Except, you don’t die. You return to your little jelly form, and crawl to a nearby pipe as the credits roll, taking you back to the Prisoner’s Quarters once more.

Warning: If you’re not a fan of time traveling fuckery, TURN BACK NOW!

This nightmare never seems to end. As you prepare to go on ANOTHER run through the game, a portal opens behind you, and you’re whisked away to the Clock Tower. There, the Timekeeper intends to kill you here and now, to see if your absence in the timeline will help with the Malaise. However, a portal appears right as she kicks you, teleporting you to a timeline where you have yet to kill The King. I can only guess that this portal appeared due to the timeline itself becoming unstable, thanks to all the meddling from the Timekeeper.

The Beheaded is probably tired of all the teleporting at this point, but there’s a silver lining to this! You reach High Peak Castle AGAIN, and you fight the Hand of the King AGAIN, and you come face-to-face with The King…. AGAIN! This time, things are a bit different, however. You have a new ability now: the ability to detach your head from your body temporarily. With this new ability, you decide to take over your original body, becoming The King once more. You still don’t remember everything, but you DO know that this body feels really good and that you want to keep it. The body in question is already degrading, and there’s only one way to solve that; time to pay The Alchemist another visit!

After beating and stomping in the Alchemist’s head once more, the Panacea seems to react to your body differently. It cures The King’s body of its degradation, and you feel like a new man…. blob… thing! The game cuts forward a bit in time, showing you relaxing on your throne and remembering the fun you had climbing out of the Prisoner’s Quarters. You’re then met by a familiar face; The Beheaded from this timeline! Yea turns out that he has been trying to get up to High Peak Castle this whole time as well. The two of you clash, and that’s the last thing you see before the credits roll once again.

Okay, so what the hell happened at the end there? Well Motion Twin, the creators of Dead Cells, decided to go with the “messing with time and space” angle for their story. Overall, I think this was a fine enough ending, although it leaves a lot up to the imagination of the player. Keep in mind, the entire reason I wanted to go over the story of Dead Cells was so that I could (finally!) go over some of the subtle hints that were dropped in the game, and hopefully try to make more sense of everything.

I’ll end things off here for now. Thank you to everyone that stuck with me during this extended storytime, and I hope to have you all back here when I go over more details relating to the characters and the island of Dead Cells. Until next time!

[year2000electronics]

Tumblr's being weird and won't let me find the Dark Moon rewrite post. I think there was one where you explained the story behind it, at least?

I JUST HAVENT MADE A FULL POST ON IT IM SORRYYYY but i can do bullet points of what’s going down

- so basically this kinda comes from a place of me like. liking dark moon but wishing it had more Characters. so it started with making boss ghosts and then kinda escalated

- so the plot is luigi is looking for e gadd after he went missing in a place near the mansion called evershade valley, unfortunately along the way we see a flash of lightning, a scream, and then cut to darkness

- it fades back in and it’s revealed that luigi is now... a GHOST!! oh no! (this would be the main ‘gimmick’ of the game like how mansion 3 had gooigi as a big selling point)

- he realizes he’s in a lab and he’s been captured by a ghost researcher named professor evershade who said his ghostly dna seemed different somehow so he wanted to see more

- luigi explains the situation and asks if he can help him contact e gadd but all lines to him are dead- evershade theorizes that he must have been taken by the same spectre that turned luigi into a ghost, and luigi immediately goes ‘KING BOO....’ bc who else does he have beef with.

- evershade suggests that if they defeat the four rulers of the nearby mansions they can assemble the dark moon, an artifact that will make sure no ghost will be able to cause their own mischief again

- luigi agrees, and in the meantime evershade says he can try to work on a way to see if he can change luigi back from a ghost

- he uses the same teleportation device e gadd does in dark moon to get luigi in and out of evershades lab, and luigi usually winds up in the small garden which leads to the four mansions

- (meta talk here- the multiple mansion exploring and evershades appearance are meant to kinda trick the player into thinking that it’s a ‘different character same purpose’ scenario, like how both goombario and goombella are tattling goombas)

- (you also get access to regular luigi after clearing one or two rooms in the first mansion- this serves as a bit of a tutorial segment for ghost luigis abilities and how youll be able to switch between ghost luigi and regular luigi to accomplish different tasks)

- ghost luigi probably has the power of a portrait ghost himself, so would have abilities such as the ability to scare other ghosts into fleeing a room or scaring them into doing stuff for him (which would serve as both a puzzle solution and a short-term solution for any segments where you may be stuck as ghost luigi), there are also other abilities like passing through walls (but most new rooms will be VERY dark so it would be hard to suss out details), spectral wind, etc. regular luigi is the one able to catch ghosts though, and regular and ghost forms will often interact in puzzles like a slightly less co-op based luigi and gooigi system

- the first mansion, gloomy manor, is a pretty standard mansion, it’s very old and filled w cobwebs. the boss is a spider-themed ghost, madame moufette. she says the mansions been lost to time and now only the spiders and ghosts live there

- the second mansion, haunted towers, is... actually only a one floor lobby. it’s only when you take the elevator that you realize the entire building is underground and it leads you to a literal icy bunker where an arctic ghost, macready, has spent ages under the bunker and is convinced that a light wielding beast is hunting him down

- the third mansion, treacherous mansion, is a house of illusion, led by a chess-playing ghost named rook. there are stuff like portals, tv static, living suits of armour, the like. rook’s message to luigi is that not everything is as it seems in evershade valley

- luigi comes back from treacherous mansion and gives evershade the third piece of the dark moon, which is when evershade reveals he had the fourth piece of the dark moon all along- and. here’s where things get fucky wucky i’m so sorry

- evershade lifts his goggles and takes off his hat and reveals that HE’S luigi from the future. after the events of mansion 1, luigi eventually decided to become an apprentice to e gadd and became a full time ghost researcher. things don’t seem so different at first but unfortunately e gadd game-overs and so luigi is left all on his own. which is a bummer. with his mentor gone luigi throws himself into his work, neglecting going on adventures with mario to a point that he just stops getting invited... (took mario a VERY long time to stop asking though. make no mistake) over time he becomes a bit of a recluse and his curious and observant nature kinda becomes a hunger for knowledge... he wants to know just what the strange and unusual is and what makes it tick. he also starts using professor evershade as a pen name bc ‘dr mario’ gets people asking about his research for the wrong reasons. though not only does he become more curious but he gets very very bored. ghosts are just poltergeists, tricksters... they’re nothing without a leader. luigi tries to bring back king boo, he invents all sorts of things to try- but the one thing the professor did that he didn’t was invent that damn portrait machine (which has rusted and broken with time- it’s been like, 20-25 years at this point).

- basically, what starts out as ‘i need to bring king boo back so i can have a proper rogues gallery of ghosts to study’ turns into ‘i need to bring king boo back but why would i even defeat him? this is great for paranormal studies’ so yeah. now evershade would like to see the ghost world at its fullest power

- he time travelled back to the past to try and convince e gadd to free king boo (yes he made a time machine hashtag smart) but e gadd fights back, destroying the portrait machine he built. evershade is Angry about this and decides if he won’t help him... perhaps someone else will. his ‘time machine’ is actually a large building that affects all of evershade valley, so it, how it was 20 years into the future, was brought into the past. his backup plan was to trap luigi in evershade valley by turning him into a ghost and making him collect the dark moon shards that he had always wanted but couldn’t get (his ghost researching skills are fine but his ghost hunting skills are out of shape. he could have done that in the first place but he kinda wanted to see his old mentor again.)

- the dark moon itself is an artifact split into four parts bc its effect on ghosts is too much to stand, even for ghosts- it’d give whoever owns it absolute power over the paranormal world and its residents, so the four mansion ghosts have taken it upon themselves to protect them (evershades original plan also involved teaming up with king boo to defeat the ghosts and take the dark moon for themselves)

- (actually, the fourth mansion ghost is polterpup! the dark moon piece WAS in his collar but a certain evershade stole it after the doggy lets his guard down around luigi

- evershade, using the dark moons power, casts a blacklight into king boos painting and finally frees him, offering him ultimate power and ruling over ghosts if they work together as a team. king boo finds this hashtag funny so he’s like ok

- then, luigi gets teleported out of the lab before he can try and stop them. polterpup points him towards where evershades lab has been all along- the fourth and final mansion, old clockworks

- in there luigi finds e gadd being held hostage, where he reveals evershade was trying to threaten him into freeing king boo

- as ghost luigi you also experience side effects of the dark moon in this final dungeon, like controller inputs not working or luigi needing to stop and wrestle off a headache

- so yea... final boss is basically king boo fighting you and evershade cheering him on and you need to counter king boos attacks so that they hit the dark moon and destroy it

- luigi sucks up king boo.... LOL

- evershade is defeated and he doesn’t even have an evil monologue he just kinda stares at luigi unimpressed like ‘really? this is the route you’re taking’ and luigi silently just kinda grabs onto e gadd and whatever toads are in this game. and neither of them say anything

- somewhere in old clockworks a clock goes off, and all the rest of them do too (the one time you hear every clock in sync). fade to white and e gadd and luigi wake up in an empty field where a construction worker asks if they’re ok. pan out to reveal evershade is gone and there’s apparently a construction crew hoping to build four brand new buildings here in this valley

UM THATS IT LOL.... it’s rly overcomplicated i know. i’m sorry.

[thenextchapter22]

Stuffies

PART 2! Sleeping in the Devildom!

Description: Your first night was an easy sleep, but your second not so much...

or….adventures and cute stories with a reader/MC who carries stuffed animals around all over Devildom.

Pairing(s): NONE!

Word Count: 1,615

Link to my AO3: Click Here

Author’s Notes:  Okay so I was not expecting so many likes for this, but thank you very much to all those reading! :3 I hope you enjoy this chapter :)

Part One

_+_

Sleeping in your room while several demons slept in the same hallway was actually pretty easy the first night. You had passed out in the shockingly comfortable bed after dinner with the brothers (and wow was that a crazy time, you lived alone so you always ate alone and the banter was fun to watch, but the food was weird too) and snuggled close with your Panda stuffed animal Po, rubbing your cheek and nose in the ultra-soft plush tummy of the black and white bear that was about the size of a pillow. You even woke up with drool on her.

The first morning before school you had an eventful time meeting angels. Simeon was so pretty and kind, and Luke was hilarious with his huffing and puffing, but super energetic.

They didn’t seem to mind your stuffed animals, either, which was great. You said you stopped caring what people thought, but these were… immortal beings… so it was a little bit different than normal ‘people’.

_+_

Meeting the Angels

It was the morning of your first day at RAD and the room was full of demons, waiting for the new arrivals. You sat on the sofa between Belphie, who was falling asleep into his pillow, and Asmo, who was looking at himself in the mirror and fixing his eyeliner. Why, you weren’t sure. He looked gorgeous. You wore very little on your face, only a bit of liner and Chap Stick that was cherry flavored.

You held one of your oldest stuffed animals to your chest, trying to comfort yourself as best as you could. Meeting the Demons first was so shocking you didn’t realize how much it would have helped to have a soft or squishy friend in your arm until now.

Then, they strolled into the room. Lucifer stood to greet them, nodding his hellos, while you stared in awe. They gave off an aura that was so beautiful. Not a visible one, but it was like your soul was brighter, and your eyes were more open.

There were two of them, one was taller with dark hair, and the other shorter with blonde hair. Both wore white outfits, but had no wings which was sad. But you had only seen a few demonic forms so far—Lord Diavolo, Barbatos, his butler, and Lucifer, when you first came yesterday—so it wasn’t that surprising they would look human. It was probably easier to maneuver in hallways without huge wings or appendages like tails.

“And this is our newest human student.”

Oh, you were being introduced. You stood up and nodded your head, smiling a little shakily at them as Lucifer gestured to you. “It’s so nice to meet you!”

Simeon, the angel who seemed to know Lucifer after watching how they interacted, gave you a handshake that was elegant in the way he held your own hand like you were a princess or something. “A pleasure to meet you as well.”

The smaller one, named Luke, glanced up at you with a wide grin and said something of the same, but didn’t shake your hand. “You’re so pretty! And—oh, what is that? Is that a dog? You brought a dog to the Devildom?! Simeon, I want to bring a pet, pleeease?” He turned his eyes to the taller angel and begged.

Simeon chuckled. He pat Luke’s little head and the blonde haired angel huffed. “Celestial Pets would not survive here unfortunately. And I don’t think it’s a real dog, Luke.”

You shook your head. “Nope, it’s my stuffed animal. His name’s Fido. I know, super original, but I’ve had him since I was a kid.” You held him out for them to see. He was about 10 inches and was squeezable, and you felt he was perfect to take on your first day at RAD.

Simeon smiled kindly. “He’s lovely. Do you have others?”

Mammon spoke up from his place behind you on a separate piece of furniture. “Oh yea, loooads of ‘em. The entire bedroom is full, it’s insane.”

There was a smack, then a moan from the Greed Demon. “Shut up, Mammon, you insensitive prick,” Satan spoke up. “We’ve all got our collections.”

You were surprised Satan defended you but also happy about it. Knowing Mammon from the breakdown you had yesterday, he probably didn’t mean it to be insensitive, he just spoke before thinking.

“Well, then, I look forward to seeing more of your collection.”

Luke agreed. “Oh, me too! Do you have any with wings? Like a dove, or a peacock, or what about a flamingo!?”

And you all chatted for a bit, and you felt pretty excited for your first day. You were told you were going to meet one more person at RAD, and it had you giddy. Would they be just as kind? You hoped…

_+_

So yes, the first night was good, but after your first day at RAD—and that was a whole other story on craziness that included being overloaded with information on demon history and new math you would probably be terrible at, and also potions was a scary subject because you immediately thought of Harry Potter, and not to mention the many, many demons looking at you and probably wanting to either eat you or kill you—you just could not shut your eyes the second night.

It was past 11pm, the second day of school was tomorrow, and you had to get a good night’s sleep. It was obvious Lucifer demanded good grades from everyone. Sleep was an important part of that.

Maybe an almost midnight snack would help?

So you got up, put on a sweater over your long sleeved pajamas because it was pretty cold here at night, put your fuzzy pink slippers on, tucked Po under your arm, and went down the hallway as quiet as a mouse. You had a surprisingly good memory of places, and mazes were easy for you, and seeing as this house was a maze you found the kitchen quick.

You poured yourself a glass of milk—it looked like milk, and smelled like it, so you prayed it was milk—and sat on the barstool drinking it. Warm milk would be better, or tea, but you didn’t want to open cupboards and have anything bang or start the oven or stove, it looked way different from the ones at home.

There was a flickering of light in the corner of your eyes. You followed it to a room with books stacked high along the walls, and a couch and chairs around a fire going all by itself with brick towering above. Magic, perhaps, kept it burning.

The couch facing it directly was cozy looking so you sat on it, and sipped your milk staring into the hearth. Fire danced in your eyes and it hypnotized you. The warmth was great, and cascaded over your body like you were sunbathing. You liked the sun but heat without light was better, and this was perfect.

You found your eyes shutting and quickly placed Po beneath your head and yawned. Then you drifted into dreamland for a while, the heartbeat of the fire lulling you.

A soft touch on your body woke you up from slumber. The fire was blocked by a body, and your eyes opened and you glanced up to see Belphegor with his own black and white companion, his pillow, and noticed a blanket thrown over your body.

“The fire goes out at 4am, so you’ll get cold,” he said monotonously, then went to the next couch over and copied your position of laying on your side cuddled to your panda stuffie but him with his pillow instead, and you watched as he transformed in the blink of an eye. He was like a cow-hybrid, and had the tail just like one. He also had curled up horns, and you remember seeing those on other transformed demons. Was that a trait they all had?

His eyes glowed purple when he looked at you, mesmerizing like the fire but in a different sense. “Sleep, it’s late,” he said, curling his tail over himself like a small blanket.

And you did sleep, sort of instantly, too, the Sloth Demon following suit. It was probably one of the best nights of sleep you had in a long time.

_+_

“Aahhh~~ So cuuuteee!!”

The sound of photos being taken from a phone, and the squealing, woke you up. It felt too early, and you groaned, pressing your entire face into Po. “Uhhh, noo mom, please turn off the lights,” you begged.

A soft coo, then a poke to your cheek. “Aw, sweetie, it’s time to get up, although I hate to move you looking so darn adorable.”

You blinked away sleep and groaned, rolling your head back to see Asmodeus standing over you, dressed for the day in his uniform, and his D.D.D in hand, and still snapping pictures of you with it.

You covered your face with one hand. “No, stop,” you sleepily pleaded. “Too early, ‘m ugly.”

He shushed you and tapped your hand until it moved, and giggled when you cried as he took another picture. “You’re second to me in beauty, darling, don’t say such things! You and your cute little stuffed Panda bear, this is Devilgram worthy~”

There was a soft chuckle, and you shot your head over to see Belphie laughing at your face. “Beware, Asmo will post that almost instantly.”

“Already done!” the Lust avatar declared. “You’re famous, my dear~” he winked.

“You guys are so mean,” you pouted, shoving your face into Po. But little did they know, you were smiling the entire time.

[beautifulterriblequeen]

Trickster: an Ethari theory

I've had yea many Ethari headcanons, and I hope I live to have yea many more. Most of them are probably wrong, or incomplete at best. But boy are they fun.

I love to wonder what Ethari will really be like in canon when we get to know him for more than 3 minutes, but whoever he really is on his own, he will have an effect on Runaan , Rayla, and everyone who loves him, because they love him.

The first headcanon I can remember having for "Tinker" was that he could be like Leonardo da Vinci: a genius, creative, surrounded by beautiful ideas given shape by his hands, but also capable of creating deadly weapons, enchantments, and devices with equal beauty, and perhaps not really seeing where the line between them was. It was fun, but Ethari has ended up far softer than my headcanon, and I love and support him in his softness!

After a nice string of Ethari headcanons, this year I've started poking at the Trickster archetype and seeing if it applies to him. And I think it absolutely does!

Tricksters often seem like Chaos. But they're not. They're just Difference. "Chaos" is subjective. Like the "divergent" in "neurodivergent." Who says? Divergent from what, exactly? Perspective matters, and Tricksters have a very broad take on things which allows them to think outside any box people might try to invite them into.

My enjoyment of Loki has brought all kinds of ideas to my dash with the arrival of the Loki show. I've got a copy of the Edda, and I highlighted the hell out of it a couple of years ago as I searched for the roots of Loki's origin story. (It's truly fascinating reading and the symbolic language hidden inside their poetry is dazzlingly amazing and I'm super using it sometime just so you know)

Loki is a Trickster, and he's far from alone in myth and legend. Anansi, Coyote, and Sun Wukong are some you may have heard of. Aaravos is another, of course. Tricksters can be called upon to lend aid and wisdom when the rules don't have an answer for some extraordinary circumstance which the Trickster's people find themselves in. But that's not because they are truly outside the rule of order. They are actually a part of it. They are the catch-all for when the everyday ordinary rules fail people, and something "unthinkable"--in the literal sense--might just hold the answer.

This post crossed my dash today, and something finally clicked in my head, and all of this coalesced from what felt like separate places. But they're not separate, not anymore! Serotonin, baby. It's basically upped my headcanon to a full-blown theory.

What caught my eye was an answer to why Ethari's clothing is so determinedly asymmetrical, compared to Runaan's specifically, but Moonshadows in general. It's because of this:

Long protective sleeves below patterns on shoulders. A high collar paired with a bright and noticeable swoop around the neck. Fine detailing and graceful taste. Asymmetrical tunic point on the left, below broad strappy leather. Knee high boots with stylish protective gaiters.

And let's not forget the curling horns! In some comics, Loki has a broken horn. So does Ethari.

Yes, there is a lot of similarity here, but I'm not focused so much on the visuals as the reason they were chosen. Feel free to consider other aspects of Ethari's personality and how they might be similar to certain parts of Loki's. I did! But I wouldn't be me if I didn't go deeper than that.

My favorite book in the universe (so far) is Lois McMaster Bujold's The Curse of Chalion, and one of the many reasons why is because of her pantheon. It holds five gods, represented by a hand: Father, Mother, Son, Daughter, and Bastard. The first four all have their roles and places. The Bastard--the thumb--inherits everything else. He is the god of all things that do not belong to any other gods, and that includes self-sacrificing vengeance and queerness. He is a Trickster, and his influence on Cazaril's life is far deeper than at first glance. Chaos has its place. It belongs, and so do the Tricksters who engender it. God, I love this book. Please read it if you haven't. Bujold's work is amazing.

If you've seen or read any version of MDZS/Untamed, you know that Wei WuXian is a trickster. Competent and badass in battle, but playful and teasing to the point where sometimes even he isn't sure what he truly wants, he can bring a massive amount of power and focus when he wants to. It's always a matter of "but is it important to me?"

I love WWX so much. The Trickster vibe is very apparent in his character, and in a way you just don't get in Western media. We see him on his own, and we see him with family and loved ones. And he's always feeling something so intensely! He's driven by his emotions, for good or ill. He vibes with chaos, and he will create it if it doesn't exist yet. But he will also create family from nothing, and that's something you don't see enough of! WWX is a Trickster with an emotional preference for joy.

In TDP, Ethari doesn't have a lot of lore yet. It's being Moonshadowed because spoilers for future seasons, and I respect that. The longer the wait for S4, the more ideas I will just amuse myself with in the meantime--and yeah, this is one of them, so what? :))) But we do know a little about him.

He loves music. He loves to read. He leaves his mark on things in swirly form. He works very hard, even through headaches, because what he's doing is that important to him, even though he would much rather be making jewelry. He loves taking the time to polish rough stones into brilliant jewels, and he adores big pretty flowers and had them at his wedding.

Ethari has a temper, but he also loves puns. The weapons he crafts are exquisite: "light, elegant, strong, and clever." And he knew darn well that Runaan was trying to flirt with him, but why return a sentiment he may or may not feel yet when he can play with the overly earnest assassin just a little bit first?

Okay, just... A "simple craftsman" deciding that it's going to be fun to toy for a bit with a broody assassin's feelings? Would you risk that? Ethari got balls the size of the moon, and a brain to match. When he has to make weaponry, he does not half-ass it. Ethari's stabby creations nearly have a life of their own. His creations are literally called "trick weapons." This elf is a lot, okay. And it's possible that he doesn't even know how "a lot" he is. Yet.

We're meeting Ethari after he's found something that is, in fact, genuinely important to him: Runaan, and Rayla, and Laindrin too. Ethari has found a relatively stable place to settle and find a role to adopt. I say adopt, though, because making weaponry for his loved ones is not what he grew up wanting to do. It's what he had to do to keep them safe, once he found a place to bestow his heart.

But in the show, Ethari has lost his family, one by one. First Lain and Tiadrin, ghosted. Then Runaan, supposedly fallen on his mission. Then Rayla, ghosted for abandoning Runaan. He and Rayla have reconnected now, but the rest of his family is still out of his reach. If Rayla has indeed told him, by S4, what she learned at the Moonhenge in TTM, then Ethari may parallel Rayla's journey to seek answers. But even if he doesn't know yet, and gets pulled into some other story arc first, we will be seeing Ethari without his family.

Remember the ATLA episode "Zuko Alone"? Consider: "Ethari Alone."

Ethari has chosen, for love, to fit himself into a box that wasn't of his own making. And now that box has broken. His family doesn't need him to be their craftsman anymore. Perhaps others will need him to be other things to them. Or perhaps he will know that his family does need him, but to be far more than just a maker of pretty swords. A rescuer, perhaps. A healer, a guide? An avenger?

A trickster. Capable of taking many shapes, because he understands them all. Ethari works with form and function. If he needs to transform himself, he will.

That's what Tricksters do. It's delightfully queer and delightfully neurodivergent. Ancient peoples accepted and revered the different among them and actively sought their help with things they themselves struggled with.

Tricksters are Difference. Sometimes that manifests as chaos, sometimes as genius. But if you do not love and appreciate your chaos, it will absolutely turn on you. Wei Wuxian did. Loki certainly has, many times. Perhaps Aaravos is doing so as well.

I cannot wait to see what Ethari does with his difference. I have something very specific that I hope he goes and breaks.

All this from a picture of Tom Hiddleston in his Avengers 1 Loki costume? Yeah. Because Ethari was designed to wear asymmetrical clothing, in a Moonshadow culture that prides itself on balance. Sure, there are some other Moonshadows who wear this or that asymmetrical item, and I do love to see it. But Ethari has the most asymmetrical lines of them all. The meta glee I feel knowing that Moonshadow elves are designed to hold many layers of meaning in their appearances--that the writers, creators, and character designers just flexed with them--is truly a delight.

Ethari is asymmetrical. The full and practical application of that is a glass casket, and I hope it becomes a gift that keeps on giving, because boy do I want to keep receiving it. But right now, I'm genuinely seeing evidence of the Trickster archetype in him. And I really hope it gets to come out and play.

[kandyrezi]

So to provide some insight into some of this stuff, just based off of what I recall - the Satanick and Lil marriage doesn't seem to be purely political, because there are comics of Lil actually coming to comfort Satanick (hoping we get more of her in the future...), and DSP does seem to consider some of the depth with Satanick and such? Ivlis is just currently real fucking beaten down in general, which kinda sucks, and sucks a lot of the life out of him though. APSID is post neutral end of TGG tho, so we might get to see some more pre-nick Ivlis!! Regarding Etihw, a HUGE part of the issue was VGPerson's translation - whilst they did do an amazing job with translating it, they also took a lot of creative liberties with it, resulting in a flanderised version of Eti being presented to the western audience. This is both how we got Eti using they/them pronouns, bc of a misunderstanding of how the pronouns for Eti were used (for reference Eti uses Boku style pronouns, so the closest equivialent we've got is she/they??) And how we ended up with an Etihw who says stuff like "doo-doo head" and such, which is... wildly inaccurate to their character. They're a fair bit more mature in the original japanese with their teasing, from what I recall, which also explains some of the inconsistencies, but still innocent w/ regards to nsfw stuff, from what I remember? Also, speaking of VGPerson's mistranslations, did you hear about the Crow thing? Who we know to be Crow isn't actually Crow, Crow is a secret... child(?) of Kcalb's, we don't know the exact generation gap, but the person who he talks to isn't Crow!! Which is HUGE news, and a crazy mistranslation, that reframes a whole lot of things. With that said, this is all coming from someone who dislikes SatanIvlis with a PASSION, and had to live through the hell year of 2016. Whilst stuff does seem to have slowed down somewhat, and there is a fair bit more of the... memey stuff, for lack of a better word, there does seem to be some character development there? The stream thing may have been out of context, since the Wiki only reports the information that was provided, not the questions that were asked along with it, so the safest way of checking would be to hit up the stream itself. I'd imagine the context would have been someone asking if Satanick loved Ivlis/Licorice or such-- Sorry for the huge ramble in your inbox!! Turns out Tumblr removed the ask length limit, which was a choice, but yea! Hopefully we'll get more content that does dig into the depths of the characters in the future, take the english version of TGG with a grain of salt, I may or may not have been the anon who encouraged the original post that sparked all of this, Carnival Rhythm is in production, and Ear Theory is the new hotness! (also regarding the actual character depth thing, I imagine all it takes is some kind of bigger piece, since it's a lot easier to make content that memes around with characters than to dig into the depth of them, and with all the stresses going on for her, memeing around is almost certainly easier...)

I already had a hunch it was you, Piralos. lol hello~

I don't think there's anything inherently bad about taking creative liberties, since word-for-word japanese translations will otherwise result in being stiff and awkward. it's more about translating concepts and ideas, so taking creative liberties is an inevitable par for the course. I don't take issue with vgperson's translation either because things like different speech patterns and personal pronouns can be difficult to communicate into english.

admittedly the beach scene with Eti calling Kcalb an ultra doo-doo moron head is funny as fuck and I love it, but I understand if it isn't completely "accurate" to their character in the first place. my main issue with Etihw was the fact that they've been described as a "sheltered damsel" (in that trio pic with Fumus & Siralos), there was also something about them never having gone through anything traumatizing (I can't remember the exact phrasing but it was something alluding to that). they're a literal GOD who went through a war and had their subordinates die in it?? even if they never directly participated in it, it still doesn't make sense as to why they would be described as 'sheltered' of all things.

it's partially confusing because sometimes you can't really tell if DSP decided they wanted to change a character's core personality as a whole, or if a trait that wasn't there before/wasn't outright obvious is suddenly applied to said character - and any plotholes / gaps revolved around that are going to be filled in not until... years later at this point, so it becomes very frustrating when the line between the two becomes blurred: "is this a complete personality change because DSP didn't like the character's initial idea, or was it always planned and it's going to be explained later on in an upcoming story?" (like that point about Etihw I made just now about them being naive)

also, ain't nothing wrong with the meme'ing of their characters - even I like to see it, just tired of seeing the two same characters used in said act of meme'ing, yanno? STNK & Ivlis do seem to be getting more development outside of that (and small little quirks as I saw) to their characters, which is great, but it would be better if said development didn't constantly revolve around ONLY eachother.

I pretty much stopped going to the streams long ago, so I'm not sure what's been going on or really keeping up with any recent information. if that is the case though, then the "does he love" question seems kinda pointless to ask considering he's already professed his love to Ivlis in some of the mini-comics. would have been more of a plot twist if the answer to that were "no" lol.

I'm not quite sure what the "ear theory" is about (unless you meant war theory lmao). I do have quite a bit to say about ears though: did you know I thought Sal & Samekichi had elf-like triangle shaped ears at first, but then the manga revealed they instead just had normal, round-ish human-shaped ears??? kinda weird seeing them like that tbh.

[bakujho]

Strap in folks, it’s rant time.

So, let's talk a bit about manipulation and abuse present in fandom. It’s uncomfortable, but fuck it lets go, I’m tired of the “good vibes only” push that sweeps all this shit under the rug. I’m not pretending to be an expert by a longshot here and I’m happy to discuss, but I have dealt with enough abusive and manipulative people personally and professionally to spot em a fucking mile away and generally keep my distance. Unfortunately, I’ve noticed a gross trend where there are people being attacked, then are guilted into keeping quiet because the Abusers make it seem like it’s not worth mentioning or that it doesn’t really matter... Unfortunately, the Abusers know exactly what they’re doing, they’re really fucking good at it, and they know exactly the kind of response they’re going to receive (because in some cases, this isn’t the first fandom they’ve pulled this same shit in). 

Right off the bat though, lets get some basic facts about fandom out of the way. No one in fandom owns any character: be it interactions, personality or anything else about said character. No fandom creator owns an idea, or has any right to tell people off for having similar ideas/techniques/styles etc. There’s no such thing as a completely original singular thought, and pretty sure if you think of something ‘original’, there’s inspiration from another source. No one owns a hairstyle, a costume, a backstory, a colour scheme, an item, a scar etc etc. If someone has a similar thing, neat, clearly you’ve got similar tastes. If someone has a carbon copy of your creation on multiple points, ABSOLUTELY question it, but having the same hairstyle isn’t copyright infringement, and having a similar history isn’t ripping someone off, it’s coincidence. 

Going to put the rest under the cut, CW for manipulation tactics, abuse, and all those sorts of goodies.

So, I’ll start with the Abusers here. Everyone knows who they are, they know who they are, unfortunately the victims of them are worried about speaking out because, for the most part, the ones abusing people are in a position of perceived power and speaking out against them can put the victim in a tricky position. No one wants to be ousted from a fandom they enjoy for speaking out against someone that’s been around fandom since its inception. Which brings me to my first point.

Power: Abusers LOVE the feeling of having power (be it follower count, general clout, perceived hierarchy etc) and get really uncomfortable when they feel someone new comes to threaten their position. So, what do these people do in that situation? Option A is to completely ignore and hope they’re not dethroned, Option B is befriend immediately and subtly manipulate the person to keep a close eye on their actions. Keep your friends close, but enemies closer amirite? 

So how the fuck does a person subtly manipulate another person, shouldn’t it be obvious? Fuck man, I wish. But there’s a lot of different techniques used to keep people reigned in and submissive: guilt tripping, evasion/diversion, attention seeking, lying, intimidation, playing the victim etc etc. So obviously these will all present differently based on the abuser, but the goal of all of them is the same. To stay in power, and keep control over everything they can. 

So how would all of these present online? (of course these examples leave some wiggle room for context lost in text/translation/cultural differences etc, but for the most part it all fits the same pattern that the abuser would use in a face to face situation). 

Guilt- tripping: “Well you wouldn’t be here if not for me” “You owe me for your place in the fandom” “well if we really were friends you’d do this for me…” etc etc. Things that pit your emotional attachment to the Abuser against you, the closer you are, the easier it is. Suddenly the Victim finds themselves indebted to the Abuser for their ‘friendship’ that the Victim didn’t realize was conditional. 

Shaming: Invalidating the victims feelings by saying things like “even a child knows better than this”, “it’s okay you don’t understand, you’re probably young”, “I’ve been around fandom longer so I know how things go” etc etc. It makes the Victim feel like they’ve done something wrong by drawing boundaries for themselves, or sticking up for themselves. Remember, the Abuser doesn’t want to lose their crown so they will talk down to their Victims to make them more unsure of their stance, second guess themselves, and feel bad that they spoke up in the first place. 

Projection: “Others have done X to me, I would NEVER do the same” It’s a simple yet effective tactic. The Abuser takes the things they’ve done to people, say it happened to them, and shift the blame to the now faceless enemy so the Victim feels obligated to side with the abuser because, yea, those things mentioned fucking SUCK and no one wants to experience it. No one wants to be that asshole saying “no you deserved it” (because no one fucking deserves to be doxxed, swatted, hacked, etc etc)

Playing-the-victim: Abusers LOVE playing this game. It’s their bread and butter to set the stage for manipulation. “Having a really hard time rn, sorry im such a fuckup”, “struggling with mental health”, “this is all so hard for me” (legit though, if you are struggling please seek help where/when you can, mental health is important). So any of these statements alone can be harmless, and overlooking someone's mental health can have dangerous outcomes, HOWEVER, when these sort of statements are paired with the other things mentioned, it’s no longer simply a vent or a way to work past personal demons, it’s a way to gain sympathy and support, and it is very intentionally done to garner that emotional response from those that will listen to them. 

Attention-Seeking: can be as simple as “no one interacts with me anymore”, making a dramatic vague post, deleting that same post and making a newer, more dramatic post but this time seeking affirmation from the good responses of the last post, posting cryptic messages that ooze “ask me what happened” (vaguebooking is a plague), basically anything that is asking for a response without asking. How is it manipulative though? Guilt. If you’re aware of the Abuser, these types of posts are meant to abuse the Victim's sense of empathy, the natural response to these sorts of posts is “what happened, I’m sorry that happened to you”. 

Diversion/Evasion: straight up changing the subject or switching the blame to anywhere BUT the Abuser. The Abuser says “change X you’re copying me”, the Victim responds “I feel I didn’t copy you”, and the Abuser presses “well the fandom might not think so” and changes it from a personal issue to a larger, more aggressive problem. In this case, the Abuser is the ONLY one with a problem, but are purposely misleading the victim to take the blame off themselves. It’s not THEIR problem, it’s the FANDOMS problem...now making it the Victims problem. 

Blame: Abusers love to blame everyone BUT themselves for their perceived problems. Fandom isn’t interacting with them as much? It’s the fandom that’s dying. More drama in the fandom? Well there’s too many people here now. Getting called out for bad behavior? That’s the problem of the person who CLEARLY doesn’t understand how fandom must work. It’s the age old tale of “I’m perfect, it’s obviously everyone else who is wrong”. At what point does the Abuser realize that they may be the cause for their own misery? They don’t. 

Intimidation: This is a fun one that’s usually a last resort because if the Abuser is pretending to be a sheep caught in a snowstorm, it doesn’t look good for them to publicly announce they’ve been the wolf the whole time. It looks like “well I have X on you”, “if you only knew what I could say about you”, and “I could ruin you” type shit. Of course, in most cases, the Victim hasn’t done anything to warrant this sort of aggression, but the queen is losing her pawns and is now grasping for anything to fight back with. And who knows what sort of lengths the Abuser has gone to to gain information on the victim. It’s pretty easy to find out a lot about a person online, so the Victims back down due to the threat of the unknown.

Avoidance: refusing to talk about the problem, which is an issue I have with fandom itself, in this case. The “no drama good vibes only” is so fucking detrimental when there are problems that need to be addressed. An Abuser will push the narrative that they’re only here for a good time and don’t want drama, while actively creating drama in the shadows. Its not a problem if we don’t talk about it, right? If no one knows, it’s fine. It’s fine. No, it’s manipulative, and if there are problems they NEED to be talked about, because that’s how you find resolutions. 

Denial: This one ties in with avoidance and blame, in that the Abuser will straight up deny that they’ve ever been, or have ever created a problem. The Victim is making a big deal from nothing, they can’t control how others feel about them, so they’ve done nothing wrong. The Abuser will claim they had the best intentions when approaching someone, so clearly they have done nothing wrong. 

Lying: Including omitting any information from arguments that may paint the Abuser in a bad light. The Abuser absolutely doesn’t want anyone to find out what they’re up to, so they’ll say exactly what they need to to change the narrative surrounding them. It could be minor changes to conversations to complete fabrications. Ex “I only approached X to make sure they were okay after X happened”, but X screenshots tell a completely different story. It’s not always easy to catch an Abuser in a lie, especially when there’s the push for “no drama” so no one talks about their personal experiences and can confirm/deny what was/reported to be said. 

So bringing all of those points together and bringing it back to the Abuser wanting to have the power to control what they like/don’t like in fandom. Once they have that feeling of invincibility, they may coyly ask people to delete posts that could lead back to them looking bad, politely ask another creator to change their creation because the Abuser doesn’t like it, or them asking nicely to stop interacting with another member of fandom the Abuser doesn’t like. It may not seem like much at a first glance...after all they asked nicely. However, once you look a little harder and a little longer, it becomes very clear that the intention is to stay in control. The Abuser will do ANYTHING to stay on top, and will employ every trick they have in their arsenal to sew discord and mistrust amongst other members of the fandom to keep the fingers pointed anywhere but at themselves.

So, sound familiar to anyone? My inbox is open for anyone who wants to chat about the topic. If I’ve now made you uncomfortable and you’re going to unfollow/block, cheers, wish you the best. And if you’re feeling called out and attacked by my post? GOOD, stop being a fucking shitty person. 

A few last reminders before adding some resources:

Setting and enforcing personal boundaries is not abuse.

Choosing not to interact with those who make you uncomfortable is not rude.

It is important to call out abuse when you encounter it, it could save someone from becoming a victim themselves.

Always stand up for yourself, you’re your own best advocate. 

Now for some resources: I used a few of these while researching along with my old textbooks from my psych, abnormal psych, and human relations classes I took back in university.

Manipulation tactics

How to recognize a guilt trip

How to spot an attention seeker

[fatehbaz]

On soil degradation and the use of non-native plants as weapons to change landscapes and sever cultural relationships to land; and on the dramatically under-reported but massive scale of anthropogenic environmental change wrought by early empires and “civilizations” in the Bronze Age, Iron Age, and ancient world (including the Fertile Crescent, Rome, and early China): I didn’t want to add to an already long post.

This is a Roman mosaic, from when Rome controlled Syria, depicting an elephant (presumably the Asian species, Elephas maximus) interacting with a tiger (the Caspian tiger, a distinct subspecies of tiger, lived in Mesopotamia, the shores of the Black Sea, and Anatolia up until the mid-1900s). This mosaic is striking to me, because I guess you could say that this is clear evidence of the higher biodiversity and more-dynamic ecology of the Fertile Crescent in the recent past, until expanding militarism and empire led to extensive devegetation. After all, does the popular consciousness really associate elephants and tigers with the modern-day eastern Mediterranean and Anatolia? Not really. But for the majority of human existence, lions, tigers, elephants, and cheetah were all living alongside each other in Mesopotamia. Pretty cool.

Anyway, I wanted to respond to this:

Which was in response to a thing I posted:

Pina: Thanks for the addition! I don’t know much about the technicality Rome’s devegetation of the Mediterranean periphery, but - like you - I’ve read some cool articles about it, and then forgotten to bookmark them. (I know that I have at least one good article in print form, about Roman devegetation; I’m going to try to find it.) I’m glad you mentioned it!

The first image is in the public domain and depicts a rhino-shaped ritual wine vessel made of bronze, from about 1100 to 1050 BC, during the Shang era. (The piece is housed at the Asian Art Museum of San Francisco.) The second image is another bronze wine vessel from a site in Shaanxi Province, this time inlaid with gold and hailing from later in history during the Western Han period, about 205 BC to 10 AD. (Photo by Wikimedia user Babel/Stone.) The rhinos in both of these pieces are depicted with two horns, meaning that they likely depict the Sumatran rhinoceros; this is corroborated by the existence of fossil remains of Sumatran rhinos from across China prior to 1000 AD.

On devegetation in the ancient world:

Yes, it feels like the ecological effects of empires prior to the Middle Ages are not just “under-discussed,” but dramatically overlooked. Some “quintessential and iconic African fauna” like lions and cheetahs lived throughout the Fertile Crescent, until devegetation during the late Bronze Age and, a few centuries later, the ascent of Rome. Caspian tigers (a distinct subspecies of tiger) also lived nearby, in Anatolia, the Caucasus, the shores of the Black Sea, and Persia - right up until the 20th century, in fact! (Other iconic species present on the periphery of ancient Mesopotamia were Asian elephants; leopards are still present.) Aside from the devegetation of the Fertile Crescent and the later landscape modifications of Rome, I also don’t see a lot of popular discussion (there is academic discussion, though, obviously) of ecological change in Zhou-era and early imperial China, either. While early Mesopotamia is famous for the amount of social prestige ascribed to irrigators and engineers, who were evidently essential to maintaining the domesticated crops so important to “hydraulic civilization,” early China (apparently) also revered irrigators and engineers. At least according to folklore and written histories, before the Han period, seasonal floods, especially in the Yangtze watershed, would regularly destroy human settlements. Also, there far more tigers, leopards, rhinos, and elephants present; rhinos and elephants lived as far north as the Yellow River until empire really expanded, and the animals lived as far north as the Yangtze River into the European Renaissance era. So, those people with the technical expertise to “tame the wilderness” by damming rivers or calming floodwaters were given prestige and sometimes treated as folk heroes. [Chinese history is not a subject that I really know a lot about. I’m just relaying the observations made in one of the better books on environmental history in East Asia, which is Mark Elvin’s The Retreat of the Elephants - 2006.]

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On empires’ use of soil degradation to “sever connections to land” and “indirectly” destroy alternative or resisting cultures:

Seems that empire uses ecological degradation to enact a “severing of relations” (in Zoe Todd’s words). Basically: If you destroy somebody’s gardens, then they have to come to you to buy food. Furthermore, destroying someone’s connection to land will also harm their cultural traditions rooted in that land, eliminating a threat to the imperial cultural hegemony and erasing “alternative possibilities and futures” from the collective imaginary. (And destroying the imagination doesn’t just harm the invaded cultures, it also prevents the relatively privileged people living in the metropole or imperial core from “achieving consciousness” or whatever, wherein someone living in 150 AD Rome or 1890s New York City might imagine an alternative system and potentially dismantle the empire from within.)

It’s violence; destroying soil, cutting forests, it’s violence. But when empires destroy soil, they get to maintain a little bit of plausible deniability: “Ohhh, it’s not like we outright killed anybody, we just accidentally degraded the soil and now you can’t grow your own food. Damn, guess you have to rely on our market now, which also means you have to assimilate/integrate into our culture.”

Europe, the US, and the World Bank did this in West Africa after “independence.” They said “oh, yea, sure, we’ll formally liberate you from colonial rule.” But since the palm and sugar plantations were already installed, and many of the ungulate herds of the savanna had already been killed, what were new West African nations supposed to do? Miraculously resurrect the complex web of microorganism lifeforms in the soil? So what the US and its proxies are essentially doing is saying: “If you want loans, you have to keep the plantations and also install supermarkets to sell Coca-Cola.”

Todd: “The Anthropocene as the extension and enactment of colonial logic systematically erases difference, by way of genocide and forced integration and through projects of climate change that imply the radical transformation of the biosphere. Colonialism, especially settler colonialism – which in the Americas simultaneously employed the twinned processes of dispossession and chattel slavery – was always about changing the land, transforming the earth itself, including the creatures, the plants, the soil composition and the atmosphere.” [Heather Davis and Zoe Todd. “On the Importance of a Date, or Decolonizing the Anthropocene.” ACME An International Journal for Critical Geographies. December 2017.]

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On the use of non-native plants as a sort of “biological weapon”:

The use of non-native plants and agriculture to enforce colonization and empire is the whole focus of this influential book from Alfred Crosby. (I have some issues/criticisms of some of his work/theories, but his work is generally interesting.) Crosby popularized the term “neo-Europes,” and he proposes that European empires attempted to subjugate the native ecology of landscapes in Turtle Island, Latin America, Australia, etc., while attempting to introduce European species, cattle ranches, pastures, dairy farms, gardens, etc. in an effort to “recreate” a European landscape.

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Speaking of Rome’s devegetation of the Mediterranean: One of the famous cases of Roman devegetation that made the rounds recently was that of silphium. A couple of excerpts:

[From: The Original Seed Pod That May Have Inspired the Heart Shape This historical botanical theory has its roots in ancient contraceptive practices.” Cara Giaimo for Atlas Obscure, 13 February 2017.]

Silphium, which once grew rampant in the ancient Greek city of Cyrene, in North Africa, was likely a type of giant fennel, with crunchy stalks and small clumps of yellow flowers. From its stem and roots, it emitted a pungent sap that Pliny the Elder called “among the most precious gifts presented to us by Nature.”

According to the numismatist T.V. Buttrey, exports of the plant and its resins made Cyrene the richest city on the continent at the time. It was so valuable, in fact, that Cyrenians began printing it on their money. Silver coins from the 6th century B.C. are imprinted with images of the plant’s stalk -- a thick column with flowers on top and leaves sticking out -- and its seed pods, which look pretty familiar: 

[End of excerpt.]

Silphium is extinct now. There is a lot of conjecture about what, specifically, caused the extinction. But it looks like the expansion of Rome across the North African coast of the Mediterranean, and Rome’s development leading to soil degradation, is a likely cause.

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Thanks @pinabutterjam​  :3

The scale of ecological imperialism’s effects ... planetary, no escape. It’s exhausting.

[tinysatansierra-blog]

Markiplier manor is toxic here’s why

So Markiplier manor (Markipliers official discord server) has gotten a surplus of new people in it, this happened a few weeks ago the manor itself though has been up for awhile. originally a members only server it was eventually opened up for everyone and yes there are alot of genuinely good people and the mods are alright but unfortunately its becoming a toxic environment. 

SO EDIT i have discussed with the mods that being said ... im keeping this up as a reminder of we can do better we can help people who are struggling through something instead of shutting them down we can listen to people who are being oppressed and bravely point out new media that only worsens that oppression and stigmatization and not just the mods who i was kind of harsh towards but who are human everyone as a community can do better and this is a large community think of the work we can do just doing the basics like boycotting problematic content and helping those who cry out for it who need it (and noticing and shutting down manipulative/toxic behaviors) ... i dont know if im going to go back to the manor yet tho im going to let this sit give it a week yall can agree or disagree but know that if you try to be an ass your going to get shut down and your feelings are going to get hurt 

lets start with the basics “triggering topics” triggering topics can be anything in particular but it generally means a topic that relates to another persons trauma. Now while it is important to acknowledge a persons trigger words and try to keep the conversation respectable ive also noticed people use it to shut down people who come on freaking out because their dealing with a stressful situation/something traumatic just happened. This has happened to me personally and to a friend with me it was about being pro choice and having to in short make that actual choice. i was discussing this in the bathroom because i (like anyone else who comes in with baggage) did not know about any pro choice discords at that moment and was afraid of being stigmatized or going onto a discord that says its a safe space only for it to be filled with trolls. Mark manor is labeled as a safe space and many people come on there looking for support with me no one told me that the topic was triggering to them (which apparently it was because a friend of theirs had to make the choice not her herself think what you will) they just went to a mod early on when i just found the server as a member a friend (who i wont name) had gotten.... assaulted majority of her werent online and as someone who has been there and yes when she told me it did trigger my own trauma she needed moral support... the mod shut her down and deleted her comments and didnt give her a pointer to any other discord where she could discuss the topic openly and get moral support and be pointed to resources (it actually took me ten minutes to find and confirm a lgbtq therapy chat earlier this year for another individual discussing mental health) this was before i had gotten on for that day but i noticed those messages and i contacted her when she told me what was up yea it triggered my memories and its not fun but I FUCKING HELPED HER i made sure she went to the police to atleast file a statement (while the police dont always help it is good to have it on file) i even made her a plush and shipped it out to her and i would do it again and again because its not good to basically tell another person to shut up because it triggers others not without atleast trying to help them find another fucking place and making sure their actually ok and in a physical safe place  next is them claiming the manor is a “safe space” a safe space is by definition  “ a place or environment in which a person or category of people can feel confident that they will not be exposed to discrimination, criticism, harassment, or any other emotional or physical harm.” you would also think that the manor would be a safe space in the fact that marginalized and oppressed groups of people would be able to point out problematic content and have an open and free discussion about it and how it makes them uncomfortable. especially people of lgbtq community which alot of people in that chat are. yesterday (and this was what caused me to officially turn away from the server) in the patio (which is the members only chat) a Transgender individual pointed out the problematic content that is huniepop and how it fetishizes trans people as well as other minorities now this game i hear tries to make itself out as a “parody” .... its not its a sexual dating sim what would make it a parody is if sex noises were replaced with donkey sounds and the lewd pictures were replaced with poorly drawn doodles of tits or what have you its a game for incels marks hilarious when he plays it because he doesnt take the game seriously my issue isnt with him its with the developer. and if you did not know (which apparently people dont) the character poli is described as “a girl with a dick” the individual pointed this out because they felt like it dehumanizes them and paints them as nothing more than a fetish... and also apparently you can “choose” is poli is trans which kind of gives off the message that people can ignore trans peoples identity if it makes them uncomfortable... or if they dont sexualize them. and the muslim community is more or less in the same boat i come from the bible belt in usa im not muslim i am not trans but i do have a reason for standing with both and i will get to that in a bit so i was raised in a christian household in a christian setting like muslim women were basically told we cannot have sex and any sexual thought is sinful and we will be punished blah blah blah your even more closeted if your gay or bi because then you can face ... violence that being said to make the woman from the middle east hyper sexual like they did is kind of shitty even for a incel pleasing sex game. the individual who thought it would be ok to discuss this in the server because its labeled as a safe space and is generally “lgbtq” friendly thus believing he would have people agree and discuss ... was unceremoniously shut down by their peers and a mod was notified this person was not hostile maybe a bit frustrated because he wanted to talk about it and thought he would have this genuinely helpful conversation and people would listen and spread the word because to have problematic content be popular can isolate the oppressed group even more so WHEN NO ONE WANTS TO LISTEN TO THEM. if a group of marginalized people notice something problematic with content and you claim to be an ally of said group then you need to acknowledge and support what they say. they told him to go to twitter where he could potentially be bullied and written off ... because again its an INCEL PLEASING SEX GAME.(which means incels if you ever dealt with them will go and say anything to justify the game even using slurs and bullying) and to put the icing on the cake to change the topic they brought up robin ... i actually dont know who robin is as i dont really focus much on youtube creators personal stuff (it feels off for me to not personally know an individual but know their personal stuff without having actually talking to them its weird i know its a thing i have in my head) but apparently they recently came out as female and good for them im super proud of him and the patio members were discussing how they were proud of him as well for beginning to wear makeup and making themselves more feminine which would be great if they werent trying so hard to shut down the trans male who was trying to spread awareness on problematic stuff .... something he pointed out ... and something they gaslighted and said he was being hostile. really its almost as if they only care about trans issues when its someone famous discussing them  so what can we possibly do about huniepop being transphobic and the answer is very easy BOYCOTT IT like... yall were up in arms and boycotted jk rowling with snap and a turn do we only cancel the old and ugly? do we only cancel those who we dont think is funny? mark is not at fault he probably doesnt realize it and any comments made on the issue are talked down upon or drowned amongst other comments im not saying to cancel him im saying to cancel the game HARD. ignore the posts bitch at the dev demand refunds for your game. like consumers have infinitely more power than corps want to admit.  so you basically have a community that claims to be a safe space but only if you want to talk about sunshine and rainbows and its highly hypocritical of them to claim safety.  another thing is emotionally abusive/manipulative people hide in the server and the mods dont ever seem to acknowledge it. i cannot tell you how many times ive gotten into arguments with people who seems nice then turn into assholes then claim to be the victim when i or others go off on them. if you recognize my name you know i dont stand down when it comes to having a snarky or rude comment thrown at me if your going to be an ass were fighting i dont care how nice you seemed beforehand and you dont get to call a mod just because i actually stood up for myself or others sorry not sorry dont be a bitch nuff said.  now why would i care so much about problematic content? why would i care and stand by the transgender and muslim people (aside from being ya know... an actual ally and not someone who claims it for sympathy and brownie points?) its because i am autistic i am also able to function well on my own but there is a movie created by the famous singer sia it is called music it is a movie frowned upon by the autisitic community because infantizes and dehumanizes non verbal autistic people i am fortunate and unfortunate in not having to deal with much stigma unfortunate because i wasnt diagnosed until i was 17 alot of answers about my behavior could have been answered if i had been diagnosed earlier but considering society loves the quiet timid female and i functioned “well” for neurotypicals i was ignored. so yea you bet your ass im standing with them and raising awareness about huniepop and their was this one person when i mentioned this point i cant remember there name nor to do i give a shit about them because when i mentioned how autistic people ... how i was in the same boat with music by sia (again i advise that no one target the actress who was under contract target sia and please boycott her so she knows she cant get brownie points or money for a movie that stigmatizes who she claims she wants to “help” (*cough* profit off of *cough cough*) and only serves as a feel good movie for neurotypicals and ignorant people)  they said “i heard people who hated the movie i heard people who found it alright people are ALLOWED to like problematic content” ... and like ... does anyone else see the problem here? its not hard at all to boycott celebrities for making content  and im going to repeat this point  IF A GROUP OF MARGINALIZED, STIGMITIZED AND OPPRESSED PEOPLE CALL OUT SOMETHING FOR BEING PROBLEMATIC AND YOU CLAIM TO BE AN ALLY YOU FUCKING LISTEN TO THEM AND DONT SHUT THEM DOWN I DONT GIVE A SHIT YOU DONT HAVE A FUCKING EXCUSE. if you cant bring yourself to boycott a piece of media and replace it with the infinitely more suitable forms that supports the group you claim to be for your not an ally your a fucking hypocrite  and that is why i left markiplier manor i am still a youtube special ... thingy member and i will continue to be a member to support mark i want people to overall listen to those who speak up against a creator and a piece of media and listen to us all no matter how “good” something seems. .. also there is a video called listen it was created by nonverbal autistic people  and communicationFIRST a group that sia apparently communicated with for her movie... and then ignored  https://youtu.be/H7dca7U7GI8