#Or them being friends and not partners. They're definitely platonic and they're definitely partners do you understand me

[lilacs-stash]

I figured out why Nickloon clicked in my head during my first watch through but Suitcase and Balloon didn't. The two just don't have chemistry, they're so very queer platonic and I just didn't consider that until aro-spec Balloon was canon. Nickel and Balloon how ever? They got chemistry.

[tossawary]

I think one of the keys to non-canon and rarepair relationships for me in fanfiction is that you have to respect the relationships that are already there. Not like in a "you have to do the canon relationships and then break them up first" way, because you can definitely make it so that the canon relationship in question never happened OR was never romantic or sexual if you want. But in a basic characterization issue kind of way.

For example, when I wrote a Shang Qinghua / Yue Qingyuan fic, I was looking at the ways to make that work given the Qijiu and Moshang situations. And I ended up making it so that Qijiu either never had or never fully developed any romantic or sexual feelings in this AU, but they're still inseparable as friends / brothers / platonic soulmates of a kind. You CAN'T write a Yue Qingyuan who doesn't care about Shen Jiu. It's just not on the table in terms of characterization.

(I mean, you could, I suppose, but then it's a case of, "Who the fuck even is this guy anymore? You undid his whole backstory and now he's a completely different person." I do think you can write interesting AU stories focused on character development in which Yue Qingyuan learns to move on after post-canon or in which perhaps Shen Jiu's treatment of Luo Binghe becomes an actual breaking point for their relationship, but even if things somehow get REAL BAD between him and Shen Jiu, I don't really think Yue Qingyuan will ever be able to stop caring completely.)

Likewise, I made it so that Moshang never fell into the master-servant situationship, and ended up as cooperative enemies / distant allies of sorts. But Shang Qinghua still thinks Mobei-Jun is sexy. That's his ideal guy! Airplane Bro still being a little weird about his favorite character is not really negotiable to me, even if he's in love with someone else. He has eyes! He can still look at other men disrespectfully! He just doesn't act on his attraction.

Like, you can totally just sidestep any romantic / sexual feelings and make it so they never existed, in order to pursue your pairing of choice. But you cannot easily deny, in my opinion, the basic fact of a character caring on a basic level about someone important to them. I think it gives weird "you're only allowed to care about your romantic partner / no friends allowed" vibes to just completely cut off all other relationships. There's not a hard line between "love-triangle-fixing polyamory" and "completely isolated from even friendships because maintaining friendships with exes is cheating somehow monogamy" as options here.

[g0dwat3rwritings]

Can i request for any twisted wonderland characters that's fit x reader who don't know how to cook

yeah, of course!

Some of these characters have shorter parts because I added every character in the game, minus side characters such as (Artemiy Artemiyevich Pinker (Che'nya), Rollo Flamme, et cetera)

Also! If there are any inadequacies with grammar, I apologize, I'm at a friend's house while i'm writing this and I'm very easily distracted.

If it's not obvious, I'm a sucker for soft Sebek

Ortho is strictly platonic!

And Reader can be viewed as either Yuu or not!

@nisobird because there's Azul

Warnings ;; None

Relationship ;; Romantic

Type ;; Headcanons

Heartslabyul

Riddle Rosehearts ;; Heartslabyul Housewarden ;; Second Year

Riddle's world comes crashing down, in all honesty.

The boy was raised with the ideal that a partner is supposed to be at least a decent cook, but you are the exact opposite.

He will eat your food only to be nice.

Even though he can't cook all that well himself, he'll try to suggest ways to make it better even though none of his suggestions really, truly help the awfulness of your cooking.

Let's just hope you don't end up cooking for his mother.

Trey Clover ;; Heartslabyul Vice-Housewarden ;; Third Year

Trey is quite literally the sunshine to your moonlight, your sky to your ground.

You two are total, clear opposites.

He can cook almost anything without flaw, especially pastries and sweets.

He will panic if he ever sees you in the kitchen, trying to cook something.

He'll subtly take over for you, slowly taking more and more control of the kitchen.

Cater Diamond ;; Heartslabyul ;; Third Year

Cater would not care one single bit.

He is taking so, so many photos and posting them on Magicam, he does not give two shits whether it looks amazing, or absolutely terrible.

He will post it, specifically because you're his partner, you're his significant other.

And yes, he will shove it down his throat even if he needs to vomit it up later.

Ace Trappola ;; Heartslabyul ;; First Year

Ace can't cook, not one bit.

He's also very weird about his tastes.

He'll eat pickles and ice cream but he probably won't eat a single slice of cheese.

He'll eat anything you make at all whatsoever, unless there's cheese. (I headcanon he absolutely hates cheese, don't ask why)

He'll watch you cook and won't even interfere.

He does notice how bad your cooking is but he won't say or do anything about it because he genuinely does not care.

He'll even tell you it's actually good

Deuce Spade ;; Heartslabyul ;; First Year

Deuce doesn't even notice how bad it is, and if he did, he wouldn't even care.

He'll anything and everything, minus bell peppers.

He cannot, and will not, eat bell peppers.

He hates the taste, the texture, everything about bell peppers is everything he hates in all of Twisted Wonderland.

He tends to not watch you cook and has no reason for it.

Savanaclaw

Leona Kingscholar ;; Savanaclaw Housewarden ;; Third Year

Leona's not exactly shameless when it comes to meats, despite any sort of meat being among his absolute favorite foods.

He's not very picky about meats though. Just as long as it's cooked decently, and seasoned alright, he's fine.

Despite being a literal prince, he does not have a prince's palette.

He'll literally eat raw meat if it suits his needs

Of course, that's mostly because of the lion beastman part of him

Ruggie Bucchi ;; Savanaclaw ;; Second Year

Ruggie is literally shameless, make him anything and he'll eat it.

Just as long as it's not rotten, he'll eat quite literally anything.

He's not the greatest cook, but he'll help in any way he possibly can.

He'll most definitely bring your food to the kids in his neighborhood, no matter how terrible it is.

He wants to make sure they're fed, and he's happy when you're willing to cook.

He never tells you if he genuinely thinks you're food is bad, he'll end up feeling terrible and he knows that so he won't say a thing about your cooking.

Unless it's any sort of praise.

Jack Howl ;; Savanaclaw ;; First Year

Jack isn't entirely picky, but he's not the biggest fan of your cooking.

Being who he is, he'll feel bad for even thinking that your food is bad.

Also being the honest man he is, he'll sadly point it out to you, admitting his wrongdoing.

He's a big sweetheart, so he'll try to be as kind to you as he can, no matter how you end up reacting.

Octavinelle

Azul Ashengrotto ;; Octavinelle Housewarden ;; Second Year

Given that Azul grew up with his mother owning a restaurant, and he himself owning a restaurant, he's a bit... iffy over your cooking skills.

Of course, he'll always be nice when he brings it up. You're his significant other after all.

He'll point it out and he may give you some of his mom's recipes to help you follow along.

He helps you cook much more than he used to, letting you have most of the control, but he will come in if he sees you do something wrong.

Jade Leech ;; Octavinelle Vice-Housewarden ;; Second Year

Jade finds you and your cooking very, very entertaining.

He doesn't ever actually help you unless he finds you cooking mushrooms and.... screwing them up.

After that, he's immediately on your case and helping you cook.

Within the next two or three weeks, you're an absolute master chef.

Especially with mushrooms. By time Jade is done with you, you're more than likely a better chef when it comes to mushrooms than he is.

Floyd Leech ;; Octavinelle ;; Second Year

Floyd thinks you are the most entertaining human he's ever met.

Like some other people, he doesn't think your food is bad, just that it's so unbelievably entertaining and unique.

He actually doesn't try to help your cooking or change it or buy you anything new.

He simply watches the chaos of your cooking unfold, while occasionally adding his own, odd concoction to the mix.

And he will eat your food, no matter what you put on his plate, or what you put in the odd concoction you call your cooking.

Just don't add any shiitake mushrooms, he begs of you.

Scarabia

Kalim Al-Asim ;; Scarabia Housewarden ;; Second Year

Kalim more than likely trusts you enough to not have Jamil test the food you give him.

The only way Jamil would let Kalim eat your food is if Jamil himself trusted you.

So, if Jamil trusted you, Kalim would more than happily eat your food himself.

He probably wouldn't care if your food was the best food in the whole of Twisted Wonderland, or if your food is the worst thing in all of Twisted Wonderland.

He'll eat it happily and won't complain one bit.

Jamil Viper ;; Scarabia Vice-Housewarden ;; Second Year

Jamil, if he truly trusts you, will eat small bits of your food and will help you cook every single time you step in a kitchen.

He won't completely take over like Trey would, but he will guide you in every single way, subtle or not.

Once you get better and better, he'll eat your food more and more.

He'll take over for you at any time and finish the cooking for you, if that's what you'd like, all you'd have to do is say the word.

Pomefiore

Vil Schoenheit ;; Pomefiore Housewarden ;; Third Year

You're going to make the Vil Schoenheit break out. And that's a feat, especially considering his rigorous skincare routine.

He won't eat any of your food, and he will flat-out tell you, in a relatively nice tone of voice, that your food is not exactly good.

If he realizes that it hurts you, he'll try to find ways for your cooking to taste relatively better, whether it be buying you new utensils, or buying you cookbooks or any other things like that.

He promises you that he never meant to hurt you, he just wants to... help.

Rook Hunt ;; Pomefiore Vice-Housewarden ;; Third Year

Oh, Rook does not care. He genuinely thinks that your cooking is beautiful and wonderful in every single way possible.

He will eat your food and compliment you even if you put whole-ass children's toys in your food.

He'll buy you whatever you need for your cooking without you even need to ask him, he's kind of a freak like that.

Epel Felmier ;; Pomefiore ;; First Year

Epel is very in the middle, he's fine with your bad cooking just.... don't make him eat it because he will act like a toddler having to eat vegetables.

Or, that's what he says he won't do.

He says he'll be all manly and eat it like a man, but you know for a fact that he won't and he will act like a little kid.

Ignihyde

Idia Shroud ;; Ignihyde Housewarden ;; Third Year

Idia barely eats as it is, so when you bring him food, his hair will immediately turn pink and he'll try to hide his face by tightening his hood over his head.

He won't care whether it's bad or good, he'll only care about the fact that you actually... brought him food.

Of course, Ortho does so all the time, but it's different when your significant other brings you a whole meal because they don't want you to starve.

Once again, he doesn't care whether it's good or bad, he'll shove it down his throat either way.

Ortho Shroud ;; Ignihyde ;; First Year

Ortho can't exactly eat, given that he's both a robot and a machine.

But he'll look up recipes and help you cook and help you get as best and as good as you can get.

He'll always help, and use every single upgrade he's ever got put into him by his big brother to help you cook as best as you can.

Diasomnia

Malleus Draconia ;; Diasomnia Housewarden ;; Third Year

Oh, boy. Malleus is scared that he has another Lilia on his hands. Of course, your food is not as bad as Lilia's, but it's still not, for lack of a better word, good.

He will eat it, but he'll compliment and praise your cooking in a very... odd way.

He'll compliment you, yes. But he'll also add in some, not-so-subtle ways you can improve.

Don't tell him, he genuinely thinks his attempts at helping are extremely subtle, when they are absolutely not.

Lilia Vanrouge ;; Diasomnia Vice-Housewarden ;; Third Year

Lilia, like Rook, Kalim, and Deuce, won't even notice that your food is bad.

And that is mostly because he, himself is a bad chef.

He's such a bad chef he can't even tell when foods are actually bad.

Even if he could tell that your food was not good, he still wouldn't care because he just loves you far, far too much to even think of pointing it out.

Silver Vanrouge ;; Diasomnia ;; Second Year

Silver is internally sobbing. First, his Father, and now, his significant other.

He's very sweet about telling you ways you can improve.

He actually does this with his father, too. But you're the only one who picks up on it, Lilia, sadly, does not.

Silver tries his absolute hardest to help, but he eventually succumbs to his sleep, but he always profusely apologizes afterward.

Sebek Zigvolt ;; Diasomnia ;; First Year

Sebek is oddly much sweeter about it than you'd ever expect.

He doesn't yell, but he does let you know that it doesn't taste good.

He explains ways you can fix it, despite he himself not knowing how to cook all that well.

He explains everything he knows about cooking to try and help you.

If Sebek manages to view a human as a significant other, or partner, he will dote on your every need or want in the sweetest way that you'd never, ever expect from him.

He's very sweet as he helps you cook, making sure that you do everything to the best of your genuine ability.

[mariii1]

♡YOUR NEXT HEALTHY RELATIONSHIP♡

(These piles are hella long, a lot came thru, this is open to everyone including ace/aro peeps 🤗 got this idea from FairySagMother on yt <3)

☆ Piles start from top left with pile 1 ☆

YALL messages came throughh, I made a good choice buying this new oracle deck. ALSO the theme card of this reading is the waterfall card because it was in FIVE of the six piles 😭. The oracke deck is Herbiary by Maia Toll if you wanna buy it 😜. I definitely won't be super active in the next 6 months tbh because I'm incredibly stressed out and a lot is happening especially with my physical health, just a heads up...ALSO THANK YOU FOR 777 FOLLOWERS 😘 FREE PALESTINE 🇵🇸

1. If you felt like people in the past were very selfish in relationships including your parents, this person is the opposite. They don't have you around just cause they want your attention, they genuinely care about your feelings and interests. You'll actually be able to connect with this person without feeling like things need to be transactional. If you feel you struggle with this concept especially if you have a low self esteem, working it out will bring this relationship in much faster. There's also no rush, no lovebombing and then ghosting, or trying to get you to commit quickly. This person seems very reassured within themselves and they expect you to not abruptly ghost/leave them without communicating why. I'm listening to Sociopathic Dance Queen and Feel Complete (by Pink Panthress); this person is the opposite of the antagonists in these songs. I hate being really woo woo but everything will happen as it should within this relationship. Your lives might be a mess but this relationship might be the only stable/secure thing when you get into it. I'm mostly getting romantic vibes but this could be platonic as well, although it will most likely start as a friendship and progress.

2. The cards were flying out so you either have a lot happening in your life rn and I'm getting for most of you, several healthy relationships will come in at the same time. If you're monogamous, you'll have several healthy options to choose from; if not, get ready to be to busy. You'll at least have a really good friend. I'm getting that with all of these people you are able to be vulnerable and specifically you're able to share interests especially if they're niche. Many or most of these relationships will last for a long time even if you do walk away from them at some point. If you're spiritual or religious your either going to meet someone who challenges your religious beliefs, particularly those that are restrictive or oppressive. They are not an atheist, they could actually be in the same religion as you but the are more self-assured and self-sufficient. If you're someone who often relies on the universe or a higher power to do things for you or to make them come your way, this person is going to force you out of that mindset. I'm specifically getting this will happen because you don't want to lose them and you'll see this mindset isn't actually working for you. They let you know it's ok to chase sometimes, especially when it comes to your own personal goals. This is specifically coming from that longterm friend I was getting at the beginning. I'm not really getting romance still, so love might be on the backburner for awhile.

3. I'm strongly getting this is a healthy s€xua1 relationship. It's not even a situationship tbh; you could be learning from a dominatrix or shibari master or maybe you pay to have that experience one day. I'm getting this might sound outlandish for some of you but a few of you are from pile 2 and this might come randomly or you might decide to do it on a whim. This person is very attractive and they take their job or interest seriously. They genuinely want you to feel comfortable and enjoy yourself. Especially if you are a s£x worker, this is someone you go out of your way to see orrr it's a new romantic partner. The emphasis may still be on s€x especially if you do OF, they'll probably help out, but they actually still have a personality and you can get along with them. I'm specifically getting a femme woman, or someone just who's afab but not super masculine. They are very sweet and attentive during play and have good aftercare. If this person does something you don't like, they'll listen to you without complaint. Even if this is a man, they are genuinely experienced and not weirdly misogynistic or abusive in any way. Boundaries are realllyy important to this person. They're just really good at creating a safe space.

4. Money, Money, Money by ABBA came up; this person will most definitely take care of you financially even if they are just a friend. I'm actually getting for some you, your get to get someone from a species that almost extinct: a man who treats you and is perfectly fine with just being friends NO S£X OR NUN in return🤯 this might make you attracted romantically to this person but I'm getting they could actually be married (they could be gay or queer in some way too) or they're just not interested in your romantically/sexually and just want to be besties. If you have anyyy health issues including paying medical bills they will help you out without a second thought. Some of you might unfortunately be in a situation where you get very hurt, like a car accident or sum, and this person is the first to visit you. They view as someone self-sufficient and extremely independent so they never get scared that you'll start to rely on them or leech off of them. Both of your goals and morals align especially if you have alternative politics (not conservative but extreme left, marxism, socialism, anarchism, etc.) and you'll be able to talk and debate without feeling like your friendship will fall apart. If this is someone that is romantically attracted to your gender, I really don't think they'll entertain the idea of dating you and even dating in general until much later in your friendship.

5. Right off the bat your most probably going tobget married if not, you'll be roommates for a very long time. This could honestly be a QPP for few of you, the rest I'll think you'll have a family with this person if you're interested. Even if you know for sure you don't want to get married, you will treat this person as if they are your spouse. You might've felt drained at the idea of a family or maybe yours and other ppl's was very chaotic to be in, but you'll genuinely feel like you can do it with this person without it being a risk for getting retraumatized. You might travel a lot with this person or live in a very nature filled area. I'm not getting much so I guess you don't really need to know more and I'm really getting this will be a surprise anyway, even at each stage of the relationship, you never expected to feel so emotionally secure with someone else constantly on your mind.

6. You might be connected to pile 4 or drawn to it. This is someone very new, as in you've never met anyone like them before. They either have a very unique appearance they put effort in or they really surpsie you with how deep they're personality and thoughts are. I'm getting for a lot of you, you might think this person is probably just annoying middle-aged person (😭) specifically man but then your talk and you're like woahh I was not expecting that. Their voice might not fit they're appearance either; they could have an extremely deep voice but be average height in whichever country they're from or their voices are quite animated even though their appearance might make them look gloomly or uninteresting (damn you guys are flaming this person during your first impression of them 😭😭) They point out a lot of things you don't notice or just know random facts that are helpful. They could even be a polyglot and travel a lot. However, this person is very stable in they're life, they feel ok at they're job or have a very specific idea of what they want to do with their career. If you end up working together, they are much more helpful than you anticipated. I'm getting for a lot you they aren't nice or super polite but they are very kind and generous. Like they don't smile much but ask them a question and you'll get a succinct answer. (Ughh this is my type 😩) They're very real and I love people like this cause they are genuine in wanting to help you and you don't have to constantly decipher they're words especially in a corporate context. There will definitely be an age gap and possible height gap. They could be almost 10 yrs older than you but you somehow have a lot in common although they are definitely not immature. I don't think they dated a lot or they had one really long relationship that they got out of when they met you.

[dwobbitfromtheshire]

A/N: This wasn't supposed to turn into a ficlet, but everywhere you go there, you are! I firmly believe these two swap genders back and forth. Eddie makes them special pins.

I love the idea of Eddie being the dad, but these two are definitely platonic pseudo parents. They're definitely mom and dad vibing. At one point, they have said to the kids, when asked separately:

"Go ask your mom," Robin would say.

"No, ask your dad," Steve said, scowling. "You never help with the kids."

"Hey, I work and go to school. Is it so bad that I want a little time to myself?" Robin asked.

They continue on with the fake argument until the kids leave them alone. Of course, Eddie hasn't realized that Robin is the 'dad' until Eddie and Steve tell everyone they're dating.

"So, now you don't have to do this single mom thing by yourself," Eddie joked.

"Excuse me?! Single mom?!" Robin exclaimed.

"Uh, sorry, Eddie. Robin is our dad," Dustin said.

"What?! What does that make me?!" Eddie asked.

"Mom's special friend," Dustin said, growling and wiggling his eyebrows.

"That is your pseudo mother and my platonic partner!" Robin said, hitting him over the head with a rolled up newspaper. "Gross!"

"Okay! Okay! Fine, that makes you our step dad and Vickie, our step mom," Dustin said.

"What about me?" Argyle asked.

"You're, uh, the fun uncle!" Dustin exclaimed.

"Yes! Suck it, Jonathan!" Argyle said and pulled out his wallet. "You know, fun uncles usually give out money, don't they? Oh, wait, I spent it all on finding those puppies' new homes. Sorry, little dudes."

"I told you, those were baby squirrels," Jonathan whispered to him.

"God, I love our weird ass family," Eddie cackled.

[southangel]

Hi! How's it going?

Can I get some headcanons about the main four with a twin sibling!reader? How would the dynamic between them and people around them look.

You can choose if they're identical or fraternal twins. 

Main 4 Being their Twin Sibling

Warnings: none

Notes: Platonic, gender-neutral as well! Will be fraternal twins, since identical twins are typically the same gender. A little rushed, wrote most of this late at night.

Stan Marsh

Being Stan’s twin would be fun, I think.

You’ll obviously look similar, but not so similar to the point where people bombard you guys with questions.

You would be the older one, by about a minute, and you would definitely tell all his friends about it.

He hates you for it.

Since you’re related to Stan, you’re also related to Shelley, meaning you both get attacked by her.

Luckily she’s a bit nicer on you, only because you’re friends aren’t as annoying as Stan’s.

You don’t really hangout with Stan and his friends unless they need you as a backround character for a game, otherwise you would be with your own friend group.

Your personalities are very similar, people could probably tell that you’re related by just that.

I feel like Stan would be the type to scam you out of favors, but quickly feel bad then do something in return for you.

You used to both walk into school together, but after moving onto the farm and having to wear those Hemp shirts, it was embarrassing.

You both agreed that two people with Hemp shirts walking together was more embarrassing than one, so you split up.

You would be friends with Wendy, since gossiping about Stan is so fun for you both.

Imagine you and Stan both doing homework together, staring at the worksheet before eventually giving up.

You guys played Terrance and Philip on the TV afterwards, so it was okay.

“Tell me if Wendy says anything bad about me, please?”

Kyle Broflovski

Being Kyle’s twin sibling would be interesting.

Kyle would be the older one by about 3 minutes, but he isn’t obnoxious about it and doesn’t care.

Kyle tends to be the smarter one, so he wouldn’t mind tutoring or explaining every bit of work to you, you steal his answers when he isn’t looking.

You used to hang out with Kyle and his friends, then Cartman started going after you as well even though he hasn’t before.

If you ever get a partner with a stable relationship, Kyle would be happy for you, but I feel like he would be a little jealous since his romantic luck is absolute shit.

You guys are the types of twins where everyone can tell that you’re siblings, and it’s super annoying getting asked the same questions everyday.

Sheila would probably make you guys share a room, and you both hate it.

I know she would be the type of mom to dress you guys up in matching outfits when you guys were younger as well.

You and Kyle would be the type of twins that talk at the same time, doesn’t matter if you say the same things or not.

It’s so bad that some people swear you can mind communicate, you wish.

The only bad apart about being Kyle’s twin is that you’re practically engaged in everything he does, which is really annoying.

“Mom, do we really have to be matching?”

Kenny Mccormick

I think having Kenny as your twin sibling would be really nice.

Although your household and environment at home really isn’t great, you both still make the most of it.

You guys might share clothes, not often though.

Kenny is older than you by 5 minutes, bigger gap than the rest, but he genuinely doesn��t care.

You guys don’t really look alike that much, so it’s only when they realize the last names are the same that they notice you guys are siblings.

It’s a good thing nobody notices though, or else the questions would be a hassle.

You and Kenny would definitely each take turns taking care of Karen, hanging out with her or getting her small things from time to time.

I feel like Kenny sees you as the other half of him in some way, not because you’re his twin, it’s because you’re his twin.

He would take you down to work at City Wok, so that you guys could make some extra money.

You and Kenny both payed half and half for that Sony PSP, using your saved money from City Wok.

You guys fight over the PSP daily, not bothering to make some actual working time distribution on the device.

You would definitely find Kenny cheesing all the time, in the act.

All you do is walk away because you don’t really care, you just hope he doesn’t get into too much trouble.

“Do you like it, Karen? Me and Y/N saved up for it.”

Eric Cartman

Cartman definitely hates you, partially.

You’re his twin, and he sees that as a terrible thing because of how he exaggerates having to be stuck to you all the time.

You DEFINITELY don’t look like Cartman, at all.

Maybe there’s only some similar features, but you should be glad to not look the slightest similar to him:

Cartman would make fun of you for being to nice, than start screaming at you once you become annoying like him.

He can’t make up his mind over anything, and it only makes him angrier when he thinks about how you’re older, only by a minute.

You’re embarrassed about being related to him, but at least you kind of secret information to blackmail him with if he ever gets too annoying.

Liane let’s you guys do whatever you want, as long as you and Cartman are together most of the time.

You guys are forced to become partners all the time in projects and school assignments, and you almost always are the loudest ones in the room because of your arguments.

You genuinely feel that living with Cartman is like hell on earth, and you can only assume he feels the same but with amplified hatred.

Sometimes it seems like he likes you though, it’s weird.

One time you were coming back from a sleepover and he came to hug you, talking about how he missed you sooo much, he made you do his homework in return for being affectionate.

If you ever get a love interest or partner, Cartman is already on his way to asking everything about them.

It’s not like he cares, he does, he just wants to know who you’re really talking with.

He’ll probably be really weird about it for the first week, then get over it and start being annoying once more.

“You took a really long time at that sleepover, now go do my homework.”

[thelonelyshore-if]

Ehehe you know I gotta ask for sfw alphabet for my baby Jay *kicks feet*

Here's a whole collection of fun facts for you <3 Alphabet beneath the cut!!

A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)

Very! They're super physically affectionate, even in their platonic relationships, so they're big on hugs or a hand squeeze with friends. And with their partners they love kisses and cuddling.

B = Best friend (What would they be like as a best friend? How would the friendship start?)

Jay is a super solid friend to have. They’re very loyal and will always have your back. They’re a little less gentle with their friends than they are with their partner(s)–a lot more teasing and also more willing to call them out on their shit. And since Jay’s pretty outgoing I could see any friendship starting by them just straight-up approaching you and starting a conversation.

C = Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)

They're a big cuddler for sure. They like laying with their arm hooked around your shoulders and you curled into their side. 

D = Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?)

Yessss they definitely do want to settle down someday; they're big on family. Jay's a fairly tidy person, but cooking is one of their greatest weaknesses. They typically eat out more often than not; or heat up premade meals. 

E = Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

They're very gentle about it…but honest. Firm. They won't beat around the bush and will be very clear about their reasons, but they're not going to set out to hurt the person, either. They would do their best to hide how much it’s affecting them in an attempt to get a relatively clean break. And they’d want to be friends afterwards, as long as the reason for the breakup isn’t like. Something terrible.

F = Fiance(e) (How do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?)

Commitment doesn't bother Jay–they prefer being in a committed relationship to anything more casual–but they also see the value in keeping things light while they're getting to know a partner. MC is…a bit of an exception to this though. At this point in their life, they wouldn't be opposed to getting engaged after a year or two of dating. 

G = Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)

Oh they're so, so gentle…the vast majority of the time. Which isn't to say they can't be harsh and thoughtless, because they absolutely can, but overall they're quite the softie.

H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?)

Yes!!! Jay loves hugs!!! They'll take hugs literally whenever they're not picky. They tend to sweep you into it, holding you tightly and–especially if romanced–bury their head in your shoulder (or your hair, if you're much shorter than them hehe).

I = I love you (How fast do they say the L-word?)

They're somebody who says it pretty freely, to friends and partners alike. They don't see the point in holding back.

J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?)

Jay definitely gets jealous, but they do their best to process it in a healthy way. They’re polyamorous, so communication and honesty are super important to them–even in a fully monogamous relationship. They try to be upfront when they’re feeling jealous and to move past it…though sometimes that’s easier said than done.

K = Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)

Their kisses tend to be the slow, smoldering type. Something that starts almost chaste before slowly building into something deeper. They’ll kiss you anywhere–they aren’t picky–though they do like kissing on the lips. It leaves them breathless and lightheaded and giddy. They also like kissing their partner’s stomach and thighs. Meanwhile, being kissed anywhere on the chest drives them insane.

L = Little ones (How are they around children?)

They love kids!! They’ve spent most of their life looking out for their kid sister and her friends, and they’re really good with kids in general. They’ve got a pretty outgoing and gentle personality that lends well to dealing with children. Jay does want to be a parent someday, though if it wasn’t in the cards for their partner it wouldn’t be a dealbreaker. 

M = Morning (How are mornings spent with them?)

Jay is used to early mornings due to work, even though naturally they prefer sleeping in. On the weekdays you’d wake up in their arms. They’d hold you for as long as they could, but eventually it would be time to get up and eat a (quick, simple) breakfast. Then a peck on the lips and off they’d go.

On the weekends, they like to be a little indulgent. They only go to the shelter once, in the afternoons, for lunchtime. Other than that, they’re typically off. They’d hold you for much longer on the weekends–take their time with it. When it was finally time to get up, they’d invite you to go out for breakfast. A slow and cozy morning.

That all being said…all bets are off when there’s a search going on.

N = Night (How are nights spent with them?)

Jay likes giving themself time to unwind from the day. They tend to spend their nights relaxing as much as possible–typically they like to curl up on the couch with a book. They'd love to share a relaxing night with a partner–and then share a shower, with bed right after. 

O = Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?)

Hmmm…I'd say Jay is pretty middle of the road when it comes to openness. They don't consider themself somebody with a lot of secrets, but some things–the hard things–they'd prefer to save until they're much closer to somebody. 

P = Patience (How easily angered are they?)

It depends honestly. There are a lot of things about the world they live in that royally piss them off, and they get frustrated often enough. Typically they don't get angry without good reason…but once they're truly pissed it can take them a while to move on, depending on the circumstances. Especially if they're feeling betrayed.

Q = Quizzes (How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail you mention, or do they kind of forget everything?)

Jay's a pretty thoughtful person!! They certainly don't have like. An encyclopedic memory of you lol, but they do their best to remember the details.

R = Remember (What is their favorite moment in your relationship?)

Continuing the trend of hinting at a future moment, since the relationship hasn't started yet: their first date will be a picnic. Of sorts.

S = Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?)

You know Jay is soooo protective. Not on a controlling way, but when it comes to The Horrors?? They'll do everything in their power to keep you safe. And they like feeling protected, too. They want to feel like they and MC have each other's backs 

T = Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)

They'd put in a fair amount of effort!! They're a romantic, and they like doting on their partner. 

U = Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?)

Overworking is the big one. Especially when somebody is missing–they have a one-track mind. But even then they tend to stay late at the clinic or volunteer around town. Jay doesn't like being alone with their thoughts, and this means it might be hard to get them to slow down. 

V = Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)

It depends on the Jay. They both take a lot of pride in their looks, but M!Jay doesn’t think about it much beyond that. F!Jay, on the other hand, has more expectations due to being a woman. She puts more effort into her appearance than her male counterpart, but also does find a lot of joy in it, even though she never feels like she has enough time.

W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)

Nah lol. They’d miss you and feel the loss quite incredibly, but they feel like a complete person all on their own and not even a deep relationship would change that.

X = Xtra (A random headcanon for them.)

Jay swears up and down that they’ve seen wolves in the woods, something that nobody else seems to believe. They play guitar and have a very nice singing voice. Even if they weren’t in Easthaven they’d be a veterinarian–they love animals c:

Y = Yuck (What are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner?)

Jay wouldn’t consider it a dealbreaker if their partner didn’t want kids–not at all. But they’d find it very, very unattractive if their partner was somebody who was mean to kids. Or even rude. In fact, the one thing I know will be a dealbreaker for Jay in-canon will be if you’re exceedingly mean to their sister. They won’t put up with that shit.

Z = Zzz (What is a sleep habits of theirs?)

They have a super thick quilt in their room that they sleep with even if it’s the middle of summer. They claim it’s because they get cold, but more often than night they end up kicking off the quilt and just going without any blankets.

[caligvlasaqvarivm]

How would the others feel/react to karkat and eridan being moirails?

Or tav and gamzee being moirails? or kanaya and aradia being moirails! (I don't remember if you had mentioned them in your re-write) or equius being the auspistise of dave and tavros??

idk I like to explore the relationships and feelings of the characters

haha i'll save erikar for last because it's the funniest one

Kanaya and Aradia are pretty much a no-brainer to people - they're both fairly calm and collected already, so while they are serving to curb each others' worst tendencies (Aradia's recklessness and Kanaya's willingness to stop caring about people she doesn't like), they're really chill and overall not a wholly unexpected development once Kanaya's moirallegiance with Vriska falls through. they're girl best friends. girl married. they confer with each other about who to kill. when they finally do agree on murdering someone's ass Watch Out. Since neither of them particularly need the moirallegiance - it helps, but it's never going to be an emergency measure for the two of them, unlike the other highbloods - it's kind of deemphasized for them both, and they tend to gravitate more towards their flushed partners. also, do yall think about how kanaya fights the undead and aradia communes with ghosts. the spooky wlw vibes

gamzee and tavros, meanwhlie, garners a kind of "oh god, of COURSE it's those two" response. They rank among the two most disliked members of the team, with Tavros's blatant weakness a mirror to many other characters, who have insecurities about being weak - and with Gamzee's facade as the super chill clown at odds with their society's insistence on death, murder, and violence. However, finding true acceptance in Tavros, Gamzee would probably drop the act, which ironically lets him make more genuine connections and friendships with the rest of the team; meanwhile, having the super scary clown by Tavros's side makes Tavros much more comfortable with standing up for himself and asserting his own independence, because if he doesn't, gamzee will probably start killing people talking to gamzee makes him feel braver because gamzee genuinely believes in him and likes him.

dave/tavros/equius is just treated by the rest of the team as Extremely Funny. Dave's friends won't stop giving him shit over it. however, tavros and equius keep getting people who go "nice work" and "congrats man" because a stable and healthy auspicetism like they have is super rare. dave is in hell

pale erikar is definitely one of those things where, once it DOES happen, everyone around them is like "oh god, it was so obvious all along." like, the people on their team were vaguely aware that the two of them were buddies, but Karkat was always privately embarrassed by how often he talked to eridan (canonically, All The Time), and nobody fucking listens to eridan anyway, so for the longest time, their friend group kind of shrugged and assumed they were platonic friends, and any weird vibes they might've picked up to the contrary were just Karkat and his vascillatory too-many-feelings nonsense because he's got such a big bleeding pusher.

In fact, the only person on the team who seems to notice they've got a pale something-something going on is gamzee, but gamzee has a palecrush on karkat so he's deliberately not telling anyone and trying to keep them apart lmao. feferi like unironically notices that eridan and karkat talk so much that eridan has nothing left to talk about with his actual moirail, but doesn't connect the dots that eridan is having an emotional affair (i'm sorry feferi you deserve better HAHAHA)

once it DOES happen, there's kind of a vibe of "wait, really, karkat? THAT guy?" because their relationship - on the outside - reads as incredibly non-traditional. it's implied that insults and death threats are, like, just how they regularly talk to each other (after karkat threatens eridan's life and thrashes him verbally, eridan goes "haha i can always count on you for some good ironic banter, nobody else gets our sense of humor ^w^"), and karkat can basically calm eridan down just by saying hello, whereas eridan keeps karkat calm by saying the most bizarre, hostile, unempathetic shit anyone's ever heard (imagine the "are you like, legit sad?" post). they both have MASSIVE insecurities about appearing weak to other people, so all of their feelings jam stuff happens so far out of the public eye that people genuinely think it never happens at all.

the only thing, publicly, that changes about how they already hang out with each other is that sometimes they'll make out... which you are generally not supposed to do with your moirail. actually everybody on the meteor (besides the humans that don't Get It) are like bro... you two are NASTY. more of karkat's vascillatory, cant-keep-his-quads straight nonsense. Eridan's down for anything as long as he's getting attention, so he's a pretty enthusiastic partner, but then afterwards he's always like "this is why you can't get a concupiscent date :///// you keep doing shit like this w/ your moirail. you have problems"

like that's one of the funniest things about pale erikar imo... it's that 90% of the time it's KARKAT who needs calming down. eridan's always on the verge of a murderous breakdown, but what that means is that he's also really good at hanging on without breaking, and it's actually super rare that he needs to be pulled back from flying off the handle (esp. as compared to sober!gamzee and equius). karkat, meanwhile, is always on a hair fucking trigger, so the biggest change the friend group sees is actually in karkat, who's so much more chill to be around now that his insecurities about weakness are being patched by having the team's ultra-strong sea dweller at his beck and call. and like, yeah, having karkat as his buddy makes eridan much less desperate for companionship with other people, which makes him more tolerable, but he still mostly sucks to be around, he's just less in-your-face about it. so people put up with the grossness of the vascillatory stuff, and cringe of it being ERIDAN of all people, because they're like, well, he's making karkat happy.

[catnippackets]

as someone who’s coming to terms w their own aroace identity, what does queerplatonic mean to you? you have a handful of characters in those relationships, so i just assume you understand the concept since you write it. sorry if this sounds strange, english is not my first language! 🧡💛🤍🩵💙

this doesn't sound strange at all! your english is great :)

well first off, from what I've learned over the years, everybody has their own little definition of what queerplatonic means to them, so my explanation of what it means to me might not be the same as what it means to other people. it's sort of a nebulous concept that can mean whatever you want it to mean, kinda like how nonbinary can mean whatever you want it to mean and just because you strongly disagree with how someone else is using it doesn't mean either of you are wrong

I also wanna say that I've written a few qprs in my day and they're all different! there is no single consistent portrayal of what I think a queerplatonic relationship is, bc each qpr I write will look slightly different and involve different things. but at the base of it all, to me, a qpr is a relationship that isn't romantic but that is still more intimate than a platonic friendship would be. usually I say that to mean physical intimacy, like cuddling or whatnot, but it includes emotional intimacy as well. I also like to imagine it as sort of the aroace version of being in a relationship, but you DON'T have to be aro or ace to be in a qpr, anyone can have one if that's what your feelings are

sometimes I like to imagine a qpr as sort of the halfway point between platonic and romantic; you're not in love but maybe you snuggle or even occasionally kiss like you are, but there is no romance there, you're just close in a special way that you aren't with your friends. sometimes qprs will even involve sex, and from an outsider perspective, look like you're just in regular love. sometimes qprs barely look intimate at all and from an outside perspective, you just look like regular friends. all of these examples are still qprs! because it all depends on how the people involved are labelling it, and different people have different standards for their own attraction. if someone regularly kisses and cuddles with all their platonic friends and that's normal for them, then a queerplatonic relationship might look really different for them, but for me, if I had a friend who I felt comfortable kissing and cuddling with, that would DEFINITELY be a qpr for me bc I would never even dream of doing that with a platonic friend. but also I wouldn't label it as a qpr either, even though it would technically be one by definition, because I wouldn't be comfortable being in a relationship if it had a label and I would prefer to just be somebody's person and know that we've committed to each other without being "partners" or whatnot. I know that's probably kind of confusing but I can't think of any other way to explain it haha

basically at the end of the day if you feel like your feelings of attraction can't be defined as strictly platonic or romantic but they're still definitely there, that would make them queerplatonic, but of course you don't have to use any labels at all if you don't want to. I hope that was helpful in some way lol

[auspicioustidings]

the john and kate thought.. be still my heart!! they’re both already so charmed by the sweet thing that they went to the theatre with and politely ask if she’d be willing to go on more outings with them.

taking her all over, to the most extravagant places and dressing her in only the best.

really, sweet things just deserve to be cared for, and they’re the best people for the job

ABSOLUTELY. My controversial take is that Kate and John have fucked before and that's why they are so good at this. Hear me out though, it was totally platonic in both instances.

The first was just circumstance to be honest. They had been stuck in the desert for months and were both needing to blow off some steam. The second was when Price wanted help figuring out if he could bottom when he first took an interest in Ghost and Kate is a good friend so obviously they spent a pleasant weekend figuring out if he liked taking dick (Kate's strap got quite the work out).

Point being, they are so incredibly pragmatic. If they spot that you seem a little frustrated, their go to is lazy head while getting fed on a Sunday afternoon. Doesn't bother them none to work together, Price between your legs and Kate feeding you bites of fancy snacks to go with the fancy aperitives as casual as anything.

It would definitely take some adjusting to how easily they work together and how casually they treat deep intimacy. They don't touch one another the way they touch you. With you they are doing it out of sheer enjoyment, the times they touch each other it's pure pragmatism. John needs hardening up but you are busy being suffocated under Kate's pussy? She's fine blowing him to get him ready to take you. Kate is fucking you with her strap but needs a little help getting there herself? John will follow her instructions on how to touch her nipples to get her off. With them it's just purely to get results, platonic and not romantic or sensual.

That level of platonic bond means they are so incredible as partners when it comes to all walks of life. There isn't jealousy or competitiveness between them. More than once you will message one asking a favour and the other shows up to carry it out. John organises dates for just you and Kate and vice versa. And goddamn they are so good at debriefing one another, pooling their knowledge to make sure they always know just what you want and need.

It's overwhelming just how quickly they become an integral part of your life. They're not super subtle about the fact they would love you barefoot and pregnant and never working another day in your life (if you protest they will kindly back off, but they're going to continue to make your life as luxurious and comfortable as you'll let them). They'll both propose, get you rings, have a big ceremony. It'll be John on paper because that gives you legal rights in every country so it just makes the most sense, but the two of them are taking you on a wildly luxurious honeymoon together followed by an individual one with each of them.

[starzzmissthesun]

Hey guys, I feel the need to go into more depth about a post I made a while ago because I feel like some of y'all didn't get what I meant, and I see so many takes just like what I'm about to talk of. Ok, so I've been seeing lots of posts recently about bartylus being one of three things; fwb who don't actually have feelings for each other, being ex's, or 'the third thing'. I mean if you believe these things, no hate or anything to you, to each their own, but just listen to what my perspective is of this. I'm mainly making this post because most of the things I see in the bartylus tag are from the POV of those three things, it's annoying to see when there are people who actually ship them.

So for one, I really don't think they could have that romance and the physical aspect without having any feelings for eachother. I mean, think about it. They are truly best friends to no end, they love and see eachother different than everyone else. This is true in SO MANY fics and takes on them, no matter who they're paired with. They already act like an old married couple, so they would eventually catch feelings (if not already). I understand lots of people say that they could, just because its more of a trauma bond and being with someone you trust. I agree that they have been through a lot together and trust each other more than anyone, but I also think that it would turn into something more. Being so close would definitely make it hard to separate and see the line between their physical relation and how they feel for each other.

And my next point, which was what my og post was about, they couldnt be exes, especially if they were in love. The first thing is that they DO love eachother, you wouldn't date your BEST FRIEND if you weren't. I mean really, those two loved their other friends, they knew what it was like to love a friend platonically. If you are so used to being punished and criticized, you would have to be very aware of how you feel about people/recognizing the differences(this goes for both of them). Especially when you think about the social repercussions of them being gay in families like that, but also the way their families are so opposite that they would probably get in trouble for even being friends. They loved eachother a lot and would not just, get over each other. When you have something so special like that and remain best friends, its hard to fall out of love, especially if its not that long from them stopping that they get with other people. What even would change about them other than who they kiss? I feel like every time they were with their respective partners they would catch each others eyes every once in a while and think this is wrong. The kind of love they would have for each other (even if you believe this platonically) would be made of devotion and loyalty and reverence. They couldn't just get over each other, where would all of those feelings go? They just disapear? They turn platonic? No, they would stay, something so intense wouldnt just go away. What could they want that they couldn't find in each other? I mean back to the whole it being nothing more than the m being secret and because they trusted each other, i mean doesn't that just speak to the love they have for each other, which brings me to the point of them unable to be The Third ThingTM.

The third thing is the trope people use for tragic characters that were never just friends, but never quite romanitc. But the thing is, they both could never be casual about eachother, they hold each other so close and so sweetly, especially as a first (last and only) love, they would never let go. @dolcevitaaa26 made a post about this, and also said a big part of the trope is that the reason it's not quite romantic is because it's not enough, there's something missing. But, like i said, what could be missing/not enough in a relationship that is built upon true understanding and acceptance? They couldn't be vague, not with that person SO IMORTANT that theyd keep in their lives forever. And they would, if they didn't have each other theyd never stop thinking about each other. Even if they were Just Friends, they are each other's Person in every aspect. They understand each other in a way no one else could. How could you lose that person? How could you not hold them so close to your chest that you merge, that you are one? They are inseparable, it is indistinguishable where one begins and the other ends. They are definitely unique and different from what anyone else has, but in a way that would be perfect for eachother, it would be romantic if anything.

I mean all of these things given, especially the fact of being something so perfect for eachother, would be put before anyone else. If youre going to have them have exes within your ship, because at th end of the day ship what you want to, don't have it be with eachother. I just say that because the implications of that feel the same way of people making james date lily after reg dies, reg and barty wouldn't get over eachother. It's fine if you see them as totally platonic, but make them platonic, because they are not casual people, they couldn't be in between for each other. And do you reall want your ship to have one of them still loving another? Just some food for thouhgt. I could say more, but this is already too nonsensical and long.

[codywanweek]

How to write aro/ace codywan for the non-aspec

Want to write something for the aro/ace codywan prompt but you're not sure how or you're afraid you'll offend someone? Here's a hopefully useful post to help you out.

Disclaimer:

I, Yellow, am only one aromantic* person and opinions may differ. This post is to be taken as suggestions for possible configurations of codywan being aro- and/or ace-spec. At the end I'll mention some pitfalls to avoid. *formerly used the label ace for 1+ year, so is fairly familiar with pitfalls for acespec characters as well, but again ymmv.

These suggestions are focused on aro/ace people in relationships. The reason for this is that this is still a ship week, but obviously there are also aro/ace people that are not interested in partnering at all.

Suggestions and pitfalls under the cut! If you, an aro/ace-spec person, have suggestions as well, feel free to reblog them on this post, or to DM/send an ask and I'll add them!

Suggestions:

Note: a QPR = queerplatonic relationship is a relationship type that "queers the platonic". There is no defined list of things that need to or shouldn't occur for a relationship to be queerplatonic. In general you could think of it as being platonic lifepartners, but it's not strange for a QPR to be sexual or even romantic as well.

These suggestions are formatted as: Codywan's specific identities and then a (fluffy) idea for their relationship. There are infinitely many options for how relationships work, and you can definitely mix and match between these "flavors". Angst is a bit more difficult to write, but you could look at the pitfalls and use those to go for a self-doubt/acceptance route.

Flavor: Any. You're more than welcome to write a platonic relationship as well!

Flavor: Codywan are both aromantic and asexual and have no interest in romance or sex: QPR Idea: They have such a close bond as commander and general that they feel like they are integral parts of each others lives and continue on like this after the war.

Flavor: They are not aromantic and one or both of them are asexual: romantic relationship/QPR Idea 1; they don't have sex: "basically" write a romantic relationship without sex. Maybe you can write the conversation they have about their expectations in the relationship. Idea 2; they do have sex: ace people can have sex if they want to, maybe they like the closeness of it or that it feels good, but they may not feel a need for having sex.

Flavor: They are not asexual and one or both of them are aromantic: sexual relationship/QPR Option 1; no romance: Maybe they are friends with benefits and do not consider themselves in a committed relationship. Or maybe they are in a QPR and also enjoy having sex together. Option 2; romance: Maybe they are in a romantic relationship and the aro character enjoys the "romantic" aspects just because they are pleasant to do/experience, but they may not feel a need to do these things with their partner. Here are some ideas from another aro person!

Flavor: One or both of them are demiro and/or demi-ace: anything Demi = you only feel romantic or sexual attraction to people you are already close to (does not mean you feel the attraction to everyone you're close to). Idea: Maybe codywan reaches a certain point in the war where they fully trust each other and have gotten close on a personal level and they get an "oh" moment where they suddenly realize they're attracted to the other.

Flavor: One or both of them are grayro and/or gray-ace: anything Gray- = you only feel romantic or sexual attraction very rarely or weakly (below the "average" for allo people to the point that you relate to aro/ace identities) Here you can have the fun "wait this is what you people have been talking about??" when someone has their first crush ever, but in general you can assume suddenly feeling attraction like that is very unexpected and maybe they find it very impractical to be happening right then.

Flavor: Anything! I am not a spokesperson for the whole aspec community and you're more than welcome to do your own research about identities and relationships.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Pitfalls:

CW for implied ace/arophobia.

Note that these things can be explored when dealing with self-doubt and self-acceptance, but please do not present the things stated below as facts.

When writing aro/ace codywan getting together: do not imply that something has been "fixed" about them.

Do not imply that being a virgin is bad.

When questioned about being aro-/ace-spec, do not make statements such as "but I can still love!!" as this throws people that don't love/are distanced from love under the bus. [see Lovelessness. Originally from the aro community, but valid to use when you're not aro as well]

In that same vein: "love is what makes us human" (or sentient in star wars I suppose) is a no.

Another in that same vein: "But I can still X" statements in general get icky very quickly, as it feels like you need to make up for a lack of something.

Don't portray an ace character as "innocent" or "childish" due to their aceness. Don't portray them as not knowing anything about sex by default unless you have good (relevant) in-story reasons for it. (e.g. Cody doesn't know anything about sex because the clones had no sex-ed and he wasn't interested in learning anyway, or Cody/Obi-Wan knows the anatomical basics but nothing further because they were Not interested.)

Addition by @data-plays-viola: Don't portray ace characters as sex negative by default, unless you have good (relevant) in-story reasons for it. Sex negative asexual people exist but the two are not connected (though some may use their asexuality as an excuse, unfortunately.)

If you write an ace character that has sex, do not imply that this is a redeeming quality. Same for an aromantic character that does romantic things.

Note that not all ace people are sex repulsed and not all aro people are romance repulsed, they may also be indifferent or favourable to the idea. (X repulsed is usually being repulsed by the idea of participating in X, though for some it means being repulsed by X in general.) Do not imply that being sex/romance repulsed is the standard for aspec people.

Note 2: some aspec people see a clear event in their past that had an effect on their sexual and romantic orientations (such as trauma), but for most people being aspec is just as random as e.g. being gay or being trans. Do not attach a reason to a character being aro and/or ace without doing your research into people that feel like that.

[isa-ghost]

holding u at gunpoint asking for some of your characterization on q!fitza for amfmn bc so far you've shown them off so well :]

RAAAAHHHHH god this took forever

Ok so like the qpr polycule thing goin on. Fitpac. Yeah so Pac isn't like *officially* part of it but also is at the same time but is ONLY intimate beyond casual friendship with Fit. He has no special involvement with Phil, Missa, or Etoiles. And even tho it's a 98% platonic polycule, Fit still told Pac abt the polycule being a thing and made sure Pac was consenting abt it bc that's just basic healthy poly etiquette. He also disclosed to Pac that him and Phil have done Things(tm) in the past and Pac was like WHAT bc for some reason he didn't expect it like at all. It was very funny, Fit had a blast giving that fofoca to Phil

They'll do anything for each other. They're the go-to for everything. You'd think Phil's go-to would be Missa and Fit's would be Pac, but Missa is so occupied with reaper things that the rare times he's actually around, Phil just wants to spend stress-free time with him. He feels bad that for a while Missa returning finally would result in an information overload and then overwhelmed Missa screaming. And Fit confides in Pac NOW, but before they started dating it was Phil

Besides, the times they're awake and out n about just kinda work out. Two birds one stone or smth like that. Adventures and fofoca.

Also something something 2B2T something something Antarctic Empire. Birds of a feather. Yeah.

I think the above is best explained as like. They get each other in ways that other people wouldn't. Bc some of the stuff they can relate on is ""Unsavory"" to the average person.

On that note, they are unwaveringly loyal to each other and will take each others secrets to the grave

And yet they both keep their deepest secrets from each other still. But goddd they'd have fantastic long and potentially gritty talks about it.

They're each other's safe spaces to speak a bit more,, morally grey, you could say. I wouldn't call Phil very gray but he's by no means pure and Fit is like 10 steps ahead of him on the spectrum so he Gets it and Phil gets him

Fit is very good at rationalizing things and thinking under pressure. Which Phil needs sometimes. Bc Phil is good at assuming the worst and therefore preparing for it, but he has a habit of getting too caught up in the The Worst Is Definitely Gonna Happen and being a defeatist, so he needs someone outside his head (Fit) to break him out of that loop

Ok I'm obligated to mention the flirting. No one's doing it like these two sorry. The back of the gym has seen and heard some Shit

God omg esp when it's just the two of them, no friends or kids, they're the Worst about each other. It's hilarious but good god they can be rated R at each other

Post Fitpac official they toned it down though and godddd they're so good about each other's boundaries punches the floor aaaaa

Also obligatory mention of Fit being observant as fuck. Phil can't hide shit from him, he knows all his tells. If Phil is lying or something is wrong, Fit can tell

These two mfs are the kids in class that always instantly partner with each other when the teacher is like "ok time to buddy up for this activity." The teacher is the Federation.

Their friendship be like "no kids around? bored? ... wanna go blow shit up? hell yeah."

[crookedkryptonitebeliever]

How does Yves react to jealousy? Wether it is him being jealous or his s/o being jealous…. Cause I mean Yves must have his share fair of admirers

tw: cheating mentions

Part 1/2

It depends on how the relationship between the two of you is defined. He knows he has no right to feel jealous if the two of you haven't officially met or you still see him as an acquaintance. Yves won't stop you from dating others, as long as you're not doing that while in a romantic relationship with him. Because that means you would be breaking the boundaries and promises established, there are close to none if you haven't consented to be his partner.

He knows you more than enough to predict if you want him as your husband or a lifelong platonic companion. There are vastly different rules for either role:

If it's the former, polygamy is a no-go. He will lay his needs on the table on the very first day and the first thing on the list is that he is strictly monogamous, asking him to open up the relationship or for a threesome in the future will hurt him badly and is akin to cheating. Obviously, excessive physical contact with anyone else is considered infidelity, though he allows you to receive hugs and kisses from friends and family members that he trusts, and his trust is not easy to earn. No emotional cheating, he does not want you to have such an intimate connection with anyone else. Yves will express his disapproval if he catches you watching porn or gawking at attractive people on the internet, but he can fix that by making it subconsciously 'boring' for you.

He has no problem with you obsessing over fictional characters, Yves knows that they're not real and he sees them as mere toys for you to play with. He has major issues if you try to turn him into one of your fictitious crushes or your obsession has gotten so severe that it affects your life.

Whereas if you wish to remain friends, or something more special but within the realm of familial, Yves would not interfere if you're involved with someone else. Well, he wouldn't 'interfere' to a certain degree; he wouldn't beg you to leave them for him, he wouldn't try to tarnish their reputation in front of you, he wouldn't even cause a scene at your wedding no matter how much he wanted to shoot your spouse dead. Yves would just watch with an unreadable expression, elegantly crossing his legs and resting his palms on his lap. He would still do something behind the scenes if he thinks you're taking him for granted.

Before even dating your current partner, Yves will ensure that he is the person who is closest to you. He will be the one you would call if things go rough and the first one to know of any major changes in your life, good or bad. You would call him for advice on anything, from something as small as changing the wipers on your car to legal advice. Yves will be your safe space and no one can replace him, ever. Not your parents, your siblings, and definitely not your romantic partner.

You're most likely roommates with him, given the economy now. Living in a jarringly rich neighborhood with him. You feel out of place sometimes, because you're probably a university student struggling to get by or a salary worker living paycheck to paycheck. Yves is kind enough to offer you to stay at his place indefinitely with rent that you can afford.

Perhaps you have your own place, or you live with your parents instead. Or frustratingly, you live at your partner's.

Regardless of your sheltering situation, Yves will more likely act like a monster in law. Arriving uninvited, side-eyeing your spouse for not taking good care of you, every compliment about them is backhanded, bringing in meaningful gifts (i.e., flowers, groceries, freshly baked bread, dinner, food that you have been craving) to outshine your partner's goodwill of the day, subtle jabs that greatly bother your significant other but you don't see a problem with.

You would find yourself defending Yves despite his actions degrading your beloved's self-esteem.

The more serious the relationship, the colder he will be towards them. He will not be aggressively antagonistic, but there is an undeniable air around him that feels like spikes down your partner's throat. He is apathetic to temporary flings and one-night stands, though. Unless he knows they can cause grievous harm to you or carry a disease, Yves will work behind the scenes to eradicate them.

Your partner is afraid of him, and rightfully so. Yves warned him once that he would ruin everything they had if you ever got hurt, either due to direct abuse or negligence on their part. The way he delivered it sent a chill down their spine that they will never forget.

Hurting you includes breaking your heart; so your partner can't leave you without Yves skinning them alive. They can't change their behavior to forcefully make you leave them. God have mercy on them if they ever decide to cheat. Yet, they're subjected to constant terror from this man whom you call your friend if they stay. They're caught between a rock and a hard place. If they're just a regular person, they would have gone clinically insane and Yves takes this chance to wean you off them.

Thankfully though, most of them would be scared off by Yves during the dating phase or your standards became so high that you won't bother losing sleep over another person.

There is an interesting outcome if you happen to be with another Yandere. Again, it depends on their personality.

If they're one of those careless fools who keep you captive, kill your loved ones, and only care about their needs, not your happiness; they're dying of "natural causes" as soon as possible.

Those who are Yves wannabes that stalk you and steal your underwear irks him. He appreciates that they share somewhat similar flavors of love for you, but they are pathetic. They think they know you, but they're not even close to scratching the surface. It's laughable as they try to threaten him behind your back, all Yves would do is stare through them. Ten times out of ten, they would back down out of fear, because they could feel the eldritch horrors writhing under his calm facade.

Pathetic, so pathetic. Yves knows a thousand guaranteed ways he could make them disappear by lunch without any lasting consequence, yet his cheap imitation doesn't even know where Yves is at any given time. They can't even tell that Yves is standing next to them at the bus stop, he just puts his hair in a different hairdo and tries a new makeup look. How are they going to protect you if they're this stupid?

He wouldn't off them immediately though, as long as they're relatively harmless and you're happy, he will let them be.

If it's a rich one with non-negligible influential powers, Yves would keep a closer eye on the both of you. They're certainly a lot more dangerous than the first two, but nowhere near as bad as him. It annoys him that your spouse took up a sizable chunk of his library, but it was necessary to find all their weak points and predict the trend of their behavior. They might have an inkling of who Yves is, but he is still an enigma, the information they have on him is either insufficient or false. They're just as blind as everyone else and Yves always have the upper hand.

They generally wouldn't back down threatening him, though. They think they have their finger wrapped around the world just because of their wealth and connections. Yves was young once, he knows how arrogance flows through the blood of the youth. And so did prideful ignorance.

He would let them think they're winning, their immense big boy/big girl powers are sending Yves running with his tail tucked between his legs. Then, when they least expect it, Yves will scare the crap out of them through various methods. Leaving clear-cut evidence that the entirety of their party is actually working for him, having career and life-ending pieces of information, or simply bypassing all his security and meeting them in their so-called surveillance room.

They would find that all their firearms were unloaded and emergency protocols non-functional. Even the ones that no one else but your spouse knows. Yves knows how to fight, he scoffs at their setup for being so primitive. He would even be offended that your spouse couldn't get your information right.

He would dish out the most ego-wrecking insults while gracefully blocking and dodging their attacks, pointing out their incompetence at gathering data.

Yves would let your spouse exhaust themselves to unconsciousness, deriding them for their terrible physique. Then, he would leave, putting everything together back to normal. He left no trace of him ever being there as if your spouse hallucinated the entire encounter. But they definitely didn't.

He successfully sent a message that he wasn't to be underestimated. They have no idea who they're up against and he will be diplomatic only if they stay in their lane, take good care of you, and make you happy.

However, meeting someone exactly like him, though;

It would be ugly at first. Both Yves and his clone will act a bit more erratic than usual, it can go unnoticed by the untrained eye, but between these two giants? It's war. It's their first time meeting each other's match and their first time losing control over the situation.

They would revert to their default answer to anything threatening their ability to puppet reality: elimination. But both of them are too strong to defeat, so they're stuck in this twisted tango.

Yves couldn't find anything on this person. Even if he did, he knew that the information was a decoy to throw him off his trail, are they even a person? Likewise for your (soon-to-be) spouse, who the hell is Yves? Why has their expertise failed them now? How can it be possible that both of them have the same magnitude of verified information on you, yet neither of them knew about each other until you introduced them?

They both can't believe that they misled each other, making your spouse waste precious data space on your close friend that was entirely fabricated, Yves filling up your spouse's section of the library with a random person whom you never even met.

It's a Mexican Standoff between the two. Upon their "first" meeting with you, all they did was glare daggers at each other while they also suspiciously eyed their drink 'prepared' by you. In the end, neither one had their drink go remotely near their lips.

Until they simultaneously had the idea to lovingly send you off somewhere, maybe asking you to help your partner check on the pie that has been baking in the oven downstairs, fetching Yves a fresh cup of tea, leaving the two intelligence-gathering behemoths alone. Yves's lower eyelid would twitch once when he witnessed them placing an appreciative kiss on your forehead.

They don't mince their words. Telling exactly what they thought of each other, they're not kind thoughts. Once that is out of the way, they acknowledge that they're each other's formidable opponents.

They discuss some more and come to the conclusion that they can't take each other down without somehow unintentionally hurting you in the process. Yves's and your partner's tense shoulders would relax a bit when they realize that their ultimate goal is your joy in living. Trying to eradicate each other is not an efficient or smart use of their resources and your happiness is mutually exclusive to the disappearance of either figure.

Hence, the most logically sound decision was made. It was to work together. Every second spent having to interact in your best interest was agony to either side. However, they cannot deny the immense respect they have for each other despite needing to take some sort of sedative prior to meeting, to prevent accidental strangulations out of fury.

You would be in the dark about what goes on out of your sights. However, you would notice how Yves and your partner are stuck to you even more now. Yves's unannounced presence would be much more prevalent and your partner seems to be clingier than before.

Other than that, life would go on. You have two very scary dogs following you around. You are the world's safest person.

[Part 2]

[eleanork-28]

Post s3e6 what happens now?

I am begining to write an 'after' fic which has brought up a lot of questions and speculation that I'd like to share. Yes willmon is endgame but also where do they go from here?

Class 

Money (what are the Erikssons doing with their money from August?) 

The rift between Wille’s elitist upbringing and Simon’s economical and political beliefs 

Wille needs to learn and figure out what he wants his relationship with politics and money to be 

Abdication 

Wille is giving up the crown but he now has to go through that process 

Official meetings 

What is his new title going to be 

What money does he have not has Crown Prince 

The official statement of abdication and handing the duty to August 

Figuring out the PR strategy for this as well 

Wille isn’t free automatically he is going to price for a little while longer while they introduce August more prominently to the public so that the crown isn’t handed off to seemingly a stranger 

They also have to figure out a way to make sure it is clear that this is a choice Wille made for himself rather than because of his very publicised relationship 

Making sure there won’t be speculation that he is leaving voluntarily because the Swedish monarchy doesn’t want a queer monarchy because that would be a media shitstorm 

School 

Where is Wille going to school? And Simon? 

Even with abdication he is still a part of the Swedish aristocracy would he go to another posh school? 

I think not with everything that happened at Hilerska but its also the thing he knows, so how does he figure that out? 

Where does Simon go? He wouldn’t want to go to another rich kid school

Will they go to school together? 

If so what interest will their classmates take in them, how would they maintain their privacy 

Even apart what would their privacy look like 

What would their relationship look like if they do decide to not go to school together? 

Same questions for Felice and Sara because they also have to go to school they are all children and education is very important lol

Familial relations 

Wille and his parents need to repair their relationship 

Do Simon and Sara start working on a better relationship Micke? 

I want Wille to get to meet Micke I think that interaction would be great

Public relations 

Yes they are free but sadly the public doesn’t entirely care 

Luckily on an international scale the Swedish monarchy doesn’t hold much attention but maybe that has changed since Wille’s scandals and then open queer relationship? This is never addressed in the show 

But amongst Swedes especially after abdication people will have a vested interest 

Think Harry and Megan (obvs the UK royals are a much bigger scale but the point stands) 

Like people still really care what they're up to, and Megan and Simon have those similar experiences of being a poc partner of a european royal family member, the harassment doesn’t suddenly stop once you've left the direct limelight of royal life

Platonic relationships 

What is Wille’s relationship with Rosh and Ayub? 

They have witnessed every thing that Simon has gone through because of his relationship with Wille and now they are back together again 

They do respect him because of his choice to leave the monarchy, they are maybe not even surprised because they did witness the “I could be free with you” speech

But do they trust him? 

On that note does Linda? She definitely cares for Wille but she also knows how this has affected her son.

Does Wille have to prove his intentions and himself? 

Can he Rosh and Ayub truly form a friendship? How will that happen 

Simon, Wille, Sara, and Felice have forged their own kind of found family through shared traumas and love for one another, how to Rosh and Ayub fit into that new dynamic? Will there be conflict because of this? 

What does a friend group consisting of all of them look like? 

Other than mega gay

[strwberri-milk]

How about Kaeya and/or Diluc with a reader who’s a childhood friend that had to move to another country and who they originally thought was a boy but when the reader moves back they end up not recognizing them at all at first due to the changes that has happened to the reader.

And by changes I mean the reader has developed large breasts and hips.

Feel free to reject if you don’t feel comfortable writing this.

im going to change this request a little bit!! ive changed it more to just. a childhood friend moving away and then they come back and kaeya and diluc have a "oh no theyre hot" moment also for some reason this is modern au and i have no idea why but it just happened and diluc and kaeya dont hate each other so yeah <3

They both remember growing up with you of course! You were one of the first friends that they made, and the two of them routinely enjoyed spending time with you. You were able to be the middle ground between them both, mediating arguments or just being the person they can rely on if they're having a bad day.

Not only that, but they would do the same for you. Even as young as you three were, you knew that to find people who cared for you like Kaeya and Diluc would. That's why when you found out you were moving you were absolutely devastated. Not having them felt like some kind of punishment that you didn't want to deal with but you're a child. You can't do anything about it.

Neither of them forgot about you. They would talk about you every once in a while, or try to reach out to you. With being as young as the three of you were nobody thought to try and ask you for the address to your new place, or ask the adults to give someone a number to contact. There was never a need for it before after all, and it was too late by the time they remembered.

One day out of the blue the two of them found themselves added into a groupchat randomly on Instagram. They were both ready to just ignore the message when they realise it was your name. As soon as you provided some information that proved that it really was you, they just had to arrange a meetup for the first time in over ten years.

Both of them were incredibly excited, ready to catch up and spend time with you before you presumably left to go chase whatever it was that you were doing in your time apart. Neither of them expected to see you and immediately find themselves almost swooning over you.

Diluc was always smoother and more able to come off as cold and aloof in his adult life. You had no idea how to respond to this man - who was very attractive mind you - that seemed to parry your responses with tailored ones of his own. Any hint of the hyperactive child that you used to know seemed to be gone.

On the other hand, Diluc never thought that you could stir up these feelings in him. He always felt as though you were someone incredibly close and important to him but there was nothing in him that expected to see just how amazing you looked. He knew that he always admired you (and Kaeya knows it's a crush that Diluc won't acknowledge) and he absolutely loved hearing about your accomplishments but

He held your gaze as though you were just a business partner, unsure of what to say to you. You were smiling so brightly and his heart ached at the sight of it. He found himself so easily lost in your attention that he was sure you could tell. However, judging by how engaged you are in your conversation with Kaeya he's starting to doubt that.

He definitely wants to spend some more time with you one on one and ends up giving you his number. The feelings that were coming up in his chest were starting to not feel all platonic and the only way he could determine that for sure would be to spend more time with you.

You were shocked to see how outgoing Kaeya became in your absence. He was always such a quiet kid, clinging to Diluc's sleeves and now here he was in front of you, tits out.

He easily carried the conversation with Diluc, the two of them eagerly trying to tell you about things in their life. Kaeya however was only doing it with the thinly veiled layer of panic that you'd see through his facade and how his childhood affection for you was beginning to grow into something stronger.

Seeing you again after so long was stirring those emotions up again in him and he didn't know how to cope with them. He was trying to cover it up by diverting your conversation to Diluc but that wasn't working as well as he'd hoped since all it did was give him the opportunity to admire you even more.

When the three of you part ways he slips you his number as well, telling you that there's no way he's going to let you disappear for a decade again after he's finally got a taste of you again.