#Or a tote full of my old stuff from when I was a kid. With a letter about why she saved it. But I don't. Not just one.

[nosferatufaggot]

I accidentally watched an episode about dead moms. Bad timing.

Stop hugging your stuffed animal after you're done crying challenge: impossible

[ragnarokhound]

trick or treat 👻 long time no ramble in your ao3 comments but ily

Happy Halloween!! Always happy to hear from you! <333

Please enjoy my final contribution this year, a merry spookmas to all, and to all a boop night:

Halloween night in Gotham always brings out the crazies. The light is still on at this house, one of many in a nice, quiet neighborhood close to the park. The doorbell rings in expectation. As the tradition is answered, the owner of this particular house is nearly shocked out of their skin by the costumed figures on their front stoop. Or rather, by one in particular. "Trick or treat," sniffles a young, wobbling voice. "Trick or treat," her imposing guardian echoes, a beat off. The old rote phrase takes on new meaning, spat out of that expressionless red helmet, threatening and mechanical. Red Hood is on the porch. With a teary-eyed fairy princess, clutching a half-full sack of candy in her small hands. It looks suspiciously like burlap, and it's stained in places, like it's already been used for kidnapping purposes. Best not to ask, probably. "O-oh! What wonderful--" a darting glance from the princess to the Hood, "--costumes. So creative. Not staying out too much longer, I hope? It's getting late." "Making up for lost time," Red Hood says. It answers about as many questions as it raises, but mostly it says back off and give up the goods. Nervously, "Oh, of course. Take as much as you like, dear-- we thought we'd seen our last trick-or-treaters already." The princess's eyes get big, and she looks up at Red Hood, double checking. When he nods, shrugging, as much as you want, they said, she scrambles for the candy bowl. Crisp plastic packaging crinkles by the handful as she practically cleans them out. "What do we say?" Red Hood says gruffly. "Thank you!" she says, beaming. Hood leans in close. "Warheads? Gummy lips?" The gun-toting vigilante says disdainfully. "Are you kidding me with this sh-- stuff? This is bottom shelf candy. This is the dregs from last year. We both know the average property values on this street. You can do better." "Hood!" A third, irritated voice calls from the short driveway. "Wrap it up, we're behind schedule as it is!" "We'll make time," growls the man behind the mask, not even turning to acknowledge-- Red Robin is in the driveway. The severe twist of his mouth is impatient, but softens when the fairy princess comes running towards him, near-full bag held up triumphantly and spilling at least half a dozen boxes of Dots on the grass. "Red Robin, Red Robin, look! Look, I have enough now! I wanna show Greg and Mommy, they'll never believe it--" "Good job, Jenny," Red Robin says brightly, helping her up in front of him on the seat of his motorcycle. He's got a child-sized helmet ready to go. "See? I told you we'd get your candy back. Hood!" he snaps. Red Hood points fingers at his eyes and then at the cheapskate home owner's, I'm watching you, before snatching the last butterscotch out of the bowl. "Keep your shorts on, princess, I'm coming," he complains, climbing up onto the seat behind him. It's a tight fit. "Ready to go home?" he asks Jenny. "Bad guys and trick or treating and magic spells. You've had a big night, kiddo." "Uh-huh," she says absently, seriously studying her candy stash. "Then hold on tight--" "You got her?" "What kind of question is that? Of course I've got her--" The rev of the engine drowns out the rest of their bickering, and then they're off, screaming down the street. Gone, like they were never here at all. Halloween always brings out the crazies.

(For the trick or treat ask game! Send me a trick or treat ask and I'll share jaytim WIP snippets, or new 3-sentence -paragraph fics, etc :^) through the 31st!)

[willameena]

4, 16, 41, 46, 49 and 69! :D

hiiii! thanks! :D

4. favorite chore? i'll be honest, I don't like any of the household chores. but if I have to pick, it's dishes. only washing them or loading up the dishwasher though. unloading and putting away is somehow way worse than cleaning the dirty ones. I have over 100 houseplants, and taking care of them is one of my favorite things ever, but I don't really consider it a chore, since I love it so much

16. where do I go when I need to get out of the house but it's raining? well, it doesn't rain much where I live, so I am a humongous baby about it. I don't like driving in the rain, I don't like running errands in the rain, I HATE dropping off and picking up the kids from school in the rain. I do like taking the kids to splash in puddles though, so if they're getting too boisterous inside, we do that on a rainy day :)

41. what's the oldest thing you own? I love this question!! I actually don't know. I have a few pieces of furniture that are quite old, but i'm not sure exactly how old. I also have some vintage art/post cards, one of them is dated back to the 30s but I cannot remember the exact date right now. I have quite a few vintage vases and planters that used to be my moms, but I don't have a date on them either. I have some books that are quite old. I love old stuff, funky and unique stuff. I would love to know the exact dates for everything but a lot of it was passed down from my mom who used to do antiquing many years ago

46. what stuff do you keep on the fridge door? my kids' art!! and a dry erase calendar, and a boatload of magnets. that door is a cluttered mess, but I kind of love it. it's full of cute kid drawings and they get so excited to put their stuff on there <3

49. do you bring a bag with you everywhere you go? you know it!! I have a silly amount of tote bags

69. what are you looking forward to next week? my kids are out of school, and i'm excited to hang out with them lots :)

[sergeantsporks]

Vee getting into Cosmic Frontiers while everyone else is in the demon realm so she’ll have something to talk with her mom and brother about when they get back!!!

“Okay, okay, okay. Camila is officially on vacation, and Luz has been excused from school absences for the same, the car has been towed and returned, and no one is the wiser.” Vee chewed on the tip of her pen. “What else? I guess I could do something around the house? It would probably be a nice surprise for Camila to come home to a nice clean house.”

Vee gathered up stray Halloween bits and bobs, tucking them back into their box. Extra teeth, old trick or treat buckets—anything pumpkin shaped went into the bin. Vee tugged at her own sweater. Well. Maybe not everything pumpkin shaped.

She shoved the box to the basement steps, then thumped up the stairs to Luz’s room. She surveyed the cots and sleeping bags, and the miscellaneous clothes strewn about.

What if things go badly?

What if they come back still needing a place to stay?

No. She couldn’t think like that. They’d succeed. And maybe they’d come back for a sleepover, but for now… Vee rolled up the sleeping bags and collapsed the cots. Best case scenario planning. She scooped up the clothes, dumping them in a hamper and piling the sleeping bags on top. She grabbed the hamper under one arm, the cots under the other, and went right back down the stairs. First, to the laundry room, to separate the clothes she’d gathered. She’d have to check the basement before she put on a wash, though.

Vee rolled the sleeping bags down the basement steps, then carried the box of Halloween stuff, then another trip for the cots and the hamper. The blankets from the couch went into the hamper. So did the T-shirts that someone—okay, who was she kidding, that Hunter had neatly folded and stacked to the side of the couch.

Vee knelt down to roll up Hunter’s sleeping bag, but stopped just before she started to fold it.

Where was Hunter going to go? Maybe he’d stay with Gus, but he didn’t have a home anymore. Maybe he’d come back. In which case, maybe he should get a cot, instead of sleeping on the floor all of the time. That couldn’t be good for his back.

Vee snapped the cot out to its full size, lifting Hunter’s sleeping bag up. Something tumbled out of it, landing on her foot with a solid thump.

“OW!” Vee jumped up and down on one foot, holding the other. “What the—” she tossed the sleeping bag to the cot and picked up the thing that had fallen on her foot. A book. The same book Hunter had been toting around, Cosmic Frontier.

“Huh.”

Come to think of it, they had said they’d found it down here. And Camila had acted awfully cagey about it. Vee opened the door to the closet within the basement—what a weird concept—and a fake gun, tricked out with lights and whistled, tumbled out. Vee picked it up, turning it over.

Property of Star Captain Camila Noceda read the handle.

“Huh.”

Vee rummaged through the closet, digging through comic books, posters, and a photo album filled with pictures of Camila in full costume and posing with other cosplayers. Some of them were signed by names Camila didn’t recognize, and one, which had its own whole page and was framed with golden foil, was signed with the same name as the author of the book.

“Wow,” Vee mused out loud, “She was really into this. So were Hunter and Gus. Maybe it really is just that good?”

Vee retreated back to the couch, opening the book to the first page. “I supposed I could see what all the fuss is about.”

Star Date… I don’t know anymore. According to O’Bailey, the wormhole we were caught in may have moved us through time as well as space. It could be that we have lost everyone we loved, and that the universe as we know it has changed irreversibly. Our homes might not even exist anymore. Still, I have to believe there’s a way back.

My last weekly report was before the wormhole. I don’t know if these logs will be read by command anymore, or if our whole system is now obsolete, but still, as the captain, I must record what happened. So. One week ago…

Vee mouthed along to the words as she read. She already knew from Hunter that O’Bailey was a clone from an enemy planet—relatable—but she’d underestimated just how many character dynamics and plotlines this book had. Every character introduced had their own backstories and their own difficulties, all of them weaving together to form one complex web of narratives. Even things she thought were a one-off came back later, or were somehow important.

Vee thumped back up the stairs, grabbing sticky notes and a pen. She started writing notes; characters, things that came back, noting foreshadowing, and misleads. The book started to fill up with little yellow tabs.

“Yeah, okay,” she told Hunter’s empty cot, “I’ll give you this one. For a book written in the nineties, it’s surprisingly relevant. Maybe Luz and Amity were right, too, and I should read Azura.”

Vee rummaged around in Luz’s room until she found a blank sketchbook and a set of colored pencils.

We forever love and protect our crew, she wrote, carefully spacing out each letter and imitating the script on the cover of the book, Whoever and whatever we are, we will always be family. Through supernovas, and solar flares, this we always swear.

“Through anything,” Vee whispered. She folded up the paper and tucked it into the front cover of the photo album. She padded softly down the hallway, her footsteps turning to a slither halfway down. She pushed open Camila’s door with a creak, setting the album down on the nightstand. “Whoever and whatever we are.”

Vee tidied up Camila’s books, gathering them into one neat stack. “Stay safe,” she whispered to the air, “Come back home soon. All of you.”

[night-dark-woods]

ID. photo of a whiteboard with bullet points written on it, titled "Stocking Reminders."

Top stock goes in the same 4' section as the stock.

Each SKU's overstock should be all in one spot. (below this point there is a diagram of a shelf with colorcoded boxes, one mixed up and one with the colors together)

Don't overfill hooks/shelves. There should be one straight line of product! If it won't hang nicely that is too much.

End ID.

end of my fucking rope tuesday. this won't stop my coworkers because they can't read but the amount of topstock i found in fucking random aisles today was truly absurd. like we've graduated from putting it in the same aisle 16ft away on the opposite side (annoying but at least line of sight) to putting it in topstock in its unlabeled cardboard shipping box, three aisles away, in a different department.

other highlights of today:

i asked this kid to downstock One Aisle and he spent 3(?) hours standing over there doing, as far as i can tell, nothing. which dgmw i can respect. minimum wage => minimum effort but my man that wasn't even CLOSE to the minimum and you are actively making everyone else's lives more difficult!!!

hardware mgr tried to have someone else (the aforementioned kid who can't even put stock in the right spot!!!) do counts on stock, BEHIND MY BACK, AGAIN. so i started off the day with an argument with him. bc if im not shooting outs regularly enough for you fucking TALK TO ME. and i will tell you what i need, which is you to do your fucking JOB and MANAGE YOUR PEOPLE. and get on their asses to actually maintain their sections!!! i could do the whole fucking store in an hour if literally anyone else did their jobs!!!

got a new rope assortment in from a new vendor, hardware mgr packed up the old stuff for buyback but ALSO managed to pack up a bunch of the NEW stuff with it despite the packaging being a completely different color AND saying the new brand name, so i had to go digging in 15 different taped-shut boxes to find it back.

just some truly atrocious and annoying customers. girl if youre in a hurry that is YOUR problem for not planning. i cant read your mind and i cant give you an answer if you cant explain your problem to me.

got called "ladies" collectively about 8 times today by my coworker who a) does ABA as his other job b) asked me if ozzy was my "real name" and c) said he used to be a liberal but he thinks there are more important things than peoples' identities. we're mostly copacetic now though bc he sees how much work i do and also we've commiserated about the state of the educational system & when he was talking about how "boys and girls learn differently" i very lightly floated the "well, i don't think that's inherent necessarily, you know, like we're raised and taught certain ways to be from SUCH a young age, and kids pick up on stuff pretty fast," and he was like huh ive never thought about that. ill have to think about that. so not unsalvageable! just a particular Kind Of Guy.

they're doing work on the roof and they fucking broke the ancient drainpipe that runs through our upstairs backstock area, so theres like three totes worth of roof-water-soaked merchandise that i have to take out of inventory tomorrow. and everything else in that backstock area has a fine coating of rust flakes from the disintegrating ceiling. and i was paged up there to help sort thru the stock and like. there are THREE PEOPLE here today who actually have a manager title, which I DONT!!! so why cant the three of you take care of it!!! and i KNOW its bc im good at problem-solving and don't really say no and would do it faster than anyone else but god. come on. its putting wet stock in totes.

also in the last 30 min of my shift (in the hardware dept!!! doing inventory counts!!!) my coworker walkied Me, Specifically, even though i knowww they were fully staffed in cashiers and housewares today, to pick up a call from a specific problem customer ABOUT A HOUSEWARES PRODUCT. bro i know FULL WELL you are doing fucking nothing but online shopping on the work computer, you fucking handle it!!! im on a DIFFERENT FLOOR and im busy doing other shit!!!

and its only tuesday!!! yippee!!!

[rabbiteclair]

Lobotomy Corp update:

it turns out I chose possibly the single funniest point to do my first day 1 rewind. about five minutes before shit starts getting weird.

'ha ha we are SUCH a normal company, don't worry about the blood coming out of that robot, that's probably supposed to happen.'

anyway, I like Tiphereth(s) and Chesed. Chesed is the ideal midpoint between Netzach and Yesod. does this mean he's still kinda an asshole? well yeah. but even more than Yesod, you can see how he got there.

look, nothing about this whole arrangement is healthy for anyone involved, I'm pretty sure. sometimes your coping mechanism is a nihilistic detachment from the fate of those around you.

mechanically I was rewarded for my sacrifice of the old employees with my new star pupil, Brown, the kid who wrangled my first Aleph gear and earned the matching EGO gift on the very last trip. it was a sign. forevermore will they be an unstoppable sword-toting badass wrapped in bandages. or until I reset again, whichever.

every bird is a friend, but most of them are pretty concerning kinda friends.

Laetitia is also a friend but I feel like I might think differently if I ever actually triggered those gifts. which I'm gonna do eventually just to see what is inside of them. the amount of work they put into horrible murder mechanics is inspiring, considering how diligent I am to never see most of them.

I say that as if I haven't fed like thirteen people to Singing Machine and then gone 'ohhhh wait shit they had Fortitude IV didn't they.'

although tbh I'm at the point where it no longer looks like a completely unreasonable choice to just chuck a level 3-4 agent in and let it mince them equipment and all, if that's what it takes to end a shift without disaster. One of my friends has assured me that the day will come when I consider it a bargain to feed a 5 to Backward Clock.

The Snow Queen's whole duel thing sounds cool but it's another entry on the list of 'things that sound cool and elaborate but that I'm just not gonna trigger if I can at all avoid it.' also wow the devs really like European fairy tales huh?

I already talked about it a bit before, but the deeper I get in the game, the funnier that Fragment of the Universe is to me. here is our facility full of weird monsters from the apocalyptic ruins, horrible creations from the most troubled minds on earth, fairy tale monsters, and... oh, this one? well this is an alien. like... an actual space alien. it came here to talk to us. a peaceful ambassador from the stars. yeah we locked it up in a power plant. we should probably see if SETI has like... a hotline or something to report this kinda thing.

Violet Noon can suck my entire asshole. that isn't even an Ordeal it's just a 'did you remember to move everyone? no? well say goodbye to the last twenty minutes, idiot' check

You Must Be Happy is so fucking good. like it's not really applicable to your top-tier agents, but it's fantastic for leveling a newbie far enough that they can safely work with He/Waw stuff and get piles of stat boosts.

under no circumstances will I actually keep Express Train To Hell in my facility, but I have to admit that it's incredibly funny.

Schadenfreude is straight up a sukima-onna. Like the whole 'saw somebody peering at them from a crack, starting being paranoid about it, was found in their room with every crack taped over' thing is the classic modern sukima-onna story.

[tracyinpolaroids]

So I realized that my usual response to needing something is “Can I make that?”

Can’t believe I’m realizing this just now. Or maybe I always knew it and just never really thought about it more.

This is coming from reaching into my tote bag and feeling around for my little coin purse that I crocheted, which was squished under my notebook carrier that I also...crocheted. And then I thought about how many other things I wondered if I could make before resorting to just looking for it in a store somewhere.

I distinctly remember thinking if I could make a shelf, create a new handle for a kettle that didn’t have one, a little bag to carry my essentials when a backpack is too much. I’ve made myself a box to carry my softbox bulb, diffuser screen, and remote, coasters for the cafe, an A3-sized semestral calendar that isn’t interrupted by breaks in between months so I can see everything week by week. My first instinct when I planned the 2018 ID exhibit was that I—not a committee or anyone else—could mount posters on foam board slats so we wouldn’t just be sticking tarp onto the walls. And I immediately went to National Bookstore and bought all their foam board.

After years of online classes and being able to teach Print & Pub again, I’m getting back into this old habit. I love making things myself, almost to a fault. It always isn’t necessary, I just...want to do things with my hands that doesn’t require looking at a screen all the time. Which kind of resulted in that sem calendar I did the other day.

I’m meeting Aze later to talk about Print & Pub since it’s going to be her first time teaching it. I feel bad that Ponci isn’t around anymore to teach it with me, because it was so fun being able to last year. We co-wrote content, and had the kids use our illustrations from the birding guide we did a few years ago for the Ateneo Wild. It was like a nice full circle moment for us.

I want to make more stuff.

[chromalogue]

They swore up and down that Germany has real cold and real snow, but it’s been raining since before I got back.  The river is high and brown and swollen. 

I don’t carry an umbrella, because most of the time toting around this weird instrument that interferes with everyone around me and takes up one of my hands and has to be carried in just such a way is several orders of magnitude  more annoying than just getting wet.  But last Thursday I walked to my German class in a steady downpour and even in a distressingly waterproof coat I got so absolutely soaked that four hours later, my bra was still soaked through. I turned on the heat in my office and tried to read Mark Noll with my chest pressed up against the radiator which was a) not comfortable but b) more comfortable than sitting there damp and shivering. 

Then I slogged down to the centre of campus for lunch and a library book, and discovered that the book I’d ordered wasn’t waiting on the main campus, but on another one a few streets south.  And at first I just thought I’d knock off an hour early and pick it up on my way home, but turns out that library closes at 4, so I left four hours early, because although it would have been a matter of a ten-minute walk back up the street to get back to my office, I wasn’t putting myself through that again.  I found this other campus, got into the library building, defeated the Minotaur, and picked up my book, which I had to put into my plastic portfolio for protection, because by this time the ink from everything was bleeding onto everything else.

This was my first time in months walking home during full daylight, and I saw the sidewalk covered in drowning earthworms.  Anytime I saw one still moving, I took a leaf and moved it as gently as I could onto the grass.  Because at this point it’s not like I was going to get wetter.  And then when I got home I stripped everything off, hung it up, crawled under my duvet, and went to sleep.  But this past vacation, if you’d told me that I would be rescuing earthworms in January, I wouldn’t have paid any attention.  Partly because it would have seemed so improbable and partly because I was trying to haul a bundle buggy through a foot of snow. 

My dad’s gonna be fine, it looks like.  He stopped eating at the hospital, but now he’s eating again and getting stronger.  But now my uncle is in with pneumonia and a disturbingly high heart rate.  I know it’s just the way things happen, but it feels like when I leave everything falls apart. 

But I’m paid now, and that makes here much nicer, rain notwithstanding.  I found out I can turn my own heat on, and the store has trout caviar for 4 euros, and it’s like tiny fishy pomegranate seeds.  I got myself Netflix and I’m puzzling my way through Mord mit Aussicht. 

Naomi Novik’s Scholomance series was thoroughly amazing.  Now I’m rereading the old Nancy Drew books, because I loved them as a kid and I want to understand what I was thinking.  And as a holdover from my pre-being-paid days, listening to John Galsworthy’s The Man of Property on audiobook.  Probably says loads about my upbringing, but there’s something deeply soothing for me about a posh accent minutely describing landscapes and rich people and their furniture.  I mean, I gather stuff happens in the book, but so far it’s the aforementioned rich people obliquely pondering enduring questions that are I’m sure important but nowhere near as pressing as “What if I never get paid?”  And it’s been marvellous to nod off to, so much so that after six weeks I’m at part 4 of 13. 

[voidsiblings]

7, 11, 20?

7. what animal do you look forward to seeing when you visit an aquarium?

ooh, sharks, or manta rays. or... it's been a long time since I've been to one with jellyfish, but I would love that too.

11. anything from your childhood you’ve held on to?

soooo much stuff. I've got totes full. (assuming we're talking about material possessions here.) my favorite outfits as a kid, all my Breyer models and horse books and magazines, toys, pressed flowers, basically anything I have a strong memory associated with. when I go through it it's like rewinding the tape and piecing my younger self back together from the old footage, you know?

20. favorite disney princess movie?

Emperor's New Groove because Kuzco is more of a princess than most Disney princesses

[salty-dracon]

I could hear the frog in Millie's throat. There was no doubt she was sleeping when I blew up her phone, begging for her help. I knew she'd scold me for waking her up when I got there, but knowing her, she would also prepare dinner and google legal advice for me. She'd probably start by asking me to write down everything I remembered, which I'd already started to do on my Notes app. My arms already hurt from dragging my suitcase all the way here on foot.

i wish it was over. i'm so tired. my neck hurts. i'm thirst. i'm hungry. millie i want to see you. millie i want to sleep

I stared at Millie's last text to me. "Take the 2:45 from Ronald Rapids towards New York City. Get to 42nd Street, take the Blue or Orange uptown to 72nd"

I read my reply. "I don't know anything about trains"

Millie hadn't replied.

millie please reply please reply please reply

I glanced warily at the station around me. There were numerous people lying on the floor of the station- taking shelter from the cold night air. Among them were police officers- one standing at each pillar. Apart from them, I was the only other person.

I sent another text to Millie. "Lots of police here, is that normal for Newark Station?"

Millie's reply was quick. "IDK". Followed by another text. "Just find a train going to New York City on the boards and go to the right platform. It's like an airport but quicker"

I glanced around until I found the "board" she was talking about. A train to New York City was coming... The board was garbled, and I couldn't read the times properly, but one was coming in sixteen minutes. That was 3pm, on Platform 1. I walked there.

A woman was sitting with a somber look in the ticket box. When she heard my footsteps, she nearly jumped out of her seat. In that moment, I felt more eyes on me. More, more, more. As though I wasn't afraid I had more eyes on me already. As though I didn't already fear the sound of his leather shoes on the tile here.

was he looking for me? who am i kidding he heard me pack my suitcase in the middle of the night, and he heard me leave as he was getting out of bed. of course he is.

"A ticket to New York City, please," I told her. Millie told me to take as much cash as I could, and only use it for anything that was strictly necessary. I slipped the money I could into the till. The woman was shocked at first, and stared at me with fear in her eyes, before she took my money, processed it with gloved hands, and gave me back the requisite change.

As I turned around, I saw an old woman behind me. She was greying, holding two tote bags full of stuff, wearing a black hat that hid her face.

"3pm to New York City," she said, as I walked away. A few seconds later. "Oh, I only have twelve dollars."

twelve dollars? i have twelve dollars. can i help? should i help? millie told me to save my money. she said quit the bleeding heart because i'm in trouble here. i needed that money more

"It's okay." The lady at the till did not look the old woman in the eye. "Here's your ticket. Keep your money." She slipped the woman a ticket with the same gloved hands. The woman took it and walked through the turnstile after me.

It wasn't just the two of us on the platform. There were three policemen- one at the far end, near end, and middle of the platform. One policeman was staring at me, and two at the old woman.

I gripped my chest. Millie told me that if I were afraid, to act the part- that I was currently escaping an abusive partner. To treat the police as though they were the only people keeping me safe right now, to play up their hero complex. It would increase the chance that they would take my side in a conflict.

I glanced at my phone. 2:55.

The old woman was staring at me.

"Excuse me, miss." She had a low voice. I still couldn't see her face.

"Yes?" I asked.

"Are you okay?"

"I'm fine," I said.

"You look nervous. Would you like to sit down?"

I shook my head. "The train will be here soon. Please, you should take a seat instead of me."

"Oh, yes." She nodded. "Are you taking a flight somewhere, miss?"

"No, I'm actually..." I paused. "visiting a friend."

"You shouldn't lie," she said. "Not to me."

why did her voice sound so cold

"Yeah, I'm running away," I gave my intentions away. "He almost strangled me and I didn't know where else to go."

"That's cruel of him."

why did her voice sound even colder

"Miss," she asked, "is there any kindness in the world?"

"Of course," I said. "You're talking to me, aren't you? And my friend's helping me get out."

"No, that's not what I meant." She smiled. "Is this world largely kind? Is it worth saving?"

I sighed. "I'm not sure what to think, honestly. I'm still in shock."

"I see." She smiled. "But you have suffered, right?"

"Sure, I guess." I sighed. "Honestly, I just want to get to my friend's place..."

We heard a loud whistle. The train slowly rolled into the station, and the two of us entered.

Except I did not hear another set of footsteps besides my own. And when I looked behind me, no one was there.

Even the policemen on the platform were not there.

no one. is. there.

why do i suddenly feel so alone

An old woman will arrive at the station at 2:47 AM, she will not have enough money to pay the fare, let her in anyway. She will then board an unscheduled train at 3:00 AM. DO NOT ATTEMPT TO TURN HER AWAY UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES.

[delcakoo]

pity party ₊˚ރ⊹゛p.sh

SUMMARY ! when everyone forgets sunghoon’s birthday, he ends up finding comfort from a warmhearted stranger on the bus ride home.

PAIRING ! stranger!sunghoon x gn!reader

WC ! 800

GENRE ! fluff, slight angst and comforting sad hoon :c

a/n: sorry it’s short, just a lil’ thing for our birthday boy <3

sunghoon’s eyes were getting watery, and he hated that. a lot.

his birthday isn’t a big deal, he isn’t twelve anymore; he should just be grateful for what he has, wipe away his cascading tears and man the hell up.

but as he slides onto the public bus and scans down the aisle full of exhausted college students, old drunkards, and middle aged mother’s gossiping on calls with their kids fidgeting frantically next to them, he can’t find himself caring when all their eyes lock onto his teary red face, pink bottom lip trembling as he sniffles every few seconds.

he makes his way down the column of busy seats, mindlessly plopping down onto the first free one he comes across. and at last, he reaches his hand up, wiping the salty droplets off his puffy cheeks sorrowfully.

god, he was being such a wimp.

before he could beat himself up any further, a hesitant soft voice abruptly interrupts him. “are.. are you okay?”

sunghoon whips his head to his left, brows rising at the sight of soft eyes glistening with worry and concern towards him, despite being a complete stranger.

you were attiring a puffy winter coat and a bright green scarf, one hand gripping onto the tote bag resting carefully by your chocolate shaded boots.

he gulps and wipes his face again, feeling even more humiliated with his current state. “y-yeah, thanks,” he barely voices out.

sunghoon watches in his peripheral vision as you continue to examine him, clearly having an inner debate on if you should leave the conversation at that. he almost began crying again at how cute you look in such deep thought.

you swallow, “what happened, if i may ask? ur— i mean, you don’t have to tell me obviously, but if you—“

“it’s okay,” he assures with a small smile. “it’s kinda stupid, anyway. just.. all- all my friends n’ stuff.. they forgot my birthday.” your eyes widen, heart breaking into pieces at his painful tone. “i mean, i don’t even care, seriously. i don’t know why i’m crying because it’s really not a big deal.”

it seems you could easily tell he was trying to convince himself more than you.

it’s silent for a beat, nothing but sunghoon’s faint sniffling surrounding the bus until you hesitantly reach over, placing your hand on top of his cold, shaky one. your fingers rub his knuckles, gently calming his distress with comforting glances.

sunghoon didn’t realise how touch starved he was; throat getting clogged as he bites his lip to prevent letting out another pitiful sob, watching the way your touches feather him as if he were a fragile vase.

suddenly, you speak up again rather confidently. “can i give you my number?”

he chokes, looking back up with widened eyes. “w-what?”

“so we can make a plan for tomorrow,” you explain. “for your birthday.”

you, a complete stranger that had just met him on probably one of the worst days of his life, wanted to celebrate his birthday with him? tomorrow?

before he can stop to think, he’s already pulled his phone out, dropping it into your grasp mindlessly as you begin making a new contact. sunghoon peers closely as you type in your name with a bus and crying emoji next to it, letting out a chuckle of disbelief.

at the sound of laughter you look up, grinning proudly once you finally see his fanged smile. “you’re going to have the best birthday ever tomorrow…?” you look at him in question.

“sunghoon.”

“well sunghoon, i’m a master at baking cakes, specifically birthday cakes with chocolate fudge,” you declare, wiggling your eyebrows playfully.

sunghoon doesn’t even like chocolate.

but at that moment he decides it’ll be his new favourite flavour in the world.

as he opens his mouth to reply and show his gratitude, the bus driver boisterously announces the next stop.

“shit,” you mutter, frantically standing up from your seat. “i’m so sorry, i wish i could’ve stayed with you longer, but this is my stop.” your face reflected genuine affliction; not wanting the poor boy to be alone just as he was for the rest of his special day.

sunghoon shakes his head, “no, no it’s fine. you- you already made me feel way better.”

your face brightens a bit, nodding as you achingly wave goodbye. “see you tomorrow.” you turn away, walking right to the front of the bus, tote bag hanging on your shoulder and wooly green scarf still tightly around your neck.

it felt like a last goodbye, like everything was in slow motion watching you leave him, even though he’d be seeing you tomorrow.

but right before you descend down the stairs, you gasp, turning around and making the other passengers frown in annoyance as you block their way.

“hey sunghoon!” you shout across the bus without a care in the world.

the boy in question gawks as you stare him down, eyes shimmering and a fond smile rushing to your chapped lips. “happy birthday!”

sunghoon’s eyes get watery again, but he hates it a bit less this time.

if you enjoyed, reblogs and comments are always appreciated!

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[its-kall-the-clown]

Mk making valentines for everyone is something I'd like! The fluff aspect would be so cute qwq

Happy Valentine's day!! this was fun to write!

Valentine Traditions

Rating: G

Valentine's day was the best in MK’s opinion! Ever since he was adopted by Pigsy and Tang it became his favorite holiday. One of his cherished memories as a kid (really he was 16 but that's not the point) was all three of them sitting around the kitchen table making homemade Valentine cards for his class.

He remembers being covered in glitter, paste, and several shades of red paper shavings. Complaining that he was too old for this 'kiddy stuff'. And at the time he fully believed that. But Tang insisted it be fun and Pigsy went along with anything Tang wanted to do so that's what they were doing as a family.

And the more poorly cut-out hearts Pigsy made, and the more sappy puns tossed around, plus the music playing on the radio and the heart shape cookies Pigsy made...it eventually got MK into the spirit.

So now it was a tradition. Every Valentine's day they would sit around and make fun cards together with lace and hearts and glitter as a family.

Except for this year.

MK sighs and rests his head on his elbow at the kitchen table in Pigsy's and Tang's apartment. This apparently was a big anniversary for them and Pigsy's surprised Tang with an all inclusive resort vacation for the weekend. Leaving MK to glumly sulk and housesit while the lovebirds had a fantastic vacation together.

the delivery boy wishes he could say he was mad at them for leaving him all by his lonesome. But how could he be when he saw the love in their eyes as they packed? They deserved vacation to themselves at the very least. Especially after what MK put them through when he became the monkey kid.

He glances at the empty kitchen table in front of him. Tomorrow would be Valentine's day officially. And normally by now, the whole table would look like a battlefield from a dimension of paper and glitter acting as viscera.

He pushes away with a huff. There was no point in just sulking in the kitchen. Might as well sulk in bed where it was at least warm under the covers.

He kicks an imaginary can on his way out of the kitchen and passes the front door. Where his skeleton jumps out of his skin when the doorbell rings suddenly. Pigsy and Tang were gone….and MK wasn't expecting any guests….so who?

The doorbell rings again, this time insistently and he scrambled to answer it, only making sure to grab the staff leaned up against the wall first in case it was demons looking to pick a fight.

He takes a deep breath, his knuckles tightening around the staff. And then he flings the door open with a war cry on his lips.

Instead of the assassin like he's expecting. It's an ambush.

An ambush of rose petals and strawberries smelling cookies.

"Ah, thanks MK! I wasn't sure I could get my spare key out with my arms full!" Mei, states lifting what appears to be a basket full of paper roses in one hand and a sleeping bag in the other. Upon her back looks like her overnight bag too. She takes advantage of his stunned state and places everything into his arms.

Right behind her squeezes Sandy with his own box of craft supplies and what he assumes is a Tupperware of cookies. Sandy ducks his head through the doorframe with a cheerful 'pardon the intrusion~' before also making himself at home.

"What's going on?" MK asked, thoroughly baffled by his friend's presence at his doorstep.

"We're here to make Valentine cards!" Sandy boisterously yells from the kitchen he can hear the radio there also turned on suddenly and the muffled show tunes Sandy liked, starts to play.

"I don't understand. How-"

"Pigsy and Tang texted us, way before they left for their trip asking if we would take their place to keep the tradition alive.~" she totes proudly doing a little dance in place

"Oh-oh! And look who I brought!!" She momentarily dives out of view and there is the sound of a struggle before she returns with an arm thrown around a disgruntled fire demon.

"Ta-da! Red's parents are gone too so he wanted to hang too!"

"For the last time you putting a bag over my head and kidnapping me is not wanting to hang out" he huffs squirming out of her grip and straightening his coat down like the regal prince he was. MK knows Mei well enough to not be certain if he was joking about the bag on his head. Seems like a legit action she would commit.

"Well your already her sooOOO" she pushes the demon through the doorway, he trips over the threshold and lands against MK's waiting for chest and arms. She skips by with a wink leaving the sputtering demon to hiss while MK tries to let his brain catch up with the situation.

He steadies Red Son in his arms and for a second he thinks he imagined a dusting of blush on his ears.

The fire demon clears his throat and takes a step back creating distance between them while MK also tried to hide his blush.

Curse Mei and her ability to hold alcohol better than him. He always spilled embarrassing secrets (like his crush on Red son) while drunk and she always remembered the next day.

"Do you have tea in this dump?" Red Son huffs with a nose to the air. MK chuckles and puts a hand on his shoulder leading him in.

"We got more than that~"

----------

An hour later the kitchen table is a battle zone. All manners of craft supplies, including Sandy's pastels and watercolors, were spread across the expanse of the table (and some on the floor.)

Tea was brewed, and MK got into the liquor cabinet to add it into his herbal drink. His chest felt light after the second drink and he's certain he's got flushed cheeks from the burning liquid. Red is sporting a similar flush across his face, his movements a little more dramatic and fluid. Even his fiery attitude seemed to mellow out and he even made some half-hearted Valentine cards.

Everyone was having a grand time and even at some point, Red leaned against MK's shoulder with a whine, complaining that MK's cards looked better than his. He also demanded that MK help him in a slurred state. Sandy and Mei had already finished and migrated to the living room to drink and eat more cookies together.

MK agreed to help, with a giggle leaning into his space to help hold lace down while the demon glued it down. Their fingers brushed a few times leaving MK a blushing mess.

He's glad he has the alcohol to blame at least for the added color in his cheeks

"Looks good!" MK declares when the red heart with flaming glitter that spelled out 'hot' was completed. They tried to put a 'your hot' but found Red was lacking the skills and coordination to spell that out in glue. So they just went with 'hot'. Honestly, MK found it hilarious.

Red Son raised it up over his head to examine it like it was a counterfeit bill. His tongue stuck out the side a bit as the cogs of his brain finally caught up. A wide smile spreads across his face and he nods proudly.

"It's perfect. Superb to all valentinessss!" He declares with a small hick. He then holds it out to MK with a swaying body. MK feels like maybe the alcohol on his own system was affecting him because it took him a full minute to realize Red was giving it to him.

"F-for me?" MK asked, blushing and shifting in his seat.

Red Son frowns and starts to retract his hand. "If you don't want it-"

"No!" MK snatches it out of Red's hand before he can change his mind.

"No, I want it." MK reiterates hiding his face behind the poorly made card.

Red son extends his open palm and waits. "Now give me mine." He demands with a frown on his face that reminded MK of a pouting toddler. MK honestly didn't make Red one. Thinking he had no feelings for him he tried to avoid the embarrassment of rejection.

But Red is still waiting with his drunk buzzed-out face.

MK thinks fast and places his hand into Red's, lacing their fingers together.

"This is mine…" he mutters with a blush. The demon examines where their hands are connected and then nods, seeming satisfied.

"A fair trade. I will treasure it." He brings the hand up to his mouth and places a drunken kiss on it. MK doesn't think he can get any redder. Even the cardstock paper and tissue roses can't compare to him.

"Hey! Tang and Pigsy are on the phone!!" Mei announced, skidding into the kitchen from the living room with her phone up. "Come say hi dorks!"

She exits just as quickly, either completely missing the fact Red Son and MK were holding hands, or she simply doesn't care to point it out.

With great regret, the demon removes his hand from MK's and he misses the burning heat instantly. With a wobble and MK's help, they make it back into the living room. Mei has her phone propped up against some books while everyone crowds into the video call.

Pigsy and Tang already have leis around their necks and wear those corny matching couple shirts.

One says "if lost, return to Pigsy" with a cartoon pig underneath. And funnily enough, Pigsy's says "no returns or exchanges".

"Dad! Dadsy!" How's your trip?" MK excitedly sits between Mei and Red, the demon leaning into his side.

"It's been fantastic! The island is so beautiful~" Tang croons leaning onto Pigsy's shoulder, a fruity cocktail in hand and coconut shrimp in the other. They seemed to be living their best life judging by how relaxed they both look.

"Sorry, you had to do our family tradition without us kid," Pigsy speaks and MK shakes his head quickly.

"Don't be. I've had a lot of fun today!" And he meant that too. Today was perfect. And even if his dads weren't here at least he had a good time.

"Don't have too much fun," Pigsy states with a click to his jaw, eyes growing suspicious at the demon that seemed attached to MK's side. MK chuckles and blushes a little, not helping his case.

His cheeks hurt from how hard he's smiling when he answers, his chest full of joy and love.

"No promises~"

[dourpeep]

OKAY time for a college au!!

You 3 know each other from before college

You and kazuha were seating next to each other during your first year of high school you became close enough to greet each other whenever you guys pass by each other

And you and Xiao were best friends from kindergarten to 2 grade but unfortunately you had to move suddenly you two tried to keep contact but the two of you made new friends and kinda lost contact with each other

So when you go to college you meet kazuha at the front desk when you're trying to get your schedule and yall are like "omg I'm so happy to see someone that I know here!" and when you guys check your schedules it turns out that the two of you have the same class during the first period

And you're like "we've got 30 minutes wanna go grab a cup of coffee and get lost together?" and kazu knows that you playfully flirt with your friends so he jokingly says "are you asking me out for a date? Because if you are then I accept!" and you guys talk on the way to class and the two of you barely make it on time

Class ends and you're sad to say goodbye to the only person you know on campus but then all of a sudden he hits you with a "by the way can I have your number?" so you two exchange numbers

Later you're going to your last class and it turns out that this class doesn't have many people you go sit in the back and someone comes up to you and is like "can I sit next to you? " you say yes obviously

But the thing is... there is something very familiar about this guy and you just can't put your finger on it so you kind of stare at him without realizing it

Of course he noticed how hard you've been staring at him and turns around and is like "what? Is there something on my face?" that's when it finally clicks

And you're just like "XIAO??! IS THAT REALLY YOU?!!" but the teacher comes in so you two can't really talk

But the moment class ends you tell him who you are and take a few minutes to catch up

Though I say catch up it was mostly you teasing him saying shit like "I can't believe the shy kid who used to tear up whenever his turn on the swing was taken would grow up to be this handsome!" (he's starting to think that maybe he should have sat somewhere else)

So you're like "hey how we go actually catch up I've got some coupons for this café I went to this morning with a friend"

He doesn't have a reason to say no so he just accepts the invitation

When you guys get there who do you meet? KAZUHA! This man actually works there!

When you see him you're like "kazuha why didn't you tell me that you work here?" but he pretends not to know you and is like "oh? Well who might this fine customer be?" you can tell he's joking by the way he's trying not to laugh so you decide to play along

Poor Xiao is starting to regret coming with you (but don't worry he got 2 plates of almond tofu as an apology)

-no primogems (I'll make another part later where you 3 become roommates)

YES I ABSOLUTELY LOVE THIS-

dhfaeiahe I realize now that I should've just posted this as is since I wasn't planning on adding to this but might as well add in some thoughts I've had about this lovely trio eh??? tbh I didn't add much I just slipped in a few little things hehe

Can you guess the roomates?? Also the bio professor is Albedo ehe

Anyway!!

Considering it's the first semester of college, you haven't yet decided on your major. Luckily, you have quite a few general education classes to take, so you register all in one night.

You'll have the time to figure it all out as time goes by, no?

The rest of summer is spent juggling moving into the campus' dorms, working, and keeping up with some friends from high school. While you've kept contact with a few friends, you definitely kicked yourself in the ass for forgetting to ask Kazuha for his number...how could you forget one of your best friends?

But, you suppose that he's far off in a whole other city with his wish to experience more. You can't help but wonder what he's up to.

Then, the first day of classes starts.

How did you not figure out where everything is first? Instead of moping, you trudge to the administrative building early to ask for directions and, even better, a map of the large campus.

Instead, you find a familiar head of cream-colored hair.

Immediately, you gasp and he turns around in confusion, only for a soft smile to spread over his features. It's only been a summer but it's a relief to see that you know another person. Comparing schedules, he points out that you both have Communications 1301 together.

For once, you're glad you have to take these mandatory courses...

But with an abundance of time (as Kazuha just so happens to know where the class is), he accepts your jokingly firtatious proposal to head to the cafe just across campus to grab a morning drink.

It's hardly been long since you've last spoken to him, but there's still so much to talk about! It turns out he opted to rent out a small studio apartment just a few blocks away from campus! Naturally, he invites you over sometime.

He's also admitted that he decided to major in English--something you're not surprised to hear. After all, Kazuha's a natural at the subject, exceeding the assignments and always so eloquent.

If you recall correctly, he used to tote around a little notebook full of little musings and poetry during high school. You wonder if he still does that.

You talk about how you've just moved into the dorms a week ago, how you're lucky to be rooming with two musically inclined (if not a bit rowdy) people. You're sure that he'd take a liking to them once everything is calmed down a bit. Kazuha just raises a brow in half-doubt.

Before you know it, it's been an hours and, to your horror, your first class starts in five minutes. Not to mention that it was back closer to the admin building and you were on the opposite side of campus.

But it's still fun, Kazuha laughing as you jolt up and tug him to stand, the two of you running to get to class on time. With heaving breaths and flushed faces, you make it just a few minutes late. Luckily, your professor didn't mind because it was the first day...

Following class, you have to make your way to Bio 1301, Kazuha having a major-specific English course to get to. Before you can speak, though, he offers his phone to you. It's newer than his old flip phone you'd tease him about all the time, the screen clean save for a few stray fingerprints.

After you put in your number, he beams and quickly sends you a call so you can have his too.

"Call me after you're done with classes, alright?"

You promise to and the two of you set off.

Biology proves to be uneventful, a full hour and a half of the (rather attractive) professor going over what to expect as well as passing out lab waiver forms. A necessary precaution, he said with a reserved sigh. You wonder what happened.

When the hour ends, you have some time before World History, followed by a Trigonometry course.

By the time you find your trig class, most of the seats are already taken, making that feeling of dread fill the pit of your stomach. Nothing is worse than being forced to take whatever seat is left. But, noticing a seat by the windows, it's not so bad.

You're in the back, though, settling your bag beneath your chair and picking out a pen and schedule book.

At some point, someone walks in and asks if the seat in front of you is taken. You don't bother to look up long as you fish out a notebook, letting him know it's free.

As class goes on, you realize that the guy in front of you most likely hasn't been paying attention. Considering that the professor has been rehashing stuff from Algebra...you're not surprised. But something about his dark hair catches your eye. Not to mention his striking gold eyes...hm.

It's not until you catch his profile as he stares out the window that it clicks.

"Xiao."

His eyes dart to look at you, a confused look washing over his face. You repeat his name.

"Yes?"

Part of him is just about ready to leave as recognition floods your expression, smile wide. How could you possibly---

"I can't believe the shy kid who used to tear up whenever his turn on the swing was taken would grow up to be this handsome!"

The tips of his ears turn red fast, something that you remember very well about him, and his gaze quickly flicks over to the professor still dragging on. When gold settles back on you, they're practically begging for you to lower your voice.

"It's been forever--I can't believe that you-"

"If you're going to talk, do it outside of class."

Ah. Oopsie.

Time seems to drag on while you buzz in your seat, excited to see your childhood friend after loosing contact. You've missed him over the years, always wondering what happened to him, how he's been. And finally, when class ends, he gets up and waits for you.

Naturally, you want to catch up, so you invite him to go to the cafe with you for a late lunch.

"You still like almond tofu right? It's all you used to eat when we were little." Laughing, you nudge his shoulder and the color returns to his cheeks as he mumbles a yes.

When you step into the cafe, a familiar voice greets you.

"If I knew a cute customer would be coming, I would've gone on break."

Kazuha leans on the counter, mirth in his eyes and you gasp. It makes sense now, why he's so well acquainted with the campus and why he'd already known what to order when you arrived for drinks-

"What can I get for you today?"

"Your number."

Xiao's face pales at the blatant flirting, wondering if he should've just declined the invitation to the cafe until the two of you burst into laughter. Though, it's hardly better.

"Sorry, sorry- This is Kazuha, one of my friends from high school. Kazuha, this is my childhood best friend Xiao."

With a day so filled with nice coincidences, you doubt that life can get any better than this.

Oh, how wrong you'd be.

[surejess--arc]

@forwardintros​

( margot robbie, cis woman, she/her ) — Look who it is! If you take a look at our database, you’ll find that JESSICA “JESS” TURNER is a THIRTY-TWO year old STAND-UP COMEDIAN that’s been in Chicago for SIXTEEN YEARS. According to the file, they’re a mutant on LEVEL THREE with the power of CLOWN PHYSIOLOGY. That must be why they’re THEATRICAL and NONSENSICAL. If you ask me, they remind me of unearned laughter over a killing joke, a permanent stepford smile, mars opportunity’s last message. They are affiliated with BARNUM ODDITIES + HELLFIRE CLUB.

could i leave her behind ? ...too silly to leave behind !

QUICK FACTS

full name: jessica mary “jess” turner

name reasoning: ...jess tur.

date of birth: february 24th, 1990

zodiac big three: pisces sun, sagittarius moon, gemini rising

gender & pronouns: cis woman & she/her

sexual orientation: bisexual

ethnicity: white

nationality: american

languages spoken: english (5)

enneagram: 7w6

mbti: enfp

temperament: sanguine-melancholic moral alignment: chaotic neutral

ability: clown physiology

affiliation: barnum oddities & the hellfire club ( co-founder )

alias: n/a

BACKSTORY

triggers: being sold to carnies?, kidnapping, torture, a white guy complaining because he was fired from the cool torture factory 🙄

jessica was born in brooklyn to two non-mutant parents ( why are all of my muses’ parents non-mutants ). one eye had a pink iris, she was notably paler than other children ( but not to the point of ‘oh my god, is that krusty the clown?’ ) and her hair grew rather odd – naturally platinum blonde, bordering on white, with different colors and slightly redder lips. but her parents always just assumed that the babysitters were harmlessly fucking around with hair dye when they were out. come to think of it she probably just looked albino with a dash of makeup and hair dye ahfdouiladjns

her parents never expressed much of an opinion on the mutant situation, seeming to be impartial parties – very ‘well, as long as they aren’t hurting anyone, it’s fine.’ and that was true! they really didn’t care! they were totes chill! …so long as it applied to anyone but family.

that isn’t to say when jess first just… pulled a card out of thin air, they were like ‘oh my god, sin!’ – hell, they thought it was just a magic trick! but as things like that continued, and as she lost babysitters but kept that strange-ish look with the quite red lips… they were like ‘this is getting weird. she looks like an e-girl, only those don’t exist yet, so she looks like a clown™. i have an idea. let’s send her to boarding school so we don’t have to deal with maybe having a mutant daughter and having to help her with this weird stuff. ugh.’

but, lol, they just said it was a boarding school. they actually found a group of carnies that they… essentially sold her to. obviously she was quite taken aback and hurt at first, but the carnies proved to be very caring – more caring than her parents had ever found it in themselves to be. they taught her so many useful things! like conning, how to fake your death, acrobatics… really all over the board! who needs a typical schooling system when you can just have carnies?! they also took most of her ‘powers’ as talents, natural gifts. hell, they actually did have a few mutants traveling along with them! a wolf woman who just functioned as their bearded lady, a kid with lobster physiology under control enough to just make him look like he had lobster hands, an old man with unicorn physiology under control enough to just show the horn. and, because of the title of the attraction they sat in – ‘freak show’ – everyone just assumed all of the oddities were deformations. it was a safe place. and jess fit in well with her intuitive clown magic.

also i would be aghast to not mention the presence of cordelia yildiz, a genuine connection who she made the mistake of losing, but i wrote this intro over a year ago and i’m trying to make as few changes as possible bc i’m lazy afldskfs

but, as she grew, it became apparent that her differences stretched beyond physical and sleight of hand. yes, she was a natural at cards, juggling, balloon animals, and she was funny! even the things that were maybe .2% funny generated so much laughter and joy! which… they didn’t recognize as a problem…

until she was fourteen. something unexpected happened: one of her jokes – a bad one, a lame ‘chicken crossed the road’ spin – made patrons laugh so hard that they were breaking ribs, gasping for air, and being driven mad by the hilarity. three died, all the others were sent to the hospital. some never left the psych ward.

and something similar happened… and, for as much as the carnies dearly loved her, when she began showing signs that her simple power was actually quite dangerous, they decided that the best plan of action was to keep her at bay whilst they looked for someone or something who/that could teach her. but, before they had the chance to find someone, disgraced ex-ammo scientist william barnum had the chance to find her.

people came and went. with the circumstances, it was concerning... but trying to find someone who easily could’ve just run off wasn’t worth risking themselves for. a week later, the circus marched forth, none the wiser !

barnum & co. presented as respectable individuals. despite his method of kidnapping, it seemed almost pristine at first... then you get shoved inside and find that you’re essentially in a glorified warehouse, surrounded by scientists who did not meet kappa standards or were too impatient to so much as try. thus, think of it like this: kappa’s bear traps are new, shiny, sharp ; barnum’s bear traps are rusted, infested, blunt and in need of chopping.

then the experiments began. and how fascinating they found this ability! how innocent it seemed with its stupid card and balloon tricks, but how threatening it was with its bombs and killing jokes (reference intended). the last thing they expected was for little carnie clown girl to be a real threat! even with the nullifying extracted gene used between experiments, they absolutely gagged her up <3 just gave her a little notebook because they aren’t completely evil <3 over a decade of being able to talk for maybe 30mins a day (just to make sure she still can when need be) and people would WONDER why she has so much to say <3

that said, she likely seemed very quiet to her peers… which she was naturally rather not. it is In Her DNA™.

I ALSO JUST REALLY WANT TO ADD THAT SOME OF THE EXPERIMENTS WERE LIKE. TERRIBLE. BUT THERE’S ON THAT’S JUST REALLY FUNNY IN CONCEPT. LIKE ESSEX HOUSE SETTING UP A WHOLE SLAPSTICK STAGE AT ONE POINT. TO TEST PAIN SUPPRESSION. LITERAL CLOWNERY.

(that said, they were most interested in her brain, limbs/digits, tongue/teeth, and skin……… so do with that information what you will)

other experiments were performed, each worse than the last, and her will was all but broken.. she was barely able to speak, barely able communicate – what was the point in trying? in hoping?

but after a new sub-ability made itself known - miming - and they decided to have fun hacking away at limbs?? SHE WAS READY TO MAKE SOME PLANS AND SPREAD THEM AROUND. (escape can be plotted out ofc! just keeping this sentence from the intro bc im too lazy to change anything i dont absolutely need to!)

getting that gag off, she wasted absolutely no time in letting some of those brilliant scientists finally hear her brilliant jokes! literally laugh themselves to death!

for some months after the escape, she was a classic sad clown, having no CLUE what she was supposed to do. believe it or not, for a whole month, she was even struggling with speech! (i have like… a whole thing about why she talks so much outside of the general ‘she’s a clown’ in my head it’s actually quite sad clown pls do ask if u wld like to hear)… then she saw an ad for an open mic night and a lightbulb appeared over her head! suddenly having the ability to talk for more than fifteen minutes, a day she could be a stand-up comedian… because even when she wasn’t funny, apparently she was really fucking funny! that said, she just uses the pseudonym ‘jester’ to draw less attention to her actual identity in the event that the barnum folks are walkin around.

a few months after the escape, jess was lucky enough to meet january st. james in all her generosity. she has since made her way to becoming january’s right-hand man and even aided in founding the hellfire club!

TIMELINE

BORN – in ‘90 with clear differences, but not enough to warrant scare. (bro replacing “’69″ with “’90″ felt so weird)

AGE 13 – jess is discovered to definitely be a mutant; more or less sold to carnies

AGE 15 – one of jess’s jokes killed various audience members, drove others insane, and maimed even more. happened more than once.

AGE ~15.5 – jess is caught by barnum & co, the poor man’s kappa (which was completely purposeful, as william barnum was an embittered ex-ammo scientist)

AGE ~15.5-30 – jess is tortured by barnum & co. allowed to speak for maybe half an hour each day, if that. depends on them to provide paper/pen, but they can revoke as they please.

AGE 30 – a plan is concocted to escape with four other mutants

AGE 30 – jess is free and on the streets. january st. james helps her get back on her feet. finds a career as a comedian.

AGE 30+ – jess is still hellbent on revenge <3 but also helping establish the hellfire club like it’s all very contradictory.

HEADCANONS

y’all know that i’ve come up with a lot so i’ll just include the two that i put in the original intro. maybe i’ll come back one day and add them all but today is not that day!

 her version of reality can now be showcased by lily allen’s ‘ldn’ mv… only violence is still an option <3

also a lil note for her physiology since margot’s played harley quinn in three different movies and, each time, she’s looked a little different: facial features like suicide squad (2016), always has those lil bedazzled eyebrows she wears in birds of prey, color scheme of the suicide squad (2021) ! ( that said, probs won’t be using many ss gifs because there was like… one pack still available ahdlsaifjsk so just <3 imagine <3 ) the one thing i would add that’s in none of the gifs is one iris being a shade of light pink and the other being the regular blue.

OH BUT ALSO A VERY IMPORTANT IMAGE: jess at barnum

CONNECTION IDEAS

barnum & co oddities ! the blurb will be submitted to the channel momentarily ( tl for kappa/hellfire didn’t add up, so original it is! ), but basically the four other folks she escaped the poor man’s kappa with.

kappa runaways ! okay i’m just interested in the idea of william barnum & co having been like ‘fuck kappa... fuck those bitches... they’re so stupid...’ so like. jess is aware of kappa’s existence -- would love for her to meet/have met some of the runaways and learned about how kappa was actually the chanel to barnum’s walmart

hellfire folks ! she does not even begin to look like she fits in in there and lbr she doesn’t ! could make it funny !

regulars at her performances ! yea

violence is the answer ! yea

peer pressure ! yea

see i just don’t feel like typing all of those out again ! but she has been established enough... for tha vibe !

brainstorming. obvs.

[crookedwingz]

Clutter & Materialism

I have realized how much clutter and items both mean alot to me and also affect me in so many different ways.

Many people in my life have been close to hoarders but not quite to the extreme of many hoarders, just in a messy sense, not a messy and dirty sense.

I have created an attachment to a lot of my things (my old art, books, clothing, etc.) because I’ve moved a lot and also am adopted so I’m worried I will forget everything one day and very much cherish especially the things from before my adoption when I turned 6 years old.

I want to be more of a minimalist and I don’t really attach myself to more recent items, aside from essentials for living and such. But some things I can’t get rid of no matter what, like my photos from when I was a baby up to when I was adopted, my gameboy games, and anything related to my early childhood.

I don’t mind keeping this stuff of course, I guess I’m just worried about what people would do with it once I died, though I guess because I’d be dead it wouldn’t really matter? Idk.

My bio grandma collected a lot of trinkets and horse carousels and I would like to do the same eventually in her memory, as well as other things cause I’m like a crow, I like collecting things with meaning to me, especially coins and have been curious about bone collecting.

My adoptive mom is the same way, she would have a bunch of things back then and every time I cleaned, it seemed to get messy nearly immediately and it would take hours to clean if someone came over. It was so overwhelming, but I also had my own issues. I had things I’ve collected over my childhood that I kept in my walk in closet, but it was so full that I couldn’t walk in it. It eventually became a grounds for mice, which led to a mouse and flea infestation, making me have a phobia of fleas and pretty sure I am allergic to them.

Now I’m super cautious about what I keep and what I do keep I keep either with me in eyesight or closed up in totes where they won’t be chewed through.

I’m blabbering on but its just an experience I haven’t seen many others have.

But because aside from maybe fostering and adopting later on if that is something I want to do, I don’t plan on having any kids aside from furbabies so my items wouldn’t go to them. My bio family is full of kids so I could give it to them, but I’m not very close to any of them really.

Idk, its just a thought I’m having currently, not sure what it all means. 

[kcowgill]

Went into the office for the first time in over a year yesterday.

I had gone in ... I forget exactly when, but we were notified that the office was going to take advantage of the fact that hardly anyone was there and do some renovations. I went in a few times to pack up some personal things - some to take home, some to keep in a box for my new desk, whenever that would be ready.

Earlier this year, the facilities department asked everyone to submit a form stating when they expected to start coming back into the office. Not knowing any better, I picked an arbitrarily far away date - August 2 - to return, so my stuff would be ready.

Then delta came up, and I wanted a booster shot before I’d feel comfortable coming in. Well, I ended up getting my booster a week and a half ago, so I decided I’d start going in.

Unfortunately my desk wasn’t actually ready :)

Whomever was moving workstations and such misplaced my cherished keyboard and laptop stand. I’m VERY picky about my keyboard - so much so that I bought the same model (with my own money!) when I decided to set up an actual desk at home in April 2020, expecting that I’d have a nice setup for home AND office without having to tote much back and forth - OR I could just keep it at home and “attach” (it’s wireless) it to my personal computer.

The help ticket that was submitted to order a replacement kind of rankled me - “Kent misplaced his keyboard in the move”. Uh, no - I didn’t. I expected it to be moved along with the computer I left in the office (which I can easily connect to remotely). The only thing I misplaced was my trust.

I also discovered that my new work laptop - a fancy Mac with the M1 chip - can only support a single external monitor, not the two I was accustomed to pre-pandemic. So my setup was all wrong.

I spent a fair amount of time trying to get my setup back to how I liked it, but I also had some impromptu chats with people I haven’t seen either ever or in over a year. It was nice to people again, but I’m glad I still have the freedom to work from home several days a week. I’m not ready to people full time again. Not yet.

I wanted to go in today. I tried to go in today. I could catch a commuter train at 7:55 to arrive downtown at 8:20 which would give me enough time to walk to the office, plug in, and be there for an 8:30 meeting. But the commuter train didn’t cooperate, it was late. I didn’t think it would arrive soon enough to get me downtown and not be late for my meeting (I hate being late) so I punted and came back home.

One thing for sure - I have fallen out of the habits required for me to get to work at my old time. There’s an earlier train I could take and not worry about missing early meetings, but I’d have to get up earlier to take care of kids + dogs. My mornings have really changed a lot - I hope I can get back into my old habits!