#Open Toilet 🚽

[xtruss]

Mount Everest: Climbers Will Need To Bring Poo 💩 Back To Base Camp ⛺️

— By Navin Singh Khadka | BBC World Service | Wednesday February 7, 2024

Many Mountaineers use open spaces as toilets on the higher camps of Everest

People climbing Mount Everest will now have to clear up their own poo and bring it back to base camp to be disposed of, authorities have said.

"Our Mountains Have Begun To Stink," Mingma Sherpa, Chairman of Pasang Lhamu Rural Municipality, told the BBC.

The municipality, which covers most of the Everest region, has introduced the new rule as part of wider measures being implemented.

Due to extreme temperatures, excrement left on Everest does not fully degrade.

"We are getting complaints that human stools are visible on rocks and some climbers are falling sick. This is not acceptable and erodes our image," Mr Mingma adds.

Climbers attempting Mount Everest, the world's highest peak, and nearby Mount Lhotse will be ordered to buy so-called poo bags at base camp, which will be "checked upon their return".

Where Do You Poo Up a Mountain?

During climbing season mountaineers spend most of their time at base camp acclimatising to the altitude, where separate tents are erected as toilets, with barrels underneath collecting the excrement.

But once they begin their treacherous journey things get more difficult.

Most climbers and support staff tend to dig a hole but the higher you go up the mountain, some locations have less snow, so you have to go to the toilet out in the open.

Very few people bring their excrement back in biodegradable bags when climbing Mount Everest's summit, which can take weeks.

Rubbish remains a huge issue on Everest and other mountains in the region, although there has been an increasing number of clean-up campaigns, including an annual one led by the Nepali Army.

Clean-up campaigns have led to the removal of some rubbish, but that is mostly in lower camps

'Open Toilet'

"Waste remains a major issue, especially in higher up camps where you can't reach," says Chhiring Sherpa, Chief Executive Officer of the non-government organisation Sagarmatha Pollution Control Committee (SPCC).

Although no official figure exists, his organisation estimates that there are around three tonnes of human excrement between camp one at the bottom of Everest and camp four, towards the summit.

"Half of that is believed to be in South Col, also known as camp four," Mr Chhiring says.

Stephan Keck, an international mountain guide who also organises expeditions to Everest, said South Col has gained a reputation as an "open toilet".

At 7,906 metres (25,938 feet) high, South Col serves as the base before climbers attempt to reach the Everest and Lhotse summits. Here, the terrain is very windswept.

"There is hardly any ice and snow, so you will see human stools all around," Mr Keck says.

The rising number of climbers means there has been a significant increase in waste on Everest

Authorised by the Pasang Lhamu rural municipality, the SPCC is now procuring about 8,000 poo bags from the US, for an estimated 400 foreign climbers and 800 support staff for the upcoming climbing season that begins in March.

These poo bags contain chemicals and powders that solidify human excrement and make it largely odourless.

On average, a climber is thought to produce 250 grams of excrement per day. They usually spend about two weeks on the higher camps for the summit attempt.

"With that as the basis, we plan to give them two bags, each of which they can use five to six times," Mr Chhiring explains.

"It certainly is a positive thing, and we will be happy to play our part to make this successful," says Dambar Parajuli, president of the Expedition Operators Association of Nepal.

He said his organisation had suggested that this should first be brought in as a pilot project on Everest and then replicated on other mountains too.

Mingma Sherpa, the first Nepali to have climbed all 14 mountains above 8,000 metres, said use of such bags to manage human waste has been tried and tested on other mountains.

"Mountaineers have been using such bags on Mount Denali (the highest peak in North America) and in the Antarctic as well, that is why we have been advocating for it," says Mr Mingma, who is also an advisor to the Nepal Mountaineering Association.

Mr Keck, the international mountain guide, echoed the same message, saying the idea will help to clean up the mountain.

Ropes and ladders left behind by climbers are collected and brought back, but human excrement remains on the mountains

Nepal's central government has announced several mountaineering rules in the past but there has been criticism that many of them have not been properly implemented.

One of the main reasons is the absence of liaison officers on the ground. Government officials are supposed to be with expedition teams at the base camps but many of them have been criticised for not showing up.

"The state has always been missing at base camps leading to all kinds of irregularities including people climbing our mountains without permits," Mr Mingma, chairman of the Pasang Lhamu rural municipality, says.

"This will all change now. We will run a contact office and make sure our new measures, including making climbers bring back their excrement, are implemented."

[meowzfordayz]

when you forget to close the door while using the bathroom

Author’s Note: this isn’t nsfw, but it’s ~explicit for other reasons. 🚽🧻💩 #shitposting #literally

when you forget to close the door while using the bathroom

Hashira x Reader, Kamaboko x Reader

Word Count: ~800

CW: explicit language, poop references

~faqs~

Do you even love him ????? 😭😭😭

WHY WOULD YOU LEAVE THE DOOR OPEN?!?!?! 🫠😵‍💫🤢

Haunted by your little gasps for air 🙃

Can’t take intimacy srsly for a while

Bc whenever you gasp ~cutely into your kisses 🥰

Zenitsu just flashes back to you doing your best to take a shit 😮‍💨🥴

Highkey takes it as a challenge 😏

A display of dominance, if you will 😎

Nods in approval (not that you can see him)

And takes ~notes for later (aka yes, he is listening closely 💀) 

You don’t know it yet

But Inosuke’s already planning his move

Drink a ton of coffee (he’ll have to ask Tanjirou how to brew it) ☕️

Eat a ton of dairy 🧀🥛🍦

Make sure you’re home 😌

Take a shit (w/ the door open, ofc) 🤗

THAT’LL SHOW YOU WHO’S BOSS !!!!! 😤😤😤🫡

King of the Toilet anyone??? 🚽👑

Wonders why everything sounds louder??? 😬

A respectful gentleman tho ☺️

Will go upstairs to avoid the plops 🫢

Too bad his hearing’s phenomenal, even when hiding on top of the roof 😃

A little irritated 🙄

But whatever

You prob just reeeally had to go

He understands 😶

Will nonchalantly ask you about it the next time you’re out w/ friends 🤨

Is getting ignored for the rest of the night worth it? 🙃

Kinda 🥲

Obanai has regrets 😞

Can smell the situation from a mile away 😅

Tbf, closing the door wouldn’t have helped much 😬

Has to contemplate whether it’s worth embarrassing you over

Like, does he gently ask, “Love, would you mind closing the door?”

Or does he wince grin and bear it

Unfortunately, the toilet paper he would use to plug up his nose is currently unobtainable 🧻☹️

Should he just knock himself out for now? 🤗

You’d prob be upset if he didn’t wake up in time… 😒

Hm… 😔

😵 <— Tanjirou inhaled too deeply

“BAAABE, YOU FORGOT TO CLOSE THE DOORRR!!!!!” 🩷💕💞💓💗💖💘💝

Giggles to herself as the door slams shut 🤭

(you’re not mad, but you had to kick it closed bc it’s a lil far from the toilet seat 😅)

Holds it against you 😌

~

“Shinobu, could you get me a glass of water?” ☺️

“I don’t know, my dear, could you close the bathroom door?” 😃

~

“Shinobu, I want a kiss.” 🥺

“Mm, and I want to forget your pooping noises. I guess we can’t always have what we want.” 😃

Chuckles to himself, at first 🤭

And then becomes concerned 😕

Is it supposed to sound like that? 🙁

Or take this long?? ☹️ Should he intrude? 😖

It’s not like there’s a closed door for him to bust down…

He could just, waltz in-

NO

Internally scolds himself: Bad idea, [y/n] would not appreciate that!

Returns to the drawing board

And settles on a careful (once you’ve returned to him), “So, my love, are your bowels feeling okay?” ☺️

🧐😒😠 <— you

😶😬😁 <— him

“They just, uh, sounded wonderful earlier?!”

“Next time, how about closing the door?”

*Sanemi is casually leaning against a wall near the bathroom entrance*

You shriek 😳

And smack his shoulder 😡

“Sanemi!!!!! Do not wait outside the bathroom like that!!!!!” 😭

“Did you wash your hands?” 😏

“SANEMI!” 😒

“... well?” 👀

You are not amused 😐

He acquiesces 😅

“Okay, okay, I confess, I heard the sink running.” 🤓

“I hate you.” 🥲

“But you trust me enough to shit with the door open.” 🥰

“Piss off.” 🙄

“I’m about to!” 🫡

(bc, y’know, he’s about to go… piss… 😆)

Doesn’t really mind

Will prob forget to remind you about it later 🙃

Until the next time you do it

…

By the fourth incident, Muichiro gives up

If anything, he’s flattered you’re so comfortable around him ☺️

Altho he is a lil worried about your ability to use a public bathroom 😶

Def uncomfortable 😕

But even more uncomfortable at the thought of discussing ~it w/ you ☹️

Giyuu knows you wouldn’t be upset

Or even embarrassed

You have like, 0 shame, as he’s both lovingly and unfortunately come to learn ☺️😬

Which means

If he mentioned it, then you’d likely end up teasing him 🫠

“Love me so much, you’ve even gotta listen to me poop?” 😉

*shudder shudder* 😭

(I mean, yes, he does love you that much, but when you put it like that 🥴)

Giyuu settles on hoping that it was a one time mistake 🤞🙏

Good luck 😃

Tengen’s never letting you live it down 😝

Will write out instructions on “How to Use a Bathroom” 🤓

And stick ‘em on both sides of the door

Step 1: Open the door

Step 2: CLOSE THE DOOR

Step 3: ✨Do your thing✨

[downforthegas]

POV: Wa//lly Dar//ling comes to you for relief (Cw: Farts, lap farts, slight hyperfarts, slight scat) Note: This is a little self-indulgent 🍎💨🚽🧻

"Neighbor? Are you there?"

You open the door and see him, his little 3 foot figure, now with a belly that strains the buttons on his cardigan.

"I need some help. I think I ate something bad." He pulls his top up to reveal his little yellow pot belly. I long, low gurgle emitted from it.

*Blbrrt!* "Ah!" It seemed like the small fart caught the puppet by surprise. "Could you help me?"

You lead him to your bed and helped him lie down, trying not to jostle his belly too much. You unbuttoned his cardigan, then his button-up shirt. You noticed his rainbow pants were straining against his poor stomach and unzipped them. Wally sighed in delight.

"Thank you, neighbor."

You sat him on your lap, his back to your chest, as you continued to knead into his soft, felt belly. You felt every little bubble shift and move around, moving into his colon before another *Blllbbbrrrrrrttt!* vibrated against your thighs.

"*Sigh* Excuse me." The smell filled your senses. It was a gross garbagy scent that smelled vaguely of apples. It wasn't too stinky, but just stinky enough to know it was a fart. You asked him what he ate to make him to gassy.

"Um..." Wally seemed hesitant to say. "I got into Howdy's apple display when he wasn't there. And I might've over did it. I hope he's not mad that all the apples are gone. Ha. Ha. Ha." You teased him about being greedy and eating so many apples. Wally just blushed.

"I couldn't help myself," Wally said before leaning forward to rip a *Ppppffffrrrrrtttt!* on you. If sounded quiet in the beginning before rumbling softly.

As much as Wally's farts felt great on your lap, you wanted Wally to find a relief a little faster. You picked him up, lied him on your bed, and pushed his knees to his chest. A bubbly *BBBRRBBBRRRRRTTT!* roared loudly against his pants which were tight against his butt in that position. Wa//lly sighed deeply. "Oh that felt amazing. Let's do some more poses."

You picked him up and pressed his tummy against a table in the room, with your crotch against his butt. He pushed out three short *BRRT!* PLRRRT!* *BBBBRRRT!* against you.

You thought it was good to have him do some exercise. You helped him do sit-ups, crouching in front of his feet, so anytime he farted, it would hit your face. And with every sit-up he did, *Brrt!* "Sigh" *Flrrt!* "Sigh" *Toot!* "Sigh" and your smile grew big with each toot.

After the sit-ups, you figured he should do something more relaxing. You had him positioned where his head was on the ground and his butt was pointing in the air. As soon as he did this, he felt a ton of pressure bubble into his colon. He pushed and *BPPBRLLBBFLLLFBFBRRRRRRTTTTTT!!!!* You don't know how such a loud, ground-shaking fart could come from such a little peanut. "Oh sorry, neighbor." *BLLBBBRRRRLLLBBBBTRRRRR!!!* Another one and your house was really starting to smell. Why were these farts smelling worse than before. "Ha. Ha. Ha. These toots sound a lot like Barnaby's." He pushed once more and *SPPLRRRSHHHRRT!* "Ah." You noticed a visible wet spot on the seat of his pants. He stood up quickly and held his hands over his butt, orange blush covering his whole face.

"Um... could I use your bathroom, neighbor?" You showed him where it was and he went inside to hopefully get rid of all his tummy problems (and maybe clean up). You sat down for a moment and basked in the wonderful, stinky apple smell surrounding your house. You inhaled it from the spot Wally last was when you heard his voice ring out.

"Um, neighbor?" Wally peaked his head out from the door, the flush still covering his face (and no flush from the toilet yet). "I have a big mess to clean up... and there's no toilet paper... do you have any more." You looked around and found a roll of toilet paper, and quickly ran back to the bathroom to your little smelly prince. And made yourself welcome to entering the bathroom to help him clean up. It's the least you could do for getting all that nasty gas out of him. Alternatively, instead of paper, you use an article of your own clothing.

~

This was in the drafts since last year...

[fantasygamers2468]

Electrovorous Toilet

Electrovorous means something that eats anything made of electronics or at least iron or metal. That's why the skibidis are able to eat The Alliance's object-headed people. Coupled with their flexible jaws, they can open their mouths as wide as pythons, and that's what allows them to eat the Cameraman or Speakerman whole.

This was for Halloween of the month. I mean, for Skibitober (Skibidi Toilet-themed Inktober). The prompt is Parasite.

If the object head characters are humans, this might be gory ☠️

Here's the prompt, if you want to plan on making one for Inktober next year.

And this is the lighting-enhanced version, so you can see the other details.

I've never tried drawing with fixed lighting source before; every time I draw with lighting, the sources are always random and irregular, it's like the texture on a 3d character model that is still under development. So the brighter parts of the body are randomly located here and there.

📷

🔊

📺

🚽

Oh.. and also..

Apparently, he damaged their spare parts, just to find a photo of TV Woman. The Scientists wouldn't be happy to see this and that's why they created an anti-parasitic gun.

"!krej a tahW" - TV Man, 2023

[tomorrowusa]

The Sukhoi Su-57 is Russia's most advanced stealth fighter jet. Only about two dozen are operational. It is known that Russia has used these jets to launch Kalibr missiles into Ukraine.

So Ukraine became the first country ever to destroy a Su-57 – and there's reason to believe that it may have taken out TWO of them.

It’s increasingly clear a Ukrainian drone badly damaged, and possibly destroyed, a Russian air force Sukhoi Su-57 stealth fighter in a Saturday raid on Russia's Akhtubinsk State Flight Test Center in southern Russia 365 miles from the Russia-Ukraine border. And it’s possible a second Su-57—out of around two dozen Su-57s the Russian air force has acquired since the type’s first flight in 2010—was also damaged in the raid. “There is preliminary information that there could be two Su-57 aircraft affected,” Andriy Yusov, a spokesman for the Ukrainian intelligence agency, said in a Sunday interview.

The Su-57 is roughly the equivalent of the US F-22.

As recently as 2019, there were at least six twin-engine, supersonic Su-57s at Akhtubinsk. Ground crews routinely parked the radar-evading jets out in the open—eliciting a bitter protest from the Fighterbomber Telegram channel, a popular forum for Russian airmen and their boosters. Fighterbomber asked why, 28 months into Russia’s wider war on Ukraine, the air force hasn’t built hardened shelters for its most precious aircraft—including the Su-57 that Fighterbomber itself confirmed suffered shrapnel damage during the Saturday drone raid.

You read that correctly. These very expensive and relatively rare planes were parked outside in the open during wartime when Ukrainian drones have already struck more than twice the distance into Russia of the Akhtubinsk air base. The Russian military continues to prove that it simply is not very bright.

Meanwhile, Ukraine gets increasingly resourceful and innovative.

But the Ukrainians strike Russian airfields more effectively than the Russians strike Ukrainian airfields—thanks in large part to Ukraine’s growing inventory of long-range strike drones and the relative sluggishness of Russian decision-making. Ukrainian air force commanders frequently, sometimes more than once a day, scatter their jets across a vast network of small airfields and even highway airstrips—all in a preemptive effort to complicate Russian raids on parked planes. Russian air force commanders do no such thing. When Russian jets change bases, it’s usually the result of a long-planned move—often in response to particular bases repeatedly coming under attack by Ukrainian rockets or drones.

Here are before and after satellite photos of one of the wrecked Russian Su-57s.

^^^ Date format is DD/MM/YYYY. The Ukrainian captions simply identify the aircraft and point out burn marks and debris from the explosion. You don't have to annihilate an expensive aircraft to make it unusable.

Russian disinformation, as parroted by both extreme right and extreme left in Europe, often goes like this...

"OMG, there's no way Ukraine can ever defeat Russia with its unlimited resources."

We know that those "unlimited" resources are unable to provide almost a quarter of Russia's rural population with toilets. 🚽

Those Putin stooges want you to ignore how Russia has suffered frequent military humiliations, demonstrated bizarre military incompetence, and has lost hundreds of thousands of troops in the past 28 months. Russia, or rather its predecessor the USSR, lost the 1979-1989 Afghan invasion. Russian incompetence certainly did not vanish 35 years ago when that war ended.

[dutifullyshamelessearthquake]

8. 📚🥱😴😱🏃🏫😮‍💨😵‍💫🤢🚽🤮📝F😭 for Heizou please 🥰

Heizou was sprinting as fast as he could, his footsteps loudly echoing down the hallway. He was late, he was late, he was oh so late.

He dug in his feet, swinging to the right and aggressively shouldering open the men's bathroom. It was empty on the inside, and he booked it to the nearest stall, sliding to a stop before falling into a crouch just in time to be violently sick into the toilet.

Heizou panted breathlessly, his eyes squeezed shut and mouth hanging open. That was what he got for inhaling his breakfast in three large bites, before running all the way from the apartment to the campus. Of course, the one day he oversleeps is the day he has to be there early for an exam, and then of course that is also the day his car wouldn't start.

Heizou gagged again, heaving loudly over the toilet. His breakfast was coming back up completely undigested.

"St.. sto-ah… stop." Heizou moaned, gritting his teeth and swallowing something in his throat back down. "No.. time, the.. the exam."

Flushing the toilet and pressing the back of his hand against his lips, Heizou turned around and staggered out of the stall. He barely made it too steps, before he was gagging against his hand, stumbling back into the stall to continue vomiting.

Heizou could still smell the eggs he'd wolfed down before hurriedly leaving the apartment. The smell was overwhelming. By the time his stomach felt like it had wrung itself out completely, he was so dizzy he was almost seeing double. Heizou spat into the toilet, wiping his mouth on his hand as he reached over to flush again, before staggering up to his feet. It felt a little like his body had just been run over by a truck, but he couldn't miss that exam. Heizou clutched his aching stomach with one hand, half-walking, half jogging out of the bathroom

-

"I can't believe it."

"Believe what?" Aether looked up from the cardboard box of books he was organising.

Heizou was sitting on the couch, staring at his phone in horror. "I botched that exam completely."

"Oh." Aether frowned sympathetically. "I mean, we were expecting that, weren't we?"

Heizou didn't have to clarify which exam he was talking about. It was one of the few classes the two of them shared, and Aether had taken the same exam that day.

"What do you mean you were expecting it?" Heizou scoffed.

Aether raises one eyebrow. "Heizou, you stumbled into the exam hall quite literally two exact minutes before it started, with a puke stain down your t-shirt and a face the colour of ash. You should have just dipped out that day and maybe you could have retaken it."

Initially, Aether had been quite worried for his roommate — until he found out Heizou's misery was entirely his own doing. He still felt sorry for him, but it was something that made him chuckle.

[keepingupwiththecullensblog]

🌟🎬 Welcome back to “Keeping Up with the Cullens”! Or more accurately, “Keeping Up with Bella’s Most Awkward Movie Date Ever.” 🎥🙄 Today, we’re diving into the cringiest third-wheel adventure known to humankind—featuring Bella, Jake, and Mike. It’s an uncomfortable love triangle, complete with awkward hand placements, a puking incident, and, of course, the infamous flu. 😂💀

So here’s the setup: Bella, bless her heart, is just trying to enjoy a “friendly” movie night, but we all know what’s *really* going on. Jake is full-on (and painfully) trying to win her heart, while poor Mike doesn’t stand a chance but gives it his best shot anyway. 💔 Mike’s all in, despite the fact that he’s basically the third wheel, and Bella is doing everything in her power to *firmly* place Jake in the friend zone. 🛑 But Jake? He’s having none of it. 😂

The rest of the group, of course, bails on the movie, leaving Bella smack in the middle of Jake and Mike. Naturally, both of them have their hands on the armrests, palms open, practically begging for her to hold them. 🖐️🖐️ It’s like an unspoken competition for Bella’s affection, and she’s just trying to focus on the screen, pretending not to notice the passive-aggressive hand positioning happening on either side of her. 🙄🍿

Then, the real chaos begins. Mike, clearly not built for horror movies—or maybe just the love triangle tension—gets *really* sick. 🤢 Bella’s already trying to manage the awkwardness of the situation, and now she’s got a barfing Mike to deal with. They have to leave the theater *mid-movie* because Mike is about to explode! 💀

As Mike is hunched over the theater restroom toilet, Jake, sensing his big moment, decides it’s the perfect time to have a heart-to-heart with Bella. 💬 He basically tells her that he’s not giving up, and that he’ll keep trying to win her heart. And Bella’s thinking, “Really, Jake? Now? This is what we’re doing while Mike’s puking his guts out?” Talk about timing! 😂💀

Thankfully, Jake is quick on his feet and, smart guy that he is, grabs a popcorn bucket for the ride home to spare his freshly fixed rabbit from Mike’s barf. 🍿🤢 And it's a good thing, too, because Mike was definitely not done. 🛠️✨ Crisis averted—sort of. After dropping off Mike, Jake starts feeling sick too, and they assume it’s that flu that’s been making the rounds. 🤧 Bella’s thinking, “Great, now it’s my turn to feel like death,” and she’s not wrong because, that night, she catches the infamous flu as well. 🤒💤

Now here’s the part that really gets me—where the heck is Edward? 😤 This is prime boyfriend material. Your girl is passed out, feverish, and in desperate need of some TLC, and you’re just missing in action? 👀 I’m actually *pissed* about this. Edward, my guy, this is your moment! Wouldn’t Alice *see* Bella’s suffering and give you a heads-up? And you just... let her deal with the flu all alone? Not cool. Meanwhile, Ben is over here being the best boyfriend, taking care of Angela while *she’s* sick. Take notes, Edward. 😠

And don’t even get me started on Charlie. Bella said he probably went to work just to have a “free bathroom.” 🚽 Really, Charlie? Your daughter’s passed out on the bathroom floor with a fever, and all you do is leave her a glass of water before you head off to work? Sure, you put her to bed that night, but come on! If she had passed out from her fever, you’d be a strong contender for Worst Dad of the Year. 😒

A couple of days later, Bella starts feeling better and naturally, she starts calling Jake’s house to see how he’s doing. She’s been trying to get in touch with him, but he’s completely MIA. 📞 When she finally gets a hold of him, Jake drops a bombshell: “I don’t think I have the flu…” He’s all confused, not knowing exactly what’s happening to him yet. Meanwhile, Bella’s still thinking it’s just the flu, while we, the audience, are sitting here like, “Oh sweetie, if only you knew…” 😬🐺

But here’s the kicker: Edward would *totally* have lost his mind if he knew about this awkward movie date. You *know* how jealous Edward gets over Mike of all people. The fact that Bella was caught in a third-wheel situation with Mike? Edward would’ve been mentally planning how to “accidentally” leave Mike in the woods for the wolves. 😤 It still kills me how much Edward was jealous of Mike at this point. Poor Mike doesn’t stand a chance, and yet, here’s Edward, low-key (or high-key) wanting to murder him. 😂

In the end, this whole thing was a *complete* mess. Bella’s awkward love triangle movie date turned into a flu-ridden disaster. Mike’s puking, Jake’s confessing his undying love while holding a popcorn bucket, and Bella’s trying to piece it all together while dealing with the flu. And where was Edward? MIA, as usual, during the one moment where Bella actually needed him to be there. 😒

[snobgoblin]

original video

[video description: a video posted by instagram user @/insane_vidoes (there is music playing I cannot quite identify) with two blocks of text overlaying it, one reading "Never use the bathroom at McDonald's ☠️⚠️🤬" and "Can't even take a dump 😭🚽". the video is from the point of view of someone in a McDonald's, opening the door to the bathroom, only to find that a deer is inside the very small room eating toilet paper, unbothered. end description]

*runs into my nearest McDonald's bathroom*

[kmp78]

You are literally making zero sense K.

*ding dong* 🔔

The doorbell rang loudly and startled JL from his slumber. 😴

"Who the fuck is this now," he yawned on his way to the door. Poor bastard had just fallen asleep as is customary for gentlemen of a certain age as it was almost 8pm already. 🥱🚪

He grabbed the door handle annoyed.

"Don't you fucking know what time it i-..." 😳

In front of him stood SL wearing nothing but skimpy lacy undies and pink tassles hanging from each nipple. 🔞

"Oh sorry, I didn't mean to wake you... I'll go now..."

"Don't you fucking dare!", JL gasped and grabbed SL's hand.

"Get in here before the neighbors see you! Gina's already collecting names around the block to have me evicted!"

SL quickly stepped in and turned to face JL.

"Well, I was just so lonely at home and I was wondering if..."

"Wondering what?"

SL fidgeted with the tassles, making JL feel all twitchy inside. 😵‍💫

"Wondering what?", JL grew impatient.

"I was wondering if we could have a do-over from last night... I mean... uhm... it all ended so abrup-"

"STOP I DON'T WANNA TALK ABOUT IT", JL yelped and pushed SL aside from the corridor.

"But honey it's no big deal! It happens to all guys!"

"I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT!", JL screeched as he practically ran into the nearest bathroom and locked himself in. 🚽

SL stood outside the door, gently tapping on the door. 🚪

"Babe... babe come on talk to me..."

"NO!" 😡

"It's really not a big deal... I mean... when men reach the age of fift-"

"I'M ACTUALLY FORTY THE PRESS HAS BEEN REPORTING IT INCORRECTLY!" 😡

SL tried to stiffle a giggle.

"Yes sorry I got confused I meant to say that at FORTY our bodies start to change and certain... things... can happen. Or... not happen, as the case may be, but anyway it's nothing to be ashamed of, really".

There was no sound from the other side of the door. 🚪

"Honey?", SL whispered.

Nothing but crickets. 🦗🦗🦗

"Honeeeeeeey...?", SL tried again.

On the other side of the door JL was sitting on the toilet, fidgeting and fiddling with a roll of toilet paper, shredding it onto the floor. 🧻

He was finding it oddly soothing for his angst but also creating more angst because gosh darn those things cost a pretty penny these days and now one of the interns is gonna have to tape this pile of shred back together tomorrow cos he ain't about to waste as many as 7 dollars! 🤨

Suddenly he saw something pink being pushed under the door.

He reached and picked it up.

A tassle. 🤔

And then suddenly another one appeared. 🤔

"Wait..."

JL dropped the rest of the toilet paper shreds and focused on fiddling with the tassles.

"If I'm holding these things here... then that must mean..."

Indeeeeeeeeeeed.

It meant that SL was standing on the other side of the door with no tassles. 😈

JL smirked as he felt his little FORTY year old 🐛 tingling with signs of life.

"Did you get my present?", SL asked through the door.

"Yeeeeah..."

"Do you know what that means?"

"Yeeeeah..."

"Do you wanna come out and fuck me against this door?"

"Yeeeeah..."

JL opened the door and saw SL standing in the corridor, sans tassles.

And also sans undies. 😮

"Well?", SL asked. "The door is ready."

JL grabbed SL and they kissed passionately as SL started tearing JL's nightie off. 👅

Within second they were both standing there completely naked, as JL broke away from their kiss and pushed SL facing the bathroom door.

"I hope your... "door"... is ready." 🍑

(And OF COURSE the SL in that story was Samantha Lachlan but did you know it while reading it? 🤔)

[crewdlydrawn]

It is literally always some version of “I desperately have to pee but the only available method is on a toilet that is out in the open”. No one else in this scenario has to do this; they’ve all got stalls and doors. Sometimes the setups are ridiculously elaborate… whole Lore-setting storytime in my head just to lead me to an exposed toilet.

🚽

everyone has dreams about being lost at school, late to work, cant find bathroom etc but whats yalls most common Uncommon stress dream. ill always have dreams about having various problems with my fish tank

[horowbath]

🚽✨ Transform your bathroom with the HOROW T38 Smart Bidet Toilet! 🛁

In her new video, @JessieLifestyleAtHome shows how this high-tech toilet combines UV sterilization, auto-open lids, and remote controls for a bathroom that’s both luxurious and hygienic. Plus, get tips on how to keep your space sparkling with minimal effort and create a spa-like retreat right at home! 🌟

Looking for a bathroom upgrade that combines style and convenience? This is the video for you!

[yescrazycatlady10]

Skibidi Toilet Plush Large Blind Bag Opening! 🚽

[giannic]

Monday, Memorial Day 2024

My squat at least has a broken toilet 🚽 which I can flush by pouring about five gallons of water. I have running water, if not a water heater. I wash dishes in the tub after I clean it. Lost my key to the mailbox, so I have to wait for the postman. At least not today - it's a national holiday. The replacement fee is $45, which I can't afford. However, I'm grateful that I can lock my place, that no one has towed my truck, that the roof doesn't leak anymore.

Oh, that. To get the association to fix the roof, it took constant gentle persuasion, including me begging the building manager to talk to the association about the roof & the black mold. He opened the trunk of his fancy white sedan and pulled out a handgun, stating that he felt threatened. I turned around and walked away. When the tenants heard what happened, they spoke with the association, who called the manager to the carpet, demanding he give five years' account of how he's been spending the money they pay for upkeep & repairs. He came back with one year of records & quit.

The association put out bids, got a roofing company to replace our roof. I'm grateful, & I think others are glad too.

I'm going to save some money for a refrigerator, so I don't have to keep throwing out spoiled food, and I won't have to travel 13 miles to a soup kitchen for a hot meal. One step at a time.

Thanks for reading. If you have faith, pray for us in these tenements known as the Bat Cave. Have a blessed day. Now, back to the concert.

[v4miiii]

Hi hi this is my main account where I post shit or my art :3! Call me Vamii or Granola!! More about me in my CARRD !

ART REQUEST'S RULES

REQUESTS: OPEN

REQUESTS TO DO: 4

⚠️My SIDEBLOGS:

@lil-str33t-br4t - RP blog (ORIGINAL CHARACTER from HONKAI: STAR RAIL)

@ask-lynx - RP blog (LYNX from HONKAI: STAR RAIL)

@your-local-cat - RP blog (fandomless OC)

@br1ghth34rt - RP blog (BRIGHTHEART from WARRIOR CATS)

@nanatzcayan-young-braveheart - RP blog (KACHINA from GENSHIN IMPACT)

@smith-of-echoes - RP blog (XILONEN from GENSHIN IMPACT)

@elegance-in-shadows - RP blog (LYNETTE from GENSHIN IMPACT)

@anxious-maid - RP blog (CORIN WICKES from ZENLESS ZONE ZERO)

⚠️My FANDOMS:

🚄HONKAI: STAR RAIL

Favs: Aventurine, Boothill, Robin, March 7th, Jing Yuan, Firefly & Lynx

UID: 716494733

🌌GENSHIN IMPACT

Favs: Lynette, Xilonen, Kachina, Cyno, Emilie & Chevreuse

UID: 725400721

🐾WARRIOR CATS

Favs: Thrushpelt, Briarlight, Brightheart, Leafstar, Cinderpelt/heart & Hollyleaf

🦉THE OWL HOUSE

Favs: Vee, Hunter & Gus

✏️ANIMATION VS ANIMATION

⚡INAZUMA ELEVEN

Favs: Endou Mamoru & Fubuki Shirou

❄️KOMI CAN'T COMMUNICATE

Favs: Osana Najimi, Otori Kaede & Komi Shouko

🚽TOILET-BOUND HANAKO-KUN

Favs: Mitsuba Sousuke & Kou Minamoto

🏢DRIFTING HOME

Favs: Noppo

🐈‍⬛A WHISKER AWAY

Favs: Miyo Sasaki & Kinako

⚠️TAGS:

#v4miiii yappin - some shitposts

#v4miiii tries to draw - my arts

#v4miiii's pookies - me when pookies

#v4miiii's queue - queued posts

#v4miiii's requests - my requests

#v4miiii's ocs - my ocs' stuff

Tba

[lom-journal]

Sunday March 10/24-Set Cable Oscars- Time Change Last Night, Spring Forward! We got ABC ON THE RED CARPET “OSCARS” Peter Showered 🧼 Today!

Peter and the gurls up at 5:30 a.m. the new time time spring forward! I slept in until 7:30 a.m. new time ! Peter has walked the dogs and sprayed the toilets ! **The guest bathroom the toilet 🚽 bowl slider is not operating stuck in open position ! **First thing this morning I took 2x T’s + Pink med and a full glass of Water 💦 7:30 a.m. ***Also I had a Large Poop 💩💩💩!****and a second Large Poop💩💩💩!We web t to Von’s ! Peter shopped and now we are back at the bus 🚌 at 10:00 a.m. I’m taking 2 x T’s at Noon and 1x T at 1 :00 p.m, (5)****2 x T’s at 3:00 p.m. (7)*****next 6:30 x 2 , 1 at bedtime and thru the night******! We are watching The Policeman with” Harry Styles” and we had home made bread chicken with cheese sandwiches for our dinner watching the movie! 🎥! Peter made an Apple 🍎 Pie and well have that when he gets back from Walking the Dogs! The time is 5:44 p.m.

[starrysys]

HI!

We’re the Stardust System!

Our pronouns and name are Starry or Oskar and they/it collectively

We are an undiagnosed neurotraumagenic OSDD system, but we’re working on getting a diagnosis

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DNI:

basic criteria

proshitters

fakeclaimers

anti-self diagnosis

radqueers

dream stans

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we are endo neutral !! Please do not bring syscourse onto this blog thank you -💫🫂

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FREQUENT FRONTERS:

Airy (he/him), fictive, ageless, announcer, -🏕️

Allan (he/him), fictive, 28, romantic protector, -🪪

Anya (she/spy), fictive, 4-6, role unknown, -🔎

Ashton (he/it/bolt), brainmade, 16, emotional protector, -🎸

Beavis (he/it), fictive, 14, autism holder, -🤘

Bonanza (she/it), unknown, 11, anxiety holder, -🎊

Cherry (she/heart), brainmade, 19, procrastination holder/sexual protector, -❤️‍🔥

Cleo (she/her/fae), fictive, 16, gunslinger, -💄

Connor (he/him), brainmade, 16, archivist/trauma holder/autism holder, -🎧

Daphne (she/toff), brainmade, 6-8, hyperempathy holder, -🌸

Dave (he/it), fictive, 43, persecutor/passive suicidal ideation holder, -🔪

Euphemia (she/he), fictive, 53, discipliner, -Ms. A

Fan(he/they/RAWR/XD),fictive,17,ADHD holder,-🪭

Freddie (he/him), faitive, 31, role unknown, -🪨

Gabriel (he/him), factive, 16, emotional protector/soother, -👾

Jack (he/him), factive, 36, echolalia holder, -🕳️

Kennedy (he/they), fictive, 16, mood-booster, -🧬

Kyle (he/him), fictive, 9, writer, -🍁

MePhone (he/him), fictive, 25, hyfix host, -📱

Mic (they/he/she), fictive, 31, verbal protector, -🎤

Oboro (he/cloud/any), fictive,19, mood-booster, -☁️

Olivia (they/she), brainmade, 13, substitute/ADHD holder, -🍄

Oscar (he/him), fictive, 39, task-doer, -🎩

Oz (they/he/xe/it/star/cloud), brainmade, 15, host/anxiety holder, -🌟

Phineas (he/him), fictive, 16-17, co-host/confidence holder, -🏅

Shota (he/purr), fictive, 32, avenger/prosecutor,-👁️

SpongeBob (any pronouns, he/him preferred), fictive, 12-16, socializer, -💫🫂

Squidward (he/ink), fictive, 29, apathy holder, -🦷

Star (they/it/xe), brainmade, 17, romantic protector, -��

Test Tube (she/boom), fictive, 16, unknown, -🧪

Tissue (he/it), fictive, 19, chronic pain holder, -🤧

Toilet (it/he), fictive, 29, mood-booster, -🚽

Tomura (he/dust), fictive, 34, trauma holder, -🚬

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TAG KEY:

gen post: general post

reblog: reblog

our stuff: our original post

airyposting: airy’s post

anyaposting: Anya’s post

ashposting: Ashton’s post

beavposting: beavis’s post

nanzaposting: bonanza’s post

cherryposting: cherry’s post

connorposting: Connor’s post

daphposting: Daphne’s post

daveposting: Dave’s post

euphieposting: Euphemia’s post

fanposting: fan’s post

fredpost: Freddie’s post

gabrielposting: Gabriel’s post

jackposting: Jack’s post

JFKposting: kennedy’s post

kyleposting: Kyle’s post

mePost4: mePhone’s post

micposting: mic’s post

oliviaposting: Olivia’s post

oscarposting: Oscar’s post

ozposting: Oz’s post

finnyposting: Phineas’s post

shoposting: shota’s post

spongeposting: SpongeBob’s post

squidposting: Squidward’s post

starposting: star’s post

tubeposting: Test Tube’s post

tissueposting: Tissues’ post

toiposting: Toilet’s post

shigposting: tomura’s post

idkwhoposting: tag for when we don’t know who’s fronting

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OTHER SOCIALS:

Starry-Sys on SimplyPlural

@ozzie-jests <-main blog

jesterblog on SpaceHey (inactive)

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ASKBOX: OPEN!!! ASK US ANYTHING