#On the Clock

[desire-mona]

its so funny working at a school when ur queer bc whenever u come out its like you get a live action modern retelling of this

[renaissancewoodsman]

[axol-artist]

Man this ban is getting ridiculous.

[eyeballcommander]

@detective-fez

(Previous) Detective Fez skimmed the nauseatingly long document, then once he had barely made a dent in the handfuls of names listed he clicked his tongue, finger pressed beneath his head. Where would he start again? Probably root around right? Look for clues? Admittedly, his head felt a bit foggy from his previous night of staying up late, booze in hand, watching whatever came on at that hour. He settled his brew of thoughts and slid his phone into his coat again. “Um, yeah okay. Could I look around a bit if you don’t mind?” He inquired, eye squinted as he scoped out where he was, not really paying attention to Commander Peepers.

Commander Peepers narrowed his eye at Detective Fez. He had taken time out of his busy day to estimate the amount of missing dogs, and even gave him detailed data to analyze, for what? Him to not even pretend to be interested in the summary page?

Well, that’ll teach him not to waste anymore time on this defective detective! He let out a scoff before saying,

“Sure. Whatever. Just stay out of restricted areas and find WR if you need anything.” With that Commander Peepers walked off to get back to more important matters. Thank grop he wasn’t paying him!

[inspectorheath]

@detective-fez

(Previous) As soon as Detective Fez saw the dispenser he was up creek without a paddle. He let out a doomed and dramatic groan, stomping his feet for extra effect. He ripped a ticket from the teeth of the appliance and dragged himself inside of the now unlocked door mechanism. He trudged through, glancing at the other watchdogs who were lazily sleeping or anxiously bouncing their legs staring at the screen which counted their fates. He glanced around for an employee, surely if he said he was on official business he’d get in quicker, he trotted up to the clerk, retrieved his badge matter-of-factly and slaped it down onto the desk. “Hey, I’m Detective Fez Manuel, I’m here, officially. Yeah, uh, I need to get back there so if you could kindly let me through that’d be great.” He smiled with fake sincerity, his tone on the brim of suspense.

Every single watchdog in the room (that was paying attention) glowered at Detective Fez’ display. Clerk included. She was about to order him to get in line when she realized that if he wasn’t telling the truth he would be walking straight into an interrogation room.

So she looked past him to address the watchdog storming up to him. “Number 5821, keep your trap shut and hands to yourself or I’ll have him hand you his ticket.”

The watchdog who had waited seven hours only to watch some guy cut in front of them crossed their arms and tapped their foot like the tail of a particularly irate cat.

Then the clerk picked up the phone. “Hey Pat. I need you to come deal with this guy claiming to be a detective.”

After a moment she huffed. “Look, I am not leading him back. Not unless you want to come take care of an assault.”

She locked eyes with 5821 with an unspoken understanding that she wouldn’t step in no matter what happened. They did their part by slamming their foot down and letting out a low growl.

“Just look for the guy dressed as a sunny stereotypical old-fashioned reporter. You can’t miss him.” With that she hung up and gestured for him to step aside.

After a few minutes a door on the right-hand side of the room opened to reveal a heavy-set watchdog wearing a sharp suit. “Detective Fez, right? Come on back with me,” she said as he beckoned him over. Her voice was stern and rough, with pauses that hinted that she was working on catching her breath.

She waited for him to follow her in before shutting the door and grabbing his hand. “Name’s Inspector Patricia Heath, head of the Skullship Criminal Investigation Department,” she said while giving him a firm handshake. “But you can call me Patty.” Although with her accent it sounded closer to paddy.

Once her introduction was done she turned around and briskly walked towards her office. “So you’re investigating unexplained disappearances, eh? I have a file cabinet full of them.”

[fragilecapric0rnn]

dealing with the type of brain worms that have me typing entire scenes of dialogue in the notes app of my phone

[oktaviaslabyrinth]

Whirlpool Tune // Splatoon 3 (2022)

[evilfranzkafka]

jon, pall, rango and gorge

[thisbroadd]

we are so back.

[hellfire--cult]

guess we're back to skype yall

joIN meh >w< ,.-~´¨¯¨*·~-.¸-(_prιnceѕѕoғ darĸneѕѕrawr94_)-,.-~*´¨¯¨·~-.¸

[desire-mona]

hate being the job oomf, how do i tell all the cool as fuck mutuals that my blorbo is my coworker?? its fucking up my dash cred

[swordwizard]

Have to go back to work after my lunch break

[eyeballcommander]

@detective-fez

(Previous) Fez blinked, suddenly very aware of his unprofessionalism. He meekly trotted beside Peepers, not giving him much eye contact beyond the occasional glance. He figured he should be more lively or friendly but there wasn’t much time for that. Then again, it wouldn’t hurt to be a bit humorous, besides, his case didn’t seem like much, but he knew he was onto something big, he could feel it creep through his entire being. “Sorry.” He replied, his voice was slightly gruff, but cheeky. He knew Peepers was a pretty serious guy, or carried himself with a bit of arrogance, but he assumed commanding a great and terrible army would take anyone’s whimsy. As they strode through the ship, Fez stuffed his hands into his pockets idly once he got a tad more comfortable. With his lid drooped, he noticed a helping of watchdogs that didn’t seem to be as stuck up as Peepers was, they seemed be chatting amongst themselves, it also was fascinating that he was among his peer group, out there he was nearly getting stepped on. It seemed his unprofessionalism didn’t stick out in the way he thought it did. “So, must be fun working here.” He said sarcastically, humoring himself.

“Uggghh...” Commander Peepers groaned while pinching his forehead. “Too fun, if you ask me. I keep telling Lord Hater to stop blowing money on arcades, and hot tubs, and that food court and such but does he listen?”

He threw his hands out in exasperation. “Of course not! So when he gets bored of his snazzy new toy the watchdogs get to have another luxury amenity on this flarping warship!” Then he started to mutter. “I swear, if I had full control of the budget...”

At this point Commander Peepers realized that he had gotten off track. He coldly ordered the group of watchdogs to stop chattering like a bunch of busybodies and get back to work as he passed through.

Once they had dispersed he stopped and pulled out his phone. “What’s your email?”

[inspectorheath]

@detective-fez

(Previous) Not very aware of himself, he glanced back at the dog and blinked, not really grasping the concept of cutting in lines. He just stared back with a dopey expression as the clerk rang whoever, giving a tensey wave. He didn’t even know what he was getting himself into, all he knew was that Commander Peepers said to go here. Then, he realized he was being taken by the hand after not paying attention, he yelped as he began briskly walking with Patty. Realizing she had been introducing herself, he cleared his throat and stumbled behind her. “Oh- Hey! Hey! Ouch! Um, yeah I’m him, you know how it is, all this… Work I mean, that’s always a chore. Um, Patty. Pat. Pat-a-roonie.” He laughed awkwardly, catching up with her. Usually, he had slacked off, often. Now he was talking to a woman who seemed like she knew what she was doing just from a first impression. He compared himself, who was less-so serious about his job. He blinked as he trotted, holding his hat down as they made their way into her office. “Um, yeah, anything like that would be good. Fun. Good. Um, helpful! I mean. Yeah, I don’t really have anything like that lying around.” He rambled on, sputtering over his sentences.

All that over a handshake? Wow, this guy... sure was something. And to think that Inspector Heath had expected some strength to back up his decision to try to sneak in the front door of a warship.

But she was impressed with how he was completely unfazed by the large amount of unsolved cases which hinted at how overwhelmed and understaffed her department was. So much that she had to stop caring about every Tom, Dick, and Harriet years ago because it was the only way to keep from having a mental breakdown. Afterall, there was no guarantee that anyone would replace her.

Not only that: Detective Fez was excited to start working on all those cold cases! That was worth far more than even Herculan strength.

Heath broadly grinned and gave him a rough, yet friendly, pat on the back. “Glad to hear it.”

Then she straightened both her expression and posture. “I’ll bring you straight there.”

[osaka-lilac]

shout out to george harrison just Moaning at the end of while my guitar gently weeps. love hearing that on the loud speakers at work