#Ok this is the fifth time ive dyed it i think | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

metukika · 2 years ago

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ok you needing a second to understand that tumbel in tumblr saved me from my embarrassment for having misread your message xD hell yeah haha

maybe you could write us a lil post about your favorite character & why they are that :D (soz for not doin it myself i‘m not feeling like putting anything out there today)

and don‘t decide that you won‘t ever contribute to a bigger project that touches people yet !!!!!! YOU‘RE SO YOUNG you‘ve got the whole world waiting for you and you‘re ALREADY so good at art though. your art is already touching people, no reason why that shouldn‘t work if you should ever work with others on a bigger project!!! GET OUT THEREEE i mean also take your time but IF YOU WANT THAT ABSOLUTELY SHOOT YOUR SHOT KEEP YOUR EYES OPEN FOR OPPORTUNITIES i‘d personally love to see your work in something bigger :D nothing‘s set in stone <3 <3 <3 !!!

aww thank you so much anon! idk who you are but youre so kind to me... thats so nice!

about the whole future thing... i know i have a lot of time but i think because of some stuff coming up soon (when i leave school) im stressed about the future and my decisions in it entirely. idk what im gonna do if i need to go to the military lol like what job to take... i havent started driving and i dont understand shit about all the other stuff thats attached with going to the military im just stressed in general. i dont wanna end up staying in my parents house forever ig.

but i have a lot of time and i know that even if my connection with my friends fade away when they get recruited (which is... also something that could happen... oh god i dunno how to make irl friends) i still have my family, and probably the online world too. if i open commissions im pretty sure id get some work, but i dont think i could do that too much cuz i hate drawing things i dont wanna draw.

but, again, who knows what will happen. ill be fine haha, especially if there are people like you who care enough to write messages like these. most of my online friends are from twt so its always nice to see a tumblr fan <3 thank you anon.

(im realizing how depressed this is all making me sound like i promise its just my school hammering in the importance of the military signs up like i dont even know what part of the mess ill be in most of the time theyre teaching shit that doesnt concern me. im okay, im not dying!!)

now to actually talk about my favorite character! woohoo! happy topic change!

for the two people who read this and the one thats actually gonna read till the end, im putting a cut so this isnt annoying on ur dash (note to anon: this post is so so fucking long i know u prob asked me my fav character to cheer me up but dont force urself to read this whole thing just to be polite lmaooo but id appreciate it if anyone did cuz holy shit)

something that ive realized a while back is that usually when it comes to favorite characters of media, i have a type.

when i made this the character i had in mind where souda (danganronpa), aiura (saiki k) and teru (mp100).

after making the tweet i also thought of denji (csm) who fits right in, and also bakugou (mha) who doesnt, but he looks like half of the characters i did mention lol.

i think the whole social but nice thing came to because of all those shows and stories where the popular kid in school is the mean bully.. maybe i dislike this trope cuz i havent personally experienced any kind of bullying in my school, even as an observer so i cant relate to the experience of having this type of antagonist. the worst it ever got for me was when in fifth grade a girl made fun of me for crying and no one laughed. (shes still in my class over six years later and shes really nice not ufhduh were not friends but were friendly and i dont hold a grudge). maybe its just cuz im wholesome so i dislike any type of negative character. maybe.

that might sound stupid cuz i said i like bakugou, who i used to think of constantly, like for the entirety of 2021 he was in my mind it was annoying. but idk man not all my favs fit into this category ((shinguuji, saihara, yuuko, tweek (who also looks like them! what the fuck!) yuudai from sakana (why are they all blond?!? and men. more female characters what the fuck) barf bag (yes im an object show fan good morning)))

anyways. i like the popular but nice trope is what im saying. why are they all simps? i dont know honestly only one of the characters that i mentioned at the start is simping for someone i ship them with (terumob) (but the reason i even like teru in the first place might be cuz i saw terumob art, thought it was cute, and decided to search more art. i do that with a lot of characters when i dont watch the show (from the original list ive watched all of saiki k, watched playthroughs of the first 2 dr games, watched like a season of mp100 years ago and watched like 2 seasons of mha even before that. i get my filling of plot and character from meme videos, fanart, and fanfics. i understand enough.) and i get hooked on the ship (more examples include akiangel, kiribaku and the two gay boys from evangelion. a lot of homo happening. also whatever the fic version of this is but with denji and yoshida).

about the simping and the bakugou being mean-- i accept my character's flaws!!! i dont erase them!!! bakugou is an asshole and thats why i wanna see him get punished and learn from his mistakes, even if its a little hard! a great fic where this happens (but isnt the main storyline) is quirk: knife! which is probably my favorite non ship heavy fic, check it out!

my fav characters have flaws but just like how you need to embrace flaws in the people you love, whether that means helping them get better or accepting them, i embrace these flaws cuz it makes them who they are! souda, denji and auira wouldnt be themselves if they werent pushing the lines with their crushes and idk what the fuck bakugou would be if he wasnt what he was.

alright lets actually start talking about my favorite character now.

so, right now, my favorite character of all time is-- ding ding ding-- kazuichi souda! who i already mentioned.

look at him! idk if the one and a half people who are reading this know him, but if u know denji, who is a more popular character atm, then imagine that but more wimpy.

the first time i encountered this character i was watching game grump's playthrough of the second game. i watched their first and enjoyed it but didnt really join the fandom. i didnt know anything about the second so i was going in blind like arin and dan, so theres a chance that whatever i thought about the characters was biased and connected to how they feel.

at first i really liked his design. a lot of the characters have small and complicated details but souda is probably the most simple design, not including hinata, but unlike him souda has a lot of bright colors that draw the eye in! i dont particularly prefer designs with sharp teeth but i think its a pretty nice quirk, since its another part of him that makes him look intimidating. theres a headcanon that he filed themselves but i honestly think he wouldnt do that, and prefer the headcanon that its genetic, even if it makes less sense. but danganronpa, and their designs, dont make sense. i think these little strange quirks are better when they arent thoughtout or have reason. he has sharp teeth becuz. just cuz.

if u dont know what happens in the game im just gonna say that the plot doesnt really matter, cuz really the only growth souda experiences is with his relationship to hinata (the main character) and his trust to his survivor friends that makes him stronger and convinces him to leave the virtual reality. im not gonna be talking about the plot in detail. i also havent watched the anime so im not gonna get into whatever he does there. i do know that he makes some cute faces in it, which is pretty awesome.

but, yeah, besides his design, at the start i truthfully didnt really like him lmaooo he was kind of stalkerish towards sonia (ill prob get into their relationship later), he is also a wimp but honestly... i get it hes stuck in a killing game i would be scared of anything too. i feel like of all of the cast, from all the games, souda is probably one of the best depictions of an actual teenager that might exist. of course he has his obnoxious moments, but in a way that a dumb teenager would have. i dont know when i started liking him, maybe after discovering soudam? hmm.

kazuichi is the ultimate mechanic, which is one of the talents in the game that actually gets used? he makes the communicators in chap 3 and fixes the elevator in chap 4. besides that, he is also important to the second chapter since he helped tie up komaeda and he also brought hinata to the diner, though that has nothing to do with his talent.

he learned to be a great mechanic from working at his dad's repair shop or garage or whatever its called. its mentioned that their family is pretty poor, and i think the concept of a character being at one point or another un-wealthy pretty interesting (did that come strange? sorry). he worked to help get their family money he is a good boy, he mentions being better than his dad too. he doesnt look like the typical mechanic, except from the greasy hair and jumpsuit (im talking specifically about his color scheme) and thats another one of those quirks that make no sense but i just like haha

speaking of his parents, lets talk about a popular headcanon that fans have of souda's dad (before we start i wanna state that my opinion on this topic and the topic of souda relationship towards sonia and his trust issues were all stem from an analysis video of him on youtube, if u know u know, so if i want someone more competent talking about it go there, but if u dont care enough to research it or ure only reading because u like me and wanna hear me talk about something i care about dw im gonna go into detail about these anyways

the hc is that souda's dad physically abuses him. i wanna talk about why dont agree (if u wanna skip this part ill put *** when it ends so just go there <3). this hc stems from a story he tells hinata in one of the free time events where he didnt go to his previous school trips because he wanted to save money for his family, even though he really wanted to go, and he says something along the lines of how his dad "beat the crap outta him" when he didnt go.

do i think his dad hit him? probably. i dont really know how common this type of discipline is in japan, or in places with more un-wealthy people so this might be normal to them. does that make that okay? obviously not. but if the only example we get for him hitting souda is after souda does something good for the family in his own expense, it wont make sense for his father to be mad about it, right? i think he was upset his son had to give up his happiness for them, even if it was to save money. the analysis vid said it might be souda just using more dramatized words for it. He was hesitant to tell hinata that he was picked on at school, i dont think hed just admit to being abused so casually. i think his dad might have smacked him from time to time when he was younger but probably stopped the more souda grew up. if his dad really hated him he wouldnt beat him after doing something that would benefit the dad, is what im saying.

also i think that the way souda acts doesnt reflect someone who would be regularly abused... its not like im an expert, but if we for example look at tsumiki, who was canonically abused and bullied regularly, we can see a great difference. yes, souda tends to be caught off guard or scared of stuff, but usually its less of other people and more about the situation around him. he was scared of monokuma and the monobeasts and the morning after the killing gama announcement. he's also generally not that apologist about his stupid behavior... for example he doesnt feel remorse for tying up komaeda, and even threatens to tie up kuzuryuu too. i also think he said something about wanting to punch one of the other guys? this might be cuz he tends to blurt out his thoughts stupidly and doesnt know how to hold his tongue (something that, if he was abused, would probably get him in trouble) but he never recoils from what he said. he whines about being judged, like after letting slip that he was thinking of sonia in a creepy way, but he never goes back and is afraid that someone might punish him or hurt him. like how tsumiki apologizes for the smallest thing at claims that she'll take any punishment.

it might also be because i generally dont like hcing characters with abusive parents haha. i know for a lot of characters its a part of what makes them who they are, but if thats not the case i feel like its always to excuse the character from some frowned upon trait they have.

its a bit difficult to explain so ill take an example from a different character from a different show. todoroki from mha was abused as a child, and its a part of what makes him him, and its a big part of his character, even if hes not in that situation anymore. i wont deny it. now, theres a hc that some people like to believe about bakugou's parents, specifically his mom, being abusive. this isnt canon. first of all everyone is entitled to hc what they want but a lot of the time i feel this is a way to explain his asshole behavior (also i just love mitsuki). i dont like excusing his fucked up actions and blaming his parents. i think that him being an asshole from the ideals that he himself made is kind of what made him interesting. he believes in what he learned from his own experiences that he and only he had. his stupid child thinking made him the gross person he is, and thats way more interesting than blaming his parents' behavior, like we can do with reason in todoroki's case. todoroki acts antagonistic at the start of the show because of the pressure his dad put on him.

now going back to souda, by making his dad abusive a lot of people linked that to him being a creep towards sonia. while i do see how his parents and their expectations might be a motivator, i prefer to blame souda himself for his wrong actions. i dont want to excuse his actions like that. its more interesting to see him grow from the ideals and reasonings he made himself.

***

now let's talk about his relationship with hinata! woo!

canonically, hinata is the person souda is closes to in the game, even though most of the time hinata is just tolerating his stupid behavior. except in his free time events maybe. their relationship is probably the biggest character development souda gets.

lets talk about his past a little more.

souda tells hinata that he used to be picked on for looking like a nerd. he had black hair (but i hc it more like dark brown, because reminder this is a post gushing about my fav character first and an canalization second), brown eyes (in hc world dull pale brown cuz a lot of the char's eyes are dull and pale colored) and glasses (hc: thin and rectangle shaped). he's not really a nerd... except that he's probably good at math and that type of things, since he builds machines and all. if i remember correctly, he says his bullied got away with what they did because he tends to be naive and trusts too easily. he was also used by his best friend that cheated off of his test, blamed souda for it (which he didnt really mind, showcasing how much not a nerd he is if he doesnt care about his studying and tests like that) and then kinda ghosted after feeling bad. but at the time souda was really heartbroken and felt betrayed, this whole situation gave him trust issues because that his naive heart cant tell when someone really wants to be his friend or if they'll drop him when they dont need him anymore.

souda and hinata start off being friends because souda didnt like any of the other guys enough (fair enough, hinata is the most normal one lol) and he tolerated him enough to go to the diner on the second island to spy on the girls with him. at the time kuzuryuu was still an asshole to everyone, but the two do get friendlier after the second trial (survivor boys bff agenda. i did say "bff coded" didnt i?)

souda tells hinata that after his ex best friend left him, he kinda went through something-- he dyed his hair, put in contacts, and pierced his ears (which i like to think was really scare to him) (and i assume this is when he started to wear bright colors, but i like to think he was always a fan of them (aiura and teru kinnie)) to make himself more intimidating (like i said in the list! remember the list?!) so that he wont be picked on. i assume the bullying he experienced was more emotional that physical, and he was probably called names for his nerdy appearance and was made to do tasks for toxic friends and somethings like that. tsumiki was physically bullied and she has bandages all over her design while souda rolls up all his sleeves and has his collar bone exposed while there is no marks on him. maybe he's have some scars from beginner's mechanical mistakes but thats hc territory.

anyways, because of his appearance change, he got some attention from flirtations girls and said that it had intimidated him. i imagine that while he was in his nerd looking mode, he didnt get much attention from the other sex so when they only started approaching him with the assumption he's some punk badass, that was probably a bit overwhelming for him and thats why he has a strained relationship with the female sex. he does kind of sexualize the girls, specifically in the second chapter, but honestly its not really that bad. it kind of even feels a little forced, like he said nanami had "huge jugs" and wonders if this "is what moe gap is" or something like that but he doesnt even say anything about wanting her lmao. the only girl he really shows any interest is sonia, and he mostly gushes about her beauty, instead of her body. not that thats really any better ofc.

he does get along with some of the girls or at least acts normal and not incel-y towards them, like whenever he's angry at saionji, when he felt awkward next to tsumiki or when he made minimaru for owari (though he did mainly do that to impress sonia). when alter ego enoshima suggest putting him between her boobs or whatever batshit crap she said he just yelled he's get crushed, so like. good for him for not being toooo bad. so yeah i do think there are reasons why souda's best friend woudlnt be a girl (for now, at least) and thats why it really is hinata.

and while hinata has other friends, his and souda's connection is special <3 some examples: he is friends with nanami, but they dont really get each other, or at least hinata doesn't feel too connected at her at times cuz shes like a robot and doesnt really get emotions to the full extent. canonically, his and komaeda's relationship is just not... bros, yknow? whatever it is its not "bros". he and souda are bros. i know that he and kuzuryuu consider each other brothers but i feel like while the friendship they have is great, hinata would be more comfortable just letting loose and being stupid with souda. they could connect by being stupid together and distracting one another from the bad in the world by being fun. cuz souda can be fun when he isnt stressed.

but since souda is an emotional character (i dunno if i mentioned this, if u didnt know souda beforehand hes emotional as shit and cries constantly, my beloved) they can get close the two of them emotionally and are empathetic enough to be able to comfort each other. that is, when souda trusts his enough to do that.

thats right. as much as id like to say souda is loyal like a dog, he doesnt really show that in the game lol. because of his experience with his ex friend, souda has trust issues, which i think i already touched upon (idk this is so fucking long im tryna go thru this one topic at a time but good god) and these issues come up in his and hinata's relationship, mainly chap 4. to put it simply cuz honestly the plot doesnt really matter in this context: souda suspects hinata to be a traitor, and because in chap 4 the characters are not allowed to eat, this probably makes him more stressed and causes him to think even more rationally. after the chap is over, in souda's last free time event, he invites hinata to the beach and order him to punch himself.

his actions are really silly here, but basically: hinata shows in souda trust, which makes souda feel like a bad friend, because he couldnt bring himself to trust hinata even though hinata didnt do anything wrong. he feels that their friendship is unfair and that he's the cause of this problem. so i guess he knows he'll get into an argument or a fight because of it, or maybe he wants to give hinata a reason to not trust him so he bring hinata to the beach so they could fist fight. but souda doesnt like to harm people cuz soda is a good boy tm so he asks hinata to do the work for him (which he does not do lol. they communicate and talk like normal friends). this is where souda tells hinata about his past being bullied, after in the last free time event hinata said he could see souda hanging out with the cool kids, so this is where he confides that hes not a cool kid. anyways souda comes to the conclusion that hes more scared of being a bad friend and a coward because of his trust issued that actually being betrayed, and tells hinata that he'll trust him. hooray!

in my mind they are suchhhh good friends. i dont mind shipping souda with a lot of the characters, but it think their friendship is the most important to me. i love them!

now lets get into his relationship with sonia!

i do, in fact, think that his crush on her is fake. i do think he believes in it. but he does not realize that the created a version of her brought on by her general politeness, her status as a princess and her beauty, in his mind that every day strays farther away from the real sonia. he denies her liking of the occult and other scary stuff that turns him off and he acts shocked when she admits to being a virgin (yikes. at least he doesnt really shame her. i think it just ruins his image of her-- again, yikes-- but he ignores it mostly. like he ignores her, the real her, most of the times)

i dont know why he needs a romantic relationship specifically so desperately, but i can think of why he wants that puppy love admiration that he has for her. she, or at least the way he makes her in his mind, is wildly out of her league. sure he wants a girlfriend, but deep down he knows hell never get her. thats why when she turns him down again and again he only gets hurt for like a minute. she even suggests she would rather he be the blackened in the 4th trial and he gets over it pretty quickly. this is the reason he wants to like someone out of his reach so much-- because he cant get hurt from her. he isnt being betrayed or heartbroken like his ex best friend did to him (yes this is about the trust issues again) because he never expected to be with her in the first place. by expecting failure by chasing a girl that is so so out of his league (a pretty perfect princess) he knows what he gets when hes turned down. to him, this is better than actually making an effort with someone he is genuinely attached to because in that case he might actually get his feelings hurt. we see this with his relationship with hinata, though it isnt in a romantic sense. sadly, after they become close friends, he still chases after sonia, but that might be because the player isnt guaranteed to play all of souda's free time events.

this stuff probably will take time for souda to understand. ofc this doesnt really justify his actions and creepy behavior towards her... i like to think that at some point (i constantly forget that dr is a game about killing each other and the apocalypse, but ig this can take place in here too since they both survive) he understands where his problem stem from, maybe with a conversation with hinata or kuzuryuu and he learns and he asks forgiveness from sonia and changes his behavior. the long and hard way!!! my boy did something stupid and he has to make up for it!!!! he will take responsibility because thats what good character writing is!!

itll probably be difficult to come to terms that the girl in his mind, that i do believe he actually fell in love with, is not real. he will cope <3

briefly i'd like to mention souda's and kuzuryuu's relationship i think they are bffs #2 honestly i feel that the both of them plus hinata could be the best trio they are such wholesome guys from all corners of the bro spectrum let the be friends<333 idk maybe even add owari. owari and souda sibling energy <3 this is just hc territory at this point. mioda and souda sibling energy!!!!! for more kuzuryuu and souda friendship read the fic Fuyuhiko and Kazuichi's Guide to Despair Disease: A How-To Take Care of Your Friends(?) Without Spiraling Out Of Control Story. still a wip.

hmmm that was a lot. lets talk about some hcs cuz believe it or not i dont just think of his as what he is canonically, but also what he could be!

ok lets talk about appearances (still canon atm:) he is short-- one of the shortest guys in the cast cuz fuyuhiko and teruteru dont count (thats a plus) and he is, sadly, pretty ripped. it makes since cuz he prob carries heavy stuff and moves his arms a lot for his talent of being a mechanic but when a (male) character is TOO ripped and not for a good reason (for example theres a good reason why nidai or oowada are physically strong cuz of their talents, and some characters are just himbos that deserve it like momota) i just look at them like :|. but it think souda deserves some strong arms <3 he is a cuddler. he would. i just dont think he's impressively ripped. like i think he could sprint fast, but not for long, and that girls wouldnt flawk him for his arms (if they already knew who he was) cuz all in all he is still a wimp loser and he will stay as such, please and thank you.

im a big fan of his narrow eyes. theyre just. dont make sense on him i love it. just like the sharp teeth, he is blessed with looking the opposite of his personality.

now lets talk about post canon appearances! in the world of canon, where the most tragic event in history happens and they were a part of the despair refinements and they live the neo world program (i always forget they dont live in my lil modern day normal aus, ugh), i think he would wake up still looking like how he did in his depair era. idk how long theyre like that but this is my personal hc: hair that reaches his chest, some ugly dulled down pink still sticking to the tips of his messy hair, no hat </3 but his hair is long enough that he doesnt have that hedgehog thing going on </3, no contacts, no glasses, probably scars over his arms and one over the side of his lips like that rio penguin from madagascar (also curse that show for making my tiny stupid child brain think there are penguins in the desert. at least there are such a thing as beach penguins... hmm). i think he would cut his hair to be shorter that it is in canon, a bit longer than hajime's and would resemble saihara's except brown, parted and no ahoge. he wold be dispensation by the length. he would also wear a cap (the normal way) and with his natural colors back, he would look very snuggble :)) he would hug everyone he would be the comfort giver at least to the survivors (this is the part where u realize how insame i am for him lol)

in a world where the end of it didnt happen, i feel like he would feel kind lonely for a while after school, and wouldnt care enough to wear contacts and would go back to glasses, and he wouldnt dye his hair (i just really like his naturality okay i know i said i liked him at first for his colors but this is character growth! he is learning that he doesnt need to be intimidating to get friends!!!) his hair would be a little longer than canon but not by much. i just have this au where he works in an office and there he meets kamukura (who, personality wise is just hinata but depressed) and they become bffs dont at me, and this is how he looks in that au, wearing a button down without the tie and the sleeves rolled up. i do think hed wear obnoxious colors in his free time tho <3

maybe i should get into ships a little? mostly i shipped him with tanaka because i love me some rivals to lovers that isnt angst filled and is mostly just petty. theys either be salty towards each other or tanaka would be very intense in his friendship and souda would be tsundere-ish, not the obnoxious type tho. imagine how denji acts towards yoshida. (denji and souda are actually really alike. before i knew anything about csm my twt mutual told me id prob like denji cuz i like souda and.. well he was right)

but recently i dont really focus on shipping souda with anyone as much as i focus on his friendship with hinata (am i the only one who watched gg compilations and put their faces behind the silly conversations? like i imagine their sprites laughing while the video plays. is that weird? them and also saihara&momota. cuz theyre the same relationship!!! tactful mc and their friendly dumb bro! they!!!). also if u recall i made that drawing of souda with a bunch of ships so its not like loyal lol.

also why are souda and tanaka together constantly in the anime... i think its the end song where theres a slide show of all the characters in class in places like a picnic and the beach and stuff and the two of them are almost together. theyre at the very least friends. that dynamic where they both look intimidating but theyre both so fucking stupid. frienemies. <333 they are so <333 theyd be friedns at least!!! thank you for the anime for realizing that.

i also like to imagine that he and tsumiki would be friends <3 they were both bullied, they both cry a lot and arent really taken seriosuly, at least when it comes to their emotions. i think theyd hug and cry together and be friends :) also as couple they could be very cute.

i dont really know what more to say... i think this is it! i dont know what about kazuichi souda makes me love him so much. he is flawed but not to the point of being unlikable. he is unique but can easily be related to! i care about him so much... the amount of aus i come up and put him in... i dont post so much about him, but know he is my love. ofc i dont have romantic feelings for him some ppl just thirst over their favs i wanna preface that aint the case. not cuz of his age (im close to him in age) but cuz i just... dont feel and romantic or thristy feelings towards anyone so istg if anyone says something stupid to me about that.

thats all! i think this is the longest post ive ever made? when i got this ask last night i thought id write about all those characters i mentioned at the start but then when i went to bed i thought about my answer and realized i have a lot to say lol.

to the one person who actually read until the end, if u even exist (who knows myabe this was for nothing, i still had fun), you're insane. and i hope u have a great rest of ur day. if u didnt know who souda was before this... well u certainly do now (also why did u read this?) sometimes i just gotta rant about something i adore haha. its been a while since i went all out cuz me and my irl dont watch the same shows. i hope i made whoever read this love souda! at least a little!

this post is 5787 words long... im not rereading this

#this post is an investment #kazuichi souda #character analysis #also this is not proofread so expect a bunch of typos haha

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bwunch · 5 years ago

Text

Coming Home

@awolfstory rather liked this story when I gave it to them to critique, so I figured I’d post it. I’m going to try and get back into writing this kind of escapist fiction, as it does rather seem to help keep my happy while I’m writing it. This story is really dedicated to him, but he doesn’t need to know that, now does he.———————————————————————- I checked my watch, although the bell for fifth period had just rung so I knew exactly what time it was. “OK class,” I announced standing up to begin the period, “as I’m sure you all remember, you had a page of notes on act III of Macbeth due today. I’m gonna take attendance, walk around and check that, and then we’re going to watch the movie version of act III and the start of IV. General reminder, please don’t be distracting to those around you while the movie is playing, especially me, as I’ve got quite a lot of work to get finished. I still have 40 essays to grade, so thank you for that.”

I very quickly scanned the room to make sure everyone was here, and then walked around to check the notes. Everyone had done them, for once. I went over to the DVD player that was older than I am, and pressed the power button. It would need a second to work properly, so I walked over to the windows and close the blinds. As I close the blinds on the window in the very back of the room, I notice a car is parked out in the drop off lane. I take no note of it, thinking it’s probably just a delivery for a late lunch. I’ve had many of those, and many more late dinners than I care to admit, delivered to the school. But not tonight. I was determined to get everything done before the dismissal bell rang, so that I could bolt home and finish cleaning before making dinner and waiting for him to come home.

Three years. I think back on the person I was three years ago, and I’m a little shocked he didn’t leave me before signing up for another enlistment. I wasn’t a horrible person, but I was a bit of a wreck. I hadn’t started teaching yet, I was fresh out of college with a little too much debt to be comfortable with. But he stayed, even if he technically did leave. And I miss him every day with every fiber of my soul.

The phone rings, which is a bit bizarre. The phone never rings. That means something must be going on. I make an audible groaning sound as I put down my pen and pick up the receiver. “Dr. Sutton’s room. The doctor is currently out, but I can schedule an appointment to meet with them if you’d like.”

“Oliver, shut up.” replies Nessa, the chemistry teacher from down the halls and literally one of the only people who has saved me from dying of sadness while he’s been gone. “I need to run down to the front office and pick up a delivery from the front office, can you come watch my class for a moment while I do that.”

“Ness, I can just go get it for you.” I say, slightly confused.

“I’ve got to sign for it. Now get your butt over here so that the delivery guy isn’t standing down there all day.” they say. I respond that I’ll be over in a moment in the most exasperated voice I can muster.

“Class, I need to go to Dr. Drake’s room for a moment while they grab something from the office. Stay here, watch the movie, if anyone needs me, call their room. The number is on the sticky note next to the phone.” I say, grabbing my jacket since their room is always frigid.

I head down the hall, hauling 30 some essays under my arm. I enter their room, and they head out. I sit there and continue grading. I check my watch. 20 mins until the period is out. I can get these done in a little over an hour.

10 mins later, the phone rings. What the fuck did they do.

I pick up the phone. “Shhhhh…” I hear someone in the background. The movie is not playing. “Dr. Sutton, can you come down here. There’s been… a problem with the DVD player.” I hear, before people giggle in the background. I swear, these kids.

“Don’t cheat.” I say to the class as I exit the room. I head down the hall. The light in my room flashes off. God damnit.

“What happened!” I say, more out of anxiety than anger. The lights flick on.

And there he is. Sitting right in the front row. Smiling at me. I hear something in the background, but I can’t make it out exactly. It doesn’t matter. The 13 discordant horns of the Apocalypse could be sounding around me, but he’s there, so it doesn’t matter.

I may have started to cry a little bit.

“Hi…” he tries to say before I interrupt him with the most desperate hug I’ve ever managed. He hugs me back, and I definitely start crying. Not an embarrassing amount, but it’s definitely there.

“I love you so much.” I say, before squeezing and letting go. “I have waited so long for that.”

“So have I.” he says. I stare into his bright blue eyes and wonder how if anyone had ever had blue eyes before he did, because nothing compared to that blue. It pierced into my very soul, and carried me like I was floating on the ocean.

“Uhmm… do y’all need a minute?” I hear Nessa pipe up from the back corner.

I stand up straight and remember that all of that happened in front of a roomful of students (and Ness, but they’ve seen me do stupider shit). “Uhh… sorry about that y’all. I’d like to introduce you to my boyfriend. He’s been overseas with the army for three years now. But now he’s home, and I just… god I couldn’t stand to have another day with you gone.” I say, turning towards him. His dark curly hair has fallen more perfect then Donatello could’ve imagined. I hate it so much. I hate how he can just shower, and have it fall so perfectly, have it be so soft. The shit I have to do to get my hair to do that.

“I couldn’t have said it any better myself.” He says, before he begins to dig around in his pocket. “Will you do me the honour of making sure that never happens.” He gets on one knee and produces a small box. Inside it is a ring made of a soft gold. I start crying again.

“Whoa!” exclaims Ness. “Why didn’t you tell me! Is that why you needed their ring size!?”

“I mean… why else would I need it?” He says, still on the ground. There are no words coming out of my mouth. Just tears and gasps of air as I try and make sure this isn’t a dream.

I fall to my knees, wincing when I land on my bad knee. Who am I kidding, they both suck. My worse knee.

I kiss him. I really shouldn’t, being at work and all, but I don’t care at this point. I kiss him deeper. I only stop when I physically can’t breathe anymore.

“Is that a yes?” He says. He’s a fucking idiot.

“Oh my lord, yes you idiot!” I say. He stands up and offers me a hand. At least he’s polite. I take it and pull myself up.

Ness comes over and gives me a big hug. “There, now we won’t need anymore ice cream nights for a while, right?”

I may have spent a lot of money on almond milk ice cream in the last three years.

“No, no we won’t.” I say, putting on the biggest shit eating grin imaginable. I hear a bunch of people start clapping behind me before I hear the bell go off.

“Shit, is that the sixth period bell?” I say.

“Maybe…” replies Nessa.

“Go, get going to your next class. No homework, obviously. If anyone gives you trouble, let them know to call me. Have a good weekend.” I say, shooing out my fifth period kids.

I turn to my fiancé. Gonna have to get used to that. I turn to my amazing, beautiful, charming, stupid fiancé. “You made my kids late.” I say, with a stupid grin. I kiss his cheek.

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godza · 1 month ago

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I HAD A DRAFT IT DISAPPEARED. whatever. 6 for now

1. huo qu may be problematic autistic rep but hes MY problematic autistic rep. "your dna structure is the most beautiful ive ever seen" "all my honor is yours" fuck offff. most romantic guy alive. i also like his husband and his cat but huo qus the best ever i love him and miss him

2. iruma. the conversations me and my roommate have about this boy should be recorded and studied. we have pages of strange jokes about him *slide whistle noise* i turned her into a different person by making her watch iruma, now shes caught up to the manga. her little sister watched it too she likes it a little too much

3. mitsuba. yes. sigh. hes my little bitch baby. ive been with this f slur since freshman year i cant get rid of him. rare fictional character to make me cry. lets kill him a fifth time. does the author hate him (yeah) this is his fourth or fifth time dying how does this keep hapoening to him

4. kipperlilly. IDGAF abt the haters she is just a teenager with anger issues. tell me you didnt know a kipperlilly in highschool. people make toxic yaoi of the men who groomed her but treat her as a villain who acted alone and give her no sympathy. not even her writers gave her sympathy but the seasons treatment of her team is for another day. people are absolutely nasty to her. she was a 14 year old with anger issues, of course she latched onto the first adult to recognize her potential even if that meant doing great evil. if you dont forgive her i dont forgive you. shes not a good person either thats important. she is just a fucked up teenager!

5. yosuke persona four. it is my nostalgia attached to him but i still love him. homophobic homosexual. still mad abt his scrapped romance route but who isnt. get yuri lowenthal back in the studio to finish the job. i miss him hes a shit baby but hes my shit baby. stay in the trash can

6. skip. hell even norman. this whole season was peak but as usual zac was a highlight i think this was his best season. the whiplash of getting absolutely episode 2'd and not even the rest of the cast knowing itd happen. "would you like to introduce your new character" and the character developemnt and his whole plot omggg. the inherent homoeroticism of symbiosis

ok thats enough for now this was getting hard

i cant sleep despite being drugged up do this and ill do it tmrw

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pamphletstoinspire · 6 years ago

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The Death Penalty and the Myth of Closure

Many argue that the death penalty can help survivors move on with their lives. However, this counselor writes that true healing can happen only when we learn to "walk with the pain."

The death penalty has been with us for millennia. If you take the time to read the Old Testament, you will find that the death penalty was widely accepted. We find in the words of Exodus the justification invoked to this day to defend the use of executions: “You shall give life for life, eye for eye, tooth for tooth, hand for hand, foot for foot, burn for burn, wound for wound, stripe for stripe” (21:23–25).

This is known as Mosaic law and is an integral part of our legal system. And yet Jesus came to challenge it: “You have heard that it was said, ‘An eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth.’ But I say to you, offer no resistance to one who is evil. When someone strikes you on [your] right cheek, turn the other one to him as well” (Mt 5:38–39).

What a truly radical notion! In the Old Testament, one sees that violence was a way of life, and execution was a primary tool for meting out justice. But Jesus sweeps that all away.

As with many things Jesus said, excuses have been made and qualifiers added: Love your enemy . . . except when he is a murderer. Then you are justified to kill him, a conclusion that sounds very much like Mosaic law.

Desire for Vengeance Is Real

On the other hand, even if we accept Jesus’ teaching, turning the other cheek is not that simple. I can’t simply say, “Well, Patterson, you claim to be a Christian, so you must love your enemy and oppose the death penalty.” I also understand the desire for vengeance.

Some years ago when I was an Army psychologist, I was tasked with evaluating a man arrested for beating his 3-month-old stepdaughter within an inch of her life on Christmas Eve. It had already been determined that the child suffered irreversible brain damage. As I was interviewing the man, I received a call from the pediatric ICU informing me she had also been blinded. I hung up and told this man that news. He shrugged his shoulders and said, “Oh, well.”

In that moment, I wanted to jump across my desk, grab him by the throat, and beat him within an inch of his life! As I think about him almost 40 years later, I have the same feeling. I am not proud of that, but it also helps me to be sensitive to the feelings of survivors when it comes to discussions of the death penalty. It reminds me to be sensitive to survivors’ need for justice and, possibly, vengeance.

Many justifications for executions set aside the language of Mosaic law and focus on possible benefits for the surviving family. One doesn’t so much hear the word vengeance in such discussions, but one does hear the word closure. A common justification for the death penalty is that it provides closure for the family.

When Boston Marathon bomber Dzhokhar Tsarnaev was sentenced to death, the mayor of Boston expressed the hope that “this verdict provides a small amount of closure.” Similarly, when the decision was made to allow survivors of the Oklahoma City bombing to witness the execution of Timothy McVeigh, Attorney General John Ashcroft stated that he hoped the execution would help survivors “meet their need to close this chapter in their lives.”

Whether executions provide closure depends on what we mean by that word. For most of us, closure implies a completion or conclusion. When a corporation announces store closures, that means those stores are no longer operational. So, in discussing the process of grief and trauma, closure would seem to imply a conclusion—the suggestion that there is an end point to grieving.

This expectation of closure is sometimes supported within a person’s social network. At this time, I am counseling several parents of children who committed suicide. All have commented on encountering, either directly or indirectly, the message “Aren’t you over it by now?”

Think for a moment of the people in your life you have lost. Are you no longer grieving? If I think of loved ones who are gone, I become aware that I may be grieving those losses for the rest of my days. My grief may not be as intense as it was at the time of the loss. But reminders of someone’s absence in my life help me see that grief goes on, that there is no closure in the sense of conclusion to my grief. There’s no point at which I dust myself off and say, “OK, I’m done missing that person.”

The Myth of Closure

In her book Closure: The Rush to End Grief and What It Costs Us, Professor Nancy Berns makes the compelling argument that the concept of closure has emerged within a political context to justify the death penalty and as a “made-up concept: a frame used to explain how we respond to loss.” It has become such a common word in discussions about grief that people assume it exists and is within their reach. In fact, its prevalence reflects the hope we all have that we can heal from the devastation of tragedy and trauma.

For some, closure means the conclusion to a very public process of crime, arrest, trial, and multiple appeals. Anecdotal evidence suggests that indeed the execution provides that sense of closure. But the word closure also implies healing and completion. Evidence suggests that not only does the death penalty not facilitate healing but, in fact, may interfere with it.

In his 2007 study of families of murder victims, Scott Velum found that only 2.5 percent indicated a strong sense of closure resulted from the execution of the murderer. A study published in the Marquette Law Review compared survivors’ reactions in Minnesota and Texas. Killers in Minnesota were sentenced to life imprisonment, an outcome that was experienced as satisfying by survivors. Texas survivors were less satisfied by death penalty verdicts, in large part because of the prolonged appeals process.

As Bill and Denise Richards, parents of a 9-year-old boy killed in the Boston Marathon bombings, wrote in the Boston Globe, asking that the government not seek the death penalty, “The continued pursuit of that punishment could bring years of appeals and prolong the most painful day of our lives.”

Jody Madeira worked with and studied survivors of the Oklahoma City bombings. In her book Killing McVeigh: The Death Penalty and the Myth of Closure, she noted that Timothy McVeigh’s execution did not provide the kind of closure some survivors may have hoped for. As one survivor noted, “There won’t be closure till I am dead.”

The Path to Healing

Are survivors then simply left in anguish, or is some form of healing possible? Perhaps rather than talking about closure, we should be talking about healing.

Sociologist Loren Toussaint suggests that healing is possible through the process of forgiveness. Madeira agrees that forgiveness can help but argues that it is not the only path to healing. This is a delicate topic that must be approached carefully and without judgment. Forgiveness can indeed help survivors heal, but it isn’t that simple. Forgiveness is a process, one that can last a lifetime.

First, let’s be clear on what forgiveness isn’t. Forgiveness does not mean condoning—a distinction relevant to people dealing with someone on death row. Forgiveness does not minimize what was done. The bombings in Boston will never be acceptable. The 9/11 attacks can never be dismissed in terms of the personal trauma. The murder of a loved one will never be OK. After all, the God of my understanding is indeed a God of mercy, but also a God of justice.

Then there is the common phrase forgive and forget. Not only is that often not possible, but in some cases it’s not a good idea. If someone has assaulted me, I may need to forgive that person, but it may not be a good idea for me to invite him or her over for dinner. That person may have no remorse and might assault me again.

The first step in forgiving is making the decision to forgive. The important thing to realize in making this decision is that the person who will benefit most from forgiving is the forgiver. Forgiving frees the forgiver from all the negative venom of hatred and resentment. Essentially, to forgive is to reclaim power from the forgiven. Professor Madeira quotes Oklahoma City bombing survivor Bud Welch as saying about forgiving Timothy McVeigh: “I was the one that got relief from all this pain . . . and it wasn’t about McVeigh.”

Sometimes we confuse forgiveness with reconnecting with someone in a loving way. That reconnecting is a decision that I may make after I have forgiven. I also have the option of not having the offender in my life. In other words, to forgive doesn’t necessarily mean to reconcile with someone.

To forgive means I also have to face all my rage and anger, all my thoughts of vengeance. We can’t sidestep the emotions. I have sat with some people who experienced tragedy or trauma and afterwards stated, rather flatly, “I’ve forgiven that person,” without any acknowledgment of the pain inflicted by that person. This to me is an intellectual exercise, not an experience of true forgiveness.

Learning to Walk with the Pain

In exploring alternatives to the prevalent concept of closure, we also need to broaden our understanding of grief. The concept of closure may have its roots in Elisabeth Kübler-Ross’ famous five stages of dying. That theory has been broadened to include grief. The fifth stage is acceptance. Like closure, this notion has many meanings.

What does it mean to accept the death of a loved one? Again, some kind of finality is suggested, a sort of conclusion to the grieving. I have sat with persons who judged themselves because they did not feel they were finished grieving. Others had well-meaning friends and relatives suggest they should be “over it by now” or that they hadn’t “accepted” the death because they were still grieving.

Over the years I have dealt with many people who came to see me because someone else was concerned about them or, more often, because they themselves questioned whether they were grieving correctly.

I recall one beautiful woman who came to see me after the death of her husband of 50-plus years. She was concerned whether she was grieving correctly. She stated that well-meaning friends had given her a stack of books on grieving. Not wanting to disappoint anyone, she read them all. When I asked what she thought after all that reading, she told me: “I’m completely confused. They contradict one another.”

So what did I do? I gave her a book to read! Only it wasn’t an edition of Grieving for Dummies. It was C.S. Lewis’ A Grief Observed, his journal written the first year after the death of his beloved wife, Joy. The book has no easy answers, and, at its conclusion, it is clear that Lewis will continue to grieve. There is no nice, clean ending. No closure. Only Lewis trying to learn to walk with the pain.

In dealing with losses in my own life, what works for me is to view grieving as a process of learning to walk with the pain. This suggests that, because of a particular loss, my life is changed forever. I am challenged to find a way to move forward living my life as well as possible while at the same time carrying the loss. This is especially true for those who’ve lost a loved one through some criminal act, be it murder or terrorism.

To learn to walk with the pain has several facets. One is to make the decision not to let the trauma define the loved one’s life. It is to affirm that I will not be known as the parent of that girl or boy who was murdered. Rather, I will be known as the parent of a child who touched lives in a beautiful way before leaving life much too soon.

Another facet of walking with the pain is to facilitate the loved one’s legacy. Such legacies may take the form of charitable donations or even the establishment of a charity. Others might establish a scholarship fund. Some get tattoos or plant trees. Such actions don’t make pain go away, but they create a legacy that has some meaning.

For me, acceptance means acknowledging that life is now different, and that I will be walking with this pain until I meet my loved one again in a better place. That may be the only real closure.

By Richard B. Patterson, PhD

#death penalty #myth of closure

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wonderlustlucas · 7 years ago

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warmth - wong yukhei

⇢ prompt It’s like a breath of fresh air on the first day of spring, filling you to the brim with new life and you can't get enough. ⇢ pairing yukhei x female reader ⇢ word count 16k ⇢ genre fluff & slight smut ⇢ warnings oh my GOD the fluff in this killed me, resuscitated me, & then hit me with a car. if you squint really hard there is like a teaspoon of smut & implied s e x ⇢ summary Meeting NCT was definitely not something you or your best friend ever imagined would actually happen on your road to stardom, but Wong Yukhei falling for you never once crossed your mind. Lucky for you, a touch of jealousy, fifteen rounds of Fortnite, impromptu snuggling, and a splash of soju is the perfect recipe for falling in love. ⇢ a/n ok FIRST OF ALL since this is my first actual fic im posting i feel like i should warn u all & apologize for my use of italics, im a little obsessed cuz when i go over & read what ive typed i always put emphasis on specific words so ya just roll w that. secondly i tried sosososo hard to include every member but obviously some got more spotlight than others thats just how the cookie crumbled BUT I TRIED. and lastly the beginning to this is a little rough but i swear it gets better trust me on this, warmth is my bby rn & im proud cuz it gets real good as u keep reading. enjoy:)

“Kim Mina and ___ ___, welcome! Take a seat! How are you?”

Yuna’s greeting is welcoming but it barely calms your nerves. Your grip on Mina’s hand is like iron, but you finally have to let go and give your best smile before shimmying onto the high stool. Mina starts the small talk with the two anchors and you can’t help but silently thank her. Lord knows small talk was not your thing.

Meanwhile, you glance around the large room, taking it all in—from the brightness of all the screens to the professional video cameras facing in your direction and all the way to the small crowd of fans cheering outside. How did you end up here?

“So, tell me, what started this amazing journey the two of you have gotten yourselves into?” Seojun, the second anchor, asks with a beaming grin. You look to Mina and she nods to you in approval. Deep breathe. Don’t panic.

“Well, Mina and I have been best friends, if you’d like to put it that simply, since we were freshmen,” the three chuckle at your comment, “we both shared and bonded over our love for BTS, actually, and then Seventeen, NCT, Red Velvet, and so on.”

You pause to lick your lips and take a deep gulp of air.

“We both weren’t very active nor athletic. First, we played volleyball, then lacrosse, and we even tried golf but sports just wasn’t really our thing. So, we eventually settled for a gym membership and spent a lot of time there together, and over time we really got into shape,” you stop again to laugh when Yuna reaches out to poke at Mina’s very prominent bicep muscle.

“And so one-day junior year we were jamming to, uh, I don't know,” you laugh, glancing to Mina. “BBoom BBoom,” she says, “by MOMOLAND.”

You smile to yourself at the fond memory. “Anyway, Mina randomly suggested that we should learn the full choreography and not just random parts. At first, I laughed at her ‘cause I thought there was no way either of us was bright enough to remember the full thing. But she was so serious about it that I eventually just agreed to it to humor her, and we actually learned it by ourselves.”

“It wasn’t as easy as I thought, though,” Mina interrupts, “it took a really, really long time just to get the footwork and so many times I knew ___ wanted to shoot herself for agreeing to do this,” she laughs and the three of you join her. “But once we got it, we recorded it, and we were just amazed. Like, ‘Wow, we did that! That’s us!’ and we showed everyone we knew. The sense of pride motivated us to do it again. So we did Mic Drop by BTS, and when we uploaded it on YouTube it really blew up within our school,” Mina stops and looks at you to continue.

“Our friends and family really started spreading the word about us after the fourth or fifth video we uploaded. In the meantime, a lot of kids thought we were really weird for, you know, putting ourselves out there like that. But it was just so fun to dance that we really didn’t care about both the positive or negative feedback we were getting. After all, we were only seventeen, you know. But things really started getting serious about two months ago when we uploaded Baby Don’t Stop from NCT U and CLAP from Seventeen. Someone big must have stumbled upon our account because a week later we were in the newspaper. Something about ‘arising local stars,’ I think,” you pause when Yuna shuffles through her papers to pull out the exact article you were talking about.

“Yep,” she pauses to flip through the papers, “‘___ ___ and Kim Mina: Small-town Seniors to Stardom,’ wow, so you two really caught someone’s eye,” she comments as Seojun nods in agreement.

“So yeah, that’s basically it. We still plan to graduate high school and all, but right now we’re not sure if we want to go to college at this point. We have a steady income as of right now and hopefully, we can really make this into a career. It’s kind of our passion at this point, not just a hobby,” you finish, fixing the collar of the rather fitting romper you were wearing.

“Wow,” Seojun comments and brings his hands up to clap, “talk about an inspiring story.”

“Hopefully. We tell our followers that even if you may feel really lost in the world right now, you will find something that you’re passionate about, it’ll just take time and probably some stupid idea,” Mina concludes with a beaming smile and an arm around your neck, tugging you in close.

Yuna and Seojun coo in unison at the affectionate act and you can’t help but squeeze Mina back.

“So, we have a few more questions,” Yuna finally says after you pull away from your best friend. You sit up straighter in your seat and nod excitedly.

“This one’s easy. Who is your favorite group?” Seojun asks once he’s done flipping through the pile of note cards in his hands.

“NCT, for the both of us,” Mina replies easily, and you nod in agreement. “And do you have a bias, as I’ve heard you call it, in the group?” Yuna asks and you immediately feel the heat rush to your cheeks. It wasn’t that you’re embarrassed, you just don’t want to talk about it.

So, yeah, maybe you’re embarrassed.

“Uh-oh, ___ is red,” Seojun catches on and you squawk in embarrassment, having to hide your face from the cameras just so those watching wouldn’t be able to see you flush so badly. “Well, my bias is Taeyong,” Mina replies while soothingly patting your arm to get you to look back up.

“Yukhei,” you eventually squeak out after sitting up.

“Which choreography so far has been you’re favorite?” Yuna moves on instead of picking on your red-hot embarrassment anymore and you quietly thank the gods.

“Oh geez, I can’t choose one. CLAP, HIGHLIGHT, Burning Up, DNA, Cherry Bomb, 7th Sense, Baby Don’t Stop, Boss... all favorites. No way we could simplify it to one,” Mina laughs after naming off a few.

“Alright, last question before the surprise,” Yuna says, winking at the camera mischievously, “if you could go back in time, would you have started this journey earlier than you had?”

You glance at Mina and pause to think for a moment. Would you? Mina opens her mouth to say something but closes it again, clearly stumped by the question.

“No,” you speak up, “I think the way we did it worked out in the best way possible. It started as a joke for us, but the music we love turned it into something we’re passionate about. If we started this when we were any younger, we wouldn’t have been as mature and probably wouldn’t have gotten as much attention as we have. We would’ve looked like even more idiots to the public. It all happened for a reason, and I wouldn’t want to change it one bit, you know?” You rant, picking at your nails as you do so. Was that too much? Too little? Hopefully I didn't sound cocky.

“There you have it, folks! Wise words from eighteen-year olds ___ ___ and Kim Mina!” Seojun cheers and Yuna claps. Mina bows and you smile appreciatively. “Don’t leave just yet! After this commercial break, Mina and ___ will be performing live before the show ends! Stay tuned everybody!” Yuna finally announces and you can finally breathe again now that the cameras are off.

“Go on and get changed, kiddos. Don’t wanna miss your own performance,” Seojun smiles. “Thank you. And thank you for having us. This was amazing,” you reply, hopping off the seat and giving him and Yuna firm handshakes before storming backstage with Mina.

“You spoke so well! What the fuck? What happened to little ol’ ___ stuttering and dying when she has to present?” Mina exclaims excitedly, spinning you into a hug in the dressing room. “I don't know! I just—I have no idea! I felt so, so... proud, you know? Look how far we’ve gotten,” You speak hurriedly, peeling everything off your body.

“I know, this is crazy. I feel like I’m gonna shit myself,” Mina replies as you both unclasp each other’s bras to replace them with sports bras. “Me too. I don’t know why I’m so nervous to perform, we could do this choreo asleep, with our eyes closed, and our legs cut off,” you exaggerate, tugging up your ripped black skinny jeans and hopping around to get them up.

“With our legs cut off?” Mina laughs as she pulls up her denim shorts. “But no, I feel you. It’s because it’s live, we usually have the comfort of knowing that we can mess up without anyone knowing,” she explains as you push your arms through the sleeves of the cropped white tank you decided on.

The two of you finish getting dressed, quickly stretch, and hurry back out before you actually are late. “Good luck, don’t mess up,” Mina whispers, fixing your braids and giving your hands a gentle, reassuring squeeze. “Thanks, asshole. You too.”

Baby Don’t Stop starts from the speakers, extremely loud but too quiet and exhilarating but soothing all at the same time. It’s a natural habit now—the way your body moves to Ten’s absolutely panty-dropping voice and Taeyong’s aggressive rapping—arms twisting in ways that used to hurt and legs reaching new angles every second.

But it’s happening all too quickly—you want it to slow down so you can bask in the feeling of doing what you love for everyone to see.

You find yourself singing along like you usually do, and start to worry that it could be heard. What if you sound like a crow, squawking Ten and Taeyong’s beautiful lyrics? Focus. You mentally slap yourself when you lean over a minute and a half in to scratch Mina’s chin and head. So you keep going.

You always dance Ten’s role—it was something you begged Mina when you chose Baby Don’t Stop as the next choreography you two would learn. Mina had no problem with it, considering she wanted to dance her own bias’ moves.

Two minutes in and you were officially breathing heavier after the last few complicated moves you had to do. Then the transition to Cherry Bomb started and you took a couple much needs breathes before continuing.

These last two minutes of Cherry Bomb you performed were always the hardest, especially since it was mainly beats rather than actual singing or rapping. There were so many movements that needed perfecting, so many angles that needed to be reached, and so many changes that had to be done quickly all had your head spinning.

Your legs are burning. God, they hurt. You can feel the sweat dripping across your neck, down your spine, and into the waistline of your jeans like a waterfall. However, you receive an adrenaline rush sent by the heavens after the first time you have to fall back onto the floor only to quickly lean back up and do a few more grueling flips and tumbles.

After your very difficult part on the floor, you finally rejoin Mina for the last forty seconds to begin your descent to an almost-split before jumping back up and finishing the song.

The loud music is cut off and you are left with only you and Mina’s heavy breathing, blood rushing in your ears, and the loud applause coming from the crew, anchors, and friends and family off to the side.

Oh my God. We did it. You quickly turn to Mina and engulf her into the tightest hug of your life, not caring about the slick layer of perspiration between you. “I’m so proud of you,” you mumble into her neck, giving her one last squeeze. “Of us,” she quips as Seojun and Yuna stop next to her.

“Kim Mina and ___ ___, ladies and gentlemen! Thank you all for watching and have a wonderful night!”

You wave tiredly at the camera and give a weak smile, but all you can focus on is how heavy your breathing is and an annoying bead of sweat rolling down into your asscrack. Seojun and Yuna say something about relaxing for a while in the private lounge upstairs and as soon as you hear water and brownies you’re off, racing Mina up the stairs no matter how badly your legs scream at you not to.

“I can’t believe we did that!” Mina screams, spinning around and making a bee-line for the table full of beverages and food. You quickly yank your sweaty tank off your body, crumble it up in a ball, and toss it at her head. “Oh my God, you’re a disgusting, repulsive, ugly, sickening rat,” she hisses, swatting your outreaching hand away.

You chuckle to yourself as you grab a water bottle, pausing for a moment to grimace at the copious amount of sweat in your cleavage before cracking the cap off of the bottle and nearly inhaling the delightfully cold, refreshing liquid.

“You know, maybe we should just forget about this. I’m so tired of the way you treat me,” you start, finishing the bottle before cracking open another one without even glancing her way.

“___,” she starts to interrupt, but you don’t let her. “Like, the amount of disrespect I get is nauseating,” you continue while reaching for a brownie and basically shoving the whole thing in your mouth. “___,” she says again.

“I just don’t understand. I do nothing but love and support you, clean the house, nurse our children,” you pause to chew on a chocolate chip cookie, “pick up the dog’s shit, for crying out loud! And this is what I get back?” You finally end your sarcastic rant, popping pieces of cut fruit into your mouth before breaking into a fit of giggles.

“___!” she shouts this, and you finally look at her, wondering if you’ve somehow offended her. You follow her gaze once you realize she’s not even paying any mind to you or your shenanigans.

And there they are.

All eighteen of them.

Right across the room.

The water bottle doesn’t make it to your mouth this time but instead falls from your grip and onto the floor. You don’t even notice it, considering all eighteen fucking members of NCT are sitting only a few yards away, their mouths slightly agape and a shocked expression mirroring your own.

You don’t know how long it takes for one of you to finally say something. “Am I hallucinating or is NCT in our room?” Mina whispers.

You blink hard. Rub your eyes. Pinch your skin. “No. They’re there.”

And then you sob. You don’t know what happened, but something within you snaps and a choke sounds from your lips and tears swell from your eyes.

“Oh my God, don’t cry,” someone says and seconds later engulfs you in a hug.

They were here. In the same room as you. Had they watched you perform? Were they invited, or did they coincidentally have an interview here as well? You sob into the jacket of whoever is holding you, your knees buckling beneath you as they hold you.

“Why are you crying?” None other than Nakamoto Yuta asks quietly, his hand placed gently on your head rubbing soothing circles.

You finally pull away and wipe underneath your eyes. When you look up at him you nearly choke again. He’s so beautiful. “I—how? I just—where did you? What the fuck?” You cry again and nearly melt into a pathetic puddle when he wipes the tears from your eyes.

“Should we leave?” Yuta laughs, his hands resting on your bare shoulders. “No!” You shout, too loudly. You look down in embarrassment. “Okay, good. I was beginning to wonder you actually didn’t like us,” he chuckles again, and this time you look at his face and nearly faint when you see his gorgeous smile you’ve spent hours gawking over.

“No, never. I’m just... confused? How—who? How did you guys get here?” You stutter, shaking under his gaze.

“Well, we were kind of notified that you two would be performing our songs and thought it would be pretty cool to surprise you,” a new voice appears. You feel like throwing up when Mark Lee comes into view.

“I don’t—I literally don’t know how to talk anymore. How is this happening?” You whisper to yourself, hoping they don’t hear you but by their chuckles they apparently do. “Sorry we surprised you to the point you practically shit yourself,” another someone laughs.

Lee Je No has joined your little circle now too, and you reach out to the table next to you to stand properly. “Sorry, give me a moment,” you chuckle, not because you find it funny, but because you’re so entirely wound up you think death is quite possible.

After a moment or so of you controlling your breath and the three awkwardly standing there, you finally lean up and look over them again. Calm down, idiot. They’re people. People that you have read smut about way too many times and have cried your heart out over. But still people.

“Hi, I’m ___,” you eventually opt for, reaching out to whoever. Yuta takes your hand first, then Jeno, and finally Mark. They introduce themselves as if it was totally normal. Mina!

“One second,” you quip, shuffling over to see Mina in her own little circle of Park Ji Sung, Kim Jungwoo, Kim Dong Young, and Lee Tae Yong.

She was with Taeyong!

You scan over the rest of NCT some who are in their conversations or awkwardly standing there. After all, it was eighteen meeting two. Your eyes don’t stay on one person for too long, just because your excitement is so overwhelming and you need to see everyone.

Wong Yukhei. There he was. Six feet tall in all his glory, rocking on his heels as he laughed loudly with Qian Kun. “Lucas is here,” you say suddenly and to no one in particular.

Your statement comes off more as a question and the trio laugh. “Well, he is part of NCT, is he not?” Mark asks with a grin. “Shush, she’s going through a midlife crisis over here. You heard her earlier,” Yuta retorts with an elbow to Mark’s side.

“Oh God, did he hear me say that he’s my bias?” You hiss, slapping yourself on the forehead. “Well, we were all watching, so I’d say so by the way he blushed about a hundred shades red,” Jeno says, giving your shoulder a squeeze. He blushed?

“C’mon, you should meet everyone,” Marks luckily saves the day and changes the subject. He reaches for your hand and you take it gently, looking down in hot embarrassment. You aren’t wearing your shirt! You’re mouth forms an ‘o’ as recognition hits you like a train and you let go of his hand to pick up the crumpled shirt on the floor.

Even after you pull the damp tank back on you still feel incredibly embarrassed for having been so exposed to the boys and can’t seem to shake it from your mind until you start meeting everyone.

It’s awkward at first, but they’re all incredibly sweet—sweeter than they are online—and you fit right in. After thirty minutes or so, you’re finally led to the last few members.

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Lucas. What do I say? Act normal? Pretend he isn’t my lock screen or the reason I’ve been up until four in the morning on so many nights? You have yet another midlife crisis and opt to just smile at him.

But you can’t look away. The tall, beautiful, genuine, hilarious, pure, wonderful boy you never in a million years thought would be so close. You can barely breath when his eyes lock with yours and every working brain cell disintegrates.

His lips. They were even plusher and poutier in person and you wanted nothing more than to touch them. His dark hair fell messily over his forehead while a few blonde strands brushed his long eyelashes and you nearly cried at how soft and fluffy it looked. Defined eyebrows, darkdarkdark brown eyes, sharp jaw, and the soft slope of his nose were the only things you were focused on and yet you couldn’t find yourself to care despite the incredibly long staring contest the two of you were having.

“I was just telling everyone that you’re my mini-me,” Ten giggles and it finally brings you back to reality. You look away from Lucas to quirk an eyebrow at Ten’s statement. Just how long were you staring? Long enough to not know what they’re talking about, clearly. “You know,” he elbows you, “you dance my part in Baby Don’t Stop.”

“Oh,” you laugh, curling into him when his arm drapes over your shoulder, “I wouldn’t say I’m a mini you. Nowhere’s close.”

“You’re lying,” Lucas interjects and it takes everything in you to look at him again. “I think you dance it even better than Ten,” he teases and when he laughs something deep within the confines of your heart sparks—it’s a loud, hearty laugh that you swear on your life is the best sound you have ever heard. Your mouth falls open at his compliment and can’t help the hotness that rushes up your neck and onto your cheeks.

“Ouch,” Ten fakes to cry, finally removing his arm to place his hand over his heart. What were you to say? You simply could not form a coherent reply and instead stood there like an idiot, completely starstruck.

Eventually, conversations start to slow down and everyone is sitting, either on their phone or piling junk food onto plants and chowing down. You find yourself gravitating to the empty seat next to Mina and as soon as you sit down, she grins at you.

“What have we gotten ourselves into?” You laugh, toying with rips in your jeans. “I don’t know. All I do know is that I don’t ever want them to leave,” she sighs, and the realization hits you.

They were going to have to go eventually, and no matter how close they lived to you or not, the chances of ever being able to see them were incredibly low. It was like a dagger to the heart, twisting and digging into you as the disappointment settled in. “At least we got to meet them,” you whisper, trying to be optimistic.

“I know, but now that I’ve had a taste, I want the full platter,” she mumbles and you feel like smacking her for having to sound so wise.

Before you can reply, Chenle appears next to Mina and leans on his elbows, wisps of blonde hair falling into his eyes. “Hey, so, would you guys want to come back to the dorms with us? We’re doing a vLive and thought it would be cool to have you guys in it. It’ll be a truth or dare kind of thing with all of us. You guys should come.”

You gape up at him. Go back to the dorms with them? “Could we take a shower?” Mina asks.

“Yeah, of course. vLive can wait,” he laughs, the high pitch of it makes you laugh as well. Mina looks at you, silently pleading to agree.

“I’ll have to ask my mom.”

It took a lot of pleading and begging and fake crying for both you and Mina’s parents to finally agree. After a whole lecture about boys only wanting to get into girls’ pants, arguing that they aren't like that, and making you promise to never leave each other’s sides, you were finally at the dorms.

After Jaehyun guided you both to the bathrooms, you finally got the shower you desperately needed. After shampoo and conditioner, you scrubbed the layer of dried sweat off your skin and simply stood under the warmth of the water. Your muscles were so damn sore, and you were so incredibly exhausted that you feared you would be knocked out and miss out on the fun.

When someone knocked on the door and teased you about taking forever, you started to feel bad and eventually turned the water off. You dried, brushed your damp hair, and swapped your towel for leggings and a black t-shirt that stopped mid-thigh all under fifteen minutes before finally exiting the bathroom.

You hear laughter coming from down the hall and aimlessly follow in that direction, hoping to find your newfound... friends and not walk into some important meeting. Although, who would be meeting at seven o'clock at night?

“___, we got pizza!” Johnny calls from across the room, being the first to notice your entrance. Wow. The dance practice room is even bigger in person? Your fingers trace the mirrors on every wall as you make your way over, completely entranced with the large room.

“Impressive, isn’t it?” Win Win asks, clearly catching onto your awe. “Yeah, I can’t believe how... how big it is,” you gape, spinning on your heels to take it all in again. Imagine how awesome it would be to have all this space!

“That’s what she said,” someone comments, and you look over to see Jaehyun smirking and can't help but laugh at his stupid line. “How original,” you snort while the rest of the boys roar in laughter.

“How did you manage to finish before me?”

You’re surprised when Mina appears by your side but also relieved that she’s finally here. “’Dunno, a lot of weird things have happened today.”

“Tell me about it.”

“Are you guys going to eat or did we order four boxes for nothing?” Taeyong asks and you roll your eyes while Mina mumbles something along the lines of ‘so damn aggressive’ in your ear.

You skip over to the table and grab at a slice while discerning where to sit. Were you to just sit anywhere randomly? By yourself? With someone in particular? This is awkward. Jaemin must have read your mind since he calls you over and pats the open spot on the windowsill next to him.

“Thanks,” you smile, pulling your legs up and sitting crisscross. “So,” he starts, and you glance up at him.

Damn.

Jaemin always had a special place in your heart, so having him right here in front of you made concentrating on one part of his face rather difficult. “So.”

“I thought you and Mina’s whole story was really cool. Since it started as a joke and such,” he says, casually leaning back against the window. “Aw, thank you! As much as it would be super cool to be able to tell people dancing has been our passion our whole life, that’s just not the case. We just lucked out, I guess.”

“Heck yeah, you did. I mean, look at you! It’s a shame you don't sing too—you’d really be a knock-out,” he compliments rather smoothly, crisscrossing his own legs so that your knees were now touching. You couldn’t tell if he was flirting or not, not that you minded, but quickly brushed it off.

“Nana, are you flirting with a girl older than you?”

You look up and nearly shit yourself when Lucas leans against the wall next to you, his muscular thighs just barely pressing gently against your bent knee. “That’s exactly what I’m doing,” Jaemin replies, clearly not fazed by Lucas’ sudden bossy front.

“Anyway, I’m off. Catch me later, yeah?” Jaemin beams, playfully bumping into your shoulder before hopping off the sill and walking away. Leaving you by yourself. With Yukhei.

“Hello,” he greets, his voice deep and his grin wide, making his big eyes scrunch up in delight. “Hi,” you squeak, voice quiet and rather pathetic. “I’m starting to think you don’t like me, ___, and I’m really hurt,” he sighs from his position still next to the wall. Very intimidating for such a soft boy. You take a deep breath. Act normal.

You scoff. “Ah, yes, Yukhei, I’m sorry to break it to you, but I don’t like you.”

“You know you can call me Lucas.”

“I’m aware,” you laugh, suddenly hyper-aware of the sudden lack of space when he leans even closer. “Then why do you call me Yukhei?”

You swallow the thump in your throat and force yourself to look at the boy you have once claimed your undying love for. “’Dunno. I’ll start calling you Lucas if you really want me to.”

“No! No—I didn’t mean it like that. I just—never mind.” Bingo. Finally broke his little facade. “Gosh, Yukhei, you shouldn’t be flirting with a younger girl,” you use his words to Jaemin somewhat against him, and the sudden confidence has you grinning up at him. His mouth hangs open a bit.

Before he replies, Taeyong claps and everyone’s attention is on him. “We’re starting the vLive so if everyone could somehow come over here that would be fantastic.”

You shift off the windowsill after popping the last piece of pizza in your mouth and look up at Lucas, who’s still looking at you with his jaw slack. “Sorry, I’ll go back to being nervous around you,” you tease before bouncing back over to the two sofas.

Despite everyone’s pleas for you and Mina to sit on the couch, you opt for the floor and sit next to Jaehyun who greets you with a heartwarming smile. “Have you ever done a vLive before?” He asks once you’re comfortably settled next to him.

“Oh yeah, we’ve done a few. It’s kind of hard when you’re still a senior and have a shit ton of homework. Plus trying to learn new choreography takes a lot of free time,” you laugh. “I mean, you would know,” you add, hoping to not sound cocky.

“I feel that,” he smiles, moving his arm from between you to rest around your shoulders. You can’t help but smile at it.

“And... we’re on!” Jungwoo cheers, finally moving away from the phone set up on a tripod a few feet away. Everyone cheers and waves so you awkwardly join in, hoping to somewhat seem as if you aren’t freaking out internally.

Taeil, Mark, and Renjun go back and forth asking everyone watching to drop questions along with ‘good dares because we’re not pussies in this bitch,’ as Haechan whispered from behind you. It doesn’t take long for the comments to start flooding in, and you watch from Mina’s phone that a lot of them are mainly asking who you and she are.

“Guys, this is Kim Mina,” Taeyong finally announces, patting her head from his spot on the floor next to her.

“And this is my best friend ___ ___!” Jaehyun shouts, pulling you into his chest. “Woo!” You cheer, your heart ready to burst at his outburst of affection. “If you guys didn’t catch their performance today, definitely check out their YouTube channel. Super talented gals,” Taeyong finishes.

“Except they don’t sing!” Jaemin shouts and you glance back to give him a playful glare.

“Actually, I heard ___ singing my part in Baby Don’t Stop today,” Ten interjects and you want to die. The boys break into a chorus of ‘oooh’s, turning their attention to him. “She’s pretty good, not gonna lie. Not as good as me, of course,” he giggles.

You laugh, more thankful that you apparently don’t sound like a toad from Hell itself when you absentmindedly sing along during performances.

“I found a question!” Yuta hoots. “Mina and ___, are you dating anybody?”

You glance at Mina and break into a fit of laughter. “If we were dating anybody we definitely would not be here right now. Plus no one in our school wants to date us, we’re losers. So no, we’re not dating anyone,” Mina laughs.

“Way to lighten the mood,” Chenle cackles like a dolphin somewhere behind you.

“Oh, I got a dare. Jungwoo, you have been dared to slap Doyoung’s booty,” Jaehyun calls from next to you. Ah, yes. You’d finally get to see Dowoo in action.

After a few moments the two get up and stand right in front of you, and Jungwoo gives the most aggressive slap he could have done that has the whole room roaring in laughter while Doyoung basically cries.

“Mina, someone asked you to marry them, what do you say?” Ten shouts. “Sure! I’ll marry you!” The pretty girl next to you says to the phone, adding a charming wink that has them laughing again.

“Wow, I feel left out on this one. But someone asked that Mina, ___, and everyone from the Firetruck music video perform the first minute of the choreo,” Jeno reads and your eyes nearly bug out of your head. More dancing? “I don't think my legs can take any more moving,” Mina sighs.

“I’m with you on that one.”

“Do you know this?” Mark asks, walking with you to push the tripod back so everyone could fit within the frame.

“Yeah, might be a little dusty though,” you laugh. “That’s okay, so are we,” Yuta reassures before getting into his position. The song begins and luckily it only takes you a few moments for it to come back to you, but the song is paused after at the minute mark even before you can really get into it or break a sweat.

“That was fun,” you comment, sitting back down next to Mina and Jaehyun. His arm goes back around your shoulders and you’re left thinking way too far into it, your heart beating wildly at the older boy’s sudden attachment.

“Truth for Mina again: how are you so gorgeous?” Chenle reads and you watch as her face turns a deep shade of red that has you all cooing at her. “I’m not. But thank you,” she rushes and you smack the back of her head.

“I got a dare! Ha. Jisung, you have to eat a raw egg,” Jungwoo giggles and everyone cries ‘eww’ in unison. “I hate you all,” he grumbles, getting up and jogging out of the room. Moments later the blue-headed boy returns, glass in hand.

“You’re all going to burn in Hell for this,” he says before bringing the glass to his lips and chugging the egg down like a shot.

“Ehhhhhhh, ew, oh gosh, ewww,” he whines second later, his tongue wiggling out of his mouth and his face contorting into a disgusted grimace.

“Dare for ___ and Mina! You guys have to do splits,” Johnny reads, glancing up from his phone to wiggle his eyebrows at you.

“I can’t do a split,” you grumble, stumbling up to your feet. You move away a little and suddenly feel incredibly self-conscious when Mina goes down once and gets it perfectly. Your mouth hangs open. “Yeah, I don’t do that.”

��Try!” Someone hoots and you opt for a straddle since you almost have that during Cherry Bomb. You start to spread your legs, going lower and lower until the muscles in your thighs are screaming. “You got it!” Mina cheers you on, “helping” you by pushing your back lightly.

Instead, you lose your balance and stumble over, groaning when your chin hits the hard floor. “Thanks, stupidhead,” you mumble, your face red in embarrassment because you just face planted in front of NCT and their fan base.

You stand back up and brush yourself off with a smile, trying to seem unbothered, especially when Jaehyun shoots you a sympathetic smile from the floor. You make your way to the table and pour yourself a cup of soda despite the fact that Lucas was right there, ignoring him altogether to avoid another awkward encounter.

But, unfortunately yet somewhat, fortunately, he has a different idea. Before you can manage to walk away, his large hands reach out, attach to your waist, and pull you down until your sitting rigidly on his lap, perfectly set within the space of his chest and the arm of the sofa.

You attempt to not think too far into it, reminding yourself of all the times members randomly pull one another into each other’s laps. But this was Lucas, pulling you onto his lap. Your heart is beating sporadically now, all the blood rushing to your head and goosebumps rising along your skin.

He clearly notices it, too, since his one hand still on your waist squeezes while the fingers on his other trace the bumps on your forearm. You twist your head to look at him. “What are you doing?” You hiss after it finally hits you—people were watching.

“Am I still you’re favorite?” He grins, obviously mocking the question posed by Yuta. “Not right now you aren’t,” you retort, eyes wide when he laughs loud and incredibly obnoxious. Now everyone was really looking.

“Sorry! ___ is just super funny!” He laughs again and your eyes go wide as everyone takes in the scene before them. After they all get over it and go back to the vLive, you look at him again.

“Are you on drugs? What’s up with you? You’re even crazier in person,” you whisper, your voice clearly shrinking when his hands go back to wrap snugly across your stomach. “Not crazy.” Is all he says.

“What, then? Are you suddenly super clingy or something? Or just drunk out of your mind?” You keep egging him on—you need to know what’s going through his damn head. “First Jaemin, then Jaehyun, and then everyone’s whispering about you,” he replies, his voice deep and raspy in your ear.

“Excuse me?”

“Gotta make sure I’m still you’re favorite,” he whispers, smiling innocently against your shoulder. Your mouth falls agape. What the fuck was going on? Since when? How? When did this all happen?

As the vLive dragged on, there wasn’t many dares or questions posed anymore, and everyone was just joking around and talking. At times when both you and Lucas were laughing, you thought you could make an escape but his long fingers became an iron grip on your ribs if you even tried moving. And he was acting so normal; still cracking jokes and making faces and acting like an idiot as if you weren’t even there.

So, you eventually give up and decide you might as well get comfortable, moving around so his hip bone wasn’t uncomfortably digging into you or that you weren’t awkwardly just plopped on his lap. After all, it’s not like your making out with him or doing anything bad. Sitting on laps was a fairly normal thing, right?

And oh God, did he smell like heaven. It was as if sandalwood and peppermint were clouding your brain, and every time you glanced up you got a little peek at his gentle features you had found yourself so in love with when he first debuted. How did you find yourself so close to someone that nearly fills up half of your camera roll?

“Anyway, guys, I think we’re gonna log out for tonight.”

You turn your attention back to the original reason you were even here, heart thumping against your chest and whole body on fire. You cannot concentrate with Yukhei’s body heat warming you head to toe and his breathing against your neck or his occasional laugh, let alone his long fingers spread across the dips of your waist and his thighs beneath your own. You blink until you refocus, quickly realizing everyone was waving and shouting goodbye. With an apprehensive and rather awkward wave, you watch in relief as Taeyong finally ends the live.

You hold your breath—what now? As soon as his grip loosens you’re up, moving a few feet away to stretch and simply breath. Lucas follows after a few seconds, raising his long arms over his head and stretching them with a yawn.

“That was fun,” he says with a smile plastered on his face. You glare at him, not entirely too sure what to say. What was there to even say? ‘Hey man, what the fuck was that?’ or were you to just act normal about it? And what were the NCTzens going to say or do, and how many questions were going to be asked? Hopefully, people wouldn't delve that far into it.

“You guys should always come over when we go live,” he says, rocking on his heels. Oh, was this what we were going to do? Act normal? “I don’t think your fans would like that very much,” you laugh awkwardly.

“Really?”

“Really.”

“I mean, or we could always use more members for NCT. Make it twenty,” he jokes and you truly laugh this time. “Yeah, no. I’m holding out until NCT Antarctica.”

“That would be exciting, you could impress everyone with your almost-there-but-not-really split,” he teases, laughing loudly again. There you go being embarrassed again, face burning red. “Shut up.”

“I’m kidding, I certainly can’t do that,” he says. “Gee, that makes me feel better,” you scoff playfully, rolling your eyes. He gasps. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Hey, I hate to say this, but are you ready to go? I’m so knocked.”

Before you can reply Mina is next to you, pressing her body weight onto your side. “Uh, yeah, I’m ready if you are,” you smile to her sympathetically. “Thank the heavens, I could sleep for a year.”

“Mina and ___ are leaving, guys!” Lucas suddenly shouts and everyone breaks into a chorus of ‘aww’s. Ignoring the painfully obvious disappointment, you and Mina say goodbye to each member, offering a hug and quick exchange of appreciative pleasantries.

“What’s your numbers? We’re adding you to a group chat,” Ten says after releasing you from a hug. “What?”

He beams at you and you stutter your number out, Mina doing the same, and watch in complete astonishment as Ten types them into his phone. “Thanks,” he grins again, bringing you into another quick hug. He and Lucas walk the two of you to the door, and when Lucas wraps his arms around your waist after hugging Mina you feel as if you’re literally flying—physically and emotionally—as he lifts your feet up off the ground.

“Bye, ___,” he mumbles after setting you back down. “’Night, Yukhei.”

“Am I still your favorite?”

“Yeah, don’t you worry.”

Forty-eight hours later when you’re in the middle of studying AP Chemistry vocabulary, you receive a text from a number not saved. When you swipe it open, it’s a group chat full of exactly twenty people, and the only name in there is Mina.

Seventy-two hours later you have plans for Saturday night.

Forty-four hours later, you are sitting on the same sofas from last week, watching NCT U practice Boss while the backup dancers give you and Mina the rundown.

You’re nervous. You’ve done this choreography before, basically have it memorized like the back road you take on the way home, but you never did it as a group. The version with just two people was significantly different; plus having to do it with NCT? You would’ve never dreamt of this in a million—trillion—years.

You spent way too much time watching the dance practice on their channel and practicing it with Mina. Both Jaehyun and Win Win were feeling ill, and although the live could have just been pushed back, Taeyong insisted the two of you came and joined in for ‘shits and giggles,’ as Mark texted.

Thankfully it was just a spur-of-the-moment thing and it wouldn't be uploaded anywhere. But it would be live, which meant absolutely zero mistakes.

Mina squeezes your hand when the two of you finally move to the boys and get in your respective positions, the live already started a few minutes ago. “You ready?” Lucas turns around from in front of you, offering a reassuring smile. You nod quickly, swallowing the lump in the back of your throat and focusing on the positives.

Hey, maybe this would help your future career. Being with NCT for the second time may shine some light on you and Mina and could possibly give you major popularity. Nothing but good could come out of this, you tell yourself.

The song starts and your mind completely goes into business mode, your brain remembering twists and turns correctly until you’re following each part spotlessly, especially Jaehyun’s solo part, no matter how awkward it is looking into the phone all to yourself.

And you can’t help but feel as if your pushing yourself harder simply because Lucas is there with you. Sure, you’re scared shitless of messing up, but knowing he might be watching most definitely gives you a push, even if you don't want to admit it.

But you mess up.

It’s minor—incredibly minuscule that no one besides you probably notices it. Your ankle twists in an awkward angle and a searing pain shoots up your Achilles tendon that has you breathless for a moment. You dance through it though, and the song ends before you even know it.

The only sound throughout the large room is the heavy breathing from everyone followed by a joyous cheer. “That was so fun, holy shit. Dancing with a group is so... so empowering,” Mina stammers with her hands on her hips, breath heavy. You simply nod in agreement, your mind too caught up in how much your foot burns. Fuck.

“Showers and pizza, yeah?” Doyoung asks, running a hand through his dampened hair. Everyone nods in silent agreement before splitting up in different directions in search of a free bathroom.

You wobble behind Mina and it doesn't take her long to realize something’s up.

“You're hurt,” she notes, watching the way you limp. “Yeah. It’s fine. I’ll be okay,” you mumble, shooting her a smile and ignoring the rise of her perfectly sculpted right eyebrow.

But it still hurts, even after your shower.

Simply trying to pull your cotton shorts up your leg is an ordeal and you’re left out of breath once you have them on. Instead of heading back to where everyone else is, you wander through the corridors for the kitchen and once you’re there, you open the freezer in search for an icepack.

“Whatcha looking for?” You practically jump out of your skin at Lucas’ sudden appearance, leaning on the counter. “An ice pack,” you grumble, shoving an ice-cream carton out of the way.

“Yo, yo, yo, no need to get aggressive with the Rocky Road, man. What do you need an icepack for?”

“Foot. Ankle. Tendon. That area,” you reply, lifting your foot and pointing to the now swollen area. “Foot-ankle-tendon, that’s new.”

“Shut up,” you laugh, lightly smacking his hand. “Sorry, sorry,” he laughs freely now, the loud, angelic sound filling the room. He scoots you out of the way and continues digging through the freezer until moments later, he comes up with a beloved icepack. You beam at him in appreciation.

“C’mon, follow me,” he says, linking his arm through yours and leading you down a different hallway. Once he opens the door and flicks the light switch on, you realize it’s his and Kun’s room and your mouth slightly falls open. “Sit.”

You do so quietly, watching from his bed as the tall boy rummages through a dresser and seconds later whips out an ace bandage. “I can do that, you know,” you laugh awkwardly, ogling at how his beautiful face scrunches up in concentration as he kneels down and begins to snugly wrap the whole area.

“You can also call me Lucas,” he retorts, pinning the bandage in place and kicking his door closed. Your heart beats faster now. “Oh my God, what’s wrong with calling you Yukhei? Unless you truly don’t like being called that,” you laugh as he plops down beside you and turns the television on. Your heart settles.

“No, I don’t mind. I’m just not used to people I’m not super close with calling me Yukhei,” he admits while flipping through channels. “Oh. I’m being honest, I’ll call you Lucas from now on if you want.”

“I’m teasing, you can call me anytime,” he looks over with a wink, but then his face falls, “wait.”

You genuinely laugh at him this time, watching as he frowns. “How did you forget the whole beginning to that pun?”

“I don’t know. Shut up,” he snickers, then tosses the remote down next to your leg with a huff. He quickly turns to you and you look expectedly at him. “Have you ever played Fortnite?”

You laugh again. “I’ve played mobile but never Xbox or PlayStation,” you admit, watching joyfully as his eyes light up. “Can I show you how to play? We can do duos. We have two TVs, Kun and I usually play together. I mean, only if you want, you don’t have to, but—”

“Yes, I’ll play!” You interrupt, your mouth truly hurting from laughing as the beautiful boy in front of you rambled on. “Really?” He beams.

“Really.”

“Oh my gosh, this is probably the best day ever. I’ve never been able to teach anyone how to play, it’s really so fun, well you said you’ve played before so you know, but still. I feel so bad for all the girlfriends in the world who don’t play and just get annoyed ‘cause they're really missing out, you know? I’m so happy you’re somewhat experienced though, that kind of makes this a little easier. But, ah! This will really be fun,” the tall boy goes on and on, and you simply listen with a smile on your face as he sets up the two screens.

“Oh, gosh, I’m sorry, I got super excited. I promise I’m not that weird,” he chuckles uncomfortably, looking at his feet while the Fortnite screen loads. “Pfft, don’t be sorry. And that wasn’t weird at all; super cute, actually,” you smile, surprising even yourself with your blunt honesty. The pink hue of his cheeks darken and your stomach leaps—you did that!

“Okay, this is just the lobby so I can show you some stuff before it actually starts,” Lucas says, sitting back on his bed and scooting to lay back against the wall. He passes you a PlayStation controller and cups your hands in his. “Okay, this is to move,” he demonstrates and you look up to your screen and back to his fingers.

He goes on and on from explaining the simple goal of the game to shooting, jumping, crouching, and so on, but in all honesty, all you can focus on is his soft hands on yours. Luckily once the game starts you sit in comfortable silence aside from random comments about finding a chest or ‘there’s a shield over here,’ until, alas, there are only twenty people left and you encounter another duo.

The two of you break into a chorus of shouts, warning each other and groaning when you mess up. Your aim isn’t horrific, but definitely not amazing, and you’re wasting ammo terribly. When you have to reload, the opponent shoots you dead and you drop your controller with an annoyed sigh. Seconds later, he dies as well.

“Sorry, that was my fault,” you grumble, wiping your now sweaty hands on your t-shirt. “Don’t worry, eighteenth place isn’t too shabby for your first duo,” he reassures you and sets his controller down.

“Are we going to play another?” You inquire and he raises a thick brow in response. “Do you want to?”

“Um, yeah!”

You play fourteen more rounds, ranging from fiftieth, seventeenth, sixth, and sometimes even fourth place. On your last round, however, Lucas dies and leaves you to battle the last duo.

With a clever jump while reloading, you’re able to quickly kill one player and when the last player hides behind a tree, you find the perfect angle and come in first place.

“Oh my God, we won! You won!” Lucas hoots, shaking you by your shoulders until you’re cheering with him. “Yes, yes, yes!” You shout, grinning ear to ear. “I’m so proud, now you can tell everyone I’m the best Fortnite tutor ever,” he brags, running his hand through his hair and you have to keep yourself from drooling.

You check your phone. 9:47 PM. You’ve been in here for two hours. “I think we’ve played enough for tonight,” he chuckles, turning one television off and switching the other to cable. Now what? Should I leave?

“Holy shit, Zootopia is on,” he suddenly gasps and you look over to see him wide-eyed. “I thought guys weren’t supposed to like stuff like this?”

“We’re not supposed to,” he shrugs, looking over at you with a wide grin, “but I can’t help myself.” You don’t reply and instead sink lower into the mattress, fixing the pillow behind your head in order to get comfier. You keep going back and forth from watching the movie and sneaking glances at Yukhei in his red sweatshirt, hood up and hiding most of his face. Regardless, you can still see strands of his soft hair falling into his eyes and the outline of his lips and begin to feel dizzy by something so incredibly simple but still so breathtaking.

Your eyes begin to grow heavy and burn from the brightness of the television compared to the darkness of the rest of his room and you force yourself to blink hard a few times to keep them from fluttering closed. Don't fall asleep now, he's so close. He was leaning his weight on you, slightly slumping on his side with his arm and thigh pressing against yours and you could feel him breathing.

You blink again, but you don’t open them right away this time just to give them a rest. A few minutes won’t hurt, right?

You quickly fall asleep to Nick Wilde telling Officer Judy Hopps that she needs to give him that pen.

Warmth.

That’s exactly what you wake up to—you can feel warm sunlight dancing on your bare arm and face as it shines shamelessly through the curtains, the white duvet tucked up to your neck engulfs you like a hug, and overall warmth surrounds you on this lovely morning.

Never getting up, you think to yourself, or maybe you even grumble it, you don’t know. You sigh softly and curl your arms and legs tighter around your body pillow, pressing your face against it and breathing in the familiar scent—

Wait.

You inhale deeply again. Sandalwood and peppermint.

Sandalwood and peppermint?

Your eyes are open in a millisecond, but you quickly squeeze them shut in fear of that what you think you saw isn't what’s actually there. You force yourself to peel an eye open again and nearly vomit at how breathtaking the view before you is.

“Yukhei,” you finally breath, barely audible, testing to see if he was up. He doesn’t budge or flinch or sigh—nothing. He stays asleep, his breath softly fanning over your chest from where he lies. The same soothing sunlight warming your skin makes his honey skin gold, and his eyelashes cast soft shadows across his cheekbones while his lips are just so pouty you aren't even thinking when your hand leaves his side to trace his Cupid’s bow.

If your phone was in reach you’d take a picture right then and there and selfishly keep it to yourself, something no one else could have because it’s your memory to keep. But you can’t seem to move. Instead, you stay still, memorizing every plane and curve of his face because you know nothing will ever be as ethereal as what you see right now.

One, five, ten minutes later, you have no idea nor do you care, you realize you should leave. This wasn't right, as much as you hated to admit it. Your heart was completely on the line here and you weren't prepared to be utterly heartbroken in the long run.

You start to shift, slowly, barely an inch at a time, further from the comforting warmth radiating off his body. You’re closer to the window now, and once you detach his remaining hand, you can easily lean up and make your escape.

You shakily reach for his long fingers spread across the small of your back and gently slide it off and lay it on his pillow.

Yukhei groans into his soft pillow and you freeze, hoping he’ll just turn away but no—both hands come back this time, reaching for your body. And once they find your waist you’re being pulled back even closer now.

He sighs against your collarbone and you start to melt. “Don't go. You’re so warm,” he breathes, turning his face so that his cheek lies flat on the center of your chest. “I think I should.”

“No, shut up,” he mumbles back, completely locking his muscular arms around your back.

You huff in defeat and rest your hands around his shoulders. He seems to already be back asleep, so you absentmindedly run your fingers through his hair you've been dying to touch and practically cry when he hums in response. So you continue to, gently scratching his scalp and untangling the ends until he's softly snoring against your collarbone once more.

Your heart genuinely aches—you can feel it in your chest, months and weeks and days and hours of adoration for the boy clinging to you swelling from inside and out and you cannot comprehend that you're even here with him. What did this mean? Friends who have only met twice and randomly texted throughout a single week did not share a bed, let alone spend the morning like this.

You sigh, mainly out of guilt but also sadness—you wanted to wake up like this every morning, stay up every day the way you had, fall asleep with him beside you every night. But would it happen? It was incredibly unlikely and you wanted to sob.

You huff again, pushing your thoughts into another corner of your brain and deciding to just relish in the moment now. You wiggle further down until finally, you’re face to face with perfection himself, his nose just barely brushing your own.

You close your eyes again, hoping maybe you’d fall back asleep and when you wake up again he wouldn’t be there anymore.

“I knew you wouldn’t leave.”

Your eyes are open in a flash, widening at his words and at the fact his own were staring at you intently. “Only because you asked. And you’re very comfy,” you admit, hoping he wouldn’t see right through you. “So I’ve been told.”

“Oh, yeah? By who?” You can't help but ask, not only were you curious but you genuinely wanted to hear his raspy morning voice again. “Oh, you know...” He trails off, and you’re not aware of his hands on your waist until they start tapping against your skin.

“Jungwoo?”

“Yeah, Jungwoo,” he breathes, nuzzling his face back into the crook of your neck and you can’t help but notice that he inhales deeply. “You alright?” You ask gingerly, placing your free hand back on his head and playing with an oddly darker strand of hair.

“Mhm,” he hums against your skin, “comfy. And you smell good.”

Your heart jumps over hurdles at his words and you’re so entirely grateful that he can't see the way your cheeks burn. You stare at the wall for the next few minutes in silence, your mind blank until he starts to breathe heavily and you can only assume he’s fallen asleep once more.

You must have fallen back asleep as well because when you open your eyes again the tall boy isn’t next to you, but sitting on the edge of the bed and prodding you awake. And by prodding, you mean attacking your sides and tickling you until your mind registers the dull pain.

“Stop, stop, stop!” You cry, leaning up and tearing his hands away. “I’m up, I’m up. Jesus,” you hiss, leaning against the wall and smoothing your hair.

He’s grinning so big you fear his face might break. “Sorry, you wouldn’t wake up so I had to do it the hard way,” he laughs.

“Did you try saying my name?”

“Yeah.”

“Poking me?”

“Yep.”

“Oh,” you sigh, “sorry. I guess I was really knocked.” He laughs. “Don’t worry about it. I would’ve let you just stay there all day but your phone was blowing up,” he explains, standing up and stretching. He’s already dressed, so when you check the time you aren't surprised to see that it’s noon.

Mina has texted you nineteen times. Some are from last night simply asking where you were, then calling you out for leaving her alone with Jeno, followed by texts from this morning calling you ‘such a thot and you know why’ and ending with something along the lines of ‘Taeyong isn’t my bias anymore;)’ and you’re laughing.

“What?” Lucas asks and you just show him, watching his expression grow until he’s laughing too. “I feel bad, I stole you from her,” he chuckles, running a hand through his hair. How were you supposed to reply to that? “That’s okay, she’s left me all by myself at parties plenty of times, this isn’t a big deal.” You notice the way his face falls but brush it off when he smiles softly and sits down beside you. “Good. How’s the foot feel?”

“Uh, better, I think. I haven’t walked it yet so I’m not sure.”

Goosebumps rise along your limbs the second he reaches for the white blanket and his knuckles brush your skin and you just pray he doesn’t notice. You watch silently as he unwraps the bandage and presses the skin around your ankle. “Well, it’s not nearly as swollen so that should be a good sign, right?”

“I suppose so,” you laugh, twisting your ankle in his gentle hold. Luckily there’s no major pain so you shimmy off the bed (as much as you don’t want to) and stand up, testing your weight as he watches on. “I think it’ll be okay.”

“Phew, thank Jesus,” he smiles, getting up as well and swinging the door open. “There’s still some leftovers from breakfast if you want some,” Lucas says as you walk down the corridor to the kitchen. Jisung and Haechan pass you on the way and when they wiggle their eyebrows, all you do is smile and look down at your feet.

“Breakfast sounds amazing.”

When you enter the kitchen only Mina and Jeno are in there, sitting on high top chairs at the counter. Mina sees you first and her eyes light up. “___! Look who decided to wake up!”

“Sorry,” you laugh, “I was super tired I suppose.”

“Mhm, I wonder why,” Jeno smirks and your mouth falls open. “NO!” You and Lucas shout at the same time and Mina and Jeno break into a fit of giggles. “We played Fortnite all night. And watched Zootopia,” you grumble, smiling appreciatively when Lucas passes you a plate.

“Is Fortnite a new code for f—”

Lucas glares at Jeno angrily and he quickly shuts up, turning to Mina with a grin. “When did that happen?” You scoff, pointing between them. If they were going to play like that, so would you.

“Well, when you two disappeared she was all alone so we hung out and even practiced Go,” Jeno retorts back. You roll your eyes in defeat and hold your plate out as Lucas spoons what’s left of scrambled eggs and toast on your plate. “Thank you,” you beam at him.

You eat in relative silence except for the occasional snicker when Lucas leans over to show you a meme on his phone. After helping to clean up, you and Mina finally deem that it’s time to leave and say goodbye to whoever is out and about in the dorms.

You find yourself wrapped in Lucas’ muscular arms once again and you can't help but feel at home in his warm embrace. Discreetly as possible, you scrunch his sweatshirt in your palms and breath in his alluring scent, praying, hoping that this won't be the last time you’ll ever be so close. “Text me, okay?” He mumbles in your hair.

“Yeah, sounds good,” you smile, finally pulling away from his hold.

And so you do. You’re lying in bed, fresh out of the shower on Tuesday night with all homework complete and Mina on FaceTime.

“Jesus Christ ___, just send it. You slept in the same bed for crying out loud,” she hisses and your face flushes at the recent memory. “Okay, okay. I’m sending it.”

9:53 PM - To Lucas: hey yukhei!!

“Oh gosh, I sent it,” you gasp, tossing your phone onto the floor and smacking your face. Mina looks at you with a raised eyebrow from the screen of your laptop. “I have to tell you something.”

Now, this makes you look up, completely forgetting about the text. “I hate that sentence,” you say, but luckily she doesn't seem too fazed. “No, it’s not bad. Well, kind of. I don’t know,” she sighs, worrying you, “remember when I texted you saying Taeyong isn’t my bias anymore?”

“I’m guessing you weren't just joking around?” You ask slowly.

“I wish. Well, when me and Jeno were hanging out all night I hadn't really realized until he was talking all philosophical to me just how cute he was. And once I did, I noticed how hardcore he was flirting,” she rambles, never looking directly at the camera, “so while you were sleeping in the same bed as Lucas I was, you know, flirting back, and we uh—we kissed. And then he apologized for rushing and I said that I was sorry too and, well, now we’re going on a date tomorrow!”

Your mouth falls open. Mina and Jeno? “I—wow. I don't know what to say,” you laugh, “that’s amazing!”

“You think so?” She’s beaming like a little girl on Christmas morning now. “Yes! While Taeyong is a god, he’s way too old for you while Jeno is our age. Plus, he’s a sweetie so I support.”

“Oh, gosh. He’s such an angel. He’s so adorable and so funny but if he thinks a joke is rude he always apologizes and God, he’s so sweet,” she goes on and you can't help but smile for her. Your phone dings from the floor and Mina stops to smirk at you. “That might be him!”

You squeal, leaning off your bed and picking up your phone.

9:57 PM - To You: Hello ___ !!!

“Oh my God, he replied,” you squeak excitedly, bouncing excitedly. “Yes!” Mina shouts and you can’t help but laugh. “Ask him how he is.”

9:58 PM - To Lucas: how are youuuu

“So yeah, I guess we’re going to have to double date now,” she giggles and if she was next to you, you would have smacked her. “I don’t want to mess this up, you know? It’s still so unreal to me,” you sigh.

“I mean, you’re already pretty good friends with him and you had a major snuggle session, plus I think you’re both whipped and should just marry now,” Mina says and you laugh at her honesty. “Ah, yes. Marriage is always the answer.

10:01 PM - To You: Im doing better now, how are u?:))

You can’t help but squeal again. “Anyway, I’m going to go. I still have to do these god-forsaken note cards,” she sighs, waving her blank cards dramatically, “have fun talking to your boyfriend. Text me if anything juicy happens.”

“Okay, I will. Goodnight sweaty, love you.”

“Love you too shithead,” she giggles before hanging up and you close your laptop to finally head to bed. Or, lie in bed while on your phone.

10:03 PM - To Lucas: im swell. school SUX tho

10:03 PM - To You: Aww I’m sorry, is something wrong?

10:04 PM - To Lucas: no, i just want to be out of there and live my life u kno?

10:04 PM- To You: Yeah, I understand:(

10:04 PM - To You: I have a question

10:05 PM - To Lucas: sure

10:05 PM - To You: Is my bed comfier than urs

The butterflies in your stomach are becoming painful now, stirring such emotions within you that you feel as if you might just explode. You’re grinning like an idiot, too, typing back quickly just so the conversation doesn’t die.

10:06 PM - To Lucas: it depends. theres a few factors that could change my answer

10:06 PM - To You: Such as?

10:06 PM - To Lucas: whether you would be there or not

You have to bite your lip to hold back another squeal of excitement. Where did this confidence come from and how did you just say that? You can’t believe you actually texted it and hope it’s as smooth as it sounded in your head. You could only pray he would flirt back.

10:07 PM - To You: Idk how to reply back smoothly but I hope u know Im smiling like a dork rn and Kun is making fun of me

10:07 PM - To You: How do you do that???

10:08 PM - To Lucas: <33

10:08 PM - To Lucas: do what?

10:09 PM - To You: Everything you say or do makes me smile. And idk why like even when u told me to shut up I couldn't stop grinning. Or when you pretend to be disinterested and lie so I can't see how u actually feel. It makes me smile and I feel weird when Im around u

You can't breathe at his text. Your head is spinning and you have to read it three times to actually comprehend that Wong Yukhei sent that to you.

10:10 PM - To Lucas: i could say the same ab you. you make me feel all warm and fuzzy inside

10:10 PM - To Lucas: gosh, was that too much? sorry

10:11 PM - To Lucas: sorry for always being a mess around u. u still make me nervous

10:11 PM - To You: Yeah. Me too

10:11 PM - To Lucas: really?? u hide it really well

10:12 PM - To You: Yeah man. U make me really anxious. In a good way. I know you won't but I always get scared you'll think im a weirdo

10:12 PM - To Lucas: i could never

10:13 PM - To You: I don't know how to end this conversation now Im too happy but Im super tired and I have practice tmrw

10:13 PM - To Lucas: hm. well. how bout one of us says goodnight and then the other says it back ?

10:14 PM - To You: Clever

10:14 PM - To You: Goodnight ___💗💗

10:14 PM - To Lucas: gnight lucas❤️

You don't fall asleep for another half an hour, your mind buzzing with excitement and affection for the boy who still is your lock screen.

Saturday evening Ten calls you. “___!” He shouts, nearly deafening you.

“Hello!” You shout back.

“I know it’s last minute but I have an invitation for you and Mina,” he’s still talking excessively loud but you find yourself not minding but just grinning at his clear excitement. “Ooh, an invitation for what?”

“If I’m being honest, an invitation for a terrible hangover and quite possibly things you’ll regret. But no, seriously, a friend of Johnny’s friend is having a big ol’ party in his disgustingly large frat house for the end of the semester and it’s open invite. So,” Ten explains, “some of us are going and thought, ‘Hey! Let’s invite our bestest pals Mina and ___!’”

A frat house? A party in a frat house? This would be a precursor to every party ahead of you if you do in fact go to college.

“We’ll be there.”

You should have mentally prepared yourself for this kind of party. You aren’t a very big high school party-goer to begin with, so when you entered the large house with Mina at your side you couldn't get over the sheer magnitude of it all.

Everything was extra—from the extravagant chandeliers and metal railing along the marble stairs to the large rooms seemingly bigger than your own home, to the swarm of sweaty students bouncing to the incredibly loud music, and even to the amount of liquor on counters and tables and the intense smell of hormones.

It was quite suffocating at first and you found yourself clinging to Mina, the extrovert between the two of you, and followed her around like a puppy. Eventually, you warm up after two drinks she passes to you, starting to feel more relaxed in Mina’s navy bodycon dress she forced upon you.

“I think I see Jaehyun!” She shouts in your ear even though you can hear completely fine. You watch against the counter as she jumps up and down like an idiot, waving her arm to catch his attention.

You’re even more surprised when it works. You can tell the gears are short-circuiting in his brain until recognition finally lights up his features and he smiles brightly. He turns for a moment, but then looks back and waves you over.

“Oh, sweet Jesus,” you sigh, downing your fourth shot in a weak attempt to wash all your insecurities away. You slowly follow behind Mina, hopping along to take your heels off so you don't end up embarrassing yourself.

“I didn’t know you guys were here yet!” Is the first thing you hear and it’s Yuta, standing up and grinning beautifully before enveloping you in a hug.

“Surprise?” You draw out once he pulls away.

“C’mon, everyone’s downstairs,” he continues, intertwining his fingers with yours and leading you through the crowd. “Who’s everyone?” You ask on your descent down the steps. “Ugh, well. Me, of course. Taeil, Johnny, Tae, uh...” he trails off, “everyone but Dream members.”

You want to ask if Lucas was there, of course, but you also don’t want to seem clingy and instead kept your mouth shut. After all, you had been texting quite a lot and he never mentioned if he was going tonight. Poor Mina, you think, Jeno won’t be here and their date went well.

“God, he’s already staring and we just got down here,” Yuta mutters, and it takes you way too long to process what he means. “Who?”

“Yukhei. He hasn't stopped talking about you since last week, and now you’re here when he’s been drinking? You’re in for a ride,” Yuta explains as you near the group, but you already feel the anxiety blooming inside your gut. “What does that mean? What do I do?” You hiss, walking slower now.

“I dunno. That’s something you gotta figure out,” he says with a shrug, tapping your forehead with his free hand. You swallow the lump in your throat and just nod, your head suddenly throbbing and you’re not sure if it’s from the soju or what Yuta just told you. Or the fact that Yukhei looks like a whole meal and he’s staring at you just the same way.

Your stomach flips as he scans you head to toe and back again, from your bare legs, up to where the navy lace stops at the expanse of your thighs, to the way the dark material hugs deliciously at your waist and dips sinfully to reveal cleavage that could give a nun a heart attack.

And you can't take your eyes off him. Why did he always have to look so... so good? He could wear a trash bag and still look like a model.

He’s in regular denim skinny jeans that, although he’s sitting, show off his thick thighs and leave absolutely nothing to the imagination. The white, long sleeve tee he’s wearing has a low collar and you can see his collarbones and the way his Adam’s apple bobs. His fluffy hair is messily parted down the middle to show off his forehead and his eyes are so dark you feel as if you suddenly can't breathe oxygen and can only survive off him.

You don’t know how long you’re staring at him until Mina accidentally bumps into you on her way to sit down on the carpet, shaking you from your thoughts. “You good?” You ask each other at the same time. She laughs obnoxiously, the alcohol in her system already in effect.

“I’m good, but are you good?” She asks knowingly, twitching her head in the direction you were just entranced by. “Yeah, just peachy.”

You don't know if you really are good, but what you do know is that that was the hottest checking out experience you had ever shared and can't shake the feeling of excitement setting fire to your nerves.

“C’mon, sit. I’ll get you a drink?” Yuta speaks up again, finally letting go of your hand and moving it to your back to walk you over to an open spot on the couch. “Um, yeah. Sure,” you smile, trying to brush away the feeling that Lucas is still staring, “thank you.”

He only beams back in return before he’s off, and you’re left sitting between Taeil and Kun. “How’s the party so far?” Taeil shouts from beside you and you’re fairly surprised that he initiates small talk, considering you haven’t spoken with him much. “I don’t know, to be honest,” you answer, realizing your throat is going to be dead by the end of the night with how you have to shout, “I’ve only been here like, fifteen minutes. And I’ve never been to a place so big!”

“Really?” He asks, clearly surprised.

“Yeah, not really a party person. High school parties are always in smelly basements and all there is is cringey rounds of truth or dare, spin the bottle, or seven minutes of heaven.”

“Still happens in grown-up parties, sorry to tell you,” he laughs, pausing to take a sip of whatever’s in his cup, “it’s okay though, it’s always fun no matter what we do.”

“I can tell. Except I feel like I’m going to go deaf,” you exaggerate, spinning to look at the monstrous speaker on the wall. “At least they play good music,” Taeil replies and you shrug, “I guess. It’s probably better when your dancing, though,” you say, turning back to him.

Yuta returns moments after that, holding out a cup and you take it and smile appreciatively. When you take a sip, you practically choke on how strong it is but swallow it anyway with a grimace. Once the burn goes away you take another sip and deem it’s not as bad as you initially thought.

“Jesus, slow down before you give him a heart attack,” Kun hisses in your ear, and you glance at him with widened eyes. “Who? And what about me? What if I have a heart attack?” You joke.

“I swear you’re clueless, but I’m hoping that it’s just alcohol shutting down your brain,” he sighs in defeat, “Lucas, of course. He looks away for one second and then when he turns back you’re doing something that surprises him.”

You roll your eyes. “What, am I not allowed to drink?”

“Well, you are underage. But no, seriously. I can tell he thinks it’s hot. Plus, I can practically smell his jealousness from here,” Kun replies, side glancing for barely a second before looking back at you. “You should have seen him when you walked down holding Yuta’s hand.”

You swallow, suddenly feeling guilty.

“Don’t worry about it, he’s not one to stay pissed. He’s obsessed with you already,” Kun smiles, but hides it by taking a sip from his cup, “but hey, next time you sleepover, warn me? Please? I walked into our bedroom the other night and nearly shit myself when I saw you wrapped around him.”

“Sorry, I probably would’ve shit myself too,” you giggle and when something moves out of the corner of your eye, you frown to see Lucas walking away. “He’s getting away,” Kun sings and you look back to him in a panic. “If I follow him I don’t know what could happen,” you sigh honestly.

Of course, you want to go after him just to talk to him privately, but Lord knows what could happen when you have liquor in your system.

“Bullshit! Don’t let that stop you,” Kun smiles, slipping his hands to your back and shoving you to your feet. You sigh, finally standing up and chugging the rest of your drink. “Do I look alright?”

“You look stunning, stop worrying. He went upstairs, probably to piss. Go get ‘em, tiger,” he replies, and you smile and lean back down to squeeze him in a hug. “Thank you,” you whisper, and then you’re off.

You don’t know if it’s the sudden buzz in your brain or not, but going up two flights of stairs leaves you way too winded and dizzy then it normally does. You lean against the wall to catch some air while scanning over the crowd from a higher view. C’mon, where are you?

“___?”

You practically jump out of your skin when he says your name and slides his hands around your waist, tugging you around to face him. “Ha. Hi Yukhei. I was just looking for you,” you gulp, suddenly losing brain cells with him being so close again.

“You were?”

“Yeah, I thought we could, um, catch up. Or something,” you chuckle awkwardly, mentally slapping yourself for being so nervous again.

“Actually, I have something to tell you,” he suddenly says, standing taller and you feel so small when he does that. “You do?” You squeak, afraid it would be something terribly disappointing or terribly heartwarming.

“Yeah, c’mon,” he says, reaching for your hand and guiding you to an open door. Luckily it’s not a spare bedroom but just the bathroom and you can’t help but sigh in relief once he’s locked the door and flicked the light switch up.

“So, we recently had a meeting with our managers and stuff,” he starts, and you can’t help the quiet ‘oh’ that slips from your lips. That was not what you thought he would be talking about.

“What?” He stops, a look of worry crossing his face.

“Oh, oh. It’s nothing. I was just, ugh,” you pause, racking your brain to say the right thing, “expecting you to say something else.”

“I’ll get there in a bit, don’t worry,” he smiles softly, bumping into you until you’re pressed against the sink and straining to look directly up at him now, “just listen to this first, yeah?”

You nod quickly, your throat completely dry and brain on fire with his body so flush against your own. “Anyway, we were talking about backup dancers, for the most part. And it occurred to me that we don’t have any female backup dancers. So I asked why and they kind of just... ‘I don’t know’ed it, you know?” He explains, and you genuinely have zero clue where this is going. You nod anyway.

“So Taeyong asked what they thought about hiring some female backup dancers. Like, long-term jobs, not just a one-song-and-done. And they kind of did a little manager huddle and said why not and to let them know of anyone we know so they can do auditions and stuff,” he goes on, and by now you can’t think straight. He hasn’t said it yet, but what if?

“We all thought the same thing, but I said it first and, so, I told them about these two girls I know and how talented they are and how, well, sweet and smart and genuinely amazing they are. And pretty, but that’s beside the point. So I showed them some videos and stuff. Anyway, that’s not important,” he pauses to lick his plump lips, looking at you directly now, “and so they said that if you and Mina came in and auditioned it would be a delight to have you on the team. If you want, of course.”

You don’t know what to say, do, or think. You’re hyper-aware of his large hands cupping your face, index fingers rubbing soft circles beneath your ears but also still have the weight of what he just said sinking into your brain. You don’t know whether it’s the alcohol or simply shock but no words come out, your lips staying parted in complete and utter surprise at such a bombshell.

“I don't—I can’t,” you stammer, shaking hands gripping his shirt to steady yourself, “thank you. Fuck. Thank you, thank you, thank you. Holy shit. Oh my God. I don’t know what to say, holy fucking shit.”

You’re breathless, slumped against the granite and nearly pulling the lanky boy down with you. “I have more to say,” he says, quieter this time. You gulp, eyes searching his face. Still, you can’t comprehend anything besides you and Mina may have just fallen into one of the best opportunities of your life.

“Okay,” he sighs softly, his large hands still cradling your face. “My first thought last weekend when I woke up with you beside me was ‘Fuck, what did I just get myself into?’ but when you said something about never getting up and whispered my name in that scared little voice I nearly lost it,” he goes on, eventually looking away from your face and fiddling with the lace material on the neckline of your dress. He suddenly looked incredibly innocent and you wanted nothing more than to hold him once more.

“And then you didn’t leave, even though I know you wanted to. But it suddenly felt so right, you know? Like everything that had happened that night ended with such a perfect morning,” he sighs, glancing up for a second to check how you were taking it all so far. When you offer him a warm smile, heart beating wildly against your chest, he returns it with pink blush adorning his cheeks.

“I thought you felt it too, but then later when I woke you up you had said it wasn’t a big deal, and I was so sad because I thought it was. I mean, how often do you play fifteen rounds of Fortnite, share the same bed, and wake up cuddling with someone you don’t have feelings for? And then I got even more confused when you texted me during the week, and fuck, everything you said had me smiling at my phone and Kun was making fun of me,” Lucas goes on, never stopping to breath until now.

“So, my question is, what are you thinking? Because I know I was your bias, or whatever the heck you guys call it before we met, and you still act nervous around me. And those texts and even this is not something just friends do. And you look so damn kissable right now, and while I want nothing more than to kiss you, I won’t in case that’s not what you want,” he finishes, his voice noticeably lowering as he tentatively leaned closer, his face and nose and lips only mere centimeters away.

You swallow once more, finally letting the reality of his words hit you. You swipe your tongue over your lips once, just in case, and he glances down just in time to catch it.

And that’s it.

He quickly surges forward, and the cord holding you together suddenly snaps when his lips are finally on yours. It’s like a breath of fresh air on the first day of spring, filling you to the brim with new life and you can't get enough. You both are doing nothing but everything at the same time, hands not knowing where to go but stinging skin in their wake. His lips make it impeccably wet and messy, teeth and tongue, but you don’t care, and your hands finally find the collar of his shirt and yank him to come closer, allowing his tongue to finally swirl with yours and you feel as if you’re drowning in him and the way he tastes and feels. It’s like sunlight in the morning, washing over your skin until it’s warmed all the way to your very being.

After what feels like an eternity you pull away, your head swimming with the fact he just kissed you. He leans back, breathless but seemingly more alert now, blunt fingernails digging into your bare thighs. His eyes scan your face again, searching for any trace of regret and when he finds none he comes back for more, kissing you softer this time. It’s so raw that it hurts, adoration and admiration flowing from the depths of your heart and you can’t fight it anymore.

You’re practically limp against him when his warm lips move from your lips to your jaw, down the column of your throat and to your bare chest. “God,” he breathes, moving back up to suck the delicate skin on the side of your neck between his teeth before going back with his tongue to sooth the pleasant pain, “I didn’t know if I’d be able to wait any longer to kiss you.”

Your head lolls to side as he continues his ministrations against your throat, completely lost in his touch. Your grip on his shirt finally slackens and you finally find the confidence to slide your hands under the fabric, leaning into him so you can further trace the expanse of his torso.

“Stop,” he suddenly hisses, pulling away to grab your wrist, “you’re going to give me a terrible boner and I’m not fucking you in this dingy house.”

His words made your stomach squirm even at the possibility and he clearly notices, lips quickly finding yours and hands holding your waist once more. You’re almost too busy trying to slip your tongue within the confines of his mouth to notice his right hand slowly descend until it’s resting between your thighs, pushing them apart and you gasp into his mouth.

You feel his mouth quirk into a sly smirk and can’t help but smile too, that is until his fingers slip past the hem of your dress and brush against the cotton of your underwear.

He breaks away and laughs at you when you whimper at the loss of contact. “Don’t frown,” he mumbles, keeping eye contact even as his fingers drag agonizingly slow along your clothed folds and it’s the most sensual thing you might ever experience.

A loud knock on the door quickly interrupts your faintest of moans and you suddenly feel incredibly exposed. “I swear to God, if you two don’t get out of there soon, we’re leaving without you. We’re going home, they ran out of Malibu and that’s apparently the only thing Jaehyun likes!”

You swallow, looking away from the door and back to the panting boy leaning on you, irises blown out and lips pink and plump.

“Do you want to have another sleepover?” He asks quietly and you can’t fight the smile that tugs at your lips.

"Oh my God,” you wake up with a low groan escaping your lips, a headache throbbing painfully in the refines of your skull as soon as you gain consciousness. Is this what a hangover felt like? You sigh, squeezing your eyes to shut out the sunlight. You turn away from that direction only to not-so-gracefully bump into something.

By the entanglement of limbs and bare skin pressed flush against yours, you can only assume something is actually someone and everything from last night crashes back, your headache increasing tenfold. Your eyes are open in a flash, not because you're scared or regretful, but just to make sure you were correct. And safe, not in some stranger’s bed.

Just like last week, Wong Yukhei is beside you, cheeks flushed pink against his warm honey skin and lips pouty as always. Except, this time, he’s awake, lying on his side and staring at you with wide eyes full of something you could only pinpoint as adoration.

“Hi.”

“Hi,” he replies, and not until now do you notice his hand on your very, very bare hip. “Do you want something for your headache?” He asks, voice low before leaning inches closer and pressing a chaste kiss to your forehead. “Yeah, but I can wait—”

You don’t get to finish because he’s already rolling out of bed, taking most of the sheets off of you and you’re left completely naked, forcing you to grasp for the white duvet crumpled at your feet to cover your body.

Except, not that it matters, because he’s incredibly naked too, and you’re amazed at how tall he is when he’s like this, no matter the circumstances. You quickly look away in fear he’d catch you staring, a blush working its way up your cheeks as you suddenly become aware of the pleasantly dull ache throbbing in your abdomen.

He’s back at your side moments later, this time with pineapple print boxers on, holding out a half-full water bottle and two Advil’s. “Thanks,” you sigh, swallowing them quickly.

“This wasn’t just a one and done thing, right?” He asks suddenly, and you look up at him where he’s leaned against his dresser, fingers tapping the edge. You could quite literally cut the tension between the two of you and suddenly want nothing more than going back to sleeping in his arms.

“No! No, I hope not. I mean, unless you want it to, in that case, I’ll go n—”

“No, please don’t go! I just wanted to make sure, in case... in case I completely misread this whole situation,” he sighs in relief, finally moving away from his dresser and rolling back into bed beside you. “Did you mean everything you said last night?” You say quietly once he’s settled and pulled you back against him.

“Of course.”

“Okay,” you let out a sigh of relief, reaching up to play with a strand of his caramel hair. “I’m sorry, too. For when I said this wasn’t a big deal. I didn’t realize that you—you felt something. For me. Which is dumb, because it was kind of obvious. But it’s kind of scary assuming things when it comes to someone who didn't know who you were when you’ve been in love with them for months,” you talk absentmindedly now, not realizing the words are spilling out of your mouth until they’re already out. After all, you were a NCTzen before any of this and there was no way to avoid that when it came to your love for not only him, but the rest of the group.

“I knew who you were,” he laughs above you and you glance up in confusion, quirking an eyebrow. “One of your videos came up on my recommended one day and I was kind of obsessed with you guys since,” he admits and it’s by far the cutest thing you have ever seen.

“No way.”

“I swear on my life,” he grins brightly, wrapping his muscular arms around your back and pulling you up beside him so you were face-to-face. It’s quiet again, and you find yourself once again tracing the outline of his face; his defined eyebrows, big doe eyes, his cheekbones, his chin, his lips—everything.

“What now?”

“Well, we probably should have gone on a few dates first and fallen in love, even though I’m already full of adoration for you already, and then I would’ve asked you to be my girlfriend and then we would’ve had mind-blowing sex. But we kind of went backward and already had the mind-blowing sex, so how about grabbing lunch as our first date? I mean, even though you’re a younger girl.”

You’re grinning like an idiot now and can’t help but kiss him. It’s soft and gentle and sweet and makes everything inside of you warm and fuzzy only because it’s him.

“Okay, I like the sound of that,” you whisper against him, kissing his cheeks, his nose, his forehead and finally his velvety lips again, “only because I’m full of adoration for you too.”

After all, Wong Yukhei was the warmth you so desperately craved for and needed in your life.

294 notes · View notes

sandersmusicalmarvel-blog · 7 years ago

Note

If you could hook me up with some freakin romantic Prinxiety Roman angst with that fluffy happy ending and CUDDLES that would be g r e a t

Heck yeah! Get ready for some Prinxiety hurt/comfort!

Warnings: hospitals, comas, major character injury, mention of hospital equipment.

——————————————————————

Roman paced the brightly lit hallways anxiously. Ghosts of tears tainted his cheeks. He needed to see him. He’d never forgive himself if… No. He couldn’t think like that. Virgil was going to be fine. He was the strongest out of all of them, at least mentally. He was going to push through.

A doctor ran out suddenly, looking stressed. “Friends and family of Virgil Sanders?” He asked, Roman stood. Patton and Logan were out getting food for Roman, who hadn’t left the hospital since Virgil had been declared comatose, which was four days ago. Logan was shocked the hospital let him stay.

“Yes?” Roman asked impatiently, he needed to know how Virgil was. He’d been waiting for an update for hours.

“You can go see him now. He seemed to be jolting in his sleep earlier but we made sure he was ok.” The doctor spoke, Roman nodded gratefully and followed the doctor as quickly as he could to Virgil’s room.

He walked in to find the little storm cloud hooked up to multiple things. IV’s, heart-monitors, oxygen machines. He knew if Virgil were awake, he’d be on the verge of a panic attack by just looking at it all. If that sight didn’t break him, looking at Virgil’s pale, sickly features certainly did.

The doctor left him alone with Virgil. He gasped as he grazed his hand up Virgil’s arm, shocked at how cold it was. He held his hand tight as tears began streaming down his face for what had to be at least the twenty fifth time that day. He angrily wiped his tears on his sleeve.

��Virgil wouldn’t want to see you like this, you pathetic excuse of a Prince. Be brave. For Virgil.” He muttered to himself. What hurt him most was the knowledge that it was his fault Virgil was in this state. If he hadn’t been so careless throwing that jar, Virgil would still be with them.

He needed to stop thinking like that. Virgil wasn’t dead. He couldn’t die. He just couldn’t. There was still so much Roman needed to tell him. So much he hadn’t said.

“V-Virgil? He stuttered out. Virgil please wake up. I need you.” He said, as his tears turned to sobs. “V-Virgil please!! I’m so sorry! I need you! I NEED YOU!!” He sobbed louder, nearly choking “I-I love you Virgil.” He said, sobbing defeatedly, sinking to his knees.

Suddenly Roman felt Virgil’s fingers slowly begin to curl around his hand, he looked up in disbelief before immediately jumping to his feet, staring at Virgil. Then Virgil’s body began to thrash and twist wildly, Roman’s eyes widened.

“DOCTOR!! DOCTOR! HE NEEDS HELP! PLEASE!!” Roman pleaded, immediately letting go of Virgil and screaming at the top of his lungs, suddenly a small team of doctors ran in the room and immediately went to stabilizing Virgil, one stopped, turning back to Roman.

“Sir you need to leave.” He stated with an extremely serious tone, that was tinted with stress, Roman’s eyes widened at that.

“NO! NO IM NOT LEAVING! I NEED HIM!-“ Roman screamed, the doctor continued to argue with him until-

“WE’RE LOSING HIM!!” A doctor yelled, with a calm edge, that sent rage coursing through Roman’s veins, how could she be so calm? The love of his life was dying! The doctor arguing with him immediately started helping the others, after about 5 minutes the doctors stopped, all turning to Roman, who was shaking from fear.

“He’s waking up.” One of the doctors told him. Roman gasped, and started crying again,

“THANK YOU! THANK YOU SO MUCH!” He said, hugging each of the doctors, who were shocked to say the least, they smiled at Roman and left him alone.

Virgil was stirring and reached out for Roman again, who blushed and promptly grabbed his hand. Virgil’s lips curled into a weak smile and his eyes slowly began to open. Roman was smiling brighter than the sun. He tried to be as patient as he could, giving Virgil all the time he needed.

After what felt like an eternity, his eyes finally opened, he smiled lazily at Roman. “Hey there, Princey.” He said, his voice rough and scratchy. Roman’s sobs became joyful, and he wrapped his arms around Virgil, being careful of the machinery he was hooked up to.

“I’m so sorry! I need you! I can’t live without you!” He said, crying into Virgil’s shoulder, Virgil smiled and hugged Roman as well as he could.

“I forgive you.” He said smiling. Roman’s face went crimson as he pulled away.

“There’s something I need to tell you, Virgil.” He said, voice wavering, Virgil smiled comfortingly but with confusion, and urged him to keep talking. Roman took a deep breath.

“When you were in a coma, I couldn’t eat, I couldn’t sleep, I didn’t leave the hospital once, Patton had to nearly force an energy bar down my throat.” He paused and Virgil chuckled at that image. “I guess what I’m trying to say is, I can’t live without you, Virgil. Every time you smile my stomach does gymnastics. Your laugh is more beautiful than any song I’ve ever heard. These last few days have been the worst of my life, not knowing if you’d- I can’t live without you. I-I’m in love with you Virgil.” Roman said, Virgil’s face went redder than Roman’s sash.

“I love you too, Roman.” He said, slightly dazed from all the medicine coming from his IV. Roman pressed a quick kiss to his forehead. Before standing up straight.

“I should let you rest.” Roman said, smiling, Virgil gasped and grabbed his hand.

“After all that you think I’m letting you leave? Well sorry Princey, but you’ve got another thing coming. You need rest.” Virgil said, pulling Roman in bed next to him and kissing his cheek. Roman smiled, his face becoming a deep shade of red.

“Goodnight, Sir-Sing-A-Lot.” Virgil whispered.

“Goodnight, my love.”

#prinxiety #angst #fluff #sanders sides #roman sanders #virgil sanders

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sublimeperfectionland · 7 years ago

Text

New Moon of the Dark Kingdom Chapter Hundred and Forty Three - A Spider in the Ointment

Zoisite and Kunzite have found true love, but when some old friends, a vengeful god, and a pair of evil twins are gunning for the Shitennou all at once, life is not going to be easy

[Scene Metalia's inferno. A pair of glowing blades appear in Kunzite's hands]

Kunzite: I CAN'T TAKE THIS! I'M GOING OUT THERE TO KILL THOSE TWO LITTLE MONSTERS ONCE AND FOR ALL!

Metalia: Without magic? Against thousands of armed youma?

Kunzite: YES!

Metalia: Oh great. My idiot son is going berserk again.

Kunzite: I AM KUNZITE! SOVEREIGN OF THE EARTH, SUPREME RULER THE DARK KINGDOM, AND FIRSTBORN SON OF METALIA! I WILL NOT ALLOW HER TO BE MENACED BY A PAIR OF FIFTH GRADERS!

Metalia: [oddly touched] You care about me that much?

Kunzite: OF COURSE I DO!

Metalia: You know, I was going to let the Death Phantom kill you. I told your brothers I was bluffing, but I wasn't. I would have watched you die and felt absolutely nothing, except for the satisfaction that I'd cheated that old windbag out of what he really wanted.

Kunzite: OF COURSE I KNEW THAT! I KNOW YOU BETTER THAN ANYONE!

Metalia: [touched] In spite of that you still want to protect me?

Kunzite: LOVE ISN'T SOMETHING THAT IS EARNED! IT IS SOMETHING THAT IS GIVEN!

[Metalia thinks about this]

Metalia: This...love...I have never felt it. I've watched it makes fools of people and considered myself lucky, but maybe there is something to it...Do you love me more than your monkey?

Kunzite: DON'T BRING ZOISITE INTO THIS!

Metalia: Answer the question.

Kunzite: YOU ARE MY MOTHER AND HE IS MY HUSBAND! THE FEELINGS ARE COMPLETELY UNRELATED!

Metalia: But if you have to choose...?

Kunzite: IF YOU MAKE ME CHOOSE I WILL CHOOSE HIM!

Metalia: You admit that?

Kunzite: YES MOTHER! HE IS THE ONLY SOURCE OF HAPPINESS IN MY LIFE! IF YOU TOOK THAT AWAY, IT WOULD SOUR THINGS BETWEEN US FOREVER!

Metalia: Huh.

[Meanwhile, at Seattle General. Mamoru has his face in his hands and is rocking in his hospital bed.]

Rei: Look, I'm not trying to be a bitch or anything, but we're running out of time. Artie wants me to tell you that if we're to save the world, we need to get moving.

Ami: [looks up from her handheld] We should try this without him. There is a .59 probability that Selenity's teleportation factor was linked to her essence rather than her powers.

Usagi: Just a minute. [Sits on the edge of Mamoru bed and clasps his hand] Can't you see how much he is hurting? I'm not leaving him like this.

Makoto: [looking out the window at the green maelstrom] Hurry. A storm is coming. I feel it.

Minako: [Looking in her compact] Let her speak. Artie said we still have time.

Usagi: [holding Mamoru and stroking his hair] Please, Mamoru. You have the heart of a hero. You're going to help us, whether we need you or not. Not as a favor. Because it is the right thing to do. For you and for everyone else.

Mamoru: [panicked] I know that. You think I don't know that? You don't understand. I can't work for the same side as Beryl. I can't. Not against a pair of kids she's probably tortured since infancy.

Ami: What indication is there that they've been tortured?

Mamoru: They're traveling through time to kill their mother so she can't give birth to them. They've been tortured!

Usagi: We're not doing this to help Beryl. We're doing it to help everyone else. Especially those kids.

[Mamoru shakes his head in derision.]

Rei: Enough with the kumbuya. We need to go.

Usagi: Rei. Stop being so mean! [To Mamoru] I mean it. What they are doing will destroy them. There has to be a better way-

Mamoru: What if there isn't? We don't know them, what right do you have to judge them like that? What if they need to die to keep from growing up into evil monsters like their mother? Why should we mettle when we don't even know who they are or what they've been thorough?

Usagi: Because, just like you said, evil is a choice. If they chose to be good, they can be good. It might not come as easily to them as it does for us, but nobody is beyond redemption. Not them, not Beryl, not even Metalia-

Mamoru: [even more frantic] You sound like you did back in the Silver Millennium. Right before Beryl killed you.

Usagi: Beryl's different now. They all are. I've seen them change, especially Kunzite. He is different now that he has Zoi. I don't think he enjoys being evil anymore-

Mamoru: Zoi threw a spear through me and laughed while I was dying. I don't think it was Kunzite who changed!

Minako: Look. I hate to break up such a tender moment, but Artie said time's up. We need to get moving. [closes the compact] Everyone link hands. We'll try this without Mamoru.

Mamoru: No... I'll help...just not willingly.

[Mamoru and the girls all join hands]

Minako: Rei, you will need to guide us.

Rei: Artemis said the twins are in a magic free zone. I'll get us as close as I can, but then we will have to run.

Mamoru: [Pulls his hands away in a panic attack] I can't do this.

Minako: You have to.

Mamoru: I know...Just...Grab my hands!

[Usagi and Minako seize Mamoru's wrists]

Rei: Ready?

[They close their eyes and concentrate, only to be interrupted by a knock on the door.]

Nurse: Time for some meds.

Mamoru: Oh. Thank god.

[The nurse wheels a metal cart in and prepares a syringe]

Minako: Sorry, but now is not a good time. Could you maybe come back in an hour?

Nurse: [not even pausing] If you can get his surgeon to sign off on it.

Mamoru: No. Let her medicate me. This will go lot smoother if I'm sedated.

[The nurse pokes the needle into Mamoru's IV line]

Nurse: This is going to feel all warm and tingly.

[Almost at once Mamoru's face goes chalk white and he stares straight ahead in absolute shock.]

Nurse: Mamoru? Are you ok?

[Mamoru doesn't answer, but keeps staring straight ahead, a choking noise forming in his throat. His vitals are going haywire on the monitors]

[The nurse pulls the needle from the IV line]

Nurse: Mamoru?

[He keeps staring straight ahead]

[The others turn to see a tall and elegantly dressed young redhead in the doorway]

Beryl: Mr. Chiba. Would you mind if I ask you some questions about the attack at the hotel?

#new moon of the dark kingdom

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ofstaffs · 7 years ago

Text

rey: rey will be like 'ah..... so UR the one my best friend is fucking but like not right'

steve: or peggy

rey: rey will be like 'wait is that a mirror nope ur a different person ok hi'

steve: u know vision could pick up the mjolnir so why cant rey

steve: she got the force

rey: REY SHOULD DO IT WITH EASE AND STEEB AND TORE WOULD JUS T BE THERE LIKE '........wut'

rey: and then shes like 'hAH tricks on u ive got the force, bitches'

steve: can rey and ben join the avengers thx

rey: rey would ruin all the undercover stuff

steve: GUYS http://www.cinemablend.com/new/An-Avenge...

rey: she cant work the sweatshirt, sunglasses, and hat

rey: bYE

thor: the instant steve announced the challenge, thor tore his way through the ballpit and lunged after him, mere seconds behind. the very first tunnel proved to be a challenge in and of itself, however. huffing out a frustrated breath, thor awkwardly half-shimmied, half-crawled through. "these tunnels weren't made for asgardians, that much is clear." by the time he finally made it through the other side of his fifth tunnel, his chest was heaving with exertion and the sides of his arms were bright red from squeezing through the tunnel walls. "i surrender," he called out grudgingly. without warning, he collapsed onto his back in the middle of the tunnel, thankful that this one was at least made up of some type of rope rather than the hard plastic of the others.

thor: rip thor

thor: CROSSO VE R OH MY GKSL

steve: rey drag him with ur jakku junk dragger™

thor: LOL nah she can just climb over his corpse it's ok

steve: I WAS TRYING TO FIND A PIC OF THE JUNK DRAGGER AND I FOUND THIS http://media1.popsugar-assets.com/files/...

rey: rey immediately got into competitive mode as soon as steve brought up the challenge. within moments, she was crawling through the holes and squeezing past crevices with ease. scavenging in small areas helped with that, along with her tiny body. unfortunately, an irregular diet helped with /that/. but finally she slipped through the last tunnel and came out victoriously, holding her arms up. "i win!" she grinned happily. then she laughed as she saw that thor was stuck, and moved quickly to him, placing her hands on her hips. "maybe if you weren't so strong, this wouldn't be happening," she teased.

steve: LIKE OMF

rey: no shell just go cuddle him

steve: IT LOOKS SO REAL

rey: WTF I THOUGHT THAT WAS REAL AT FIRST

thor: OH DANG WTF

thor: IT DOES LOOK REAL

steve: steve took a seat in the cube area that connected two tunnels, letting rey pass him up. even for a super soldier it was really hard. he got a glimpse of thor laying in the center of a rope tunnel. as soon as rey announced her victory, steve found a slide by the next tunnel up. he even slid down it defeatedly. "i'm too old for this." the avenger mumbled as he got to the bottom of the slide, which ended a few feet from rey. if laser tag included narrow passages, then he would be on his way to the area where the parents sat earlier.

steve: cap is #done

steve: i love how thor and steve can beat the fuck out of huge robots and space dragons but fail at playgrounds

rey: LOL I LOVE THEM

rey: ok i think kayla passed out and im about to too rip

rey: well def continue tomorrow tho omg

steve: same

steve: night!!

rey: night fam

steve joined the chat 21 hours ago

thor was timed out 19 hours ago

thor joined the chat 15 hours ago

thor left the chat 14 hours ago

steve joined the chat 12 hours ago

steve: im lowkey here

rey was timed out 9 hours ago

rey joined the chat 8 hours ago

rey: I'm low key here now omg

rey: i should be around for a little while

steve joined the chat 8 hours ago

steve: hello!!

rey: HELLO

steve joined the chat 7 hours ago

rey: HI

thor joined the chat 6 hours ago

thor: I PASSED OUT LAST NIGHT RIP ME

thor: thankfully, thor recovered swiftly. he had no intention of navigating his way through the godforsaken tunnels to get out, however. "my strength is not the problem," he informed rey, eyes glinting as he realized exactly how he could escape this monstrosity. rolling over onto his stomach, he grabbed hold of the ropes directly below him and forcefully pulled them apart. they surrendered easily to his strength, the tunnel giving out underneath him in a matter of seconds. landing in a crouch, he shot rey a grin. "see? these fragile midgardian materials cannot hold the mighty thor."

thor: thor has no chill tbh

steve: im dying

thor: don't die omg what will america do without u???

thor: RAI WHERE R U

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rey: IM SO SORRY I WAS AT A GAME RIP

rey: IM MOBILE FOR A BIT

thor: IT'S OK OMG DID U HAVE FUN

rey: YAS SO MUCH

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thor: WAIT WHAT KIND OF GAME WAS IT

rey rey giggled in admiration as she watched thor literally rip the ropes apart, and land in a crouching position. then she met up with steve and shook her head. "no..." she complained dejectedly, reaching her hands out to him. "we-we still have the trampolines. and-and laser tag!" she grinned, hoping to get his spirits up.

rey: I MANAGE FOR BOYS VOLLEYBALL AT MY SCHOOL

thor: OMG REALLY?? THATS SO COOL

rey: YA ITS FUN

thor: i suggest a rey/thor laser tag team-up against steve

thor joined the chat 109 minutes ago

rey: YES PLS

rey joined the chat 93 minutes ago

rey: iM HERE ON A COMPUTER BLESS UP

thor joined the chat 90 minutes ago

thor: NICE 2 bad steeb's missing :////

rey: fml ik

rey: i messaged mia tho

thor: gosh does she have a life or something?? RUDE

rey: yA WTF IS UP WITH THAT

rey: IM GETTING TO THE MEME U SENT ME NOW RIP

thor joined the chat 87 minutes ago

thor: OMG OK BUT DONT KILL ME WITH CUTENESS AGAIN THANKS

rey: NO PROMISES THO

thor: OH GR8

rey: brb dinner ayy

steve: HEY BITCHES

thor: aYYYYY IT'S STEEB THE DWEEB

steve: steve hoisted himself up from the slide, joining rey and a crouching thor. he had no idea what a laser tag was or why they'd let children play it, but he proceeded to agree anyway. the laser tag facility was unlike anything he had ever seen. the room was pitch black, aside from the various neon obstacles and graffiti on the walls. there were staircases leading to ramps above the floor. there were guns, presumably 'lasers', lining the wall next to the entrance. steve grabbed a laser, before tossing two to rey and thor.

steve

http://youtube.com/watch?v=8pmB7nlC9mI

i watched this shit

thor: omfg i admire ur devotion sm

thor: thor caught the weapon effortlessly, though he held it slightly away from himself in wary consideration. it appeared to be of the same style as most other midgardian weapons, yet they were used for games? reminding himself that steve was the one handing them over – so it couldn't be /that/ harmful – he wrapped his hands more securely around the gun in preparation for battle. leaning close to rey, he murmured, "join forces with me?"

thor: rip steve

steve: https://49.media.tumblr.com/e0a9dce6eefe...

thor: LMFAO

thor: get out ben, this ain't ur battle

steve: if ben found out this was happening he would be like http://66.media.tumblr.com/a95daaf244c20...

thor: LOL BEN OMG CALM DOWN

rey: IM HERE

rey: IM H ER EE

rey: FCK

thor: FIN ALLY

rey: HUSH

thor: NO

steve: HI

rey rey followed steve up the stairs, making sure thor was there behind her, then giggled excitedly at the pitch black play area. she carefully caught the laser gun he tossed her, grunting slightly at the force, then looked up as thor leaned down beside her. she giggled silently, hand going over her mouth, and nodded her head swiftly. "let's do it," she whispered back, then winked and moved to steve. "okay, let's spread out first. i'll start our guns with the panel on the wall. then we go. agreed?"

rey: HI BABE

steve: steve caught a glimpse of the two whispering out of the corner of his eye. he was too busy trying to scope out the area to realize what was going on. "okay." cap spoke as he zeroed in on the perfect spot. as soon as their guns were activated, the avenger was bolting up the stairs to the first hanger. the ramp was dark so soon enough he lost sight of the two. he kept his gun on the rail in true assassin fashion, ready to shoot at the friends.

steve: steve learned his moves from bucky ))

steve: wtF IS THAT THING

rey: thE EMOJI OMF

rey:

thor: tHE EMOJIS LMAO

steve: steve, finding out his friends are t8rs:

steve: tr8s***

rey: t8r tots

thor: "agreed." thor slid his finger over the trigger, readying himself. it didn't surprise him when steve was the first to take off as soon as rey gave the signal. considering his history as a soldier, thor had opted to take on an ally against him for that very reason. with one last nod at rey, he began navigating his way after steve as quietly as a man of his build could manage. it was much too dark, however, and thor soon found himself using one of the several odd glowing pillars for cover as his gaze scanned the area for signs of movement.

thor: T8R TOTS

thor: delish

rey "okay, ready? go!" rey shouted to them once they were all dispersed, using the force to start up the panel that gave their guns power. she began running along, mainly for cover at first, and ducked expertly behind walls using her stealthy silence. soon, she saw steve on the second floor and grinned to herself, running up the back stairs. she stayed ducked behind a wall, but stuck her gun out just enough to zero in on her target, and shoot rapidly at him, the sound effects going off.

rey: LOL

thor: GET HIM REY GET HIM

rey: if ben and rey ever played laser tag, shed get v emotional bc she tried to go after him with a gun on takodana rip

thor: sudden feels

steve: steve caught a glimpse of someone shuffling behind a pillar below. his finger snuck down to the trigger, slowly but surely ready to shoot the target. alas, his grand moment was ruined when laser beams sounded off behind him. he expected thor to be the one behind the shots, but he was faced with rey crouching behind a wall below. "rey, you traitor!" the super soldier exclaimed, surprisingly offended by her actions. he took off down the stairs determined to take her down.

rey: feel trip

steve: pft ben wouldn't go into the laser tag room, the darkness is too ~tempting~

rey: 'Does Rey call you Daddy ' riP

rey: the darkness works with his aesthetic tho

steve: wtF

rey: YEP U GOT US SHE SO DOES

steve: i don gettit

thor: the commotion from nearby, quickly followed by steve's shout, brought a grin to thor's face. remaining in place, he cocked his head and listened closely for the careless series of telltale stomps down the stairs as steve searched for his victim. alas, thor fully intended to protect his ally. as soon as he heard the other man moving passed his pillar, thor lunged out from behind it, sound effects deafening the quiet as he unloaded a series of shots directly at steve. "hide, rey!"

thor: oMG i saw that ask & i screamed

rey rey couldn't stop laughing as she ran as fast as she could away from steve, tripping over her own feet every now and then, though she allowed herself a break as she heard thor's gun go off, meaning he found steve. now was her chance. she ran up the stairs steve had been on earlier and crouched behind a wall again, then fired her gun... at thor. she fired shot after shot, right when he least expected it, then turned her gun on steve as well, continuing to laugh as she nailed them both. "sorry, i had to trick ya!"

steve: the confusion on his face was absolutely priceless as rey shot at them both. he was unbelievably aggrieved that the two had teamed up against him, but then this? steve didn't spare the laughing girl a look before lifting his laser and shooting it at her. "number one rule of war, skywalker: never get distracted on the battlefield."

steve

http://youtube.com/watch?v=-i99TPwXSoM

steve rn

rey: HAHAHAHAHAH

rey: OMFG

thor: his own ally had turned on him. when steve turned his own weapon on her in return, thor used it as cover, swiftly moving to circle around rey. it would have been a prime opportunity to shoot her again, but she deserved far worse than that. throwing an arm around her waist, he lifted her off her feet and draped her over his shoulder. "no more fun," he announced in a cheerful tone as he casually made his way back to the captain. "rogers, how do you punish traitors on this planet?"

rey "hey!" rey gasped as steve shot her, moving to run away again, then shrieked and laughed hard as thor picked her up and laid her across his shoulder, kicking her feet playfully. her gun slipped out of her hands in the midst of all the fighting, and she was laughing even harder as they approached steve, crossing her arms stubbornly. "not fair!"

rey: i shouldve had her say 'spank me, daddy'

steve: NO

thor: oMF G

rey: o ya

thor joined the chat 20 hours ago

thor: http://images.idakoos.com/B0220000BL0000...

rey: oh my og od

steve: "well, it usually goes something like.." steve pretended to stroke his chin in thought, before deciding on a torture method. "tickling. lots of it. it worked on the nazis every time." the captain joked lightly, letting his gun clatter to the floor beside him. "tickling on a trampoline seems pretty brutal to me."

steve: pcE

steve: https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/236...

rey: nO RAI IS SO TICKLISH SHE WILL START CRYING

rey: stop

rey: SOTP*

steve: can u imagine derek walking in one two burly blonde dudes tickling tf out of his gf

rey: ON A TRAMPOLINE

steve: can u imagine thor and cap on a trampoline like girl

rey: yum

rey: ive gotta go yeet to the shower after i do this next reply

thor: "tickling it is." tossing his weapon onto the floor as well, thor then turned on his heel and began making his way for wherever the 'trampolines' were. eventually, he managed to find them – and stepped onto the closest one without even hesitating. instantly the unstable, bouncy terrain threw him off-balance, and his grasp on rey loosened as he fell onto his back. as soon as his head stopped spinning, he spoke dryly, "/this/ is supposed to be fun?"

thor: prepare 4 me 2 randomly pass out again as soon as u shower xoxo

rey: omg ill try 2 hurry rip

rey "no, no, no!" rey protested and shook her head swiftly, knowing how ticklish she was, and laughed again as thor carried her to the trampolines, though she gasped as well as he fell, allowing her to break free from his hold. "yeah, it's so much fun! look!" she giggled and began jumping up and down, reaching her hands out to steve.

thor: if u guys would just move to the superior east coast this wouldn't be a probLEM

rey: OK BRB

steve: ive never been to the east coast i am down

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rey: I AM BACK

rey: WAS THAT FAST ENOUGH

rey: OR NO

rey: WHERE DID U ALL GO

rey: WHAT

steve joined the chat 19 hours ago

steve: im heeree

rey: friEND

rey: I LEFT FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES DID THIS PLACE DIE OR SMTH

steve: steve's left angle gave out beneath him on the canvas of the trampoline. he stumbled a bit before finding his footing. as soon as rey approached him, he reached his hands out to attack her ribs. he began to tickle her, seizing her jumping movements

steve: idK YOU LEFT AND THEN KAYLA LEFT SO I WAS LIKE OK PCE

rey: i tolD U WEHRE I WAS GO ING

steve: MAYBE SHE FELL ASLEEP IDK

rey: GDI

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thor: I FELL ASLEEP AGAIN IM S ORRY

rey: LAAAAME

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rey: ayyyy

thor: ayyy hello ur fav sleepaholic is here

rey: LOL

thor: upon carefully finding his footing (which proved immensely more difficult when rey was bouncing all over the place) thor stepped over to join the pair engaged in a one-sided tickle fight. bending his knees a couple of times in a test bounce, he glanced down at rey with undeniable smugness. "i would help you, but this is your rightful fate after betraying me." and if asgardians were good at anything, it was holding grudges.

thor: i love how we're all rarely on at the same time lmao

rey: thats so tru

thor: REY MEETING LOKI THO

rey "no!" rey shrieked as steve began tickling her, causing her to completely lose her footing. his hands were the only things holding her up now, and she was laughing so hard it was almost silent. and thor wasn't helping. time to pull the guilt card. "ow, steve. /ow/," she winced, hand going to her ribs, where he had bruised her from hugging her too hard. "it hurts, stop..."

rey: rey u bitch

rey: I K NOW

rey: WE PLOTTED SOME THINGS MWAHAHAH

thor: YOU WHAT OMG IM AFRAID

rey: BE AFRAID

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steve: WAS GOOD

steve: steve withdrawled his hands with a mortified look on his face. how could he forget? that bruise was bound to be there, and worse than it was before. "i'm so sorry," the avenger gushed. his apology was a little humorous due to the way he swayed back and forth on the trampoline.

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thor: hOW DO WE ALWAYS MISS EACH OTHER WTF

thor: thor's earlier amusement quickly turned into a whirlwind of confusion and concern. while steve withdrew, the asgardian lowered himself to a crouch beside rey, his hand tentatively enveloping her shoulder. "what happened?" his eyes scanned the girl for injuries before snapping to his fellow avenger accusingly. "did his tickles harm you?"

steve: im here

thor: SUP

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rey: riP

thor joined the chat 13 minutes ago

rey: IM SRY

rey rey bit the inside of her cheek to keep from laughing. the bruise was already almost gone, and she wasn't hurt at all. she just liked to mess with her boys. as thor asked his question, the smile finally spread across her cheeks as she shook her head, easily rising to her feet and bouncing up and down a bit. "actually, i'm feeling a lot better," she giggled and winked before bouncing away as she laughed even harder, knowing they'd want to get their revenge. "gotcha!"

thor: thor picked himself up off the ground, reaching up and patting the back of his head in the process. the bun still held. huh. it really did hold better thanks to rey's superior method. "if anyone attempts to arrest us, i'll stop them," he replied with confidence. narrowing his eyes in rey's direction, he added, "besides, i don't wish to ever come back here again. it will only remind me of betrayal."

rey at the mention of getting arrested again, rey's smile immediately disappeared as she stopped her bouncing, fidgeting with her fingers nervously. she felt slightly more relieved at thor's promise of keeping them out of jail, nodding her head. then she moved to thor and couldn't help but wrap her arms around him, still overall grateful that he would even think about stopping people from arresting them. she couldn't do that again. "thank you..." she whispered, then reached a hand out to steve.

steve: "don't worry about getting arrested." the captain shot a smile to rey. "rey has the force. she can get us out of everything." he spoke highly of the girl, grasping her palm in his.

thor: though thor was supposed to be annoyed with her, he couldn't help but soften as her small arms wrapped around him. he enveloped her in one of his own in return, rubbing one of her shoulders. "the force?" he repeated, brows furrowing. "she is tiny. what force could she have?"

rey "...if snoke doesn't get in my way..." rey replied quietly in a pessimistic manner, glancing shyly up at steve. then she clasped onto his hand before looking up at thor, smiling softly. "the force surrounds us all. it controls... basically everything. watch," she whispered then turned to the ball pit, lifting her free hand up. but nothing was happening. "...no," she breathed out, shaking her head as she tried again and again to at least make one of the small, colored balls levitate. "no, no, no..." she could feel its absence in her mind, in her heart. with snoke so strong now, it was hard to keep in touch with it. "steve, i-i can't- it's gone..."

steve: snoke. he had heard that name before.. it was the sith lord who invaded rey's brain. the captain moved closer to her, bending down slightly to get a better look at her. "are you alright?" he pressed. at times like this, he wished wanda was here to help.

thor: if the force surrounded them all, thor had no idea how he'd never sensed it before. he watched, captivated, as rey seemed to be attempting to do something –– but failed. "what's gone? the force?" thor looked back and forth between steve and rey, faintly irritated over his lack of understanding. instinctively, his arm tightened around her shoulders, pulling her in closer. "we will help you find it."

rey rey looked into steve's eyes nervously as he ducked his head down to look at her, much like derek did when she was upset about something. "it-it doesn't hurt yet, but i can't... i can't focus on doing it," she whispered, wrapping her arms around thor again as he hugged her. then she nodded her head and stepped back as she took a deep breath, thinking about the hope that both steve and her new friend, thor, had for her. she closed her eyes and held her hand up again, focusing as hard as she could. when she opened her eyes, only one ball had popped out of the pit, and rolled a few inches on the ground, then stopped. she sighed heavily and buried her face in her hands, hoping she wasn't losing touch with the force for good.

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ur favorite grandpa joined the chat 2 days ago

ur favorite grandpa changed name to thor

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steve: steve smiled gently as the ball rolled forward. he knew it must have took a lot to persevere with snoke inside of her mind. "don't get upset." the avenger chastised the girl. "you just need to.. find the force again. is there anyone who can help you?" he knew that rey had multiple family members in magnolia. they had to be able to help her, someway or somehow. "could we help you?"

thor: a ball levitated in midair, seemingly doing so as a result of rey's concentration. thor barely heard steve as the man spoke, too busy gaping at the ball in newfound fascination. an amazed laugh escaped him. "did you move that with your mind?" he turned to face rey, eyes dancing with enthusiasm over what he had just witnessed. "is this the force? i did not realize you were capable of something so incredible." after a pause in which the solemn mood washed over him, he added, "if you could do that, then the force is still within you. you haven't lost it."

rey rey turned sheepishly towards the two again, nodding her head to steve. but then, noting thor's reaction, her own expression lightened slightly, her shoulders straightening. "r-really...?" she whispered, feeling more reassured by the way he was so interested in her force skills. "as-as long as snoke's here, i don't think i can get any better..." she mumbled to steve and stepped back. in fact, she could feel him coming now. she opened her mouth to explain it to them, but just turned and moved off the trampolines onto the floor, rubbing her temples with her fingers.

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steve: "don't say that." steve called after rey as jumped off the trampoline. he looked at thor before following after her. surely this snoke guy could be stopped. they've dealt with aliens before, what made this one so different? "what can we do to help?"

steve joined the chat 43 hours ago

thor: the mention of snoke nearly drew a low growl from thor's throat. the idea of an unseen opponent harming someone like rey right beside him while he was powerless to do anything to stop it was beyond upsetting, to say the least. "there must be a way to track him," thor added as he trailed after steve, worried gaze on rey's back. "if i know where he is, i can put a stop to this. even if he has armies, they will not stop me."

rey rey buried her face in her hands now and sniffed, trying to push him out of her mind as much as possible. but it wasn't necessarily simple. at the first small pain, she winced and jumped slightly, hands dropping to her mouth. "no, no, no, no..." she murmured under her breath as she began to tremble, pleading for him to leave her mind. then there was another, sharper pain and rey tucked her knees to her chest, beginning to rock back and forth.

steve: steve dove to his knees as soon as rey fell. "hey, hey," he cooed, wrapping his arms around his shoulders. he knew whatever she was feeling or seeing was much like what they went through when wanda brainwashed them. if not worse. he felt a intense need to protect his best friend. "it's gonna be okay, rey. i love you. stay with us," he cooed, rubbing her back as his heart hammered in his chest.

thor: it appeared steve and rey were even closer than thor originally suspected. the revelation did little to ease the tension in his muscles as he began circling restlessly around the pair, hands curling into fists as he itched to summon his prized weapon and smash something, anything. "we must help her," he finally said, stopping to glare at steve. "there must be a way. think of something."

rey rey clasped her hands over her ears and began to cry as she buried her face in his chest, but managed to murmur, "i-i love y-you too..." through her sobs. just so he knew how appreciative she really was of his kind, caring heart. her hands moved about until they landed on thor's chest, curling her fingers into his shirt and holding it tightly, tugging him closer. another sharp pain caused her to shriek and weep even harder, tears flowing freely down her cheeks.

steve: "you're the one from space." steve gritted his teeth, trying to focus on the girl falling apart before him. she was in excruciating pain by the looks of it, and it killed him not being able to stop it. "rey, listen to me. is there anything we can do? what makes it hurt less?" the usual put together soldier was now stumbling over his words in an attempt to help his friend.

thor: thor allowed himself to be pulled closer, teeth grinding together as he fought to keep his rage against an invisible foe in check. his temper wouldn't help, especially not when the likes of even steve rogers was losing his cool. "i could take her to asgard," he said slowly. "our healers may lessen her pain while we search for answers." assuming everyone on asgard cooperated and sought to help her as much as he did.

rey "d-derek..." was the first thing rey choked out. he usually helped her after a snoke episode. by... doing exactly what steve and thor were doing now. holding her. talking to her. maybe things would be okay. she squeezed her eyes shut and tried to focus on clearing her mind, like anakin and ben taught her, attempting to push out all thoughts of anything dark. instead she focused on memories of derek. of ben, of steve, of thor, everyone. and slowly, gradually, she calmed down, eyes finally fluttering open. he was leaving. he was smart enough to pick his battles, rey was sure, and probably couldn't fight this one.

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steve: steve's jaw clenched at the mention of derek, but he quickly shook his rage off to focus on rey. her body noticeably let up moments later. he retracted his arms once he knew she was alright. "how often does this happen?"

thor: the unfamiliar name made thor frown, glancing at steve for answers – only to find an odd expression awaiting on the man's face for a split second. dislike? mentally tucking it away, he refocused on rey. where steve moved back, the asgardian leaned forward, slipping his arms beneath rey and lifting her effortlessly into his arms. steve already asked the question on his mind, so he remained quiet, merely looking down at her with expectance.

rey rey's arms slid easily around thor's neck, noticing how he didn't even flinch when lifting her small body. she really was curious to know how strong they both were. "it's-it's been happening more often than not lately..." she admitted in a whisper, rubbing at her eyes with her fists then returning her arms around thor's neck as she looked into steve's eyes. "i-i'm okay, though... please don't tell derek, i don't want him to worry. please."

steve: "do you know how to get to this snoke person?" his tone was firm and assertive, much like the one he reserved for the avengers. he ignored her question about derek and continued with the questions. "can your family help you at all?"

thor: there was that name again. derek. thor's eyes narrowed in annoyance over not knowing yet another piece of information in the rapidly developing mystery of rey. at least the captain was back in action, a small silver lining. "if she knew where snoke was or if her family could help, i'd wager she would have already said as much by now." looking back and forth between the pair, he added, "who is this 'derek'?"

rey "/no/," rey snapped in frustration, mostly at herself for not being able to rid of the sith lord. "just-just forget it, he's gone now..." she mumbled, then closed her eyes again at the mention of derek. now she really missed him. she took a few deep breaths to keep the tears from filling her eyes, then rose to her feet shakily, one hand still in thor's, and the other in steve's. "i-i don't wanna dwell on snoke anymore... not tonight... please? i need a break...'

steve: "her boyfriend." steve answered curtly as rey let out her frustration. he couldn't understand how she could try to move on from something like that. his grip on her palm was loose. "what do you want to do?" he looked around, mentally checking off everything they had done. ball pit, check. playground, check. laser tag, check. trampoline, check. "i saw a game room near the front?"

thor: for a long moment, thor didn't move, only staring hard at the captain. if derek was rey's lover, why was steve so visibly displeased by the very mention of him? thor had only ever seen one reason for that type of behavior. as a fresh understanding dawned, thor wordlessly tightened his grasp of rey's hand and began leading her in the direction of the game room. when they arrived, he stepped passed several brightly colored loud machines until one in particular caught his eye. "captain america and the avengers?" he read aloud, amused in spite of himself.

rey "yeah, can we do that?" rey whispered as she took out her pigtails, trying to let the smile appear on her face again, though it was still shaky for now. she let go of steve's hand, knowing the reason behind his sudden closure, and instead held thor's with both of her own, stumbling along behind him. "whoa..." she whispered in amazement at all the machines, her eyes widening. once at the machine thor stopped it, she began giggling and moved to sit down on the floor in front of the game, knowing from experience to not be on her feet for too long after a snoke episode.

steve: "sounds about right." steve laughed under his breath, leaning against the side of the arcade game. he stared at the giant, cartoon version of himself for a few beats before moving around again. he wandered off toward a skeeball machine where he grabbed one of the basketballs. the avenger stood there, absentmindedly dribbling the basketball. the first time he shot, it went in effortlessly even though he hardly paying attention.

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thor: thor watched rey settle down onto the ground before glancing once more at the machine. uninterested in trying (and likely failing) to figure out how to toy with it, he shifted his attention to steve and the ease with which he tossed a ball through a hoop. "how long have you known each other?" he finally asked, looking back and forth between them. he could have asked more about derek, but keeping the peace felt like a better idea right then.

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rey: \

rey rey watched steve as he moved to go shoot a basketball, still staying where she hd sat on the ground. then she glanced up at thor and shrugged a shoulder. "i-i don't know... a month or so...? maybe longer?" she asked steve, smiling shyly to herself and resting her chin on her knees. "i used to have the biggest crush on him."

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steve: steve nearly choked on his tongue at rey's confession. instead of replying, he merely shot the basketball into the 100 point section. "you might not want to tell derek that." the soldier muttered as he collected the tickets that spewed out of the machine. he handed them over to rey, seeing that he had no use for them. "go get a prize."

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thor: "yes, go get your prize," thor agreed, pushing at rey with gentle but insistent nudges toward the area with several objects scattered along the wall that he assumed were prizes. as soon as she was out of earshot, he turned to steve, arms folding over his broad chest. "where i come from, we settle these situations with duels. have you considered fighting derek for her heart?" he kept his voice low, lips curving to betray his amusement. then, just like that, his features turned solemn. "if not, you must let go of her, friend. this pining is not easy to watch."

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rey rey looked up hesitantly as steve handed her the tickets, collecting them all into her arms and rising to her feet slowly. she didn't move immediately, but at thor's gentle persistence, she finally made her way to the counter, oblivious as to why they sent her away. she was too excited about her prizes. the worker there, the only one left, seemed less than thrilled about accepting the tickets, and told her to pick out three things. she looked over her shoulder at steve and thor, seeing them still talking, then glanced at the shelves to pick her prizes.

steve: steve scowled at thor's proposal. he wasn't entirely subtle about his dislike for derek, but he didn't think it was that obvious. "i'm not fighting derek." his gaze followed rey, who was eagerly awaiting her prizes. "i'll get over it. i always do." he shook his head, eyes falling down to his fidgeting fingers. it was a total lie. he wasn't even over peggy yet — and that was seventy years ago. he couldn't even close his eyes at night without thinking of her or bucky.

thor joined the chat 5 hours ago

thor: "no, you will not." thor knew an overly-attached lovestruck fool when he saw one. he himself had been on the opposite end of that sort of infatuation more than once, in fact. "these things do not simply fade away. they grow stronger, along with resentment, until you find yourself saying something you will regret." throwing rey a glance, he then dropped a hand on steve's shoulder, squeezing more tightly than truly necessary. "do not destroy your friendship with her. take some time away, if you must –– but let go of this before it harms both of you." thor released him and, without awaiting a response, strode over to join rey.

rey "thank you," rey gasped as the worker handed her her three items, hugging them close to her chest. then she turned towards her friends as thor made his way over to her, showing them the three bears she'd picked out. ( http://www.buildabear.com/ProductImages/... , http://www.buildabear.com/public/images/... , http://www.buildabear.com/ProductImages/... ) "aren't they so cute?" she giggled then moved to steve, wrapping her arms around him the best she could with her new toys. "thank you so much, steve."

steve: the crease between steve's brows tightened following his words. he knew thor was right, but the thought of distancing himself from the girl brought a sharp pain to his chest. he knew he would have to get over his schoolboy crush or else it'd cause damage. the soldier managed to muster a smile at rey as she approached. the stuffed animals tucked under her arm were cute, indeed. the cap and thor bears coaxed a laugh out of him. there was another one that strangely resembled darth vader. "you're welcome." his voice was distant, but the smile gracing his lips still remained. "where to now?"

thor joined the chat 2 hours ago

thor: thor cast a disapproving eye at rey as she embraced steve, but resigned himself to trusting that the captain would take his advice and move on. if not, thor would do his best to help pick up the pieces when things made a turn for the worse. "is this supposed to be me?" he took hold of his lookalike bear's paw, feeling the soft plushness of it. "hm. we should get ice cream." his eyes met rey's with a wink. in his experience, mortals loved their ice cream.

steve joined the chat 113 minutes ago

thor joined the chat 92 minutes ago

rey rey grinned softly at steve's laugh, wishing he would do so more often, then looked between him and thor. "of course it is," she giggled, holding up the thor-themed teddy bear she'd chosen. then she gasped before nodding swiftly. "yes, yes, yes!" she begged, and didn't even wait for an answer before moving to the exit, but not before scooping up her captain america figurine that steve gave her, and holding it with her three teddy bears. "c'mon, you two are so slow!"

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