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#Ohio is too far away
midniterose · 1 year
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Be me
Delusionally hope one of your beloved moots is a secret millionaire
Make it known that what you want for your birthday is travel, accommodations, and ringside tickets to the AEW show in Columbus on August 9th (two days after your birthday)
???
Hopefully get to wear your HangMox shirt on TV to a show Mox is almost guaranteed to be at
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cozy-in-my-head-my-bed · 11 months
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i got a camera!!
#the bin#from my dad. i dont like seeing him i hate him but free camera#apparently its a $1000 camera but he got it for free i assume. he gets a lot of stuff oike tnis for free#i KNOW he didnt pay that for it. well doenst matter. free camera. im excited to take pictures with it and learn how to use it#i dont like loving where i live rigjt now (Minnesota) but i wanna take some pictures before i move away#i miss ohio. i think it was prettier but thats just my preference. Minnesota is ok. the loon is my favorite bird and has been since before i#moved here. i didnt know it was the state bird until afyer i lived here over a year. its a good bird. love it a lot#qnd the anow here is way sparklier than in ohio. its like someone is pouring glitter from the sky. its really beautiful#but thise r the only 2 good things abt it. the area i live in sucks. ive heard other areas are nice and the people are nicer#its too cold for me though. last winter was rough and im not looking forward to this year any more. well. it is what it is#i will try to take pictures while im here. ive always been interested in photography but cameras r so expensive n my phone camera is#awful so i havent got into it. now i have a camera so i have no excuse. maybe i will post some of my pictures#but i dont wanna show what area of Minnesota i love in so i probably will not unless im far enough away from the area i live in#its actually way easy to figure out exactly where a pocture was taken with even some nondescript buildings around so#but i wanna go farther away anyway so when i do that ill try to take some pictures
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allaboutnayeli · 5 months
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fresh out of the salon [k.martin x reader]
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prompt: kate gets her hair done after the season ends and you're in love with it
author notes: let me firstly disclaim that i don't know shit about hair outside of black ppl hair 💔 and i hardly know that. secondly, i don't know if kate is a natural blonde with dark roots or a brunette who dyes her hair blonde but im pretty sure she's a natural blonde so.. if she isn't just ignore all the times i call her that. thirdly im still getting kate's personality 🙇🏽‍♀️ so this might not be super accurate to her but whatever. anyways enough yapping, enjoy it.
word of the fic: hair
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it was only a few days after iowa's defeat against south carolina. kate was quick to call you when she reached her hotel room; feeling drained from the intense atmosphere during the game and also heartbroken she left her basketball college career off with a loss. you unfortunately couldn't make it due to having to focus on softball season. if iowa had played a home game for the final, you could had comforted your girlfriend afterwards but sadly she was still in ohio; having to do a few promotional shoots for a brand.
having to stay away from you longer than nesscary annoyed the blonde, but money is money so she sucked it up. you two relied on facetime and constant talking to stay connected. your teammates teased you all the time about how you been glued to your phone everytime there was a break at practice, but could they blame you? it's kate we're talking about here.
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it's around ten pm when the blonde finally facetimes you. her face being close to the camera once the call connected.
"why am i seeing more of your nose than you, kate?" you giggle. getting comfortable on your bed before putting your attention fully on her. kate makes an obvious pout that you can see very closely with her face almost squished against her phone.
"i want a kiss," the iowa basketball player pulls her face away, not too far, to give you a full look of her lips. you roll your eyes, but internally the cuteness levels going on right now from her were huge. you indulge her before counting down so she was ready to kiss the phone screen the moment you were.
she lays back onto the hotel bed pillows afterwards. a satisfied look on her face; kate was truly the only one who can make you do something as embarrassing as kissing a phone screen. you take in her full appearance now. the blonde had obviously slip on some pajamas after coming to her hotel room from the shoot. a matching hello kitty matching pajama set that you recognized as yours is on her body.
"who said you could take my clothes?" you make a fake angry expression that just makes kate shake her head in amusement. "i did and i'm your girlfriend, so deal with it," kate says.
you roll your eyes before noticing a slight difference with kate. her hair looks slightly different than how it was when she left iowa. the darkish blonde of the player now has nicely done highlights on them. when did kate get her hair done? and why didn't she tell you?
the silence from your side of the line makes kate pout, "talk to me, baby. i missed your voice all day."
a flutter goes through your chest at her words; kate always knew what to say to have you swooning. "you got your hair done!" you say. she giggles, looking away from the screen in shyness. the player wasn't used to someone noticing things about her appearance. it was a new feeling of appreciation that makes kate crave to be near you even more.
"yeah. since i was doing those photoshoots, i thought it would be best to give my hair some new life," kate leaves out the part about how the loss to south carolina made her cry and immediately want to go to the salon to feel new again the moment she left the stadium (in the end only getting her hair done earlier today), but that's a topic for later. two things could be true at once though.
"but no selfies?" it was now your turn to pout. feeling slightly sad that your girlfriend didn't send a selfie your way after the first step she took out of the salon. kate wants to kiss away your pout so badly, but can't; curse nil deals.
"i was going to, baby. don't pout at me, it just makes me miss you even more. i had a photoshoot right after the salon and couldn't really text," kate explains. the pout on your lips disappears with you back to missing her.
"it looks so good on you, babes. makes me wanna kiss you"
"then gimme a kiss. the screen doesn't matter to me," kate puckers her lips up. leaning back close to the screen as you do the same.
you two stay up until twelve. during the rest of the call you keep taking facetime photos of kate because for one, she was just so adorable and for two, her new hair was doing things for you. the highlights really brought out her eyes. you were definitely going to kiss her all over her face when she landed back in iowa.
you tell kate to go off to sleep when the clock strikes one, so she can be well rested for her flight back home tomorrow. she pouts until you agree to fall asleep on the phone; who would say no to that face?
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© thinkingaboutjaedyn
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bengals-barnesbabe · 24 days
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There’s Something You Should Know
Pair: Dad!Joe Burrow x OC , Dad!Joe Burrow x ExFianćee!Reader
Desc: Joe’s new girlfriend is in for a big surprise when she drops by unexpectedly.
TW: Jealousy, Toxic Gf, talks of divorce, childhood trauma
a/n: just a little idea I had and worked on for 2 weeks :)
Main Masterlist
WC: 4.9k
┊┊┊┊ ➶ 𓆉。˚ ✧
August weekends are some of Joe’s favorites, not because he goes out with friends or showers his girlfriend with the attention she desires. No, he loves days like this. Days where his living room doesn’t stay clean for more than a few hours, mornings filled with cute giggles and sticky-syrupy little fingers, and nights controlled by a little girl with beautiful hazel brown eyes and a head full of dark tight curls, who picks the same bedtime story every night. These are his favorite moments.
Like now as he picks up the pink and purple lego sets off his living room floor while his little girl is off playing with some other toys in her playroom. From down the hall, he can hear all the make-believe scenarios the stuffies are going through. Currently, Who Dey the tiger and Joey the kangaroo were shopping for skirts but there was only one pink sparkly one left, it was a heavy debacle that Joe couldn't help but chuckle at while putting away the rest of the legos. 
Elliana, or Ellie for short, is the no doubt most important person (albeit little person) in his life. From the day she was born, there was nothing he wouldn’t do for his little girl. Now at 4 years old, the bubbly and charismatic girl is taking in some of his interests, hence the immense collection of Lego sets that decorate his home. Sure this hobby came back to bite him in the rear when he would fall to victim of said legos by stepping on them, but the time they spent together just playing around was worth all the lego injuries in the world. But they also have house slippers now, to protect both of their feet.
Joe moved to tidy up the kitchen after double checking that all legos were in their rightful spots, not that he was actually going to count every single lego. To prepare for his 4 day weekend with Ellie, he made sure to restock on all her favorite meals and snacks but also ingredients to make the Bengals-themed cookies that she hadn’t stop talking about since she saw them on a commercial for a grocery store they don’t even have in Ohio. Joe wasn’t much of a baker, he only began cooking real meals when Ellie started staying over for multiple nights. Give him a box of Kraft Mac N Cheese and some dino nuggets and he’d turn it gourmet for his daughter, but for now that’s as far as he could go. So he called in reinforcements for this mission.
*ding dong*
His saving grace, Ja’Marr Chase. Joe was forever grateful to have a best friend that loved and cared for his daughter like she was his own. Ja’Marr was a great uncle and Ellie thought so too.
“Daddy, daddy! It’s Uncle Marr, he’s here to make cookies!” He smiles as the squeaky voiced girl comes running down the hall. Before she passes the kitchen, he sneakily pulls her into his arms before she could notice him. “Daddy!”
“What did I say about running in the house? I know you’re excited but you might fall and hurt yourself and that would make daddy really sad.” He lightly scolds bending down to her height.
“I’m sorry daddy. No more running.” Ellie cutely nods and places her small hands on his cheeks to lift his faux frown.  A grin quickly returns to his face and he kisses her forehead. 
“That’s my good girl, how about you go wash your hands so you and Uncle Marr can get started?” Her face beams as she wraps her arms around his neck. He returns the hug almost as tightly to take in the warm sense of comfort that having her in his arms brings. His arms could probably wrap around the young girl twice, but the contentment of having her little ones squeezing onto him so tightly is a feelings he never wants to forget. When she finally lets go, she kisses his cheek then skips down the hall in her fluffy pink slippers.
The door bell ringing again brings Joe back to his full height, but his brows furrow when he doesn’t hear his friend do his usual call out. ‘He’s probably on the phone.’ He thinks walking over to front door. He opens the door wide with a smile to greet one of his best friends, but gets replaced with his eyes widening and mouth dropping in shock.
“Hi babe!” 
Joe blinks then narrows the door’s opening to only fit half his body. “What are you doing here?” He asks the woman he’s been seeing for 6 months.
“I thought we could spend some time together. I know you said you’d be busy this weekend, but you’re busy every weekend. But since you’re actually home, we could watch a movie or something.” She smiles trying to peak inside. “Are you going to invite me in?”
Joe can hear the faucet in the first floor bathroom turn off and another car pull into his driveway. He looks behind him and zeroes in on every detail in his house that screams ‘this is my little princess’ castle’ then turns back to his curious girlfriend. “Um, now’s not a great time Kate.”
The short brunette’s jaw clenches and just as she’s about to respond, Ja’Marr walks up behind her. “Wow- so what, Saturdays are for the boys?” She barks. Actually they’re for the girls, little girls.
“Kate-
Loud giggles erupt from behind him. “UNCLE MARR! Daddy he’s right there I see him!” 
His teammate breaks out in a smile and waves to Ellie. “Hey babygirl.” Ja’Marr excuses himself from behind the woman and Joe lets him in the house.
Kate stands in front of him now dumbfounded. “You have a daughter?”
When Joe met Katelyn, he hadn’t had a long term girlfriend in a while, not since you. So he didn’t have to introduce anyone to his daughter. His team already knew her, his friends were great with her and she had a mom and dad who would do anything for her. Joe didn’t even feel like dating after your engagement ended two years ago. He had some hookups here and there, but getting into a relationship was not on his mind. Funnily that’s how this ‘relationship’ started, she was just someone he could call and was cool about it. Then he took her out to dinner to test the waters and half a year later he’s here.
When you broke up, you and Joe agreed not introduce your daughter to anybody without the other’s consent. You both wanted to make sure that she was your priority and her safety always came first. Then Joe implemented the rule to not introduce Elliana to romantic interests until at least 9 months into the relationship, he said it was him being protective but it was also so he didn’t have to see you without anyone else until it was serious. You also didn’t broadcast your daughter to the world like other parents, so not many knew that he did have a daughter unless they watched his every move. 
So long story short, Katelyn did not know.
“We should talk.” He said as she shoved his body to the side and stomped into his home. “I guess I deserve that.” He shook his head and shut the door.
Thankfully, the kitchen and the living room were a decent distance from each other so when she plopped down on the farthest end of the sofa, he could relax knowing Ellie wouldn’t hear any distinct words the woman might start throwing his way. Kate sat facing the blank tv screen, he took the spot in front of her so he could still see some of the movements in the kitchen through a wall cut out.
“Listen Kate.”
“No me first.” She cuts him off with a hand in front of his face. He just nods and allows her to speak. “Why didn’t you tell me? Is she actually yours? Where’s her mother? How come no one knows about her? Why didn’t you fucking tell me? I thought I was your girlfriend, do I mean nothing to you? Who keeps this kind of giant fucking secret? Fucking talk!” She huffs.
“I was letting you go off- whatever. Yes, Elliana is mine. She just looks exactly like her mother” He mumbles the last part, combing his fingers through his hair, a nervous tick he’s had since he was little.
“She’s 4 and I have dual custody over her, so I mostly get her during the weekends. I didn’t tell you because her mother and I have an arrangement and I would have to talk to her about it first. Her mom lives here- well not here here, she lives in the city. You know I don’t like the attention the spotlight gives so it was easy for us to decide to leave her out of it as much as possible. I guess was going to tell you at some point.”
“What do you mean, you guess? I’m your girlfriend! Don’t you think I have the right to know that the guy I’m seeing has a kid?” She crosses her arms red faced.
“Calm down, we haven’t been seeing each other that long. We were never that serious.” 
“Of course not, every time I want to spend time with you there’s a new excuse. Oh you have a game, or practice that evidently takes all fucking day. Maybe you’re hiding me because there’s someone else.”
“I promise the only other girl in my life right now is my daughter. And everything you just said is a valid excuse, I have a job and child that require all my attention.”
“Why can’t she just stay with her mother? Do you have this stupid arrangement so she can come by and give you what you’ve been missing? I bet you’ve been fucking her this whole time.”
Joe scoffs, her words starting to make his blood boil. “Katelyn, what do you not understand about us co-parenting our daughter? I barely have time to spend with you, so what makes you think I have time to cheat? If you have a problem with me being a father, then you should leave.”
“I don’t have a problem with you being a dad, I have a problem with you not talking about your ex. What, was she so special that it hurts to talk about her? Was she the one, Joe? What exactly is your relationship like with her now?”
“I told you, we co parent. There’s nothing going on with me and her mother, that’s all in the past. Can we stop talking about her now, she’s not going to just pop up out of nowhere?” He rolls his eyes. 
“I’m not convinced, you’d only hide her if there was still something between you.” 
“Yea her name is Elliana, the four year old making cookies in my kitchen right now.”
Before Katelyn can come back with another complaint, the doorbell rings, again. Joe sighs and looks out the window to see another very familiar car. Spoke too soon Joe.
He opens the door to see another one of his close teammates and the very woman he was just talking about. 
“Tee, Y/n what are you doing here?” His eyes lazily flicker between the pair and you send him a sheepish smile.
“Oh you know, we were just in the neighborhood.” Tee nods very nonchalantly. You nudge his side with a chuckle.
“I got a 911 call from Ellie, she said there was an emergency.” 
“Really?” He starts to pat down his pockets and realizes his phone is missing. He turns around and spots a smiling little girl with two long braids neatly done with purple bows in her hair. “Ellie…”
“Yes daddy.”
“Did you call mommy with my phone without telling me?” 
“Yep!”
You stop the laugh from bursting out your mouth when he sends you a pointed look. Taking that as a sign to go ‘confront’ your daughter. “Elliana why did you call me saying there was an emergency?
“There is an emergency momma! Uncle Jay is eating all the cookies!” Ja’Marr turns around shocked at his little partner. 
“Ellie, what did I tell you about snitches?”
“Snitches get stitches.” She relays matter factly. Joe shakes his head in confusion because clearly he wasn’t aware she knew about snitches yet. While you chuckle and run in to snatch up your girl.
“Ellie what did I tell you about taking advice from Uncle J?” You ask placing her on the counter.
“You said to tell you when he teaches me something new. He just did momma, see I told you!”
“Wow, Joe see what your friends have done to my sweet little girl.” She giggles wrapping her arms around your neck.
“They’re your friends too. How is it my fault, I had no idea?”
“There’s your answer.” You smirk. “Now Ms. Ellie Dae Burrow, is there any other emergency I need to know about?”
Freeing herself from your grasp she nods her head. “We don’t know how to ice cookies mommy.” Then takes your face in her hands and turns you towards the powdered sugar mess next to her baking buddy.
“Ellie, did you touch the cookies before touching mommy’s face?”
“Um yes?”
“Did you wash your hands after touching the cookies?” The young girl looks at her flour caked hands curiously. 
“No mommy.”
“Remember what I said about touching your toys with dirty hands?” Ellie nods her head. “Well that goes for people too, cause now I’m covered in flour.”
“Oh, sorry mommy. I’ll go wash my hands now.”
You go off to get washed up then Ellie returns to the kitchen to continue helping with the cookies while you join Joe in the living room.
“I hope you guys didn’t have anything planned, Ellie clearly has a mind of her own.” Joe jokes with the couple.
“Not much, we were just going to pick up some lunch and maybe catch a movie.” Tee shrugs.
“That’s what we were going to do, how funny.” Kate perks up with hidden mischief in her eyes. This is when you realize you have no clue where this woman came from nor who she is. 
“Joe?”
“Oh how rude of me. I’m Katelyn, Joe’s girlfriend and I assume you’re his baby mama.” She fake smiles holding her hand out.
The eyes of the men in the room widen at her bold choice of words. You smirk and shake the woman’s hand. “Yep, that’s me. The mother of his only child, you must know how great of a dad he is right? Whenever he has any time off, he’s always picking her up or coming over to see her. Truly father of the decade and she isn’t even 5 yet.”
Tee sits next the father hiding his face in his hands and chuckles. “I bet this isn’t how you wanted this to go.” He whispers to him. Joe just groans in his hands.
“Well, you should have a seat.” Kate invites.
“Oh I will, thank you for the hospitality in the house that my ex fiance asked me my opinion on over a year ago.” You grin and sit on the other side of Tee.
Katelyn’s kind demeanor shifts with a fake smile wide on her cheeks as she sits next to Joe. “So why’d you break up?”
“We are not starting here!” Joe’s eyes go wide and he straightens up. “Ask anything else please.”
“Joseph, your girlfriend wants to know why we’re not married right now. Why don’t you tell her?” You say forgetting how the whole thing happened for a bit. Thankfully those cherished memories come floating back to your mind and you hoped he decided to change the subject to cover your mishap.
“You just met, aren’t you supposed to be doing the making sure she’s safe for Ellie to be around thing?” You let out a muted sigh before replying.
“Oh please, and you haven’t?”
“No.” He mutters.
Your face hardens as you kiss your teth. “You let this woman around my daughter without screening her first? Joseph what the hell?”
He throws his hands up in surrender. “I didn’t think it was going to last this long, I wasn’t thinking about it.”
“Then why is she here?” You question turning your body completely towards him.
“Your guess is as good as mine!”
Katelyn scoffs, “excuse me, I’m sitting right here!”
“Unfortunately we see that too. How long have you been together anyway?” You hope that their explanation has to do with the restrictions you came up with to keep your daughter safe.
“7 mont-
“6 months- They say at the same time.
“Damn, this is awkward. I’m gonna go.” Tee announces. “I’ll text you.” Then he leaves.
“Looks like that didn’t last, maybe that’s why Joe left you. You attract drama everywhere you go.” Joe grimaces at her just wanting her to stop talking.
“Oh no hun, I left him. Not like it’s any of your damn business cause you don’t know me or him that well either. But let me guess, he told you he was busy but you showed up anyway hoping he’d let you in and give you whatever you want. I wouldn’t stress about him not making enough time for you, there’s a lot of worst ways he could be treating you. Just remember that at the end of the day, I’m that little girl’s mom and he’s her dad. I’ll always have a key in the door, when you won’t even get to see the open house.” Then you got up and went to the kitchen. Joe watched in amusement as Katelyn seethed. Then peaked behind him to catch a glimpse of you and your daughter baking together.
“You need to talk to her, she needs to know that I’m your future and she needs to make room.” Joe rolls his eyes.
“She’s right. They’re my past, present and my future. You were just a distraction and now I don’t need you anymore. I’m going to have to ask you need to leave my daughter’s house.” 
She shakes her head. “Joe, we can have our own family. You don’t need them. I can do that for you.”
“Katelyn I want them, not you. It’s time for you to go.” He stands and walks over to the door.
“You’re going to miss me and regret this, but I wont open the door for you. When you want me back I’ll have someone way better than you. Please don’t do this, don’t break up with me.” Rolling his eyes at the quick change in behavior he unlocks the door for her.
“Joey, I thought we were having fun. You don’t want to throw that away do you?” She asks as a final strand of hope glistens in her eyes.
Joe sighs, “it was fun, but I’d rather play with flower shop legos and bake cookies.”
“Fuck you Joe!” She stomps out with expletives shooting from her mouth. 
⍣ ೋ
“Daddy was your friend crying because you hurt her feelings?” Ellie asks with frosting covering her mouth when he arrives in the kitchen. He picks her up and kisses her sugary cheeks.
“No bub, she hurt her own feelings.” 
“Joey hurt my feelings when left to join the circus.” She pouts talking about her stuffie and licking her sticky fingers.
“Are you eating the icing before we can put it on the cookies?” He asks the orange dye covered girl.
“Nyooo.” She chuckles.
“What are we going to do with you?”
“Mommy said we’re all going to the park to feed the ducks.” She smiles. You turn around with wide eyes and an amused smirk, halting your current task of making more orange frosting.
“I did not say that. Ellie Dae why are you telling your father stories?”
“I think she wants to go feed the ducks.” Ja’Marr snorts while eating some of the cookie dough.
“Uncle Marrrr, you can’t eat more cookies! It’s for the ducks.”
“Ellie ducks don’t eat cookies.” Joe chuckles putting her on a part of the counter that’s not covered in sugar.
“Kaia said they do.” Your daughter yawns mentioning your next door neighbor’s teenage daughter that likes to babysit her.
“Well you’re going to have to ask Kaia where she found the cookies made for ducks.” Glancing over at the oven clock you hum realizing its 2pm. Naptime. Looking back over at your ex, you watch him wrap his arms around your daughter as her eyelids struggle to stay open. “Joe.” You whisper. He looks up at you then the time and nods.
“Come on babygirl, let’s go upstairs.” She whines as he lifts her, but still wraps her arms around his neck.
“But daddy, I’m not tired. Cookies.” She yawns laying her head on his chest. He smiles and kisses her head.
“I promise the cookies will be there when you wake up, and maybe we’ll even take some to the ducks.” You can’t help but smile as the pair climb the staircase up to her room. You always knew Joe would be a great father, especially when the you were surprised by the idea of having a baby so young and so early in your relationship. But he only stepped up in ways you couldn't have imagined, watching him become a father felt like one of life’s greatest privileges. It’s one of the things you love loved about him. Joe’s caring nature was unlike any other, in those 4 years together you’d never felt so loved and cherished by anyone like him.
Turning around to go back to your icing duties, you’re faced with a smirking Ja’Marr Chase. “What?”
“You’re ridiculous.” He chuckles setting a timer for the cookies that you now notice are in the oven. 
“I don’t understand.”
“You look at him the same way he looks at you, which is the exact same way when you were engaged. You just need to put the ring back on and plan the damn wedding at this point. I mean he broke up with his fling for you.”
You just shake your head at his nonsense, there was no way you and Joe would ever get back together after how it ended- after how you ended it. “No, I’m with Tee. They just had a mild disagreement, the second Ellie comes home with me he’ll be calling her back over.”
“You’re fucking with me right?” He scoffs. “You and Tee are not together.”
“How would you know?”
“He texted me the minute you got here. The only reason you two were out together was because we’re all still friends. Don’t try and bullshit me. You’ve been trying to make Joe jealous for weeks.”
“I have not, lower your voice. If you think he would ever take me back after the shit I said that night, then you’re delusional. I already fucked up with Joe.”
“But you want him to though.” He tilts his head with a soft smile. “I bet you still have the ring on you.” Your eyes go straight to the floor.
“You didn’t give it back because he wouldn’t take it. You can’t put it away because of who it reminds you of and you won’t sell it because you still care. In fact Ellie said you put it on a necklace and kept it in the smallest pocket of your purse.” When you look up, he’s somehow produced the same ring Joe proposed to you with on that beach date when Ellie was 8 months old.
“She really is a little blabber mouth.” You sniffle taking the chain.
“She’s smart and a thief. She showed it to me after you went to go clean your face. She knows how much it means to you and whether she understands it or not, she wants her mom and dad back together.”
“Oh please, this is the same little girl that wants to feed ducks sugar cookies.”
“All I’m saying is you should think about why you’re still carrying that nice ass ring around and talk to him. Alright I’m gonna head out, you got this right?” You nod and share a friendly hug.
“Remember what I said.” He says as the front door opens then shuts.
You lean over the counter with your hands on your face and let out a groan. There’s no possible way for Joe to ever take you back. You don’t even know why you still carry the ring around, but somehow leaving the house without it makes you feel untethered to reality.
“I doubt the cookies are that bad.” You gasp startled by the man leaning on the entryway to the kitchen.
“Goodness, Joe.” Your right hand covers your eyes while still clutching the gold chain. 
“Wow,” you drop your hand remembering what you were holding. “That’s something I haven’t seen in a while.”
“Yea- um. I was having it cleaned.” You bite the inside of your lip, then replace it with a pout when his face tells you he knows the full story. “Joe-
“Put it on.”
“Listen- wait what?”
You want to believe he’s joking, but the look in his eyes is all seriousness. “I want you to put the ring back on.”
“I can’t, not after the way I ended things. It wouldn’t be right.”
“You can, because I want you to. I need you to put the ring on.”
“Joe there’s something you should know.”
He sighs and takes the chain from you. “I know you and Tee hooked up once, I’m still debating on if I need to sucker punch him for it.” Then unclasps the chain and releases the 7 karat diamond into his hand. “I know that we spent the last 2 years trying to forget everything that went down between us only to remind each other every weekend when Ellie is dropped off.” He begins to fiddle with the ring between his fingers. “I also know that nothing you said that night was true.”
You gulp locking eyes with the man you’ve always wanted to call your husband. “Joe.”
“On April 10th, your mom called you and said ‘never get married’ because she had finalized her divorce with your father after spending 25 years in an unhappy marriage, that without a doubt gave you enough trauma in itself. April 11th, I came home from a night out where I drank way too much and reminded you of a part of your childhood you tried to run away from, which is something I’m extremely sorry for. April 12th, we spent the entire day arguing about the dumbest shit because I couldn’t see the pain you were harboring. Then you said ‘I can’t spend the rest of my life with a man that doesn’t care how he comes home to his family. I won’t let you run me into the mud like he did to her, I want to be happy. I can’t marry you.’ And took your ring off.” You couldn’t stop the tears from falling down your face as he recalls the last night you spent together as a couple. A night you’ve regretted since it happened.
“Joey, don’t let me do this to you. You don’t deserve this, you could do so much better better than a damaged bitch with trust issues.” With one hand he wipes your tears and with the other he takes your left hand. “Joe think about this.”
“I think there’s something you should know.” He repeats your words with a more lighthearted tone, then gets down on one knee. 
‘There’s no way, no way. Nope, he’s not doing this.’ You echo to yourself while shaking your head.
“I spent two years thinking about this. Two years driving back and forth so we could have equal time with our little girl. Two years of wondering if I’d ever have you back in my arms the way I dream of at night. Even spent one in this house thinking about how hollow it feels without you living in it. I bought it for you, so we could raise our family here together. I know this probably won’t top the first one and I don’t have a new ring yet.” He winks causing another wave of tears to fall, this time happy tears. 
“I can’t see myself happier with anyone except this damaged woman in front of me with trust issues. Shit I’m not that happy now, cause every time I look in our little girl’s eyes all I see is her beautiful mother. She’s a constant reminder of the woman I miss more than anything. I thought we could do this co-parenting thing and stay friends so Ellie could have a happy childhood, but I spend more time with you than I do without you. I don’t want to wake up with anyone else in my bed that isn’t the woman right in front of me. And I’m thanking Elliana for bringing you here, because I need you. I want you back more than anything in the world.” 
His voice starts to tremble. “I’d step on a million legos for you, bake and burn a thousand dinners for you, miss hundreds of games for you- fucking anything. Anything you want, it’s yours. Just say yes.” 
You can feel the way your heart breaks for him, just proving how much you don’t deserve him. “I can’t.” 
“Why not?”
You can’t look him in the eye and break him again. You try to suck in the sob but there’s no use.
“I’m pregnant with Tee’s baby.”
.
.
.
SIKE
.
.
.
i'm sorry that was childish, don’t hate me lol here’s the real ending
˚ ༘♡ ⋆。˚ ꕥ
“I can’t,” You giggle when his pout deepens. “You haven’t asked the question yet.”
A bright smile breaks out on his face as he sighs in relief. “You need to stop scaring me. Y/n Y/l/n, will you marry me?”
“Yes, yes I’ll marry you, Joey. I'll marry you a hundred times if I have to.” You beam as he slips the ring back in its rightful spot then stands and pulls you into the most passionate kiss. 
After two years, you’re back in the arms you love, felt the most comfortable and cherished in. You feel so lucky to have found a man, a fiance so caring, thoughtful, and understanding. Lucky that every time you pushed him away, he just pulled you in harder. And you can’t wait to finally marry him and give him everything he’s ever wanted. Including a bigger family.
♡.﹀﹀﹀﹀.♡
so any critiques, comments, concerns. i'm open to any and everything🫶🏾 oh and don't forget to reblog for more :)
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278 notes · View notes
adverbally · 1 month
Text
Promise Me Just One More Night
Written for the @steddieangstyaugust prompt “‘Please, stay?’” | wc: 1,248 | rated: M | cw: references to sexual content | tags: established relationship, moving away, last night together, hopeful ending | title from “If You Leave” by Orchestral Manoeuvres in the Dark
———
It feels a little pathetic, how quickly Steve gives in and begs. They’re both lying in Steve’s bed, still breathing heavily, damp with sweat and come (and maybe some tears), and he can’t stop thinking that this might be the last time he gets to touch Eddie like this. He whispers, “Please, stay?” without lifting his head from Eddie’s chest, too cowardly to look him in the eye.
“Steve,” Eddie sighs, like he’s about to explain again. Like Steve is just some little kid who doesn’t understand that sometimes people have to go away.
Steve knows damn well that nobody is going to stick around for him. He accepted that a long time ago. But Eddie had wormed his way into his heart over the summer and it made him start to think that maybe, just this once, someone would want to stay.
“Sorry, it’s stupid, forget I said anything,” Steve mumbles into Eddie’s skin. He keeps his gaze fixed on the tattoo just in front of his face, memorizing it like he’s tried to memorize every inch of Eddie in the past week.
Eddie slides a hand into Steve’s hair, carding through the strands with a tenderness they hardly had any time to explore. It sounds like an apology when he says, “You know why I have to go.”
He does, but that doesn’t stop the tears from burning in his eyes. “Yeah, but California?” His voice cracks a little. “That’s, like, as far as you can get without leaving the country.”
“Wayne’s got some friends out there who have a job for him. For both of us.”
“There are closer jobs. Like, in Ohio,” Steve grumbles. He’s probably proving Eddie right, acting like a child.
Eddie puts on a post British accent. “Alas, Lord Harrington, I need to take the sea air for my health. You know I have such a delicate constitution.”
Steve isn’t completely sure why that sets him off. Maybe it’s the reminder of how close he came to losing Eddie, how Eddie’s still recovering from all the damage the demobats did to him. But it’s probably because that stupid voice is the perfect example of how goofy and dramatic Eddie can be, and that just makes Steve miss him even more.
He’s not even gone yet and Steve already misses him so much he can’t stand it.
Eddie has to feel the tears dripping onto his chest, the shake of Steve’s shoulders where his arm drapes around his back. Steve’s not even being particularly quiet, so he can definitely hear him. But Eddie just holds Steve close and rubs a hand up and down his back while he cries.
“I’m gonna call you, like, every day. You’re gonna get sick of me. Like, the sound of my voice will make you wanna puke,” Eddie croons. The soft lilt of his voice is such a contrast to the words he’s saying that Steve coughs out a laugh despite himself.
“I don’t think you can afford the long distance charges,” he croaks. “Unless this new job is really good.”
“Okay, so you can call me instead,” Eddie says easily.
Steve sniffles. “Maybe I will. Then you’ll get sick of me.”
Eddie squeezes him more tightly and cranes his neck to kiss the top of Steve’s head. “Never gonna happen.”
“Okay. Just make sure you have your own phone in your bedroom so Wayne doesn’t catch you jacking off.”
He laughs so loud it almost hurts Steve’s ears. “You’re really something, Steve,” he says fondly. Steve can hear his smile.
“I love you, too.” The words slip out before Steve’s brain can catch up with his heart, but he doesn’t regret saying them until Eddie freezes beneath him. “You don’t have to say it back or anything,” he rushes to clarify, “but I wanted to tell you while we’re in the same room instead of, like, opposite sides of the country.”
Eddie wiggles until Steve rolls onto the bed next to him. They’re face to face now, so Steve can see the shine in Eddie’s eyes, even in the dark of his bedroom. “Say it again.”
“I love you.” Steve doesn’t hesitate.
His expression goes from tense to almost manic, a huge grin spreading across his face. “I love you, too.”
Eddie is watching him so intently that Steve starts to feel self-conscious. He’s sure his eyes are all red and his hair is messed up from Eddie’s hands and he’s probably making a weird face that’s some previously-unknown combination of joy and heartbreak. And Eddie’s looking at him like he’s the most beautiful thing he’s ever seen, like he’s proud to love him and he doesn’t want to leave but he has to and–
Steve is crying again. It’s worse when Eddie can see his face turning splotchy, when Steve can see how Eddie’s eyes go soft and frowny. He tries to solve both of those problems by covering his face with one of his hands, but Eddie catches his wrist and holds it against his chest. Shit, now Steve’s lip is wobbling. He closes his eyes against tears and embarrassment alike.
“Hey. You don't have to look at me but I hope you’ll listen.” Eddie pauses until Steve nods, eyes still squeezed shut. “I love you whether I’m here or in California. I’ll still think about you every day. I’ll wonder what you’re having for lunch and what you’re wearing and what movie you’re gonna pick for movie night with the kids. Yeah, it’s gonna suck that I can’t see you, or touch you, but I don’t just want you for your hot bod. You know that, right?”
“Yeah.” Steve’s voice is small and watery.
“The kids will keep you busy when school starts and the time will fly by. Maybe you can come visit at Christmas?”
Steve has to open his eyes when Eddie sounds that shy and uncertain. “I’ll visit as much as you want. What’s the next holiday, Arbor Day?”
“I think you mean Labor Day.” Eddie has perfected the art of laughing at Steve with a completely straight face.
“Shut up. Labor Day, National Lobster Day, it doesn’t matter. Any excuse to come see you.” He takes Eddie’s face in his hands and kisses him tenderly.
Eddie’s mouth is wet and red when he pulls away to look at Steve’s alarm clock. He groans. “Wayne wants to leave first thing in the morning.”
“Do you think he’d mind if you spend the night here? I know you’d have to wake up earlier, but–”
“He won’t care.” Eddie nuzzles his nose against Steve’s face. He doesn’t say what they’re both thinking, that this is their last night together for the foreseeable future and they’re gonna make the most of it.
Steve sighs. “Then stay. Please.”
They’re silent while they go about their nightly routines, trading spots in front of the bathroom sink while they brush their teeth and Steve washes his face. They settle back into bed on the sides they naturally claimed weeks ago and pull each other close. The alarm is set for an obscenely early hour and it’s not nearly enough time, but Steve tries not to think about it for now. He just lets Eddie hold him, tells him goodnight and I love you and soaks it in when Eddie says it back.
Maybe once he can be sure all of this Upside Down shit is over, he’ll need a change of scenery. California sounds nice.
237 notes · View notes
gisellaaa · 10 months
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i never doubted your loyalty once; until you decided that being loyal meant hurting your lover
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af11 | after many conversations with the fantilli family, you decided to make one last attempt to reach out to adam.
"Come on, Y/N." Luca pleaded, staring down at your in your dorm. "I don't know why you think it's a bad idea." Luca crossed his arms over his chest. Your uncertain gaze just stared at him, silence following his words. "Give me on good reason, then I'll leave it alone."
"He hates me, Luca." You stated, voice low. "Me and Adam are done, there's nothing left."
"Bullshit--dude I was the one who listened to him after you guys broke up--he doesn't hate you!" Luca quickly replied, his hands flailing up. "I'll give you my Bio notes for a whole month, even the rest of the semester."
"I don't want your notes, be so for real Luca." You cracked a smile, rolling your eyes. "What if I do it, right? Then he plays like shit on his first game, then he get's even more angry at me." You conjured up the false scenario.
"He's bound to play like shit anyways!" Luca retaliated, he was begging you at this point. "No one plays good on their debut."
"The answer is no, Luca. Now go, I know you have workouts in twenty." You got up from the desk chair, shooing Luca out of your dorm.
"But-"
"No, Luca! Go!" You pushed him gently out of your dorm. You shut the door in his face, avoiding anymore pleading from him. Once you heard his footsteps walk away from the door, you let out a deep breath, leaning your forehead against the door.
There was no way you were recording a video for this montage.
Your break up with Adam was far too fresh, still painful in your heart, and probably his. It wasn't a mutual breakup either, in fact, neither of you wanted to break up. Your last argument was one that couldn't leave your head. It didn't leave during the silent times in class, when you were trying to sleep, or in the warm afternoons where there was silent.
It racked your brain.
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"So, Ohio?" You spoke, watching Adam tug at the roots of his hair. He had been pacing around the hotel room since you guys got back. "What are we going to do, Y/N?" Adam abruptly spoke, standing in front of you.
The question took you aback, shocked that he would ask that. "What do you mean?" You tilted your head in confusion. "I mean, we can barely go three hours without being around each other. Now we are going to be hundreds of miles away from each other."
You quickly stood from the bed, anxious nerves filling your brain. "Adam--what--no, what?" You stuttered out. "We'll be able to work it out, it's not like your in California!"
"I know, I know. But still, I don't want it to cause problems between us. It'll make being away from you worse." Adam sighed, attempting to reach out and grab you hand. You quickly pulled yours away. "The fuck-"
"Why does it seem like you've already made this decision?" You stated, glaring at Adam. "Why does it seem like you've made this decision before we came here? Have you been thinking about leaving me?"
"The way your saying it is making me look like a shitty guy." Adam rolled his eyes, taking a step back from you. "Then tell me, Adam! Enlighten me about how I'm supposed to be saying this!" You shouted, a hand running through your hair.
"I mean, Y/N, we thought I was going to Anaheim. That's across the fucking country. You are telling me that thought never crossed you mind? You are telling me that the thought of distance breaking us up didn't cross your mind?" Adam spoke, his voice laced with sadness.
"Did you really think I was going to leave and that we were going to be perfectly fine?" Adam added, his eyes staring into your watering ones.
"No, I guess not." You spoke softly, tears falling down your face. "But I didn't think it was going to cause us to break up, Adam. I thought we would figure out a way to work things out. I really thought that." You shook your head, anger filling your voice once more.
"Then I think you were being naive about this." Adam deadpanned, venom lacing his voice.
"Adam, god you can call me naive, you can say I was being selfish or stupid. But, sorry for truly thinking that a three year relationship wouldn't go down the drain because you were going into the NHL. I'm sorry I didn't spend my nights wondering how we were going to end like you did. Fuck you, I hope you are lonely in Columbus. I won't be here when you wake up." You seethed, grabbing your things to rush out of his hotel room. You didn't forget to slam the door on the way out.
That night, you slept in Luca's room, crying as hard as you could.
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You weren't expecting for Luca to ask you to be in the montage, you especially weren't expecting for Julia Fantilli to call you up. She encouraged you to make a small video, even if it was five seconds, she knew it would resonate with him in the slightest bit.
So, here you sat on your bed. Your phone leaning against a filled water bottle on your nightstand. It took twenty-nine tries, to be exact. At try fifteen, you had to plan out what you were going to say on a index card.
You sent the clip off to Luca, adding a small message with it. Now you just had to wait the three days until October 12, hoping this video wouldn't cause Adam to play like shit in his debut.
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Adam knew a few of his family members and old teammates were creating something for him to watch on his birthday. He did not know that your face would pop up on the screen.
After watching a video of him from when he was younger, then Brindley, then Seamus, then his grandparents, then his brother, then his parents, he figured the video was over.
Then your face popped onto the screen.
"Hi Adam!" You spoke, your voice quiet. He recognized the surroundings quickly. You were in your dorm room at Michigan, the familiar posters from last year were still hung up on your wall. Except this time, pictures of you and Adam were missing.
Adam already had tears in his eyes, especially after watching the video from his brother. You were the last person he was expecting to be in the montage.
"I wanted to say happy birthday, and congratulations on your NHL debut. I know you probably weren't expecting this from me, but here I am." It was like you knew exactly what would be flowing through Adam's mind when you created this video.
"I'm so proud at how far you've came. I knew when I met you a long time ago you would do big things. Now, I'm sure you'll do even greater things." Your voice pained Adam more than he ever imagined. You sounded different, your voice was more sad and quiet than usual.
"I miss having you around in Michigan. I have no one to rant to about BioChem and Taylor Swift. But I know you are doing great things in Columbus. Good luck Adam, I love you." Then the video cut off.
Adam ran his hands down his face, his body feeling empty and heavy. He wasn't sure what greater god did this to knock some sense into his brain, but Adam knew he needed to fix this.
Adam had to fix it all.
719 notes · View notes
sapphic-coded · 7 months
Text
I Swear That I Don't Have A Gun
You grew up in Ohio with your father, brother, and sister. Your family was small and strange. Because of that, you were picked on relentlessly at school. Until another weird kid showed up. Her family moved in across the street from you. It wasn't long until the two of you became friends. Your friendship became the light in your life. Until it ended suddenly. Rumors followed your friend's disappearance. Russian spies. You didn't see her again until you crossed paths at work.
Series Masterlist
Natasha Romanoff x fem Reader
Warnings: Violence. Reader is a messed up assassin and misses her gun home. Childhood trauma hanging out in the background. Hunted animals. Minors DNI.
Word Count: 4.6k
Author's Note: Life has been crazy. It still is. But this series is so much fun to write. Please know that your comments and love have kept my days bright. I read all your comments. Your likes and reblogs make me do my happy dance. It makes me happy that you guys are enjoying this series as much as I am. I apologize for the wait. I hope this new chapter makes up for it!
Taglist: @natsxwife @iliketozoneout @newawakening9 @natasha-1million @ilovemcuff @taliiiaasteria @alowint @yerisdumbass @natashasilverfox @fxckmiup
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Chapter Eight: You Can't Raise Hell With A Saint
Mount Vernon, Ohio – 1993
You watched the station wagon slowly back out of your driveway from your bedroom window. As you watched, you folded and then unfolded the piece of paper in your hand several times. Your father’s departing words echoed in the back of your mind. 
“This is vital to maintaining our relationship with our allies. Remember. When the time comes, we must position ourselves on the correct side.” 
You waited until the station wagon disappeared from view before your attention shifted onto the snowman across the street. Your father is gone for the weekend. Your assigned homework is already completed and buried in your backpack. You had hoped for two uninterrupted days with your friend. You two had discovered a perfect hill for sledding not too far away. You had hoped you could return to it this weekend with Nat. But before your father had left, he had given you an assignment. One you were not allowed to ignore. 
But if you finish it quickly like your homework…
You turned away from the window and got dressed. The house was quiet as you descended the stairs and hunted through the kitchen for breakfast. Your father had given both your brother and sister assignments. You figured your siblings were already out doing them. You found an opened pack of pop-tarts hidden behind the jar of two dead mating frogs. You ate the delicious blueberry pop-tart and washed it down with tap water from the sink. Once breakfast was done, you pulled on your snow boots and put on your heavy winter coat. You unfolded your father’s note once more to reread the words hastily scribbled in fine black ink. Then, you refolded up the note and shoved it into your coat’s pocket. 
You left out the back door and pulled on your gloves as the morning winter air scratched at your face. The snow crunched beneath your boots as you headed towards the treeline. The woods behind your house stretched onwards for roughly two miles. It was one of the reasons why your father had chosen to settle here. He could disappear into this patch of quiet woodland and no one but you and your siblings would know. 
For a while, the only noise was the steady rhythm of your footsteps and the chirping of birdsong as you left your house behind and walked deep into the woods. The sunlight shone brightly off the surface of the snow and made your eyes water if you stared at it for too long. You felt the wind beginning to pick up and blow against your back as you walked. Your pace did not slow until you reached the base of a tree with a dead hare hanging from a snare. 
You knelt down into the cold snow and pulled your hunting knife from your coat pocket. You cut the rope and lifted the dead animal up by the rope’s lead. Its dark lifeless eyes stared at you and you searched for any ounce of pity. When you didn’t find any, you stood up and continued walking. The weight of the hare hanging from the small noose made you feel less alone. You kept walking until you spotted a smooth, round rock. You picked it up and it nearly covered your whole palm. 
You tied the end of the rope around the rock as you continued further into the woods. The light of the sun had started to dim when you finally reached a large pond. Your feet carried you to a narrow dock that stretched out over the water. The wooden boards groaned beneath your feet as you came to the end of the dock. You looked down into the dark water. It hadn’t frozen over yet which made your assignment easier. The wind continued to blow at your back as you tossed the dead hare into the water. The lifeless animal hit the cold water with a splash and floated on the pond’s surface for a moment. Then the dark water pulled the dead hare down into its depths. You waited for some kind of response. A sign that your assignment was complete. But nothing happened. So you turned and started the trek home. 
Your thoughts returned to your friend as you began following your footprints back the way you came. You would have the whole rest of the day to do whatever you wanted. And tomorrow you wouldn’t have to waste any time with another assignment. Your immediate future was bright and that fueled your quick pace. 
But your pace started to slow when you lost sight of your footprints in the snow. The wind that had been blowing must have covered them up. You ignored the first sour taste of fear and kept going. You had planned to just follow your tracks back home, but you could make it back without them. You had only gone in one direction. It wouldn’t be difficult to find your way back home. You shoved your gloved hands into the pockets of your heavy coat as the wind now blew against your face. 
The light of the sun continued to fade as you made new tracks in the snow. You were going in the right direction. You had to be. But you spotted new bushes and weird leaning trees that you hadn’t seen before. You felt yourself shivering against the cold as the light faded into the coming dark. You kept walking until you finally leaned against a tree and sank towards the freezing ground. You closed your eyes and tried to curl yourself up as much as you could within the fading warmth of your coat. 
You don’t know how you messed up your assignment. You thought you knew your way back. You thought this would be so easy. Your father had dragged you and your siblings out here plenty of times. Yet you’re lost and you don’t know what to do other than sit here and–
“Y/N!” 
Nat. 
Triskelion, Washington D.C. – 2012
You miss your little piece of woodland paradise. You had discovered the small cabin during your fourth job. You had been posing as a realtor for your target. The cabin had caught your eye because of its remoteness. It was tucked away along the mountainside and far enough away from all the main roads that all you heard when you stepped outside was birdsong and the wind brushing through the trees. It was the perfect spot to kill your target. The cabin had been left on the market for years and only maintained by a vendor who came out once a season to keep the place from falling apart. You would have no interruptions to deal with. If your target tried to flee, it would be a long run back to a main road. And even if your target got that far, they would need to run from there back to the nearest town. This spot was an open playground. You could kill your target however you wanted. Chase them around if you were feeling energetic. Sever their head with an axe like a lumberjack cutting up wood. 
But when you had pulled up to the cabin for the first time, you realized that you couldn’t do any of that here. Sure, you had plenty of space. The cabin was remote. The main road lightly traveled. When you let out a scream to test if anyone would come running, no one did. It wasn’t until you walked through the cabin and into each of the small, cozy rooms that you understood why you couldn’t bring your target here. The cabin felt too much like a home. 
The pictures that hung on the walls were snapshots of the owner’s life. Frames full of smiling faces and captured happy moments. You saw the lives of their children begin with innocent, small, round confused faces and stop at handsome young faces decorated in medals and gowns. The furniture bore the nicks and marks of a life used. You could even see the spots of soot left behind in the fireplace where the vendor failed to clean. 
You had only ever been in a home like this once before. You had sat down onto the couch in the cabin’s small family room and looked over at the kitchen. You imagined the smell of Nat’s home. You imagined Nat’s mother standing in the kitchen. It was the only thing you could think of. You sat there for a long time. It had been the first time in years that you thought about your friend without all the other stories hanging onto the memory. You thought about Nat. You thought about how happy you had been around her. You tried to imagine her as an adult, but you couldn’t. She was dead, and you were no longer the kid she met back in Ohio.
You ended up killing your target during a private tour of a much larger home far away from the cabin you found. By the time you had bought and moved into the cabin, the new owners of the other much larger home had only finished finding all your target’s missing fingers. The cabin had become your home. Your place to unwind after your jobs. You had filled it with everything you knew that belonged in a home. You loved the feeling of walking through the front door after a long job and just breathing in the smell of your home. 
Your bunk is nothing like your cabin. You are buried beneath all the important floors. Your room has no windows. Your room has four white walls, harsh overhead lights, and a white tiled floor. The brightness of the room often gives you a headache which is why your favorite time to be in your bunk is when you are sleeping. All the lights are off and you can listen to the hum of the air conditioner. The best part is that you don’t have to wear that stupid suit when you are in here. You are even allowed to speak, however the only person you ever talk to is Rumlow. 
You miss your cabin so much.
The lights in your room come on when the door opens. The twin sized mattress you lay on offers the bare minimum of comfort, yet you don’t bother to sit up. Instead, as you wake and hear familiar footsteps, you drape your arm over your eyes. It successfully blocks out the harsh light, but does nothing to stop the approaching footsteps.    
“The bosses up top were impressed with your Bardstown mission,” Rumlow says. 
You can’t fight back the small laugh that works its way past your curling lips. With your arm draped over your eyes you can see Sikora’s bent neck clearly. You can still hear each crunch as his body collided down each step. “I killed one person and they weren’t even my target.”
“Which worked out in your favor,” Rumlow says as his approaching footsteps stop. “You played your part. The mission was a success, and no one will look deeper than that.” 
You lift your arm away from your eyes and let it flop down to your side. The harsh lights already make your eyes water, but you focus on Rumlow who stands beside your bunk looking down at you. “Do you find your work fulfilling?” Instead of answering you, he turns and steps away from your bunk. You sit up. “Satisfaction is very important to me.” 
Rumlow causally makes his way over to a small table. He picks up the half finished bottle of bourbon Nat gave you before leaving Bardstown. You couldn’t drink it then. Removing your helmet around her would go against everything Rumlow has been drilling into your head. But you had ripped your helmet off the moment you returned to your bunk. You had brought the bottle to your lips, and you had drunk so much while thinking of her. 
“What are you asking for?” he asks. 
“Let me work,” you reply. “Without the suit and the rules. Tell me who the bosses want dead, give me back my gun, and let me kill them.” 
Rumlow sets the bottle down. “That’s not how this works.” 
You roll your eyes and flop back down onto your bunk. 
“I also don’t have your gun,” he adds. 
You close your eyes and swallow back the urge to yell. You hate this role so much. If you were impressing these bosses so much, why wouldn’t they let you show them how good you really were? What was the point of all the secrets if most of SHIELD was really HYDRA anyways? Or at least, most of the important people. Or whatever Rumlow had told you during those first few days. 
“The bosses were also pleased with how you handled Romanoff,” Rumlow says. 
Your eyes open and you stare up at the bland white ceiling. You fight back the smile you know is coming when you think back to the best day of your life. You hope you end up on another mission like that. Just the two of you. The one little new piece of your life that made tolerating this role just a bit more manageable. 
“How do you feel?” Rumlow asks. 
Like you want to pour over the office directory until you find her office. You’d race up there and sneak in when she isn’t around. You’d sit in the comfortable office chair that you hope she has up there. You’d take your helmet off and wait. And when she finally enters you’d spin around in her chair for a proper dramatic entrance. 
You turn your head to look at Rumlow. “Depressed. My favorite gun is lost.” 
Rumlow holds your stare. You know what he’s looking for. Perhaps if he could read minds then he would have found it. Instead, you hide all your fantasies and memories behind your little lie. It’s easy. You do the same trick your father always did. String together a story from bits and pieces of truth and mold it into what you need. You know it worked when Rumlow finally breaks your little staring contest. You don’t move when he turns away from you. You don’t want to give away your victory. 
“You have training with Rollins in twenty,” Rumlow says before he leaves. 
You wait until the door to your room shuts behind him before you get up. You move towards the table and grab the half empty bottle of bourbon. You bring it to your lips and take a sip. The smooth amber liquid washes across your tongue and burns down your throat. You think of when she handed you this bottle. You remember the way her hands briefly brushed across your gloved ones. 
You set the bottle down and change while your mind lingers in that memory. Rollins is already waiting for you when you arrive at one of the training rooms a few floors up. Bright sunlight pours through the windows that run along the far side of the training room. You feel uncomfortably hot underneath your suit, and you already miss the cool kiss of the air conditioning that hums in your bunk. When you see Rollins in the training room, your interior visor screen lights up with data you already knew. Except for the healing ribs. That part is new. 
Rollins leads you over to a bunch of blue mats. The hand to hand combat drills still feel weird. You know what you are supposed to do. You had learned back when Rumlow first shoved you into this stupid suit that going for kill strikes was not in compliance. You had to work your way up to kill strikes to make everything more believable. 
“You’re not an assassin anymore. You’re a SHIELD agent.” 
Which wasn’t even the truth. You found that this dance they forced you to do felt awkward. Your movements felt sloppy as you fought not to go for the opening that would put your target down permanently. And when a kill strike was considered acceptable, it always came far too late. It never felt right. These lessons pressed up against the memories of your training back in Ohio, and it often left you feeling more frustrated than anything else. 
Your training with Rollins is quickly following the same trend as all the others. Your punches feel sluggish and off. Every time Rollins dodges your hit or counters, you know exactly what you should have done instead. Your frustration grows as you hold back. Your thoughts scream at you in the roar of your father’s voice. You want to give in. Why trade blows when it can easily be only you hitting your target? But you’ve already tried giving in. You had managed to bloody your knuckles a bit before Rumlow had started talking to you about compliance. Everything had stopped despite your urge to keep going. Then you were back at the beginning as if your outburst hadn’t happened. 
Rollins dodges one of your punches and delivers a blow to your torso that pushes you back a step. He doesn’t advance. He stands there and waits as you swallow back all the foul words that usually tumble out of your mouth whenever something hurts. It’s hard not to say anything. Especially when he stands there looking bored. But you aren’t eager for them to start fucking with your mind again, so you keep quiet. The sound of your heavy breaths fills up your helmet as you return to your spot in front of Rollins. You duck under his right arm as it swings out. Your fist slams into his healing ribs and the noise he makes is exactly what you needed to hear. His cry is short-lived as he quickly masks it with a grunt. He retreats from you, and you let him. You watch as his breaths become more labored as his hands press against the very spot you hit. You don’t know if you just broke one of his healing ribs. It hadn’t been your intention, but you certainly didn’t pull that punch. 
“Aren’t you supposed to be resting?” 
Her voice steals your attention. She stands by the door dressed in a dark gray sweatshirt and black joggers. Her arms are crossed in front of her chest, and her head tilts slightly as her question is first met with silence. Well, more like your silence and Rollins’ heavy breaths. You could shatter this stretch of quiet in a heartbeat, and you want to. Your teeth sink into your bottom lip as you bury the urge. Your eyes greedily take in the sight of your friend. You are grateful for your stupid helmet as your eyes run down the length of her legs and stop at the black sneakers that cover her feet. 
“I thought you were heading back up to New York with Rogers,” Rollins finally says. 
“Eventually,” she replies with a slight shrug and walks further into the training room. “But I have some stuff I need to take care of first.” She uncrosses her arms as she casually approaches the mats. “You should head back before anyone from medical catches you here.”  
“I’m a bit busy training the quiet one,” Rollins says. 
You should have tried to break his ribs. He’d be too busy dealing with that pain to put a premature end to this wonderful moment. 
“I can take over,” she offers. 
Your helmet conceals the wide smile that cuts across your face. You don’t know what you have done to deserve so much alone time with your friend, but you will happily do whatever it takes to keep ending up in these wonderful moments. You don’t hear Rollins leave, and when you look over at the man, you can tell that he is unsure if he should leave. The questions he cannot voice are written plainly across his face and your smile falters. Is he…is he not going to leave? Is he really going to ruin this for you? You want to tell him that his concerns are unnecessary. If you were going to spill the beans, you would have done it the moment you and Nat were alone on the quinjet. Or sometime in Bardstown. Not in some fancy building secretly full of HYDRA agents ready to put you down with just a couple of random words. 
“Don’t worry,” her voice pulls your attention back to her. Despite the fact that she is addressing Rollins, her focus is on you. You spot the beginnings of a smirk that stirs up something inside you. Something exciting and warm. “I won’t break her.” 
You hear Rollins sigh and you feel the buzz of your excitement grow. 
“If you do, you’re the one having that conversation with Rumlow,” Rollins replies. “Not me.” Rollins gives you one last warning look before leaving. You watch the man’s retreating form and feel at ease when you see his hand come up to gingerly touch the spot where you hit him. 
When you look back over at Nat, you find her pulling her dark gray sweatshirt over her head. The uncomfortable heat that sticks to your skin beneath your suit returns as you feel your hands begin to sweat inside your gloves. You ignore the information that attempts to clog up your visor. Your focus is first on the black sleeveless shirt she wears. The hem of the shirt gets caught briefly on her sweatshirt and lifts to reveal the barest hint of a firm ab. You blink when the shirt falls back down. 
Nat sets her sweatshirt aside and steps onto the mats. “Are they always that serious around you?” 
You nod, but you are not thinking about Rollins, or Rumlow, or how painfully serious both tend to be at all times. You are too consumed by the realization that you have never seen this much of your friend before. No. That wasn’t it. You can recall several old memories of warm summer days and cool lake water. But you hadn’t felt like this back then. You are staring at her lean biceps and you just want to touch her. 
She steps forward. “Your missions with them must be fun.” She shifts into a fighting stance and raises her fists. “Let’s see what you can do.” 
You raise your fists and shift your stance. Your smirk at your friend’s earlier sarcasm falls away as your visor’s screen identifies multiple places to strike first. You know what you want to do, but that option isn’t listed anywhere on the screen. If it wasn’t for Nat standing in front of you, you would have quickly returned to your sour, frustrated mood. But instead, you wait for her to strike first. A few moments pass and all you two do is slowly circle the mats. You realize that she’s waiting for you to strike first. A hint of your concealed smile returns. You happily oblige. 
Your fist swings towards her, and you feel her arm quickly block your strike. Your focus is on her face, and you can tell that she barely had to think about her reaction. You continue to move in a slow circle and she does the same. You fall back into the training that Rumlow has been drilling into you since they freed you from that chair. You move in and strike. You frown slightly as she blocks or dodges every one of your strikes. It makes you feel like she’s in your mind. That she knew what you planned to do the exact same time you did. You retreat back a step when your fifth punch doesn’t land. 
You wait for her to move in with her attack, but it doesn’t come. You know she can’t see your face, but it feels like she can when she offers a small shrug and that small smile creeps back in. 
“I’m guessing that was your warm-up?” 
You know it’s bait, but you take it anyway. You move in with another series of attacks. Every single one of your punches feels just as sluggish as before. The rhythm feels off. You feel like each attack is wrong. Your strikes aren’t landing and just as you are about to sink into the seething grip of your frustration, you see Nat’s fist coming towards you. Your hand catches her wrist before her fist can make contact with your helmet. 
You watch as her brow arches in a silent question. You ignore the data that races across your visor’s screen and focus on the weight of her wrist in your hand. The familiarity of it lures out pieces of warmer memories. The touch of her hand taking yours. How her touch would melt the rigid cold left after early summer mornings with your father. You abandon the awkward dance you have been following. You can hear whispers of your father’s voice in the back of your mind as you take a breath and move. 
Her wrist slips free before you can pull her towards you. She goes on the offensive and the attacks you block send you back a few steps. You spy her foot moving to hook behind yours and you maneuver away from that pitfall only to feel her fist connect with your side. The pain is barely there. You two are sparring. But it lights a very familiar fire inside of you. 
You press forward with an onslaught of strikes that feel more natural. She continues to block most of them until you manage to slip past her defenses and successfully hook your foot behind hers. As you sweep her foot out from underneath her, her hands come up to latch onto the fabric of your stupid suit. She lets her falling body pull you down, and you both land on your side. Your one hand reaches to dislodge the grip she has on your suit while your other instinctively reaches out towards her neck. You feel her legs wrap around your waist and in one quick movement, you are on your back. Her hand stops yours from reaching her throat and pins it against the mat. She quickly pins your other hand to the mat, and you stare up at her as your heavy breaths fog up your interior visor. 
She doesn’t let go of your hands as she looks down at you. You know all she can see is her own reflection staring back at her, and you want her to pull the stupid helmet off your head. You wouldn’t be breaking the rules if she exposed this game. But she doesn’t. Instead, she leans down just an inch or two closer and asks, “How do you feel about opera?” 
You shrug. 
Her smile returns as she finally lets go of your hands. She gets up and you instantly miss her warm weight on top of you. You sit up as she returns to where she left her sweatshirt. She digs into her sweatshirt’s pocket, pulls something out, and tosses it towards you. You catch it. You can feel another burst of excitement rush through you as you stare at the phone in your hand. 
“That’s yours,” Nat says as she pulls her sweatshirt back on. “I thought it might be easier for us to communicate. I already loaded my number into your phone.” 
You have her phone number. You don’t move from your spot on the mats as your fingers wrap tenderly around the phone. Direct access to your friend without needing to go through anyone else or jump through any additional hoops. It feels like you’re back in Ohio. All you need to do is cross the street, and she’s there waiting for you. 
“I’ll be in contact soon,” she says as she moves towards the door. “Don’t put Rollins back in medical while I’m away.” 
You watch her leave. You wait until she’s gone before you lean backwards onto the mat and let out a quiet, short laugh.
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joeys-babe · 8 months
Text
Joey B Imagines: Light My Fire*
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Summary: Flashback. You and Joe are at LSU and so in love. Joe’s win of the National Title turns into a night you two will remember forever…
Warnings: smut
Pairing: Joe Burrow x reader
Imagine universe: Into The Mystic
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January 13, 2020
He did it. Joe fuckin’ did it.
After everything I’d watched Joe go through, from high school football to not starting at Ohio State to transferring, I got to witness Joe become a National Champion.
I'd never felt so proud of my boyfriend before, watching him hoist that trophy in the air as I cried in Robin’s arms.
“He did it!” - you cried
“He couldn't have done it without you sweetie. You're his everything.” - Robin
——
When Joe came to the family area, he first hugged his parents, him and his dad sharing such a sweet moment.
After their embrace ended, Joe turned to me, and in a matter of seconds, I was in his arms as he spun me around.
“I love you so much!” - Joe
“I love you more! You did it, Joey! I'm so proud of you.” - you
My words were mumbled as I was yelling them into his neck, but Joe understood every word.
“You know I couldn't have gotten this far without you? Thank you for everything, baby.” - Joe
“Thank you for letting me be a part of this journey. I'll follow you wherever you go.” - you
I pulled away and looked into his eyes, seeing that they were a little misty.
“I love you more than life, y/n.” - Joe
The embrace with Joe lasted longer than anticipated, like a whole five minutes, and I could sense eyes on us.
When I pulled away from Joe, Robin had a slight eyebrow-raised expression, wondering why Joe hugged me longer than her. She understood a little bit because she knew Joe saw his future in me.
“Hey, you're still spending the night with me, yeah?” - Joe
You'd be able to hear the smirk in his voice without even looking at his face like I was now.
“Yes. Why?” - you grinned
“I'm feeling some celebratory…” - Joe
My eyes went wide when Joe whispered the word sex.
“Joseph! Your parents are right behind us.” - you
Joe laughed at my worriedness and looked around to make sure his parents weren't watching us. The next thing I knew, Joe slipped his hands down to my ass and pressed his lips to mine.
When we broke apart, Joe licked his lips and showed me a devilish grin.
“You might wanna take a power nap when you get to my place, it's gonna be a looong night for you.” - Joe
Soon, Joe was walking away and back toward the locker room entrance, leaving me stunned.
——
I didn’t know how long I'd been asleep or the fact that I'd been asleep at all when Joe walked through his apartment door.
“There's my girl.” - Joe grinned
Joe dropped his bags and made his way over to the couch, quickly crawling on top of me with a smirk on his face.
“My national champion.” - you smirked
I watched Joe’s eyes turn dark as the nickname left my lips.
“Say it again.” - Joe
“My national champion.” - you
“Fuck.” - Joe grunted
He dropped his hips to where they were against mine and slowly started grinding himself into my hips.
“Wait-” - you
Joe immediately stopped.
“What?” - Joe
“Do you… have a cigar?” - you
“I got a whole pack of ‘em, why?” - Joe
“It sounds weird to admit out loud, but you looked so hot smoking it earlier.” - you
The smirk that formed on Joe’s lips was purely cocky.
“You want me to smoke one while we make love, huh baby?” - Joe
“Please, Joey.” - you
Joe nodded and crawled off of me. I watched him walk over to his bag and pull out a box of cigars. He sat them down on the kitchen table and quickly pulled all of his clothes off.
The sight of Joe putting the unlit cigar in his mouth while completely naked might be the hottest thing I've ever seen. With his perfect arms, torso, shoulders, thighs, and hard-awaiting length, my eyes didn't know where to look.
If I could grab my phone and take a picture of this sight, I would, but there were too many risks.
Joe laughed without even looking up at me.
“Take a picture, it'll last longer.” - Joe
Did he read my mind? What the hell?
Doing as Joe said, I picked up my phone off of the end table and snapped a picture.
“You're a work of art.” - you
“Thank you.” - Joe smiled
Joe walked back over to the couch and plopped down next to me, handing me the lighter in the process.
“Light it.” - Joe
“I- how?” - you
My brain was scattered just by the pure sight of Joe. He was like a drug.
Delicately, Joe reached out and grabbed my hand, directing it toward his throbbing cock. My pulse reacted when he spit into my hand and wrapped it around his length.
Next, Joe directed my other hand - the one holding the lighter - to the cigar held loosely between his lips.
“Atta girl.” - Joe
Now the cigar was lit, and Joe looked more perfect than ever.
“You know how to stroke a cock, baby. I don't gotta show you how to do that too, right?” - Joe
“N-no…” - you
“Then get to it.” - Joe
Feeling kinda awkward for some reason, I slowly started moving my hand. Joe seemed to appreciate it, though.
The look of Joe’s head thrown back with the cigar in his mouth had a gush of wetness seep into my panties.
“Oh god.” - Joe groaned
By now, I was feeling more confident and was able to stroke him faster.
“Use your mouth- please.” - Joe
His please came out as a whimper, and I gladly did as he said. Moving my head down to take Joe in my mouth, he was gone in just a matter of minutes.
“That was so good.” - Joe 
I was out of breath and already feeling pain in the back of my throat from Joe’s swollen cock hitting the back of it.
“You okay, beautiful?” - Joe
“Mhm.” - you
“You sure? Was I too rough?” - Joe
“No, you were perfect like always. I want you so bad.” - you
Within seconds, Joe was on top of me, his cigar only inches away from my face.
“God, I want inside you.” - Joe
“Please do.” - you
Joe didn't waste any time, and soon I was getting lost in the feel of his thick cock moving inside me.
“You feel so good- so fuckin’ wet.” - Joe
Nothing was better than this, being able to be so vulnerable with someone and yet feel so confident. Joe made me feel so many different feelings.
“You do- too. Joey.” - you moaned
Joe came first, which never happened. He was always making sure that I finished before him because my pleasure was the only thing on his mind. Tonight, though, was Joe’s night, and I was trying my hardest to make him feel like the champion he was.
Basking in the post-sex bliss, Joe lay on top of me, his head on my chest as my hand rubbed over his back.
“I'm so proud of you.” - you
“Thank you for always believing in me. Throughout high school, at Ohio State, and when I transferred. You were always there in the stands and on the sidelines. You've been one of the biggest reasons why I didn't give up. I know nothing I can say will show how appreciative I am, but just know I love you so fuckin’ much. More than the championship win.” - Joe
I ran my fingers through Joe’s hair and repeatedly kissed his forehead, my throat tightening and heart soaring at each word leaving his mouth.
“I've been there since the bleached blonde hair, seen you through two mullets, and I'll be there till you're fully grey or bald.” - you
“I hope I don't go bald, I'll get a toupée.” - Joe
Busting out laughing at his less-than-serious statement, Joe and I’s laughs joined together to make a beautiful soundtrack of the night.
At one point, Joe was almost asleep, but a knock on his apartment had us both wide-eyed in panic.
“Joey!” - Robin
“Your parents are here?!” - you whisper yelled
Joe jumped off of the couch and started putting his clothes back on, I ran into the bedroom when I heard keys jingling on the other side of the door.
“They're probably already sleeping. I forgot I had a key.” - Robin
Thankfully, I was in Joe’s bedroom with the door shut when Robin got the door open.
“Oh, hi son…” - Jimmy
“Hey guys! Didn't know you were coming…” - Joe
“Surprise! Where's y/n?” - Robin
“She's, uh… just got out of the shower.” - Joe
Jimmy laughed, and Joe looked at him with a narrowed eye look. His face saying, what are you laughing at?
“So you two were celebrating?” - Jimmy
“Uh… what do you mean?” - Joe
“Son, your shorts are on inside out and your shirts backward.” - Jimmy
My shoulders dropped in annoyance as I listened to the conversation from the bedroom. So much for not getting caught.
I facepalmed as Joe stuttered out an excuse, but Jimmy and Robin only laughed. If his parents didn't know we had sex before, they sure as hell do now.
Damn it, Joe!
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Authors note: idk what to put
Requests for this fic;
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Hope you enjoyed! 💕
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bishopsbeloved · 8 months
Text
the art of falling in love (part four)
natasha romanoff x fem reader
best friend!yelena belova, aroace!yelena belova, internalised homophobia, found family trope, coming of age, angst, fluff (eventual happy ending)
part one | part two | part three | part four (4k words) | part five | epilogue
read this fic on ao3!
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Natalia Romanova has lived her whole life in maybes.
When she was five years old and first banished to an orphanage in a far vast snowy corner of Russia, she thought to herself, okay. Maybe this will be the place that I find my forever family. Surely no place can be worse than that which I have come from. But the other girls she lived with were taller and crueler, and almost a year passed before a certain scraggly blonde rascal stumbled into sharing a room with her. Without hesitation she began causing havoc for every single resident. Natalia liked her immediately. It was not long before the two would share a bed at night and call one another sister.
Maybe I was right, Natalia would think to herself sleepily, as she and tiny Yelena huddled together beneath a duvet to survive the cold winter nights. Maybe this is my forever family.
It only took one day for that to fall apart for her, though. It hadn’t even occurred to her that someone might adopt Yelena without her too, or vice versa. And when that happened, and Yelena was torn away, she was at a loss.
“Не волнуйся,” Yelena reassured her as she sped around their tiny bedroom, gathering her many trinkets and treasures into a bag. “It’s okay. My mama and papa, they are very lovely, they promise they will come back for you. We will be a family together, in America. A new start. Together.” She held out a pinky earnestly.
“Together,” Natalia repeated, sealing the deal.
But two years after Yelena’s departure, she began to wonder if maybe her sister had been wrong.
She still can’t remember much of the day that they finally, finally came back for her. She was eight, and you and Yelena were both seven. Of course, she didn’t know you even existed at first — not until the long journey back, gazing down at the motherland below them as they left it behind, when Yelena babbled endlessly about her new best friend she’d made in Ohio. She doesn’t remember much of that, either — the whole day felt too perfect to be real. It’s all a blur. But still to this day, proudly framed by Alexi and hung above the fireplace, are the photos he took the day she came home.
Only a week into her life in Ohio did she ask her mother if she could change her name. Natalia Romanova was too difficult for Americans to pronounce, and it didn’t feel American. It felt as though it were just another of countless things that screamed I don’t belong. Maybe it would help her feel more acclimated to her new home. And when she worded it like that, who was Melina to deny her? So Natalia Romanova became Natasha Romanoff. You barely even batted an eyelid when the news reached you, and she’d often catch herself smiling when you went out of your way to use her full name in any situation you could.
Although it feels as though she’s loved you forever, it’s true that she was wary of you at first. That fateful moment she first met you, you came tearing into her new home to spend time with her sister and she was scared you’d take her away — but you didn’t. You shared her. And as time went on you began to share parts of yourself with Nat, too.
She’ll remember the day you won her over until her dying breath. December 3 — almost six months since she first moved to Ohio, and her first birthday there. You’d stayed over the night before, as you often did even then, and in the morning you approached her with wide adoring eyes and something clasped carefully in your hands.
“Natasha,” you began, with a slight tremor in your voice, “um, it is your birthday, obviously,” you glanced over at the gaudy banners Alexi had strung proudly around the house in declaration of this fact, “and, uhm, I know we haven’t known each other super long, or anything, but, yeah,” you finished lamely, and held out your hands to her, opening them up. “I found this super cool rock. Alexi helped me clean it. It’s pink.”
It was super cool, Natasha decided. Pink had become her favourite colour as of late — ever since she’d learnt that in America it’s for girls. She looked from the sparkly rock to your earnest, hopeful face and back again, and decided then and there that she loved you. (And maybe you even loved her back.)
The nature of said love did not make itself known to her for a good few years; even before it did, she made her best efforts to dismiss it, though. She very quickly learnt just how American girls were supposed to be — which did not include bright blue hair, or a desire to kiss other girls. Within just a few days of starting public school Natasha had bleached the dye from her hair, quashed down any potential interest in Daphne from Scooby Doo, and at night would carefully practise the American way of pronouncing words in the mirror — without her gentle Russian tinge. She tacked up posters of male pop stars in her room, and began to strategically pick which boys in her class she’d be crushing on next. Maybe, just maybe, if she kept all of this up then she’d be able to fit into her surroundings the way she was somehow never able to in the orphanage.
And for the most part, she did. She found herself becoming one of the most popular girls in class. She’d discovered that actually she was very good at fitting in, as long as she paid enough attention to everyone else. And she felt good about herself — as long as she didn’t pay attention to you and Yelena, who were entirely unbothered by the social norms she adhered so much to, and seemed a whole lot better off for it. It was entirely uncool to be so close with your sister. Her annoying little sister, and her quiet lovely best friend. Yes, as long as she avoided the two of you wherever she could, she’d be fine.
That’s how the years passed, for a long time. Natasha eventually outgrew her desire to distance herself from Yelena, and she returned to the protective tendencies she had harboured for the blonde when they were so young and alone, but what she didn’t outgrow was her need to fit in. That followed her way into high school. By sophomore year she was cheer captain and everyone in school knew her name. (She wasn’t mean, though, she always made sure of that. And she made it known that if anyone were to mess with Yelena — or you, by extension, as by this point people had started referring to you as the twins — there would be consequences.) She had friends, she had boyfriends, she had invites to parties. And as long as Natasha pretended she didn’t have a massive interest in you or a mental list of your likes and dislikes, she would be fine. Probably.
When she was sixteen she realised with startling clarity that the massive interest she acted as though she didn’t have in you was love. She and two of her good friends, Sharon and Maria, were animatedly discussing whether Sharon really loved her boyfriend or not. And the way love was described, romantic love, was identical to what she felt for you (and what any idiot could tell you felt for her, as much as everyone seemed to have agreed to pretend that you didn’t). An inexplicable attraction drawing her to you, an interest in anything you were interested in (see that time she was ten and stayed up all night researching your favourite cartoon just so she could discuss it with you over breakfast the next morning), a desire to just be with you forever. That was love. She loved you.
Oh, shit.
“You’re awful quiet, Nat,” Maria commented. Natasha cleared her throat and took a sip of juice. “Anything on your mind?”
“Just that Sharon needs to dump her shitbag of a boyfriend,” she replied shortly. Maria clapped her hands together in triumph, while Sharon let out a huff of annoyance.
“That’s what I keep saying,” Maria told her proudly, as Sharon spluttered in protest. The discussion resumed and the matter was forgotten. Natasha shoved her discovery to the back of her mind, hoping and praying she could un-discover it. Maybe if she did, things would stay okay.
Try as she might, she couldn’t, but she has tried; more determined than ever to be the perfect American girl. Over dinners she pretends to be annoyed at the teasing, saying that her accent’s gone, she’s no Russian, the American agenda has got her, that she’s almost as American as you.
“Our token Yankees,” Alexi often says merrily, to this day, clapping both you and her on the back with force that makes you wince and her giggle. She’ll whine and wrinkle her nose at him (while you just sit and blush), but secretly revel in the praise that her efforts have been so fruitful.
Barely any time into this school year, her senior year, she realised that she hadn’t had a boyfriend for a suspiciously long time.
“You and James would be cute,” offered Sharon, pointing with her fork at where her good friend and fellow Slav sat across the cafeteria, laughing about something.
“Yes,” came Natasha’s thoughtful reply, “we would, wouldn’t we?”
Every single aspect of her life was coldly calculated, unfeeling, sterile. Natasha Romanoff knew what she wanted and she would obtain it. Her pursuit of Bucky Barnes was no different. He was politely reciprocal at first, and the two entered what Nat’s friends called a situationship over the coming months. It wasn’t until a Stark house party that he turned her down.
“Natasha,” he said gently, and the word was so loud despite the music that blared only a few rooms away. He only had to say that and she knew. She sighed, and sat down on the bed in defeat, only to look up in surprise at his next words.
“I don’t… I like Steve.”
Not even Natasha could understand why she started crying. But Buck was so kind, so patient, and he held her until her tears dried. When she could speak evenly again she opened her mouth and everything came flooding out. The way she felt for you and her deep, innate fear of being different.
Bucky was quiet for a few moments in contemplation. Then he said, “I’m scared, too. Me and Steve are like you and Y/N, we known each other all our lives, and it’s like, what if whatever I do or say or feel ruins that? But you gotta… it’s…” He scratched at the back of his head. “You gotta trust it’ll work out. If you love each other proper, then even if she don’t like you back, you’ll still have her. In your life. It’ll be okay, you know. You just gotta have faith.”
Of course, Natasha knew without a shadow of a doubt how hopelessly head over heels you were for her. Rejection wasn’t what she feared. But she wasn’t sure how to word that to Bucky without sounding entirely conceited, so she just nodded. After that night, though, the two were a whole lot closer, and in no time at all they established a kind of beard situation — they’d act ambiguously involved in public so that in private they could affiliate with the ones their hearts truly desired. It wasn’t as though there weren’t queer people within their school, because of course there were, but both feared for the loss of their social standing so intensely that they saw no other option.
It was Bucky who pushed Nat to kiss you at the New Year’s party.
“If it goes wrong, come find me and we’ll drink,” he shouted over the blaring music. Both of them knew it wouldn’t go wrong, though.
But she drank anyway — for luck, she told herself, downing an impressive amount in one. She was Russian, even when she pretended she was not. A perk of that was being able to handle her liquor.
The New Year’s kiss famously went swimmingly, and Nat felt so giddy the next morning that she marvelled she hadn’t done this sooner. The two of you began to sneak around, which pleased her greatly, but she felt the words you didn’t say during the silence that would sometimes descend on the two of you. Your slight twitchiness, the way you would work yourself up to say something only to dismiss it at the last second. You didn’t want to ask what are we? for fear of the probable answer — and Natasha didn’t have an answer for you, anyway. She liked the way things were now; she had a pretty girl wrapped around her finger who she could sneak around with in private, and she could simultaneously maintain the social status she’d always had in public. She was certain that if you were ever to make her pick between the two she would spiral. Eventually you seemed to take the hint, and the hopeful silences stopped.
It never really occurred to her that she wasn’t treating you well until quite a few months into your relationship — around June, after Stark’s spring break party, once Yelena had started teasing you about a mystery girl. Every time it was mentioned in front of her she would tense, but you handled it with surprising and admirable nonchalance, and her sister seemed to have no suspicion it was her that was spoken of.
Natasha came back late one night from a hangout with friends. She’d forgotten her key and, assuming everyone was asleep, decided to let herself in through the garage rather than disturb anyone. But you and Yelena were still up and enjoying a quiet night in, as the two of you often did, huddled together under blankets on the sofa in a way that would make Natasha reminisce on the way she and Yelena used to do that in the orphanage — except they had done that to survive the bitter cold, whilst the two of you did so merely to enjoy reality TV reruns. It warmed Natasha to see her baby sister happy, at least.
The noise of one Kardashian fighting another (Natasha always got them mixed up) drowned out her quiet arrival, and the two of you were mid-conversation. She made for the stairs, not really wanting nor caring to intrude, but froze as she tuned into Yelena’s next words.
“You never really mention your mystery girl anymore, anyway,” the blonde was saying. “Did something happen? I can hurt someone.”
Natasha craned her neck to catch your next words.
“Nothing happened,” you said quietly. Defeatedly. “I just… I don’t know. I don’t think she likes me as much as I like her.”
“Ah, конечно нет, impossible,” drawled Yelena. “You are adorable, утенок. Everyone likes you.”
You murmured something unintelligible, and Yelena scoffed, but Natasha didn’t need to hear any more. She crawled up the stairs as if the world were about to slip away from beneath her feet. Suddenly everything around her was so overwhelmingly real, and she realised with sickening clarity that you were real, too. She spent the rest of that night lying in her bed, unsleeping, unmoving, counting the paint strokes on the ceiling and wondering if she could’ve gone her whole life without knowing that she’s a bad person. Maybe she has. 
That was probably the beginning of the end. When she looked you the next morning it was as though she was seeing you for the first time — you were quiet, you were pale, there were dark circles under your eyes. You were smaller somehow, as though something had defeated you completely. And Nat knew in that moment that she was too much of a coward to give herself to you, so the kindest thing she could do was let you go. If she was lucky then maybe, just maybe, she wouldn’t lose you completely if she set you free now.
Right now it’s prom night. Seeing you dancing with Sam was one of the most gut-wrenching sights she’s ever endured, but he at least seems to make you happier than she ever did. It didn’t make her very happy to look at, though, so she convinced Buck to drop her home on his way back to Steve’s. (Prom was their first official date and, as Buck informed her with a proud grin as she left the car, it went fantastic.) Melina and Alexi are out — every other Friday is their date night, and while Yelena groans and gags at how ridiculously in love their parents are, Natasha just finds it sweet and hopes she’ll have something like that someday. But you’re the closest it’s ever come to that for her, and she’s fucked that one. Royally.
“Hi, Liho,” she opens the front door and mumbles to the cat, who is sat in the hall expectantly. His haunches rise defensively, and Nat just sighs. He is very much your cat, not hers, and in recent times he seems to have been picking up on the turmoil she’s been putting you through. “Look, man, she’s out being happy, without me. Isn’t that enough?”
Liho hisses, and stalks with his head held high out of the front door.
“Yeah, whatever, leave then,” Nat grumbles, and kicks the door shut behind him. Even through the thick oakwood she can hear the noises of annoyance he makes back at her.
She kicks off her heels and throws herself onto the sofa, and lays there for a long time. It would be nice, she thinks to herself, if she could just stay here forever, and never have to face the world again. And she does for a while, but eventually the front door slams, bringing in cold air and with it the announcement that you and Yelena are home. Nat tenses as she recognises the sounds of your crying, and leaps to her feet, sliding across the smooth wooden floors in her stockinged feet towards you.
“What’s going on?” she pants, taking in the scene. You’re cradling something dark and vaguely furry to your chest, and Yelena is fussing over it worriedly. She realises like a punch to the gut that it’s Liho you’re holding. “Holy shit, what —”
She freezes as she realises she’s the one who let him outside. Is he supposed to outside? She doesn’t know anything about this goddamn cat, he’s not hers. Shit. 
“Call Alexi,” you choke out. Natasha stands still frozen in shock, so Yelena lets out a mutter of “бесполезный” and charges towards the landline herself.
“Are you— okay?” Nat tries uncertainly. “What —”
“Piss off, Nat,” you cry. Ouch. Okay, she probably deserves that.
“Sorry,” she says quietly, and steps back from you. You stand in silence for a few moments until Yelena comes skidding back out into the hall.
“He’s nearly home anyway,” she pants. “He says don’t call the vet, not until Ma has looked him, we should just stop the bleeding. It was definitely a car, probably a hit and run so he said to check the doorbell camera thingy. What is their name?”
“That is the scientific term, yes,” Natasha nods, and you make a noise that’s both a laugh and a sob. “Um, I think Dad has the app on his iPad.” Not that he knows how to use it. He’s such a comedically giant man that seeing him trying to navigate the tiny device offers her a steady stream of entertainment. (“Глупый кусок жести. Делай как я говорю!”)
“On it,” Yelena nods, and sprints off to where she last saw the device.
“I’m sorry,” Nat offers again, once her sister’s out of earshot.
“Not now, Nat,” you sigh tiredly, and you sound so broken that she just wants to scoop you up and protect you from all the evil in the world. But she’s subjected you to that evil, whether she meant to or not, and now she has to deal with the consequences.
Yelena is gone and oddly quiet for a suspiciously long time.
“You okay?” you call, cupping the cat desperately to your chest as you pad off in search of her. Unsure of what else to do, Natasha follows you, hanging behind awkwardly and making sure to give you enough space.
Yelena is stood still as anything in the kitchen, staring at the iPad propped up on the counter, rewatching one clip over and over on the security camera app. Nat can’t tell what it’s of, at first, but the exact moment you realise you let out a squeak, and squeeze Liho even closer to your chest. Only a moment later does Natasha understand what it is.
It’s from quite a while ago — the timestamp says sometime late at night in March. In the clip Nat’s car pulls up onto the driveway, with her at the wheel and you in the passenger’s seat. Once the car stops, Nat leans over and she kisses you. And you kiss back. On camera.
Liho lets out a noise of pain at how tightly you’re gripping him to you. Yelena stares blankly at the screen as the video plays over and over again.
“Lena?” you ask quietly, and when the blonde turns round her eyes are glossy. “I don’t —”
The next thing Natasha knows is a sharp pain shooting through her nose, and she steps back in shock, because there’s no way Yelena’s just hit her.
“What the fuck,” Yelena says, and there’s that scratchy sound to her voice that’s only ever there when she’s trying not to cry. “The one person who is off limits and you just couldn’t help yourself, could you?”
“Lena,” you cry out in alarm as the blonde raises her fist again. “Don’t, it wasn’t — it was an accident —”
“Oh, what,” she’s rounding on you now, “so you just slipped and fell into my sister’s —”
“No,” you plead desperately, “it wasn’t like that.”
“You were the mystery girl all along,” Yelena shouts, and presses her lips together with her eyes screwed tightly shut. “All the time you were right there. You lied to me.” She raises her fist again, but Nat is prepared this time and catches it neatly in her own.
“Don’t,” she says evenly, but she isn’t prepared for the hatred that burns in the green eyes that meet hers.
“How many months were you sneaking around behind my back?” Yelena hisses. Nat still holds her wrist tightly, so she merely turns her head to address you next. “Ты - лжец, how long have you been using me for her?”
“I wasn’t,” you plead, and whatever is shouted after that is indiscernible. After a few moments of noise the front door opens again, and Melina and Alexi stumble in, with a sense of urgency about them.
“Oh goodness, what is all this shouting, girls?” Melina asks loudly, and at the sound of her raised voice you all instinctively fall quiet. “In fact, this is not important. Where is this poor cat?”
You hold out the bundle of bandages and fur to her, face shiny with tears, and she scoops him up gently. “Will he be okay?”
“I don’t know,” she says shortly. “I will get him to the vet. I’ll call you.” She kisses your forehead, then Yelena’s, then Natasha’s on the way out and the front door slams behind her.
Yelena turns on you again with no less venom than before.
“You,” she says, “are not my family. And neither are you,” she adds to Natasha. “Do not speak to me.” She storms out of the room, and you, Nat and Alexi watch her leave, stunned.
“Well,” says Alexi with a jovial chuckle, clapping his hands and rubbing them together, “she seems a little upset, да?”
167 notes · View notes
sc0tters · 1 year
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All Bark No Bite | Ethan Edwards
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summary: you and Ethan have disliked each other from the moment you met. so what happens when you connect with some old friends from high school that just so happen to be on the other team that send Ethan the wrong idea?
request: yes/no
warnings: sexual themes, p in v, thigh riding, minor mention of spanking, use of a Polaroid camera whilst having sex, swearing, use of the nickname brat and princess once or twice, use of y/n once too.
word count: 2.6k
authors note: wrote this last night after a rugby game, was running on three hours of sleep and pure excitement after the all blacks won… very much did love writing about Ethan and this was actually meant to be up yesterday but I literally got home at 1 in the morning. this request was highly detailed so I hope I did it justice!
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You hated him.
Your and Ethan's little rivalry went back all the way to the first day of freshman year when he took your drink order at the coffee shop on campus because he had the same order and was late.
From that day on you hoped that he would rot in hell.
The hockey team were put in the middle of it all though when you joined the team as the new photographer. When you saw his face you were ready to quit, but you needed Coach Naurato's signature at the end of the season in order to pass the first year of your degree thus you stayed.
But that didn't mean that it was all cordial. The screaming matches you two would have were so frequent to the point where you two were not allowed in the same room together alone, not that either of you were ever going to complain about that.
So when you two hadn't said a single thing to each other in over two weeks, you were practically on cloud nine. You were at the top in all of your classes, you had a fuck buddy in Mark, and Ethan hadn't done anything to screw either of those two things up.
Ethan hated what you and Mark were, not only because of the fact that he said a wall with your bed buddy but also because the sounds of your moans had quickly become the only material he could use to jack-off to.
Just last night after hearing you leave the sophomore house when he dozed off to sleep Ethan was met with a harsh surprise, that was a dream about you.
He had to admit that he knew most of the image of you was true, he had seen your lacy thong that landed up in Marks washing and one time when you were in your office at the Yost you accidentally spilt a smoothie down your white shirt. Despite shutting the door, you had forgotten to shut the blinds by the window you had inside the office. That meant when Ethan walked past he was giving a front row seat to watch you get semi undressed. He knew it was wrong how his mouth watered at the sight of your blue bra but it just looked like it was made for your breasts.
Even though it was game day at the Yost, Ethan avoided you like the plague as he attempted to get that image out of his mind.
That's why it was so confusing to you when the conversation you were having with two of the Ohio state players was cut short by the Canadian. He had been glaring at the two boys unaware that you were catching up with them because the three of you went to high school together.
You wanted to slap that glare off of Ethan's face but as the players from Ohio were scattered around you knew that you would get in trouble if you did indeed hit him.
So instead when you saw he had his bag ready to go you dragged him to your office. It was far away enough from the main parts of the players areas so that nobody would hear you two.
You shut the door behind you and was ready to unleash your full fury at him "what the hell was that?" You both spoke at the same time.
Ethan was quicker to let out a scoff "you wanna tell me?" He asked taking a step towards you "fucking touching them like that." The boy added as you were now against your table as you tried to avoid being too close to him.
Yeah you had hugged both boys but that was because you hadn't seen them since the previous year "green is not a good colour for you," you pointed out with a laugh as he was acting rather jealous.
The comment made him roll his eyes "could you maybe not be a little brat for one second?" He cocked his head as he had now pushed you onto the table.
You knew that you were teetering on a fine line with him "what are you going to do if I don't?" The smirk was clear on your face and it only became more evident when his own facial expressions hardened.
He wanted to do it, he wanted to show you but Mark was acting like a mental blocker. Sure it was stupid but Ethan was a man of bro code "knew you'd be all bark and no bite." You mumbled shaking your head as you moved your hand to his chest to move past him.
That seemed to press the on button in the boys head as his hand cupped your cheek, and before you both knew it he was now kissing you.
It took you a second before you kissed him back causing what quickly became a fight between your tongues that you lost when Ethan placed a slap on your ass. The gesture was small but it brought a moan out of you and he felt it in his shorts.
The sounds that he had heard so much from the room next door was now right in front of him.
The Canadian pulled you towards the couch as he sat down letting you land on top of him "let's get this off of you," he motioned to the strings of your sweatpants as you nodded quickly pulling the gray pants off.
The boy looked at the sight as he released out a groan "look at you in these pretty little panties," he mumbled as he rested his hand on hip as he wanted to move your hoodie that was hiding the fabric.
As his fingers dug in that bone it caused you to grind against his thigh, eliciting another moan from you.
It caught Ethan off guard as he looked up at you "you like that?" He asked as he brushed the loose strands of your hair behind your ear.
You placed your hands on his shoulders "yeah," you moaned as you leaned forward to kiss him again.
His hands didn't let up as he continued to help you reach what you both hoped was your high "god you’re wet,” Ethan’s head fell back as the fabric on his thigh was quickly becoming soaked.
When his head dropped you took the opportunity to kiss his neck making the effort to draw hickeys on the area.
He squeezed your thighs as he moved his hand back to your ass to place another smack on it “been waiting to have you like this.” The hockey player confessed as he watched you smile.
It was a shit eating grin “you must have been so jealous of Mark then pretty boy.” You cooed letting out a sigh as your mouth formed an o shape.
Ethan scoffed at the mention of his housemate “that mouth of yours is going to get you in some hot water,” he warned as he pushed his lips into a thin line.
In the best of times you said some things that you probably weren’t meant to “it’s not like you’re going to do anything about it.” You teased, reminding him of what you had said earlier “all bark. No bite,” you pecked his lips between the two sentences as you bit the inside of your cheek trying your best to suppress a moan when the boy forced your hips into his thigh.
He knew he shouldn’t have reacted because you were simply trying to get under his skin “up,” Ethan placed you next to him on the couch as he began to unbuckle his pants.
You furrowed your eyebrows as you were left speechless “you got condoms princess?” The Canadian asked as he as he knew that he had none in his bag.
The sound of your laughter could be heard as you nodded getting up to grab the box that was in a drawer. Ethan thought that you had kept them because you and Mark had slept together before on this couch. When in fact one of the freshmen asked you to get him some once, not wanting to know what size Rutger was you just told him to grab what he needed from the drawer.
Ethan had kicked his pants off and had now caught the attention of your camera that was sat on the table next to the couch.
He met you in the middle of the room in nothing more than his boxers “let’s get this off of you,” the hockey player muttered as he tugged at the end of your hoodie. You lifted up your arms in an attempt to help his efforts “you knew you were gonna get fucked today didn’t ya?” He groaned seeing that you were in a matching set.
A smirk was evident on your face, “Mark usually fucks me real good after a big win,” that was the honest truth, Mark always landed up back in your dorm after a powerful team performance “lay down pretty boy,” your voice was soft as you sent him a smile.
The Canadian scoffed “what makes you think that you’re in charge?” He asked still listening to you.
He watched as you rolled the condom over his cock “thought brats always get what they want?” You showed him that you weren’t going to let him forget about what he called you.
You smiled as you straddled over his thighs using his cock to tease your clit before you slid onto it “fuck,” you groaned as his hands found their familiar home on your hips “taking me so well,” his breath was hot against the shell of your neck as he helped you fuck yourself on him.
The sound of skin slapping could have been heard from anyone in that hallway but thankfully all of the umich players were far too focused on celebrating the big win.
Ethan was bigger than Mark which was honestly really surprising to you because you always thought that the Canadian screamed small dick energy.
But as he managed to hit spots that Mark could only ever scratch “so good,” your eyes screwed shut as Ethan wrapped his lips around your nipple.
He sucked at your breast letting his hand massage the other one “E,” you moaned as your fingers raked through his hair slightly pulling at it “wanna take a picture of you,” you confessed letting your thoughts be voiced.
You were honestly surprised that you were able to form that coherent sentence as you could feel the coil in your stomach that was getting tighter by the second.
It was weird, usually your camera was only something that you used for the team on the ice or during funny moments. This was fitting under neither category “here I was thinking that I was the one with no bite.” Ethan watched as you reached over to grab the Polaroid camera that was next to your big camera. The boy was able to use this moment to fuck you at a different angle almost causing you to land flat on your face by the surprise movement “it’s my job to be the little shit,” you mumbled sending him a glare.
Ethan let out a laugh “sorry princess,” he apologised and attempted to make it up to your by leaving a trail of kisses from your jaw back down to your breasts.
As his face was nuzzled between the two you took the moment to take that picture letting out a whimper as he looked back up at you “my turn,” the hockey player reached out with one hand to grab the camera and used his other to rub his thumb over your clit.
Your head fell back and it caused him to get the perfect picture. As the piece of film came out he knew that the image of your scrunched up face trailing down to your breasts that were quickly becoming more visibly marked by the second was you to be one that was going to live in his wallet.
For safe keeping’s of course but also for a little bit of material that he could use as he pleased.
He liked how he was pulling moans out of your mouth quicker than he had ever heard Mark do it.
Ethan knew that it was wrong but subconsciously he had made a competition within himself to outcompete the boy that he had heard you with so many times already.
It was like if the Canadian could make you feel better than his Michigan born teammate then maybe you’d cut things out with Mark then.
Maybe even you’d pick Ethan up as a fuck buddy instead.
But he was pulled from his thoughts as you clenched around him practically sucking the life out of his cock as he was brought back to reality “you’re so good to me,” you cooed as the attention to your clit was bringing you ever so closer to your high.
He placed a soft kiss to your collar bone “you wanna be a good girl and come for me?” He asked just increasing the rate of which his thumb rubbed the sensitive nub as you began to bounce your hips against him.
The coil in your stomach was so tight that it almost hurt “fuck me wow!” You yelled as your whole body shook as you even felt the orgasm in your toes.
Thankfully for you the boy was right behind you as you throbbing and clenching around him spurred on his orgasm, causing him to mumble a string of so good as he helped you ride out your high.
You found the energy in yourself to move off of him as your body collapsed on the couch next to him but thankfully on the side that didn’t have the now fully processed photos.
Because we can’t have those getting damaged now can we?
Ethan smiled as he ran his fingers through your hair “we should go that again some other time,” he proposed causing you to let out a giggle as it was the first thing that he had said to you after sex.
You looked at him leaning in to peck his lips as you were still in that fucked out state “my pretty little brat,” the Canadian mumbled as he brushed your hair out of your face.
As you leaned forward to grab your hoodie his phone went off with a string of notifications “someone’s popular,” you teased sending him a smile.
Ethan let out a laugh “I could say the same thing to you,” he had a giant smirk on his face as he flipped his phone around to you.
Mark 🛑 you know where y/n is? saw you with her earlier
Your face turned red as you had totally forgotten about the fact that you and Mark were actually meant to do some work for a class after the game.
So you let out a groan as you tried to get up “I gotta go,” you announced as you pulled your sweatpants over your legs not bothering to find your panties as you figured that you could leave them as a memento for the Canadian.
You were grateful that you had a spare pair of slides in the office as you didn’t feel like putting on your airforces “you can let yourself out right?” You asked as you grabbed the photo of him and your phone.
Speechless all Ethan could do was nod.
He clearly thought that your evening went down worse than his did.
Maybe this wasn’t meant to happen again.
860 notes · View notes
yichuuonvenus · 7 months
Text
Charleston Girl
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Dark!Arvin Russell x Reader
~Description~
You were the wealthy good girl from the “better” side of Knockemstiff, Ohio only that was so far from the truth. Arvin was never one to judge for you being a hidden troublemaker but he can’t help but want to straighten out a girl who doesn’t want to be handled. 
~Warnings~
Rape/Non-con, Underage drinking, Smoking, Fingering, Forced Orgasm, semi-public sex
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“It’s so pretty on you,” you said as Lenora gave you a twirl. She was wearing a pretty pink tea-length dress. It was one of your own. You had so many from Momma, that you didn’t bother hanging this one up. It was in a box in your attic. You hadn’t thought of it until Lenora asked you about wearing something to the dance and what you would wear.
All you thought about was going to the dance with Lenora. You couldn’t care less about what you were going to wear. It’s always been that way. You and Lenora. You both were two peas in a pod. You were never seen without the other the day you found each other. It was in Kindergarten after Tommy Matson pushed quiet, good Lenora into the mud. He got a bad black eye and you got a new best friend. As you both grew up, you wrestled less with boys your age and found yourself under their sheets while Lenora became a godly goody two shoes. You kept up with the persona of the do-gooder for Momma of course. There was no way of talking your way out of one of Momma’s lectures. 
So you tried your hardest to seem like that good rich girl from the “better side” of Knockemstiff, Ohio. Many people didn’t look past the facade. You played it up so well going to church, never staying out late, never drinking or smoking. Little did everyone know you were doing more than they even realized. No one saw past it. Well, mostly everyone didn’t except for Arvin Russel. You didn’t know Lenora’s cousin that well even when you were at their house most of the time. He never talked much to you only gruff hellos and a few forced waves. 
He knew what you were plain as day but he never spoke on it. Never called you out for your sinful ways when you and Momma were over and Emma was going on about how much of a good girl you are, when you would laugh and giggle next to Lenora during prayer, or when you would lie to the boys you flirted with about being a virgin. 
Arvin never even batted an eye. That was until you found yourself being flirted with by Tommy Matson. He was just a dalliance in your eyes. He didn’t mean much to you plus it wasn’t like you were actually planning on sleeping with him but to Arvin… 
Arvin acted as if you sold yourself to the devil. 
He treated you so coldly after he saw you with Tommy one day. You had been kissing something you always did. Tommy got too handsy when you finally called it off. You rolled your eyes when he cursed about you being a tease and how Susie already went to third base with him. You spit the taste of him out and wiped your mouth. 
“Not all of us are easy like Susie Cox…” you snarled.
He rolled his eyes before spitting, “I was told you were easier than Susie Cox.” 
You cursed at him before shoving him away only to find Arvin looking in your direction with a hard glare. You stared back not knowing whether to give him a hard glare too. You chose to leave. Tommy was being a total drag anyway.  
“Good luck findin’ a way home,” Tommy said as you walked off. You couldn’t stop the middle finger that raised from you as you walked away with your arms crossed over your chest. 
You made your way down the road to your house. It wasn’t far from where you were now. So the walk wouldn't be anyways. You were by yourself for what seemed like ten minutes before hearing the sound of a car slow down next to you. You ignored it, thinking it was Tommy until a sound came from inside of the car. A sound from a voice you didn't want to hear right now. 
You stopped dead in your tracks and sighed, “Arvin…” 
You didn’t want to see him, especially not after your make-out succession with Tommy Matson. To be honest you would rather have him be Tommy than Arvin. 
“Get in,” he bit out. 
You hesitated a bit. You could tell he was upset and you could figure out a good and well enough reason as to why. He opened the door to his truck and you hurried in. It was quiet, so quiet it had you listening to the wind from outside the car for comfort. You wanted him to say something instead of this awkward silence that had your insides ripping themselves out. 
Finally, you couldn’t bear it any longer and said something. 
“Don’t tell Momma,” you whispered as you stared out into the road. 
You didn’t know why you said it because it wasn’t like he would’ve. He never did and yet… you had this overwhelming feeling that today might’ve been different, You could hear his grip tighten on the wheel ever so slightly at the plea. 
“And if I do?” He quietly asked. That caused you to finally look at him. You blinked in his direction, and he kept his eyes straight on the road. 
“She’ll kill me.”
“Is that such a bad thing?” he grunted as he pulled into your driveway. You stared at him as he finally turned his attention to you. His frown and hardened eyes stared right back at you. 
You swallowed, “Please… don’t tell Momma.”
He stared at you for what seemed like a long time before he eventually tilted his head, with a small nod. You thanked him for the ride and then that was it. You both never talked about it again nor was there even a reason to. To find your cousin’s best friend making out with a guy who bullied them both would have anyone shaking their heads at the sight. To this day you still don’t really know why you agreed to it in the first place. You supposed it was you were just bored and Tommy was the only one near that had anything interesting about him. 
You shook your head as Lenora pulled you up from the flowery bed. 
“Your turn,” she said with a smile, “You need a pretty dress too.” 
Lenora shuffled through the old boxes of dresses. It could’ve been decades worth of dresses. Momma had a keen eye for style. Lenora pulled out a pale blue dress you’ve never seen before. You smiled at it when Lenora held it up to you in the mirror. 
“Gorgeous.” 
You stared at it for a bit before Lenora spoke up again, “Hurry and put in on.”
You nodded and went to your bathroom. When you got the dress on you noticed how much prettier it was. The ruffles needed to be puffed out more, but it was a beautiful dress. When you came out Lenora couldn’t stop smiling and complimenting you about how you looked in it. You giggled when she twirled you around her. 
“Well don’t y’all look so pretty,” Momma said as you both smiled towards her. 
“Don’t we?”
She started to walk closer but you found Arvin right behind her. Your smile faltered a bit at the sight of him. Momma smiled at him as she gestured to you and Lenora. Arvin cleared out his throat a bit before agreeing. 
“Oh is it time to leave already?” Lenora asked. 
Arvin nodded as he stared at you both, mainly you. You didn’t know how you felt about the look he gave you. It was a soft gaze, softer than the day he saw you with Tommy Matson that’s for sure. You turned and grabbed Lenora’s hand trying to ignore Arvin’s eyes, “Let's go pick up your things, hm?” 
Lenora nodded and followed you back to your room. You helped pack the rest of her things and sent Lenora on her way with Arvin, who still looked at you with a strange look you couldn’t pinpoint. 
. . . 
You held the bottle to your lips chugging down the burning whiskey quickly you knew that if you didn’t it would all come bubbling up. 
“Slow down, sugar. What’s the rush?” the blonde boy slurred with a chuckle he was way drunker than you by a tenfold. Time and time again he always told you that he could hold his liquor and time and time again you always proved him wrong. 
You rolled your eyes and pushed him away when his hands started to palm at your thighs. It wasn’t the first time Ricky tried to pull something like this. You could usually forgive it because he would cry about how sorry he was the next day. You huffed and closed your eyes, drinking the last bit of the whiskey before throwing it down. You could feel your body warming up finally after an hour or so sitting there for what felt like forever with this boy. 
“Ricky, if I wanted to fuck something I wouldn’t have called you.” You said so bluntly it had him frowning and leaning forward. 
“Sorry,” he mumbled and crossed his arms over his chest. 
“It’s okay,” you sighed. You pulled out a cigarette one you stole from Momma, it was one you knew she wouldn’t be missing. You lit it up and took a small drag from it. “I’m gettin’ tired.” You tried to do a convincing yawn. It worked since Ricky was too drunk to notice how fake it was. 
“I'm going to start headin’ home, Rick.”
“This late? It’s dark out...” 
“I’ll be fine I'm just down the road from you,” you stated as you pulled your cardigan around you. You gave him a wave and left. The real reason why you left was you couldn’t stand having to take care of boys when they were drunk. It reminded you too much of your father.
You got far away enough to where you could only hear the sound of the wind blowing through you. You kicked a few rocks and missed causing you to slip and fall on your side. You could barely feel the scrape on the side of your arm courtesy of the alcohol Ricky supplied you. You laughed at yourself mostly because you magically saved your cig. You took a long drag and inhaled deeply. You picked yourself back up a task that now seemed a lot more difficult than normal. You swayed a bit and tried to keep yourself upright. You could make it to your house: just another mile or two to go. You continued on your merry way, taking one last hit of your cig before throwing it down and stomping on it. 
By then you didn’t notice the sound of a car slowing down by you. You would’ve broken out in a run, that was if you could run. Thankfully it wasn’t a cop but the sight that was held before you had you cursing underneath your breath. 
Arvin stared at you for what seemed like a long time before he huffed and opened the passenger seat door. You would’ve ignored it and kept walking if your whole body didn’t feel like you were carrying bags of sand. You made your way in, closed the door, and leaned your head against the window. You knew you probably smelled like a cheap liquor store, so Arvin could easily guess what you had been doing. 
It was quiet for a minute, you could tell he wasn’t as upset as when you found you and Tommy but he was disappointed. The car slowed back down a bit and pulled into an area with a lot of brush. 
“I don’t get why Lenora associates with you…” he calmly said as he put the car in park. “You two are so different.”
You huffed and stared at the window. You weren’t going to get lectured by a boy, especially Arvin Russel. 
“How are we so different?” You chuckled as you stared out into the dense forest. You turned your head to find Arvin looking directly at you his eyes were unnerving you a bit. You can tell he mumbled something but you couldn’t make it out, you were a bit too drunk. You thought you could hold your liquor, not tonight. 
You didn’t understand what happened at first. You found his lips on yours and his arms around your waist. It was all too quick for your drunk mind to comprehend. 
“Ar- Arvin,” You mumbled into his lips. 
He shallowed your pleas instantly with his tongue as he forced it into your mouth. You usually didn’t like it when boys would try to take control and it was no different now. You tried your best to fight him off but your slaps were weak while he was tasting your mouth. You moaned into him when he pressed a spot on your thighs it had you trying to close them but Arvin only pushed them wider. You could finally breathe again when he pulled his mouth off of you but instead opted to kiss your jaw and the side of your neck. You could feel his fingers on your underwear. They slowly rubbed up and down and you could feel the pair becoming wet. 
“You’re fucking drippin’ is that all for me?” he sighed as he pulled your underwear to the side and stared at it. Never in your experience has a boy even taken a peak. All the other times it was dark with you usually on top. It made you feel uncomfortable to have him this close. To have him staring at an intimate spot. To have him be the one that was overpowering you. It made you feel small, and you didn’t like the feeling of not being in control. He entered with a finger slowly bringing it out and in before adding another one. 
“Arvin please,” you gasped when he curled his fingers in a way that had you tensing. You pulled at his wrist until you felt his fingers go a bit faster. 
“Say that again,” he leaned over your body and whispered in your ear. “Say please and say my name again.”
“P- please, Arvin.”
Arvin kissed your lips as soon as those words left your mouth. His fingers didn’t stop nor slow once. Back and forth back and forth while you were squirming and moaning beneath him. Your hips met up with his hand every time causing his other hand to hold over your stomach to make you stay still. You cried out when his thumb started to rub at your clit. It was all too much for you, you were too weak, too intoxicated to get him off of you. It got to the point where he had you whining out for him. Begging him pleading for him to let you come. He smiled a devilish smile that had you furrowing your eyebrows, kissed your cheek, and nodded. You saw white and grabbed onto his hand that was holding you down. You moaned so loudly you swore that the woods were still echoing the sound that left your lips. Your body was too hot and paralyzed to even move. You breathed deeply as he fixed up your underwear and smoothed over your skirt. He stuck his fingers in his mouth tasting you while he stared at you. He stared at you while he did it. You could’ve slapped him if you weren’t too out of it to say something. 
“Let's get you home, hmm?” he said a bit out of breath too. 
You nodded and tried to pick yourself back up to a comfortable position. You both were deathly silent in the truck. The only thing that could be heard was the sound of your breathing. When he finally pulled into your driveway you thanked him and went on your way. You didn’t turn back as you went inside of your house and you didn’t hear him pull out until you closed the door. 
. . . 
“Y’all look like princesses,” Momma said as she fluffed up your dress and then did the same for Lenora. 
Emma smiled as she watched you both from the dining room chair. 
“Arvin is drivin’ y’all to the dance, right?” Emma asked as she got up and leaned against the archway. 
“Yeah,” Lenora said happily. 
You could’ve broken something right then and there. 
“Arvin?” you said lowly and Lenora nodded in a smile. She didn’t notice how upset you were but Momma did. 
“Don’t worry I am sure other people are going to be comin’ up in trucks too,” she giggled as she fixed your hair again. 
You weren’t worried about that yet you played along. You sighed at Momma and Emma picked up your guys’s shoes. You didn’t want to go out of your house all of a sudden. You didn’t want to go and see him. You haven’t seen him in over a month. You didn’t know how you managed not seeing him considering he was basically Lenora’s brother. Yet you did, you hid away. You haven’t been out drinking since that night which made some of your “other” friends upset. You couldn’t give them the real answer as to why so you opted to just say you were grounded. 
Lenora held your hand and guided you outside. Momma and Emma followed behind, smiling as soon as Arvin’s truck was in their line of sight. 
“Be good girls,” Emma said as you and Lenora jumped into Arvin’s truck. You both gave them a quick wave and went on your way. 
The car wasn’t silent but it wasn’t very talkative either. Lenora seemed to notice the complete energy shift and she was hesitant to start the conversation. Somehow she did. She and Arvin did some small talk. Now and then she invited you to a conversation. You would reply with one-word answers. Finally, you made it to the dance you knew that some people were already tipsy before even walking in just from the way they walked. 
As soon as you and Lenora walked out of Arvin’s truck she checked on you. She whispered when she asked if you were alright. You only nodded. You didn’t want to be near Arvin for a moment more. She accepted it and walked you to the door. You glance to your right to see Tommy smile at you with a brown paper bag he isn’t careful hiding. 
“You go on in, I'll meet you inside, okay?” You said and Lenora looked between you and Tommy. She didn’t look pleased but she didn’t say anything. She nodded and walked in. 
You felt bad and you knew that what you were doing was bad. What you were about to do was impulsive but you couldn’t stop yourself as you walked towards Tommy. His little gang wasn’t there with him, it was just him with a bottle. 
“I knew you couldn’t hold up on a good time forever,” he said. 
You frowned and took the bottle from his hand. You downed whatever it was easily. It was sweet and burned the back of your throat. It was a pleasant burn, one that made you feel a bit better about leaving Lenora. You leaned against Tommy’s car, never noticing how he only stared at you. 
“You look beautiful tonight…” 
“I’m sure Susie would agree too,” you quietly said as you sipped the bottle. 
“You’re still mad at that?”
“You said that I was easier than Susie Cox. Who wouldn’t be mad at that,” you quipped.
He stared at your lips then your eyes and only smiled. His hand touched your cheek, smoothing out your jawline and then finally holding it. 
“You know I don’t believe that…” he whispered as he moved his face towards your lips. 
You let him kiss you and you smiled. He was an idiot and a bully but you still let him kiss you. You couldn’t fully get why you did. You closed your eyes as you let him fully relax onto you. His hands started to make their way down to your neck then your back. It was calming, you felt calm as he held you. That was until you felt air circulate you, and Tommy was on the ground with Arvin on top of him hitting him repeatedly. You gasped as you stared at them. You couldn’t even scream from how stunned you were at the sight. 
“Stop, Stop it! Arvin quit!” You yelled at him and pulled at him but you couldn’t get him off of Tommy. “Please, Arvin please stop.” 
You could feel tears in your eyes. You know once you started crying you couldn’t stop. He only stopped when blood started pouring from Tommy’s nose. You yelped at the sight of his face. The whimpering sounds of the younger man were startling to hear. You couldn’t quell it though as you were being pulled away. 
You were farther away from the dance from Tommy’s bloody face. You cried when Arvin shoved you against his truck, “Why did you do that?”
“How could you willingly give yourself to that boy?” 
You didn’t know why he asked that or why he even thought it was any of his business.
“You’re not my dad. I shouldn’t have to tell you why I do the things I do and it shouldn’t bother you.” 
“I don’t think you understand…” he quietly said as he took your hair in his hands. You screeched when he pulled your head back. He quickly covered your mouth. The searing pain of your hair being ripped and pulled back had you sobbing. You could barely look at Arvin from how blurry it all was. 
“From the moment I touched you I claimed you. You don’t get to whore yourself around anymore. Not with me around to stop it.” His sharp words made you quiver against him. “Unless you want me to go to your mother and tell her all the sinful things I’ve watched you do.” 
You shook your head whimpering at how tight his hands were around your hair. 
“Are you going to be good from now on?” He asked and you nodded your head. His lips curved up at that. “Turn around, hold your dress up, and bend over against the truck.” 
You paused for a moment before finally doing what he ordered. You knew crying wasn’t going to get you out of this but you couldn’t stop the tears that traveled down your face. You held up your dress and you bent over the side of his truck. He held your hips tightly and pulled you back so your ass could fully be seen by him. He slapped it harshly once and then again and again. You could barely hold yourself in the position from how bad his slaps burned into your skin. When he was done he pulled down your underwear and stuffed his fingers inside you. 
“Soakin’ my fingers,” he whispered in your ear. You tensed at that. Your nails felt like they were going to snap as you gripped his truck for support. 
You heard the sound of his zipper going down and the ruffling of clothing. If you could make yourself run right now you would’ve been you couldn’t wield yourself to move. Not even an inch. You gasped when you felt his head push into you. It was going to be a tight fit and you didn’t know if you could handle it. He was so thick that you could feel every vein and inch of him. You whimpered when he finally was flushed against you. 
“That’s my good girl,” he said as he smoothed over your ass. 
His touch was soft against you like he was saying sorry for slapping you but his thrusts were deep and rough. He was sending a message through them through each powerful thrust. You moaned at the feel of him and when he pulled you close to him, your back was to his chest. 
“You’re mine now,” he grunted. “No one else gets to use this anymore. Just me, only me.”
You nodded as he fucked you against his truck. You squeezed your eyes shut when he hit a spot within you that had you cursing his name. He held his hand over your mouth and with one final thrust had you seeing stars. You came all over him. He didn’t stop only going in harder than before. You didn’t think he would come inside you not until he whispered breathily about how you were milking him dry. You mumbled under his hand trying to plead with him. But he only chuckled and held his other hand to your stomach. His finger slipped onto your clit rubbing it over and over again. 
You didn’t know you had another in you until you were coming around him a second time. This time it sent him off the edge too. You sobbed when he held himself there planting himself deep inside you. When he pulled out you cringed at the feel of his come dripping down your thighs. No boy has ever came inside you there was no possible way you would ever risk getting pregnant. Yet Arvin did it. Without your permission. You wanted to hit him, to curse at him but you couldn’t even move. Arvin pushed some of his come back into you and pulled your underwear back up. 
“Now go inside and give Lenora a good time.”
You nodded quietly doing what he told you to do. You could barely walk but somehow you made it to Lenora. She could tell something happened to you but to be honest you were too out of it to even notice. Just grabbed her and danced. Here on the floor, you could forget about Arvin and your newfound terrifying relationship with him.
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fiapartridge · 7 months
Note
💌 adam fantilli????
AAA IVE BEEN ON SUCH AN ADAM HIGH ofc ofc
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"Come with me," he whispered in your ear, his voice a soft melody that painted love notes on the canvas of your mind. With Adam, everything faded away. Stars lost their sparkle, the prettiest of colors were found within his eyes, and the fictional characters you knew only in the books--who treated the girl right, who never missed a beat--were right there--with Adam. 
As the ocean serenaded in the background, the expansive beach lay forgotten as you furrowed your brows, lifting your head from his chest. Wrapped in his oversized UMich hoodie, you gazed at him like a lost puppy.
He loved those eyes, your smile, and the way your laughter lit up your face. That was his favorite thing, you know--- making you laugh. Just to see that smile.
He had missed that smile since moving to Ohio. At the draft, once his name was called, you felt an exhale escape your lips. You were glad that he didn't have to be across the country had he been drafted to the Ducks, but Columbus still felt so far. You missed him. You knew it, Luca knew it, your parents knew it too. You weren't you without him, and knowingly, he wasn't Adam without you.
You furrowed your brows. "Where?"
He grinned softly. "Columbus? I just bought an apartment there. My bed is extra big," he teased, "and I hate being away from you."
"I hate it too," you whispered.
Drawing you closer, he enveloped you in his arms, your head finding solace on his chest as he ran his fingers through your hair. His heart raced with the fear of rejection, afraid that moving in together might strain your relationship; that you might not want it--want him.
But then you said, "Okay," so softly that Adam wondered if he had imagined it.
"Okay?" he asked.
“Okay.”
In a surge of joy, he swept you up into his arms, showering kisses all over your face as you giggled, simultaneously pushing him away and pulling him closer.
Grinning, a rosy hue spread across his cheeks as he gazed down at you. "Good, because I can't really get a refund on the vanity I may have gotten you a couple of days ago."
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yelenasdiary · 11 months
Text
Do What You Have To Do
Pairing: Biker! Yelena Belova x Fem! Reader
Summary: Months after you made the final decision to leave your girlfriend’s illegal lifestyle, she finds you and she wants answers.
Translations: detka (baby)
Warnings: Angst, depression, isolation, Dark Thoughts, mentions of dark thoughts, language warning, mentions of drinking, mentions of guns | 1.7K
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Buying a lakeside house in the mountains of Tahoe to get as far away from your now ex girlfriend and her motorcycle club wasn't easy, but you knew you had to do it. You needed a new start, a new life, a new beginning and as painful as it was, you knew you had to leave everybody you knew and loved behind. Your friends and close family members would never understand your reasonings to leave but it was better for everybody this way, at least that's what you thought. 
You weren't even sure how you got to this point. At first, dating Yelena was like a dream and she made you feel so many things you had never felt before. Fast forward three years later and things weren't the same. You knew exactly what her role in her motorcycle club was, you knew exactly that things were never how they seemed, you knew the activities that went on behind the closed doors of the club. You were simply her old lady; you had a role to play. It was a lifestyle you grew to hate the more you knew about it. 
So, you waited for Yelena to ride off with the others to the bigger clubhouse in Ohio before you packed your belongings and closing the door of what once was your shared home, not a single word to tell Yelena where you were going or why you were leaving, not even a note. That was seven months ago. Seven months ago, you left everything you knew behind, seven months ago since you spoke a single word to anybody you cared about, seven months ago since you left your heart behind. 
You didn't make a name for yourself in your new hometown, you got a job at the local café; adopted a cat from the shelter and kept to yourself the best you could, isolating yourself from everybody around you. Only spoke when spoken too, only smiled when smiled too, only waved if waved too. It was hard to see any form of light at the end of the tunnel, you thought surely by now that Yelena would be worried or anybody for that matter, but you had to remind yourself why you left in the first place. 
Seeing everybody around you look so happy and letting your mind run towards thoughts of how things might be if you weren't there anymore, you were convinced the happiness of those you loved and cared about wouldn't change and maybe that was where the idea to leave first came to mind. 
Eventually you knew that you'd have to give Yelena answers for your decision. Every day you thought about the day you'd see her again, sometimes even thought about sending her a letter but would she even bother reading it? You weren't sure how she was feeling or if she even cared that you had left. That day came one Wednesday afternoon, shortly after you had finished dinner you heard the loud roaring sound of a Harley Davidson rolling up the dirt road of your driveaway. Your heart sunk to your stomach when you stepped onto your front porch and watched the blonde park her bike and remove her helmet. 
"You've done well for yourself" she said as she walked up the four stairs of your front porch with a hint of pain in her voice. You took a deep breath as she came closer, the smell of her perfume mixed with gasoline and cigarettes took you back to the last time you saw her. Just looking into her eyes, you knew she was hiding the hurt you caused. 
"How'd you find me?" You asked, your arms crossed over your stomach. 
"It wasn't easy, but I had Darcy run your old credit card details, found you purchased a place here before you cancelled the card" she replied with a slight frown in her brows. "So, are you going to let me in?" She asked. You nodded and moved aside to allow her to enter your home first. 
She took her time walking down the short hall to the opened living era, she noticed how the walls remained plain, not a single photo frame in sight. The silence was awkward, you were sure what to say but you knew by her body language that Yelena had a lot she wanted to say and all you could thing of was offering her a beer. 
"Do you want a beer?" You asked, watching as she pulled a chair out from the dining table and making herself at home. She only nodded in reply and waited for you to crack open a cold beer for her. 
"Why are you scared?" She asked before sipping her drink, "you're the one who left me without as much as a note!" She added, letting her anger fill her words. 
"I couldn't leave you a note, you know that" you replied without thinking it through. 
"What's that's supposed to mean?" Yelena frowned. 
"Oh, come on, do you really think if I left the more traditional way that you would've let me?" 
"Don't give me that shit, nobody was holding a gun to your head!" Yelena snapped; her eyes full of build up rage from her unanswered questions. Sure, she's raised her voice at you before whenever the two of you had gotten into an argument, but this felt different. 
"Yelena, don't turn this back on me! I left for my own good! I needed too, it was what was best for me" you shot back, remembering the reasons you left. 
"What was best for you? Y/n, you never even spoke to me about any of this! I never knew you wanted to leave! How the fuck did you think I felt huh?" Yelena's eyes searched yours for questions she was yet to ask but she couldn't see past her anger to see the real issue. 
"How long did it even take you to realise I was gone?" You asked her bluntly causing her to sit back in her seat, the room filling with silence once again. "It's been seven months Yelena, so tell me!" You added. The silence answering one of your own questions. 
"I tho-thought you went to visit your grandparents for a while" the biker eventually replied, "I wasn't sure when you left, fuck, I was gone for two weeks on that trip! But when your number was disconnected, I knew you left me" she added before leaning slightly forward, "what happened to us? Why did you leave?" she asked. Her tone was calm, but the pain was still there and for a moment, you lost yourself in her eyes like you always did. 
"Because you left me long before I left" you admitted with tears filling your eyes. "You used to come home to me Yelena, you used to call me to tell me you were okay but then you just stopped. The club became more important, you started risking your life for stupid reasons and the parties? You didn't even look twice at me anymore. That club is your family, and I became your old lady, the one who did your dirty laundry and made you dinner incase you'd come home" you added, letting the stream of tears roll down your face. 
Naturally, Yelena reached for your hands, wishing she had seen the signs before it was too late. "Detka" she spoke softly, the pet name bringing you a sense of comfort like it always did, "why didn't you say something?" She asked. 
"It wouldn't have made a difference Lena, you forgot about me, just like everybody else did. For months I blamed myself, maybe I wasn't good enough, maybe if I involved myself into the club more or maybe if I was more like the other women that things would've been different. I was scared to leave, I know what you and the others do, I know it's not legal…I was scared that if I left you would've made sure I never left again" your words opened Yelena's mind to her behavior, and she hated herself for putting you through this. "I had to leave" you added.
Yelena shook her head in disbelief at the words that left your lips, "are you really telling me that you were scared of me?" she asked, her tone stern to hide the hurt that your feelings had on her. You hated to admit it but you nodded, "can you blame me? You've changed Lena. Ever since Nat stepped back from the club and gave you more responsibilities, you've become distance, cold and yeah, I'm scared" you paused, letting your eyes drop, "I don't know what else to tell you" you added.
After taking a mouthful of her beer and swallowing harshly, Yelena rose from her chair, "Well, I guess that's all I need to know" she replied with another shake of her head before making her way to the front door. You frowned slightly at her actions before following her, "That's it?" you asked, stopping her from taking another step. Yelena stopped and turned slightly to look at you over her shoulder, not enough to make eye contact. 
"There isn't anything to say, you're scared of me and you left without wanting to even leave me a clue to as why. You did this for yourself, you made this new life for yourself. I'm not going to convince you to come back to me, not when you've just admitted that you're scared of me" she paused and turned fully to face you, "I would never, ever put a hand on you or put in any form of danger" she added, a tear rolling down her cheek. 
Maybe you were wrong to leave, maybe you stupidly let your overthinking thoughts get the better of you. You hated to see Yelena look so defeated but for some reason you weren't sure why, you couldn't say a single word in reply. You just watched as she walked out the door and down the stairs before turning to look back at you once more, "I'm sorry you felt that way. I hope you whatever you do, you enjoy it and are happy" she spoke before walking towards her motorcycle. 
You broke, tears filled your eyes as you heard her start up her motorbike one last time, revving it a few times before she took off down the driveway, hearing the distance roaring of her bike leaving you behind just like she did seven months ago.
A part of you left with her that day, a part of you that you wished stayed but you knew that your heart would always belong to Yelena, together or not.
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straycatj · 1 year
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hi Mr J, I know you are a tiny kitty so I'm not sure if you know where Cleveland is, but I'm your fan and I live realllyyyy far away! Just want you to know that we love little kitties like you in Ohio too <3
Thanks from the city of rock!
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official-darkforest · 6 months
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in your anthro au, does bramble actually make it to canada? is the plotline of the lake territory scrapped for something else?
rambled quite a bit here!
no, they dont make it to canada. they abandoned that idea after feather was killed. instead her funeral and burial is held in california by her dying wish and her family drives/flies over. graystripe and mosspelt took feather's car, but mosspelt flies back home via plane. graystripe is staying wirh storm indefinitely and eventually meets millie.
with storm's blessing, bramble,tawny, crow, and squirrel take the van back home. tawny is dropped off on the way, but crow insists on tagging along to thunder because he's not ready to be alone yet. his family is pretty small and he's not sure his parents will be able to help much, as much as they may try.
dodging the draft can get you into trouble, but there are many that got off scot free and bramble was one pf those lucky fellows (especially with firestar's involvement. he made sure bramble wouldn't have it held against him in return for keeping squirrel safe and bringing her home). firestar was furious at both bramble and squirrel but he's not cruel and unsympathetic, especially considering they just lost a very close friend (and that gray isnt coming back for a while).
this is where crow and leaf meet, crow is kinda bunking with bramble at his place and even had plans to move in for good. his parents were pretty combative but couldnt do much since he was a few states away!!! they dont know where the fuck thunder-whatever is. but eventually he gets a call about his father's rapidly declining health and immediately abandons his plans to stay. he asks leaf to come with him but leaf still isn't finished with med school (she doesn't know she's pregnant yet) and they part ways. crow makes it home to help ashfoot care for deadfoot in his final few months and fills in after his father dies. it's something he didnt plan to continue but its notnlike he HATES doing the work. eventually meets+marries nightcloud a 1-4 yrs later
leaf meanwhile continues med school. being unmarried with kids is still a social taboo, especially at such a young age (im imagining she and squirrel are around 18-19 by now, 17 during the road trip). squirrel and bramble, however, had been in a relationship with one another for a while after coming back home. sure, it got a bit messy when ashfur came back from vietnam and got a bit too close to squirrel for comfort, but they sorta resolved it and eventually bramble/squirrel got engaged. leaf confided in squirrel for her help with the pregnancy and squirrel immediately offered to take the children in as her own if leaf needed. it was a huge jump but leaf took the offer. bramble was let in on the plan the closer leaf got to her due date. he thought it was a very impulsive decision and they fought a bit about making the decision without him but he was enthusiastic about being a father regardless.
the others in town had their suspicions but dont ask dont tell.
theres some other parts i havent fully ironed out yet like where hawkfrost and mothwint come in.
as for the actual lake territories, they coexist with the forest territories by just being in different states LOL windclan and thunderclan's territory was pretty consistent in terms of The Basics so theyre mostly in the same general area (tc is east coast forests, wc is southwest-midwest prairies. theres a lot of cowboys, farmers, and ranchers in "windclan" as a result). shadowclan i can see being in the southern swamps, especially florida or louisiana, and riverclan is kinda interspersed alont the mississippi and ohio rivers. maybe a few along the east coast, too, as the lake territory equivalent. skyclan is probably in the rockies or the redwood forests out west. maybeeee old skyclan is in the appalachias???? idk LOL since the cats are so far apaer now the conflicts are a little less wide scale and more personal if rhat makes any sense at all. of course this whole au is a huge work in progress so some of what i say here may change!
the clans are rural/small/poor towns in my head. tight knit communities that have to rely on each other. kittypets are urban/suburbanites as a contrast and keep the 'kittypets r fucjing spoiled' theme going . you inow the city slicker junk LOL
bloodclan is probably a gang in new york. at least scourge's bloodclan. the other iterations are probably in other huge metropolitan cities. idk what warriorclan is, and the tribe is a whole can of worms im trying to be very careful with so im not gonna talk about them as a whole quite yet other than imply they exist
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letsgetrowdy43 · 1 year
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what about adam begging hughes!sister to come with him to wherever (hopefully anaheim) but she’s skeptical bc she doesn’t want to be a burden but he assures her that he wants nothing more than for her to be with him:)
You’re gonna go far—
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Au Masterlist!!
Adam and Sunny had tearfully parted ways after the draft, she was heading back to Michigan to resume her summer vacation with her brothers and family friends while he and his father flew out to Columbus for their development camp.
"I'm gonna miss you" she mumbled into his chest, tears staining his cotton shirt as she hugged him tightly, for the last time in a while. He placed a kiss on the crown of her head, "it'll only be for a few weeks and then I’ll be there, with Luca, for the rest of the summer" She shook her head as she stood on her tiptoes to kiss him on the lips, “still too long.”
A smile now worked its way onto her lips as she buried her face in the crook of his neck, “you and Gavo can’t have too much fun without me” “Won't be half the fun without you” he mumbled as he placed a kiss on the side of her head, his eyes looking up to see Ellen and Julia crying as they whispered to each other about the young couple.
Sunny pulled away first, "I'm gonna kiss you one more time then I'm gonna go and check-in, cause if I stay any longer Mom is gonna have to pry me off of you" She smiled, his thumb wiped the remainder of tears from her cheek as she cupped his face in her hands. His forehead bumped into hers, "love you" he whispered as he kissed her gently for the last time in a while. "I love you so much," she whispered as she pulled away from him.
ꕥꕥꕥ
Two days later Sunny was finally back in the warmth of her brother's summer house, feeling slightly down as she returned to her life without Adam. With her nose in a book to pass the time, Quinn walked into the room with a soft smile, sitting down next to her as she marked her page and cuddled into his side.
"I think it's over for us," she whispered as Quinn opened his mouth to ask her what was bothering her, "I think he's gonna do great things in Ohio and I'm gonna be a burden back in Michigan," Quinn closed his mouth and hugged her tightly. "I think that you mean a lot to him, and yeah you two are on different paths now, but I think that in the near future, you two will be exactly right where you were meant to be”
The girl smiled softly as her brother hugged her tightly, “when did you get so insightful?” “It comes with old age” he joked, placing a kiss on the top of her head before stealing the remote from beside her.
ꕥꕥꕥ
Her phone buzzed as a voicemail from Adam popped up on her screen, and her brows furrowed as she realized just how zoned out of reality she was.
“Hey sun, I just wanted to call and tell you that I’ve talked with everyone here and I think I’m gonna start my rookie year in September,” she can hear the excitement mixed with sadness in his voice as he lets out a deep breath, “I know it’s not what I planned, but they really want me here, and I think I’m ready” He paused for a second as he thought of his next words, “Call me back when you get this message, I love you”
Her heart dropped to her stomach as he ended the message, immediately dialling his number to call him. Her emotions were running high as the phone began to ring in her ears, “hello?” stopped her pacing around her room the moment he spoke.
“I'm so proud of you,” she spits out as soon as she hears his voice. “So it’s okay with you?” He asks genuinely as he stops pacing around his room and takes a seat on his hotel bed. “More than okay, you worked so hard for all of it”
A moment of silence hit them both.
“What does this mean for us?” She asked quietly, her eyes beginning to water as she heard nothing but silence on the other end. It was the million-dollar question, they both wanted to know where they now sat. She felt secure enough in her love for Adam that she would do long distance for the next three years, but was Adam on that level?
“I don’t want to hold you back, so if you want to call it quits now I understand, I just want what’s best for you” she whispered, begging for some sort of response. “I don’t want us to end sunny,” his brows furrowed as he laid back on his bed, hands massaging his temples as he fought off the stress headache that he’d been harbouring all day, “I want you, I want this.” Sunny nodded even though he couldn’t see her, “if you’d have me, I’d want you here for all of it.”
“In Columbus?” “In Columbus." he paused to let that sink in for a second, really contemplating if he wanted to add this new pressure onto her shoulders, "I know it’s a lot to ask of you, but maybe after UMich you’d consider moving here with me?” his voice laced with nerves, “you don’t have to say yes now, but just think about it for me.” “Wherever you want me, I’ll be there” she whispered as his face broke out into a grin.
He ran a hand through his hair, “So if I asked you to fly out here to be a witness while I sign my ELC you’ll be here?” Her face warmed as, “in a heartbeat” She bit her lip to hold back her smile as she opened her laptop to find flights for the morning
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This took me literally three days to write cause I've been so busy, but here.
This is also slightly fueled by the song "You're Gonna Go Far" by Noah Kahan, cause a friend recently told me that this song reminds them of me and now it's the only song I can listen to :)
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