#Ohhh I’m so excited lol

[eternal-moss]

SHE IS REAL YAAAAYYY

[akkivee]

🎶you think you’re mad too unstable, kicking in chairs and knocking down tables in a restaurant in a west end town 🎶

lol our new oridivi!!!! meet hachiouji division: west end mafia!!!!!!

[radiation]

I liked about half of Tunic. very pretty and had great level design, but the fighting mechanics were not consistent enough for the level of precision it demanded of the player. exploration was incredibly well done but the combat TO ME was something I just suffered through to enjoy the rest of the game. and then when I got to the boss rush I just uninstalled it. the combat felt so bad to play that when it felt like the developer was saying "here, you love this right? great news, you get way more of My Awesome Combat System" it felt insulting.

i think a lot of it is banking on Zelda nostalgia, but I've never played a Zelda game and I was coming at it through the lens of "this is an isometric soulslike" instead of "this is a challenging zelda-like" which made me have a bad time. i also did not think the gameplay meshed with the plot very much, for a game that was touted as "just like outer wilds."

also to be fair, I didn't engage with any of the meta-puzzles, because to me there weren't enough lore tidbits or hints of things lurking beneath the surface to make it seem worthwhile. it was just for the completionists or language nerds (laudatory).

.

[navysealt4t]

ough. am awake hello gamers

[poppyseed799]

I have this problem that’s like the opposite of nostalgia or something where some things I remember liking a lot as a child I look back and only remember the bad times.

This is specifically about Animal Crossing, loved that game as a kid, but I have literally no idea why, cuz it was just pure hell for me from what I can remember.

[sorrowfulrosebud]

Thinking about the progression of Katsuki letting you pet his hair (he’s also deaf in this bc I said so). Also season 6 spoilers lol

The first time you do it is during the designated movie night Class 1-A had every month during the weekend. Soft fleeces, pillows and sleeping bags litter the common room floor as everyone nestled in to start the movies. It was sacred tradition; a huge marathon of previously voted movies streamed one after another until everyone was asleep, or if the marathon ends early.

(Aizawa couldn’t be bothered to lecture the class anymore; as long as caramel popcorn didn’t get stuck in the rugs of the common room, you could all stay up for a solid week for all he cared).

You and the Bakusquad were lucky to snag one of the bigger couches, comfortable sitting you, Mina, Kirishima and Sero. Denki whined and pouted at first, before grinning at the realisation that he would be sat between your legs.

You and Mina both rolled your eyes, knowing that for all Denki was a hormonal teenage boy, he was harmless. Kirishima had even convinced Bakugou to join you somehow (under the promise that he wouldn’t bother him again).

“Tch, ain’t no way in hell you’re sittin’ there, sparky. Move your ass ya fuckin’ pervert,” he demanded, pulling Denki out of his euphoria. Denki whined, mumbling about how it was so unfair.

Katsuki rolled his eyes, before setting himself down. He would way rather have sat on the actual couch itself, but his head was pounding from training today and he could not be bothered to argue. You shimmied slightly closer to the arm of the couch so he would have more head room, which didn’t go unnoticed.

The lights in the room dimmed, snacks were distributed and drinks were poured. The dramatic sting of the opening credits filled the room as you and Mina giggled in excitement.

Katsuki’s head was absolutely killing him. The shitty combination of his classmates twittering, stupid jokes and shitty jumpscares made the pain in his head borderline unbearable. He was just about to get up and go when he felt a hand softly nestle into his fluffy locks.

Out of instinct, his warm palms wrapped tightly around the perpetrator’s, earning him a squeak. His head snapped in the general direction, only to be met with your widened eyes.

“Sorry Bakugou. There was a spider in your hair,” you whispered in his ear, showing him the tiny arachnid that was creeping along your hand. Katsuki rolled his eyes and released your hand.

“Whatever, just don’t touch me again, you weirdo,” he grumbled. He rested his head against the space between your and Mina’s legs and continued to watch the movie.

The next movie day was quite similar. You all arranged yourselves in a similar way, with you and Mina sat on the couch and Bakugou nestled between the two of you.

His head was absolutely pounding after training, but he owed Kirishima and he’d rather die than be indebted to him. The movie played as he rested his head on the plush couch, closing his eyes and sighing deeply. His hearing aids had been a total pain in his ass, and hearing was just too much for him.

He took them out, snapping them away in his case as he squints at the screen and lip-reads. You took notice immediately, gently tapping his shoulder and signing to him if he was okay. He blinked at you before huffing.

Yeah, I’m fine. Head hurts is all, and having a hearing break, he signed. You let out a silent “ohhh”. You thought for a minute before signing again.

I can give you a head massage if you like? My quirk allows me to heal through touching.

Katsuki’s eyes shot open before grunting and looking away. You took that as a no, before he nudged your shoulder.

Discretely. Do not let ANYONE see or I’ll kill you, he signed aggressively. You smiled as you started at the base of his scalp, your quirk heating up ever so slightly as you gently twirled his baby hairs.

Katsuki let out a slow breath as his migraine started to lift, and if he focused for a second; the ringing in his ears started to quiet. Your hands worked magic into his scalp, softly scrunching the dandelion fluff. Shivers ran down his spine as you thumbed the sensitive skin near his ears.

It took 20 minutes for him to feel completely rejuvenated, taking your hand off his head with a blushy grunt.

Thanks, or whatever, he signed, looking away. You gave him a small smile, ruffling his hair as he swatted you.

No problem, blasty.

“Where the fuck is he?! TELL ME WHERE HE IS, RIGHT NOW!” You demanded, the poor doctor hiding behind their clipboard as she waits for you to calm down.

“He’s right in here, but please be careful with him. He’s stable, but any… intense… emotions can throw that right out of whack,” she said calmly, opening the door and closing it behind you.

Katsuki was laid in bed, propped up by pillows as an oxygen mask aided his laboured breathing. His beautiful face was scratched to hell and back, and his upper torso was covered in bloodied bandages.

You let out a stifled sob, hands covering your mouth upon seeing your classmate. The two of you had grown closer during the movie nights; your hands would end up tangled in his hair as he slumped against you sleepily, slow but hot breaths against your leg.

You would kill Shigaraki for doing this, if it was the last thing you would do. Your head rested against the bed rails as you cried, not knowing if your crush would ever wake up.

“H-handsy? Wh’ the mphuck happened?” Katsuki murmured out. Red eyes cracked open slightly as he focused on you, before they shot open completely.

“Deku!” He exclaimed, trying to rip the oxygen mask off and trying to race to his feet. You exclaimed loudly, trying to get him to calm down. You ended up sitting on him, pressing his shoulders back into the bed as you looked at each other wildly.

“Y-you’re alive…” you let out a slow sob as you lowered your head. Katsuki stared at you, before his calloused hands caressed your cheeks. Your eyes shot open, hot tears streaming down your cheeks.

It was like he was seeing you clearly for the first time in ages, all worries slowly melting away as your hands bunched into his scrubs. You let go of his clothes as you started to shakily sign.

Shigaraki impaled you after you pushed Deku away. He’s totally fine, a bit roughed up but he’s being treated in another room. Your organs were pierced, and you’re gonna be sore for a while but you’ll get better soon, you sign. Katsuki nodded, still tracing your cheeks.

He let go of you as he signed back.

Are you okay? Did Shigaraki get you? You were there with us, and I blacked out before I could find you.

You shook your head.

No, I’m fine. I had a concussion and a busted leg, but Recovery Girl fixed me up almost right away. Does your head hurt? How do you feel?

Katsuki thought for a second.

My head hurts a little, and my gut hurts like fuck. Shigaraki fucking ripped my hearing aid out too so my ears are ringing.

You paused as you looked at him. You got off him quickly, signing to him that you were going to find a nurse, stopping when you felt him grasp your wrist.

Can you interpret for me? I’m a bit out of it and my head hurts too much for me to lip-read, he signed, looking… worried?

You smiled to him and nodded, promising that you wouldn’t leave him.

Nurses came and went as you signed to him what they were saying, as well as explaining how they were going to monitor him. He, of course, demanded you tell them that he’s fine to go home. You shook your head, smiling slightly as you tell them that he isn’t the biggest fan of hospitals, making him flip the bird at you.

The doctors gave him some antibiotics as he laid grumpily in bed, waiting for them to kick in. They left, reminding you of visiting times and when you would have to leave. You thanked them on behalf of you both, bowing before looking back to your crush.

He was sat pouting, tugging on the wires and tubes gently. Since he was more lucid, his usual moody temperament was back. You sat on the foot of the bed, tugging the blanket to get his attention.

Are you tired? I can leave you alone if you want. I know the others are probably going to demand to see you soon too, so you might want to rest up, you signed. Katsuki tutted, before a thought crossed his mind.

No, I’m not tired. Those extras can wait too. My head hurts still, so get over here and use your quirk, he signed aggressively, a stark contrast to the pink creeping up on his cheeks.

Oh, I’ll call the nurse- you start signing before Katsuki lets out an aggravated grunt.

No, dumbass. My HEAD HURTS, come USE YOUR QUIRK, he made his hand movements larger to emphasise. You stop, letting out an ohhhhh.

A cheeky grin swamped your face as your cheeks warmed. Katsuki huffed and looked away, calloused fingers playing with the hospital sheets. You shyly made your way next to him, him shifting away to give you room.

Are you comfortable? You sign. Katsuki nods, wrapping his arm gingerly around your waist. Your arms snaked around his shoulders, pushing his head into your neck. Gentle hands pulled debris out of his fluffy locks, content in hearing Katsuki’s relieved huffs of breath.

“…ne.”

“Did… did you say something, Bakugou?” You turn to look at him. His cheeks were splashed a delicate rosy pink.

“Be mine, damnit!” His voice was gruff with disuse as he peers into your eyes. Your own orbs couldn’t help the leaks, reaching down and pressing your lips to his.

The next movie night rolled around, Katsuki was proud to show you off as his partner. PDA was a tricky concept for him, after almost being scared off when his parents found you both asleep and cuddled tightly together well after visiting hours.

He had no qualms shouting praises to you during training, or threatening the life of creepy guys who can’t stop staring. So his favourite time where he can absorb your love in public lies in the tradition of movie nights.

Katsuki had his hearing aids out again, simply opting to sit in silence. He was sat between your legs, head resting against your tummy as he was occasionally shifted by your quiet laughs. He paid no mind though; so calm and quiet that he was ready to fall asleep.

Then your magic hands came out. You knew all of his sweet spots; the delicate scarring near the tips of his ears, the wispy baby hairs near the bottom of his neck, and the sensitive spot in the crown of his scalp always sent a shiver down his spine. He reminded you of a kitten, and when he lets out the occasional sigh, you imagine he’s purring instead.

With the soft kisses pressed against your thighs, just the two of you together and your hand in his hair,

he’s never felt more loved.

[girlboypersonthingy]

Hiiii I wanted to request hazbin boys x injured male reader? Reader gets into a scuffle, gets roughed up quite a bit and comes home not looking too well (I wanna see em fuss over the reader lol)

Mmph, yes yes, I love boys fussing over their injured darling. Too fuckin cute! I have so many great requests for Hazbin and Helluva, I’m so excited 🫨 thanks for the request and enjoy anon 💟

Notes: gn!reader bc anyone can get into a scuffle so why not, mostly fluff with a sprinkle of angst

TW: blood, bruises, fighting, cussing, of course it’s suggestive during Angel’s part 😉

Includes Lucifer, Angel Dust, Husk, Sir Pentious, Vox and Alastor

Hazbin boys x reader- Bruises 🖤

You’re not sure who roughed you up, you barely got a look at the dudes before you were laid out on the dirty sidewalk getting punched and trying to push one of the perpetrators off you. Whoever he was, he was strong and brutal and must’ve really had a problem with you because damn, you were fucked up. Not that you couldn’t hold your own, but there was more than one of them and they really caught you off guard. You had suffered several blows to the face and a few kicks to the stomach and back. Seemed like the group showed just a bit of mercy tho- they could’ve broken your legs or straight up killed you. Luckily, you limped away with only minor injuries but a huge blow to your psyche. While it could’ve been worse, it was horrific and traumatizing regardless.

It’s hard trying to stay tough and take care of yourself because you’re scared, feeling like you’ll have to look over your shoulder from now on when you’re out on the streets. It was also a bit embarrassing considering Husk and Angel offered to tag along with you to keep you safe but your dumb ass insisted you were fine alone.

It was late now, around the time everyone went to bed at the hotel so you were expecting to silently creep inside, hobble to your room and take care of yourself in secret. And if anyone asked about the marks or bruises the next day, you’d just blame it on a wild night of partying. To your surprise, as you walk in the door the entirety of the hotel’s staff and residents were sitting on the floor and couches in the front room, drinking and talking by the fireplace. Of course, Charlie had everyone doing some bonding bullshit late at night. The sound of the door clicking open has everyone’s eyes looking towards you now. “Ah, shit…” Leaves your swollen lips as the crowd gasps and one by one, they all stand and approach your damaged figure. Finally, the one person you really didn’t want to see you like this comes rushing forward to get a good look at you.

Lucifer 🍎

“Oh, Satan! (Y/N), are you okay? What happened? Ohhh, my poor angel!”

Proceeds to fuss and worry over you while wearing the saddest expression :,( his poor bb

Might actually cry a little…just hurts him to see his darling all banged up.

It’s not just the physical pain he senses, it’s the emotional pain you feel too- the fear and the trauma and the stress of it all

His hands just hover all around the most damaged parts of you- fingers almost touching your eye which was now swollen shut, his thumb ghosting over your busted bottom lip

Whisks you away to his room and runs you a bath. Gets you all clean and is probably still whining and crying over you as he watches the bath water turn red with all the blood washing off you and gets you ready for bed.

He’s an emotional man, okay?

He also feels extremely guilty for not being there to protect you. Even if you bluntly told him you don’t need his protection, he feels like it’s still his fault at least a little bit.

Miiiiiiight start a silly little argument over you never leaving the hotel or his side ever again lol

“I just want to protect you, my love. Please! Stop being stubborn.”

He’ll really really baby you tho.

Like even if your legs are working fine, NOPE! Don’t move an inch. Luci will carry you anywhere you desire.

“Lucifer, I just have a black eye and some scrapes. I can walk just fine, babe.”

And he’ll just ignore you and continue to coddle you and do everything for you

For sure this man peppers very gentle, very soft and slow kisses on your tender face once you’re cleaned up and finally resting in his bed

And he for sure cries again in the morning when he wakes up and your face looks even worse

Probably even panics a bit like-

“IM TAKING YOU TO A HOSPITAL OH MY SATAN!!! MY POOR BABY WWAAAA!”

“It’s just some bruises! Luci, they always look worse before they look better, I’m fine.”

Just calm him down with some kisses and words of love

Angel Dust 🕸️

“Holy shit! What happened, babe? Oh no…this is bad. This is sooo bad! This is why we wanted to go with ya.”

Also gets very dramatic and concerned, looks so sad over your battle wounds

But of course he’s a flirt even under tough circumstances and can make a dirty joke even in the most dire situations

He’d definitely tell you you look hot asf and that you’re soooo brave~

Tries to lighten the mood a bit

“(Y/N), I wanna be the only one who gets to rough you up.” *pouts but also winks at you*

Angel has had his fair share of beatings courtesy of Valentino so he’s very good at first aid and knows tons of tricks to help with bruising, cuts, scrapes, preventing scars, relieving the pain.

He’s great at the clean up part but even better at the comfort part

Brings out all six arms to wrap you up in while you lay in his bed, cuddling up to you while offering soft kisses to the parts of you that aren’t so sore.

Angel is always down to fuck so if you’re feeling up to it, he’ll offer you some great sexual healing while being oh so careful of all your wounds and all the painful spots.

Will let you take control too, he hopes it’ll make you feel better and maybe return some of the confidence you lost from this scuffle.

He can spot a bruised ego from a mile away and he’ll do anything to get you feeling happy and secure again.

Also argues with you about never letting you go anywhere alone ever again lol he just loves you too much. If you’re gonna get jumped, he’s either gonna be there to help you out of it or he’s gonna be taking half the beating right next to you.

Reminds me of a song…

“I wanna walk with you, wherever you go to. I wanna hurt with you. Whatever you go through, I do too.” -sour switchblade by Elita

Yeah that’s Angel, just wants to be beside you no matter the circumstances

Husk 🃏

“Oh, you dummy! This is why we wanted to go with you. Oh, doll face. Who did this? You alright?”

Yeah, he’s mean sometimes so he’s gonna scold you for going out alone before the comforting starts.

Ultimately, he doesn’t pull you away to get you cleaned up or anything. Lets you decide what to do next, where to go. He just follows you and keeps a hand on you somewhere to let you know he’s here for you.

Will whip up any drink you ask for in hopes of it relieving the pain a bit

But he’s sneaky, he’s gonna ask you tons of questions about what happened, who did it, where you were, how many of them there was. Won’t give you your drink until you answer him.

Husk is plottin and schemin, wanting to get back at the assholes who did this to you. Hes thinking about all the cool, little weapons he has and what he can do with them to teach those jerks a lesson.

In the end tho, he does get more sentimental and soft spoken later while cuddled up to you in bed.

He’ll purr softly in your ear while letting his hands gently roam your body, tracing comforting circles all over your bruised skin

Will def wrap you up in his silky wings and then proceed to pour out his entire heart to you.

“I love you. I’m so glad you’re okay. You need to listen to me. I know better than you, I’ve been down here a long time. You have to be more careful. I dunno what I’d do if I lost ya, doll. You gotta stick with me, I’ll always protect ya.”

Once you fall asleep, he wanders out to the lobby to find Angel at the bar and there they talk about teaming up to get revenge on the assholes who dared to touch Husk’s little babe

The next morning, of course they’re still talking about it. You’ll have to tell these idiots to stop and just let it go bc omg they sound crazy rn they’re gonna make a mess if you let this continue

Buuuut if you kinda like them fussing over you this much, then by all means let them do their thing as you sit back and enjoy the attention

Ooooh, Husky is getting maadddd. Kinda cute when he lets a protective growl slip out while talking to Angel. Aww he loves you~

Sir Pentious 🐍

Immediate tears and full blown panic attack at the sight of your battered face.

“OH MY GOODNESSSSSS!!! My baby! My darling! Ohhhhhh, you poor thing, come here! I’ll take care of you.”

Doesn’t care that the entirety of the hotel residents are crowded around watching you two- Pentious holds you like a baby in his arms and carefully sinks to the ground with you, holding you so tight it actually kinda hurts due to all your bruises.

Cries for a while like this- goes back and forth between examining your bruises and cuts and bloody nose with his watery eyes to then burying his face in your neck as he weeps for you.

“Pen, I’m okay. Just a little banged up. Nothing I can’t handle.”

“I CAN’T HANDLE IT!!! You’re too pretty to be beaten up like thisssss. Aawwwww.” And he’s crying even harder now.

And this goes on for a while until you finally decide to get up and go to your room with him to get cleaned up.

Babies the absolute fuck out of you- brings you food in bed and tries to feed it to you, gets you in the bath and refuses to let you touch anything while insisting he do all the work for you, carries you everywhere.

It’s actually so nice tho- he washes your hair for you real slow and firm as he scrubs your scalp, very carefully washes the dirt and dry blood from your skin only to reveal more bruises he hadn’t seen before, carefully applies ointment to your bloody cuts and scrapes

Listen…this man is not gonna stop crying until you are 100% healed up. Even the next morning, you wake up beside him to see his face wet with tears as he sniffles.

At least you know he really truly deeply cares for you and loves you 💚

“Oh, it’s okay, babe. I’m felling so much better today, especially since I get to start my morning in bed with you.”

And now he decides he’s gonna keep you in bed all day and continue to baby and pamper you

Keeps his tail and most of his body wrapped around you loosely all day as you watch movies and relax. Cant stop staring at your face and focusing on each blue and black bruise you wear, eyeing every cut and scrape and the split skin on your lip.

You took a beating and he thinks it’s only fair that you and him stay in bed until you’re truly feeling well enough to resume your normal daily tasks.

Of course, he has to stay with you in case you need something! Can’t leave his injured partner alone, wouldn’t dream of it!

Vox 🖥️

(I know he’s not at the hotel, pretend you just walked into V Tower instead, k?)

REVENGE REVENGE REVENGE

“WHAT. THE. FUCK?! Who? Where? When? HOW FUCKING HOW DARE THEY-“

You’ll have to cut him off or he’ll go on an entire raging tangent about revenge and eventually short circuit lol

“Voxy, I’m okay. Don’t worry about it. I just wanna get clean and go to bed.”

He slowly cools off and begins to focus more on you and your injuries, asking if you’re okay or if there’s anything he can do. Now behind closed doors, his entire attitude changes.

He’s following you into every room, watching you with an expression of intense sadness and concern, wishing he could take all your pain and give it to himself instead. He’d suffer for you if it meant seeing you happy and healthy

Sits in the bathroom in silence but keeps you company while you wash up. He might ask if you need help but also wants to give you space and make sure you feel safe

Assists you in getting dressed while making it very romantic and being very attentive. Vox will so slowly slip your pajamas onto you while letting his claws ghost over all your bruises.

Will lean in and kiss your busted lips right as your head pops through the top of your shirt, followed by a smile and probably more kisses

Listen, most of these boys are gonna become way more over protective after this incident okay? Vox is most definitely not an exception

Insists that either He’s gonna be with you every where you go from now on or he’s gonna send security with you every where you go from now on.

And no matter who is with you when you’re out in the streets, his cameras will also be watching over you.

Oh yeah, and he goes back in the cam footage and has a perfect view of the whole incident. He watches it over a few times before ordering a hit on every sinner who dared to mess with his lover.

You’ll never have to worry or look over your shoulder or worry again 😘

Alastor 🩸

Doesn’t say much or even stay long to worry about you at first.

He’s more angry and bent on revenge than anything. He’s worried about you too but he knows you’re strong and can take care of yourself.

He slips off to do some exploring and investigating to find out who did this to you

Spends maybe an hour figuring it out and then promptly goes on a murder spree to take care of all those pesky sinners who dared to lay a finger on his beloved

Okay, now that that’s out of his system, he can come back and take care of you.

Isn’t as cuddly and romantic as the others but he still babies you and refuses to let you do anything for yourself.

“Now now, darling. Just relax. I’ll have you cleaned up and feeling better in no time.”

Bathes you, dresses you, tucks you into bed all while humming slow tunes to you

Doesn’t cuddle you but sits on the bed beside you and gives your head some gentle pets

“You won’t have to worry any longer, my dove. I took care of those degenerates and I’ll never let you wander the streets of hell alone ever again.”

Will place a gentle kiss on your throbbing head before leaving you to rest.

He’s serious tho, anywhere you go he goes too. You’re never leaving his sight again ❤️‍🩹

[myysaints]

hi i hope you’re doing okay! i wanted to know if it’s possible to request something with carlos where he had this crush on y/n who’s a famous actress or singer and is a complete mess when he gets to meet her at a grand prix

thanks if you do it and ps i love your work!!

°˖ ⊹ ꒰ CS55 ꒱ MORE THAN JUST A CRUSH ─ CARLOS SAINZ

CARLOS SAINZ x f!singer!reader

⌗︙・ summary — your first appearance at the miami grand prix turns heads – catching the eye of one particularly enthusiastic driver in red.

genre — fluff, socmed au, fc: sabrina carpenter

notes — hi anon!! i am doing okay thank u for asking 🌷 and thank you for the ADORABLEEEEEE request!!! love the idea of carlos being this cool suave guy and just utterly melting lol. thank you for your kind words of support <3 hope i did your request justice! (also thinking of making a pt 2 hehe)

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yourusername

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yourusername    miami i am in u ❤️🤰

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user    literally a goddess

user    we need the album !!!!!!!

user    LMFAOOO the caption she is so unserious i love it

user    mother getting a good rest after a SMASHING world tour, deserved ✨

user    y/n going straight to miami after finishing her asia world tour is so random lol 😭😭

user1    i heard she’s going to the f1 race this weekend, maybe that’s why shes there user2    ohhh, makes sense ig. is she even a fan though? user3    dunno, but a ferrari driver liked her pic so good enough i guess 🤣

revealmoi

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revealmoi    UPDATE: The people anon are referring to are NOT Taylor Swift and Fernando Alonso. Lol.

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user    The way Deux had to say that the blind isn’t about TSwift and Alonso LOL

user    “Fast Times” – Y/N L/N’s newest single. “Blonde songstress” – Definitely L/N. “Spicy individual” – ?

user1    the chili emoji was so random lol user2    has to be carlos sainz, smooth operator and chili are both his nicknames user3    hmmm but anon would have specified if the spicy indiv was a driver right? i feel like that’s pretty big info to leave out

user    not carlos liking the post HELLO?????

user    no way this is about carlos and y/n, he doesn’t even follow her 😭

user4    he likes almost all her posts though user5    lmfao liking posts but not following, that’s even shadier imo 💀💀

user    idk man i’m just glad that my girl y/n is finally getting the appreciation she deserves 👑

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2023 C² Challenge | Music Challenge with Charles Leclerc and Carlos Sainz

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You knew attending a Formula 1 Grand Prix would be hectic – after all, you had just ended the Asian leg of your world tour, and Miami was always swarming with press – but you did not expect just how chaotic things would get.

“It’s great being here!” You flashed a bright smile to Martin Brundle, who was currently following you around the pitlane as apart of Sky Sports’s coverage. “Obviously, I’m here to support Ferrari, who have so kindly invited me this weekend, but I’m just really excited to feel the energy and watch the race.”

Martin nods, a sly smile creeping onto his face. “I just have to ask, out of pure curiosity, of course: Is it true that Carlos Sainz personally invited you to attend this weekend’s race?”

You laugh, casting a nervous look to your publicist, who shakes her head with a stern look. You turn back to Martin and the camera, an apologetic look on your face as you recite the statement your agency has prepared for you. “I really don’t know much, it was Ferrari’s PR team who reached out to me, after all. So, whatever the rumours say, just know I’m as clueless as you are!”

That gets a laugh out of Martin, at the very least, and you think that he’s about to leave you alone. However, unfortunately for you, you’ve just reached the Ferrari garage, and are greeted by the sight of none other than Carlos Sainz himself standing at the entrance, chatting with his engineer.

Your publicist almost immediately motions for you to step aside, but Martin is one step ahead of her as he grabs your arm, tugging you along with him as he makes a beeline towards the Spaniard.

“You know what – Why don’t we ask the man himself?” he grins deviously, steadfastly making his way into the Ferrari garage.

You stutter out weak protests, casting doubtful looks to your publicist. But she merely sighs, pinching the bridge of her nose, gesturing for you to go ahead with Martin. You shrug, following Martin into the Ferrari garage. Not that you have much of a choice – the presenter seems unshakeable as he heads towards Carlos, who has his back turned, blissfully unaware of the chaos approaching him.

“Carlos! Carlito! My man!”

The Ferrari driver grins, whipping around as Martin claps a hand on his back. “Martin! What brings you to the gara-”

As his gaze shifts from Martin to you, his voice trails off. Time seems to slow – A red heat spreads across his face, and he ducks his head down in a fit of sudden coughs. You stand by Martin’s side with a small smile, extending your hand to offer him a water bottle.

“You okay?” you ask with a teasing smile.

Carlos nods furiously, a large hand reaching out to take the water bottle from you. His fingertips brush yours as he does so, and butterflies erupt in your stomach. He blushes harder at the brief moment of contact, turning his face away from you as he gulps down the water, still spluttering.

Amidst a few weak coughs, he grits out, “Choked on my spit,” before clearing his throat, raising his head to flash you a shy smile.

Martin sends you a knowing smirk, chuckling lowly. “Come on, what happened to being the ‘Smooth Operator’, huh?”

You roll your eyes playfully, returning Carlos’s meek smile with a bright grin. “Oh, lay off him, Martin.”

Turning to Carlos now, you extend your hand with what you hope is your friendliest smile, “Nice to meet you, Carlos! I’m Y/N.”

“I know,” he blurts out, all too quickly. His cheeks flush red, and he clears his throat awkwardly. “I mean, yeah, I know... ‘Cause, well, I like your music. It’s really good.”

Martin cuts in, microphone in hand, “So, Carlos, word ‘round here is that you were the one who campaigned for Y/N to be invited. Is that true?”

Carlos rubs the back of his neck sheepishly, suddenly averting his eyes and avoiding your gaze as he smiles shyly. “I don’t know who told you that… I’ll need to have a chat with the team about adding more privacy clauses in their contracts next time.”

You giggle, and that makes his head snap towards you. “Nothing, nothing, ignore me. That was just hilarious.”

“Ignore you?!” Martin exclaims, practically shoving you towards the Ferrari driver, whose eyes have now almost doubled in size. “Oh, come on, you youngsters. Get to know each other! This isn’t the 1920s, you don’t need an old geezer like me to chaperone you all the time. Get chattin’!”

You send Carlos a teasing smile, to which he shyly returns.

“Well, Carlos,” you bump his hip playfully, “How ‘bout a tour of the garage?”

He nods, leaping up and offering you his hand, ever the gentleman. “Of course, it’d be my pleasure.”

↻ www.twitter.com

↻ ww.instagram.com

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yourusername

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yourusername    newintown.jpg (#forzaferrari)

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carlossainz55    That camera looks familiar…🤨

yourusername    drop the .jpg account then we’ll talk user    LOL shes so real for that

user    the forza ferrari hashtag ajdfgshdf shes a true tifosi to the core

yourusername    always! ❤️🌶

landonorris    Ayo where’d that ring come from carlossainz55?

This comment has been deleted.

landonorris    Nice meeting you Y/N!

landonorris    Friendship bracelets (and rings) are always welcome ❤️ carlossainz55    Blocking you. yourusername    reporting you. landonorris    😭😭😭 WHAT’D I DOOOOOOOO

user    NEW JPG ACCOUNT INCOMING???????

user    the way carlos literally manifested this LMFAO

Liked by carlossainz55

user    excuse me ms l/n but WHO is that on the third slide !!!!!!

user1    carlos sainz user2    NO WAY…. user3    and another one bites the dust…

user    carlos never beating the simp allegations i fear

user    “To new friends”…. i remember…..

user    i smell a new wag in townnnnnnn !

yourusername    just friends, don’t make it weird please 🤍 user4    LOLLL GIRL YOU TELL EM

user    i know carlos was crying after seeing y/n’s just friends comment lmfao

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[marleyybluu]

Piercings

Spooky x f!reader

Word count: 925

Warnings: Spooky being a cute daddy, talks of piercings, brief description of a child's ear being pierced, tears from both baby and dad (lol), fluff, Spooky gets a lil freaky at the end. (had to), allusions to smut. reader is not race-coded, reader speaks/understands Spanish

(not my gif. hes so fucking hot.)

“Spooky, baby, come on she’s six months. It’s easier to do it now, they say the pain won’t last as long.” You pouted at your husband. You’d been talking about piercings and earrings since you found out you were having a girl. Spooky hated it. Said you could just give her your moms old ass clip-ons and call it a day but you were not about to do your daughter like that. Plus you maaay have jumped the gun and bought lots of studs and little hoops for her.

Your husband scowled at you as he held the child in question in one hand and pushed the stroller with the other. “Pleeeease.” You begged. He huffed and rolled his eyes. “Fine,” He complied. “But I’m gonna be so pissed at you if something bad happens.” You rolled your eyes, you were sure she’d be fine. “She won’t even cry.”

“Have you seen her get a needle at the doctors? Yes she will.” He argued. But it was too late he already said yes and so you led them over to Claire’s. You browsed around until the piercer was done with her current client. Spooky smiled as his daughter’s tiny hands reached for the bow he was holding. “You already have too many bebita…. But what’s one more? Right?”

Spoiled.

While they were distracted you conversed with the piercer who assured you that the pain would be quick, she’d cry for a few seconds but she’d be completely fine after. “Yeah, try and tell my husband that. He might fight us both.” You joked. She laughed and shrugged. “All the dads are like that,” She leaned in to whisper. “Sometimes they cry more than the kids.”

Oh, you’d pay to see that.

“Just let me finish sanitizing every thing and I’ll get to you guys.”

“Alright, thanks.”

You wandered to find your little family, your daughter snug as a bug in her fathers big arms. You poked her side and she squirmed flashing you a toothless smile. “Are you ready, mi amor? We’re gonna make you look extra pretty.”

Spooky groaned. “Say Mommy I’ll always be pretty and that this idea is estúpido.” You flicked him on the back of his bald head."

"Stop teaching my child bad words."

He mocked you and flipped you off, you grabbed his finger, about to twist it off if you could but the piercer had called you guys over. You firmly planted your hand on his back and pushed him to the chair, he sat and glared at you. "Okay, so you'll sit her on your lap, one arm over her torso... like this..." She arranged his arm for him, "And hand... here." His large hand engulfing your child's head, she turned her small head to you and smiled again. "Are you ready?" You asked in your baby voice which always got her excited.

The piercer picked up her piercing gun, you cringed starting to remember what that felt like when you got your nose pierced so long ago. She gently picked up the small lobe of your daughter's ear and let it hang between the end of the earring that was jammed inside the white gun and the hole it would come through. You heard one quick click and your baby's smile turned into a frown, her tiny lip quivered and she blinked out a few tears. Her calm before the storm. Her head was turned away from you and the same thing happened, a fast click, and soon a wailing baby.

Your heart sank, maybe it was a bad idea. Your eyes met Spooky's, in them held sorrow for his baby and disdain towards you-- they were glossy and slowly reddening from his own incoming tears, he rested her head in his chest and bounced her up and down with a comforting pat on her back.

"Ohhh, mi bonita flor, I'm sorry. We're not talking to mommy anymore." He cooed kissing the top of her head. Your jaw dropped. "Oh, come oooon, Spooky."

No response. Just a look that could kill. You half-smiled. "I love you. Thank you."

He sucked his teeth and walked out of the store with your bawling baby.

-- --

The silent treatment continued when you got home, even after your daughter calmed down and forgot the whole ordeal. You held her in your arms as she slept peacefully, milk drunk as usual. Her ruby earrings sparkled as they complimented her skin tone and face shape, you smiled drawing faint circles on her arm. You felt those warm brown eyes boring into the back of your skull.

"Still mad?" You mumbled turning toward him. "Yes." He huffed. You nodded your head at your baby. "Look how fucking cute she is. Just say I was right."

Spooky leaned over to get a better look at her, her small nose twitching in her sleep. He swooned resting his hand on her little leg. "Qué bonito. Ella es hermosa." (How cute. She is beautiful.)

"Exactly." You looked down at her. "Always knew we'd make some cute ass babies."

He delivered a soft kiss to your neck, his teeth nibbling at your skin and you could feel his smile against it. "Speaking of," He kissed the back of your ear. "When we gon' start trying for another."

You gasped as he pinched your thigh with his free hand. "Oscar Diaz!"

"I got my own milf walking around, you think I can control myself?" You playfully rolled and carefully eased off the couch so as not to wake your baby. "Let me put her in her crib."

"Yes!"

something quick cus i'm high asf and I've been seeing a lot of men crying when their daughters get their ears pierced and idk I just imagined spooky lmao couldn't think of a title but if yall come up with one and i like it I'll use it

if you liked this fic feel free to like this fic, comments and reblogs are appreciated.

Peace and love see you in the next one✌🏾

🏷: @darqchilddaydreamz @realhotgurlshit @skyesthebomb

[thiccschief]

Coach's Big Secret, Pt. 2

Part two of (three, probably?)

As usual this will be longer than I expected lol. Part three coming soon!

Contains rapid male weight gain, sexual themes, bloating. Slight inflation themes, but mostly weight gain.

Part one is here.

“Ohhh shit!” You let out a moan as you feel the cream flow faster through the nozzle and into you. You can feel the pressure in your belly increase as it fills with the fattening cream. Simultaneously, you watch with both fear and arousal as your body rapidly transforms. You’re getting fatter much faster now! “I’ve gotta be at least… 250 at this point.” You say as your hands explore your rapidly softening body.

“Hm… let’s find out! I fitted the middle of the room with a high-capacity scale beneath the floor.” Coach replies as he walks over to the wall and turns on a display. In large, red numbers “254. Shit big guy, your body is absorbing the cream nice and fast.” Coach grins and walks behind you, and gently helps you squeeze out of your now incredibly tight shirt. “You won’t be fitting into this again…” He says in a low, gruff tone.

Coach then positions himself directly behind you and reaches his strong arms around your belly, and begins to gently rub it. “You’re doing great, big guy. Just keep breathing and let it happen. I can’t wait to see what my special recipe does to you…” He whispers in that low, dominant tone, making you shiver. While one hand rubs your swelling gut, his other makes its way down to your throbbing manhood, and gently gives it a couple strokes. “And I can tell that you’re just as excited as me, big boy.”

“Fuck sir…” you manage to say. This is all so arousing, it was almost paralyzing. All you can think is that you need more. To be bigger. To let Coach have his way with you.

He gives your belly a firm slap before walking around to admire you from the front. “Shit, you’re really filling out! I mean look at these…” He gives your fattening tits a good jiggle, grazing your nipples. You let out a moan, your nipples have never felt so sensitive before! It has to be something to do with the cream, or growing bigger. Coach grins as you mischievously “you like that, fat boy? If you think those tits are sensitive now, just you wait…”

You look up at the screen. 268. You’re really piling it on now. As you look in the mirror, you notice your love handles are really becoming prominent. Additionally, your ass is now significantly larger than it was even ten minutes ago. And most surprisingly, your dick is starting to get buried beneath an encroaching fat pad. “Shit sir… how big are you going to make me?”

“Hmm. I’m not sure yet. I think…” Coach pauses for a moment, seemingly deep in thought. “I think we’ll know it when we see it. But I’m thinking big. I want to show you off to the other boys on the team, and shock them with how much of a lardass you’ve become.”

Your face growing red with embarrassment at the thought of facing the team like this, you're also incredibly turned on at the thought. “Shit yeah. Make me your fucking prize hog.” You reply. As hot as it is, it still feels surreal talking to your coach like this. It’s almost like a dream.

277. “Hmm… definitely in chubby territory now, but still way too small…” Coach says as he gives your belly a hard slap. “I think you can take a little more, don’t you think?”

“Yes sir” you reply, eagerly waiting to see what Coach has in store. You watch as he picks up the remote again, and presses a button. You instantly hear the pump in the tank increase its speed and feel the cream rush into you faster, inducing a moan to escape your mouth.

“There we go, big guy. So I will admit, I haven’t done much testing with this speed or beyond, so it may fill you faster than your body can absorb the cream. This might cause some… side effects. Just relax and you’ll be fine.” Coach says, encouragingly.

“I can take it, give it to me, sir!” You reply, eager to please Coach. You see him grin in response.

Back to his low, gruff tone, “Yeah? What a greedy hog. I love watching you swell up like this, it’s so fucking hot.” Coach then undoes his belt and drops his khakis, revealing his massive bulge in his boxers. Noticing your gaze, he grabs his bulge with one hand and gives it a shake. “I know you want this too, big boy. Maybe when we’re done I can top you off…” Coach gives you another sly grin as he returns his attention to your swelling form.

289. You look down and realize you can see nothing except your bloated, growing belly and tits. As you look in the mirror you can see your thighs are now much bigger, paired with your swelling ass.

297. As the cream continues to rush into your ass, the pressure in your belly is building slowly, as if your body cannot absorb it fast enough. Is this what Coach was talking about? It keeps swelling bigger and bigger, giving you a nice, round ballgut. “Coach?” you ask, “I’m getting pretty… bloated.”

“Ah, yeah that can happen. Just relax. Your belly should hold the excess cream until it can be absorbed to make you bigger. Just enjoy the feeling of fullness. It’s part of the fun” he replies, calmly. “You’re doing great, big guy.”

323. As you continue to get fatter and fatter, the pressure inside your belly is getting more and more intense as well. “Fuck… Coach… It’s getting really tight…” You say, your breathing heavy as you rub your swollen belly.

Coach pauses the machine and walks up behind you, reaching his arms around your belly. He begins gently rubbing your belly in circular motions and leans his head to the side, his lips near your ear. “You’re doing great so far, champ” he whispers in a low tone. “Just relax and let it happen. Just submit to the cream.”

As Coach rubs your belly, helping the calories absorb into your body, your belly rumbles softly. “Shit that feels good, sir…” You say, your head back and eyes shut in relief. You feel your belly rumble again and suddenly *buuUrrRp* “Sorry Coach…” You say, meekly.

“Making room for more, big guy?” Coach says with a chuckle. “Just let it all out, bud. Relax and let it all happen.” He slowly pulls away and gives your belly a pat. “Alright. Ready? I think you should be good to take some more.”

“Yes sir. Make me bigger!”

Part three is here.

[hanafubukki]

I honestly hope Skully isn't an antagonist because we've only had him for literally 2 days and I love him so much. Its like I forgot how wonderful it is to be treated genuinely nicely because Yuu is sorrounded by assholes all the time. I wanna wrap him in a blanket, take him back to Ramshackle, and have a Tim Burton movie marathon with the rest of the Halloweed antagonist redemption squad (of course Malleus can come, too). I love him so much and I just want him to be happy and I am sorely tempted to make a new OC just to be a companion for him.

I mean look at him! He's a funky little skeleton twink whose special interset is Jack Skellington! How can anyone possibly dislike him when he's the Gomez of twst?

Hello Lex 💙💚🌺

Ohhh I get exactly what you mean Lex. 😔 The things Yuu goes through is terrible. So having Skully treat them so “gentlemanly” (their words, though Leona says otherwise lol) is really felt by Yuu and all of us.

I haven’t really heard of anyone disliking him. I’ve seen everyone love him…and that is exactly why I think he’ll become the villain 🥲☺️

Because the ones we don’t always see coming? Are the ones who treat you with kindness. The ones that made you relax (well, not the nrc boys lol), and the one that you can feel for/relate to.

That’s the villain that usually shocks us.

I would love to see them change from their formulaic introducing the “evil character” and getting surprised by the actual villain for this event. (Maybe oogie boogie), but with the way Skully is acting right now? The hints? The fact that what he says doesn’t add up?

I have a feeling it will be him. Maybe in cahoots with another villain. 🤔

But what if…Skully is oogie boogie in disguise? Or the three trio kids?? What then?

It’s still early in the event to tell what may happen. I’m excited to see how the event unfolds and most of all, I’m excited for the ending.

Malleus and Leona could tell something was off with the book, so I wonder, will they remember 🧐

I can’t wait to see it play out 🥳

You should definitely make that OC for him 💞💞 we all needs friends in life, why not be his? 💞🩵

[harrysfolklore]

hiii, could you do a part 2 to taylor giaviasis blurb??? she just had a baby girl and it would be top tier dadrry content 🥹

here it is ! some dad!harry for the soul 🥹 i hope you like it

CHECK OUT PART ONE | MY PATREON

ask me anything | masterlist | likes and reblogs are appreciated !

liked by harrystyles, annetwist and 605,736 others

yourinstagram Our family is getting bigger 😭🎉Baby #2 is on the way ! Can’t believe bubs is going to be a big brother 🥺

view all 43,973 comments

harryfan1 OMG HARRY WILL BE A DAD AGAIN

jefezoff I love this family so much ♥️

gemmastyles I can’t believe I’m going to be an auntie again I’m losing my mind

harrystyles Thank you for making me a daddy again, there’s no one else in this world I would want this with x

harryfan2 OMFGG I HOPE THEY HAVE A BABY GIRL

harryfan3 harry is going to have his second child i feel so old right now

liked by selenagomez, yourinstagram and 9,836,625 others

harrystyles Three become four x

view all 278,726 comments

harryfan1 CONGRATULATIONS HARRY

taylorswift Congratulations 💖 Much love to your beautiful family, I can’t wait to start knitting blankets for the little squish on the way 🥲

↳ harryfan2 TAYLOR ????

↳ taylorfan1 “cold was the steel of my axe to grind for the boys who broke my heart, now i send their babies presents” 🥹

adele ♥️

harryfan3 OKAY BUT HARRY STYLES FATHER OF TWO ???? HELL YES

billieeilish Where do i sign up to be part of this family??😩

liked by jefezoff, yourinstagram and 135,866 others

zanelowe A very special conversation with @harrystyles on paternity, music and balancing personal life and the spotlight. Coming this Monday at 10am pt. @applemusic

[LINK TO THE BLURB ABOUT THE INTERVIEW]

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harryfan1 OHHH

harryfan2 i can’t wait to listen to this

harryfan3 i know zane wouldn’t fail us

harryfan4 YEEES

YN’S INSTAGRAM STORIES

//

liked by harryfan1, harryfan2 and 2,836 others

dilfrrystyles WE MET HARRY TODAY !! we asked him how was yn doing and his reply was "she's amazing, getting more gorgeous by the second" and he also said that they might know what they're having soon and he's excited MY HEART I CANT BELIEVE THIS HAPPENED

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harryfan1 OMFG CONGRATS

harryfan2 AHH I LOVE FATHER HARRY

harryfan3 knowing him, he won't tell us what they're having

harryfan4 i still can't belive he's going to have another child

liked by harrystyles, lizzobeeating and 607,836 others

yourinstagram Put your favorite baby girl names down below 🌸

view all 43,983 comments

harryfan1 OH MY GOOOOD

annetwist I love my little girl already ❤️

harryfan2 HARRY STYLES GIRL DAD OMFG

harrystyles She’s not allowed to have boyfriends already

↳ harryfan3 he’s going to be one of those annoying dads lol

jefezoff Jeffrina

↳ harryfan1 WHAT THE HELL 😭😭😭

↳ yourinstagram GTFO

liked by niallhoran, yourinstagram and 8,736,903 others

harrystyles It’s coming to an end, and it’s almost time to meet our baby girl. As you reach the final stage of your pregnancy, I can’t help but be in awe of you. You’re the best mom to our bubba and you’ll be the best mom to our little girl. Thank you for putting up with the changes in your body, the hormones and pain. I love you, and I admire you.

view all 248,635 comments

harryfan1 HAAAARRRYYYY

lukehemmings 🥺🥺🥺💓

gemmastyles I love you both so much

harryfan2 if my husband doesn’t love me like this i’m divorcing

yourinstagram I’m a very, very pregnant woman about to pop and this doesn’t help with the hormones at all, i love you 🥲

harryfan3 THE BABY MUST BE COMING REALLY SOOOON

liked by harryfan1, harryfan2 and 28,937 others

celebrityleaks Harry Styles photographed outside a hospital today in London. It’s most likely that his daughter was born this weekend

view all 9,736 comments

harryfan1 FUCK PAPS

harryfan2 come on be respectful give them some privacy

harryfan3 harry is officially a father of two ???

harryfan4 this is not the way news should’ve come out ://

liked by harrystyles, pillowpersonpp and 897,637 others

yourinstagram Two weeks ago after five hours of labor my baby girl entered the world. Birth is a wild yet magical thing. Thank you to my doctors, midwife, family and friends for all that you did for me. And most importantly, thank you to my life partner for making this child with me, for physically holding me up while i brought her to the world and for being the best father to grace this earth.

view all 51,826 comments

harryfan1 OHHHH MY GOD

pillowpersonpp 🥺🥺🥺💓

harryfan2 HARRY IS A FATHER OF TWO

harrystyles There’s no one I would rather have as a life partner. Thank you for being the mother of my children. You’re the love of my life

↳ harryfan3 HARRYYYYY STOP

gemmastyles Bubba is going to be the best big brother ever 🥺🥺 my babies ❤️

liked by arianagrande, yourinstagram and 8,903,826 others

harrystyles My daughter has been part of our world for two weeks. Bubba is in love with his little sister and he’s willing to do anything for her and that’s such a sight to see. I feel like the luckiest man on the planet because this is my family. Thank you to everyone who has sent out love and joyous wishes, my family feels your love every day.

view all 203,836 comments

harryfan1 HARRY ILYSM

selenagomez Much love to your beautiful family ✨

harryfan2 i can’t believe he has two kids now

yourinstagram Thank you for giving me the family of my dreams, hubby

↳ harryfan3 STOP IT RIGHT NOW

lukehemmings 💖💖💖

taglist: @cucciolafaerie @eleanordaisy @sunflowersndpeaches @golden-hoax @alienorknight @daydreamingofmatilda @ivyproblems @ayeshathestyles s @stylesmygucci @gimsaysay @rosaliedepp @dontworrysunflower @milfrrynation @manifestrry @iceebabies @harrystylesrecs @pleasingrryyy y @harianaswhore @noitsmebecky @abeanontoast t @grapejuice-rry @vrittivsanghavi @msolbesg @tati813 @sad1esgf @itsgabbysblog @theekyliepage @watermelonsugacry @be-with-me-so-happily @a-strange-familiar @reveriehs @musicforcinemas @harrybabyyyyyyy @tinydeskwriter @noooovaaaaa @tenaciousperfectionunknown @mxltifxnd0m @rach2602 @balletdancerry @b-reads-things @juiceboxrry @lomlolivia @itsgigikay @goldensstateofgrace @missmielyhoran @fdl305 @lightsoutstyles

[thrashkink-coven]

Funny bullshit my deities have done that I think about constantly

Hermes using the word “cringe”

Hermes: you should say my name before you blow out my candle

Me: oh okay, why? Is it fucked up if I don’t?

Hermes: no it’s not a huge deal it’s just… cringe

me: CRINGE?! DID YOU JUST USE THE WORD CRINGE???

Lucifer frequently interrupting Lilith whenever she gives problematic advice

Lilith: You should curse that guy that keeps bothering you at work so that he gets fired and loses all his money lol

Lucifer: Please don’t pay attention to her right now.

Lord Cerberus getting super excited whenever we work with Hermes together

Me: I’m having trouble finding the right words for this spell I’m gonna call Hermes

Cerberus: THATS A GOOD IDEA!! ILL GO FETCH HIM!

Lord Ra asking for a little nibble of my food whenever I eat near his altar in the least subtle ways

Me: *eating a piece of pizza*

Ra: Ohhh woe is me… if only I had a little piece of pizza 🥺 if only a kind and funny devotee gave little old me a little pepperoni… 🥺🥺Doesn’t anyone ever wonder if Lord Ra likes pizza too? 🥺 No pressure. ☺️

Me: Aren’t you literally the king of the Gods

Inanna referring to herself with terms like “that bitch”

Me: Do you ever get sad that your worship has been abolished so many times?

Inanna: I honestly do not give a fuck 😊 I still come back every time because I’m that bitch and I always have been 😘

Me: Period

Lord Hermes making sure I get permission from Lucifer before working with him and/or other spirits.

Me: Okay I’m ready to start working now

Hermes: Did you ask Lucifer for permission before you invited Azazel and I into your space?

Me: Yes, I always ask dad for permission before I go play outside.

Hermes: Very good.

Lord Cerberus not at all being above the fluffy dog thing

Me: I know you’re a primordial death God with an incredibly important role but do you still like tummy scratches?

Cerberus: … perhaps… is this a hypothetical question… or are you going to do it…?

Me: can I?

Cerberus, already on his back: Do what you must.

Bonus: Lucifer not liking Eminem but being very fond of Hozier

Me, meditating at his altar and listening to music when “without me” starts playing

Lucifer: 😕

Me: what’s wrong? Your vibe just shifted

Lucifer: oh it’s nothing

*Song ends and Hozier’s “In The Woods Somewhere” starts playing

Lucifer: 🙂

Me: IT WAS THE SONG

[ghostssweetgirl]

Drunk fem reader x Ghost

((I’m very drunk so excuse the spelling errors lol))

Drunk reader got a little too drunk (lightweight drunk fuck) ghost is literally dating them and is forced to take em home where their a little needy, thoughts?

(I'll probs forget I requested this in morning 🫣👀🤣) LOL

Heya, sorry this took so long! But yeah, I can do that for you! :) Hopefully where I went with it is okay with you!

Drunk Fem Reader x Simon 'Ghost' Riley

cw: alcohol intake, lightweight drunk lol, flirting/some slight sexual tension, needy reader, est relationship

It's been a long night of drinking with your boyfriend's teammates. At first you laughed at them for trying to outdrink each other, but you got a big head as you subconsciously joined, thinking you could keep up. You couldn't. They were drinking the finest whiskey of this hole-in-the-wall bar, whooping and hollering in celebration of their latest successful mission.

You were sat next to Simon, resting your head on his shoulder. You had a lot of pent up energy at first, excited to see your man after such a long time, happy to spend some time with his best mates. But drink after drink, drink after drink, and drink after drink, you were losing that energy, that composure.

"Y'alright, luv?" Simon whispered in your ear.

You nodded with closed eyes. Keeping them open was killing you, the bright lights, the reflection off the tables, the party chatter becoming too much as the room was spinning.

"Wan' another shot?" he asked, as he was about to pour you another drink he paused, chuckling. "No, you're fuckin' pissed, doll."

"N-no, I'm good," you lied. You didn't want to take away his fun just because you were a lightweight. "One more shot, baby, please."

"Oh, no," he pushed the drink away. "No more for you, we're takin' you home, luv."

You whined when he said no, but he helped you stand up with his arm around you. He nodded to his men as he bid his goodbyes, helping you as you stumbled out of the bar to his truck.

--

You must have passed out for the ride home, because you slowly lifted your head awake in your driveway, Simon walking around to help you out of the vehicle.

"Come on," he grunted, lifting you bridal style into your apartment. "Lightweight princess."

"Simon..." you played. You fumbled in your pockets for your key, not finding it. You almost freak out until you hear him unlocking the door. Ohhh, he has a key.

He carried you to your bed, which you splayed across comfortably, sighing from relief as you suddenly needed to take off your pants, leaving yourself in your shirt and panties. He walked out, quickly returning with a cold cloth and a cup of water. You lulled your head towards his direction with your half-lidded eyes until your vision finally focused.

"Hey handsome," you flirted.

"Don't start that, ya little minx," he teased as he sat down, holding the water out to you. His hand rubs small circles on your hip. Your drunken, needy brain fixated on the sensation, fire rising up your spine as you giggled. He held the water out further to you as you finally took it.

"You're so beautiful," he complimented, looking at you with an entertained gaze. "Even when you're drunk."

Your cheeks flushed red. He wiped your face with the cold cloth in attempts to soothe you. Then, your stomach rumbled. Ooh. Suddenly you had a deep, deep craving for your favorite sweets you had stashed away in the kitchen.

"Simon?" by your tone of voice, he knew you wanted something.

"What is it, luv?"

"Will you go get my sweets, baby?" you pouted, looking at him with your best puppy-dog eyes.

He laughed as he got up with no hesitation. "Yes, luv."

He made his way to the door before you perked up again at another need.

"Ooh! And could you... get me more water?" you hold out your empty glass to him.

"Anything else, princess?"

"Crackers?"

He nodded, finally walking into the hallway.

"And my favorite blanket!" you hollered.

"Simon!"

"When you get back, can we cuddle?"

"Yes, dear," you heard his deep voice echo.

--

He returned with everything you asked for. Your sweets, some crackers, water, your favorite blanket. He then laid down behind you, wrapping the blanket around the both of you. You ate your snacks and hydrated yourself before turning around, snuggling into his chest. You tossed and you turned, but for some reason couldn't get quite comfortable.

You finally draped your leg across his as he almost cradled you in the new position. "Hm," you hummed as you felt his warm skin against your cheek.

He sighed a deep breath at his own comfort, reaching up to remove his mask.

"I'm so lucky," you bit your lip, leaning up to kiss him. You both softly moaned into the kiss as you instantly became putty underneath him, but you sighed as he hesitantly pulled away.

"Y'need some rest, babe," he rasped. "But fuck, 'm lucky, too."

--

[bitchinbarzal]

24. "There are flowers on the doorstep." "Who from?" "| think that you have a secret admirer."

And 62. "I'm your secret admirer." With Jeremy Swayman ❤️🙌🏻

The knock on your door got you stepping away from your work desk.

You opened the door to find a bouquet of flowers on the floor. Your neighbour, Mrs Stevenson was admiring them on her way out

“There are flowers on your doorstep!”

As if you couldn’t see them yourself

“Who from?” You asked aloud, looking around and she shrugged

“I think you have a secret admirer sweetheart” and left. You picked them up and checked for a card, no card.

You went the rest of the day trying to figure out who had sent them. You’d text Jeremy on his way back from Vancouver and told him

Got flowers!! have a secret admirer 👀

ohhh lucky girl! were they nice?

so nice! They look expensive! How was the roadie?

meh really excited to be home. land at 5:30

coming over? You can help me find my future husband lol

He didn’t reply after that, you assumed he was coming over anyway. He did, opening the door a little after 7 with bag in his hand, the heart pattern on it catching your eye.

“Whatcha got?”

He smiled, holding the bag out “I’m your secret admirer. Happy Valentine’s”

Your eyes are wide “It was you?!”

“Who else knows those are your favourite flowers?”

You stopped for a moment “you’re right… how didn’t I realise”

Jeremy places that bag down on your table before throwing himself onto your couch beside you “you’re not the brightest bulb in the box”

You feign an insulted look “So you bought me flowers and gifts for valentines… got something to ask me?”

He smirked, his fingers brushed over your jaw “Will you be my valentine, sweet girl?”

“I thought you’d never ask”

[johnslittlespoon]

thinking unholy thoughts of gale making john come untouched with only his fingers in the biker au… maybe john didn’t even know it was possible so when gale keeps going he gets confused and is like “i’m good im ready” but gale keeps going 😅

au post | ohhh man okay. yeah feeling super extremely sane and normal about this, never been better! thanks! ~2k words of nsfw filth below the cut sighhhh

okay, prefaced with a little more world building in my last post since we're really diving into this au now LOL. ofc things might change when i actually write it, but this is how i'm feeling things will go rn!

re: 'maybe john didn't even know it was possible'– like i said in the drabble before this, he's fooled around a little with curt, but nothing more than getting a bit handsy. he's had a girlfriend for around a year, so they were probably serious enough to get up to things too, but straight sex is very different from gay sex obviously.

the internet exists, and during the time john is pining(thirsting) over gale, he probably does his fair share of googling 'blond man with tattoos fucks brunet man', but really he's kinda intimidated by a lot of stuff, so he doesn't delve too deep into that world. when he and gale start seeing each other and john realizes they're gonna move past making out eventually (because gale is almost such a gentleman sometimes that john wants to bash his head in in his impatience), he probably psychs himself out a bit and gets into his own head and is like fuck.

gale's had years to gain experience and what if he's not good enough or does something stupid or or or, on and on. obviously these worries are completely unfounded because gale adores him and would never pressure him and doesn't expect them to just jump right into things; half of the reason he probably drags things out is because he wants to be absolutely certain things are on john's terms, and that john's not just being horny and impulsive.

john probably ends up trying to do some research so he can yk. pick up some tips, because he's got all the enthusiasm he needs when he thinks about getting to drop to his knees for gale, but he has no idea what he's doing and he doesn't realize everyone learns as they go because he's dumb (/fond) and overthinks everything. (whatever he ends up learning doesn't matter anyway, because all coherent thought leaves his head when they do start doing stuff together and gale is so encouraging and easygoing that he feels ridiculous for ever worrying.)

all that is to say that yeah, he's got like no firsthand experience when it comes to anything past the basics or anything he hasn't been doing by himself. everything is fresh and exciting and as much as he loves just hanging around gale, he's also always needy and horny (gets told he's "insatiable" quite a few times by gale) so they get up to a lot of shit and it's unfair how good gale is in bed and how he knows exactly which buttons to press to get john worked up.

at the time this incident happens, gale's already fingered john a few times, but it's always just as a build up/foreplay, usually followed or joined with gale's other hand or lips around john's cock. they haven't had sex yet, and it feels really nice when gale does this, but john always just kinda sees it as foreplay and it doesn't last for long.

so when gale's got john laid in his bed one sunny afternoon and they're making out and john starts getting whiny and squirmy from the stimulation of his fingers in him, and gale doesn't switch things up like he usually does, john's heart leaps because in his mind, surely gale's getting him ready for something else.

but he's frustrated because it feels like gale's purposefully avoiding hitting right where he needs him to, pants out gale's name against his lips, grasping the back of gale's shirt. starts rocking his hips down against his fingers, seeking it out, and gale rumbles out a "needy thing" before pressing a kiss to his cheek and crawling down the length of his body, settling himself between john's legs.

john props himself up on his elbows to watch, cheeks flushed and eyelids heavy, digging his fingers into the blanket instead. he lets out a little whine at the slow drag of gale's fingers, and that finally makes him cave, crooking his fingers just right, and john's lips part at the way the sudden surge of pleasure zings up his spine.

lets his elbows slide out from underneath himself, dropping back down into the pillow, satisfied he's finally getting what he's been waiting for since gale worked him open ten minutes ago. he waits for stimulation on his cock to join the fingers in him as usual, assuming that's why gale moved to lay there, but gale just keeps up the slow in and out and consistent brushes against his prostate and its embarrassing how much he's leaking all over his own stomach.

but then he has the thought that maybe gale's actually properly prepping him and his cock twitches and his breath catches and he props himself up again to find gale already watching him. he waits expectantly, too shy to ask, and gale doesn't offer him any confirmation, just pressing gentle kisses to his thighs and smiling when john's hips start to roll down against his fingers again.

john thinks that maybe gale's waiting for him to say he's ready, since he does often make him ask for what he wants, so even as his cheeks go hot, he gets out a breathy "gale, i'm– that's good, 'm ready."

but gale only chuckles quietly, nipping at his thigh to feel it twitch away, watching john in a way that makes him feel somehow even more exposed than he already is, and now he's even more confused and he feels like he's melting into the bed and gale's putting a little more pressure into each crook of his fingers and the sounds he's making are so whiny and high pitched that he wants to cover his own ears out of embarrassment.

"does it feel good, doll?" gale purrs, dragging john's eyes back to him, and he nods, twisting his hands in the blankets harder. it does feel good, enough so that heat is pooling in his stomach in a way that's both familiar and foreign, the sensation all different with no friction against his dick.

gale's working his hand a little faster and john's face burns at the realization that he's being finger–fucked like a girl and he drops back into the pillows, arms going too weak to hold himself up. his thighs are starting to tremble and gale murmurs that he's "making such a mess on yourself, baby, look at you" and john immediately reaches down to take his dick in his hand, but gale catches his wrist with his free hand, slowing his movements down, much to john's dismay.

"no hands today, john," he says gently, letting go of his wrist. "i want you to keep them at your side for me, can you do that?"

and john lets out a near hysterical noise but he obliges, grabbing fistfuls of the blanket again, head spinning at being given an instruction, biting down on the inside of his cheek when gale speeds his fingers up again with a "good job, baby."

the heat builds and builds as gale's fingers hit right where they need to each time, and it feels like he's just hanging on the edge of an orgasm for so long, unable to tip over that edge, eyes blurring over from how overwhelming the drawn out sweet–hot pleasure is. he's mindlessly rocking his hips down and panting out little "ah ah ah"s with each thrust of gale's fingers and he's so close to lifting his hand from his side when a sob of frustration slips out.

but gale presses his lips to his thigh again, sucking at the sensitive skin there, pulls back to murmur a stream of "c'mon sweet thing, come on my fingers, show me how good you feel, you can do it" and john chokes out a cry as he clenches around his fingers and comes so hard he nearly blacks out, back arching and hips stuttering up like he can get friction that way.

gale's hand chases his jerking movements, continuing to fuck him on his fingers as john paints his own stomach, cock pulsing, feeling like he's just going to keep coming and coming, mewling desperately and shaking like a leaf and seeing stars behind his closed eyelids.

he closes his thighs against gale's sides when it starts to be too much, hands shaking when reaches down to tiredly push at him, hips stuttering away from the stimulation, hiccupping as he tries to catch his breath. he can feel hot tears soaking into the hair at his temples, lips parted in surprise, shuddering when gale lets his movements slow down until his fingers go still.

john whines when he pulls them out, despite his efforts to squirm away from them moments before, and gale presses a kiss to his hip before he crawls back up his body, cupping john's face with the hand not covered in lube, and john's eyes flutter open, bleary when they focus in on the expression of awe on gale's face.

"fuck, john," gale sounds almost as breathless as him. "you're crying, baby. was that okay?" john nods shakily, tilting his chin up for a kiss, and gale leans down without missing a beat, kissing him so deep it feels like he wants to devour him. mumbles "you have no idea what you do to me" against john's lips, brushing his fingers over the tear streaks on either side of his face, peppering his red cheeks with light kisses before pulling back again.

"felt good?" he murmurs, and john chokes out a laugh at the understatement, draping his wrist over his forehead. "really good," he breathes out, flushing when he opens his mouth again, "didn't know that was, um. a thing." and gale half laughs, half groans at the admission, rolling his hips down, and john sucks in a sharp breath at the drag of his pants, cock twitching even after all that.

gale doesn't mind; he's more than happy to watch his pretty boy fall apart on his fingers, mouth, cock, as many times as john lets him.