#Oh shwell

[meringuejellyfish]

its always fun for me to see the pencil drafts/otherwise photos of comics in progress ... damn ... that is on a paper ...! you feel me. i get this way when im working on my own drawings. sometimes my drawings are on my walls. crazy crazy world we live in

[inconsideratekidney]

10/17/24

hey gamers,

i wanna be a gamer, i wanna be up in here gaming on a thursday afternoon, double-monitored up, hella snacks.

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yoohoo big summa blowout. it's fall and it's amazing. loving my sweater moments because i exist in sweater weather. it is a time for seasonal depression, but also for cute and bulky sweaters! my favorite accessory. I consider them accessories because they are very much a part of my outfit. i am my outfit. i am the main attraction. just kidding...the sweater is the main attraction, i'm not that egotistical...

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anyway....i don't have much to say to be honest. i have talked to people and had my fill of spill-ing out my brain. i am content with my state of mind right now (i have no big assignments due tonight or tomorrow night). i am stressed about next week with 2 midterms and more big work coming in.

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the adhd brain is such an interesting thing--how can one be so distracted and yet not be able to distract oneself when necessary? trauma is one thing, but intrusive thoughts are so dumb and stupid. why have a brain if it can't function well enough to do what you tell it to do?

figures, i have so much on my plate and so much death in mind. my uncle's, my friend from high schools--which makes me think of the students last year who died and all others, and liam payne from one direction???? like what???? that's crazy. i can't strip that down for him the same anymore. wtf. like i can't take death in general, but this one is so different. it's like when cameron boyce died. so young and so out of the blue. i was shocked when i heard the news and it's just so terrible. fucking TMZ, ofc they posted a partial picture of his body, like wtf. no composure/demeanor like my interpreting gang knows. just odd behavior.

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i am into watching House MD and honestly it's so interesting. my mom was on general hospital and dr. quinn medicine woman, which i'm sure no one knows about and probably one other show i can't remember, but i am into House right now. i like the dynamic, for now, and might get sick of it soon, though, cause i've been watching it a lot lately and might be overindulging. it's whatever. the show is witty and informative. i enjoy seeing the ways that the doctors develop their personalities and i wish there was a bit more drama relating to each of the doctors, but it's mainly about house and his group of doctors. oh shwell. maybe i am more into drama hospital shows than i thought. my youtube shorts feed sure thinks i am (and i keep liking them). i hate algorithms sometimes.

i have been instagram-free for a couple of years now! and tik tok free for some handful of months! but i am terribly addicted to youtube shorts.....

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rock, paper, scissors, says shoot! i picked scissors what did you pick

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give me good recommendations for a laptop. i will bother everyone about this. i want a good computer that runs windows. pretty pls. my computer is giving me such a headache and i hate it. just anything with windows and that is somewhat light and somewhat cheap pretty pls. :prayer hands:

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rawr. i am the evil tiger of the wicked west. i will be taking all of your cookies. mwhahahhhahhaahhaha. om nom nom. they're mine now and in my belly. mmmm mmmmm. yummy.

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i need a brain break. rahhh hiyaa.

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tips on how to go insane?

step one: exist

step two: do life

step three: repeat.

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td:lr?

um, not much folks.

not much this time

gamer

(sweat)er

talking and death

house md and addiction

lappytoppy

mushy brain

sanity

need a break, goodnight

kD :3

[hamptercatapult]

oh my fuck i amlost forgot i made chicken salad yesterday lets fucking go. wish i had some lettuce for a delicious sandwich but oh shwell

[pyroweasel]

Mermay, you say?

[egogrumps]

My life is going to be a never ending loop of my shitposts that I make at 4 am getting 200+ notes and the content I actually spend time editing or whatever getting 10 notes and I have accepted that

[kuzu-me]

i don’t feel it’s super obvious there that she’s ss4 but maybe that has more to do with the fact that everything in the picture is already red so it’s hard to differentiate her fluffy arms and legs from everything else

[cum-padre]

New icon because someone said some very sweet things about this pic

[throwupgirl]

Have You Seen Marie? by Sandra Cisneros, 2014

[rosenallies]

idk bestie i just think we deserve smut in that au with nali in a pretty skirt and lots of degradation and all that jazz 😌😌😌😌😌

Idk if this is a lot of degradation like u asked but <3 oh shwell

——

“Do I really have to go, Rosie? I wanna stay with you,” Denali whined, a sweet pout on his face as he stood in the middle of Rosé’s office after bringing him the laptop he mistakenly left at home.

He glanced up at the clock. “Baby, I’ll be a while.”

Denali stuck his lip out childishly, batting his eyelashes in the way he knew made Rosé weak.

“Nali, trust me, I don’t mind if you stay, I’m just warning you that you might be bored. I have lots of work to do.”

A smile lit up Denali’s face. “Thank you, Rosie!”

Rosé chuckled. “You’re welcome, sweetheart, now come here.”

Rosé sat at his desk and beckoned Denali over with a crook of his finger. He happily made his way to Rosé’s lap and straddled him, humming appreciatively as he nuzzled his face into Rosé’s neck.

“Tired, baby?

Denali rubbed at his eyes, careful not to mess up the mascara he meticulously applied earlier. “You kept me up too late last night, daddy.”

“Take a nap, sweetheart, I’ll be right here,” Rosé said, trying to hold in his chuckle

He yawned and nodded, resting his weary head on Rosé’s chest, listening to the steady sound of his heartbeat and the clicks of his fingers on the keyboard to lull him to sleep.

He stayed asleep for a while, Rosé every now and then peeking at his sleeping face, so relaxed and peaceful. It wasn’t until about an hour in, he started to squirm and whimper in his sleep, his skin growing warm to the touch. Rosé knew Denali like the back of his hand, knew that sexual dreams were an often occurance. And he knew exactly what it looked like when he had them. He started to squirm and whine, his cheeks going red and hot, his breathing getting heavier, yet more breathy. All that until the biggest telltale when he started growing hard, straining the fabric of whatever panties he put on for bed.

Rosé let him wiggle in his lap until he felt Denali’s hard-on press into his stomach, his skirt shifting slightly. He sucked a breath in, hands tight on Denali’s hips to steady himself, knowing his hips were one of Denali’s biggest erogenous zones, everytime Rosé squeezed him there, it got him all worked up and pliant. Now was no different, his pretty eyes fluttering open, already glossy as he looked at Rosé.

“Daddy,” he whined, shifting slightly so his dick was pressed firmly against Rosé.

“What, my pretty boy? Did you have a nice dream? Care to tell me what it was about?”

His cheeks flushed darker, shaking his head. “Not really.”

Rosé hummed. “No? Then I guess you won’t mind if we don’t take care of that problem underneath your skirt.”

To emphasize his words, Rosé reached under Denali’s skirt and stroked him over the lace of his panties, chuckling when Denali’s hips bucked slightly to meet the feeling of his hand.

“Rosie, please.”

“Oh darling,” Rosé cooed, “it’s so simple, all you have to do is tell me what it is you were dreaming of daddy doing to you. Be a good boy.”

Denali’s eyes flitted to his lap where his dick was now visible underneath his skirt. He looked back to Rosé, who watched him expectedly.

“Um, in my dream,” his voice was quiet and shy but Rosé encouraged him, touching the soft skin of his thighs gently, inching closer with every word, “it was like this. I-I was in your lap in the office and you let me ride you. All the people in the hallway could hear.”

Rosé nodded along, his own dick straining his pants as Denali explained himself. “Was that hot to you, baby? Do you like the idea of daddy treating you like the little slut you are? Fucking you in my office and making sure everyone knows the prettiest boy in the world is taken?”

Denali nodded shyly, his body feeling hot and heavy in Rosie’s hands. He looked up at Rosé through his lashes, batting his eyes innocently. “Please fuck me, daddy. Show everyone I’m yours.”

Letting his most primal instincts take over, Rosé easily lifted Denali onto his desk, the clink of his belt as he unbuckled it making Denali feel lightheaded. He pulled his pants around his thighs then sat back in his chair, ordering Denali to take his panties off underneath his skirt while he lubed up his cock, making sure Denali was still open enough from this morning’s early morning fun.

“Do you need any prep?”

Denali shook his head. “Just lube.”

Glad he kept some in his desk drawer, he added a little extra just as Denali positioned himself over Rosé, slowly lowering himself and taking the entire length of it easily. He gave himself a moment to readjust and get used to the stretch, but the bliss came soon after, his eyes rolling to the back of his head and his back arching deliciously. He moved slowly at first, teasing Rosé until the sweet feeling got too torturous and he picked up the pace.

Denali rode him until his hips were tired, movements sloppy as he got closer to the edge. Eventually, Rosé had enough and picked him up and placed him on the edge of the desk, laying him back not caring that he was knocking over books and cups filled with pens. He relentlessly pounded into Denali, groaning in his ear.

“Such a dirty boy. You just love it when daddy uses that pretty little body of yours.”

Denali only groaned in response, gripping onto the edge of the desk so hard if he could form a coherent thought, he would’ve been worried about breaking a nail.

“Oh can’t speak now? It’s okay, that’s how daddy likes his baby. Quiet and needy for cock. Is that what you are sweetheart? A foggy headed little slut?”

Whining, Denali nodded. “Only for you.”

“That’s it, good boy. Are you close? I’m so close.”

“Mmhm, yes, daddy. Just need-“ he whimpered, reaching for Rosé. Knowing Denali so well, he knew exactly what he needed and leaned own to kiss him, keeping his pace the same until Denali was moaning into his mouth as he came, Rosé following shortly after.

He stayed inside Denali, their lips still pressed nearly together while they caught their breath, only pulling out when Denali’s grip on him loosened as he was no longer fearful of falling off the desk.

“How are you doing, princess?” Rosé asked, pulling out a wipe to wipe Denali clean with.

“Want you to hold me, daddy.”

Rosé chuckled. “I know, baby, give me a second.”

He had only a moment to get everything situated before Denali was whining again, borderline tearful as he made grabby hands at Rosé, visibly relaxing when he was back in Rosé’s lap, his legs swung to one side and dangling off his lap.

Rosé kissed his temple, letting his lips linger. “Go back to sleep, angel, I’ll wake you when it’s time to go home.”

Denali didn’t have to be told twice as he let himself drift back off, comfortable and warm in his lover’s lap.

[softlilacmoonlight]

Satan x Reader - Drunk off of You

(Y/N) pov:

Flashbacks/Explanation/Prior Needed Info

I CAN'T BELIEVE HIM... UGH... THAT LITTLE SH--! I am fuming hot mad. My day didn't go from the typical zero to sixty. Nope. It went from 60 to 120! My day started off by being late for breakfast. Not that bad, right? WRONG! Beel left absolutely no food, so guess who's going to school on an empty stomach. Yay...

Once at school, I sat down in my chair right on the bell, but regardless it gets worse. Even though I made it to class before the teacher started lecturing, and still on the bell mind you, she still gave me a detention slip for being late! I wasn't even late! From there I found out that I failed a math test, and I entirely forgot about my biology test. To add to all of that, I have homework in all seven of my class periods. (Thank heavens demons have study hall TwT)

The cherry on the top occurred during lunch. I was sitting at the lunch table talking with the brothers when suddenly I get a call from my boyfriend. I've been dating him for about, oh, six years. I'm currently twenty-one. Anyway, I excused myself from the boys and went out into the hall to accept the call.

To sum it all up in one sentence, he dumped me. He dumped me because he was "insecure" about me being around the brothers and the rest of the men. I'll be the first to openly state that they are hot, but I would NEVER cheat. Ever. So, after listening to all of his "insecurities" and "heartbreak", I decided to take a peek at his Instagram. Mind you, I was utterly devastated, but I had a horrible gut feeling.

Nevertheless, I checked. When I opened the page, my gut sank just like all of my previous hopes and dreams for our relationship. My best friend cheated on me with my boyfriend. The little s---. Let's just say that I was a little nasty, and I texted her boyfriend. He was, fuming, to say the least. We both agreed that we would remain friends and talk on a regular basis, but we were both wrecks. We probably both are still. I know I am.

Suddenly the bell rang and knowing that I would have been late, I ran through the halls. Tears were pricking at my eyes, and I was struggling to make it to class. Cue the next catastrophe. I, being my fumbling self, tripped, broke my leg, and sprained my wrist. So, I had to call Lucifer. At the beginning of class. For help. He rushed out of the classroom and quickly found me. After this point, I can't remember what happened. I just remember Lucifer trying to keep me awake with literally no success.

After I woke up, I quickly realized that I was in my bedroom, and this is where the tale picks up. Me, fuming hot mad, embarrassed, and utterly ashamed, laying in my bed hurt. Regretfully.

End of flashback/Explanation/Needed Prior Info

Thankfully, the brothers are leaving me alone. At least after I yelled at them, made Mammon cry, had a Levi episode, Asmo trying to make it better by suggesting "fun time", and much more. Even Lucifer didn't get angry with me, so that was the one good spot in all of this mess. Satan surprisingly didn't say anything. He just left.

Satan pov:

Hhajksbiyfgaiufbajdbkhf... shwat's goin on brofers? I fweel swo dwunkth. I hwaven't dwunk anythwing wough? Fait, wshasn't (Y/N) swuper angwy?

Qwickly I walshk ower to mwy gwirlfwiend's, no (Y/N)'s, room. What wam I swayin? (Y/N) wain't me gwirlfwiend. Ha.

I knwock on (Y/N)'s dwoor, bwut she ain't answerin. Becwause of that I walk wight in. "(Y/N) where awre ywou?"

"Satan?" Oh, thwere she is. "What are you doing here? Why do you look drunk?"

"Well, I whanted two swee mwy gwirlfwiend. Oopsie, sowwy (Y/N). Ywou're mwy fwiend. Although I fwas goin to awsk ywo to hwang wout wit me."

(Y/N) pov:

"Satan. You are making no sense." I state. "Again. Why are you so drunk?"

He shrugs his shoulder sloppily. He looks super drunk. "Shwell, I cware abwout ywou. I thwink I'm dwunk off your anwger. I rweally want to dwate ywou, bwut I know thwat ywou hwave a boyfwiend. Cwould ywou cwalm down? I'm swo dwunk wight now."

"Sorry, Satan. I'll try." I concede, mainly for the poor fourth-born.

He carelessly teeters over to the bed and flops down. "Why awre ywou swo angwy?"

"It's a long story," I whisper

"Welpsh," he slurs. "I got pwenty of twime bwefore thwis wears off."

Hence how he got me to gush about everything and anything that has happened to me. I tell him about school, about the stress of being good enough, about my ex and his cheating, and literally just everything. Every once in and while Satan adds a comment with his drunk and slurry speech. Eventually, I finish telling him everything in a loud and heavy huff.

"Wosh, (Y/N). I'm swo sowwy. I would never tweat you lwike that jewk." states Satan. That is before he starts to cough violently. "Oh, geez. My head's pounding. (Y/N)? What's going on? How did I-"

I shake my head and let out a little chuckle. "You got drunk, like really drunk off of my anger. Sorry, Satan. I didn't realize that it would do that to you. I'll try to stay calmer for you."

"No." he rushes over and gently caresses my face. "If you feel hurt I want you to talk to me. What happened. Go through it again while I'm sober."

So, I go through it again. This time around I'm the one calming him down. Don't ask me how, but we ended up laying on the bed with his head on my chest.

"Satan?" I whisper.

His head shifts slightly. "Yes?"

"Do you love me? I-I m-mean... when you were drunk you said I was your girlfriend before you corrected yourself, a-and you said that you w-would d-d-date me." I quietly stutter.

He sighs into my shirt. "My stupid mouth. (Y/N), I am terribly sorry. Yes, i-it's t-t-true, but I realize that you probably aren't ready. These things take time. I do love you with all my heart, and therefore I'll wait till the end of infinity for you."

"I don't want to wait," I mumble.

His head shoots up to look me in the eyes. "(Y/N), you just broke up!?"

"Yes, I know." I shake my head at him. "But. I should have realized that you were always here with me. Supporting me. Caring for me. Also, I didn't break up with a loyal boyfriend. He was a cheater and a liar. Therefore even though I am hurt, I would like to start things with you. It would be slow but... will you show me what a boyfriend, a proper gentleman, should be like?"

"YES! I mean..." he slows and clears his throat. "Nothing would make me happier."

Excitedly, he hugs me again and reburies his head in my chest. "Satan?"

"Hmm?" his smooth voice hums.

I let out a little chuckle. "Thank you. I love you too. Could you get off my broken leg please?"

"Sorry!" he exclaims, fumbling off the bed like a goofball.

I let out a deep guttural laugh that's loud enough to attract the other brothers. "I love you Satan."

"WHAT'DA YA MEAN!!!!!????" Cue Satan chasing Mammon for the next hour due to him ruining our moment. Oh, well. Boys, brothers, will be boys.

[dykeduchess]

8, 24, 37

#8 Current hair is not as grown out as I'd like it to be, but oh shwell.

#24 Honestly, just being genuinely yourself is the best way to woo me. I'm into all sorts of gals and I just like to learn about people. Also being clear with how you feel about me? That's all it takes.

#37 These days, it's the crunchy eel sushi roll from my favorite sushi place run by an old Japanese man in the basement of a giant building I've dubbed the "Nipple Dome" in my city.

[shwell11]

@Regran_ed from @lawtactical - #Repost @edgarshermandesign ・・・ I have been putting this build through the works for a little while now. My guns pretty well tuned and I was able to test the system out in a vehicle course the other day. I'm proud of the performance and function with this build. I've pushed these components out to 700yards to running and gunning up close and its been an all around beast. Lots of solid components in this recce rifle build. Oh and did I mention the ESD sling folds perfectly up next the the LAW folder? @vortexoptics @geissele @bravocompanyusa @radianweapons @trexarms @lawtactical @magpul #Recce #Ar15 #precision #Vortexoptics #Geissele #trexarms #lawfolder #Radianweapons #ESDsling #EdgarShermanDesign #arfoldingstockadapter #lawtactical #foldingbrace #sidefoldingbrace #nsn #crane #gen3m #madeinusa🇺🇸#big3east #big3eastmedia #cenfloverland #overlanding #shwell #lifeisshwell #trd #4runner #trdpro #offroad #toyota @shwell11 @big3east https://www.instagram.com/p/BqJ4fPsHvvB/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=fcclywqenszd

[mouser26]

An oldie but a goodie

So in light of realizing I really don’t have a lot of Mags stories on here I decided to go dig through my old DA account and see if anything survived since I wasn’t the best at cross posting from Y!...and now I feel old cause Y! went down in 2016 and now is back apparently....so yeah  ANYWAYS!!!! Enjoy a gently edited (oh god this was posted how long with those errors?!) first time I and Foxy ever collabed from Nov 2008 aka the First time Mags and Cassius met The Barcrawl ( and to any new readers.....yeah Cassius just talks like that 

Cassius hated Canadian pubs. They insisted on calling them bars, and they never had the right food. How was a guy supposed to enjoy his beer without a proper accompaniment? And why had the yellow insisted on meeting here?

“Oy! You in the purple!” a strident woman’s voice rang out. “Your people tried to blow up my brother!”

“Dat’s righ’,” Cassius rumbled, sipping his beer, “but not me pers’nally. I doan do good wit splosives.”

“Well, I don’t see anyone else here,” she retorted. “Maybe I ought to take a down payment in lumps out of you!”

“I warns yer, lady,” Cassius growled. “I’s tougher dan I looks.”

“You don’t look so tough to me!” Magenta challenged.

“Wow, mouffy AN’ blind,” Cassius rumbled. “You got it bad, sister.”

Magenta’s face grew rosy to where it matched her hat and vest. Without another word, she picked up an unoccupied barstool and brought it down on Cassius’s head.

Cassius didn’t flinch; he took his beer bottle and smashed Magenta across the face, sending her soaring towards the leisure section of the bar.

She landed in the midst of a game of eight ball, and, cursing, picked up the cue stick underneath her. She stood up in the middle of the table and kicked the three and the fifteen balls at Cassius’s chest. With one fluid move, she jumped from the billiard table to the bar and pivoted, breaking the cue across Cassius’s face.

Cassius picked himself up off of the floor. Seeing Magenta aim a kick at his face, he seized the leg she was standing on and hurled her bodily into the plate glass window at the bar’s façade.

He grabbed another bottle and waited; she’d be back. One of the patrons with more alcohol than brains approached Cassius, who was picking shards of glass out of his knuckles.

“How dare you hit that lady!” He accused. “That’s not very nice at all.”

“Neither is she,” Cassius growled, “an she hit ferst. I jes hit ‘er back.”

He saw Magenta coming, and he braced for the impact. Outside, she’d landed next to a ‘Valet Parking’ sign for the restaurant next door, and she brought it with her. It caught him squarely in the side, breaking three ribs.

He grunted, and snapped the sign in half.

The patron turned to Magenta who said, “Don’t interfere!” and punched him.

Cassius grabbed the patron’s leg, Magenta grabbed his arm, and together they threw him bodily over the bar. He took out the shelf of high-end liquor and the mirror, and lay groaning behind the bar. Most of the patrons had fled; the bartender was nowhere to be seen.

“What a waste,” Cassius mumbled. “Lookit all dat good booze fallin’ on der floor.”

Magenta straightened her neck with an audible crack. “Not bad, Twinkle-toes. You ARE tougher than you look!”

“An’ yer no sloch eider,” Cassius conceded, drinking rum from a bottle with the top broken off. He offered her the bottle, and she took a long drink.

Idly, Cassius took a long splinter out from her violet hair. “Dat woulda hurt when you put yer hat back on.”

Cassius dusted the glass shards off of his purple vest. “Okay, yer smashed der stool on me head, n' I walloped yer wit der beer bottle, den you broke der poolcue 'cros m' teef, n' I sent you troo der window,” he counted out on his fingers. “Split der damage downna middle?"

“You forgot the cracked ribs, the pool table, and the guy we both sent into the bar display,” she corrected, “Otherwise it all sounds fair.”

Cassius nodded and took out his wallet. He counted several large bills and placed them under the bar counter, weighing them down with the bartender’s shotgun. “He wuz askin' fer it, callin yer a lady 'n sayin I ourtn't smack yer,” 

“An’ doan worry 'bout der ribs. I've broke dese tings more times'n I cn count. He should have ter pay fer der mirror doh, on accoun' o' his head doin' der breakin'." Cassius spat out a gob of blood. “Can’ stann innerlopers.”

Magenta snorted. “I smacked you first, you were fair ta shmack me back.” She felt her mouth, where her lower lip was already starting to match her hair. “Shon ova bish! I'm shwelling!” She clapped Cassius on the back. “Good job! Thas shom right hook ya got there.”

“I’d box, but der’s no one big enough to fight,” Cassius said, apologetically. “I'd buy yer a roun', but der bar appears to be desert'd. I know 'n all night biker bar. No place fer a lady, but yer orter be okay. I wanna see 'f yer cn drink's well as yer fight. Say, do yer like karaoke?”

“Did weh not jusht a'tablish I aint no god damn lady?” Magenta demanded. “And fer crooning a tune even if i did like it the lishener ushlly don't. LESH GO! Wait a minute, thish biker bar doesh karaoke?”

“Not yet,” Cassius rumbled. “But dey will.”

*~*~*

Hours and many many MANY drinks later Cassius and Magenta staggered tipsily down the street. “I can' bleev dat guy hekkled us berfore we got troo der first vers,” Cassius growled. “Good ting I hit him inna head wif dat hurled bottle.”

Magenta glared at him. “YOU hit him with a thrown bottle? I beg to differ. I threw that bottle, shir.”

“I hit ‘im inna head,” Cassius corrected. “YOU hit ‘im inna crosh.”

“Good point,” Magenta conceded. “ But I WARNED you I don't shing! And can you believe that whore that shaid my hair was shtupid? I mean what the fuck! She had a fucking hole in her ear the shize of a 28 gauge shell with a fucking ANKER in her lip! I have violet hair an I'm weird?!”

Cassius smirked. “I like yer hair. Mash's m' suit. An, I don' sing eider, but we got's der harm'ny down pat. Don' worry 'bout dat chick. When she wakes up wid der stishes inner forhed she'll know who's shtupid lookin'.”

Magenta howled with laugher. “DAMN SHTRAIGHT! By the by thanksh for docking her boy toy. Elsh I wouldn't have been able to shlash her sho good.”

Cassius shrugged. “Is no problem. Yer good wit dat swishblade!”

Magenta smiled. “Shtill, you are a-shom.” She tried to pat Cassius on the back, but missed the mark by a few feet.

Cassius grinned an evil smile. “He made it easy. Whenever I sees a guy wif nipple clamps anna chain froo 'em, I finks 'Dat's jes beggin t' be yanked.' I din' know he hadda Prince Albert hooked to it too, but dat's his prerorg...perogga..”

“Prerogative?” Magenta supplied

“Dat’s der bunny!” Cassius agreed.

Mags giggled. “Bunny...Shtupid fashin shatement sho was ashkin' for it! Even I don't shcream that fucking girly.”

“Der’s lotsa ways a guy cn look tough,” Cassius rumbled thoughtfully. “Dat’s gotta be one o’ der dumbest I seen, an’ dat’s sayin’ sumtin’.”

“You know,” she mused. “For a Purple, you’re not half bad.”

“An’ you’re pretty decent fer a Red girl, too,” Cassius said.

Magenta bristled. “What’s that supposed to mean? Just because I’m a girl means I can’t pull my weight? Or do you have something against Reds?”

“Nuttin’ gainst eider,” Cassius amended. “I jes tink I’m bedder at some a’ dis dan you.”

“Put your money where your mouth ish,” Mags retorted. “I’ve got a hundred bucksh that says I can do anything you can.”

“Alrigh’,” Cassius said, smirking. “Der blacks ‘ave a buildin’ roun’ here, righ’?”

“They do,” Magenta agreed, slowly. “It’s an office they ush when they’re trying to get at the White HQ, which is kinda all the time anymore.”

“Righ’,” Cassius said. He smiled and rubbed his hands together. “We gots a wager. Whoever gess der potted plant outta Black’s office is der better spy. Yer caught, ya lose. Deal?” He held out his enormous hand.

“Deal!” Mags agreed, shaking his hand.

“In der innerests of fairness,” Cassius rumbled, “We go dere inna same cab.”

“One question: what happensh if we Both get caught?”

“Den we bofe lose,” Cassius replied. “An’ we’re ebenly mashed as Spies. We calls it a draw.”

*~*~*

Rusty raised an eyebrow as he looked at the unknown number flashing on his phone. It was a sealed number though so it has to be someone familiar he reasoned as he answered, "Resident robo speaking."

“Rusty?” Mags asked. “It’s me. I need a pick-up at…WHAT PRECINCT IS THIS?...precinct 18, downtown… wait, WHICH DOWNTOWN? ….I’M FROM GATINEAU THAT’S WHY!…Ottawa. Can you bring bail money for…I see ten, but only four of them are ours.”

“Remin’ me,” Cassius groaned, “How did we end up here?”

“Well after we caught you two bickering over the theft of a potted plant,” Seventy-two started, “Brother and I convinced you two that dancing would be as much fun as Karaoke. So, we went downtown to the hippest club and somehow managed to get in.”

“I think the big guy bribed the bouncer,” Twenty-seven mused. “But regardless of how, we got in. The hottest dance crew in town was on the floor, they danced in front of us,”

“We got challenged,” Seventy-two continued. “I told the big guy and the woman. They looked at each other,”

“And together, they punched out the front man,” finished Twenty-seven. “Then, they proceeded to mop the floor with the rest of the crew.”

“Hey,” Mags retorted, “if they didn’t want to get beat up, they shouldn’t have thrown down in the first place. Besides it was a fair fight: two of us, eight of them.”

“That was bad enough,” Seventy-two said, “but did you two have to take on the whole SWAT team?”

“Dey said her hair was funny,” Cassius mumbled. “I had to knock dose tree out, odderwise we’d be in for longer. Smackin’ a cop is a shorter sen’ance dan rippin’ ‘is goolies off via his nosdril.”

“I would have done nothing of the sort,” sniffed Magenta.

“Then why did you threaten to do just that?” Seventy-two countered. “Every man in the club winced in sympathy pain.”

“Sides, der cops asked us nicely to come along,” Cassius said. “If dey’s willin’ to be polite abou’ it, I figger we might as well come ‘long peaceably.”

“They hit you with three tear gas grenades and tazered you at least six times,” protested Twenty-seven. “That’s what you call polite?”

“Dey dint use der guns or battans,” Cassius said. “Dose tazers were nice; dey tickled. Once Rusty gets ‘ere, I tink I need breakfast. Who wants homme, ommer..”

“Omelets?” Magenta suggested

“Dat’s der bunny!” Cassius agreed.

“I don’t know where you’ll put them,” Mags said. “Over the course of the night, you drank eight beers, fourteen assorted shots, a bottle of rum and a coke, and a centerpiece bud vase with a rose in it.”

“Tought dat one tasted a bit torny,” Cassius rumbled. “An’ yer one ter talk. You matched me on alla dat.”

“Couldn’t have you show me up, could I!” she countered. “And you’re right, it DID taste thorny!”

“MAGS!” Rusty finally yelled, interupting the four-way recounting of what sounded like a wild night.

He could picture Magenta staring at the receiver in her hand a moment before remembering who was on the line, “Hey Rusty.”

"... You do know I record all my calls, right?"

"...Fuck."

Rusty managed to hold in a chuckle, “Do we need an armored car or can I just pick you up?"

"Uh... I got two blacks and a purple...what do you think?

"... Fuck, I'm just going to get the nice company car to do this kind of crap. Google maps says I'll be there in about Forty-five minutes. Are you armed? Wait, don't answer that. ... WHAT are you armed with?"

"I left my babies at home. I HAD A SWITCHBLADE BUT THEY TOOK IT!"

“Actually you lost it when that one dancer kicked your hand,” Twenty-seven chirped.

“And his girlfriend tried to bite your ear off,” Seventy-two added

“Oh yeah…”

“Probably for the best...” Rusty muttered quietly. "Well, I'll get your spare from your desk as a security blanket of death. How's that? Anything else I should know about? What are the sobriety levels?"

"Hang on let me check… How sober are you bitches?!"

"Hung-over and hungry!”

“Dat depends,” Cassius mumbled. “Did I jes step on m’own fingers?”

“No sir,” an unknown voice, Rust assumed another prisoner cried. “You’re standing on mine.”

“Den nuttin’ a Bloody Mary woan fix,” Cassius said. “Or are yer a scewdriver woman?”

“I’m a Sonic Screwdriver woman, thanks to my darling partner. Electrolytes over acid. There’s your answer,” she said into the phone. 

"... I'll have Laurie call me en route to see what's open. On my way."

“Thanks Rusty!”

“Den les’ get outta here,” Cassius picked up the groaning twins by the back of their belts. “I got der lightweights. C’n you get der door?”

“Yep. Hey Rust, we’ll be outside. Trust me, you can’t miss us.” She hung up the jail cell’s pay phone.

“Let’s go”

“Damn!” Cassius smacked his forehead with the heel of his right hand, eliciting a groan from twenty-seven.

“What’s wrong?” Magenta asked, picking the jail cell lock.

“I wuz gonna meet a Yellow at der bar we net at.”

“Really?” Magenta looked up from the lock. “I was supposed to meet a Yellow there too. Think the bastard set us up?”

“Hell of a coinkydink,” Cassius growled, shifting his hold so he had the twins under each arm safe and sound.

“Next time I’m thank the bitch before I shoot him,” Mags soothed as she finally devoted her attention to the lock, earning a laugh from the purple agent.

[mercurial-speed]

Last Hunters Haikus The few, the skilled, the Hunters Tanks better beware

Ah Muzen Cab

Underrated God

Incredibly powerful

“OH GOD NOT THE BEES!”

Chiron

Teaches the Heroes

Sounds like Sean Connery tho

He’sh sho shuper shwell

Neith

She’s the World Weaver

She should weave herself some clothes

Or higher skillcap...

Ullr

I’m not gonna lie

Good Ullr players are so rare

But so impressive

Xbalanque

Really fun to play

His brother’s head is a gourd...

Moves like a Jaguar

[galaxy--supernova]

Voltron s5 - Mimi’s liveblog

Nothing on ep 1. It went by too quick, plus I forgot i wanted to do this.

Ep 2

SO HAGGAR NOW REMEMBERS THAT LOTOR IS HER SON

WHEN DID HE POP OUT OF HER CRUSTY VAGINA??? WAS SHE PREGNANT WHEN SHE WENT INTO THE QUINTESSENCE BATH?! BUT SHE WAS A ZOMBIE EVEN THEN

WHEN DID THEY DO THE DO? HOW?! WAS IT ARTIFICIAL INSEMINATION?!  I DO NOT UNDERSTAND

OPERATION KURON STAGE 4 BITCH WHAT THE FUCK

Zarkon - “My darkest shame?!” Bruh you helped make him. Clearly you had a choice in the matter. 

Lotor doesn’t seem to know Haggar is his mommy

Zarkon is an earth bender now

OOOOOOOOOOOH PIDGE GAVE AXCA A CONCUSSION

CORAN CORAN THE GORGEOUS MAN

I love commander Holt

MOTHER FUCKER IS ZARKON DEAD FOR REAL

LION KING MUSIC

 EP 3

POSTMORTEM WHAT KIND OF MOTHERFUCKING DARKNESS IS THIS???

DING DONG THE PSYCHO’S GONE

I DO NOT LIKE THIS

WHAT THE FUCK CORAN THE EEL??????????

KRAL ZERA

Shiro yelled at Lance…Could it be...Ku…Kuron? Is it true?

So Haggar’s…seeing through Shiro? But that could also mean he’s hacked, bc Narti was, most likely, not a clone. In fact we saw the moment Haggar hacked Narti.

I thought Haggar was going to be Narti, opening up the door to the dark trio’s cell. But no, it looks like Narti is really dead.

See now the Galra are hacking the plants, so Shiro could be hacked!

Haggar – “AN IRON WILL AN IRON FIST?!” DOES SHE MEAN LOTOR OR KEITH?! bc Keith was my first thought.

MOTHER FUCKING HACKED PLANTS THIS IS WHY I’M A KURON DENIER

Voltron in a cocoon mother fuckers

SHIRO OH MY GOD WHAT THE FUCK A RE YOU SAYING?!

IS LANCE IN THE BLACK LION?! MY HEART’S FUCKING POUNDING Oh no Shiro’s in the black lion

We went SNK on this animation lol

LANCE STARING AT SHIRO

SENDAK OH MY GOD

“didn’t he die in like ep 3?” – Alyssa on Sendak

EP 4

CHRIST IN A HANDBASKET I AM NOT READY

YAY KEITH IS BACK

“WHAT’S UP WITH SHIRO” OH MY GOD SAVE MEEEEEEEEE (“THE MICE PROBABLY KNOW” – Alyssa in response)

Wait does Keith not know Zarkon is dead?

(Keith finds Shiro and be like “but what if you’re Shiro, WHO’S DRIVING THE LION?!” –Richard and Alyssa)

“IT’S THE OLYMPIC FLAME” – Alyssa

ICE PLANET, SHWELL

Yay, bloodbath!!!

“fight, fight, fight!” Richard

While he’s monologue-ing, somebody grab the stick and run!!!

(Imagine Lotor whistles and he’s at the top of the steps like, “Hey guys, how y’all doin?”)

But clearly the blade of Marmora aren’t communicating with Voltron if Shiro and Lotor don’t know about the explosives.

So Lotor knows about Honerva. No one knows Honerva and Haggar are the same person…apparently.

BLOODBATH

SHIRO SHOT SENDAK INTO DEEP SPACE THOUGH?! HOW IS HE HERE?! (“And then Axca found him. The cat came back the very next day” – Alyssa)

All hail the king

(“THE BEACONS ARE LIT GONDOR CALLS FOR AID” – Alyssa )

Ep 5

Oh so Hunk has a mom at least.

Marco, Luis, Veronica – Lance’s siblings have names!

Aw Coran! “It’s filthy!”

THE PUNK TRIO

HUNK TOSSING HIS HELMET

SCRAM – I LOVE THIS SENTRY

Keith u nerd, talking to yourself

“Blend in with the debris” OOPS NOW U ARE DEBRIS

FUCK NO NONE OF THIS ALLURA/LOTOR I SHALL NOT HAVE IT

Does….Lotor truly not know Honerva and Haggar were the same person? How could he not?!

THRONE SELFIES I LOVE THESE KIDS

RAZZLE-DAZZLE GOD BLESS

Allura figured out Haggar…I guess Lotor is in denial

OH MY GOD I LOVE THE SENTRY

DUNDUNDUN, KEITH MOMMA!!!

EP6

Me – “it’s a graveyard.” Coran – “it’s a graveyard.” I called it!!!

“It’s a white hole.” “Ha, take that theoretical physics!”

“Navigating by cave poetry” – Hunk

Where are the mice???

SHIRO NOT FEELING LIKE HIMSELF MOTHER FUCKING FUCK ME INTO DEEP SPACE

“do you wanna go throw things at the crew?” THIS GIRL IS A SAVAGE

(“I CAN SHOW YOU THE WORLD” – Alyssa)

(“EVERYTHING THE LIGHT TOUCHES” – Also Alyssa)

Oh god Lotor’s hair is so extra

ALLURA GIVING HER LIFE TO LEARN THE SECRETS OF LIFE I AM NOT ON THIS EARTH ANYMORE

THE WAY LOTOR WAS LOOKING AT ALLURA WHEN THEY WERE BACK ON THE SHIP I AM NOT LIKING THIS ONE BIT

[springroove]

THE KIDS!!!! i need to stop making self-indulgent art but oh shwell. my ocs max and marigold + @firelordloki‘s ocs rowan and shikoba.