#Off Office

[ot3]

i gotta admit this is a new take on vote blue no matter who than i've seen recently

[hinamie]

itakugi sillies fr the soul

[bamsara]

I can be your angle....or your debil....

small peak for a wips I finished last night that I'll post later today

[rooksunday]

the image of an exhausted commander fox, sitting in his office, throttling a datapad and yelling WHY IS MY JOB SPREADSHEETS?? before yowling like a space banshee and frisbeeing the thing through the open window with all the force of kamino-guaranteed strength bolstered by buereaucratic rage, where the datapad sails merrily and speedily for a longer distance than many would credit before impacting with concussive force against the surprisingly soft skull of emperor palpatine, gladhanding for the press in the courtyard of the senate below

the resulting explosion is caught on many cameras

[flurmitcraff]

Joe, regarding the permit office: "I'm not an ask for permission person I'm more of a seek forgiveness person but also I don't really care if they forgive me so I'm just kind of a person. Good luck!"

[bluegiragi]

docile.

early access + nsfw on patreon

[biboomerangboi]

Sometimes I think about Zuko being the Firelord and I just giggle like yeah it is an angsty situation, yes it’s got great fanfic material but guys your just going to give a 17 year old a whole country. Like not even a normal trained from birth Prince you’ve got a guy that was officially the Crown Prince for like 3 years and then he was out at sea causing problems. His special skills include hunting the avatar, B&E, being buddies with mythical beasts, prison breaks and customer service and you gave him the ultimate power to do whatever he wants. Not to mention he’s got friends who are just as insane and feral and he’s got all the money. Toph and Sokka are going to talk him into the most insane purchases in seconds. Guys c’mon.

[foldingfittedsheets]

So on Tuesday my wife and I dropped off the paperwork to register as legally married and as part of that I want to finally legally change my name. I haven’t used my deadname in decades and I’m so ready.

But the very nice lady at the Recorders office said we’d need to go through Social Security for name changes. Since we were already in the city we walked to the SS office.

The ground floor was like a TSA, with scanners and guards. They asked, “Do you have any weapons?”

We both did. My wife held out their cute Swiss Army knife which got an immediate pass. Mine caused more issue, though. It’s a cute little knife, it folds up to look like a leaf and unfolds into a blade. I showed the man and he looked gravely concerned.

When he asked to see it closer I obliged, folding it closed so I could take it off my key ring to hand over. And this man. This buff security man. Could not open my cutesy little knife to save his life. He futilely pawed at it from all different angles while I tried to say, “Look, you can see the hinge, just pull at the top…”

Finally he had to hand it back so I could open it for him. Then two other men came over and all three Very Serious Security Men in a Federal Building pored over my tiny cute knife with great intensity and concern. A ruler was produced and they conferred in hushed whispers.

I was honestly trying not to laugh when he finally passed it back and said I could keep it, but cautioned me not to pull it out. I solemnly agreed, returning my tiny weapon to my key ring.

[starry-bi-sky]

do yall ever think about bruce/batman!clone danny standing in front of his bathroom mirror after finding out he was a clone and silently tracing his face. The slope of his jaw and point of his chin. The high angle of his cheekbones and the shape of his eyes, the curve of his brow bones and the shape of his nose. The volume of his hair and the way it curls and gets fluffy when it gets too long.

His hair is black the same way a crow's wing is black. His dad's hair is black the same way a black bear's fur is black. His dad's eyes are blue like the ocean is blue. Danny's eyes are blue the same way a glacier is blue.

His dad has a square jaw and straight flat hair, and he tans and gets a face full of freckles when he's out in the sun for too long. Danny burns like a lobster and his face remains untouched. Danny has a sharp jaw and tall cheekbones, and Sam says when he's not smiling there's almost something regal about him. You would never call Jack Fenton "regal" when he's not smiling.

Sam says when he's not smiling he looks scary the same way a stone statue is. Jack Fenton when he's not smiling looks scary the same way that german shepherd staring at you across the street is.

Do you ever think he grew up wondering if he was adopted. Because of course, he has black hair and blue eyes like his dad. But having the same color doesn't make you someone's child.

Or, worse, things he's heard from the other kids and the other parents and even some of his teachers growing up; that he was the product of an affair. And that his dad was just too stupid to notice. And Danny would defend his parents until the day he died, because Jack Fenton wasn't an idiot and Maddie Fenton wasn't a cheater.

But doubt comes in with fickle tongue. his parents swear up and down that he is their child when he asks about either. That Danny just had his grandparents' features, but he was their son and they loved him.

But Danny doesn't look like either of his parents. His mom's eyes are blue like an aquamarine and Jazz's too. And they burn like lobsters in the sun too, but Jazz gets freckles on her face and so does Maddie. And as Danny grows up he doesn't bulk up or get stocky like his dad did, and when he hits puberty he doesn't shoot up like a tree like Jack Fenton did.

He stays small, and they say he's a late bloomer (and he is), or that he just has his mom's height. But he's fast and has good stamina, and some days it feels like he's built entirely different from his family. That the things they went through growing up just didn't apply to him. Jack and Maddie Fenton both had acne and breakouts when they hit puberty, and Jazz inherits it and he's seen the amount of skincare products she keeps on her side of the bathroom.

And then he hits puberty and breaks out maybe once or twice, but his skin stays clear for the most part and the problems and changes his dad went through just don't happen to him.

And the truth is worse than all of the lies.

How horrifying.

[cubbihue]

so pixies regularly try to take over fairyworld is timmy on the pixie side?

At first, Timmy was adamantly against the Pixies. He'd tell Jorgen every time he got a notice of their plans to take over Fairyworld, and work to stop it! But it gets a bit harder to resist against your own court the longer you hang out with them.

In the present time, Timmy schedules to be out of FairyWorld during their takeovers. He doesn't try to stop them, but also refuses to be anywhere near when it happens.

He... doesn't like how he's slowly starting to cheer for them. Or how their arguments are becoming more convincing. Or how he's struggling to recall why he was so against them to begin with.

There will come a point where he becomes an active participant. Timmy worries that it's coming sooner than he'd like.

Bitties Series: [Start] > [Previous] > [Next]

[emilybeemartin]

Just to tie in my two themes this month----

Additional notes, because poll options apparently limit their characters:

Frodo finds great peace in watching the tides rise and fall throughout each day. He attends all the ranger programs on birds and seashells and fills pages with sketches and poetry.

Sam meticulously selects postcards in the gift shop for each of his friends and spends a whole morning writing and addressing them. He also buys Junior Ranger hats for his kids and a variety of Appalachian jams for Rosie.

Park rangers launch a Missing Person search for Aragorn when they realize his car's been parked at Avalanche Creek for three days. The search runs for almost a week before he comes strolling out the opposite side of the park, supporting one of the SAR techs who twisted an ankle during the search.

Legolas is first drawn to Olympic for the towering, mossy temperate rainforests, but the ground goes out from under him when he steps onto Second Beach for the first time. He spends an entire day watching the light and tides shift on the sea stacks, and he leaves feeling both full and hollow, like a bell that's just been rung.

Mammoth is only Gimli's first stop on a cavern tour, followed by Jewel and Wind Caves and Carlsbad Caverns. Wind Cave is his favorite for the unusual formations. He makes an obnoxious tween boy cry in Carlsbad for breaking off a speleothem.

Boromir is on a tour of military parks. He asks so many questions to the intern working the info station at Fort Sumter the kid has to go find the park historian. His favorite site is Vicksburg because that place was buckwild, though he silently judges one of the reenactors for his clumsy handling of a black powder rifle.

Merry also makes stops in Jurassic and Dinosaur National Monuments. He watches every park video, takes selfies in front of all the fossil exhibits, and earns his Junior Ranger badge at each one. He buys a keychain for Pippin.

Pippin actually gets four citations, mostly for trying to stick his hands in mud pots. He doesn't mean anything by it---he's just so delighted and curious about the bizarre landscape. He winds up with several thermal burns and dumps a king's ransom in the donation box on his last day.

Gandalf gets dinged by rangers for not paying the $5 fee for Trunk Bay, but he acts senile until they eventually decide to drop it. He gets postcards from everyone and responds to none of them.

Faramir and Eowyn are traveling together and do many of the same hikes and rides, but they do have some different preferences off-trail. Eowyn drags Faramir to a rodeo and the Million Dollar Cowboy Bar in Jackson Hole, and he goads her into Ranger Shelton Johnson's living history programs on the Buffalo Soldiers in Yosemite.

Eomer is bike-packing on his sport cruiser motorcycle. He goes to Roosevelt south unit for the wild horse herds but ends up spending half a day watching a prairie dog town. He takes 400 photos of them, mostly blurry, and texts them to Eowyn.

[catermeow]

The DHP office is so… liminal. Misplaced. Hidden away from sight, a building and parking lot one might expect to see in a major city instead located in the middle of a forest, no roads in or out. There is no way in. If you force entry, you are greeted by a vast empty room, the only furniture a receptionist desk and filing cabinets in the center of the room. There is a single light hanging above it. 

There is a man standing behind the desk. There is no one else there. You approach, and inquire about… something. The words don’t feel like your own. The man smiles, an average customer service smile, but there seems to be some tinge of malice behind it. He explains the forms that need to be filled out, the paperwork that needs to be signed- this is such a long process, you know. 

The light seems to be getting dimmer. You look up, and it has begun corroding, decaying as you stand there watching. Some of the words the man says don’t make sense- you’d think they were gibberish, but something about this place is off, and you don’t trust yourself right now. You ask what he means. He says he’ll have to put you on hold for a moment, and music begins to play. You feel almost rooted in place. The man stares at you silently. The light gets dimmer. You can’t move. The music, pleasant at first, begins to grate. Finally, the man leaves, disappearing behind those file cabinets. You still can’t move. It feels like an eternity. Moss has started creeping its way up the cabinets. The ceiling is leaking. The floor is eroding. The light gets dimmer. You don’t want to move. 

Something pops, and suddenly the music is gone. The man is back. You can move again. The light is back to normal, no sign of any damage. The room is pristine. The man says something about the paperwork not being quite ready yet, you’ll have to come back later. You aren’t really listening, something in your brain is screaming that something is wrong. You want to leave. You don’t want to come back. Something about the man’s blank eyes seems to look through you, and you get the feeling you won’t have a choice. You thank him. You leave. You want to run, get as far from that place as possible. You walk.

You enter the forest, and turn for a final look at that strange building. There’s nothing there but more forest. Something doesn’t feel right.

[cozylittleartblog]

val is kind of a freak

[itsnotacostume]

we as a fandom do not talk about this scene enough. what the fuck is this. why did he feel the need to install this? so he could stare at his boybestfriend all day without having to get up?

[loktauri]

Tma au where nothing is wrong ever and Jon gets to pet as many cats as he likes

[cammy-mcspammy]

I finally drew Fiddlestan (and them for the first time too)

Should I do another part gang...