#Of course love can be it's own thing.
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#🐉#this is what i love about being involved in community spaces for fiction though tbh#everyone has different personalized interpretations of the source material and some of them align with my own or make me go 'oh huh i never#thought of that but yeah i can see it' while some of them just dont compute at all and make me wonder if we saw the same thing#which of course. we didnt. or rather we saw the same objective source material but we *saw* it completely differently through the lens of#our own experiences and worldview.#its so cool#however i will sometimes be a hypocritical little hater about it
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Wait you guys are actually buying Disney products I thought it was a joke
(READ TAGS FOR FULL CONTEXT Sorry it’s long dies
#Honestly I’m only bothered bc I feel partially responsible (WTF EGOMANIAC OVER HERE)#I know I can’t control other people’s spending habits and my own habits are. Less than ideal !!#But when I wanted to spread my love for Wreck it Ralph I didn’t want people to get that takeaway 😔#IMPORTANT NOTE ‼️It’s okay to express your love for something through buying official things !!! That DOESN’T make you a “bad person” !!!#Still ! I think we have to let ourselves feel bothered by things and we need to be more critical of exploitative companies#Of course I chose to watch inside out 2 with my mom in theaters so I’m not immune lmao. Also using amazon / Etsy … just as a whole#But if you need help finding Disney movies without supporting them please just ask me!! PLEASE don’t use Disney+ if you can avoid it#I know we are all capable of finding our fulfillment from better places. But sometimes it’s hard#Capitalism sucks and yet that’s how we are endlessly pressured to live :(#We’re all at different points in our lives. Sometimes self care involves consumerism#Be hopeful that it someday won’t have to#Txt#again I’m sorry if this comes off as horribly egotistical to even consider being single-handedly responsible for#Social media is bad …. numbers bad…. Distorts reality and your perception of yourself…..#Or as me trying to guilt trip people in any way. Genuinely do what makes you happy but WE CAN BE HAPPIER & HEALTHIER I KNOW WE CAN#Wreck it ralph#Rant#Also sorry I have huge beef with streaming services I don’t mean to enforce that on other people but also. Sharing my opinion
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"after what you've put me through here i deserve this" armand says about killing the crying, exhausted boy in his arms and it's not about a meal or cleaning up the mess, really, it's about how this boy's been brought to the edge of accepting death; he's right there, longing for it, and armand can give it. and while he gives it, he feels it too. armand has been drowning for centuries, but he keeps himself afloat this way, by tasting death and feeling just the smallest respite, chasing his victims' slowing heartbeats right down into the dark until he backs away at the last moment. "the comfort we all long for." the comfort armand longs for -- the end.
#its my understanding that hes basically been passively suicidal for forever#but theres a multitude of things stopping him from ever ending it himself#he calls those “half in love with an easeful death” because the way he understands it they're still holding onto life like he is#they're not actively suicidal. but he can give them what he thinks they 'truly' long for like him#hes king of projecting so watching louis try to “leave him for death” so 'easily' also contributed to making something in him snap#its why he makes it all about himself and doesnt consider Why louis did what he did. just that he did it and it hurt armand to watch#its why hes certain daniel wants to die. why hes certain claudia will kill herself one day. its all about his own feelings#and the death he craves but ultimately fears#and of course he wont let louis chase the comfort of death because then he'll be alone. they have to endure together#iwtv#armand
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Small detour of what I usually post, but I absolutely wish (other) clown the best of luck during these confusing and almost hopeless times- nobody knows how to deal with such amount of attention in such short amount of time- a blessing and a curse to behold
#Seeing their posts absolutely shattered me#I may never be able to relate to how he’s going through rn but at least I can relate to the fear of living in absolute fear#the fear of unable to be yourself in your own home with creative and personal freedom#The fear of being terrified that the thing that gives you the most innocent happiness will be heavily demonized and threatened#The fear of getting caught doing something you love and being yourself with your found identity#The fear of destruction#I relate heavily to this and to feel you are going to be caught doing anything that isn’t a crime hurts#I wish him safety and love during these stressful days#He’s brought so much joy to my life that I must keep private irl too#Whatever he decides for the fandom I will fully support it#I will still continue posting of course unless he wishes otherwise#If he sees this (which I doubt) hey other clown lmao- you are loved and not alone#It may be scary but you are not alone- you will never be alone#There will always be people out there who love you and there will always be those who are not even worth giving time of day#The internet is both a blessing and a cruel cruel unforgiving place#I hope it doesn’t deter you from doing what you love and hold dear#I hope you have anyone you can be with online or in irl that can give you the comfort you need#You deserve peace and security#Do what you feel is best#Welcome home
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compilation of damen “my wife is a bitch and i like him so much” moments i clipped/highlighted during my first reading. it may seem that damen is professing dislike for laurent in some of these, but i'm certain that in books 2&3 he'd write the insults in glitter gel pen with little hearts in the margins. he enables laurent's evil zoomies (usually to the detriment of everyone else around them) with equal parts affection and horrified fascination. damen knows his dog will bite everyone in a ten foot radius, but still takes him to the park unleashed because the foul beast needs enrichment. he posts pictures of laurent terrorizing the neighborhood on instagram and describes them as #cute in the caption. if anyone tries to suggest otherwise they are blocked on sight.
honorable mention to this quote from book 1 which doesn't quite fit the theme but still made me laugh very hard:
#damen is not a pushover tho! he’s very clever and he courageously wears his heart on his sleeve. he tries to assume the best in people...#...but he still has moral integrity. he’s much closer to his own humanity than the VERY traumatized and jaded laurent.#laurent has moral integrity too of course. that's why they like each other so much. their morals are just complex and often misunderstood#people can be multiple things sometimes and they can change! i love that aspect of the series.#capri#captive prince#cs pacat#damen of akielos#laurent of vere#lamen#prince's gambit#kings rising#also idk why i redacted one mention and not the other but idk i think the context feels different for the second one#nsft
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How did you come up with roleswap Elfilis' design? It's really cool!
Hi! Thank you so much! :D I'd love to share my thought process! Gather round the armchair by the fireplace, friends! It's story time!
I've said before that the Forgotten Land Roleswap started off as a doodle that swapped Dedede and Bandana Dee's roles as Player 2 and the Brainwashed Beast. But when I realized how fun that one little change was, how about EVEN MORE changes? That's how my one-time doodle turned into the full AU story. I swapped Meta Knight and Kirby, Clawroline and Leongar, and Sillydillo and Gorimondo- and because the story is so Waddle-Dee centric, I promoted Dedede to "Player 1" since the stakes would be higher for him as their King.
So now I had a story that had a lot of opposite traits to canon and I wanted to explore that further! When it came to the matter of Elfilin, I thought he would probably behave too similarly towards Dedede and Meta as he did to Kirby and Bandee. He'd be friendly and trusting, communicative, optimistic, knowledgeable, and cooperative. So how about providing them a travel companion who is defensive, has trouble communicating, a little wild, uninformed about themselves and the world around them, and has a bit of a temper?
But working with all these opposite traits didn't feel in-character for Elfilin anymore. So my natural next step was to swap Elfilin with Elfilis and make a new version of the Forgotten Land's lost little pup!
Enough yapping about the context behind my decisions, tho. How'd I come up with Roleswap Elfilis' design?
I see you out there, Fecto Forgo fans. Maybe somebody out there's thought, "Roleswap Elfilis does not look like them! Why not? That's what the other 50% of the Ultimate Life Form looks like! I demand justice for the angry glowing rat fetus!"
Maybe nobody has ever thought this. But I wonder sometimes lol
Your feelings are valid, friends. Please lemme explain my reasonings.
This fella, to me, is the abandoned wet specimen left to float in a jar for who-knows-how-long after a forcible physical and mental separation via spatial teleportation shenanigans. And I think part of their appearance is due to their role as the trapped and forgotten half.
The role of the half that got away fully formed his own body and inherited some traits from the complete being-
For Elfilin in canon, he got ears that are proportionally huge compared to the rest of his body, blue eyes that sparkle with the light of a thousand destroyed planets, a tiny bit of pink fur for his adorable blushies, and a really long fluffy tail. Maybe becoming a being free of chaos gave him those sweet eyes like Kirby and the Waddle Dees have.
My reasoning is that whichever half ends up escaping the Lab and fully forming their own body, they would carry the major physical traits the other wouldn't inherit.
Anyway, that left Elfilis with the horns, colorful and expressive eyes, whiskers, beige chest fluff, opposable thumbs, and pink tummy fur.
Elfilin gets the long tail in the bodily divorce so Elfilis has a short stubby little cotton tail like a bunny. Like if he ended up with just the very tip of the Ultimate Life Form's tail.
Behold this diagram above I came up with two years ago! Disclaimer: the canon Elfilin is the one in the chart. And I draw him a little differently these days lol. I ain't showing anyone how he ended up in the Roleswap yet tho!!!! >:0
But Roleswap Elfilis is more than just "baby version of the Ultimate Life Form..."
All the differences in the Forgotten Land Roleswap from canon stem from one event in the timeline. One change that I added to the events that were already supposed to take place. It's why the Ultimate Life Form split differently. Why the Beasts have different roles and aesthetics. Even why the portal took Bandana Dee and Kirby before Meta Knight and King Dedede.
How did that saying go again? The flap of wings somewhere can influence a bunch of huge changes somewhere else down the line...? What was the name of that theory again....? Hmm. Not important, I guess.
Anyway, the end!! You sly dog, you got me monologuing!!1! /lighthearted
#roleswap ask#Thanks for reading today's episode of Jojo's monologues HEHEHE#I really do put a lot of thought into these things and I can't help spilling whenever I'm asked!#I'm just really happy and excited about all of this building I'm doing!#And of course most of this is my own personal theory and conjecture#in no way am I saying “MY THEORIES ARE THE ONLY RIGHT ONES”#or claim that my roleswap au about the Forgotten Land game can be the only one just because I thought about it a lot#I love seeing different conclusions and interpretations in this series. especially if they're wildly different than mine#it's why the Kirby series feels so special to me. I genuinely just want to have fun and experience others' fun too :3#roleswap scraps#elfilis#elfilin#forgotten land roleswap#headcanons#ALSO I'M SORRY ANON it's been literal months since this ask.#I'm sorry for the person that I am lol sometimes it just takes a long time for me to get these things out#I love asks and questions and cherish them! I promise <3
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#not art (yet!!!!)#preddy good kristen I got goin on in this piece#for some reason my brain isnt letting me do this one. been stalling on it for a good few days. but I intend to break thru it#I need to put this on paper at least once#(its space sweepers. I think it would be funny if the kids are in that universe too but theyre just like off to the side doing their own#thing pretty much unrelated to the main plot. theyre delivery people. theyre all still teens. they get up to shenanigans and then#one day they look up like huh the guy who founded eden fucking died?? when#kristen specifically I got a decent amount hashed out in my brain somehow. she's like an engineered messiah with a grafted engine#along her upper body skeleton that'd let her spontaneously rearrange objects on a molecular level#so she can theoretically knit wounds or cure diseases by thinking abt it very hard#sadly the engine of course takes enormous amount of energy to power. so most of the time in practice she just#has a half-metal skeleton that doesn't do anything. so she's buff as shit on the upper side and one of her punches can break your neck#but her mobility is limited and she sprains her ankles like every other week. her shins have broken like a few times#I genuinely love the way her shoes n braces look in this one its very fun#there are a lot of choices I made in this one that are so fun and also just like. a result of putting them in space sweepers#and thinking to myself here and there hey this would be cool if it harkens back to their canon designs#not riz tho other than being human he is fully exactly like how he looks in canon. hes just like that#hes the navigator and he charts their courses by hand with a school calculator#(also technically their legal counselor since he's sorta responsible for not putting them in traffic control's hands)#drawing this does make me realise a lot of these dynamics are really fun lol. idk if Im gonna ever do anything like proper for this but#at the very least if I draw this the idea will be out there)
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Wait did both Alice and Zane record Alan when he was at his lowest point? Didn't Alice make her exhibition to show the world what she sees? To show Alan the truth about himself? That it never was Scratch visiting and terrorizing her, but Alan himself? Did she depict his "self" and Zane depicted his "persona"? The two sides of him that he wishes he can eliminate bc they brought him into trouble (Scratch representing anger and the fallouts with paparazzi and stuff, Zane representing his self-destructive behavior with alcohol and drugs and the party nights)? The both sides that caused his marriage to start falling apart? Was that the reason Zane made that video of Alan when they were on that booze and drug-fueled bender while working on the Return manuscript? Is this party video the companion piece?? Alan's downward spiral, same as Alice's photos? Do they fucking work together aasdffjfjfkfk
#Can this game please stop messing with my head??#I mean we don't know how many years passed since Alice went to the dark place#She could have met Zane long ago. Over Zane's similar appearance to Alan they both have a connection to him#So they talk about him. They understand that they must help Alan to ascend the spiral bc he's too far gone to do it himself#Or Alan wrote them in their story as a plot decide bc he understood at one point that he must confront his lesser pleasant parts#In order to become “whole”#And he seems to deliberately ignore how close his marriage is to fail. Her POV is so different from his. Of course she mourns him#Bc she never stopped loving him. Although he did the things he did. That's simply not how love works.#Alan is a good man although he makes selfish and terrible decisions and has a questionable morale at times. Bc he thinks he can do it right.#Bc he thinks he can correct his mistakes later. That's how he's always been. He thinks a flower bouquet and chocolate and a bottle of wine#Is all he needs to give to Alice and she will forgive him. He was incapable to acknowledge his shortcomings but he tries!! In his own way!#And alice sees it. And she has accepted it's for the longest time. Alan is emotionally constipated except for his anger.#Guy needs to do some serious self reflection#alan wake 2#Alan wake theory#Alan wake 2 theory#Alan wake 2 meta#Alan Wake#Alice Wake#Thomas Zane#Tom Zane#Sorry for the endless fucking notes 🙏
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My name is [BRUTUS] and my name means [HEAVY] so with a [HEAVY] heart I'll guide this dagger Into the heart of my enemy
Something about having absolutely no choice in who you marry. About being literally forced by the law to spill blood - to accept this stranger as your husband over a man you truly care for or accept the fact that the man you love might die because you put him in danger. Something about risking becoming the wife of a man you've never even seen before a few minutes prior because you know anything would be better than putting your beloved in harm's way. Something about the trust inherent in that decision and in the way she speaks of it after. Truthfully, T'Pring doesn't know the captain and she doesn't know Spock. Either one of them could have taken her as their wife but she does know Stonn. She knows that Stonn will remain by her side no matter what. They made a plan together. They have an agreement which T'Pring believes will be upheld even though the plan changed with the arrival of Kirk. Stonn will always be there, always, and Stonn will be hers. Something about the language used around T'Pring: Ownership, subservience, non-personhood. T'Pring is an object that Spock can win. She cannot reject him, she has no say in the matter other than having Stonn 'claim' her instead. Even when Spock leaves after being very clearly rejected by T'Pring he says "Stonn, she is yours." as if despite her clear rejection he still owns her and is must formally 'give' her to Stonn. But the language T'Pring uses around Stonn is a break from that: "There was Stonn who wanted very much to be my consort, and I wanted him." Stonn who wanted very much to be HER consort and she WANTED him. The language here is very particular - It's not, for example: "Stonn wanted me to be his wife" - he is HERS. And she WANTS him. There's a mutual affection there and a strong trust - a trust which seems to be well founded since Stonn (though silent) stands by her side at the end of the episode. <- That might seem small but if Spock would reject her for 'daring to challenge' (again, the language is not 'because I don't want you' but more of an implied disgust at her having the AUDACITY to reject him) then it's not a stretch to assume that it'd be considered an insult in the TOS Vulcan society to NOT choose Stonn as her champion after a prior agreement. Anyway T'Pring was a woman in an impossible situation within a society which saw her as more of an object than a person and she wanted Stonn and Stonn wanted to be hers and she trusted that he would understand if she had to publicly pick someone else to ensure his life would be spared and he did understand.
#amok time#T'Pring i s....T'Pring she....-puts my head through a wall-#PLEASE read under the cut for my rambling about T'Pring in amok time pleasepleaseplease#tired of 'T'Pring is evil/a bitch' and VERY uninterested in 'T'Pring is a girlboss'#T'Pring is a person in a society which doesn't think she has the right to make her own choices who's in [love] with a man who [loves] her#back in what I'd like to think is implied to be a slightly subversive way in its mutual and fervent nature (whether the writers thought#this was a good or bad thing - who knows. We know better RIGHT??)#and yes I will stylize T'Pring's hair differently every single time I draw it HEHEHE#star trek tos#Spock#T'Pring#also of COURSE something something spock/kirk & stonn/t'pring parallels: To keep your beloved safe you have to force someone else to kill#theirs - not BC you hate him (you don't) but you don't love him either and why does HE get to have you even if you don't want him?? Why doe#he get to 'give' you to the person YOU chose?? It's not a hatred on a person level (which I wanted to portray with the 'brothers') portion#but a sort of societal embodying.#I will think about T'Pring not wanting to be 'the consort of a legend' every damn day !!!#They really could have laid it on thick in making her evil guys...T'Pau even makes a comment about Spock's 'vulcan blood is thin'#but all T'Pring says is that Spock is a legend and she doesn't want that for her life. She wants Stonn.#And you're gonna sit there and you're gonna tell her that she's wrong!??? Spock doesn't even want to be with her!! Why is she so hated!?#CAN WE FREE MY GIRL??? She did all that but it's being read in the worst faith possible!!#comix page#bea art tag#star trek art#She literally says the word 'FREE'...she's TRAPPED!!!
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You know, these past two episodes I was thinking to myself, Su Yin is almost perfect in every way, simply the ideal devoted, protective, loyal, dedicated sworn brother, call him Da-ge indeed!!!, but my one piece of constructive criticism is that he needs to learn how to give real hugs - he does a lot of manful shoulder clasping, but Xiaobao is a shivering chihuahua desperately in need of cuddles and body heat, you gotta HUG THAT BOY - but now I see that Su Yin's hugs are simply reserved for his horrible little gremlin of an imperial cousinwife.
#myatb#myatb spoilers#meet you at the blossom#lol jinbao zhaocai and su yin are all canonically part of xiaobao's nuclear family...#and all of them get horrible boyfs of their very own!#no sibling rivalry needed! husband destroyers for all#(zhaocai i'm manifesting this for you offscreen dw you're still included)#shaoyu thinks he's in a palace drama and xiaobao is the lowly concubine he can trample all over to his indomitable empress#baby you're not empress yet. wait for emperor your cousin to marry you first... or i guess to become emperor yourself if that ever happens#anyway i am making a micro post instead of trying to capture all the things i've been loving about these episodes#but i REALLY REALLY LOVE THIS SHOW!!!#i hate when the episodes end! give me more right now!!!#jinbao is number one at serving!!! of course random men would immediately want to possess him - he gets it!!!!#and ep7 but xiaobao is obvi very preoccupied by his whump but relieved madam jin at least is still thinking of her daughter as family#and i appreciate that su yin despite being so obvi in love w/ xiaobao isn't actually interested in forcing him to not feel what he feels#for huaien. he just wants him to be well. will he be angry when xiaobao hops right back into this guy's arms in a few weeks? idk!#but for right now it's nice to see him nonjudgmentally assuring him he doesn't have to magically stop feeling things for this guy#oh and xiaobao like 'i will be good from now on. i will just sit depressed in my room.' OWWIE#and practicing looking cheerful for his mom and dad in the mirror. OWWIE OWWIE!!!#dear diary
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OBSESSED with the weird dynamic between Ayden and Emhira. The dawnfather and the Matron of ravens, "you cannot heal everything" Vs the constant attempt to do so. The dawnfather says I love you all, clarifying this sentiment in such a moment of division and LOOKS at her last, separating her from the all? Or making sure she knows she is included? And what is reeling me is that a very long time from now, when the gods will have returned to the eternal beings they are, they will each choose a twin as their champion. Does the dawnfather choose Vex as a response to the matron choosing Vax, is it just that they cannot help but being parallels, life and death always circling each other. Now that I think about it , Whitestone is obviously a big worshipper of Pelor with the suntree being a symbol of him and life itself and the de rolos if I remember correctly also worshipped the matron. It's just so interesting to see all these connections that have always existed but have not yet existed.
#I am wowed by how Nick and Laura are playing them#like wow that is not only talent that's just something else on another level#I love that they sat beside each other so we can also witness the choices they make physically#like the matron shying away from his declaration? pheraps being uncomfortable with it#but really so many things that come into play when you assign a mortal vessel to them both#the fact they smiled when they recognised each other#like ' yes of course you are here'#recognition and reaffirmation through the other#and I also think they are both the youngest if I am not mistaken#which is interesting all on its own#cr downfall#critical role#exu downfall
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every time I hear someone say "oh you have to listen to Dear Evan Hansen it has such good mental health representation" I cry in Next to Normal
#next to normal#and yes this is based on a true story#generally I dont try to juck anyones jum so I of course didn't tell that person what I was thinking at that moment#and if someone found Dear Evan Hansen a useful text in terms of their own mental health journey who am I to discredit that#but this is the internet and I am back on the ntn train#in a way it is my saf autumn musical#and yes I am a survior of the 2017 Tony Awards why were you asking?#no but seriously#it is so interesting how many narrative devices Dear Evan Hansen took from Next to Normal#but turned them into a less complete piece#like Gabe in ntn is a representation of unadressed grief and trauma and the family has to accept that he will never be really gone#and connor is just...idk not fully thought out?#idk I'm rambling#but also#how the love story between Henry and Natalie means something#Natalie sees her parent's relationship and desperately doesn't want that for herself and Henry at the same time also stand for#a piece of normalcy that seems attainable#you don't sit there and think hu why is there this completely separate love story thrown in there?#it mirrors the problems#and dear evan hansen#do I even have to say it#I thnk the thing I resent it most for is that it has a love story#naja#I'm of listening to net to normal some more#sorry I someone who really likes deh stumbles accross this#I feel like espechially musicals can be something that can be so personal#and I don't actually want to contribute to more stuff like#ew why do you like this when theres xyz that is so much better or morally purer or whatever#I guess what I do want to say is: if I had a nickle for everytime they made a musical about mental health where theres a ghost on stage and#the sister of the dead kid falls in love with a funny guy while her family is falling apart
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Fiona and Cake spoilers seriously
(Something I noticed abt Betty and Simons relationship)
I love Betty and Simon’s relationship, I think their back story is so cute and romantic and all that lovely stuff don’t get me wrong.
But there’s this under tone of Betty constantly giving things up for Simon and we don’t really talk about it a lot???
Like, Betty let Simon have his moment with the artifact and the pubic, she also doesn’t go to her trip in favor of going on an expedition with Simon. Then when she goes to leave again she stays for Simon.
Even Fiona is like “you went with her on the bus?” And Simon just looks all confused like “what? No, why would I do that?” Like- hello???
Then after that she gave up her entire life and mind to get Simon back to the point where she literally says “I don’t know who I am without him anymore.” And that just sucks! Since the beginning Betty has been the one giving up the most, her mind, her own possible career, and it’s a story of love of course and it’s very sweet but it’s also a story of sacrifice.
Their love wasn’t a perfect solution, it was already sort of imbalanced when it started and I lowkey love how we see those cracks even before they’re together.
Again, I love their relationship and I think it’s sweet. I just think we should talk about Betty’s side more, especially when she tells a story of what most women do in relationships, sacrifice.
#fiona and cake spoilers#fiona and cake#simon petrikov#betty grof#It made itself really apparent in these newest episodes and I couldn’t stop thinking abt it#like Betty idolized Simon before they formally met so of course she was gonna drop everything to go on that expedition with him#but it was more after that too like she was going to leave to study in Australia but Simon stopped her#and Betty’s a grown woman she can make her own decisions#but even Betty’s friend was like ‘don’t make her miss the bus!’ because Betty had a real opportunity to do something else#and maybe It’s that true love trumps all or what ever but the way they frame it in the show feels weird to me#like Why have Fiona ask if Simon got on the bus with Betty if it wasn’t important???#the way Simon responds feels weird too he responds like Fiona doesn’t make sense when asking that question#BUT ITS VALID Like why wouldn’t you encourage Betty to go off and maybe start her own career??#or just go with her?? like she gave up stuff to go on your exhibition why wouldn’t you return the favor???#and obviously Simon doesn’t do this on purpose I’m not saying he did#he didn’t guilt trip or force Betty or even ask her to give up these things to be with him Betty did all that on her own#i think it’s just interesting the way the show frames their relationship#like Betty gives up a lot to be with Simon in Fiona and Cake and in adventure time too#but she idolizes Simon and after Simon becomes IK she’s chasing after the man he used to be#meanwhile everyone learns to live with who IK is now it was just Betty who was clinging to Simon the whole way through#obviously they love each other and respect each other but I think Betty idolizing Simon didn’t just stay when they were kids#or college students or what ever it keto’s going even when the world ended and Simon became Ice King#this is was so much more than I planned on writing-
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On the topic of Sebastian and touch
I'm kind of projecting but when I was a kid I used to be super volatile about touching. Like blind rage kind of thing
So I was thinking about Sebastian maybe having something similar
Giving this fish the pain of hurting those he loves because he can't stand being touched
oh for sure
though i am under the impression that he has the self control not to legitimately hurt hurt the ones he's closest to (if a random tried anything he'd start swinging), he is deeply disturbed and short-fused about it. of course it's all stemming from a deep-rooted trauma but he himself kinda struggles to recognize that, instead immediately going down the "oh my god i'm a horrible person i'm everything they told me i was i'm an irredeemable monster" spiral
if he ever was to physically injure someone he loved i don't think he'd ever forgive himself (privately)
top 10 things that happen to your psyche when you've been nothing but dehumanized for more than a decade
#like it's one thing to murder a shitton of randos#you also have to consider his environment at the time#he was stuck in Survival Mode#quite literally a caged animal with very little time to spare#so his actions can logically be justified in his own mind to an extant#but after that?? inexcusable#of course it can STILL be justified and Loved One can reassure him all day long#but convincing him is a whole other thing#pressure roblox#roblox pressure#sebastian solace
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I LOVE LOVE LOVE UR DARK ZACK AU!!! everything i’ve seen about it so far just has me so !!!! its so good. and would love to hear more about it :)
ooooooughhh dark!zack my darling sweetie angel love of my life
admittedly i don't have much of a plot going for them rn LOL just jingling them like keys in my brain
It's a Zack who decided he's sick of being a doormat. Being friendly and giving people the benefit of the doubt is what led to Shinra ripping away the most formative years of their lives.
For a long time, Zack tried to uphold his code of ethics, in spite of all the violence. At first he told himself it was just to protect Cloud... but over time, the more people he had to kill, the more it dawned on him that they will never be able to return to a normal life.
Once he stopped trying to make excuses, he found himself quite enjoying his new identity as a terrifying ex-SOLDIER fugitive. Things are much simpler now that he's free of moral obligations! People finally take him seriously, nobody bosses him around, he has control and it's SO addicting.
Now don't get him wrong, he's not a psycho killer, he just... happens to, um, murder people that get in his way.
#maybe that's what he's been working towards this whole time. on a subconscious level....#he wanted to reach 1st class so bad. telling himself it was because he wanted to be a hero#but in reality it's because he wanted to be in control. he wanted power.#not necessarily power over people; but power over his circumstances. the power to change things and write his own destiny.#of course once he does finally get promoted he has long since realized that SOLDIER is a trap.#every other 1st before him has sacrificed their entire lives. everything they love for nothing in return. no wonder he isn't thrilled.#cloud's a whole nother can of beans and i gotta cultivate my mental fungus about him still#asks#dark!zack au#<33
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do you know what's great about a ship with such depth of record? you're still stumbling over new content years after the fact. anyway here's what david ferrer's face looks like when he's getting a hug from his special friend at a davis cup anniversary celebration in 2010.
#david ferrer#juan carlos ferrero#thinking about the takeout analogy. the thing is there's a fine line between ease of consumption and satisfaction of production.#ideally you have enough food to be full but not so much that you can no longer savor the deliciousness of each dish#the cook's artisanal touch... the unique flavor profile... the element of culinary surprise...#farm-to-table ferruero#relatedly i also love berrypicking irl. and visiting the local harvest-your-own-veggies farm.#the fedal caterer on speed dial does provide some amazing meals tho.#sincaraz is you go to a normal-looking restaurant then the chef (carlos alcaraz) comes out to force-feed you a 12 course banquet.#hey can you tell it's been a long day at work. i'm hungry.#made in valencia#<- official mapa label
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