#OOH I should do a POLL too... let me figure out what it should be

[statementlou]

Thinking again about how the other day that anon wrote me wondering why Louis was so popular with older adult women and I had a couple ideas but was basically like idk IS he or is it just the same amount as any other pop star but then the other day BBC posted that video of 1D members doing 1D songs* solo without Louis in it and the post was like go comment on all these platforms and I was like what the heck it's not like I use my facebook for much else- but that meant I ended up looking a few times at the other comments (being mad about Louis' exclusion) and like I KNOW it's FB so ofc it's skewed by who uses that... but like damn, there ARE a lot of middle aged and older ladies for Louis! Like A LOT!! So again I am thinking about it and I would love to know what other people think might be the reason... my ideas plus footnote under cut-

~He’s so fucking SMART and the older you get the more appealing and necessary that is to appreciate someone. ~His music has always been in large part 90s style stuff which may draw in folks who already loved that kind of music because they’re old enough to remember it. ~We’re queer and were drawn into this fandom by crying our eyes out over how beautiful baby Harry and Louis were together and wanted to give them the world and protect them (is this age dependent? see below for why maybe I guess but idk) But my top theory is that ~it's based on the combination of him being this beautiful goodhearted boy all the shitty things we saw happening to him for so long and wanting so much to be able to DO SOMETHING, to make things better for him and give him everything. Not saying this is age based but maybe this works more strongly on older folks than on people who feel like they are in the same boat? Anyway would love to hear if other people think 1) there are more older louies than other celeb fandoms/ the other members of 1Ds solo fandoms and 2) if so what do you think it is about Louis? or 3) no, all these things apply to me but I'm only (whatever young age) so that can't be it

*I have since figured out why they did that and it isn't because Louis is blacklisted or whatever it's because they just pulled their footage that they own of 3 of them playing BBC Big Weekend which Louis hasn't done, and footage of Zayn from his public insta, which isn't something they could do for Louis- to include him they would have had to like get footage from his management or something they can't just use whatever off youtube and it was just a silly SM post they weren't gonna do all that

[bibbawrites]

Don’t Touch - Charlie Gillespie x Reader (18+)

Request: Hi!! Can you please do one about Charlie doing ‘no nut November’ and you not knowing... maybe him and Owen made a secret bet about it?? 

Word Count: 1274 words

Summary: you find out that your boyfriend Charlie is trying to complete no nut November, and you decide to try and mess with him 

Warnings: sexual content, teasing, implied sex, swearing

A/N: not my greatest work but also not my worst, this was the most voted for in my poll, getting 52% of the votes  hopefully you guys enjoy this ! sorry for any typos, i didn’t properly edit it lol i was feeling lazy also really sorry if the formatting is fucked up, idk what’s going on but random spaces kept appearing while i was writing it, i think i got rid of them all but i cant be certain lol  and please do not post it anywhere else, thank you! 

Tag List:  @happinessinthedarkesttimes​ @littlemissaddict​ @vicesvsvirtuesfanfic​ @headheartbellarke​ @lovesanimals​ @bartok-the-magnificent​ @juliefromaustralia @multi-universe21 @rangerelik @kaitieskidmore1 @katrina765​

Sav sent a message to Girls Only! Sav y/n !!! Sav boy do i have some news for you Sav some very... interesting news Y/N ooh i love news Madi ooh tea time???

Tori i’m here what’s happening Sav just overheard your dumbass boyfriend and his equally stupid best friend discussing a bet Y/N oh really? do tell Sav did you know he’s doing no nut november Jadah ew Madi ewwwwwwwwww no did not need to know that

Tori and i’m leaving  Y/N i did not Y/N although that explains why he didn’t wanna have sex last night Madi oop Jadah stop this is tmi Carolynn oh god what have i walked in on? Madi can you have this conversation somewhere else please i do not want to think about charlie like this Sav then just don’t Sav too lazy to move chats Jadah just don’t say too much then Y/N wonder why he didn’t tell me Sav who knows Sav figured you didn’t know when you hadn’t mentioned it to me Carolynn sav you are far too involved in y/n and charlie’s sex life Sav that’s how you know it’s a true friendship Madi so how are we gonna get back at them Madi we are getting back at them, right? Y/N charlie at least Y/N unless one of y’all is prepared to fuck with owen Madi i’m a child Carolynn i’m married Jadah also a child

Tori no thank you Sav no. Y/N i said fuck with, not fuck lol, y’all could just prank him or something

Y/N anyways i have a plan

Y/N but it’s not for little ears

Y/N care, tori do you wanna know or?

Tori no thanks lol

Carolynn i’m okay, good luck though x

Y/N ty x

Y/N sav, to our private chat

- 

Sav sent a message to Y/N

Sav spill

Y/N okay so

Y/N i’m gonna make him regret it

Sav as you should

Y/N i’m thinking get sexy, pull out the good wine and seduce the shit outta him

Sav want me to distract owen?

Y/N that would be really appreciated

Sav done, dinner and a movie give you enough time?

Y/N that’s perfect thank you

Y/N i owe you

Sav don’t mention it

Sav besides, gonna make owen pay for everything as his punishment for getting involved

Sav so i’m the real winner

Y/N i love that for you

Y/N okay i’m gonna go get sexy

Sav good luck! i expect a full report tomorrow

Y/N of course

Y/N love you x Sav love you too x

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Two hours later it was finally time to begin your plan. You had put on some natural, yet sexy makeup, Charlie’s favourite set of lingerie and one of his cut off shirts to cover it, although cover was probably not the right word to describe how much of the lingerie the shirt showed.  “Hey baby.” Charlie called, entering your shared bedroom and flopping down onto the bed. “You look nice, what’s the occasion?”  “No occasion, just wanted to surprise you.” You replied, straddling his hips. You lent down to kiss him, but he turned his head so that you kissed his cheek.  “I’d love to baby but I’m so tired.” Charlie rubbed your hip slightly. “Maybe later.”  “Oh okay.” You replied, not deterred. You knew this wasn’t going to be easy.  “Actually I might take a nap if that’s okay.” He decided.  “Of course babe.” You lent down to kiss him, before climbing off him, moving in a way so that he would get a full view of your body under his shirt. Charlie bit his lip, and you grinned to yourself slightly as you left the room. This was gonna be good.

- 

Just over an hour later Charlie entered the living room, where you had been sitting, waiting for him to wake up. 

“Feeling better?” You questioned, looking up at him. He nodded.  “Much. Where’s Owen?”  “With Sav. They went to the movies or something like that.” You replied, pretending that you were unsure of your best friend’s plans. “Oh okay.” Charlie sat down on the couch and you quickly moved to straddle his lap, snuggling into him, your face pressed into his neck. He wrapped his arms around you, freezing when his hand brushed against your hip. “Y/N.” He asked slowly. You hummed in response, your lips grazing his neck slightly. “Why aren’t you wearing underwear?” His voice wobbled and you bit back a smile. “Didn’t feel like it.” You replied nonchalantly. 

“You didn’t...” He swallowed. “You didn’t feel like it?” 

You shook your head, grinning to yourself when you felt him harden underneath you. 

You sat up, causing friction between your crotches and pretended to look concerned when Charlie flinched slightly.

“You okay baby? You look a bit flustered.” You asked, secretly proud of how worried you sounded. Charlie nodded slightly. 

“I’m fine.” He mumbled. “Still tired I guess.” 

“Want me to make you a coffee?” You asked, pressing your lips to his neck softly. 

“Actually I might go buy us dinner. Indian okay?” He questioned, practically pushing you off his lap. You giggled slightly, watching him pull his shoes on in record time. 

“Sounds delicious.” You said, licking your lips. Charlie’s eyes widened, and with a quick nod he rushed out the front door, leaving you to giggle over how well this was going. 

- 

By the time Charlie arrived home you had thought of a whole new plan. Charlie had entered the room, food in hand and brought it into the living room, not even pausing to take his shoes off. He sat down on the couch with a sigh. Time to put the plan into action. 

“Here, let me help you.” You dropped to your knees in front of him, looking up at him through your lashes to see his reaction. You untied his shoes quickly, putting them to the side before grabbing onto his thigh to help yourself up, making sure to squeeze just enough.  

“Why are you doing this?” Charlie asked, and you frowned, pretending that you didn’t know what he was referring to. 

“Doing what baby?” You questioned, your voice soft. Charlie shook his head. 

“Being so sexual all of the sudden. It’s like you’re-” He stopped, eyes widening in realisation. “You know, don’t you?” 

“Know what?” You feigned confusion. 

“About the bet, with Owen. To see who can do no nut November longer. That’s why you’re acting like this, you’re trying to get me to break.” He said, and you smiled sweetly. 

“Hmm yeah maybe a little birdy told me.” You sung, and Charlie groaned. 

“Owen?” He guessed. You shook your head. 

“Nope.” 

“Savannah.” He stated, and you nodded. A disgusted look came over his face. 

“Ew, is Savannah trying to get Owen to lose the bet?” He asked and your eyes widened. 

“Oh god no, gross, I’d never make her do that.” You exclaimed. “Your punishment was being teased, Owen’s was paying for Sav’s dinner and a movie.” 

Charlie looked relieved. 

“So if you know, and Sav knows, I assume she’s gonna confront Owen at some point?” He paused and you nodded. “So the bet is off then?” 

“You lasted four days, I think that’s good enough.” You agreed. He stood up, grabbing you and lifting you so that you wrapped your legs around his waist. 

“Perfect.” He whispered, crashing his lips into yours. You pulled away and he whined. 

“What about our food?” You questioned, looking down at the white plastic bag on the coffee table. 

“We’ll microwave it.” Charlie said, before carrying you to the bedroom so that he could officially lose the bet. 

- 

Y/N sent a message to Sav

Y/N mission successful ;) 

[honey-coloured-passion]

Surprise! (Sapnap x Reader)

Request: “Sapnap X Reader where he surprises the reader while she’s streaming”

Words: 1.5k

“Hello chat how are your days going? Good, bad? Finals!? Oh my gosh I hate finals dude I’m so sorry f to pay respects,” you paused to stretch and adjust your headset as you had just started your stream. “I’m kinda just bored today chat so what should we do? Mods can you all run a poll or something?” You glanced at your discord and saw messages from Sap.

“Hey angel!”

“Oh you’re streaming!”

“You look cute on stream” 

You rolled your eyes but chat caught you blushing and saw that Sapnap was viewing the stream, and immediately lost it. They’d been shipping the two of you for months, but little did they know you guys had been dating for three months, since you met up in person for the first time. It hadn’t felt like the right time to announce to the world and you’d wanted to establish your relationship privately before telling the fans, but that didn’t mean you’d had a couple slip ups leading the fans to theorize. 

This included you calling Sapnap various forms of babe, bubs, Nick, love etc. Same went for Sap who gets teased for endlessly rushing to your defense on the SMP and responding casually when you call him a pet name, almost like he does it all the time... yeah, chat was on to the two of you. 

“Shut up guys and tell me what we’re doing today! We could go grind netherite tools and chill? How does that sound?” the SMP always got a resounding yes, and just like that you were off, the SMP had won the poll anyways. 

You messaged Sap in discord, “wanna call for the stream?” and quickly he was on the call with you. 

“Hello Mr. Sapitus Napitus, how’s your day going on this fine Friday?” you laughed as you ran through the nether, having just collected enough wool and planks to make beds. “It’s going, I was bored as heck so I wound up here, what about you?” You knew the longer end to that story, his family was out and he thought editing would take longer but now he was stuck at home. “Same same, I’m chillin and got bored after scrolling on Tiktok for like two hours so now I’m here!” You moved on, blowing up the nether hunting for netherite scrap while talking with chat.

A familiar notification went off, “water check from, um ,GogySupremacy420,000, oh my god what a username. Alright everyone drink some water! This is good I haven’t drank water since like breakfast.” you heard Sap pipe up, “you’ve eaten since breakfast right?” you rolled your eyes, “nope I’ll eat after stream don’t worry Simpnap” tacking on the nickname earned a scoff from the simp himself. “Not a simp,” he answered, giving you a punch in the game making you hit him back. After a mini fight ending in you threatening to place a bed and effectively kill the both of you, you were back to mining. 

“Hey I’ve gotta go drive and grab something want me to stay on call though?” your head whipped to discord to look for another message, knowing Sap didn’t have anywhere to be tonight. But there was nothing. “Oh I don’t mind, chat and I enjoy your company!” you said with a grin. You’d made it to enchanting now, having found all the netherite you needed.

As you sat on the spider spawner you heard Sap get in the car, the familiar beep of him unlocking his car and the revving of the engine making you laugh, “you’re car is literally so old I’m surprised it starts,” you heard Sapnap scoff, “old?! don’t you dare speak to her like that, she’s beautiful,” you rolled your eyes, Callahan who must’ve been on your stream quickly piped up in the game chat “Y/n is jealousss!” now it was your turn to be offended, “you think I’d be jealous of a bucket of rusty bolts and oil? No chance,” you laughed, checking chat as they were spamming JealousChamp. “Whatever you say ba- Y/n,” Sapnap played it off with a cough and you quickly changed the subject to how much XP you would need for all your tools. 

“Hey I’ve gotta go on deafen real quick be back soon!” Sap’s voice flooded your mic, he must’ve brough the mic close to his mouth because his smooth and deep voice curled around the mic perfectly, sending shivers down your spine as his warm tone filled your headphones. “B-bye” you choked out, pretending to adjust your headset as you continued killing mobs. “So chat, got any questions to pass this alone time?” you watched the chat speed up, hoping your mods would filter out poor questions. “Favorite. color? Easy who knows? Yup! You guys know me too well. Ooh favorite fast food place? This is hard cuz I don’t wanna say something you all don’t know but I can tell you guys my McDonalds order because it’s immaculate. Do I know Sapnap’s order? This is a good test you guys, I’m pretty sure it’s like an ungodly amount of spicy McChickens and a Dr. Pepper but I swear he changes it like every day.” you laughed, reading out other people’s orders then moved to debating if the icecream machine is actually broken or if the workers are just lazy. They’re lazy, confirmed by workers in chat apparently. 

“I’m back but I have to go in like five minutes, did you miss me?” Sap’s voice flooded your headphones again. As you adjusted his volume you teased, “hmm nope!” to which he began pouting making you laugh at his “baby rage”. Just as you were finishing with enchants on your axe he had to go. “Don’t miss me too much I’ll talk to you later, chat behave yourself I know you all will miss me but just leave y/n open in a muted tab,” he teased making you roll your eyes, “whatever we’re gonna have a super secret conversation after you’re gone about how we only let you on the stream out of pity right chat?” you couldn’t stop smiling and laughing through the teasing. “Okay okay, I actually gotta go, see you soon,” you bid Sapnap farewell and returned to joking with chat, turning on media share to pass some time as you reacted to animatics, hilarious compilations, and the occasional y/n x sapnap video making chat light up as you laughed through the videos. 

As you watched the videos and killed cave spiders you got a text from Sapnap. 

You still streaming?

Yup! Where’d you end up going? you replied.

Open your door and find out

Your breath hitched. “One- one minute chat,” you pulled your headset off and heard a small rustling in your hallway. As soon as you tabbed out of the game you stood up, rushing off camera to fling your door open and,

There he was. His smile was infectious and you couldn’t help yourself from screaming and running into his open arms. As he held you, rocking back and forth, you heard him mumbled. “I missed you”  Into your ear while you clung to him. “I missed you more,” you whispered back, Finally, you released him enough to peck his lips, unable to wipe the grin from your face. “I got food cuz you said you didn’t eat and I figured if I had time I wanted to spend it with you!” your heart practically melted, taking a bag of food in one hand and holding Sapnap’s hand with your other you realized you forgot to mute or end stream.

“Um, so I’m still streaming... what do we do?” you glanced up nervously but Sapnap just started laughing, “oh my god I guess I can say hi so chat doesn’t lose it’s mind,” you swallowed nervously, glancing down at your phone you had been tagged in endless clips of you running off camera then screaming about 15 seconds later. “Yeah better give them an answer,” you giggled.

Rushing back to your setup you saw chat blowing up as you put your headset back on. “Heyyy guys! So yeah, um I guess I can just show you that, we have a special guest!” You gestured to Sapnap to come into frame, pulling up a chair as he sat down next to you. “Yeah I gave y/n a visit cuz I was bored. Hi chat, hello, hello! You guys are going really fast dang,” Sapnap gripped your hand under the table, you squeezed back, leaning into his embrace. “So um, I think Sap and I are gonna hangout, right?” you glanced at him and he nodded, he really hadn’t stopped smiling since he got to your place. “Yup! Maybe if there’s time we’ll go live again I’m not sure! Kinda spur of the moment yeah?” you finished your thought. Saying goodbye to chat you ended stream just a few minutes later.

“We’ve really gotta tell people soon, I wanna be able to hold your hand on camera not just off,” Sapnap said between bites of food. “Yeah, I think it’ll be okay right?” You had always been nervous about stans hating you or people trying to get in between your relationship. “As long as I’ve got you I’m more than fine, I’m- I don’t know I guess I’m pogchamp,” you shook your head, “god you are such a dork,” Sapnap scrunched his nose with a laugh, “I’m your dork though so I’m so special!” and you couldn’t agree more. <3

[poesparakeet-fics]

AKA “Yasha The Protector” fic from the prompt poll!

Note: This is basically a SFW fic with a lil NSFW ending. The whole SFW bit is here, so enjoy, and click to AO3 for the sexy bit!

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Critical Role (Web Series) Rating: Explicit Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: The Poly Nein - Relationship, Beauregard Lionette/Caleb Widogast/Yasha, Beauregard Lionett/Yasha, Poly Nein Characters: Beauregard Lionett, Caleb Widogast, Yasha (Critical Role) Additional Tags: Tickling, Bedtime, gang tickle, Sub Caleb Widogast, Stress Relief, dope monk shit, Nipple Play, Cunnilingus, Polyamory, Group Sex, Threesome - F/F/M Series: Part 1 of The Poly Nein Summary:

Trent Ikithon has been brought back into the Mighty Nein’s orbit, and Yasha’s real mad about it. After Jester take Caleb to her bed to take care of his feelings, Yasha does the same to keep him safe. Beau… helps?

FICThe Empire and the Dynasty needed to figure their stuff out. They needed to take all their stuff, and just... lay it out on the table, measure it, and figure it out. That’s what Yasha thought, anyway. She supposed that these talks might be their way of doing it, but it sure was a bad way.  At the very least she wished the Mighty Nein could stop getting mixed up in it.

When Yasha first saw that Trent Ikithon had manipulated his way onto the king’s party, she’d been tempted to bamf out her wings and scream in his face, right then and there. He was old, she suspected she could maybe stop his heart that way. But she’d felt Beau go still next to her, hard and poised like a switch, and paused to match instead.

The last night before their departure they’d set up the mansion in a rented room far from the castle.

Fjord was sure Ikithon had done it to force Caleb to interact with him. Caleb agreed, in that quiet way he did when he was thinking very hard, his eyes cast down.

“We should kill him while we have the chance.” Veth said. She didn’t shriek it like she might have done a year ago, but says it matter-of-factly, in the calm, sweet voice that always meant she was talking to Caleb. They were all talking, but what she said was meant for Caleb.

“No.” He says. “Peace is worth the wait.”

Nobody was willing to argue with him on it, but she could tell Beau and Veth both wanted to. When they all bundled off to bed, Jester intercepted Caleb and pulled him into her and Fjord’s room. Caleb went along numbly, only smiling a little when she insisted that he wouldn’t have nightmares if he slept with them.

Yasha was tense all night, sleeping with Beau weaved around her rigid form like willow reeds.

The talks the next day were very boring. Lots of people she didn’t care about talked. Trent talked occasionally, but only when called upon. Otherwise he would just whisper behind his hand. Fjord talked. Caleb talked. Jester even talked a little, defusing a heated exchange with spun-sugar grace.

Yasha didn’t talk. She stood directly behind Caleb, though, staring down Trent and his molefuckers. Throughout the day she tried to convey three things to them with just her eyes:

She wanted to rip their limbs off.

She was fully capable of ripping their limbs off.

The only reason she was not ripping their limbs off was because Caleb asked her not to.

Beau, on the other hand, roved around the room like a shadow, but her head was always turned in Trent’s direction.

The others seemed happy with how the talks had gone. The fortress they were in had rooms for them, but they all agreed to set up the mansion in one of them as an extra layer of protection. Yasha trotted to catch up with Beau, one hand reaching out to brush her arm.

“Hmm. What? Sorry.”

“That’s OK.” Yasha soothed “It’s been a long day. Um… so... I want Caleb to come sleep with us tonight?”

Beau looked a little surprised. “Uh, sure, but why? I’m not as good at feelings as Jester or Fjord.”

Yasha patted her arm. “You’re getting better. But it’s not about feelings! I want to make sure if some vole-fucker wants to show up next to his bed they get a big raging surprise.” 

Beau snickered and Yasha beamed, pleased with the success of her joke.

“God, you’re so cute. Also, uh... very correct. I was worried about that too,” said Beau with a frown, "If they wanna try and take him out, we'll beat them right out of the pocket dimension."

They were all quiet and tired when they stepped into the mansion, Caleb most of all. Yasha wasn’t as persuasive or cajoling as Jester, so she settled for just grabbing Caleb out of the air as they floated up through the tower’s floors and carrying him to their room over her shoulder.

“Oof! Ah, Yasha…?”

“You’re not sleeping alone with him so near. You’re coming with us.”

“Oooh, good idea Yasha!” Jester’s voice carried down to them as she floated past. “Byyye Caleb!”

“Well, ja, alright then.” Caleb sounded too tired to argue.

“We’ll keep you safe.” Yasha assured him quietly as she gave him a pat on the butt. She didn’t put him down until they were in their room and she could dump him directly on the bed. Then she slipped the Magician's Judge underneath the frame. 

“I need a bath before bed because I smell! Get comfy though, I’ll join you soon.” 

Once she’d stripped down next to the always-steaming copper tub she turned around, surprised to see Caleb sitting on the ground pulling books out of his bag.

“Do you want a bath too Caleb? You can come in with me, you’re just little. Beau fits.”

Caleb gave her a quirk of a smile.

“No, thank-you. I’m just restless. I’ll work for a while before bed, I think.”

“Caleb!” Yasha’s brow furrowed. This was not good. Jester would never allow this, if she was the one taking care of him. 

He shrugged. “I’ll stay here, if they attack I’ll be safe. You'll wake.”

“That’s not what she’s worried about, dumbass.” Beau joined them, a wine bottle under her arm and three glasses in her hand. “It’s late, this thing starts early tomorrow, and you’re the Bright Queen’s favorite human. You need to be sharp. You’re drinking this wine with us and you’re going to bed.”

“Verdammt noch mal , I’m manipulating countries by day and being put to bed like a child every night. Would you all let me be?!” Caleb snapped.

Yasha’s hands moved to her hips. 

“You don't get put to bed like a child, you get taken care of by people who love you because we can't trust you to take care of yourself! And we’re here to protect you, even if it’s from the stupid part of your brain that’s too smart!” Oh, no, that hadn’t come out the way she wanted.

Caleb’s posture turned surly, but Beau stepped between them. 

“Babe, relax, I’ve got this. Take your bath.”

She had him down in a matter of about six seconds. 

First she reached out and seemed to only touch him in the centre of his chest. Yasha barely had time to notice that she’d undone the buckle of his holsters before he was being spun around by a steely hand on the back of his coat-collar.

Beau yanked his coat off in on swift movement, her other hand immediately grabbing the back of Caleb’s holsters and yanking them down to his elbows. She tugged the books out and set them aside while twisting the leather straps into a makeshift binding for his arms. She shoved him face-first onto the bed, straddling his thighs.

Yasha clapped when it was finished, having crawled into the hot bath to enjoy the show.

“Beauregard! Let me go. Now.” Caleb snapped

“Nope.” Beau tugged at his holsters until she could roll him onto his side, one clawed hand starting to scrub at his belly without so much as a glance. Caleb’s body spasmed, his breath pitching as he tried to resist laughing and keep a glare on his face. “There’s only three ways this ends for you. One, you give up, have a nice glass of wine and go to bed in the strong goth’s arms with me. Two, you use your safeword so I have to let you go and you can run off into a corner with your books like a pissy little bitch. Three, I personally tickle you until you pass out, which solves my problem anyway. So what’s it gonna be?”

Her hand squeezed his side and started to climb his ribcage, finally breaking the dams of his resistance. His torso was stretched, his ribcage extended by the angle at which the holsters were pinning his arms behind his back, and with Beau’s strong thighs around his center of gravity he couldn’t do much more than squirm. First a smile broke out, then helpless, rumbling laughter.

“FUHUHUCK YOU LIONEHETTE!” He ground out, earning an audience gasp from Yasha. 

There was a stubborn, defiant and mouthy side of Caleb that only Beau seemed to be able to bring out. Often shocking, when Caleb was always so deferent to his lovers. But then, Beau’s relationship with the men in their group tended to be more ‘beloved best friends I share lovers with and also occasionally make out with’ than 'lover.'

“Ooh, mouthy! So, that’s how you wanna do it, huh? Huh?” 

Beau’s hands started to fly, lightning-fast pinches tweaked Caleb’s ribs, sides, hips, armpits and neck faster than he could react.

“Ah- haha, nein! ” for the first time a little desperation entered Caleb’s voice, his defiance wavering just a little under Beau’s onslaught.

“No? Why? Is the little wizard ready for bed yet? Huh?”

Caleb’s face twisted into a furrowed glare over a helpless smile, and he shook his head from where he was currently muffling his laughter against the bedspread. Beau’s hands jumped to his uppermost ribs on each side, a precision attack that made him start thrashing and shouting in Zemnian. Yasha didn’t know what he was saying, but it didn’t sound complementary.

“How bout now, huh? What if I just do this forever? All ribs, all time! You like that, you smart-ass little shit?”

“No! Nohoho! I will gehehehet you!”

“Pfft. How you gonna do that, huh? You can’t cast your little spells while you’re squealing like a lil bitch…”

Yasha finished towelling herself off and flopped onto the bed next to them, putting her face near where Caleb’s was turned and pressed against the sheets before starting to dance her fingers around his neck and ears.

“Y-Yasha! I- Ah! Hahaha- I don’t- don’t feheeheeheel safe!”

“Oh so now Yasha’s here and you think she’s gonna save you? Nuh-uh. Hey babe, wanna see something cool that Dairon taught me?”

“No!” Caleb yelped, but it was muffled because Beau was already turning him onto his stomach. 

“Ooh yes!” Yasha answered, leaning in with her chin on her other hand and continuing to tease the back of Caleb’s neck. Beau’s fingers started to follow the ley-lines of Caleb’s body, applying a poke, a twist or a ground knuckle at the intersections. 

Caleb’s laughter petered into giddy giggles as his body trembled under the ministrations. He could clearly feel the effects of Beau’s work, because the steady whine of “nononononononono” became just a little more frantic with each applied touch, his neck and shoulders squirming and scrunching further to avoid Yasha’s teasing.

“We usually use this to make people’s nervous system more sensitive for interrogation,” Beau explained, “so… well, I guess it might work pretty well, huh? Let’s see!”

She didn’t bother to roll Caleb over this time, instead jamming her hands under his arms from behind to get his armpits and ribs. Every part of Caleb’s body started to shake, and his laughter turned into muffled shrieks.

“Nahahahat there!”

“Um, we already talked about this. It’s ALL ribs, ALL the time.” Beau teased, stepping up the rhythm of her fingers and making Caleb’s hysteria kick up with each word . “Yup, that works. How’s that, tough guy? Still wanna fight?”

She turned him on his side so he could talk, one hand still jammed under his arm. Caleb was red in the face, but he still spit out “Fuck you fuHAHAHAck you fuHAHAck youhooHAHAHA!”

“Caleb! That’s so rude!” Yasha admonished. “And you know what? I’m getting a little hungry.”

Caleb’s eyes widened and his thrashing sped up. Beau looked a little confused, but watched the one-sided exchange with an amused smile on her face.

“Remember in Aeor when you were a big spider? Do you think you’re as tasty now?” She pounced face-down on one of his thighs. “Omnomnomnom!”

Caleb’s squeal started before Yasha’s face got anywhere near him. She placed one hand on his knee and the other on his stomach to keep his body from folding up to block her, worrying both places with gently wiggling fingers. Then she nipped up and down the thigh muscle from hip to knee like it was corn on the cob, and Caleb nearly levitated off the bed. 

“AAaaiiiiii! YAHAHASHA! AAAH! YAHAHASHAHA PLEAAHEEHEEHESE AAAH! UNCLE! UHAHAHANCLE!"

Yasha paused, peering up at him along the length of his body. Beau's fingers stilled too. 

"Are you gonna come to bed?"

"Yehehes,” he wheezed, “yes!"

Yasha backed off. Beau started to, before mischief overcame her and she tweaked Caleb's ribs, making him convulse and scream. 

"Hey!" Yasha warned, pointing at Beau. "He gave. My meal of wizard legs was interrupted, but I'll fill up on monk ribs if I have to."

Caleb made a raspberry sound at Beau from his position in a heap on the mattress. Beau held her hands up in surrender. "Alright! I was just teasing him, no need to get aggressive... Hey, you! You still want some wine?"

She untwisted Caleb’s holsters, setting him free. 

“Yes pl- *hic* please.” Caleb croaked, still catching his breath.

Beau moved to pour the wine-- white, Caleb didn’t like red-- and they all sipped it as they got ready for bed. Once Caleb had stripped and tucked himself under Yasha’s arm with his head on her shoulder, Beau sat behind him. His spine went rigid.

“Relax.” The monk soothed. “I’m done. It only lasts an hour, but we can get rid of it faster.” 

She started to rub Caleb’s back his firm, flat palms, working out muscles, nerves and energy where she had disrupted it to make him more ticklish. Caleb did relax, eyes rolling as his eyes started to flutter closed.

Beau moved to her other side, settling into a position that mirrored Caleb’s. Yasha fell asleep to the sound of their quiet breathing.

[gamerwoo]

EXO: X.O. (Part Eight)

Characters: EXO x reader (gender neutral)

Genre/warnings: dating sim au, interactive au, horror au, but this one isn’t too spooky

Tag list: @fullsun-donghyuck @hyungjunjpg @chanxyeollie @baekwell–tart @mntax @baek-byunies @withoutanyconfidence @exo-chan-kai @squishy-yamdumplings @linophobia @changbinasmr

a/n: lines in italics are what’s in the game! and I know I posted this as soon as I made it buuuut I wanted to give people in timezones ahead of me a better chance to interact w the poll :] 

Previous | Next | X.O. Masterlist

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It was planned for the game to skip forward to the weekend, but you were hardly playing any attention. Your mind was all over the place trying to figure out what could possibly be up with your game, but you couldn’t think of anything. Nothing was crazy enough to keep the game from progressing though, so you let it progress.

As the narration explained that it was now Saturday, and Kyungsoo and Chanyeol had showed up together to work on the project at your house, the scene changed from the one outside the house to a pretty simple-looking bedroom after it said you let them in and led them up to your room to work.

Kyungsoo looked around with a soft smirk.

Kyungsoo: I haven’t seen your bedroom in years. It hasn’t changed much, has it?

Chanyeol: _____ is the same little _____ we’ve always known.

The taller boy tossed an arm around my shoulders, squeezing them in an odd side-hug.

Kyungsoo sat himself down on the carpet on the floor, taking his backpack off of his shoulders.

Kyungsoo: We should get to work. The sooner we get started, the sooner it’ll be done and we can do something else.

_____: I’m gonna go make some snacks real quick. I was busy cleaning before you guys got here.

As Chanyeol sat down across from Kyungsoo, he looked up at me with excitement in his eyes.

Chanyeol: Ooh, snacks?

Kyungsoo: Let’s at least figure out what kind of project we want to do for this first. Then Chanyeol and I can get started.

Chanyeol: I think we should do a poster. It’s standard, easy, and colorful.

Judging from Kyungsoo’s expression, he didn’t agree.

Kyungsoo: That’s what everybody’s going to do. We should do something that stands out more. It’ll get us more points.

Chanyeol scoffed.

Chanyeol: Like what?

Kyungsoo: Power point, oral report, even doing a short film based off the book would be good.

Chanyeol: And oral report? Right, so everybody can sleep through it.

Kyungsoo: It’s better than yet another poster.

Chanyeol: At least a poster can be fun and colorful. Just talking in front of the class is boring.

Their bickering was getting more and more heated, but I wasn’t really sure what to say to calm either of them down. Kyungsoo and Chanyeol were pretty opposite, anyway. Chanyeol was loud and wanted to do classwork the easy way, while Kyungsoo was always more reserved and tended to make sure everything he did was perfect.

But Kyungsoo seemed to remember I was there, because he suddenly looked up at me, gesturing to me with a slight nod of his head.

Kyungsoo: Then we’ll let _____ choose.

Chanyeol whipped around, looking up at me with a frown on his face.

Chanyeol: Yeah, _____ which idea do you like best?

︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵

TAKE THE POLL HERE!!! The poll will close today (10/10) at 8pm EST.

[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 192: The Only Path Forward

Previously on BnHA: Dabi confronted Endeavor and Hawks following Endeavor’s victory over the High Brow Noumu. But then my girl Miruko the rabbit hero showed up, so Dabi fled the scene courtesy of some very familiar black ooze warping. We then cut to the League’s mysterious hideout, where MOTHERFUCKING HAWKS was meeting up with Dabi after the fact to complain that Dabi pulled some bullshit with their AGREED-UPON SECRET PLAN by attacking in the middle of a city with an experimental Noumu. Dabi in turn accused Hawks of playing games because he failed to mention Endeavor would be involved, and he also managed to prevent even a single casualty during the resulting chaos. So neither of them fully trust each other, but in the end Dabi sent Hawks off and agreed to call on him again. We then learned that Hawks is actually working undercover at the request of the police, who need eyes and ears within the League to prevent another disaster like Kamino. Hawks agreed to this knowing it would mean he’d have to make some hard decisions and turn a blind eye to some of the League’s antics. It’s implied he’s feeling guilty over what happened to Endeavor, so I have completed the adoption papers and had them notarized. Oh yeah, and speaking of guilt, for some reason Dabi is standing out looking at the night sky and being weirdly sentimental. So yeah, I basically have no idea who is on whose side at this point, but I’m fucking living for it you guys.

Today on BnHA: The world moves on from this latest incident of high profile villain destruction. Recovery Girl heals Endeavor and Hawks accompanies him to the train station while the two of them discuss the suspiciously coincidental appearance of the Noumu. Hawks manages to dismiss Endeavor’s suspicions, and Endeavor bids him farewell, but not before suggesting that Hawks should find somebody to help him with his investigation. We get an extremely intriguing Hawks flashback and learn that he was groomed to be a hero from childhood due to his talent, but that he never wanted it and longs for the day when society doesn’t need heroes anymore. We then cut to the Todoroki house, where Endeavor greets his three Children With Known Whereabouts and has an unpleasant confrontation with Natsuo, who hasn’t forgiven him despite his seeming change of heart and lets him know that in no uncertain terms. Shouto thoughtfully says that “Endeavor the hero” is amazing, but as far as Endeavor the person goes, his feelings are in line with Natsuo’s. However he wants to see what kind of dad he’ll become from here on out. Endeavor realizes that his new purpose is to secure a good future for his children, and that the only thing he can do is continue to move forward. That night we cut to Deku, who finds himself in a strange dream with his body is covered in black smoke. Shimura and the other OFA users are there as well. And then all of a sudden he’s watching a scene from the past -- All for One standing against his younger brother, the first OFA user.

This chapter is so fucking good and this recap is so fucking long you guys lol. because it’s just so good ahhhhhhh.

(As always, all comments not marked with an ETA are my unspoiled reactions from my first readthrough of this chapter. I’ve read up through chapter 212 now, so any ETAs will reflect that.)

Izuku got the cover of Jump on account of the BnHA movie premiere! congratulations Izuku

and young All Might is in the upper right hand corner looking like a vintage Ken doll as always and weirding me out

I still like young All Might, but idk you guys, there’s just something about the black sclera that just cranks it up to 11 for me. really is a shame that only happens as a result of his injury

and there’s a page with some blurry clips from the movie, and then this awesome color spread celebrating 4 whole years!

it just hit home that I have less than 30 chapters left until I’m all caught up oh shit

fourth popularity poll! YOU CHUCKLEFUCKS BETTER SHOW MIRIO SOME FUCKING RESPECT THIS TIME AROUND YOU HEAR

I see Bakugou is wearing a clip-on tie here. for fuck’s sake you’re sixteen years old learn to tie the damn thing already

what the actual fuck is happening with Todoroki and Deku’s pants. and for once, not Bakugou’s. like seriously what the hell, this is unnerving

okay guys, poll time: which of these hand gestures indicating the number four is most valid. is it Deku’s, even though he’s doing it with both hands and thus arguably indicating the number eight instead? Ochako, who has the opposite problem and is going for a 2+2=4 thing? or Jirou, who opted to be asymmetrical and do three on one hand and one on the other?

why do only the girls have hats. and did Deku really insist on wearing his trademark red sneaks even though they clash so fucking horribly. why did the others allow this to happen

(ETA: you know what, given the outfits they wore during the A Band performance, they probably did not give one single fuck)

anyway, I love this page from the bottom of my heart, but we came here today to learn more about Dabi’s weird angst and to find out how screwed Hawks is and exactly how hot Endeavor is going to be once that scar heals over. so let’s get to this

so now it’s two days later and Endeavor is all healed up thanks to Recovery Girl! the perks of being a U.A. alum and the number one hero whom everyone now loves

oh mama

okay guys but I need someone to tell me right the fuck now how this man still has an eye. and an eyebrow. you’re telling me they could heal the eyeball just fine but not the rest of his face

(ETA: I actually got an ask explaining this, but I haven’t gotten a chance to take another look at the scene where he gets wounded yet. but thank you anon!)

it looks like he actually did lose half of his mustache though omg

anyways I fucking knew he was going to come out of this just unfairly hot. and just fucking look at him. smdh

as for Miruko, she just fucked right out of there to continue doing her thing afterward. lol I’m glad they bothered to tell us but honestly I wasn’t that curious, that’s basically what I assumed already

son of a bitch

dsflhlk okay JUST STOP, Horikoshi. who the fuck do you think you are making Hawks apologize so fucking casually even though we now know that in truth, he actually is responsible on a level Endeavor has no clue about, and actually has some grounds for feeling guilty even though he wasn’t to blame. like, here he is slyly making it out to be an apology for calling that meeting where they got attacked, even though in reality WE KNOW THE TRUTH

speaking of that meeting, I wonder if Endeavor has put the pieces together yet that Something Was Not Quite Right About That

also what the fuck is in this giant wheely suitcase. is it his suit?

anyway, so he’s telling Hawks that his injuries are his own responsibility

and Hawks is all “ooh that’s a good response, can I use it next time I’m injured”

ah here we go

look, Endeavor may be a lot of things, but he’s not stupid

Hawks is all “lmao fuck my life”

well you’ve had two whole days to come up with some kind of story so let’s see what you got. if it were me I’d tie it in to your investigation

he says that they were bound to draw some attention as the #1 and #2 heroes, and they probably just caught the villains’ eye

and he’s thinking to himself that that’s the whole reason why he drew so much attention toward them while they were out, so he’d have an excuse

this sounds considerably less plausible when you just got attacked by a goddamn Noumu though you know. and clearly a new breed of them no less

now Endeavor’s telling him to be careful with his investigation

don’t mind me, I’m just sitting here trying to figure out whether this has a double meaning

probably not -- I did say he wasn’t stupid, but I doubt he’s that smart to have figured the whole thing out either. still, this gave me pause lol

(ETA: yeah, on my second readthrough this just reads to me like “if you ever need backup, call me before you go and do anything stupid.” tsundere affection from someone with almost no prior experience in showing that he cares. I don’t think he has any idea what Hawks is really up to, but I think he has an inkling that there’s more going on than meets the eye, and he wants him to be careful.)

Hawks’s reaction is interesting too

and now he’s grinning in that you-like-krabby-patties-don’t-you-squidward way

he just cares about you and you’re young enough to be his son so he’s looking out for you

SPEAKING OF HIS SON are we gonna get to that anytime soon. is that where you’re headed off to now Endeavor? to be with your family? oh to be a fly on the wall during that meeting. oh wait, we’re reading a manga and I’ll literally get to read all about it in just a couple of pages, probably. fuck yeah

so Hawks says that he’ll be back on the job once all his feathers grow back

“it’ll probably be another day or so” holy shit. that’s some crazy fast recovery time

and now he’s bidding Endeavor farewell

...did Endeavor just adopt Hawks too

(ETA: he sure did. this is not a man who just waves at people. this is a dad wave. it’s weird you guys, it’s so fucking weird, but that’s what it is though! at least that’s how I read it)

don’t tell me I’m gonna have to co-parent this in-over-his-head too-smart-for-his-own-good bird child with the world’s second worst dad (yeah, Overhaul’s still got that #1 on lockdown for the rest of eternity though)

now we’re flashing back to that meeting with the cops when they first told Hawks about the undercover assignment

they’re calling it a “proposal” and Hawks is mildly objecting to that term

(ETA: “despite knowing I can’t possibly refuse.” oh my god I have so many feels for this boy. he has no choice in any of this. I just want to wrap him up and keep him safe and just let him rest and chill out and play video games and eat tacos and not have to worry about villains and secrets and keeping his damn guard up all the time and being discovered or killed or getting someone else killed. HORIKOSHI. PROTECT HIM!!)

the woman says she won’t deny that Hawks coincidentally not being in Kamino worked out well for them

oh shit! now we’re cutting to a car accident scene, and at first I thought ‘oh so is this why he wasn’t in Kamino, was he saving these people’ but no!

so this woman basically sponsored him to be a hero then? interesting

holy shiiiiit

so he genuinely does want that, what he was talking about before. but it’s because this is all he’s been doing for his whole life, and it’s simply because he felt obligated to do it because he had the talent and was pushed into the “with great power...” mindset

like, he didn’t really have a choice, is the vibe I’m getting from this? it was the right thing to do and it’s what everyone wanted and he was good at it. but that doesn’t mean it’s what he wanted. but because it’s what was needed, he went ahead and did it

jesus christ. no wonder he can’t muster any genuine starry-eyed enthusiasm for the profession the way all of the other hero characters seem to do. it’s not his dream. it’s his burden

(ETA: yeah so. imagine saving someone’s life when you’re still just a child. being put on the spot and acting without any training, but doing your best because without you these people would die. and imagine that as a reward you’re told you have an obligation to take up the most dangerous occupation there is, and sacrifice your freedom and potentially your life in order to serve the greater good. and having no choice, because you are a good person, and so you can’t just refuse, knowing that there are more lives that you could save. 

and as far as everyone else is concerned, you’re a prodigy, young and bold and gifted and living your best life. living a life that many others would envy. but the reality is you’re trapped, with no possible escape in sight other than the precarious hope that one day things will be good enough that your services will no longer be needed.

ladies and gentlemen, if I may hit you up with a blast from the past for one moment, please consider this quote from All Might all the way back in chapter one:

Hawks may have never been much of an All Might fan, but as it turns out, the two of them may have more in common than he ever realized.

yeah, so needless to say I’m watching you very closely Horikoshi, and if you so much as sneeze in a way that looks like you might be considering doing our lost little Icarus any harm, you and I are going to have words.)

and now we are cutting to the Todoroki home!

look at these sweet angels

Endeavor how did it take you so fucking long to realize what you had. you had it so fucking good, dude. these kids are all beautiful and smart and kind and talented and yet you either ignored them or treated them like absolute shit. god, man, you fucked up so bad. this is a second chance that you arguably didn’t deserve! but here you have it anyway! do not fucking waste this, dude

also loving that the Todorokis have such a traditional house but they still have the big flat screen TV right there. because they may be traditional but they still like to watch the cooking channel while they eat

so Endeavor is cautiously saying “long time no see” because you gotta start somewhere, huh

OH MY GOD

AIZAWA DROVE HIM HERE. AND THEN WHAT, JUST STAYED OUTSIDE TO WAIT?

(ETA: because who the hell would want to go and talk to Endeavor when you could stay outside and play with a cat instead)

DID THEY HAVE A MEANINGFUL CONVERSATION ON THE WAY OVER. OR WAS IT QUIET AND AWKWARD. PROBABLY A LITTLE OF COLUMN A AND A LITTLE OF COLUMN B. OH MY GOD. someone better have written fic about it!!

OH MY GOD

TODOROKI SHOUTO IS THE SASSIEST FUCKING CHARACTER IN THIS ENTIRE GODDAMN SERIES CONFIRMED. PACK IT UP BOYS. AIN’T NO ONE EVER GONNA OUTSASS THAT

ENJI I LOVE YOUR FUCKING KIDS SO MUCH YOUR FAMILY IS PERFECT YOU DON’T DESERVE THEM GODDAMN YOU

“JUST BECAUSE YOU HATE HIM”

oh shit Natsu’s getting to his feet and apologizing to Fuyu and saying that he just can’t do this

and he’s walking out the door, but Endeavor’s putting a hand on his shoulder as he leaves and telling him that if he has something to say to go ahead and say it

YOU GO AND PREACH IT, NATSU. YOU DESERVE TO GET IT ALL OFF YOUR CHEST AND HE NEEDS TO UNDERSTAND JUST HOW BADLY HE HURT YOU OR YOU ALL ARE NEVER GONNA HEAL

and I mean, damn. if he didn’t even know Shouto’s favorite food was soba then that basically means he never so much as spent five minutes together with his little brother. Shouto fucking loves soba in the same way Deku loves All Might. it’s probably the purest love in the entire series

yet again the series gives us a glorious scene of Shouto eating food during a time of serious discussion. hungry boi Todoroki Shouto. Todoroki “are you going to finish that” Shouto

and Natsu’s thinking back to what Rei said about Enji trying to face his past and his family head on

but he’s not that forgiving

OH SHIT!?!?

TOUYA. THE FINAL TODOROKI CHILD. AND JUST LIKE WE SUSPECTED, HE IS THE OLDEST

and I get the feeling that whatever happened there is the real reason why Natsu has so much rage built up toward his dad. not that the rest of it wouldn’t be more than enough to make him feel that way, mind. “mom screaming and Shouto crying” holy shit. this family has so many fucking demons

this child needs some hugs people. not from you Endeavor. but maybe Fuyu can go comfort him later. you are valid Natsu and this rage is completely justified. 100%

oh my god this scene, though

this, right here, is the difference between redemption and forgiveness. I’ve essayed about this before. but here it is, vividly on display. Endeavor is actively working toward redeeming himself now, and yet he may never actually be forgiven. he can’t change the past and he can’t erase the hurt emanating from his son. pain that he himself caused. Natsuo may never forgive him, and he’s justified in hating him

but at the same time the only thing Endeavor can do is try anyway to be a better person. he came to all of these realizations much too late, and the damage was already done. but it’s not too late to do whatever he can now. and he clearly is trying to do that

just, it’s such a sad situation, and some really poignant writing, honestly

anyway, Natsuo’s just sarcastically screaming “oh, is that so?” and then storming out and tossing a belated apology over at his sister and thanking her for the food

wonder if he’ll run into Aizawa on his way out. Aizawa will no doubt be in for another interesting conversation with Shouto on the way home. someone write this fucking fic. if they haven’t already. holy shit

now Fuyu is holding her head frustratedly and saying that she was hoping that somehow they would finally able to become a proper family after all this

hey. don’t put this all on Shouto. he has even less reason to forgive Endeavor than Natsuo does. don’t pressure him, let him sort out his own feelings goddammit

...

Todoroki Shouto are you honestly a robot though

now the TV is suddenly cutting to the news and talking about Endeavor! what a fucking coincidence!

and it’s showing all these people giving their opinions after the most recent battle

the newscaster is all, “as you can see, the voices of anxiety haven’t changed”

but! “on the other hand...”

oh my god, Endeavor’s awesome fan now has his own fans. GOOD FOR YOU, CAN’T-YA-SEE-KUN

oh my fucking god

we have reached the point of in-universe memes. this is amazing. this kid’s face is plastered all over the BnHA universe’s version of tumblr. he is the new must-use reaction image. people post their faves struggling followed by “CAN’T YA SEE?!” and they get 100,000 likes. oh my god. this is magnificent

do you all realize what this means. there are memes in the BnHA universe. that means that there is a good likelihood that a number of the U.A. kids, who as we all know have risen to quite the level of fame and prominence themselves in a very short time, have their own memes

the sports festival was broadcast on national fucking television after all. you guys. what is the likelihood that broken-arms Deku became a meme (similar to the way he is in real fucking life). or chained-to-the-podium Bakugou. Bakugou would have been the perfect reaction image for any number of “I don’t want to be here” memes. “when your girlfriend wants to introduce you to her parents but you don’t want to go.” “when you’re in the car and your friend puts on a song you hate and you can’t change it because you don’t have the aux.” “when you’re streaming something and the 30-second ad break comes on and you can’t skip it”

oh my god. Bakugou Katsuki is famous for all the wrong reasons you guys

his mom probably saved all of her favorites and spams him with them constantly

anyways. gotta refocus here lol

so the interviewed people are continuing to gush about the battle. they’re hyped not just about Endeavor, but also Hawks and CYS-kun. “everyone was like, in unison, ‘let’s cheer him on!’ it was crazy!”

so here at least is a little bit of comfort for Endeavor. maybe some broken things can’t be mended, but at least he’s finally learning what it means to be a hero! AFTER TWENTY FIVE YEARS Y’ALL. LATE BLOOMER OR WHAT

-- oh my god!?

he can’t make eye contact while saying it. but he still said it. oh my god

and yet the fact that he made a point of clarifying that he was speaking of Endeavor the hero and not Endeavor his father implies a “but” coming on

yep

what kind of dad. can you become a good dad. you’re finally starting to figure all this shit out, but now here comes the biggest challenge of all

also Shouto is so fucking pure and precious, holy shit. “I haven’t forgiven you for how you tormented mom.” not himself. his mother. he doesn’t even bring his own abuse up. even though he has every right to point out that Endeavor specifically made his life a living hell from the time his quirk developed until the time he went off to high school

and is it because forgiveness for that is not even on the table? or is it because he’s already forgiven him? or is it just that he doesn’t even want to think about it because he’s not ready yet? and I sure hope it’s not because he doesn’t realize just how bad it was, though

just, oh man. so much to unpack here as usual with this family

oh my god Shouto

ENDEAVOR YOU SON OF A BITCH YOU DON’T DESERVE THIS GENTLE, THOUGHTFUL, COMPASSIONATE ANGEL OF A SON

and it’s clear he has no idea what to say in response to that, so he’s just standing there while meanwhile Fuyu is tearing up and telling Shouto she’ll bring him some more soup

holy shit we’re getting Endeavor’s first person thoughts now oh my god

like I said, all of this was brought on by him finally achieving the thing he’d sacrificed everything to achieve, only to come to the stark realization that it wasn’t worth it. at all. so a pretty painful catalyst, all things considered, but if any asshole ever needed that kick in the pants it was this fucker right here

oh fucking shit, fuck me if I’m not getting Endeavor feels oh fuck

“for what reason”, All Might asks. and Endeavor realizes: for our children

oh fuck oh fuck

okay so while I so far have very much liked the delicate way this whole process has been handled as far as his children go, when it comes to his wife that’s a whole nother story. that’s going to be even trickier to pull off, and just. oh boy I’m nervous now

(ETA: still nervous tbh. but I guess we’ll see)

so he’s turning to leave, and Fuyu is like “DAD NOW YOU TOO??”

-- and holy shit, he’s apologizing

for everything

bastard finally got those words out. I can hardly believe it

OH DAMN

FUCK ME IF THAT ISN’T EXACTLY WHAT I’VE BEEN SAYING THIS WHOLE DAMN TIME?

holy shit. holy fucking shit this is too damn good and I love it

oh fuck and now we’re cutting back to Heights Alliance. this may just be the one and only time I’ve ever been slightly disappointed to cut back to 1-A and their antics

and we’re cutting back to Deku, who’s wiped out from the day’s training and promptly collapsing into bed upon returning to his room

HOLY SHIT WHAT THE

WHAT THE HELL KIND OF SPOOKY FUCKING DREAM IS THIS. DEKU COVERED IN SOME KIND OF MYSTERIOUS BLACK FIRE??

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

SHIMURAAAAA

HOLY SHIT, IT��S CLEARLY HER. AND DEKU HAS NEVER SEEN HER FACE BEFORE AND YET THIS IS UNMISTAKABLE

IS THIS THE PAST AVATARS SHIT AGAIN AT LONG LAST?? HOLY SHIT?

OH MY GODDDDDDD

IS THAT ALL MIGHT!?!?!?

and he’s remembering that he’s seen this before. and of course we all recall back during his fight with Shinsou when this happened and he was suddenly able to activate OFA and break Shinsou’s mind control

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

HOLY SHITTTTTT

I HAVEN’T CLICKED TO THE NEXT CHAPTER THIS FAST SINCE FUCKING DEKU VS KACCHAN PART TWO. HOLY FUCKING SHIT!!!!! I’M NOT EVEN GONNA FUCKING ANALYZE ANYTHING, FUTURE ME CAN FUCKING DO THAT. I’M JUST HYPED!! YESSSSSSSS. DEKU’S DAD VS HIS UNCLE LMAO

(ETA: well, future me isn’t going to add anything either, since this recap is long enough as it is. but this really is a great ending to an outstanding chapter you guys)

[poisonappletales]

Upcoming Valentine Event

Hello, everyone! Good evening from here.

Hope you’ve all been doing well! January is almost over, so do you know what that means? Valentine’s Day is coming soon.

I’ve got two special events in store. The first one is an old tradition - give a Valentine and receive one back on White Day! The second is a Host Event. I’ll go into more detail on that later.

Here’s how this Valentine tradition works:

1) Make a Valentine.

It can be a card like this, an audio piece like so, a drawing - or anything else outside the box! Just keep it PG-13 and clean. Here’s a full list of previous Valentines (along with the men’s accompanying replies).

2) Give your Valentine to one of the men (or women) from any of our games (i.e. Don’t Take This Risk or Beauty and the War).

The webtoon’s included. You can give a Valentine to multiple characters if you so wish! (This is Girl x Boy and Boy x Girl, so if you give a Valentine to a man, he’ll treat you as a woman and vice versa.)

To give us a Valentine, there are several ways to do this. Make a post on tumblr and tag us. E-mail us at [poisonappletales(at)gmail(dot)com]. Send us a tweet. As long as we know where it is and where to find it, then it’s all good!

You can do this from now until February 18, 2019.

3) Get a Valentine back about a month later!

This is based off Japan’s practice of White Day. (Please note that Virgo Island natives don’t actually have a White Day. I personally find it to be an interesting tradition...and it gives me time to make the replies.)

Now for the very special Host Event ♥:

This will take place on our fair and lovely Discord!

In honor of Valentine’s Day, I’m going to hop online on select days and roleplay as one of my men, who will woo every lady online like he’s your boyfriend/host. That’s the concept of a host club (from Japan) - handsome men catering to your needs and being a perfectly loving beau.

Now, I don’t have time to roleplay every single one of my characters, so I’m going to do a select few. I asked my patrons who they wanted this Valentine’s Day, and here are the three they chose:

King Barium

“A fine choice - one you won’t regret. I know how to treat a woman like the beautiful princess she is.”

As the one who came in last place for the War: Valentine Edition poll, King Barium was a surprising request! But as the owner of a harem, he’s more than qualified to be your host...

Love Style: Indulgent, smooth and flirty.

Arsenik of the Hulder

“It’ll be my pleasure to serve you. But...wait - I’m supposed to see every single woman there as my beloved? I’m not entirely sure how to make that work. When I love someone, she has my heart entirely. There’s no room for anyone else.” 

[The corner of his lips quirks up with a hint of amusement. Jestingly:] “Am I supposed to imagine each one as a duplicate of the other? This will prove to be quite interesting...” [Chuckling:] “If I’m there to entertain, I’ll certainly make quite the spectacle of myself!”

Like Arsenik said, he’ll have to think about how to make this work, but he’ll do his best to please you. He’s an intelligent man, so he’ll figure it out.

Love Style: Devoted, attentive and sweet. Shyer than he looks.

Unknown

“Ooh, yes. I am the obvious choice, am I not? You know you want me. I know I want you...kihihi! I love you, kittens. ♥”

This host list just wouldn’t be complete without Unknown, would it?

Love Style: Aggressive, sensual and...sensual. All right, he’s also unexpected. Perhaps even dangerous...

Note: When I say “aggressive,” I mean aggressive. He doesn’t always take “no” for an answer, you might notice. If he’s ever making you uncomfortable in the Discord and you want him to back off, just let me know.

You could say, “Hey, Crown Ruler! Get this guy away from me!” or “OOC (out of character): Get him off me!” Anything along those lines will work. Something that tells me you’re serious and not just reacting to the roleplay.

I’ve already told Unknown not to cross the wrong lines while he’s there (and to give no spoilers), but I can’t guarantee he’ll always listen. Still, I will restrain him when needed.

If I do have the time, I’ll bring in some of my other men as well. In which case, here are the possible other hosts who might be there to entertain you:

Chase of the Trold

“Huh? I don’t think anyone would really want me as a...as a ‘host.’ But if I’m there, I’ll do my best to make you happy!”

Love Style: Friendly, awkward and cheerful. You might say he’s a little like the boy next door...

Wind of the Imugi

“I don’t care to do this. Find somebody else to waste time with those girls.”

Love Style: Hot and cold. A snarky, arrogant grump. He doesn’t even like this description I’m writing for him.

Night of the Vi

“Why not? I’ve never done something like this before. I like it. Let’s make the most of it.”

Love Style: The bad boy who’s cool, easygoing and fun.

Onyx of the Vi

“Tell me what’s expected of me.”

Love Style: Distant, cold and silent. He doesn’t really have a love style, to be honest.

Viktor of the Hulder

“Oh-ho! A host? I wouldn’t mind trying my hand at that at all. It’ll be nice to get acquainted with other women and make new friends. Well, I know the point of the exercise isn’t to befriend them, but since this isn’t a serious thing, I imagine quite a few friendships could come out of this!

It all depends on who I’m meeting. Hmm? Was I supposed to say something more romantic? I’m not supposed to be promoting myself, am I? I mean, what that war chief - Onyx - said was hardly enticing. Unless there was some sort of double meaning behind it. A hidden innuendo! What a sly man...”

Love Style: Bubbly, outgoing and talkative! As you might have just seen...

X from Prison

“I’m the best out of all these chumps! You see my White Day card up there, baby? It beats all the others - what with its firey burst and everything. Yeah, you know it’s true!

Even if you’re with some other host, I’ll steal you away from him.”

Love Style: He has the X Love Style. I think that’s all that needs to be said.

Now, you might be wondering what days these men will show up in the Discord. I don’t have a complete idea of my February schedule just yet, so what I’m going to do is announce it a few days before each host’s visit.

I can guarantee that I’ll be in the Discord at least three times - once each for King Barium, Arsenik and Unknown as requested by my beloved patrons.

If I find I have the time, I’ll do a spontaneous visit, in which I’d either announce it a few hours before or just jump in without any forewarning. I’ve never done the latter before, except for a beloved patron and friend’s birthday, so I might as well see what’s that like. If I had my schedule set in stone, I probably wouldn’t do this, but it is what it is. As X would say, let’s roll with it.

In the event of a surprise visit, I’ll bring in a different host or one that you request.

So, stay tuned for the date and time of each host’s visit to the Discord! They hope to see you there.

That’s all I have to say about these upcoming Valentine events. I have a lot of things I want to reblog from y’all and asks I want to answer. I appreciate each and every one. I assure you that I’ll get to those as soon as possible!

Before I bring this to an end, here are some fun pre-Valentine “skits.” They’re a mix of sweet and spicy romance with a large helping of comedy. They just happened to spring to mind, so I’m putting them down here!

If you came here solely for details on the Valentine event, feel free to mosey along. Otherwise, if you have some spare time and you want to be amused, read on! Please don’t forget to pay attention to the rating.

Rating: 14+ for very sensual themes and some dubiously consensual things.

Ambrosia’s Host Guide

“Yes, dear? You want me to describe each host’s...love style for everyone?”  [chuckling] “I certainly don’t mind. It’s quite nice of these men to devote their time to making others happy.”

King Barium’s Love Style (by Ambrosia): “A natural-born lover. You can be at ease with him. Please feel free to share your thoughts frankly with him. Even if you aren’t interested, he’ll understand and won’t pressure you.”

Arsenik’s Love Style (by Ambrosia): “A true gentlemen and a dutiful warrior! Now, as a gentleman, he feels obligated to accommodate nearly every lady’s request, so please don’t take advantage of him too much. ＾◡＾ ”

Unknown’s Love Style (by Ambrosia): “If you’re interested in him, he’ll surely fly to the moon and back for you! But if you aren’t, please be wary of catching his eye. If you run into any trouble, please seek one of the other hosts or myself to help you.”

Chase’s Love Style (by Ambrosia): “He’s a sweet man, who tries very hard. He’s quite fun to be around with! You’ll surely enjoy your time with him.”

Wind’s Love Style (by Ambrosia): “He can speak sharply, but be patient with him. You might see other sides of him! But if he does get out of hand, please come see me.”

Night’s Love Style (by Ambrosia): “Take my advice: You don’t want this man as your host.”

Onyx’s Love Style (by Ambrosia): “As the war chief, he has a great deal of experience with battles and all things related to them! You can learn a lot from him. Don’t worry - the king won’t allow him to hurt you.”

Viktor’s Love Style (by Ambrosia): “A very sunny man who will make every conversation lively and amusing! He enjoys getting to know others, so don’t hesitate to approach him. Unless you’re from the Trold or the Valkyrie but I doubt you would wish to seek him out then.”

X’s Love Style (by Ambrosia): “Don’t let him intimidate you. Of course, you shouldn’t unnecessarily provoke him either. As a criminal, I don’t think he would hesitate to hurt someone...but please don’t let that scare you! If he’s acting out, please seek one of the other hosts or myself.”

“There we are. I feel like I had to attach quite a few warnings to these descriptions, but these should help anyone seeking a host.”

Q. Ambrosia, which host would you want to spend a night with?

“Eh? We’re not done? Oh, I-I see...”

Prompt: Men, take a turn each trying to convince her to choose you!

“Oh, I’m first? Excellent. 

Ambrosia...”  [King Barium reaches forward to scoop up her hand.] “Don’t worry. If this is your first time, I’ll be gentle.”

“Um...”

[The king slips the stalk of a rose between his lips and playfully lifts his eyebrows a few times.]

“What are you doing?” [Snarling, Wind shoves King Barium away from her.]

“Ambrosia, you obviously want to be with me. Nobody else would take you anyway.”

“Really! This is how you’re acting as a host?”

[Facing towards Wind, Onyx begins to unsheathe his blade.] “Do not touch the king.”

“Now, hold on, Onyx. You’re supposed to convince Ambrosia to choose you first.”

[to Ambrosia:] “We’ll do anything you want for a night.”

[He turns back and begins to approach Wind, who has his claws unfurled.]

“Oh! Sir Onyx, Sir Wind, must you fight?”

“Uh...weren’t we supposed to take turns? It’s not very organized like this...”

“Miss Ambrosia...” [Arsenik’s voice is too quiet to be heard.]

“You know, I would try to convince you, Ambrosia, but I have a feeling you’re already set against me. Even your host description for me was: ‘You don’t want this man.’”

“Then, please don’t even try.”

“Miss Ambrosia...” [His voice is still too low.]

“Ahh...darling~♥.” [Unknown slides an arm around her shoulders.] “I’ll make sure this is a night you never forget. Trust me - you’ll never want it to end, love.”

[With each word, he leans closer and closer to her lips.]

[Pulling back from him, she makes a smile, speaking a bit teasingly:] “...What if I want it to end already?”

“Knock it off, Unknown.

Ambrosia, uh...I don’t know what I’m doing, but I won’t be a creep like some people - honest. But choose whoever you’re comfortable with, okay?”

“Oh, that’s not a bad piece of reverse psychology.”

“I wasn’t trying to do that, Viktor.”

“I know. But you did just that anyway.”

“Huh?”

“M-Miss Ambrosia!”

[His raised voice nearly makes her jump.] “Y-Yes, Sir Arsenik?”

[He smiles in apology.] “Pardon me, Miss Ambrosia. I...well, I suppose my voice kept failing me earlier. I was trying to catch your attention. And now...it seems that words are failing me, heh.”

“I think you’re talking just fine like you always do.”

“You’re much too kind, Miss Ambrosia.” [There they are, falling back to their usual patterns of formality. The gears of his brain are flying into overdrive.] “You should choose me...”

[He trails off. She smiles and nods for him to continue. Staring into her darkly pretty eyes, thoughts escape him for another moment longer.]

“...Forgive me. I can’t think of a single reason why you should. I...”  [Arsenik breaks away from her gaze, looking towards the floor.] “...don’t deserve you.”

“Oh, Sir Arsenik...”

“That’s right. You should be with me, princess!”

[With a single motion, he lifts her gasping into his arms.] “Come on. Let’s go.”

“Sir X...if you’re hoping to convince me this way, this is hardly your best effort.”

“Oh, yeah? Always hard to please, ain’t you? Don’t worry. You’ll see I’m not all show when we’re alone tonight.”

[Arsenik moves to stand in his way.] “I don’t believe the lady has said she wanted you.”

“You’re makin’ a mistake, blondie. You really think you can stand up to me?”

[Arsenik’s smile curves with the edges of a smirk.] “Of course.”

“Heh.” [He lowers Ambrosia onto a table behind him.] “Stay here, princess. I’ll come back for ya later.”

“You’re talking like both the hero and the villain. I hardly know which one you mean to play.”

“What are you talking about? You know you want me...” [His voice drops to a whisper as his smile falls away for a moment.] “...right?”

[As X turns back towards Arsenik, Viktor steps up to her.]

“Are you comfortable sitting on the table like that? He really is some kind of brute. He ought to know better than to give a lady an inappropriate ‘chair’ like that. Let me help you off and find you a better place to sit.”

“I feel like I should make my choice soon to put an end to all this. What a strange exercise we’re undergoing!”

“Haha! Indeed. But let me make my appeal to you first, if I may.

Miss Ambrosia...” [He falls silent for a few beats. She waits patiently as he takes in a deep breath before uttering his next words.] “I’ll...I’ll make you feel good!”

“Hmm?” [She didn’t know what answer to expect from him, but it certainly wasn’t this.]

“I...I won’t make you feel uncomfortable. If you are, simply tell me and I’ll stop. No, I think I’ll know without you even needing to say anything. You’ve always been wonderfully expressive, and I admire that. I’ll treat you well and set the mood just as you like it.

Do you fancy candlelight? Perhaps, flower petals? I can certainly decorate the bedroom with such things. Whatever is to your liking!”

“The...the bedroom?” [Her face flushes crimson.]

[There’s a blush on Viktor’s cheeks as well, but he keeps going.] “I’ll truly savor a night with you, Miss Ambrosia. I...I know you’re delicate, so I won’t be rough. I mean, unless you want it that way, but since you’ve never done it before, I think that’s something you would have to build up to, if you so desire.

Not that I’m saying you aren’t strong in your own way, Miss Ambrosia! Yes, I’ve always known you to have a fair strength of character. But what I mean is that your constitution isn’t...well, I don’t think it’s meant for rough handling -”

“Um...Sir Viktor...”

“- or throwing around or pounding, you know? So, I won’t do any of those things or have any unreasonable expectations of you. I’ll treat you tenderly and ensure that you enjoy it.”

[Farther back, Unknown tosses his head back in a laugh.] “Gyahaha...!”

“S-Sir Viktor...can I...ah, I’d like to ask you something.”

“By all means, ask away. Is there something you’re confused about?”

“Yes. I mean - Sir Viktor...I’m not sure what kind of lady you think I am, but I’m surprised by your...very bold intentions, if I should choose to come with you.”

“What do you mean? Oh, was I speaking too frankly? I just wanted to make it clear that I would be a proper lover to you. Was I being insensitive with my choice of words? It’s hard to be otherwise with a matter like this.”

“...I think I’m very disappointed in you, Sir Viktor.  Perhaps, I should have attached a warning to your host description, too...!”

“Eh? Miss Ambrosia! Please don’t be upset. I don’t understand what I said to offend you.

You were being asked who you wanted to spend a night with, weren’t you? How else was I supposed to convince you of my eligibility?”

“Sir Viktor! I-I don’t think the question was supposed to be interpreted that way!”

“Really? I thought it was.”

“Oh, so it’s not just me! Kyahaha!”

“It’s totally about doing it, right?”

“You’re just being naïve, Ambrosia.”

“Honestly, the question could go either way, but I wondered how you might perceive it, Miss Ambrosia. In the event that you did choose me, I wasn’t about to force you into anything.”

“Sounds like the general consensus is ‘yes, the question is a naughty one.’ I bet that makes you even more repulsed by me, doesn’t it?”

“Uh, for the record...I wasn’t entirely sure.”

“But you admit it was a possibility.”

“W-Well...I mean, why does it have to be phrased that way?!”

“So, who do you want to sleep with, lovely? It’s me, isn’t it?”

“I...”

“Nah, I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again. She wants me.”

“How about we hear the answer from her lips first?”

“No need. Her body should tell you the answer.”

“I -”

“But she said it herself, you know. I’m a natural-born lover. That means I have the most experience here.”

“Experience doesn’t always mean better, does it?”

“Hmm...how should I answer that question?”

“W-Well...I don’t know!” [Chase’s face grows as red as a tomato.] “Don’t feelings count for something? That’s more important than...than being experienced and all that. That can come later, can’t it?”

[groans] “Ambrosia, if you don’t spit it out, I’m coming over there.”

“Beat you to it.”

“I refuse to answer this question! It’s completely inappropriate, and I’m shocked by the lengths your minds went. All of you are acting like boys! Men, please grow up - and take a cold bath.”

[She whirls away on her heel and marches away.]

“I-Is she mad?”

“I’d say so. That, and embarrassed - particularly if the blush on her face is any indication. But I suppose it’s only natural for a lady to react in such a way, particularly if she’s...untouched.”

“Let’s end the gossip here. I’ve already known her to be a lady of class. I feel horrible for having upset her...”

“If you ask me, you contributed the least to that. As for me, I think just being here puts her in a bad mood.”

“Actually, Onyx wins out over him. He didn’t say a peep after trying to convince her. Good job, by the way, Onyx.”

“It’s all right. I know she wanted me.”

“Nuh-uh. She’s my woman. That thing about taking a bath? Clearly an invitation for me to join her.”

“I’m fairly certain she wants you to take that bath. Alone.”

“Oh, so now you have your tongue.”

“Certainly. There’s only one woman who turns me into a fool.”

“You think that’s something to be proud about?”

“So, I think we’re done here. It really is a shame we never managed to hear her answer...”

Skit Finale - The Hostess Club

[Bo-Peep pouts and puts her hands on her hips.]“Aww, it’s no fair the boys get to have all the fun.”  [Her face lights up.] “We should have our very own Hostess Event!”

“Ooh, ooh! I like it!” [Rosemary clasps her hands against her chest, stars in her eyes.] “Being able to cozy up to all the cute guys...”

“I don’t think it’s such a good idea for you to be involved, Lady Rosemary. You’ll latch onto all of them and never let go.”

“You’re just saying that because you want them all for yourself, Lady Jasmine! You’ll act all nice - smiling, giggling, batting your eyelashes...”

“Excuse me? I am nice.”

“No, you’re not.”

“Yes, I am. You’re just being a brat.”

“No, I’m not.”

“Yes, you are!”

[Brooks smirks.]“But ya know, some of the guys that come over won’t always be ‘cute.’”

“W-What?!”

“Uh-huh. Think of someone like Chasey boy coming here for some lovin’!”

[crinkling her nose in disgust]“Ewww!”

[On Brooks’s right, Wildfire rolls her eyes.]“Why are we here again?”

“I dunno. To do somethin’ new? Kyahaha!”

“I’m not here to ‘entertain’ anyone. Boys entertain me.”

“Oh, come on. Be a good sport!”

“Right! Lady Ambrosia, you’ll take care of all the un-cute ones, right?”

“I’ll do all the ones you aren’t willing to service.”

“Pfft!” [Bo-Peep covers her mouth with both hands, trying and failing to stifle her giggles.] “You’ll do them...! Oh, you’ll service them all right...! Heeheehee!”

[smirking] “Doll face walked right into that one.”

“Oh dear...” [Ambrosia shakes her head, smiling.] “Don’t tell me you two are as bad as the men...”

“Huh? Oh, you mean about the whole sleeping-together fiasco?”

“E-Eh? You heard about that already?”

“Well, of course! King Barium tells me everything. So, who would you have picked?”

“We’re not here to talk about that.”

“Aww, why not?”

“We’re trying to set up a hostess event, aren’t we?”

“Not like you’ll all have very many guys with faces like yours.”

“Or yours.”

“I’m just glad I don’t look like you. Besides, I’m not here to play the hostess. I’m just here to laugh at you all.”

“Hyahaha!”

“If you aren’t here to participate, then please excuse us. But I do advise you not to celebrate prematurely.”

[As Wildfire smirks, Jasmine ushers Bo-Peep, Rosemary and Ambrosia away from the Valkyrie. Once they’re out of earshot, she whirls towards them with narrowed eyes.]

“This hostess event has to succeed.”

“Oh, definitely!”

“Uh, that’s a given, isn’t it?”

“You don’t understand. We can’t let those Valkyrie skanks have the last laugh. You don’t want that, do you?”

“Of course not!”

“No way, no way!”

“It sounds like you already have a battle plan in mind, Lady Jasmine. Please tell us what it is.”

“All right. Lady Ambrosia!” [She points a finger at her cousin.] “Tell me what a hostess is.”

“A hostess is much like an entertainer. They keep you amused and smiling, treating each man as if they were already within the stages of courtship.”

“That’s right.”

“You didn’t know that?”

[Jasmine goes red.] “Of course I did!”

“No, you didn’t.”

“I did! I’m just making sure brats like you understand the concept of what we’re doing here.”

“And your point is...?”

“To make this hostess event a success, we need to draw in as many men as possible and ensure they have the best possible experience.

Being fun, graceful and charming is one thing. But I think we all know that men care about presentation as well. The more they like what they see, the more they’ll want to come back and tell others about it.

So, let’s start with our apparel.”

“Ooh, costume and wardrobe? That’s my specialty!”

[She whips out a selection of clothes that she so happens to have on hand.] “Here, take a look at these dresses!”

“Hmm...it would help to see how it looks on someone. Lady Ambrosia, can you wear one of these?”

“Ah, yes, I’d be delighted to help.”

“Here you go, Ambrosia!” 

[Bo-Peep hands her the prettiest, glitziest dress of the bunch. Ambrosia leaves to change into it and then returns to model it in front of Jasmine.]

“Ooh, you look good in it!”

“Oh, thank you, Lady Bo-Peep! You’re much too kind. I feel like I haven’t done this lovely gown justice...”

“No, no, it’s no good. Can you make some changes to it, Lady Bo-Peep?”

“Of course! Just let me know what you want fixed.”

“Okay, good. Make the length of the dress shorter.”

“All right.” [She pins up the hem of the dress, making it knee-length.]

“No, shorter.”

“Up to the thighs here? You have really pretty ones, by the way, Ambrosia.”

“Um...isn’t this a little too short?”

“No, shorter!”

“Like this?”

“L-Lady Bo-Peep!” [She tries to tug her shortened skirt further down.] “T-They’ll see that...!”

“What’s that? Your underwear? Your butt cheeks? That’s okay! You’re just with us ladies!”

“B-But we’re supposed to be wearing this in public later, aren’t we?”

“That’s okay! I’ll give you some pretty lingerie to wear.”

“T-This is not okay!”

“You should give all of us that, Lady Bo-Peep.”

“Some pretty lingerie? Sure! I have plenty.”

“Lady Jasmine, are you really fine with wearing this?!”

“Oh no, I don’t plan on showing anyone what I’m wearing underneath. But if we make the dress a little sheer...that would show it off without really showing it off, right?”

“L-Lady Jasmine, you aren’t making any sense!”

“Why don’t we have different themes? Like, I’m the cute one, Lady Jasmine’s the elegant one, Lady Bo-Peep’s the stylish one, and Lady Ambrosia’s the slutty one!”

“Lady Rosemary!”

“I don’t mean it in a bad way. I mean, like, the sexy one.  There - is that any better?”

“No - no, it isn’t!”

“Okay, good. Keep holding your skirt down and making that blushing face. It’ll make men think of bedroom things.”

“Oh, please, why are you talking this way...!”

“Ooh, Ambrosia, you should try saying the same line you said earlier. The thing about doing them and servicing them and whatnot.”

“That’s perfect! With a motto like that, all the men will flock to our event!”

“This is growing completely out of hand!”

“Okay, one last thing. We need a trial run.”

“That...I don’t like the sound of that.”

“Lady Bo-Peep.” [She takes the redhead’s arm and whispers into her ear.]

“I-I think I’ll just leave. After changing, of course.”

“Not so fast! Lady Rosemary, grab her!”

“On it!”

[Rosemary lunges for Ambrosia’s arm while Jasmine snatches the other one.]

“A-Ah! Oh, oh...dears, I know you’re having fun, but this is really taking it too far!”

“All right, let’s head out!”

[The two Phoenix begin to drag Ambrosia out of the room, with Bo-Peep trailing behind with a beaming face.]

“W-Wait, please tell me where you’re taking me! And if you’re bringing me out in public, can’t one of you at least pull down my skirt...!”

“Didn’t I tell you, Ambrosia? I’m sure your underwear and butt cheeks are juuuust fine!”

“F-For a hostess event, I don’t see why I have to be the only one subjected to this...!”

“You want me to show off my underwear and butt cheeks, too? I don’t mind!”

“T-That really isn’t what I mean!”

“Okay, stop right here.” [She looks at Bo-Peep.] “The next guy that comes by, you know what to do.”

[Bo-Peep gives a vigorous nod, her red curls bouncing with the movement.]

“Um...” [Half-resigned to whatever they have planned, Ambrosia’s shoulders droop and she murmurs to herself:] “Do I really want to know what that means?”

“Someone’s coming!”

“Ooh, ooh, who is it? Who is it?”

“I don’t know. It’s a guy!”

“How do you know?”

“Well, because he doesn’t have the parts women have - obviously!”

“I mean, you can tell that much, but you still don’t know who it is?”

“Shh! Be quiet!”

“Please don’t come over here!”

[hissing] “Shut up!” [She pinches Ambrosia’s arm.]

[wincing] “Nn...!”

[Hearing the footsteps stop, Jasmine calls over:]“Actually, it’d be nice if you could come here and give us a helping hand.”

[The footsteps resume. Jasmine exchanges glances with Bo-Peep, who nods.]

“Lady Jasmine, you’re letting your competitive nature blind you!”

“Lady Ambrosia, we simply can’t let those Valkyrie look down on us!” 

[She gives Ambrosia a sidelong glance before letting out a sigh.] “Okay, look. You give the man who’s coming over a proper invitation to the event, and I’ll release your arm. You can pull down your skirt like I know you want to - not that it’ll help much.

But only if you invite him appropriately!”

[Ambrosia’s face brightens.] “I-I will! So, you’ll let me go?”

“Lady Rosemary will still be holding onto your other arm, though.”

“Thank you, Lady Jasmine! I’ll take what I can. Even though I would appreciate having my freedom back.”

“Make sure you tell him: ‘We’re having a hostess event! Please come inside, and I’ll service you nicely!’”

“...I don’t know if I really want to say that.”

“You don’t even know the implications behind it!”

“But I can still tell there’s something wrong with it based off everyone’s reaction!”

“Do you want me to lift your skirt and show off your unmentionables again?”

“N-No...!”

[to Jasmine:] “Told you you were mean.”

“This is war! I know you want to reign victorious over the Valkyrie, too.”

“Uh...well, I care more about having lots of cute guys in the room.”

“And this will do it. Lady Ambrosia, say what I told you to or I’m revoking your modesty privileges!”

[murmuring to herself:] “W-What about this is modest?” [Hearing the footsteps drawing ever closer, Ambrosia heaves a sigh.] 

“Fine. But Lady Jasmine, there are other ways to draw in men without using me like this! I don’t even think I’m the best candidate for this!”

“Of course you are! Now, don’t forget to smile, everyone.”

“You know...I-I think it could be a little boy approaching us!”

“No, it isn’t. I know it’s not for a fact.”

“Stop struggling already and just give in, Lady Ambrosia. Don’t forget what I said!”

“Oh, this is so embarrassing...!”

[As soon as the stranger rounds the corner, Ambrosia dips forward in a bow, completely wanting to avoid eye contact.]

“W-We’re having a hostess event!” [Clenching the front of her skirt tightly, she draws in a deep breath and rushes through her next words.] “P-Please come inside, and I’ll service you nicely!”

[As she straightens herself, her gaze falls upon the last man she wanted to see.]

“Oh no.”

“Hmm...you’ll service me nicely, will you? That’s a first.”

“I take it back. I’ll never service y-”

[Jasmine gives Ambrosia’s arm another hard pinch, making her whimper, and then shoots a pointed look in Bo-Peep’s direction.]

[perking up]“That’s right! If you want to play with her...” [One slender hand begins to reach towards Ambrosia.]

“Um...Lady Bo-Peep...!”

“Come on over and tell all your friends about it!” [Seizing the neckline, she yanks down on it, hard enough for Ambrosia’s chest to pop out of it.]

“Whoops! Sorry, Ambrosia! I used a little too much strength, hehe. I only meant to show off more of your cleavage!”

“I don’t mind.” [A playful smile dances across Night’s lips.] “So, this is the kind of service you’re offering, Ambrosia?”

“No!” [She wraps her free arm around her chest.] “You...you beast!”

“I’m not sure why you’re saying that when I’m not even the one doing that to you.”

“By that, she means you ‘sexy beast.’”

[jokingly] “Oh, that makes more sense now.”

[She struggles to worm herself free of Rosemary’s grip without success.] “Avert your eyes already!”

“I thought you were offering to service me?”

“No!”

“Yes!”

“Yes!”

“Hmm...one ‘no’ and two ‘yes’s.” [Night makes a show of rubbing his chin.] “This is a hard situation to grasp. Do you want me to help you, Ambrosia?”

“No, I don’t need your help! Just please make yourself scarce!”

“But it sounds like they don’t want me to go.”

“No!”

“Yes!”

“Yes!”

“NO!”

[hissing in her ear:] “Lady Ambrosia, stop covering yourself so much!”

“L-Lady Jasmine - kyaaa! No, stop! Stop, this is madness! Anyone but him - please make him go away!

NO!”

[teasingly...?] “Oh, yes.”

So, these skits were pretty much pure comedy...well, for the most part. Hopefully, you didn’t find anything too disturbing. And for once, it isn’t all thanks to Unknown.

I was thinking of having Unknown be the approaching stranger, but I almost wonder if he wasn’t partly expected. Plus, he’d no doubt make the situation ten times worse for poor Ambrosia.

Anyway, any questions or comments, just let me know. Have a great rest of the day!

[xukunstellation]

Fantasy Fest Series: Demon of Mine || Bu Fan [Demon!AU]

Credit to @buyuefan for the gif, which sparked inspiration for this fic!

Title: Demon of Mine Pairing: Reader x Bufan Genre: Witch!AU + Demon!AU + fluff  Word Count: 2,202 words Summary: Magic can be tricky, especially when you accidentally summon a demon into your home.

A/N: My first fic in the Fantasy Fest series! At the time of me writing up this fic, demon!au is currently in the lead in the poll. Who else better to play the role of a demon that Bufan himself? Also, a disclaimer: everything is pretty much more or less fictional. I made up a few things as far as summoning demons go and I also didn’t want anyone to get any ideas, lol. Everything is under the cut because this is the longest fic i’ve ever written I think, oof. Enjoy demon!Bufan! 

Warning: mild cursing, brief mention of blood

ya’ll asked for demon!au

so i gotchu boo

you come from a family of witches 

magic has ran through your family blood line for generations, dating back to the early 1400s

contrary to popular belief, your family did not practice black magic or served the Devil

instead your family used magical skills in order to heal others, even opening an apothecary as a family business

all throughout your life, you loved learning about the functions of different types of herbs and ingredients and using that knowledge to create all types of potions and concoctions 

you also had an affinity for spell-casting and charms

every so often, your parents would go on business trips and travel across realms, bringing back new knowledge of spells and potions that you had never heard of 

sometimes they were gone for months or, rarely, a year

it did feel strange being on your own for long periods of time, but you grew accustomed to it

it also meant you were left in charge of running the apothecary, which you were all too eager for

as you flipped to a page in one of your many ancient potion-books to find the cure for nightshade rash for one of your clients, you scanned the ingredient list and saw that one of the ingredients was virtually illegible due to the fact that the ink was rubbed away over time 

“damn. how am I supposed to make this potion now?” you sighed. “guess i’ll have to ask grandma.”

after closing up the shop so that no customers wandered in, you headed to the back room. shelves lined the walls and were filled with all sorts of magical ingredients, all neatly organized according to their use. the soft sound of the fire crackling under the fireplace and the bubbling of the cauldron hanging above it filled the room. books and papers written in latin littered the tables and floor messily, the aftermath of your charms studying session from earlier

with a flick of your wrist, the books and papers levitated and swirled in the air for a moment before tidying themselves into organized stacks. another flick of your wrist, everything including the furniture moved on their own and cleared the center of the floor

“hm... what was the spell that mom used?” you said to yourself.

you had never summoned your deceased grandmother before, let alone any spirit for that matter. usually it was your mother who did the spirit contacting

looking through a spell book, you stopped at one particular spell and figured this was what you were looking for 

how to summon a loved one

according to the spell, all you had to do was draw a magic circle, provide a drop of blood and say a simple incantation. the circle will automatically summon the one you love, which you figured was your grandmother in this case

sounds easy enough

oh boy were you in for a surprise

you carefully used a piece of white chalk to carefully replicate the image  of a large summoning circle, carefully sketching intricate patterns as you go. facing the fireplace, you slowly inhaled and exhaled, a stream of wind leaving your mouth and extinguishing the flames, turning the room almost pitch black. with that said, you lit a few candles around the circle. gently running your index finger over the other, a small incision appeared. tilting your finger, you let a drop of blood fall into the circle. it was time to start the ritual.

closing your eyes, you channeled all of your energy to your core and began reciting the spell incantation. feeling the magic run through your veins, you felt the air pick up and stir around you, creating a vortex at the center of the circle. shadows danced along the walls to the sound of your chanting that grew in volume with each repetition. the once tiny golden flames were now a roaring, brilliant amethyst. 

your words came to a halt as you finished reciting the spell. the room around you also fell into a complete silence. opening your eyes, you were prepared to greet the spirit of your grandmother

except it wasn’t a spirit

hell (no pun intended) it wasn’t even your grandmother

floating in a fog of purple smoke above the summoning circle was a massive male figure around 6′3′’. his hair was a blood crimson, mirroring his glowing eyes beneath his closed lids. aside from wearing slightly loose black pants and a long trench coat, he was completely shirtless 

(you were lowkey checking out his abs ooh la la)

but what caught you the most off guard was the lilac tint of his skin, the onyx curled horns above his head, deadly talons instead of fingernails, and the powerful presence of obsidian wings that were tattered and torn at the edges and looked at least twice your size

“oh shit i just summoned a demon”

at the sound of your voice, the demon’s eyes snapped open and glared at you with what you believe was murderous intent

fuck

you were going to die tonight 

you were a healer, not a fighter rip you

just as the demon made a move to step out of circle, the spell broke. the magic that kept him afloat disappeared in a flash

causing him to plant face first onto your wooden floor

“....pfffft-”

you knew you probably shouldn’t have found the idea of a potentially dangerous demon in your home funny, but you couldn’t stopped laughing at how someone so scary looking could be so clumsy

meanwhile the demon only winced in pain as he stood back up and rubbed his face before shooting you a look of disbelief

most people would faint, pee their pants, cry, or at least scream in fear at the sight of him

but here you are laughing at him

who tf were you?

“are you done?” he deadpanned after watching you laugh at him for three minutes straight

wiping away a stray tear, you barely managed to settle down and responded, “y-yeah i think i’m good. are you?”

“peachy”

you felt the need to laugh again... until you realized that the spell you used was meant to summon:

a loved one

and it summoned this random demon 

wtf was that supposed to mean

“wait, who the hell are you?” you interrogated

“my name is bufan. i’m a formidable demon of the Underworld!” his loud, deep ass voice boomed before leaning down his height to make eye contact with you

you felt your heart flutter a bit at how close he was

“that’s uh... nice...”

“just... nice....?”

“yeah....”

awkward silence

“so who are you and why did you summon me?” bufan questioned, raising a dark eyebrow at you

“oh! i’m (y/n). i kind of summoned you by accident,” you sheepishly admitted

“how do you accidentally summon a demon?”

“how do you accidentally trip and fall while getting summoned?”

“....”

damn you got him there

“anyway,” you coughed, “all i wanted to do was summon the spirit of my dead grandmother, not a demon. i’m not even sure why the spell summoned you in the first place. not to be rude or anything but can you go back to where you came from? I'm really busy and need to talk to my grandmother so i can start this cure already”

"i can't unless you give me your first born child"

“....say what now”

you gaped at his serious poker face before slowly watching it contort into a shit-eating grin. then he broke into a boisterous laughing fit that shook the whole room with its intensity

you pouted when you realized he was pulling your leg. “this is payback for earlier, isn’t it?”

he calmed himself down to a few chuckles, “i was just trying to break the ice. it’s not every day i get summoned to a cute little witch’s home”

you nearly forgot how much of a smooth talker demons were

blood rushed to your cheeks at his words

definitely not because he called you cute

(it definitely is)

“but i’m telling the truth when i say i can’t exactly go back. that’s not how this spell works. i’m already bounded to you by blood”

you wondered what he meant by ‘not how the spell works’

“the spell book doesn’t say anything about it either,” you sighed. “i guess that means you’re stuck with me for the time being- hey! be careful with that!”

you snatched a bottle of naga venom from bufan who already was snooping around at all of the magical ingredients and things around him

“you’re awfully calm. aren't you afraid i'll take your soul or something?" he says

"bold of you to assume I have a soul"

you were joking of course and he, being a demon, could sense that you indeed did have a soul and grinned at you

“just... try and behave yourself, ok?”

“i’ll be on my best behavior”

bufan was not on his best behavior

you should have known never to trust a demon smh

having bufan around was like taking care of three year old child

he’s constantly asking you questions every time you’re trying to make potions and just genuinely trying to annoy you

“(y/n), what’s that?”

“dragon’s breath”

“and that?”

“alicorn tears”

“this empty jar says teeth. who’s teeth?”

“it’s about to be yours in a second after i punch you in the jaw if you don’t stfu”

“are all you humans so snippy?”

“oh my god”

“more like oh my lucifer amirite”

you were a unicorn’s hair away from hexing him jfc

for someone so big, he was also extremely sneaky and sly

he’s always trying to play pranks on you and using his powers to his advantage

such as using his invisibility to randomly pop in front of you or poke your sides or face when you were doing something

or hiding your phone and other necessities all over the house and sending you on an entire scavenger hunt

despite his childish tendencies, bufan was also quite reliable 

for some reason, he grew to be protective of you although he knew you could protect yourself with your own powers

whenever you traveled home alone at night, he insisted on flying you home on his broad back

which you secretly loved bc flying with bufan was always fun since he would always make it feel like a roller coaster ride by flying in loops and various speeds

there were times where bufan even acted like a mother figure which was both intriguing and terrifying

“(y/n), did you eat yet?”

“no i don’t have any time to-”

*proceeds to make eight different types of meals for you*

in addition, he always had liver medicine on hand and you have no idea how or why???

whenever you were having a bad day, he never hesitated to listen to your problems even if they didn’t apply to him as a demon

over the next few months of bufan living with you, your once quiet and uneventful home was now constantly filled with laughter, annoyed yells, and bustle. you found yourself noticeably happier

but a part of you always wondered if your happiness was only one sided

“bufan,” you called out to him one day while fiddling with your wand

he made a grunting sound from the couch that was situated a few feet from you, indicating that he heard you and was listening

“do you regret being summoned by me?” you nervously asked

no answer

feeling your heart drop when he failed to respond, you assumed the worse and laughed quietly to hide the sadness in your heart

“it’s okay if you do. i wont hold it against you,” you nodded timidly

hearing his footsteps approach you, you faintly remember hearing your wand drop onto the floor before he pulled you close to him

you’ve never felt so tiny oml

“what makes you think i regret being here?” he questioned, clearly confused as to why you were suddenly bringing this up

you shrugged, “i don’t know... i mean, you were kind of forced to. do you miss being on your own?”

“do you?”

it took you a moment to quietly reply, “i’ve gotten used to feeling alone, so if you wanted to leave, i would let you”

bufan could hear the loneliness that lingered at the edge of your words. little did you know, he already knew how much you meant to him from the very first day he met you. there was no way it was an accident. he pulled you tighter to him before kissing the top of your head

“silly little witch. who says i’m going anywhere?”

you tilted your head up at him in surprise, “you’re saying that if you had the chance to leave, you wouldn’t take it?”

“you couldn’t get rid of me even if you wanted to”

and you swear that that was the moment you knew you had fallen for a demon

maybe performing that spell wasn’t a mistake after all

perhaps the universe knew that bufan was meant to be your loved one

because there was no better feeling than always coming home to a certain demon of yours

[coffee-for-himchan]

Awkward(ly) Cute Family Dinner  & Festive Preparations Gone Wrong with B.A.P

(A/N) So.. Let’s rant.

I know I originally made a poll, but, like.. Never again. Now I kinda feel guilty, because there were people who voted for these two that didn’t win as well, and now I felt like I had to write these too. I intended to do both setsof scenarios today, but yesterday evening I got sick with a fever and a sore throat. So, because I’m not feeling all that well, I decided to do a half-and-half instead, with hyung line having one scenario and maknae line the other.

A bit of a rollercoaster ride, but I hope you like it!! ^.^

Awkward(ly) Cute Family Dinner - hyung line

-YONGGUK-

“(Y/N) has told us how you’re the one writing lyrics for your group, and for your solos as well.”

That was a good thing, right? He simply looked over, answering something among the lines of “Aah, yes” , and took another forkful of the delicious meal your mother had prepared for the dinner.

“Say, I have listened to a few of those.. Where do you get inspiration to write such things?”

He almost choked on his food then and there.

His brain refused to cooperate as he tried to think of the right words to say, but could only stutter in return. Oh god, we was so bad at leaving first impressions, and that’s what made him so nervous, because he couldn’t mess this one up.

“So yeah, there’s different types of songs. For, let’s say, Wake Me Up displays how unrighteous and emotionless modern society had become, drowning out all that is creative and replacing it by neat copies of the same factory-sealed views and beliefs.”

“On the other hand, something like X is about a cute date I’d planned with your daughter, yet the only thing that turned out to be cute about it was the weak and pouty voice she called me in next morning because she was unable to move or walk after a night like that-”

He felt your fingers intertwining with his under the table, and took it as a “babe, you’re thinking and not speaking again.” So, clearing his throat, he tried to speak. Appropriately this time, that is. 

“There’s two recent singles - Honeymoon and Hands Up. Honeymoon displays my views on how life should be treated as a colorful thing, and how troubles can always somehow be overcome. Hands Up, on the other hand, is about believing in yourself and your dreams which is what I’ve tried to do since early age. All those lyrics are really just my thoughts put out on paper. Nothing more and nothing less.”

And as your parents looked satisfied with the answer and even told him how they thought he was well worded and with a quite right perception of the world, he let out a quiet, barely-there relieved sigh.

“See? Ain’t that hard,” you whispered to him, hearing him chuckle.

“My brain went straight to thinking about X though-”

“Yongguk-ah, don’t you dare!”

-HIMCHAN-

His confidence had been drained today, which didn’t help at all.

His smiles only seemed half as charming, and you knew it was because he was stressed. He was usually good at meeting people and leaving good impressions. Always talkative and fun, but he had one slight issue that always haunted him.

A mind full of insecurity and fears of saying wrong things, because he often let questionable phrases slip here and there, making brows rise at his statements.

“Himchan-ah,” you saw your parents engaging in their own conversation, and leaned over to him, whispering his name two times before finally catching his attention.

“Hey, are you alright-”

“Yeah, sure. Why wouldn’t I be?” he tried to force a smile, but you knew him better. If there was no eye dimple on display, there was no real smile there either.

“Stop stressing about it. Everything’s going nice. Just be yourself and they’ll love you,” you told him, and he nodded, trying his best to believe.

“How’s the dinner?” your mother asked after a while, earning praise for having cooked a really nice meal.

“How are you managing living with her, Himchan? Last time I checked, (Y/N)’s cooking wasn’t all that good-”

“Mom!” you shouted back, yet everyone was already chuckling at you and your lack of cooking ability.

“It’s not the worst either, actually,” Himchan answered, and you were glad that at least someone was on your side, “But, whenever I have time, I’m usually the one cooking anyways. Or we both do it together.”

“Ooh,” you heard your mother say, and saw as she threw your father a glance, “Do you hear? And all you keep telling me is that men can’t cook, which is why you won’t even try. There’s living proof sitting right across of you that they can.”

Chuckles filled the room again as your father admitted he might’ve been wrong, and as you glanced over at Himchan, you figured he was getting a little bit more at ease with the situation.

He was smiling, and the eye dimple was on full display. So all was going uphill.

-DAEHYUN-

“You’re so quiet,” you poked his side, laughing a little too loud as he jumped and almost dropped his fork on the plate.

“(Y/N), do I really have to scold you for giving Daehyun a hard time!?” your mother who had seen it all rose a brow at you, and you let out a happy protesting sound.

“But mom! He’s being so quiet I have to do something about it!! He’s actually the opposite of how he’d acting now!”

“I’m just a little nervous, it’s nothing,” he smiled a heartwarming smile at your mother, trying to read her facial expression.

He was holding back so hard from being his regular self. He knew you adored loud, annoying Daehyun, but he knew that this personality of his might come off as too easy-going and not proper enough. And he wanted to leave the right first impression, really.

“Don’t be. In fact, I might know a way to make it a little easier for you.”

You and Daehyun both leaned in to listen carefully. Your mom was up to something, as the second she started talking, you wanted to vanish from the table. Fall through the ground  Run away in shame or something - it didn’t matter. As long as you would get away from there as soon as possible.

“The way she poked you like that - there was this boy once when they were still in elementary school, and she was head-over-heels crushing on him-”

“Noo, mom, stop right there!! Please!!”

“So, and she always poked him like this, magically thinking that it was a way of showing affection or something. I even got calls from the teachers to make her stop doing it, because she was annoying the poor lad so much he didn’t want to go to school-”

“Mooom, stop embarrassing me! I really didn’t know how love worked back then, okay!?” you cried out, hiding your face in your hands.

“Looks like you still don’t know how it works. You poke me all the time,” Daehyun chuckled, and your reflexes made you poke him so he would shut up.

Laughs filled the room at your initial reaction, and, even though you were beyond embarrassed, you saw how Daehyun was slowly turning to show his true colors. And that was all that mattered, even though it was achieved through digging up repressed memories.

Festive Preparations Gone Wrong - maknae line

-YOUNGJAE-

“Youngjae-ah.. What do you mean by “I kinda ruined the tree?””

“N-nothing,” he flashed you a smile, yet his frantic tries to not let you into the living room, blocking the door with his whole frame and outstretched hands made it pretty bloody obvious something had gone terribly wrong. If it wouldn’t have, he would be his normal, slightly cocky and charismatic self.

“It looks like you’re trying to hide something from me though,” you smirked, taking a step closer and seeing how he flinched a little, “Or are my eyes fooling me?”

“They probably are, because all is fine and I’m acting completely normal..” he looked away, scratching the back of his head and squirming when your arms wrapped around his neck lightly.

“You seem so tense,” you cooed at him, face at an inappropriately close distance, playing him in a way he never refused to be played because he loved it so damn much, “Let me help you with it.”

Without any chance to pull away - and without any desire to do so - he felt your lips pressing onto his in a soft and firm fashion at first. Yet as your hands tangled into his hair and your tongue moved mischievously, asking to be let in, he kind of lost control. His mind fogged, and he let himself be lead by you, not noticing how one of your hands sneakily trailed down his body and went past him, reaching for the door knob, opening the door without a single sound.

“How’s that?” you stared up at him with dreamy eyes, biting your lip to prevent any laughter from escaping you.

“Absolutely amazing-”

“Yeah, unlike your tree,” you said, and only now he realized you’d opened the door, and frantically turned around to face the living room, with you wrapping your arm around his waist and joining in.

“How did you even-”

“Don’t ask. I tried to place the star, and it wouldn’t stand straight. So I cut the tree a little, but it was still crooked when I put it on. And then I had to cut a few top branches, because it looked stupid, and… And yeah, here we are. I’m aware it looks stupid. I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be,” he heard you say, and looked at you in confusion, “At least it’s original. I’ve never had such a weirdly shaped tree, but, like.. It’s fine. It will make me laugh out loud every time I look at it.”

“Thank god, I thought you’d kill me,” he sighed in relief, causing you to chuckle.

-JONGUP-

All went fine, until you heard a quiet, cracking noise. And all lights, accompanied by all electronics in the house, went out.

“Jongup-ah!!” you called for him, yet at the same time his name left your lips, you heard him groan in the other room.

“Jongup-ah, forget it,” you told him as you appeared in the living room doorway, your phone’s flashlight directed at his frame that was seated on the floor, tangled in Christmas lights.

“I told you that you can’t possibly put this many lights on at the same time.”

“Oh, I somehow will,” he sounded as annoyed as ever, and you only chuckled at him and his desperate tries to make the room look like Christmas paradise. Leaving him to be, you didn’t think much when you went back into the kitchen. You thought he would wander back outside to fix the electricity, and would come back to try and connect too many electronics for the electricity network to handle, constantly making it break down again. Yet as darkness was still there after circa ten minutes, you started worrying.

“Jongup-ah-” you had wandered outside to take a look at what he was doing just to see sparks flying everywhere out of the switchboard.

“Nope, nope, nope, forget it,” he quietly muttered and hurried over to your side, watching the last few sparks flying by and, as everything had gone silent, sighing in defeat.

“See, what did I tell you?”

“The truth, I guess,” he scratched the back of his head, peaking out of the doorway to throw the switchboard a final look, “But it doesn’t really matter. I messed up and we’re left without electricity for Christmas.”

He sighed, hanging his head down low. You could easily see right through him - he was blaming himself, which, to be honest, was right - he was to blame. Yet you didn’t want him to feel bad, because, after all, his intentions were good.

“Hey, look at it from the bright side,” you wrapped your arms around his waist, making him direct his full attention at you, “I have some lights that run on batteries lying around. And tons of candles. The dinner had been made already, and we can go have, like, a romantic meal or something instead of the regular boring Christmas dinner.”

And he looked beyond grateful for such a turn of events, giving you a sweet little kiss and tons of gratefulness in the form of hugs, “thank you’s” and smiles.

-JUNHONG-

“So.. How much do you love me?”

You looked at him, all alarms immediately kicking off at his innocently fluttering eyes and his little, mischievous smile

“I’m about to love you a little less than I did, or so it seems,” your stare that followed him around as he made his way to you looked suspicious, and he chuckled nervously, wrapping his arms around you and swinging your frames from side to side.

“You won’t,” he gave you a cute eskimo kiss before giving you the real thing, “You’ll always love me just as much.”

“Even after you..”

“.. Even after I burned the chicken in the oven.”

You groaned, hearing another nervous chuckle escape him. He was such.. Such a disaster in the kitchen. Why did you even leave him there to take care of dinner?

“Remind me again, why did I leave a kid unattended in the kitchen?” you questioned, seeing as he pouted at being called a kid, “Because I really don’t remember. Aah, Junhong-ah.. Why are you so.. I don’t know.. Clumsy? Inattentive? You know what I mean.”

“Yeah, I know,” he looked away, and you saw guilt straining his eyes, “I don’t know. It just happened, and I’m sorry.”

“Eh, I know you are,” you told him, scooting closer and burying your face in his chest as he smiled and tightened his grip, “I was just kinda looking forwards to chicken. But mistakes happen. Don’t break your head and heart over it.”

As you stood there with him, realization about something else hit you.

“Junhong-ah.. You did take the burned chicken out and turn off the oven, right?”

“I.. Guess,” he stared back cluelessly as you eyes widened, “I don’t remember.”

“You have to be kidding me,” you escaped his grip, hurrying to the kitchen in order to check and being closely followed by him and his stream of apologies.

“Junhong-ah, do you wanna burn the house down or what!?”

[thesecretfandom]

Dirty Devil -- Bughead

Word Count: 2,020

Rated: E

A/N: Another Halloween fic for your enjoyment! Featuring Jughead being really cute with kids. (Read on AO3)

"Trick or Treat!"

Jughead dropped a mini bag of M&Ms into three multicolored plastic pumpkins. The children, a witch, a kitten, and a basketball player, squealed out a thank you and turned to skip down the front porch steps.

"Betty, do we have any more candy? We're all out."

"Sorry, babe!" Betty called from the couch. "Fresh out, but it's late. I don't think we'll be getting many more trick-or-treaters tonight. Just turn off the porch light."

Jughead flipped off the light and set the empty candy bowl on the kitchen counter. Betty had Hocus Pocus playing on the TV, but the final scene was playing. As usual, Betty had tears in her eyes. He would never understand how that movie always got to her.

"Juggie, I need a hug." Betty flopped over the back of the couch.

"I'm not sure that's appropriate. I'm not sure that the devil…" He pointed to his costume. "Should be hugging an angel."

Betty hopped over the back of the couch and swung her hips as she walked to where Jughead stood in the kitchen. "When did you become such a strict rule follower?"

"You've changed me Betty Cooper, made an honest man out of me." His hands moved to Betty's hips as she walked up to him.

"Just shut up and kiss me you dirty devil."

Jughead didn't have to be asked twice. He dipped his head to meet Betty's lips. Her hands trailed to his neck and tugged on his hair. Betty knew how to get him worked up, and this was a surefire way to do it. She bit down on his bottom lip, pulling out a moan.

"You are a bad angel."

"You have no idea."

"Betty, we've been dating for six years. I think I have some idea…"Jughead smirked against her lips and let his hands roam to her ass. Betty jumped, wrapping her legs around Jughead's torso. Their lips crashed together once more as Jughead carried her into their bedroom and threw her down on the bed.

"Ooh…" Betty rolled onto her stomach. "The angel wings are digging into my back."

Jughead crawled above her, his legs straddling her backside as he bent down to kiss her neck. "So, we're doing it this way then?"

"Or you could help me take the wings off."

"That's way too easy…" His lips moved to her ear. "And this is way too much fun."

Jughead slipped his hands under Betty's skirt, his fingers circling the skin of her thighs, drifting ever so slowly to the edge of her panties.  His lips followed the line of her neck, sweeping down to her shoulder.

"Ow, Jug. Your horns are stabbing me." Betty reached back and pulled the horns from his head.

"That's not the only thing that's horny." Jughead said. Betty could practically see the smirk that crossed his lips.

A sudden, brisk, series of knocks came from the front door and Betty jumped. Jughead didn't stop his movements, however, and slipped his fingers under her panties. More knocks came from the door.

"You remembered to turn off the porch light, right?" Betty breathed.

"Yeah, of course."

"Then who's…?" Betty started.

"Betty?" She recognized the voice calling from the other side of the door. "Jughead? Are you home?"

"It's Polly!" Betty pulled her skirt down and pushed Jughead away. She hurried out of the bed and threw Jughead's costume horns back at him. "Quick, back in character. She'll have the twins with her."

Betty pranced to the doorway and opened the door.

"Trick or treat!" The twins spoke in tandem.

"Hey kiddos… we're fresh out of candy, but can we interest you in two steaming cups of hot chocolate?"

"Yay! Thanks Auntie Betty!" The kids sprinted past Betty, leaving their mother in the doorway. "Uncle Juggie!"

The kids found Jughead coming out of the bedroom and jumped into his arms. Betty would never understand why those kids liked Jughead so much more. Sometimes they even called him 'Fun Juggie'.

"So, I hear Auntie Betty promised you hot chocolate. How about you come pick out what mug you want to use?"

"Yay!" Jughead lifted both of them and led them to the cabinets.

"Uncle Juggie. What happened to your pumpkin? Why is only Auntie Betty's outside?"

Jughead glanced at Betty, who shot him a knowing glance. She was interested to hear his response.

"Well. Mr. Lantern… his friends called him Jack, was a strong warrior and the Pumpkin King needed him to fight in his army to protect all of his subjects… the squash, the zucchini, the eggplant. Mr. Lantern was a real hero. He got injured in battle and his doctor put him on bed rest." The kids gave sad faces, mourning Mr. Lantern. "But don't worry. By next year, he'll be ready for Halloween again."

While Jughead told his story, Betty put a kettle of water on the stove and pulled her sister into a hug. It had been a few weeks since they'd seen each other. She wasn't even sure Polly would make it to their house to trick-or-treat tonight.

"So, Polls. You guys are here kind of late. What's going on?"

"I know… and I'm so sorry. The kids insisted on stopping at every single house on the street, and they wanted to come here last. I'll make sure the kids hurry up. It's way past their bedtime."

"Polly, it's fine. I love seeing the kids… and it's Halloween, they shouldn't have a bedtime on Halloween."

The kettle was just short of boiling when Betty pulled it from the stovetop. Jughead had already sat the kids down at the table and had filled their mugs with chocolate powder.

"Hey, fingers out. Those are dry marshmallows, don't eat them."

"Hot water, coming through!" Betty poured the water and she and Jughead stirred the mixture for the kids. It took an excessive amount of time to get the kids to drink their hot chocolate, to the point that it had become luke-warm chocolate. Jughead had to carry the kids to the car, each falling asleep in his arms before he got them to their car seats.

Midnight was fast approaching when Betty hugged her sister goodbye and returned to her bedroom. Betty pulled her angel wings off her shoulders and threw her halo onto the floor beside the bed. She fell back against her many decorative pillows and slid her panties down, kicking them off her ankles. Her hands seemed to move on their own accord, fingers gliding slowly across the lace and tulle of her white dress. Fingers pressed into the wetness beneath her skirt, rubbing slow circles.

Jughead's tall figure appeared, silhouetted in the door frame. He leaned against the door frame, arms crossed over his chest. In the dim light Betty could just see him raise an eyebrow.

"Starting without me?" Jughead stepped slowly into the room.

"Since we were so rudely interrupted…" Betty moved to her knees and crawled to the end of the bed. She grabbed Jughead around the back of his neck and pulled his body tight against hers. "I was eager to get started."

"And you're sure you want to let this dirty ol' devil defile you?" He teased, arms moving to her waist.

"There's a little bad in every good girl." Betty pulled Jughead so his lips brushed hers, ever so slightly. "Now are you gonna do something about it?"

A sinful smirk played on the corners of his mouth. Jughead pushed Betty back onto the bed and crawled on top of her. His hands immediately slid under her skirt, picking up where Betty had left off. His fingers moved knowingly, familiar with how his girl liked to be pleasured. He slipped in his middle finger first, earning a gasp from Betty.

Betty's hands roamed Jughead's body, pulling pieces of his costume and depositing them on the floor. First went the horns, followed by the devil's tail hooked to the back of his jeans. Those were really the only elements of his costume, so she began tugging at his bright red shirt.

As Betty pulled the shirt over his head, Jughead pulled his arms away from her. His hands immediately moved back under her skirt and pushed the fabric up her thighs.  Betty rolled over, onto her stomach.

"Unzip… I don't want to rip the dress."

Jughead moved his large fingers to pull at the dainty tab, slowly pulling it down her back. She arched her back so Jughead could pull the fabric up her body until he exposed her bra. He made quick work with the clasp. Removing the bra, he grabbed her breasts and pulled her back into his chest.

"How do you want it?"

"Just like this Juggie." Betty wiggled her ass, pressing back into Jughead's crotch, unfortunately still clothed. "Stop teasing."

Warm lips moved to her neck, but Jughead moved one hand to pull at the button on his jeans. He maneuvered himself out of the ridiculous red skinny jeans Betty had bought for the occasion and was left only in his boxers, which were soon disposed of.

"Just like this?" Jughead repeated.

"That's how you wanted it earlier… so quit wasting time."

Jughead didn't. He reached into his bedside drawer and pulled out a condom. In one quick movement he ripped open the package and rolled it on. Betty was still writhing beneath him, her ass pressing against his hard cock.

Jughead pressed into her slowly, short even thrusts as he moved both hands back to her breasts. Betty whined when he pinched her nipples, and he felt them harden beneath his touch. Not for the first time, Jughead was grateful that Betty had taken ballet lessons and was so flexible.  

He moved one hand to her cheek and pulled her to face him. Her torso twisted in a way that he couldn't begin to understand, but at the moment he didn't care. Jughead pressed his lips to Betty's, tasting the bittersweet chocolate from their drinks earlier. He could never get enough of her. He wanted to taste all of the skin on her body, but her lips were the sweetest. He would trade anything for a kiss from his gorgeous girlfriend. As much as he loved to touch her, to fuck her… her kiss was his kryptonite.

Betty seemed to notice Jughead taking his time… daydreaming. She was starting to press back against him, eagerly begging for more. So Jughead snapped out of it. Her lips would be there later, so he pulled away from her lip and let his arms rest on either side of her head.

He thrust deep into her and immediately pulled almost all the way out before pressing in again. His thrusts were speeding up by the second. His thighs slapped against Betty's backside, the sound filling the room.

"Oh, fuck Juggie. Don't stop… don't ever st-ah!" Her words turned to breathy moans when Jughead thrust sharply. "Right… there."

Jughead kept the pace, thrusting over and over again. He hit the same spot each time and Betty slowed unraveled. Sweat was beading on her back, mixing with that on Jughead's chest as he pressed down into her. His body was heavy on top of hers, but he couldn't be bothered to hold himself up.

His thrusts were becoming more erratic as he neared his high. Betty's fingers gripped the bed sheets when Jughead finally let go. Betty writhed behind him, still seeking her orgasm. Jughead slipped a finger down to her throbbing core and began to rub furiously as he thrust into her, riding out his high.

When Betty's breath hitched in her throat he knew she was done. She clenched around his dick, filthy moans escaping her lips.

"Oh… ohhh." Her body went limp beneath his and Jughead pulled out and rolled to the side. His legs remained intertwined with hers and one hand rested on the small of her back.

"You were pretty gentle for a minute there… for a devil I mean." Betty's soft smile betrayed her teasing.

"Yeah well…there's a little good in every bad boy."

--------------------------------------------------------------

A/N: Let me know what you thought of this one. Thinking maybe one more fic before Halloween gets here? Thanks for reading.

[netrunnerconduit]

Smoke’s Last Show

The screen flicked from black to neon green mixed with pink. Smoke's logo, an obnoxious smiling face that turned to smoke, faded in on top of the garish background.

“Good evening ladies and gentlemen, bio-roids and clones, naturals and synthetics, and everyone in between. Welcome to tonight's episode of Net Mercur, the only show NBN doesn't want you to watch! We've got a very special program for you tonight. I, your gracious, magnanimous, and certainly clever host will be doing a live speedrun on Jack Weyland's private servers in outer space. We're going to be breaking laws and breaking hearts tonight, and I got a good feeling we'll break Mac's number one in the world record too. But first let's take a look at the rig I'll be using:”

Black again, then some lights coalesced into the wispy silhouette of a cat. “This lil' cutie is the first of my breakers, first in my heart, and first in this morning's Net Mercur Subscribers' poll as to what you wanted to see me use on this speedrun. Remember paid subscribers get exclusive access to all sorts of great bonus content, including these polls. Now this is something of a rescue I saved from some stimheads down in La Costa but let me tell you her code is robust. I've spent all afternoon tinkering with her I'm very excited to see what kind of damage this kitty can do now that I've reclawed her. She's certainly bad luck for any sysop that crosses her path.”

The cat on the screen growled and then pounced through the camera.

Next an explosion of virtual sparks illuminated the screen then died out. Again the sparks exploded but now the camera pulled back to reveal a massive cylinder of light crashing down with immense energy creating the bursts of sparks.

“Now this here's a real treat for you that my own R&D group cooked up. This breaker is some industrial level shit and it will level the entire server to get past a gotcha bot. In fact I got a dummy server rigged up here with some *ahem borrowed corporate ice, just so you can really get an idea of how much fuckin damage this thing can do. I've put three, yes that's right three, top of the line, corporate bullies back to back to back for... demonstration purposes. Remember kids, DO try this at home, school and anywhere else with a net connection.

The cylinder rotated ninety degrees and accelerated to ramming speed passing effortlessly through some cyber constructs, shattering them completely.

“Oh ho ho, that was brutal. I cannot wait to drop this bad boy on some ice that can actually feel pain.” “To round out this trio I brought in something professional, because while I am serious about putting on a good show for you I am also serious about my own safety online. And I'm serious about wanting to break Mac's record! So feast your eyes on something real juicy.” The screen remained black, but the blackness seemed to shift and move in subtle shades. Suddenly a bright clear blade of light flashed across the screen and disappeared, resheathed in the void. “Did you see that?! This is what the pros use, obviously, because I'm using it and I'm the only pro you know. It's practically undetectable and it just provides targeted assassinations of any piece of code that so much as pings me funny. Normally you wouldn't be able to get your hands on something like this. I only got  it because I know people who know people. That's right, even the pro runners are fans of my casts, and I mean why wouldn't they be?”

“Last but not least, I'll be running these killas, thrillas, and chillas, off some top of the line hardware. You all know my lovely console: 128 pentabytes of processing power, basically infinite amounts of memory, and just like me she's got super-coolant ice running through her veins.” “Alright we're about ready to get this show on the road. Let's go over the rules: Today's targets are Jack Weyland's private servers in remote orbit. To prove we done the deed we have to both take something and leave something. I got this handy-dandy little 'fuck you' some of the trashiest, nastiest, little virus that we're going to gift to Mr. Beanstalk. Hopefully it doesn't jettison his O2 supply into deep space, or hopefully it does, I don't really care. Mac's current, and the world's record is twenty-two minutes, thirty-five seconds, seventy-eight milliseconds, and fifty nanoseconds. The timer starts when I first log in. I also need a witness to verify that I beat Mac's record and I figure vidding it to the entire network should be good enough. For all you code babies out there I'll try to keep you all in the loop as to what's going on, but I am going to be pretty deep in the tank on this run. Let's get to it, shall we?” A three second countdown flashed on the screen. Two. One. A rush of colours and shapes blossomed into as Smoke connected to the Network. “And we're off! First step is we gotta find a connection from Earth to Mars, that's easy. This is a Weyland-themed run so we'll bounce through Blue Sun's servers to go from earth to Luna and Luna to Mars. Oh if you didn't see that, that was a piece of trash ice that garbage sysops run and that my kitten just put in its rightful place in the slagheap. I could erase everyone's electricity bills while I'm in here, but that's not what we're doing today. Anyways we're on Luna now so I'm going to be getting almost a full second of lag, but that's no problem for me. Best way to deal with this is to read just be able to read the future, like I can. Alright here's some ice with some teeth, let's knock them out shall we? Ooh that looked like it hurt, and it hurt the guy behind him too. Anyways so we're on Mars now, the latency is getting bad, but it's only going to get worse the deeper we go. From here we gotta go through Weyland's Martian HQ which will be about the only server receiving direct transmissions from Jacky-boy's deep space station. We're going to piggy-back one of those signals to get to the finish line. We're at, let's see, eight and a half minutes so we are making excellent time. Now they don't got laws on Mars against the dangerous ice that can cause permanent brain damage so we gotta be real careful here. Or we would if all there ice were still alive to do some damage. Didn't see that coming did ya? We're into Weyland's 'secure' Martian deep space communications but before I start the piggy back, remember when I mentioned the latency? Well it's basically unfeasible past this point so I have to set my breakers to launch a little preemptive strike once we hit the space station. But with these beasts daddy-Weyland won't know what hit him. Let's lock down this puppy. We're piggy-backing the signal. Wait for it. And bang! Uh what's going on here. Where's the damage? Where's the ice? Fuck I can't do anything. What is that?” The screen which had been a nigh-incomprehensible blur of colours and motion halted jaggedly. A wall of eyes opened up and no matter which way the camera turned it was always being watched. The breakers launched themselves violently at the offending pupils but simply phased through harmlessly. Meanwhile Smoke started yelling.

“Shit! Kill the feed, jack me out! Shit they know where we are. Oh fuck, we're tagged. Someone get me ou-” The audio went dead and the camera stopped moving, but for anyone still watching the cast the walls of unblinking eyes stared on. Half an hour later the vid-feed finally died out too.

Smoke stopped the recording, finished emptying the Net Mercur Subscribers' Account of credits and started wiping her presence from all the hardware. “My best performance yet, but it's time I moved on.”

[louisvuittontrashbags]

Chocobros x Reader--For Your Entertainment: Prologue

You guys voted and courtesan fic won for the 300 followers celebration poll! This will be a 4-part series, and will cover Gladio, Prompto, Ignis, and Noctis in that order, with Noctis being the finale. This will be a fic about the reader, but the prologue is from Noct’s perspective. No sex yet, but Chapter 1 and every chapter after that will be smut. Hope you guys enjoy and thanks for your support, always <3. And because people really don’t seem to see this, I want to out and out state it: the woman has absolutely no descriptors because I want the readers to be able to fill themselves in. So whatever your skin color or body type, hair length, all that... it seems like some people are still convinced we ( @hypaalicious @diabolik-trash-heap ) are only writing a specific kind of character and that’s just not what’s happening here. I mean maybe I’m excluding bald people because I need a little bit of hair to be pulled but I feel like that’s a small concession lol. ANYWAY WITHOUT FURTHER RAMBLING, I PRESENT FOR YOUR ENTERTAINMENT: PROLOGUE

--------

After weeks of preparation, the big day had finally arrived… the young prince Noctis was set to depart for Altissia to marry the lady Lunafreya, after one last road trip with his friends and crownsguard.

As Noctis descends the stairs to the Regalia, his eyes alight on the figure of a woman standing just to the side of the car with the Marshall, Cor Leonis. She smiles pleasantly at Noctis, and he scowls in return. He can hear the whispers of his companions behind him.

“Who’s that girl?”

“Friend of yours, Noct?”

“Did you have a girlfriend all this time and we didn’t know it?!”

The prince’s hands curl into fists at his side.

“Why are you doing this?!”

Regis furrows his brow. “I’m not doing anything—this was always part of the plan. Courtesans are a time-honored tradition of this court, and as your wedding won’t take place here alternate arrangements must be made.”

“This was supposed to be the last thing I got to do on my own… and I can’t even have this now.”

The king’s face softens.

“Noct, please reconsider. Your trip will still be everything you hoped it would be… you’ll just have one more person along for the ride.”

“And what if I don’t use her?”

“Then I expect you’ll disappoint your new wife on your wedding night… but that’s your decision to make. All I can do is guide you in the right direction.”

“I won’t touch her… I won’t speak to her… I won’t even look at her.”

“Your loss then. But I expect you to treat her with the minimum courtesy you’d afford to anyone else—I will not have my son disrespecting a woman in our care.”

“Whatever.”

Cor gives the distant figure of the king a respectful bow, then waves the boys forward.

“Don’t dawdle, gentlemen. You’ve got a long way to go.”

Prompto is the first to approach the woman, throwing his arm out for a handshake.

“Hi!! I don’t think we’ve met… I’m Prompto!”

The woman takes his hand graciously.

“I don’t believe we have, though I know who you are. I’m _________.”

Prompto laughs nervously. “You know who I am?!”

The woman smiles again, and the sight of it churns Noct’s stomach. Who does she think she is?

“Everyone in court knows the famous Prompto Argentum… it’s an honor.”

Noctis steps forward, cutting in before Prompto can respond.

“Quit wasting time. You can make your introductions in the car.”

Ignis says nothing, but places a warning hand on Noct’s shoulder. He shrugs it off irritably.

“She’s coming with us?!” Prompto yelps.

Gladio grins. “Well… I wasn’t expecting to have a lady along, but I can’t say I mind.”

You fucking wouldn’t. Noctis opens the passenger door and takes a seat in the back, slamming the car door shut with all the grace of a toddler throwing a tantrum. Cor looks at Noct, then decides perhaps he should stay out of this one. He opens the door for the woman with a small bow, and to Noct’s horror the woman climbs in next to him. He moves as far as he can from her and gazes sullenly out over the side of the car, chin in his hand.

Gladio shrugs, entering the vehicle and seating himself next to the woman. Prompto hops into the front seat, but he turns to look at their new companion with an excited smile. Ignis pushes his glasses up his nose with one gloved finger.

“Please sit properly, Prompto. ______, it’s a pleasure to have you along. Ignis Scientia.”

“I know you too, of course. The pleasure is all mine, Mr. Scientia.”

“Please, just Ignis will do.”

Gladio drapes an arm casually across the woman’s shoulders.

“Gladiolus Amicitia. If you haven’t heard of me too, I’m sure we’ll know each other real well by the time this trip is done.”

The woman giggles, and the sound makes Noct’s eyes roll involuntarily.

“I’m quite familiar with you, Mr. Amicitia.”

“You can call me Gladio… but I can’t say I don’t like the sound of Mr. Amiciti-”

“Ignis, put some music on.”

Noct’s tone is loud and pointed, and the car settles into an awkward silence. Ignis turns the stereo on, and for a few moments the only sound is the jaunty music coming through the Regalia’s speakers.

Gladio takes the woman’s wrist gently in his large hand, examining it. “That’s an interesting tattoo… what’s it mean?”

“It’s the symbol of our order. This part here signifies the Lucian court specifically. We get this tattoo once we’ve completed our training, which takes several years.”

Prompto turns in his seat again, pulling the woman’s wrist towards him to examine the tattoo himself. She sits forward to allow him easier access “Ooh, what kind of training?”

Ignis looks down for a moment, then returns his eyes to the road. “She’s a courtesan.”

Prompto frowns. “A what?”

Noctis mutters darkly. “A royal hooker.”

Ignis glares at Noctis in the rearview mirror. “Noctis!”

The woman smiles. “A common misconception. You can think of me as a trained companion, Mr. Argentum.”

Prompto flushes. “Please just call me Prompto… I’m not some fancy blueblood.”

“You’re no less deserving of respect than your friends, Prompto. But as you wish.”

Gladio turns to the woman with a mischievous glint in his eye.“So what kind of training do they give you exactly?”

“Oh, all sorts of things… the arts, literature, dance, music, conversation…”

“Anything else?”

“Is there anything in particular you want to ask me about, Gladio?”

“You know what I’m getting at.”

“Do I?”

Gladio laughs. “Alright, alright. Sex.”

The woman tucks a strand of hair behind her ear and flutters her lashes at the large man.

“It wouldn’t be appropriate for me to reveal all the secrets of our order… I’ll just have to let you wonder about that.”

Prompto fidgets uncomfortably front seat, rubbing the back of his neck in embarrassment. “Is this like a bachelor party thing?”

The woman shakes her head. “Courtesans have always been a part of the court of Lucis. The King simply wanted to ensure that Prince Noctis would have the opportunity to prepare for his wedding night just as his predecessors have done for generations.”

“I won’t be, so you’re here for nothing.” Noctis stares at the road.

“Well, uh… the King say anything about the rest of us making use of your services?” Gladio crosses his arms over his chest casually.

The woman places a gentle hand on Gladio’s muscular forearm.

“I’m here to serve the future King and his court. If the King does not wish to engage me, then I will simply count myself lucky for the opportunity to travel with him and his companions.”

Prompto turns around to face forward, but the back of his neck is bright red. Gladio laughs.

“Well now… this trip’s gonna be even more fun than I thought.”

[artificialqueens]

But I'm A Cheerleader! - Chapter 14 (Aja x Farrah) - Millie

A/N: since I’m indecisive, I created a poll for you guys to vote on which team you think should win the football season and why (optional). Vote here.

This week’s game had been long awaited. Over the past few weeks, it was looking as if the Bombers were going to take the trophy this year, with their wins quickly stacking up. Today was the third game before the final, and this was always where things started to heat up - even the cheerleaders were nervous, Sasha, in particular.

“Seriously, I’m scared!” she repeated to Aja for the fourth time. All the girls were standing under the bleachers, pom-poms anxiously clutched in their hands. The teams had slowly begun to integrate over the course of the past month of two, and now both shared their nervous conversations beforehand.

“Sasha, it’ll be perfectly alright,” Aja reassured. “We’re not the ones playing, remember?”

“Still,” Sasha said, “I want them to do well. This’ll reflect on us, too.”

Aja grabbed her shoulders. “Don’t worry about it,” she said. “It’ll be fine, no matter who wins.”

Sasha pulled her into a hug. “God, I hope so. I don’t know why I’m freaking out so much.”

“Just… don’t think about it too much.” They both pulled away and Sasha nodded.

“Guys, get in line,” Shea hissed. “We’re about to go on.”

Everyone did as they were told; Aja nervously approached the front of the line so she could lead them on, with the others obediently following behind her. Sasha looked up at her girlfriend with desperate eyes, and Shea’s expression instantly softened. She gently kissed Sasha’s forehead and smiled at her, a silent reassurance that quietened her panic. All of them tended to get in their own heads when it came to this game, it just so happened that Sasha was more vocal about it.

When the cheering from the crowd above them started, they knew that was their cue to come on. Aja took a deep breath and held tightly to her pom-poms, and pranced out from behind the purple and orange striped curtain that closed them off from the field. The applause suddenly became louder once they’d entered, and it filled them all with adrenaline. Somehow each time they came out here, they felt like it was their first.

“Okay, folks,” Mr. Mathews said over the speakers. “Overall, the B-52 Bombers have the most game wins, but RuPaul’s Glamazons are only a couple behind.”

The cheerleaders got into their starting positions, Aja standing proudly at the front with the rest of the Glamazons behind her, and the Bombers at the side anticipating their turn. In all honesty, the routine had been performed to exhaustion, but they still had fun with it.

“There are only two more games, this being one of them, until the final,” he continued. The crowd oohed with a twinge of sarcasm. “And with that, let’s begin!” He blew the whistle and the already-lined up footballers began to play, determination in their eyes.

-

“And, it’s a victory for RuPaul’s Glamazons!” Mr. Mathews congratulated, rising out of his chair to clap and cheer. Everyone sitting in the bleachers followed suite, standing up to applaud the end of the game. The Glamazons pulled each other into a tight squeeze, screaming hysterically. Even though it wasn’t them who were playing, they still felt as if they’d won, too. Sasha looked far more relaxed; to be fair, they all did.

“Guys, we did it!” Jaymes exclaimed with a squeal. “Well, the footballers did.”

“It’s still a victory,” Nina said, a broad smile on her face.

“This is our first win in, like, three weeks?!” Aja added, the statement only bringing her shock after she’d said it aloud.

“I guess this calls for-” Charlie began, but was cut off by an ecstatic Shea.

“No parties, no drinking,” she said. “I want us to remember tonight, at least for now. Why don’t we all come back to mine? It’s been a while since we’ve just hung out like normal.” She looked around the group for the others’ approval, which she received immediately.

Aja tensed up a little. She’d turned down invites too many times for her excuses to pass anymore, and besides, she’d hate to leave Farrah walking home alone. She was at a crossroads.

“Sorry, I’m meeting Kandy soon,” she lied.

“Come on, please?” Sasha begged. “We never see you outside of school anymore.”

“I can come by later…?” she offered. “I won’t be that long.”

Sasha’s lips were pressed into a firm line. She stared Aja down for a second before saying something.

“Sure,” she said. The celebratory atmosphere had quickly fizzled out as her friends exited the stadium, leaving her trailing behind a couple of metres. Aja felt a sharp sting in her heart.

She waited anxiously under the bleachers, just hidden from view by the drawn curtain. Keeping secrets from her friends always ate her up inside, and the guilt just festered on her thoughts. Disloyalty was one of her biggest pet peeves.

Farrah found her a couple of minutes later once all their friends had cleared out. The stadium had just begun releasing people, but no one paid that close attention to anything at the sides; the two could talk safely.

“Congratulations on the win,” Farrah said, smiling up at Aja.

Aja returned the smile weakly, responding with a simple, “Thanks.”

Farrah’s grin faded. “What’s wrong?” she asked, running her hand along Aja’s shoulder. “Did something happen?”

She looked down at her feet, playing with the hem of her shirt. “We need to tell our friends that we’re close,” she said. She looked back up at her, and there was a look of confusion plastered on her face.

“Why the sudden change of thoughts?” Farrah asked, stopping her movements.

“I can’t balance things anymore,” Aja said. “My excuses don’t work. They’re clearly pissed.”

“I’ve been thinking the same thing…” Farrah admitted. “It’s just… aren’t you afraid of them reacting badly? I’m terrified.” She looked down at the ground.

“Of course I am!” Aja exclaimed. “But if I lose them, then I’d rather lose them being honest than keeping a secret.” Aja would never be willing to give up a friend, whether she’d known them for years, or just a few months. But if she didn’t come forward now, the universe would make her choose one person over another.

“You won’t lose them, okay?” Farrah assured, and resumed stroking her shoulder. “It won’t be as bad as we think.”

“Can we just leave here?” Aja pleaded. “I want to go home.”

“Sure,” she said, and they blended into the crowd. As they were walking, Farrah slipped her hand into Aja’s and gave it a tight squeeze.

-

It was now, or never.

Aja had never felt so confident yet so incredibly anxious walking to someone’s house, and the way she was moving probably made her look like a newborn giraffe. All the possible outcomes played through her mind, but the one that came forward the most was complete and utter rejection. But honesty was something she cherished, and was probably her only motivation right now.

Farrah had made a vow alongside hers to tell the Bombers as well, and if all went swimmingly, the two teams could maybe become even closer. After all, who could deny Farrah something when she gave them That Look? Aja was slowly becoming immune to it, but there were always times where she’d give in.

At last, she arrived at Shea’s house, and her surroundings were deadly quiet; she spotted a faint glow of light from her bedroom at the front of the house, and heard some faint speaking. She knocked at the door and the speaking stopped, and in a matter of seconds Shea was at the door. Her eyes widened when she saw Aja, but quickly fixed her expression to mask her shock.

“You weren’t with Kandy for long, then?” she asked.

“Well, about that,” Aja replied, and Shea raised a sculpted brow. “I’ll explain once I’m inside.”

Shea stepped to the side to let her through, and they both went back upstairs. The other five girls all turned their heads toward the door when Aja greeted them, some doing their best to feign a neutral expression.

“Can I talk to you all about something?” Aja asked, sitting down on the swivel chair at Shea’s desk. “Two things, actually.” Now she was here, she might as well have been fully true to herself. She was going to come out first, and save her confessions for second.

“Go ahead,” Sasha said. For the first time in a month, she looked at Aja with hope in her eyes.

She took a deep breath. “Well, this is something I’ve wanted to tell you all for a while,” she began, “and I figured a couple of seconds ago that now is a good time. I’m…” She paused for a second and took another deep breath, daring to look up at her friends. They all looked concerned for her except Sasha, who had a giant smile on her lips. “I’m gay.”

Sasha immediately leaped up from Shea’s bed and engulfed Aja in a hug, and her whole body was filled with relief. The remainder clapped awkwardly, unsure of how to react. However, if her next statement was taken badly, Aja was sure that that would be the last hug her and Sasha would ever share, and the final feeling of acceptance that she’d receive from them.

“I’m proud of you,” Shea said, a beaming smile on her face to match Sasha’s.

Sasha pulled back and sat down again, looking at Aja like she was a proud mother. The rest of her friends looked overjoyed, and Aja’s heart was filled with a nervous pride.

“Is that why you’ve been acting so distant?” Alexis asked. “Because you were afraid of us judging you or something?”

“Yes, and no,” Aja replied. “Which brings me onto my second thing, I guess.”

Alexis nodded at her encouragingly.

“Well, you guys know Farrah?” she asked. Stupid question, but somewhat a time delay.

They all nodded in unison, and a couple of them shared a confused glance.

“We’ve been… close. Even before our teams had to come together. I was there when she got mugged. We’ve been - friends? I guess - since then. So, I’ve been walking home with her after practice and all our games, and that’s why I’ve been blowing you all off. I’m sorry about that, truly.”

The Glamazons stared back at her, stunned. Their previous happy expressions were dead, now replaced with stiff, gaunt faces.

“You blew us off just to walk home with someone else?” Alexis questioned. “You could’ve-”

“I know, and I’m sorry,” Aja said.

“Can’t she walk home by herself?” Shea asked. “I know she whines and all, but she’s not a little kid.”

That statement filled Aja top-full with rage. “It’s scary for her, okay?!” was all she managed to get out through her anger. “She was mugged, for fuck’s sake!”

“Aja, calm it,” Sasha said softly, looking between her and Shea. “I’m sure Shea didn’t mean anything bad by that. And thank you for being honest with us.” Aja shot her a quick smile, her irritation still flaring.

“It’s just… a shock,” Jaymes added. “You know the B-52 Bombers have been our rivals for years, and still kind of are.”

Aja simply nodded. “Yeah.”

“You guys are just gonna let this go?” Alexis countered, crossing her arms over her chest. “It took her weeks to tell us this, something that’s actually very important. I mean, do you know what would’ve happened if anyone had known about the friendship before we started practising for the tryouts?”

“Yes, and I knew someone would react like this!” Aja exclaimed. “We’re friends, okay? I’m friends with a Bomber.”